#hot dude summer amiright or amiright?!

[tafrus]

i had my two week situationship, now i need 3 months of yearning, pining, and unrequited love to make me truly feel alive

[nerdtronica]

every tmbg album in a nutshell

idc if i skipped albums it's my post my choice

THE PINK ALBUM 1: paranoia??????? 2: puppet heads 3: writer's block 4: i hate my life 5: oh no home invasion 6: why did my gf leave me :( 7: i'm a dad 8: kids with rabies are weird 9: the beatles suck ass ngl 10: FGEBUHIWJOKPOFJEH(W*)POKD 11: aNgeLS aRe rEaL 12: MY DOG FUCKING DIED 13: okay what the fuck 14: schizophrenia 15: disfigurement is cool 16: i don't wanna fucking die 17: stereotyping is real guys 18: huh 19: idk what this song is about but it's silly

LINCOLN 1: long distance relationship 2: MOOFBEHUJWIRU#*u9IKM 3: don't do drugs 4: male pattern baldness 5: parodies are fun 6: childhood nightmares amiright? 7: is this a metaphor for being a piece of shit 8: don't be sad bro 9: goddamn i sure love war 10: HAHA PUNS 11: abusive relationships frfr 12: fuck santa claus 13: fuck the haters 14: DIVORCE :D 15: whaaaaaat theeeeee fuuuuck 16: handstands are cool ig 17: i am going to kms 18: manipulating people to get what you want is awesome

FLOOD 1: self-advertising 2: nightlights are epic 3: COWBOY DIVORCE 4: history is cool 5: reincarnation 6: DON'T BE RACIST I AM A BUILDING 7: this can be a metaphor for anything 8: it's not the 1960's dude 9: cool rocks 10: stop moving chairs KYLE it's not cool 11: old people 12: this one's for all those lower-class workers 13: birds are so epic 14: more like taking a shit in the park 15: who the fuck is this guy 16: cave people 17: abusive relationships AGAIN 18: self-advertising AGAIN 19: the goddamn berlin wall

APOLLO 18 1: death lol 2: palindromes are so epic 3: enlarged to show texture 4: doppelgangers bro :( 5: biology class 6: is this about drugs 7: everyone skips this song 8: guitars are epic 9: pavlov's dog 10: why do they love singing about hateful relationships 11: why is this intro so fucking long 12: is this about jesus 13: wooooaaaaahh space 14: don't be shy bro 15: DEATH!!!!! 16: magicians 17: my adhd brain 18: oh finally an instrumental

JOHN HENRY 1: dreaming about death XD LOL 2: snails are amazing 3: getting stoned is cool 4: COWBOY DIVORCE AGAIN?? 5: LEAN 6: this song was made for neurodivergents (in a good way) 7: french is cool 8: alice cooper is so fucking cool 9: does anyone even like this song 10: why does this song even exist bro 11: jail and greek philosophers 12: religious cults 13: this is apollo 18 all over again 14: it's giving tomorrow never knows by the beatles 15: SPOILER ALERT: james ensor 16: "it's too hot" "it's too cold" OH MY GOD AN EXPLOSION 17: stalker 😒 18: roblox jailbreak 19: what 20: woah this is darker than i thought it would be

FACTORY SHOWROOM 1: whore slut bitch cunt 🥰🥰🥰 2: drugs? AGAIN???? 3: transgender 4: i see dead people 5: song of the summer 6: the original song was better 7: dysfunctional family 8: new wave battle 9: hypnotist of ladies's evil cousin 10: presidents are cool 11: ya like jazz 😏 12: I HEAR YOU 13: this is like take me to church by hozier but cooler

LONG TALL WEEKEND 1: oh my god we get another instrumental 2: mink car foreshadowing 3: lesley gore is an icon 4: rats are awesome 5: oh no we lost our token 6: mink car foreshadowing again 7: women are epic 8: this is such a vibe 9: evil 10: violence and killing and murder and crimes :3 11: nuh uh 12: oh shit we got lost oh fuck 13: shhhh don't cry 14: backwards shit 15: thomas edison is a bitch

