#hope that makes sense... im very tired haha

[phagodyke]

I have a quick question what do mirrored pronouns mean?

it means referring to someone with the same pronouns you'd use for yourself! imagine it like a mirror reflecting your pronouns back at you... thanks for asking :-)

[vero-niche]

whenever i see u my mind buffers for a momenr and replaves ur proflie pic w a capybara and then i remember who u r <3

awwwww 🥹 💞 i see my capybara icon was the most iconic (heh) - it shall return then 🫡

[koifsssh]

okay first things first

a) i am insane

b) i really like clowns

so put these two things together and what do you get?

you get clown rainy of course!!! look at him go!!!

I should probably explain what's going on, so i will! I had made clown rainy... and then sort of made an au centered around that idea, not that i really think of it as any proper au, since it's mostly for oc's and such! with that out of the way i will explain his acts! yippee!

he is a dreamer! a wanderer of the stars, if you will! He does tightrope and trapeze! At least, that's what i think fits him best!

his stage name is the Sleepwalker! very sleepy, very tired, you get the gist! they call him that because he's often mistaken for having his eyes closed on the tightrope, so they think he's "sleepwalking"!

his solo shows are mostly calmer segments, im not sure how to describe it really. usually he has a microphone attached to him, so he may talk to the audience! however, he's usually talking to himself really, but thats what they come for!

Rainy's ramblings are sort of hopeless romantic, but some of the things he says can be comedic as well, it depends really...

his shows are supposed to leave you sighing, if that makes sense! my favorite quote of his is this;

"I hope you don't make fun of me, but i've always wanted to dance amongst the stars... haha, do you think i would be good at it? Oh, if i had a partner with me we could dance on the rings of Saturn, that would so lovely, wouldn't it? ...Oh well, i suppose it's alright, i don't mind dancing alone, the stars are always a witness..."

on another note, he's a duo with Maverick! (because of course he is!)

they are very silly together, a couple of clowns... a clown couple... clowns...

they do various bits together!

though, admittedly, Rainy's favorite bit to do with maverick is to gently smack him in the face, he thinks its hilarious

very silly indeed!

(also! note! yes, i know, rainy's design did quite change a bit, but just know the colored reference is the one i'm going with! as much as i love a good clown, they never cease to make it difficult to draw...)

i should probably note that the au so far has mostly been about them specifically...

hehe, it was probably obvious though!

[zyonsay]

Hey I wanted to ask if you could write a Yuki Tsunoda X male reader smut? :)

Maybe where the reader helps Yuki steam off after a bad race or something Yknow? I'm sorry I'm not that creative with ideas 😭

I hope you can make sense of it haha And if you don't want to write for him that's okay as well<3 (or if I didn't saw his name in the list for the people you don't write for, I apologise)

Pearl Necklace YT22

fem aligned people may read but not f3tishize my work!!

Summary: Maybe he needs to blow off some steam

Reader: Male

Warnings: NSFW, Choking, Biting, Blood (Everything is consensual)

Now playing: 'Take me to Church' by Hozier

AN: Hello guys! This took longer than expected haha, but im kinda happy with the outcome. idk its 1 in the morning so i might be wrong lol. But anyways, first Yuki content on my blog!! love that <3 This somehow has me thinking of vampire Yuki......

Gloves flew through the garage, one landed on a stack of tires the other fell to the ground and was left there. He ran a hand trough his black strands, muttering something while walking down the pit lane. Some worried looks were thrown his way, but that only made him angrier. He didn’t need any pity, who did they think he was? He could swear that he felt his blood blubber and boil in his veins.

While fidgeting with the baseball cap in your hands, you closely watch the screen, a camera was being shoved in Yuki’s face. God, this feels like watching some stupid drama show and not a sports program. His now ungloved hands were balled into fists and his expression looked sour, or at least the look in his eyes did, since he was still wearing his helmet. With a swift movement Yuki escaped the media and made a run for the team hospitality, where you had been waiting for him. You would’ve watched the race from the pit wall, but a terrible headache had come over you. The sun was cruelly shining, and your headache just got worse, so you retreated inside to take some meds.

The door was closed, not so gently though. You heard muffled steps and the low rumble of your boyfriend. He was easygoing and a fun guy for sure, but he was also very critical of himself. Whenever he didn’t place well, Yuki always thought that it was his fault alone. A few moments pass and a head of raven hair peeked trough the door. With little to no care he slid of his shoes and kicked them aside before taking a few quick steps towards you. Knowing how he must feel you rushed off your chair and immediately into his arms. “Hey there.” The whisper that fell from your lips was very quiet, only you two could hear it. Well, there weren’t many people around anyways, but you still kept your voice low. His shoulders were tense and maybe it was your imagination, but he seemed to be shaking with anger. “I don’t wanna think about this bullshit right now.” Yuki scoffed slightly, his silky black hair was messed up from the balaclava and his eyes darted around the room in a nervous manner. He slid one of his hands behind your neck, like a threatening snake, but you know that he’ll always be careful with you. With a swift motion, he had pulled you into a kiss. It was hungry, even starving. There was a longing sensation in the way his breath trickled down your cheek, he wasn’t begging. He was demanding.

A soft gasp fell from your lips, then a small hum of pleasure slipped out too. His eyes darted up to yours, it almost seemed as if his pupils were dilated like a cat who had just discovered it’s prey. His hand came up from underneath your shirt and gripped your throat. Yuki’s body was pressed against yours, squishing you in between his warmth and the door of his driver’s room. Your blood was stirring and swirling around your veins, a tingly feeling had sat itself in your stomach. Admittedly, you felt bad for Yuki but something about him being furious is so irresistible.  The thoughts in your head were shushed away by the growing feeling of dizziness, his hand hadn’t left your neck yet and you were struggling to get any air. A smile tugged at his lips, before he loosened his grip and pressed a few kisses along your jaw. Heavy breaths made your chest heave and sink, you gently pushed your boyfriend backwards. Your gaze darted towards his dark eyes. They were almost completely black, only from very close up you could see a hint of brown in them.

