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heartsick-honeybee · 2 years ago

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a Jervis Tetch AU background story.

Oqueso beforehand: I am a RPer.. I am not a writer and I am not good at writing outside of RP, so I am sorry if this isn't great or seems rushed or rambly.

It's because it probably is.

I just had an idea for an AU Jervis background story and went and wrote it. SO yeah

Basically a really long Jervis Tetch background trauma dump. Sorry about that.

ANYWAY...

Story.

Their life had been nearly perfect.

Henry Tetch and Winifred Beauden were both from privileged families.

Both of their families had made a significant contribution to Allied victory in the Second World War.

The Tetch family was well known for their involvement in high-level military intelligence, while the Beauden's family was renowned for their groundbreaking work in medical science. Both said to have saved hundreds of thousands of lives.

As a result, both were very prominant families.

After the war, fate had it that the two families (who had never previously been acquainted.) had found their respective home of their dreams each in the same beautiful English countryside. They became neighbors.

The wives of each of the families, Victoria Tetch and MaryAnne Beauden became fast friends, and eventually even became pregnant with their first children same time.

Henry and Winifred had been close ever since they were born.

Now, it was important to know that these two women, despite being the closest of friends, were two very different women.

Victoria, of course, being the proud wife of such an important militant officer, was a very old fashioned sort of woman. She kept things clean and organized. She felt a woman's place was to manage the househome duties and to support her husband. She wore high collared modest clothing, and her hair always pulled up in a tight bun, which MaryAnne always told her made her prominant overbite stand out far more than was necessary.

She was a no-nonsense type of woman, though she had her weakness-- particularly for gossip.

MaryAnne on the other hand was the entirely opposite sort of woman.

While her husband was still the more prominant doctor, she herself was a nurse.

Victoria often reprimended her for this. "It is at least a woman's job, but now that you're having a child, don't you think you should stop this "working" thing and spend your time in the home?" she would often tell her.

She would only lightheartedly laugh this off.

MaryAnne was a modern sort of woman. Besides working, she loved to wear her hair down, long wavy gold locks abundant. She loved the modern types of clothes.. much loser dresses, shorter, more low cut collars, often bare foot, happy to lie on the grass under their big willow tree-- the type of woman who'd eventually have earned the name "Hippie."

In addition to this, she was very lax with her household. She cooked and cleaned.. but simply not in the traditional way.. not formally.. not even all of the time. Instead of keeping the house,

She prefered to focus on her own hobbies-- Painting and reading.

Victoria always called MaryAnne a Romantic.

Maryanne always called Victoria a Square.

They were the best of friends.

They were, however, as said before-- very different women

and very different women raise their kids very differently.

Now when they were babies, it wasnt so different. THe two women would get together daily for tea, and the children would play together. As they got older, however, is where things diverged.

They remained close, however…

Maryanne raised Winnie just the way youd expect… a free spirit. a wild child, strong and smart and romantic. When she was young she had the freedom to explore, to learn, and to grow. She had really very little structure-- family dinners, for example, were unlikely in lieu of eating whatever was there and fending for herself. She could explore and play as she pleased, and was not overly bothered with school, only made to go as it was necessary, and focussing only on what she'd liked most-- much like her mother, finding herself absolutely in love with reading.

Henry of course was raised as you'd expect in a old-fashioned type of military household.

They were strict with his studies… strict with his bedtime. Strict with his cleaning and his schedule.

His duties came before all else. He would be reprimended for the smallest of things… dirty nailbeds, his books being out of alphabetical order-- The normal sort of military mindset, normal of the time, but simply never meant for a child.

Now, Henry did have SOME freedoms.

As their families were both neighbors with large amounts of acreage, so long as his duties and responsibilities were completed, and especially when his father was home, he was often encouraged to spend time OUTSIDE, away from the house-- so not to be bothersome.

These were Henry's favorite times, as he'd happily escape into the green lands behind their home, and off to the nearby stream.

This stream was one of Winifred's favorite places. From a young age she was allowed to wander-- to explore and grow. She was always waiting for him there.

"Henry~!" She'd always greet with a warm smile.

As they'd grown, Winifred had grown beautiful, just like her mother.

She was incredibly petite and pale… but she had the brightest blue eyes, and wavy gold locks that fell a mess everywhere. She'd be laxed, her bare feet dangling in the water, a book in her hands.

