#honestly does anyone else wonder if someone can read your thoughts in public

[gojonanami]

thinking about mindreader!nanami getting flustered every time he comes to his favorite bakery because the cute baker, that he has a crush on and who always gets him his favorites, has every explicit thoughts when her mind wanders — and soon, she starts to have some not so innocent thoughts about him—

thoughts that keep him up at night — as he touches himself under the covers, and wonders when he will get the courage to ask you out.

[midwestbramble]

Mastering Witchcraft Review

This book has been on my list for a long time now. It was recommended as an older read for those interested in Traditional Witchcraft.

There aren't too many "vintage" books on traditional witchcraft, most of the writings were in a magazine called the Pentagram that is no longer in print or saved in letters between practitioners (some of which you can find online now at the 1734 website). Suffice to say, people have been arguing about what is "true" witchcraft for a long time. Really ever since Gerald Gardner went public with his religion. So I was curious what this book could say since I was told it's a traditional witchcraft book.

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Content:

Synopsis

What I Liked

What I Didn’t Like

Overall Thoughts

Conclusion

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Originally published 1970

"An enduring classic since its publication in 1970, Mastering Witchcraft is one of the best how-to manuals for those wishing to practice traditional European Witchcraft as a craft rather than a New Age religion. Starting from first principles, Huson instructs the novice step by step in the arts of circle casting, blessing and banning, the uses of amulets and talismans, philters, divination, necromancy, waxen images, knots, fascination, conjuration, magical familiars, spells to arouse passion or lust, attain vengeance, and of course, counter-spells to exorcize and annul the malice of others."

- from the back of the book

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What I Liked

I’ve been looking into working with the wind in magic and this book gave an interesting reference for wind coming from the north that I will be looking into. He also talks about gardening by the moon, attempting to make it sound witchier than it is, but it was still nice to see.

Huson did all the illustrations in the book himself and they are quite striking.

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What I Didn't Like

Let’s start at the beginning. All of the history in this book is trash. I’ll assume it’s because the book was published in 1970 and so all his resources are from the 60s or earlier. And boy… was that a time in historical scholarship. He even calls Gerald Gardner an anthropologist, which he was not.

Going off of that is the incredible lack of even an acknowledgement of Kabbalah being Jewish and even using the “Cabbala” spelling. This is a wonderful article if you wish to learn more about that problematic history.

A lot of his information is from ceremonial/Hermetic texts such as Transcendental Magic by Éliphas Lévi which he does not cite or mention and Aleister Crowley (who he gives credit). In this line of thought, any time he talks about working with spirits in this book, he insists on binding them and trapping them. Exerting your will over them and forcing the spirits to do your bidding. Which is a very ceremonial magician kind of relationship that I personally find distasteful. And honestly, as a book meant for beginners, it doesn’t go into enough detail, only showing one specific spirit (Vassago).

He’s also fairly hypocritical in saying a witch can’t break their word or lie because then their spells won’t be powerful but at the same time don’t tell anyone what you’re doing. So if someone comes asking questions… lie?

He claims that a quote from Dune (published in 1965) is an old witch verse. Maybe Frank Herbert knows something I don’t, but I can’t find this quote literally anywhere else. It’s a beautiful verse, it’s just not what he claims it is. He also claims that the Charge of the Goddess is “traditional” but I would say it’s only traditional as in Doreen Valiente wrote it based on “Aradia, Gospel of the Witches” for Gerald Gardners coven.

He uses a lot of prescriptive rules about giving yourself a witch name, who’s allowed to wear what in ritual, how things are made, and general ritual tools that are very Wiccan. Even the consecration method is Wiccan. Almost all of it can be found in Doreen Valientes books. He even has the practitioner create a magic circle in a Wiccan manner. Trad Craft lays a Compass which is for a different purpose than a circle.

He claims that a lot of the spells are traditional but one takes from Hoodoo, another uses the sator square in a very not traditional love spell, and others are just very modern in understanding. There’s also a love spell where he seems to only think about heterosexual couples, despite later being in a relationship with another man for 49 years. Though this could simply be a way to avoid bigotry (he may not have been out at the time of publishing). And while I don’t have any real qualms with love magic in general there was one spell that just made me think “JUST TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER”

The book has a big focus on Wiccan deities and claims any figure associated with witches are the same ones. Again a lot of incorrect history when talking about deities. He really forces them into a box making it seem as though Habondia (for example) should only be called on for healing and Cernunnos only for things that are aggressive. He also tries to force them all into the Persephone and Hades myth at one point.

When it comes to the chapter on protection and counter magic all I could think was “who are you making so mad sir?” Like who is going about their day so mad at you, you need to be constantly on the watch for curses? I’m not saying you shouldn’t protect yourself, just that you don’t need to be that paranoid.

This same section talked about familiars (which I had been excited for) but it had its own issues. Not one was an actual familiar. First it was giving Latin names that came from absolutely no where. Then it tried to tell us that a “totem” animal was a familiar. A totem animal is an animal that indigenous groups believe they descend from or protects them (sometimes both). The way he spoke about it was more like a mascot. He also talked about pets as familiars which… is a big pet peeve of mine. A pet cannot fulfill the role of a familiar. They are physically incapable and as a pet owner YOU are responsible for their safety. Not the other way around. Off my soap box, the last kind he talked about was a servitor. Which I suppose can be close, except they are created to serve a purpose in a way similar to a computer program. A familiar is a spirit with its own consciousness and will who has agreed to work with you in magic. And the next big thing with this section is he doesn’t even tell you how to gain one of these as a “familiar.”

At one point in the cursing section, he calls a poppet a “voodoo doll.” Voodoo practitioners tell me they don’t use them. He also says “magical elements inherent within the West Indian voodoo cult should be incorporated” to “give your coven a more African flavor.” Going on to say “the entities are exactly the same.” No! They’re not! Bad, English man, bad! Loa are not the same as Cernunnos or Aradia. Please for the love of cultural respect do not just start contacting loa without being a voudousant going through the proper channels.

He also talks about binding yourself with a cord to restrict blood flow which is something I’ve only seen when talking about Gardnerian Wiccan practices and it’s off shoots. It came up in the cursing section as well is in the initiations.

He likes to call any practices that aren’t ceremonial primitive, saying “One such primitive example involves the hammering of three iron nails in triangular formation into the north side of a tree, naming the victims name at each blow; I believe this is still practiced in the Ozarks to this day.”

Two last things. The sabbat rituals are all Wiccan not trad craft. He has a recipe for “sabbat oil” to be used before heading out physically to the rituals but it’s all the traditional herbal components to flying ointment, a traditional witchcraft tool for spirit flight.

The lack of in text citations is just the cherry on top for me.

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Overall Thoughts

This was a hard book for me to get through. Much of it was ceremonial magic with a few dashes of trad practices and VERY Wicca leaning. I just disagree with the author on too many subjects and, as a history nerd, there’s too much misinformation. It’s not that these workings wouldn’t work, just the surrounding details that are problematic along with the encouragement of appropriation.

This book confuses Wicca and trad craft. I can’t recommend this book unfortunately, and honestly don’t even feel like people should read it from a cultural literacy stand point. I wish the author well though, as he’s still around.

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Conclusion

I just don’t like when a book is advertised as one thing and then shows a completely different practice, and I always want to be honest about how I feel about a book. You may decide that this book interests you based on the things I didn’t like, you may decide it doesn’t. That’s up to you. Either way, I hope this review helped you in some way.

*All images from the book

[keepthetension]

hehe i'm glad this amused you @enbymoomin

the more i think about how funny this moment was, the more i find myself mentally composing a little spitefic where boston reads them all for filth. it makes me happy to picture this, so it would be nice if the rest of you boston fans in this bar get something out of it too:

the room erupts when mew answers the question; cheum even presses for more gory details. it's great fun, top-tier entertainment, all around! but not for top. the discomfort in his body language is loud enough it practically hurts boston's eardrums, but nobody else notices. not even mew, although that doesn't really surprise boston, truth be told.

or is it that nobody else cares?

and it doesn't even matter, does it? because what are people like top and boston to these people, but public commodities, pieces of meat? not even meat. junk food, penny candy, something to use between proper meals

boston doesn't even realize he's laughing until mew asks, "what's so funny, ton?"

he shakes his head — damn, he has tears in his eyes from how hard he was laughing! it makes the whole room blurry, and that's just fine with him. there's nothing in here he's interested in looking at.

he flashes them his most winning smile. "nothing! just… ten out of ten? fuck, mew, you're underselling it, honestly."

funny how this pronouncement isn't met with gaiety, but then, it's not like boston expected it to be.

he rises to a kneeling position, and counts off on his fingers. "really! listen, guys, it's the length, sure, but also the girth!" he wolf whistles. "goddamn. that's not even counting the technique. and the stamina? he fucks like a machine. and ooh, this man can kiss! hundred out of ten if you ask me. and you all know!" he gestures to his own body, up and down. "if anyone knows good dick, it's a nasty slut like me."

boston applauds and looks at top, making a chef's kiss motion. top is making that caged-in face at him again, but boston doesn't have it in him to feel bad. "i doubt mew even knows how to enjoy it all properly, so when you get sick of jumping through hoops like a prize show dog, come find me in new york. it's a shame i never got photos of you, you know?"

he turns to top's boyfriend, and yeah, that's the look. there's the real mew.

"i said it before, mew, you ought to be thanking me. because you never would have been able to get him to yourself without my help. and more than that"—boston leans forward, pointing directly into mew's sneering face—"i gave you something to hold over his head for the rest of your relationship!" he shrugs. "however long that'll be. but you have all the power now, and that's what you really wanted." he chuckles. "and you know something, mew? honestly? i kinda thought getting a top-tier dicking down would help you loosen the fuck up! make you less of a sanctimonious bitch! but i guess even top's monster cock isn't big enough to dislodge the stick up your ass, huh?"

ray yells and tries to lunge at him, and boston is actually surprised it took him this long. sand holds him back, though, as boston figured he would. "you two should be thanking me too, you know. if i hadn't got mew and top together, you never would have moved the fuck on, ray. and look!" he gestures at sand. "in the process, you got yourself a shiny new mommy to take care of you! exactly what you've always wanted!"

everyone's yelling now. whatever. he gets to his feet.

