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pumpkinpartynoelle · 3 months ago

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(image by AdamDrawz on reddit)

So, it's been a couple weeks since I've put any work into part 2 of VAT. This isn't, like, an announcement that I'm going to be working on it again, though I probably will be soonish (and definitely will be if we get a release date for chapter 3 and 4, because terrible mood be damned I'm getting this out before the next chapters unless Toby springs it on us with no warning), but I kind of just wanted to let everyone know this is still on my mind. I just haven't been feeling very great these past few weeks, so I haven't really been active enough to do much. Hopefully soon! Hopefully. augh

But yeah, so, the Jevil section is totally done now, if I recall correctly, so I think it's just the Spamton bits that are left. There's a little more to do on the Heaven and Hell sections still, but since part of that will be covered in the Spamton stuff I don't think those'll take me more than a day each, once I get back to working on it. I might also rework the intro, since that's kinda the most important part, but it's a little less important in part 2 since it assumes you've already read part 1 (and links to it, of course).

I can just never find the right way to say what I want to say, especially concisely, and account for the varying perspectives of people in the Deltarune community, especially since, subscribing to a lot of Jaru's theories as I do, and mentioning them due to how well they compliment Variable Angel Theory, I feel I risk damaging whatever goodwill many people would extend to me when they first see my stuff. Variable Angel Theory, too, runs heavily counter to a lot of community perceptions on Deltarune, and I've already gotten some very harsh criticism (although, a lot of it doesn't really make any sense to me even with consideration, and some of it feels more like it's piggybacking on Jaru hate rather than actually making good points), so the whole thing is kind of draining, even more than usual.

But yeah, just to double triple clarify, not quitting! The only way I don't put this out is if chapters 3 and 4 get surprise-released before I can finish it, and even then I still might finish it if they don't disprove my theory. Though, I'm pretty sure once those chapters are out, I'll have enough info to confidently say one way or the other whether I'm correct on all this, even if we don't see much of it come to fruition just yet. If I am correct on it, you might even be able to expect a part 3, or some other big theory entirely! Plus that tattoo I promised I'd get!

#deltarune #noelle holiday #pumpkinNoelle #variable angel theory #update #update update update update i guess #jevil #spamton #deltarune theory #spamton g spamton

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eemoo1o-animoo · 2 years ago

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for the ask game, perhaps N? and/or P?

Ask me stuff

This took so long to answer! I’m so sorry for the wait. And the links. And the tangent. Aahsbhdb

N – Name three things you wish you saw more of in your main fandom (or a fandom of choice):

This is tricky! I tend to just be like “Augh I wish there was more of that” and then forget all about it. I guess I’ll try thinking of things in the fandom and not in the canon material? Hm – tricky.

Black Butler fandom – I want more aroace William, or at least ace William, representation. I don’t want him shipped with Grelle, I want them being BFFs. *Pointing with judgement* Let them crack open a bottle of wine and/or whiskey by the fire after work and talk about nice, idle things, like their sonboy Ronald (who’s pawing at the babygate like the sad goldendoodle he is because he wasn’t allowed in due to his alcoholism).

Black Butler canon/fandom – I want Snake to speak for himself. Like, either in fanfiction or — more preferably — canon, where he at last breaks and, against the opinions of his snakes, goes “Fuck you, Ciel!” and then full stop. No “says Emily” or “exclaims Oscar”. Nothing. It’s meaningful. Poignant. You can tell that Snake is really hurt about having his found family lie to him so easily, to be betrayed by his second family after losing his first. This is Snake, even if it’s just for a moment, talking for himself. Poor Snake :(

Black Butler fandom – I want more creepypastas / grimdarks / etc.. Plain and simple, it’s meant to be a dark, perhaps horrific at times, franchise and so where are the creepy one shots? The “The Woman In Black” parodies? The subtly dark pieces where Ciel is stuck in an endless game of fleshy marionette for Sebastian’s own amusement? Where?

Bonus:

Sk8 the Infinity fandom/canon – I want more Adam-facing-consequences fics (and hopefully canon content in the upcoming season two), and Tadashi and Miya interaction, because those two look related and hardly interact in canon. I’ve only ever come across one (platonic) fic of them on AO3. One.

P – Invent a random AU for any fandom (we always need more ideas):

Oh, this is tricky! I don’t think I think of many AUs? At the very least they’re fleeting and / for one shot purposes as opposed to a full-fledged universe? (Alternatively there’s also an idea I had of making a book of rarepair scraplets vaguely set in the same universe for the reader to piece together, like a one shot where Soma, Lizzie and Sieglinde are paired together “trying to get back to ‘x’” and Soma has to carry Sieglinde because her spider legs are broken and Wolfram is nowhere to be found.)