Henry was incredibly enamored with her, and she with him-- though he didn't understand it.

Henry was an average height, but ever so slightly overweight, which he was self conscious of, though his mother insisted he was "Well fed."

He had dark hair, deeply tanned skin, and dark eyes… he wore glasses, and had prominant large bulbous nose and his mothers ridiculously buck teeth. He was precisely what you'd imagine the sterotypical nerd of the time to look like. Always "Properly" dressed, often in dress shirts, with a bow tie and a pocket protector with pens.

He hated it. He felt ridiculous, but Winifred always reassured him.

"Winnie." He'd greet nervously in return. "You brought a book-- will you read to me again?"

He'd ask every day, despite him knowing the answer.. to which she'd always smile.

"Always." She'd agree.

"Mother won't ever let me read those sort of books. She says theyre nonsensical and I should be spending my time studying.." He'd tell her quietly, and she'd smile and shake her head. "Your mother is a codfish." She'd quote peterpan playfully.. patting the ground beside her. "Come sit, I'll read." She'd say surely.

She'd lay down a blanket she'd bring just for him-- the poor boy so afraid of getting in trouble for being dirty he'd never once sit on the grass.. unable to even bring his own blanket to sit upon for fear his mother would find IT dirty and he'd be in trouble. He'd always check, and check, and double check three times to make sure it was clean enough before sitting, and settling in to listen to her stories--.

It was his favorite thing in the world.

She would read him all kinds of stories.. from the classics to romance and anything she could get her hands on… her favorite books, however, were those Old Westerns and anything about the Americal South. Her favorite book, in particular, being "Christy" by Catherine Mashall. a Book about a 19 year old woman from the city who'd come to the Appalachians to help educate the people there, only to learn their ways and appreciate the beauty of the mountain people.

Since it was her favorite book, she had read it many times to Henry.. and it had become his favorite as well.

Today was one of those days, she was just finishing the story for what must have been the fourt or fifth time. He smiled warmly as she finished.. covering his mouth as he did.

"What are you covering your mouth for?" Winifred asked curiously.

Henry frowned. "Mother says that smiling is nonsensical. Besides.. I look ridiculous anyway with these.. teeth." He hissed as though they were some sort of curse.

Winnie only smiled warmly, sliding up and kissing his cheek, making him blush all over.

"I like your teeth, Henry.

Your MOTHER is nonsensical!" She declared surely, leaning into him lightly.

"When we are grown, we should move far far away.. where your mother has no say so."

"To the appalachians?" Henry asked with a warm laugh.

"Why not?" She chimed brightly.

Of course… they were only childish fancies.. but then. What separates a childish fancy from reality spare for action?

The two as they grew only grew closer. They were very much in love, and as soon as they were old enough, they were wed.

Winifred Beuden had become Winifred Tetch

And Henry and Winifred Tetch set off the exact same day for Elizabethton, Tennessee.

It was perfect. Everything they had hoped for. It was a historical town, and it looked just how she had imagined. Beautiful and at the base of the appalachians--

And Winifred and Henry, with their comfortable financial status' of their families, quickly found the perfect home as well. An old, quite large, wooden-and-brick two-story turn-of-the-century home.

It was Everything They'd dreamed of.

Their lives were perfect.

And their perfect life soon only came with more wonderful news… as only a few months after, Winnie was pregnant with their first child.

The two were ecstatic… and nine months later they gave birth to a baby boy.

"He has my nose." Henry IMMEDIATELY sighed in defeat, only making Winnie laugh warmly."

And its just as adorable on him as it is on you. He's perfect."

"At least he has your hair." He mumbled in defeat, but smirked softly.

"What are we to name him?" He asked sweetly, and she smiled softly.

"I like the name Jervis…" Winifred answered gently.

"Jervis..?" He repeated lightly, raising a brow in surprise. "You mean Jarvis? Gervase?"

Winifred shook her head surely.

"Jervis is a version of those. Like Jervis Bay in Wales-- but it sounds more… American. Like… he belongs here." She said surely, if not a bit dreamily.

"JER-vis." He quoted in an American accent-- causing them both to laugh.

"Jervis Tetch. I like it." He said surely.

"Tetch is SO unamerican." SHe sighed and laughed too, Kissing him sweetly.

And so.. Jervis Tetch was born.

As Jervis grew.. he was an absolute Mama's boy if there ever was one.