"you know, i've always wondered, ray? you love to say you think someone like top can never change. what about you? do you think someone like you can change? you really think you're not going to fucking blow this to smithereens? you really think he wants to spend his life looking after you?" boston snorts. "best of luck! at the very least try not to get him killed with your drunk driving, huh?"

there's a lot of shouting, but nobody's saying anything he hasn't heard before. it was kind of disappointing; you'd think they'd have better insults after all this time.

he downs his drink — it was terrible anyway; he deserves better. as a treat. as more of a treat.

"believe me, i'm going," he says, crumpling up the plastic cup and throwing it over his shoulder. "best that way, right, cheum?" he makes a camera shutter with his fingers and pans it around the room. "i was ruining the picture for you, but with me gone, you have the perfect little matched sets of dress up dollies you wanted. that includes you, april; if you think she cares about you as a person, you're even dumber than top."

he'd thought that ending out the year by setting old grievances to rest would be a nice way of saying goodbye to his life here. it's what you were supposed to do, right?

but burning bridges was always more his style. and he doesn't need these people, nor, it dawns on him, does he want them.

boston flips the bird with both hands. "fuck you very much! i hope every last one of you gets exactly what you fucking deserve."

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ooc? too much? sure. did i have fun writing it? YOU BET

if you think of anything else he'd say, drop it in the tags!

funniest person to cut to, i'm laughing my ass off

[redvelvetnat]

Smut with Kate as a daddy??

brain rot

drummer!kate bishop x reader

summary ➞ she’d been looking for you since the first night of her tour, three months is a long time to think about someone.

disclaimer ➞ strong language, alcohol, smut, fingering, public sex, dirty talk (praise + degradation + pet names), daddy kink

a/n ➞ honestly, the fact that she’s specifically a drummer has little to do with the actual story. i’m just a whore. this piece of work is not to be copied or translated anywhere. thank you for reading!!! comments and reblogs appreciated <3 gif source

Kate wondered if you could feel her watching you as she twirled her drumsticks between her fingers. She couldn’t help the staring, watching her bandmate chat you up with that stupid cocky smirk plastered across her face.

She had thought a lot about you since the last time she had seen you. For three months, the flashes of your sweaty escapades was all she had to tie herself over until she could find another pretty thing like you.

That was the problem, she figured. She’d turned down too many of those tight skirt, high-heel, doe-eyed opportunities to convince herself that she’d find anyone that resembled you enough to satisfy her.

She must have looked pathetic; all those nights, raking through the deepest part of her brain for memories of that night with her fingers sunk between her trembling thighs. But what else was she supposed to do with all that built up frustration?

At first, she thought she would only be disappointed by her expectation to see you tonight. Just because she was back in your city didn’t mean you’d care enough to come see her, right?

But here you were; six feet away from her and looking like the angel on Earth that she remembered you to be.

The red solo cup she finally found the courage to offer you was a distraction at best, an ‘I missed you and I want your attention on me’ disguised as the ‘I thought I recognized that pretty face of yours’ that actually came out of her mouth.

And, just like that, everything else melted away until it was only the two of you staring into each other’s eyes.

Most of what came after that was a blur, right up until she found herself with you in an empty hallway; giggling like school children, one of her hands against the wall beside your head and the other wrapped around your waist like she was scared you would disappear out from under her.

She only really snapped back into reality when she could feel your breath against her lips.

It was risky, she knew that, anyone could have stumbled upon the two of you here. But all she could bring herself to care about was keeping you close as she dipped her head down and connected your lips. The taste of you might as well have been the gates of heaven the way she’d been waiting so long for it to greet her.

Her knee slotted between your legs and she found it hard to ignore the whimper that fell into her mouth. The alcohol was strong enough to give her the confidence to slide her hand to the small of your back and guide you to grind against her thigh.

She lifted your chin, your pupils already blown and your irises glinting with the submission she had missed so much. “You want it, peachy?” She teased, teeth sinking into the edge of your jaw as your head fell back against the wall behind you.

The empty nod that followed wasn’t enough for her. She wanted you to beg until your throat burned and your voice went hoarse but this wasn’t really the time or place for that, if she was going to have you now it’d have to be quick.

But she still couldn’t resist from teasing, “You gotta ask for it, baby.” She whispered into your skin and squeezed you between her palms. “Come on, you can do it.”

“Please.” The pout alone could have done her in, the way your thighs tightened around her leg as you looked up at her through your long eyelashes and awaited her next command - she loved that you were so willing.

“Please…?” Honestly she would have settled for anything you wanted to call her, as long as whatever you called her said ‘i’m yours for the night’.

“Please, daddy.”

She might have stopped breathing as the words left your swollen lips, or maybe it just felt that way with the alcohol that burned in her chest. “Who am I to deny such a pretty girl, hmm?”

Her thigh left it’s place against your clit, much to your dismay, she concluded, by the way you whined into the empty space. “I know, honey, just give me a second.”

And it really was only a second before she was pushing your underwear out of the way and sinking her finger into you with little regard for who could find the two of you in such a compromising position.

“You want me to ruin you, honey? Right here where anyone could hear how wet you are - could see the way you shake for me?” The whine that followed was high in your throat and cut off by a gasp as her finger curled inside you. “Been wanting you for so long, and now I’ve got you making a mess all over my fingers. Lucky me.”

Then there was a second finger, followed by a third, and the way your hand gripped at her hair made her dizzy in the best sort of way. “Daddy - oh fuck - please! Give it to me.”

“Don’t you worry, baby. Daddy’s gonna take such good care of her girl.”

[swtki]

Cedric Diggory NSFW Alphabet

Pairing: Cedric Diggory x Fem! Reader

A/N: I’m gonna be working on more headcannon stuff like this, so follow me if you want to see them when they are posted!

WARNINGS: SMUT, ORAL SEX (F RECIEVING), MENTIONS OF PUBLIC SEX, 18+ ONLY

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

I think Ced won’t hesitate to clean his partner up. Just a warm rag and quick wipe. Sometimes Ced will pass out as soon as he hits the mattress, but most times he’ll hold his naked body to yours and talk until you fall asleep. 

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

His favorite part of your body is your lips, for sure. He loves to watch them wrap around things, even when you put his finger into your mouth it drives him mental. His favorite part of himself is hands, he has fairly large hands so everything in them looks small. He loves that when he holds your waist its like his hands were meant to be there. Not to mention his long fingers, one hand can do so many wonders. 

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

I honestly don’t see him as someone who loves anything to do with cum. He would be more than happy to wear a condom while you’re dating, because that way he can make sure you enjoy it without the worries of unprotected sex. I also can see him not wanting to go raw because so many things could go wrong, but if you’re on birth control he will definitely be persuaded to pull out. Once he pulls out the first time he is utterly hooked and loves cumming on your stomach while you lay there on your back, looking all fucked out.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Not to say that Cedric secretly wants to explore public sex, however I am saying every time you two go out hes thinking of railing you in an alley against a brick wall. He loves public affection in a sfw way so I think he would be eager to explore nsfw public stuff. Now this all being said, he doesn’t ask you for a long time though, until you’re walking home from the shops and he starts to kiss you because god you look so gorgeous in the soft lighting, and then the kiss gets more intense. Then, he basically says fuck it and asks you if he can eat you out on the wall.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Like I said in Cedrics headcannon post, I doubt he lost his virginity with anyone other than Cho when they were maddly in love. When he meets you he wants to be nothing less than perfect. When things started to get serious in your relationship he swallowed his pride and looked up sex tips because he was worried he wasn’t experienced enough. 

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Cowgirl. No doubt about it. He loves how accessible it is for you, he can rub your clit, he can be chest to chest and thrust into you, he can be hypnotized by your perfect tits, it has everything. 

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

Theres times where he kills the moment because he makes a joke in between thrusts, but more often than not hes got his head in the game. It will always start of playful and innocent with Cedric, but as soon as hands start roaming, he gets focused on the task at hand.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He isn’t shaven, but tidy for sure. Just a nice little bit at the base and he’s groomed. 

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Cedric loves nothing more than to brush the hair out of your face and stare into your eyes while your blissed out. Also he loves kissing and touching even before clothes come off. 

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

I can see Cedric having a pretty high sex drive and sometimes you have to tap out for the night because your body can only take so much, so he’ll for sure be rubbing one out in the bathroom as soon as you fall asleep. He doesn’t mind of course, he’d rather you be comfortable even if that means he has to jerk off in the shower to the memory of twenty minutes prior.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

I thoroughly believe that Cedric Diggory has a praise kink. He loves nothing more than growling “So fucking perfect, my perfect fucking girl” into your ear during sex. I also think he has a roleplay kink, because you dressed up as a nurse for halloween and he was in another dimension.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

As I said previously, Cedric likes the idea of walls. However, I think he much prefers the bed or floor of your room. It just feels like you two are the only ones in the world and he cant deny how much of an angel you look like while surrounded by his soft white sheets. He would settle for a car, but your home is much better.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

Kissing is his number one movement to start things off, so I think just kissing him would make him ready to go. I can see him having a thing for lip biting, especially when you’re reading or doing some other innocent task.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

If its something you don’t like, he won’t ever do it. He draws the line at bodily injury and excretory body fluids, Cedrics not hardcore like that. Wouldn’t mind choking you but he could never slap you or hurt you in any other way.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Cedric prefers giving, he feels bad because he takes so long to finish so he always leaves it up to you. He is an absolute got at eating coochie though, he pays attention to what you do and don’t like. And he would honestly eat you out anywhere. Like sometimes he just drops to his knees and hikes your leg up. His eyes when he looks up at you tho....fuck.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

Definitely depends on the moment but I think most of the time he’s sensual and slow. He wants the world to stop and for it to only be your bodies moving in sync with each other, and especially so he can look into your eyes while he gets you closer and closer to orgasm.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

Loves the whole rose petal romantic 2 hour long sex thing but will rip off your underwear in a closet to eat you out if he can.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

