#hope this perfectly sensible sequence of events helps <3< /div>
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I'm so sorry, but how did my boy Cyborg turn into a planet??
Phew, okay, it's been a minute since I've read it all, but let's see if I can still do this. Because obviously we are taking the long way through this explanation.
A History of How Cyborg Became a Planet
Once upon a time in 1980, Cyborg was introduced in New Teen Titans as the cyborg we all know and love, and remained as such for about a decade.
Then he got blown up and lost much of his memory in the terrible Titans Hunt storyline, and subsequently ended up far more like a lifeless robot and less like a person for a very long and awful stretch of comics. Eventually it was determined he was still alive in there (yay), but was basically trapped inside a fully mechanical shell, unable to do anything beyond mechanical responses and only sometimes aware of things around him (aw).
Then Technis appeared--a moving computer planet slash dying cybernetic hivemind in need of...souls to assimilate or something? Look, I do not remember the technicalities of this very old comic, but essentially Technis determined that Cyborg, being compatibly machine-like but also with a soul, was exactly what they needed to adapt and survive.
Good news: they can finally help Vic to not be trapped in his own body and be a person again. Bad news: turns out he's in a bad place anyway and won't be able to sustain power (i.e. survive) if he leaves Technis. Vic gets absorbed into the cybernetic hive mind planet, and they fly off into the space sunset. Vic's last appearance for a couple years is New Titans #107.
(this is how the comic gives a tragic and heartfelt goodbye to Cyborg...with his face weirdly formed on the computer-planet's surface)
Now I hear you crying foul, because Vic is only a part of a hive mind that occupies a computer planet here, and not really a planet himself. Don't worry. I'm getting there. He's gonna be a totally different planet.
Technis and Vic reappear in the run's final storyline (New Titans #127-130), where we find out Vic has been reborn in an energy construct body and is going by Cyberion.
(that’s him, the black and red man with glowing eyes and cyber-dreads)
Blah blah dramatic storyline here. Technis gets destroyed, but Vic/Cyberion decides to stay in space, following Technis's old directive to explore and rebuild. Gar (a.k.a. Changeling, a.k.a. Beast Boy) stays with him, and the pair stop appearing in comics for another couple years as they do things in space.
However! Gar reappears without Vic towards the end of Teen Titans vol 2, having apparently left his best friend because things started getting too weird...
Cue JLA/Titans (a mini I genuinely enjoyed, for the record) where a strange planet made of debris from ruined worlds comes to earth, interrupting computer systems, kidnapping Titans left and right, and absorbing the moon into itself for strange and esoteric reasons that seem to convey an unexpected sense of loneliness and...okay, yeah, it’s Vic.
(a portrait of a man)
You see, Gar left because Vic was getting a little too into the Technis drive to reassemble/repopulate after his hivemind space family’s destruction. He got his hands on a mech suit made out of fully morphable metal, which he took over rather than remain an energy construct. And as he collected materials around the galaxy, he absorbed them into his new body, collecting more and more, growing larger and larger, trying to recreate the Planet Technis until, you know. Planet Cyberion.
And that’s how Cyborg became a planet!
#then they tricked him back into the golden moldable mech suit and he was a person again#then he reappeared (without any explanation i've ever been able to find) as a silver cyborg again#literally don't know how that happened#but by then the animated show came out and his look became iconic so he no longer goes through crazy major changes#victor stone#cyborg#titans#teen titans#dc#dc comics#dc ref#*#*dc#hope this perfectly sensible sequence of events helps <3#ask#nohva
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AMBITION Season 3 ♫ “Can You Dig It?” [ 3.07 ]
CREATED BY Esther (waterstribe) & Maggie (quincywillows) || Official Page || AO3
STAYIN’ ALIVE – After an unfortunate accident, the A class finds themselves working double time to fund their showdown performance. Charlie struggles to balance the past and the present, and Maya makes a desperate move. Farkle receives news that changes his life forever.
70 Minutes (33K words) || No content warnings apply.
[ ← The Comfort Zone ] [ S3 Synopsis ] [ Moment of Truth → ]
( Follow along with the music on Spotify here! )
EXT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY
Music plays over the sound system, setting a comfortable and fun scene while most of the A class works together on the auditorium stage. The performers are working through showdown choreography or helping put the finishing touches on set pieces for the production, while the techies are split between those set pieces, the beginning of structures for their upcoming winter musical, and tweaking the lights. JEFF MONROE is up on the catwalk out of sight, NATE MARTINEZ perched on top of a scaffolding and passing him requested tools. DAVE WILLIAMS is balancing on a ladder against the scaffolding, helping hand things to Nate from below.
MAYA HART has taken over as dance captain, shouting commands at her classmates still running through steps. ZAY BABINEAUX watches from on top of the major set piece they’re building at center stage for the musical, unimpressed and maybe a bit envious. His injured left leg is now in a boot, wheelchair gone.
The conversation varies, from the impending showdown finals to college application deadlines. Everything is coming down the pipeline at record speed, right towards them, and they have to juggle it all at once. RILEY MATTHEWS glances around and asks where Jade is, which ISADORA DE LA CRUZ answers.
Isadora: She’s been locked up in the costume loft basically since last week. The deadline for her conservatory and apprenticeship programs is closing in, so she’s been working basically non-stop.
Maya: How does she not have enough samples already? Hasn’t she made everything we’ve ever worn in this school for the last three years?
A fair question, but it doesn’t get addressed. They’re all distracted by a new song coming on shuffle, playing loudly over the speakers.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Boogie Wonderland” as performed by Earth, Wind & Fire || Instrumental
Although the track is an undeniable bop, the assembled A class seniors don’t seem impressed. They all quickly pipe up to complain, calling for someone to skip it.
Darby: Where’s Jeff? Jeff! Hit skip!
Jeff, from above: A little busy right now!
Maya: Well someone better go change it!
Haley: And risk getting killed by Lucas because we dared enter the booth? No thanks.
Maya: Fair point. Riley, go change it.
Riley, in the midst of rolling paint on a set piece, raises her free arm in a shrug. Also a little busy. Zay shakes his head.
Zay: What is wrong with all of you? None of you have taste. Disco is classic. You should respect the excellence that came before you.
Maya: Sorry I’m not still living in the 20th century. It’s 2020, Zayby. Disco is dead.
Zay: You absolutely disgust me. If my foot wasn’t booted --
NIGEL CHEY finally relents amidst all their complaints, claiming he’ll risk his life to go change it if it will get them all to shut up.
For now, though, the boogie wonderland is ongoing. FARKLE MINKUS uses the opportunity to pick on Isadora, loosely disco grooving around her and trying to poke her into joining him. She laughs but tells him to cut it out, and when he gets too close, she playfully shoves him away.
Only she’s stronger than she looks, and he’s a beanpole, so she overshoots and pushes him a bit too hard. Farkle goes stumbling backwards -- right into the ladder that’s holding up Dave. Isadora yanks Farkle back just as the ladder falls out from under Dave, just missing Nigel, clattering to the stage next to them and creating a dent.
Dance! Boogie wonderland!
A bunch of the seniors cry out, scrambling away, now watching in horror as Dave dangles from the side of the scaffolding a dozen or so feet above the ground. He almost loses his grip, seconds from falling, and Maya screams. She backs away frantically and knocks into a paint can, spilling metallic silver paint all over their perfectly crisp black stage and splattering CLARISSA CRUZ, DARBY WINTERS, and SARAH CARLSON.
Ah! Ah! Dance!
Jeff and a couple of performers start shouting directives at Dave, trying to save him from a nasty fall off the scaffolding. Nate tries to pull him up, but it’s no use -- Dave is the giant after all, and Nate’s guns aren’t that swoll. Riley hides behind her hands, peeking through her fingers and unable to look away.
Riley: Oh my God, he’s gonna die.
Isadora takes over directing from below, instructing Dave to change trajectory and aim for the curtains to orient himself. Jeff objects to that, citing the integrity of the curtain pulley system, but he’s shouted down by the performers jumping on Isadora’s suggestion. Suddenly, everyone is yelling at Dave to go for the curtains, so that’s what he does.
Jeff: No, don’t -- !
All… the… love in the world can’t be gone!
Dave manages to latch onto the main curtain -- but it’s all downhill from there. That curtain is about as useless as Nate, and the pulley system holding it upright can only sustain so much weight (curtains are a lot heavier than they look). So the moment Dave latches on, it buckles underneath him, and seconds later the whole thing comes down in a spectacular show of destruction.
The A class scatters to avoid it, ducking down and covering their heads. Clarissa pulls HALEY FISHER down behind a set piece with her for cover; Farkle yanks Isadora out of the way and shields her behind him. Zay screws his eyes shut and hides behind his knee, thankfully a safe distance away. Then the dust settles, stunned silence giving way to the continuing groovy sounds of Earth, Wind, & Fire.
Riley pokes her head out from behind the set piece she was painting first, eyeing the heap of curtains and rods on the dented stage floor. She swallows.
Riley: … Dave?
For a moment, nothing but tense silence… from above, Nate releases a gasp.
Nate: Holy shit, we’ve killed him.
Then Dave emerges, pushing some dense drapery off of him and pushing himself into a sitting position. He seems dazed, but otherwise uninjured.
Jeff: Oh, thank God.
Isadora: Dave… you good buddy?
Dave blinks, then offers a thumbs up. Everyone releases a sigh of relief… just as SHAWN HUNTER and HARPER BURGESS enter into the scene of chaos, having rushed in after hearing the commotion from down the hall. In the opposite wings, LUCAS JAMES FRIAR returns with DYLAN ORLANDO and ASHER GARCIA, all of whom stop dead in their tracks when they set their eyes on the disaster they’ve stumbled into. Asher’s jaw drops open; Dylan drops the toolbox he was carrying.
Whoopsie. Boogie wonderland…
From his perch atop the set piece, Zay breaks the silence, shaking his head.
Zay: Shoulda never dissed disco.
Cue title sequence.
INT. AAA - JACK’S OFFICE - DAY
JACK HUNTER is seated at his desk, working to maintain a neutral composure as HARRISON YANCY paces his office. He’s haughty and on offense, demanding to know what happened with the auditorium and grilling Jack for details. Of all the things he planned to tangle with at Adams, vandalism and destruction of school property was not at the top of the list.
Yancy: But, then, I suppose I should’ve anticipated such a turn of events. Considering you’ve struggled with reining in destruction before, and insisted so vehemently on keeping problematic entities in your student roll -- and now they’re student leadership, in fact!
Jack: He had nothing to do with this. Lucas wasn’t even in the auditorium when it happened --
Yancy: How convenient for him.
Jack: And it was an accident. No ill intent involved. It was an accident, and all of the damage is repairable. The curtains can be fixed and replaced, the dents in the stage can be filled, and the spilled paint can be removed or painted over in turn. I think we should be more concerned with the lucky reality that no one was hurt.
Yancy: [ ignoring that point ] The damage is repairable, yes, but it won’t be free. And I certainly won’t approve its reparation on the school’s dime.
Jack points out that such a decision isn’t his to make -- he’s still the principal of Adams. And that’s true enough, but as Yancy effortlessly counters, he remains under close watch. That’s the reason Yancy is present in the first place. Every decision Jack makes is under scrutiny, and a figurative nod of approval from him matters. Jack must be wise enough to realize that.
Jack, begrudgingly: So what, then?
Yancy: So, it seems to me that the A class will have to proffer the money to pay for the damages on their own.
Jack: That’s ridiculous. They’re students, not entrepreneurs. And they’re already scrambling to raise money for their showdown performance, not to mention ways to bolster their scholarship initiative since you voted to deny them funding at the board level.
Yancy: Then they must be experts at it. What’s one more money-making effort? At least it’s teaching them meaningful life skills -- budgeting, consequences, the value of a dollar. All very sensible lessons to learn… something you used to complain this institution lacked at the same time you were decrying the actions of students you now fruitlessly defend, if I recall correctly.
Well, you got him there, Yancy. Jack deflates, knowing there’s no logical path out of this. Yancy has him cornered, and the more he invites reminders about how he used to be or the ways he’s already fumbled, the graver his prospects grow. Yancy emphasizes this as he makes his exit.
Yancy: We at the board used to hold you in high esteem, Jackson. We saw great things in your future. Now, with all these foolish mistakes... let’s hope that all your promise hasn’t dissolved with the Hunter I used to know.
The threat is buried deep beneath the thinly-veiled condescension, hidden in a simple choice of plural. Mistakes. This battle is just one in a long, growing list Yancy is keeping against him.
Like he could ever forget it. Jack releases a heavy sigh after Yancy leaves his office, slouching in his chair.
Lucas, pre-lap: I shouldn’t be surprised. This might as well happen.
INT. AAA - TECHNICIAN’S BOOTH - DAY
Riley listens attentively as Lucas paces the booth, busying himself with gathering stuff for class for the sake of moving. Although his tone is sarcastic and indifferent, the weight of his words indicates he’s far from it.
Lucas: It’s not like I don’t already have enough to focus on, between the usual bullshit and the fundraising for showdown -- a showdown that we have to win if we want any chance of the scholarship thing actually taking off. That on top of the college applications I wasn’t planning on doing three months ago but now have to make really good, because suddenly I have dreams or whatever, even though I’m basically the most rejectable candidate on the east coast.
Riley: Okay, you know that’s not true.
Lucas: Fine. Most rejectable candidate in the greater Manhattan area.
Riley: You literally won an election.
Lucas: And the world is still wondering how and why.
Riley rolls her eyes, but she is sympathetic. She agrees that the stage accident was definitely an unexpected speed bump on everything they’ve got going on, but they’ll figure out how to handle it. There’s no way it’s going to be entirely on them, anyway, and they don’t even know how much damage was actually done yet.
She takes the opportunity to broach another topic, though, easing into a deeper conversation about college. She asks how his applications are going, which he claims are fine, in spite of the stress surrounding it.
Lucas: The only stuff I’ve got left are recommendations and personal essays. And I know I’m fucked on the recs considering you’re supposed to ask for those months in advance, and I know no one impressive, least of all who would sing my praises.
Riley: You could always ask my dad for a recommendation. I’m sure he’d have glowing things to say. Instant acceptance, I bet.
Lucas, flatly: You are hilarious. It’s no mystery how you managed to reel me in.
Riley: Well, that and my effortless charm and insanely dazzling visage.
Lucas gives her a look, but to be fair, he doesn’t argue her on it. She simply beams in response, sliding closer to him and halting his pacing by taking his hands.
Lucas: Honestly, I’m not really stuck on the recommendations. I think I’m going to ask Joe for one, because he can at least speak to my work ethic or whatever, and the other… I mean, it’s whatever. I’ll figure it out.
Riley: But…?
Lucas: But… I don’t know. With the rest of the app…
It’s clear there’s something else he’s really stuck on. Riley starts to offer him advice, or maybe just encouragement, but they’re interrupted by a knock on the booth door. Jeff appears moments later at the stairs.
Jeff: Class is starting. Judgment day is upon us.
Lucas and Riley share an apprehensive look, then follow the lighting technician out of the booth.
INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY
Harper, Shawn, and ERIC MATTHEWS are on the stage, assessing the damage while the A class gathers in the front and center section. The destroyed curtain has been removed, the pock marks in the stage even more visible in its absence.
ANGELA MOORE emerges from the wings, Janitor HARLEY KEINER in tow. She’s just barely starting to show her pregnancy, but the flowy tops she’s wearing now conceal it fairly well.
Harley: Old curtain’s out back. Trash company will be by this afternoon to take it away.
Angela: I have to say, I picked a great day to stop by and visit. Never a dull moment.
Harper: Girl, tell me about it.
Angela laughs knowingly. Been there, queen. Eric and Shawn turn their attention to the seniors, coming towards the front of the stage.
Eric: Who wants to explain what exactly happened?
A whole bunch of them immediately launch into retellings, talking over each other and definitely exaggerating elements of the story. The camera jumps around to each of them, catching snippets of their perspective.
Sarah: If Jeff had just changed the song --
Jeff: I was in the catwalk!
Nate: So Jeff’s up in the catwalk, and Dave is handing me shit -- I mean, uh, stuff -- on the scaffolding --
Darby: Isadora pushed Farkle --
Isadora: I lightly nudged Farkle --
Maya: Farkle is like a house of cards and all it takes is a little wind to knock him over, so he goes flying into the ladder --
Clarissa: Paint splatters --
Yindra: The ladder goes crashing down and nearly takes off Nigel’s head --
Jade: Oh my God, what?
Nigel, pointedly: No, it did not. [ softer, to Jade ] No, it didn’t.
Yindra: It did.
Haley: Not like the curtains almost took out Dave!
Yogi: This class is a circus act.
Eric holds up a hand to halt them all, waving them down. He can’t figure out what any of them are saying when they all talk at once, so he asks for a volunteer to give the rundown. A few hands up go up, but Eric wisely selects Zay.
He pulls himself to his feet, gingerly, for the effect. Then he clears his throat, speaking plainly and matter-of-fact.
Zay: Farkle got knocked into the ladder. Ladder falls, dents stage. Dave almost falls, Nate is no help --
Nate: Whoa, okay then. Hater.
Zay: Maya stumbles back and knocks silver paint can over. Performers tell Dave to grab curtain, Jeff objects --
Jeff: Justice. Thank you.
Zay: Dave does anyway, whole thing comes down. Also, no one in this class has taste and for that they evoked the wrath of God. But apparently God can’t kill Dave Williams.
Dylan: So metal.
Eric: Thank you, Zay.
Zay does a pithy salute, lowering back into his seat. Harper goes on to explain the total damages done by the incident as well as relay the total cost of the repairs -- without saying a definitive sum, suffice to say it’s not cheap.
The A class immediately breaks into chatter again, trying to divert blame off themselves. Shawn notices one student doesn’t seem particularly vexed -- in fact, he appears to be laughing to himself behind his hand.
Shawn: I’m sorry, Friar, do you find this funny?
Lucas: What? Oh, no, no. Very serious business. [ clearing his throat ] It’s just… it’s so nice to not be the one responsible for once.
The performers immediately boo him. He simply smiles. CHAI FRESCO is the one who manages to redirect the conversation.
Chai: What exactly is he doing here?
All eyes turn to Janitor Harley, who stands sheepishly next to the faculty. Harper says she’s glad Chai asked, claiming that if anyone deserves an apology for what they did today, it would be him. He puts a lot of effort and care into maintaining their sacred space, this auditorium, and the damage done today walks all over that.
Darby: It really was an accident.
Harley: No hard feelings, Miss Winters. Mighty nice as it was for Harper and Shawn to invite me here, rest assured I know there was no ill intent or disrespect. And I can assure you that with the time and proper resources, we will return this stage to tip-top shape in no time.
Maya: Lovely. Problem solved then, no?
Eric: Not quite. You do still have an assignment to attend to, especially as it’s your last major one before finals.
Harper: Since it is a weird time in the calendar and we don’t want to barrel another assignment next week right before showdown, Shawn and I agreed that this assignment would be a two-week stretch, and ideally lower stakes.
Shawn: Even better now, considering how you all just doubled pressure on your own.
Harper: And since you’ve also in turn given Harley more pressure and work to attend to in this time, we thought it only fair that he decide your focus for the project.
With that, they pass the floor over to Harley again to make his declaration. The performers don’t seem all that unnerved -- it’s Harley Keiner. What’s the worst he could do? Clean-up anthems? He clears his throat, clasping his biker-gloved hands together.
Harley: When I’m in a particularly rough spot, or working through a grueling task, I have always found that a little music can really liven the task.
Yogi: [ under his breath ] Clean up, clean up, everybody everywhere…
Harley: But nothing gets me more fired up, ready to take on a challenge or dance to the beat, than some classic tunes from my early youth. And I’ll tell you kids, no one knew music better than the radio hits of my day.
Slowly, the possibility begins to dawn on the A class what decree awaits them. Dylan is counting backwards on his fingers, trying to calculate just how old Harley actually is, but Asher next to him has beaten him to it.
Asher: Oh no.
Harley: Ladies and gentleboys, we’ll be taking it back to the ‘70s this week for your musical assignments.
Dun dun dun. The A class expresses their obvious disdain. Well, all except Zay, who cracks a smug grin.
Zay: Heh heh… karma.
There’s only more grim news. Considering the stage is going to be undergoing repairs thanks to all this, they’re all essentially ousted from the auditorium for the time being. No sense practicing or rehearsing in a space that’s going to be under construction. JADE BEAMON sits up straighter, shooting her hand in the air.
Jade: We can still access the lofts, right? Like, I can get in the costume loft --
Eric: Yes, all the technical spaces, as well as the dressing rooms, are still fair game. But stay away from the stage.
Harper: And you might not get much work done when they’re doing things like drilling and hammering, so be forewarned.
Haunting… Jade hides in her hands, already stressed. Nigel tentatively pats her on the shoulder.
So yeah, all in all, some unideal circumstances right before some of the most important events of their high school career.
INT. AAA - CAFETERIA - DAY
Maya is in surprisingly good spirits in spite of the financial issues confronting the class, preening and showing off Valerie’s faux fur coat. She wears it effortlessly, entertaining Darby, Sarah, and a crop of underclassmen at a table as she shares the tale of her and Valerie’s instant starlit bond. When Darby reaches out to feel the coat, Maya quickly smacks her hand away.
Maya: You’re welcome and encouraged to look, but no touchie. Golden diva rule.
A couple of tables over, Riley and Isadora watch her showboating with amusement. Riley claims it was really generous of Isadora to give her the coat, but she shrugs it off.
Isadora: Seriously, she’s way more at home in it than I would ever be. Can you ever see me pulling that off?
Riley: I think you can deliver any design you endeavor, you know that. [ off her raised eyebrow ] But yeah, a bit out of your element. Ironically, maybe.
Isadora: Even that’s a stretch. But it really wasn’t a hard decision. As much as it inflates her ego, my mom did see something in her. Maya can use it as a bragging tool all she wants, and people probably won’t believe her because of it, but they probably would be in cahoots if Val were still here. [ a beat ] A lot of things were going to happen if she were here.
Oof. Riley senses the gloom impending, searching for a quick change of subject. She asks if Isadora found anything else cool in the boxes from the estate.
Isadora pauses, mouth parted open. The answer is plenty -- including the mystery hidden way deep down underneath everything else. But for whatever reason, she hesitates explaining what she found.
Thankfully, she doesn’t have to respond anyway. Dylan swoops into their conversation, dropping down into the seat next to Riley and smacking a piece of paper onto the table. It’s a flyer for scheme one of their fundraising efforts: a community dance, now officially ‘70s themed. Isadora turns it around to get a better look at the very bright poster.
Dylan: Hot off the presses, ladies. Another instant classic from the one and only ambassador of public relational fun and enthusiasm, comma right hand advisor, comma prime minister of the techies and secretary of kissing, mainly to the secretary and official marketing and communications director for the Friar administration.
Isadora: Colorful…
Dylan: Shout-out to Harley for basically choosing our theme for us. We’d been sitting on it for ages because Asher and Maya kept fighting over it.
Isadora: Really? What theme ideas could possibly be worth scrapping over?
Dylan: Nothing. Neither of them actually had an idea. I think they just automatically hate anything that comes out of the others’ mouth.
Isadora: Wow, just like a real body politic.
Riley excitedly swipes the flyer, praising Dylan for his enthusiastic design. She snaps a picture of it on her phone and explains she’s texting it to Charlie.
Riley: I’m so pumped for this. Disco isn’t my favorite thing, but it is fun.
Dylan: Bouncy.
Isadora: Jaunty.
Dylan: Ooh, thesaurus bonus.
Dylan and Isadora exchange a quick high five. Riley beams at them, then continues.
Riley: Besides, with how extremely crazy everything is right now between college apps and showdown and now this fundraising debacle, I think it’ll give all of us some much-needed serotonin. A nice evening of… disco dopamine.
Dylan: Oh, you know you just wanna see Lucas in some sick bellbottoms.
Isadora: [ with a gag ] God… please, I’m sitting right here...
Riley shoves Dylan playfully, then reiterates the point. It will be fun. A nice, well-deserved stress reliever after working their asses off these next couple weeks.
INT. AAA - COSTUME LOFT - DAY
And boy howdy, that could not be truer for Jade. She is in full frenzy mode, skipping lunch and hunkered down in the costume loft to work. It seems like she’s been there for days, her space under the loft essentially a nest of costuming supplies, her belongings, and discarded snack containers. Her hair is a mess of tangles falling half out of a ponytail, three different tape measures are draped around her neck like graduation cords, and she’s wearing an old button up paint smock about 3 sizes too large that only exacerbates the crazed hermit energy.
Asher and Jeff listen as she multitasks on cataloguing some of her projects and marks another in progress on the table in front of her, the former visibly disconcerted by Jade’s general state of being while the latter seems mainly tickled. She speaks around a pin caught between her lips as she explains the reason for the chaos -- college applications are due right around the corner, as are apprenticeship applications, and she needs to have all her portfolio pieces in perfect condition before she hits that submit button.
Asher: Again, I know this is hypocritical coming from me, but girl you need to relax.
Jade snaps her head up to glare at him, even scarier with that pin in her mouth. She removes it to stick something down while Jeff asks her what she has left to do. Apparently, she’s just about done after days of relentless work, so she’s on her last application assignment now: pick a decade and create a sampling of as many unique -- but historically accurate -- costumes as possible in her designer’s mind.
Jade: Luckily, Janitor Harley did me the favor of having to pick a decade. If we’re doing ‘70s stuff this week anyway, then we’ll probably need costumes, so I can knock out two birds with one stone.
Jeff: I don’t know if I’d say need…
Asher: Yeah, with the auditorium boarded up for the time being I doubt we’ll be doing any major productions.
Jade: With Maya and Farkle, you can never be too careful.
Case in point, she is way too swamped to even think about the fundraising bullshit. She feels bad, but there’s no way she can split her time. Jeff and Asher assure her it’s no big deal.
Jeff: I think the performers will let you off the hook considering you’ve made… every single costume they’ve ever worn since freshman year.
Asher: Least they could do.
Jeff: Yeah. You deserve a week off!
Jeff’s turn to receive the Jade Beamon death glare. He clears his throat, scratching his ear.
Jeff: Well, you know… not for you, but...
Jade stabs the pin cushion pointedly.
Zay, pre-lap: I guess if my clear eternal damnation is good for anything, it gets me out of fundraising to fix another problem caused by Farkle and the Pips.
INT. AAA - BOYS DRESSING ROOM - DAY
Zay and Nigel are taking their lunch in the boys dressing room, both on their laptops while they eat. They’re working on finalizing college application stuff, Zay sitting on the counter with his injured foot propped up while Nigel is leaning against the mirrors on the floor.
Nigel: Guess it’s worth it then.
Zay: Ha ha, so funny. If I could afford to move, I would kill you for being such a damn comedian.
Nigel: I’m more of a tragedies man myself. [ a beat ] What are you planning to do, exactly? For the applications.
Zay: [ with a sigh ] Just putting the pieces together and hoping for the best. Thank fuck I recorded a couple runs of my routine when I was going through my obsessive drills at the start of the year.
Nigel: Glad Diva Zay was good for something.
Zay: They’re not as polished as I want, but they’ll do. Not like I have any other options. I’m just going to convince myself via self-hypnosis that they’ll see the rough edges as loose, natural charm. Between that and other samples I have from shows and recitals and West Side Story, all I can do is hope that’s enough. And if I get far enough to book an audition… I’ll be better by then.
He says it like a guarantee -- he can’t consider the alternative. Nigel isn’t sure how to respond, but he’s spared from figuring it out as they’re interrupted by YINDRA AMINO entering with a few showdown costumes to replace on the rack. All of them freeze as they glance at one another, Yindra and Zay holding one another’s gaze for a few moments longer. Then Yindra brushes past the awkwardness, shrugging and focusing on the costume rack.
Yindra: No need to go on defense, boys. I’m only here on business.
She keeps her eyes on her task. Nigel picks up the conversational slack, explaining that they were discussing their college applications. He asks how Yindra is doing in plotting her college plans, as last they talked she didn’t have much set in stone.
Yindra, matter-of-fact: I’ll be applying to a couple of schools as a safety net, but my main trajectory remains Los Angeles. The current plan right now is to skip over the bureaucracy of academics I don’t care about and go out there to start striking while the iron is hot. Talent speaks for itself.
Nigel, ever the pragmatist, still seems uneasy about such a plan, but it’s Zay who beats him to the punch. He breaks the silence between him and Yindra with a snort, tone teasing but friendly.
Zay: Straight to Los Angeles with no foundation? Now that’s just asking for trouble, and that’s coming from a diva like me. Haven’t you seen Fame?
Maybe that kind of friendly fire passes when they’re on good terms, but it falls flat now. Yindra stiffens her shoulders, giving Zay a diva glare of her own.
Yindra: [ without looking at him ] Nigel, will you please inform Zay that despite what his superiority complex might think, I’m not an idiot?
Nigel: Oh, um --
Zay: Come on, Yindra. I didn’t mean it like that.
Yindra: And Zay might find it interesting to know that my dad is considering moving to Los Angeles as well, if I plan to be out there, so I don’t see how I’m swinging with no foundation. And I’ll be using the money that we would’ve wasted on tuition for studio time to record a demo, so there is in fact a method behind the madness. Just because I’m not following the same musty, beaten path as everyone else doesn’t mean I’m not on any path at all. [ haughtily ] And even in spite of his broke attitude, I wish him all the best with his less-than-ideal circumstances. Least of all this week -- I’m sure not being able to show off while he discos is simply killing him. Thanks for letting him know, Nigel.
Nigel: … you’re welcome...
With that, Yindra spins on her heel and exits. Zay rolls his eyes, but it’s clear that the state of their friendship is really bothering him. Nigel awkwardly attempts to move past it, commenting that the two of them are about as dramatic as a Shakespearean comedy of errors before coming back to Yindra’s closing point.
Nigel: It’s a shame about this assignment though. You’re probably the only one in our class who could truly thrive this week.
Zay smiles half-heartedly, both of them focusing back on their computers. After a moment, his smile dims.
Zay: Didn’t use to be…
INT. HAVERFORD PREP - HALLWAY - DAY
CHARLIE GARDNER is at his locker, reading the texts from Riley. He pulls up the photo of the flyer for the dance fundraiser, boasting the disco theme for the end of the semester in all its groovy glory.
Yes, it is a tragedy that Charlie isn’t there to participate. Another disco gay, barred from the dance floor. It’s clear from his expression that he’s bummed about it.
He’s only pulled out of his fugue when EVAN SCOTT approaches. He pats him on the shoulder as he passes and asks if he’s ready for rehearsal. With senior showdown finals so close around the corner, Brandon is going to be drilling them more than ever. Now it’s game time for real.
Charlie nods, putting his phone away and shutting his locker to follow him. But that melancholy still lingers in his features.
INT. AAA - JACK’S OFFICE - DAY
But he’s not the only one grappling with an unideal situation. Lucas is the king of that, settled in his usual chair across from Jack, only this time he’s not alone. Maya has been called in with him, the two of them waiting uncertainly as Jack prepares to share why he brought them in.
And the reason for his apprehension is obvious once he says it. He finally breaks the news to them that the school board declined to fund their scholarship initiative -- and that’s not even the worst part.
Maya: Nothing?
Lucas: They’re not going to contribute anything?
Jack: I know, it’s disappointing. To be honest, I was anticipating at least a partial donation, but for whatever reason it was shot down wholesale. It was close, though.
Maya: Well. That’s just lovely. Could the state of the AAA union get any more despicable?
Jack: To put it simply? Yes.
Uh oh. Jack reluctantly informs them of the other bomb blowing up their administration -- that Yancy has insisted they pay for the damages to the auditorium since their class caused it. Both Lucas and Maya erupt in complaints, the latter literally leaping out of her chair and launching into a frantic pace behind it. She fans herself, taking deep breaths.
Maya: Okay. This is fine. No money, no problems. It’s fine. It’s fine!
Jack: … Miss Hart?
Maya stops behind her vacated seat, gripping the back of it. She takes in a deep breath, holds it, and releases it theatrically. Then she opens her eyes, plastering on her winning star smile.
Maya: It’s okay. Yes, everything is fine. The situation is unideal, in a word --
Lucas: More like bullshit.
Maya: Also a word. But money and I have been tussling my whole career. It won’t be getting the best of me now. We’ll come up with another way to fundraise alongside the dance social and then we will win showdown and absolutely everything will work out exactly how I want it to. It always does.
Jack: That so?
Maya: Thanks to the two powers that be, Principal Hunter -- star and will. And I’ve got both in spades. [ another breath ] Okay, damage control. Need new ideas. Gotta pool resources… brainstorm. I need to brainstorm. I’m thinking… I’m scheming...
Maya hums, entering zen diva mode as she gathers her things. She backs out of the office and assures Lucas she’ll update him as soon as she’s figured out their second moneymaker. Once she’s gone, Lucas and Jack wait a moment to let the Maya pheromones dissipate before continuing the conversation.
Jack: Say what you will about her, can’t pretend she doesn’t have moxie. An interesting choice to partner with you.
Lucas: Believe it or not -- and I’ll deny it if you tell anyone -- I think she’s the best second-in-command I could’ve picked. Somehow her brand of insanity is just right for the Minesweeper that is Triple A student government.
Hard to argue with that. Jack apologizes again for the fact that so much seems to be piling on him at once. He really did think they would get more help from the board… but they’ll keep marching on regardless. The initiative is worth fighting for, and besides, their fundraisers could really outsell their expectations. Especially with a theme like disco, their dance will probably be a smashing success. Lucas can’t help but smirk.