MINK CAR 1: i love your hair 2: i don't need haters 3: overstimulation 4: goofy ahh 5: this is so corny-2000's-boy-band-love-song-core 6: i am a vampire be afraid 7: aw man you're just a sombrero 8: groovy 9: i am miserable 10: alcoholism 11: it's like that one meme 12: lmao you're so fucking old (psst you're gonna die soon) 13: omg i got run over by a fucking bedazzled car 14: evil skrunkly 15: stop fucking lying 16: who even- 17: james bond inspector gadget idk

THE SPINE 1: homestar runner 2: why is kermit here 3: working in an office is cool 4: holy shit this is so good 5: tomfoolery 6: beach boys reference 7: i hate bastards 8: later on.... 9: abusive relationships back at it again 10: caffeine got me like 11: CUNTY 12: french AGAIN?? 13: HOORAY 14: broke in two like a glowstick 15: writer's block makes a comeback 16: sobbing rn

THE ELSE 1: sarcasm at it's finest 2: YOU DON'T NEED THAT BASTARD IN YOUR LIFE GIRL 3: turn that frown upside down 4: someone call an exorcist 5: coraline moment 6: AHOY THERE MATEYS 7: bruh it's so dark. i guess i'm WITH THE DARK HAHAHA 8: omg clone high reference?? 9: woah that's fucked up 10: damn it my hope just withered 11: bro i need my dictionary 12: amnesia moment 13: it is not the late fourth millennium BC

JOIN US 1: fuck everyone and everything 2: hey girl are you a girl because you look like a girl 3: you're crazy😂😂😂 4: cryptids are epic 5: shut the fuck up you bitch 6: rapunzel 7: woohoo 8: i am a gifted burnout kid 9: can you die rn lmao 10: okay so what 11: ily judy 12: in my hopeless romantic era 13: this is such a vibe 14: don't text and drive 15: dogs 16: what year is it 17: what 18: "i don't like this song" AND IT DOESN'T LIKE YOU EITHER

NANOBOTS 1: go to the fucking hospital 2: what the fuck does this even mean 3: huh 4: this is so fire 5: scooby-doo ahh song 6: my mom died 7: fuck elon musk 8: i must eep 9: FIRE SONG ABOUT REBELLION 10: i am going to go cry 11: fuck the past this is the present 12: shhh these are 9 secret steps 13: bees love your mind 14: hmmmmm 15: nouns are epic 16: ROBIN GOLDWASSER 17: insects and hospitals 18: predicament 19: ooh funky 20: weirdcore bitches be like 21: WHO'S DAVE 22: tiktok alt kids be like 23: and why he eepy 24: such a vibe 25: you can't kill me haha

GLEAN 1: a beautiful mix of death and love 2: i love being alive dude 3: new superhero idea MARVEL GET ON IT 4: this is goofy ahh 5: bro i'm just tryna get you to like me 6: wow what an amazing connection to the real world 7: fight me 8: it's giving musical 9: boyfriends suck 10: incoherent 11: i'm sorry women 12: stop being a pussy 13: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA 14: TRES BON 15: MORE INSTRUMENTALS???

PHONE POWER 1: you're crazy bro 2: ily but not like that 3: kidnappings are fire 4: imagination! 5: stop being mean to detroit 6: goofy ahh 7: bloody noses bro 8: i thought this was gonna be like that matt & kim song 9: 4th of july 🦅🇺🇲 10: cryptids again 11: dial-a-song song 12: shut up bitch imma haunt you 13: what this title makes no sense 14: i'm sorry woman 15: woah shapeshifting 16: better than the original frfr on god no cap big facts 17: okay... 18: self-advertisement

