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starfiretheninja · 6 years ago

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Heartbeat- Robstar Week Day 7

*flops over* I am finally done with this piece and only a day late for Robstar week! I’ve had this idea for a while now and I decided to kick it out for such a special occasion. I hope you enjoy it!

Summertime in Jump City was a mixed bag at times. Lounging on the beach and spending all day swimming in the ocean was relaxing for the Titans in between battles that left them sweating profusely. The flavorful iced drinks that Cyborg concocted was best enjoyed when the days were too hot for even stepping outside.

During a particularly intense heat wave, Robin resorted to wearing casual clothing when at the Tower. Having little air circulation thanks to his black collar left him sweltering, testing his body’s endurance to the scorching heat. Having spent his younger years in Bludhaven, he had grown accustomed to cooler, milder temperatures. While the ocean did provide some relief, California temperatures inevitably rose. The city seemed to slow as no villains enacted any nefarious plans for the past several days. Robin was relieved at this as the Titans, himself included, preferred to pass through the heat wave at a sluggish pace without any strenuous activity.

When Red Star called them and asked for assistance in Russia about an unexplainable snowstorm, Robin immediately volunteered himself to go. Seeing some snow in the summer could be refreshing, despite the possible threat the storm held. Beast Boy started openly complaining about this decision, but then quieted down with a mischievous glint in his eye, saying something about an indoor water slide under his breath.

Robin gave him a side-glance, making a mental note to double check the Tower’s water damage insurance. Red Star then politely asked the Titans if two of them could assist his team, as they were stretched thin across the continent. He also noted that someone who could fly would be best as they could traverse the continent faster.

The boys turned to Starfire and Raven simultaneously. Raven patted Starfire’s shoulder.

“Here’s your flier,” Raven said. “I’m not in the mood to lose my toes to frostbite in July.”

With that decided, the two Titans immediately set a course for Russia with the T-Ship. After some detective work on Robin’s end, they eventually tracked down a facility where a new villain dubbed Eclipser was hiding. Upon sneaking in, the Titans found that her storm machine was generating unnatural wind currents to cover half of Russia in intense blizzards, allowing her to sneak into multitudes of national banks with minimal police interference.

Seeing an opportune moment when her back was turned, the Titans disabled the machine and attempted to nab Eclipser. The villain was true to her name, as she was extremely skilled at creating darkness to slink in, namely through pellets that emitted dark mist and killing the lights with an emergency power shutdown protocol. Robin nearly had her, as he was skilled in navigating the night from his time in Gotham, but Eclipser managed to dart away on her impressively silent hover car.

With the machine down, the wind currents would eventually die down, but there was still a villain to catch. The Titans rushed back to the T-Ship and followed in her wake. Navigating deeper into the blizzard, they closed in on the speeding hover car and managed to take out the engine. Touching down, the Titans could hardly believe their eyes when Eclipser was nowhere in sight.

“We cannot let her escape! I shall go this way. The two of you that way,” Redstar commanded.

“Are you sure it’s a good idea to split up? The blizzard hasn’t gone down yet,” Robin questioned.

“This storm is fairly mild, you will have no problem finding your way,” Redstar said confidently. “If the storm keeps up, then return to the ship and take shelter.”

“If we are quick, we are certain to find her,” Starfire agreed. She and Robin shared a look. Normally they would hesitate to take such a risk. However, if Redstar had confidence that they would make it through this storm, then they had little to fear. He knew which storms were untraversable and which were manageable. And besides, as long as Robin and Starfire were together, they would find a way through.

“I’ll mark the location of the T-Ship on our communicators. Meet back here if he can’t find her. Good luck,” Robin said. Starfire grabbed hold of his arms and took to the air.

Even with two pairs of eyes searching, the Titans couldn’t find a trace of Eclipser. For all they knew, her dark outfit could have blended in with the scraggly trees or the rocky terrain they were passing by. In a moment, the freezing winds went from barely tolerable to whipping strong.

A burst of wind hit Starfire’s side, sending the Titans spinning uncontrollably in the air. Starfire’s grip unfailingly held Robin, but her flight pattern was severely hampered, as she was barely able to straighten her flight pattern.

“Should we head back? The storm is growing stronger here,” Starfire managed, barely able to keep her eyes open.

“It looks like it’s moving back towards the T-Ship. We could try, but we might not make it back in these conditions,” Robin grunted, the winds chilling his very bones. Starfire turned to fly back towards the T-Ship, but the winds refused to let up on the heroes. Robin kept his eyes pointed downward to lessen the wind buffeting into them.

“Wait, Starfire land down there!”

“Is it the Eclipser?”

“No, but it’s the next best thing.”

Listening to him, Starfire brought them down, finding herself at the face of a rocky hill. Despite the dark of the storm, she was able to make out what Robin had somehow spotted.

“We can take shelter in this cave for now. It’s not ideal, but the storm’s getting too strong and this will keep us both out of the wind. We can keep searching when the storm lets up,” Robin explained, treading inside to check for any resting bears. “Let’s just hope we don’t have any residents in here.”

Starfire nearly missed how Robin began to instinctively hold his limbs closer to his body, his breath curling around him in a frosty swirl. While he wasn’t shivering yet, thanks to his signature parka, hypothermia was a very real risk in an icy cave.

“If this storm is to continue, then perhaps we should build a fire,” she suggested, her tone filled with concern.

“Good idea. Go ahead and grab one of those trees. We’ll use the branches for firewood and the trunk to block wind from coming in,” Robin said, already imagining the warmth of the flames.

Robin proceeded to make a call to Redstar to let them know what their situation was, reassuring Redstar that he couldn’t have known the conditions given how unpredictable Eclipser had made them out to be. In the meantime, Starfire made work up uprooting a nearby tree and snapping off the larger branches. Setting the trunk to partially block the cave entrance, Robin used his birdarang to chop the branches into enough acceptably shaped logs to last them through the night. Arranging a neat firepit towards the back of the cave, Starfire heated the kindling with a stationary starbolt. Within minutes, a fire was blazing, bringing a soft glow to the dreary cave.

