#humanized birds

[la-artist322]

The Moa and Haast's Eagle as both sexually humanized babes. Moa's the tribal group of giant woman (standing 10 feet), and while Haast's the feminine warriors that hunted them while involved preyed slavery easily, both lived in the island's forests.

And even though unfortunately, just like their bird counterparts, they're so too as extinct in the 1400's.

Art © Me

[gawki]

Royal Pigeon

[sticksandsharks]

Well, you heard it here first, folks.

Little side comic for my SBCF24 debut, Sacred Bodies.

ba'it babies? important.

[heckyeahponyscans]

The H5N1 (bird flu) virus is going around, and cats are proving especially susceptible to it. A big cat sanctuary in Washington state had TWENTY of their big cats (cougars, tigers, etc) die of bird flu.

There have also been cases of indoor-only domestic cats getting sick or even dying of bird flu after contracting it from raw cat food. And of course coming into contact with birds also puts your cat at risk.

To keep your cat safe:

Keep them away from birds, preferably keeping them entirely inside. If they are indoor-outdoor then remove any bird feeders from your yard to make cat-bird contact less likely.

Do NOT feed them raw food of any sort, including freeze-dried raw food. Freezing will not kill the virus!

A lot of raw pet food companies are using PR speak to assure customers that their raw food is safe. Remember that at the end of the day their priority is to make money and stay in business. Unless they are testing every bird carcass for the virus their assurances are meaningless, and they certainly are not testing every bird because it would be too expensive.

Cooking kills most viruses and bacteria, including H5N1.

[calebauer]

threads of heaven and earth 🕊️

[monowires]

i can’t say “angry birds ratios a transphobe” was on my 2023 bingo card, but i’m not disappointed

[lieutenant-fred]

I'm so bored and tired, have a species swap

[bunnis-monsters]

i need more abt peacock hybrids I LOVE HIMM

He’s been hanging around your bakery nearly every day since you rejected him, his tail feathers flicking and wanting to present themselves to you… but he stops himself.

He waits, watching you as you serve customers and go about your day. You’re kind, always giving even the nastiest of people a warm smile when you hang them their order.

And now he’s wondering how many of the smiles you have him were fake. Could he blame you? After all, he had been such an asshole, always taking up your time and being demanding…

It was clear you are way out of his league, but still he wants you desperately.

So he continues taking note of every little thing, from the way your eyes light up when you bite into a free donut after a long day, or how you laugh at your stupid male coworker he hates…

He’s in love with you, that’s for certain… but how will he ever win you over when he’s made such a fool of himself? It would have been so easy to just present his feathers in front of a fertile female, but no, he had to fall in love with you…

The peacock hybrid sits outside of the bakery, sulking as he stares at the ground. Perhaps he’d never get to have you. It wasn’t fair to wait around and bother you forever, so he got up and was ready to leave when you walked out the door.

“You’re still out here sulking?”

You walk out, carrying a brown paper bag. He looks up in surprise when you drop the bag in his lap.

“Here…”

You look away, your face slightly warm as you begin walking home. “It’s on the house…”

He stares at the small paper bag in his hand, his eyes wide. Was this… a courting gift?

His feathers flicked as he stood, his mind in a daze as he followed after you.

Maybe he had a chance after all…

It wasn’t long before he walked you home every day after work, acting as a protective mate would when anyone approached. He’d shake his feathers out in a defensive display, keeping you safe.

The best day of his life was when you finally invited him in your home and he got to mate you for the first time…

It was a cold evening, and he had been waiting outside for an hour, ready to walk you home. When you saw him shivering, you knew that he had changed.

Though he could still be selfish and arrogant, it was clear he truly cared for you.

“You’re cold, aren’t you? Come on, I’ll make you something warm.”

But it seemed he didn’t want to eat anything you could make him. No, the second he was in your house you were lifted up onto the nearest surface and your thighs were pried apart. He couldn’t stand it, he needed to taste you…

Your pussy was so plump and warm, the taste almost sweet. He looked up at you with eyes dazed from lust, his tongue fucking into your dripping cunt.

