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𝐡𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝 𝐬𝐞𝐞𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐜𝐫𝐲
pairing: yandere satoru gojo x chubby reader
summary: at the beginning gojo made your life hell when he first sees you because you won't give him attention. then it all changes, he just hated seeing you cry and he'll use all his resources and power to love you and spoil you
word count: 14.7k words
a/n: okay okay! i'm back! with something incredibly longer compared to every other oneshot i've written. i started this before gojo's birthday but it just kept getting longer and longer, then came the holidays and then i got ill too but it's finally finished, yay! i hope you all enjoy this and of course like always make sure you read the warnings before reading x
content warnings: gojo is a yandere!! friends to lovers, hints of stalking, gojo manipulates everyone, mentions of breeding, fingering, rough unprotective sex, cumming inside, gojo calls her 'silly girl' in his head and thinks she thinks to much (kind of like 'you don't need to think or make decisions or earn money because i can do that for you'), dirty talk, dumbification, objectification(?), submissive reader, dominant gojo, petnames: princess, sweetheart, (good girl) (if i've missed anything please let me know because it's very possible with 14.7k words - mdni / 18+
everyone flocks to satoru gojo, girls and guys alike, they want his attention, if only for a second, and want to be noticed by him. he's the beating heart to every social situation, with an ability to draw every single eye in the room on him, feeding off the spotlight and admiration. whatever he wants he gets it, he has since he was a young child so why are you being so difficult?
there's not many who he considers his equal, if he had to pick out one it would be his best friend from childhood suguru geto, two families telling their children to talk to the other in hopes to form more connections. gojo remembers to this day being five years old dressed up in a suit that was too stuffy for any five year old to wear, taken to a party with his parents. everywhere he looked there were elites and politicians, anyone and everyone with power. he remembers the nudge his mother gave him towards suguru's direction, telling her son to make friends. others at the university are lesser than him, but they're entertaining for a short duration, before he gets bored of them and tosses them away for someone else, that is.
then there's the nobodies, the lowest of the low. uninteresting in every way possible with nothing to offer him, nothing to pique his interest and in terms of satoru gojo you're a typical nobody but even the nobodies look his way when they think people won't notice. even the really shy ones or the stubborn ones who always say how much they despise how everyone adores him will momentarily glimpse in his direction when they think no one's looking.
but you... you look right past him, and it pisses him off. do you think you're better than him? even people in long term relationships eyes drift to him, most would break up with their partner for just one night with him. this 'most' mainly means all, everyone wants a chance to be with the man whose sexual escapades are spoken about frequently in such a high regard.
it's not like you don't know about his existence, you do, but you want to keep yourself to yourself. even your closest friends talk about the famous satoru gojo but he gives you the shivers for some reason. you've never spoken to him and you don't intend to, even if it's everyone's dream, it's not yours, something's just not quite right about him. you live in completely different worlds, different universes, and you prefer to dream about things more realistic, maybe dragons and flying saucers on occasion but never satoru gojo. not only is associating with him unrealistic but just the thought of him makes you shudder. he's too cocky, too self-assured, too arrogant, too loud, too... attractive, it doesn't seem right that someone would look that good. it's like he's hypnotised everyone bar you.
first it's irritation when he notices your behaviour, it's clear when you're acting the complete opposite to everyone, then it's anger when he sees you pay attention to someone that isn't him. something must be wrong with you if you're laughing at a joke that he didn't make, a joke told by another nobody, not just a nobody but someone a year younger. his actions are fuelled by his anger and his annoyance towards you. he makes sure every friend and acquaintance you have stops talking to you, it's easy really. all those so called 'friends' leave you alone after 'overhearing' hushed voices talk about how gojo's more likely to talk to someone when they're not friends with someone who's like you. it was easy to orchestrate it, all he needed was two girls who constantly fawn over him, perfect for doing his bidding.
"gojo never talks to yumehara, even though she tries so hard."
"yeah, it's because she's friends with moriyama. associating with someone like her is a no-go."
"moriyama?"
"yeah, you know that girl in class a, the one who thinks she's better than everyone and doesn't care about gojo."
you now sit by yourself and walk the corridors alone- easy. if he was more sympathetic towards you he'd almost feel bad that all of your friends would stop talking to you so readily.
next was your grades. the gojo family funds the university meaning that he had much more power than the average person, even more than people who also come from wealthy families. professors know it's in their best interest not to get on the bad side of the heir of the gojo family, not just for the university's sake but for themselves as well. one wrong move and they'll be fired, blacklisted throughout town unable to get a job. one wrong move and the university could lose all their funding. he wields more power than the headmaster.
you already get average grades, typically b's and occasionally c's but if he plays his cards right he knows he can lower those c's another extra grade down to an f and he knows just who to start with. professor iura: a man in his mid-thirties who's respected by all and he knows you like him. he's been told you try extra hard in his class, taking double the amount of notes in his lectures than you ordinarily do. he knows getting an f in his class first would be more hurtful than over all the other classes.
"professor iura don't you think the girl who wrote the paper on-" he stops mid sentence, what did you write about again?- "something so boring it hasn't even sunk in. i remember everyone else's but not hers." he only remembers his own and there was never any reason to see what a nobody like you wrote about.
the professor's eyebrows furrow before quickly schooling his expression back to impassive. satoru has used his influence before but iura's never heard about him using it as payback for whichever poor soul's caught his ire. "who is it?" iura thought you deserved an a this time, it's disappointing that he'll have to give you an f.
all these things start stacking up and you feel like the universe is against you, you don't understand your sudden drop in grades or why your friends won't talk to you. you do your best to put on a brave face but you feel alone, you have no one to turn to, you don't understand why everyone gives you the cold shoulder and why they pretend you don't exist, your facial expression dropping when someone ignores you for the umpteenth time. you don't understand how your water always seems to spill in your bag all over your things even though you swear you've put on the lid securely, screwing the lid on the bottle so tightly your hands suffer the consequence, almost raw, from how tight you've tried to make it. you can't afford to buy another textbook and you don't have enough time to rewrite your essay.
you don't understand how things go missing every time you look away. you glance to the window when you see a falling leaf, burnt orange and crimson red litter the floor outside. autumn is so beautiful, a season of harvest and abundance but it's a reminder to you that nothing lasts forever, leaves fall and people leave. people talk about how autumn is maturing but omits the melancholy idea that it's just growing old, that burnt oranges and crimson reds are just rotting on the ground. your whole world is rotting with every second, the universe has it out for you and by the time you look back into the room your pen is missing.
gojo takes pleasure from seeing your face at these times, that puzzled look and biting your lip in frustration as you've lost another pen or that pout when your friend ignores you, he thinks it looks pretty on you. not that he'd ever admit that of course.
his pleasure twists though, into a new emotion- a darker emotion. you got another f and you look... sad... distraught. satoru enjoys seeing your pout when something goes wrong for you, he thinks it's pretty but he's watching you like a hawk right now, he can't take his eyes off you, he can tell you're trying desperately to hold it all together but you can't stop your eyes from welling up, it's impossible to stop your waterline brimming with tears, overflowing like a broken tap, hot tears running down your face, you attempt to quickly wipe your tears away with the back of your sleeve in hopes that nobody has seen but it's too late for that. he thought he would take pleasure in seeing you cry but instead it's pure rage. even though he's the one that's convinced all of your professors to give you f's, all he feels is fury for them making you cry. he doesn't want you to cry, he wants to keep you safe, wants to make you all his.
in the following weeks professors leave the university without announcing it to students. leaving studies and classes in a limbo for awhile. not just the professor who made you cry is gone but also iura and several others.
with that limbo period came more group projects to fill in the space of the lack of lectures. a 'little' push from satoru to higher ups and you were paired up together, leaving you no choice to spend time together and have your first conversation with each other. at this point he needed to be near you. you sit across from each other after class and you introduce yourself to each other, even though you both know who the other is, you didn't expect him to know you and he acts like he doesn't. "oh i know you, i really liked your last paper. you got an f, right? i can't believe that, it was the best one." after all your friends avoiding you and all those f's getting validation makes you shyly smile, your cheeks feel warm and you're starting to understand why people like him.
things start to change after that. your f's go back to normal and people are kinder, with everything going back to normal satoru makes sure you're still alone though, makes sure your friends continue not to talk to you. he's the only one that's allowed to do that. your friends still don't spend time with you, instead gojo does and honestly you don't mind that change, you appreciate that change, you don't know what happened with your friends but you like how gojo doesn't dismiss your emotions and opinions like they used to do.
you previously had that inkling that something was wrong with him but his easygoing smiles and playful words make you enjoy your time with him and his once overconfidence that you always used to observe which once bothered you now makes your heartbeat go crazy in your chest, like marching drums hammering away against your ribcage.
satoru notices this change in you and he takes advantage of it. this change doesn't make him lose interest in you, maybe if you were someone else it would but not with you, if anything it makes him more interested because he learns more and more without you, some with your consent and knowledge others without it. he thinks you look so cute when you smile and he loves hearing you laugh. he never really liked music but he's listened to all those music and songs you share to the world like the ones you love that you play in cars and talk to people about them, plus the more secret ones hidden in your likes and private playlists. he loves the things you do that you don't realise you're doing, the soft sighs you make when you put on a warm coat when it's cold or the hums when you drink a hot drink. how you bite your pen when you're deep in thought and linger by the door before leaving the house and locking up, mentally checking you have everything you need with you. the little moans you make when you eat something that you love, at those times satoru has to restrain himself from kissing you. he loves it all. he loves you.
you see each other whenever possible and if you can't you'll be texting, he'll send you emoji's at the end of messages that you don't understand the context to and will send you selfies and photos of cats he's seen while around town.
after the first few times at the library you tend to see each other at café because they're more relaxed and you can talk as loud as you want to. he starts paying for your lunch whenever you're together, you always used to insist to pay yourself but after the first few times you relented, he could buy you breakfast, lunch and dinner everyday for the rest of your life yet it still wouldn't make a dent in his wallet. not only does he buy you lunch now but it's much more extravagant then you could afford for yourself.
you're walking together past a store front window and gojo sees something that catches his eye, stopping where he is and pulling on your sleeve to stop you too. "look at this!"
your eyes scan the window not knowing what he's talking about, all of them are designer clothes but none of them are men's. "what are we looking at gojo?"
he grins and points to a blouse, "that would look so good on you, you'd look so cute!" 'doubtful' you think. you scoff, that is a cute blouse but no way. "hey, what was that for? it's true." he insists.
"i don't even need to go in there to see that it's way out of my price range, plus designer brands like that never have my size anyway."
"you didn't say you didn't like it."
"me liking or not liking it isn't the point."
you carry on the rest of your day like it didn't happen and you forget about the whole thing. gojo doesn't.
all of gojo's fans start to get jealous of you, it's been over three months, the limbo period is over and new people have been hired, group projects are finished but you still spend all your days together. his previous relationships have been no more than eye candy only lasting a couple weeks yet you don't even seem to be dating so why is he always smiling when you talk and is walking you everywhere. they can't comprehend it, you're a nobody.
satoru loses it one day. you've gone to hand in your library book, it's overdue and you had forgotten about it, you needed it for when you and gojo were working together but you forgot all about it. gojo's waiting outside for you, you know the librarian likes you more so you've told him it's better if you go on your own, he knows that isn't true but as long as the librarian is kind to you he won't intervene. 'if the librarian knows what's good for her she'll let it go and not upset you.'
someone gojo vaguely recognises as a cheerleader who suguru slept with a few times spots him and goes over to him, leaning against him and pushing her breasts up against him. it disgusts him. "what are you doing here gojo? don't tell me that friend of yours is making you wait for her." she says in a sickly sweet voice and his eye twitches. he doesn't reply, she should get the idea and leave. "if i were her i'd never do that. why don't you come hang out with me? me and my friends are having a party later we'd love it if you'd come. normally i wouldn't come up to you so boldly but i think i'd be able to show you a good time, not like that girl you're always spending time with, you're so out of her league." she runs her hand along his arm but he grabs it tightly making her wince.
"don't ever fucking talk about her again," gojo responds coldly. he squeezes tighter and she yelps. he lets go of arm and pushes her away, almost in revulsion that he touched her. she stumbles and leans against the wall, looking shocked. at that time you push open the door with a relieved look on your face. satoru ignores the girl, acting like she doesn't exist, he smiles brightly at you. "everything okay?"
"yeah, she was surprisingly very understanding," you return his smile and shut the door behind you. when you shut the door you see the girl leaning against the wall staring at gojo and you wonder why. you've seen lots of gojo's fans but none of them have looked at him like that. you turn your attention back to gojo, not really wanting to engage with the girl if you can help it, you've never seen her before but you can tell that she's someone who would make your life hell if you knew each other as teenagers. "is everything okay?" you ask him, vaguely gesturing to her.
he grins and strolls towards you lifting up his sunglasses and lifting up your chin to look at him, forcing you to make eye contact and in doing so you get flustered and frazzled. gojo would sometimes put his arm over your shoulder when your walking together or grab hold of you quickly from behind unexpectedly, making you jump but this is the first time it's ever been so intimate. it's also rare for you to see gojo without his sunglasses on. "everything's fine." he grins and pats your head jokingly making you glare and pout. he snickers as he sees your reaction and lets go of your chin, slinging his arm over your shoulder.
"alright, if you say so, but for lunch i'm getting extra for that, i'm not some pet." you grumble and walk off together. satoru's mind flashes with images with you on your knees, 'i think she'd make a good pet. maybe i should buy her a collar.' he snickers again and you look at him with a raised eyebrow, "what's so funny?"
"nothing," he smirks. as you walk away he turns back around to look at the girl still standing there paralysed and glares hard at the girl. normally people would be swooning when they see his bright blue eyes like the clearest spring days but not right now, they'd all be wrong, his eyes aren't clear like any warm day they're frozen over and icy, with flecks of white and all that girl feels is despair and dread. he looks at her so cruelly, it makes her unable to move- frozen in place.
you haven't seen gojo for the last few days, it's the longest you've gone without seeing him since you became friends. even if you've both been busy previously gojo makes sure to have seen you, even if it's only for a minute, but you've both been too busy. gojo has had basketball practise in the day and in the night his family demands his attendance whilst discussing family affairs and you on the other hand have been busy studying, wanting to make sure you don't get any f's again. you don't realise you won't though, everything could be incoherent with each other word being spelled terribly and you'd never get an f again, gojo's made sure of that. he won't let anyone make you cry again.
you rhythmically tap your fingers, fidgeting on the table where your laptop and textbooks are, 'i want to see him.' satoru's scored another goal, this time a three point line goal, normally he goes for slam dunks but as long as he's the one scoring it doesn't really bother him. he's got a big game coming up and you're going to be there, you're going for him, you've never been to any of the games before, not having any real interest in the sport but now your friend is the star player so you're not going to miss any games. he'll score every single point his team makes so your eyes have no option but to focus on him and after the match you'll compliment him. the coach asks him something but it's all white noise to him, 'i miss her.'
you get a text on the fourth day of not seeing him and when you read the message you smile so wide your face becomes sore. 'the last few days have been so long without you! i know we normally go out for lunch but do you want to go for dinner?'
you don't hesitate responding, 'i'd love too!'
'i'll pick you up an hour before our reservations, i've brought you something.'
'reservations? did you plan tonight? and what's this about buying me something? you already pay for my lunch.'
'i've pulled some strings xoxo see you tonight.' you scowl when you read that he's blatantly ignored your comment about buying you something and if he's went out his way to pull some strings for this meal it must be more than a fast food drive-thru or the equivalent. you didn't really expect him to take you somewhere where you can eat in your car or it's acceptable to wear a three day old top and a hoodie that is a little too small but for him to go to the effort of pulling strings this must be a sophisticated place.
half an hour later you hear your phone again, multiple messages being sent one after another, five buzzes. 'shit.' 'I FORGOT' 'i forgot to send a time!' 'i'll see you at 6.' 'pretend this never happened.' you cover your face with your phone and giggle.
by six you're ready, it's taken you longer to get ready then you'd like to admit but you wanted to look pretty, it would be embarrassing to underdress. compared to gojo anything you or any 'normal' person would wear looks cheap in comparison to all his designer clothes but you spent hours making sure it would be suitable.
it's ten past six when you hear a knock on the door. opening it you see gojo in all his glory, his attractiveness on full display and his wealthiness showing, wearing an all black giorgio armani suit with a white shirt underneath, his sunglasses look different than normal, fancier, you think you can make out a ray-ban logo. he's wearing a rolex watch which is more than double your monthly rent. his hair looks shorter than the last time you saw him, he must of had a haircut in the last few days. it's obvious the way your eyes linger on him, checking him out and gojo grins as you unknowingly fuel his pride and ego.
"awe, you look so cute princess," gojo says playfully, smirking. princess- the first time he had called you that you malfunctioned, your eyes had widened and you forgot to breath. no one else has ever called you a term of endearment before and you didn't expect your friend, satoru gojo, to be saying it. you didn't ask why he called you it, why would you? it made your fingertips tingle and the inside of your chest to warm up. "can i come in?" you nod your head and move to the side to give him enough room to come in and close the door after him. "you really do look beautiful," he says gently, you don't think you've ever heard him speak so tenderly before.
"you look good too gojo, you always do but- but tonight as well," you tell him, bashfully smiling. he grins and his eyes gleam with glee at the genuine compliment. he loves when you compliment him, it feels different than the vapid ones others offer him, even if you compliment him with only a few words it means a greater deal.
behind his back he's carrying a sleek black box with a scarlet red chiffon ribbon wrapped around it in a bow containing his gift to you, your eyes narrow when he hands it too you, although your voice is soft and quiet when you say, "it's not my birthday gojo, why are you buying me things? you don't have to do that," your voice gets quieter with each word spoken.
gojo takes your hand in his and places the box in your hand. "i can buy you things because i can. i have enough money and i want to spend it on you," he tells you firmly and your stomach flutters with butterflies but you don't know why, his hand is awfully soft maybe that's why your heart is racing or maybe it's because he spoke to you firmly like there's no room for arguments. gojo cups your cheek with his unoccupied hand and strokes it, your whole body melts at the action, "just open it 'kay?"
you nod your head and hum, relenting- just like you did when he began paying for your lunch. you delicately unwrap the bow, not wanting to ruin the box, and open it, you didn't know what to expect, you could of been given a hundred guesses and a hundred days to guess what he brought you and you still would have no clue. you pause as you open up the lid, your heart skips a beat and it's almost as if the air was stolen from your lungs like deflated balloons as you breathlessly say, "satoru! what's this?" inside the box is the blouse you were looking at all those weeks ago, the one you said was too expensive, the one you said would never fit.
'satoru' it's the first time you've ever called him by his given name and it sounds so angelic coming from your lips that he's forgotten to breathe, everything pausing and not moving. "do you like it?" he finally asks.
you nod your head in an almost daze, you're in awe that he'd really give you something so beautiful, that he would go out of his way to buy it. "i- i don't deserve this gojo."
he steps closer to you, "uh uh, what's with calling me gojo again?"
your eyes widen as you realise that only a second ago you called him by his given name, "oh! i'm so sorry! i was just in shock, i didn't mean to call you that gojo," you ramble.
he smoothed out the wrinkles of his forehead rubbing it with his fingers, which is currently caused because he finds your lack of awareness disconcerting. "that isn't what i meant princess, i want you to call me satoru. i want to give this to you."
