#honestly i like reading ur asks a lot LMAOOOO u really do a deep dive

[jihyoruri]

WELL… my opinions on aespayn… keep in mind these r my interpretations and u can correct/add on to anything.. this is just what I’ve gathered based on my experiences/interpretations.

i don’t think aespayn and karina can work. i feel like no matter what they won’t really ever get better— karina knows how to manipulate aespayn and aespayn doesn’t know who else to go to after she’s been a “safe place” for so long. aespayn has other friends to go to but like.. she doesn’t know how exactly to break away from karina. like, if she wasn’t so attached, she could just kick her out of the group.. she could stop this at any point, but she just can’t. when you’re in relationships like this, there really is no “fixing” them, there will always be that power dynamic at play and the other person will ALWAYS know how to get to you and control you. and you stay because they’re nice sometimes and you hang onto that, hoping that they’ll be nice most of the time, or you feel trapped and like you don’t have anyone else to go to or don’t deserve better. I don’t really know what opinion aespayn has of herself.. I can guess it’s not horrible, but probably not great either. she probably hates herself for staying, and wants to get away, but can’t bring herself to do it. me personally, I’ve never been in a situation like this— but I can talk about how I think money can effect this:

now, I’m not sure if any of this is true, this is just how I interpret it being someone who grew up around rich and influential people.. being surrounded by rich people ruins your ability to socialize and understand people, even worse if you’re neurodivergent or anything other than what’s considered “normal” in those circles. and aespayn is RICH rich, one of the most influential families in Korea— she was probably expected to keep up a certain image, act a certain way, couldn’t socialize with certain people, was taught certain things, I can imagine she was isolated given the fact most rich people like to only stay in their small “elite” circles. her parents didn’t want her to be an idol, but at the end of the day I think you mentioned in another ask her parents support her(?) so I can only assume they aren’t super close minded and truly love their daughter, which helps. but I think aespayn definitely might have a hard time talking to others, it’s been mentioned she’s “awkward” and I think that could be why. I don’t think she really had anyone as her safe space BEFORE karina— you can’t be friends with the rich people, they are mostly fake and really only pretend to like you for status and talk behind your back— you don’t know how to talk to the other trainees, you never learned how to act around normal people, you never had to make friends— you just grew up surrounded by prepicked options from your parents connections. this is why I think she’s so incredibly attached to karina. she may have other friends NOW, but before then she only had karina. you tend to like things that are familiar when in unfamiliar situations. NOW.. moving onto Bada— I don’t think it’s been said how/when they met, but I’ll guess through choreography or smth. now there isn’t a lot of works with them, so it’s hard for me to get a gauge on their dynamic, but it’s been said they’re close, so we can go off that. i think bada truly cares about aespayn, but I don’t know if she’s aware of her (HORRIBLE) situationship with karina.. I can see her confiding in her about it, but I could also see her hiding it.. so I’m not sure. I think to give my full opinion, I’d need to see how they progress and grow, because right now, they really just seem like good friends, which is great for her to have because… support systems when in these situations are important.

to continue this weird character analysis (that i don’t even know I got anything correct on..) I’ll say who I think aespayn should end up with.. NO ONE. for the sake of the story I know she needs to have an endgame partner, and I don’t think aespayn and Karina could ever stop being toxic, so she’s ruled out, and I haven’t seen enough of bada but ultimately I think that’s the road we’re gonna go down— I think that’s who she’ll end up with. but I think that aespayn really needs to sit down and not have anyone to connect herself to, to hold her identity. who is she without karina?? without anyone?? when she’s not a member of Aespa, not the daughter of a rich and influential family, just herself. who is aespayn?? I don’t think she knows that, and if she does it’s probably loosely. rich people don’t need to know themselves deeply, they don’t need to have crazy thoughts about the meaning of life— they just need to be charming, and polite, and good at what they do (business wise). that’s all!! they don’t have the need/hunger to know themselves or others, it’s usually just ‘how do I keep/make wealth, what do they think of me’, etc etc. they’re very focused on appearances but not on the self, which I think is detrimental to their image— especially aespayn. I think that’s why she clings onto karina— she doesn’t know how to be anything else BUT aespayn, member of aespa, daughter to a rich family, karina’s. she doesn’t know who she is without these labels. I feel like I say this for so many yns but it’s rlly only 2.. anyway.. I suspect she’ll end up with bada because I don’t see karina changing, and I don’t think she expects change either. I think she feels that no matter what she does, aespayn will always stay.