The back of Yuki’s legs hit his chair, which was pulled out from underneath the desk. He reached back and scooched the chair closer to him, and then sat down. He tauntingly tilted his head, waiting for your next move. His eyes were trained on yours, it almost seemed as if he was testing you. But you weren’t gonna let him have this. You too tilted your head, keeping eye contact with him. The driver’s rooms are small, so only a few steps were enough for you to stand right in front of him. His dark lashes fluttered while his characteristic smile spread over his face. “Come here.”, he whispered while gesturing to his lap. You were about to swing your leg over his, as he quickly turned around you your back was pressed closely to his chest. He reached around your torso and began unbuckling your belt. His lips lingered over your neck; his breath felt awfully hot on your skin. Yuki’s soft kisses quickly turned into love bites and his hand was teasing you trough your underwear. This was too much and too little at once, you could’ve exploded right there. In a swift motion, he had pulled down your boxers. The cold air hit your member and a shiver ran down your back, this made Yuki smile, you could feel it on your neck. His left hand massaged your thigh while his other one gently took your cock and began stroking it slowly. Way too slowly. Out of desperation you bucked into his hand, earning you a chuckle and a light slap on your thigh. A sweet whine escaped your throat, and you leaned your head back against Yuki’s shoulder. Your boyfriend hummed in approval, “Does that feel good?” Yes, it did. God, it was fucking incredible. Caught in a haze, you could only stammer out what seemed to resemble a weak ‘yes’. Soon after he sped up his movement, tightening his grip around your dick slightly, shortly after being rewarded loud gasps from you. He was enjoying this scene, it put him at ease. You were melting like putty in his hands, in moments like these he could do anything with you. This sense of control pleased him tremendously, but this was a mutual game.

Yuki bit down on your shoulder, leaving deep teeth marks in your skin. One day you would have to get those trending bitemark tattoos for sure. But for now, the pulsing raspberry redness was more than enough. Once again, he sped up and kept kissing your now sensitive, irritated skin. A hot, sweet feeling was pooling in your stomach. A stinging sharp pain surged through your neck. And before you knew-

-it had stopped. Yuki’s teeth were sunken deep into your skin, when he let off small droplets of blood began pooling in the dents his teeth had left. They were crimson red and looked like beautiful red pearls. You whined and winded in his touch, from pain, frustration but mostly from want. He delicately hummed before gently licking a long stripe from your shoulder up to your jaw, savoring the iron-like taste of your blood. “Love you.”, he whispered before he began jerking you off again.

[cielles-random-vault]

ATSV CHARACTERS AT THE BEACH!!?!?!?!?!?!?!,

i just came (haha funny word) home from the beach and im hella exhausted but :3 it's been a while since i last posted smth "real" on here so there i go 🕺🏻

(apologies to @ukranianacearo im working on your request i promise my computer keeps dying and the heat make it hell to finish BUT we 🆙️ 🫡)

SO content :3 // headcanons only, miguel, hobie, both miles and peter b parker are included :D and indeed gender neutral reader,, enjoy 🕺🏻🫶🏼

also idk if that makes sense but reader is in a separate relationship with all the characters and slightly ooc everyone 🫡

☆ hobie is the one who proposed going to the beach and you'd be the only one who hyped him up. the hardest spidersociety's member to convince obviously being miguel, you ran to lyla to do so. (since he has a soft spot for her he said yes, not for fun but to watch on you and the others. (but he actually ends up having fun)

"come on, it'll be fun!plus, it would be a shame to not come since it's like 35 degrees outside, and it'd give you a well-deserved vacation"

+ he's the kind to throw you in the freezing water because he'd find it funny how you're mad at him afterwards (but you never stay mad at him for a long time because look at that man. he is a slut. (in a pretty way) + he's also the kind of boyfriend to carry you on his shoulders to like. idk what's that's called but like he'd have on his shoulders and fight another person on another's shoulders. (you would lose bc you didn't stop moving)

☆ miguel would be the grumpy kind for sure. he came there because he knew that'd make him happy and you know he can't help it when it comes to his sunshine <3 (guess lyla isn't his only soft spot X)) he would definitely hold you like a princess in the water and teach you how to swim if you don't know how to,, he'd even find it cute

(in a soft tone) "why do you want to go to the beach? to learn how to swim? OK i'll gladly teach you :D"

and then he'd just turn into the softest teacher ever bc it'd remind him of teaching his daughter. eventually you didn't succeed at learning how to swim, but at least you spent a very wholesome moment together :D

☆peter would be the crackhead dad XD i js feel like you'd be the one watching him and mayday and even help him teach mayday to swim :3 + he'd be like super hyper because going to the beach isn't something he does often bc of his spiderman job and stuff so :3

"what did you say?? you want to go to the beach with me and mayday?? YES PLEASE. ITS BEEN YEARS SINCE I HAD ANY FORM OF ENTERTAINMENT."

☆ 1610 miles would be so hype bc he never went to the beach before, so going with his partner for the first time? he sure is happy :D

"wait?!?!?! is this a kind of date? this is so cool!!!"

but then the heat would just make you too tired to actually swim so you'd just chill, like cuddles and stuff

☆earth 42 miles wouldn't be hyped at first because he's more of an indoors person, like to him going outside when it's already hot us unuseful

"don't you want to stay inside? not gonna lie, im a bit lazy to go out right now."

but he accepts, and he had more fun than he would ever admit

the two last ones seem hurried im sorry 😭😭😭

but :> hope you enjoyed!

please reblog it helps a lot with reach, please, and thank you!