Robin, seated on the cave floor, leaned close into the fire. His breathing began to shudder, even with the warmth his parka provided him. Attempting to generate heat, Robin ran his hands up and down his arms. The cold wouldn’t kill him, especially since the cave shielded them from the wind, but that didn’t make the freezing temperatures any more pleasant.

If it’s not the sun trying to wear me down, it’s snow in summer. Go figure, Robin chuckled inwardly. He looked up to catch Starfire watching him. She had noticed his shivering.

“Heh. I-i-it must be nice t-to be temperature resilient,” Robin chattered, trying to make light of the situation. He cringed at how obvious his shivering was.

“It is most useful in times such as this, but you do not have this ability,” Starfire noted.

“My a-adrenaline is wearing down from chasing that lady. And I think I got a little too used to the summer heat back in Jump,” Robin said. “I’ll be alright. The fire will do the job.”

At this, Starfire gave Robin a questioning look. A few long moments passed between them. Before Robin could open his mouth, Starfire stood up and walked over to her boyfriend.

“What are you-?” Robin started before becoming completely flustered. Starfire had seated herself directly behind him, stretching her legs around him so that he was practically sitting in her lap. Gently she draped her arms over his and nestled her head between his shoulder and cheek. Robin could have sworn his face turned pink at this intimacy.

“Perhaps the source of the fire would be more effective at warming you?” she suggested, some cheekiness in her tone. Beyond embarrassed, Robin could hardly get a response out.

“You’re probably right. . .”

Sensing his slight discomfort, Starfire lifted her head to turn to him more fully.

“Is this comfortable for you?” she asked.

“This is fine for me.” It wasn’t as if he and Starfire hadn’t spooned before. It was only that. . .

“Just, I’m typically the one who’s sitting behind you. It’s just a little different having you be the big spoon,” he supposed. Robin relaxed and rested his back into Starfire, growing more comfortable with their current position.

“Different in what way? This position is certainly unusual for us, but I am guessing that you are referring to something else,” Starfire questioned. The Tamaranean had an inkling that Robin was thinking about an Earthen custom that she had yet to learn. The two were normally in sync with one another’s thoughts, but understanding one another’s customs was always a work in progress.

“Well, I’m just used to being the one who you’re cuddled up to, rather than the other way around,” Robin attempted, knowing his explanation didn’t make much sense.

“Are you suggesting that it is normally the male in a relationship that initiate such physical contact?” Starfire offered, remembering what she had learned from her many nights of watching romantic comedies with Cyborg.

“Kind of. I know that you’re the one who initiates more and I really like that about you. It definitely helped us to get together,” Robin smiled at her, flashes of their first kiss coming back to him. “I’m more talking about being in the more vulnerable person here. You’re the one protecting me right now.”

“Oh! You feel displaced by being protected as to being the protector,” Starfire connected the dots. “I have been informed that the boyfriend is the one with the role of protecting his girlfriend.”

Robin chuckled. Starfire had been on Earth for over 3 years now, much shorter than Robin’s entire lifespan, and yet she could pick up on these customs faster than he could verbalize them.

“Don’t get me wrong, I’m grateful that you’re helping me stay warm. And it’s not like we don’t go out of our way to look after each other. I’m just still getting used to letting you protect me when there’s not much I can do to help you right now,” Robin explained honestly. The Boy Wonder simply didn’t want to let his girlfriend down and give off the impression that he was weak. Robin’s rational side told him that Starfire was proud of his strengths and there was no shame in letting her help as she had done many times before. There was still that niggling anxiety that he wanted to be honest with her about. The sooner he expressed such fears, the sooner he could confront and defeat them.

Despite these anxieties, Robin felt a sense of calm knowing that Starfire was with him through this storm.

“Oh Robin, you have protected me by locating this cave when the storm would not allow for travel. You have fulfilled your role, dear boyfriend. Now allow me to fulfill mine,” she said softly, her warmth pouring over Robin. She rested her head on Robin’s shoulder once more, snuggling into him.

“I suppose that’s fair,” Robin chuckled lightly.

Taking Starfire’s hands in his own, he wrapped her arms gently around his chest. The two pressed their cheeks together, smiling at their closeness. Sighing contently, the two basked in the glow of the fire and the warmth of each other’s company. Even though a cave in the heart of a blizzard wasn’t the most ideal cuddling spot, the pair was relieved for that they could gain quality time out of a difficult mission. Thanks to the recent decrease in crime, the two had been able to spend many lazy evenings together at the Tower. Unfortunately, their disgruntled teammates had more than once walked in on their romantic time in the past month.

Most often, Cyborg would catch them kissing in unusual spots around their home and often told them to ‘go that mushy stuff elsewhere’. He was probably rejoicing that they were out of the Tower for the time being so he could get some peace of mind.

Speaking of which . . .

“Hey Star?”

“Hmm?” she let out, breaking out of the trance that the warmth of the fire and Robin’s closeness had on her.

“You know, my face still feels a little cold,” Robin started as he turned to face her. She placed a hand on his cheek to check, concerned.

“They to have warmed sufficiently,” she said, somewhat confused.

His heart fluttered for a moment before he leaned in unexpectedly. Starfire understood in but a moment and smiled as his lips met hers. She blushed for a moment as he pulled away slowly, a giddy smile on her face.

“You wish for me to warm the face that you claim to be cold?” she asked slyly.

Robin smiled and whispered, “If you’d rather leave it cold. . .”

Starfire took his cheek in her hand, her eyelids lowering.

“I would rather not.”

She pulled him into a gentle and tender kiss. The pace was slow at first, the two softly pressing their lips together. Then, turning his body, Robin draped his arms around her waist and rested his hands on the small of her back. The two melted and Starfire clasped the front of his parka and pulled him close. There was a slight urgency, but the underlying gentleness remained. They kissed in the glow of the fire for some time until they broke apart slowly.

Starfire kept her hand curled on his cheek as she whispered, “You were correct.”

“That I wanted you to warm me up?” Robin smirked. “Yes, but also that your face was somewhat cold.”

Robin moved his hand to run it rhythmically through her fiery hair, wishing that he could take off his glove to appreciate the soft texture.