closing my thoughts on aespayn.. I do want to explore karina. karina has been shown to be extremely manipulative, consistently love bombing aespayn whenever she wants her affection, and “punishing” her by ignoring her when she does something to make her mad. karina knows(?) aespayn will “fight back” by small actions to upset her, but I don’t think she thinks she’ll ever actually leave. I think when/if this does happen, she will be surprised and angry.. I can’t tell if she views aespayn as property/“hers”? she definitely has a fucked up view of relationships, or she’s just toxic and enjoys it. She gets jealous when aespayn talks to people she’s “not supposed” to talk to, but I think karina’s DEFINITELY the type to like.. go on dates with others and TELL aespayn about it (this is all speculation).. now I think it’s been said that karina used to not be so toxic, or at least didn’t show it.. I’m curious as to what changed. did being a leader get too taxing she just wants to take out all the shit she deals with onto aespayn, someone she knows won’t leave? or does she just like controlling people? I’m not sure. I think karina is just as attached to aespayn as aespayn is to her, if not a little less? i mean.. they were friends first and foremost. that doesn’t go away. they have a very interesting relationship though, and I am a fan of toxic yuri, but in the end I don’t think she’ll change and I don’t think aespayn should suffer, so..

i will reiterate that I don’t KNOW any of this for sure, this is just how I see their relationship! maybe I’m wrong abt some things but right on others.. you’ve said aespayn stands on business and comes from a powerful family but every rich person’s kid I’ve met is truly very weak at heart/really emotionally easy to manipulate, and desperate for validation so… idk. I will say that I am not a member of an “influential” family of actors or singers or business owners.. I am apart of a medical family, who know renowned doctors and such.. but those aren’t really the people you see on tv or magazines. I’ve met the #2 eye doctor in the world, but like.. you probably haven’t heard of him!! just people who r rich but very quiet and hush hush about it.. not like celebrities. (fun fact, my dad operated on pitbull! he was his anesthesiologist. i am one person away from pitbull..) but this are just what I’ve picked up from the children of rich doctors/some business owners, NOT celebrities or actors so I don’t know how they act, but it’s safe to assume all ultra rich ppl r pretty much the same.. I’ve been around people who know celebrities and whatever.. it’s easy to blend in w people who have money, but I am NOT an expert. (I live w my mom, we’re middle class. I’m only rich 2 months out of the year 💀. i prefer it this way)

SO YEAH.. very wonky character analysis on aespayn. this could all be so wrong.. I don’t think anyone sits down to write abt yns and starts thinking about the inner workings of how rich people society fucks up your entire social ability and mental state 😭sorry for not being able to stfu..

TLDR; I don’t think she should end up with either of them until she figures herself out, but once she gets out of that life ending situationship she should/probably will end up with bada. (though I wish karina would stop being toxic and they could end up tgt.. I know it’s not meant to be)

-🎏

aespa!yn is someone who is very sure of herself, yes she was isolated (which is also a big part on why she’s pretty awkward sometimes) but that isolation really made her learn about herself. aespa!yn is the youngest in her family and has a lot of siblings and she’s known as the rebellious one, you mentioned keeping a certain image and yes that was a lot of pressure for aespa!yn but instead of trying to keep that image it actually causes her to spiral out a little, out of all her siblings she’s the most aware of herself and aware of how messed up the industry that her family is in is. If there’s one thing about aespa!yn is that she knows herself she knows herself very well that’s why in first aespa!yn work it says that she knows that she will come back to Karina.

the only time I’ve ever said aespa!yn stood on business was me implying that she stands on business when it comes to arguments with jimin but it will always be the same outcome in the end. she’s threatened so many times to kick jimin out the group because she has that power but jimin always responds about how that will affect the group and group’s downfall will be yn’s fault which causes her to reel back, yn wants to leave jimin she wants the girl out of her life but if there’s one thing youre really correct on its how attached she is to karina.

From what I’ve read it seems like to you aespa!yn doesn’t really know herself SHE DOES LOL she very much does but it’s because of her interactions with karina which makes it seem like she doesn’t, you say that the rich kids you know are actually “very weak at heart/really emotionally easy to manipulate, and desperate for validation” aespa!yn is only like that with karina because karina is someone who knows her the best, she’s someone who yn is really attached to, someone who knows aespa!yn from the inside out which causes aespa!yn to be pretty vulnerable and easy around her.

and this something that’s very apparent in the works that I have put out right now, likes take my bada and aespa!yn works for example, I feel like I made aespa!yn more playful more funny she really shows her personality in that work, when you compare it to the works with Karina aespa!yn is visibly more nervy and vulnerable in those and it’s because she’s only that way around Karina.