So seeing as you told me about your Snake/Edward / Sieglinde/Lizzie Friendship is Tragic-esque AU I’ll go ahead and state my Fallout Equestria-type one (why did I need brony comparisons for that?) that was kind of eluded to in this post (which is also kind of inspired by this post and its reblogs).

So in the post it was inspired by, I discussed if “shinigami and grim reapers” were different, and that “shinigami” were like “the original grim reapers” (don’t think of them like those things from Death Dote, but rather like The Exterminators from Hazbin) and that the redemption that the reapers work towards is actually fake, just a rumour used to keep them in line and then used as the excuse when reapers go “missing” (aka. the “Higher Up”, so to call them, of the original shinigami and/or older reapers that are in-the-know) to make way for newer reapers when Ole McLimboville becomes overcrowded (which it will as time progresses from the canon’s 1889 into modern day, as per real life suicide stats).

With my theory preluded, the AU would start off with Will’s “promotion/redemption” (#2 from (x)) (as it is known outwardly by the other reapers), but as the numbers begin to spike, a purge starts by the Higher Up / shinigami and Grelle and Ronald make it out after Grelle’s seen Othello die protecting her (a point which will later be paralleled when Grelle then does so for Ron), and go looking for the Undertaker, in case he knows what’s going on (after all, he and Othello are the same age-ish and Othello told them to find him).

I’d also thought about a possible, background Grelltaker flirtation, but that point can be ignored for now. I think if this is the case then Undertaker dies in front of Grelle rather than Othello, who, in this case, she just knows died? Also an point where Ron and Grelle begrudgingly take r!Ciel along with them (if he’s still alive / existing … he can be written out easily, though, I just remember him being a part of my original rough idea), and then it’s later just Ron looking after him after he and Grelle are separated (I’m still unsure whether a fakeout death is in order, or too cheesy to be worked into the plot well enough).

Essentially, it’s just Ronald then — as per his and Grelle’s plan after talking with the Undertaker — looking for a means to summon a demon (whether this will be Sebastian or not is undecided, though is the most likely because… why would I make an OC for something that isn’t TSoGtR? Really, now.) as to try and get an equal footing in the fight against the original shinigami (and the reapers in allegiance with them as part of the Higher Up’s council… as guides to the to-be ‘redeemed’, or even some of the redeemed themselves).

Perhaps there’s also a twisted element from the Higher Up like “You’re finally getting what you came here for/what you wanted, and yet you still fight it?”, when — on the reapers’ side of things — it’s actually because they want to avenge their friends for dying in massacre, so dishonourably (in some cases), and that they know that if they lose / give up, this will only go on and on, until it eventually happens again.

It’s an AU I definitely haven’t thought of in a while �� so trying to remember the better half of it was a bit of a struggle, but I enjoyed doing it! It’s a fun idea that I hope to revisit (though most probably will not, as I suck at action scenes / sequences / drama, so it would most likely turn out slow, and corny when it picks up pace, with plenty of emotional moments and monologues but not enough action/fighting).

Thanks for the ask! I enjoyed replying to it (though it took me, like, an hour to, by god).

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veliseraptor · 5 years ago

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Top 5 Nat moments

because I apparently hate myself I’m going to do what I did for Wanda and Loki when I did this and go with both comics and MCU moments.

COMICS

1. When she meets Laura Kinney and offers to train her (X-23 #20). I will never, ever not be bitter about the fact that we didn’t get Marjorie Liu’s series with the all female team (Black Widow, X-23, Mystique, and Electra), because augh. Could’ve had it all. But anyway, these panels:

This is Natasha, who has a history of being exploited and controlled by others, reaching out to a young woman who is coming out of her own history of (even more) exploitation and control, who is figuring out who she is and that she’s a person and not just a weapon for other people. It’s Natasha offering mentorship to her. And there’s something just…very powerful about that - about a character who often works on her own, and is certainly perceived as a loner, reaching out to another character and offering her guidance.

This is also in the context of her stepping in as part of breaking up a sex trafficking operation, which ties into another aspect of Natasha’s characterization in comics that I’ll get into later.

2. The whole interrogation in a fridge scene (Black Widow #4). I mean, the entirety of Name of the Rose (again, Marjorie Liu, she’s amazing) is a favorite moment, but this particular section will always stand out to me.