Winifred ADORED her little son. He was sweet and shy.. attached to her at the hip at all times.

"Winnie~" Henry would greet as he came home from work, kissing her own the lips. Only to have the small blonde boy sulk and crawl onto his moms lap, clinging to her with a pout.

"Mummy~" Hed whine.. making his father sulk.. to which Winnie would answer sweetly and patiently.

"He's only a boy, My Henry. Don't you pout so." She'd comfort warmly.

Any new family with a new child will know this to be true: When a child is involved, you simply dont have the same amount of time together as you'd had before….

When the child is clingy, that is even more true.

Jervis was the most clingy of children. The most sweet and loving of children.

He loved his mother more than anything in the world, and nearly never let her go. At least… until just after the boy had turned four years old.

It had seemed Henry at SOME point had at least got SOME time with his beloved Winifred.. because at this time is when they found out that they were having their second child.

Winnie Tetch was pregnant, and again, they were ecstatic.

"Mummy has a baby in there?" Jervis asked, touching her tummy.

The boy had the most impossibly high pitched voice, and the biggest baby blue eyes that gazed up at his mother like a pup.

"SHe does. Your little sister." She said surely.

"Will she like me?" The boy inquired worriedly.

"She will love you." Winifred assured.

And she did.

Later that year, Winifred gave birth to her second child:

Fairlight Tetch. Named after one of the main characters from her favorite book… the one that had originally inspired her, "Christy."

Jervis immediately adored his little sister and Henry found her to be perfect. She too had her mothers blue eyes and blonde hair, but also got her perfect nose-- which won her fathers immediate approval.

With this year, however.. came something else that was new.

Jervis's first year at school. With this came some issues, buried… and unexpected.

Sadly, the issue isn't what you may think.

Now… we know well Jervis had his fathers large nose.. well you'd well-to-know if you've ever heard of Jervis Tetch, you know well that as his adult teeth began to come in, he too, had the Tetch Family's large overbite.. so you may think perhaps the issue lies in bullying. Right?

Well. You'd not be wrong to think kids could be cruel-- but this did not bother Jervis. He was very much a Beauden at heart. A free spirited romantic, lofty and passive.

Their words didnt bother him much at all. Not really. Neither did the lack of friends.

He'd much rather sit under a tree and look at picture books-- Later read.

Or talk to the cat belonging to one of the neighbors that lived near the school that had often wandered to the playground.

He'd watch the caterpillars eat leaves, and keep track of the crysalises that formed.

He found happiness in his own interests. and so the other children never bothered him much.

No… the problem came in the form of. Henry. His father.

When Henry left England, he had done so entirely with the intent on leaving his Father and Mother behind. But unfortunately some things are harder to forget.

From the way he was raised, Henry had something that in modern times we now know well as trauma-induced OCD.

It manifested in many ways.

It always had shown in small ways. The way he'd check things for cleanliness, every time. WHen he was young, the blanket Winnie would lie down for him. As he got older he did it with dishes, with showering, with putting things away. It wasn't hugely problematic.. but it was noticeable.

If someone else, for example, a young Jervis, had put something away, His father would check it.. and check it again, and once more. He HAD to it seemed, or he'd stress himself into a frenzy.

But it didnt really become an issue until Jervis started school.

"He HAS to study more. He spends all of his time playing-- if he doesn't study his grades will fall."

He'd fret to Winnie, who'd quelm his worries. "And so what if they do, dear? We are well off. He is a smart boy-- He is fine. We are fine." She'd always assure him. But it was so ingrained from his parents and the words theyd always repeat to him as a child. "And what if there is another war, Winifred? Our money will be worth NOTHING. We will lose everything, and he's not the skills to survive!" "Henry!" She'd stop him over and over again. "He is only five, my love. We are in America now. And we will be fine. He will be fine.

He will be fine.

Jervis heard that every time his parents ever argued. They never USED to argue.. and why was it ALWAYS about HIM? He hated it so… he always felt like it was his fault..

Sometimes he'd apologize.. but his parents always told him it wasn't.

"It's not your fault, Jervis… go off to play."

Of course, as he got older, the compulsions seemed to get worse.. But Winifred helped Henry through it, calm and patient as she ever was. And He'd give into her as he always had. They'd come to a solution, and there was a compromise.