Honestly I can’t say much with ur opinion with bada and aespa!yn cause that will probably spoil things 😭 but ur also very correct on how Karina views things as well.

aespa!yn isn’t just your typical rich kid with problems, you can’t really look at her with that point of view, she’s extremely different 😭. richgirl!yn is definitely someone who you can analyze with that point of view like with all the stuff you were saying I was like this is more richgirl!yn than aespa!yn.

[normal-thoughts-official]

aaaand we are back back again with malec livewatch! you can read the first and second parts before if you wanna, or filter out “malec livewatch” if ur tired of this absolute bullcrap

yes i know it’s been years. not my fault okay i was studying

today: post-wedding 1×12! and finally freedom from the terrors of s1

forever a slut for that scene where Magnus just does that hand movement and a bunch of shit starts showing up in the conveniently empty table ugh we stan. imagine if the special effects had been this good all the time they really used up 10 out of their 15 dollars and all the two favors from cousin Mike for this one. 1×12 was so inspired tbh only valid episode

Alec's clothes look so much better without the stupid ugly blazer? could do without the high waisted pants (why) but he looks so much better and also more comfortable. again i hope the costume department staff got a big, fat paycheck because the difference we see in him during the wedding vs post-wedding alone is just insane. he looks so much better and more comfortable and more himself, the blazer made him look stiff and again DOESNT MATCH THE REST. also nice touch that the blazer is the only part of his clothing with gold, the sh wedding color. he gets that off and everything looks so much better

Magnus looks even better post wedding too. like the clothing is already *chef's kiss* but he looks even prettier afterwards somehow. the hair is a little softer and he's less stiff as a whole (for obvious reasons), and aaaa hes so beautifulllll he's so prettyyyy look at his perfect soft little hair falling softly over his head and the PINK STREAKS possibly the best Magnus look i said what i said. especially with him all soft and smiley like that i big love him

sexiest thing about Magnus is how Jace does anything and hes like NO BITCH

the way he says "warlock tracking is stronger" with that smile......... hes so prety

that's a deep inhale he makes before using the tracking spell lmao u ok buddy?

oof i can only imagine how he felt when he was doing the tracking and he was suddenly hit with an image of Camille screaming and hitting in his direction,,,....,,,,,,, Fuck

love how Raphael just locked her in the basement thats so sexy of him we stan

"i punched her there's no way she'll help me" ugh still salty that clary of all ppl got to punch her but not Raphael or Magnus fuck this tbh

STOP MAKING ME LOOK AT CLACE

they both look so giddy and happy to be talking after the whole wedding thing + camille drama like don’t look at me. alec can barely look at magnus because he’s so agitated but you have the smile on his face and magnus is also smiling disbelievingly and i just doaudjsuoiadsa i love they

seriously tho the way magnus smiles..... so private and disbelieving but also so obvious and he’s even looking down like he never expected stuff to go down this well..... bro i stan

i had forgotten about the specific cadence in which alec talks? lmao. there’s a certain tilt to his voice when he says “it’s so INTENSE” that i really love

also that’s a really funny line like honey who the fuck are you to complain about anything being intense. ur the most dive or die bitch in this entire building. and we stan

alec’s WIDE ASS SMILE when magnus says “you certainly know how to make a statement” I CRY. magnus looks so proud of him and still disbelieving that alec went this hard for him and alec is just still on cloud 9 that he really Did That and came out and magnus is just proud of him and wow he really gets to have this and duahdsudhsadajsas???? i adore everything about them

the way maryse shows up and magnus immediately recoils and alec immediately straightens up like magnus is lowkey expecting rejection and alec is just bracing himself for one of the hardest fights of his life

also their expressions are so funny like maryse is LIVID she’s absolutely losing her mcfucking mind with anger homegirl’s head is about to explode and robert is just looking like he pissed on the carpet or something