"oh... okay," you're quiet and you've pressed your lips together to stop yourself from smiling. it won't be hard to start calling him satoru, you already call him satoru in your head. after a long pause of you trying to put your thoughts all together you start speaking again, "are you sure about this satoru? this is bound to be expensive, right? it's- it's ralph lauren isn't it? isn't this too expensive too be spending on me." gojo has to hide a smirk at that, 'has she forgotten how rich i am?' "and, and i don't want you to think that i want to spend time with you because you have money or anything!" 'ah she's adorable, i could just cancel our reservations and have her on her knees the whole night to say thank you for the blouse... i couldn't do that though, not right now... if i don't see her in that blouse in the next five minutes i'll go insane.'
"of course i'm sure about this princess, i know you'd never spend time with me for clothes from ralph lauren." he resists the urge to pull you in by your waist and kiss you, he doesn't want to overwhelm you, not at this moment.
you take the blouse out of the gift box and hold it out in front of you, there's a twinkle in your doe eyes as you look at it in wonder, knowing that this is yours, whispering, "pretty," it's barely audible. "wait, i didn't think this store went up to my size? did you go to a different store? and... how do you know my size." you ask him confused.
"i have my ways," he answers and winks at you, you scoff at the wink and narrow your eyes.
"seriously satoru," you press him. 'ah she could ask me anything and i'll tell her if she keeps calling me satoru.' "actually i know you know my size from when you've seen my coats and jumpers lying around but-" 'oh yeah... that's totally how i know...' "- how did you get it in my size?"
"annoyingly they don't actually make that particular blouse in your size... how ridiculous is that, sadly i don't have enough money and connections to make them ruined and bankrupt." he says nonchalantly, casually waving his arm around. you bark out a laugh thinking that he was joking. he wasn't. if even one article of clothing isn't made in your size it should only be fair for the brand to lose all their money and reputation, no matter what the brand is.
"hold up how do i have this if it doesn't come in my size?" you cock your head to the side quizzically and for the second time gojo thinks about buying you a collar, maybe with a matching lead...
he grins and flicks his eyes back and forth between your face and the blouse you're holding up. "obviously i got it custom made,"
"that's- that's obvious?!" you splutter and he laughs.
"obviously." he reiterates, enjoying your reaction- dumbstruck and lips parted in near disbelief.
"it'll take us thirty minutes to get to the restaurant princess and our reservations in about forty minutes." he lets you know and you snap out of your stupor.
"i'll just get my bag."
"hang on!" satoru rushes out before you can leave to get your bag. "you look beautiful right now princess but don't you want to see how that blouse looks on you?" you shift your weight from side to side, heat rising to your cheeks. 'do i really have time to get changed? i spent so long choosing this outfit too.' before you can say something gojo stops you, not wanting to give you an opportunity to say no or think to hard about it. he wants you to do it, you don't have to have an opinion on the matter, leave that him. sometimes you can't be trusted when it comes to these things. "come on princess, i'm the one who brought you it. just wear it, please. i want to make sure it fits properly."
you yield, "okay let me go get changed."
satoru smirks, 'good girl.'
as you come back out of the bedroom adrenaline bursts through his veins. you twirl around, pausing when you circle back round to gojo and picking up the hem of your skirt playfully with one hand and doing a half curtsy, it's such a happy coincidence that the blouse pairs so well with the skirt you're already wearing, "how do i look?" 'beautiful, stunning, breathtaking, ethereal.'
"perfect," he replies dreamily and you giggle, thinking he isn't being serious and is exaggerating.
"i'm serious satoru," you tell him, it was meant to sound firm and like you won't back down until you get an answer but it just turned out sounding a little whiny.
gojo smirks and leisurely saunters to you, stopping when coming up close in front of you, "you look truly beautiful sweetheart." 'sweetheart' he's never called you that before. you don't know if your heart can keep taking it all. satoru's your friend, your close friend, but at times like this it's hard to remember that.
you bite your lip to stop yourself from smiling- admittedly unsuccessfully. the corners of your mouth still quirk up and your round cheeks become more predominate. you fight the desire to cover your face with your hands in embarrassment, instead opting to twiddle your fingers. "sh-should we get going?"
satoru grins at you, "sure thing."
the whole drive you're both stealing looks at each other when you can get away with it while making small talk and satoru's not letting you know where you're going saying that it's a surprise. whenever there's a red light gojo takes his time to admire you and as you step outside into the night you're astonished at the restaurant in front of you. satoru's handing his car keys to a valet to park his car but you're distracted from that, finally knowing where you're eating tonight. you know this place, well you know of this place. never in a million years would you have thought you'd be dining here, it's so lavish that the cutlery is more expensive than buying a house that's already furnished. "are you okay princess?" you snap out of your daze and nod your head. "alright then, let's go inside."
you follow closely behind gojo, nervous as you enter, you don't think you've ever felt more out of place. satoru doesn't even give his name, the man at the desk recognises him straight away, "ah mr. gojo if you'd follow me." the man leads you upstairs and you hear him asking satoru questions but all that's going through your mind is 'please don't trip, please don't trip.' you're quite accident prone and falling down these stairs would be too much to handle. he takes you all the way to the fourth floor and near the window where you can see the city lights shining below. "here you are."
when the man leaves satoru pulls out a chair for you and you're startled by the gesture. you take your seat and he takes his. "you're more gentlemanly then i expected you to be satoru, pulling out my chair for me," you pause for a second mulling your thoughts over before adding, "or is that normal etiquette?"
"i'm very chivalrous, i'll have you know," he replies pouting and you raise an eyebrow at how fake his answer sounded. he throws his hands up with a smirk, "well, i'm not always chivalrous but if a pretty lady is in front of me than i can become very courteous." you chuckle, trying not to hone in the pretty part for your own sanity.
you glance at the table and worry because satoru might know proper etiquette but you don't. you know the general rules and ideas but why are there two knives and forks next to your plate and a spoon as well? why are there two glasses, a wine one and a normal one? why does the napkin look fancy? does that mean it's just for decoration, what if you need it? you're worried that you'll leave smudges in places where there shouldn't be and what if the table cloth rips? maybe this was a mistake...
"hey," satoru says softly catching your attention, when you look back up at him you see his smirk has turned into a frown and you don't think you've seen that expression on his face before, it doesn't fit right. he's taken off his sunglasses and placed them down, hanging them out of his suit pocket. his striking baby blue eyes glinting when the chandelier droplets move in the light. his snowy white hair looking soft and subdued under the glow of the light and the wavering flame of the candle. "sweetheart, whatever you're thinking right now isn't true."
"how did y-"
he cuts you off before you can finish asking. "because i know you and i know that look on your face, that overthinking look, i can see all those unnecessary cogs turning in your brain."
"i just..." you look away from him, not wanting to look into his eyes any longer knowing you'll crumble but gojo's not allowing that. with how long his arms are it's not difficult reaching over the table to you, placing his fingers below your chin and tilting your head around to look at him.
"just what? sweetheart." satoru presses you.
bunching up your skirt into tight fists you take a shaky breath and try again, "i'm worried i don't belong here. this is a really lovely place satoru and i just... what if i embarrass you? i'm not like you, i don't know when to do certain things or say specific things, i don't know why the table is placed like it is or any of it," after the words stop spewing out your mouth you take another breath, this time not shaky and deep. you look relieved to get it out.
'silly girl.' "do you really think i'd get embarrassed because of you sweetheart? nothing you could do would make me embarrassed. i'm lucky that you're with me right now. i don't care if you don't know all the rules and you shouldn't either, all that matters is that we're here together and we get to finally see each other after some hectic few days," gojo tells you earnestly, his body close to the edge of the table, leaning forward further near you, his voice low and intimate, like what he's saying is a complete secret for your ears only. the days were hectic and finally you're getting to see each other. those tedious meetings with his family and hours of basketball that seemed to stretch on and on but finally- you're together again.
your shoulders sag, you weren't even aware that your plush figure had tensed up in the first place. when satoru saw how you relaxed your posture he picks up one of the menus, "everything okay now?" he asks you, his eyes soft as they gaze at you.
"yeah, i think so." you lick your lips, wetting them after getting dry, the intense spike of emotions throwing your body threw a little bit of a loop, dry lips, moist eyes, with shaky fingers.
gojo grins and leans back on his chair, seeming more casual than a minute ago and hands you a menu. "what are you thinking about getting? i might go for the lobster."
you're browsing the menu but when you hear him you put it down momentarily to reply, "oh please, like you care about the lobster, you just want dessert," you say grinning wide.
gojo gasps and places his hands on his chest in mock offence. "dessert? i think you mean desserts." you laugh, eyes crinkling in amusement. "i want you to enjoy this meal just as much as i'm planning to, that's why i intend to get the lobster, i don't want you to feel like you have to rush while eating just because i want dessert and i don't want you to even think about a silly thing like money." 'so he's ordering one of the biggest and expensive dishes? ...that does sound like satoru actually.' although you would be none the wiser about the prices of these meals, it's one of those high-end restaurants that doesn't have the prices on the menu, satoru must have been here often enough to know how much the lobster costs compared to other dishes.
"i don't know what to do about drinks, i hear they've got a fine collection of wines, maybe we should order a couple bottles? do you like wine?" he already knows the answer to that but you don't know that. "they've also got a wide selection of spirits and non-alcoholic drinks too, i believe."
you both order what you want, making idle conversation while waiting.
by the time your food arrives satoru has tried to convince you that you should've ordered a bigger meal, you're content with your choice in the end though and it's not the most surprising that when your food does arrive there's also a side dish for you to which you didn't order.
"i didn't order this satoru," you raise an eyebrow.
gojo smirks, "i know you didn't, but i did. i didn't want you to be hungry and we haven't had lunch together in days have you been eating properly?"
"are you suggesting that because i'm eating food in my price bracket instead of yours that it's not good enough? the food you pay for is definitely better but poor people food taste good too."
he chuckles and smiles at you fondly before replying, "that's not what i'm saying and you know i'm not. I am however asking have you been eating three meals a day?" you wince. "i thought not."
"i've been busy with studies, i didn't have time to eat three meals a day every single day," you try to justify.
"that's exactly what i mean. i won't take any excuses though, you shouldn't have skipped any meals." satoru lightly scowls you but don't take it too seriously, you should have though. 'silly girl, she really can't look after herself properly. it's a good thing i'm here to keep an eye on her. she just can't be trusted on her own.'
you pout at his reasoning, it's not often that gojo reprimands you or anyone you've seen for that matter. knowing that you don't have a leg to stand on you keep quiet.
when you eat the first bite of your food you hum blissfully, so close to being a moan and it's music to satoru's ears, 'god she's adorable.' he doesn't even realise that he isn't eating until you noticed that he's unmoving. "satoru are you okay? you're not eating."
"i'm fine sweetheart just thinking about something," he responds with a smile.
"okay- if you're sure but make sure you eat soon or it'll get cold."
"yes ma'am," satoru gives you a cheeky smile and picks up his fork.
your face heats up in embarrassment and you lose any composure that you previously had. you avert you eyes and focus on the tablecloth, suddenly finding it very interesting, focusing on the material. you never knew being called something would make you feel so strange, it was the complete opposite to gojo calling you princess or sweetheart.
even though satoru picked up his fork and began eating he didn't take his eyes off you at the corner of his eye, he wanted to see your reaction to that name. he wanted to test how docile you are, his theory that you are submissive and it seems he was right, although even if he wasn't and his theory was proven wrong he'd just mold you into what he wants. 'of course she's so perfect that i don't need to change her, she's such a good girl.'
quickly ma'am leaves your head with the more delicious food you have but you can't help some negative thoughts enter your mind. everything starts to feel too good to be true, the twinkling lights and the flickering of the candle on the table, the scenery and the ambience, the delectable food and the amazing beverages, the dream company with someone who you care so very much about, you wouldn't want to be anywhere else and... it just all feels too good to be true.
'how many girls does gojo come here with? they knew who he was without giving his name. i know i'm not his girlfriend. it's not like i'm jealous it's just- i want this so bad to be special. am i one in a long line?' you have to ask, you have to know. if you're not special you need to know.
"satoru-" you start by getting his attention.
he looks up at you and sees the pensive look on your face, he puts his cutlery down and ceases eating, directing all his attention to you, "yes princess?"
"can i ask you something?" you ask, hesitant and more meekly now you have his attention.
"of course you can princess," he smiles and waits for you to ask whatever it is. he truly doesn't know what it could be right now.
"am i special? i mean- wait- not special. i mean do you take lots of girls here? they seemed to know your name already so do you? i know we're friends so it wouldn't be the same as you taking other girls here but do you take lots of girls here?"
he doesn't even try to stop the smirk that creeps onto his face, you're jealous and what's even better do you even know that you're jealous. satoru can barely contain his excitement.
not once have you brought up other girls, not once. you've never asked if it's true that he doesn't date anyone for longer than a month or that he's gone through half the school. you've never asked about the crude gossip about how big his dick is and how he's the best anyone has ever had even though he knows you've definitely heard those rumours. but right now? right now your words hint of jealously and insecurity.
satoru tells the truth as he replies simply "i haven't brought any girls here." gojo dangles the small piece of information in front of you, it isn't a question of if you'll take it and ask further questions he knows you will but he wants to hear you ask for more, it thrills him.
"you-you dont?" you ask for more explanation.
he grins, "nope," he pops the 'p'. "i go here with my family and on occasion suguru but only sometimes with suguru because it can be kind of intimate with two people," he explains and you giggle at the thought of the two of them sitting across from each other here. he carries on his explanation, "i would never go here with other girls, of course you're special," he tells you honestly and your lips part, hanging onto every word spoken.
'i'm special.' you press your lips together but the corners of your mouth still manage to lift up into a small smile. your brain then fully catches up with everything he said and your heart beats erratically, just now satoru said a dinner here between two people is intimate, he didn't word it in that exact way but if a dinner for two with suguru is intimate, a dinner for two with you might be considered intimate too. overall you're pleased with the answer you were given, gojo thinks your special and he doesn't take other girls here.
you eat the rest of your dinner without incident, enjoying every single mouthful and letting gojo know that it's tasty, thanking him. when you order dessert it's no surprise that satoru goes a bit overboard nearly buying the whole dessert menu, not that you would ever complain about a thing like that, the more time you've spent with gojo the more of a sweet tooth you've become yourself.
satoru doesn't attempt to hide the bill, he enjoys the look on your face when you see the amount in the corner of your eye. for him the money is trivial sum but to you it's shockingly high. he gets a power trip when he sees your eyes widen at the money.
"do you want to come back to mine?" satoru asks you while you leave the restaurant and you agree not thinking anything of it. he's been to yours before but you've never been to his. you don't think there's anything behind his question, you don't even consider he's suggesting something and gojo's well aware that you don't realise.
you don't speak much on your way back, you're leaning against the window and watching the city lights, it's starting to drizzle and you feel at ease in your current company, your eyes fluttering, slightly drowsily, as you hear the rain. gojo taps his fingers on the steering wheel and smiles thinking about how adorable you look right now.
the journey back to satoru's could've taken ten minutes to an hour for all you know as your mind wanders and your eyelids get heavy. when you arrive and he parks up and you get out of the car, you shiver a bit as the cold air hits you, giving you a shock and getting rid of any lingering tiredness and satoru walks around the car to be next to you. he pouts as he bends down to look at you, his sunglasses still in his jacket pocket, "pretty ladies aren't just supposed to have their chair pulled out for them, they're meant to have doors open for them too."
you giggle and bump against him, "flattery will get you nowhere mister." it does. luckily you'll be able to blame your flushed face due to the bitterly cold if gojo questions you on it.
"let's get inside sweetheart, it's cold." 'sweetheart' something else you can luckily blame on the weather. you're not expecting satoru to randomly touch your face though so you think you're going to be okay.
you follow him inside and the size of his place is a large as you thought it would be, you're learning to expect everything he owns is extravagant. the interior however is something you take note of, you've only entered one room but it seems barren. the walls are drab, painted slate grey and off white with only the bare necessaries of furniture and nothing more. devoid of any human presence. you're not even sure if he's lived here long and when he looks at you he can see those unnecessary cogs turning in your head again. "is something on your mind princess?"
"um-" you don't really know if you should bring it up but your curiosity gets the better of you. "have you lived here long?"
"a couple of years," satoru leans against the wall and smirks.
"i just- there's not a lot of stuff in here, it looks like you still have unpacking to do."
he pushes himself off the wall and goes over to you, "do you think i should get more stuff? like cushions for the the sofa and posters on the wall?" you feel gojo's breath against your skin as he leans down to talk in your ear quietly, it's so intimate, your mind draws a blank finding it hard to think with him so close to you. satoru is playful and he's teasing and you've heard rumours that he's a flirt but he's never been this close to you before, you've never been able to smell his cologne and been this close to feel his warm breath against your neck. "maybe we should go shopping together and you could help me pick out some stuff?" you're holding your breath, not being able to breathe anymore. "or maybe it would be better if you just stayed here and brought your stuff along? you do always complain about your rent being high."
you take a sharp intake of air and move a step away from him so you can look back at him in the eye. mentally shaking your head to forgot about his remark. 'did gojo just say about me being his roommate? i'd get to see him everyday... wait... i'd have to hear him all the time when he brings home girls and does he even clean after himself properly?'
"did you have too much to drink tonight satoru? you know you shouldn't drink and drive," you reply with light tone, reminding yourself not to think too hard about the situation, almost being successful in your mission.
satoru just watches you and smirks as he sees you try to ignore his comment. "anyway i don't think you need a roommate." 'roommate? yeah i don't need one of those...'
"and for all i know you might steal my food from the fridge and not wash up the dishes. plus i always forget my towel when i shower." you say the last sentence flippantly, but satoru's mind fills with thoughts of you... 'walking out of the shower into the living room with a small towel on, barely covering your body, body damp with water dripping down your neck, onto your shoulders down to the valley of your breasts...' he's getting hard just imagining it.
"are you okay satoru? you're a bit red." you question and the topic of conversation changes.
satoru moves back away from you, "i'm okay princess, probably thirsty. do you want a drink?" he's glad of this change, he'd like to tease you more but there'd be a real chance you'd see his erection, he could probably tease you about it if you'd notice it but he doesn't think you're ready yet. he wants to make sure you're relaxed and comfortable. you've got a long night ahead of you.
"sure."
following him into the kitchen you take a seat on one of the kitchen counter stools. "what would you like to drink?"
not wanting to ask for something he might not have or cause a fuss you respond with, "whatever you're having is good with me."