From Second Grade on, once grades did begin to matter moreso,

Jervis had to put his studies first every day when he got home. Appease his father by studying. But only within reason. and with plenty of time for him also to play and explore. It was not bad, not at all.

It was a very balanced sort of childhood. For the time, all was well.

Jervis was not an unintelligent child… not by any means. In fact, he was quite the opposite.

He was bright as could be. He was imaginative, he read very well above the expected level for his age, and he loved to make his parents proud. He worked hard, and for the most part succeeded…

Minus a very small issue.

It seemed that every now and again… Jervis would just sort of… zone out during class. He'd space at times, it was noticed.

It was especially surveyable when he was looking at picture books. It was noticed by his teachers that sometimes he would stay on the same page for far too long-- even perhaps hours if he were allowed..

He'd just gaze into the picture relentlessly.. almost unblinking.

Sometimes he'd twist his fingers, or bite his lip, or some other form of stim. But just… stare at it-- presumably daydreaming-- lost in his own head in some unimaginable concept entirely inspired by nothing more than the unmoving picture.

It was at this time his teacher had called a conference with Henry and Winifred to express their concerns.

Jervis was put through some tests and some observations following this point.

Eventually.. he was diagnosed with two things. Attention Deficit Disorder, or ADD, and High Functioning Autism.

Of course, back then, these things werent well understood. Henry was understandably distraught, worried about what sort of future he could have with such issues.

Winifred naturally comforted him, and the doctor they'd been refered to for the observations explained that the Autism wasnt some sort of death sentance… that despite it making him a little different, some autistic children even had some talents that "Normal" children didnt. Such as remembering dates and times with ease, or other languages. She recommended perhaps putting him into some extracurricular activities and seeing if any resignated with him. In addition the doctor explained that the ADD could likely be helped with therapy.. and if it couldnt… that they had medication that would help.

Of course, when they'd gone home, this once again had started a fight among his parents.

"He'll have to work harder, three, four, five times as hard as other children! He has to LEARN to act normal, Winifred! Its for his own good, for his FUTURE."

Of course, Winnie denied but comforted as she always did. "There is nothing wrong with the way he is, Henry. That is your parents speaking through you. The same parents we left behind…

It's such an archaic way of thinking. He is different-- there is nothing wrong with different. Different people are the future, my love. Give him a chance." She urged..

Henry of course was reluctant.. his own compulsions eating at him. But he loved his wife dearly, and gave in, letting it drop.

Jervis himself sighed, curling up in his room with his head on his knees.

Fairlight, however, giving him a push. "Jervy, play with me!" Fairlight chimed, her big blue eyes batting at her brother, her chin on his knees.

Jervis pouted.. not speaking.

This was something that was common for Jervis-- when he got upset he'd just go silent and not speak at all. Fairlight, four years old at this time, was used to this.

Over the years, Jervis's attachment to his mother, throughout his parents constantly argueing over HIM, had transferred to his little sister.

She was his best friend.

She was perfect. Just like dad said, she was everything he wasnt.

But he wasn't jealous.. not at all. He was just so glad. He didnt want her to ever be bullied like he was. He didnt want their father ever to be disappointed in her like he was with him. It would break his heart-- He wanted her to be happy. He wanted her life to be perfect. Just like she was.

His perfect baby sister, his best friend. The only one who never judged him. Never mocked him, never thought less of him.

She loved him unconditionally, and he loved her.

Fairlight pouted at his silence, and stuck her bottom lip out dramatically, just shaking him more. "Big Brother, please? Ill cry!"

Of course. that worked every time.. Jervis's face faultered slightly. "Oh.. no no, Dont cry, Fairlight. Okay… okay I'll play. WHat do you want to play? Blocks? Xylophone?" He offered a soft smile, tapping on her little toy instrument suggestingly.

"NO! I'm not a baby, Jervis!" She insisted, pouting cutely with her hands on her hips.

"I want to play Alice in Wonderland." She declared surely, with a bright smile.

"What? Alison Wonderland? Is… that a rock and roll band?" Jervis pouted a little disapprovingly. Despite getting many of his mothers traits, he held his fathers distaste for the modern music movement of the time.

"NO! Alice IN wonderland! like the Disney movie!" She pouted insistantly.

"Oh… is that… its the one with the purple cat, right?" He asked unsurely, Her lighting up.

"YES thats the one. and I will be Alice." She said brightly.