There’s a great essay about it over at @fuckyeahblackwidow, talking about how it plays with Natasha being literally in a fridge (a woman in a refrigerator, anyone?) and remaining totally in control of the situation throughout, ultimately turning it to her own advantage and revealing that getting here was part of her plan all along. It’s just gloriously done. I wrote an essay on a set of two panels from this scene for my art history class in college. It was great.

3. “I pick regret and kindness and mercy.” (Black Widow: Deadly Origin #4). I wouldn’t call this series as a whole ‘good’ but this part does always get me. I think because it has to do with the theme of choice, which I talk about a lot in my Black Widow Manifesto (linked below); the idea of being a hero not being part of an identity or something natural or automatic, but being a choice that’s made over and over again.

That for Natasha, it’s her very past as a villain that makes her very aware of that choice, and how deliberate it has to be. The context of this specific bit is that a character has just basically accused her of being an opportunist who doesn’t care about right or wrong - that she just picks sides based on whoever she likes best at the time. And this is her counter.

It’s that last part that always sticks out to me: “I pick regret and kindness and mercy.” Because it’s all things that are “soft.” That can be seen as “weak.” And this is Natasha decisively claiming them as hers - something that she’s chosen, and always will continue to choose.

4. The one where she goes toe to toe with Red Skull (Avengers #386). I didn’t read this one until recently when I tripped over it in my full readthrough of the first volume of the Avengers comics (starting in 1963). And when I did, let me tell you, I was thrilled.

I mean, there it is, right there. Red Skull has been beating up other Avengers for most of this issue, taking them down one at a time, and Natasha knows that. And here he is calling her the weakest of them all, and she’s absolutely ready and going to throw down. Unafraid, and defiant, and scornful. I love it. I love it.

5. Any of the times Natasha stands up for women/girls. I won’t put all the scans in this post, but I’ll just choose one of them:

This is a theme throughout Natasha’s appearances - the way that she relates to other women and will step in to help them when they’re in danger. Natasha has a reputation both in and out of universe for being cold and aloof, but the fact is that she has a very deep and very strong compassionate and protective streak, particularly for other women, particularly for other women specifically in danger from men/the patriarchy.

Whatever the perception of Natasha, or even, a lot of times, her self perception, she’s someone who has a great deal of heart for the people around her, and will always step up for the vulnerable.

Want a general “why I love comics!Natasha” manifesto with more favorite moments? Hey, I’ve got one for you.

MCU

It is too bad I am writing this before the actual Black Widow movie comes out when I could hopefully have all of these moments be from that. BUT in the meantime!

1. “Did I step on your moment?” There are three Winter Soldier moments on this list, and that is because, whatever my weird resentments toward Winter Soldier and the way fandom treats it, it is a movie that was really good for Natasha. And this is such a good one.

It’s in a scene where Robert Redford is building toward his grand conclusion, is certain of his own victory, is at the top of his game - and then there’s Natasha. Stepping on his moment, having been standing in the room in disguise the whole time.

2. “The truth is a matter of circumstances. It’s not all things to all people all the time, and neither am I.” This whole conversation with Steve is one of those ‘character defining’ moments I think about a lot, because it’s that dynamic of Natasha being a chameleon, and being very aware of the malleability of truth. Natasha lives in a world of shades of grey - not in terms of morality, even, necessarily, but in terms of definitions. Selfhood is flexible, identity is flexible, nothing is truly permanent or stable. Nothing lasts forever.

And that’s something Natasha is very much at peace with. It’s part of her survival, and it’s also just part of how she sees the world. It’s a sadness, in some ways - but it’s also a strength. Natasha’s ability to be flexible is one of the things that gives her an advantage and makes her a survivor. She adapts, she changes to suit a situation. It’s not a matter of being ‘two-faced’ or whatever - it’s a matter of understanding that identity isn’t singular or unidimensional.

Natasha has a very complicated and nuanced view of the world, and I feel like this conversation encapsulates some of that.

3. The highway fight in Winter Soldier. This is just...whenever we see Natasha absolutely unleash in a fight it’s super sexy, and this is probably my favorite version of that, because it is absolutely “Natasha fighting smart” and “Natasha going up against someone much stronger than she is, and doing pretty damn well for herself.”

4. Natasha-as-leader in Endgame. Okay, so Endgame ultimately did Natasha real dirty, but there were some good moments before then, and the one that stands out to me is the one early in the movie where Steve comes to see her and she is holding a meeting where she is coordinating efforts around the world, is clearly still tapped into the hero life, is trying to hold things together. Tony’s stepped out, Clint’s on a vengeance mission, Steve is trying (sort of) to do good things that aren’t Captain America things. Natasha’s still soldiering on, doing her best to staunch the bleeding.