“Well, I’d say that we’re both pretty warm now.”

“Agreed. We should be stranded together on more occasions. I thoroughly enjoy these moments alone with you,” she sighed contently.

As she expressed her enjoyment, she reached down to lift Robin’s legs over to one side so that he was seated more comfortably in her lap. Nodding to herself, Starfire happily leaned her head into Robin’s shoulder and the two held each other close. Their breathing soon aligned perfectly.

“Where should we strand ourselves next? I can easily arrange it,” Robin teased.

“Perhaps a location not as hostile as this,” she said, gesturing the wind still howling outside.

“But the weather’s a great excuse to separate from the team,” he pointed out jokingly. Starfire snickered at his silliness. Before they had started dating, Robin would have never made light of such a scenario. Starfire prided herself in being able to bring out Robin’s more normal teenage side compared to his domineering leader side.

“You are the leader. Can you not simply send them elsewhere?” she said, waggling her oval eyebrow.

“That’d be too easy. And obvious. I don’t want Cyborg and Beast Boy getting too jealous of having you to myself.” At this, Robin tightened his grip around her in a mockingly possessive manner, making Starfire giggle. Those boys loved Starfire like a sister and totally meant it when they, mainly Cyborg, told Robin to treat Starfire right.

“Raven can- what is the phrase- ‘keep them in line’.” Pulling her hand to her mouth to politely cover yawn at said phrase.

“I’m sure she’ll have no problem with that. I don’t think that blizzard is going to let up soon. We should get some sleep so we’ll have energy in the morning,” Robin suggested. It had been a long day of traveling and staking out for the two and a nap was desperately needed.

“Rest is most welcome,” Starfire said sleepily. “Oh! Shall we lay on your cape?”

Robin froze, his face going cold again.

“What?”

“Are we not sleeping together?

“We are?!” he squeaked, pulling back. While he was more than happy to kiss her again should she desire it, asking her to sleep with him never crossed his mind. What shocked him even more was that she was the one suggesting it. Robin knew full well that Starfire wasn’t as innocent as she seemed, but it was difficult to shake that impression of her at times.

“We will need to sleep together to sustain you through the blizzard. And you will retain more heat if you are not directly on the cave floor. Is that not what you wished for?” Starfire clarified, raising her eyebrow at Robin’s reaction.

“O-of course. Right, good idea,” he coughed out sheepishly. “That’s what I thought you meant.

“Robin, what did you believe my intention was?” Starfire probed, trying to make sure she didn’t unintentionally overstep a boundary.

“I- ah- thought that you wanted to . . .” he sputtered. Robin decided it was just better to say it bluntly to her. He didn’t want to risk confusing her with more Earth slang.

“Um. . . have sex,” he finished quietly.

“Oh! My apologies, I did not mean to make you uncomfortable with such a statement,” Starfire immediately apologized, her face taking on a red tint. She internally berated herself for embarrassing Robin like that.

“No, no, I get what you meant. Well, now I do. But don’t worry about it, ‘sleeping with’ just a saying that can have multiple meanings,” Robin reassured her, taking a moment to calm himself. It was just a simple misunderstanding, nothing that they couldn’t handle he told himself.

“I see. Then I shall be cautious about using that saying in the future,” Starfire said firmly. The two shared an awkward smile, which slowly formed into a sincere one.

“Sounds good,” Robin agreed.

Leaning away from her, Robin reached up into his parka to detach his cape from his underlying uniform. He then stood up, reluctantly leaving the warmth of his girlfriend’s lap and instantly feeling chills, and handed the cape to Starfire. In no time at all, Starfire had the cape perfectly flattened out on the rocky floor. She settled down and gently patted the section of the cape closer to the fire while looking up at Robin. He sat down and Starfire moved to wrap her arms around him so his back would be facing her. At this, Robin gently stopped her arms by holding her wrists.

“Robin? Do you wish for ‘the space’?”

Starfire thought maybe she might have been pushing his limits for sleeping. He did like his privacy and she fully respected that, but this was odd to her considering he had made a move on her not too long ago.

“No it’s not that. It’s. . .” he sighed, letting their arms drop. “Let me do this, Starfire. You’ve done enough for me tonight.”

Starfire squinted questioningly at him. Did he doubt her ability to handle the cold through the night? Or was this a classic case of Robin being stubborn and endangering himself by leaving himself more susceptible to the cold?

“I am capable of reserving my body heat. And either way, I will be partially exposed to the cold,” she reminded him firmly. Starfire had believed that Robin was overcoming this vice of never allowing anyone to help him.

“I know you can. But . . . how do I explain this?” he wondered as he looked away, thinking for a moment. He paused, took a breath, and took Starfire’s hands in his.

“I want to wake up tomorrow knowing that I’ve done everything I can to look after you, since you’ve done the same for me. I don’t want to have everything done for me. Does that make sense?” he said as clearly as he could.

“So, this is a matter of pride?” she hit the heart of the matter.

“Exactly. And don’t get me wrong on this, but the guys will never let me live it down if I let you do this. They don’t think less of you or anything like that,” he quickly added. “They just hold certain standards for me and I want to do the best that I can for you.”

Starfire pondered his explanation for a moment, before relaxing her tense shoulders. Robin was not being stubborn for the sake of appearing stronger. He simply wanted to be a gentleman to her in any way that he could. While their predicament may not have required him to be a gentleman in covering her back for the night, Starfire’s heart warmed over the fact that Robin would perform such small, but meaningful, acts for her.

“I believe I understand. Earthen customs are most complex,” she said, gentleness returning to her voice.

Robin let out a sigh of relief. His communication skills had certainly improved from the days when him blurting that Starfire wasn’t his girlfriend contributed to them being stranded on a hostile alien planet.

Starfire turned her back to him so that he could, at least in his viewpoint, uphold his pride and satisfy his need to protect her from the freezing wind off her back. The wind would still hit her front, but there was always her star energy to provide her warmth. Robin wrapped his arms around her and gently laid them both down, side by side. He was immensely happy to have his source of sunshine back in his proximity.

“They really are. I guess you don’t notice until someone points it out,” he said. The two settled on the hard floor as best as they could.