I LIKE FUN 1: is this gonna be over bro 2: astral projection 3: AAAA AAAAAA 4: back in my day 5: salty ass bitch 6: this slaps so hard 7: I LIKE FUN BRO 8: banger 9: microphone 10: take a walk on the sunny side 11: turn on the lights 12: aaa nessie 13: what 14: nick offerman 15: WE DIE ALONE WE DIE AFRAID WE LIVE IN TERROR WE'RE NAKED AND ALONE AND THE GRAVE IS THE LONELIEST PLACE

BOOK 1: just to refresh your memory (our last album was from 2018) 2: aaaah di ahh di ah di ah di yay 3: everyone hates me bro 4: CAN'T CUT IT AS AN ARTIST 5: snow 6: it's not just for winnipeg 7: aw man what happened to my dream 8: stupid clown 9: poison is epic 10: where the fuck is thursday 11: you wanna believe me but you can't 12: i'm super cool 13: hmmm 14: i ain't a clown 15: 0 is less than 1

[tirednotflirting]

R U L E S : you can usually tell a lot about a person by the type of music they listen to! Put your favourite playlist on shuffle and list the first 10 songs, then tag 10 people! No skipping!

ok @clumsyclifford​ tagged me in this dude and i think? i’ve done it before but i’m gonna go again for fun. we’re gonna use my playlist titled ‘songs with lyrics i would have used as subtweets in 2014′ for this time around: 

1. all out of tears - Z Berg: god z is a GODDESS you guys. originally found her bc ryan ross but stayed bc her specific brand of spooky hot girl music is exactly the vibe we need rn. 

2. someone you loved - Lewis Capaldi: there was a period like last fall i think where i just looped this song for like a week straight. i was totally okay it’s just So So pretty

3. meet you there - 5 seconds of summer: the second verse of this i think is what got it onto this particular playlist djfdsjfkls

4. oh, calamity! - all time low: oh good i get the opportunity to talk about this one. chorus got this one onto the playlist. ‘it’s such a shame that we play strangers’????? ‘damn it’s such a shame that we’ve built a wreck out of me’???? alex. DUDE. when bella first made me atl essentials i think i looped this one like 10 times or something. probably? probably? my favorite atl song?

5. the last of the real ones - fall out boy: so i am Weird and i’ve been going through my pop punk phase in my early 20s and other than like? the ones that got radio play while growing up, this was the first fob song i heard. ‘i wonder if your therapist knows everything about me?’ if what i would have subtweeted from it’ in case ur curious 

6. monster - dodie: god i love dodie. have i mentioned that ever? bc she’s basically the loml. this song was also v cute live.

7. easier - 5 seconds of summer: baby’s first song release when i was actually here. i was so late to the party ! wild 

8. bad ideas - tessa violet: tessa has a really specific kind of magic in her music. this album really kinda spoke to me when a lot of other music wasn’t. bad ideas the album was a really really important album in my 2019. it made me realize a lot. idk

9. nicotine - panic! at the disco: this only made it to this playlist bc i liked a boy when i was 16 who smoked ok it’s dumb ok. also this song live FUCKS

10. babylon - 5 seconds of summer: if we’re way to faded to drive you can stay one more night amiright??????? also it’s the studio version on this playlist but babylon yeah rights 

ALRIGHTY tagging! @kaleidoscopeminds, @tigerteeff, @haikucal, @glitterblazercalum, @malumlftv, @escapesos, @lukesgiggle, and anybody else looking to expose their music taste jkfsdjklf

[donutthief10]

🎀soft kpop asks🎀

1. What kpop songs make you feel at home?

Imma just say EXO love love love (rearranged) [Live]. I’ve had the best memories with this song and I jammed hard to this song a lot in the car. Pretty peaceful and chill and slow. 

2. What idol(s) do you associate with kindness?

EXO Lay, GOT7 Jackson, RED VELVET Yeri, literally everyone from MONSTA X and SEVENTEEN. MONSTA X and SEVENTEEN radiate kindness I swear dude.