He only takes risks by asking about something. He would always get your consent before anything else happens, so he knows worst you could do is say no. That being said, if you ask him 97% of the time he’s on board. Public sex took some convincing but he was in love with it.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

I just think he’s ready to eat pussy 24/7 despite how hard he is. He’s horny all the time (in spirit if not physically) so I think he would go for multiple rounds. Though he will eventually get tired in one position, so you end up switching through 50 different positions in the span of the hour.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

The only toys Cedric uses on his partner are handcuffs at most. He prefers to use his skill because after all, he’s the one who should be making you feel that good.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Cedric isn’t the tease, you are. He wants you but simply can’t take you from behind during potions class, so he rests his hand on your thigh. He secretly loves how cocky you get, and secretly you love how turned on he is from your legs.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

Listen to me: breathy moans. He’ll get so close to your ear and start whisper-moaning the most risque words. But, volume wise he’s quiet and he prefers it that way. He never wants to drown out the pretty mewls you make because of his fingers and cock.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

He eats pussy that way iykyk. I’m glad every fic writer agrees that Ced is a pussy conesiour, because he loves grabbing your hips and pulling you down closer on his tongue, thats non negotiable. He probably has the strongest tongue in the world.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

He thought he was small until he met you and was like “Sorry, I’m not that impressive 😔” then pulled out 6 inches of cervix shattering dick. Its thick too, but not like the porn-type thick, like it fits in your hand comfortably and fills you up perfectly.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

Like I said: Always horny. Every time he watches you bite your lip he’s got a million things he wants to do to you in a broom closet.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He would rather watch you fall asleep even if that meant he never slept. But once he knows you’re sleeping, he wraps his body around yours with his chin on your shoulder and falls asleep. Prefect rooms= naked naps.

Taglist: @annasdani @mullthingsoverinthehotwater @faeinorbit @anchoeritic @cedricsyellowscarf

[mimzy-writing-online]

Hello. I had a question regarding your post about blind characters. I have a character in my WIP that must cover their eyes.. but it’s blind. He may need to tell people he is blind to explain why he covers his eyes though. I was wondering how I might write this character without offending. Thank you :)

I think I want to start by explaining the “covering blind eyes” trope and why it has become a harmful trope. I think understanding why it’s hurtful helps everyone learn how to handle it better.

I would guess that the “blind people wear sunglasses” trope comes from Hollywood for the specific reason of 1. wanting to signal to the audience that the character is obviously blind and 2. avoid breaking the suspension of disbelief by preventing the audience from catching the sighted actor look at visual stimuli (because disabled characters are almost always played by able actors).

But this changed the way the public expects to experience blindness. If watching a sighted actor wear sunglasses and say he’s blind is all the exposure to the blind community a person has had, that’s the only model of blindness they’ll recognize. If they meet a blind person in real life who doesn’t wear sunglasses, it’s going to break this built perception and cause an uncomfortable cognitive dissonance. 

And then there is the common “cloudy-white blank gaze” that pops up in media. It stems from the fact that cataracts is the most common cause of blindness and the appearance of severe cataracts is a cloudy film in the eyes obscuring the iris and pupil. It can also alter what color a person’s eyes appears to be, making them appear paler and grey in the beginning and then as the cataract advances it becomes more yellow/brown and alters a person’s vision to appear more yellow tinted.

There are lots of other eye conditions that makes the eyes look visibly different. Albinism for instance affects the color and structure of the iris. Eyes might be congenitally misshapen. The muscles might be weak or not work and one or both eyes point significantly outward. Someone who was born blind and experienced no visual stimuli might also have weak muscles around their eyes because they never had a reason to focus their eyes on anything.

And unfortunately humans have the habit of feeling uncomfortable when they meet someone who looks very obviously different from the norm, whether that’s a personal style choice (hair color and style, tattoos, clothing choices) or something they can’t help (a visible disability, skin color, scars). 

To the paragraph above, @gothhabiba replied with:  “it's very weird & ahistorical to claim that racism or ableism are some kind of natural "human" trait.. like frankly it's apologia”

You’re right, I wasn’t thinking beyond that generalization or assumption.

Perhaps a better way to put it is: I was raised in a society where I was taught from childhood to think that there was only one kind of human being to be. White, cis, straight, abled, conservative. That’s a very western thing and that’s a thing I’m going to constantly be unlearning.

Racism and ableism and homophobia aren’t innate, that’s a western thing that was forced onto the rest of the world by colonialism. And because western media created this idea that the world is white, abled, cis, straight, and Christian-value leaning, it taught people to think that was the norm so that seeing someone different from that archetype would cause a cognitive dissonance, which causes discomfort.

And instead of working past that cognitive dissonance to learn more and realize there’s so much more to life than media taught you, society encourages you to ignore that cognitive dissonance by sticking your head in the sand-- or TV screen.

So combine these two tropes or common beliefs together and you get something a little dangerous: the idea that blind people cover their eyes because they look obviously different and they’re ashamed (or should be ashamed) of that.

And if you’re someone who’s just gone blind or who was born blind and you have little to no contact with the blind community, then this societal belief that you should be ashamed of how your eyes look becomes detrimental to your self-esteem and further builds internalized ableism.

I’ve lost count of the times I’ve read or watched a blind character cover their eyes with sunglasses because they were ashamed of how their eyes looked. And I distinctly remember a few times where a sighted friend of the character was trying to convince them to stop wearing sunglasses because there’s nothing wrong with looking different--which is true, but it plays into this fantasy of being the perfect abled ally who saves the blind character from being miserable. 

In an ideal world, the character has no reason to believe looking different is a bad thing or diminishes their worth or makes people dislike them. And if they develop this belief, it’s more likely that someone more involved in the disabled community, most likely someone disabled themselves, will set them straight. Or that the character will learn to accept themselves on their own, looks included.

But there are some perfectly valid reasons for any blind person to wear sunglasses. They might have an interest in fashion and sunglasses complete the look they’re going for. They could want to protect their eyes from UV rays while they’re outside. They may experience light sensitivity and sunglasses reduces any discomfort or pain. Those are incredibly common reasons to wear sunglasses whether you’re sighted or blind.

But there are some more complicated situations.

In your words, your character must cover his eyes. You never specified why, so my primary guess is that he has some kind of power that is unpleasant or has devastating affects and the only way to prevent it is to keep his eyes covered. My primary guess stems from this post where an anon and I discussed a retelling of Medusa, a hypothetical blinding of oneself to avoid ever killing anyone ever again, and what I think I would do if I was in that scenario.

So how do you write a blind character who must cover their eyes and avoid some of the complications?

1. Your character must always have the ability to say “fuck off, it’s my business, I don’t have to tell you why I’m blind or why I cover my eyes.”

Most blind people really, really don’t want to get into the nitty-gritty of why they’re blind and how they feel about it and what it’s like being blind with a stranger they’ll never see again or a new acquaintance they don’t know well yet. You have exceptions to that rule where sure, educating the public about blindness is a thing you want to do and you’re committed to helping your community, but I still have days where I don’t want to talk about being blind or disclose my medical crap.

And if someone doesn’t respect their right to their privacy or pushes too much, the blind character is allowed to be angry, is allowed to tell them off and complain without anyone else in the situation vilifying them or saying they’re “overreacting” and “should have just disclosed private information because big deal or whatever.” If they are angry, that’s their right, and it’s not unreasonable, it doesn’t make them a bad person.

2. Your character should not be ashamed of being blind or of covering their eyes. It is a part of their life, they’re used to it by now, even if they weren’t in the beginning.

The shame and internalized ableism is something that should be written about, but that’s for an own-voices story with a blind author. I don’t think an abled person will ever be able to understand how much society expects you to hate yourself and your disability because “being disabled is a tragic thing that ruins your life” and how that does affect your mental health, self esteem, your relationships with others, your medical care, and what kind of accommodations you can get.

3. It wouldn’t hurt to have a few sarcastic lines in response to uncomfortable conversations.

Stranger: so what’s with the...

Blind Character: what’s with what?

S: the... you know

BC: you’re gonna have to be a bit more specific

S: Your eyes?

BC: They’re... eyes

S: but you’re...

BC: Blind?

S: uh...

BC: yeah, I’m blind. *walks away*

Or this conversation:

S: *to some other character* so why are his eyes covered?

(author’s note: which, honestly, that’s fucking rude. At least have the guts to ask me yourself)

BC: If I look anyone in the eye they instantly perish.

*awkward silence*

BC: instantly.

Friend: It’s truly tragic

BC: *melancholic* that’s how I lost my sister. *chokes up* She was so young

Or this conversation:

S: Why are you wearing that?

BC: It’s called fashion Karen!

Or this conversation:

S: are you like... blind?

BC: yes?? why wouldn’t I be?? Wait, are you sighted? Are you one of those sighted people? You poor thing! What caused you to gain your sight? Do you have a car? A bike? Were you born sighted? What’s it like to see color? Do you miss not having to see 

God, I want a chance to try that last one. I haven’t interacted with a stranger in almost a year. One day...

4. Honestly, it’d also be cool if someone’s reaction to your character covering their eyes was like, “cool sunglasses,” or “cool *insert random character, even one you made up* cosplay,” (which is ten times funnier if this character is a notable figure in modern society like an actor who people might cosplay). 

5. You know, if he’s covering his eyes with some kind of blindfold, he should totally have custom blindfolds for his moods. Like, I have a mask that says “suck it up buttercup” and another that says “not today” because sometimes that’s the mood. And sometimes the mood is one of my floral masks, and sometimes the mood is my cat mask.

So, just some thoughts. I hope that helps.

Edit: a commenter said: “op, unless i'm mistaken this kind of reads like anon meant the character ISN'T blind but lies about being blind to explain covering their eyes? it seems like they made a typo on the word "isn't"”

So my original response to the question was based on the assumption that the character is blind. However,

If the character is not blind, then do not under any circumstances have them lie and say they’re blind to escape a mild inconvenience. 

It’s better to have the character actually explain the situation or straight up leave the conversation or invent a more ridiculous lie than to perpetuate the very real stereotype and misconception that there are people who fake being blind and therefore it’s okay to discriminate or harass them if you even suspect they’re faking.