“Starfire?”

“Is there yet another custom that we must uphold?” she asked in a slightly teasing tone.

“Well, there is one . . . But besides that, thanks for being so understanding. I really appreciate it,” Robin genuinely thanked her. How lucky was he to have an outstandingly understanding girlfriend?

“That is only because I have a patient teacher,” she chirped. Starfire had certainly adapted to Earth’s customs far more than she had ever hoped to and she wanted to continue learning if she were to remain by Robin’s side.

“What was the final custom that we are to uphold?” Starfire asked after a few quiet moments.

“Oh! Well . . . I was kinda hoping for a goodnight kiss, but if you’re too tired then that’s fine.” Robin had only brought it up on an impulse. He changed his mind and decided that, considering all he was asking of her, he shouldn’t push it.

Without saying a word, Starfire turned on her back and planted a quick kiss on his lips. She then turned onto her side again and settled back into Robin, closing her eyes to begin to drift off.

“Silly Robin. You need only ask.”

Robin smiled and gladly held Starfire close to him. He inhaled her sweet scent, as he too closed his eyes.

“Goodnight, Starfire.”

“Pleasant shlorvaks, Robin.”

They soon fell asleep to the crackle of the fire and the rhythm of one another’s heartbeats.

#robstarweek #robstar #robin #starfire #teen titans #fanfic #i write #i'm such a slow writer but i finally finished it #no matter if you're an earth boy and his alien gf discussion of gender roles is always an interesting topic to tackle #especially when it comes to how you treat one another

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infiniteconedrill · 6 years ago

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Far Cry 5 review and other ramblings

My experience with the Far Cry series has always been a bit spotty, with nothing to blame but my tendency to get easily distracted. When I fist purchased my PS3 in the spring of 2009, I bought all kinds of games in order to catch myself up. I had just finished college, and had been intentionally starving myself of the gaming experience in favor of focusing only on my studies with absolutely no other distractions. I know myself well, ya see, and I knew that if I allowed my brain to wander into game land, I would be fucked in terms of getting that important homework done on time. During the buying spree I found myself in once I graduated, I stumbled upon Far Cry 2 which I had read great things about. I tucked the game aside with the plan to dive into the experience once I was done playing the other games I was more interested in, like Elder Scrolls: Oblivion, and Metal Gear 4. FC 2 always beckoned me, though, and I couldn’t wait to dive into its world.

Fast forward to 2012, and several Dead Spaces later. My video games were accumulating, and several titles I had meant to get to were still collecting dust in their still-sealed states, among them, FC 2. I still looked longingly at it, but began thinking to myself “Hmm, the game is now 4 years old, and the graphics are going to look rough. I’ve probably missed out on any charm it once had, and I’ve only got myself to blame. Ahh, fuck it, I’ll get to it eventually. Maybe.” It made more sense to me to start playing FC 3 since that was the newest latest, and I had just been given the game for free to test out and review for the Amazon Vine program. “I’ll make time”, I lied.

Skip ahead yet again to early 2016, with both FC 2 and FC 3, sealed and snuggled deep inside a box behind my TV, untouched and nearly forgotten about. Amazon Vine once again offered me the latest Unisoft release, Far Cry Primal. Wondering if it would just become another one of my untraversed gaming terrains, I reminded myself that if I order FCP, I will HAVE to play it as the Vine program requires reviewers to submit their opinion of the game rather than making it optional. This is exactly the kind of forced motivation I needed to get shit done. Besides that, I was still beckoned at this point, forcefully tapped on the shoulder to hurry up and play this series that I had been blowing off for literally 7 years up to this point. I received the game after a few days, and made the first step in actually removing the seal from a FC game disc -- a momentous feat upon itself. I wondered if FCP would be much different than all of the numbered FC’s -- after all, FCP had invented its own tribal, prehistoric language and apparently (by what I had read) created a world that existed outside the bad guy/villain framework of the rest of the games in the series. I fired up the PS4, and the intro began, thus beginning my adventures into the FC world.

Once I began playing FCP, I couldn’t put the controller down. I mean, I was really impressed. What I loved about the game is how the developers inherently knew what gamers want to experience. The game was great about giving you reality where you want to experience reality, then giving you an over-the-top, bombastic experience at precisely the right time. Designing games this big isn’t easy, and when you can balance all of the elements in a way that makes gamers want to keep coming back for more, you’re doing something pretty special. FCP didn’t do anything groundbreaking -- it was more or less a sandbox game with all of the typical open-world tropes -- but the little touches and peripheral details are what developers have to do to make the game stand out as unique. For example, I was extremely impressed with the language created in this game, and how the characters all communicated with each other. Not a lick of any discernible language is spoken in this game, and that’s a risk in itself. The risk paid off. It made the story easy to get lost in, and I couldn’t help but feel I hadn’t had this type of gaming frame before. By the time I ended the main storyline, I kept playing, hungry for more. Unfortunately, Ubisoft never released any DLC for this game, so I placed it on its shelf and went about to other games in my library.

So FC 2 and 3 still sat on my shelf during this time, and I knew FC 4 existed, though I was determined to not think about it as I didn’t want THREE unplayed FC games taking space in my library. Enter FC 5. The game gets announced, and for once, I am determined to order the game, and not only have the game on day one, but actually play the fucking thing, too. I order the Gold Edition as I see that FC 3 will be getting a remaster, and the buyer will have access to all of the DLC as well. I’m going all-in this time, goddammit. Release day comes, and I download the goods. I have read nothing at all about the game’s story, and have no frame of reference about the plot or characters. I am ready as I’ll ever be...let’s do this shit.

The first element that strikes me is the landscape, and its similarities to FCP. The terrain is gorgeous and well-detailed, flush with animal life and vegetation. I’ve never been to Montana (where the game is set), but I would imagine it looks and sounds just like it’s portrayed in this game, with eagles squawking loudly and rivers flowing freely. Based on the surroundings alone, this is a game that’s easy to get lost in.