3. Has a kpop song or group helped you through some difficult times? If so, and if you feel comfortable, share how.

EXO. They were the first group I deeply got into and invested so much of my late high school and early college time in. I can’t think of anything too crazy or difficult, but just when I’m feeling low or have a bad day and things don’t go well, I can search any exo crack video or sweet video of them and it instantly cheers me up and I feel better. 

4. What idol would you star gaze with? Why?

I’d like to be with Kyungsoo, of course. I think he seems very insightful and I would like to have any conversation with him, from silly to deep. Also NCT Mark. That kid is everything, he’s a funny goofball but for being his age has probably seen and done so many things, and I’d love to pick his brain.

5. What’s your favorite ballad?

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O_OGaSy99vU you’ll thank me. Best cover I’ve ever heard in my life. And I’ll fight anyone who disagrees.

6. What was your first kpop group that you stanned? Why did you stan?

EXO. They were the first group i really took my time getting to know. And I’ve never seen a musical group with so many members, my gosh. Thank goodness they have so much content. It was fun getting into them kinda in the middle stage, CMB era. There’s enough stuff to see them from the very start and go from there, and still loving them to this day (June 2020) I’ve really got to see them grow as wonderful men and human beings. Like who knew Chen would become DADDY first, amiright ladies.

7. Would you rather give or receive a gift from your bias?

Oh for sure give a gift. I like writing AND gift giving, and I think just writing a simple letter to an idol I appreciate or a group in general would be great. I’d give me the opportunity to thank them for helping me through tough times, they give me hope and cheer, and to express that everyone feels the same way. They deserve to know how much us fans are so thankful for them. 

8. What are some cute nicknames you have for your biases?

Kyungsoo has strawberrysoo and Sooberry, Chen’s got chen-rry. It was a joke between a friend and I when we made EXO into fruit. 

9. What idol(s) would you go to an arcade with? Why?

I think Baekhyun and NCT Johnny would be fun. They’re both pretty energetic and can provide excellent narration. And Baek’s pretty much a gamer anyways so he’d help me shoot lol.

10. What are some things you associate with your bias?

Kyungsoo- khakis, fly fishing dad outfit, dad fashion, the color black, nike, cooking, penguins, eyebrow game on fleek, heart lips, owl eyes, soft, kind, talented, handsome af, pls bring back red hair i beg you. must i go on???

11. What idol(s) would you bake cookies with? Why?

NCT Taeyong. Cooking would be so fun, just jammin’ to songs and baking. He’s a precious bean and I’d be fun eating cookie dough instead of actually cooking it would be a blast. And I bet he has a crazy sweet tooth.

12. What idol(s) would you like to share comfortable silence with? Why?

Kyungsoo, he seems like a pro at that lol. SVT Joshua, MX Shownu, RV Wendy. They’re just peaceful human beings and I can image just all of us reading or doing work peacefully in each other’s presence. 

13. What idol(s) would you like to share your favorite food with?

Kyungsoo, I love that he’s a foodie and enjoys cooking. I’d love to eat pho and ramen and sushi with him and just talk about life. MX Wonho would be fun to go on ramen dates with, since that’s his fav too. 

14. What idol, when they come to mind, makes you feel warm, fuzzy, at home?

Kyungsoo. Pretty obvious at this point haha. He’s my fav and I adore him dearly. His voice too, my gosh. His singing voice is just so gentle and warm, it certainly gives you the warm fuzzies.

15. Which idol would you like to have a long, deep hug with? Why?

MX Shownu. He just seems to have such a soft touch, and he’s known as the papa bear in the group. It helps that he’s pretty muscular, i think his hugs would be nice and warm and strong.