Do not under any circumstances perpetuate that stereotype. Do not harass someone because you don’t think they’re blind enough.

[antiloreolympus]

9 Anti LO Asks

1. ok so, persephone is magically ok after all of ONE therapy session, something people wanted to see for years, meanwhile the trial no one asked for is being dragged into its third month of publishing?? who asked for this??

2. I hate the typos too but why are people pissed at RS specifically for the typos? Isn't spelling a big issue for dyslexic people? Doesn't the fact that she has a whole team behind her mean that someone else is likely in charge of typography? So shouldn't the annoyance be redirected at someone else?

3. RS may be the creator of LO but so many people work on it! Instead of wondering where the editor/typographer fucked off to, anons keep blaming the disabled creator for being unable to catch the errors induced by said disability. What a real class act! When did the anons contributing to this blog go from giving earnest critique to lambasting everything RS does?

From OP about #2 and #3: If you’re both referring to the same asks (the two previous ones about typos), neither of them solely put the blame on RS. They even said that someone on her team should’ve been looking out for these typos. Especially since she (or webtoon) is paying someone to do that.

4. isnt this comic supposed to be about these two characters getting together? why does it seem 90+% of the actual comic is doing everything BUT develop the relationship and getting them together? how is that fun to read?

5. 179 was so bad even tho I wish it came sooner just to get the plot rolling. Regardless of how Thetis feels about Minthe, anyone could have come to the conclusion persphone cursed Minthe into a plant because she wanted hades. Was their fight public? Yeah but no other staff meme we other than Hecate touched base on it and didn’t care, so Thetis didn’t know. And she’s right to say how “unhinged persphone” you’re claiming someone isn’t dead but you haven’t broken the curse nor have you tried at all because your were too busy shopping and showing hades your clone family.

And I know it’s a joke that Zeus doesn’t remember Minthes name, but it does no favors for the plot I feel. It just makes hades looks like a bad bf if he couldn’t get his brother to remember her name, espically since they he told them he was gonna marry her.  Or you know since she’s the other person who whistle blew on persphone.

Can we all just look at the panel where persphone is hiding behind hades like a kid? I’m suppose to root for that? That’s not the dread queen I was expecting. Also why is RS sexualizing Persphone to water a plant in Hades house? That’s a bit much. Zeus didn’t even do much when Persphone said “eventually” she can turn her back, like that’s not a sure answer. Honestly that should have been used more against persphone. Like we thought Minthe was bad? What about the the plant cursing rich kid whose in trial for murder?

“This could have been an email” way to try and make a joke RS about a guy who lost his gf and rethinking his life choices in the most joke of a court. Honestly I feel like if Thanatos emailed HR that Persphone was receiving special treatment, they would blow it off since hades is a king who does what he wants which would only lead to more frustration and probably stil lead to the trial.

Hades “I need better security”, yeah too bad your security was turned into a plant.

Last thing, I know the ledger thing about overthrowing hades was probably written in by someone else, but the reaction of Persphone just makes me think she does have an actual plan to overthrow him. Or maybe it’s about bringing those nameless nymphs back to life. 

6. You guys HAVE to read NPR’s review of the first LO book because it’s insane. It literally says it’s a GOOD thing the women are drawn as male fantasies and look straight out of Playboy, thinks it’s good it has no actual connections to the myths, thinks Rachel is honestly trying to have a commentary on modern day norms (literally where), and only has one passing line mentioning Persephone is roofied (not mentioning it’s by Eros) and to “steer clear if you don’t like discussions of sexual assault” at the last paragraph, not mentioning (or realizing?) it’s only there to push the romance along and to technically not make her a virgin. It doesn’t even mention the gross nature of the virginity scholarship, the specialization of Persephone at every turn, or how Persephone really has no say in the narrative. I think the writer is trying to hype it up since it’s women-made comic, but holy shit were they stretching it thin in trying to make it something feminism and deeper than a puddle on a light rainy day.

I have to wonder if this is only because it’s the first 25 chapters which genuinely seemed to have some thought and effort put into it, because I can’t imagine the reviewer looking at LO in it’s entirety would hold these same opinions. 

-----FP Spoilers/Mention-----

7. (Fp spoilers)

Holy shit, but the recent fp was a fucking mess. First off, Demeter and Persephone arguing again 🤦‍♀️ I also like how Demeter was being honest and saying she cares and puts Persephone safety first, ONLY FOR PERSEPHONE TO SAY BULLSHIT AND THEN SAY HE LOVES HADES OOF.

Than idk the conversation between Apollo and Hephaestus made me super uncomfortable like ugh, then hades coming in and then saying to Persephone he knows Apollo hurt her and wants to know. Ugh, like why can’t Persephone tell her story instead of somebody either saying it or putting crumbs into it.

Idk this chapter was a messy one to me. 

8. FP Spoiler

.

.

P confronts her mom because she made Hades forget about her, claiming she felt like she made a genuine conection with him, just to feel alone when Hades didn't come back or something and like girl you just talked for 5 minutes top with a stranger OMG calm down control your hormones

From OP: Plus, Hades was drunk. It’d be different if he was completely sober but he wasn’t.

9. Fast pass preview looks terrifying and everyone is thinking that Persephone tells him what happened to her and or he found out yet the image looks frightening… how is everyone cheering for this hypocrite of a man?!! THIS IS MORE TERRIFYING THAN THE UGLY ASS PIN 

[haikyuuthots]

Hi I love your fics. I read all your ushijima ones and I loved them ☺️ Is there any way you can write some ushijima angst please??? Thank you I hope you have a great day 💖

Misunderstanding- Wakatoshi Ushijima

Pairing: reader x Ushijima

Word count: 1.8K

Warnings: curse words, some arguing, angst.

Synopsis: your boyfriend overhears you talking to your friend, and is offended by what you said. You had no idea why he was giving you the silent treatment.

A/n: here ya go bestie, I’m sorry it’s a little late, I’ve been working :/ thank u luv and appreciate u 🤍

MASTERLIST

————————————————————————-

Being with Ushijima was a literal dream. Although he almost always held a stoic expression and wasn’t into public demonstration of affection. There was no doubt that Ushijima loved you, and was only ever soft with you.

From another persons perspective, Ushijima could seem uninterested or inexpressive, but to you Ushijimas feeling were the most evident, you never had to question what he could be thinking or feeling. But one day, everything felt off, for the first time , you had no idea what was on his mind.

Ushijima was home early from practice that day. You didn’t notice him walk in because you were on FaceTime with your friend. Last night all three of you went to dinner and you two were talking about the experience. Ushijima can hear you’re on the phone so as he’s making his way to your shared bedroom he walks around quietly not wanting to disturb you from the call. Stopping at the crack of the door, he can’t help but overhear the conversation between you and your friend.

“Yeah he just doesn’t really know how to express himself, sorry if it felt a little awkward.”

Your friend lets out a small laugh “no girl you’re good, it’s funny he’s kinda like a brick wall.”

Ushijima’s chest tightens upon hearing this comment from your friend, becoming a bit offended.

You on the other hand laugh out loud at her comment, you found it kind of funny. This offends your boyfriend even more he expected you’d at least try to defend him but instead you continued to agree.

“He kinda is.” You chuckle out “it’s like he’s like this the whole time.” You finish your sentence by changing your posture to stand completely still, with no expression on your face. Doing your best to “imitate” him. Your friend bursts into a fit of laughter and you briefly join her.

Ushijima has heard enough at this point, becoming angered by the fact that you would ver talk about him behind his back negatively. With a scowl on his face and a hurt heart he angrily makes his way out.

You on the other hand are still unaware that he was ever present at all, and continue talking

“No I'm just kidding. Honestly, he’s actually a big softie believe it or not. He cares about me and always makes sure to show me he does. He’s literally the sweetest person on the planet. Foreal girl I’m down bad.” You chuckle “I love him so much, I couldn’t ask for anyone better.” Your friend gives you a sincere smile as she hears you gush about your boyfriend “I can tell. Honestly he does seem like a really great guy. I’m so happy for you.”

As you continue to listen to her speak, you’re suddenly startled by a sound coming from your living room. You go to look to see what it is but you find nothing. You shrug it off and continue with the call.

Unbeknownst to you though, your boyfriend had actually been there and just left again, closing the front door of the house. He had no idea what to do with this built up anger growing inside him so he decided to go with his best friend Tendou to avoid you until he calmed down. Overhearing you say those words, really did hurt his feelings, and it made him insecure.

You continued on the call for another 20 minutes before you ended it

“Okay so I’m gonna go, it’s almost 9 so Ushijima should be home soon.” You tell your friend.

You both say your final goodbyes and hang up. Now you were jut waiting for your boyfriends arrival.

It was almost midnight and your boyfriend had still not returned home. You were worried sick, calling and texting him every 30 minutes. But he never answered any of them. You were freaking out, debating whether or not you should go look for him. When you finally came to a decision you heard the front door open and saw your boyfriend walk right through it.

You let out a giant sigh of relief, as you run over to him

“Oh my god Toshi, where have you been?!” You say as you make your way over to hug him.

He doesn’t answer or reciprocate the hug, confused you pull away

“Do you know how worried I was?! I thought something happened to you.” You say, annoyance obvious in your tone

Ushijimas stoic expression never changes as he stares down at you, still not muttering a word he continues to walk in shoving you to the side.

You’re extremely confused by this behavior. Ushijima never ignored you and he never ever went somewhere without letting you know first. Everything he did was out of character, and the fact that he ignored all your questions and avoided you completely angered you. You quickly follow him back to your shared bedroom, raising your voice you speak again

“Why are you ignoring me? Where the hell were you? Why didn’t you answer any of my messages?”

He still doesn’t say a word and this pisses you off even more. You forcefully turn him around to face you, your hand gripping on his arm “I’m talking to you” you angrily say

Instantly Ushijima yanks his arm away from your grip “don’t touch me y/n” the seriousness in his voice is almost scary.

You’re taken aback by his actions, you had no idea what was wrong with him. Why was he being so cold to you? He has never once acted this hostile towards you, you couldn’t wrap your head around what could’ve been wrong.