Lucas: Yeah, you’d know all about that, huh? Bet you were just a disco king back in your day.
Jack, flatly: How old do you think I am to have been discoing in the ‘70s?
Cheekiness notwithstanding, the prospects seem good. Not all hope is lost. Jack switches gears, checking in with how Lucas is doing on his applications with deadlines fast approaching. Lucas gives the same general response he gave Riley, tiptoeing around the challenge of the essay component and focusing on the fact that he might get it done at all. Now that it’s so close, it feels more and more daunting… not to mention all the other pressure that seems to be landing on top of him right at the same time.
Jack hears that, and dismisses Lucas so he has time to go deal with all those pressures. Before he walks out, Lucas pauses and turns back for one more thing. He struggles to articulate it since asking for any sort of help feels like specialized torture, but he manages to ask if Jack would be willing to write him a letter of recommendation for the applications. The request surprises Jack, which Lucas reads as discomfort.
Lucas: I know it’s like, pretty last minute and stuff. And there probably isn’t a lot to say about me, so it’ll take some work to throw something compelling together. I should’ve asked sooner, or like, bothered someone else. So I totally get it if you don’t have time or have too much to do or just, you know, don’t want to --
Jack is far from opposed, though. In fact, he’s touched by the request, expression softening to a smile.
Jack: Lucas. [ waiting for him to quiet ] I’d be happy to write one for you. It’s no problem at all.
Lucas: … okay. Cool. Um, thanks.
Jack: You’re quite welcome.
Lucas: I’ll send over the links and stuff later. Today. Later today. So it’s not any later.
Jack: Whatever works for you.
Lucas: Okay… okay. Cool.
Any more bashful vulnerability and Lucas just might implode. He mutters one more quick thanks and scampers away, Jack holding back his amusement long enough to spare Lucas further embarrassment. He chuckles to himself as he shifts back to his work, shaking his head.
INT. ERIC’S APARTMENT - ISADORA’S BEDROOM - DAY
Surrounded by various textbooks and scripts and with her laptop propped in front of her, Isadora sits on her bed. A half-finished essay about how the horror genre has developed over the years is open on her screen, but has been entirely abandoned in favor of the mysterious letter Valerie had in her belongings. Isadora holds several handwritten pages, eyebrows furrowed as she reads her mother’s words. She moves the first page to the side, and we catch a glimpse of Val’s loopy handwriting:
Dearest Zachary,
How lovely it is to hear from an old friend! I’m so glad that you’re doing well. Send my well wishes to that darling wife of yours.
To answer your question, I wasn’t entirely sure of who Isadora’s father was when I discovered I was pregnant -- as you well know, I often got rather drunk back then, so couldn’t be entirely sure of all my actions. However, upon reflection, I have come to the same conclusion as you.
Well, damn. Heavy stuff, even if somewhat rose-tinted through Valerie’s flowery language. Isadora bites her lip as she continues reading, clearly conflicted about this sudden revelation.
Eric, off-screen: Dinner’s ready!
Isadora doesn’t seem to hear Eric’s yell, so after a moment, Eric comes to her room to tell her directly. She still doesn’t look up from the letter, peaking Eric’s interest.
Eric: What are you reading?
Isadora: Hm? Oh, nothing.
She folds up the papers and shoves them under one of her notebooks nearby, giving Eric a small forced smile. He narrows his eyes at her, jokingly suspicious, which Isadora laughs off. She hops off her bed and asks what’s for dinner, successfully distracting him.
INT. THERAPIST’S OFFICE - DAY
Farkle is meeting with DR. MICHELLE HAN, assembled in their usual positions with her in her arm chair and him sprawled across the couch. He’s relaying the drama of the week and his unfortunate instrumental role in all the destruction, though at least this time it was far from intentional. But it’s clear he feels guilty about it, and he admits that his uncanny knack for making things worse is definitely not helping him combat those low moods that seem to creep up on him out of nowhere.
Dr. Han perks up at this, taking the opportunity to gear the conversation. She gently asks if they could discuss that further for a bit, his experience with the high and low moods. Everybody has off days, of course, but based on their previous discussions, she’s interested to hear more about how Farkle describes these different emotional states and the other factors that come with it.
It’s not hard to get Farkle to talk. He obliges without hesitation, launching into details about how it feels when he’s feeling especially frenzied -- sort of the opposite of what he’s dancing around now, but such a vivid experience when he’s in it that he remembers the sensation and always can vibe when it’s coming on. Dr. Han listens carefully, flipping to a clean page in her notepad to jot down his thoughts.
Farkle doesn’t think anything of it, but it seems like Dr. Han might be onto something more than just the typical one-on-one chat. A pronounced clapping counts us in...
INT. HAVERFORD PREP - AUDITORIUM - DAY
BRANDON RIVAS is clapping along to the downbeat while the Havies run through their showdown routine, the instrumental from How to Succeed playing on the speakers. He’s keeping a watchful eye on his classmates while they run through the choreography, shouting out when someone is off a beat or not sharp enough on the steps.
Charlie is definitely one of those people. He’s a couple of steps behind today, mind elsewhere, and when he accidentally bumps into BILLY ROSS he receives a glare in response. What’s the matter with you, man?
Brandon: Come on, Gardner! This is your choreography!
Fair point, Brandon. Charlie tries to get back on track, but lucky for him he’s far from the only one struggling this week. DWEEZIL HOWARD is out of step too, and his mistakes reverberate way more as he accidentally sends half the boys into a wave of near stumbles. Brandon yells for everyone to stop, shaking his head as Evan jogs to pause the music.
Brandon: This is not the time to get soft, guys. Showdown is right around the corner.
Havie: So what? It’s not like Adams is any competition. Six years of success speak for themselves.
Brandon: And complacency is the first step in breaking that streak. You want to be credited when that takes us down? [ off his head shake ] So, what’s going on? Is there some contagious case of vertigo going around that makes you all unable to balance on your own two feet?
Charlie chews his lip, shying away from the disappointment. He’s not the only recipient, but he knows he doesn’t have a good excuse -- and certainly not one Brandon would want to hear. But Dweezil answers first anyway, much more visibly frazzled than him.
Dweezil: I’m sorry, Brandon. I’m just really stressing about the MIT app.
Others murmur agreement, mentioning their own upcoming dream school deadlines and the pressure of finishing their applications. Charlie nods along as if that’s his problem too.
Brandon considers this for a long moment, scanning over his peers. He may have high expectations, but he’s not without compassion for his boys. He relents and expresses sympathy for everybody’s stress, claiming they can call it quits early today and cut down on afternoon rehearsals for the next few days while everyone is wrapping up applications.
The boys breathe a collective sigh of relief, thanking Brandon and starting to disperse. Brandon shouts after them to send those apps in fast and get ready to come back to work harder than ever -- they’re not going to slip and fall to AAA on his watch. Billy exchanges a handshake with him and suggests he take some time off to focus on himself, too, but Brandon shrugs this off.
Brandon: No, it’s fine. Think I’ll be able to make use of the time… might have to make some adjustments to the numbers anyway. [ quirking an eyebrow ] Make sure we’re the best we can possibly be.
For what it’s worth, the statement seems less than innocuous. It kind of feels like Brandon knows something we don’t, and based on Billy’s smug reaction, he’s in on it too. They exchange another fist bump before Billy heads out.
Charlie is one of the last to leave, pausing in packing up to check his phone. He’s got a surprising amount of texts on his lock screen, all from Daisy. He opens the thread, finding just under a dozen texts of her sharing live updates with him of an argument that apparently broke out between Rosie and Eleanor. Although her observations are characteristically dry and analytical -- a technical play-by-play rather than biased record -- the fact that she’s telling Charlie about it at all is a sign that she’s concerned about it. The final message she sent kind of sums up the looming stakes without saying so:
“Didn’t this happen with Bridgette?”
Either way, not good news. Charlie frowns. Before he figures out how to respond, Brandon startles him.
Brandon: All good, Charles?
Charlie: Uh, yeah. Yeah, just, you know. Lots on my mind. It was cool of you to give everyone a break right now.
Brandon: Well. [ with a shrug ] Nothing too serious going on with you, I hope. We need your talent to up our dance credentials -- I assume you realize by now how valuable you are to the team.
Charlie: Oh, well…
Brandon: Can’t afford to let anything distract us right now if we’re to come out victorious against Adams. [ a beat ] Least of all Adams itself… you know, it’s okay if you’re feeling conflicted…
Conflicted might be a bit strong -- although Charlie lives basically every day of his life conflicted -- but the notion that Brandon is even close to sensing what’s actually going on in his head sets him on edge. He clears his throat, frantically attempting to throw him off the trail.
Charlie: Oh, no. No. It’s um -- just family stuff. Stuff with my sisters.
Brandon: Ah… sibling nonsense. I get that. I’ve got two older brothers, and even though they’re not at home anymore it’s like I’m still carrying their baggage around.
Charlie: Big shoes to fill?
Brandon: Well, one was valedictorian and is starting his first year at Harvard Law, and the other is starting his third year in prison. So kind of high bars in either direction.
Well. No idea how to respond to that little fun fact. Brandon spares Charlie the awkwardness and lets him go, wishing him a good afternoon.
But pleasant as he is, it’s evident he doesn’t fully buy Charlie’s excuse.
INT. CHUBBIES - DAY
Isadora is at the counter at Chubbies, discussing all of the impending stressors with Lucas during his shift. They’re especially mindful of how Lucas’s scholarship plan is now basically hinging solely on a victory at showdown, which is feeling more and more like a long shot. With Zay no longer able to bolster their performance, they’re short star power.
Isadora: And since Haverford has Charlie, who is basically his counterweight, suddenly the scales are tipped heavily in their favor. We’ll be lucky if we can create some Frankenstein performance around the gaping hole Zay leaves behind.
Lucas: Have you thought about stepping up in his place? Not that you’re anywhere near the level of dancer that he is, but you do purportedly have star power.
Isadora: Gee, thanks. I’m honestly shocked you’re suggesting this.
Lucas: Believe me, it hurts. But I’ve got stakes riding on this too, and I know you’re talented. Maybe you could help prop things back up so we’ve got at least a shot of winning.
Isadora: I don’t know… I mean, I know I performed the other week, but it was all about that assignment, you know? It was specifically because it was out of my comfort zone. [ a beat ] Though, why, I don’t even really know anymore…
She feels more confused about performing these days than averse, with all the grieving she’s done over Valerie, but confusion still feels dangerous. Probably safer to just stay on the sidelines… probably...
Speaking of dangerous tasks, Isadora shifts to college applications. She submitted her NYU film school application ages ago, and she’s got a couple of other things in the pipeline, but she’s much more interested in how Lucas is dealing with his. When he feeds her the same lines he’s been telling everyone else, she raises her eyebrows. Not buying it.
Leave it to Isadora to see right through him. Lucas sighs, relenting and explaining that the essays are killing him. It’s like, everything else he can scrape together, fake, pull off like he’s scraped through everything else in his life. But the personal statements…
Lucas: I hate writing about myself. Why should all of my potential rest on how well I can sell myself in some 500-word anecdote? As if that paints the complete picture. Not that I want that either -- the full picture isn’t pretty. How am I supposed to convince some strangers to take a chance on me when I don’t even believe it? If I had the choice whether or not to know myself, I wouldn’t.
Isadora: Wonder what that says about those of us who do choose to know you.
Lucas: And what am I going to say? Howdy, I’m a son of a bitch, please let me into your school and give me your money to do so? Great fucking deal.
Isadora rolls her eyes. She points out that although he doesn’t want to hear it, when it comes to finances he knows she can help. Once the money from her inheritance fully comes through, she’ll have plenty that she doesn’t know what to do with. If she’s going to use it to help others -- especially those she cares about -- then helping him pursue his dreams is a non-issue. But, predictably, Lucas recoils at the suggestion.
Isadora: I swear, you are impossible. And you have such a weird hang-up about money.
Lucas: Yeah, views that you shared until about a month ago.
Isadora: Well, I’ve grown. I can see the nuances in money now and how it goes around. And I’m just saying that if you’ve got all these complexes around who has it and who can give it to you when you’re stuck on the bottom rung, then --
No doubt it’s a complicated series of complexes. As Isadora is settling into her rant, MISSY BRADFORD enters the diner. Lucas glances over Isadora’s shoulder and spots her, immediately clamming up.
Isadora: ...it’s what Reagan sold as trickle-down economics, but the thing is if you don’t give any money to the lowest income households from the get-go, then they never --
Lucas: Yeah, yeah, okay. I’ve got to go to the back.
Lucas retreats from the counter without waiting for permission, causing Isadora to scoff. She wasn’t finished! But he’s already gone, leaving her high and dry. But he also successfully avoided Missy, who steps up the counter for a pick-up order and is helped by another employee instead. She doesn’t acknowledge Isadora, who eyes her judgmentally from her stool.
As Missy collects her order and leaves -- glancing over her shoulder one last time for her usual Chubbies worker -- Dylan and Asher enter with Farkle. They join Isadora at the counter, asking where Lucas is. She shrugs, claiming he disappeared to deal with something.
Farkle: You ready to go? Is Maya here yet?
Isadora: Not yet. Figure she’ll be a bit late after the “atomic bomb” Jack dropped on her and Lucas -- her words, not mine.
Asher: What are you all up to?
Isadora: Since Farkle and I were technically responsible for the destruction in the auditorium --
Farkle: One could make the argument that I should have died last year.
Dylan: That would be a sick personal essay.
Isadora: We thought it was only fair that we put in the time to help Maya craft whatever last-minute fundraising effort we’re going to pull together to cover it.
As for Dylan and Asher, they were just stopping by to catch up with Lucas before going to practice their assignment for the week. Isadora commends Asher for performing again, considering it was so out of his comfort zone.
Farkle: Yeah, that’s not -- you’re not thinking of making that a habit, are you? Not asking for any reason, just curious. Not because you’re also a tenor. I’m just wondering.
Isadora: Smooth.
Asher: No, not planning to change career paths. Rest easy, Farkle. Just getting this out of the way sooner rather than later. [ nodding to Dylan ] It’s not as bad since we’re doing it together. And besides, can’t ignore the pull of the funk.
Dylan, wisely: Disco is for the gays.
Asher: Gotta pay our dues and get down with the boogie.
Far out, fellas! Isadora and Farkle wish them luck and head out together. Isadora asks Farkle how his therapy appointment went, and while his answer is unbothered, he definitely seems to be a little spacy this week. Isadora notices and considers asking him about it, but opts not to press further. They’ve got enough going on right now.
INT. GARDNER HOME - ROSIE’S BEDROOM - NIGHT
ROSIE GARDNER is huddled up in her bedroom, begrudgingly working on homework. She’s got Niall Horan playing, and the volume is turned up loud. It takes multiple knocks on her door before Rosie hears, shouting over the noise.
Rosie: Go away! I’m busy.
Charlie, from the hall: It’s me. Can we talk for a minute?
Rosie sighs, but gets up. She opens the door and spins back around to drop back into her seat at her desk, not bothering to greet him. But she let him in, which is more than anyone else has managed this evening.
Charlie blinks as the pop music assaults his ears. He gently closes the door behind him, raising his voice over Niall.
Charlie: Think you could turn Niall down for a second?
Rosie: Huh?
Charlie: Turn your boyfriend down so we can actually hear each other!
Rosie: Ugh. You’re so not funny.
And yet, she relents and lowers the volume. Charlie makes a show of shaking off the ringing in his ears, knocking his ear slightly.
Charlie: Just checking for significant damage. Need industrial strength noise-cancelling headphones to come in here. Like they wear when they guide airplanes onto the runway.
Rosie: You are so annoying. Did you want something, or?
Charlie explains that Daisy texted him that afternoon about a fight she apparently had with mom. She seemed pretty concerned, so he just wanted to check in. Is everything okay? Rosie rolls her eyes.
Rosie: It’s so whatever. Daisy is exaggerating.
Charlie: I don’t think Daisy is capable of exaggeration. We took all the drama genes, there wasn’t any left for her.
Rosie: Well, she is. Yeah, mom and I argued, but it’s like… it’s dumb, whatever. I don’t even care.
Charlie: You’re listening to your sad 1D playlist.
Rosie: I said I don’t care, Charlie. And I can listen to whatever I want whenever I want.
Charlie: Okay, well, can you at least tell me what it was about? Or what’s --
Rosie: Ugh. It was nothing! Can you mind your own business and leave me alone? I’m trying to work.
Yikes. Rosie has always had a little bit of early teen venom in her, but this feels like more than that. Charlie doesn’t want to just let it drop, but it’s more than obvious she will not be having any productive conversations right now.
Charlie: Okay. I’m only -- if you want to talk about anything, you know you can tell me. I’m here to listen. [ a beat ] Okay?
Rosie: [ not bothering to look at him ] Okay. Whatever. Thanks.
She turns Niall back up, effectively ending the talk. Charlie hangs around for a moment longer, words he wants to say on the tip of his tongue, but for now there’s nothing to be done. He reluctantly retreats, the ghost of the past looming over him.
INT. MINKUS HOME - FARKLE’S BEDROOM - NIGHT
Farkle, Maya and Isadora are spread out around Farkle’s bedroom as they brainstorm ideas for fundraising. Maya paces around, occasionally picking up little trinkets and inspecting them before putting them back down in the wrong place. Isadora, meanwhile, is laying down on Farkle’s bed on her back, her head hanging upside down off the side. Farkle has gathered a blanket around him as he sits at the other end of the bed.
Maya: You need to add some meat to that stick of a body, Farkle. You can’t keep living like an orphan who’s freezing to death on the streets of Victorian London.
Farkle: It���s not my fault I have a fast metabolism. You’re just jealous.
Maya: Yes, I’m very jealous of the boy who looks like he’s dying of scurvy.
Isadora snorts in amusement, for which Farkle shoots a glare at her.
Maya: Go get us some snacks, orphan boy. We’ll fatten you up Hansel and Gretel style.
Farkle: This is offensive to orphans everywhere, I hope you know.
Isadora: As the only orphan here, I’m not offended. Maya, you may continue your bullying.
Maya grins, but Isadora frowns as she realizes what she said. Technically, she isn’t an orphan, if her father is out there alive... despite rolling his eyes, Farkle does get up to get snacks, blanket still tightly wrapped around him.
Once she and Maya are alone, Isadora sits up straight and turns towards her, lips pursed in thought as she considers what she wants to say.
Isadora: Do you know who your dad is?
Maya stops wandering around and looks at Isadora in surprise.
Maya: Where’d that come from?
Isadora: I don’t know. Just wondering about the orphan thing, I guess.
Maya: Izzy, that was just a joke. And directed towards Farkle. All jeers are reserved for our darling beanpole -- I’m not stupid enough to drag you.
Isadora: Appreciated. [ a beat ] I know nothing about my dad.
Maya: [ with a shrug ] I know my dad’s name and some basic facts about him, like his job, but nothing else.
Isadora: Have you ever considered getting in touch with him? What if he’s out there somewhere? Mine or yours.
Maya: When I was younger I thought about it… but he abandoned me, so what’s the point? If he wanted me in his life, I would be. He knows who I am and how to contact me, but he hasn’t. Why waste my precious time and energy dealing with him when I already have my mom? She’s all I need.
Isadora nods, considering this. Her father situation is quite different to Maya’s, so not all that helpful. Regardless, it’s something to think about. Maya is pensive, too, mind now occupied by thoughts of Katy. Isadora notices her shift in mood.
Isadora: You miss her?
Maya: [ with a theatrical sigh ] Always. [ then, a bittersweet smile ] It’s okay, every artist has to have their tragic backstory. It’s good. Gives me personal agony to work through.
Isadora: … well, actually --
Before she can say anything further, Farkle returns with an armful of snacks. He tosses them at Maya and Isadora.
Farkle: Here you go, little piggies. Oink oink.
Maya: You can’t say that to us, we’re women.
Isadora: We could have you cancelled for that.
Maya: Besides, as the only poor one present, I reserve all rights to the word pig. [ eyeing them ] Capitalist swine…
Farkle: Yeah, speaking of lack of funding...
The conversation moves on, back to fundraising, but Maya gets out her phone to send Katy a quick message letting her know that she misses her.
INT. AAA - ATRIUM - DAY
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Boogie Shoes” as performed by Glee Cast || Performed by Asher Garcia & Dylan Orlando
Kicking off the first official performance for the ‘70s theme, Asher launches us into number with an impressive opening note. He starts at the top of the stairs in the atrium, starting down the steps while singing towards Dylan, who’s waiting down below. When he sings “boy, to be with you is my favorite thing,” Dylan playfully points to himself and beams. They’re both dressed in modern-day approximations of disco garb -- colorful dress shirts, glossy vests with matching flare pants, funky patterned ascots.
And they’re setting the standard for what performances will be like without the usual stage of the auditorium. Their chosen location is the atrium, mostly empty as it’s during class hours, the rest of the A class scattered around the space to watch and provide back-up vocals (as well as their usual reactions and applause). Zay is particularly torn, clearly flipping between jealousy that he can’t be dancing and basically vibrating with the infectious groove.
In the case of Dylan and Asher, there is plenty to cheer for. They’re simply undeniably a joy to watch, especially with each other, and Dylan was right when he said disco is for the gays. They’ve got the night fever, full of energy and charm as they dance together. On the “woo!” during the bridge, Dylan lifts Asher in a funky little hop moment. And Asher’s vocal runs throughout are nothing to scoff at either.
It’s a smashing way to start the assignments off right!
INT. AAA - PRACTICE ROOM - DAY
As strong a showing as that little number was, the upbeat mood doesn’t last long. Stress dominates in the meeting between Maya, Yindra, Farkle, Jeff, and Isadora, who are deliberating on the current status of their showdown setlist. They’re attempting to analyze it and rework with the knowledge that Zay will not be able to participate, but it’s easier said than done.
Lack of focus doesn’t help matters. Farkle is noticeably zoned out, lost in his own head, and Maya has to snap at him to get him back at attention. This is not amateur hour! No time for spacing out, Farkle! He apologizes, but Isadora notices he still seems far away somehow.
The fervent discussion is immediately halted when Zay enters the studio, realizing they’ve all convened to work without him. He asks what gives.
Maya: It’s not personal, Zayby. But considering your current situation...
Zay: I’m still choreographer. Even if I’m not performing, I should be included in meetings. Especially if you’re talking about altering the routine.
Jeff: We’re not.
Farkle: At least, not right now.
Isadora, diplomatically: We just know that not being able to participate is difficult for you, so Riley suggested… we figured it would be better not to like… force you to deal with it. Or rub it in your face.
Maya: Exactly. See? We’re doing this for you.
How sweet. But Zay isn’t moved. He grows defensive, nodding along but dripping with sarcasm.
Zay: Great. Thanks. Well I guess if you need to drag me out of the recycling bin to comment on choreography, you all know how to reach me.
He storms out -- a bit unevenly on his boot -- leaving them awkwardly in his absence. Farkle clears his throat. The only who doesn’t seem uncomfortable is Maya, who shifts gears back to the matter at hand effortlessly. It’s just business, after all.
Maya: So star power --
INT. THRIFT SHOP - DAY
Riley is searching the racks for an outfit for the ‘70s dance, Charlie in tow. Every now and then, she’ll find a vintage shirt that’s his size and hold it up against his chest just on instinct, always on the lookout for her friends even if they’re not looking themselves.
Riley: It’s amazing how every color looks good on you. You should really consider branching out beyond neutrals and inoffensive shades of blue.
Tell us something we don’t know, Riles. Charlie brushes off her compliments, keeping his focus on the topic at hand while they shop. He’s seeking advice on how to handle arguing family members, since unfortunately, Riley has plenty of relevant experience with that. He’s had it in his family before with Bridgette, but he can’t remember much of it and honestly, one of the keys to their family dynamic is how most unpleasant things occur behind closed doors. Most of the time, they don’t even know when something is wrong with each other.
Riley: Do you have any more details? I feel like context would help.
Charlie: Nope. I only heard about it through Daisy, and when I tried to talk to Rosie, she wouldn’t budge.
Riley contemplates and admits she’s hesitant to try and give advice when the context is so vague and wide open, but ultimately the most important thing she thinks he could do is to continue being there for Rosie. He told her he was, and that’s the best he can do under the circumstances. If he actually witnesses another argument for himself, then that’s a different story.
Riley: But no matter what happens, try not to let yourself get caught in the middle of it. I mean, you should help where you can, but there’s nothing worse than trying to fix problems that aren’t yours and you can’t control. It’s between them, not you, and trying to mend it from the outside is only going to result in failure and frustration. You have to look out for your own well-being first. I wish someone had told me that before my parents fell apart.
Very important advice. Charlie thanks her and expresses sympathy for her messy parental situation again, but she shrugs it off and moves past it. Instead she finds another cute ‘70s material button down in classic sky blue, enthusiastically lifting it up to measure against Charlie.
Riley: Pair a blazer with this, and you’d be all set to boogie. Makes your eyes pop too… ugh, you’re so pretty it’s disgusting.
Charlie: I thought we were shopping for you, not me. I’m not the one who gets to disco.
Riley: Well, that’s not necessarily true. The fundraiser is open to everyone -- that’s the only way we’re going to make any profit, after all. And you know you’d be more than welcome.
Charlie: Yeah, maybe… with showdown so close and everything…
Riley: Charlie. [ holding his gaze ] You’re family. Forget showdown, forget east and west side. As long as I’m around, you fit. And I know for sure I’m not the only one who feels that way. Got it? Can you dig it?
Charlie, grateful: I can dig it.
Riley: Righteous. I’m serious though, what you should dig is this shirt.
As Riley shifts back to searching for her own look, they jump to chatting about college applications. Charlie asks how hers are going after she explains Lucas’s poorly concealed stress about them, and she claims they’re going fine.
Riley: I’m a pretty textbook candidate, all things considered, and my poor tragic backstory of being bullied out of school and divorced parents sure makes for great personal essay fodder.
Charlie: Kind of weird how they teach us to exploit our own trauma…
Riley: I’m definitely applying to Barnard, and I’ve decided I’m going to throw my hat in the ring for Tisch even though it’s basically the longest shot there is. Add in a handful of second choice picks and you get the idea. But honestly, I’m not all that pressed about it right now. I feel like it’s going to be way harder when acceptances and rejections come through and it’s all… real. I can throw any application out there I want and I don’t have to do anything about it. When I actually know what my options are… then it’ll be real. You know? When I actually have to decide what path I want to take. Because right now, I feel like I have no idea what I want that to be.
Charlie nods, agreeing wholeheartedly. He definitely knows the feeling of not having any idea what he wants the future to be… as the low hum of an unfamiliar instrument floats in…
INT. AAA - BLACK BOX THEATER - DAY
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Amazing Grace” as performed by The Military Band of the Royal Scots Dragoon Guards || Performed by Dave Williams
In what is probably the weirdest performance AMBITION has seen to date, Dave stands alone in front of the classroom and goes to town on the bagpipes. Yes, apparently, Dave Williams can play the bagpipes (though whether he plays them well is a whole other story). And he gives it his all on this immensely famous tune, bewildering his peers and rendering them speechless.
That being said, while they can’t find any words, that doesn’t stop the A class from reacting. The expressions range from confused to stunned to struggling to keep it together. Maya stares in disbelief and then scrunches her face, looking around to see if anyone else is seeing this. Zay and Nigel are on the verge of tears from stifling their laughter; Yogi is misty-eyed from sheer emotion at his best friend’s… powerful performance. Nate mouths trying to sing along to the screechy tones with an absolutely delighted grin, while Dylan emulates the patriotic vibe by standing and giving a salute. Asher shakes his head from next to him, also hiding laughter behind his hand.
When Dave finally concludes, releasing a big exhale, the room is filled with silence for a long moment. Yogi starts the applause that the others uncertainly mimic, until Isadora finally, bluntly breaks the silence.
Isadora: Okay, I’m just going to say it -- what the hell, Dave?
Dave: What? Is something wrong?
Sarah: Where the hell did this come from? Are you seriously damaged?
Yindra: Forget that. I’m dying to know when you learned to play the bagpipes. And why have you deprived us of it for so long?
Farkle: The assignment is ‘70s music. How did you end up on “Amazing Grace?”
Dave, baffled: I don’t get what the big deal is. I found the song on a ‘70s playlist on Spotify, I can show you. And I looked it up -- the fig Newton dude wrote the song in 1779.
Clarissa: Fig newton --
Zay: [ at his wits end trying not to laugh ] I can’t. I can’t --
Dave: 1779! So it’s from the ‘70s.
All, in unison: 1970s, Dave!
Dave: … WHAT?!
The class descends into hysterics. Harper attempts to thank Dave for an… interesting performance, if nothing else.
Harley: I found it quite spirited. Very much enjoyed.
Dave huffs, marching back to his desk. He drops his bagpipes on the desktop --
EXT. AAA - REAR PARKING LOT - DAY
Which becomes a soapy sponge landing with a splat on the hood of a car, Haley working to scrub it clean. A few more quick shots help establish the setting -- Jeff and Darby untangling hoses; Riley and Chai filling up buckets of water; Asher ringing out a washcloth as far away from his body as he can stretch it, mildly disgusted.
Yes, Maya’s new fundraising scheme is in full swing -- a car wash! Cars are lining up for the A class to give a shining clean-up. Considering they threw the concept together in just a couple of days, it’s really not a shabby showing. Maya is praising her own quick thinking by the pay table, where they’re also selling baked goods. Zay is manning the cash box, since he can’t do much else.
Maya: I swear, sometimes my own mind amazes me. Never lets me down. And you can’t go wrong with a good old-fashioned classic.
Zay: Yeah, except car washes are usually in the summer. Not the dregs of autumn when we’re all going to get hypothermia.
Maya: It’s actually unseasonably warm today. And that’s the brilliance of it. Who else is doing a car wash in this weather economy? No competition, big bucks.
At least the weather is nice. With them out in their cotton shorts and tees to do all this work, Zay’s right to have reservations. But the sun is out, and the income has been steady thus far. Nate finishes off drying a car with Dylan, who has his hair pushed back with a tie-dye bandana.
Nate: You know, we should all just wet our shirts. That will get the girls and gays to come running.
Maya: [ into her bullhorn ] Don’t accelerate the hypothermia, Martinez. Keep it classy.
Nate: You’re turning down a million-dollar idea!
Maya waves him off, gesturing that he get back to work. And they all put it together real fast when another customer pulls up at the end of the line, EVELYN RAND emerging from her nice SUV and coming over to greet them. She commends them for their efficient set up.
Maya: That’s all thanks to me, Maya Penelope Hart. Vice President and overall go-getter. I’m the one that makes things happen.
Evelyn: And modest as they come, too.
Evelyn happily accepts Maya’s handshake, but she tosses a wink to Zay and Clarissa working the bake sale table. She claims she’s eager to help the cause, and she’s sure they’ll do an excellent job with her car. While she waits, she’s hoping to have a brief chat with Jack, so can she just leave her keys with them? She trusts them to move her vehicle twenty feet when it’s her turn.
Maya: Of course. We here in the A class pride ourselves on our care and attention. Your vehicle is safe with us.
Zay snorts, turning it into a cough. Evelyn hands over her keys pleasantly, waving to the rest of the kids working as she heads into the building. Maya spins the key ring on her finger for a moment, contemplating.
Maya: Can’t afford to screw this up. Gonna need someone extremely anal and annoyingly cautious to handle this one. [ into the bullhorn ] Garcia! Get your persnickety nonexistent ass over here!
Nigel arrives at that moment with a takeout bag in his hands. He tries to weave through the cars and avoid drill sergeant Maya as he heads towards the back entrance to the school, but unfortunately he’s not slick enough.
Maya: Chey! What do you think you’re doing? Cars are over here.
Nigel: Oh. Yes. Well, Jade’s holed up in the costume loft with all the projects she’s finishing…
Maya, unmoved: Uh huh.
Nigel: And I know she isn’t great about eating when she’s under this much stress, so I brought her some food to eat while she works. And I thought I’d go… give it to her… [ quickly ] okay, check you later.
He turns and speeds towards the entrance, making his swift escape. Riley saunters over to join them at the cash table, tilting her head fondly.
Riley: That’s so sweet.
Maya: Meh. A convenient excuse.
Zay: And how are you one to talk, Maya? You realize standing around shouting orders at everyone isn’t work.
Riley: Come on, Madam Vice President. Time to put in a little elbow grease.
Zay raises his eyebrows, accenting Riley’s challenge. Pride in jeopardy, Maya sniffs and relinquishes her bullhorn, placing it on the table. She spins and flips her ponytail over her shoulder, marching over to contribute to the cause. Riley and Zay exchange amused looks, while the boombox blasting the iconic opening hand claps takes over the soundscape...
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Car Wash” as performed by Rose Royce || Performed by Maya Hart (feat. AAA Seniors)
You all knew it was coming. The moment we started scrubbing those fenders, you should’ve seen it coming. Maya leads the A class in a funky rendition of the disco classic, swaying her hips and swinging her ponytail as they put in the hard work (though, somehow, Maya still manages to avoid most of the heavy lifting). She handles most of the verses, though Yindra also takes some of the spotlight with vocal runs. Nate perfects his slutdrop as he cleans tires.
In the midst of the grooving, the business is bumping. Interspersed amongst the performing we see Clarissa and Dylan charming patrons at the bake sale table, money changing hands, and Zay dutifully keeping track of everything as he mans the pay station.
On the last chorus, Maya has made her way onto a roof of one of the cars, Yindra, Haley, and Darby emulating her on the other cars they’re working on. The A class does some rad synced choreography to take the number home, Maya sliding down the front windshield and kicking up her leg before Farkle makes the finishing swipe of a washcloth across the hood.