16. What’s your ideal day with an idol(s)?

I would like to spend a day or two with SEVENTEEN. I think going out and having a good meal with them would be great. It’s a great way to get to know someone and talk about easy mundane things. I have the best memories with friends at a lake, or going out in nature. So i think time with them hiking or having a lake day would be so peaceful and fun. Also inner-tubing, omg that’d be a blast. They’re all such GOOD BUDDIES to each other, and crackheads at the same time. They’re energy would be nothing but fun and exciting.

17. What idol(s) would you watch the sunrise with?

I mean... all of EXO. BTS Hobi, NCT Jaehyun and Taeyong, SVT Scoups

18. What idol(s) would you watch the sunset with?

EXO... again haha. MX Jooheon and Minhyuk, BTS Taehyung, SVT Joshua and Wonwoo

19. Has an idol or group said anything that has stuck with you?

“The possibility of all those possibilities being possible is just another possibility that can possibly happen" ~ Mark Lee, 2019. An iconic king

20. What idol would you like to spend a rainy day in with? What would you do? (please keep it appropriate lmao)

I think Johnny and Mark would be super fun. I think a nice puzzle would be nice to do, a time to talk and get to know them, with hot chocolate and blankets. And like a crazy netflix or hulu binge watching, and eating popcorn. I’m used to commenting and making jokes during movies/tv so I’d to joke around with them and see what they have to say about a movie or tv. 

21. Talk about why you love your bias so much.

Kyungsoo is just such a sweet soul. I saw a video of him just now and it was when he was 19 years old, and he was so sweet and giggly and smily. And it’s astounding to see him grow into such a mature young man. he’s done great success in acting, and seeing the kinds of talents he possesses. He’s a talented singer, a good dancer, an amazing actor, and he cooks. He seems very mature and yeah, kinda looks dead inside at award shows, but I think he’s got a good head on his shoulders. And when the time comes he can become goofy and cute, even when it seems he doesn’t want to/do it on purpose.

22. Would you rather go to Disneyland or Everland with your bias? What would you do there?

I mean easily Disneyland. i wanna see every member of my favs wear Mickey ears decked out in Disney gear. They definitely deserve a day of fun and laughter and no stress, and just living out as a young adult. 

23. What do you imagine your bias to smell like?

Kyungsoo- Idk probably just clean, like soap and whatever cologne he may wear. He’s a simple man lol.

24. What do you wish for your bias group or idol in the future?

I just want happiness for everyone, and success and to remember how much we love them and appreciate them for all the hard work they do. 

25. What season do you associate a group or idol with? Why?

SVT is summer, for sure. They come up with the most boppiest of bops, and the energy for them best fits a summer road trip with the windows down and music blasting.

26. What idol would you like to share childhood stories with?

Honestly anyone who has traveled from the US to SK. I love hearing their stories and how hard they worked to get where they are. They really sacrificed everything they knew in the States and went to a place they don’t know well, have to learn a new language, and miss their families. I’d like to hear how they made it to where they are and what they’ve learned over the years. 

[arplis]