The story is an interesting one, and I would guess that Americans in particular will be able to feel something sharp about its meaning and import. The idea of a brainwashed cult is appealing, and the four bosses you must best in this game are all well-fleshed out. Essentially, the plot of the main storyline revolves around some religious kooks who mindlessly follow the Father (Joseph Seed) while getting hopped up on a drug called Bliss in order to be more sheeplike in their mindless worship of a deity who gives them answers to questions they would rather not think about. Sound familiar? In the context of a pure video gaming framework, this can be as boring as you want it to be, but for those who choose to apply this type of tale to our current surroundings, the plot of the story has the ability to take on a hell of a lot of meaning.

Once this groundwork has been established, the meat of the game is your standard fetch-quest type business. An NPC will ask you to get something for them, you’ll go and get it, and they’ll like you a whole lot -- nothing new there. An aspect of the game I really enjoyed that usually irks the shit out of me is the ability to acquire “guns for hire”. Basically, you can recruit nine different characters to fight alongside you, and you can direct them to attack specific enemies. The nine characters are all different in their abilities, and they even offers dozen of verbal asides to keep you entertained as you traipse through the underbrush. My favorites were Jess Black (“nice pussy!”), and Peaches, the unstoppable cougar with frightening stealth skills. What’s fun about multiple guns for hire is that they react to each other and comment to particular skill sets, giving the game a more immersive feel.

The variety of guns is solid as hell. You get all the typical selections, from sniper rifles and shotguns, to strange alien death vacuums. The ammo is plentiful, and it’s easy to fill up as there dozens of NPCs who wander the landscape ready to trade with you. The fast travel feature is great as well, giving you the option to go to any part of the map that you have already cleared out or liberated.

The fighting in FC 5 is an absolute blast. It’s intuitive and flawless, and I haven’t experienced a single technical hiccup or delay anywhere. The AI is average -- in fact, most times the enemy will see you way before you see them. The human enemies you face are more or less just braindead thugs yelling out shit like “I’m gonna kill you!”, but occasionally they’ll say something funny or unique. The body animations as you shoot people is really cool giving the game more depth and realism. For instance, if you shoot someone in the back whilst they’re running away, their back will arc and their arms will flail upward, making you feel satisfied that the scumbag making your life difficult won’t be getting back up.

The voice acting is solid, and is sparse enough to not pull you out of the experience. My favorite characterizations are Jess Black (as I mentioned before), Jacob Seed, and Joseph Seed. There’s some real depth to these characters, giving a lot of life through their real-life voice actors.

The menu is well-laid out and intuitive -- not once did I feel lumbered with trying to navigate an overly-complicated system.

Of course, the game isn’t perfect, and there are a few things that could stand to get cleaned up. One thing that frustrated me about the game is how chaotic the battles can get. I enjoy organized chaos, don’t get me wrong, but FC 5 could stand to separate different functions by laying out the design a little differently. Something that frustrated me is when 10 enemies would be coming at me at once, I’d have both of my guns for hire in place, and then my teammates wouldn’t do anything. They’d sometimes seem to just freeze in place without fighting back, and this would be in totally open areas with no obstructions to their targets. Also, when you kill an enemy, you can loot them, but you can also swap your weapons out with theirs. Fair enough, but it can be cumbersome to try and position yourself in the right spot as to only loot and not swap. When you’re in the heat of the battle, and you just want to loot and not swap, it can be rather annoying trying to do one action but getting another. I can see a lot of players enjoying this type of unpredictability, but it rather bothered me.

Another piece of the game that frustrated me was the inconsistency of the map tracking system. There’s a side quest in the game where you have to go and destroy all of the shrines in Faith’s region, and if you get the proper map, you can see where they all are. I was going through this mission, and about halfway through it, the map stopped showing me where they were. Was there a reason for this? I dunno. I’m not sure if this was a glitch, but it was a head-scratcher for the tracking system to stop working mid-way though the lengthy quest.

I did tend to feel myself getting pulled out of the experience somewhat by the meatheaded-ness (I declare this a word) of some of the quests. There’s a quest where you literally have to run around collecting bull testicles. I’m as immature as the next white male, but seriously? There’s another quest where an inbred redneck requests that you kill four antlered animals and bring the roadkill back for him to BBQ. No thanks. There’s also a lot of boneheaded swearing in the game that seems superfluous rather than colorful. I love to swear, but when every other word is “fuck”, it just gets boring rather than amusing or interesting. “Fuck” in and of itself isn’t offensive or hardcore, it’s just juvenile and dopey if it’s not used creatively. Then again, when one of the characters declared his son was “dumber than a box of shit”, I literally laughed out loud, so chances are I don’t know what I’m talking about. I guess what I’m saying is give the swearing some context, motherfuckers.

There are also some problems with Ubisoft’s updates. I downloaded the 1.06 update, and as soon as I did, my Gold Edition DLC vanished. I had a few weapons that were DLC exclusive, that I paid real money for, and they ended up just disappearing with the update. Not cool, especially when you’re just about to take on Joseph Seed at the end of the main storyline.

Despite these relatively minor drawbacks, the game as a whole is a blast to play. What I love most about FC 5 at the end of the day is how fun it is. That sounds simple, but redefining a fun video game in this day and age takes skill and thought. “Fun” can be a balancing act, and a lot of developers get lost and what’s too real. To give you an example, one very simple aspect of FC 5 I love the most is that you can sprint across the landscape without losing stamina. One thing that has always bugged me about video games is a stamina meter, always tracking your level of energy. It’s a fucking video game, it doesn’t have to be THAT real! Yes, give me realism with the trees and cars and sky and water and facial animations -- that’s what we want. But a stamina meter? Fuck off! This is what the developers of FC 5 understand the most, and that’s what makes this game so damn playable.