'she's so predictable.' he pours both of you your favourite drink, he knows all your preferences, of course he's stocked up on everything you like. he hands it to you and you smile wide, "this is like my all time favourite drink, i didn't know you liked it too."
in situations like this he switches his answers up from time to time not wanting you to get suspicious. "do you like these too? the amount i get through weekly is crazy." he makes sure to separate things into two categories, things you've told him and things you haven't but he knows anyway. he wouldn't want to mention in conversation about how he remembers that you like these drinks when you've never told so.
satoru likes when he tells you things that subtly suggest, 'look how much we have in common. we like all the same music and drinks!'
he prefers when he tells you he remembers something you told him, you quietly replying to him once about how much it means to you because "no one has ever cared about me to remember something so mundane about me." he swears that he'll remember everything about you, he swore he'd never forget a single thing.
gojo takes his place next to you, sitting on the stool and purposely brushing his hand against your rib, under your breast, and he gets pleasure from seeing you straighten up your back.
you both enjoy your drinks and kick your legs in the air. "i feel bad because you've been driving me around all night. when i go i'll get an uber or cab or something."
gojo frowns, "are you going now?"
"n-no! unless you want me to?" you don't want to overstay your welcome and you have a feeling that if gojo wanted you to go he'd let you know and you want to look around the other rooms if you have a chance, perhaps not his bedroom for privacy reasons but you want to see if his other rooms have plain decoration and if the bathroom has any noteworthy products in, you have always wanted to know how his skin looks so good all the time.
"i'm definitely not telling you to leave princess... in fact why don't you stay the night? you can stay in the spare room. no pressure though. you don't have to but there might not be anywhere you can get a lift because of how late it is and how it's the other side of town adding that all onto it's now pouring down. i'd offer to take you back myself but i'm not a huge fan of driving in the dark, especially if the roads are slippy 'cause to the rain. it's your choice. i'm sure you'll get someone to take you eventually but it might be less effort to stay here and leave tomorrow?"
he knows you don't want to wait forever getting home, he knows you want to take him up on his offer but something is stopping you, he doesn't know what is it for a moment until he figures it. "it's absolutely no bother, i don't mind and i've got clothes that you can wear, i think i wore them to lounge about in on tuesday so i haven't had time to wash them yet but i don't think that's a huge problem. i wear them a lot but they're too big on me, you should fit in them."
that small comment might have upset you more if it came from someone else but you don't think gojo meant it maliciously, you think it came from a good place, however you couldn't help thinking about it, the words 'they're too big on me, you should fit in them' ring around your head, about how you should fit in them. you know that satoru didn't mean anything by that but you've never worn someone else's clothes before so it gives you a bit of anxiety and satoru can see that.
gojo speaks again in an attempt to stop you from other thinking. "if you did want to go i'll give you the money to get a cab but if not you can stay, it's no problem, in fact i would enjoy it." your eyes snap up to look at him and you see a soft smile adorning his face. "we could watch that new film you were telling me about and i don't mean to brag but my shower is amazing, nothing compares, even five star hotels." you crack a smile but your mind still lingers on the clothes. satru can see that still not fully convinced and there's something stopping you, "is this about the clothes?" you shift your eyes away nervously not wanting to admit how you clung to a few words. gojo stops himself from sighing in exasperation. "if you'd feel more comfortable keeping the blouse and skirt on you can, you do look good in them but you shouldn't overthink about wearing my clothes. i know i said they're not clean but i've only worn them once since they've been washed it's not like they're diseased." you giggle and satoru gets less exasperated after hearing you laugh.
"they'll fit you if that's what you're worried about and honestly even if they are a little tight you'd still look good in my shirt, it would just hang onto your hips a bit." your mouth parts, the previous throwaway remark being swiped away like smoke by his hand, instead being replaced by insurance that it will fit and if by the off chance it doesn't then it's not the end of the world. he hopes it doesn't fit.
it quells your mind and you agree to stay. "thank you satoru, i'd appreciate staying, over the hassle of getting home."
he grins at your answer, hands itching to take off your blouse. "do you want a shower now so we can watch that film?"
"sounds good." you follow him into the bathroom and it looks like the living room, crystal clean, newly moved into, the only difference is his electric toothbrush on the side and moisturiser. gojo doesn't leave when he shows you into the room, he doesn't leave when he makes a quick explanation about how the shower works, in fact he didn't tell you at all. instead of telling you he turns the shower on, adjusting the handle to change the temperature to the one you prefer and pressing a button next to the handle, keeping his finger on it for a few seconds before removing it, changing the water pressure. "here you go princess," he grins and turns back to you. you think to yourself about how you could of figured out how to work the shower but you don't vocalise it, you've been in enough showers to know how they work but satoru's one is probably different if he did it himself.
"oh, the shower wash and shampoo is there, i don't know if you want to wash your hair but it's there if you need it. you'll have to use my one." he then leaves, before placing a towel on the sink for you to grab when you get out. he owns all the soaps and scents you use but you can't use them, he doesn't want to share. if he gave you them you'd be suspicious and there would be less for him to use when he misses your smell, groaning in the shower after he gets home from basketball his hands massaging your shampoo into his scalp, one hand in his hair the other fisting his cock. he'll buy you new perfumes and soaps for the holidays, he would never change any of your signature scents but you deserve more expensive products in his eyes.
a part of you still can't help but think about the clothes but when you step into the shower your eyes close and body relaxes, somehow it's the perfect way you like your showers. all of it melts away and as you pick up gojo's shower wash your body heats up inside. you're going to use the same soap as gojo uses and once you recognise how you reacted you shake your head to get away from all those thoughts. everybody at your university would likely have the same reaction as you but you're not just anyone, satoru is your dear friend and he deserves more respect than you just gave him. you don't spend long showering, wanting to not use his soap for a long period and you end up not washing your hair.
you dry yourself but panic as you can't find clothes anywhere, did satoru forget? maybe the plan was for you to put your clothes back on until he's gave you them. opening the door ajar you peek outside, you're planning on seeing if you can hear satoru, asking him about the clothes but before you can you see a shirt on the floor next to the door. picking it up, you close the door quickly and breathe deeply, glad that you noticed the shirt before calling out to gojo.
when you start to slip into the shirt you feel a repeat of the shower, it smells so much like him. you didn't realise when you agreed to this you'd have to be concerned about this but you are and it's making you feel guilty. like you're no better than those girls who throw themselves at him, only based on appearances alone. you put it on as quickly as you can and try to ignore the smell but the entire room is filled with it. it smells different to the soap, it smells more like him, 'his natural scent?' you ponder. it effects you differently than it would his fans though, they'd be filled with thoughts that are less than appropriate, like being pushed into his pillow while he's taking them from behind or not wasting time with getting completely nude but to you they're innocent, the smell is comforting like when he surprises you by suddenly grabbing you from behind or crowding your space as you worked on projects together. it's not the smell of satoru gojo, famous 'womaniser', 'manwhore', 'heartbreaker', with a reputation that would make a nymphomaniac blush, it's the smell of satoru gojo- your gojo. and annoyingly your gojo, your friend, smells really good.
satoru was right about the shirt. because of how tall he is it reached down to your thigh, you were slightly worried about accidentally flashing him but it was long enough not to worry too much about it. he was also right about how it clung to you. even though it clung to you it didn't make you feel uncomfortable, the fabric stretched a tad around your hips and chest but it didn't make you feel uneasy, you doubt satoru would even notice. he, of course, does. and takes great pleasure in it.
you fold up the towel and leave it in the laundry basket. exiting the room you hear satoru and go to him. he hears you near him entering the room and looks up from the sofa, "you okay?"
you smile sweetly and nod your head, "i'm okay, it was a good shower."
he returns your smile, "i'm glad."
satoru doesn't hide his staring as you move to the sofa to sit down next to him. you're so cute and you're so hot all he can do is stare and he's so thankful that you agreed to come to his and stay. he's never let anyone wear his clothes before, it's a boundary that he doesn't cross. his previous relationships weren't allowed to wear his clothes, if it was cold outside and someone didn't bring a coat he wouldn't give them his, he never cared about them that much to do things like that but when you walk in wearing his clothes his heart jumps with joy. he never thought about how much he'd love seeing you wear his shirt, it's not just a shirt it's a statement, you're his, he owns you. it barely covers your thighs and he knows if he gets you to move and bend down, even if only slightly, everything will be on display. his shirt is clinging to your curves and he's practically salivating as your hips look so grabbable.
you're none the wiser of this and when he turns on the film you previously spoken about he was paying more attention to you than the television, every so often shuffling a little bit closer to you. he doesn't wait long, it's been about twenty minutes through the film before he puts his arm around you, he slings his arm around your shoulder when you walk together sometimes so it's not the first time this has happened. this is regular behaviour in your eyes.
forgetting his arm is even around you you become invested in what you're watching, you were right to mention it to gojo, it's exceeded your expectations. you have no reaction to satoru taking his arm off your shoulder and instead placing it on your plush thigh. he has more of a reaction that you do, biting his lip to stop any noises that could come out because you would likely notice if he groaned. after a couple of minutes of his hands being still he starts moving, making small patterns on your skin and stroking you. his hand gets higher, reaching the hem of his shirt before stopping and leaving his hand there.
as the film ends you become more aware of where gojo's hand is resting but you choose not to say anything. you're flustered but you think he's put his hand there absentmindedly while watching the film so you keep quiet.
"did you enjoy the film princess?"
you smile brightly at him and respond, "i did! did you?"
satoru starts making patterns on your skin lightly again. tapping his finger on his chin with his other hand like he's thinking and making a noise, "hmmm i did enjoy it although i was distracted through most of it."
that catches your attention wondering what it was that he was focused on instead. "oh, what was it?"
he smirks, "it's hard to pay attention to anything other than how pretty you look right now."
satoru had called you a pretty lady earlier tonight but this feels more personal, your brain refusing to work and it's exhilarating for him to see it happen.
he cups your cheek in his hand so you're making direct eye contact with each other, he doesn't want to look away from him. "do you want this sweetheart?"
your heart is pounding in your chest like a hummingbirds wings and you worry that satoru can hear it, swallowing before replying, "w-what do you mean?"
he leans closer to you and feel like your body is buzzing, tiny zaps of electricity shooting through your veins at his proximity to you, "do you want me?"
"i-i," you're stuttering over your words and nothing makes sense. do you want him? want him to do what?
"sweetheart do you want me?" he reiterates putting more emphasis on the 'want' and slivering his hand up further along your thigh, inching under your, his, shirt. you wait with bated breath, wondering if he'll go further, wondering if he'll say more.
"satoru are you... are you coming onto me?" you're quiet when you ask, you're unsure, you worry that you're wrong and gojo can't help but laugh.
"obviously i'm coming onto you. i thought that was pretty clear."
"you are?" you're still quiet.
"yeah," he smirks at you however your eyes drift away from him feeling shy but gojo's not having that, he pats your cheek before saying, "look at me princess." you do what he says and make eye contact with him again, "there she is, "he smiles at you and kisses your nose making your whole body heat up, your lips part open in shock and he smirks.
"i'm going to ask again, do you want this?" lowering his voice he continues speaking, "because i want this."
'he wants this. he wants me... but do i want him? everyone wants him. do i want him? if we do this it might never be the same again, we might stop being friends... satoru is really attractive, he's hot, he can get anyone he wants but will this mess everything up... i don't know.'
he can see those unnecessary cogs again, how silly, how useless.
he doesn't wait for you to answer, he's given you time and instead of answering you're thinking, overthinking, not being a good girl at all. instead of waiting any longer he closes the space between you two and slots his mouth against yours, licking your lips in a silent request to open your mouth, you oblige his request without any more thought and just simply do what feels right, do what feels good, and kissing satoru feelings good.
his lips are soft, probably softer than yours but you can't tell with them against each other. imaging the kiss you'd think gojo would kiss someone slowly, languidly. you imagine he wouldn't put a lot of effort or passion in the kiss but it would still be the best kiss anyone has ever had. you never thought he'd be a passionate kisser. you know from rumours that his relationships don't last long, it seems to you that he's never been invested in any of them so what's the point in kissing someone like you can't get enough of them when he's going to move on to the next person in a week, so what's the point of kissing passionately but right now that theory is blown out the window. his movement is rushed, it's hungry, it's unexpected. you didn't think he'd be so greedy. his skilled tongue is against yours and he's completely dominating the kiss. satoru's not even stopping for air and he's not letting you either, he's been waiting for this for so long now and a stupid reason like needing to breathe isn't going to stop him.
satoru's leaving wet kisses down your jaw and pulse point anywhere that's visible he's kissing. leaving little nips in his wake and trying to find a good space for him to start leaving marks and hickeys so everyone will know you're his.
the hand that was holding onto your thigh squeezes gently and a shiver runs down his spine because you feel so soft. he pushes you down on the sofa and he's above you looking down, knocking your thighs open and kneeling between them. he's swears he's never seen a more beautiful sight. you get nervous when you look at him, the way he looks at you tenderly with those vibrant blue eyes, that unbeknownst to you hold so much love for you.
you're gasping at every new sensation gojo's giving you, never having felt like this before as his continues his path up your thigh moving the shirt up along with it and now he's finally touching your plush body he thinks he may be in heaven with a gorgeous goddess with him and the more he moves the shirt up the more he thinks so. both of his hands moving to your hips and pressing his fingers into your skin watching them spill over and it's making him dizzy. never has he felt anyone with your body before and it's driving him crazy. he wants more, he needs more.
satoru brushes his knuckles over your underwear making you whine and he smirks, "feel good princess?"
"uh huh," you reply nodding your head up and down rapidly, head fuzzy and wanting more, wanting him.
"yeah?" he asks smugly. " ' course you do." he taps your hips just above the line of your underwear, "lift up for me sweetheart." you move up so he can pull down your underwear and he pockets them in his jeans saving them for later. he doesn't waste anytime as he unzips his jeans and takes them off, pulling his shirt off after, the only reason of the shirt being off is that he wants you to see how hot he looks and to check him out, he knows he looks good and he wants you to know it too.
he presses two fingers into you and you moan. "i'm going to prepare you sweetheart." it wasn't a question but you nod your head anyway. his slender fingers are longer than yours, reaching placing you can't, he's leisurely taking his time, watching as you squirm, eyes starting to glaze over.
only after four minutes and he's had enough of this leisurely pace fingering though, he just has to have his dick inside you now. he would promise to go slow but he knows he can't promise that. you don't see his dick before he goes into you, if you did you'd say something but instead you feel it. more girth than most and nine inches long thus as he starts to thrust into you you let out a moan that soon fades into a silent scream.
with each inch you feel that it must be it but then there's more, he knows he should've spent more time getting you ready for him but the idea of waiting even a minute longer was torture.
at the same time of being fully inside you, you wince, and satoru places a chaste kiss on your lips. there's a fleeting thought as you wince about how you think his cock has broken you, so far he's in your guts. he keeps his hold on you as he thrusts shallowly a few times testing the waters and playfully pinching your nipple to see your reaction.
you try to speak but the words get caught in your throat and it doesn't take long for gojo to speed up, not even a minute and he's already thrusting hard and fast into you, a creamy white ring already forming at the base of his cock. his pace doesn't falter, in fact it gets more rough as satoru sees your face. it's hard for you to even think, you've never been this full before, you're eyes are glazed over and you've got your mouth open drooling a bit, he thinks you look so adorably dumb. "look at you princess you look so dumb right now, so stupid. you don't even have one thought in your head do you? it's so fucking hot. not thinking or worrying, all that matters is this, you don't need to think i'll do it for you."
satoru lifts up one of your thighs and puts it on his shoulder, at the new position it feels like he's reaching even deeper. you whine so loud that people walking outside would hear. "my cock's making you lose braincells huh?" he grins, tapping your cheek gently to get your attention. you look up at him in a daze and he sniggers. "not a thought behind those eyes."
at the new angle you try to grab hold of his arm but struggle to focus losing grip straight away, squealing, "ah it feels s' good 'toru!"
satoru is pleased that you've spoken something, that you've been able to form an legible sentence, he's even more pleased at how good you sound squealing, knowing that he's the one who's made you sound like that. however more than all of that he's overjoyed that you called him 'toru' it sounds so perfect from your mouth.
"i know, i know, you're so good for me princess, such a good girl." he keeps slamming into you at a brutal pace and he wants you to come undone around him soon before he cums. "hear that princess, your pussy is so wet and sticky for me. she knows what she wants huh," he grins and starts pinching your nipples, watching as your eyes roll back.
he's fucking you so rough that your body is moving up and down on the sofa, jiggling with each thrusts, and as he watches your body bounce he gets closer and closer. he normally lasts so much longer but he can't help it with you, it's impossible for him to keep his regular time when your warm wet walls are wrapping around his cock, when he's inside you.
satoru can't wait any longer removing his hand from your nipple and bringing it to your clit, rubbing harshly as you shriek from the sudden extra stimulation, as you get tighter around him he sucks his teeth so close to cumming, "are you going to cum for me sweetheart?"
you don't say anything, you don't have time to answer him because instead the coil in the stomach that has been winding up for the last half an hour snaps, with the added help of gojo touching your clit, you arch your back, and your eyesight goes fuzzy seeing white dots. you've never had such an intense orgasm before, it drowned out noise and made everything hard to hear, you didn't even know cumming could do that. everyone was right about sex with satoru.
feeling you spasm around him was even for him to finish as well, a few more thrusts into you and he lost it cumming too. if he was a better man he would've pulled out but satoru knew that he would never pull out when it comes to you. he's seen birth control in your bathroom before and when he saw it he frowned, he hopes that you missed it today. either way he's making sure to bury himself in you as deep as he can get hoping that even if you did take birth control today it won't be good enough to stop his intention- his deep desire to breed you. thoughts racing through his head, 'silly girls don't need to go to university they should just stay at home. i've got more than enough money to look after her. she'd look so good, her body even softer than it already is. she'd make such a good mama.' as he comes his body goes taut and he groans loudly saying your name and stilling.
you're both catching your breathe, not speaking for a minute, recovering for the most mindblowing sex both of you have ever had.
he wants to stay where he is but he knows he can't. when he moves you whimper, feeling empty all of a sudden, and it makes his ego rise, "sorry princess, i'm going to get you a towel okay." satoru kisses your forehead before rising and getting a towel from the bathroom, coming back and kneeling, swiping the towel gently over your inner thighs and pussy. kissing your hip and looking back at you, "are you okay?"
you're breathless as you reply, "yeah."
satoru smirks, "that's good."
you cover your face with your hands, timid with the way gojo's focused on you. putting the towel down he holds onto your hands and removes them from your face so he can see you again, smiling at you sweetly and kissing your forehead again.
"satoru what's going to happen now?" you're almost silent, if he wasn't so laser focused on every movement and thing you do he might not have heard.
"we could watch another film but it's getting late."
"no... i mean with us..."
satoru furrows his eyebrows, not understanding the question. "us?"
"yeah i-i mean are we s-still friends?"
"friends?" he looks at you like you've grown an extra head and your stomach sinks, if you knew this would've been the outcome you would've done something differently.
you don't want to lose gojo, you really don't want to lose gojo. you don't want to cry in front of him, you don't want it to get misconstrued and him to think that you're trying to manipulate him or change his mind but the idea of not having satoru in your life is heartbreaking. wait... heartbreaking? however the tears still come and the words get lodged in your throat. you manage to get some words out but it's barely audible with how erratic your breathing is becoming and how you keep swallowing every five seconds. "can i do anything to make us be friends again? i don't want to lose you." you're sniffling and you know you sound needy and probably desperate too but that's not your main focus right now.
"lose me?" he squints and gently wipes the tears from your face. "why would you lose me?" he cups you cheek, "princess how do you feel about me?"
your mouth parts open, you're glad that he's suggesting that you're not going to lose him but that's completely overshadowed with the question he's asked. you stay silent, not moving a muscle, how do you feel about him?