"Of course. and… I'm the cat?" He asked sweetly.

"Oh NO. You're the MAD HATTER." SHe said surely, Taking one of their mother's dressing-hats and plopping it on Jervis's head… which swallowed him entirely.

"The MAD HATTER? But I don't even like hats. and he was ENTIRELY unpleasant." Jervis frowned, pulling the dressing-hat up to where he could see.

"Now then. Alice is studying.. and she is sooo tired of studying cus its so BORING. so she falls asleep and wakes up in wonderland where everything is WONDERFUL and she doesnt have to study EVER again.

Jervis had to laugh. "Youve not even started school yet. What do you know about studying? Perhaps I should be Alice!" He teased, but always gave in at her sulking.

Of course… this was the beginning of it. He played pretend to appease his sister.

He didn't even LIKE the hatter. But he liked making his sister happy. and so they'd play, every day.

They'd go out into their mothers garden, and he'd let Fairlight lead, having adventures in the back yard, playing play-pretend--

And not too long later, it was in the library at school, Jervis discovered it.

"Alice in wonderland! It's a book? Just like Fairlight's Favorite!" He gushed happily running to the librarian. "Is this like the Disney Movie?" He asked innocently. The woman smiled to him patiently.

"Even better. It may be a bit difficult for your age, though--" "OH! I read very well for my age, madam." He insisted surely. The woman smiled in return. "Well then you should get "Through the looking glass" as well. Read both books. I hope you'll enjoy them."

And with joy, Jervis took both books, and got right to home.

He was happy to show Fairlight, who was delighted.

"You have to read them to me, you'll read them to me, right Jervis?!" She demanded, of course only met with a big buck-toothed smile.

"I would think of doing nothing else." He said surely.

Of course, Jervis had to do his homework and clean, but as soon as he was done, He and his sister curled up in the garden.. and Jervis began to read to her.

He read to her a little every single day-- right up into bedtime.

He found he liked the books MUCH more than the movie, and was happy to chat long after they were supposed to be asleep. Him leaning down from his bunkbed.

"Did you know, the librarian lady at school told me that Lewis Carrol wrote Alice in wonderland about a real little girl.. Her name was Alice Liddel. She said he'd watch her play.. and he was amazed by how imagintive she was. How she could always amuse herself and make something out of nothing. How she'd talk to the flowers and the caterpillars."

"Just like you!" Fairlight chimed happily."

"Oh no, YOURE Alice, not ME. I'm the Hatter, remember?" He laughed.

He always loved how much Fairlight would light up when he'd call her Alice.. she really did love it so.

"Goodnight, my Alice." He chimed warmly.

She giggled happily. "Good un-daytime, Mad hatter!" She said surely in return.

The two loved eachother very much. Unfortunately.. this didnt last.

They were nearly through the second book, "Through the Looking Glass"

When Jervis had hurried home as he did every day.

"Alice, I'm home! I'll get right on my homework and then we should finish the book this week!" He announced happily.. only to be paused as he slid in, looking around.

"Alice? Fairlight?"

He called out, Winifred shaking her head. "Shhh, Jervis. Fairlight is ill today. She can't play, she needs rest." She assured. Jervis nodded, and smiled. "Oh okay." He said thoughtfully.

"When she wakes up, can I still read to her?" He asked.. and Winifred of course agreed.

When Fairlight woke.. Jervis did read to her.. a little. She was fine just the day before.. but now she had a fever.. She could barely stay awake--. Jervis read a little, but hugged her and kissed her cheek.

"You rest, We can read later, okay? "

"Okay Jervy, I love you big brother. We will play tomorrow, okay?"

"For most certain." He agreed, I love you too, My Alice. Tomorrow then."

Tomorrow.. however… never came.

Fairlight had just gotten so ill so fast… they didn't even have the time to know what had happened.

Jervis was called to the principals office.

WHen they told him that his sister had passed.. he didnt react at all.

He didnt cry at first. He didnt ask questions.

He just went silent.

He was silent for a long time while they talked.

He felt like his face was on fire. He felt numb. It couldnt be real.

When he finally spoke, it was muddled.

"I should go home, I promised Fairlight we would finish the book today…"

The principal immediately looked concerned. "Jervis… Fairlight is… Shes gone. Im sorry."

"She isn't gone. SHe wouldn't leave without finishing the story. She's Alice." He informed them distantly.

Of course… she was gone.