“A-are you mad at me or something?” You stutter out,

Still your boyfriend says no words, proceeding to grab a blanket and pillow,

“I’m sleeping in the guest room tonight. Don’t follow me.” He states as he briefly looks behind him to look at you one last time before walking out.

You felt defeated, the tears you were desperately trying to hold back, finally making their way out. You felt heartbroken, that your boyfriend whom you loved very much wanted nothing to do with you, and you had no idea why.

You cried yourself to sleep that night, overthinking and wondering why Ushijima had such a giant shift in character.

For the next two days, you barely spoke to your boyfriend. You missed him, and not being able to speak to him hurt you very much. All you wanted to do was talk to him and work things out, but he didn’t seem to want to do the same, considering the fact that every time you directed a word to him, he’d only stare blankly and ignore you.

Now, you’ve had enough, you weren’t going to take this torture anymore, if he wanted to give you the silent treatment, you needed to know why.

It was 9:30 pm when he walked through the front door returning from practice. You wasted no time and instantly made your way over to him

“We need to talk.” No answer

You groan “fuck Ushijima it’s been two days, can you please just talk to me?”

“Why are you mad at me, what did I do??” You’re voice is sounding more desperate now. But he just continues to make his way to the closet.

“Talk to me!!! Im tired of this, it feels like I’m talking to a fucking wall.” You yell out.

This comment seems to trigger Ushijima, as it finally incites a response from him

“If that’s how you feel then maybe you should just leave!” His voice is louder than you’ve ever heard it before

He’s staring at you with a hurt gaze, “if you’ve always felt like I’m such a wall then why are you even with me?”

You’re shocked at his sudden outburst, feeling hurt by his words

“Is that what you want?” You quietly let out, “you want us to break up?”

You’re trying your best to hold back tears “but why!?”

“This is what YOU want. You made that pretty obvious.”

You’re beyond confused “what are you even talking about, why would I want this??”

“I know I bore you y/n! You don’t have to pretend to spare my feelings anymore.”

“W-what? Where did you get that from? Why would you say that?”

At this point the tears you were holding back are spilling out Ushijima’s gaze softens as he notices, his voice calming down a bit. He didn’t care how hurt he felt, the last thing he wanted to do was watch you cry.

“I heard you that night. You were talking to y/f/n. And I heard how you feel like I’m a brick wall with no expression.”

You’re staring at him in shock, you had no idea Ushijima had even been there that night.

“Toshi. I was only joking I swear. Instanly right after I ranted about how much you actually aren’t a brick wall, and how much I love you.” You place your hand on his cheek, making him look down at you. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings. I promise I don’t feel that way at all.”

Ushijima melts in your touch, listening to your apologies, “i overreacted. Yes you hurt my feelings a bit but I should’ve talked to you about it.”

You make your way to hug him, and for the first time in two days he finally holds you into the embrace “no toshi. I made a dumb joke, and you didn’t listen to the entire context so it was easy to misunderstand. It’s not your fault, you had every right to be upset.”

He’s squeezing you, slowly rubbing his hands on your back, as a form of comfort

“It’s just, I know I’m not the most expressive, so when I heard you say that, I couldn’t help but feel that you were right. All I could think about was how much better you’d be with someone who matched your energy.”

You pull away and you look up at him “stop, don’t say that. I don’t need anyone else but you. You’re everything I want, I wouldn’t change a thing about you. I love you for you Toshi.”

You bury your face into his chest, tears beginning to fall from your face again, “I can’t believe I made you feel that way I’m so sorry.”

Ushijima holds you closer, his heart breaking at the sight of you crying again “please stop crying y/n. I don’t like seeing you like this.”

He held your chin up, his big hand wiping away your remaining tears. With a loving gaze he speaks again,

“I love you too y/n.” Instantly he bends down to connect his lips onto yours. He was so gentle as he kissed you, you instanly reciprocated, wrapping your arms around his neck as he held you tighter by the waist.

You missed being this close with your boyfriend, all you’ve wanted for the last two days was to be like this with him.

As you pull away, you speak again “promise me you’ll talk to me next time. Any problem you have please tell me, it hurt too much being away from you.”

“I will” he responds, leaning in for another kiss.

You loved your boyfriend, you truly didn’t want anyone but him.

[enasallavellan]

About Yesterday's Events

So, as some of you may know, I got put on a block list.

FIRST OF ALL, I would like to thank everyone for the outpouring of love and support I received yesterday. I spent the morning crying, shaking, and having panic attacks - I've never been accused of any of these things before and to be publically accused was earthshattering. However, many people reached out to me in messaging, liked and reblogged my stories, and made kind comments - I was completely floored.

So for those kind people and those choosing not to participate in the silliness of this - thank you. It means more than I can say and I'm sending you all love from my whole heart.

Moving on to the new chapter of The Mess™.

Now, I really went back and forth publishing this. But in the end, I'm already in it so I might as well speak my piece.

From what I’ve gathered, it’s the same group that caused issues in The Mess™ a few years ago. I was reading up on it and noticed the banned list. Thought to myself, huh, wonder who's getting dragged through the mud this time around. So I clicked and lo-and-behold.

So, I've blanked out names just to avoid anyone who might not want their username shown.

Anyway.

I'm pissed.

Because never have I been told I'm doing or writing anything inappropriate.

Never has anyone reached out and told me who or what I'm 'supporting' that's so damn awful.

So, since I seem to be under the category of 'supporting' people. It would appear that would be me.

And what does supporting mean? Did I like a drawing? A drabble? Did I reach out when someone was being dragged through the mud in The Mess and give them comfort?

Imma 'bout to go on a tangent, so everything else is under the cut.

Now, I'm not familiar with everyone on their list, and the ones that I am familiar with I haven't looked at every post they did. But the ones I do support, I have never noticed anything like this in posts I've seen. And in all honestly, few names on this list even were given concrete reasons of why they were on there, much less any form of proof of the absolutely disgusting accusations made therein.

But you might say:

Lacy! This is someone’s personal opinion, they don’t know you an explanation!

False.

They do.

But not just me. Every single person on this list has the right to know why they’re on it. Every. Single. One.

The list isn't long. It isn't hundreds of hundreds of people - which is kind of funny if you think about it. THat some of these big names - who are apparently supervillains - only have so few supporters to put on the list.

So yeah. I'm calling bullshit on the category of those 'supporting' the other people. B because they got WAY more people like their stuff and sending them well-wishes during the previous renditions of The Mess.

So I wonder what the real reason is.

Back on topic. Why is this list so bad if it was only meant for 'your' eyes?

Because by making up the list and showing it to people, telling them to trust you and block these people, you made it public.

And you know what? Apparently, the people you want to follow this list don’t deserve real reasons either. Vague ‘they support’ or no reasons at all, along with giant umbrella terms shows that you don’t have evidence. What you claim to be true is not necessarily true. That you likely just have a personal vendetta against certain people for some reason.

It’s pathetic. And it’s the finest example of cowardice I’ve seen since for some long time - especially in apparent adults.

You have smeared our names. You have placed us on a ‘naughty list’ without telling most of us why we’re there. And I don’t think anyone’s going to attempt to give anyone the proof of their apparent evilness that they deserve.

I did reach out to @almosinnia to ask them to let me know why I'm on the list or to point me in the direction of someone who would be willing to talk to me. They had sent some messages to at least two people asking them to remove the post. If I've unintentionally done something to truly earn my place on this list, I want to know. I want to learn from my mistakes and fix things. I would engage in any sort of that behavior on purpose.

But radio silence, despite the 'active in the past two hours' green dot if betrayal having been on most of the day and a solid 24hours to respond. After I checked again after work, their account is unavailable to me. Either my three messages made them block me or the account has been deactivated.

I also wanted to contact @dreamfall since they have been shown to be one of the responsible parties for this list, but they require that they follow you in order to receive messages.

So.

Any of you involved with the making of this silly list, drop me a DM and point me in the direction of one of the leaders I can talk to.

We're not in middle school anymore. We're adults, far past the age of passing notes about which people have cooties and giggling about it.

-Lacy

[milgrammer]

[ENG] Love is mine Voice Drama

Mahiru: [humming]

Es: [footsteps]

Mahiru: I wonder when the prison guard will arrive… 

Es: [enters] Sorry for making you wait, prisoner number 6, Mahiru. 

Mahiru: Ah, no. It’s okay. I only just got here. 

Es: What?

Mahiru: [giggles] Just then, it felt like I was waiting for my date to arrive. Kinda made my heart flutter. 

Es: I’m not exactly one to talk, but… I’m surprised that you can say such a thing despite being in this prison.

Mahiru: Really~? But, this unfamiliar setting makes things super romantic, you know? Thanks to it, every day has been such a delight.

Es: [sighs] What a carefree spirit you are. 

Mahiru: Ah! I get that a lot.

Es: Do you fully understand the situation you’re in, Mahiru? You’re a prisoner who’s killed someone. You weren’t brought here to have fun.

Mahiru: Killed someone… I guess I did… I can’t really deny it, can I? 

Es: With that being said, from on, I shall be conducting this interrogation with the purpose of revealing your sins. This sort of situation is anything, but romantic.

Mahiru: Sin… My sin… I guess so. 

Es: Milgram exists to reveal the sins of you, prisoners, and to hand down the appropriate judgement. So, for that reason, talk to me for a bit. 

Mahiru: Talk? Yay, let’s talk! Let’s talk! Prison guard, are you interested in me? That makes me so happy!

Es: Hmph. Trying to get me to go off track like that is futile. All of you prisoners do the exact same thing… Can't believe I always fall for it.

Mahiru: What are you muttering to yourself about?

Es: Nothing. [clears throat] I shall begin the interrogation now. Let’s see. First off— 

Mahiru: I’ll start! I’m Mahiru Shina, 22 years old. I might not be much good at anything, but please be kind to me.

Es: I’ll be the one asking the questions here! Ugh, no. I know exactly what’ll happen after that from Yuno’s interrogation. It’ll be okay. Just gotta calm down. 

Mahiru: Right. Now it’s your turn, prison guard.

Es: What?

Mahiru: What’s your name? Your age?