But what of the ending? When the credits rolled, I couldn’t help but think that a lot of players will have a real problem with the way it concludes, and I’m sure the game developers knew this. Personally, I was extremely impressed with the way the game leaves us. It was absolutely not what I was expecting, and actually made me think about its message long after I turned off my console. How often does that happen in video games? I think Americans in particular will have a problem with the ending given that there is very little, if any, resolution. What will bother a lot of Americans, I’m guessing, is the way the game taunts the flag-waving, gun-toting, bible-thumping culture that is more prevalent than ever in the US. The end of the game essentially tells us that no matter how much we resist, no matter the level of our intellectualism, and no matter the strength of our character as individuals, we will always be outnumbered by the braindead sheep, dooming ourselves for failure. Now that’s a message worth chewing on. As an atheist, this is the spin I give the game, and I’m sure a religious person will spin it another way. The way I see it, the FC 5 writing team make a ballsy move in regard to the ending, and I applaud them for the decisions they make. In all great art, it comes down to choice and interpretation, and if all people approve of the artistic gesture, then the message has failed. Some people will hate this ending, and that’s nothing but a good thing. Joseph Seed also bears more than just a passing resemblance to David Koresh as well, and I encourage anyone who’s never heard this name to Google him right now. When you put games in the right framework, those emotional connections follow, ya see.

So what has FC 5 and FCP done for me in terms of finally lighting a fire under my ass and inspiring me to play my FC 2 disc that I’ve had for nine years? Well, I just purchased FC 4, and I’m about to download the classic edition of FC 3, included with my Gold Edition Season Pass. I have removed FC 2 from its box, and placed it on my TV stand where I can no longer ignore it. This will be the summer of Far Cry for me, and I can no longer put off its brilliance. I guess nine is my lucky number.

Final Score: 9/10

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usamotorscycle-blog · 8 years ago

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AltRider Taste Of Dakar Adventure Ride

There I was standing in the middle of nowhere, watching my riding partner, certifiable Glamis Dunes freak Scott Shaffstall, have a blast while skiing one of our shiny Honda Africa Twins in some sand dunes in the middle of nowhere in Southern Nevada during AltRider’s 2017 Taste of Dakar adventure ride.

AltRider’s 2017 Taste of Dakar weekend threw every kind of desert terrain imagineable at the 100+ participants who attended. The event is bucket-lister for real adventure-touring enthusiasts. “That looks pretty cool,” I said. “Let me get out my camera, and I’ll shoot some pics of you.” Shaffstall looped around one time, came blazing down the face of a dune and… promptly high-sided, planting himself deeply in the fluffy medium, cracking the Twin’s fairing, tweaking the bars and messing up his right leg in the process. The moral of the story: Never tell someone you’re going to a shoot a photo of them in sand dunes in the middle of nowhere. Fortunately, the damage to both man and machine were not terminal, and we were able to continue our Taste of Dakar adventure. If you’ve never heard of it, Taste of Dakar is one hell of a fun little desert suarez put on by the folks at AltRider, a Seattle-based manufacturer of hardcore parts and accessories for adventure-touring enthusiasts who actually use their motorcycles off-road. Accordingly, Taste of Dakar is not your average fun run. The goal is to give the participants as much varied terrain as possible, with off-road segments ranging from high-speed fire roads to sections that are nearly impassable – and this year some of them were completely impassable due to snow in the higher elevations. AltRider’s underlying message here is that riding an adventure-touring machine on pavement all day, every day, is a waste of time, and company CEO Jeremy LeBreton has been guiding Taste of Dakar with that philosophy for six years.

Ever wondered which Africa Twin is better, the one with the dual-clutch tranny or the old-school manual? We did, too. Stay tuned to discover our findings. “It’s funny because we had to actually look at it and ask ourselves, ‘What year is this and how many years has this been going?” LeBreton said. “Time has flown by, and I’m really glad it’s working as well as it is. Sometimes it can be quite stressful, but then, hey, you get it done and what an amazing experience, from Kellon to the guy getting his face sewn up on the table. What a great time, and in the end it is also bringing the industry up, even my competitors.” That’s okay, says LeBreton, who has always viewed Taste of Dakar and other AltRider-sponsored rides, such as the Hoh Rainforest Ride near AltRider’s and Conserve The Ride in the woods of Pennsylvania as more of call to action than just an event to promote his company.

AltRider CEO Jeremy LeBreton is one of the most enthusiastic off-road riders you will ever meet, and he is passionate about his “call to action” to get more ADV riders to experience off-road riding. That’s what Taste of Dakar is all about. “We are not an events company,” LeBreton said. “We do these events because we need to get more people on their bikes. The industry fails miserably at it. The industry needs to step its game up, the companies with the resources and the revenue. We need support from the OEMs. Motorcycles are a sustainable cool. Look, I’d love to tell you what AltRider does is magic, unobtainable and unable to be recreated, but I’ve watched my competitors start doing rides like these, and the OEMs should be doing rides like these. We should all be doing this at a much higher level.” Taste of Dakar actually began in 2012 in Shoeshone, Nevada, before switching locations to Pahrump, Nevada, for the next four years. This year, the event switched locations again, moving to the even more remote “old west” ghost town of Gold Point, Nevada, population five! That’s not a typo. Gold Point has five permanent residents. There’s a post office and a saloon, and a whole lot other 1880s-era buildings, along with a bunch of abandoned vehicles and ancient mining equipment, and that’s about it. So when the 100 or so Taste of Dakar participants showed up, coming from places as far away as Sweden, they created a rush hour the likes of which Gold Point probably hasn’t seen in centuries.

Gold Point, Nevada, was the location of the 2017 Taste of Dakar event. The town has a population of just five residents! “This place is great,” LeBreton said. “Logistically, making the move was very difficult, and it took a lot of coaxing to get this town to host us. They hear the word motorcycles, and it is not a positive thing. But now they’re onboard. The feel here is way better. The routes we are going to be able to do out of here are way better. As far as I’m concerned, this is our new home.” The reason for the move was simply because Taste of Dakar is about experiencing new terrain, whether you are first-time off-road rider or a seasoned veteran, and the Pahrump location was pretty much tapped when it came to previously untraversed terrain. By contrast, the Gold Point location was practically untouched, offering endless miles of mining roads, two-track and single-track trails that ran through the desert. Shaffstall and I arrived on Friday evening, just in time to be the last guys in line for dinner and just before the featured presentation of the evening, a talk with former factory KTM rally rider Kellon Walch, who entertained the crowd with many humorous tales of his exploits in the Dakar Rally. “We were in a sandstorm in the dunes for, like, six or seven hours,” Walch said, spinning one of his many yarns. “You couldn’t see where you were going at all. Then all of a sudden I come over this dune, and there’s this local Tuareg just standing there, watching us go by. We were in the middle of nowhere, and I have no idea where he came from or where he was going. He was just… there. It scared the crap out of me because I didn’t expect to see anyone.” Taste of Dakar offers riders a chance at camaraderie. Riders leave in groups on the GPS-led ride, which helps to keep things safe in case of a mechanical mishap or worse. Riders are seriously encouraged not to try and take on the 150- to 180-mile routes on their own. During his talk, Walch used one of his Dakar Rally stories to more or less underscore the point.