'satoru's my friend, my best friend! so... i feel that he's my friend? did i feel this way about my other friends? i lost my other friends and it was awful, i hated it but if i lost satoru... i think it would be worse than awful. maybe soul crushing is accurate... heartbreaking sounds more accurate. can someone be heartbroken about a friend? can i?'
you can't say anything, you don't know what to say, all your thoughts are muddled and you feel lost. gojo's still cupping your cheek, now stroking it with his thumb. "alright then princess, let me tell you." you don't know how he's going to tell you, you don't even understand yourself. "you don't see me as a friend anymore." he says simply and your eyes widen, and he holds onto your elbow with no force with his other hand to stop you if you try to draw away.
"do you know why i know that princess?" satoru asks you, his voice tethered, borderlining on husky. unsure you shake your head. "because friends don't act like you do. they don't get jealous about the thought of me taking girls out to restaurants, they don't check me out when they think i'm not looking. friends don't make a photo of us together as their lockscreen and wallpaper-"
at that you interrupt him, "you have me on your lockscreen too!" but he puts his fingers to your lips to gesture for you to keep quiet.
"not finished yet sweetheart. friends don't send each other good morning texts as soon as they wake up and they don't memorise my order at cafés we go to. friends don't stare at my lips and compliment my eyes all the time. friends don't look at me longingly. friends don't go to romantic restaurants alone together."
he pauses watching with rapt attention as you look down at your lap, he doesn't make you look up at him this time and waits for your response. when you decide to look back at him you calm your breathing as much as you can, "b-but you do those things too satoru..."
satoru grins brightly, "yeah i do, sooo... that would mean what?" he presses you to answer him.
"do you- do you- am i more than a friend to you satoru?"
"bingo!"
you feel like you're dreaming, nothing feels real. you could never of guessed that gojo feels that way or that you're his type. "is that why we had sex?"
satoru chuckles, not answering but instead replying, "you're so cute!" it makes your face heat up. "do you want me to tell you a secret?" you're nervous and dubious but you nod your head softly. gojo moves even closer than you, "you're more than just my friend princess," he leans closer to your ear and whispers "i love you."
you blink at him- once, twice, three times. you understand now that gojo is more than a friend to you and you recognise it's been this way for a very long time but through all his speech you didn't consider he felt the same. maybe that's why you didn't understand your own feelings, because if gojo acts the same as you do and calls you his friend you never questioned about if you really felt friendship towards him.
how long as satoru known all this and has kept you in the dark? what if he choose not to ever tell you? would you end up in a relationship with someone else only to break their heart when you finally realise that you're in love with satoru. your mouth is dry and you lick your lips swallowing to wet them, your voice still sounds a little hoarse though as you say, "why didn't you tell me?"
"because you'll understand and accept your own feelings and mine. i wanted to tell you but i know you, i knew that you would just deny it and ignore your feelings and it could result in something changing with us and that was the last thing i wanted sweetheart, it would kill me but i knew that it was time. i knew that you'd accept both of our feelings," he asserts and he's so close to you that you can feel his body heat.
you know what he's saying is true but you can't help but pout. "how do you know me better than myself satoru?"
satoru chuckles. well he does spend a great deal of his time loving everything you do...
"plus i couldn't keep it in any longer princess, i swear i was going mad. i would probably have folded soon and tell you," he whines and you giggle.
you take a deep breath and look at him straight in the eye, your whole body feeling fuzzy, "satoru i love you."
'yeah i know.'
gojo grins and wipes his forehead dramatically, "thank god." he holds onto the nape of your neck and pulls you to his lips so he can kiss you hungrily, as he pulls away he asks "do you still want to sleep in the spare room tonight? my room is more comfortable... and there may be some boxes on the bed that i haven't moved."
your eyes widen, "say you're joking 'toru!"
he throws his hands up and grins "well..."
you don't stay mad at him long, you've both confessed your love to each other it's not like you can be annoyed at him, you grin back, "i can't believe you."
"i swear it wasn't planned just a happy coincidence... that i chose not to tell you about... but it's okay because we can just use that room for any of your extra stuff when you move in."
you open your mouth wide in disbelief, "i cannot believe you satoru!"
"aw come on you know you love me!" he chuckles and you glare at him before be pokes your cheek and you start laughing too.
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P*rn ☆ Chapter 8, A moment of bliss
Masterlist Word count: 3.5 k Sylus x Fem!Reader
Summary: You have been following a spicy content creator by the name of Red Crow for some time now. Nothing could’ve prepared you for what would happen when he moves into the apartment next door.
Author's note: Hi everyone. Enjoy Sylus being a switch/bottom for this one. He won't be for every chapter, but he's desperate and you've been waiting for this sooooo... I do want to remind everyone that this is my first time writing a smutty story. I hope it makes sense. <3
Warning! This story is meant for mature audiences. It contains sex, swear words, porn, smoking, intimate piercings, mentions of drugs, alcohol, mentions of domestic abuse, and other mature themes. Do not engage if you are under 18.
Mature content under the cut.
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'And then he slept over,' you tell Zayne over the phone and quickly add, 'we just cuddled. It was nice.' He doesn't need to say anything for you to know he disapproves. Just wait, he'll tell you that you shouldn't invite men you don't know over to your apartment. Especially not types like Sylus.
'That's nice. He deserves something good in his life.' "What?!" 'Are you still there?' You probably stayed silent with your jaw on the floor a little too long. Maybe you shouldn't be too surprised. When you showed Zayne a picture of Sylus he looked physically pained, but not in a fearful way. It was empathetic.
'Yes, yes, I'm still here, sorry. I expected you to lecture me on inviting strange men into my apartment,' you admit.
'I would, but I know this man. I think he's a good one,' Zayne admits, 'I'm glad you ran into him. Seems the type for you.' Fair enough. Zayne has listened to you whine about men often enough to be glad you're finally actually like one. There's a knock at your door and a rush of nerves goes through your system.
'Oh, that must be him,' you tell Zayne, 'I'll call you later, okay? We still need to set a date for our annual trip.'
'Sure. I'll talk to you later.' His voice sounds amused, almost like he's smiling through the phone. You feel a little flustered. He probably picked up on your tone change when you heard the knocks on the door.
'Bye.' You put your phone in your pocket and walk towards the door, stopping in front of the hallway mirror to check yourself one last time. Outfit, comfy but cute. Hair, eh, good enough. Makeup, minimal but nice. You pull the door open to reveal Sylus in a barely buttoned black blouse and slacks. Now you feel awfully underdressed in your jeans. Are you sure you agreed on dinner and a movie at his place? This looks like he's taking you to a 3-star dining and rented the whole cinema.
But, you should have known he was going to be dressed like that. After all, it was the same outfit he wore in his newest video. The one he posted today, earlier than he usually does. In a way, you feel like he did it to tease you. Especially since it wasn't all that erotic. It was just him sitting back against the headboard of his bed with a book in his hand, reading the most utterly horny smutty chapter you've ever heard in your damn life. It nearly made you fall off your chair running to your room to masturbate, but you decided against it. The night's still young after all.
The chapter stuck with you though. Because it wasn't all that horny because of the actual sex happening, but more because of the love between the characters. To be desired so carnally, to be loved so openly, is a fucking turn on.
'You look beautiful,' he notes, taking all of your thoughts away with one look. The way his eyes rake over you, you feel like you're a marble statue in a museum. Loved, admired, valued, but most of all, beautiful. A blush spreads on your cheeks.
'Thank you. You look nice too.'
'Just nice?'
'Stunning.' The nerves don't calm down and you're not sure why. You've already had him in your bed, you kissed him, cuddled him, let him... Why are you blushing at the thought of it now? Is it because this is a proper date? It's not even that serious. It's just dinner and a movie at his place.
'Ready?' He offers you his arm. You nod and place your hand on his forearm. It's awfully proper, but it does feel very nice to be treated so respectfully.
'I have to say, I was expecting a kiss,' you admit. He grins and leans down to press a soft kiss on your lips. Nothing special, just a gentle greeting from a lover.
A lover? No, more than that. It feels like home. Like you've been kissing his lips for years, but the spark is still there. Like this is how it's meant to be. Like he is completely and utterly in love with you, and you feel the same.
Shit, you're in love.
Sylus leads you into his apartment. The one time you were in there, you didn't really take in his decor. It's very much him. The whole place is made up of black, white, some dark wood tones, yet it still feels warm. It might be because he has taken a page out of your book with all the candles he's lit around the apartment. The dining table is set beautifully. There's red wine on the table already, along with a beautiful bouquet of deep red roses that look almost velvety. There's some music playing that feels slightly suggestive but not enough to comment on.
'Wow, you really went all you,' you note. You feel his arm slip from your grasp and around your waist to pull you closer against him. He looks down at you with the lightest flicker of a big smile.
'For you, I'd rearrange the stars if you asked me to. Now go sit down. Food will be ready in a bit.'
Sylus stands behind the stove while you take a seat at the table. Of course, you take the seat across from the kitchen so you can watch him work. The way he slightly is swaying and softly humming along with the music is truly a vision to behold. A domestic vision. A vision of a future you'd like to live.
He looks over his shoulder, seeing you leaning on your palm, elbow on the table, staring at him. You feel your cheeks heat up again but no urge to look away. Instead, you smile at him and he smiles back. He picks up the pan and walks over to the table, setting it down in the middle between the two plates.
'Pasta alla Norma. Say when,' he says as he starts dishing out the food on your plate. You nod your head to him after a bit, having a very generous portion of pasta on your plate. He does the same for himself and grabs the wine to uncork it. All of it goes so smooth, so fluent, like every motion of his is perfected.
And so is the food. It's not that special of a pasta dish but it's made so damn well. 'Is there anything you can't do,' you joke, 'I might just have to marry you right here and now.' His lips quirk into a smile.
'Are you sure, sweetie? We barely know each other,' he teases back, 'what if I turn out to be a serial killer?'
'Then I'd die a happy death.' Even though you are joking, somewhere in the back of your mind you know that it's true. You've never had a connection to anyone before like you have with him. It's new and exciting, but most of all it feels right.
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The dinner is mostly uneventful, except that Sylus got some sauce on his clothes. He claimed it was because he was admiring you, but you saw him struggle to get the bite on his fork properly. However, this one time you decided not to tease him because you do want to cuddle up to him during the movie.
At least, that was the plan. Pure innocent cuddling.
Seems Sylus has different plans. You're sitting leaned against him, knees pulled up onto his lap, his arm around you, but for about ten odd minutes now his free hand has been tracing figured on your thigh. Each passing moment he seems to get a little bit closer to your inner thigh.
The teasing gets you hot and bothered, which only makes Sylus smirk. You don't have to look up at him to know. He moves his other hand from your shoulder to your waist, his thumb gently rubbing your skin so that your shirt starts riding up until you feel his touch on your skin.
That's when he shoves his other hand between your thighs, so close to your core, pulling a gasp from your lips. As you smack your hand in front of your mouth and look up, you can already feel Sylus’ laugh rumbling through his chest. You won't stand for that shit.
With one swift movement, you sit yourself on his lap. Hands gently draped over his shoulders; hips so close to his but not quite close enough. He hooks his hands under your thighs and pulls you right on top of his bulge. The friction makes you gasp, but you try to keep a straight face.
'We're not watching the movie, are we,' he asks suggestively. You move your hands to the buttons of his shirt and start undoing them slowly, one by one. In response, his hands start roaming over your hips, your thighs, they grace your ass and lower back. You feel yourself start to grind against him ever so slightly. It's almost involuntarily and gets more intense when you see how much Sylus is blushing while trying to keep a straight face.
'Don't know why you're asking me. You're the one who started it.' Your hands get to the bottom button that you can still see. Instead of undoing it, you splay your hands out over his stomach, exploring all the skin you've freed as you rake your nails over the lean muscles on his stomach.
'Mmm, I know sweetie, but consent is sexy,' he groans, moving his head towards your shoulder, he presses a kiss under your ear, 'do I have your consent?'
'You do,' you say breathlessly, moving your hands behind his neck, entangling your fingers in his hair as you grind on him a little harder. He gently bites the spot he just kissed as a reply and grips your hips roughly, guiding you over him while he bucks up at you. His breathing becomes labored as you two dry fuck like a bunch of horny teenagers.
He moves his head to kiss your lips. It's all tongue and teeth, desperately chasing a high. Somewhere in your mind you had expected Sylus to be cool, calm, collected when it comes to sex, but seeing him this excited because of you gives you confidence the likes of which you have never experienced.
Suddenly, he drops his head back to your shoulder and bites down as his movements become less rhythmic. He stops moving all together and looks up at you with big eyes, staring up at you like you're made of pure stardust.
'Did you just-'
'Yes.'
'Because-'
'Because an angel was riding me.' A grin spreads across your face. He came in his pants like a fucking teenager because of you. That's so fucking hot. If he starts praising you any more you might just become a nightmare to deal with.
'Wanna do it again without clothes?'
'More than you could ever imagine.' He grabs your ass and stands up with you in his arms. A yelp slips from your lips as you quickly grab his shoulders. There's that smirk again. Shit, this could be the switch Olympics at this point, that way that you keep flipping.
Being in Sylus’ bedroom is slightly strange. You've seen it from all angels before, even though you've never been there before. He lays you down on his bed and you see yourself looking back on the ceiling. For a second, your mind is completely lost until you realize that there's mirrors on his ceiling. Strangely, that doesn't surprise you in the slightest.
Then, you see Sylus taking off his shirt. You prop yourself up on your elbows and watch him as he undoes the button on his jeans. A devious idea pops into your head and you grab his hand to stop him.
He watches you intensively as you switch places with him so he is seated at the edge of the bed. His eagerness to touch you has a hold on him but he's trying so hard to let you do whatever. You take his hands and guide them to the hem of your shirt. Then, you slide them up. He quickly catches on and helps you take your shirt off, revealing a beautiful black lace bra.
'Shit,' he cusses under his breath, tossing your shirt somewhere in the corner. His hands move to your jeans and undo the button and zipper. One peek at your matching undies has him groaning. He helps you step out of your jeans and grabs your hips gently, pulling you towards him. You put your hands on either sides of his face. His eyes are on yours, but they keep flickering down to your lips while his thumbs gently rub your hips. 'All this for me?'
'All for you.' Your voice comes out sultry, seductive. Nothing you've ever sounded like before. He wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you against him, and kisses you slowly.
'You look beautiful,' he mumbles against your lips, drunk off your body and the lingering thought of being inside it. He finally peels himself off your body and switches sides with you again. 'Lay down. I'll be right back.'
'Don't leave me,' you whine as you grab his hand. He stops for a second, physically restraining himself.
'Condom,' he says and lets go of your hand, disappearing into the bathroom. You decide to sit on your knees in the middle of the bed, eagerly awaiting his return while you soak through your panties. It takes him less than a minute to come back, and when he does his jeans are already off. You eye his bulge with your mouth slightly agape. Sure, you had seen it before, but everything looks smaller on a phone screen. He catches the worry in your eyes as he puts one knee on the bed to be closer to you. 'We don't have to-'
'Shut up,' you quip, 'I'll be fine. Just go slow.' There's that grin again. With one hand, he reaches behind you and unhooks your bra with ease, with the other he hands you the condom, then he guides you onto your back. You try to take off your bra as you lay, but he grabs your hand and guides it to his hair. For a second, you don't understand but then he dips his head down and starts kissing your chest, slowly making his way over your clothed nipple and kissing it, leaving a wet spot on the lace. With his other hand he pushes the straps off your shoulders.
Within seconds you are reduces to a whimpering, moaning mess. Your legs spread to make room for him and he gratefully takes his place between them. Sylus finally grabs the bra and removes it, joining it with your shirt and pants on the floor. His hand returns to your breast quickly, his hand gently massaging it while his lips make their way down lower.
Slowly but surely, he reaches your panties and places lingering kisses just above them. Your hips buck up towards him and you hear the rumble of his rich chuckle. 'Sweetie, you know what you do to me. I fear I might not survive if I spend all my time between your legs.'
'And I fear I might not survive if you don't fuck me right now,' you groan, giving a firm thug on his hair. You hear him gasp and it goes straight to your pussy. You cuss under your breath as you look down at the smug smile he wears. His fingers hook under your panties and pull them off. They join your other clothing on the floor.
'You're soaked,' he notes, satisfied.
'And you're not inside me yet.' Another rumbling laugh as he reaches for his own boxers and pulls them off in a swift motion. Shit, he's big and... are those-
'They'll feel good. Trust me,' he promises as he watches you look at the two piercings making up his frenum ladder. You reach out to touch it and he lets you. He shivers under your touch as you run your hand over the metal beats on the underside of his dick.
'One of these days I'm going to make you fuck me raw,' you say, not really realizing what you're saying as you're completely enamored with his dick and piercings.
'You can't say stuff like that. I'm trying to go slow,' he almost gasps for air with every word and snatches the condom from your hand to quickly roll it on. You watch him lean over you, one of his hands firmly planted next to your head, the other guiding his cock towards your entrance.
'Fuck slow.' You wrap your legs around him, pulling him towards you. He slips inside easily but goddamn it's a fucking stretch to say the very least. All you can hear is a mixed chorus of groans and gasps. He doesn't move his hips as his eyes study your face, fearing the discomfort he sees might be too much for you. However, you could care less. You feel so incredibly full and ecstatic to be spending the night with him that you might just burst right now. You reach out for him, grabbing his shoulders to pull him down for a kiss.
'Are you alright,' he asks, holding off the kiss until he has your ok, 'I'm all the way in.'
'I'm fine. Just kiss me and please move. I need it so fucking bad,' you beg. He does as you say, crashing his lips on yours as he sets a painfully slow tempo to get you used to him. You feel like you're going to snap if he keeps this up. 'Please move faster.' Your words sound more like a moan.
'Are you sure, sweetie? You seem to be enjoying it just fine.' He looks down at you with pure amusement. Seems he's in a mood. You quickly shove his arm and manage to turn him on his back, not that he puts up much of a fight.
'I thought you wanted me on top,' you tease back, sheeting yourself on his dick in one motion before he can even respond. Sylus lets out a low groan, throwing his head back and clawing at your hips for something to hold on to. 'Are you going to be a good boy for me and let me ride you?'
'What happens if I say no.'
'You'll have to find out.' He nods in response and makes himself comfortable on the pillows. You take that as your go ahead and set an absolutely feral pace. He was right about those piercings. They feel amazing.
The horniest gasp you've ever heard slips from Sylus’ lips as he turns bright red in the face. His hands move down to your thighs, nails digging into your skin. You'll certainly have bruises tomorrow.
'Does that feel good,' you ask him as you lean down a little, planting your hands on his chest, nails raking over his pecs.
'Yes,' he moans, looking absolutely beautifully drunk on you. You feel your high approaching, as does he from what you can tell. He's so close to unraveling and it's beautiful. You wish you could capture this moment, keep this feeling bottled up on your nightstand.