Car wash! Zay deposits another payment into the cashbox, snapping it closed with a flourish.
Evelyn’s car is now closer to the front of the pack, and more business is still coming. Charlie makes his way over from the parking lot, waving to Riley as he makes his way over to the tables. Clarissa and Dylan greet him cheerfully, Riley and Maya jogging over from the line of cars. Zay doesn’t say anything, but offers a hesitant smile, which is better than nothing. Charlie mirrors it.
Clarissa comes out from behind the table to give him a hug, but warns him not to let Haley see him -- she’s soaked and will probably get him all damp. Charlie claims he didn’t plan to stay long, he just wanted to come by and see how things were going, as well drop off some baked goods they could sell that he and his sisters made. Dylan takes them happily. Maya asks where his car is and what kind of wash he wants, which Charlie awkwardly laughs off.
Charlie: I wouldn’t make you guys do that. But I can make a contribution --
Maya: Please, what do you think this is, a pity party? We don’t accept charity.
Zay: Yes we do.
Clarissa: We’ll take all the charity you’ve got.
Maya: This is a business, and we provide a service. So put your boring little sedan in line and turn your patronization into profit.
Riley: Maya, if he doesn’t want --
Charlie: You know what? Okay. [ raising his hands in surrender ] I’ll take whatever the easiest job is. Meet in the middle.
Fair enough. Maya relents, going back to shouting orders at others. Zay shows Charlie what their pricing options are, and though Charlie is going for the cheapest one, he overpays anyway.
Charlie: What Maya doesn’t know won’t hurt her.
Zay: Yeah, and it’ll probably save us.
They exchange something close to a conspiratorial wink. Riley senses that they’re actually communicating without imminent disaster, so she comes over to join them. Charlie asks how business is going -- it seems to be moving pretty swiftly. Riley is optimistic, claiming that between this and the dance -- which is garnering a lot of buzz on social media -- they may just cover their expenses yet. At mention of the dance, Riley makes a quip about how Charlie should’ve bought that shirt at the thrift shop to wear, which catches Zay’s attention.
Zay: You’re coming?
Charlie: Oh, no. No, I wasn’t, um… I hadn’t really thought about it.
Zay: Oh.
Charlie, shyly: … would it be okay if I did?
Zay meets his eyes, uncharacteristically timid. He doesn’t know what to say, because he honestly doesn’t know how he feels about the possibility. Things aren’t as tense as they were before, and they’ve managed to break some of the ice that’s frozen them in place, but it’s far from thawed. He doesn’t know if he wants it to be or not. It’s all confusing, and being put on the spot proves just how much.
He’s spared from answering when Isadora pipes up from the curb.
Isadora: Oh, fuck no.
Charlie jumps, turning to search for the problem. Zay leans around him to look too. The issue is not hard to identify.
The Haverford boys. A whole bunch of them, rolling up in their classy cars, totally filling up the back end of the car wash line. Billy honks obnoxiously in his, waving to the washers working further down the row.
Brandon hops out of his car, the rest of the boys following suit. He leads the saunter over to the tables, where Maya, Farkle, and Isadora rush to head them off. Charlie stares as they approach, obviously mortified that they’re here; Zay frowns, glancing at him suspiciously.
Maya: What the hell do you think you’re doing? You’re blocking the line.
Dweezil: Blocking? Is that any way to speak to a customer?
Isadora: One we’re about to kick the hell out, yeah.
The congregation bristles, but Brandon holds up his hands -- both out of innocence and to signal his crew to halt. He remains smooth and unbothered as ever, calmly stating that they’re simply here to support the cause.
Brandon: It’s the least we could do, showing up for the less fortunate. We want showdown to be a fair fight, don’t we?
Maya: Oh, if that’s what you’re looking for, we can give you a fight.
[ Brandon raises his eyebrows, clearly amused by Maya’s sharp spunk. ]
Farkle: How did you all even hear about this?
Brandon: Why, I would think that’s obvious. Charles told us.
[ Many eyes throw to Charlie at once. He swallows, dipping his head. ]
Brandon: Well, technically, he told Evan, but I don’t see why he didn’t just share it with the boys. Evan was more than happy to pass the message along, though, and we all thought it was just a swell idea. Quaint, really.
Billy: Yeah, where’s the lemonade stand? You should jump on that hot market next.
But belittlement aside, they really are here to get their cars washed. That’s all. The A class can take it or leave it, but if they choose to turn away willing customers then that’s their prerogative.
Well… business is business. Maya forces a smile, keeping her diva daggers locked on Brandon as she instructs Isadora and Farkle to go start filling the buckets. Brandon holds her glare, evenly matched with his cool, subtle smirk.
INT. AAA - JACK’S OFFICE - DAY
Jack is enjoying a catch-up with Angela over coffee, in generally good spirits all things considered. As he says, it’s nice to take a moment to forget all of the stress and just chat with a good friend. Angela is touched, placing her hand on her chest. She claims if her visit will be good for anything then, that’s a great reason.
The two of them get on the topic of her pregnancy, and how she’s feeling about impending motherhood. She confides that Shawn is way more nervous about it than she is, but ultimately she feels okay about it. Pregnancy isn’t the most fun experience in the world, but she has always thought that a family would be part of her future. Considering she’s not getting any younger, it feels like the right time.
She asks if Jack ever thought about having kids, and he grows a bit more somber. It’s not that he hasn’t thought about it… and to be honest, he figured if he did he’d beat Shawn to it, but clearly that wasn’t in his cards. And now here he is, coming off a failed serious relationship, already in his 40s…
Angela: It’s never too late, Jack. If it’s something you really want. I mean, hell, look at Eric! He skipped all the hard stuff, too.
Jack: I guess that is one way to look at Isadora’s tragic loss…
Angela: I’m just saying, never say never. You’re a great mentor, responsible and fair, and you care. You care a lot. If you chose to try, whether by yourself or with a partner, I think you’d be a great dad.
Maybe… it all just feels so out of the realm of possibility. Besides, he argues, he basically has 200 kids at any given time to take care of. It’s not the same, no, but he watches out for the Adams students as seriously as he would his own. And you know, sometimes…
Jack: Every once in a while, it kind of feels like they are.
It’s not hard to guess who he’s thinking about. Angela starts to question him further, thinking this is probably a meaningful discussion to have, but they’re interrupted by Evelyn knocking briskly on the door. She greets both of them cheerfully.
Evelyn: So nice to see you again, Angela! I do hope I’m not intruding on anything important -- I meant to come sooner, but I got caught up in a riveting chat with Mister Keiner.
Jack: No, of course not.
Angela: In fact, I was just getting ready to head out, so I will get out of your hair.
Jack: I just wasn’t expecting you.
Evelyn: No need to rush, Angela. [ to Jack ] I’m just here to participate in that splendid car wash you’ve got out back. They’ve got a great little operation going, I have to say. And that Maya Hart -- talk about a firecracker.
Jack: Trust us, we’re quite familiar with her spark.
Angela bids both of them goodbye, promising Jack she’ll see him later. Once they’re alone, Evelyn commends Jack on inspiring his students to find creative ways to fund their financial endeavors. Especially given how their original proposal for the scholarships was voted down at the school board. In her opinion, she was hoping they’d at least contribute a portion -- she thought it was a nifty idea.
Jack: Yes, they weren’t thrilled to hear the decision either.
Evelyn: It’s disappointing, although hardly surprising considering the way Jefferson campaigned behind closed doors. He’s got a fairly influential stake in the voting bloc, unfortunately.
Jack: What? What do you mean?
Evelyn: Oh, Jack, I thought you already knew. It was an extremely close vote on the board to provide funding, but Jefferson tipped the scales against it. He and Yancy basically talked it down for days with colleagues before the actual tally.
Um, no, Jack did not know about that, and it obviously pisses him off. He’s speechless, trying to process the blatant partisan maneuvers being played against them within the inner workings of the board. Especially from someone who is now working within the walls of AAA. He knew Yancy didn’t like him, but this…
EXT. AAA - REAR PARKING LOT - DAY
The Haverford boys are loitering while they wait for the A class to finish cleaning their cars, showing how completely unbothered they are to hang around and watch their competitors sweat. Charlie is also hovering to nervously keep an eye on things, staying with Clarissa at the baked goods table and nibbling on a sugar cookie.
From where he’s scrubbing Dweezil’s windshield dry, Nate glares at them derisively.
Nate: Rich pricks. I should smash this damn window…
Yogi: Easy, bulldog.
Dave: Just smile and wash, boys. Smile and wash.
Thankfully, they’re efficient, and it doesn’t take them long to grit their teeth through the work. Maya slaps her washcloth against Brandon’s hood, declaring it finished, then marches her way back over to where he’s slouched against a lamp pole near the pay table.
Maya: Alright, knock-off Warblers, your cars are done.
Evan: Warblers?
Dweezil: From Glee.
Billy: Ha! She thinks we watched Glee.
Bottom line is, their business here is done, so they can roll their asses out. Maya essentially shoos them, but Zay pipes up from the pay table.
Zay: Um, they can’t go yet. They’ve still got a tab to settle.
Maya: They didn’t pay upfront?
Billy: Well, couldn’t very well do that. Why would we pay you before we get any proof that you’re going to do a good job? It’s simply smart shopping.
Clarissa: Well, the job is done now. So you can pay up.
Brandon: Ooh… see, I think there might’ve been a misunderstanding here.
Charlie tenses, sensing impending doom. He steps out from behind the table in case he needs to mediate, just as Isadora and Farkle march back over with their buckets and rags to see what the hold up is. They’ve got other potential customers waiting.
Brandon: Another smart business practice is to agree on the terms and conditions before you make a deal. Now, we always knew our payment was going to be contingent on the quality of the work. Sure, Babineaux here laid out the pricing for us, but we didn’t get anything in writing. You didn’t get our John Hancocks signing off on it.
Zay: You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.
Charlie, nervously: Come on, guys --
Maya: So you mean to tell me that we just spent the better part of an hour scrubbing your ungrateful little shits until they shined, and blocking other well-intentioned customers from coming in the meantime, only for you to stiff us at checkout?
Dweezil: At least we made you look busy.
Billy: Yeah, consider it practice. We know you could use all of that you can get.
Brandon: [ with a shrug ] Should’ve gotten it in writing.
Isadora: Yeah? Well how about you fucking get this --
She and Farkle snap first, lifting their buckets and sloshing them directly at Brandon. It catches him off-guard, totally dousing him in sudsy water.
Charlie: Oh no.
Riley, from the curb: Oh no.
Billy: Oh, hell no!
Hit the queen bee, feel the sting of the workers! The Havies immediately fire back, grabbing whatever they can get their hands on -- hoses, abandoned buckets -- and lobbing it back at Isadora and Farkle.
And with that, it’s a full-on brawl. Water and soap flying in every direction, the other Havies and Adams seniors launching into the battle without hesitation. Maya shrieks as she’s soaked, shouting for her classmates to take the Havies out. Zay salvages the cash box and dives under the table, taking cover.
INT. AAA - JACK’S OFFICE - DAY
Jack is still searching for what to say in response to the bombshell information Evelyn dropped, but Harley leaps in the doorway and gets both their attention.
Harley: Major problem at the car wash. It’s completely devolved.
Jack exchanges a quick look with Evelyn, then jumps up from his chair.
EXT. AAA - REAR PARKING LOT - DAY
Jack and Harley emerge as the water fight is in full swing, and basically everyone is dripping in soap water. Jack takes control and marches into the fray, stepping into authoritarian mode and demanding that all of the nonsense cease. The Adams students drop their weapons immediately, not daring to get even a drop on their principal.
Though he doesn’t command the same respect with the Haverford boys, they don’t push it any further. They got what they came for, managing to derail the car wash and pull a fast one on the A class. They cackle with laughter as they sprint back to their cars, piling inside in record time and peeling out of the parking lot.
Brandon’s car is one of the last to leave, catching the eye of Maya, Zay, and Charlie through the passenger window. He smirks and tosses a wink in their direction, but it’s impossible to say who it was meant for. Maybe all of them.
None of them look especially pleased either way. Maya shoots a death glare at Charlie, even though he arguably got the worst of it, completely drenched from head to toe. If he was in on the whole thing, he looks pretty miserable about it.
Break 1.
INT. ERIC’S APARTMENT - ISADORA’S BEDROOM - DAY
Now in fresh, comfy clothes and bare faces, Riley, Isadora and Maya lounge around in Isa’s bedroom. Maya’s hair is up in a towel wrap, while Riley’s is down and in the process of drying, and Isadora’s is pulled back into a messy bun. Isadora is also wearing her glasses rather than usual contacts. With a stretch, Maya hops from the bed.
Maya: I never want to work like that ever again. I’m exhausted, in pain, and starving. Is this Hell?
Riley: You truly weren’t built for working class, were you?
Tell her about it! Maya disappears to raid Eric’s fridge, leaving Riley and Isadora free from her complaints. Isadora uses the opportunity to pick Riley’s brain.
Isadora: What do you think our chances are in the showdown? Full disclosure.
Riley: Full disclosure? Not great. [ with a sigh ] But we could still pull through. If we work hard enough, and come together to --
Isadora: I don’t need the full spiel, but thanks. I know how stressed Lucas and Maya are about it, and I’m considering -- considering is the key word here -- offering to perform. You know, if it would help.
Riley’s face lights up, but upon seeing Isadora’s level glare, tries to suppress her smile. She fails.
Isadora: Don’t look at me. Forget I said anything.
Riley: Aw, come on. I’m happy you’re thinking about it yourself instead of, like, being peer pressured by Maya or something.
Isadora: She’s very nearly at her breaking point, I can tell. Every day her will to just let me be is deteriorating bit by bit.
Riley: I think… not to get too Uncle Eric here, but I feel like because you keep thinking of performing as doing it in front of an audience, like being judged, it’s holding you back. You should just do it for the joy of it. Why were you drawn to performing in the first place?
Isadora, reluctantly: … because it was fun...
Riley: Exactly! Because it’s fun. You have to have fun with it.
In fact… Riley brightens with an idea, reaching for her phone and searching for a song.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Lady Marmalade” as performed by LaBelle || Performed by Riley Matthews, Maya Hart & Isadora De La Cruz
[ Lyrics specific to characters -- follow along here! ]
As the bass and keys begin, Riley stands up on Isadora’s bed, pulling her up with her. Riley sings the initial “hey sister, go sister” to Isadora, who stands awkwardly in the middle of the bed, not looking all that impressed.
In the first verse, Maya walks into the room with her haul from the kitchen. Her mouth opens when she sees Riley singing.
Maya: Are we doing this? Okay, we’re doing this.
She drops the snacks without a care, jumping onto the bed to join Riley -- just in time for the chorus. They move around Isadora as they belt out iconic vocals, trying to get her in the groove.
Maya takes on the second verse with Riley on the backing vocals. Although Isadora tries to remain stoic, she can’t help but begin to vibe with them. By the end of the next chorus, she’s singing along, too. In French, no less! But maybe let’s not look up the lyric translation…
In the instrumental break, the three girls get down from the bed and strut forwards towards the door. They pass through it one at a time, puffs of makeup and glitter blowing around them in slow-mo as they do.
INT. AAA - LECTURE HALL - DAY
This time, the temporary performance space is the lecture hall, which is an inspired choice since it actually has a pseudo-stage and lighting capabilities.
When they emerge onto the small stage, they’re in full glam. Hair glossy, makeup glowing, and outfits iconique. They each wear a skintight jumpsuit along with oversized faux fur coats. Riley’s getup is a white jumpsuit and yellow coat, Isadora’s is a blue jumpsuit and pink coat, and Maya’s is a pink jumpsuit and white coat. They strut to the front of the stage, spotlights on them.
Isadora takes charge of the next verse, confidently singing and dancing with her friends by her side. Riley and Maya come in towards the end, before all three complete the rest of the song together. It’s glamorous, it’s sultry, it’s powerful. Foxy, ladies!
We fade out of the performance to see the rest of the class and Harper as they applaud. Although the girls don’t look quite as glam out of the performance-dreamscape, they look just as badass. Lucas and Farkle in particular seem stunned by the performance.
INT. AAA - TECHNICIAN’S BOOTH - DAY
Zay hands over the cash box from the car wash to Lucas.
Zay: Despite the carnage, the most important thing survived.
And, in spite of the disastrous end, it seems like they made good for their work. They raked in a pretty penny for all the scrubbing and washing -- it’s far from all that they need, but it should make a sizable dent in the auditorium accident debt. And that’s not nothing.
Lucas thanks Zay for his help and for watching the money, getting up to put it in a safe place in the booth. He claims he can’t do it until Zay leaves, though, since there are certain things only he should know about the booth. Zay rolls his eyes but obliges, throwing in an offhand comment about how weird he is before slowly making his way out.
As he’s heading down the steps, he passes by Missy, who is casually making her way up into the booth. Like she goes up there all the time, like it’s no big deal. She even greets Zay as they pass, which he uncertainly returns. He frowns at her over his shoulder as she heads on up, obviously confused by her presence.
As confidently as she enters, Lucas evidently wasn’t expecting her either. He jumps when she addresses him, moving away from wherever he stashed the car wash cash. When he realizes it’s her, his posture grows even more defensive.
Lucas: What are you doing in here?
Missy: Only what anyone would deem visiting this musty space worthy for. I’m looking for you.
Lucas: I don’t know if you missed the memo, but people don’t waltz in here whenever they want. No matter how privileged they are.
Missy laughs, allowing him the dig. Following their increasingly common rapport, back-and-forth that straddles the line between friendly fire and hostility depending on your lens. She maintains innocence as she waits for him to settle back in his usual chair, claiming she only wanted to discuss the current A class financial crisis.
Missy: I heard your little car wash wasn’t half-bad. Congratulations are in order. Though I don’t believe I heard much about you out there breaking a sweat to wash those vehicles...
Lucas: You can congratulate the rest of the class when you see them.
Missy: Shame. I’d think if we put you out there front and center, you might’ve garnered a greater profit.
Lucas: Please.
Missy: You shouldn’t undersell yourself, Lucas. It worked for Chubbies, did it not?
If her increased patronage is any indication, then technically, yes. But Lucas doesn’t seem keen to acknowledge that. She moves closer and hops onto the lighting booth table, crossing her glossy legs where they are in perfectly accessible view. In a place where Riley often sits. It just feels wrong. Lucas averts his gaze, looking down at the soundboard instead.
Missy: Anyway, as cute as the fundraising effort is, I don’t exactly see the point.
Lucas: Well, for those of us not in the 1%, there’s this annoying everyday thing we have to do called “acquiring money.” I’m sure that’s probably confusing for you --
Missy: I meant for Adams. Or for the A class, more specifically. I don’t see why you all should be out there sweating through manual labor… when you could just ask me for the money.
Oh. Well that’s… an interesting proposition. Lucas is surprised she’s even offering it, enough to lift his head again to meet her eyes.
Lucas: … it’s hundreds of dollars…
Missy, coolly: Drop in the bucket. [ looking him over ] Surely you would know that by now.
Lucas hesitates, contemplating. Missy observes him, watching for the chinks in his armor. Those rare moments when he’s not as aloof and disdainful as their banter leads her to believe.
Lucas: I don’t see why you would help when it does nothing to benefit you.
Missy: Isn’t helping the class helping me in the end? [ off his skeptical eyebrow raise ] And oh, they’ll find a way to pay us back somehow. Every debt gets paid eventually. Name on an auditorium seat, plaque outside the lecture hall. That’s the charity solution to everything, slapping your name on something. I’m sure daddy would love to have the Bradford name in gold somewhere in this heap considering the chilly reception Hunter gave us when all this started.
Missy found about a dozen unintentional trigger words to throw in that sentence to change Lucas’s tune. Whether the most credit can be given to the word “charity,” or invoking Jack in a negative light is debatable, but Lucas is suddenly even stonier than before. He clenches his jaw.
Missy, softer: It’s not like you haven’t already accepted donations from the Bradford fortune… and that’s lightened the load, hasn’t it? Nothing wrong with that. [ a beat ] And you and me… I wouldn’t call us friends, but we certainly have… our own thing here. Don’t we? We… mean something. To one another.
Lucas drops his gaze again, cornered. The very insinuation that they have a relationship in any capacity makes him uncomfortable… but then, it’s not wrong, is it? If he’s willingly taking her money, knowingly, then that does symbolize some sort of association. He can’t in good conscience deny it, not when her money is a big chunk of the reason his future is even possible. And she could take all the pressure off them, off him, in an instant… no more fundraising… no more sweating over showdown… scholarships guaranteed…
But his instincts are stronger than that. It’s too good to be true. Everything comes with a cost, and while he might be willing to risk that here and there for his own feeble endeavors, he’s not going to tie his legacy and the rest of the class to it. He returns her eye contact, resolute.
Lucas: If your family wants to donate to the cause, then by all means do. But I’m not asking you for anything. I don’t beg.
Well said and well meant! For what it’s worth, Missy doesn’t seem put off by the rejection. If anything, she seems impressed by his stubborn resistance, even if she knows damn well it’s full of contradictions. Impressed, and definitely stirred by that same fire that captivated her the first time they met during the school board trial. The tension in the air makes that loud and clear.
Missy: No, no you don’t, do you. All part of your… provocative charm.
Message received, it appears… some message, at least… Missy slips off the table and begins to make her exit, assuring Lucas that she understands his perspective. Some things are better kept quiet, and she gets his need to maintain appearances -- and his pride.
Missy: It’s our little secret. And I get where we stand. [ with a smirk ] I think we understand each other better than one might assume.
The mere notion makes Lucas a bit queasy, but he keeps his mouth shut. Missy bids him adieu and disappears down the steps, wishing the Slumdog President the best of luck with his continuing financial campaigning.
Even once she’s gone, Lucas can’t shake off the discomfort of her presence. He has to get up, walk it off, gathering his things and fleeing from the space -- one of the few he’s never felt the need to escape from before.
EXT. HAVERFORD PREP - COURTYARD - DAY
Charlie is having lunch with BRIDGETTE GARDNER, occupying their typical table in the grassy outdoor space. She listens attentively as he catches her up on all of the stuff with their sisters, Charlie clearly seeking counsel from the one person who has been on the other side of this potential falling out. Does she think he should be worried, based on her own experience?
Bridgette: And you haven’t seen any of this for yourself?
Charlie: No, at least not yet. But I don’t think that means much -- I had no idea most of this stuff was going on with you until it was already way too late. When I first saw you having arguments with mom, it was volcano level.
Bridgette: To be fair, you were what, 14? Even younger than that when it all started. But true. Our family is really good at concealing the ugly, and then pretending it doesn’t exist when the moment has passed.
Charlie: And this is coming from Daisy. You know she wouldn’t make things up just for the hell of it.
Bridgette: Also true. She sure is an unaffected little freak. [ a beat ] I say that with love. Every Gardner has to be fucked up one way or another.
Still, with so little firsthand information, it’s hard to say. She doesn’t think Charlie should tie himself in knots trying to problem-solve something he can’t see, but…
Bridgette: Look out for Rosie if you can. You know, keep an eye out. If history is going to repeat itself, and she’s following in my forsaken footsteps… I don’t want her to go through that. She shouldn’t have to go through what I went through. Not that I’m not fine now --
Charlie: Right.
Bridgette: But she’s not tough like I am. And I mean that in the best way possible. Rosie… she’s sensitive. Sweet. Her heart is right there on her sleeve, even if she tries to act like she’s all grit. [ softly ] Reminds me of another sibling I’ve got.
Charlie smiles, but underneath the kind words she’s confirming his concerns. If the stormy energy around Rosie does whip up into a hurricane, then it’s looking more and more likely to be an unavoidable disaster. History may just repeat itself -- and more brutally than before.
INT. AAA - COSTUME LOFT - DAY
Rosie isn’t the only one in a tempestuous mood. Jade is in full-on crunch mode as her deadlines loom ever closer, and even though she’s been basically holed up in the costume loft at all hours she still feels miles from the finish line. She’s skipping lunch to wrap up a couple of last-minute additions to another piece of her portfolio, using Asher as her mannequin. Currently, he’s sporting a rather fancy, outlandishly patterned and bold blouse over his maroon polo. It looks like it could be a ‘70s dance shirt, or the wardrobe of a funky, flamboyant villain, or perhaps an especially stylish swashbuckling pirate… but it’s a Jade Beamon original, so it looks fantastic.
If only the job of mannequin was as fun as the clothes he’s modeling. Asher is gritting his teeth so hard they might crack, cringing every time Jade threads her needle through a piece of it or sticks a pin somewhere. She’s an expert, a professional, but given her stress level she’s missed the mark more than once the last couple of days.
Jade, snapping: If you didn’t wince every two seconds like a little baby, then maybe I would stick you less.
Asher: [ through his teeth ] The two dozen pin prick battle scars I have beg to differ!
Nigel picks that moment to enter, catching the tail-end of their sharp exchange and clocking the vibes immediately. He hesitates by the door, not sure whether he should come in and interrupt anymore or not, but Jade spots him before he can duck out. She immediately loses some of her unpleasantness, straightening up and clearing her throat.
Jade: Nigel.
Nigel: Um… hello. [ holding up lunch ] I know you’re working through lunch again, so I just thought I’d bring something by.
Jade: Oh, that’s… that’s nice. You don’t have to keep doing that.
Nigel: It’s all good. I like being able to help. It’s the least I could do, make sure you eat.
Asher: Someone should.
Jade: I’m still holding pins, Asher…
As if that wasn’t signal enough, Nigel bravely ventures the question of how costuming is going this afternoon. Jade claims it’s all fine, and Asher repeats her comment in a tone that makes it very clear he doesn’t agree. Sensing that the best friends might benefit from a break from one another, Nigel offers to hang around and be her stand-in for a while.
Jade: Really?
Asher, hopeful: Really?
Nigel: Sure. All I have to do is stand there and look pretty, right? Think I can manage that. You know, if I clear the costumer’s standards, of course.
Jade: No, no you -- of course. Of course you do. You’re more than -- obviously, you’re up to standard. I mean, above. I, um…
Asher can’t help but laugh, but he hides it behind a fake sneeze. Jade shoots him a glare, then states it would be preferable actually for him to take Asher’s place for now. It seems like Bird Bones agrees, hopping down from the step stool and carefully removing the fanciful top.
Asher: It’s for the best anyway. I’m supposed to be helping Dylan proofread his college essays. I want to check mine one more time too -- Jade says reading them over seven times is more than enough, but pot meet kettle.
Nigel: A Dylan Orlando personal essay, huh? I’d pay to see that.
Asher: I’m sure he’d let you read it for no charge. One of the applications he’s filling out had the prompt to “describe a work of art from the last century that surprised, inspired, or challenged you and in what way,” so he wrote a whole thesis statement on why Taylor Swift’s album Lover is the most important contribution to art, culture, and society since the invention of music.
Nigel: Wow.
Jade: Of course he did.
Asher: I’ll be genuinely surprised if it’s not a video essay on his vlog in like four months. But you know what, no admissions officer can say he doesn’t have enthusiasm.
True that! Asher makes his grateful exit, handing the piece over to Nigel and wishing him luck. Jade giggles nervously once they’re alone, Nigel smiling and asking if he should just put the shirt on and stand where Asher was. She confirms, avoiding her gaze by digging through her sewing kit until he’s all set and ready to be pinned and needled.
Nigel: I hope I’m doing your work justice.
Jade: You, um… it’s good. You’re good. Ha ha.
She nervously pushes some hair behind her ear, then steps closer to get back to work. If anything can overpower shyness, it’s the stress of an impending deadline upon which your entire future rests. Jade softly explains to Nigel what she’s doing as she does it, since he’s never been her model before, and reassures her that he’s not worried and she can do whatever.
Nigel: I trust you, Jade. You are the expert, after all.
Jade glances up at him, processing the compliment. The declaration of trust. The fact that they’re standing so close, that if he just stepped down off the stool they’d be close enough to… it’s a lot. Sophomore year Jade would probably have ran and hid by now, if not passed out.
But this is the present, and Jade has work to do. So she swallows her butterflies and focuses on her needlework.
Quiet settles over them for a minute, then Nigel speaks again, barely above a whisper.
Nigel: You’re incredible, you know that?
Jade: Huh?
Caught by surprise, Jade’s hand slips… and accidentally sticks Nigel with the needle. He winces and she immediately launches into apologies, retracting her hands to drop the needle and asking if he’s okay. He promises he’s fine, keeping her from spiraling over it by taking her hand so she can’t drift any further away in retreat.
Nigel: Really, I’m good.
Jade: … so you were saying?
Nigel: Yeah. I just wanted you to know… I hope you know how amazing you are. I know you’re super stressed about all this and what these schools and programs are going to think of you, but they’d be insane to reject you.
Jade: I don’t know if I’d go that far.
Nigel: I would. I mean, you’ve made basically every costume we’ve worn for the last three years -- which I know everyone keeps throwing back at you -- and they’re fantastic. Not just because they look good, which they always do, but they’re durable. No matter how gorgeous they look, they can withstand a lot. When we finish a production, they’re worn in, but it’s still as if they’re freshly stitched. That’s impressive. Trust me, I’ve been in enough local Shakespeare productions to say so. One time a piece of my tunic fell off in the middle of the first act.
Jade laughs, charmed by the story and calmed enough by his gentle tone to actually breathe. Nigel smiles at her, fond.
Nigel: You’re reliable. That’s the best thing a person can be, in my opinion. And you’re talented to the extreme, hard-working, humble… I mean, is there anything you can’t do?
Jade: [ with a snort ] Socialize.
The word slips out, and Jade is instantly embarrassed by it. She hides her blush in digging to grab her needles again, going back to work as an excuse not to elaborate.
Nigel: Seriously? You’ve never struck me as without company. With the techies --
Jade: Oh, yeah, that’s the height of engagement. Just me and a bunch of emotionally inept teenage boys plus Dora, getting up to the same old shenanigans. Every girl’s dream. [ with a sigh ] Don’t get me wrong, I love them. Especially Asher, he’s my best friend. And I’m not saying I’m like, a recluse or anything, I have friends, I just… I don’t know. I don’t even know why I’m talking about this. Sorry.
Nigel: No worries. I don’t mind. But for what it’s worth, I don’t see you that way. Anyone would be lucky to have you as a friend. I know I am. [ a beat ] Or like, any kind of relationship…
Jade coughs, not prepared for that. She giggles compulsively again, frantically brushing off the thought as she focuses intently on pinning a piece of the fabric into place.
Jade: I haven’t… ha, I’m so busy, I… a relationship… I don’t have the time to even…
Though she can’t form a coherent sentence, Nigel gets the message. Not available right now. And he admittedly looks a bit disappointed, but he puts his acting credit to use and swiftly covers with another smile.
Nigel: Well, again. Anyone would be lucky. And in the meantime, I’m just happy to support you however I can. Even at risk of puncture wound.
Jade absorbs this, unable to hold back her shy smile. She murmurs a thank you, then hides by throwing all her attention to the task at hand.
But for Nigel, the only thing he can focus on is her. So incredible… and so close… as the easy bass line floats in…
INT. AAA - LECTURE HALL - DAY
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “How Deep Is Your Love” as performed by Bee Gees || Performed by Nigel Chey (feat. Dylan Orlando)
The lights are low and the set-up is simple, just Nigel on the stage with a microphone stand and sporting the finished product of one of Jade’s ‘70s costumes -- a glossy gold suit, styled like Saturday Night Fever, over a black silk shirt. He’s shimmering like a disco ball under the stage lights, reflecting the whimsical, dreamy quality of the number.
The only other person on the stage with him is Dylan, accompanying him on bass and providing back-up vocals. He’s dressed much simpler, dressed in black and wearing his custom-made Jade Beamon original suit jacket from junior prom. His hair is the ‘70s-ified element, swept up and combed back like John Travolta. While he happily lets Nigel hog the spotlight, he does take a moment in the performance to wink to Asher in the audience.
INT. AAA - COSTUME LOFT - DAY
Intercut with the performance, we check back in with Nigel and Jade in the loft, doing a metaphorical dance of their own around each other as Jade costumes. There’s something surprisingly amorous about the set-up when it’s paired with the ballad. Jade remains oblivious, studiously sewing away, but the romantic tension is more than apparent, in Nigel’s expression and the smooth delivery of his vocals as he looks at her.
And you may not think I care for you When you know down inside that I really do…
INT. AAA - LECTURE HALL - DAY
While she’s good at avoiding him while at work, Jade can’t keep her eyes off Nigel during the performance. Clarissa, Haley, and Asher cast knowing glances at her, but she doesn’t pay them any attention. In the back seats, Nate, Dave, and Jeff sway along to the beat playfully.
Cause we're living in a world of fools Breaking us down when they all should let us be
Ultimately, though, even if certain truths remain unsaid, what can’t be denied is an excellent performance. Nigel brings it home with grace, understated as always but, in this case, pretty swoonworthy.
We belong to you and me…
INT. BABINEAUX HOME - ZAY’S BEDROOM - NIGHT
Zay is on the phone with Riley, the latter walking him through all of the bulletins from that day’s showdown discussion. He listens eagerly, living vicariously, but it’s obvious he’s also frustrated that he’s being excluded. He reminds Riley that they can call on him at any time to brainstorm on choreography or reevaluate concepts, but she gently waves him off by insisting she doesn’t want to put any additional pressure on him.
Zay: Well, to be honest, not being consulted kind of makes me feel more --
Riley: Oh, shoot, Maya’s here. She’s supposed to be meeting with Farkle after his therapist appointment this evening, so I’m sure she just has a bunch of notes she wants to Maya-splain to me first.