Arplis - News: 12 True Sex Stories You Have to Read to Believe

“WHEN HARRY MET SALLY” - COLUMBIA PICTURES   You’re out to brunch with your girlfriends, how long does it take for the conversation to turn to sex? Not long, amiright? It’s not just the ladies on “Sex and The City” who love to talk about sex—it’s most of us. We talk about it with our friends, our partners, and depending on how self-conscious you may feel, complete strangers. We talk about our true sex stories wether it be the amazing sex we’ve had, the comical, the sometimes strange and unusual, and even the not-so-great sex.  For many of us, we learned more about sex from our friends than we did from our parents or sex education class. It’s fun to share our sex stories—if it wasn’t, there wouldn’t be live storytelling shows, podcasts, books, TV shows, or movies. Fantasy has its place, but the stories that resonate the most with us are the true stories, those that actually happened. I AM & CO put the word out that we were looking for true sex stories and we received a very diverse response; stories from various sexual preferences, practices, and levels of sexual experience. All of these true sex stories are ones you have to read to believe. 12 True Sex Stories Guaranteed to Raise Eyebrows “Not Friends, No Benefit” Comedian Shalewa Sharpe, creator of  "So You Just Out Here?" I ran into my one-night-stand guy at the club. Now, some people might call that a “friend with benefits” but that term suggests that the two parties are friendly enough to schedule a benefit. This guy and I were not friends. Our benefits only happened if we ran into each other at the club. So, we made out for a minute, then he suggested we take this party to my car. This was how I ended up parked behind a grocery store, attempting to have sex with this guy in my 1988 Honda Prelude—a sports coupe, with bucket seats. Have you had sex in bucket seats? If so, a follow-up question: are you double jointed? The guy and I struggled for a bit, then his face fell. “Oh, this sucks,” he moaned. “It’s because my dick’s too small.” I had to console this guy while also keeping an eye out for the cops. If you find yourself in this predicament, don’t end up saying what I said: “Hey man, we’re in bucket seats—this ain’t gonna be easy.” A real mood-killer. We threw in the towel, I dropped him off back at the club and went home. Later that night, my roommate, who was the club’s doorperson, mentioned that she saw the guy with a weeping woman at the end of the night—they were walking in circles around the parking lot, then they hopped on his motorcycle and split. The next day, as I was furiously scrubbing and vacuuming my car, I found a driver’s license for a young woman wedged between the front passenger seat and the middle console. I guess it fell out of one-night-stand guy’s pocket during the, uh, festivities. I scratched out the ID’s info, punched a hole in it, and hung it on my rearview mirror as a cautionary tale. “It’s Part Of It” Jason, Columbus, Ohio We were both in college and had been dating for a while when she decided to take it to the next level. “Tie me up,” she demanded. “Okay, um, I’m going to tie you up now,” I said and went to get some scarves that were conveniently strewn about and set to work. “No!” “Oh, my God! I’m so sorry! I thought that…” and I began to loosen the bonds.  “No, it’s part of what makes it so hot.” “Oh, right,” I said and went back to doing Boy Scout knots such as the square knot and the sheepshank. I wondered if I should go with the trucker’s hitch? Nah. Too much.  “I’m going to f*ck you now,” I said getting into it. “Let me go!” I immediately stop what I’m doing. “Oh my God, I am an idiot. I am so sorry. I didn’t understand. You see, when you said you wanted, what I thought was, but in reality, I see… Oh no, I’m so sorry.” I quickly start to untie all the knots.  “No, it’s part of it.”  “What Goes Around, Comes Around” Ashley, Raleigh, North Carolina I paid my boyfriend for sex the first summer we were together…11 years later, he’s paying me for sex. “The Hook-Up Room”  Comedian Anita Flores, host of I'm Listening: A Frasier Podcast with Anita Flores. I’m at my first high- school party, and it’s not going well. Between my social anxiety and the fact that I only know the host, all I can think about is how I’m going to escape. I can’t actually leave, or else I’ll seem “uncool.” Fortunately, I come up with the next best solution. After making some light small talk with the host (Cassie) about her impressive selection of snacks, I ask, “Is there anywhere I can take a nap?” At the time, this seemed like a normal way to still be at the party without having to speak to anyone. I can’t say that Cassie agreed. After a long pause, she replied, “Uh, I guess in my attic.” I gleefully head to the attic. All the lights are off and it’s strangely warm, but it beats talking to people. I feel around and discover a futon I can pretend to sleep on. There I am lying down when something round and muscular attacks my face. It’s a butt, and it's smothering me! Ever want to suffocate someone, but don’t have a pillow? Just wear thick, non-breathable polyester pants. I hear a low voice. It’s a boy butt. He hears my muffled cries, gets up and exclaims, “Whoa, sorry dude!”  