[celestie0]

i've always wondered have you ever given the y/n in your fics a personality description? like everything about her just ties the whole story together yet the reader can actually, embody her in some way?? that's one of the things that makes your writing so enjoyable to read and i've always wondered if you see yourself in her when u write ;

IDK HOW TO EXPLAIN IT BUT i hope u know what i mean 💔💔

love u loads btw you're like my comfort writer as we speak

GASP i have neverrr actually, i dont think i’ve formally sat down n really given any of my characters personality descriptions i just kinda have a vibe of them in my head haha but this has intrigued me 🤔 I KINDA WANNA MAKE EM NOW!!! (i hope this is what u mean by character descriptions btw hahah)

kickoff reader.

i think she is a little self conscious at times, easily affected by things going on in her life, definitely tries to bite off more than she can chew, and she’s an anxious avoidant until she can’t take it anymore and becomes overtly confrontational instead alskdjdh i think this can be seen in the way she confesses to gojo, in her interactions w kai, and then also her turning down the newsletter job before she realized it was actually a good opportunity, etc etc. when i write for her, i kinda wanna give the vibe of tired college student that has a lot going on in her head n in her heart, but she’s slowly starting to learn to live again and is looking forward to life after college (aka me all of my senior year loool) i think she has a pretty neutral personality overall :0

in holy matriphony reader.

omg i haven’t written much for ihm reader yet but i already ADORE her so so so much based on what i’ve got planned for the series, and i think i understand her the most of the oc’s i’ve made. she is someone that gets crazy tunnel vision, can only really focus on one thing at a time, often neglects her other responsibilities if it means getting The Main One done, she is hella jaded because of all the financial stress, work stress and caretaking stress which means she doesn’t have much of a filter anymore, she’s very cynical and pessimistic and easily irritated and prideful BUT…..deep down she’s a huge softie and is actually very self aware of her flaws n just really wants to get better but she just can’t find a moment to breathe…im gonna enjoy writing for her bc i think she’ll come off irrational and a bit over the top at times, but in those soft moments, she’ll be very down to earth :)

in another life reader.

aww i haven’t had too much written for ial reader yet, but in my head i picture her as a veeeery soft spoken, sweet natured woman in her older age (she’s engaged to nanami, who i imagine has mellowed her out in comparison to when she dated bad boy choso lol), idk i think she’s kind of basic 😭 not that that’s a bad thing at all, i kinda wanted that dynamic of crazy rock star lifestyle choso mixed w simple lifestyle reader (for when they meet again later in life). when she was younger, she was highly impressionable, often thought she was more mature than she actually was, n loves veeeerryy deeply, so much so to where old scars hurt even after years and years. i think she always tries to do the right thing, but bc of her conflicting emotions, she has the capacity to cause a lot of hurt

AHH idk this is just the vibe i get from them or try to encapsulate while i write them, and i also totally think readers can have diff interpretations of them than me and still be accurate about it (idk as the author i don’t feel like i even know everything ab my own stories sldkdjdh at times i feel some of my readers know more than me haha)

i think kickoff reader is the most confusing in my head, but i like it that way because i suppose she’s the youngest and she’s in college and it makes sense for her since she’s figuring herself out

i definitely do see myself in all of them!! i have certain attributes i share n some that i don’t. for example i don’t think i’m as brave as kickoff reader (to pursue passions or confess to a boy so brazenly or slap tf outta someone at a bar LOL) and i don’t think i’m as crass or no-filter as ihm reader for example, but i definitely relate to certain aspects like the tunnel vision, anxious avoidance, and stuff like that!! but i still try to make them their own characters i suppose, but it really depends on how i want their personalities to mesh w the love interest as well

GOSH THIS IS A LONG FUCKIN ANSWER MY BAD i was just so intrigued by this ask xD i’m soooo sososoossooo happy to be your comfort writer and that you enjoy my works 🥺💕you guys keep my passion alive n i’m always so grateful for you all <33 have a wonderful day/night!! 🧚‍♀️✨ilyy

[remedyturtles]

hello! i saw some other ppl complimenting you and figured i might as well send my thoughts cause i love your work too!

i like a lot about your fics, but one thing that inspired me specifically is how you can create like. in jokes? really naturally and have them repeat in ways that still feel natural for the characters (so, like the nyan cat joke in fire escape, or the burger joke also in fire escape). it makes the story feel so cohesive, and makes me hope that one day I'll be able to write similar things too! kind of a small detail but i rly liked it/gen. sorry if this doesn't make 100% sense i am very tired, feel free to delete this ask if its wierd at all or is just incoherent, im trying to verbalize emotions that are hard to verbalize

awwww mate thank you so much!!! inside jokes make me very happy haha — i distinctively remember saying something along the lines of ‘I’m going to emotionally weaponize the nyan cat song’ during my planning process lmao

cheers!!! i hope you have fun and enjoy any art you create, that is always the best part!

[paging-possum]

Jadele ask time,,,josh is included in this actually I have thoughts about him as well...

-Janette genuinely thinks her and Adele are good friends until she finds out about Josh. Adele's always like 'haha will they won't they' about her and janette plays along thinking its a joke but adele didn't mean it that way head in hands

-Josh can play the drums!! He had a chance in his 20's to join a band with some guys in the city and leave Adele but he chose not too and ended up in the canon :( he could sing midwestern emo

-There are a bunch of new ocs in the main story and one of them is a teen called Eli who HATES janette and helps Adele burn down the church-Adele was like "i hate her" and Eli goes 'what if we burnt down the church'. Terrible duo

also thinking about drawing josh/janette/adele in different time periods. for no reason other than different fashion lmao (I hope this made sense my brain is so tired)

HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE JANETTE TO FIND OUT ABOUT JOSH GOOD LORD.....finding out the woman who keeps making jokes about the two of you dating has a husband must have been wild for her....Josh playing the drums is AWESOME!!! very sad he didn't get the chance to be in a proper band :( does he regret not joining? or wish that he could join a band now? also TERRIBLE HORRIBLE TEEN TO BE A BAD INFLUENCE ON ADELE....cringe teen for my fail duo im OBSESSED. do you have any drawings of them?? and drawing them in different time period styles would be so cool....would it be the same for all of them or are they all different styles....