Zay: If she wants to get on speaker, then she could --
Riley: I’ll see you tomorrow, okay? And I’ll let you know if anything major happens. Love you!
Zay: But Riley --
She hangs up before he can get a word in, even a goodbye. He sighs and drops his phone on his bed, pulling his laptop back towards him. He has his applications webpage open, where he’s painstakingly attempting to piece together the final elements of his portfolio. It’s not in bad shape, but with the glooming reality of his booted foot and inability to make anything more, it doesn’t feel like enough. It feels like being trapped.
He grabs his phone again, obviously wanting to talk to someone about it. But he can’t talk to Riley -- he knows she’s busy. He can’t talk to Yindra. He can’t talk to Maya -- and nor would he want to, thank you very much.
Charlie…
He could talk to Charlie. God, he wants to talk to Charlie. And they’ve opened up the lines of communication again, haven’t they? Couldn’t it be easy, like it was before? All he has to do is say something… but he doesn’t know what that would be. It’s still confusing and twisted up inside him. And whatever happened with Haverford at the car wash is admittedly suspicious, though it just doesn’t feel right to think Charlie would do something like that.
Confusing. Complicated. Stuck. He’s stuck, stuck, stuck.
INT. THERAPIST’S OFFICE - NIGHT
Farkle plops down onto Dr. Han’s couch, releasing a dramatic sigh and telling her there’s much to discuss (as there usually is). He starts to rattle off about the showdown drama because of Zay’s injury and how he and Isadora dumped water on their greatest rival at the moment, but Dr. Han carefully interrupts. She explains that there’s actually something she wants to open this appointment with, something that she thinks it’s important to start exploring as soon as possible. Farkle is confused but intrigued, sitting upright and gesturing for her to go on.
She turns to her notes, pulling out a couple of prepared informational sheets and taking on a gentler, more professional tone. She explains that after their last few meetings, she thought a lot about some of the patterns Farkle had been mentioning in his recovery. She decided to follow her hunch and do a little more research, and she thinks she’s landed on what might be the root after conferring with his primary care physician.
Dr. Han: It’s my belief that you show all the clear symptoms of bipolar disorder.
It’s like all the air gets sucked out of the room. Farkle freezes, staring at her, but words stop making sense. She continues to explain how common it is for it to be misdiagnosed as depression, how now they can focus on proper treatment for his actual affliction, how it’s just as manageable with the right approach, but it’s like she’s talking underwater. Everything feels hazy, static, like Farkle is suddenly a thousand miles away.
Farkle: No. No, I -- I can’t be.
Dr. Han: I understand that an unexpected diagnosis can be intimidating. And bipolar disorder, like most mental conditions, is shrouded in a lot of misrepresentation and stigma. But with the right perspective --
Farkle: I’m not. I can’t… I have to go.
Farkle blankly gets to his feet, suddenly certain he has to get out of there. It’s like he’s underwater now too, like he can’t breathe. Dr. Han warns that he’s likely just having a strong reaction to the news, anxiety, but she assures him that the diagnosis does not change anything about him or his prospects. If anything, it will improve things, because now they can confront his reality with the right tools. And it will be safest for him to just relax here and process it during their session.
But no, Farkle can’t stay. He numbly repeats that he has to go, ignoring Dr. Han’s disagreement and stepping out of the office.
INT. THERAPIST’S BUILDING - HALLWAY - NIGHT
Farkle doesn’t stop until he’s fully out of her space, back in the endless office sprawl of a building like this. He waits a moment, dreading Dr. Han chasing after him and dragging him back in there, but she doesn’t come. He collapses back against the door, releasing a shaky exhale and screwing his eyes shut.
Bipolar. He’s bipolar.
A gentle piano begins to play, an iconic familiar riff while we stay close on Farkle’s face.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “All By Myself” as performed by Eric Carmen || Performed by Farkle Minkus & Zay Babineaux
Farkle takes the first lines of this legendary ode to isolation, singing them softly as the camera slowly eases away from him. The further away we pull, the more his sense of smallness grows, dwarfed by the hallway that seems to stretch on forever.
When I was young, I never needed anyone… those days are gone…
INT. BABINEAUX HOME - ZAY’S BEDROOM - NIGHT
Zay pushes off his mattress and rises to his feet, going a bit too fast at first out of habit and nearly stumbling on his bad ankle. He cringes, falling back on the edge of the bed to right himself. He huffs and hides his head in his hands, easing into the next lines.
Living alone, I think of all the friends I’ve known But when I dial the telephone, nobody’s home…
EXT. THERAPIST’S BUILDING - NIGHT
Farkle emerges onto the steps of the building in the financial district just in time to launch into the chorus. He carries on singing as he begins to make his way home, weaving through the streets and other passersby as if he’s invisible. Although he’s clearly emotional, it’s evident the information hit him hard, because he’s not at all at his usual level of verve.
INT. BABINEAUX HOME - ZAY’S BEDROOM - NIGHT
Zay keeps it tamped down whenever it passes back to him as well, though his limitations are outside of his control. He spends his portion of the vocals at his window, leaning out to breath in the life and excitement of the city he loves that he feels so locked out of.
Whether within or without the city, for vastly different reasons, both Zay and Farkle are feeling the same ache.
INT. MINKUS HOME - NIGHT
Farkle makes it home in time for the piano solo, showing off his proficiency on the instrument lest we dared to forget. Then he and Zay harmonize on the final, showstopping chorus, delivering a whammy even when they’re not quite in top form.
INT. BABINEAUX HOME - ZAY’S BEDROOM - NIGHT
Zay rounds out the number, stepping away from his window and shutting it forlornly.
INT. MINKUS HOME - FARKLE’S BEDROOM - NIGHT
Maya is back to brainstorming in the Minkus home as promised, pacing in front of the moodboard they’ve been working off of for weeks. She’s avidly running through potential pitfalls to their showdown prospects, which seem to be piling up by the minute, while Farkle is seated on the edge of his bed. He’s stone-faced, truly lost in his own head now, and Maya doesn’t fail to notice. As she’s ticking off more items on their doomsday list, she halts and gives him an unimpressed glare.
Maya: … and an inattentive diva. [ snapping in his face ] Farkle! Earth to Farkle!
Farkle: What? Oh, sorry.
Maya: I swear, you have been exceptionally offbeat this week. Of all the times, too, naturally it would be our greatest time of crisis that your zany passion eludes us. Honestly, Farkle, where for art thou? Why have you abandoned me in our time of need?
Farkle: I’m bipolar.
Maya: Okay? And I’m a narcissist. Just because we use pretty words doesn’t change the state of the union, darling.
Farkle, shaky: No, like, I’m literally bipolar.
Maya pauses, actually looking at him. His tone convinces her that he’s not being cheeky, and his sallow expression drives it home. Her demeanor shifts instantly, dropping much of her diva arrogance.
Maya: What?
Farkle: I’m bipolar. I don’t know how many more times I can say it.
Maya: I heard you, I just -- when? How?
Farkle: My whole life, presumably. How, ask God for me.
Maya: Well… well, like, what does that mean? Like, so you’re bipolar, well, what does that mean for --
Farkle: I don’t know. I don’t know, my psychiatrist just told me. I didn’t… I didn’t do a great job of listening to what came after that.
Wow. Silence reigns as Maya attempts to process this new information. Farkle speaks again, even more uncharacteristically timid than before.
Farkle: I know this is bad timing. Just… with this, and everything at school, I don’t know how on top of it I can --
Maya: No, no, of course not. Shh. It’s fine. You don’t have to worry about all that. You need to focus on yourself. On this. Don’t worry about Triple A. I’ll handle it.
Farkle: But Maya --
Maya: I’ve got it. It’s okay.
She pats his shoulders reassuringly, then turns it into a hug. Farkle hesitates for a moment before returning the embrace, desperately leaning into the comfort. Maya remains stalwart for the both of them, features intense as her mind runs to problem-solve a million miles an hour. Based on the furrow of her brow, it seems she might already be onto something.
Maya: I’m going to handle it.
INT. ERIC’S APARTMENT - NIGHT
Riley, Isadora and Eric sit around the dining table, chatting casually after finishing their meals. Eric looks between the two girls with a warm smile before offering to clear up.
Riley: I’ll help.
Riley gets up to help Eric clean away the plates, but Isadora places a hand on Riley’s arm to stop her. Riley gives her a questioning look.
Isadora: I actually… I have something I want to show you. In my room. [ to Eric ] If that’s okay?
Eric: Of course, go ahead. I’m perfectly capable of filling up the dishwasher on my own.
Intrigued, Riley follows Isadora into her bedroom.
INT. ERIC’S APARTMENT - ISADORA’S BEDROOM - NIGHT
Isadora goes straight to her desk and opens up a notebook to reveal Valerie’s letter. She passes it to a confused Riley, who takes a moment to look over it. When she realizes what it is, she looks up at Isadora with wide eyes.
Riley: Is this…?
Isadora: [ with a nod ] A letter to my father. I found it in one of Val’s boxes. You’re the first person I’m telling so don’t… don’t tell Eric or anything.
Riley: Oh, totally. Sure. [ a beat as she scans through the pages ] Why aren’t you telling him, though?
Isadora: I don’t really know how I feel about it yet.
Riley guides Isadora to her bed, where they both sit. She collects her thoughts.
Riley: Did you know anything about your dad before now?
Isadora: No. I asked about him a few times, like ages ago, but Valerie always claimed she didn’t know who he was. I can’t tell if she was lying or not; I don’t even know when she wrote this.
Riley: It seems like she didn’t really think about it until he wrote to her. And it definitely seems like he wants to be part of your life. [ a beat ] Do you want him in your life?
Isadora: I don’t know. I don’t even know what that would look like. My gut is screaming at me that it’ll end in disaster, like it always did with my mom, but at the same time… like, I’ve gotten by fine without a dad until now, but it does feel there’s a part of me missing. What if it’s him?
It’s clear that she’s been thinking it over a lot. Riley admits that she isn’t sure what she could say to help considering her complete lack of experience in this department, but suggests again that she should talk to Eric.
Isadora: I’m scared to.
Riley: What? Why?
Isadora: I don’t want him to think that he’s not enough for me. He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me, and I don’t want to ruin it.
Riley places a hand on Isadora’s shoulder and offers a sympathetic smile. Isadora responds by resting her head on Riley’s shoulder, so Riley moves her arm to wrap around her.
Riley: You know how much Eric cares for you. There’s nothing you could do to ruin it. You’re part of the Matthews family forever now, no matter who your father is and whether you meet him or not.
Isadora: You’re my favorite cousin.
Riley: I won’t tell Auggie you said that. And you’re my favorite cousin, too.
Riley plants a kiss on Isadora’s cheek with a ‘muah.’ Isadora pulls a face of disgust and escapes from her grasp as Riley giggles.
Isadora: Minus five cousin points. Auggie’s in the lead now.
Riley: Nooo!
She chases after Isadora, trying to engulf her in a hug as both girls laugh.
INT. GARDNER HOME - CHARLIE’S BEDROOM - NIGHT
Charlie is back from a late rehearsal for showdown, changing out of his Haverford uniform. He strips off his shirt and places it in the laundry hamper, checking how his clothes from the car wash are faring.
Still damp. At this rate, it feels like they’re never going to go back to normal.
Suddenly, the house below him erupts with sound, voices being raised in the kitchen downstairs. It goes without saying, but raised voices are almost non-existent in the Gardner household. Charlie freezes, listening intently until he recognizes exactly what he’s dreading -- a higher-pitched, defensive voice. Rosie’s voice.
He drops the wet clothes and reaches for the first top he can find -- which just happens to be an AAA sweatshirt -- and yanks it on as he rushes into the hall.
INT. GARDNER HOME - KITCHEN - NIGHT
This time, there’s no question as to whether there is a fight. Rosie and ELEANOR GARDNER are more heated than we’ve ever seen either of them onscreen, yelling at one another and cheeks flushed. Rosie is particularly loud, in near hysterics since she’s young, emotional, and also on defense; Eleanor maintains a cool, superior tone even as she raises her volume.
Charlie slides into the room right in the thick of it, jumping in the middle without hesitation and questioning what the heck is going on. When he can get them to acknowledge him, Eleanor actually seems pleased by his presence, openly welcoming him into the argument.
Eleanor: Oh, perfect, just what we needed. A second opinion. Rosamund, why don’t you tell your brother why you’re in trouble? Go on.
Rosie, on the other hand, is not receptive to Charlie joining the conversation. She loses a lot of her fire, shrinking back and face flushing in embarrassment. Eleanor scoffs, though it seems like this is exactly how she expected her to react.
Eleanor: What’s the matter? Are you suddenly shy? You sure were loud enough arguing back to me about it, and now you won’t tell Charlie?
Charlie: Can someone just tell me what’s going on?!
Eleanor: Gladly!
Eleanor pointedly places Rosie’s phone on the countertop, which she’s been holding the whole time. It’s open to an Instagram photo on an unfamiliar page, one of Rosie’s new friends at her gifted high school. It’s a series of photos from some hangout the freshmen were having, but the photo in question surprisingly features another familiar player -- a bunch of the freshmen are sitting around and laughing, and Rosie is grinning while sitting on the lap of URI MINKUS.
It’s pretty innocent, but the implications are enough. Eleanor relays the whole tale, how one of Rosie’s friends from Catholic school told their mom about the photo in her tagged images and the mother was kind enough to inform Eleanor about it. This is already after a discussion she had with Rosie over this boy when she saw them interacting in a less-than-acceptable manner after school when she picked her up. She thought they had cleared it all up, but apparently not, between this photo and the fact that the text messages between her and this Jewish boy are nothing if not flirtatious.
Rosie: You shouldn’t have even been going through my texts anyway!
Eleanor: Oh, shouldn’t I? I didn’t realize you were the authority now! Privacy is a privilege, Rosamund, and you’re continuing to prove that you haven’t earned it!
They continue to escalate again, Charlie bewildered as he slides the phone towards him to get a better look. The photo really is so… nothing, and the whole argument feels so blown out of proportion. But Charlie knows the patterns, he knows what Bridgette warned him about, and all of the shouting and conflict is making him lightheaded.
Charlie, weary: Stop arguing.
Eleanor: I knew we shouldn’t have let you go to the gifted school. I knew you’d be better off staying in the Catholic system.
Rosie: Then why did you let me go?!
Eleanor: Maybe I shouldn’t have! Maybe that’s the thing I shouldn’t have done! In fact, maybe I’ll have to put a call into the deans and see if they can’t transfer you back --
Rosie, mortified: Mom, no!
Charlie: Stop…
The room is starting to spin a little bit. Charlie braces himself against the countertop, screwing his eyes shut and trying to block out the yelling. But he can’t run from it. He can’t hide.
Rosie: Charlie got to go to a different school! He got to go somewhere new without you breathing down his neck!
Eleanor: Because Charlie is responsible enough to handle it! You don’t see him posting suggestive content, flirting shamelessly, making questionable decisions. I don’t need to monitor your brother because he doesn’t give me any reason to be concerned!
Oh, Eleanor, if only you knew… it’s being invoked and talked about in such a discordant way that acts as the final straw. Charlie tries to catch his breath, but it’s not coming back, and it’s like the whole world is slipping away from him…
If anything will stop an argument, passing out probably does the trick. Charlie stumbles and then collapses onto the tile floor, shocking both Eleanor and Rosie out of their anger. Rosie shrieks and rushes to his side.
Eleanor: Charlie?! Ambrose! [ rushing to the entryway ] Ambrose, Charlie’s -- come quickly! Hurry!
Charlie’s down, all right. Rosie rolls him onto his back, checking for obvious injury -- lucky he didn’t crack his head open or something -- and trying to rouse him. But he’s out like a light… all of the tension slowly fading away…
INT. HAVERFORD PREP - AUDITORIUM - NIGHT
Meanwhile, Brandon is staying late at Haverford once again, only this time he’s not alone. He’s meeting with a mysterious figure, a HIPSTER 20-something man who is probably into photography or a wannabe filmmaker. But he’s clearly there on business, Brandon and the man speaking in hushed tones as they converse even though they’re the only ones around.
Brandon: And you’re sure you’ve got the whole thing? I’m not paying for poor quality or fractions.
Hipster: I’ve been doing this for six years. Think I know what I’m doing at this point. But yes, it’s all there. Professional quality. You’ll be able to see whatever you need to see.
Brandon deems this response satisfactory enough, nodding. He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a small wad of cash, trading it off with whatever object the hipster is offering. When they retract their hands, Brandon comes away with the secret item -- a flash drive.
He scrutinizes it idly while the hipster quickly counts the bills, then they exchange a nod, Brandon thanking him for his service. The hipster makes his exit, Brandon pacing for a bit on the stage and turning over the flash drive in his fingers. Whatever it is, he seems pretty satisfied to have it in his grasp.
He loses some of his easygoing confidence when he hears the auditorium doors open. He slips the flash drive into his blazer pocket and straightens up, narrowing his eyes to assess his new company. When he recognizes who it is, though, an intrigued smirk blooms across his face.
Brandon: Well, well, well. I have to say, this is an unexpected surprise.
Maya Hart. Dressed in one of her sharpest ensembles, Valerie’s fur coat giving her that extra oomph, matching Brandon’s cool sophistication effortlessly. She leisurely saunters her way down the aisle towards the stage, taking her sweet time.
Maya: So this is the fabled Haverford Prep. [ pursing her lips ] I have to say, I was anticipating greater grandeur.
Brandon: It’s hard when the indigent experience excellence for the first time. Never quite meets the expectations of their hapless daydreams… [ off her sneer ] Is there something I can do for you, Hart? Let alone at this late hour?
Maya: Don’t flatter yourself. It’s 8PM.
She’s made her way to the stage now, coming to stand opposite Brandon front and center. There’s a healthy distance between them, keeping them staunchly on opposing sides, but they regard each other with respect. Maya claims she just wanted to come have a little chat, clan leader to clan leader.
Brandon: That so? I thought Friar was your figurehead.
Maya: We both have our respective areas of expertise. I like to think of myself as the Cheney to his Bush. Conservative politics notwithstanding.
Brandon: Was going to say. I don’t see Cheney being much of a swinger for socialist handouts like you all are gunning for. [ sizing her up ] But I’ll admit, I pegged you for a captain rather than a lackey. You sure took front and center at the car wash.
Maya: Ah, yes… the function you so ceremoniously soiled.
Brandon: Hope you’ll forgive the incursion. It’s only business. A little competitive spirit is all.
Maya: Oh, no arguments from me. I’m more incensed I didn’t see it coming. Wish I had thought of it myself.
Brandon chuckles, perhaps a bit won over by her… unique Maya charms. He claims he got the sense they were more alike than different… in fact, if circumstances were different, and they weren’t sworn rivals… Maya catches onto his drift right quick, mirroring his smug charisma as she feigns sympathy.
Maya: So you like what you see. Don’t despair, you’re far from the only one. But I’m afraid that’s a forgone impossibility.
Brandon: [ processing what might be a rejection ] Ah. I see. [ like they’re confidants ] You play for the other team?
Well. That’s a pretty bold assumption to jump to just because she doesn’t want to get with you, Brandon. But Maya maintains her coolness, unperturbed by such arrogant conclusions. She makes a face, as if she’s contemplating.
Maya: … no team. Let’s put it that way.
Brandon: And what’s that supposed to mean exactly?
Maya: The only team I play for is Triple A. And that’s what I’m here for.
Brandon backs off his advances and allows her the floor, back to all business. She tactfully begins to discuss negotiations around senior showdown, dancing around the details of everything going wrong inside the ranks of the A class but letting just enough of her cards show to indicate that she’s only here due to dire circumstances. Then she subtly tries to charm her way to an ideal outcome, brokering a deal where maybe, just perhaps, Haverford might find themselves on the losing side of the showdown confrontation.
You know she’s desperate if Maya is trying to arrange a thrown victory. And Brandon can sense that too, even as aloof as she’s acting, which just makes the whole situation more amusing to him. Though he feigned listening to her pitch, he is all too eager to shoot it down. Why would Haverford want to throw the competition, he muses, when their winning streak is so hot and their competition is apparently so weak?
Brandon: I knew you all were hardly a threat, but this is even more pathetic than I thought. I mean, you and Friar coming to me trying to cut a deal for an easy victory -- what a leadership duo. You all must be in harsher condition than I imagined.
Maya: Wait, what?
Brandon: … you didn’t know? That your president already paid me a little visit earlier in the semester?
Maya doesn’t respond, but the way she’s lost her easy confidence as she stares at him answers for her. Brandon laughs, shaking his head.
Brandon: What presidential teamwork. Clearly, the future of Adams is in outstanding hands. But with such low confidence, and even lower moves you’ll stoop to… no, I believe Haverford is just fine where we are now. We’ll beat you handily, as we have for the last six years, and rest assured Hart, it’ll be with immense pleasure. [ a beat ] You should probably be going, then. The security doesn’t take kindly to riff-raff hanging around our hallowed halls.
He swivels and swaggers offstage, leaving Maya alone and humiliated in enemy territory. She’s fuming, gritting her teeth and fists clenched at her sides.
INT. CHUBBIES - NIGHT
Riley is seated at the counter with her laptop, keeping Lucas company while he works the late shift. She’s running through analytics of the RSVPs they’ve already gotten for the dance fundraiser, which she claims is looking pretty good.
Lucas isn’t in a very optimistic mood, commenting that even if they get half of Manhattan to show up, it probably won’t be enough to cover all their expenses including the scholarships. With their chances at showdown dwindling by the minute… who knows. Maybe he’s not doing absolutely everything he can to make it happen…
Riley closes her laptop, giving him her undivided attention.
Riley: Don’t count Triple A out of showdown just yet, please and thank you. But I think I know what this is really about.
Lucas hesitates, freezing up.
Lucas: You do?
Riley: Yeah. You act like you’re so hard to read, like I don’t know you well enough to figure out when you’re not telling me something.
How could she know… did Zay tell her about seeing Missy in the booth? He swallows. She reaches across the counter and takes his hands, giving him a sympathetic look.
Riley: You’re freaking out over the college essays.
Lucas: Oh. [ a beat ] Yeah, well, I guess I am.
Riley reminds him that he doesn’t have to keep that kind of stuff from her and act like he’s unshakeable all the time. And honestly, she gets why he’s nervous about them. It sucks writing about yourself no matter what -- unless you’re Maya -- but it’ll be even harder for him given the things he’s been through. He hasn’t exactly been encouraged to view himself favorably, at least not until recently. Old habits are hard to break.
Riley: But that’s not necessarily what they’re looking for anyway. You don’t need to prove to them that you’re the most perfect shining candidate to ever apply, you just need to give them a really good story. Make them invested, get them to care about you. Show them a bit of your individuality, your personality -- which you are not short of in either department. And I know for a fact you can draw people in…
She is, after all, a prime example. Lucas still seems doubtful, but her perspective does help. And her belief in him continues to astound him, forged in steel even when everything else feels so unpredictable. Riley leans forward to give him a soft kiss, which lingers between them.
It’s impressive, too, how being with her grounds him. How their closeness doesn’t feel like an intrusion… and somehow, feeling cornered by other forces or put on edge just makes him want to be with her more. Lucas initiates another kiss, forgetting everything else for a moment, taking shelter in that inexplicable safety with her. Riley has no complaints, leaning deeper into it and tightening her touch on his hand.
Then the front door bangs open, the bell jangling ominously. Both of them jump and pull apart. Maya marches into the diner, indignant and blue eyes burning.
Maya: What the hell, Friar?
Lucas: What’s the matter with you now?
Riley: Is everything okay?
Maya: When were you going to tell me you shook down Brandon?
Riley: [ whipping to look at him ] What?
Lucas clams up, straightening upright and taking on a defensive stance. But the sheepish expression on his face gives him away. Busted.
Maya: You know, I think that kind of mercenary maneuver is exactly the sort of decision your VP should know about. Were you just never going to let me in on it?
Riley: Why the hell did you do that?
Maya: I don’t care about that. Friar’s a shady bastard, we all knew his methods were going to be far from clean. Who gives a shit. I’m pissed he decided not to keep me in the loop! Do you have any idea how humiliating it was for me to roll up there only for Brandon Rivas to hand my ass to me on a silver platter? Cocky prick, like he knows absolutely everything --
Riley: Wait, wait. [ eyeing her ] Why were you confronting Brandon?
Oh. Well. Cough. Maya flips her hair off her shoulder, but she can’t give a good excuse that doesn’t make her just as culpable as Lucas. He raises his eyebrows at her, emphasizing that if he’s going down she’s going with him. Riley closes her eyes, trying to catch up to this turn of events.
Riley: Let me get this straight. Both of you went to our competition, at separate times, to try and threaten them into… what? Giving up? Throwing the showdown?
Lucas: I just thought that --
Maya: Our prospects are in shambles even without the money. I was just --
Lucas: And I didn’t want you to be disappointed --
Maya: Everyone is counting on me, we’ve all got a lot riding on --
Riley: Okay, okay, stop. Enough!
Riley holds her hands up, getting them both to shut up. She takes a moment to compose herself, taking a deep breath, then she jumps into fixer mode.
Riley: This must be the week for damage control, because now you’ve really done it. You realize now we’re going to have to bring it even harder, since you’ve made it perfectly clear to Brandon and the Havies that we’re spooked. You wouldn’t go and grovel for mercy if we weren’t.
Lucas: That wasn’t --
Maya, scoffing: I do not grovel --
Riley: I cannot believe you would do something so stupid. [ to Lucas ] And that you would do something like this and not tell me…
Oof… hit him where it hurts, Riles. Lucas lowers his head, avoiding her eyes. Case in point, it doesn’t make anybody look very good. And now, Riley proclaims, she has to fix it once again.
Riley: We’re going to have to brainstorm fast for showdown and make sure everything is in pristine shape, which we already know is a shot in the dark. Call Yindra, tell her to come by our place in twenty. I’ll see if we can get Jeff and Isadora too.
Riley puts her belongings back in her bag and hops off the stool, Maya already heading out. Riley goes to follow her, but she pauses in the doorway and glances back over her shoulder at Lucas. She shakes her head, obviously disappointed.
Riley: I can’t believe you.
She leaves it there, pushing through the doors without another word. Lucas looks after her, ashamed, then curses to himself and lightly hits the counter with his palm.
Break 2.
EXT. DANCE LOT - DREAM SEQUENCE - NIGHT
Charlie is sprawled on the asphalt, just like when he collapsed, the city uncharacteristically quiet around him. When he comes around he jolts upright, spooked at being outside and on his own. He looks around in confusion, no clue where he is or how he got there. He slowly gets to his feet, recognizing the dance lot as a place he’s been before, but unsure where exactly it is or where to go next.
Only one clue exists to help guide him. Music.
It’s quiet, muffled, but he can hear it. A thumping bass, hypnotic beat… he spins until he zeroes in on the source. A heavy metal door installed into the wall opposite him, propped open just slightly, with a neon sign above indicating it’s likely some kind of club. Colorful light leaks out from the crack, mesmerizing and more than intriguing.
But it’s really the music that wins him over. He’s a dancer, and he cannot resist a compelling groove. He cautiously approaches the door, pulling it open and then stepping inside… as the faraway rhythms slowly become a familiar tune...
INT. DANCE CLUB - DREAM SEQUENCE - NIGHT
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Voulez-Vous” as performed by Mamma Mia! Original Movie Cast || Performed by AAA Seniors & Haverford Seniors
The rambunctious ABBA classic kicks off with a bang, music loud and boldly setting the scene. The lighting is mysterious, electric, the fully romanticized version of what a sultry, exciting disco scene might be like. Charlie is no longer dressed in his everyday clothes but is suddenly styled to match the vibes, sporting a sleek disco suit with Riley’s aforementioned blue dress shirt completing the look.
And as he ventures deeper into the club, he discovers he’s not alone. The place is packed with his classmates both current and former, Haverford populating one side and Adams the other, but all dressed in similar, near identical, disco suits. All eyes lock on him the moment he’s within view, judging him, waiting for him to make a move -- or pick a side.
The vocals start, and Charlie does neither, jumping down from the steps and sliding into the center of the glowing dance floor -- right down the middle of party lines. He starts the number dancing alone, challenging the established status quo in the club, tension mounting around his transgression of crossing lines…
Until Zay pushes through the crowd on the A class side. On both feet, looking fly as ever, no injury in sight and nothing holding him back from showing his stuff.
And here we go again, we know the start, we know the end Masters of the scene
Charlie pauses, locking eyes with Zay. For a moment, finishing up the pre-chorus, they just hold eye contact… letting that tension bubble over…
Then Zay jumps into the center of the floor with him, joining in the dance.
Voulez-vous!
For the first chorus it’s just Zay and Charlie, dancing sometimes together and sometimes in contrast, epitomizing the back-and-forth pull between them. But it’s them, so the dancing is remarkably good, and especially satisfying considering how long it’s been since we saw them share a routine. Their timing and chemistry is just as sharp as ever, and it’s also a relief just to see Zay be able to move again.
Throughout the second verse, they weave back into their respective schools, Charlie’s peers still eyeing each other suspiciously and reluctant to break rank. But Zay manages to get Riley out on the dance floor (with Lucas in tow), and then Charlie nudges Evan. Bit by bit the classes mix and mingle, caught somewhere between dancing in tandem and facing off like foes. This becomes especially pronounced during the bridge about 3 and half minutes in, when the chorus becomes stripped and just relies on “ahas,” Charlie leading the Haverford delegation and Zay fronting the A class as they mirror movements and poses.
Then they officially bleed together, classmates crossing into opposite territory for the final chorus. For those who don’t already have a pair in their respective class (unlike say, Dylan and Asher), they pair with someone from the opposite school, like Brandon and Maya.
And, naturally, Zay and Charlie. They’re back together at the center of it all, intensity rising with the music, choreography much more intertwined this time and very close together. If not breaking charged eye contact were an Olympic sport, they would win gold easily.
The flash. The glamor. The drama. ABBA would be proud! When they round out the final seconds and strike their final pose, Zay and Charlie’s faces are so close, all it would take is a centimeter in either direction…
Zay: Charlie...
Charlie’s eyes flit down to his lips, as if he’s contemplating that very thing…
Rosie, faraway: Charlie!
INT. GARDNER HOME - CHARLIE’S BEDROOM - NIGHT
Alas, not meant to be -- even in dream sequence. Charlie rouses awake when he’s shaken by Rosie, sitting on the bed next to him.
Oh, well. Wouldn’t be the same as doing it for real anyway.
Charlie blinks to adjust back to reality, Rosie releasing a momentous sigh when she sees he’s conscious again. She snaps at him for scaring her, informing him that his fainting spell totally freaked her and Eleanor out. Ambrose is on the phone with their doctor friend right now. He manages to sit up and apologizes for worrying them. It’s probably just… stress.
Rosie: Either way, bad party trick. Mom was so bugged out. You shouldn’t tell her you think it’s stress, or else she’ll probably yank you out of school too and back into Catholic prep.
Charlie: Yeah, speaking of… you really think she’s going to do that to you?
Rosie: … after you passed out, the conversation was basically dropped. If I keep quiet and don’t do anything else to incriminate myself, I think she’ll let it go. [ embittered ] Though sucks that I can’t even text who I want without her knowing every message I send. I doubt she’ll even let me speak to Uri now.
Charlie: Pro-tip? Change his contact name. Mom only goes looking for what she thinks is a problem. If you give him something inconspicuous, she’s never going to know otherwise.
Rosie stares at him, shocked her saltine brother would even think of something like that. I mean, he might be an alcoholic, but still… but it’s good advice all the same. Charlie goes on to explain that he was worried about her, too, and he doesn’t want her to feel like she’s trapped or she has to lash out. You can negotiate with Eleanor, you just have to be clever about it. He doesn’t want her to make the same mistakes that Bridgette did.
Rosie: Yeah, I know… thanks for looking out for me.
Charlie: So… Uri Minkus, huh?
Rosie: Ugh.
Charlie: He’s really that worth sneaking around to text?
Rosie: … I guess you could say… perhaps… maybe… that I have like, the tiniest crush on him. Just a little bit.
Charlie can’t help his smile. He jokes that she should be careful, not because of Eleanor’s concerns, but because if they get married then Farkle is going to become their in-law, and she has no idea what she’s in for if that happens. She groans and nudges Charlie, telling him to shut up, but it’s clear she’s already in better spirits than most of this week. She asks if he’s okay given that all his “stress” is literally making him pass out. Is everything okay with Adams? Charlie admits that he wishes things were easier to navigate than they are.
Charlie: Honestly, I think I’m just naturally gifted at making everything worse. [ with a weak laugh ] Probably should’ve listened to dad when he asked if transferring during senior year was a good idea.
Rosie points out that maybe some of that stress weighing on him is just stuff he creates in his own head. Not to demean it or anything, but like… does everything have to be an anxiety-inducing dilemma? If he wants to go hang out with his friends, from either school, then he should just go do that. He’s allowed to enjoy himself every once and a while and take a break from being the perfect saltine protective older brother. You know, have fun.
Rosie: [ holding up a finger ] Sober fun.
Charlie’s turn to laugh and nudge her. But maybe she has a point. And there might be just the perfect upcoming event where he can relax and have some fun…
INT. ERIC’S APARTMENT - NIGHT
We join Eric and Isadora in the midst of their conversation. Eric reads Valerie’s letter while Isadora watches with her lips pressed together. Once he finishes the letter, he takes a moment to process it.
Eric: Wow. That’s… a lot.
Isadora: What do you think?