And she’s clearly tired, and unhappy, but she will keep doing the work. Which is so very Natasha: it doesn’t matter, ultimately, what her personal feelings are. When there’s work to be done, she’ll do it.

5. The airport fight in Civil War. There are two moments in this that stick out to me - there’s the one with her and Clint (”we’re still friends, right?”) where she’s…idk, to me it reads a little like she’s still trying to hang on to both sides. I mean, it’s adorable, and also the fact that she and Clint are basically sparring with each other rather than actually fighting (Wanda calls Clint on it), but also there’s this sense that…Natasha’s never been in this for the ideology. She’s in it for the sake of doing what’s needed to keep her family alive and together.

Which is the second moment, obviously - when she stops T’Challa and lets Steve and Bucky escape. You can see that she knows what it means for her as far as her status, and as far as her other relationships. But she does it anyway, because she knows Steve won’t stop, won’t give up, and in order to keep him alive and safe she needs to let him get out of there - and also trusts that he’s not just running away, but running for a reason. That he has a purpose, and knows what he’s doing.

It’s a lot of faith that she’s giving, and a significant sacrifice she’s making at the same time.

Runner ups included anything with Auntie Nat, the Clint v. Natasha scene from The Avengers that I mentioned before, her intro scene with Bruce that I also mentioned before, and the “she’s not alone” moment from Infinity War.

I JUST LOVE NATASHA A LOT OKAY

#long post for ts #black widow #natasha romanoff #putting this in the tags because i put a lot of effort in here #natasha romanova is better than you #lisescans #a tag for comics #top five meme #lise memes #anonymous #conversating #now i only have one top tier comic fave i haven't done this for!#maybe i should just do that for fun

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withercat-writes · 5 years ago

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To Lose It All

So I got inspired, prepare for angst and Flux Buddies Spoilers, done in my usual rambling style! Its based on the idea I had on what if Blackrock was after Flux Buddies! Ao3 Link

Lalna was never the same after that fateful moment in Mother’s dimension, he wasn’t sure where The Doctor had dumped him to scold him, not that Lalna remembered anything really from this time, every moment from leaving that dimension was a blur, all he knew was eventually he found his way back to the others. He never let himself get close to them though, building a new base and locking himself away. The others tried to get close, to talk to him, to get him to at least acknowledge them more then mildly, none succeeded, Lalna didn’t want to risk getting attached again. He never tried to get back to the tower, Lalnable could live there for all he cared, better away from him then nearby anyways. Hopefully Tiddles had long since ran away from the maniac.

He knew Nano told him to be good, to be better then this, but he just couldn’t find it in him to care. It’s not like she could see, she was gone, poof, vanished, no respawn, someplace Lalna may never be allowed to reach, and with that fact in mind, it could be so hard to care. So he tinkered away, building and making mild pleasantries at Xephos who just wouldn’t leave him alone. He found himself quicker to violence, though it both sickened him, and intrigued him how little he cared anymore about the pain of others, he did his best to resist this sure, but sometimes the apathy would claw at his heart, and he’d go looking for a scrap to just feel something.

Soon his hands had him build that same weapon that killed Nano, and a faint wonderance past in his mind, would if he detonated, would his respawn fail? He couldn’t bring himself to test it, but he could never bring himself to take it out of his inventory either. So there it sat, before eventually the apathy clawed too much and he went out to look for a scrap, and saw Sjin. Everyone knew what happened next, the two got too heated, literally, fire burning all around. Lalna couldn’t stop, the adrenaline like wine to a dehydrated soul. It kept getting worse, explosions and death. He saw Rythian eyes wide in shock as one of Sjin's arrows plunged his throat, before another shot through his head, killing him instantly, he felt nothing to it. He saw Zoey take an arrow through the heart through the corner of his eye, and he felt nothing to it as well.

And why should he care anyways? They’d just respawn, they’d be fine, no worse for wear, maybe a bit annoyed, but who cares about that. There was no real consequences for them dying, they wouldn’t suffer, wouldn’t truly die, so why would death matter? They’d still be here, like Nano should have been, but she wasn’t. Nano wouldn’t be proud, but she was gone, so why care about that either. He wished they would permanently die for a moment, so they could never realize the curse they were all under.