His hands move back to your hips as he suddenly plants his heels against the mattress and starts trusting up into you, hitting new highs deep inside of you. Highs that no one has ever hit before. Highs that you want him to hit each and every day. He's addicting. Your whole body is tingling as you lean closer towards him, trying to keep up with his pace while you kiss him. He seems too focused to kiss you properly. It's a mess of spit, biting, teeth clanking, and it's so fucking hot. You lick down his neck as you feel your high approaching so fucking fast.
And there it goes. You hear an animalistic groan next to you, feel it rumble through his chest as his motions become sloppier. Your body topples over the edge and in a moment of absolute bliss, to suppress the absolutely vile sounds you make, you bite down on his shoulder. Hard. Sylus moans at the pain, grabbing your ass to push your body down against him, holding you in place speared on his cock.
Waves of pleasure shake through your body as Sylus presses sweet kisses on top of your head. His hips move ever so slightly, helping you ride it out. Your eyelids start feeling heavy, your body is aching, your pussy is clenching up.
'Are you alright?' Sylus voice is different now. It sounds almost worried. You release his shoulder from your bite and prop yourself up on his chest.
'Peachy,' you reply with a hazy smile, 'wanna take a nap and do it again in a few hours?'
There goes that rumbling laugh of his again. His hands start rubbing your back as he leans up to peck your lips. It's such an innocent gesture if you don't think about the fact that his dick is still inside you, twitching with every single tiny movement you make. 'As much as I would like that. Let's give it a few more hours and do it again in the morning. Deal?'
'Only if we take a shower together.'
'I'll do you one better. I have a tub.'
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#lads sylus#l&ds sylus#lnds sylus#sylus#love and deepspace sylus#sylus love and deepspace#sylus x reader#sylus x mc#sylus x fem!reader#lads sylus smut#l&ds sylus smut#lnds sylus smut#sylus smut#love and deepspace sylus smut#sylus love and deepspace smut#sylus x reader smut#sylus x mc smut#sylus x fem!reader smut#lads sylus fanfiction#l&ds sylus fanfiction#lnds sylus fanfiction#sylus fanfiction#love and deepspace sylus fanfiction#sylus love and deepspace fanfiction#sylus x reader fanfiction#sylus x mc fanfiction#sylus x fem!reader fanfiction#lads sylus fanfic#l&ds sylus fanfic#lnds sylus fanfic
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accidentally posted, anyway here u go @mrsarnold
warning(s): smut
genre: smut
pairing(s): kk arnold x reader
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"baby!" kk yelled from your shared bedroom, "yea?" you yelled back as you got up from the couch and made your way into the room. the moment you walked in you could tell kk needed you. the way she was looking you up and down, the way she leaned back on the bed, just everything about her. “what?” you asked, already knowing what she wanted. “come here.” she said as she sat up a little bit more. you walked over to her and her hands flew to your waist the second you were in reach. you leaned down a bit to kiss her, your hands instinctively grabbing her face. the needy kiss quickly turned into making out and you went from stand next to her to straddling her.
kk pulled away, looking you in the eye, “let’s try something new.” she proposed, looking a little scared to ask. “like what?” you questioned. you were thinking of all of the things she could’ve been referring to and you weren’t sure what she would say. “are you willing to try sitting on my face?” she asked, still looking scared. your eyes widened and you smiled softly at her question. “yes but i’m a little scared to suffocate you.” you admitted honestly. “girl, you’ll be okay.” she smiled, rubbing your waist. “okay but if you need to stop at any time just,” you thought for a moment, “tap me twice and i’ll get up.”
that interaction was about 5 minutes ago and now you were hovering over kk’s mouth, far enough not to kill her but close enough for her to eat you. the new position had you screaming on the inside, on the outside you were moaning way louder than usual. you weren’t sure why your body was having this much of a reaction to getting ate you by your girlfriend like she hasn’t done this plenty of times before, you were think that maybe it was because she could eat all of you and nothing was left unlicked, maybe it was because it was just a new position so things just felt better, you still weren’t sure and you honestly didn’t care.
kk noticed you were hovering and attempted to pull you down but you tried to fight it. “stop.” she said, face full of your pussy. the way she sounded so serious turned you on expeditiously. you let her do her thing and being close to her felt so much better, she had you gripping the headboard with your head thrown back moaning her name. at this point you didn’t care if other people heard you two, you just needed to cum all over kk’s pretty face. her tongue was switching back and forth from sucking your clit to thrusting in your hole and it felt so good. the closer you got to cumming the harder you gripped the head bored and the more and louder you moaned. after you came you got off of you and sat on bed, slightly out of breath. you looked over at kk who was catching also her breath. everywhere under her nose and including her nose were dripping wet with your cum.
“we should’ve done that sooner.” kk says as she gets up to wipe her face and to get something to clean you off with. “you don’t want me to give you anything?” you ask as she leaves, completely ignoring her previous comment. “no i’m good.” she replied and continued to walk out. she came back a few minutes later with the towel and cleaned you up. as she was cleaning you, you couldn’t stop admiring her. she looked so good even though she wasn’t doing much. “what?” she questioned with a smile, “nothing, i can’t admire my girlfriend?” you replied back with a smile. kk took the towel and put it in the dirty laundry then after she got you new clothes. after you got changed and she cleaned up anything else, you guys cuddled for the rest of the night.
==================================
i hope you guys enjoyed and i hope you have a good day/night, love you 💋💋
#uconn wbb#uconn huskies#uconn women’s basketball#kk arnold x fem!reader#kk arnold x reader#kk arnold#wlw#wlw post#smut#kamii-2
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Miraculous Main Character Ranking
Just like how I ranked the designs of superheroes for Miraculous Ladybug... now, I will be ranking the characters as a whole. Although design will be a small factor in some of this cases... it mostly has to do with the characters themselves this time. How enjoyable I think they are based on the show, its writting, the circumstances they have been put through, their purposes and, most importantly, my personal opinion.
Also, although i will be ranking this characters, I would like to say, before you guys read the ranking, that I don't actually hate any character here.
They are mostly victims of bad writting from Thomas Astruc, his team, and their lack of understanding on how teams interact with each other, and what interactions are okay and others not.
That's why I feel sympathy towards all of them. But, I understand if you don't.
These are characters from a show made for kid. Please, be respectful with my opinions, and I will be respectful with yours.
Also, if you are either a Marinette , Adrien, Felix or Chloe stan... please, don't look at my ranking, okay?
So, with nothing else to add... Let's begin!
(I hope I don't get destroyed for my opinions).
21- Socqueline Wang
... Can someone please explain me WHY she exists?
Socqueline is one of the characters that miraculous introduces later on for a specific reason, and then doesn't get used later.
However, out of all of these characters... Socqueline is the worst.
Although the idea of Marinette having a friend before Alya, but then moved away/got transferred is interesting, but they add her on SEASON 5!
She and Marinette were supposedly best buddies, and Socqueline was always there to "protect her from the irredeemable monster Chloe bwahhaaa", and yet, she doesn't visit Marinette ONCE in a period of 4 seasons?! Not a photo, not a mention... anything.
The worst part is how they try to make us fans believe that "she has always been here", like in episodes such as "Perfection" when she is added to the group of Kagami's friends.
But, besides "Jubilation" and even worse "Derision" her character has no purpose or impact to the story.
Marinette already has a group of female friends (Alya, Rose, Juleka, Mylene, Alix, Kagami, Zoe, and probably Sabrina on season 6) with badly developed relationships. Do we need one more girl on this mess?
I UNDERSTAND that she is supposed to be a reference to PV!Marinette, that Bridgette was just a name we, the fandom, gave her, and it was supposed to be fan-service, but... the way they made it makes no sense.
Socqueline could have been deleted from season 5 and it wouldn't have changed a thing.
youtube
A famous miraculous brazillian youtuber actually had an idea for the purpose the Socqueline could have had in season 5.
His idea (which I also enjoy) is that she, instead of Alya, should have been the one to use Tikki in the "Kwami's Choice" special.
Hawk Moth had already found out that she wasn't Ladybug in "Jubilation", she had no previous connections to Ladybug, and had the desire to be a hero.
This way, hero's choice could also expand on her as a character, explain why she hasn't spoken to Marinette in so long, her own fears and wished for the future...
And maybe... just MAYBE getting a crush on Kitty Noir as the new Ladybug, and, meeting Zoe later after losing the earrings, and getting attracted to her due to reasons she can't explain.
But no, she has the charisma and the importance of a cardboard. I am 75% sure that she will be forgotten in Season 6, and might be "replaced" by Sublime. Who knows.
As for her design... I feel like they did a good job in showing that Socqueline is PV!Marinete, while also making her unique enough in a way.
20- Felix Fathom
Although Socqueline is the most pointless... Felix is the worst character, definetely.
On his first episode, he lies, steals his cousin's phone, tries to ruin his friendship, tries to force Ladybug into kissing him, tries to make a deal with Hawkmoth, and steal's Gabriel's wedding ring... not a good start, right?
The episode's explanation, according to what some character's say, is that he is going through a rough phase because he hasn't been processing his father's death well, and that without his father's authority, he has been "out of control".
This will be important further on.
On his second episode, he is obsessed with finding Hawk Moth's identity, seeing it as a way to get what he wants. Then, again, he gives a wicked smile after he feels like he is winning.
On his third appearence, he uses Gabriel's wedding ring to CONTROL his cousin to agree with his plan, pretends to be Adrien, gets the Dog Miraculous, and uses it to give all the miraculous on the box to Gabriel...
Then, Season 5 arrives, and Felix erases the population of Earth, becomes an almost yandere for Kagami, and becomes a "good boy" because he is just misunderstood and Kagami's love fixed him. There is also the plot of his activism for Sentimonsters...
Do I need to explain myself on why I hate this character?
From the moment he appeared on screen, he has done nothing but caused chaos. And his cause of helping sentimonsters? Pretty hypocrite, considering how he controlled Adrien in "Risk", and tried to ruin his friendships in "Felix".
He is not a confused anti-hero with a noble cause in need of guidence... he is straight up a resentful villain who is unleashing his frustrations on others.
And all the chaos he caused is suddenly forgiven because of his redemption and his abusive father?
Also... where does this Abusive father came from? His debut implied that Colt's death was what bittered Felix's heart. And that he was the one to keep Felix in control.
It either means that the crew thinks that Colt's abusive behavior was good because it keep Felix in line, or that they came up with that last moment to give him a redemption.
I will be going with the latter, because, oh GOSH, the writers put all their effort into redeeming Felix this season.
This boy over here has committed crimes and the show pet him on the head. Meanwhile, school bullies get sent to live with their abusive parent.
His design is great. He is supposed to look just like Adrien, and he clearly looks more formal.
19- Lila Rossi
Lila is... a lot like Felix, actually. She is bitter, manipulative, and always want to have the upper hand.
However, unlike Felix, that the show refuses to portray as a villain, the show actually knows that Lila is bad.
Still... they literally had no idea of what to do with her and went of the rails with her "arc".
When 'Volpina" aired, Lila was just a liar who wanted popularity and came up with the weirdest stories possible to make herself look better.
The class was infatuated by her, which, made sense considering she was new and all.
Then, the whole Ladybug fiasco happened and she became Volpina. Then, on the end of the episode, the writers hinted at Lila returning eventually and becoming a bigger threat...
And she disappears... for a whole season to be precise.
I remember how the fandom was excited to see Lila in action on season 2. Since many were expecting Chloe to be redeemed (since we had no idea how the Queen bee arc would play like), many started to assume that Lila would be the one causing akumas this season.
Which, would have been interesting! We were so used to the formula of Chloe bullying other until they turned into supervillains, that it would be interesting seeing how Lila would operate.
But, she disappeared and only returned when she was needed on Heroes Day.
Then, season 3 arrived, and boy, things got bad quickly.
The class still adores her (to an unnatural degree, tbh), she gets away with all of her stunts, ruins Marinette's reputation, gets Kagami akumatized and makes a deal with Gabriel.
Lila's plot armor this season is WILD. She brags about everything she does, there is proof that she was a part of Heroes Day instead of travelling as she stated (the illusion, and, even if people assumed there was another akuma with this power, considering the event was televisioned, she must have appeared at least one), and she, a teenage girl, impresses Hawk Moth to the point of him wanting her as an ally...
And she never faces the consequences of her actions. Except Onichan.
Then, after all the chaos she caused in season 3... she is benched on season 4, only to return with an even stronger plot armor in the season finale.
Alya somehow believes on her, even is she knows Ladybug's identity and who the real best friend is; and Lila managed to make an alliance with Chloe. WITH CHLOE.
Chloe, the girl who couldn't stand Marinette or Kagami 5 centimeters near Adrien. This Chloe, who probably saw Lila flirting with Adrien already at least once, makes an alliance with her.
The explanation? Chloe can't remember Lila from how "irrevalant" she is.
... do you guys get what I am saying? She has insane levels of plot armor!
Season 5 is when the writers literally gave up on keeping her consistent.
Now, she is an unstable girl cutting photos with Marinette's face, getting Kagami (one of the few people that disliked her) on her side, puts a teenage girl on the position of a mayor, and, am I forgetting something... oh yeah! She is literally crazy, may not even be a teenage girl, and has multiple identities and mothers...
This character makes no sense, her escalation into a supervillain comes out of nowhere, and, the moments we EXPECT her to be a villain, she isn't, and only appears way later.
Considering how much the plot protects her, I don't doubt that it will take at least 6 more seasons to defeat her.
Lila's design in general is okay with the exception of the hair... what's up with her hair? Like, she has 3 "ponytails". Does anyone actually use this hair and I just don't know it?
18- Chloe Bourgeois
Behold, the most incosistent character on this whole show.
I like to say that "Chloe" is not a character. It's a title giving to many identical looking characters that swap places depending on what the plot explains.
The First Chloe is season 1 Chloe, who is your typical mean girl. She bullies other students, is superficial... but, she is mostly a harmless thing. She is just mean, and the akumas all go after her on the end of the episode.
The Second Chloe is the Chloe of episode "Malekdiktator". This Chloe is a sensitive and fragile. She just feels lonely and purposeless.
The Third Chloe is the sassy anti-hero Chloe. She helps Ladybug and Chat Noir as Queen Bee, and can act kindly from time to time. But, she will still be occasionally mean and insult your clothing.
The Fourth Chloe is season 4 Chloe, who is like the first Chloe, but instead of having some depth and realism to her... she is now just pure evil. She trapped Sabrina in her closet and treats Andre like a slave.
The Fifth Chloe is season 5!Chloe, who is a heartless monster that becomes a dictator as soon as she can, becomes Hawk Moth's ally, and incriminates others to get her way.
The writing keeps changing Chloe to what they need her to be. There is no progressive transition or any signs of an arc.
She is a plot point which the writers will never let go.
As for her design... it's pretty iconic, not gonna lie.
17- Kagami Tsurugi
Man, it hurts me putting Kagami this low on the list... but the writers ruined her character.
When Kagami was introduced, she wasn't much different from the majority of the secondary cast.
All we knew is that she came from a strict family and that she was a perfectionist. She is very hard on herself, and wants to make her mother proud.
But as time progressed, the show showed how fierce and determined she could be and that even people like Lila and Chloe could get in the way of the things she wanted (Sadly, most of the time, her goal is Adrien, not a prizer or anything).
Then, Ikari Gozen happened, and we finally saw a new side of Kagami. How lonely she felt, how awkward she could be out of her comfort zone, and that, although she had her issues with Marinette, she wanted to have her as a friend.
On Season 4, she stays mostly the same, although, I feel even more sympathy towards her because Adrien was such a bad boyfriend to her.
(Seriously, Adrien dating Kagami while still having feelings for Ladybug, and Marinette dating Luka while still having feeling for Adrien was a mess that the show never acknowledged).
Season 5, however... things go downhill for her.
Before, she used to be one of the few people to not fall for Lila's, due to her intelligence and strategic thinking. But, now, she is one of Lila's MAIN puppets for the season.
But the worst is probably the relationship with Felix.
Kagami, GIRL, that boy gave the most powerful artifacts in the universe to a Terrorist. He erased human life from the face of the planet. It's not because he saved you from his mother that it makes him a good person deep down!
Man, Kagami was such a confident queen in the past, who knew who to trust... and they turned her into this mess during season 5.
If I was to rank Season 3-4 Kagami, she would be way higher on the list.
But Feligami destroyed her reputation.
I have a few issues with her design. The hair looks weird, and... the damn uniform. A lot of people comment on how her uniform is because of japanese steryotypes and I hate it.
16- Marinette Dupain-Cheng
Okay, before starting my explanation, I would like to disclaim a few things first.
Marinette as character, seems to be constantly having a hard time.
She has the most powerful miraculous, Chat Noir indeed doesn't treat things as seriously as he should, she becomes the guardian way younger than she should, and she has to carry a lot of weight for a girl her age.
Just like we saw in Steven from Steven Universe, this kind of responsibility indeed can lead to an unstable mental health.
And there is also the fact that Marinette only acts the way she does, because Miraculous a whole isn't good at executing ideas.
BUT, even with all of this... it is still very hard to defend her actions.
At season 1, at least, she was mostly just a fangirl. She didn't have the healthies behavior around Adrien, but, she still had salvation. And let's not forget that she was punished (at least, to some degree) by the narrative when she did something wrong (like in "Bubbler", when Tikki reprehends the way she used the Lucky Charm to stop Chloe from kissing Adrien, or when her reckless behavior as Ladybug led to Lila's akumatization on "Volpina).
Season 2 Marinette starts to do some questionable things, like leading Luka on, and keeping Chat Noir in the dark about the Guardian. Although, to be fair, she only kept secrets from Chat Noir because of Fu. She should have insisted more, but, it's not the worst she has done.
Then, on Season 3, Marinette goes off the rails. We have Animaestro, where she joins forces with Chloe to break Kagami, and Adrien, becomes overly paranoid with the Lila situation to the point of being obsessive with proving she is a liar. There is the Wax museum scene...
Season 4 Marinette is where I am torn about. In one hand, yes, she leaves the 4 kids she was supposed to be babysitting with her grandfather to be with Adrien, keeps a lot of info from Chat Noir, makes a whole plan to invade a party at Adrien's house, gives Adrien a miraculous although it already failed, and her whole relationship with Luka.
But, on the other hand... the girl is having the worst time of her life. She is guarding a bunch of small gods as a teenage girl, can't trust anyone, has no mentor to help her figure things out or to vent too, and needs to keep "Chat Blanc" a secret so that Chat Noir doesn't get akumatized. And Hawk Moth fixed the Peacock and he is a more dangerous threat (well, in-universe, that is).
And there was some logic as to why she chose "Adrien" to wield the Dog in "Strikeback". He had no mark, she was under Risk's influence and so on... (the part where she says that Flaimidable is an official part of the team pisses me off, though, cause, Miss Hound debuted AN EPISODE BEFORE).
Season 5 is where her mental health is finally at the bottom, and, combined with the fact she seems to be going back and forth of who she wants to be with (Adrien, Chat Noir and Luka in a way), she does a lot of bad decisions.
However, there is a limit to how many things a bad mental health can excuse. She kind of manipulated Chat Noir's feelings to get him to kiss her.
However, to be honest, if Astruc learned his lesson on how he can't write Marinette like a Stalker and overly jealous girlfriend, and tried to improve her portrayal on the next seasons, I could TRY to forgive her...