Es: [hesitates]

Mahiru: What’s your name? Your age?

Es: It’s Es. As for my age, I’m… 15, I think. 

Mahiru: 15 years old! And, you’re a prison guard at that age, are you? Despite being so young, you’re so admirable. If anything’s troubling you, you can talk it over with ‘big sis’ here, okay? 

Es: Hey, Mahiru. Why do I have to answer— 

Mahiru: Hey, hey! Is Es your real name? Could it be that you’re not Japanese? Don't you have a surname or anything? 

Es: I-I don’t know. It doesn’t matter. I’m Es. I don’t know anything other than that, and I don’t need to either.  

Mahiru: What? You mean you have amnesia? Oh, you poor thing. Are sure you’re not curious about it? About yourself, I mean.

Es: Not a bit. I just tackle the work I have at hand. Sparing myself of any unnecessary information helps me concentrate better.

Mahiru: Huh? But, I’m so curious about you, prison guard. Come on, let’s do it! Let’s get to know more about you, prison guard.

Es: Get to know… about me?

[piercing sound]

Mahiru: Prison guard? What’s wrong?

Es: [hesitates]

Mahiru: Hey… Prison guard?

Es: Oh… yeah. Uh… I apologise for that. 

Mahiru: Did you zone out just then? This job must be pretty difficult, so you might be mentally burned out from work. Herbal tea’s good for that, you know? Oh! Like ginkgo tea—they say it helps improve brain function. 

Es: Oh, is that so? I’ll try a bit then… I mean, no! Enough about me. We’re in the middle of an interrogation at the moment.

Mahiru: Aw, what? But, it was just getting fun.

Es: I mean, why are you asking me questions anyway? Know your place here. 

Mahiru: But… But, you know, prison guard… I think having a mutual understanding of each other is pretty important. Prison guard, you want to know more about me, right?

Es: Well… Something like that.

Mahiru: That makes me so happy! Ah… No, that’s not what I was meant to say… In order for you to do that, getting to know each other would be the first step. Don’t you think? If I get to know lots about you, prison guard, then there will be more things I want to talk to you about. 

Es: Hm. That’s true. I guess that sort of approach might be quite effective on some people. 

Mahiru: Exactly! So, first things first, you should gather up all your courage and be completely transparent about yourself. Doing so will make your partner feel at ease, and they’ll start opening up about themselves more. 

Es: Is that so? ‘Self-disclosure reciprocity’ as we call it then? But, well…  Isn’t this quite the surprise? I didn’t expect you to be so well-versed on matters related to the human psyche.

Mahiru: Huh? S-self-disclosure reciprocity?

Es: In order to gain a deeper understanding of you, prisoners, I was trying to add whatever I could to my stock of knowledge. It was mentioned in one of the publications I read during that time. 

Mahiru: Really~? Prison guard, you’ve read it too? I’ve also read that one. That issue titled 1000 Kanto Girls’ Views on Love was so good, wasn’t it?

Es: [hesitates] What on earth is that?

Mahiru: What? So, you haven’t read it? Lain’s (1) special collection of romantic techniques!

Es: Lain? 

Mahiru: Yeah! Lain. It’s my favourite thing to read. “Fashion, trends, fortune-telling. This special collection on romance has articles about everything. If you wanna make yourself sparkle even more... Then, this women's magazine will help you get there!” 

Es: [sighs] So, it was all just a misunderstanding. Ignore what I said earlier then. 

Mahiru: Oh, that’s right! Prison guard, are you interested in romance at all? I wanna talk about it with you. You’re 15, aren’t you? Right in the heat of adolescence! Do you have anyone you like?  

Es: I honestly have no interest in those matters. 

Mahiru: What? No, no. There’s no such thing as that. Being in love is like a landmine. It'll explode someday, you know? The only thing that differs is whether it happens earlier or later in life. It’ll happen to you too. Even if you don’t have any interest in it now, one day it’ll explode for you as well. All because you’ll have that fateful encounter with your special someone.

Es: You sure do run your mouth a lot, don't you?

Mahiru: Yeah, yeah. You’ll deny it at first. I mean, I was like that as well. Before then, I always admired soap operas and shoujo manga because I thought that they depicted a world different from our own. 

Es: I don’t completely understand what you’re saying, but… Being in love and loving someone—are they really that important? 

Mahiru: They are.

Es: Hm.

Mahiru: They are… More so than anything else.

Es: I see now. [shifts] So, for you… that’s what it is. Prisoner number 6, Mahiru. 

Mahiru: Hm? What is?

Es: Somehow… After interrogating several people, I’ve started to get a rough idea of it. What you lot cherish, that is. 

Mahiru: So, what I cherish is ‘love’—is that what you’re saying? [giggles] Correct! It’s not like I was trying to cover it up or anything though. 

Es: Very well, does your homicide stem from love too? 

Mahiru: [pauses] I… guess it did. I think it was love. 

Es: So, because of love, you killed someone? 

Mahiru: I suppose… you’re right?

Es: I see. So, you became a murderer as a result of some relationship conflicts? Jealousy… Grudges… Having your partner stolen from you… Those stories aren't all that uncommon now are they? 

Mahiru: You’re wrong. It wasn’t that. I…never even wanted to kill anyone in the first place! 

Es: [pauses]

Mahiru: I just… I was… just being myself

Es: What do you mean by that?

Mahiru: [pauses] Not telling. After all, I still don’t know you that well, prison guard. 

Es: Hm. We should have a “mutual understanding” of each other, right? 

Mahiru: [giggles] Exactly!

Es: A troublesome one, aren’t you. But, that's fine with me. What are your own thoughts about it then? Do you think what you’ve done could be forgiven? Or was it absolutely unforgivable? 

Mahiru: Hmm. If you can’t forgive me for what I’ve done, then there’s no point in living—to be honest. [laughs] 

Es: So, if you can't kill anyone, there’s no point in you living—is that what you mean? My, oh, my… What a dangerous species you are.  

Mahiru: Oh, no! Uh… Those words actually sound kinda scary now that I think about it. I don’t want to kill anyone or do anything of the sort! But… 

Es: Hm

Mahiru: It's because I've… decided that I’m going to live for the sake of love.

Es: For the sake of love? 

Mahiru: I… discovered how amazing it was to be in love with someone. It’s incredible, you know? Each and every day seemed to sparkle and everything became so vibrant. It transforms such mundane sceneries into those out of soap operas and films! 

Es: I didn’t follow any of that.

Mahiru: [disappointed] I have a pretty poor vocabulary, so I can't describe it beyond clichéd phrases. But, I’m sure you’ll understand, prison guard! Once you fall in love, you’ll definitely get it! 

Es: Well, I wonder. 

Mahiru: Being in love is… If there was no such thing as love, then my life would be so bland. So, if you say that I won't be allowed it anymore, then there’s no point in me living. 

Es: Even if your love killed someone?

Mahiru: You’re so mean, aren’t you? 

Es: It was your love which killed someone, right? Despite that, will you still try to love another person? 

Mahiru: [thinks] Actually,  I was hoping you could tell me the answer to that, prison guard... If what I did was unforgivable. 

Es: What?

Mahiru: If my love could possibly kill someone, then I… shouldn't ever love another person again, I guess?

Es: [pauses]

Mahiru: Hey, prison guard, please tell me. If I love someone, is that something unforgivable?

Es: I don’t know. From the beginning, I never really understood what you were saying. 

Mahiru: Oh, I see... I guess so. There's something wrong with me, right? You can't understand me, right? 

Es: Yeah… as of now. 

Mahiru: Huh?

Es: As of now, I don't understand you—that’s what I’m saying. But, I will soon. Just wait and see. 

Mahiru: [excited]

Es: To be honest, the topics brought up in this interrogation were entirely outside my area of expertise. And, for that reason, I might have to deepen my understanding of it—just as you said. 

Mahiru: Prison guard…

Es: I’m your prison guard. Even if I have an aversion to something or if there’s something I can’t understand, I won’t just hopelessly give up on you like that… Not until I’ve judged your sins, and decided on whether I forgive them or not.

Mahiru: [happy] Does that mean you’ll always keep your eyes on me? 

Es: What? Well, it’s my duty after all. 

Mahiru: [exclaims] 

Es: What is it? 

Mahiru: My heart skipped a beat. 

Es: Just what on earth are you saying? 

Mahiru: I… guess I love people who are so enthusiastic about their work. 

Es: You… You’re messing with me, aren’t you? 

Mahiru: Ah, this isn’t good. Be careful, okay? Um… Um… If you’re that kind to me, you could die as well. Just—kidding?  

Es: I wasn’t trying to be kind to you or anything like that. I just downright, from beginning to end, had no idea what you were saying. However, I will promise you this. Rest assured. No matter what you do or what you think, I won’t die. 

Mahiru: [happy sound] 

Es: Because I’m Milgram’s prison guard—that’s why.  

Mahiru: [exclaims]

[mechanical noises]

Mahiru: W-what is this? Is it because my love exploded? 

Es: No. It’s the end of the interrogation. For goodness sake… And as always, things never go as I planned, do they? With you prisoners, I mean.

Mahiru: Uh… Um… This is what’ll be extracting songs, right? But, I’m not that good at singing though?

Es: It won't necessarily be you the one singing. Your mental landscape will present itself in the form of songs and videos—that’s all. 

Mahiru: So, you're gonna see everything… That's a little embarrassing. 

Es: Well, I don't know about that. The personal experiences I see, how true-to-life the videos are and their degree of abstraction—that all depends on the person. They might even depend on how each of you perceives your own sins.

Mahiru: Is that so? 

Es: Either way, I intend to find out what this world of yours looks like. 

Mahiru: I see. I see. I wanna watch it too. Because, for me, a world filled with love will be such a beautiful place. Oh! Prison guard, I’m sure you’ll understand how amazing love is through it as well. 

Es: Hmm. I’m looking forward to it.

Mahiru: Huh? That was unusually sincere of you.

Es: I just have a thirst for knowledge, that's all. Learning things you didn't know before is quite fun, don't you think? In order for me to understand the lot of you, I have to acquire knowledge from various fields. And, that's not exactly a bad thing in my books.