Dakar veteran and former factory KTM rally racer Kellon Walch was the featured guest at the 2017 Taste of Dakar. Walch entertained the crowd with stories from his years of racing in Africa and South America. “I had been following Giovanni Sala all day, and we came into this one area where he had to stop for gas. I was just following him, so I really didn’t know exactly where we were. We pull in, and he says to the French guys who were there, ‘We need gas!’ They only give him about two gallons and say, ‘That’s it. There is no more.’ He said. ‘We need more!’ He’s a big, old Italian guy. So he just takes the gas can from the French guy and starts filling up. I said. ‘Hey, what about me?’ Do I need more gas?’ And he just walks back to me and starts filling my bike up too. That’s the cool thing about Dakar. When you get there, it’s all competitive, and in the end it just becomes a game of survival.” Walch also alluded to the gamesmanship that can take place in the big race. When he rode the Dakar, riders were only allowed to make one motor change during the event. “You are only allowed to have one extra motor,” Walch said. “They take the motor, and they know the serial numbers and they mark it with paint – you know how the French are. I had already changed motors, and I was on my second motor, and it blew up. I was just left sitting there. But it just so happens that KTM has a truck entered in the race, one of those big dump truck-style trucks that you see. In that truck are three KTM mechanics, and they also carry a spare motor with some of the serial numbers filed off it. And they have that same paint. KTM probably wouldn’t like anyone to know that. Anyway, they changed my motor out. But I lost about five or six hours that day, and basically after that, my rally was over.”

Dakar participants were able to get up close and personal with Walch’s mothballed factory KTM Dakar bike, which was on display at Taste of Dakar all weekend. Eric Hall has been organizing the routes for the Taste of Dakar since last year when he took over for Jimmy Lewis, and for 2017 he laid out some fantastic routes for the participants to enjoy. “The goal was to pretty much offer a scenic route with, very easy roads that are not going to give you any trouble , and an intermediate route that can get kind of gnarly but isn’t really super advanced,” Hall said. “Then there is the Advanced route, which really takes a smaller bike to negotiate. We scout them out, paint a bunch of tracks with Google Maps, and then we have to come out here to find out what is rideable and what isn’t, because we don’t know what is locked or on private land. Three of us came out for three days and we covered 380 miles a day over the three days to come up with the routes. We didn’t know this area at all. We knew Pahrump because we had ridden around there for the past five years. Initially I was a little concerned because we thought people would think it was too easy. But when the snow melted it got a lot sandier, and it provided that adventure and that challenge that people were looking for.” While the last thing AltRider wants is a group of disgruntled riders whose bikes are bashed beyond repair at the end of the ride, Taste of Dakar’s routes are challenging enough to entertain without being too difficult to navigate or negotiate for those who are honest about their skill levels and choose the appropriate route. Both Shaffstall and I were gung-ho to take on the Advanced route, but when we heard that it would be traversing through the nearby mountains, which were still capped in snow, and the routes might not be passable, we decided to use discretion and take on the Intermediate route, which at 180 miles was also the longest.

The chow line for breakfast on ride day. The food was plain but plentiful. After a hearty breakfast that included eggs, pancakes, bacon, sausage, potatoes, fruit and various other yummies – all food for the weekend is part of the AltRider ticket package – our group of six saddled up to head out on the ride. Only, we didn’t get going so quickly because one poor kid from Oregon who had elected to ride a KTM 300 two-stroke could not get it to fire up. He banged away on the electric starter, kicked it mercilessly, had others help him try and bump start it, all to no avail. After what seemed like his 1,000th kick, he turned to us and said, “You guys should just go.” And then he proceeded on to kick 1,001 whereby the KTM roared to life as if nothing had ever been wrong. Karma. So off we went. The early part of our route included a kick-ass two-track road that snaked down a long wash in an expansive canyon. The dirt was perfect, and Shaffstall and I had tons of fun brake-sliding around corners and banging the big yet nimble Africa Twins off the berms that lined the edge of the road. Eventually, we climbed out of the wash to the site of an expansive valley that ran in all directions. That would be our playground for the next few hours. Sadly, the KTM kid’s ride would be over almost before it started when he realized there was no way he could make it to the gas stop in Tonopah. Bummer.

Taste of Dakar officials insist that no one take on the event alone. Our group consisted of six riders. Smaller groups make it easier to negotiate the routes promptly as well as safely. Traversing roads and sandy sections, we eventually came to what had to be the world’s longest pole line road, which was as wide as an eight-lane freeway and about as smooth. Despite the heavy dust due to the dry conditions, we raced on for what seemed like an hour but was more like 20 minutes to cover the distance to the next transfer section. Then it was more two-track that led to an open expanse of desert with the most majestic sand dune plopped right in the middle of it, almost for no reason at all. Naturally, it was a worth a closer look. With the dry conditions, the dunes were practically of flour-like consistency, but that didn’t stop our group from having a good time ripping around in them. Everybody ate it at least once. Our ride leader actually managed to biff twice, making us a little nervous that he might actually hurt himself and not be able to continue his Moses role and lead us back out of the desert. But it was all good.