She was gone.

Jervis couldnt believe she was gone.

They never even got.. to finish the book.

She was Alice.. she was the main character.. she couldnt be gone.

This is when the Tetches fell apart.

Winifred had fallen deep into depression.. losing her daughter just sucked the life right out of her… and she had turned this brokeness to Jervis.

She would lift him into her arms just as she had done when he was young, and just hold him for hours at a time.

She paid no attention to Henry anymore.. she couldnt bare to.

And Jervis scarcely was going to school. He couldn't leave her… She was becoming so frail and weak-- just like Fairlight had been.

If he left..

He knew she'd be gone forever if he did.

"Winnie, you need to EAT. You cant do this to me. I ALREADY LOST MY DAUGHTER am I supposed to lose my wife too?! And what about HIM? You think Jervis is going to get by without you?!

He's a freak. He needs his mother!"

Jervis had woken to his father yelling. He frowned deeply.. normally when they fought he'd lock himself in his room. But he just couldn't leave his mother… not now.

She didn't even argue… she just gave her husband a soft distant look.

"Winifred, its NOT romantic to be a Martyr. You need to go on with the LIVING. You can't just follow her!" He snapped, but left the room.

Jervis frowned softly, looking up at his mother.

"is it true…?"

She looked down at him slowly, taking a deep breath, before speaking far too slowly.

"Is what true, My Jervis?"

Jervis frowned a little. "Are you trying to die? Like Fairlight?" He asked with ernest concern.

But Winifred only smiled softly, in a foreign way Jervis didn't recognize.

"I am." She said slowly, but shook her head seeing Jervis's horror.

"Don't be so sad… Jervis. It's like that book you were reading…."

"Like.. our book?" He asked slowly.

Winifred nodded.

"Fairlight is in wonderland now… I'm just… following the white rabbit… to go and find her…" She whispered gently.

"To wonder… Mother, she's DEAD. She's not in wonderland! She died! You'll die!" He argued in a panic, stress in his voice.

She shook her head, however… "Death is just.. another way of reaching the other side of the looking glass. When you go this way.. you can't come back anymore.

I just.. don't want her to be alone."

Jervis frowned deeply.. to him-- it made sense. He knew what death was but.. his autism made him not completely grasp it.. not the way he should have-- and his mother was skewing it. She didn't mean to do harm… but the truth was. She did..

"You will help me… won't you, Jervis?" She whispered softly, Jervis looking up helplessly.

"You don't want to leave Fairlight alone, right? I just.. want to go take care of her… okay?"

Jervis thought about it, but nodded slowly. "Okay. … Just.. How can I help, Mum?"

She took a deep breath. "There are flowers… in the garden bushes… the Oleander.

Fetch them for mother… and we. we will have a tea party.

I will drink the Oleander tea.. and I will follow your sister into Wonderland." She told him surely…

Jervis looked down… he nodded, but looked up helplessly. "I miss her, mother… and.. I will miss you too.. so much. I want to come to WOnderland too--"

"No--" She said quickly, but sighed. "No, Jervis… when you find you way to wonderland… you have to find it through the looking glass.. the one with the way back.. so you can always come back to this world." "I don't need to be in this room if you and Fairlight are there.." he said quickly, but she shook her head. "You have to stay to keep our family alive in this world. You know we are from such prominant families.. You will inheret everything, you will be the one to make us proud. I have faith in you, Jervis. When you find your way through the looking glass.. you will see us again." She answered quickly and surely, stroking his cheek gently. "WHen I am gone.. I promise I will come back to you as the white rabbits, okay? They'll always be a sign of what you need to do, so you'll never be alone. I promise."

Of course… by all technicality.. this was Jervis' first murder.. though no one ever knew the truth besides Jervis himself.. who didnt understand it.

He did what he thought was right… He helped his mom go to find Fairlight… so she wouldnt be alone.

Of course.. Henry found them… Her unconscious with tea in her hand… and Jervis petting her gently, stroking her hair comfortingly.

He didn't think anything suspicious-- she was already in bad shape.. and Jervis-- he knew he was.. off. He just assumed he didnt understand.. he wasnt completely wrong.

He was DISTRAUGHT. and Broken. and from there is when things got… bad.

Of course without Winifred and Fairlight there anymore…

Henry's OCD and compulsions had spiralled out of control.