Mahiru: Really? I… guess I love studious people as well. 

Es: Shut it. 

Mahiru: You’re so mean.

Es: [sighs] The way I let you talk non-stop like that, it makes me feel like I didn't do my job properly. But, I'll ask you this just in case. Is there anything left you'd like to say? 

Mahiru: Ah… Um… Just one thing.

Es: Oh wow. You still have more to say?

Mahiru: Um… Uh, you know… Would it be okay for me to call you ‘Es’?

Es: No comment! [footsteps] Prisoner number 6, Mahiru. Come now. Sing your sins! 

As far as I’m aware, this isn’t a real publication, so unless Mahiru states the official romanisation of this author/publisher, I can only assume what it might be. I’ll update it if she does. Some alternatives might be Lane, Rein, Rain, Layne, etc. Don’t quote me on this, but I suspect that they might’ve based the magazine Mahiru reads on ‘Laurier Press’. ‘Lain’ looks similar to ‘Laurier’, so that’s why I chose it.

[imthecleric]

@zoomingupthathill​ said: ‘note’

[ x ]

Max -

First things first I never apologized for ruining that first Halloween you had with the party. And then subsequently making the rest of your life a living hell. And I don’t think a simple I’m sorry will do it, at least for the last part. Hopefully, it will be enough for the Halloween thing. And I am sorry. I had an episode, and you know what it really was by now, and then Mike was being... well Mike... to you so I’m sorry.

And those wont be the only apologies here, so you can shout about my apologies to my grave, or at my funeral. Please do. I only trust you to cause the havoc that should be there. If Mike gets mad, because you and I, and everyone else both know he will. Show him this as my explicit permission for you to get mad at me in the most public way possible for all my stupid apologies. It might even make my mom laugh a little. She hates the sorrys too.

Now, I know you never really liked D&D, but your a nerd just like the rest of us. Wonder Woman is a cool character, I think you would also like Kitty Pryde, from X-Men. I may be biased, because I really like X-Men, but give her a shot okay. For me.

Back to D&D, and I know you never really liked it mainly because Mike said no to your class idea. Which I think could totally work. Some of the classes need an overhaul anyways. And its not like both he and Lucas play subclasses of Fighters anyways. But I’ve been thinking, since like the summer of Starcourt. I actually think a baseline fighter, not Paladin like Mike, or Ranger like Lucas would totally work for your play style. With the right stats you could be super quick and sneaky, but also totally awesome. And you aren’t so limited in weapons, Lucas told me about how awesome you were with the nail-bat. Wish I could have seen it. I mean, if I was braver maybe I could have but... I’m not getting into that. Anyways, a baseline fighter can do so many cool things and we can create things based on fantasy and comics to work for what you want. Like a bait and switch, where you switch places with someone. And items, we could give you boots of striding to add to your movement. If you ever play, bring it up to the guys, Dustin would be your best bet.

Also pick to be a halfling, they can re-roll their natural ones. It’ll piss Mike off. I shouldn’t be saying that cause you know I lo... like Mike alot. I think you know how much. If anyone does its you and Jonathan. But I think it would make you laugh, and I’m all for that. I am not above laughing sometimes at Mike’s expense. I’m not there to do so, so count this as my blessing as his longest lifetime friend. Please carry on the tradition for me.

I’ve been kind of avoiding the elephant in the room. The fact that you’re reading this and I’m not there. No one was thrilled with the idea, which honestly baffled me as it seemed like the only option. Or maybe I was bit in shock that everyone cared so much. Either way, none of it was in vain. He’s gone. And if he comes back, then something tells me I will too. I am Zombie Boy after all. But he wont. You guys did it.

Be there for El. I know you. You will. But don’t forget about the guys too, they aren’t going to want to show how they really feel, they’re hurting. Don’t treat them any different though. I hated that. I hated when people thought I would break. They will too.

I’m not that great with words. You know that, art has always been my forte. But thank you. You have done so much for me. You have been there for me when the guys weren’t. You didn’t make me feel weird or left out that summer. You were one of the party I think from the moment the boys tried to get your identity out of Keith at Palace Arcade when you smashed Dustin’s Dig Dugg record.

I’m sorry I’m gone. And if you’re sad about it, I’m sorry for that. I like to think that any flash of red I see zooming by, is you. Even if its not, it’ll be a nice reminder of your brightness.

- Will

On the bottom of the letter is a fully colored halfling, in bright armor much like Max’s clothes she was known for wearing, with flaming red hair blowing in the breeze, she’s running about to take a jump to smash an orc with a weapon that looks suspiciously like a nail bat.

[twstedrabbithole]

Ooh, may I please have so e headcanons for Idia, Vil, and Lillia for when reader has already made the tough decision to go home a while back, then suddenly their Magicam account pops a notification for a stream called "House Tour and Chill Stream because apparently I can still access this site from here somehow". In it, there's a house tour, as well as plans to often do chill and/or gaming streams, as well as the occasional travel video to show off some notable places in their world.

Hmm, this shall be a tough one indeed! Mostly cause dumb ol me is trying to fully understand this. But I am here to serve you hotshot, so I'll try me best!! If it isn't what you wanted send it in again or heck, or even a different one!

I took some inspiration from me own relationship for some!

First things first, this guy is gonna immediately try to hack into the device that's using the account. Because there's no possible way his s/o can still access their magicam account.

But once he figures it out it is actually you, he's close to crying. He has a way to keep in contact with you! He's gonna immediately dm you to talk with you, and after a lovely talk (read as him sobbing over his phone while he texts) he'll immediately join any and all streams!

He's your number one fan! Even if you never get popular (which you undoubtedly will because you'll be showing an unknown world to the public), he'll always try to be at every stream. Even if he can't make some, know he's there to give you his utmost support!

If any streams are of gaming he's so gonna want to join in, even talk on stream too! It'll be very amusing to watch as two lovers scream at each other as they play a fighting game, especially if they start trying to fluster each other to win.

All in all, even though you two can't physically be there for each other, you two can still make your relationship work. It'll even give Idia more motivation to work on a portal that will let you two travel to and from your home worlds.

Vil would certainly be curious, but he would assume his s/o's account got hacked. Which would immediately upset him, as it defiles one of the last things he has of his s/o. He wouldn't want anyone to know but he does regularly go through the account to relive memories you two had.

But to his shock, when he sees your face on the screen, he almost cries (almost, wouldn't want his makeup to run in the middle of the day. Even if it's waterproof-).

He won't be able to make every stream, what with his busy schedule already. But he does show his support in dms and calls. Speaking of calls, he's gonna be calling you when he has the time to. He misses your voice, especially if it's saying words for only him to hear.

You're likely already popular because Vil had promoted you before, but now you've become even more popular because of the wonderful sights you show to the other world. Even Vil is amazed at some parts of the world, wishing in his head that he could see these sights physically with you.

In the end you two try to make things work as you both pursue your own careers. In the end it may not work out, but you two will still love each other greatly. Even if your worlds apart.

My my, this old fae certainly didn't expect this! He didn't think your account would be active once more, since you had to leave. He knew it had to be someone else who somehow got access to your account.

But oh no! It was you! Oh how happy this makes the fae! He's going to immediately call you after the stream, asking tons of questions of how and why. When you can't answer he hums in thought, but chooses not to question this turn of fate.

Lilia will be an in between of Idia and Vil, he'll join most streams but his schedule will cause him to not make some. But he's so supportive and interactive that most who now know you by your streams know of him as well!

If you ever do any gaming streams this old man will beg to join, only to end up be better at it than you. If you're playing against eachother he'll constantly tease you to win, not that he needed the extra trick.

When you show the parts of your world he'll be asking lots of questions about the history and culture. It's all so interesting to learn the history of an unknown world after all!

All in all, Lilia will be very supportive and you both try your hardest to keep the relationship. Honestly this also gives him motivation to find a way to traverse both worlds so he can physically touch you again.

[ladyfeldspar]

21x02: Put It Down

I've wanted to do a watch/writeup of this episode for a while now. Tweek has been my favorite character since Gnomes aired, when I was still in elementary school and secretly watching South Park with my dad at night. Craig, while I enjoyed him as a character before, absolutely won my heart in the Pandemics and gets third favorite. (My second favorite is Clyde but that doesn't matter right now.)

And when I got into SP fanfiction, and discovered that Creek was a thing, I hopped right on that train and have never looked back. Tweek x Craig made my life when I first saw it and this episode... Well, you'll see.

Disclaimer: I have A LOT of feelings about this episode. Sorry not sorry about how long this is.

"...a performance by one of our students who has written a song..." Raise your hand if the first time you watched, you also figured it was Cartman, the most musical one of the kids.

Raise your other hand if you also got unreasonably excited when it was Tweek.

Tweek "playing" piano is both exactly what I would have expected, and nothing at all what I expected.

I really, really just want to give this poor kid a hug, Jesus Christ.

Everyone just looks so shocked, but I feel like Kyle and Stan might actually care?

"He's your boyfriend, dude." Ugh, my HEART. They are legit and adorable and that's not the last time I'm going to say that.

Shut up, Cartman. I mean it's great you don't care if someone's gay or straight or whatever but shut the hell up.

Tweek being scared of his locker slamming, oh my gosh.

Okay. Jesus Christ. This. We've known Craig for almost 21 seasons at this point and he has been incredibly well-established as not caring about a whole hell of a lot. So when he comes up to Tweek actively trying to help him and chill him out it melts my icy heart SO MUCH more than a cool island song ever could.

I generally hate the terms "babe" and "honey" (I'm honestly just not one for pet names) but Craig calling Tweek those things is fucking adorable.

Side thought: I want another episode just about the two of them, and I want Tweek to be wearing Craig's hat.

"Cuuupcaaaaakes!?" Kills me every time.

Heidi is too sweet for Cartman.

Stan you're such a douche but I love you anyway.

Tweek's cupcakes are frosted 1000% better than mine ever are.

But his kitchen looks just like mine after a day of baking.

Fuck you Garrison for ruining Tweek's happy little moment. He deserves all the happiness in the world.