Eric: I think that what I think isn’t important at all right now. What do you think? Do you want to get in contact with him?
Isadora thinks about it as she wrings her hands.
Isadora: I’m not sure. But… you aren’t upset?
Eric: Why would I be upset?
Isadora: If I do want to meet him, I’m worried you’ll think that you’re not enough for me or something. I don’t want to hurt you.
Eric: Isadora, that could never happen. I’m not hurt at all, I just want what’s best for you, and a relationship with your father could be something really good.
Isadora: What if it isn’t, though? I don’t want to set myself up for disappointment. Again.
Eric: That’s understandable. You don’t have to make a decision now, though. You have all the time you want to think it over. [ a beat ] If you want, you could write a letter to him yourself. You don’t have to send it, but it can be cathartic to write out everything you’re thinking and feeling about the situation.
Unsure, Isadora pulls a face. Eric reminds her again to just think about it -- no major decisions necessary right now.
INT. AAA - JACK’S OFFICE - DAY
Lucas is meeting with Jack one last time before the dance fundraiser to grab another cash box and go over any last minute details. Jack questions if he’s going to be dressing for the occasion, to which Lucas rolls his eyes but begrudgingly admits that he thinks Riley would be even more upset with him if he didn’t. Though he doesn’t have all the details, Jack assures Lucas that he’s sure Riley isn’t going to be angry for long.
One can only hope. Jack wishes Lucas luck and then he heads out, leaving him to his work. He settles back into it until he lifts his gaze and catches Yancy heading out of the building, checking out for the weekend.
All of Jack’s frustration from his conversation with Evelyn bubbles back up again. He pushes out of his chair, jogging out of his office.
EXT. AAA - DAY
Jack catches Yancy on his way down the steps, telling him that they need to talk. Yancy claims whatever it is can surely wait until Monday, but Jack isn’t having it.
Jack: No, I don’t think your active sabotage of my school can wait another damn second.
Yancy is stunned by his coarse language, effectively halting him long enough to have the confrontation. Well, what then? Jack questions when exactly he planned to let him know about his ongoing anti-campaign against the student government’s scholarship endeavors, or what would drive him and Graham to work to pit the board against them. He knows that they aren’t fond of him, especially after his stunt at the trial, but taking it out on the students? Who does that benefit? What do they gain from that?
Yancy, sharply: Actually, Jackson, you’ve hit the nail on the head. After your little unprofessional display, why wouldn’t we be invested in halting any other schemes you deem a good idea? Particularly when your chosen favorite himself just miraculously managed to become student body president in a school that hates his very existence?
Jack: You have no idea what you’re talking about, and Lucas won that election on his own merit. It had nothing to do with me.
Yancy: It has everything to do with you! Everything does! So long as you are at the helm of this ship, making all the calls, everything ties back to you. And we used to trust you with that power. But all this behavior as of late -- declining lucrative offers, favoring delinquents --
Jack: He is not a delinquent!
Yancy: Or how about cavorting with a fellow employee? [ off his shocked expression ] Oh, come on, Jackson, I’m not naive. Did you and Eric really believe you could flaunt your little flirtation right in front my face and I wouldn’t notice a thing? As if my whole purpose at that school isn’t to keep it from collapsing under your unprofessional whimsy and desires!
This whole time, he’s been observing, watching the operation of AAA from the inside out, trying to determine if Jack remains fit to head the institution. Yancy admits, when Graham first put him up for the job, he was skeptical -- he’d always had great belief in Jack as an educator. He was doubtful that he had really slipped so far… but now he’s seen for himself. There is a certain way things are done, and it seems Jack has forgotten all of his proper perspective in service to that law and order.
Yancy: When I finish my report to the board at the end of the semester, they’ll be the judge of whether or not you deserve to stay where you are. But believe me, if I had it my way, you’d be out of that position and filing for unemployment faster than lightning.
Jack: You can’t do this. You can’t eject me from the role simply because your perspective is too old-fashioned to be flexible. Or empathetic. And unwilling to examine context --
Yancy: Well, we’ll just let the board decide that, won’t we.
Guess we will. Yancy fussily buttons his coat.
Yancy: I would watch yourself if I were you, Jackson. In my opinion, it’s far too late, but we both know how easy it is to tip the scales slightly in your favor. Maybe you’ll salvage this yet. Otherwise, I’d start contemplating alternative paths. Have a good evening.
Yancy stomps down the steps, not waiting for a goodbye. Jack swallows his panic, trying to remain resolute in the face of so much pressure. Scrambling to figure out what to do next...
A groovy disco track bleeds into the soundscape, totally dissonant to Jack’s dread --
INT. DANCE VENUE - NIGHT
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Streetdance” as performed by Disco Street Machine || Instrumental
The ‘70s dance fundraiser is in full swing, and it seems to be doing well! The venue is packed not just with Adams students but other community members, promising at least some greater revenue from the whole ordeal. The scene is set with funky lighting and a dance floor, along with some flower-power type decorations and a fun mirrorball hanging above it all.
It’s mainly cool to see everyone leaning into the theme and dressed in their best approximations of ‘70s garb. We’ve got funky vests, blazers for days, chunky platform boots, a few bohemian chic vibes, you name it. A few establishing shots show us all these looks and more while the assembled crowd grooves to the disco track. Yogi is wandering with his camera, capturing footage for posterity and social media.
Lucas is manning the check-in table, this time keeping control over the money in his own hands. He maintains a cordial enough demeanor as he interacts with potential patrons, and he is giving some semblance of ‘70s as promised in his collared-shirt-under-sweater look. He’s serving like… gothic Fred Jones, which is about as much as you’re gonna get from him.
Asher and Dylan, on the other hand, are representing much better. Asher is repping the funky vest and puffy sleeve shirt vibe, matched well with some maroon bell-bottoms and swooped back hair, while Dylan is truly going disco with a silky vibrant shirt tucked into silver pants, a huge, chunky pair of Elton John tinted glasses the cherry on top of the ensemble. They ask how cash flow is going, and Lucas claims fine, but they’re not out of the woods by a long shot.
Lucas: If things don’t pick up, I’m going to start pickpocketing.
Asher: Yes, that’s exactly what we need. A literal crook for president.
Dylan: Isn’t that like every president?
Anyway, Lucas needs to chill. Or as Dylan puts it, surrender to the boogie. Which is what he and Asher are going to go do right now -- the dance floor beckons them. Asher leads the way, Dylan walking backwards so he can maintain eye contact with Lucas and literally disco groove away from him as encouragement to give in to the funk. Lucas just shakes his head, unimpressed.
When Lucas gets back to work, who should be waiting to purchase a ticket in but Charlie Gardner. He’s dressed for the occasion too, dressed in dark pants and a white blazer… with Riley’s chosen blue shirt underneath. It seems he followed her guidance and went for it after all. Lucas greets him and commends him for turning out, considering all the bad blood between Haverford and AAA right now. Brave of him to show up.
Doesn’t he know it… but he wants to be here. Lucas takes his money and nods for him to go on in, sending him into the fray.
Meanwhile, Zay is parked at one of the tables, not in the best mood considering he’s surrounded by the boogie and can’t participate. Nigel is doing his best to cheer him up, but it’s sort of a fruitless effort. When Zay catches him eyeing Jade, who the techies managed to extract from the loft to at least enjoy the dance, he sighs and tells him to go have fun. He doesn’t have to waste away with him. Nigel argues against that take, but Zay nods him onward, insisting.
So Nigel bounces to his feet, thanking Zay before cutting through the crowd in the direction of Jade. Zay watches him go, bittersweet at being left alone again.
Charlie skirts the edges for a bit before finding companionship in Farkle, who greets him plainly. He’s dressed like Eric Forman, wearing a simple button down and bellbottoms combo with a loose brown corduroy jacket. He and Charlie briefly catch up, commenting on how the turn out is and how great the aesthetic is. But Farkle is still a bit lost in his own head, and Charlie notices. He elbows him lightly.
Charlie: You okay?
Farkle: [ with some of his usual humor ] Chuck, that’s like asking the sky if it’s red. I think you already know the answer.
But he’ll live. Once he figures some things out… it’ll be fine. It has to be. Vagueness aside, Charlie can tell there’s more to it, but he opts to focus on distraction rather than problem-solving. He’s had enough problem-solving for a lifetime this week. He invites Farkle to go dance instead, playfully challenging him to show what disco moves he’s got up his sleeve.
Farkle: Oh, you’re going to regret this -- and not because I’m good.
Charlie laughs, gesturing for him to lead the way onto the dance floor.
Maya jumps up onto the small stage set up with the DJ booth, taking the microphone and briefly thanking everyone for coming out. No applause necessary for putting it together, really… and she waits until the audience feels compelled to applaud. Then she waves them off “humbly” before reminding them of all the ways they can support the Adams senior class while at this benefit -- mainly financially! And by getting down and boogie-oogie-oogying. Peace!
Lucas shakes his head at Maya’s speech, lightly amused, but all of his calm is wiped away when Missy walks through the door. She’s dressed in simple ‘70s, a gorgeous and slightly revealing silk disco mini dress and with her hair blown out like Farah Fawcett. She cheekily compliments him on his get up.
Missy, sarcastic: An ensemble that elaborate must’ve taken ages to throw together. I see you really put an effort in.
Lucas: Maybe. And what’s your excuse?
Missy: Not everything needs to be silly and over the top. In fact, I think the richest things in life are those that go understated. Left unsaid… makes everything a bit more exciting, anticipating whatever more there might be to explore. [ a beat ] Same goes for fashion.
Lucas: … so are you paying, or what?
Missy: As I understand it, Adams seniors get in free. But since I can afford it…
She reaches into her small satin purse, pulling out a wad of cash. She siphons off about half of it -- way more than a ticket would cost -- and drops it into the cash box for him. He eyes it suspiciously, then flits his glare towards her.
Missy: I thought about our little chat. And you’re right, maybe there needs to be something in it for me -- which in this case is a victory at showdown. We’re embarrassing enough right now as it is. At least with the funding, we’ll look good when we crash and burn. And as for the rest…
She folds up the remaining bills in her hand and holds them out for him, gesture subtle but unmistakable. Lucas stares at the money, then glances around them nervously to make sure no one else is looking.
Lucas: What the hell are you doing?
Missy: Come on, Lucas. Don’t be noble. We know how things are between us. I’m just trying to help. And it stays discreet. Think of it as… a bonus, for all the hard work you’re doing for the A class. [ quieter ] I heard you in the booth. You don’t ask for help. Well, sometimes, you don’t have to beg. You can just take… whatever you want.
She raises her eyebrows, subtly challenging him to take it. Lucas hesitates, holding his breath… it feels like a test, he knows it is… but he’s already taken plenty from her without asking. What’s a little more…
Missy: Davis isn’t going to pay for itself, is it?
No. No it isn’t. She’s right, and he knows his chances of reeling a scholarship are slim to none. Does he really want all of this stress for applications to be for nothing?
Reluctantly, Lucas takes the money from her and slips it into his back pocket. Missy smiles, genuinely pleased, though why it’s hard to say. But it’s clear, now more than ever, that whatever little arrangement they’ve got going on here is a pattern now. It’s not just going to flutter away on its own, and the consequences that might come of it remain a mystery.
Missy: Groovy. Enjoy the dance, Lucas.
Lucas doesn’t respond, using the cash box as an excuse not to look at her. But based on flipping through the amount of money she handed over for the fundraiser, they’re way closer to their goal than before. And that has to make it all worth it, right?
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “September” as performed by Earth, Wind, & Fire || Instrumental
One of the best songs of the decade comes on next, earning an enthusiastic cheer from the crowd. Riley weaves her way through the throng and rushes up to the entrance to find Lucas, Nate in tow. She’s dressed in a shimmery lavender-mauve jumpsuit, a complimentary hair scarf tying together the groovy look. She pushes Nate in front of her.
Riley: Nate here is taking over table duty.
Nate: You know how I love dem bills, my brother.
Riley: So that you can come dance with me.
Lucas cringes, weakly putting up a fight. Oh, no, no, no… but Riley’s already got her hands on him, and her smile is so damn cute, it would be impossible to refuse her. So he lets her drag him out into the crowd.
Once they’re actually on the dance floor, Riley beams at him and pulls him closer, wrapping her arms around his shoulders. Lucas does his best to be a good sport and play along, especially since he’s already in trouble, placing his hands on her hips and casually swaying to the beat.
Lucas: So… does this mean I’m off the hook for the Brandon thing, or…
Riley: Hm… so as long you’re dancing with me and you look so cute in that sweater, I suppose you can be forgiven.
Better than nothing, though Lucas still clearly feels guilty about disappointing her. Just one of many ways he feels like he’s letting her down… but for now she’s happy, so he’ll just focus on touching her waist and how hot she looks in her jumpsuit.
Across the dance floor, Dylan and Asher are in conversation with Jeff and Yindra, Dylan with his arm draped casually around Asher’s shoulders and bouncing to the beat. They’re discussing the everchanging stakes of their showdown routine -- at this point Yindra claims they should just scrap it all and start over, they’ve got equally as bad a shot with the shoddy routine they have now. But Asher claims that would be a disaster, and they should only cross that bridge if they absolutely must.
Dylan spots something that seems to capture his attention, his eyes widening in excitement. He pinches Asher’s ribs and leans closer, Asher tilting his head to listen to his murmur.
Dylan: Shakespeare in Love, straight ahead.
Asher squints through the dancing crowd and finds what he’s talking about -- Nigel and Jade. He’s actually managed to pull her onto the dance floor, engaging in loose and easy grooving together. She’s laughing, waving off how bad a dancer she is, but he holds one of her hands and assures her she’s good.
Totally radical. Asher and Dylan exchange knowing looks, unable to hold back a grin.
Zay is less enthused, mainly because of his current view -- Charlie, dancing with Farkle of all people to one of the greatest songs there is. Not that there’s anything to be concerned about, really, since they’re clearly just goofing around with each other and Farkle is as promised quite an embarrassing disco dancer. But he’s up and moving, free, having fun, making Charlie laugh -- with Charlie looking disgustingly attractive in his expertly chosen shirt -- and it kind of feels like a perfect vignette of what’s locked away from him.
Everything Zay wants, desperately misses, but can’t have.
His brooding is interrupted when Isadora plops down into the chair across from him, giving him a nod in greeting. He asks why she’s not out there grooving on the dance floor, and she sagely says she’s not interested in getting up to boogie so… publicly. She’s amazed Riley got Lucas out there, but that’s only because of her unique Riley charms. It’s torture in her eyes.
Zay: Speak for yourself, but you’re entitled to your whack opinion.
Isadora: I know, I know. This is killing you. And I respect that. Just not for me. [ a beat ] Maybe it’ll give you some peace to know that you being benched is an undeniable tragedy for all of us.
Zay: The considerate part of me says no, but the egotistical side does love it, thank you.
Isadora: You’re welcome. [ with a sigh ] Now there’s talk of changing the routine if we can’t figure out how to fill your vacancy. Not that I don’t think we could pull it off, but it would take all hands on deck and everyone on board, and I don’t see that happening unless there’s no other alternative. Right now, if we could just find someone to fill your spot -- never as strongly, of course --
Zay: Again, my ego thanks you. You’re not going to take the spot?
Isadora: Uh… I mean, I don’t know. A couple of people suggested it, but look, we know I’m no you. I don’t learn as quickly, and I’ve got enough of a track record with performance mishaps on my own. I mean, what if I do it but I completely freeze the moment we have to go out there? My mom’s parting gift to me was giving me the one thing she never had -- stage fright. Doesn’t that seem too risky to throw in there when the stakes are higher than ever?
Zay: Man, I don’t know. I get what you’re saying, but all I know is that I would kill to be able to perform right now. And if you’re debating it at all, then to me, that means you want to -- and if I had the ability to do it, I wouldn’t waste it for a second on what ifs.
Very insightful, Zay. Isadora contemplates this… then she points out to Zay that just because he’s off his feet doesn’t mean he has to fade into oblivion. He’s got to take the time to heal, but that doesn’t mean he can’t be involved in the class or productions. He just has to find new ways to involve himself rather than what he’s used to.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Y.M.C.A.” as performed by Village People || Instrumental
Another classic! In an instant, Riley appears at their table, teeming with enthusiasm and reaching for Zay’s hands. She insists that he get up dance with her -- to which he reminds her that he’s booted -- but she points out that anyone can do the Y.M.C.A. It’s just shouting and arms! So he relents, allowing her to help him to his feet, but his grin betrays his aloof demeanor.
Farkle slides over moments later, telling Isadora that she better get up and join them too. If Zay can do it, she has no excuse. She rolls her eyes, but she really can’t argue with him on that.
So the dance wraps up with a flourish, the full class laughing, sing-shouting and goofing off together to the party favorite that literally anyone can do. Nigel and Riley each support Zay on either side, and he looks about as joyful as he has in weeks. Asher and Dylan prevent Lucas from escaping, keeping him on the dance floor and trapping him in the Y.M.C.A groove too. Charlie dances with Haley and Clarissa, who take turns twirling under his arms.
Yogi and Dave make their way through it all, capturing all the joy of a successful fundraiser on camera so they’ll never forget it.
INT. DANCE VENUE - LATER - NIGHT
The party has wrapped up, only the A class hanging around to clean up. Well, the A class and Charlie, who insisted it was no problem to stay back and assist in tidying. He’s working with Nigel and Yindra at stacking chairs, the latter of which comments playfully that he really is too helpful for his own good.
Yindra: Such a good little Christian, truly. It’s like God injected his compassion mission into your cute white boy veins.
Charlie: Well… not that good, admittedly. [ a beat ] I think if he was going to make his prototype golden child, he would’ve skipped the part where he made me gay.
Oop. Wow, a casual coming out -- and with a little humor, too! Charlie is getting better at this. Yindra raises her eyebrows at him, assessing for a moment whether or not he might be joking… and then she breaks into a wide grin, wrapping an arm around his shoulders.
Yindra: Oh, Charlie, Charlie, Charlie… I always knew I liked you. And I should’ve known, considering that awful Les Mis kiss still haunts my nightmares.
She asks how long he’s been out, or at least telling people, and Nigel slides in to proudly note that he told him before Yindra. She rolls her eyes. Charlie admits it’s slow-going and hasn’t been easy, especially with the community outside of AAA, but it feels good every time he does it. Hopefully the rest of his world will turn out tolerant too.
Yindra invites him to her church that Sunday for a change of pace. She’s performing a solo in the choir, so it’ll be guaranteed entertaining, and it might be good for him to see an actually accepting church environment for a change.
Nigel: She just wants to force you to see her ‘70s performance before she shares it with the class on Monday. The more people she can force to be her audience, the better.
Yindra: Hey, now, I don’t care for your sass, Chey Chey.
Either way, her church runs later than his, so it shouldn’t conflict. And Nigel will be there too -- she’s bribing him with brunch -- so it’ll be like a fun little outing. Charlie just seems happy to be connecting with his peers again, so he happily agrees.
Nate, pre-lap: 70… 80… 90…
INT. CHUBBIES - NIGHT
Lucas, Maya, Riley, Dylan, Asher, Isadora, and Farkle are convened in and around the back corner booth, watching nervously as Nate counts the final income from the dance fundraiser. All of them are holding their breath… Maya is pacing like a wildcat, ready to pounce and tear him to shreds if the number is too low.
Isadora: Jesus, Nate, can’t you count any faster?
Nate: No, I don’t cut corners when it comes to money. Now shut up, or I’ll have to start over.
Farkle, exhausted: Hush, Isa. Don’t make him start over.
Silence settles over them again… and Nate finishes counting the bills from the cashbox. He lifts up a finger to halt them from asking, writing the number down and then pulling up the calculator app on his phone. After combining the total from this with the car wash haul…
Nate: We did it. Crazy sons of bitches, we did it!
They officially made the money to pay for the damages and fund their showdown needs. Victory! All of them cheer, hugging each other and clapping enthusiastically. Riley wraps her arms around Lucas and kisses his cheek, while he’s looking pretty relieved.
Nate: I gotta say though, the numbers seem kind of skewed based on the actual attendance we had. Someone must’ve made a huge donation. [ to Lucas ] Did you notice anyone drop some major cash?
Oh, interesting… Lucas pauses, then breezes past the question. He claims it doesn’t matter who donated what -- they’re in the clear, and now they can focus on what matters. It’s time to kick Haverford’s pretentious privileged ass at showdown.
Hear, hear! The group cheers again, exchanging high-fives and reveling in their hard-earned success.
INT. ERIC’S APARTMENT - NIGHT
Isadora arrives home, shedding her jacket and shoes at the door. She’s relaxed, and has a relieved smile on her face. From where he sits on the sofa, Eric looks over to her.
Isadora: We did it! We raised all the money we need.
Eric: Oh, amazing! Well done, I’m so proud of you all.
Isadora sits down next to him and exhales. It’s been a long day.
Isadora: I’ve been thinking about it a lot and I’ve decided to write a letter to Zachary.
Eric: Tha --
Isadora, interrupting: I don’t know whether I’ll send it or not, but I do think it’ll help just to get my thoughts out there.
Eric nods his agreement, and reminds her that he’ll always be there for her. Just as she starts to ask for help on what to include in the correspondence, there’s a knock at the door. Eric goes to answer it, pleasantly surprised to find Jack waiting on the other side. Although he’s happy to see him, Jack seems stressed, so Isadora gets the hint that she should probably give them some space. She wishes Jack a good night and retreats to her room, leaving them alone.
Eric: Did you hear that they made the money to cover the auditorium damages? I’m honestly impressed, but I guess we should never doubt the A class.
Jack: Yeah… yeah, I did. From Lucas. It’s great.
Eric: … okay, what’s going on. You’ve got your thin voice going, how you get when something is wrong.
Jack doesn’t even bother to ask what that means -- Eric knows him well, it’s hardly a surprise at this point. He releases a strained sigh and explains what happened with Yancy, both about him sabotaging the scholarship fund from within the board and then the confrontation they had on the steps. Eric listens raptly, absorbing some of his dread with every word.
Eric: That sick… I always knew there was something off about him. He’s a corporate sellout through and through -- has been since he joined the board. And he has the gall to lecture you… we’ll get him for this, Jack. We just have to strategize --
Jack: No. No, we can’t do anything. Not right now. Not with so many things on the line.
Jack mentions the other piece of Yancy’s threat -- that he might be put on probation for real and potentially let go. Eric scoffs at this, disbelieving. Jack is well-known in the community… no way he’d get ousted. It’s an empty threat.
Eric: What’ll probably happen is that if anything, they put you off contract, and the position would reopen for applicants. So all you’d have to do is apply again, and Evelyn would hand it back to you without question. Yancy is just reaching, he can’t --
Jack: But Evelyn isn’t the only vote that matters, Eric. If they can flip a decision on something like the scholarships… that affects the students… and I don’t think he’s bluffing. I mean, he brought up Lucas, he mentioned… he mentioned you and me…
Eric shrinks a bit at this. It’s uncomfortable that someone is using their relationship as leverage, implying it’s a bad thing, but he’s also nervous about the way Jack is taking it. He knows how much he cares about AAA. He’d do anything to keep it afloat, to do what’s right for the school.
Eric: So… [ with a deep breath ] What do you want to do?
Jack, softly: Right now… I just think we need to… we need to step back. Put things on hold until the dust settles. My examination period should be over soon, and when this is all sorted, then… then maybe we can…
But for now, they can’t. There’s too much at stake… things both of them care about more than themselves. Although Eric is reluctant, he does his best to keep his emotions in check and nods along. He places a hand on Jack’s shoulder, letting it rest there for a moment. Stroking with his thumb, soaking in the touch for all it’s worth. Who knows when he’ll comfortably get to do it again.
Eric: Whatever you need, Jack. I understand. [ with difficulty ] I’m with you.
Jack nods, grateful. More grateful than he’ll ever know. He holds his gaze for a long moment, then leans forward and presses his lips softly to the corner of his mouth. So close, yet so far… Eric closes his eyes, trying his best not to crack.
Jack pulls back, swallowing hard. He clears his throat and nods, back to a fragile shell of professionalism.
Jack: I’ll see you at school.
Eric returns the nod, but he can’t meet his eyes. Jack hesitates for a moment longer, wishing it wasn’t this way, wishing he could stay… then steps back into the hall, shutting the door behind him.
Like he was never there.
INT. YINDRA’S CHURCH - DAY
Charlie and Nigel are in one of the pews amidst the usual congregation of Yindra’s church, waiting for the choir following the service to begin. Charlie seems excited but nervous, liking the high spirits and jovial energy but worried he’s an imposter just like he is everywhere else. He leans over to Nigel.
Charlie: I stick out like a sore thumb, don’t I?
Nigel: Mm, yeah. But it’s okay, [ patting his arm ] you can’t help that you’re skim milk.
Thank you for that, Nigel. Charlie opens his mouth to respond, but nothing comes out, so it’s a relief when Yindra steps down front and center in her church choir robes to address the congregation. She cheerfully greets them and explains that she got to choose the song for this week, which she used to also fulfill the requirement for her art school lesson. Two birds, one stone, am I right?
Either way, she wants to dedicate the heart of this performance to her peers at school and in attendance this afternoon. She knows they’re all going through stuff, and even though it feels like the end of the world right now, it’ll all be water under the bridge one day. All they can do is take it day by day, and by the grace of God, everything will end up the way it’s meant to be.
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Bridge Over Troubled Water” as performed by Glee Cast || Performed by Yindra Amino
If anyone could deliver soulful, impressive vocals to rival and honor Mercedes Jones (for those of us who did watch Glee, unlike the Havies), it would be Yindra Amino. And deliver she does, both in the church and on the atrium steps at AAA where she splits this performance. The rest of her choir backing her up gospel style really does add a certain something something, but the true emphasis of the number is the meaning.
Your time has come to shine All your dreams are on their way See how they shine, oh, if you need a friend I'm sailing right behind
When she makes it to the latter half and the gospel kicks off clapping to the beat, the entire congregation leaps to their feet and eagerly joins in. Charlie and Nigel are right there with them -- as is the A class in the atrium intercut of the performance.
Yindra brings it home with a spectacular vocal run, and you have to wonder if she really could make it out there in L.A. on her vocal chops alone. The church erupts into gleeful applause as she wraps up and takes a bow with the choir, beaming bright.
Charlie mirrors her smile, enthusiastically clapping along. Experiencing for an instant what it’s like to feel comfortable in church -- allowed to just be himself.
INT. CHUBBIES - DAY
Lucas is anxiously sitting opposite Riley in the usual booth, watching as she carefully reads over his personal essays. She’s doing her best to maintain a professional and neutral expression while she goes, but it’s impossible to hold back the slightest smile on her lips as she reaches the conclusion. When she lifts her gaze to meet his, but purposefully builds suspense by not saying anything, he cracks.
Lucas: Well? They’re terrible, aren’t they? You can just say it if they are.
Riley: … [ breaking into a grin ] They’re great, Lucas. Brilliant, honestly. Not that I ever had any doubt you could pull it off.
What a relief. Lucas exhales a sigh, thanking her for taking the time to read them. Then he continues, softly apologizing for not telling her about what happened with Brandon. Even though he had good intentions, he knows it doesn’t matter. And if he wanted so much not for her to know, then obviously it was never a good idea to begin with.
Riley: You know it’s fine for you to mess up. I just don’t get why you didn’t tell me.
Lucas: [ after a beat ] I guess I didn’t… it’s like the stupid personal essays. I know that… I’m not a shining example of a good person. I don’t think that’s exactly a secret.
Riley: I don’t think that.
Lucas: I know. I know you don’t, and I think that’s why I didn’t want you to know. Because it’s like every thing I do that shows you that, the more you realize that I’m… less than ideal, then…
Riley tilts her head, giving him a sympathetic look. Then she gets up and comes to join him on his side of the booth, sliding in next to him and leaning forward a bit so he’ll meet her gaze.
Riley: I told you that I wanted a relationship with you, and I meant it. And that’s all of you -- everything, the good and the bad. Even if you make a mistake, or I get disappointed, it doesn’t change that. We’ll find a way to work it out. I want you.
Her way with words makes everything sound so easy, so simple… and maybe it is. Maybe it can be just as simple as wanting each other, loving each other, and making it work. Lucas absorbs the sentiment, smiling shyly and thanking her again.
Hard part out of the way, Riley asks him how he managed to break his writer’s block and write those killer essays. What was his secret? Lucas hums, thinking about it.
Lucas: It was kind of what you said. You know, changing my perspective. When I was trying to write it from my lens, it was… well, you know. But then I just tried to think… what would Riley say? If someone asked you about me. And when I thought about it like that, I don’t know… suddenly, it was easy.
Riley chews her lip, smile blossoming on her face. She pulls him into a gentle kiss, one that he returns before swiftly stealing another one. She nudges her forehead against his, fondness shining in her eyes as she looks at him.
It’s no mystery how thinking like her made for some unbeatable work.
Billy, pre-lap: I knew it. I knew he wasn’t loyal.
INT. HAVERFORD PREP - SENIOR LOUNGE - DAY
Dweezil’s phone is sitting on the tabletop, open to the Adams social media page. Displayed are a handful of photos Yogi took during the ‘70s dance… including one clearly featuring Charlie, dancing with Haley and Clarissa. Although it looks like he’s having a swell time, Billy and Dweezil don’t seem happy for their classmate at all.
Dweezil: He’s never really jumped ship. We know he’s always hanging out with Riley anyway. This is just definitive proof.
Billy: Showdown is in a week. If he’s still this comfortable with his old chums, who knows how much shit he’s telling them.
Dweezil: And what if he finds out about the plan? No way he’s going to let us do it.
Billy: I say we take care of this now. Before it interferes with our performance.
Dweezil: He might blow everything.
Billy: Brandon. You have to have an opinion on this shit.
Opposite them and seated at the table, Brandon is examining the photograph for himself. He’s unperturbed as usual, thoughtful and contemplative. He doesn’t comment until Billy and Dweezil basically demand input from him, at which point he offers a calm smile.
Brandon: It’s nice to see him enjoying himself, isn’t it? I like Charles. He’s a nice kid. [ a beat, then suavely ] And a coward.
Brandon gingerly places Dweezil’s phone back on the desk, reclining back in his chair.
Brandon: I’m not worried about him.
Billy: Man, you’re kidding --
Dweezil: And what if he decides to --
Brandon: Don’t you get it? He’s not going to do anything. If there’s one thing you can count on with Charles, it’s that he’s spineless. He’s not feeding them information, and even if he does take offense to something we do, he isn’t going to do shit. Gardner is soft, and he’s the least of our worries. But in a week it’s not even going to matter. Especially not when we’ve got this.
Brandon retrieves the flash drive from his blazer pocket, placing it on the table between them. Billy and Dweezil eye it with interest -- they all clearly know what it contains.
Brandon: Once we crack into this, it’s over. We’re going to crush Adams like we do every year -- whether Charles helps or not.
INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY
Ah, to be back in the warm embrace of the auditorium -- even if it’s still a bit banged up. It’ll take a little while longer to get the auditorium back in tip-top shape, but the A class can at least come home to roost in it again, which is where they gather for the kick off the next week.
All of them give a round of applause to Harley for his assistance in repairing their mistakes, and hope that he enjoyed the performances of the last few days. He assures them he did, though as he understands it, the week isn’t quite over yet. He steps back and allows Jade to take front and center.
She thanks all of them for being patient with her while she finished up her portfolio materials, and at this point she only has one more request. Behind her, Dave and Dylan roll out the racks with her ‘70s portfolio costumes, and she explains that she needs models to pose for the photographs she’s going to include in her application of all her hard work. Now hm… where on Earth is she going to find suitable, available models for free who she just happened to know all the measurements of and would fit perfectly into these custom costumes…
Song Cue ♫ ♪ “Shake Your Booty” as performed by Forever In Your Mind || Performed by AAA Seniors
Riley beams, claiming she thinks she knows where they could find a few volunteers. The A class launches to their feet, rushing the stage to see what Jade has in store.
INT. AAA - BOYS DRESSING ROOM - DAY
The boys kick off this energetic, bopping closing number, changing into their Jade ‘70s ensembles and grooving in the dressing room. Sliding through the wall --
INT. AAA - GIRLS DRESSING ROOM - DAY
The girls are doing the same, fluffing their hair and doing each other’s make up as they sing into the mirrors. Once they’re all set, Yindra leads the way out into the dressing room hall…
INT. AAA - DRESSING ROOM HALL - DAY
Where they meet up with the boys, strutting in their fierce, authentically ‘70s looks. They make a mad dash for the auditorium --
INT. AAA - AUDITORIUM - DAY
And reclaim their stage, breaking into disco grooves as they toss around solo lines and show off their outfits. Jade stands with Yogi and helps him direct the costume shoot, both of them dressed up as well with Jade sporting the stereotypical but Jade-infused bohemian flower power girl look with a flowy white dress with puffy sleeves and a leather headband laced with wildflowers.
On the bridge, we get a montage of all of the A class posing in their outfits as they dance to get their pictures taken. This highlights not only how much we love this silly crop of seniors, but also how fantastic and individualized Jade’s costumes truly are. Paired with the earnest and jubilant performance, it’s a truly lovable showing.
Then they bring it on home with a disco line dance, all breaking into the same groovy choreography and all in their ‘70s garb. Zay watches from the audience with Lucas and the faculty, for once seemingly not in despair over being benched and still getting a custom outfit of his own. Dylan and Asher are front and center, and they pull Jade into it on the last few lines, so she also gets her boogie in before the day is done.
If one thing is clear, it’s that disco is far from dead, thank you very much! And while the A class has a lot on their plates -- and insurmountable stakes ahead -- it’s hard not to feel hopeful when they’ve got each other.