He set down the explosives and set them off, retreating back a bit, he wasn’t fully ready to die, natural aversions to that and all that. It unfortunately did not kill him, and soon he noticed Sjin in his base and he rushed to fix the damage, he wasn’t trying to blow up literally everything, fucking Sjin! He was too late though, and the world turned white, and he couldn’t stop the smile.

Alas, he woke up all the same, a new world yes, but he knew it was just more of the same, he clutched the sapphire in his pocket tight as he couldn’t stop a few tears. He got back to work though, building up a castle, throwing himself into his machines. No one cared beyond a few dirty looks about the end of the past world, and why should they? Everything that mattered was fine, they were alive, unharmed, with infinite potential, instead of gone, lost, dead. Everyone still had there friends, and loved ones, the lucky bastards.

He isolated himself once more in his castle, he decided this time to craft it to remind him of the first base with Nano, to hopefully inspire some emotion as he kept to himself again. This time no one cared about this isolation, it seems they’d finally given up on him, and he grew further into apathy, he learned Rythian wanted revenge, he shrugged it off, okay whatever why should he care? Then he learned about Zoeya.

Then rage bubbled in his chest for the first time in months.

How DARE he do this, how dare he come to face him for revenge with an apprentice that FELL FROM THE SKY, with an apprentice with a CHEERFUL GO LUCKY ATTITUDE, an apprentice EAGER TO LEARN, an apprentice with UNIQUENESS and OPTIMISM, and still SASS. Really the only way Rythian could have made it worse is if he gave her a sapphire, he shuddered at the thought, hand clutching her sapphire again.

How dare he get revenge with someone that reminded him so much of Nano. Revenge he could ignore? But this? THIS?? This was an insult, a grave cruel insult! To rub it in his face that Rythian has what he lost, that Rythian could do it so much fucking better, what a joke, what a piece of shit! He threw himself into his research, fine, it had been too long since he felt anything anyways, and rage and sadism was something familiar. A part of him wondered if this is the kind of thing that created Lalnable, Lalna crushed those thoughts, no, he was better then that, he would always be better then that.

He ignored every warning, buried himself even more in his castle. Came up with the ingenious forcefield idea. Then he waited, and waited, but the first one at his door was not an angry mage, but a girl, so fiery for a second he saw Nano. He blinked it off though and gave her the warmest smile he could, he wished he could say something new bubbled in his chest, but they didn’t the now well known rage and sadism just souring more, as he thinks about what could have been as he pretended everything was alright for her. The dinosaur he just kinda, ignored for the most part, gave him the creeps.

He was surprised when he heard she and Rythian got into a spat though, ha, he’d never have thrown Nano out for being a technomage, really Rythian was terrible, an awful mentor, couldn’t even give his apprentice the attention and knowledge she clearly needs, and just LETS HER SUFFER and SLOWLY FADE, doing NOTHING TO STOP, because he's a COWARD. What a terrible mage, a terrible friend. Truly Zoey deserved better. Not that he’d really be a better choice, he could pretend, but he knew they’d end up crawling back together, it’s not like anything could keep him and Nano from each other for long. Even if Zoey deserved better.

He cheerfully dodged her interests and set about crafting a gun, a gun for a dinosaur, hm past Lalna would have been thrilled, the dinosaur also seemed a bit familiar but hey what does he know. He acted how he knew he was supposed to act, cheerful if a bit distrusting, he didn’t want to drive her away after all, she’d be safe in his castle, plus it’d rub it in Rythian’s face, oh the hate Rythian would feel at the thought that stupid flux mad scientist, the dangerous warped scientist who broke respawn, was doing a better job protecting her then he could, ha.

He handed over his laser to her, that, he didn’t know why, he did never use it though, so he didn’t really think it over, it was, kinda nice talking to someone, but he knew it wouldn’t last, besides he preferred to be alone, alone was safer for everyone. It was almost easy to forget he was explaining things to a stranger, not to Nano as he talked about his forcefield, but he didn’t forget, he couldn’t forget. So he just kept playing his part.

This went on for a few hours, but soon, his moment of true reckoning began, and Rythian had fallen into his forcefield trap. He hoped this would be short, that he could get Rythian away before he truly gave into his anger, his one mercy, Nano would be proud. That changed, though, when he started talking, and his anger grew into a full blown rage in his chest.

Retribution????? Justice????? What a laugh! Everyone was fine, no one lost anything real, nothing tangible, what Rythian were you upset that you lost a few pieces of wood?? Pathetic. He kept his cool though, nothing would be achieved if he lost his top, worst of all Rythian might just start pitying him instead, and augh he hated pity.