But then, Sublimation came.
Even after all the fans complaints, the forced backstory in Derision to try to justify her behavior, and the promise of starting a new arc... Marinette ends up breaking a girl's prosthetic leg because of Adrien.
In the end, even if I can see the archetype they were going for when creating Marinette, girl, I can't defend you and your jealousy!
Seriously, some of the things you did probably can be considered crimes.
(If I am forgetting something, please comment on the post. I don't have energy to search ALL the questionable things Marinette did on the show).
Her design isn't bad, but... the pigtails are childish, and the outfit looks like a simple pajama. Since she is a fashion designer, I expected something more.
15- Nino Lahiffe
Man, Nino... what have the writers done to you?
Nino on season 1 was Adrien's best friend who tried to teach him how to relax and have fun.
He was this chill guy who dated Alya and spoke a lot of "dude". He was never the most profound character, but, he was quite sweet.
On season 2, during "Anansi", Nino shows how much he care for Alya and gets the turtle miraculous.
Then, he becomes basically irrelevant in season 3. It felt like the writers have no idea of what to do with him anymore.
Probably because, since Adrien has less runtime than Marinette, Nino get's basically zero focus, since the show only cares for him as Adrien's best friend and Alya's boyfriend.
If this wasn't bad enough on its own already,at season 4, Nino gets turned into a toxic boyfriend, revealing him and Rena Rouge's identity in a moment of rage.
Then, at season 5, he starts the whole idea of the resistance... and his plans are... questionable to say the least.
I honestly feel bad for Nino. The writers don't seem to care for him for who he is, and all of his arcs are dependant on other characters.
The show doesn't show his own inner struggles, ambitions, or his home life. Which makes him very shallow.
I know that Astruc once commented that Nino has an older brother who has disappeared and gave him the hat before going missing, and that's why Nino was sad when Chamaleon stole it.
But, they never done anything with it in the show which makes Nino's character empty.
I wish the show had treated him better, but man, "Rocketear" and "Illusion" really damaged his image.
Nino's design is solid. I think it shows his chill personality well.
14- Adrien Agreste
Just like with Marinette, I would like to disclaim a few things.
I know Adrien has a complex home life. I know that all the sheltering from his parents made him a bit socially awkward. I know that Chat Noir is the only way he can truly be himself. AND I KNOW THE SENTIMONSTER PLOT KEPT HIM FROM HAVING AN INTEREST ARC.
Season 1 Adrien is... pretty wishy-washy. Although he is "nice" and he cares for his friends... he doesn't do much. A lot of that has to do with the fact Gabriel barely lets him out of the Manor, but, it doesn't excuse things such as him being friends with Chloe, even after she bullies not only Marinette, but Juleka, Mylene, Rose, Kim, and, honestly, everyone at the class.
As Chat Noir... he is a good enough hero. Cataclysm here was still useful, and he had his moments. Although his recklessness caused a lot of problems for Ladybug from time to time, and he didn't learn anything with it.
And let's not forget that he lied he was dating Ladybug just so Theo wouldn't flirt with her. Some people headcanon this as him protecting Ladybug (who he though was a minor) from an adult.
But let's be fair, Theo is probably their age in-universe, and Chat just did it out of jealousy. Which, was a bit of a dick move, but, not the worst thing he pulled out.
On season 2 he started to get a bit annoying. As Adrien, he keeps finding ways of defending Chloe, and "lecturing" how people shouldn't be happy with her leaving which... I understand he feels bad about his first friend leaving Paris, but, he can't explain the rest of the class should feel bad about it.
Chloe has been straight up BULLYING AND TORTURING the class for years, and everyone there had a right to be happy.
As Chat Noir, his jealousy becomes a problem with his character. Yes, Ladybug isn't exactly a great partner all the time, but he could try to remain professional instead of pouting.
Season 3 cements Adrien's character as a bland cardboard. Sorry, but his way of dealing with Lila wasn't good either. Like, if Lila's lies was harmless, I would understand the "high road idea", but she was straight up taking advantage of everyone. Lila's situation could have ended badly if they didn't take any action.
He does seem to change his stance on her a bit during "Onichan" and "Ladybug", but, it only affects the plot on season 5.
Then, season 4 happens, and boy, it isn't good for his image.
First, his whole relationship with Kagami is a mess. He CLEARLY has feelings for Ladybug while he is dating her. Like, he considers causing an akumatization on lies just because he is bored and wants to see her.
The scene with the yellow rose meant nothing on the special if Adrien would pull up a stunt like that on the second episode of the season.
As Chat Noir, he becomes so whiny this season. Like yeah, I understand Ladybug could put more trust on him, but, at this point, he should expect some secrets.
Season 5, surprisingly, is when Adrien's character actually gets a bit interesting.
Now that he is crushing on Marinette, and not Ladybug, we see him taking initiative as Adrien instead of Chat Noir. Which actually gives him a bit of development and depth...
Sadly, what holds him back is the sentimonster plot.
Meanwhile, Chat Noir this season is pretty ignored and forgotten by the plot. So, nothing to say about him.
Summing up my thoughts about Adrien: it's not his fault the way he is, but, most of the time, he whines or throws jealous tantrums.
Adrien's design is not bad, but... it's plain. It isn't that fashionable for the son of a designer, and it doesn't show his personality either.
13- Marc Anciel
You might be wondering why Marc is on the half of the list of characters that I don't like... and it's because I don't like him, sorry.
Like, Reverser was an interesting episode. The akuma was creative, and, since Marc was a writer, it was a way for the fanfic writers fan to relate to him...
HOWEVER, Marc suffers from an issue. It isn't new to us that the miraculous writers are not the best in characterization, and sometimes, many characters can feel the same.
Marc feels like he is just a more friendly version with Nathaniel. And whenever he appears, he is WITH Nathaniel. And they act like a hivemind.
This makes Marc feels less like a character and more like an extension of Nathaniel.
He doesn't feel original, and the fact that he only has a prominent role in 3 episodes (one of which is Gabriel Agreste, where his role was a mess), doesn't make him any more interesting.
And the fact that he is a part of Mendeleeive's class doesn't help at all, considering everyone there barely has cameos, and I doubt the show's team sees the majoirty of them as actual characters.
Then, in Penalteam, someway somehow, even with how little emphasis he had through the show, he got a miraculous...
Seriously, the writers made Chloe evil only so that there was a spare miraculous for Marc? When Zoe could have gotten the rooster?
(I usually only keep Marc as the rooster holder in my AUs cause 1, I like the design, and 2, he is the only confirmed writer on the teen cast).
There is also the fact that Marc was inspired by a person that was allegedly friends with Astruc, and that Astruc allegedly treated badly. This kind of sours the character even more to me.
And last, but not least... I don't like the design. It isn't the outfit, I just think that his face and his hair don't mix well.
It's mostly due to the hair, I think, because I love the combo of his bone structure with his Rooster Bold hair.
I personally like @maddascanbe-blog 's take on marc, because they adjust the face shape and the hair to make a better combo.
But, before moving on to the next character, I would like to state that I don't judge anyone who likes Marc as a character.
Again, he is a character who writes, and the miraculous fandom is known for its large amount of fanfiction and rewrites. He is a shy character that is also slightly geeky.
I understand why people like Marc, @artzychic27 has a lot of stories expanding on the character and creating a bunch of interesting headcanons in the process.
It's just that the character doesn't work for me.
Still, I think he deserved better.
12- Kim Ature
Kim is a character that angers me a lot.
And not because of Derision. Far from it, actually.
Kim, from the start, had questionable behaviors that he could have learned from and improved. But, the show kinds of ignores his past mistakes.
He is very insensitive with the feelings of his friends, like how we saw in Stoneheart, where he is literally mocking Ivan, a boy that clearly has low self-stem, because he can't confess his feelings.
And "Timebreaker" reveals that he is known for pressuring his friends into dares that no one seems to enjoy. Reason why Alix dares him into a race to see if she can stop him.
He is not a jerk, nor a bully, but, he clearly lacks emotional intelligence.
Does the show does anything interesting with it? No, it doesn't. We never see him apologizing to Ivan, or trying to empathize with his classmates.
He doesn't have any arc and it's sad.
He is only higher on the list, because there are moments where Kim is actually enjoyable. And because I know he isn't a bad person.
Just wish the show actually tried to give him something.
His design fits him perfectly, and I can't imagine him any other way.
11- Alya Cesaire
I feel like the fandom has a weird view on Alya.
Most of the complaints I see is when people call her a bad friend and things like this.
However, I don't exactly see Alya as a bad friend. Her believing Lila is mostly due to bad writing. and, although she can be a bit pushy when it comes to Marinette's love life... literally the entire cast (but Zoe, as shown in Kwami's Choice) is.
My main problem with Alya is that she is not what the show tries to portray her as.
We are told that Alya is more of a serious reporter, or even a detective in the majority of cases.
But... she mostly seems like a fangirl, an amateur gossip reporter, or an influencer.
She is either after Ladybug's identity to post on her blog to get more views, making videos such as rankings, or taking unecessary risks to get some answers.
I know she is a teenager, and there aren't many teenagers in the real world who actually do serious investigative work, but, the problem is that the show tries to portray her in a more serious light.
But, besides helping Marinette with the Miracle Book in season 4, we don't see her doing anything else. We don't see her interrogating akuma victims to find a pattern, or trying to find Hawk Moth's identity with an investigative board... nothing.
If they embraced the more gossipy side, I think that she would be more interesting, but, since they don't, Alya ends up as just an annoying character to me.
Alya's design for me it's good. It's hard for me to imagine her any other way.
10- Ivan Bruel
From this point onwards, is where I start to find the characters interesting or even liking them.
Ivan, as a character, it's pretty interesting. He is sweet, insecure, has no friends, and, still, he seems to care so much about all his friends.
He is aware of his strengh, and, because of that, is afraid of hurting others.
Besides, he is such a cute boyfriend to Mylene, and is always trying to support her.
Astruc also confirmed that he has a hard home life, which, could lead to interesting episodes.
What holds him back is the lack of focus that he is given.
Besides Stoneheart, Horrificator, a bit of Mega Leech, and Penalteam, he doesn't do much, and just stands on the background.
He had the potential of being a fan favorite... but, the plot forgets his existence most of the time.
His design is simple, but, I kind of like it.
9- Mylene Harprele
Mylene, as a character, is interesting as well. I think that it's interesting how much she struggles with her fears, mostly because I struggle with mine as well.
And still, she manages to be an activist and fights for what she believes.
Sadly, she doesn't have much more going with her character.
Besides her sweetness, emphaty and insecurities, the show doesn't explore more about her.
They do have the plot of her interest in acting but... I think that her activism plot is more interesting.
Not that she can't be both, but, since we already have an actress on the main cast (Zoe), I think that they shouldn't overlap.
The web series 'Miraculous Secrets' on YouTube commented on Mylene wants to be a politician someday, and, I think that, if the show focused more on that, Mylene could get way more interesting.
Imagine if, instead of Marinette, Mylene was Class President? She would be forced to face her fears, doubts and Chloe to do so. It could be a great arc for her.
But, no, she only gets one or two uncreative episodes that try to teach about environmental awareness but fail badly.
And, although the fact that her mother left was only added to tarnish Chloe's image even more, they could have used it to explain where her phobias came from, and have an episode where she faces her traumas.
But no. The show just treats her as the "hippie girl" of the class.
As for her design, I don't have any complaints. I heard people talk about how her hair is cultural appropriation, but, since I am a white boy, I have no idea if it is or not.
If any black person would like to comment on the matter, I would gladly hear it.
8- Rose Lavillant
Rose, in general, is an interesting character.
Although she is very sweet and innocent, she is also very strong and dedicated.
And, even is she doesn't have many episodes where she has a prominent role, her minutes on the spotlight are very well utilized.
Either be her usual comments on the Love Square, her trying to cheer her friends up, and "Guilltrip" as a whole.
But, there is one BIG problem with her character... the "Toxic Positivity" she is always trying to force onto the other characters and the viewers.
As someone who grew up with Spongebob, and still uses toxic positivity nowadays as a copying mechanism... kids shouldn't be taught that. It isn't healthy.
And the show doesn't acknowledge that at any moment.
As for the design, I think it fits Rose perfectly. It matches how joyful and bubbly she is.
7- Luka Couffaine
Luka is a pretty chill guy. He usually is the group's therapist due to usually being the one with most experience and thoughtful.
Growing up without a father, and with Anarka being chaotic, he had to learn to be responsible and help himself and Juleka.
He is great at music and uses it to express himself and understand the world around him...
He is also very romantic, and know how to flirt.
He seems like the perfect Love Interest... which ends up making him a bit of an uninteresting character.
I understand why the fandom loves him, because, well, he is "perfect". But, that doesn't leave much room for him to grow.
We rarely saw Luka's inner conflicts or his struggles through the seasons.
Viperion, from his debut, is already great with his miraculous, and he never fails.
The times his powers fail is due to someone else's actions.
Season 5 brought an interesting arc for him. He found out about Ladybug and Chat Noir's identities, and, therefore, can't get akumatized. Because, if he does, Monarch wins.
But, after Migration, he is sent to Brazil and only returns at the season finale...
As for his design... I mean, it's okay. It kind of matches the character... BUT, I would like to comment on something.
During the big season 1 and 2 hiatus, where the fandom survived with the fan comics and the crumbs of information... some people created designs for Luka.
I don't know the artist because I only saw the comic on youtube, but, there was a design of him which he had a more circular face shape like Juleka, red highlights instead of cyan, and a more timid, but still playful behavior that was PERFECT!
Although Canon Luka is sufficient at his job... this fan comic Luka was so cool!
It's a shame I never found the artist...
All in all, I like Luka, but, he could have been more interesting.
6- Nathaniel Kurtzberg
Although I don't like Nathaniel as much as the fandom does, I do think he is interesting.
He is an art kid who enjoys fancomics and fanfiction. Pretty relatable in my opinion.
My main problem with Nathaniel is that the crew sometimes exagerrate with his sass.
Instead of being charismatically sassy (like Pearl on SU, for example), he feels more whiny from time to time.
Like, sometimes it can be a pain to see him in scream complaining or throwing a tantrum.
Still, he is not the worst character on the show.
As for his design... I don't like red on him. Like, we already have so many characters on red, like Marinette after she transforms, Marc, Kagami, Kim...
It's just a bit too much. After finding out he is actually a brunette, i was fully convinced they should have chosen another color for him.
Especially cause, although I love Caprikid's design, and it fits Nathaniel perfectly... the red doesn't look good.
Imagine him being Brunette with really dark hair as a civillian, and his turning black with white streaks after he transforms?
All in all, even if Nathaniel can be enjoyable in canon, he can also be a pain in the ass (and his behavior in "Reverser" was unacceptable).
5- Juleka Couffaine
Juleka is a character that I really like... mostly because of the Brazillian Dub.
In most countries, she is a character that jsut mumbles, and, most of the times I see the official accounts commenting on what she is trying to say... it's usually creepy. Like how people suggested that she once said that "Marinette should kidnap Kagami".
However, instead of just mumbling, Juleka actually speaks in Brazillian. Most of her lines are probably not what Astruc in mind, but, it makes her more interesting.
Brazillian!Juleka is, a lot of the times, a reluctant voice of reason. Like, in one episode, she suggested that Marinette should SPEAK with Kagami about her feelings for Adrien. Instead of any crazy plan.
Besides, I think that Juleka's arc is pretty interesting. She had to learn how to express herself, and stop people from stepping on her.
Although Crocoduel ended up being more about Lukanette's break up than Juleka, it shows us new sides of the character.
It shows how Juleka feels unfavored in comparison to Luka (specially by Jagged), how she doesn't want to disappoint her friends... and how she just want her parents to make peace and stop fighting.
It's a shame that the miraculous magically solved her self-stem, though, instead of being something more procedual.
Also, I hate how the tiger's power was basically the same as the cat, when the entire fandom wanted invisibility.
Still, Juleka had an arc on the show... which is more than I can say about the rest of the cast.
And, the design combines perfectly with her.
4- Max Kante
Max is miraculous best boy, and, no, you won't change my mind.
Max is pretty much the steryotype of the geeky nerd. He is great at math and objectivity, he is great at science, and can be a bit socially awkard from time to time.
Although he doesn't have an overarching story across the series, his hero choice was the one who made most sense in context. Unlike the other heroes who were mostly chosen due to being friends with Ladybug or Chat Noir and being related to the akuma, Max actually helped the heroes on the episode.
His relationship with his mother is also very cute, especially considering how badly Parent and children relationships are written in the show. It reminds me a bit about mine with my mother (although my relationship with my mother can be a bit more complex due to some reasons XD).
My biggest disappointment towards him, however, is that he was given the horse, and not the, I don't know, the RABBIT!
Like, out of all kids in class, he is the one who would probably understand about time travel. Imagine if he was the one safe watching the timeline?
I like to imagine Rabbit!Max as a Professor Paradox from Ben 10, of sorts, who appears only when necessary and knows what to do to keep the events on the rails.
It makes more sense for him to have this role than Alix. At least, in my opinion.
Besides, imagine episodes focused on Max learning how to deal with time annomalies inside of Burrow. Like a Rabbit!Max spin-off! Let me dream, guys, please.
As for his design, it is adorable. I love the suspenders.
I do have my complaints about his character, like, the circumstances for his two akumatizations are pretty... meh and two basic, and his friendship with Kim is too underutilized and explored by the show.
3- Alix Kudbel
Alix is such a fun character to watch. She is competitive, and has a bit of a short fuse, but, at the same time, she is also the one who tends to be the most reasonable on her friends' group.
She is sassy, but on the right measure, and has her moments of vulnerability. And, even if her relationship with her father isn't frequently shown, I think it's interesting that, even is she tends to be a bit rebellious... he supports her and trusts her.
My main problem with her is the choice of her miraculous...
Alix has always been a character that is straight to the point. She is brave, direct and confrontational... and they gave her a miraculous that forces her to be on the sidelines...
In my opinion, she should have been given either the Snake, the Tiger, the Ox, the Bee or the dog.
Due to her position as Bunnix, she doesn't appear as much as she should.
(Although, like with Max, maybe some episodes focused on her adventures inside of burrow could also solve this issue).
Her design is also very cool. It's pretty rebellious and sporty. Although, I don't like the shade of pink in her hair... like, it just doesn't clash well.
I also would like to thank my friend @natedogx15 , by making Alix a main character in his rewrite, he showed me how good Alix could actually be.
2- Zoe Lee
Okay, this character grew a lot in me as I rewatched season 4 and 5 (also the fact that the other characters got worse and worse in my eyes).
Although Zoe is usually seen as just Chloe's half-sister who became the next Queen Bee, she is much more than that.
She is a girl from an abusive family, who felt powerless on her own house, and lost herself in an attempt to fit in a world where she thought she had to belong...
Only to find out that she could be herself, because she would eventually find a place where people would like her for who she is.
I am making a bunch of analysis on Zoe's character, but, to sum it up, she isn't a bad character. It's just that the show hates her.
I would also recommend @nerdy-chocomallow analysis on her. It will surely help you guys have a new vision on her.
1- Sabrina Raincomprix
I am aware that this opinion is very unpopular among the fandom, and I kind of understand it.