Jervis was all he had left.. He had to save him. He had to save the family.

What if Winnie's way was wrong? He couldn't take that risk.. not now.

Jervis was forced to study relentlessly. He no longer could play, He no longer had that freedom.

The only think he still was allowed to do was to read… only because his father would forever have a softspot for it-- thanks to his lost love.

As he grew older, of course the boy was praised as being brilliant. He graduated highschool with honors. Jervis had become a much more serious and diligent boy, just as his father had pushed him to.

Despite his electives and extracurriculars in highschool being largely focussed on Classic Literature and the history of such, when he'd gone to college, he'd chosen his Majors not to his own preferences, but instead at his fathers urging and pushing his responsibility to keep their family alive.

Medical Science and Biology, and Technology.

Of course.. it was mentioned long long before that many autistic children had a gift in certain areas.

Well, by matter of chance, they had found that area. Jervis absolutely was considered a genius in his work here.. He had a high ranking job right out of college and was considered unparalelled in his work. He was hired in the big city, in THE Gotham City, and quickly moved there to begin working for Wayne Enterprises.

But as seemed to be a pattern in this poor boys life-- the good couldn't last. Nothing was ever stable.

Jervis at this point, despite having been talented in this area, was overworking himself.

At this point he had been well brainwashed by his father, he had long since forgotten his previous hobbys, and had delved into only his work. He needed to be successful. and there was nothing else.

He was working day and night, constantly-- He would sometimes go days forgetting to eat or sleep, and that-- there inlaid the issue. Because that was what eventually lead to his first hallucination-- and eventually his full schizophrenic break.

Jervis had fallen asleep at his desk.. it wasnt uncommon. and it was quite late when he awoke.. everyone else was already gone from the lab… when he got up, and made his way downstairs, locking up and leaving.

As he was leaving, he was heading to walk home, as he was nearly tripped… by a white rabbit.

At first.. he didnt think twice…. and yet somehow, it hit him all at once. He looked back.. to see a little girl.. running after the rabbit.

The little girl looked-- so familiar somehow.. something about her blonde hair and blue eyes.. and little blue dress. "…Its… impossible… Fairlight?"

"Call me Alice, silly!" She giggled, before turning and running back after the Rabbit….

Almost mindlessly, he followed it. It lead him to a park…

It was late.. so there was no children.

But there was one person… a man.. and he was crying.

Jervis frowned, looking around. He couldn't remember quite how he got there. Wasn't he.. following someone? He was too tired to recall.

"Excuse me… excuse me!" Jervis spoke up.

"Are you alright?" He asked gently as he walked up to the man, he looked up.

"Im sorry.. I didnt know anyone else was here.." The man stood.

"Oh-- Oh nonono… you arent bothering me. Not even a little bit! But you do seem so very… distraught. You are in a park, crying! Perhaps… youd like to talk about it?" Jervis offered.

Ive no where to be-- not really.."

The man and Jervis sat and talked… they talked until daylight broke.

The man was heartbroken.. the story was all too familiar. He had lost his wife and child

This man, however… had lost a son.

"I am so sorry--" Jervis said, almost on impulse, but the man shook his head.

"If I knew.. I would have done things differently.

I worked him so hard. I was so concerned for his grades.. was so worried about school-- none of that matters now. all those straight A's amounted to NOTHING. Hes DEAD and GONE. And all that time I could have been spending with him-- I lost it. Its too late now.

I'd do anything to be with them now--

I just want to be with them."

Jervis frowned deeply. "Sir.. if you're feeling… suicidal-- there are people you can call.. Here you can use my phone--!"

The man shook his head. "Nah… dont worry. I know how it works… or how they say it works. If I off myself-- Ill never see them again-- Ya know? We wont go to the same place."

Jervis thought about it for a moment. "You wont… be able to go to wonderland?" He asked slowly, the man laughing sadly. "Sure. we can say it like that." He said plainly.

Jervis thought hard for a long moment. He was quiet for several minutes before finally speaking.

"Would you like some tea?"

The man looked confused at first. "Wha? I prefer coffee.." He laughed sadly, akwardly, but Jervis gave a soft smile.

"I am English afterall, im sure you can hear it-- I must insist. It will help." He said surely, offering the man his hand as he stood.

The man thought about it… but let him help him up. He followed the shorter man a small distance home.

That night… the small man was finally able to join his family in wonderland. Jervis had helped him.