Now there’s giggling. He’s with a girl. Suddenly, I hear what sounds like a lot of teens slurping soup. There are more people in this room than I realized. Cassie sent me to take a nap in “the hook-up room!” Picture “Eyes Wide Shut: The Early Years.” Before the masks, there were braces. By this time, the boy butt and his lady friend have taken the futon from me. I'm standing there feeling left out because no one has asked me to join in. I can’t run away, otherwise, everyone will think I’m a prude! So, I find an empty loveseat, plop down, and close my eyes. Because there’s nothing cooler than ignoring sex. I’ll make sure to tell my future teen daughter that, too.  “There Are Rules” Michael, Portland, Oregon I was sessioning with a dominatrix named Vixen when her friend Wendy came over. Vixen blindfolded me and put me in the corner, which I was more than okay with. The minute Vixen’s back was turned, I took off the blindfold, even though I knew (and hoped,) I’d be punished. Vixen took out a strap on from her toy-cupboard and proceeded to f*ck Wendy with it. It was quite a show and later,  I was punished severely for watching—it was well worth the tribute that I paid Vixen. “Don’t Stop Under Any Circumstances!” Carrie, Chicago, Illinois My boyfriend and I were having sex one night on my old as hell bed. He was an ex-professional football player and I’m a big girl, so it shouldn’t have been surprising that right when things were getting super intense, the bed broke. He stopped what he was doing, so I yelled, “Don’t stop! I’m so close!” Without moving from the now broken bed, we get back at it and this time we don’t stop until we both cum. If there had been an earthquake or a tornado, I would have made him keep going then, too. “Side Effects Can Be Embarrassing” Krysta, Orlando, Florida  I've never been really big into taking birth control, but a coworker of mine mentioned that she was on a pill where she only had a period every three months... I wanted in on that! So, I went to my doctor and got on birth control. I started dating this new guy, who was literally the sexiest human-created. Around him, I tried to be Miss Perfection. Meanwhile, I'm on these new birth control pills and the doctor forgot to mention that they had lactose in them. I'm extremely lactose intolerant, even the smallest bit gives me major gas.  The first time the perfect guy and I had sex was a disaster. Every thrust he made inside of me made me pass gas. It was so embarrassing. We literally had to stop and go to Walgreens to get me some type of gas pills because he and I both couldn't take the noise, let alone the smell.  Let's just say, I stopped taking those pills immediately.  “Sex On The Deserted Beach” Beverly, New York City My partner and I were having a romantic vacation for my birthday in Newport, Rhode Island, and decided to spice things up by making love on a (deserted) beach in the middle of the night. Unfortunately, this beach was not quite as deserted or private as we had initially anticipated. All of a sudden we saw flashes of bright light, immediately stopped, and became alarmed.  A police officer arrived, trying to hold back a grin, and asked us if we'd seen some "kids swimming" after hours. We said no, he left, and we quickly packed up our things to make a quick exit. We drove home laughing not quite knowing what to make of the experience, but it certainly was a bonding one. It's definitely an evening and birthday I won't soon forget. “Don’t Disturb Grandpa” Spencer, Phoenix I hooked-up once with this guy who was taking care of his grandpa. It was around 10:00 p.m. by the time I got to his house. Whispering, he asked me to follow him and to not make any noise, his grandpa was watching TV in the living room. The guy sneaked me into a bedroom, but I guess that wasn’t soundproof enough, so we went into the closet and had very cramped and uncomfortable sex in there. I don’t think his grandpa had any idea about what was going on. “Male High Club” Reynaldo, San Diego, California I was taking a night flight home from Hawaii, as I was sitting down, I turned to see a guy who was so handsome I was stunned. Like a lot of us, he wore shorts and Aloha shirts, but he was well-built and looked more like he’d be a lead on one of those Hawaii detective shows. There was an empty seat near me on the