She was Chloe's servant from seasons 1 to 4, and, even if she was treated badly... she still helped Chloe into torturing the rest of the class without visible remorse, only to suddenly few guilt in Season 5 and turn her back on Chloe and Lila...
But, just like the majority of Sabrina fans, I like Sabrina for 1, how much i relate to her, and 2, for all the headcanons that I created with her unused potential.
The old webseries commented on how, with the exception of Adrien, Sabrina has the best grades of the class.
You might ask yourself "What about Max?". I like to imagine that, although he is a prodigy at math and science... he isn't as good with subjective subjects. Like poetry.
As for Sabrina, I headcanon her as for being a jack of all trades. She isn't a master at science or Math like Max, but passionate and dedicated enough to get the top grades.
I also like to imagine Sabrina writes poems. She can't vent her feelings with words, so she does it via poems.
Also, as Penalteam shows, she loves soccer. I imagine she is a fan of sports in general, and uses them as a way to relieve stress.
Why she is so dedicated in general? Maybe it's a way to try to get her busy father's attention. Maybe it's so that she can fill the voide she feels due to her loneliness.
Sadly speaking, that's what those headcanons are. Headcanons.
If you guys want more Sabrina headcanons like this, i recommend @sabrina-central to get more info.
It's a shame that canon Sabrina didn't get more explored. Although I never had a toxic friendship on this level, I know the feeling of feeling alone, and that you will never find friends outside your current group. I know how it is to have a lot to say, but unable of externalizing it.
As for her design... I just think that the shorts are ugly. Like, the shade of cyan they chose doesn't fit the character at all.
Anyway, that was my ranking. If you disagree with me... I understand. Miraculous as whole doesn't have good writting, especially when it comes to the characters.
And I understand people excusing or defending a character because they can relate to them.
I just think it's important for us to be critical so we can learn from the mistakes the characters make.
#Youtube#miraculous#miraculous ladybug#marinette salt#adrien salt#thomas astruc salt#chloe salt#lila salt#felix salt
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I feel like you’ve kinda changed a lot recently tbh.
Like I don’t mean any harm. I just mean you went from not being okay with things like Bakudeku, selfcest and other extreme kinks, etc, but now you’re all like, yeah that’s all fine.
Like, what changed your mind on all that? (Genuinely asking)
Also, follow up, what things in fiction do make you feel uneasy?
((Cause I recall you mentioning things like enjoying drawing gore or listening to songs about cannibalism))
This is a bit of a weird ask but since you’re asking genuinely and nicely I’ll expound
Short answer: I got older
Long answer: I grew up, I met a lot of people and realized that there’s a lot of things irl that don’t really… matter that much in fiction? Or matter less? Or they’re really not as bad or world ending as I once thought they were when I was a teenager. When your world gets bigger than the walls of your high school, the things you worried about in fictional worlds become less significant.
for starters let me say that I was never not okay with selfcest I just didn’t really say anything about it until it was brought up, like I really don’t see how it’s a problem. It’s just the age old question of “would you fuck your clone.” and I was a bit of a late bloomer sexuality wise but I’ve always been a bit less vanilla when it comes to kinks- I just keep most if not all of my discussions and art of it in private conversations or under lock and key on priv. I value my privacy and I only want adults to see it.
What changed my view on doing different stuff in fiction was the revelation that I can explore darker topics and complex relationships without it being a moral failing or me endorsing or condoning it and I don’t have to just stick to making fluff. I don’t have to keep my content “”unproblematic”” because it’ll make me problematic somehow, that’s just not how it works. Like I can write about bad stuff in fiction and write stuff as horror and abuse or just explore relationships and how they’d be good or bad and examine tragedy from a well rounded lens. It was like Rock Lee taking off his leg weights for me. I can draw anything .
What makes me uneasy in fiction is when dark topics are romanticized or sexualized. when they’re presented as something “hot” or desirable, or it’s made not with the intention of telling a story or being significant- like for example there’s a difference between someone writing a fic about Hunter being a victim of csa and the horror of that vs someone writing a smutty fic of Hunter x Belos for the purpose of whacking off. There’s a difference between gore and violence on a character for the sake of torture and pain vs angst for a reason. Angst that makes sense. Bad things happen in real life and are okay to be portrayed in fiction, but sometimes I can tell when something is meant to be masturbatory. That’s what makes me uncomfortable!
Also I had a fascination with gore ever since I was a little kid and found warrior cats amvs and I drew a lot of battle scenes with red pen but I think I got all of that out of my system in childhood, I don’t draw gore anymore for the sake of gore LOL like I can’t even play mouthwashing bc I know it’ll make me nauseous
I hope this helps ??
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THE QUESTION
a/n: okay so i'm kinda sorta out of my reblog-only purgatory and i finally have some motivation to post on here again!! requests are now being accepted again and i'll try to get the motivation to write them!! i've missed u lot :)
Word Count: ~700
Warnings/notes: not proofread, hotch being happy?
<3: aaron hotchner x reader
“Are you breaking up with me?”
You had to admit, you hadn’t wanted the question to arise so quickly and upfront, but there it was, floating in front of the two of you.
It was a rather romantic location to be broken up with; a picnic in the park on a nice spring afternoon. But Aaron was nice and he wouldn’t break up with you over the phone, or at home where you would have to leave and then come back for your things awkwardly. Or worse: be overheard by Jack.
It took Aaron a few seconds to comprehend what you said, “W-What?”
Ah. He hadn't expected to be caught out so early. Well, you were nothing if not merciful - Aaron did not have to let you down slowly if you did it for him. You'd felt as though he'd been leading up to it for a while now.
He had gone out a few times and been cagey about where he was going, he was being secretive, jumping when you entered rooms and seemingly being very interested in how you were interacting with the other people in his life.
It's so nice how you are with Jack.
It was your fault, really. You inserted yourself into his life, jumped head-first and hoped that that was what Aaron had wanted, needed. It wasn't. You weren't.
You braced yourself.
“Usually, when the guy starts to act strange, the girl suspects cheating, but I know you wouldn’t cheat - or at least I hope I know that you wouldn’t cheat - so the only thing left is that you’re breaking up with me.”
“I’m not breaking up with you, honey.”
“You’re not breaking up with me?”
“No.”
“Oh.”
Suddenly the idea of you stewing over your fictional breakup for even a few minutes was mortifyingly embarrassing. You wished you hadn't said anything at all, kept Aaron in the dark about your insecurity.
You looked up at the trees above you, trying to catch your breath.
“Though I should have guessed that you would have noticed something was going on, you’re a better profiler than I am,” He mumbled as he fished for something in his pocket.
“Yeah, that’s why you’re the unit chief.” You rolled your eyes, giddy in your moment of relief that the best thing that had ever happened to you wasn’t changing. You didn’t even notice that he’d stopped looking for something until he went silent and you were forced to check on him.
That’s when you saw the box.
It wasn’t open yet, and you refused to overreact again before you were sure it wasn’t a promise ring, a necklace, or something else. But when Aaron opened the box to reveal the most engagement ring-looking engagement ring - a three-stone silver ring that was certainly too expensive to be a promise ring - you allowed yourself a small gasp.
“Aaron-”
“I love you,” You didn’t mind the interruption when it came like that, “Jack loves you, you’re our family. I know that I’ve been acting strange recently, and that’s because I’ve been trying to keep this a secret when I’m so-” He paused to take in a breath, a grin spreading across his lips. “-So excited to put this ring on your finger. I almost just asked you to marry me last night.”
The confirmation that he was, in fact, asking you to marry him made tears form in your eyes, your heart overflowing with love but deeper. You couldn’t believe you’d thought he was breaking up with you.
Aaron didn’t bother getting onto one knee - he’d done that before, and this time was different. He took a breath in, released it heavily, and then, with sparkling eyes:
“Will you marry me?”
“Yes. Yes!” You could barely get out the word before Aaron had closed the box and practically launched himself forward, catching your face in his hands and kissing you passionately.
Later, you would laugh with your friends about the question you'd asked, the question that had been plaguing your mind for days, and how it contrasted so wildly with the question that Aaron had asked, the question he'd been thinking about for months.
#criminal minds fic#criminal minds imagine#aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner x reader#aaronhotchfic#hotch x reader
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yingdu episode 5 spoilers
ohhh my god this is everything I want from cheng xiaoshi. yes. perfect. sorry, but I'm a cheng xiaoshi whump liker and link click always brings out the best of them in episode 5 of each season.
there's just something cathartic about how when cheng xiaoshi becomes an emotional mess, it's also when he's most disconnected with the people he knows (physically, as he's diving in a photo and his only link to his home timeframe is a disembodied lu guang in his head) but it's also when he's most connected with strangers (when their own personal trauma lines up with his). to me, it's a showcase of empathy and a strange manifestation of his own agency. something about how the disconnect gives him the space to blow up, and the connection heightens it and grants him permission, almost, to express his anger more freely for his own sake and for another person's behalf.
like. listen, okay, I'm gonna ramble now because cheng xiaoshi is my favorite character in this entire show, but listen. sometimes some fans will conflate adjectives to his character that are usually associated with his character archetype, but they aren't necessarily true about him as a character. and I don't mean it in a, "he's not like that because he grows out of those traits" kind of way. I mean it in a, "he was never like that" kind of way.
one of those adjectives, for me, is when people call him immature. he isn't! to me! imo! he's got big emotions, yes, but I personally don't think the presence of big emotions indicates anything about maturity. because you know what? as long as his primary trauma (feelings of abandonment) isn't touched, he is very good at handling interpersonal conflicts, and that's what's interesting to me.
qiao ling hides relevant information from him? he removes himself from the situation to give himself space and sort out his feelings. he tells her he's fine and that he'll be back.
post-earthquake arc? I'll just copy paste what I already said in a previous ask:
what initially got me was when I was first watching S1, I thought the earthquake arc would have devastating effects on [shiguang's] relationship. listen, I didn’t know what I was getting into with link click, but I thought that was expected. it’s ripe for drama! but how do they handle the fight? they put their side business on hold but they still keep being roommates. they still do their day job. they still talk. they’re still upset but they give each other space but not to the point where they can’t stand existing in each other’s spaces. that’s when I realized that oh, they really trust each other. they have a very solid foundation for their relationship that not even the earthquake arc can break. they’re pretty level-headed about this, actually, all things considered? all the doomed yaoi stuff came later, but that’s just the cherry on top. it’s the way they handled conflict and disappointment in S1 that got me.
okay, protect-namine, why go through that whole tangent? BECAUSE! circling back to yingdu episode 5, we finally, finally get to see cheng xiaoshi let out some of his anger. and it's precisely because his primary trauma point was on the table. he can forgive a friend lying, and he can forgive being told not to change the past. because at the end of the day, qiao ling and lu guang stayed. they never left him.
but he cannot handle abandonment. he cannot understand why people leave. he cannot understand why he's been clinging on to false hope this entire time. and more importantly, he cannot understand how someone can be such a hypocrite about it. "a man who'd rather be kind to strangers than face his own son" like fuck man. cheng weimin you fucked up so bad.
it's the disconnect/connect thing again too. thematically, it makes sense. when does cheng xiaoshi blow up? when he's alone, far away from the people that ground him. alone, the feeling he hates the most. he's not even in his own body. he blows up when he's inhabiting a stranger's. he doesn't even get to be angry as cheng xiaoshi.
how fucked up is that. man. I love him so much.
also I'm going crazyyyy over the family themes going on in link click. much to say about the show itself across all seasons (the twins, qiao ling and cheng xiaoshi, even the liu siblings), but for this episode... god. okay this is slight speculation territory now and I'll try to keep this very short, because this is only tangential to the post. but. imagine xia fei getting the good parent figure in cheng weimin that cheng xiaoshi never had. and he doesn't know!! he's bitter inside about his dad and he's having hotpot with xia fei and he doesn't know he was in that school!! fuck that's so good. that's so juicy.
okay, sorry, I have a lot of feelings about cheng xiaoshi. he's my link click blorbo of all time, and I love when he experiences The Horrors™ because it's also when other sides of him gets to shine.
on a brighter note:
VEIN AND CHENG XIAOSHI MEETING AGAIN!!! their greeting was so cute. also omg does xia fei know? that his boss is maybe possibly a cannibal? actually, wait, I don't think I'd be surprised if he does know.
ah and finally. finally:
I've been having many thoughts on how yingdu approaches "friendships" and their transactional nature (mostly with regards to liu xiao) but I mostly thought they're headcanon stuff. but now. I'm so so happy that episode 5 is bringing out more of the quid pro quo theme. liu xiao with the gift giving. wang qing's "friends" (bullies) demanding her to cheat on the exam for them. and now, vein and cheng xiaoshi having a friendly greeting but also exchanging favors. so good. so good. it goes along with how there's so much handshakes and handholding this season (not just with lu guang and cheng xiaoshi, but with cheng xiaoshi and the the antagonist trio too, who have all met him by "helping" him in some way). something something trust and favors. probably something that deserves its own post though, but I wanted to point this out because I am soooo here for that. it's goes hand in hand (ha!) with the whole fraud/lies vs innocence/honesty theme this season, and deals/contracts being an equalizer to the two. very good. very tasty.
edit: ooh they also point to this in the YE6 trailer too. nice, nice. if you knew someone's true colors, would you still be their friend?
man, I love episode 5. it just hits all the stuff I personally wanted to see. the only flaw is that we still haven't seen the older version of wang qing, but yeah I kinda expected that they'll hide her until episode 6. they're giving her the liu xiao treatment from season 2. sigh. really wish she'd keep showing up in S3, we need more female characters in this show 🙏
#mine musings#liveblogging link click#link click#link click spoilers#the fic writer in me is so pleased. this is validating so much of the direction i want my fic to go#i'm sorry if this reads as very rambly. this post could probably be shorter but i don't wanna fix this up to make it read better#my emotions for cxs are too much to be organized in a logical manner#no meta-formatted essay like my post with qiao ling. this is just me blorbofying him#literally half stream of consciousness writing. cxs you are so loved. i love u. i hope you get cuddles but i love when you face The Horrors#because i know you can handle it. and also you needed to blow up like YESTERDAY so honestly this is therapy for you now#actually you know what. i'll probably reference this in the future for fic purposes so yeah i'll tag it#link click meta#actually i'll add one more thing re: maturity but i'll put it here in the tags#something i love about cxs. is that no matter the trauma he goes through. he is still kind#like this could've been anyone's villain origin story. but cxs works hard to be kind in spite of his experiences#like back again with conflating big emotions with immaturity. but choosing to be kind despite it all? it takes a lot of heart to do that
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Thanks, @future-ghoost and @eldritchelfwriter for the taggingtons. I will be cheeky and piggy back tag @strugglingcomet2, @cylinderarts, @fogno, and @shadowfalllen 😂 Here are some excerpts from my WIPs:
Where There Is No Darkness
”Shadowheart, I know you know who I am, and I would really want to talk to you,” Mavis says. Her brow, previously furrowed in anger, softens slightly, her expression filling with an unidentifiable anxiety.
Shadowheart cannot stand to look at Mavis anymore. Her entire being is filled by what she has spent her entire life denying. The closeness of Mavis, the reality of her there, in front of Shadowheart, wishing to speak to her… It all feels like too much, like she might combust, implode, or simply cease to exist from the sheer volume of everything at once. Her very fabric of being sings, yearns to wrap her arms around this woman, just like the old days. To greet her after years of no her.
But this would be a folly. Shadowheart turns back to her books again. ”What do you want to talk about, Mavis?” she asks. Mavis’ name falls off her tongue with difficulty. It is as if her muscles have forgotten how to form the word in her mouth. Years of not uttering it have made it almost foreign.
”Well, I’d like to know how you are for starters,” says Mavis, a hint of sarcasm colouring her tone.
Shadowheart puts a pile of books on a shelf, carefully ensuring the correct alphabetical order. ”I’m fine,” she huffs. ”Although, I’d be even better if left alone.”
Mavis is silent for a moment. Shadowheart can feel her hesitation, the tension between them. The urge to reach towards her and remind her fingers of the feeling of Mavis’ skin. No.
”You really don’t want to talk?” Mavis’ voice is small, hurt radiating off each word like the cool, clear light of the moon. But Shadowheart must not succumb to the ache Mavis’ pain evokes in her heart.
”Trust me,” she mutters. ”There’s nothing neither you nor I could say that would change anything.”
There is another pause. Finally, Mavis says: ”Fine. As you wish.” Shadowheart hears Mavis’ footsteps retreat, then stop a few feet away. ”You know,” Mavis remarks. ”I will still be here. I must. I hope you aren’t bothered by that.” More footsteps follow, taking Mavis away. Shadowheart finishes reshelving the books and takes her trolley into the back room. There, in the privacy of the four walls filled with freshly returned books, she lets a single tear roll down her cheek.
Cool Me Down, Grease Me Up
”Having trouble?” Wyll asks. Tav nods sheepishly. ”Yeah… I had some trouble starting it up when I left to come here, but now it just won’t start at all, it seems,” she groans.
”You’ll need a mechanic to look into that,” Wyll remarks. Tav’s heart flutters in her chest. It has been too long since her last visit to Last Break Light. Today, she would get to see Shadowheart again.
”There’s a really good one living just around the corner from here,” Wyll says.
”No, it’s okay,” Tav says almost too quickly. She doesn’t want to go to any old neighbourhood car guy. It’s Last Break Light or no dice.
”Please, I insist,” Wyll says, ignoring Tav’s objections. He is already on the phone.
”Hey, it’s Wyll here. How are you?” Wyll pauses to listen to the response from the other end.
”Here, someone’s car’s broken down in my driveway. Any chance you could take a look?” He listens again. He then grins at Tav, giving her a thumbs-up.
”Excellent! See you in a minute!” he says and ends the call. ”Help is on the way,” he smiles.
Not five minutes go by and a black pickup truck appears around the corner. With tinted windows and larger than average tires, the car looks impressive, almost intimidating.
”Ah, the cavalry has arrived,” Wyll smiles.
The truck reverses so its rear is aligned with Tav’s car. Tav gets out of her car in preparation to greet this neighbourhood mechanic. The truck door opens and the first thing Tav sees is a black Chuck Taylor. As her gaze moves up, she sees a slender, yet muscular leg. The driver’s door shuts, revealing the rest of the mechanic.
”Aren’t you a sight for sore eyes?”
Unnamed fic where corporate queen bee Tav from our world gets transported to Faerûn by accident (the WIPpiest WIP that ever WIPped)
“She was… interesting,” Tav says after a moment of uncomfortable silence.
“Interesting is an understatement,” Lae’zel snorts. “That woman is the dagger you’ll find buried in your back if you aren’t vigilant enough.”
“I sense a story here,” Tav presses, for some reason feeling eager to learn more about this Shadowheart and her dark mysteries.
“She’s the Mother Superior of a cloister full of Shar’s acolytes,” Karlach explains. The explanation only invites a load of questions.
“Karlach, slow down. You’re speaking in riddles again. So, she’s in some kind of a church?” Tav asks, trying her hardest to understand.
Karlach nods. “She’s the leader of a group of Shar worshippers in Baldur’s Gate,” she says.
“And Shar is…?” Tav asks sheepishly. There is so much in this world she has yet to learn. Knowledge, as they say, is power.