He bantered with him, shoved it off on Sjin, and he knew Rythian was buying it, buying his faux calm. He internally aughed as he kept going, if no one else cares Rythian, that means that maybe they understand things more, that maybe you’re just a mad man screaming about a loss of a base, that everyone’s long past. He couldn’t resist name-dropping Zoey.

Oh how Rythian’s face just fell, oh yes it felt good, a sadistic glee curling in his chest, the pain in his eyes. Rythian always thought his eyes were guarded but it was so easy to pry them open into pure emotion. Rythian truly did understand nothing about this world, about respawn, about being a mentor, and about love. He wasn’t even the one who killed him, Sjin did that.

He rubbed his face as Rythian just kept going on and on about murder, bullshit that was. Utter bullshit, he’d only murdered one person and that wasn’t Rythian that’s for sure, Rythian dared to equate his minor inconvenience of respawn to what happened to her? Bastard. Murder no one comes back from, murder permanetly erases people. If Rythian had been murdered, this conversation wouldn’t even be happening.

Rythian hurled accusations of him, accusations of evil, of planned cruelty, of going down the same path, all from what? A force field designed to keep a clearly vengeance driven mage away? The fact he had a castle? Really at this point Lalna was pretty sure at this point everything he would ever do to Rythian, could easily be ruled self defense. He let himself smile, good, the nuke was already planted anyways, he got bored and it was too easy, sure he hadn’t armed it yet, it originally was supposed to be an empty threat but he could do that later. He brought it up, see how far enraged he could make this mage, a new project really, an experiment, and he was a scientist after all, sure it had been a bit, but he was.almost curious.

Smirking he went on and on about how he just needed insurance, that he can’t get rid of it, and loved the horror in his eyes, sure he couldn’t really feel emotions, hadn’t for what, a year now? Making others feel them though he found? Was pretty close of a substitute though, he liked that substitute, made him feel warmer, he poked fun at a mage fish take, and watched Rythian desperately try and make his way out, how silly, how fun, it felt good to have control, as he ignored Rythian’s edgy talk about trust.

Seeing Rythians face at the comment about him eating grass, he rushed in for the kill, talking about how he didn't know how he’d get Rythian food, not that food mattered either, a lack of food wouldn’t kill him, he knew that one personally, not eating would hinder you greatly, but alas, you’d live. Food was just one of many luxuries in this world, enjoying the horrified and sick look Rythian gave him, a face one would only make at one truly evil, that was wrong though, Rythian didn’t understand evil. Never met evil, he was just a child, a child whose mad his sandcastle got kicked, never felt true heartbreak, spoken to any truly rotten, he was just, too big for his britches. He wandered off, planning to return in a few hours, he hoped Rythian had noticed it was easy to shut off the forcefield, it was never meant to be permanent after all, like he said, talk, in safety of forcefield, that was all.

He rubbed his face but couldn’t stop a mad grin when he found Rythian gone a few hours later, escaped, seemed he knew more about tech then he let on, good, it’d be too easy if he just let himself be caught forever, that’d be boring, no that’s not what he wanted. He’d make Rythian understand Retribution and Justice, he’d make him learn what it means to lose it all, what it means to truly feel pain and sorrow and loss. To truly understand. He felt so good reveling in Rythian's emotions, he wanted more! He wanted to truly be the scientist he knows he is and finally research into what breaks apart respawn, what sets a skeleton’s arrow apart from an explosion to kill Mother.

Alas poor Zoey though, she didn’t deserve what he was planning, to be in pain, to understand what he feels. This wasn’t about her though, and Nano didn’t deserve what Mother planned either. The fiery ones just always seemed to be the ones to burn out the fastest, what a shame, this story would not have no happy ending, his didn’t, and Rythian wasn’t allowed his either, and maybe it’d prompt the endermage to teleport him to hell.

Lalna couldn’t wait to find out what was going to happen next as he put on his favorite sapphire necklace.

#Rythian #Lalna #Flux Buddies #Blackrock Chronicles #Suicide Ideation #Flux Buddies Spoilers #Zoeya #Yogscast

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starbudspresents · 7 years ago

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DGM225 - Translation Notes

It’s (finally) that time again! After six long months, we have a new chapter to chew on, and it’s more than half a dozen pages long. One could weep. :’P

I’d like to thank the StarBuds team for working so hard and so enthusiastically with me on this. You guys are my heroes. (@krorys, @shinylyni, @togaochi, and our very welcome new friend @1000glaceons) Read the chapter HERE!