[solei-eclipse]

Sending this as an ask cause I don't think tumblr is going to let me send this full thing in the reply of your last post:

Your wellbeing is more important than anything else! It's okay if you miss stuff or are too tired to participate when things happen within the community; it's okay if you're not as fixated on Alien Stage anymore; just because you are admittedly seen as one of the bigger ALNST bloggers on Tumblr does NOT mean that you owe anyone anything. That goes for the OC stuff too. Sorry if this is a bit too personal, but we enjoy seeing you around not because of what you can provide but because you’re you, and we just enjoy your presence; it's as simple as that. We love you Para, and we just want you to be okay.

It's not too personal at all, no worries :) in fact, it was really nice to read when I first saw it. thank you for all your reassurances, you have no idea the wonders it did for me.

thank you for your kindness, im genuinely really grateful for all this understanding. there's a lot of stuff that I've been forced to deal with lately and while the current issue is thankfully over, I know another one is bound to pop up soon. It's okay, though! I'll manage, it'll just take some time. I hope you guys can forgive me for going silent on occasion... I'm still here! Just busy.

Honestly I've been a little more comfortable on this sideblog than on shkingpardigm... that blog has a great deal of followers and while I will always be grateful for it, admittedly I've been more cautious. I always worry about saying the wrong thing, haha... (I find I still do very often though) The rapid growth of that blog was both fascinating and startling. Now that it's become bigger, I've been worried about whether or not my passion for ALNST is enough. I'm not sure when I'll be able to get to all the requests and thoughts shared with me over there, but I really hope to answer eventually because I want to honor the time and effort others spent into writing them. It's just been so much lately, and I can barely find the right words anymore. I almost always feel guilty for posting when I haven't answered them yet, especially since I love reading them and am really grateful to receive them.

It's been a little easier on here, where I've been creating my own things and sharing these creations with others, building our things around each other and such. Thank you all for being so wonderful and kind.

I hope this doesn't come off as me being ungrateful. I've been worried about voicing these thoughts for a while because I know how disheartening it may sound. I love ALNST, I love every ask and submission I receive no matter if it's a few short words or entire lengthy essays, and I love sharing thoughts and creations with others. There's just so much I want to do and so little time, so little energy I have left especially with my degrading health. All I can do at this point is ask for patience and forgiveness. Me bones don't work like they used to, youngsters.... arghhh my back.... my scoliosis..... my debts..

Once again, still here! Always will be (menacingly), just don't be too worried if I disappear sometimes!! That's me going out there and fighting the Horrors™. I always feel such a sense of joy and relief when I come back to Tumblr and see everyone's posts and creations (ALNST or OC or anything, really). It's like a reprieve for me, seeing all the new things that have been posted.

Thanks again for all your concern and support, I want you guys to know that I return it tenfold and hope you take care of yourselves as well. All the same applies to you! Take a step back whenever necessary, always prioritize yourself and know that you aren't pressured or expected of anything. You will still be loved and cared for no matter what! Always take your time and do what makes you happy :) <3

[tojikai]

I just finished the “home” series, i just found your account yesterday yet all that’s left for me to read is “permanent mark”🙃

Like the “fix you” series, i ended up with alot of questions which is weird because i don’t have any for sundered but then again, im more of a toji girl

Questions:

- why did toji cheat?

- What happened in their marriage for it to get like that?

- did he ever truly fall out of love?

- do you have any plans for another story series?

- what would’ve happened if she hadn’t died?

- would’ve he regretted it or come back to her eventually?

- did he think of her daily after her death?

- how was he feeling after her death, years after?

- why did he put his mistress over his wife?

- Does he love his mistress more

- what’s up with the whole thing he did/him putting her over his wife

- what was his thought process when it first happened and after it kept happening

- ik he said he didn’t love hana but why would he cheat and basically put her over his wife if he didn’t?!?!

- i read 3 out of 4 stories so far and it seems like there a pattern of dudes putting someone they think they love yet don’t over someone they do or love more, is there any reason’s for it

Just me rambling about the story and your other stories:

I know he did but i hope toji suffers so so so much more until his last breath! (He did but I hope it felt like it was infinite for him😌) also Fuck hana! Wtf😭😭 if only toji didn’t fuck up bro its so sad, im hating yet understanding him?? If that makes sense, actually no not understanding but sympathetic towards him in the first ending ig but still fuck toji!!! I felt bad for him and then the next life chapter??? With his thoughts wtf and putting hana over y/n again😭 fuck toji!! he basically emotionally cheated if i was y/n i would’ve lefttt!! I swear your y/n’s are saints compared to me shhsjs

Your stories are so beautifully written yet so sad

I love them even if i might hate the love interest lol

Im More of the resentment type so it feels so silly to say this especially over a fanfic(but then again all of yours are so wonderfully written) but your stories i guess have made me possibly see things in a different light: like ppl do make mistakes and can change or genuinely regret them or that people can maybe hurt the people they love which is so weird for me to say because its a story and also im the type to refuse to believe you can love someone after you treated them so badly or cheated on them. Ig ur stories have made me realizes humans make mistakes and they aren’t BAD people for it butt the pppl they hurt doesn’t have to take them back nor forgive them or they can and it lean to something better than what would’ve been if they ended things

Note:

Im so sorry if im asking too much and i hope im not bothering you, i just tend to talk alot regarding things that i get invested in and i get so curious sbsjsj

Im probably writing this much because im so sleepy right now haha (my apologies especially if i wrote so much nonsense or I didn’t write/explain things wellh

thank you in advance if you answer 🫶i appreciate it, have a good day/night🖤i hope y enjoy the remaining of summer! Tysm for creating these masterpieces ‼️

hiii omg thanks so much, im glad that you enjoyed them <3

- to answer the first 3 questions: toji cheated bc he was bored. i have no excuses for this man in home series bc he really cheated bc their rs was getting a bit dull for him. do u know that point they say in some lovers' relationship. the drought, the feeling similar to "falling out of love" but they say not to leave your partner during this time bc that's when true love begins? yeah that. 🥹 he didn't really fell out of love but it's like a similar feeling to it.