“Shar is the goddess of darkness. Her and her followers are committed to shrouding the world in the night,” Wyll explains. “The Nightsinger, they call her.”
“The Nightsinger… Right. So why don’t we like Shadowheart?” Tav asks after some thought.
Lae’zel rolls her eyes impatiently. “Chk! Did you not hear what Wyll just said? She and her goddess are working to bring about an eternal darkness,” she spits.
“So she’s working for an evil goddess,” Tav says. “Gotcha. Why are you friends with her, then?”
“She was also tadpoled, just like the rest of us,” Karlach says. “She was there when we fought the Absolute. I suppose you can’t go through some things without becoming friends.”
“I guess it makes sense…” Tav trails off, turning her head to look at Shadowheart, who is sitting by the long table, slowly twirling a goblet of wine in her hand.
“She has done some awful things, Tav,” Karlach says. “There isn’t much else to say about her, really.”
Hurt people hurt people. Her father’s words swim into Tav’s mind as she keeps watching Shadowheart sip at her wine. Shadowheart suddenly turns her head and catches Tav’s stare. She smiles, raising her goblet. As if guided by an outside force, Tav takes a few steps towards her.
WIP Workday
Thanks so much for the tags @thedissonantverses and @hyperions-light! 😁 I’m tagging anyone who wants to do this, but I’ll shout out @taashyvashedan, @mageofquandrix, @future-ghoost, @swamp-jello, and @neve-gallus-girl-detective.
I’m still puttering along with…so many things in various stages of editing, and actual drafting is still going on in Tevinter Bathhouses Excursion and Multi-Chapter land. So below the cut is some of the first chapter (currently being edited, hasn’t been beta’d beyond a read for flow and to check my terrible Latin by @mvrcar) of the bathhouse fic.
Grinning in a way that felt almost maniacal, Rook straddled the bench Neve had chosen and leaned back until he was propped up only by his elbows. “Say what you will about the corruption, and the slavery, and the blood mages, and the supremacist cult…Tevinter did get bathhouses right.”
She chuckled. “How far did you have to reach for that bright side?” She asked.
His brow furrowed in thought for a moment, before he shrugged. “Not very. Gotta see the little daily good things, too, not just the bad.”
Neve felt a bead of sweat slip down her neck, and her pulse picked-up as she realized Rook’s eyes were following it. He bit his lower lip gently, and suddenly it felt like the heat of the room was in her veins.
She cleared her throat gently, and he startled guiltily. “Is that so?” Neve asked, redirecting him. Well, both of them.
“Yeah, uh…yeah,” Rook said, shaking his head a little as though coming out of a daze. “I mean, it’s not perfect, right? But if we don’t see the good things, the things we do like about the Imperium, we’ll lose hope, eventually. If there’s nothing of value here, what are we trying to save?”
He wasn’t wrong, really, and there were good things in Tevinter. Good people. Halos, Rana, Tarquin, Lorelei, Claudia from the street earlier. Neve knew that. Still, she didn’t understand how he did it. How he kept that optimism.
She’d have pinned it on to his needing to maintain morale, but they were alone. Just two Tevinters born to non-mage families. People who’d seen the dark underbelly the Magisterium tried to pretend didn’t exist. He wasn’t putting on a show for her; he knew her well enough to know she wouldn’t buy it.
This was how he genuinely felt. Neve shook her head a little as fondness for him warmed her chest just as effectively as the room. “You’re just a ray of sunshine, aren’t you?”
He grinned. “I try.”
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(✯) @hiswrlds — my tomorrow's still your today
— ;; Cavorting through encrypted hoops to find the source of the diabolical Doctor Robotnik's strange series of radio broadcasts certainly wasn't an easy task to accomplish, nor was it one of an opaque nature. Stumbling into the tracked location, an autobody shop in disrepair, should have been the end of it. Facing the looming figure of imminent destruction waiting with bated breath for their confrontation, taking him up on his all-too-confident proposition of a fight, and walking away from it victorious as always.
However, a mess of familiarly-hued orange fur and bushy twin tails is what's there to greet instead. Positioned comfortably in a chair towards the northeast corner of the room behind the desk, attention buried into whatever colorful literature he’s reading this week per usual. Chiming above the glass door, the greeting bell indicates the arrival of a second presence, and his ear twitches without making eye contact.
❝Sorry. The good doctor’s currently out to lunch,❞ the spiel coming from the lips of Tails, such a perky, bright-eyed kid, now speaking in a way that’s decidedly practiced and monotonous, feels strange and uncomfortable. ❝Just leave your first name and your phone number on the notepad and he’ll call you back at his earliest convenience.❞
— ;; Threading fingers through tufts of unruly bangs, growling an irritated sigh, he stands up, half-slouched over to reach for a stray pen—
— ;; —And then he looks up.
#( COGS AND GEARS; IC. )#( SAILING TO NOWHERE; MAIN VERSE. )#hiswrlds#i hope this is okay!!!!! let me know if there's anything at all you need changed or edited!!#tails hasn't seen any version of sonic in... a hot minute... dude avoids them like crazy so he's a lil shook (it's the shake)#do we thank robotnik for being physically incapable of shutting the fuck up for 5 minutes or beat his ass for having the audacity#considering that if he were here he would sell tails to sonic for half a cornchip ig it was only a matter of time anyway#bro really said “pull up” and when sonic did he ran for it
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so is jannik your favorite player? i was under the impression it was matteo. sorry just curious 😅
hi friend! oh yeah that's a totally fair assumption fjfvjv yeah no it's jannik but matteo is a close second! (for wta it's aryna with ons and jasmine as close seconds. but jannik is like my #1 favorite player in general)
#maybe this is bc i have said more than once before that i'd root/want for matteo to win in a final against jan#and i do stand by that! like jannik is jannik to me i always want him to win BUT bc of how matteo's career went compared to jannik's (+ the#fact matteo is older) i'd take him winning a tournament over jannik pretty much any time#like. in a match that's early rounds i'm... a little more conflicted mostly bc as much as i love and have faith i matteo atm jannik is#just objectively more likely to go far in any tournament. so matteo beating him and then not winning the whole thing would kind of suck#bc i'd think “jannik could've won it all”. you know what i mean?#but like i still hold genuine hope in me that matteo could do it. always. so i WOULD be happy if he beat jannik#(or like. i'd be happy he won. not happy he beat jannik :/)#it's just if he did and then lost to someone else i'd want to cry for a week LMAO 😭#but anyway in a FINAL? no contest i would rather matteo wins it. at the moment at least#maybe that could change in the next years idk if like matteo gets really good again and wins like at least one slam lmao i'd be okay#with jannik beating him in a final again. OR if jannik won a shitton of slams and went for like a record???? but#let's not get ahead of ourselves here AND LET'S NOT JINX ANYTHING.#i'm talking too much but just to wrap it up: back in 2021 for example i'd have chosen jannik to win over matteo. definitely#bc their careers were on not exactly opposite trajectories as they are now but in a sense their 'roles' were switched#matteo was italy's number one and it was clear he was meant to win big things- so i thought well he's going to win a slam soon. i'd have#rooted for jannik to win as a sort of underdog in that scenario! now with matteo's career having taken a different direction due to injurie#he is not the favorite to win big tournaments anymore while jan most definitely is! so. matteo winning a trophy would mean more basically#that was way too long sorry gifbkhbm#yeah jan's my number one <3 he's the only one who's made me feel the same way roger did when i was younger and watching tennis :')#asks#anon
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...
#i was supposed to spend the last 2 days prepping and relaxing for the start of this big project tomorrow#but ive spent thr last 2 days frantically coding as fast as i could and focusing v hard to get a lot of bullshit done#and ive fixed things since yesterday. the changes i had to make were too too bad bc the thing that went wrong was so fucking weird#but it should be okay by tomorrow. knock on wood. but this does mean ive done fuck all to prep for tomorrow#so we r winging it bby. ugh. just gotta fucking pray that everything goes ok. pls let nothing b broken and let everything seal properly 🙏#i was also supposed to meet with my boss today. probably for her to make sure i dont fuck up this project but apparently their safety hood#was having an emergency... whatever that means. so im sure shes having a week as well. and im free to fuck everything up for everyone#ugh. im so. theres a certain point in burning out where youre not really in pain anymore. you dont really feel anything all your joy and#hope dissolves away and u just exist to be useful. and i feel like its easier to maintain that than trying to b happy#i do not advise that bc its a fucking miserable. wasteful way to live but i dont really have time to try for anything better#god. i really hope my measurements friday dont take a full 8hrs. i dont know if i can handle that. literally i would have stay intensely#focused with my brain being Interrupted every 5min so i can manually record data points. its gonna b agony#so that fun. but maybe it wont. maybe itll be great and fun and ill have a wonderful time. seems unlikely but ya never kno#lets not think abt the fact that having to rush all this is preventing me from being able to do all thr other bullshit i need to get done#to prepare for the future. future? what future? hard to imagine from the bottom of this pit im digging myself#sigh. in a few months i can leave this place and never come back. soon but not soon enough#lol i was literally crying listening to cold play earlier bc idk thats the type of music my parents would put on at parties in summertime#so it evokes a v specific mood. which is i guess me hiding away from ppl at parties haha#back when i didnt have to worry abt things so much and i could just listen to the frogs chirping and watch the fireflies#oh god. now my boss is asking if i reached out for help tomorrow. no. lady i would rather drink bleach than have to direct an undergrad#tomorrow. its 10pm im fucking tired. just let me be sad. did i reach our for help? no my brain is on fire#tomorrow is gonna b a long day ugh#unrelated
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should she be focusing on her studies? most certainly! her ambitions to become a sorceress one day have not faltered and have only grown in the face of madame morible's rejection but all the same, these days her mind is far removed from studies and, thankfully, she has been distracted from feuding with her roommate and the appearance of one prince and the upcoming party. it is all she can think about, a wide smile on her lips as she kicks her feet excitedly under the table, leaning to the girl sitting besides her in class.
" what are you wearing to the ozdust? " she whispers with a wide grin to her table partner, a little laugh on galinda's lips as she toys with a lock of her golden hair, tapping her feather quill on her notebook. " oh! and what are you going to do with your hair?!" obviously this is a far more important discussion than whatever they are supposed to be doing in class- whatever else can obviously wait!
@ofmcck liked for a wicked starter !
#oh val... i am so sorry...#also hi i have missed writing with you lots hope you are doing well friend! and hope this is okay!#if you would like something else / me to change anything OR would like one from elphie as well let me know!!!#( VALERIE. | OFMCCK. )#( GALINDA. | INTERACTIONS. )
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Have you ever been assumed to be romantically attracted to someone and even just the thought of that makes you want to throw up . Anybody
#had someone's husband in my dms going on about how i want this bitch romantically and frankly if i hadn't been so busy crying i would've#actually thrown up . absolutely disgusting idea . vile even . horrid concept#anyway tldr im down a best friend because he didn't tell me anything i was doing was wrong after telling me that everything was okay and#then sent his husband after me to call me a creep that was obsessed with him that also apparently tried to make out w him#the same trip that my best friend of five years told me he hated having me in his hometown to see him graduate.#this was after i found out my cat had been murdered and mutilated and thrown in my granma's garden . that day happened to be my birthday#because my ma was kind enough to drive me and my lil brother down there to go see him graduate bc he was also supposed to move in w us the#month after . and he told me right after i got home that he 'didn't think it would be good for our relationship' and apparently#just didn't know how to tell me until a month before it was supposed to happen . bonkers times over here#anyway i didn't want to make out with him . he cried after i wouldn't have sex w him just last december . which i specifically got high as#shit to avoid . and i dont even have like. actual examples of what i was doing wrong to go off of so now i just get to live in mystery#forever ig. like shocker that the person that's been my best friend for five years would tell his husband to say that to me and not say that#shit to me himself . this is a wild to me . i feel like im going insane . can anybody even hear me what's going on#you know its bad when your mama gets so sick of you crying over a friend that she hugs you for the first time in years#also i cant sleep my head hurts . crying is evil . devils liquid . might watch rpdr or something . still nauseous over the idea of being#into him romantically btw . like still nauseous over that . like what a fucking insult to our entire friendship#does saying that we may as well have been made of the same atoms mean like . nothing . does nothing ive said to or about him not mean anythi#ng if its not romantic in nature . what did i do that wasnt enough for him. i fucking told him he outgrew me and that was fine i just#wanted to know if we were still friends or not and he said we were and i believed him. if he told me the sky was green i would make it so#ripping my hair out . am i being dramatic . am i the only person that wasn't expecting this . am i the only one that didn't know#when i had to tell people who knew about the moving plans that he changed his mind the first fucking thing i was told was “i thought it migh#t happen.“ WELL I FUCKINH DIDN'T . AND NOBODY TOLD ME#this is like . the second most humiliating moment of my life . aside from movinggate because at least nobody irl has to know about this#anyway . this boy could've taken my blood and i'd sit there and smile while he did it because he was my best friend .#i was so glad we got to grow up together. i miss him already. im taking my little brother to school my myself for the first time and all im#gonna wanna do is tell him about it . im tired . i want to sleep . im still so nauseous . did none of it mean anything just because ive#never and will never like him romantically. does that make everything less worthy somehow#i hope he never talks to me again. i dont think i could handle this again. he let is fucking husband say that shit to me. not him.#puppmeo misery
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╰ ☾ ₊ ⸻ @lvscinvs ⧽ uttered ❛ "I'll be right there when you wake up."
𝐒𝐋𝐄𝐄𝐏 𝐈𝐒 𝐁𝐔𝐓 a fair-weather friend. She deigns only to visit Helaena in fleeting fits that grant little relief. She slips away like so many grains of sand in an hourglass, and no easier for Helaena to catch than the shifting tide. How many nights has it been that she has woken with a scream perched in her throat? The dreadful blackbird of despair that sits heavy on her chest will not leave its roost!
Helaena aches with a hunger far greater than that of food or thirst for drink. Already she has beseeched The Mother her famed mercy. The Maiden, her gentle touch. Neither have seen fit to turn an ear her way. The Seven are deaf as ever, no matter how fervently she prays.
"You cannot pledge that," she tells her dear brother, and she does not mean this morning or the one after. The perfume of death lingering around their family clogs her nostrils so heavily that she can barely breathe around it, thick as the incense smoke that lingers in the holy places of the Sept. She has seen Aemond gone, swallowed by a great body of water. Every time she closes her eyes she sees the blade sawing through her little babe's neck like so much meat. Aegon, burned and crying. These have all yet to pass, but her dreams are more constant a companion than any man she has ever known.
And always, she is dreaming. So when does she wake, when the veil between is so thin? Has she ever woken, truly? Some days, it grows rather difficult to tell when she is awake or still entangled in the cold arms of the shades that haunt her so. She has never known a warmer embrace. "But it is good of you to say."
#lvscinvs#I hope this is okay! let me know if you want anything changed#this happens at a random time Before Events but like#really wherever you would like it
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You gonna do anything or make any statement about the rampant transmisogyny on this hellsite, especially in cases like predstrogen recently? Or yall gonna stay silent and keep letting/making us get pushed off of it.
I have a number of asks about this, so this is to address all of them, I won't do each individually.
We generally do not comment on individual cases, but because there seems to be mass misinformation around this, I will make an exception and comment on predstrogen.
First, Tumblr has a number of LGBT+ including trans people on staff, and they see things from the inside fully, and they're not protesting this case.
Why do we wrongly have a transphobe reputation? We did have an external contract moderator last year that was making transphobic moderation (and also selling moderation, criminally). As soon as we were aware that person was fired, and we later terminated the entire relationship with that contracting firm and have brought almost everything in-house (at great cost). I have previously commented on this publicly, several times.
I am not aware of any Automattician (people who work at Automattic and Tumblr) who has made any transphobic moderation actions. If it's reported it is investigated immediately, if anything were found that person would be terminated for cause immediately.
Predstrogen's account was suspended for:
Repeated mis-tagging of adult content against Tumblr's community guidelines. This has nothing to do with clothed transition photos, she had 20+ other blogs and multiple accounts with names so explicit I can't post them here without a mature tag.
Multiple cases of harassment of other Tumblr users, not just me.
Multiple threats of violence, not just the one I share below.
These represent a breach of our Terms of Service, and we've exercised our right to refuse service.
Threats of violence are never okay. Threats of violence are not protected speech. We will work with police and FBI where appropriate, though to be clear prestrogen's case hasn't warranted that so far. I'm referring to what we may potentially do for other threats. I just got a death threat yesterday from someone mad about predstrogen, and that account was immediately terminated.
So regardless of whether you still think Tumblr staff is somehow a bunch of transphobes, know that threats of violence or death are still not acceptable and will result in immediate and serious action. Know that when you rile people up, they can do dumb things with possibly permanent consequences.
(2 hours later update: I have changed instances of the pronoun "they" or "their" to "the account" because I am unaware of pronoun preference in this instance and don't want to misgender anyone. Thank you for the people who reported this as an issue. Update 2: "She" is apparently better, the post now says that. Sorry for the mistake.)
Here's one (of many!) examples of the harassment violations, this one targets me but there are others targeting other users on the site.
The second part seems to indicate she wanted to be suspended, I'm unaware of why, perhaps to create this sort of uproar. I agree the hammers feel silly, but the start, "i hope photomatt dies forever a painful death" is a violation of Tumblr's community guidelines and terms of service.
The car part did hit close to home as I have almost died twice in car accidents.
Update 2: Added this text to the adult content part: This has nothing to do with clothed transition photos, she had 20+ other blogs and multiple accounts with names so explicit I can't post them here without a mature tag.
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@dullweapons ♡ for a starter
ZELDA LIKED TO THINK SHE WAS ADJUSTING WELL TO EVERYTHING. moving to the surface had gone a lot easier than expected, and those in skyloft brave enough to accompany her were adjusting to it all relatively well. she had the comfort of knowing that demise was gone, and that there was going to be peace moving forward ( even if just for her lifetime ).
THE ONLY THING SHE HASN'T FULLY ACCEPTED YET WAS HYLIA. or, to be more exact, hylia's memories. to have an entire lifetime, hundreds of lifetimes, given to you with limited context was harrowing. the reality that she had done this all before, had seen and done some horrific things what seemed to be so long ago haunted the young woman. the smallest bit of thanks was that hylia's memories weren't a constant, only making themselves known when they deemed it necessary for her to know them. of course, knowing there is an entire life time of memories you are unable to access is another form of terrifying, but one battle at a time.
WHICH ALL CULMINATED TO NOW. zelda had wandered away from the rest of the settlement, wanting to scout out more of the area around faron, partially in hopes of finding some new crops to bring back, and partially to just get away from the rest. she was so use to the kikwi's constant noise and movement that the sound of ruffling leaves didn't alarm the goddess reborn until she found herself face to face with another. the blonde stumbled back in shock, an apology dancing along the tip of her tongue until a memory flashed to the fore front.
A SMALL BOY, FIGHTING IN A WAR HE SHOULD HAVE HAD NO PART IN. a child, wanting nothing but love being forced to fight, to do horrific things. zelda could feel her heart dropping as hylia provided her with memory after memory, yet no name to accompany it.
❝ you... she knew... no... no that's not right. i... i knew you...
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