#honesty hourrrrr lets go

[lightfoot-bros]

I wrote this mini scenario where Ian and Barley had a conversation with each other while searching for the Phoenix gem. I call it:

The Wandering

Ian walks with some fatigue now since the changing of the weather from rain to shine and walking for countless miles following these ancient ravens with Barley and half of their Dad. Ian was starting to feel doubt as he calculated the position of the sun located zenith above them which indicates it is noon by now. He couldn’t help feeling distraught that there could be a possibility that they won’t make it on time to see their father. Then Ian remembers the folded note in his jean’s pocket that their father left them about the spell of visitation.

Ian reached into his pocket while holding his staff in the other and unfolded the note displaying a drawing of a man with the sun above him, and next to it the man slowly disappearing with the sunset in the horizon. The illustration reminded him of the lack of time they have in finding that Phoenix gem; Ian reinforcing his critical thoughts on their situation that things might not go as planned. He looks at Dad who is trying to catch up with his sons despite not having an actual head to see, while Barley holds the leash guiding him. Ian realizes that they have come this far to find this ancient gem, and his brother gave up his pride and joy Guinevere to make this possible. Ian then felt the flame of ambition arising as he reshaped his walking posture to get to the end of the ravens faster. He was determined that he will see their father as a whole because that is what he wanted more than anything.

Barley is in the lead pulling Dad and notices that they have been walking for a while now and him and his brother hadn’t really talk much since he gave up his beloved Guinevere. He admits he still feels sad about it but he knows he made the right choice and he will not let Guinevere die in vain. So he tries something to lighten the mood on this quest.

“So with all this walking we must be getting closer by now,” Barley said optimistically while still walking on the path.

Ian distracted with conflicting thoughts of determination and fear of failure in his head he replied bluntly, “yeah, I hope so.”

The conversation went cold between them; so Barley’s instincts took over: “Man, it feels like we’ve been walking for hourrrrrs....Much more than when mom signed us up for Boy Scouts when we were little, remember Ian? They made us do a lot of hiking.”

Ian mentally dig through his files of memories and recalls, “Huh. Oh yeah. The campsite was near Lochlake. A lot more trees compared to here tho.” He stopped for a bit trying to make sense of his memories, “I remember them teaching us how to fish. And that was when I earned my fishing badge,” Ian said proudly.

“Oh Yeaaah! I remember! I wasn’t good at fishing,” Barley admitted.

“You keep trying to catch the fish with your bare hands.”

“Yeah because that was how mighty warriors catch their meal!” Barley remarked with zeal.

“By thrashing in the water and scaring everyone’s fishes away,” Ian said jokingly.

“Hey I used the ancient way to catch fish while you guys used the modern way,” Barley said reassuring.

Ian just shrugged and said, “Whatever you say.”

“Wait!” Barley called out. “Do you remember those lunches they fed us?”

Ian trying to remember more of his faded memories of his past and then it made Ian squinting his face and sticking out his tongue in disgust remembering it, “Ugh, yes...it tasted horrible.” Which Ian is honestly surprised faculty found a way to bring a microwave in the woods.

“Really? I thought it tasted like chicken.”

“Barley, you think every kind of meat tastes like chicken.”

“Hey, that’s not true! I can tell the difference between Burger Shire’s fried chicken and Pizza Realm’s. And obviously Pizza Realm tastes better in a land slide; and—they have laser tag,” Barley smiles brightly.

Ian chuckled, “I can’t believe my 19-year brother would play laser tag with other kids.”

“Hey, laser tag is hella fun! And these kids now a days are really good at it. And you love laser tag too.”

Ian recalled his mother bringing him and Barley to Pizza Realm on weekends and they can play arcade games for hours; they were pretty young. Ian remembered being too shy to make small talk with the other kids. He doesn’t know why he always behaved like that honestly. But he does remember Barley always inviting him over to play laser tag and they be on the same teams against the other kids. They weren’t too bad working as a team, Ian admits; it was his favorite childhood memory...But that was the past...

“Yeah when I was 9, Barley. We’re too old to play those kid games and everybody would think we’re weird.”

Barley doesn’t budge, “Hey age is just a number, bro. And I enjoy playing laser tag. If something is so fun why should I care what others think. Worrying about how other people would think just bring misery.”

Ian felt unsure how to respond to that comment. In fact, he admits he does worry how other people perceived him. Always trying to get good grades, always saying please and thank to his elders, being a good stand-up citizen. Obviously there’s nothing wrong with that. But. Its just that it never occurred to him that maybe being “perfect” is the problem...Ian felt at conflict with how he wants to be more like Dad—confident, bold and daring—and trying to hold this perfect image seemed impossible. Who is Iandore Lightfoot, really? He always asked himself that every night before drifting to sleep.

Ian responded with a low-sounding agreement looking down at the ground, “yeah....” Feeling so low with this new realization and questioning his identity.

In silence Barley noticed how Ian’s mood and tone has changed. Feeling concern for his little brother he stop walking and turned around and looked at him with reassuring presence. “Hey, I was saying all of that because that’s how I live my life, man. If there are things you don’t like doing then that’s okay. I like doing these kind of things because it makes me happy about myself—even though people can say otherwise. And Ian, I was there when you told that cyclops cop how you really think about yourself. Quite frankly you are none of those things. You’re attending honors at school, you like taking photography outside in nature, you can play chess, dude! You know I won’t try to figure out how all of that works!” Barley said enthusiastically.

Ian just looks at Barley and take in everything he said. Feeling appreciated. Not saying anything.

Barley continued, “Just these few days I’ve seen how you stayed your ground in front of the Manticore; you did an impossible left turn on the freeway leaving behind the crazy biker gang; you’ve master your fears by crossing the Bottomless Pit-”

“Barely,” Ian interrupted.

“But you’re still alive!” Barley reassured. “And you hightailed Colt and the cops!” Barley lightens up with his huge smile and raised his arms to the sky. “Bro, you’re freakin’ AWESOME!”

Ian couldn’t believe what he was hearing from his brother. Dumbfounded actually. But surprised with Barley’s words of encouragement—no, perhaps honesty. Ian stood there for a while trying to embrace it all. He felt his heart wanting to give in to the warm tears his eyes want to release. But he rubs his eyes quickly with his arm and responded to what came to his mind first by smiling, “Thank you, Barley.”

Barley is happy that his brother sees that he is more than what he thinks. “Hey don’t mentioned it,” as he put his hands on his waist appearing indifferent to the comment (which he appreciates, really). Barley looks at Dad and sees his father wanting to sit down, which he can’t blame him from all the shenagins their father experienced. He turned to Ian, “Hey we got to hurry up and get that Phoenix gem. I will carry a Dad from here and you lead the way,” he said returning a smile.

Ian felt more bolder from his brother’s comments so he took the suggestion with ease. “Sure.”

Barley picked up his father on his shoulders and Ian walked ahead.

After a while, Ian asked Barley, “So I was thinking after we meet Dad, maybe we can check out Pizza Realm. I do miss their pizza,” Ian said as a suggestion.

“OH Dude, they have this new pizza called the Triple-Meat-Eaters Pizza and it is A-MA-ZING.”

“Hahah, yeah I’m down for that,” Ian responded.

As they continued walking on the grassy field they see a raven statue at the distance pointing them to the next direction.