the way alec doesn’t back down at all is so admirable too like!!!! it’s one thing to make a big fuck you gesture, it’s another to still hold your ground against your abusers after that fact. but he really stands there and goes “this isn’t about you” “i’m the same person i’ve always been” and doesn’t give her an inch of room for clownery. like again once alexander gideon lightwood makes up his mind there’s no stopping him and there’s no going back and he’s just so fucking strong??? he really said “from now on i’m out and you’re going to absolutely deal with that and i will not compromise a single thing” and the lightwoods just had to deal with that lmaoooo 

you can see it in maryse’s face too, like after the “i’m the same person i’ve always been” she just pauses, realizing that she lost this battle without even knowing, she was on top of it a second ago and now there’s nothing she can do anymore and she’s just shook. and all that’s left for her is to scoff at magnus and leave, because that’s it, she lost every hold she had on him

alec’s little mouthed “what?” at “and all for a downworlder” too. i think part of him was like “wow she’s backing down already?” because you know he expected this to be a lot harder i think lmao. but i also like to think that there’s a side of “mom what the fucking fuck have you seen him he’s gorgeous and kind and smart and amazing and literally the best person i could have fallen in love with but go off i guess”

robert going all “just give her time” like he doesn’t understand what’s happening here at all. he clearly plays the “good cop” in the lightwood’s abusive dynamic tbh, like people often brush him off as being just spineless but i honestly think that he’s just the other side of her manipulative coin. specially with izzy, like, when izzy said fuck it and completely let go of maryse’s hold on her? that’s where robert came in, being the accepting, “nice” parent who listened to her and cared, and making sure she’d keep her loyalties. because he didn’t really stand up for izzy either and in the end he kept her still glued to the lightwood family through that, and kept defending maryse and izzy listened to him because he was robert. and i think that’s what’s happening here too, him trying to frame this as “don’t worry, she’ll come around” because he knows right then that alec is absolutely going to turn their back on them if that’s what it takes for her to be happy so he immediately slides in and reframes this under an affection light where everything will be alright! even if honestly i don’t think that’s what alec is really thinking about at all, i think he was 100% ready for a showdown 

and robert is clearly so disapproving and yikes at the whole thing too but he pretends he isn’t and like lmao

shoutout to their faces when robert asks “are you two in love?” like magnus just turns around like oh hell no we’re not gonna have this conversation and alec lights up for just a second with a small smile before he’s like wait wait no shit shit shit we’ve just met no of course there’s no love (and like... i don’t think there is per se, because i think love is something that takes longer to settle in, specially for alec, but i think the idea that he could talk openly about being in love with a man and even fall fully in love with magnus one day makes him super happy you know?) lmao dorks

tho tbh i think magnus shuts down that conversation immediately to avoid heartbreak. because i think that for this whole thing he was expecting alec to say something he’d hate hearing to get his parents’ approval, you know? like like i said it’s really unexpected and surprising/inspiring that alec didn’t back down an inch there, and i think he was expecting alec to kind of fall back slightly now, like, he played his cards and now he would negotiate with them, you know? find a place to make them comfortable. instead alec gives them a complete fuck you and he’s like... damn obviously super pleased but also waiting for the other shoe to drop

he just steps in like “pls no” and stops that conversation right there 

the way alec takes a deep breath and magnus opens his mouth then closes again quickly not knowing what to say and then changes the subject.... he’s really so scared of this talk and i just aaa

alec literally never fucking stops going from magnus’ eyes and lips in quick succession like alec. alec please. stop being horny for just a second man. please alec i’m begging you

it’s so cute how magnus mentions a date and alec is immediately like “hell YEAH we should do that” no hesitation like he’s 100% ready to leave immediately right now (i see his pause between “wanna... i don’t know, get a drink?” and “....sometime?”, i see it, you can’t fool me alexander) and also the fact that his first suggestion is something that he hates but that he knows for a fact magnus likes is so cute, like he immediately goes for magnus’ interests here and we stan

i also think that he’s come to associate drinking = dates after 1x06 and the way magnus called him specifically for a drink before he showed up too, like... it’s cute how he immediately came to associate those things because of magnus and just jumps into that because that’s what he knows. he’s so eager and like good for him

magnus’ SMILE when he says that like bro he can see how stoked alec is to go on a date with him they are adorable he is so fucking HAPPY i doubt he expected such a great outcome from this and yet here they are

ALEC DOES THE WHOLE LOOKING AT HIS LIPS IN QUICK SUCCESSION THING ONE LAST TIME BEFORE THE SCENE ENDS SHUT UP OH MY GOD HE NEVER STOPS. MATT DADDARIO THANK YOU FOR MY RIGHTS

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