- as for plans for another series, i'm thinking of doing a mini one. i have a draft here just waiting to be polished and published.

- if yn didn't die, hmm... assuming they stayed together, it's gonna be a very dead relationship. bc yn is so so tired. not just emotionally but mentally too. she's gonna have a hard time believing that toji still loves her even if he tried to explain. she's gonna be very reserved and visibly uncomfortable around him, thinking that he doesn't really want to be w her and just staying out of pity. she's gonna limit herself, and the love that she shows him. it will ultimately end in divorce, and he's gonna end up not wanting to sign it.

- yes, toji would've still regretted it even if yn didn't die. he's bound to come back to yn eventually. the day he left, he never planned on staying with his mistress for long. he just went there bc he was frustrated and he's trying to run away from yn's confrontation and the consequences. deep inside he was hoping that yn won't push through w the 'divorce.'

- for the 7th and 8th question, yes toji thought of yn every day and every night. the onyl time he's not thinking of her is when he's swarmed with work. but even during those times, his mind wanders to her still. the feeling that he felt when he learned of her death and discovered how she prepared everything for him and his new life was how he felt his whole life. it was never lessened. if anything it only got worse w time.

- for the 9th, 10th and 11th question: no, he didn't love his mistress more than yn. he left and put his mistress over his wife bc he thought that's what he wanted. there was a sense of thrill, the feeling of being with someone new that pushed him to act like that. as mentioned in the home series, his pride took over and he thought that that's the freedom that he wanted but it wasn't. it was too late when he realized that. you really don't know what you got until it's gone. he thought yn's gonna be there forever and that's why he kept choosing to go to his mistress not knowing that yn's days were numbered and that he's about to lose her.

- when he first cheated w her out of pure lust. there was no deeper meaning to it. and then it kept happening bc he found escape and thrill in it. other than that, she gives him a different type of attention, something new.

- w hana it was the attraction that made him act like that. im not saying all people, but some tend to be nice to attractive people and they don't even notice that to impress a new one, they end up neglecting another one. other than that, it's bc they work together. he doesn't plan on getting it on w her tho. he loves yn.

- i just like the thought of them making mistakes to learn from LMAO but i guess the difference is in fix you, his wife's dead. it's the lack of appreciation for the present and being stuck in the past. while in sundered, uhm it's a lot of pride and he did love Naomi tho. she was so good to him. (except that 'thing' she tried to do)

it makes me happy when people say they learn something from the content i put out🥺 the fact that you guys read my masterlist also makes me happy bc it makes me realize that literature really do make something immortal AAAAA i enjoyed reading this and answering your questions~ thank you so much for the love and support you give my stories <3 hope you're having a great week ~!!

[kadextra]

after my previous post, I decided to read ahead of the manhwa now bc I can’t wait!!! and I kinda feel like writing down some liveblog thoughts here while doing it :D

here we go, starting from chapter 184

[ MAJOR SPOILERS!!!!! DO NOT CLICK if you haven’t ever read before. I’m so serious its a lot of spoilers. pls just ignore this and scroll on ]

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ummm dokja saying “oh this scenario will be fine! don’t worry i’m prepared this will be problem-free & so very easy haha :)” + getting all emotional about his friends is setting off my red flag senses so hard. dokja you still have the fate message praying on your downfall….

dokja I’m scared. Dokja I Don’t Like This

ah. hah. the demon king guy is literally dead on the floor 🧍awesome

damn I knew this couldn’t be trusted and some plot twist would happen it was never going to be that simple. someone has to take the position now. I hate you nebulaes how about you catch these hands

OH NO JOONGHYUK?? YOU STUPID IDIOT STOP

my boys are fighting o(-(

yo wait turns out the world won’t reset even if he regresses??? but still :( he won’t be able to see this to the end and will get stuck back in the loop :(( joonghyuk has changed so much from the start and I’ve grown to like him a lot he doesn’t deserve this I’ll cry

OF COURSE DOKJA GONNA SACRIFICE HIMSELF INSTEAD. ITS HIS FAVORITE HOBBY!

dokja’s self reflection of how the reason he survived all the tragedies in his life is bc of TWSA & watching how joonghyuk never gave up…. the whole “it’s because you saved me so now it’s my turn to save you” from a person directed to their favorite character and their favorite story which was their life companion…. honestly I don’t quite have words to describe the way these lines make me feel. it’s just profound and deeply relatable

gilyoung my poor son he doesn’t want his hyung to die 😭

sighs it’s too late. at least demon king dokja looks cool…. now the wings fanart I’ve seen in passing makes sense…..

he’s a goner

I am going to be completely honest. I genuinely expected to be reading more of an epic shounen-style final battle where he uses all the cool corrupted demon powers and maybe goes a little wacky because that’s usually what happens in stories when the protagonist unlocks an evil power and has to fight his friends. NOT THIS????????

the situation has zero hope and he is just standing there one sidedly taking hits from his friends who are forced to kill him. while guiding them on how to do it. smiling and offering them words of encouragement. this is so devastating I feel sick

URIEL MY BABY seeing her cry is the worst it’s torture

of course his stigma is called sacrificial will

STOP

THAT ARTWORK

THEY ARE HIS LOVED FAMILY…… HE LOVES THEM ALL N JOONGHYUK WAS YHR PERSON HE LOVED MOST I CALLED IT I want to hit something

im full on crying now

all the constellations messages of they don’t wish for his death I’m not strong enough

reading this feels like getting ripped apart limb by limb

NO WAY THE FVGTIFJFJCKN HELD BY THE NECK THING RETURNS A THIRD TIME LIKE THIS??? STOOOPPPPPPPP

uriel T-T

he died

demon king of salvation

need to just lay here for a bit

ok I’m back joonghyuk is disassociating from the grief. relatable

“What if Yoo Joonghyuk went back and there was no Kim Dokja? or what if Kim Dokja never acted like this again? Yoo Joonghyuk was afraid of something for the first time.”