Now: if you’re so inclined, please venture below the cut for some notes on our translation choices and the inevitable untranslatable odds and ends.

☽ ☾

1.) As discussed in the last few chapters, the word I've been translating as "connection" here is 因縁 innen, which has a wide range of potential meanings: fate, destiny, tie, bond, connection, origin, pretext, justification, even the Buddhist concept of "hetu and prataya" (the direct causes and indirect conditions underlying each event). Some of those obviously don't work in context, but the rest were a tossup. I went with what I felt was the safest guess; if that connection turns out to be a destiny, I can clarify that later. :P

2.) I pondered Wisely's "voice" long and hard. He speaks in an old, humble sort of way, like everyone's mild-mannered grandpa. That serves as a reminder that his memories go back a much longer way than his apparent age would suggest. He is old in a way that very few characters in this are. (Road might be the only living match for him, if she is indeed still the first incarnation of the Dream memory, but that’s still no better than a guess.)

3.) So we have a glimpse of Bookman in captivity, presumably shortly before he made his escape, and the reveal that Bookman's escape was due to Wisely's actions in some way. Either Wisely did something that made the risks of an escape attempt worth it for Bookman, or he actually helped Bookman get free. Considering Wisely's nature, I've guessed that previous incarnations might have known the Bookmen, and possibly even this Bookman. If so, did he let a friend go out of sentimentality? Or did he just slip up and create an opportunity? Once again, every answer we get gives rise to five more questions.

4.) Then there's Wisely's annoyingly cryptic comment on Tyki's search for answers: - ワタシから聞かずとも、ジョイド、おぬしはいずれ思い知るの。。。飲み込まれよう　そして引き摺られ - watashi kara kikazu tomo, Joido, onushi wa izure omoishiru no... nomikomare you, soshite hikizurare

More literally translated: Even if you don’t hear it from me, Joido, you’ll realize on your own... as if engulfed, then forcibly dragged. So Tyki’s going to find out how he's connected to Nea whether he wants to or not, and knowing that is going to drag him off the course his life has taken so far, but to where? No idea. We only know that it will change things for him, somehow.

5.) The next couple of pages had me clutching my chest and wheezing hoarsely amid a tumult of complicated emotions. Mana's confused, desperate yearning! Nea's seemingly contradictory murderous love! All of... that. THAT. AUGH.

6.) Tyki accepts responsibility in part for the Earl getting away from him and Wisely and then finding his way to Nea. Since what's done is done, though, Tyki thinks maybe he can get some answers directly from the source, rather than from a tight-lipped (and now escaped) Bookman. So he extends the most fraught invitation to tea in the history of the world. I’m going to bet he didn’t ask anyone else’s opinion on that idea first because... uh.

7.) Wisely and the Earl head out, and meanwhile, Link hits Fiidora with half an arsenal of arcane techniques all at once. Fii-tan, understandably, cries uncle. He didn't attack Link out of malice, he just needed to get the Earl free, and once that was done he had no beef remaining. He's... odd. Almost childlike, in an unsettling way. Very laid back, as Link noted. Naturally I love him.

8.) Speaking of Link, both of those spells were new!

"Needlebeak" is written 嘴針, an invented compound of the kanji for "beak" and "needle(s)", is read shibari, which is homophonous with the word for "binding," 縛り shibari. Good old Hoshino-sensei and her wordplay.

"Hundred-Feather Drill" is written 百羽錬成 (Hyappa Rensei), and is pretty literal. That's drill as in train, practice, rehearse, by the way; almost as if summoning a hundred feathers for a hundred different purposes was a practice technique he managed to weaponize. Wouldn't put it past him.

"The Hundredth: Deny" is a funny one. It's written 百式：禁 (Hyakushiki: Kin) but read Hakushiki: Kinji according to the furigana. The furigana reading is therefore very likely to be another play on words, but this one’s a bit beyond me, possibly.

The kanji on their own mean "hundred," "formula/style/ceremony," and "ban/prohibition." I went with "Hundreth" instead of "Hundred Styles" because it's almost certainly part of the Hundred-Feather Drill, and shiki is an older adjective suffix. So, this is the hundredth feather of the drill, and its purpose is prohibition/rejection/denial. “Deny” sounded cooler than “prohibition” and was less easy to mistake for Japanese than “ban,” so.

As for the furigana reading of that final kanji (kinji rather than the correct kin): there are a number of possible meanings for kinji, including "approximation" (aka. "-ish"), "recent events" and "attendance (upon someone)."