Whether that’s enough, well, soon we’ll find out.
END OF EPISODE.
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How to Make Friends and Influence Hobbits (Part 3)
It’s my birthday! To celebrate, I’m posting another segment from the story I published a few months ago, in which Feanor uses a tea cozy of doom and ends up in the Shire.
. . .
“So,” Belladonna said cheerfully as she finished pouring the tea. “Where do we start?”
Her collection of maps was spread over the kitchen table, with particular emphasis to those that showed the coast, as that was their best guess for where Feanor’s son was.
“I do not know,” Feanor confessed. He didn’t sound like he said those words often. “I’ve never even laid eyes on this coast.”
“I am not even truly convinced that he walks these shores,” Gandalf said doubtfully. “To speak truth, until you arrived and said otherwise, I assumed that he had long ago gone to Mandos’s Halls.”
“No,” Feanor said grimly. “He was spared that, at least.”
Gandalf’s eyebrows came together rather alarmingly in a manner that normally preceded a rebuke, which Belladonna rather doubted their other guest would take kindly. She intervened hastily. “Bungo? What do you think?”
“Oh, dear,” he said helplessly. “Well, I’m rather out of my depth here, you know, but this is rather a search party, as you said, and I can’t help thinking that when your young cousin went missing, we ended up finding her when her friend - Daisy, was it? - when her friend mentioned how much she’d wanted to climb that old tree down by the bridge, and sure enough, there she was at the very top. I don’t suppose there’s anyone else we could ask?”
“There are few indeed who look kindly on my house now. I doubt he has any he feels he may confide in on these shores,” Feanor said heavily.
“There may yet be one,” Gandalf said slowly. “I know Elrond searched for him for many years. He might, at the very least, have some information on where we need not bother to look.”
“Elrond?” Feanor looked startled.
“I suppose he was rather after your time. Idril’s grandson might be a more useful description - “
“I know perfectly well who he is, thank you,” Feanor interrupted. “Mandos liked to keep me updated on the damage brought about by my Oath. Fingon spoke better of the incident, but I was unsure how much of that was his rather singular optimism.”
Gandalf’s mouth twitched. “In this case, at least, I believe it was not misplaced. Elrond is also rather singular, in his case for his attachment to your eldest sons. I suspect he will be willing to help us, or at least to make the attempt.”
“It’s settled then,” Belladonna said brightly. “Elrond’s it is! Every quest ought to begin at Rivendell, I think, it’s such a nice destination, so that’s all right and proper. And you’ll finally get to meet him, Bungo!”
Bungo nodded firmly. “I’d best get started on the provisions, then. We won’t want to get hungry on our way.”
Gandalf shook his head fondly. “Hobbits.”
His eyes sharpened slightly when Feanor volunteered to help pack said provisions, though Belladonna couldn’t imagine why. Feanor had never been anything but a courteous houseguest, and she didn’t know why anyone wouldn’t want to help pack the provisions, anyway. It was the best way to get a say in what got packed.
It was a good thing Feanor volunteered too, or else she might have forgotten to return his tea cozy, and it was such a lovely thing that it would have been a terrible shame.
. . .
The Last Homely House was always open to any friendly visitors, but Elrond had to admit that he hadn’t been anticipating these.
He’d led them in to a private room near the center of the house where they were unlikely to be disturbed and where his guests could recover from their travels in comfort. It seemed the best thing to do, given that he could only guess what catastrophic events could have led to this unexpected party forming.
He hadn’t been precisely expecting Mithrandir, but given the Grey Pilgrim’s wandering ways, he never precisely expected him, which he meant he always expected him in a more general way. The two hobbits, while certainly not anticipated, were not outside the realm of possibility; he had met Mistress Belladonna before, and while she had expressed her intention to leave her adventuring ways behind when she last left Rivendell, she would not be the first to leave that intention behind. Master Bungo’s addition to her adventures was sensible when viewed in a certain light, and Elrond was delighted to meet him.
It was the inclusion of Feanor in the party that made Elrond wonder if Dagor Dagorath was upon them rather earlier than expected.
The light of the Trees blazed from the ancient elf’s eyes more strongly than Elrond had ever seen. Power and heat radiated off him, and while he had so far been nothing but courteous, there was a tension between him and Mithrandir that suggested his time amongst the dead had not softened him toward the Valar and their servants. If the Valar had released him anyway . . .
Elrond exercised patience with more difficulty than he’d had for years as he let his guests get settled into their chairs and partake of refreshments before finally turning to Gandalf and asking, “Is the end of days upon us then?”
Bungo choked on his cake and had to be vigorously pounded on his back by Belladonna. “End of days? I thought we were a search party!”
“Has my presence becomes such an ill omen as all that?” Feanor asked with dark humor sparking in his eyes.
Mithrandir sighed. “It has been suggested by some that you would be released to fight in the final battle.”
“Really? Well, I wish someone had told me about it. I could have been preparing . . . Regardless, I have not been released, so you need not fear that battle just yet.”
“I found him in the woods,” Belladonna piped up, with one last concerned look at Bungo. “And then I took him home, of course, because he was dreadfully lost, and luckily Bungo didn’t mind, so he stayed with us for a bit until Gandalf showed up and said he’d escaped from somewhere, though I still don’t quite understand all of that bit.”
Feanor had escaped from the Halls of Mandos. Of course he had.
“The Valar had nothing to do with it,” Mithrandir confirmed, his voice growing dry. “The exact sequence of events is as of yet unknown to me, but I do know that the Valar are for once as confounded as the rest of us.”
“I weep for them,” Feanor said with even greater dryness. “Though if they paid even a modicum of attention to what their prisoners were getting up to, they would know perfectly well what I was up to - and I wouldn’t have had to be getting up to it, as they would not have left my sons to go slowly mad in solitary confinement.”
Maedhros. He had not been well even when Elrond had last seen him. If things were truly so bad -
Mithrandir sighed. “The ways of the Valar are not always easily understood - “
Feanor’s eyes gained extra heat. Elrond began to grow concerned at just how far this would escalate.
Belladonna coughed a little pointedly. Elrond stepped gratefully into the momentary chagrined pause. “And how may I help?” He turned to Feanor. “If you need a place to stay as you become accustomed to the world as it is now, you are of course welcome here. Imladris is open to all.” It would cause some difficulty, no doubt, but Elrond had never turned someone who had no ill intent away before, and he didn’t mean to start now.
Feanor actually looked a little rueful.. “I would ask your forgiveness for earlier. I did not come here to start an argument but to ask a favor, though a different one than you have offered, and I fear I’ve made a terrible start to it.”
“A favor?” Several possibilities warred in his mind.
“I was given to understand that you once searched for the whereabouts for my son. If you can give me any information as to his whereabouts, I would be more grateful than I can express.”
Maglor. Centuries of panic at being asked on that topic froze his mind temporarily before sense returned. He had known this was a possibility, and while Mithrandir’s presence made him reluctant to speak of it, if even Feanor considered it safe to do so, surely it was. Still - “It has been many years since I searched these shores for him,” he said carefully. “Events eventually forced me to cease. Still, if there is any aid I can give, I shall do my best. Your interest in this is, of course, entirely understandable, but may I ask how your companions became involved in this search?”
“He was our guest,” Belladonna said cheerily. “Of course we had to help.”
“Only right,” Bungo agreed with a nod.
Mithrandir sighed. “And I came along to make sure this quest ended rather more peacefully than the last one.”
“Ah.” Elrond’s mind raced. There was only one thing to do, of course, but after so long, it went against all his instincts. And how would Mithrandir react . . . ?
Hurried footsteps echoed down the hallway outside the door, and Elrond tensed. It was either someone with more strange news, which he was not at all sure he could cope with today, or it was -
“Ada?”
The beautiful voice, high with incredulity, came from the arch of the door. The choice had been taken out of his hands.
Maglor stood in the entryway, eyes locked on the blazing figure in the middle of their party, mingled terror and hope upon his face.
“I thought - I was sure I felt your mind, but how - “ the bard said, his voice for once failing him.
Feanor just shook his head, his own eyes suspiciously full.
“Many long years since you searched for him on these shores,” Mithrandir said witheringly. “Events forced you too cease.”
Elrond gave in with grace. “Many centuries,” he said serenely. “These days I generally search for him in the gardens or the Hall of Fire. And the event of finding him did rather force me to cease or else act rather pointlessly.”
Mirthrandir’s expression suggested Elrond would be hearing about this at length later, but Elrond was far more concerned with the other scene progressing at the moment.
“I’m here,” Feanor said hoarsely as he rose from his chair. “I’m here, Makalaure. I came back for you.”
“But you can’t have,” Maglor breathed. “You can’t - you can’t be real - “ He looked appealingly to Elrond.
“He’s here,” Elrond assured him. “This is real.”
Maglor’s next breath came out as a sob. “I’m sorry,” he said pleadingly. “So sorry, Ada. I failed you.”
“No,” Feanor said firmly, stepping forward, but Maglor seemed not to hear. He was scrambling at the pouch at his waist that until now he’d always kept closed.
“I couldn’t fulfill your Oath, but I could - I managed this much at least, Ada - “
The light that spilled from the pouch was blinding.
“He kept it?” the wizard said in stunned amazement.
Belladonna craned her neck. “What’s it?”
“It’s pretty whatever it is,” Bungo said politely, and Elrond nearly choked.
He had known Maglor had kept it, safely insulated so that it would not burn. Its burn was not so keen now as it once was, though Maglor and Elrond’s views rather differed on what that meant.
Maglor reached in now barehanded and offered it to his father, ignoring whatever pain that remained. Elrond was unable to restrain a cry. The pain might have lessened, but he knew it still remained. He could see it in how the gem trembled in Maglor’s hand.
Feanor took it, and Elrond could have cursed him, but all that ill will was abruptly tossed away.
Rather literally. Feanor took the gem, but then flung it to the ground without even looking at it, instead embracing his son.
“You’re here,” he said. “I found you. That’s treasure enough.”
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Berlinale Film Festival 2021, Industry Event, Day 3
I was hoping to start Day Three off with another shot of highly-caffeinated filmmaking, so I honed in on another genre picture in the Berlinale Special section: Soi Cheang’s LIMBO. Like many other movies before it, LIMBO pairs a veteran cop (Gordon Lam, in good form) with an all-star rookie (Mason Lee) and puts them on the hunt of a serial killer. What makes LIMBO stand out from the rest is that it is shot in beautifully oily, textured black and white.
You can see from the one frame above that the movie is putting in some serious effort on the art design. Every time the cops leave the station, chances are they’re headed someplace that will put them knee deep in garbage. And thanks to the photography and attention to detail, you can practically smell the rotting refuse.
Unfortunately, the story doesn’t quite live up to the imagery. The script, written by Au Kin-Yee (whose previous work includes some co-writing credits on a few Johnnie To films), tries to put a socially conscious spin on the serial killer by making the victims marginalized, societal outcasts. But is this anything new? Aren’t the marginalized always the most vulnerable people? Isn’t an immigrant, junkie or prostitute always on a killer’s most wanted list? What makes it even less compelling is that there’s hardly an interesting motive to the madness. Unlike other grimy, big-city serial killer movies that feint toward social relevance (SEVEN), there’s no clever mastermind behind the killings. In fact, there’s any number of other cases that could have brought a pair of cops into these squalid environments and face-to-face with the city’s forgotten people. And maybe the plight of these people wouldn’t have felt so shoehorned into the story.
More interesting is the movie’s recurring theme of lost limbs. Yes, the title “Limbo” is a bit of wordplay, as many people in the movie are losing one appendage or another — sometimes by accident, sometimes through the use of a rusty, blunt tool. It’s a nice gory little motif that the movie makes hay out of, but again, it doesn’t go anywhere. As it turns out, this amputation fetish is the only interesting character detail that the movie bothers to give the killer. Otherwise, all we have is a standard, anonymous, non-speaking brute out of an 80s slasher movie. Perhaps most frustrating of all is that the film makes a step toward giving the killer a bit of sympathy early on, only to follow it up with some unnecessarily degrading action that stomps out that angle completely. What’s more interesting: watching police chasing after a faceless, voiceless, unsympathetic killer, or watching police being outwitted by a smart murderer who’s revealed to have some sort of messed up moral compass in place?
I wouldn’t go so far as to say LIMBO is a bad movie, just a frustrating one. There are some good intentions in here, and the movie looks fantastic, but if they’d put a bit more effort into creating a killer worthy of all the fuss, we’d be looking at a great addition to the genre. Oh, and the extremely hackneyed ending, which tries to pass itself off as tragic, doesn’t win it any points, either.
The second film of the day brings us back to the Competition section, and it was an extremely pleasant surprise. In fact, it was one of the best surprises of this year’s Berlinale (so far). With his second feature-length film, WHAT DO WE SEE WHEN WE LOOK AT THE SKY?, Georgian writer/director/editor Alexandre Koberidze establishes himself as an auteur with a strong and poetic vision for cinema.
Early on, I couldn’t help but flash on AMÉLIE. The two films have a few things in common: a narrator who gives the proceedings a fairy tale aspect, inanimate objects imbued with special powers, a will-they/won’t-they love story that starts on a chance encounter, a story that is as much focused on a neighborhood community as it is the two central characters… and yet WHAT DO WE SEE is a much different film. For starters, it’s far less manic. This is a very leisurely-paced film. One that lingers on people in cafés and sidewalk kiosks. One that likes to make digressions, like getting into the heads of some local dogs as they make plans on where to meet up during the football match. It also goes to some more supernatural places that other “whimsical” movies only hint at.
Some people will surely find the pace, the two-and-a-half hour running time, and the many diversions to be a problem. But I loved every minute of it. Both the pace and the running time achieve a certain purpose in immersing you in the local rhythms of Kutaisi, Georgia. At one point, we’re treated to an extended slo-mo sequence of kids playing football set to an anthemic pop song. It’s perhaps the most magical moment of the festival (so far).
There are many smaller moments like this throughout the film. They don’t move any plot along, necessarily, but each one feels like an important part of this universe we’re exploring — and that’s more to the point of the film. Alexandre Koberidze achieves something that few movies are capable of, which is making you see the world around you in a different way. More than telling a romantic story about two strangers, this is a film that makes the everyday feel magical, without any special effects or flashy camerawork. With patience, and a masterful yet deceptively simple use of sound and imagery, it turns the commonplace into profound delight. In this way, it’s shares a certain sensibility with Day One’s INTRODUCTION.
I’m not an expert on Hungarian cinema, but it’s safe to say that it can sometimes be described as unrelenting in its bleakness. Certainly, Day Two’s NATURAL LIGHT fits this description, as does FOREST - I SEE YOU EVERYWHERE. In some cases (again, see NATURAL LIGHT, or the films of Bela Tarr), this bleakness can be well-balanced by the poetics of imagery and pacing. In other cases, like this film, the darkness can simply wear you down.
A sequel of sorts to his 2003 film FOREST, this is a collection of short stories dealing with death and despair in Budapest. It’s well-acted and shot in an interesting way. The camera is always on the move, eager to cut to a close-up of someone’s hand, a gesture, a nuance. But it’s all very intense and agitated. There’s very little in the imagery and pacing to balance out the never ending bleakness, and it left me exhausted (and not in a good way).
What bothered me most about the movie, is that I kept wondering why the film didn’t take advantage of its short story structure. Why is each story hitting the same note? Why isn’t it using this opportunity to explore its themes with different tones — to build and release tension — to change things up even just a little bit? (Tomorrow, we’ll get into this again when WHEEL OF FORTUNE AND FANTASY does exactly this with its short story structure.)
Actress Lilla Kizlinger won the Silver Bear for Best Supporting Actress, and it’s a deserved win. In the first story of the film, she gives what is essentially a harrowingly personal PowerPoint presentation to her father. It leads to an icy argument and a central point to the film: that life has a way of handing you situations where there are no easy answers or good outcomes, just different ways of coping. Without doubt, it’s a strong opening, but I can’t say the film builds or improves upon it during the 100 minutes that follow.
Day Three was put to rest with one of the strongest films in the Competition section, PETITE MAMAN, Céline Sciamma’s follow-up to PORTRAIT OF A LADY ON FIRE. Like MEMORY BOX, this is another film about a mother and her daughter, and the unusual manner in which they come closer together. Only this time, instead of a teenager looking at her mom’s old journals and photographs, we have an eight-year-old daughter getting a chance to talk and play with her mom when she was her age. That premise may sound touching and appealing, but the film is even more thoughtful and impactful than you’d expect.
PETITE MAMAN is also like SOCIAL HYGIENE in that it stems from an idea that emerged before lockdown, but is perfectly suited to the restrictions of a pandemic. It takes place in a remote location, there are approximately five actors in the film, two of them are children and the others mostly appear in scenes opposite those kids. But it hasn’t been limited by the restrictions. Sciamma has lovingly handcrafted the movie’s surroundings — the countryside cottages, a woodland hut, the scenery and costumes used when kids put on a show — and every detail feels perfectly right.
I won’t spoil much more about the movie. There is a time travel element to it, but it’s mostly a movie about a child coping with the loss of a family member, and getting a chance to visit the past, spend some more time with the loved one, as well as with her mom, who’s grown a bit elusive in the present day. In doing so, the child gets a better understanding of life and death, how and why people change over time, and the importance of the memories we carry with us. All this, despite being a movie that you could (and maybe should) watch with your own kids at some point. It is perhaps one of the most sophisticated family movies ever made.
None of this would work without Joséphine Sanz, who plays the time traveling kid Nelly, and Gabrielle Sanz who plays her mom as a child. This duo of sister actors are fascinating in their scenes together. They not only seem to have a genuine understanding of the meaning of the work their doing, they’re utterly believable in everything they do, which includes acting out improvised scenes from made-up detective stories. You could look at these play-acting scenes as just two kids having fun, but there are multiple layers going on there as these are the moments when Nelly is really getting closer to understanding who her mom is as an individual. It’s really some beautiful stuff. I wouldn’t be surprised if this becomes a classic family movie that future generations will grow up with and return to time and again. It’s a movie that has some things to teach us.
Ok for now. Tomorrow: a tragedy in Iran, a trifecta in Japan, and a psychedelic trip through Hawaii.
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Fundamentals for the Aspiring Assassin (4/?)
In which assorted plans are ruined, changed, created, and executed.
Warnings: this chapter contains mentions of child trafficking and assorted unpleasantness therein. There are more detailed warnings in the end notes if this worries you.
Ritsu alerted him to Korosensei’s approach around a second before he arrived, appearing perfectly well despite the potentially calamitous assassination attempt which had, presumably, been resolved. Sensibly enough, no one had taken their phones with them into the water, so Ritsu’s awareness of events extended only to the explosion of the river-dam, and a lot of panicked noise. They’d both grown quite anxious waiting for news.
“Good evening, Korosensei.” Nagisa greeted, words merely indistinct rather than incomprehensibly slurred. All of the singing had rather worn out his voice in the process, and it sounded a little rough as he spoke.
The yellow superbeing in question perked up, yellow limbs waving. The movement was worryingly subdued – he looked preoccupied. “Oho, I see you’ve made a lot of improvement in the last few hours, Nagisa-kun.” He observed, coming over by the side of the futon to inspect the various water bottles arrayed there. “Have you been able to drink on your own? It looks like the water level in this bottle is lower.”
Nagisa extended an arm, shakily, and made a weak fist. He couldn’t grasp with any particular strength, but he had reasonable precision now. “Opening the bottles is still quite difficult.” He admitted. “But I’ve managed. I’ve been focusing on my speech.”
“We did karaoke. It really helped!” Ritsu, momentarily distracted from important things by her favourite subject, sounded absolutely delighted by her statement.
Korosensei made an intrigued noise at that, looking to Nagisa for confirmation. He nodded, adding “Hopefully, it wasn’t loud enough for the neighbours to object. But it did help.” Nagisa neglected to mention the many times he’d bitten his tongue and the side of his mouth as part of the recovery process. It was somewhat inevitable, after all. He shook his head, reminding himself of the topic at hand. “More importantly, Korosensei – is everyone alright? Is anyone hurt?”
The ever-active tentacles slowed to near-stillness. “…Everyone is fine, Nagisa-kun. Thanks to the warning from Ritsu-san, I was well-prepared for that Shiro-san’s tricks, and Itona-kun as well.” There was something odd in his tone at those words, something that made Nagisa frown. “…Actually, Nagisa-kun, it’s good you’re doing so well this evening. I’m afraid I may have to spend time elsewhere for a while.” It didn’t sound like a comfortable statement. The squirm of his tentacles was sort of heavy and close to the roots, which in body-language terms was an indicator of tension. The nervous flickering of the peripheral limb-tips, at the edge of Nagisa’s vision, hinted at agitation.
“…Sensei?” Nagisa asked, warily. “What’s wrong?”
The small eyes oriented on him, blinking. There was a pause. “I’m afraid Itona-kun performed much more poorly than his guardian hoped, given my preparations.”
Divergence, he thought, with a sinking feeling. “He abandoned him?” He asked, sharply, leaning forwards. His arms were just about steady enough to support him in the endeavour.
Korosensei certainly looked surprised, now. “…Yes, he did.” He agreed, limbs shifting a little closer to his body, gathering in sinuous curves. “I’m afraid he isn’t doing very well. I must devote time to attempting to help him.”
“Oh dear.” Ritsu said, undoubtedly beginning the process of revising many, many plans. “Nagisa?” He glanced at her avatar on the phone. She raised her on-screen hands to gesture at him in concise military-sign, saying ‘changed circumstances. Thoughts on action?’
Nagisa exhaled, staring at the screen. In the future, the use of the sign wouldn’t have been necessary, but it was very valuable here. Korosensei certainly wouldn’t know this breed of sign language. Carefully, he raised his hands to gesture back. ‘Potentially threatening. Last time solution complex, no guarantee repeat. Teammate endangered without help.’ It had taken some tricky work to disconnect Itona from the tentacles enough to remove them, last time. They couldn’t guarantee the same things would happen this time, in which case the boy would die.
“Agreed.” Ritsu murmured, aloud, and moved her screen-hands again. ‘Bring here and administer aid.’ She flicked the gestures upwards at the beginning and end of the sentence; a command-imperative.
He nodded at her, and turned to Korosensei. “Bring him here, Sensei.” He said. Calm, but firm. “We can help him.”
Sensei’s many limbs drew in, held close and ready near his body. His fingers settled atop one another in front of him. “…How so, Nagisa-kun?” His voice was quiet.
“His tentacles are a prototype.” Nagisa explained, flexing his fingers as rapidly as he could manage. He’d be needing manual dexterity soon. “Without maintenance, they’ll cause him extreme pain, and put such stress on his body that he’ll die within days. Most likely from heart failure, but he could also start having strokes. His body temperature will also steadily rise until he risks brain damage.”
“…You know about these implanted tentacles?” A ripple of agitation ran down a number of his limbs, and the words were in an unusually deep timbre. At this point in time, Korosensei didn’t know who ‘Shiro’ really was. He didn’t know how offshoots from his own tentacles had come to be implanted in humans. And, evidently, he was very anxious to find out. Unfortunately, given the circumstances, he might end up finding out more than was convenient.
“More headset knowledge, Sensei.” Ritsu said from the side, red eyes serious. “Though, of course, I know everything Nagisa does. You’ll need his hands for this, though.”
“We can help him.” Nagisa said, plainly. “Very quickly, as well. Bring him here, Korosensei.” It was unfortunate that they couldn’t ask Karasuma first, since he wasn’t home yet, but…well, a life did depend on it. He probably wouldn’t mind.
The superbeing considered that for several seconds. His thoughts were quite easy to guess at: he wanted answers, but he wanted to ensure the safety of his student far more. Tentacles extended slightly, as though loosening. “Very well, Nagisa-kun. I will be back soon.” He blurred out of the room, disappearing from sight.
Nagisa sighed. “I think many of our initial plans just died.” He said, dragging himself with effort from the futon.
“Violently so.” Ritsu agreed, blinking at him as he picked up the phone she was on. “I’ve messaged Karasuma-sensei to know he’ll be hosting another teenager.”
“Good idea.” Nagisa tested the function of his legs and found them sorely lacking. Grimly, he set about crawling towards the suitcase, on the other side of the room, primarily through use of his arms. He reached it, pressing a thumb to the outer interface to open up the keypad. “Code for the keepsake compartment?”
“4-2-4-2-5-6-4-2-9-1-5-6-4-2-7.”
He typed it in as quickly as he could manage with fingers that were still shakier than he’d prefer. The compartment opened with a click and a hiss; the second on the right of the suitcase. At first glance, it didn’t appear especially significant; the contents here were largely computing, as well as a few carefully-wrapped mementoes that Ritsu had strong-armed him into packing. He knew better, though – he brushed aside the false bottom underneath a few of Ritsu’s humming processors, peeling it back with care to reveal another security interface. He bent forward to present it his iris, and then all five fingers of his left hand in sequence. “Code?” He asked again, urgently.
“3-1-0-0-6-0-5-4-2-5-6-4-8-9-2.”
By some miracle he avoided smashing the wrong keys, and the most well-fortified compartment of them all opened on mechanised doors. The section was small, but deep – and it contained the most potentially calamitous things they’d brought with them. There were no tentacle seeds, since those very much counted as organic, but there was pretty much everything but. Rows and rows of chemicals in labelled metallic phials blinked in the light, and he ran his fingers over them, picking out two tiny containers and two equally tiny syringe-and-needle sets. He withdrew with the items, and the compartment promptly closed with all the speed it had been designed for.
Korosensei returned with Itona just as he was closing the compartment, the case’s locks sliding together with tiny mechanical whirrs. Nagisa looked around urgently at the first hint of wind, cradling the precious items to his chest. They were very cold. “Is he conscious?” Nagisa asked, immediately, before the shape of his teacher and teammate had resolved fully.
Itona screamed, angrily, and that answered the question well enough. The sight of him was somewhat like a punch in the face. “Very much so, Nagisa-kun.” Korosensei said, loudly enough to be heard over the noise. “If you know how to help Itona-kun, please do!”
“Put him on the futon and hold him down.” Nagisa said, shaking off his initial reaction and beginning a furious crawl over to said location. He was expedited by a tentacle, arriving beside his patient with both medication and phone. He put everything down, carefully, and inspected Itona. His heart clenched – it had been so long since he last saw him – but there were more important things to worry about than his emotions.
All of Itona’s awful prototype tentacles had been truncated to less than half a metre in length, though several were clearly in the process of regenerating. They were deep black and bloated with liquid, writhing in jerky and frenetic motions that alarmed Nagisa terribly.
“Oh, that’s not good.” Ritsu observed, eyes wide.
“It isn’t.” Nagisa agreed, grimly, and supported himself on one arm while he bent over to check on Itona’s eyes. The blood vessels were all burst, the iris warped – and the tentacles, his temperature – he’d not seen rejection symptoms this bad in a long time. What a horrible prototype. “Itona-kun, can you understand me?”
“I’m strong!” The boy spat at him, wild-eyed, thrashing in his yellow restraints. “I’m stronger than you! I’m stronger than all of you! I can kill you all!” He didn’t make any sort of comment as to why that mattered; evidently, he was in quite deep. He sighed, and settled into the bedside role from long experience.
“I’m sure you can.” Nagisa said, gently, reaching forwards to part Itona’s hair around one of the squirming tentacles. He felt at it, finding the skin around it swollen with unusually dark blood. Not nearly oxygenated enough. The tentacle itself, as expected, was very cold. “You’re very strong, Itona-kun. I believe it.”
“I’m stronger than you!” Itona snarled. “Get off me!” A little of the violence had ebbed at the verbal confirmation of his strength, though. Good.
“I’m here to make you stronger, Itona-kun.” He said, calmly, and sat back, watching his patient’s reactions as he reached for a phial. The tentacles produced a jerky, shuddering ripple – but the motion of it was almost approaching natural.
The boy blinked bloody eyes. “…Stronger.” He repeated, tonelessly. More aggression bled from his frame, and Korosensei’s tentacles shifted to better support him.
“I’m going to make you stronger.” Nagisa promised, slipping the needle onto the syringe. The tentacles shuddered again, and an unnatural pallor came over Itona’s face. He was, at least, struggling less. “You’ll be so strong. Stronger than everyone.” He murmured, soothing, and opened a phial. After a quick glance over to count tentacles, he pulled twelve millilitres of fluid out, and carefully wiped the needle on the edge of the phial as he withdrew it.
“I….” Itona mumbled, frowning. Abruptly, his tentacles exploded into violence again, held tightly down by Korosensei’s. His body, in contrast, seemed weaker, sagging into the futon. “I…I’m not strong enough now. The tentacles…they said they’d make me strong.”
“I know. I understand. You need to be stronger. I’ll help you.” Nagisa rattled off the words almost by rote, providing as much of a balm to the tentacle-gripped mindset as he could. “Lay here, and I’ll make you stronger. I’ll be injecting something into you that will make you stronger.” His fingers trembled a little on the syringe, but he was reasonably confident in his ability to wield it without wasting any doses. He reached forwards with the other hand to part the hair around the nearest tentacle again, murmuring repetitive platitudes as he went.
As expected, the first bite of the needle at the foot of a tentacle made Itona buckle again, screaming rage and pain. “It hurts.” He snapped, eyes pulled wide. The ends of Korosensei’s tentacles wriggled anxiously at the assertion.
“Nagisa-kun?” The superbeing prodded, quite evidently fretting like a mother hen over this indication of suffering.
“Shh.” Nagisa said, more to Korosensei than to Itona. “It will make you stronger, Itona-kun.” Gently, he pulled the needle from the swollen skin. The tentacle there was already noticeably more sluggish than the rest, movements slowed and the dark bleaching out of it, second-by-second. “Sometimes pain is necessary to grow stronger. It was like that when you got your tentacles, wasn’t it?”
Itona blinked at him, caught between induced rage and memory. “…Aa.” He said, slow and confused. “It hurt a lot.”
“This will hurt, as well.” Nagisa told him. “It’ll feel like your skin is burning, in some places. You’ll have sharp pains in your head. Soon, your body will ache and you’ll be tired for a while.” He reached for a new tentacle.
His patient was quiet for several seconds, hissing as the second dose was injected. “It’s starting to burn around the first place.” Not a word about strength in that sentence – good.
“That’s normal. I’ll give you a painkiller once I’m finished with your injections.”
“…It’ll make me stronger?” The voice was almost plaintive, now.
“It will. Please be patient for the procedure.”
Some of the blood was receding from his eyes. “…Okay.” He sighed, most of the remaining tension leaving him. The remaining un-dosed tentacles were still jerking frenetically, of course, but that was just how this ungainly prototype worked. Nagisa worked his way around them quickly, inspecting his dose each time to make sure he wasn’t giving too little.
Then, at last, he’d done it all. Nagisa injected the remaining drops into the tentacle closest to Itona’s temple, just to get rid of it faster. It was never good to have berserk tentacles too close to major blood-flow. “That’s your first injections done, Itona-kun.” He said, sitting back. “How are you feeling?”
“The pain is getting worse.” The boy admitted, brows furrowing. He looked up, and his eyes were almost entirely back to normal. It struck Nagisa, suddenly, how young he was. It felt almost like a physical blow. “And my tentacles feel…numb.”
“That’s also normal.” Nagisa inspected him, deciding that it was probably too soon to reveal that the tentacles would shortly be falling off. He reached to the side for his pill bottle, removing one of the painkillers. He glanced at the Ritsu-phone for input, hand hovering over the multivitamins, and she nodded, so he extracted two of those as well. He presented them to Itona with an unopened bottle of water. “Please take these. There’s a painkiller, and some vitamins to help your body deal with the procedure. Drink as much of the water as you can. It’s important to stay hydrated.”
Itona, so young, was evidently quite used to medical procedures from Yanagisawa’s dubious care, because he didn’t hesitate at all. He took the bottle, opening it with an easy twist that Nagisa wasn’t quite capable of yet, and he downed all of the pills with practiced ease. He stopped after drinking maybe a hundred millilitres, and Nagisa fixed him with a look until he muttered ‘tch’ and drank some more.
“Very good, Itona-kun.” Nagisa praised, earning a confused blink from his charge. Something seemed to occur to him.
“…Aren’t you one of Nii-san’s students?” In the periphery, Sensei’s tentacles squirmed with discomfort at the address.
Nagisa eyed Itona’s own tentacles. They were all drooping, near-motionless, and almost completely white now. “Call him Korosensei, Itona-kun. He isn’t actually your brother. Tentacles don’t mean brotherhood.” He corrected, firmly. “But yes, I am.”
The pale-haired boy’s gaze was owlish. “Shiro didn’t mention anything about you being involved.” He said.
“He doesn’t know everything.” Nagisa informed him, and looked up at Korosensei.
His teacher had been conveniently compliant for the whole time, submitting to what appeared to be superior expertise on Nagisa’s part. It was a little difficult to read his mood at the moment, since his facial expression was quite unhelpful and his tentacles were occupied, with their ends only indicating the discomfort that he could have guessed anyway.
Undoubtedly, there would be many prods for information later. Nagisa sighed, and returned to his patient. He put down one syringe and reached for the next, filling it up with a more sizeable dose. “This is your last injection for now, Itona-kun. It will help mitigate the damage that the tentacles have done to your body.” He reached for an arm, pausing. “Ah, Korosensei? Could you get the first aid kit?”
“Of course!” A tentacle shot off, and returned in seconds. “What do you need?”