“He met Kim Dokja in his third regression and they became companions. Then he lost Kim Dokja”

he cares for him so much

a scenario without dokja.

whag did I just read

-

UGH that was so good. emotional damage was an understatement now I get why ppl were warning me

why did I decide to do this in the middle of the night…. I need to stop now I’m tired but how am I going to sleep? im haunted with thoughts

it’ll take a bit longer for the manhwa to adapt this part but I’m honestly really glad I continued reading and got to imagine it all myself in detail first- it hit so hard. I’ll let it sit and take a few days break before I continue. excited to see how they adapt it into drawings and cry all over again cause this wound ain’t healing for a while

I have the need to recommend this story to all my friends and family

oh right!!!!

the other day I went through youtube animatics & saved some that I could watch when finishing certain chapters into a note (thank goodness most put a warning of when to watch in the first few seconds!)

since I finished 188, I get to watch this one :D

I just watched it

I cry myself to sleep

[yuraslefttoe]

hey, it's me again! I came to pester you with questions!! *there should be a scary laugh, but it sounds more like mean giggles*

(by the way, I’m thinking about sending you such long texts with questions (because I have a lot of them!!) once one or two weeks, if you don’t mind. . . . . . .you don't mind..??? (god, I hope you don’t get tired of me..!) I'm so sorry, please, I'm just very interested!! *qwq*)

ok, let's start with the sweetest part, prelude. ACTUALLY, I DIDN'T EXPECT THAT YOU REPLY SO QUICKLY, GOD, NOT PASSED A FEW HOURS!!!!!! I THOUGHT YOU HAD TOO MANY QUESTIONS SO I DID NOT EXPECT A SO SOON REPLY!!

I’ll remind you once again how much I adore your work (after all, you deserve it!!), and I’ll also say that I specifically shouldn’t talk about posts tagged with the  adm, because I’ve read your tumblr and twitter in its entirety several times, I even have a separate album in my gallery with answers that particularly interested me, there are several hundred screenshots there and I don’t regret anything! (sorry if my hyperfixation may be intimidating!!)

*=^._.^= ∫*

and now the questions!!!! 

1. my wife doesn’t have a tumblr, but her suggestion interested me and can be seen in the first two screenshots(the translation sounds like: “after the release of “red hour” I have an assumption that andrey is more... athletic than misha. either this is because of ferry’s drawing style, or he really has such wide shoulders")so now we are interested to know about the physique of your characters!! maybe some of them are thin, or vice versa, a little overweight. and what about physical training? did you have any headcanons for this??? ( by the way, when I ask about “characters” I mean not only misha and andrey, but also europe and maya, because they are also worthy of attention <зз) 

2. what about the abbreviation "dyusha" for andrey? in russian it is... not used very often, but still, it sounds very cute. so it would be interesting to know how you would feel about this? 3. I also want to hear about the names of the characters!! how did you choose them? I mean........ how did it happen that from ☺europa☺ you switched to 👹MiKhAiL👹?? (I'M SO SORRY, BUT MISHA'S FULL NAME SOUNDS SOMETHING THREATENING. MY UNCLE'S DOG HAS THE SAME NAME EHE- *ᕕ(ಥ▽ಥ)ᕗ*) 

4. and lastly, let's return to my wife for another moment. she suggested that andrey was now also in a time loop. what do you say about that? and also in enigma, she noticed that misha seemed to be addressing the second person in the lines: "and if you wanted to be anything more than just free" and "you’ve seen a hundred lies I see that all the time". is this second person a viewer? or maybe one of the previously mentioned characters??

the last photo, by the way, is one of the sketches that I found so far in my gallery! ^^ 

initially it was planned to attach two sketches, but andrey turned out TOO bad, I’m ashamed to show him. someday I'll redraw it into something normal.... maybe. but! I really like the pic with misha and the wolf(I hope this is the wolf you were talking about lol. google didn’t show me anything else, and I’ve never been to ikea myself, ehe...) 

(and I don’t want to post all this yet, because running a tumblr was certainly not part of my plans, haha)) I registered here solely to read your blog, and not to maintain my own) 

sorry again for possible illiteracy, and also for the chaotic nature of my thoughts, haha, I don’t know how to adequately express them in english.. and also, I’m really REALLY apologize that the text was too long, next time I’ll try to be shorter...

okay im gonna try and answer everything here in a coherent way so sorry if nothing makes sense

im just fine with lotes of questions :) answering asks and responding to comments is one of my favorite things ever and i brings a verry big smile to my face

on andrei: i consider him to be a skinny little gut but not exactly unathletic, and in addition i think he would have basic combat training and probably be good with firearms. misha is probably a very average bodytype, nothing special, not particularly athletic.

i do not speak russian (though ferry has recently encouraged me to learn so maybe in like four years ill be able to form a sentence) so i dont know anything about the short forms so you can do whatever you want. if you coin it and peoples tart calling him that i will not stop it from happening

i do not name my characters, i usually let me friends name them (i think that the only one i named was europa and his partner). going forward maybe ill try to make it more cohesive

the time loop idea im seeing thrown around alot is really cool and while i havent particularly wrote any of my songs about that in general i see it fitting into the loose narrative i have going on. also in enigma misha is definitely talking to andrei whenever he says the word "you" but it could also be to the listener because the entire theme of enigma is 4th wall breaking and meta shenanigans like that

that sketch is SO CUTE oh my god

[milkbath69]

You're not wrong about Michael being very pretty. I definitely only like Michael because he's pretty and looks like Jim Morrison. He's super bitchy, so that's really the only thing he's got going for him, haha. It's actually kind of shocking that the supposed hero of the story is so...bitchy. Hell, even Nanook was tired of him being such a mean hoe bag to his family and tried to end him.

Speaking of Jim, what exactly about the Doors appeals to you? Their sound? The lyricsm? The mythos surrounding Jim? And what are your favourite songs? Mine is Touch Me, Light my Fire, End of the Night, Backdoor Man, Gloria, Wintertime Love. There are honestly too many to count.