As the morning swept by into early afternoon, we continued to enjoy scenic mountains, beautiful rock formations and even wildlife. Shaffstall was absolutely enamored with a group of wild mustangs that we came across while riding a fun two-track road in the main valley where the ride took place. The desert is such a beautiful place, and seeing it from the saddle of competent adventure-touring rigs like the Africa Twins we were astride is truly the best way to see a lot of it in a single day. Eventually, we came to the town of Tonopah, a rather bustling metropolis when compared to the other tiny hamlets that dot the region. We happily wolfed down some pretty decent barbecue at a joint called the Tonopah Brewing Co. As the name implies, it’s just the place to visit if you are well-versed in the hops. However, drinking and riding is a bad choice at best, and at worse a deadly combination, so we stuck with ice tea and soft drinks but made a mental note to someday make a return trip to sample Tonopah Brewing’s craft brews, which teased us with names such as Stinkeye Porter, Half-Life Hefeweizen and Frail Sister Pilsner.

Our lunch stop took place at the Tonopah Brewing Co., in Tonopah, Nevada. Since we couldn’t drink, we plan to get back someday to experience its array of craft brews. From there, we gassed up for the return portion of the loop. The afternoon portion of the ride was much like the morning. The scenery was breathtaking as our group meandered back toward the steak dinner that was awaiting us in Gold Point. The only bummer for the rest of the day was that our group leader made a small navigational error that took us the wrong way down the world’s longest pole line road again, so we had to double back all the way to the other end of it. It was at this time that I decided to throw a little caution to the wind and really stretch the legs of the manual-shift Africa Twin. Bags and all, I saw 110 mph indicated for most of the stretch back down the road, and even then the ride felt like it still took about 10 minutes of riding at that sustained speed to get from end to end. It was late afternoon when we could see the small buildings of Gold Point across the valley from the mountains we were traversing. While the group decided to make one last photo stop, I made an executive decision to take a different route that would keep me off the paved highway section that lead back into town. Instead of going left, I clearly took the road less traveled, and it turned out to be the best part of the ride as I found myself headed down a sandy two-track that had maybe two, maybe three tire tracks from other bikes on it all weekend. The rutted route took me through some of the most awesome Joshua Trees I had ever seen. Unfortunately, I was back on the Africa Twin that didn’t have saddlebags, so I missed a great photo op.

Headed back to Gold Point! As the sun became golden and the shadows grew long, I arrived back in Gold Point just a few minutes ahead of my group. The ride was over, but it was the kind of ride that you wish would never end. In fact, a lot of the Taste of Dakar participants were so enthralled with the area that many elected to stay for a couple more days and explore even more of it. That’s a testament to just how awesome the Southern Nevada desert really is. Dinner that night was a real celebration. The camaraderie of the event was in full force as the AltRider crew solicited stories from the day and then handed out some pretty awesome prizes for a number of categories, such as hard luck, biggest crash (no one was injured) and longest haul to the event. It was fun to listen to people share their experiences, which is why LeBreton has continued to not only organize Taste of Dakar, but also plans to expand the number of AltRider rides to include possibly up to six events around the globe. “We want to do one in the UK, and I want to get one in Romania,” LeBreton said. “And then look at the enthusiasm of the Canadians. Some of them who came down here want to talk to us about doing a ride in Canada as well, so we’ll be talking to them.” “I don’t consider myself to be a prideful guy,” LeBreton added. “But I have these mentors who have said to me, ‘Jeremy, all these years later, you’re keeping it going.’ We have to keep it going.”

Nothing like hanging out with your friends and swapping tales of your riding adventures. They did it all night at Taste of Dakar. At the end of the day, even genuine Dakar Rally veteran Walch said he was impressed with the Taste of Dakar event. “Honestly, I really didn’t know much about it before this year,” Walch said. “Everyone involved is just a good group of guys. They are all enthusiastic about riding in the desert. I had a great time. Everyone here had a great time. I know this area really well. I live in Alamo , and Gold Point is a lunch stop for me. So next year I’m going to help with some routes that I know, and it should be really good. I am excited!”

Sharla Carstars (left) drove down all the way from Edmonton, Alberta, Canada, with her friends to experience Taste of Dakar. She was one of eight women riders to take on the event. One of just eight women riders among the over 100 participants was, Sharla Carstars of Edmonton Alberta, Canada. Carstars may have been on the most unique bike in the event, a Honda CB500X equipped with an aftermarket upgrade kit from Rally Raid. The kit includes new rims and upgraded suspension that adds two inches of travel. Carstars raved about her Taste of Dakar experience. “This was my second day of adventure riding, ever” Carstars said. “It was difficult, but it was really good. The sand was way harder than I thought it would be. It was tough, but it was a lot of fun – go big or go home, I guess. It was a little tricky with the routes with the GPS. It was off a couple times, but the route was good and the organization was good. It was nice to have that camaraderie with other people. I would come back.”

Chris McInroy got a one-of-a-kind experience at Taste of Dakar after a close encounter with his BMW’s windshield punched a hole in his face. But the best story of the 2017 Taste of Dakar weekend is the last one we’ll tell. Another Canadian, Chris McInroy, truly had a one-of-a-kind experience at the event on BMW R1200GS Adventure. “This was my first Taste of Dakar and my first time being off-road, and it was my first time tasting a windshield,” McInroy said. “I was coming around a 120-degree corner, really shitty stuff, really loose gravel. I gave her the beans to try and keep her straight, but she threw me into the side of the berm. My hand slipped off the bars, and I ate the windshield and dropped the bike. When I got up, I knew my face was leaking. I know what blood tastes like. I’m from Canada and I’ve played hockey .”

Under the light of a lantern, on a rickety wooden table outside the saloon, a doctor who was attending the event sewed McInroy’s face back together. After arriving back in camp, McInroy’s friends realized that the wound above his upper lip was more serious than what was first thought. It just so happened that among the participants on the ride were two doctors. A suture kit was obtained, and McInroy was laid on a rickety wooden table outside the saloon to have his face stitched up under the light of a lantern in the cool Nevada night while a score of observers watched the whole thing. Vodka proved to be the anesthetic of both choice and necessity, and the doctors got to work. A few stitches later, McInroy looked like a different man, save for the swelling, which would be mostly gone by morning. “These were my first stitches,” McInroy said. “I’m glad I could have them on a wooden table in a deserted ghost town by a doctor who does circumcisions.”

All patched up! AltRider Taste of Dakar 2017!

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