He loved you, wanted to prove he was a proper mate, so he made sure to bring you to several orgasm before he even fathomed pushing his cock into you.

The tip was oozing precum, rubbing against your hole as his feathers shook out. They really were pretty, and his cock stretched you out as he pushed in.

His feathers were soft, and you held onto them as he mated with you, his face burying itself into your neck. This is what he had wanted for so long…

After shooting thick ropes of cum inside of you, he carried you away and made you a comfy nest of blanket and pillows before using his feathers as a cover for you.

“I love you… please, be my mate…”

You yawned, a smile on your face. He looked vulnerable, his plumage puffing out slightly in anticipation.

“Okay…”

His eyes lit up, but he yelped when you plucked one of his feathers. “I’ll take this as my wedding ring…”

And the next day he couldn’t be prouder, seeing you with his feather pinned to your apron.

Want more of this guy? Commission me :3

———————

NSFW TAGLIST: @avalordream @icommitwarcrimes @bazpire @im-eating-rn @anglingforlevels @kinshenewa @pasteldaze @yoongiigolden @peachesdabunny @murder-hobo @leiselotte @misswonderfrojustice @dij-ology @i8kaeya @lollboogurl @h3110-dar1in9 @keikokashi @aliceattheart @mssmil3y @spicyspicyliving @namjoons-t1ddies @izarosf1833 @healanette @lem-hhn @spufflepuff @honey-crypt @karljra @zyettemoon1800 @exodiam @vexillum-moeru @imperfectlyperfectprincess1 @binnieonabike @enchantedsylveon @mysticranger575 @readeryn68 @danielle143 @kittenlover614 @filthybunny420 @annavittoria-mm @makimamybelovedwife @blubearxy @omglovelylaila @toocollectionchaos-universe-blog @fruk-you-usuk-fans @wil10wthetree @hammerhead96-blog @slightlyusedfloormat @bubblez-blop @sunshineangel-reads @heroneki-neko

[yourangle-yuordevil]

[Birds of a feather AU] Absolutely incapable of asking each-other out normally in every single universe <.<

[sunflower-rose]

works every time

[inbabylontheywept]

Soviet Birds.

The secret facility that I work in has holes in the ceiling. We don't know how to get them fixed.

We tried asking the government to fix it, once. We told them that the holes in the older parts of the facility had gotten large enough to fit birds through, and that birds were getting through, and that, perhaps, a Soviet Spy could fit through as well.

After all, it is well known that Soviet Spies and pigeons are approximately the same diameter.

Our hope was that that this vague and nonsensical threat would put a little fire under Uncle Sam's feet. If the fed couldn't be bothered to give a shit about the giant gaping holes in the roof of our facility, perhaps they could be persuaded to give a shit about... Soviet Spies.

This attempt at manipulation 100% blew up in our faces.

See, the government does not need to be persuaded to give a shit about Soviet Spies. It still wakes up most nights, drenched in cold sweat, terrified and confident that a Soviet Spy is hiding in their nightstand. If it sees a rock on the ground, it flips it over, pistol drawn, ready to shoot the Soviet Spy it fully expects to slither out from underneath. Which is to say: The government is crazy. So when we dropped those two words - inflitration risk - in the repair request, they came in guns-a-blazin'.

Does that mean that they fixed the roof? Of course not. Don't be stupid. No, instead of performing basic maintenance, they installed a state of the art alarm system throughout the facility - lasers, sonar, the works - and told us to always be on the guard. Because of the roof holes.

Then they left.

So now we had an extremely good alarm system... and birds. Which have combined in incredibly obvious and predictable ways to produce an unending fountain of problems.

For Example: About once a month, someone gets called in by the local airforce dispatch because AAAAAAAAAAA a Spy is in the Rad Lab! We're all gonna die! Except every time, it's a bird. And I get why we have to check, but every time, the dispatcher is panicked and the person going out has to be like listen, listen: It's a bird. It's always a bird. It's been a bird every month for the last fifteen years. It will be a bird next month. All this stress? Bad for your heart.