And finally, what about the Lost Boys do you like so much?

Sorry for the abundance of questions. It's just exciting to see someone with so many similar interests.

nono i dont mind the questions i love them actually!! :D ask as many as you want i love it im just soo embarrassed the first two times you sent me an ask you had to click a button rhat said "lactate now" omfg i had no idea it still said that i am so sorry i set it to that like four years ago

anyways anyways

i kinda love that michael is super bitchy yk i dont really like protags that are like "good" people if that makes sense

the doors appeals to me for so many different reasons tbh. their sound is a big part of it though. i adore it when their songs have those long instrumental breaks especially with ray going crazy on the keyboard omg. i also love jims voice i just find it so soothing yk? i used to listen to them in pitch darkness while laying on the floor (best thing ever btw) as for the lyrics mmm i do appreciate the doors for their lyricism especially in songs like feast of friends (favorite doors song btw), the end, and riders on the storm but also on the flipside they have songs like lament (which is song ONLY about jims cock (unless theres like a deeper meaning i have no clue)) and gloria which is just about REALLY wanting to fuck this girl (another fav of mine)

you have such good taste in the doors omg!! i like basically all the songs you do except light my fire (its overplayed im sorry)

as for the lost boys its kinda hard for me to pin down what certain things i like about it as opposed to The Fly (which is my favorite movie of all time) but i guess it would be like how all the characters change throughout the movie especially the emersons (duh the others dont really survive (except the frog brothers. god i hate the frog brothers)) but i also just really love the whole aesthetic and music to the film yk? im sorry this wasnt as in depth as you probably were hoping but i just genuinely haven't looked that deep into the lost boys like i have with other media i love.

[femconstellation]

I know how you feel about trans women (I’m not here to debate upon that, you’re entitled to your opinions) but how do you feel about trans men? Asking because while I don’t agree with terf ideology I want to know more about it (I like knowing the opinions of people I disagree with because being informed is important!)

Feel free to delete/not interact with this ask, i don’t mind!

Hi, thank you for the v respectful ask!

I actually am of the opinion that a lot of the trans children are mistaking/having their feelings of not fitting into gender stereotypes as being trans, and that quite a few trans adults are the same way. And while I usually do refer to trans-identified males in general when im talking about the fetishizing of lesbianism/being a woman, i dont think every TiM is doing it to fetish being female or a lesbian (…but there’s quite a lot and every TiM adult I’ve met is like that). I have sympathy for young trans people who were convinced that disliking their sex = changing their gender. But I don’t have sympathy for the TiMs that say that ‘feeling like a lesbian’ or ‘feeling like they like women the way lesbians do’ is the reason they transitioned. Or say that their whole gender identity is based on VERY sexist stereotypes about women. Or the ones who straight up admit to transitioning because they think being a woman is a feeling and not something I am literally oppressed for being.

And trans men specifically - I say this as someone who former identified as nonbinary for a while, and dipped into transmasc territory. And I also have many currently-trans men or formerly-trans men friends, so it’s something I’ve witnessed as well. A lot of the things they describe as gender dysphoria — literally the effects of misogyny or fatphobia or racism. (but mostly misogyny since it directly relates to sex — but i think it is very important to mention that fatphobia and racism are both things i have witnessed being part of the reason.)

I thought i was nonbinary because I was uncomfortable with how I was viewed as a woman. The way my friends treated me for being a woman despite them mostly being female. The way any male friends I had acted towards me. And while I knew being nonbinary didn’t change how society acted towards me, I felt like I distanced myself from that misogyny. In my head, they were now silly for calling me misogynistic things because haha, I’m not a woman!

And I’ve seen this with my friends too. Friends who go through sexual trauma, discomfort with the constant sexualization of their body, male harassment, etc. tend to lean into identifying away from being a woman because they’re at least partially aware that being a woman is related to the shit that happened to them and the treatment they get.

What’s crazy is how online, if you say you like being ‘masculine’ or ‘gnc’. Or if you say you hate your breasts. Or if you say you hate being a woman. You’re called an egg and THAT side of the internet convinces you you’re trans when 99% of the time, you’re just dealing with the effects of misogyny.

So in short I think most trans men are just females who are dealing with the effects of misogyny and shit in their life and think being a man is the solution when a LOT of them would do better if they had a mental health support system that went through trying to sort out that internalized misogyny before immediately jumping to hormones. But also I don’t think lesser of TiF for that; I just think they’re better off getting support that isn’t hormones first.

Idek. I worked 14 hours today and I am tired. 😭😭 I hope this makes sense.

Also irl I don’t ‘misgender’ (use he/him pronouns for TiMs, she/her for TiF) trans people. I don’t harass trans people irl. I keep my opinions to myself irl. I just let them out on here 🌝

[livingfictional]

Hello! Can I have a rdr2 matchup, please? Im sorry if the info will be too much!

I'm 18 soon to be 19 (29/07) I do like (legal) age gaps tho! :)

Female, she/her, ExFJ 2w3, Leo Full typology: ExFJ 2w3 269 sp/so SLUAI FELV

I prefer villians and overall evil characters however I have a soft spot for kind, sweet big men :3 I prefer men in fiction

Personality:

I am pretty social, however I prefer to spend time alone! I care about others a lot… To an unhealthy amount honestly but I'm working on it! I love to help others and make them smile, but I do wish I would get something for being so nice in return, yeah it might sound greedy but I want to be appreciated! And get something nice haha, like just a compliment or something, when my helping and kindness gets unnoticed I might get upset because of how tired I am and I just want to be appreciated like I said before 😭 I wanted to be noticed and not ignored! I care too much about what others feel and think and it's tiring, I just want to be selfish sometimes and care about myself even if it sounds mean. I also love being mentioned/involved in things, it makes me feel liked <3

People call me funny! Well it all depends because everyone has a different sense of humor! But I am most of the time unserious and I love to joke around, serious situations are stressful so I prefer to be joyful, but I do like talking about serious topics (sometimes) Like I said before I love to make people smile and laugh with my jokes and overall with make them happy with presence. It's my job to make others happy <3