aisle, and the guy asked if he could sit there to stretch out his legs. Other than nodding yes, we didn’t talk. The man grazed my knee with his leg, and all the hairs on my leg stood on end. And he didn’t pull away right away, just gradually. He got up to get a blanket from the overhead compartment which he placed over his legs. With no talking at all, he made the slightest gesture to offer me some of the blanket. Before you know it, the blanket was spread over both our legs. Then, our hands somehow started to find each other. And for a long time on the flight, that was it…just our hands grasping together, coming loose, rejoining, stroking fingers. I couldn’t believe this was happening. I was rock hard. And gradually, very gradually, all without talking and with this stud of a guy who I did not know at all, our hands gradually started to stroke each other’s thighs, mirroring each other.  And eventually, very discreetly to not get attention or show movement above the blanket, we each found our erections extending out through the bottom of our shorts, and we grabbed each other. Eventually, some napkins or handkerchiefs were brought below, and without making any sound, we both came, and it was pretty simultaneous.  “Kung Fu Fighting” Carol Gee, Author, “Random Notes ( About Life. "Stuff"And Finally Learning To Exhale)” A romantic, I fantasized about what it would be like to have sex on satin sheets. My fantasy materialized when my husband and I, two young Air Force sergeants returning from living in the Far East, stopped to visit another Air Force friend and his lady in San Francisco. Invited to spend the night, the lady made the guest room bed up with a brand new pair of red satin sheets. How did she know my fantasy? I couldn’t wait to get my husband in bed to enjoy sex so good that the neighbors in the apartment next door would have needed a cigarette.  I took a shower, smoothed on scented body lotion and got into bed. My husband was already in it waiting for me. On those satin sheets, our lovemaking suddenly morphed into Kung Fu fighting. Taking me into his arms I accidentally poked him in the ribs. Oof! Climbing on top of him I kneed in the thigh. Ouch! Attempting to kiss him I missed his mouth and ended up rubbing noses with him. Then his pillow slid off the bed, mine quickly followed. Instead of holding onto him, I held tightly to the bedsheets trying not to slide off, taking him with me. Not only was the whole thing a disaster, but we also got very little sleep that night for trying to stay in the middle of the bed. Frankly, I'm glad those sheets weren’t mine as they would most likely have ended up as pretty red curtains.  “Girl/Girl Love Lesson” Sensual Massage Therapist, Jazmin Light The streets of Zurich were empty as I headed toward their place. The gentleman on the phone had asked me if I would "be" with his girlfriend—while he watched. He said she wanted a woman to show him "what women like." The World Cup soccer games were on, and that night, Switzerland was playing. The air bristled with excitement. All anyone talked about was "Fussball." Everyone's windows were wide open due to the summer heat.  A classy-looking man in his mid-fifties opened the door to a modern loft apartment. Surprised, I wondered, “Shouldn't he know what women like by now?” Behind him, pouring champagne at the high-top table, stood Nadia, perhaps thirty years his junior. In her red La Perla lingerie and matching stilettos. She handed me a glass and kissed me on the mouth. We made a toast. I took a sip, then lifted Nadia's silky blonde hair and kissed her neck. I let my lips and teeth linger, then gave her a soft bite. She gasped. Suddenly, a roar of voices sailed in through our window and engulfed us. "YAAAAAY!!!” The cheering came from next door, from above us, below us, and from outside. “GOAL!” We laughed as the ruckus died down. I stroked Nadia's hair, neck, and torso. "There are endless ways to please a woman, Manfred," I said, twirling my fingers on her lacy bra cups. Manfred plopped down on the bed and stared at us, his mouth open.  I unsnapped her bra, returning his gaze. "There's much more to women then nipples and—" I slid my hand to her panties, "pearls." Nadia inhaled sharply. "So slow down, savor, discover, and—play!" Nadia groaned, Manfred grinned. New shrieks and cheers exploded throughout the neighborhood. *** When you share a sex story, it can help you to connect with other people, learn about yourself and others, and it can inspire you to try new things. As humans, we’re always growing and that includes our sexuality.  Sex is part of the human experience and it’s always fun to hear someone else’s stories of incredible sex, confusing sex, or way-out-there sex. #Sex #Relationships

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