"Do you understand now..?" Jervis heard a small voice, he turned to see the small girl again, giving him a soft look.

"Yes, Alice.. I understand. I will help him." He said softly.

Jervis packed a small bag… and headed home to Tennessee… Home to see his father.

His father was growing old.. he was a miserable man who never did quite get over the loss of the love of his life.. and though he was proud of Jervis' accomplishments. He'd never let it show… so trapped in "Tough Love"…

Jervis could now see the suffering. The man before had opened his eyes…

Alice wanted him to help him. He would help him. He missed his mother so well.

Jervis had of course made tea for him.. and they sat together and talked…

But he seemed to realize something was wrong.. it was different than the others.. he didnt just fall asleep.. his eyes seemed to have a kind of clarity.

"Jervis… what.. did you do?"

"Its alright father…" He smiled warmly, touching his arm, before hugging him tightly.

"You'll see mom again soon. Youll finally be happy. Alice told me so… Fairlights here to take you."

Jervis said so proudly.. he didnt understand the last look in his fathers eyes.

It would take a long time to truly understand it…

After this, nearly a decade had passed.

On one hand, for a decade, Jervis had been a normal man. He'd worked every day, he'd been successful. He'd not killed anyone-- importantly.

His life seemed to have finally settled into place, although-- his obsession… only grew.

Once he had "helped" his father, the small man was finally at peace. He didnt feel guilted anymore, nor obligation. He finally was free to find the joy in his life… to try to find the looking glass..

And he did.. when he could finally stop and look around him, he found it often, in every day things.

To him, Gotham truly was a wonderland.

The lights that lit the sky at night to him danced like stars singing to him…

The characters very much surounded them,

The flowers sang,

THe walrus was on the news… though for some reason he called himself the penguin? But Jervis didnt question it, he respected all peoples identities!

And in fact he'd just been promoted at work! Head of Hardware development. He was moved to a different department and paired with a new partner.

A snarky, unhappy, but very intelligent man named Edward Nashton.

"Hello, hello! Frabjous day, is it not?!" Jervis greeted with Delight, offering his hand.

The taller man looked him over with scrutinizing eyes, very VERY delicately taking just the tips of his fingers with gloved hands. "…Right…. Lewis Carrol, hm?" He sighed, as Jervis nodded in agreeance.

"OH, You know it?"

"I know ALL the classics. I can't say ive a preference for something so… ABSTRACT, myself. But-- to each their own." He sighed, cleaning his glasses and turning back to the computer screen where he typed away.

"Oh! Well, Its very much my favorite. My little sister introduced me, you know. She is Alice. She always helps me to find the wonderland in everything~" He chimed brightly, proudly bragging as though the girl were still alive, there with him.

Ed just shrugged passively.

"Right. Well. Good on you." He gave a thumbs up carelessly.

"And good luck when that falls apart too." He said back mocking the singsongy voice, waving his hand mildly.

"My well you ARE a sourpuss, arent you?" Jervis sulked.. but got to work.

Of course… as bleak as it may seem. This irritable man eventually came one of Jervis' two dearest friends.

It was not too long after this point the man had had his own break of sorts.. becoming a criminal himself, outright and well known. He'd been open and fearless, and been stopped by-- a man dressed as a bat. Even Jervis thought that was a bit insane. Even in wonderland men didn't dress as bats.

But Jervis admired the man greatly. He had fought for what he believed in, he was guilted into nothing, and he helped… HIMSELF, most importantly. THAT was something Jervis had NEVER done. He was so entirely impressed. Edward had not been arressted that day, but actually gotten away, despite being stopped from his rampage-- Jervis knew the white rabbit would lead him right to him.

He must be insane. What was he doing? Surely he'd lose his job. But-- this life. This was never HIS life. He wanted to follow Alice into wonderland-- Surely Edward's way-- Edwards way was wonderland. To live freely and indugently.

He knew the white rabbit would lead him to Edward.

Edward now called himself the Riddler, didnt he?

Well he would follow in the intelligent man's footsteps.

He was… he was---.

"The Mad Hatter." He heard the small voice, with giggles. which made him smile fondly.

"I am the Mad Hatter." Jervis repeated surely.. following the white rabbit into the night.

#jervis tetch #jervis #tetch #madhatter #mad hatter #batman #rogues #rogues gallery #gotham rogues #gotham

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