My humor is definitely not for everyone, it's mostly the humor of a 12 y/o kid which can be annoying to some people lmao (sometimes it's funny how people are annoyed by it) and some other things depending on how I feel. When it comes to annoyance I also like to annoy people <3 it's so fun! But I never want to make them really feel bad! Often I act like an asshole but this is just for jokes! (but sometimes I wanna be a real asshole lmao) Like I said I don't want them to actually feel bad, if I do, I will feel very guilty! When it comes to it I apologize A LOT, I apologize so much that it might too annoying but I always feel a sense of guilt inside of me. I'm also VERY sensitive and worry about everything. Ah and I'm pretty dumb and I am not trying to insult myself I am just silly hehe and I'm okay with that. Oh and Im clumsy 😭😭

People know that I am horny 24/7, like I said earlier I have a humor of a 12 y/o so there are a lot of sex jokes. I am very interested in nsfw things, kinks etc, I am the "horny" friend

Likes/Dislikes:

I LOVE LOVE horror and scary things, I can't imagine my life without it, its just a such interesting genre that makes me happy and intrigued! I adore horror games and I'm mostly interested in them, however most of the time I am scared of playing them so I just watch gameplays and stuff like that haha. You can say I am obssesed with horror! (its funny because its easy to scare me haha)

I love to eat food <3 especially sweet things

I also love cute things! Plushies, pink, clothes and other cute things! I just love it so much <3

I like games very much (I suck at them), art, anime, drawing and psychology! When it comes to music I love energetic ones!

I dislike slow music but there can be some exceptions.

I dislike cooking (I love when someone knows to cook however I suck at it

Appearance:

Around 156 cm height

Chubby

brown eyes

chin length hair with bangs

round glasses

Thank you and I hope you will have a wonderful day/night!

I hoe you enjoy, you sound like a lovely person 🎀

I match you up with… Sean!

Throws sex jokes right back at you, a horny bastard.

He’s the show off type, so he will make a big deal of how much he loves you, how amazing you are, how cute you are.

So you’ll never have an issue with feeling unappreciated around him.

Has to have his hands on you 24/7, even in public. He’s not the shy type, PDA al the way. Unless you’re not a fan, of course.

In private he will hold on to you, calloused hands rubbing over your soft skin.

He’s more of an oblivious type, loud and a bit dumb. But he always tries his best, making sure you feel loved.

[firstdivisiongirl]

Hello, Can I have a matchup please? From One piece! If not, that's totally fine!

Female, she/her, ExFJ 2w3, Leo I would prefer a guy!

I am pretty social however I prefer to spend time alone! I care about others a lot… To an unhealthy amount honestly but Im working on it! I love to help others and make them smile! :3 But I do wish I would get something for being so nice in return, yeah it might sounds greedy but I want to be appreciated! And get something nice haha, like just a compliement or something, when my helping and kindess gets unnoticed I might get upset because of how much tired I am and I just want to be a appreciated like I said before 😭 I wanted to be noticed and not ignored! I care too much what others feel and think and its tiring, I just want to be selfish sometimes and care about myself even if its sounds mean.

People call me funny! Well it all depends because everyone has different sense of humor! But I am most of the time unserious and I love to joke around, serious situations are stressful so I prefer to be joyfull, but I do like talking about serious topics (sometimes) Like I said before I love to make people smile and laugh with my jokes and overall with make them happy with presence. Its my job to make others happy <3 My humor is definitely not for everyone, its mostly humor of a 12 y/o kid which can be annoying to some people lmao (sometimes its funny how people are annoyed by it) and some other things depends on how I feel. When it comes to annoyence I also like to annoy people <3 its so fun! But I never want to make them really feel bad! Often I act like an asshole but this is just for jokes! (but sometimes I wanna be a real asshole lmao) Like I said I dont want them to actually feel bad, if I do, I will feel very guilty! When it comes to it I apologize A LOT, I apologize so much that it might too annoying but I always feel a sense of guilt inside of me. I'm also VERY sensitve and worry about everything. Ah and I'm pretty dumb and I am not trying to insult myself I am just silly hehe and I'm okay with that. Oh and Im clumsy 😭😭

I LOVE LOVE horror and scary things, I can't imagine my life without it, its just a such interesting genre that makes me happy and intrigued! I adore horror games and I'm mostly interested in them, however most of the time I am scared of playing them so I just watch gameplays and stuff like that haha. You can say I am obssesed with horror! (its funny because its easy to scare me haha) I also love cute things! Plushies, pink, clothes and other cute things! I just love it so much <3 I like games very much (I suck at them), art, anime, drawing and psychology! When it comes to music I love energetic ones! I dislike slow music but there can be some exceptions.

I dislike cooking (I love when someone knows to cook however I suck at it </3), stressful and serious situations (I stress a lot)

When it comes to looks I am around 156cm height, chin length hair with bangs, brown color eyes and I'm chubby!

Thank you so much and have a wonderful day!

Hello. Thank you for the matchup request. This one was a no brainer. There was really only one perfect match. I hope you like it!

You Got...

Monkey D Luffy!!!!!

You both have a great sense of humor and I think he would enjoy that he can laugh and joke with you.

He would be happy that you care about him and the rest of the crew. You may think it's too much, but he would think it is perfect.

He may not be able to cook, but he will get Sanji to do it for both of you.

Will insure you that you are awesome and that you don't need to apologize for anything.

Would dance with you to energetic music.

Every day with this boy would be fun!

I think he would enjoy horror movies and games. Would he be scared? No because he doesn't really understand it, but he would enjoy it.

Would want you to make drawing for on the ship. He would make you drawings too. They won't be the best, but it's the thought that counts right?

Overall, he will make you feel loved and will do anything that you enjoy. He wants to see you smile and laugh

Please do not copy, modify, translate or repost my writing on other platforms. Comments, reblogs and likes are highly appreciated!