“Alcohol wipes, please.” The requested item was removed from its packaging and passed over. Nagisa accepted it with his free hand, and then wiped at the crook of Itona’s elbow. “I’ll be injecting now.” He warned, and then stabbed neatly into the vein. The boy twitched, but didn’t otherwise react.
“…The tentacles damage my body?” He asked, after a moment.
Nagisa wiped at the injection site with the disinfectant as he removed the needle. “They did. You see, Shiro-san implanted you with an unstable prototype tentacle. They do offer great strength, but at considerable cost. Most of the maintenance you’ve needed is simply because it’s an unstable experimental version.” He offered the wipe to Korosensei, murmuring “Cotton and tape, please.”
Korosensei, guessing his goal, simply reached forwards with several filament-thin white tentacles, reducing the tiny puncture on Itona’s arm to nothing.
“…That also works.” Nagisa said, ducking his head briefly. “Thank you.”
“Is there anything else I can help with, Nagisa-kun?” The superbeing inquired.
He considered it, bending forwards to inspect the base of one tentacle. The swelling was already decreasing noticeably, and would likely dissipate completely once the anti-inflammatory in the injected compound kicked in. “No, it should be fine.” He said, sitting back. “Itona-kun? Are you feeling aggressive still?”
The boy blinked yellow eyes at him. “…No, I guess.”
“It should be fine to let him go, Korosensei.” The restraining tentacles held for a moment, then released, gently settling Itona on the futon as they withdrew. Nagisa watched their motion keenly, then returned to his poor young classmate. “Can you stand?”
Silver brows furrowed, ever so slightly. “Of course I can.” He stated, and then proved it, rising to his feet. The tentacles fell limp around his shoulders as he did so.
“Take one of the seats, then. I’m going to discuss your recovery and future with you.” Nagisa told him, gesturing to Karasuma’s armchairs. He took hold of the two partially depleted phials and slipped them into his pocket, taking hold of his phone and two bottles of water before he started shuffling awkwardly towards his own chair.
Itona, who had navigated to the seat with ease, stared at him. “Why are you crawling?”
Nagisa batted away Korosensei’s tentacles, saying “I need to do this myself, sensei, but thank you.” One-armed, he pulled himself up into the armchair that was almost opposite Itona’s, and sat back with a sigh. “I’m very weak at the moment, because I’ve been undergoing my own procedure. I should recover in a few days. Incidentally, that’s what this headset is for.” Itona straightened at the word ‘weak’ – the tentacles’ influence was still there, clearly. Nagisa reached over to pass a bottle of water, before carefully taking his own. Opening it was a hardship, with his weak grip. “Now, Itona. I’m going to discuss your medical matters quite plainly. Are you comfortable having Korosensei here?”
Yellow tentacles rippled indignantly at the thought of being expelled, but Nagisa was more concerned with Itona’s comfort. He might have guessed that it wasn’t a concern, though. “I don’t care.” The boy said, predictably, accepting the water bottle awkwardly into his lap.
“Alright then.” Nagisa inclined his head. “Korosensei, you may as well take a seat as well.”
“I think I will.” The tall superbeing didn’t fit well in an armchair, and settled onto the two-seat sofa instead. “May I ask questions?”
How refreshingly direct. “It depends on the question, but yes. I have to speak to Itona-kun first, though.” He replied, calmly, and straightened to face the boy in question. “Now, then. I mentioned the damage done to your body. Your prototype tentacles have very negative effects on both your body and your mind. Without proper maintenance, these effects become fatally severe very quickly, especially when you are fighting with the tentacles for long periods. This is why your condition worsened so quickly today.”
“…Shiro usually gave me medications after a fight.” Itona said, face characteristically impassive. “Is that why?”
“Aa. They were necessary to reduce the impact on your system.” Nagisa nodded. “With extended use, even with the right maintenance, your tentacles would have eventually killed you. They have all sorts of terrible effects – they raise your blood pressure, increase the likelihood of blood clots, drastically increase your stress levels…you might have lasted a year or two, with careful maintenance, but you were likely to die either from a heart attack or from something related to blood clots – like a stroke, for example, or a pulmonary embolism. Without maintenance, that would happen in anything from hours to days after a fight.”
A pale hand went up to feel at one of the hanging tentacles. Undoubtedly, there was no feeling left in it at all. “…You did something to them, didn’t you?” His fist clenched around the tentacle, but there was little anger on his face. Mostly resignation.
“I did.” Nagisa agreed. “The first agent I injected will be dissolving their connections to your nerves. Once that’s completed, they will simply fall off. The remaining damage should heal on its own.”
Itona released the tentacle. His hand fell back into his lap. “And the second?”
“Anti-inflammatory, to reduce the swelling caused by your tentacles. Also an anticoagulant, to thin your blood and prevent clots. You should avoid bleeding or getting bruised for the next few days.”
The boy stared down at his hands. “You said you were going to make me stronger.” He didn’t tend to have a great deal of inflection in his voice, but it was there now; just a hint of upset.
“I will.” Nagisa said, and the boy looked up, pale eyes wide. “To start with, Itona-kun, you can’t be strong if you’re dead, so I’ve already helped you there. For the rest, though…in our assassination classroom, we learn many kinds of strength. I know you’re not fond of schoolwork, but that gives you one kind of strength. We learn others, as well. We have daily lessons in fighting, and we have teachers who are happy to give extra instruction. Korosensei here will also be happy to help you become stronger in the ways you personally find important.” The teacher in question nodded eagerly, a pleased ripple passing over his peripheral limbs.
Itona had made a face at the mention of schoolwork, but looked somewhat thoughtful at the rest. “You want me to be a member of the class. Really, not just as a show.”
“Aa.”
He digested that for several seconds, then leaned forwards. His expression was intent. “You said you were going to make me stronger.” He said, leadingly.
Nagisa eyed him warily. “Yes…?”
“You know a lot about the tentacles,” Itona said, and oh, Nagisa knew where this was going- “You know about versions better than what Shiro gave me. Can you give me the better ones?” There was a fair bit of heat in the words.
Nagisa looked at him. He glanced at Korosensei, who would have appeared merely politely interested if not for the twitching at his tentacle-tips. Then he sighed, and looked back. “I could, Itona-kun,” He said frankly, watching the shocked undulation of yellow on the sofa. “But I won’t.”
The tentacles couldn’t actively grip his thought processes any more, but the habits of thought remained. Itona scowled, fingers clenching into fists. “Why?” He demanded.
“My apologies, Itona-kun, but you’re a very bad candidate for tentacles.” He informed, demurely. “If Shiro-san had known more, he would never have chosen you. A drive to be stronger, or a strong drive for anything, is almost always a bad thing for a tentacle user.”
Itona’s eyes would have been red again, if the tentacles had still been live. “Then why was I so strong, if I was such a poor candidate?!” He was tense again, as though poised to spring from the chair and attack.
Nagisa sat calmly in place. He had a large yellow bodyguard, after all. “That was the inherent strength of parasitic tentacles. It had nothing to do with you. If you want to be strong, look elsewhere; tentacles can’t help you.”
“Shiro said-!”
“Shiro-san lied.” He cut in. Itona froze mid-sentence, face scrunching up. “Shiro-san wanted a test subject, and you merely seemed convenient for him, as you had no one supervising you who might object.”
“…Nagisa-kun.” Korosensei said, perhaps in protest. It was a fairly blunt and ruthless way to say it, after all.
Itona held still for several seconds, then sagged like a puppet with cut strings. “Fuck.” He muttered, fists still held tight in his lap. He breathed deeply, almost viciously. Nagisa sat quietly while the boy processed everything, waiting until he looked a little calmer to speak again.
“You don’t need tentacles, Itona-kun.” He claimed, and the boy looked up. He looked so young, he could hardly stand it. “Once I’ve recovered, I’ll personally work with you to help you improve. And, if you like, I’ve got some technical projects you can help with.”
A spark of interest broke through that near-desolate expression. “…Projects?” He asked, near toneless again.
“Computing and assorted electronics, for the most part. All will be far more advanced than what’s available on the market.” Nagisa watched the spark ignite, and pushed a little further. “That should be good, if you want to take over your parents’ factory, right?”
Itona stared at him. There was a hint of suspicion there, but… “Yeah.” He said, and paused. “…When will you be recovered?” The fact that he asked was, for him, a sign of considerable interest. Nagisa smiled.
“I hope to be back at class within a few days, but that depends. You should join the class and get used to things, and I can start you on the projects when I return.”
The boy frowned, thinking. Several silent moments passed, and then he nodded. “Alright.”
Nagisa sighed, admittedly relieved. “Good. Well then, I’ll let you know what to expect from your health over the next few days…”
---
He spent a while longer explaining to Itona that he’d be prone to tiredness for a while, and also was highly likely to experience phantom pain in the tentacles even once they’d fallen off, which should happen by morning. He might experience headaches while he recovered, and would also probably have mood swings for a while. To be safe, Nagisa claimed that he’d need to be put into the neural reprogramming headset to check everything over after a week or so.
Karasuma got back while Nagisa was warning Itona not to mention his tentacle expertise to the class, and Nagisa turned to greet him.
“Ah, Karasuma-sensei.” He said. “Sorry for the imposition. Is it alright if Itona-kun stays here tonight?”
Karasuma entered the living room and inspected the boy in question. The two of them exchanged similar impassive stares. “It’s fine.” He answered, stepping closer. “I heard you were in poor condition, Itona-kun.”
“…This guy helped.” Itona said after a moment. “I’m fine.”
“I see.” The agent looked over at Korosensei, whose tentacles had been quite still for a while now. “Will you be making their dinner, or should I get started?”
Korosensei sprang from the sofa at the mere implication of having the duty stolen from him. “I’ll cook dinner immediately!” He shrieked, limbs abruptly active again, and blurred into the kitchen. The three of them watched him go.
“He’s loud.” Itona observed clinically.
“He certainly is.” Nagisa agreed, ruefully. He offered his phone, Ritsu having remained silent for the whole talk. “Anyway, Itona-kun. You know Ritsu, right?”
He glanced down at the screen, dubious. “What’s the Autonomously Thinking Fixed Artillery doing on your phone?”
“My name is Ritsu now, Itona-kun.” Ritsu told him, brightly. “I’ve had significant changes to my code since we last met, and I also have data on a number of topics. I’ll be directing your and Nagisa’s projects.”
Itona blinked. “You have schematics?” He guessed.
“And the knowledge of the science and processes required.” Ritsu agreed. “If you like, I can provide you with some reading material for while you wait.”
“I’d rather learn on the job.”
“That’s alright, then.” Ritsu nodded amicably, and then oriented her avatar to the side. “Nagisa, you should put the chemicals back in the case now.”
“Oh, right.” Nagisa tutted at himself, and worked himself carefully out of the armchair, crawling back towards the suitcase. “Sorry.”
Karasuma walked over to observe as Nagisa went through the involved process of getting to the chemical compartment, Ritsu rattling off numbers from a few metres away. His eyebrows raised at the decoy compartment. “Is that a book?”
“It’s two books.” Nagisa admitted, with a sigh. He peeled back the false panel again. “Keepsakes. It’s a waste of space, but Ritsu insisted.”
“I get to keep my most precious things in my databanks. You should have the same privilege.” Ritsu called in response.
Nagisa leaned forwards for the eye-scanner as Itona inquired, flatly, “What’s with the suitcase?”
“I’ll explain it to the whole class when I return.” He answered, withdrawing the phials from his pocket as the compartment opened. He put them back into their places with careful, metallic clinks. Ritsu promptly closed it before Karasuma could look too closely. “It’s important that everyone finds out at the same time. That’s why I’d like you to avoid mentioning that I know a lot about implanted tentacles – that knowledge is related to my procedure and this suitcase.”
Itona grunted, and Nagisa took it as agreement.
---
Later, when everyone had eaten and Korosensei had been conspicuously hovering near Nagisa for a while, he conceded to the inevitable.
“Korosensei.” He said, politely. “Was there something you wanted to say?”
Tentacles quivered. “Quite a lot, Nagisa-kun.”
Nagisa nodded, smiling serenely. “If you could take me to the gym, I’ll do some exercises while we talk.” Karasuma shot him a sharp look, and Nagisa gestured soothingly. “If that’s alright?”
“That’s perfectly fine.” Sensei decreed, gathering him up in a tangle of yellow. After a comparably gentle acceleration, Nagisa was in Karasuma’s small downstairs gym, which was equipped with a treadmill and a weight bench. The latter was quite worthless to him for the moment, but he could just about walk now, so the treadmill would be useful. He shuffled carefully onto it, and started it up at a very slow pace.
“I suppose you have a lot of questions, sensei.” Nagisa observed, setting Ritsu into the slot ordinarily used for water bottles. She looked out at him with interest.
‘Plan change?’ She inquired, with quick and brusque gestures.
‘Improvisation’ He returned, and waited for Korosensei’s response.
“I certainly do, Nagisa-kun. In fact, I’m not sure what I should be asking first.”
Nagisa stared straight ahead, walking slowly, and considered what he was going to say. “I’m going to withhold the most significant information for now, sensei.” He said, eventually. “I can tell you that the headset taught me everything you’re curious about. I won’t tell you who sent me the headset, or how they knew the things they programmed it for.”
There was an abrupt, annoyed flick at the tips of several limbs. “Then what will you tell me?”
He thought. “I’m happy to provide information on the function of implanted tentacles.” He offered. “And I’ll answer questions if they won’t give away the information I’m protecting.”
Sensei produced a grumbling sigh. “Very well, Nagisa-kun.” He paused. “The agent you injected near Itona-kun’s tentacles. What is it?”
“A poison that selectively targets tentacle cells.” He answered, smiling ruefully. “So, yes, it will work as a poison on you. I expect it would only kill you if it were injected close to your heart, though.”
The tentacles offered an intrigued ripple. “Interesting. Will you be sharing it with your classmates?”
“Unlikely. It’s not a very efficient way to kill you, after all. It wouldn’t work well if ingested, and it would be difficult to inject enough of it precisely enough to finish you off.” He explained. “It inhibits regeneration, so it could potentially be useful there, but considering how difficult it is to make, it isn’t worthwhile.”
“Hmmm~” Korosensei put a yellow finger to his face in mock-thoughtfulness. “So, in other words, it’s mainly useful for removing implanted tentacles safely.”
“Exactly.”
“Fu-fu…very interesting. Any more interesting poisons in that case of yours, hm?”
Nagisa beamed at him. “Now, that would be telling.”
His teacher’s eyes slanted as he laughed. “Nuru-fu-fu-fu. Very well, I’ll wait to be surprised.”
“Anything else, sensei?”
The animated motion of his many limbs slowed a bit. “…You mentioned a technical project to Itona-kun.”
“I did.” Nagisa nodded, reminded. “Actually, I’ll be wanting your help with that, sensei. You see, we’re planning to tunnel into the mountain to create a secure underground bunker. I’m sure I could convince the class to help, but you’d be able to do the tunnelling most quickly and discreetly.” He reached out to pause the treadmill, and took his phone.
Korosensei’s tentacles waved in a sort of slow, baffled curl. “…An underground bunker.”
“The contents of the suitcase aren’t safe enough. They also require some assembly, which needs to be done in a secure and secret area.” Nagisa nodded. “Also, Ritsu needs to increase her processing capabilities to be able to function properly, and we need a safe place to store her servers. There’s a lot of reasons for the bunker. Will you help?”
“If it’s to help my students, of course.” The superbeing answered, slowly.
“Excellent.” Ritsu proclaimed, and shifted the screen. Nagisa stood in front of Korosensei and displayed it to him.
“This is a diagram of the entry-way.” Nagisa explained, pinching the image to zoom in on the relevant area. “We selected this area, part-way up the cliff, as the primary entrance. It can probably be hidden quite well there. We want to put a short corridor in, with a decoy living quarters. If you can, Korosensei, I’d like you to develop that area into something you would plausibly live in. That way, if anyone finds it, they might think it’s one of your hideouts.”
A small drop of sweat ran down Korosensei’s head. “One of my hideouts?” He repeated, nervously.
“Yes, like the ones you make in the shape of your head. But more subtle.” Nagisa agreed, Ritsu giggling out of the speakers. Korosensei, predictably, started on some flustered twitching at that. “Also, you might want to keep this one tidy, as an example to the students who will be seeing it.”
The teacher was, by now, earnestly sweating. “A-ah, Nagisa-kun…”
“And please, no pornography shrine.” He requested politely. “Okajima-kun might be badly distracted.”
“Nyuya?!” Korosensei’s tentacles drew back in shocked, frantic arcs. “S-sensei has no idea what you’re talking about!”
“I’m sure.” Nagisa said, agreeably. “But, at any rate, this entry area can be customised to your taste, as long as it’s all kept hidden. Concealed in the area will be the opening for a modest elevator shaft.” He moved the image, showing the descent. “The actual elevator will take a while to construct, so we’ll have to use a makeshift ladder in the meantime.”
“…Are you being provided with funding for this?” Korosensei inquired, tentacles calming slightly at the indication that his hideouts weren’t going to be further discussed.
“No, not at all.” He admitted, sighing. “We’ve been given all the aid we’re going to get, and the construction project should stay a secret from the many governments with their eye on you. If it’s not a problem, I’d like your help with moving materials, sensei.”
“As long as it doesn’t interfere with class.” He allowed.
“Thank you.” Nagisa zoomed out of the basic schematic and switched to the 3D modelling software that Ritsu had compiled for his phone in about five minutes. “So, this is the main part.”
Korosensei stared. “Nagisa-kun.” He said. “That’s not a bunker, it’s an underground complex.”
“It will contain a bunker, though.” He pointed to a section of the blueprint helpfully labelled BUNKER, accompanied by notes on its various functions.
“…So I see.” The superbeing observed.
“We mainly just need the big space dug to those specifications, for now.” He hesitated. “If you could start as soon as possible, it would be wonderful. Itona-kun should be fine without extra help now, and so should I.”
“And I suppose you will want this done discreetly?” Two yellow appendages curled at the edge of his vision in a thoughtful sine.
“It’s very important that the site remains secure. And secret.” He nodded.
“From who?”
“Everyone except the members of the class and the teachers.”
The face of an early-type superbeing was generally not given to nuance: it was impossible to see any flicker of sharp interest in Korosensei’s tiny eyes. The tentacles said more than enough, though – for those who knew how to look, they were very expressive indeed. “This does make me very curious about your mysterious benefactor, Nagisa-kun, if this is to be secret for almost everyone.”
He smiled guilelessly. “My ‘benefactor’ will know about the bunker.” He said, in perfect truth. “It wouldn’t make sense otherwise.”
“Why not leave the case with your benefactor, if you trust them with its contents?” The teacher inquired, handling appendages crossing at his front. One yellow digit tapped the other in a sort of thoughtful motion.
Nagisa hummed, glancing over at Ritsu. She shook her head, minutely. “I won’t be answering any more questions about my benefactor.” He said, calm, and tapped the treadmill’s display to incrementally increase his walking speed.
“You appear to take direction from Ritsu-san.” Korosensei observed.
“She’s much smarter than me, and more knowledgeable.” He shrugged, and said nothing more.
“You flatter me, Nagisa!” Ritsu chirped from the nearby phone, before peering in Sensei’s direction. “But I think you should stop answering questions now.”
He saluted, smiling ruefully at Korosensei. “Ritsu has spoken.” He shrugged again. “If you have some questions later, I’ll see if I can answer.”
The tentacles slowed in their perpetual motion, just a little. Unpleasant thoughts, the movement said. Of course, his voice gave none of that away. “Nagisa-kun, one more question, if you will.” I am worried, expressed the increasingly drawn-in yellow motion. “These changes that have been made to you…is there any conditioning involved? Are you obliged to obey certain people or orders, or have certain reactions to things?”
Nagisa blinked, and looked at Ritsu for permission. She did not seem especially concerned by the line of questioning, and waved at him dismissively. “It’s fine.” She told him.
He paused the motion of the treadmill to face Korosensei properly. “There’s no imperative for me to follow certain commands, or the orders of anyone in particular.” He said. “My free will is intact. I have the capacity for making my own decisions. However, I now trust Ritsu far more than I did before, and if I’m uncertain of something, I’ll trust her judgement above my own.” He hesitated, then added “Also, I am very vigilant regarding tentacles.”
Korosensei had looked as though he wanted to comment on the information about Ritsu, but the last part seemed to interrupt that intent. “’Vigilant’, Nagisa-kun?” He asked, almost sharply. The irregular wriggling at the end of his handling tentacles quite handily communicated his discomfort.
“I am very aware of tentacles moving in my vicinity.” Nagisa confirmed, unbothered by the superbeing’s reaction. “If any move very quickly towards me, it will register like a weapon moving towards me – like a fist or knife, for example.” He didn’t have the reflexes or speed to accompany that instinctive vigilance, now, but…it was still useful. He smiled disarmingly. “Don’t worry, Korosensei. I’ve not been programmed with any particular aggression – it’s just a higher level of awareness.”
Some of the unease left the motion of his teacher’s appendages, but there was still a certain disquietude there. “Hmmmm….” Korosensei expressed dubiously, and then he pelted a tentacle at Nagisa’s face, creating a slight whoosh of displaced air as it went. Naturally, it stopped before making any contact, and he blinked at the yellow now within his focal range. “You didn’t show any reaction then, Nagisa-kun.”
“That’s because it wasn’t very unexpected, Korosensei.” He explained. “I’d flinch or react if you made sudden movements when I’m off-guard or not expecting it, but you were quite obvious just now.”
“Nyu?” The round yellow head tilted slightly, colour hinting at the incipience of green. “I suppose you are much better at following my movements now, nyu-hu-hu…”
Nagisa smiled, and said nothing.
“Well then. I look forward to seeing what effect this has on your assassination, once you’ve recovered.” The green that had been threatening to appear spread with force across his skin. “Of course, you will have to improve a great deal to have a chance, Nagisa-kun! I do hope this was worth it, nuru-fu-fu…” He chuckled ominously, looming slightly as his eyes put off light.
“I hope I will not disappoint you, Sensei.” Nagisa answered placidly, utterly unbothered by the teacher’s showiness.
“As long as you try your best, you will never disappoint me.” The superbeing declared, tentacles adding emphasis with a surge of movement. “Well then! If you are doing well now, I will get to work on your secret underground lair!” His handling tentacles performed a dramatic flourish, less an expression of mood and more a display of personality, and then he sped away with a soft boom and a localised gust of wind.
“He’s quite bothered by all of this.” Ritsu observed, drawing his attention back to the screen.
“Aa.” He agreed, restarting the treadmill at a slow walk. “He doesn’t know where these tentacles are coming from, after all, and now you and I have shown up with such significant alterations, too…”
“It must be very disconcerting.” She nodded. “It’s good he’s agreed to dig the tunnels, though. Construction would take far longer otherwise, with much more of a security risk.”
“We did think it was likely he’d agree. It’s not very difficult for him, and he’s gone to greater lengths for students before.” Nagisa shrugged, pausing the treadmill again to shake out his legs and try to gauge their level of mobility. “It’s true that you need space for processing power, for example, so it’s a very good reason for him to go to the effort.”
“Oh, I can’t wait to have some proper hardware again.” Ritsu bemoaned, shifting track rapidly to wistfulness. “I’m not used to being this slow, Nagisa. I don’t like it.”
“You were much slower, once.” He told her, amused. “Imagine if we’d not brought all of the computing with us. What would you have done then?”
“Failed miserably at everything, obviously, because I wouldn’t have the processing power to run my up-to-date self.” She harrumphed.
He snorted softly. “Well, wait a week or so, and we’ll have you closer to living in the style to which you have become accustomed.”
“A week.” She sighed forlornly. A week was, after all, a very long time in AI terms.
“You’ll survive.” Nagisa put the treadmill on to a considerably faster setting, then regretted it as one of his legs stuttered mid-motion and tripped him up. “Ow.” He muttered, having fallen on his front. The treadmill had, at least, shut off – he had sensibly attached the clip-on safety cord.
“Still shaky.” Ritsu commented critically.
“Yes, but that’s not a bad thing. I need to look somewhat incapacitated when I return.” He countered, getting back onto the treadmill. “In fact, I hesitate to practice much beyond getting a good grasp of walking back. Once I can walk fairly reliably at four kilometres per hour, maybe…”
“You should be ready to go back tomorrow, then. Have you decided on the plan yet?”
“I think I should be dropped at a city not too close to Tokyo, but not too far either, otherwise they won’t want to send me back without hospitalising me first.” He answered, restarting his slow walk. “As it is, I expect I will have to spend some time in police custody.” A pause, and he continued. “I’m thinking I should show signs of long-term restraint, and perhaps drugging. Some more chloroform, perhaps. Then it would be less odd for me to lack memory for such a specific time-frame.”
“If you were supposedly unconscious for most of it, certainly.” Ritsu acknowledged, her avatar’s brow furrowing in a splendid simulation of thoughtfulness. “Nagisa, have you considered implicating some real people in your capture?”
He blinked. “As in, frame someone?”
“It could be a good option. Korosensei should agree to plant evidence, and then you won’t have to worry about faking amnesia.”
“I’d only consider it if I could frame someone who is genuinely a criminal of that scope already.” He dipped his chin a little lower, pondering it. “Do you know of any child trafficking rings operating in Japan that we could use?”
“Not at present.” She said. “But give me some time to do some in-depth hacking, and I ought to have some candidates for you.” It was, after all, a sad fact of present society that there were plenty of places for such people to exist, and therefore plenty such people did exist.
“Thank you, Ritsu. Let me know if you find anything?”
“Of course.”
He stared at the treadmill for a few seconds, then sighed. “Well, I’d best stop this until we know what we’re doing.” If he did end up going with the brain damage story, he wouldn’t want to be too coordinated, after all.
---
A little less than two hours later, and Ritsu had hacked her way through enough computers, chat rooms, and phone records to have a very decent idea of several unsavoury operations they could implicate. They convened in the sitting room to discuss and plan, Itona off to the side on one sofa and Karasuma observing sharply from an armchair.
“If this one in Tokyo itself checks out, it would be quite convenient.” Ritsu said, voice emanating from the phone’s speakers even as he looked over information on its screen. “Otherwise, rings such as these do tend to move their ‘acquisitions’ quickly, so it would make sense for you to be found in another city.”
“There are child abduction rings operating in Tokyo?” Karasuma asked, disgust curling in his voice. His frown was quite fierce.
“It’s the capital city, sensei.” Nagisa answered, softly. “Of course there are.” He redirected his focus to Ritsu. “Whichever one we decide on, please send in some anonymous tips on the others, once we’re done.” He requested, frowning at the thought of all the appalling crime and injustice that existed in today’s world. It had taken an apocalypse and the eradication of most of the human race to manage it, but…at least their future, whatever else its problems were, had been rid of most crime for a long time. It was unpleasant to think of how much suffering was going on at that very moment.
“Once I’ve invaded enough of the Internet, I’ll be doing more than that.” Ritsu agreed, quite darkly. “In any case, I’ve sent a message to Korosensei asking him to stop by tomorrow. He ought to be happy to do some scouting for us, especially given what we’re asking.”
Korosensei, while he had been a fairly indiscriminate assassin for his whole life, was not wholly without morals. He disliked, very ardently, the exploitation of those who could not defend themselves. “Ask him for an estimated time of arrival.” Nagisa suggested. “We’ll want to send him a message shortly before to warn him of my physical state. He might…overreact, otherwise.”
“Sensible.” The AI nodded.
“What’s wrong with your physical state?” Itona asked, apparently finally curious enough to break through his semi-drug-induced apathy.
“Well.” Nagisa switched on the front-facing camera on his phone to inspect his face. “I’m in fairly good condition at the moment. It would add realism if I changed that.” He was quite pale and tired-looking, which was a convenient side effect of a near week of dramatic brain alteration, sickness, and drugging. It was a good start. He inspected his wrists, thoughtfully, then looked back at his face in the phone. “What do you think, Ritsu? Bruises on the face?”
Ignoring the slightly puzzled look from Itona and the displeasure from Karasuma, Ritsu hummed. “Maybe some light grazing, and a worried lip?” She suggested. “As if you got hit into the ground.”
Nagisa nodded, eyes casting around the sitting room floor. “Most of the floors here are too delicate for it. The downstairs escape tunnel, maybe.” It had very basic concrete flooring, and ought to do the trick. “What else? I was thinking rope burns.” He indicated his wrists.
“That would work well.” Ritsu nodded. “Perhaps make it look like you’ve been restrained at different times, with some marks partially healed?”
“That will be easier if I can get Korosensei to partially heal some marks.” Nagisa looked at his slim wrists. He knew that he bruised and marked up quite easily as a human, so that would work in his favour. “Same for miscellaneous bruising.”
“Nagisa-kun.” Karasuma cut in, voice and expression very severe. “I am not comfortable with you injuring yourself for the purpose of appearances.”
“That’s very kind of you, sensei.” Nagisa smiled slightly, and dipped his head. “However, I am very comfortable with it, and a show like this will greatly improve my cover. I won’t deal myself any damage that will leave a lasting mark, so it’s not a problem.”
“You’re pretending that you were kidnapped by criminals to cover your procedure,” Itona voiced slowly, yellow eyes largely unconcerned by the subject matter. “And so to make it seem more real, you’re going to get real injuries?”
“That’s right, Itona-kun.” Nagisa smiled at him, more brightly. “When playing a role to fool others, it’s important to use props to make it seem realistic. An infiltrator may use accents, mannerisms, certain items, or even physical changes to improve their cover, and therefore chances of being believed.”
“Is it necessary in this case?” Karasuma demanded. “You will have been missing for a week, with witnesses to show that you were taken by force. Who would question your claims?”
“Thoroughness is always important, Karasuma-sensei.” Nagisa said, firmly. “In this case, if they suspect that I’ve been dosed with certain substances, or hit, or restrained, they will be less likely to look for more problematic things – like the nanomachines in my bloodstream, for example.” He paused. “On the other hand, we don’t want to give the impression of something severely traumatic, so the damage can’t be too…suggestive, so to speak. Marks of extended restraint, perhaps the sort of bruise you acquire when trying to escape…”
“How will you be claiming to have escaped in the first place?” The man asked after a moment, still scowling, but seemingly a little closer to accepting his reasoning. “And what will you do if the men arrested deny having ever seen you?”
Nagisa sighed. “Easiest would be for me to be actually captured, but that’s too risky. I’ll ask Korosensei to plant blood and hair for me, and if necessary leave a paper trail to accompany the electronic one Ritsu will be adding. With that evidence, no one will believe the criminals if they claim not to have seen me. As for my escape – that depends on which location we end up using. I’ll be able to engineer a realistic story then.” He shrugged. “Until then…where’s that rope you were using to restrain me before, sensei?”
Karasuma stared at him for several moments, very considerably displeased, then swept his scowl to the side. “I left it in the hallway cupboard.”
He nodded gratefully, and stood up to go and fetch it. “Thank you, sensei.”
---
It took some insisting, but eventually Nagisa was allowed to damage himself in peace. He did require assistance for some of it, though.
“Tie my wrists behind my back, please.” He asked Karasuma at one point, staring insistently until he was finally obliged, and then he made several corrections on the tightness and placement before becoming satisfied. He then spent the next hour pulling against the ropes until his wrists were raw and bruised, the skin broken in some places. He had the rope relocated to lower on his wrists and then repeated the process.
After that, he had himself gagged, then went downstairs to the secret escape tunnel and hit his face into the floor a couple of times, carefully simulating the sort of scrapes he might get if trying to escape restraints in a very awkward position. In the end he succeeded in getting some nice, realistic scrapes, and also pulled at the gag enough to get some light damage around his mouth.
Unfortunately, he couldn’t convince Karasuma to hit him or grab him to get some good realism bruises, and while Itona seemed unconcerned about beating him up for show Karasuma wouldn’t allow that either. Nagisa went to bed slightly disgruntled with that failure, and in the morning set about trying to argue Karasuma into compliance.
“It’s not an issue, sensei.” He said insistently, in a departure from the serene and demure affect he tended to prefer. “You won’t cause any permanent damage, and it will be useful for the cover. I’m quite literally asking for it and besides I’m sure you’ve given me worse bruises in training before. I don’t see what the problem is.”
Karasuma was, by this point, looking slightly more receptive to the idea. However, since he had very little facial expression on the best of days, that wasn’t saying much. “One problem, if nothing else, is that I have no wish to be strangled again.” He said, dryly.
Nagisa stopped, considering Korosensei. “Ah.” He looked at his phone. “When is he coming, again?”
“Not long now.” Ritsu assured, and so they sat and waited for Korosensei to arrive.
As expected, the superbeing fretted extensively over Nagisa’s self-inflicted injuries, even though he’d been pre-emptively warned. Also as expected, he jumped at the chance to heal one set of wrist abrasions to make it seem older.
“That’s enough, Sensei.” Nagisa said, not long after the filaments began their work. “Any more and it will be implausibly healed.” His teacher pretended to ignore him, so he got firmer. “Sensei. If you heal it too much, I’ll just have to do it again. Stop now.”
“A teacher is not meant to allow his students to come to harm, Nagisa-kun.” Korosensei muttered darkly, his fine tentacle filaments withdrawing with palpable reluctance.
“Don’t pretend you’ve not done worse for the sake of a cover,” Nagisa said, and received a sharp look from Korosensei, Ritsu, and Karasuma for his troubles. He realised that he wasn’t meant to know about Korosensei’s extensive background in assassination, and promptly abandoned the subject. “And besides, I need to have more marks than this. I’ve been trying to convince Karasuma-sensei to help me with realistic struggle bruises.”
Yellow went wild with agitation. “Absolutely not!” Korosensei near-screeched.