Second Example: Sometimes, birds get in while we're actually working. And when it's in the morning, you know, it's a nuisance, and it stops testing (we are not going to risk irradiating a bird) but it's not an all-hands-on-deck situation because it doesn't take ten hours to get a bird out. But surprisingly often, the bird gets in riiiiight at closing time, and in that situation, everyone goes feral because nobody can leave until the alarm is set, and we cannot set the alarm while the bird is there, because the bird would immediately trigger it and then we'd have to stay another 4 hours to confirm that it was not a Soviet Bird.

So in order to go home, everyone's top priority is Get That Bird. And we have a system for it.

Step 1: The test stands tend to be located in rooms with 30+ foot ceilings. We can't catch birds in places like that - so we have to lure the bird into the relatively low ceilinged (8 feet only) upper offices.

We do this by turning all the lights off in the test rooms, then putting floodlights by the exits. I don't know why this works - some kind of evolutionary brain fragment shared by both Bugs and Birds - but work it does. The birds almost always follow after the lights. From there, it’s just two guys moving the floodlight and a third guy to turn off the lights.

Step 2: Everyone else has been waiting for this step. There is this long stairway up from the basement level into the offices, and in the final stage, the floodlights are brought to the base of the stairwell to bring the bird up. At the top of the steps there will be a group of tennish people, waiting for the signal. The light guys will set up the final transfer, everyone will tense, and then, swish...a bird will flit up the stairs and into the offices.

It's like watching werewolves on a full moon. Before the bird cometh, we are engineers. Nerds. Pale and skinny things, trembling under the fluorescent lights. After the bird, we are beasts. Feral, gnawing things, glowing under the orange sunrise of the 70's halogen floodlights.

And like all beasts, we cannot help but give chase.

Step 3: The were-engineers begin the hunt. The goal at the start is not really to catch the bird - just exhaust it. So the pack simply does not relent. Because the stakes are going home on time, the group is basically given free reign to go anywhere in the building. If someone's door is open, and the bird goes inside, they're going to have to deal with ten sweaty panting maniacs leaping around their office. They don't get to say that they're busy, or remark on how all this movement is a terrible distraction. They are allowed to sit in silence during the chaos, and perhaps thank the war party for chasing the bird while they sat comfortably on their ass. This has been explained several times, and it will continue to be explained until cooperation is achieved.

Anyway.

The chase can go on for quite some time. Sometimes, the bird will get tired and find a crevice to hide in, where it can then be reached through standard cornered-bird catching techniques.

Other times, it will slow down enough that someone can actually yoink it out of the air. But this will go on until someone catches the bird and triggers Step 4.

Step 4: The Finale. This is the get-the-bird-out-of-the-building stage, and it requires someone to adopt a specific role: To Become the Sacrificial Vessel of Bird Removal.

This job is both coveted and feared. It's coveted, because holding a wild bird in one's hands is a precious thing. To feel how small, and fragile, and scared it is, only to free it from the building? That is what it's like to be a benevolent God. But the cost! Oh, the cost. The entire time the Vessel is in motion, the bird will be biting the hell out of their fingers. And I cannot emphasize enough just how painful bird bites are. Their entire face is a set of needle posed pliers, and they know tricks the even the cartels haven't figured out yet. So there's always a little hubbub about who shall be The Vessel while onlookers, stranded outside The Office of Bird Capture, can only look on. Quiet arguments and pleas are heard, little fragments of fear and pride and glory trickling out of room like the silver dust left behind in a bag of well shook quarters. The sound of concensus is silence, and the argument will go on until that's all that's left. And then, from the darkness of the final office, the chosen sacrifice will step forward: Hands gently cupped, tears streaming down their face, fingers trembling from the pain of the ongoing bird chomps.

And this scene is what organizes people. Not leadership, not truly. No one can think and coordinate a crowd while their fingers are being attacked with a combination nutcracker/ear piercer. But the crowd sees the suffering of their annointed, and it is driven to do everything poossible to make the process flow. People instinctively flair out, finding the fastest path outside. Doors are held open. Paths are cleared. Someone, somehow, always knows the way forward and can describe it to the sufferer. Left, left, forward. Corner closet. Yep, there's a hall in there. Forward. Two-hundred more feet man, you're doing great. Just hold it together a little longer. You're killing it.