With that in mind, it occurred to me that hakushiki, if heard aloud, would normally be assumed to mean "extensive/profound knowledge." Following that, the only meaning for kinji that makes sense is "recent events." Which leaves us with Extensive Knowledge: Recent Events no Jutsu. I can't guarantee this is definitely the joke she was making, but I chewed on it for easily two hours and this was the best I came up with. If any of you happen to know what reference she was making here, by all means let me know, haha.

9.) Aaaaaand there goes Nea, doing the most idiotically reckless thing he possibly could... unless he knows something about how Innocence works that the others don't. He doesn't seem all that worried that it's going to devour him and self-destruct by way of the Fall — I doubt he'd do this just because he's mildly annoyed about a nickname if he thought that was a likely consequence at all — but why not?

(Translating his lines in this scene were the most fun I've had in forever, incidentally, and I hope it shows. He’s like an apoplectic kitty, hissing and scratching without actually doing any damage whatsoever thus far. I love him.)

10.) Teeechnically Nea just says "eat food with you?" but Fiidora mentioned teatime earlier so I took a little creative liberty in order to get Nea's withering tone across properly. FUCK YO CRUMPETS

11.) "Back-from-the-dead guise" is awkward as fuck, I know, but bear with me. What he said in the raws was 天性したおまえのその姿, tenseishita omae no sono sugata. Tensei is straight-up reincarnation; the transmigration of souls, the cycle of rebirth, all that. The rest says "that form of yours." We don't really say "form" in English that way, and Nea's very glib, so I went with "back-from-the-dead guise" because Nea's implying that Tyki is wearing his own God-given face like it’s a costume of someone dead and gone. Which it is. Nea’s not too chuffed about seeing his old face prancing around on some oblivious baby Noah, clearly.

12.) Re: the next panel: holy cake-baking christ

(@Noah: consider calming ur tit perhaps)

13.) Our very own Inspector Obvious, Howard Link, explains to Nea what a terrible goddamn idea this is, and Nea thanks him with -- wait for it -- MORE SARCASM. Link then announces that he will exhaust his strength attempting to stop Nea from doing this STUPID, STUPID thing. (The raws say 力尽く, which means "with all one's might" in the dictionary but the kanji literally say "strength + entirely exhaust," so. He intends a no-holds-barred takedown here. If there were any folding metal chairs around he’d be going for them.)

14.) haha oh god here we go, where's the kleenex, fuck

15.) So now we know what the time difference was like for Allen: he took Johnny's hand back there in the inn, but has only just now actually managed to emerge, and as far as he knows it's been no time at all. Wonder how long he'll manage to stay on the horse this time? (Hopefully, at least long enough to get to the Campbell mansion and find Katerina, as per Cross' suggestion.)

16.) I don't really have a lot to say about the next few pages except that I sobbed my way through translating what few lines there were. THEY HAVE SUCH A LOVE. Also Johnny is a reckless idiot, what was he planning to do?? Cushion Allen's landing with his own body?? Actually now that I think about it that's probably exactly what he intended. Fuck that, no, bye.

17.) That one page with the huge untranslated sound effect is noted in our translation gdoc as [Johnny screaming across entire page] and that was a general #mood for the whole job tbh.

18.) MORE EMOTIONS, SOBBING, WEEPING, ETC.

19.) Tiny note: the MS scanlation has Allen's little comment in response to Johnny's head-hug as "heavy" and I chose "can't breathe," but they both suit the purpose well enough. The raw just said くるしい kurushii, an expression of pain/discomfort which could have been due to either the weight or the smothering or both. :P

20.) Speaking of pain: ow @ Link’s face in that last panel. He got one thing he wanted (Allen's victory, snatched even from the teeth of defeat, a ray of hope for him re: his own probable future as Nea's next vessel) but lost something else he needed (Nea in control, so that Link might conspire with him and carry out Lvellie's commands). He's still torn, and not getting mended any. Wonder how long he'll manage to keep balancing on that knife's edge.

That's about it, I think! If anyone wants more kanji/kana transcriptions from the raws so they can double-check things for themselves, I'll be happy to provide them! I may also be open to answering meta questions here, though I'm currently on hiatus on my main. :)

Hope you've all enjoyed our release of this long-awaited and suitably glorious chapter! Please stick with us as we work to get the Re:Gray project (full rescanlation from the beginning, with the benefit of all we've learned so far!) off the ground. It's going to be fun, I promise. ♥

♦ panthaleia

#dgm225 #dgm meta #panthaleia #dgm #d gray man

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