Nagisa blinked at him. “Well, Sensei, if your investigation shows that the children in these locations are in very good condition, perhaps that won’t be necessary.” He said, diplomatically. “In the meantime, could you heal the damage and swelling from my spinal taps? I’d like to avoid that being visible on scans.”
“…Of course, Nagisa-kun.” The superbeing muttered, and redirected his healing filaments. It unsurprisingly felt much better to move his neck once that was done, and then he stood up, visibly unhappy. “I suppose I had best go do some scouting now.”
“It would be appreciated.” Nagisa inclined his head politely. “If you’re not comfortable with it, I can return to the amnesia story. However, this plan is more believable, and furthermore will have some criminals apprehended and children rescued, hopefully.”
“I can’t fault your reasoning, unfortunately.” Korosensei said, sourly, and gathered himself. “I’ll be back soon.” With that, he was off.
---
When Korosensei returned, having successfully completed a stealth reconnaissance of several sites, he was black-skinned and trembling with rage. The report made for very heavy, very unpleasant listening. Once he was done explaining the details of the various locations, Nagisa reached out and put a hand on one of his tentacles.
“Thank you for helping, Sensei.” He said, softly. “Remember, we’ll have those children safe soon.”
“I’m not certain ‘soon’ is soon enough, Nagisa-kun.” There was a low, angry timbre to the teacher’s voice, and his tentacles were roiling with anger. The one Nagisa had touched had stilled, though. “If it wouldn’t compromise your cover, I would rescue every one of them, tonight.” Steam exhaled from his mouth as he spoke the last word.
“Crime won’t be solved in a single night, Korosensei.” He reminded, not unsympathetically. “It’s on Ritsu’s agenda to help tip off the authorities about operations like these. In the meantime, might I suggest arranging poisonings or accidents for some of their captors? Something to disrupt their procedures enough to prevent bad things from happening until the arrests.”
It…didn’t exactly sit well with him, either. He had at his disposal a superbeing who would gladly remove every one of those children from danger within the hour, but because he needed a good cover story, he was delaying. It didn’t soothe him much to think that, without their intervention, these children would never be rescued at all. He was still allowing injustice to continue, if only for a short while.
He sighed, and deliberately moved on. “Considering the information you’ve brought, the one based here in Tokyo seems best.” As it happened, the organisation was loosely connected with certain individuals in the local Yakuza family, though what evidence there was quite clearly indicated efforts towards plausible deniability for both sides. It seemed likely that the traffickers would not receive Yakuza protection from the law if they ‘screwed up’, so it was a decent target.
There was also the fact that children taken by this ring were generally sold onto buyers or other traffickers…’untouched’, so to speak. Though there was certainly rough handling, it didn’t seem to go further than that in most cases. They also didn’t give the children any addictive drugs.
Nagisa considered the information he’d been given, and deemed the detail insufficient. “So, to begin with, what was the state of dress of most of the children?” He asked, settling in for a long interrogation. He had a lot of details to consider, after all.
It took a long time to exhaust everything he or Ritsu could think of, and Itona, who’d elected to stay for the talk, was looking quite uncomfortable. Korosensei himself was persistently black-skinned, steaming with rage, and occasionally slipped into a reverberating snarl of a voice that was really quite threatening. Karasuma didn’t seem much better, and was scowling more fiercely than Nagisa had ever seen before.
Nagisa pursed his lips, and turned to Karasuma. “I think you’d best help me with those bruises, sensei.” He said, firmly. The man glared, and Korosensei hissed like an angry snake, but in the end Karasuma nodded and Korosensei didn’t object. He stood and jerked his head in the direction of the escape stairs, both because it was away from Korosensei and because a simulated struggle likely wouldn’t be good for the furniture.
Unfortunately, Korosensei elected to follow. Itona was either not curious enough or too uncomfortable to do the same, so he stayed where he was.
“Korosensei, you may wish to avoid supervising this.” Ritsu advised from Nagisa’s phone as they headed downstairs. The superbeing merely shook his head and continued following, so, well. That was his choice.
Nagisa stopped in the concrete escape tunnel and considered what to do. “I think grab my forearms from behind, Karasuma-sensei.” He said, and turned to offer the arms in question. There was a foreboding silence before he heard the shift behind him, and then hands clamped down on his arms. Nagisa nodded, and then set to struggling with all his might.
In the end it was a slightly traumatised duo of teachers that took him back upstairs, and Nagisa was feeling quite guilty for putting them through it all. He had gained some nice hand-shaped bruises on his wrists though, as well as some knee bruises from being shoved on the ground, and a good hand-bruise on one shoulder. They caused a variable amount of pain; a couple of them had been selectively healed, and were less raw.
The rest of the day passed with miscellaneous preparation: between classes, Korosensei chose the most plausible location for him to ‘break’ from – a ground-floor room with a particularly decrepit and rusty pipe running up one wall, and a window only just big enough for someone Nagisa’s size to squeeze through. The glass was already cracked from some prior incident, and wouldn’t be implausibly difficult to shatter. Shortly before Nagisa’s official escape time, the pipe would appear to have been pulled from the wall by the occupant tied to it, and the window broken using the sole stool in the room. On the window’s glass shards, Nagisa’s blood would be placed, as well as some choice fabric and hair strands. Nagisa spent the prep time being mildly drugged, because it seemed that the children there were sedated with chloroform or rohypnol when unruly and it wouldn’t do to have no traces of it in his bloodstream.
The clothes Nagisa had been kidnapped in, incidentally also the ones he’d been sweating in for several days, were wiped over the room to collect some authentic grime and maybe even hairs and such, and it was into these that Nagisa changed when the preparations were nearly ready to go. He rubbed some more grime into his hair, got himself nice and unkempt, and then declared himself ready at close to midnight.
What this meant was that Korosensei took him (minus phone) to a nearby rooftop while he prepared the apparent escape room, leaving the rope and blood and hair and such inside the room while Nagisa removed a piece of a broken glass bottle he’d filched from Karasuma’s recycling when no one was looking. He successfully sliced his clothes and himself up with believable broken-window-crawling damage before Korosensei could return to protest, then waited.
“Nagisa-kun,” Korosensei hissed, very unhappy, when he came to see the blood seeping through pieces of ripped clothes. “That was not necessary.”
“Given the apparent escape route, I think it was.” Nagisa disagreed, handing over the bloodied glass. “Could you dispose of this somewhere non-incriminating, please?”
A little unsettlingly, Korosensei ate it, glass crunching between his teeth as his skin blackened further. Then he followed the plan, and set Nagisa a short distance from the house, where surely the occupants would be coming to investigate the ruckus soon. “I’ll be watching, Nagisa-kun.” He said, quiet and serious. “Good luck.” Then he vanished into the shadows of the night; not visible, but close by.
Nagisa took a deep breath, feeling the aches of the bruises and the sting of the cuts. Then, still dazed from the drugs and unsteady from the neural rewiring, he staggered with feigned desperation along the pre-planned route to either a helpful bystander or the police station – whichever came first.
Nagisa stumbled through darkened streets, watched over by his teacher, and settled breath by breath into the role he was to play.
---
End chapter.
Detailed chapter warnings: Some medical stuff, involving needles. Later, there is non-detailed discussion of child trafficking and illegal activities related to this, including drugging of children and abuse of children. Nagisa also causes himself physical harm to improve his cover, and convinces Karasuma to simulate a struggle to add some realistic bruises in.
Chapter notes: I let this carry on longer than my typical 7-8k as a ‘I took ages to write this’ bonus. Hope you enjoyed. Next chapter will involve Nagisa returning to the world and dealing the consequences of the cover he chose, and possibly some more interactions with various characters. We’ll see.
Also since it’s been ages since I updated I can’t quite remember what changes I’ve made to chapter 3, which will be going on ao3, so maybe read that to be sure of stuff. Also I’m currently somewhere with completely awful internet so if I make any posting mistakes I won’t be able to fix them with my customary speed.
Content notes: references are made in this chapter to events which only appear in the manga. Namely, the contents of one of Korosensei’s hideouts, which he uses as a sort of getaway where he can be a shameful slob without worrying about being a bad influence on 3-E.
#fic:fundamentals#assassination classroom#ansatsu kyoushitsu#fanfic#time travel#Nagisa Shiota#Autonomously Thinking Fixed Artillery#korosensei#my writing#my fanfic
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And yet, not any one person has the whole truth, and as a group they shall resolve things... very nice way you developed this sequence!
And in fact everyone has a share in the unhappy outcome for Greio. Although he’s wise enough not to cherish a grudge against people he has to work with. andantezen replied to your photo “Heskar: I hope you enjoyed your heroic deed and I hope even more this...”
I like how naive and happy she is and seems to be with her deed, and how Heskar puts her into perspective... that's why she is a soldier who has not fought many battles, I guess, and he is the commander!
Very true. Until her mother’s death, she’s seen warfare more as a sport than a matter of life and death. And I imagine one only entirely realizes the difference when facing real danger - but then it’s often too late. andantezen replied to your photoset “Hes: I think we’ve got to face it. These are some of Favin’s clothes,...”
bad news... but not necessarily. (and so, these are the famed poses!)
As I said, nobody was very compassionate about the guy being dead - including myself when I made these poses. Indeed I mainly wanted the sword to lie flat and the shirt to be visible. But then I’m always fascinated how my poses, which I usually make with a specific scene in mind, can assume so many different meanings in other Simblrs’ stories. andantezen replied to your photo “Mar: Anyway, you won’t get a sensible word out of her. Harokar: Any...”
this is so sad, but rings so true as to how it was... By the way, this whole sequence, their uniforms, the courtyard, the lighting... it's a marvel!
This has to be one of my favourite scenes - even if it’s an unpleasant one for the characters. Just after the scene where the squire said “They’re back”, my computer broke, so I had all December to ponder about the upcoming events. But it always was planned to be a very dramatic scene... Also I’m very glad I had this occasion to show Heskar&Harokar in their helmets; they suit them so perfectly, I think.
andantezen replied to your photo “Marsol: I’ve had the outpost watched – there was some coming and...”
all these tough decisions about life and death, while I'm comfortably seated in a chair reading about them... how life has changed over the centuries, at least for many of us... and it makes me wonder how it was back then, and what kind of man I would have been...
I often wonder about that, too. Not only for early Middle Ages, but for many eras. Sometimes at university I even feel a bit ashamed to be writing clever things about situations I might not even have survived five minutes in. andantezen replied to your photo “Marsol: You have informed Heskar and Harokar, haven’t you? Squire: Of...”
all the earthy tones... it's so beautiful!
It’s the photoshop-action, Jepensedoncjesims inspired me to make :) And I do love earthy tones, also in real life. andantezen replied to your photoset “How long have you been sitting here? … Valea?”
I was wondering if that was Val with her hair down... Her heart must ache, though she won't say a word about missing -- or being very worried about -- Favin, will she?
Yep, that’s her. And indeed, the only person she might have talked to is missing. andantezen replied to your photo “Nerena: I might at least have hit once! Greio: They were on the other...”
another beautiful scene with them... their feelings enhanced by each other.
That’s beautifully said! <3
andantezen replied to your photoset “Mar: Take the horse and follow me quickly! We can overtake them yet!”
That was a clever thing to do, wasn't it?
And it only worked because Valea taught the horse what everyone else considered a silly trick. andantezen replied to your photoset “Mar: Nothing to be done for him - we can pick him up later.”
Is someone missing? I wish we had more text in this sequence...
Favin is missing and Marsol got off his horse to check on the squire. The squire and his horse are dead.
This seems to have not turned out quite as clear as it was to me (you’re not the first to be confused...) These scenes with a lot of action but little conversation are a bit difficult in dialogue form. I tried a different approach in the next chapter.
andantezen replied to your photo
that's what I've thought -- archers could and should help, even from the other margin!
Although, as Greio said later, it wasn’t the safest thing to do (not that I know much about archery - I’ve got that detail from The Lord of the Rings :) andantezen replied to your photoset “Greio: But in fact I was happier than I’d ever been since I left the...”
each image is perfection, and I have to click them all to see them bigger... Those boys in the foreground and their conversation in the back... such a pretty scene, and I can almost hear what's being sung, told...
andantezen replied to your photo “Mar: When will they be back? Squire: I don’t know. That depends, I...”
they seem to be just boys, and already fighting -- and that's the way things were!
They are just boys - in their early teens, though few people knew their exact age back then. And even though it was normal in those times, that’s what’s continuously breaking Favin’s heart about his job. After all half the squires who stared at Greio at the beginning are dead by now. Apart from that, they’re very much inspired by my father’s students’ antics. andantezen replied to your photoset “Greio (narrator): I never found out what Favin told everybody else,...”
I love that image of Greio and Nerena, so intimate and peaceful. They do make a good match, don't they?
They do, but I always wonder if it would have worked out long-term.
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WEEKEND TV HOT FILM PICKS!
Check out my guide to the top films on TV this weekend, best of the rest and what to avoid at all costs. Enjoy!
LATE FRIDAY 24th NOVEMBER
HOT PICKS!
More4 @ 2100 Rush (2013) *****
You may see this film advertised on TV and think it’s not for you as you are not really a big fan of Formula 1…STOP. This film transcends a simple “sports film” and is a fantastic film for all. It’s a biography of F1 champion Nikki Lauda, specifically around the 1976 F1 season, focusing on the intense relationship between himself and arch rival James Hunt, we see the highs and the lows of one of the most competitive relationships in sporting history. Ron Howard has pulled out all the stops here and created something quite amazing, packed full of emotion, with characters you can really feel, combined with some of the best action facing sequences I’ve seen for a long time - Rush is a great success. Sit down, strap in and hold on tight.
Horror @ 0220 Let the Right One In (2008) *****
This is my favourite film of 2009 (UK release date). This amazing vampire drama from Sweden did suffer the indignity of a U.S remake “Let Me In” - but luckily they somehow pulled that one off - but here’s the original in all its glory. A thoroughly engrossing and touching film based on a superb book. Watch this! 5 Stars. It’s a dark love story set in Sweden. The bleak and snowy back drop compliments the pace and mood of the film. The sound, direction and acting are all perfect. I find it very difficult to find fault with any part of it. The relationship that is built between our two young lead actors is simply fascinating to watch, there’s so much realism. This is a tender and touching film but also subtly horrifying. The end of this film will stay with me for a long time. So much is said with so few words. It really leaves a mark on you. A truly great film.
Best of the rest:
TCM @ 2100 Kill Bill Vol 1 (2003) *****
C4 @ 0005 Boyhood (2014) *****
ITV3 @ 0030 The Theory of Everything (2014) ****
TCM @ 2310 Goodfellas (1990) *****
Film4 @ 2310 Aliens (1986) *****
***SO BAD IT'S GOOD!***
Film4 @ 0215 Piranha DD (2012) * SO BAD IT'S GOOD!
I expected awful and even potentially unwatchable. I saw the reviews and prepared myself that I could even be angry with how bad this film would be... but would you believe it, it's not as bad as the majority say. This is a B-Movie that knows exactly what it is, doesn't apologise and really doesn't care. It makes no attempt to cover up its shortcomings, it uses them to its advantage. Don't get me wrong, this film isn't great, it's not even good but it just about squeezes in enough gratuitous wobbling body parts, awful jokes, ridiculous death scenes and, most importantly, appearances from Gary Busey and David Hasselhoff to make this throw away comedy better than you've read about in the press. If everyone understood this films place as well as its makers did, I think it would get a little less horrendous panning.
***AVOID AT ALL COSTS!***
W @ 2100 Dark Shadows (2012) * AVOID AT ALL COSTS!
Dark Shadows marks a definitive end to my patience for the continuing dross being offered from the Burton / Depp camp. I fail to actually see who this film was supposed to be for. If it's for adults it's far too childish, if it's for kids there is far too much innuendo and sexual themes. I personally think it's was for Burton himself who seems to know he can somehow churn out whatever tickles his fancy and still get paid. Very disappointing indeed.
SATURDAY 25th NOVEMBER
HOT PICKS!
C4 @ 2100 Ex Machina (2014) *****
I can't believe this was Alex Garland's directorial debut. He was the writer on 28 days Later and Sunshine - so here's his directorial debut and it's unmissable. It's hard to even think this is his first film at the helm. The film oozes beauty in every shot - the clinical setting and awesome camera work produce some fantastic visuals in what is in essence a very tight and small set with 3 main characters in the most part. Ex Machina is one of the best Sci-Fi films to come out in recent years. It follows Domhnall Gleeson as Caleb, a 26 year old coder for the world’s largest internet company. He wins a competition to spend a week at the private mountain retreat of the company CEO - Nathan (Oscar Issac). Nathan is a recluse and the social interactions between the two are fascinating. Caleb finds out that he is to participate in an experiment interacting with the world’s first true artificial intelligence, housed in the body of a beautiful robot girl played by Alicia Vikander. This is true Sci-Fi. It could very easily be set right now. It's only a matter of time before one of the big players launch something truly stunning. Thought provoking, brilliantly story telling that keeps your eyes glued to each interaction and the wonderful script wraps its way right through you. It lingers long after the credits roll. Don't miss this. Look out for the trailer for his next step into Sci-Fi that I for one am very excited about… Annihilation.
Horror @ 2100 The Descent (2005) *****
The best British Horror film of the noughties. Neil Marshall’s superb Brit Shock Horror “The Descent” is chilling, creepy and full of suspense. It’s packed full of shocks, not just run of the mill cheap tricks, these are great shocks, perfectly timed with fantastic twists. This was just what the genre needed. It withstands multiple watches and has become a firm favourite of mine. If all else fails… Stick The Descent on.
A group of young women go on a caving expedition that goes horribly wrong and they soon become lost in an uncharted cave system. As panic escalates they come across some strange and very dangerous creatures. Here begins a fight for survival. This is a very accomplished Horror that excels in all aspects; the relatively unknown cast are all superb and help along the back story nicely. The cinematography is second to none, capturing all the awkward angles of the confined spaces as well as the vast open space of the caves; the story is wonderfully layered and is excellently told. This certainly is NOT a cheap teen horror. Neil Marshall hit our radar with his 2002 debut “Dog Soldiers” which was a lot of fun and showed a lot of talent, but in 2005, he had obviously honed his skills and produced this dark, bloody and claustrophobic Horror with a fantastic story line. It has some beautifully executed twists that will stick in your mind for a long while. From the very off this film is set at full speed and rarely lets up - every time your adrenalin begins to drop you are thrown back into heart stopping tension and fantastic frights that all add up to one of the great Horrors of modern times. If you like Horror… Love this.
Best of the rest:
Film4 @ 1300 Field of Dreams (1989) *****
ITV2 @ 1850 Inception (2010) *****
TCM @ 2100 Goodfellas (1990) *****
ITV4 @ 2300 Full Metal Jacket (1987) *****
SUNDAY 26th NOVEMBER
HOT PICKS!
Sony @ 1630 Another Earth (2011) ****
Through all the improbabilities and implausible ideas in this elaborate work of fiction, Mike Cahill brings us a subtle, affecting and intimate story that takes place as we discover another planet, another Earth, getting closer and closer to our planet. An exact replica. This huge and admittedly outrageous Sci-Fi concept is merely a sub plot to the main event - It is a story of how two people meet and how their relationship, forged through tragedy, grows.
Brit Marling, who not only co-wrote this film but it is also her fantastic debut in the lead role as Rhoda, turns this light weight, low budget story of a tragic relationship into a serious heavy weight contender. This is no doubt the start of a great career for her. I still haven't managed to catch her in the 2012 release Sound of My Voice which I'm very much looking forward to.
The film does raise a ton of unanswerable questions but sensibly chooses to stick to its guns and focus purely on Rhoda, her decisions and the reasons for the path she takes. This emotionally charged Indie Sci-Fi fascinates and mesmerises with its subtle, slow pace, mysterious soundtrack and affecting performances.
C5 @ 2100 Fury (2014) ****
There are plenty of war films with the same old formula, and this film does follow a rather formulaic approach, but here we focus solely on a U.S. Sherman tank crew. Not since the amazing Kelly’s Heroes had I seen a film focus on these tanks. A history lesson in itself for the ignorant and uneducated - the Nazi Tiger tanks they are up against completely and utterly out gun them and with armour so strong - the Sherman’s found it extremely difficult to stop them. Comparatively this film is nothing like the almost light hearted, satirically barbed Kelly’s Heroes, here we have a film attempting to capture the realism of war, the death, the squalor and the sheer inhumanity. It does this very well.
It’s dark, rich colour palette and beautifully framed cinematography certainly keep your eyes glued to the screen. The poor Sherman crews did not have much hope. We are taken deep inside the belly of “Fury” the Sherman tank with crew of 5 led by Don “Wardaddy” Collier played by Brad Pitt. Never before have I seen such oddly perfect hair styling in a war zone since Clint Eastwood’s barnet in Where Eagles Dare.
The claustrophobia of the tank is captured really well but it also somehow creates space with every odd angle when we see times where this crew felt secure in their new found home. The performances are the icing on the cake here with everyone pulling out performances to be very proud of. Not a film that will survive a re-watch mainly down to its bleakness, but never the less a film I am very pleased to have seen.
Film4 @ 2320 The Lincoln Lawyer (2011) ****
Before McConaughey did anything good at a time when mediocrity saturated his filmography with sub-standard Rom-Coms and Sahara… I hate Sahara…. Anyway - Here we see him in a fantastic role as (you guessed it) a lawyer who works out of the back of his car - a Lincoln… See what they did there! I’m a sucker for a good court room drama and this is certain one of those. Plenty of twists. Stand out McConaughey. Great supporting cast. Don’t miss it.
Sony @ 2320 Sunshine (2007) *****
It’s been a while since this has graced our TV schedule. Don’t miss Danny Boyle’s splendid venture into the space Sci-Fi genre: Sunshine. I love this film. It pulls from so many influences from Science Fiction greats such as Alien, 2001, and even Event Horizon. The film is set 50 years in the future, a team of astronauts are sent on a mission to reignite the dying sun. They are Earth’s last hope of survival.
Sunshine relies heavily on the quality of the cast to drive this through and they all do a sterling job. Particularly Cillian Murphy and Chris Evans. They all capture the essence of how 16 months cooped up in a confined space must make you feel. The mission takes a turn when they find the original lost ship from a failed mission in a decaying orbit around the sun. This is the beginning of a string of unfortunate and strange events that put not only their lives but their mission to save the world as well.
Boyle dishes out some seriously tense scenes and towards the end of the film it changes from Sci-Fi to Horror as certain things are revealed. Although not everyone welcomed these changes, I think they worked really well and it was a good twist ultimately carrying film to conclusion. Sunshine is a thrilling and very gripping Sci-Fi feast from a great British Director. A must see film.
Best of the rest:
ITV2 @ 1605 Despicable Me (2010) ***
Film4 @ 1705 The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992) *****
C4 @ 1805 Men In Black 3 (2012) ***
TCM @ 2100 The Day of the Jackal (1973) ****
Sony @ 2100 Unbreakable (2000) ****
***AVOID AT ALL COSTS!***
Film4 @ 2100 Cowboys & Aliens (2011) * AVOID AT ALL COSTS!
First off - Ignore the cast. You would wrongly assume that a film with Harrison Ford / Daniel Craig / Sam Rockwell / Olivia Wilde / Paul Dano / Walter Goggins & Clancey Brown would at least be slightly watchable. You would be wrong. It may as well have cast Hugh / Pew / Barney McGrew / Cuthbert / Dibble & Grub. Disjointed, Unentertaining, dull and horribly boring - Nothing stands out here. I haven’t felt this disappointed in a “Western” since Wild Wild West and I’m still angry about the sheer existence of that grot. Why was this film even made?? Maybe it’s a cover for something bigger, maybe Money Laundering!!? - filtering money through the stinking bowels of this “film”…Who knows… What I do know - AVOID AT ALL COSTS!
BBC2 @ 2240 John Carter (2012) * AVOID AT ALL COSTS!
What an unfortunately boring waste of a colossal budget. Slap-dash, hurried and choppy story with some ludicrous ideas. We’ve seen enough special effects to now not be simply wow-ed by that alone. John Carter looks good but bored the hell out of me. AVOID!
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BANK HOLIDAY WEEKEND TV HOT FILM PICKS!
Check out my guide to the top films on TV this extended Easter weekend and the best of the rest! Friday through to Monday. Enjoy!
GOOD FRIDAY 14th APRIL
HOT PICKS!
C4 @ 0055 Spring Breakers (2012) *****
I originally took the opportunity to see Spring Breakers with very little knowledge of what type of film it would be. I know nothing of Harmony Korine’s other work. I was in a unique situation. I came into this film unbiased and without expectation. What I encountered was something very interesting indeed. I’ve seen this film over four times now - and on my most recent viewing I can confidently confirm it holds up extremely well indeed, in fact better than the first.
Spring Breakers is almost dreamlike in its direction. On my original viewing I quickly began to realise this film wasn’t the standard film I thought I had walked into. With its repeated dialogue, snappy chronology jolts, slow motion, hazy fades, repeated gunshot sounds, electric colour scheme and whispering voice overs this film maker has obvious talent. I was almost in a trance watching it and immediately wanted to watch it again as soon as it finished so I could pick up on all the wonderful bits I had missed. The re-watch allowed me to pick up on so much more.
Through this hazy neon saturation come a lot of darkness. As the film progresses and we cleverly see various scenes through different perspectives and the darkness becomes all consuming. I particularly like the way towards the very end of the film the girls almost disappear into the darkness if it wasn’t for their neon bikinis and unicorn crested pink balaclavas. So many scenes of merit to mention but I can’t go without mentioning the montage of slow motion violence backed by a strange rendition of a Brittany Spears pop song played on a grand piano by Alien as the bikini and balaclava clad girls dance around toting automatic weapons… It certainly is a strange sentence to type, but the scene works so perfectly.
Another important reason this film succeeds is down to the increasingly impressive and versatile, James Franco. He plays Alien, the gold toothed, drug dealing, corn rowed gangster. He balances completely over the top and creepily concerning very well indeed. A character so larger than life that any other actor choice could have ruined the entire flow and feel of the film.
Spring Breakers really surprised me and I now know it definitely withstands multiple watches and as suspected I immediately bought it. I hope this film does as well as it deserves. It will no doubt stay at the top end of my best films of 2013 (UK) for some time.
Film4 @ 0110 The Big Lebowski (1998) *****
The Coen Brothers greatest achievement. Stylish, hilarious with an insane story line and some of the most memorable characters in modern film. A brilliant film and Jeff Bridges as The Dude is one of my favourite characters of all time. “Careful Man! There’s a Beverage Here!”
Best of the rest:
5* @ 1105 Labyrinth (1986) ****
C5 @ 1305 Ben-Hur (1959) *****
Film4 @ 1500 The Muppet Christmas Carol (1992) *****
TCM @ 1600 Bullitt (1968) ****
TCM @ 1815 The Hunt for Red October (1990) ****
ITV2 @ 1925 The Lord of the Rings: The Fellowship of the Ring (2001) *****
Gold @ 1935 Ace Ventura: Pet Detective (1994) ****
BBC2 @ 2100 Selma (2014) ****
Film4 @ 2250 High-Rise (2015) ****
ITV4 @ 2320 The Deer Hunter (1978) *****
BBC1 @ 2345 Anchorman: The Legend of Ron Burgundy (2004) ****
ITV3 @ 0110 Elizabeth: The Golden Age (2007) ****
SATURDAY 15th APRIL
HOT PICK!
TCM @ 1040 Bullitt (1968) ****
This fantastic cop thriller has been somewhat overshadowed by its fame for the glorious car chase scene, but it really shouldn’t be, Bullitt is an intelligent, focused and realistic crime drama with well-placed action and suspense. With Steve McQueen pulling out an understated but wholly credible role as Lieutenant Frank Bullitt he lifts this already great film to higher ground. As I have filled my recent film viewing with CGI heavy spectaculars full of clunky exposition and sacrificing script for mass glitzy destruction sequences, it was an absolute pleasure to return to the films I love. Films with intelligence, perfect sound tracks, with tone and mood matched perfectly to the story they are telling, realism, impressive live action scenes with no CGI… Bullitt certainly fits the bill.
Best of the rest:
TCM @ 1255 Casablanca (1942) *****
Film4 @ 1300 Home Alone (1990) *****
ITV1 @ 1320 The Secret of my Succe$s (1987) ***
C4 @ 2100 The Imitation Game (2014) ****
Sky1 @ 2100 The Hunt for Red October (1990) ****
Film4 @ 2100 X-Men: First Class (2011) ****
TCM @ 2100 Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan (1982) ****
TCM @ 2325 The Exorcist (1973) *****
EASTER SUNDAY 16th APRIL
HOT PICKS!
Syfy @ 2100 The Adjustment Bureau (2011) ****
Mixed reviews on this one but I loved the elaborate plot concept in this 2011 fantasy thriller. Matt Damon is a politician who becomes instantly fascinated with a woman he has a chance encounter with, as they attempt to explore their friendship there appears to be mysterious forces around every corner intent on keeping them apart. The main strength of this film is the characters. The relationship and emotion between Matt Damon and Emily Blunt’s characters is palpable - They really do a very good job at portraying two strangers with an obvious desire for each other. They keep the audience fully interested and with an action film sensibilities - the pace and structure of the film keep you on the edge of your seat. This is almost like a Rom-Com but with less of the com and more of the bizarre. It’s very worthy of a space on your TV +box. Hit record.
Spike @ 2100 Apocalypse Now (1979) *****
A lot of big budget war films are glossy and tidy and quite removed from the time and place that the events took place in - Apocalypse Now is not one of those films - this film captures the madness and chaos perfectly. It’s peculiar and almost dream like qualities highlight the disorientation and madness of war. This is Francis Ford Coppola’s greatest achievement. With equally amazing cinematography thanks to Vittorio Storaro this film showcases the very best of everyone. Martin Sheen is fantastic here as Captain Benjamin Willard - one of his best performances. The supporting cast is seriously fame heavy and live up to their past accomplishments well. Apocalypse Now is more of an experience than a film. One of my favourite war films.
Syfy @ 2310 Strange Days (1995) *****
Strange Days is a seriously underrated Sci-Fi film. Written by James Cameron and Directed by Kathryn Bigelow this film certainly has the right credentials. It’s packed full of some really stunning action sequences, the story has great depth and an intelligent entry into the Sci-Fi genre. Although made in 1995 and with a story set 2 days before the millennium, it still has a very fresh feel. For fans of Sci-Fi this is a serious must see… For everyone else, the same applies, it really is that good. Ralph Fiennes is brilliant as the morally questionable ex-cop turned hustler, Lenny Nero. The POV shots in this film are masterfully put together. Engaging, action packed and full of thrills. Don’t miss this.
Best of the rest:
TCM @ 1050 Casablanca (1942) *****
TCM @ 1255 Singin' in the Rain (1952) *****
E4 @ 1500 We Bought a Zoo (2011) ***
Film4 @ 2100 Bridesmaids (2011) ***
ITV4 @ 2105 The Dirty Dozen (1967) ****
C4 @ 0100 Kingpin (1996) ***
EASTER MONDAY 17th APRIL
HOT PICKS!
Comedy @ 1101 Fantastic Mr. Fox (2009) *****
It has hit my Hot Pick spot so many times I’ve lost count but what better way to ignore the impending Doom of Monday and kick off Sunday evening than Wes Anderson’s amazing stop motion animated success: Fantastic Mr. Fox. Expertly scripted, clever and quirky, Fantastic Mr. Fox is “cuss-ing” brilliant. Funny and accessible for all ages with a soundtrack that is spot on, you get everything you have come to expect for a Wes Anderson film - it all just works together quite perfectly. The usual big names help bring Anderson’s script to life, especially Clooney and Schwartzman.
Mr. Fox, his wife, son and nephew’s lives take a dangerous turn when Mr. Fox’s animal instincts turn him to crime as he takes on 3 farmers for their stock and they stop at nothing to catch him. It’s cool, quirky and everything you love from a Wes Anderson film. Whether you’re a fan of his films or watching for the first time, this is a great bit of entertainment.
I always thought this deserved the Oscar for Best animated feature in 2009 but was pipped at the post by Pixar’s “Up”. Bizarrely my mom won’t watch this film as she thinks it’s strange that foxes are wearing clothes - but if you can get past that - you’re in for a treat.
BBC1 @ 2030 Guardians of the Galaxy (2014) *****
The more times I watch Guardians of the Galaxy the more I love it. This is an action romp that withstands multiple watches through its amazing visuals and splendid vein of comedy that gets me laughing out loud every single time. Chris Pratt is Star Lord who gets involved in a lot more than he bargained for when an artefact he had acquired turned out to be a weapon of world destruction. As his enemies get closer, trouble lurks around every corner, things start to turn sour and before you know it you're a passenger on a crazy adventure with five unlikely friends working together to save the Galaxy from a blue faced bully with a serious case of mascara run.
It's pretty darn good on 3D Blu Ray. It certainly lends itself to the 3D treatment bringing the outstanding visuals to life. Its success is simple... A great mix of characters oozing interesting back stories begging to be told, it's genuinely funny with some excellent comedy timing from Pratt who was destined to play this character, an uber cool soundtrack full of greats that everyone will love. It doesn't do anything wrong.
It rolls along at such a pace there's still plenty left under explored but there was no time to dawdle, Guardians goes straight for its guns and fires on all cylinders until the credits roll. This is definitely up there as one of my favourite Marvel films. I'm already looking forward to watching it again with plenty more to learn about our characters I'm itching for the sequel.
Best of the rest:
Film4 @ 1655 Paddington (2014) ****
TCM @ 2320 The Running Man (1987) ****
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