Then the final door swings open, and the bird flees out into what remains of daylight. And yet, even here, the deed is not yet done. I cannot explain it in words, but the crowd that helped is never content until they can see and speak on the Bird Vessel's wounds. They all have to pull the fingers back and see what was given. Estimate the price: One day to get better - No, three - No, a week! Are you blind? Do you see that blood blister? -Yeah, that's not going away anytime soon - Damn, can you believe how feisty those things are? Like wolves without teeth.

(They cannot help but touch as they go. It has always been this way. Even Thomas was not content until he felt the wounds in Christ's hands.)

Only when the last of the helpers has seen, and commented, and commended, will the engineers scatter. It is their return from the underworld that announces to the sun living surface dwellers that they too can go home. (@somerunner tolja it needed to be a post.)

[queenie-ofthe-void]

Steve knows the kids are obsessed with the newest up and coming metal band, Corroded Coffin, even though their music is actually terrible. But when Robin of all people begs Steve take them to the band's next gig, he relents.

Everything starts to make a lot more sense when they walk up to the stage and there's an honest to god Siren behind the microphone, a guitar slung low on his hips with magic wafting off him in waves over the crowd.

The singer clocks him immediately and quickly schools the flash of surprise in his eyes into something more flirtatious.

Steve smiles, the cat that caught the canary. He was right. Their music really does suck, and he can't wait until tomorrow when he can rub it in his tiny human friends' faces.

Tonight, however, he's going to ruffle a pretty boy's feathers.

~~~

Eddie knows his music's horse shit, tailor made for humans- sue him, they needed the money. So he's always a little surprised when another creature finds their way to his concerts. It happens on occasion, and of course they're always welcomed. He's seen all sorts on their tour.

But something as beautifully unholy as a Nephilim?

The man with the auburn hair and hazel eyes surrounded by a gaggle of children glows with a golden aura so soft and warm Eddie's almost left speechless. Almost.

He's caught staring, but he can't take his eyes away. So Eddie does what Sirens do best. He preens, puffs his sleek black feathers just enough for only the man in the crowd to see and sings. A move typically saved for encores, the crowd goes wild with energy and pushes their way towards the stage.

The Nephi laughs, full-bodied with mirth at the antics. A beacon of golden light bursts from him, control of his halo slipping just the slightest.

It's unearthly, it's sinful, and Eddie falls to his knees in worship. The men and women caught in the halo turn to him, smiling and leaning in and touching what is Eddie's--

But the Angel relaxes, the halo draws back, and the peoples' hands fall away even though their eyes linger.

None of that matters when the Angel blows him a kiss. Eddie knows, deep in the hollows of his bones, that when he finds him after the show, he'll stretch his Angel's wings and show him just how bright his halo can glow.

[specshroom]

🪶 Bird hybrid thoughts

🪶 Bird hybrid lover who is very cranky and insecure when they start moulting. You reassure them by taking warm baths with them to soothe their itchy skin. You just listen to them grumble while running your hands through their wings to gently dislodge any loose feathers.

🪶 Parrot lover that can't stop preening and nuzzling you when they get closer to mating season.

🪶 Peacock men who are soooo pampered and spoilt. They expect to be lavished and admired and they usually are. Peacock man who adores and worships his comparatively plain looking peacock wife.

🪶 Vulture guys who are scary and mean. Definitely not the type you want to introduce to your parents. They're terrible teases and like to play with their prey.

🪶 Falcons who are very proud and powerful, they boast a huge wing span and lightning flight speeds. Usually very athletic types. Can be put under the himbo/herbo/thembo category.

🪶 Crow partner who looks super scary and mysterious but once you get to know them their actually a huge nerd and kinda goofy.

🪶 Very hyper hummingbird hybrids who are usually small and very energetic. Can't get them to stay still or on the ground for even a minute. They usually have a sweet tooth.

🪶 Seagull fishermen and tropical penguin surfer dudes.

🪶 Introverted owls who stick to themselves and like lazy mornings, lazy days and lazy nights. Can come off as cold and indifferent but they're just not very sociable.

🪶 Charming song birds who serenade their lovers with their beautiful voices and colourful feathers.

🪶 Doves being hopeless romantics. Dove couples are known for their annoying and dramatic pda.

🪶Tall and graceful crane hybrids. Very sophisticated and sometimes snobbish.

🪶 A human who patiently watches their hybrid bird boyfriend do a mating dance for them. While they don't fully understand it, they appreciate the effort and their lover appreciates their willingness to go along with his traditions.

[sticksandsharks]

I'm part of the ShortBox Comic Fair again, and this year I'm writing a story about a woman who marries a bird(??)

[monstersholygrail]

having thoughts about the bird hybrids building us a nest and fucking us in it

Now that you were living with the all male bird hybrid colony, they knew that you needed a proper nest. Your fully human body couldn’t handle the rough textures of branches, plastic, and other materials they found on their hunts.

No, you deserved only the best. The biggest and softest of nesting materials. Your gorgeous plump body could only rest on the most exquisite blankets and pillows. Anything less and they would shred it to pieces with a fierce ferocity. You needed the best humans had to offer.

They had minimal experience with the fully human populace outside of what they saw in passing and going to your dance classes. They much preferred to stay in purely hybrid spaces. But for you they would do anything and go anywhere.

Flying into the human city in a large group, the colony swoops down, peering through the windows of human homes. They were in awe seeing how comfortable all these humans lived with all these pillows and blankets on their couches, chairs, and beds. They even had weird little blankets on their tables.

The colony flew to every house they could that had an unlocked window. They’d swoop in, take all they need, and swoop back out. Sure, they knew it was wrong, but where else would they get such luxuries? They wouldn’t let something silly like human laws stop them.

Returning home they get set to work. Building you the finest nest anyone’s ever seen. It was far superior to other hybrids nests close by. The colony felt pride in how well they took care of you.

When setting up the reveal they turned it into this whole show, also wanting you to see how well they could take care of you as your new official mates. Your gasp of awe as you set your eyes on the huge pile of blankets and pillows has them preening, their features ruffling as they damn near start peacocking.

Hands are all over you in a way you’ve grown to find overwhelming pleasant as they guide you into the nest. They lay you down and you’re so busy looking around you barely notice as they slip your clothes off.

“Where did you guys get all of this?” You ask in your surprise, your mind only starting to let you feel a bit concerned as to what they could’ve gotten into now.

But there’s no need for questions, not when you all could be doing something so much better. They liked you all mindless and too dazed to even speak. They should definitely get started on that.

“Do you like it, mate? We should test it out first to make sure. If you don’t I’m sure the human wouldn’t mind getting their stuff back.”

You’re already so breathless as their hands roam over you, massaging your flesh in their hands, pinching at your nipples, and gliding through your soaked folds. But some of their words do manage to get through.

“Wha—“ you start before you’re effectively cut off by one of your mates sliding inside your hot cunt in one solid stroke.

You don’t know how many hours pass as your mates break in their new nest with you. Fucking into you with so much love and tenderness. This is your new home, the place for you to be with them always. As they have you squirming and writhing on each of their cocks your heart feels so full.

They brush and cover you in their feathers, forcing the most pleasant sensations over every inch of your soft and squishy body. They thrust their cocks as hard and as deep inside you as they can, wanting to reach a whole new level of connection with you, their precious mate.

All of the bird hybrids relish in each beautiful orgasm you give them, falling off the edge over and over, clenching down on their thick cocks as though you never wanna leave. And maybe you don’t. This nest and them with you inside of it is pure bliss.

By the time they’re done with you, you feel like you’re floating. They’re all cuddled around in a big pile, sated coos and tweets echo through the air. Even if they aren’t touching you at the moment you can feel each of them in your heart. Their warmth and their caress has your body humming wonderfully.

You suddenly don’t care where exactly they got these blankets and pillows from. All you know is that you wanna keep it.

[calebauer]

skyborne symphony ✨💫🌟💫✨