Craig just calmly walking into the kitchen, like, was he there the whole time? Just hanging out letting Tweek do what he had to do and destroy the kitchen? More proof that they're legit - find me anyone else that Craig has supported this much.

Like he went out and bought Tweek a fidget spinner how fucking cute is that?!

Okay. "Go ahead and bomb us, Kim Jong Dong," also makes me laugh for like twenty minutes.

Why is this song so catchy?! Why are Cartman's songs always so fucking catchy?? Like Minorities which I constantly have to stop myself from absentmindedly singing in public.

Logic!Cartman is remarkably inclusive.

Mic drop.

Poor Tweek, like Jesus, his dad is infuriating and so stupid. Not Randy level stupid but like, quit shoving a fidget spinner in your kid's face and actually talk to him for Christ's sake.

But I mean, this is also the parent who pointed a gun at Tweek's head while teaching him how to avoid being abducted, so I don't know what I expect of him honestly.

That poor kid getting run over. And yet it's that part of the story that pushes this episode into feeling like a older episode and is half the reason I love it so much. There's a really good point to be made, but the constant killing of kids by distracted drivers gives it the fucked up South Park edge.

I love PC Principal in this episode too, and how he just doesn't really care what the hell Cartman wants.

Open door, turn on light, close door. "Waaaaaagghhhh!" "Hey, Tweek."

You have to wonder how often this has happened. And AGAIN, more proof that Craig really legitimately cares about Tweek. Imagine if anyone else woke Craig up like this. I really don't think he'd be so calm.

But it's Tweek, so he just yawns and deals with it because that's what you do when you care about someone.

Also, Craig sleeps with his hat on and that's adorable.

I love how they edited Tweek's picture into real photos.

I feel so bad for Craig here. And through most of the episode actually. He's doing all he knows to do, because this is the kind of stuff that helps him. He's really trying, and Tweek's just wired differently.

And he has a stuffed astronaut monkey, because long live Spaceman Craig.

Again, shut up Cartman.

He brought him to an AMUSEMENT PARK, Craig has pink cotton candy, and they're holding hands. It's this kind of stuff that makes my brain explode from cuteness.

"THE FERRIS WHEEL!!!"

Of all Tweek's twitch noises, I for some reason find the, "rrrrgh" he does on the Ferris Wheel one of the cutest ones.

This fight breaks my heart a little because again, Craig is trying. He has put so much effort into doing his best to help Tweek and finally, finally gets frustrated. It shows how much patience he has for Tweek that it took him so long to get to this point.

I just want to hug them both during this fight. God knows they need it. It's just such a realistic argument, ugh.

And then this moment. This moment where everything clicks, both for us (the parallels of Logic!Cartman/logical Craig vs emotional kids needing to grieve/emotional Tweek needing to freak out) and for Craig, who finally realizes that everyone handles stress differently and you have to adapt to their coping mechanisms to be able to help them. And as soon as he puts that together, he's off to go find Tweek because he's worth it to him. And my heart melts again.

And he does so well, too, despite being completely out of his element. Their little smiles after Tweek calms down, Jesus Christ.

This song. THIS SONG. I don't know what it is about this song but it just hits me SO hard every time. Tweek actually being able to play the piano beautifully (I will argue that it's because Craig is there with him and that makes Tweek feel so much better), CRAIG SINGING even though he clearly isn't the most comfortable with it and is obviously doing it for Tweek (ANOTHER point of proof for the realness of their relationship), the chorus, the Cartman rap (!!!!), the memorial of distracted driving victims (Kenny)...

And this moment, right here. When it goes back to the two of them there, and the spotlight focuses on them and they smile at each other, just oh my gosh. I get really weepy almost every time I watch this. They're adorable. They support each other. They're willing to grow and adapt for each other. They have a real connection with each other. They're happy together. Like look at Craig's smile. How can you not love that?!

Thanks for reading my rambling disjointed nonsense. This episode is always going to be one of my favorites. Tweek and Craig forever. The end. 💜

[achubbydumpling]

Modern Bucky is fat and Steve’s sugar baby. Steve likes to spoil him. :3

eyy only took me a month and a half to answer 😂😂 I'm sorry, nonnie, but I'm highjacking your idea and using it for today's chubtober prompt :D

(I ended up having a lot more ideas for this than I could actually finish writing in time, so this ends pretty abruptly as soon as Steve and Bucky actually meet)

[unfinished] Oct 3: Masks and Malfunctions

Rating: Mature Words: 1911 Relationship: James “Bucky” Barnes/Steve Rogers Additional Tags: Sugar Daddy AU, Daddy Kink, Belly Kink, Weight Gain, Verbal Humiliation, Stuffing, Corsets, Age Gap

Bucky’s phone chimed and he didn’t even have to look at the screen to know that “Steve” just sent him more than enough money for the costume Bucky wanted. He didn’t actually know if that was the guy’s real name, but he’d been funding Bucky’s lifestyle since the beginning of college and Bucky wasn’t about to fuck that up by questioning the guy’s identity.

If this were a normal Halloween party Bucky would have just bought a random costume at Spirit Halloween, but his kinda boyfriend Jonas (it’s complicated) had invited him as a plus one to an actual masquerade ball. Bucky didn’t even know those kinds of things existed outside of fantasy novels, but right now he was at a high-end clothing store getting an “appropriate” costume.

[Bucky] Thank you, Daddy❤

Bucky texted Steve and then went back to trying on another dress shirt. This one had a looser cut that reminded him of something the male love interest in a period drama would wear or a pirate.

“Wonderful choice,” the store clerk told Bucky when he stepped back from the mirror. Bucky would probably never get used to having someone help him pick out clothes, but the higher-end stores Bucky had been to all offered this type of assistance.

“It drapes very well,” the clerk said with a sneer on his face. Bucky turned back to the mirror. Yes, he had to admit he’d fallen victim to the freshman 15. A small belly was rounding out even against the loose fabric of the shirt, but he didn’t actually feel self-conscious.

Steve had complimented him on every single one of those pounds. Bucky probably wouldn’t even have noticed all the changes to his body if Steve hadn’t been constantly talking about them. Bucky had never put much effort into maintaining his physique, but being hyped up by Steve over the smallest changes of his body made him feel desired and his heart fluttered every time his sugar daddy complimented his thicker thighs and soft belly.

“Any other suggestions?” Bucky asked and the clerk scoffed.

“A corset,” he muttered under his breath, but Bucky’s ears pricked up at the suggestion. His first instinct was to text Steve. Bucky didn’t know why it was important for him to know Steve’s opinion when Bucky was going to the party as someone else’s plus one, but excitement stirred in Bucky’s stomach at what Steve might say.

“Sure, get the corset.” Bucky sent the clerk on their way and then sat down to text Steve. He could feel his belly straining against the shirt buttons now that he was sitting down and he snapped a picture of the way the buttons on the otherwise loose shirt were straining over the thickest part of his belly.

[Bucky] Daddy~ they’re telling me I’m fat

[Bucky] they said I need a corset

[Steve] You will look incredible either way.

Annoyance prickled at the back of Bucky’s neck from the generic compliment.

[Bucky] that’s not what I asked

[Steve] You didn’t ask anything.

Bucky rolled his eyes at how literal Steve could sometimes be, but Bucky also didn’t know how to ask for what he really wanted to hear.

Some of his classmates had teased him for his weight gain and instead of making Bucky feel insecure, the hot shame had shot straight to his dick and he’d had to excuse himself to deal with the problem. Since then Bucky couldn’t stop thinking about Steve telling him those things.

Bucky didn’t even know what the guy looked like, but he’d quickly developed a crush just from texting him. It was actually fun to talk. Bucky couldn’t understand how the guy was single when he seemed like this perfect, interesting and kind guy—and rich on top of all that.

There has to be something wrong with him, but so far Bucky hadn’t been able to figure it out. Not for the first time Bucky wondered who Steve actually was, but his thoughts were interrupted when the clerk came back with three different corsets.

All the same material and color, just different cuts. Bucky’s eyes were immediately drawn to the tiny waist cincher—just tall enough to cover the widest part of his belly. Despite his grumblings the clerk helped Bucky lace up the corset and when he looked in the mirror he couldn’t believe it was him looking back.

His entire body shape seemed different. From the billowing sleeves of the shirt emphasizing his wide shoulders to the waist cincher doing an excellent job of making it look like he still had a waist instead of the soft belly that was hidden underneath. The simple black slacks he was wearing completed his outfit. Simple colors, just black and white.

The mask he had chosen matched as well. A deep midnight black that contrasted with his piercing blue eyes and gold detailing that caught the light when Bucky turned his head. He snapped another picture for Steve, but didn’t wait for his response. Bucky could still hardly believe that a single outfit could be this expensive, but Steve of course had transferred enough money to pay for it. On his way home Bucky finally checked his phone.

[Steve] What did I tell you? Incredible.

[Bucky] better than without the corset?

[Steve] This feels like a set-up.

Bucky groaned at Steve’s response. Of course, Bucky would luck out and get the sugar daddy that won’t humiliate him for gaining fifteen pounds before the semester was even over and wasn’t that a personal revelation. Bucky had never thought of himself as someone who could want something like this, but since gaining weight he had become more aware of his body—and how others perceived it.

[Bucky] it is

He quickly pocketed his phone after sending that text. Bucky immediately regretted it. He’d had a good thing going with Steve. Why risk fucking that up? His phone vibrated multiple times, but Bucky was too worried to check his messages until he got home. As soon as he’d closed the apartment door behind him he fished his phone out of his pocket.

[Steve] What does that mean?

[Steve] If you don’t want to continue this arrangement, you can just tell me.

[Steve] Bucky.

[Steve] Answer me.

[Steve] What do you want me to say? That you’re a spoiled pig? That you’ve gotten fat on your Daddy’s money and need a corset to look good for your little boytoy?

Bucky’s throat went dry as he read Steve’s message. The wave of lust that crashed through him, threw him off balance and he sat down heavily on the bench in the entry way of his apartment. He read the message again. And again. His dick gave an interested twitch. It was embarrassing how much he reacted to Steve’s words.

[Steve] Is that what you want?

[Steve] Don’t leave me on read.

Bucky didn’t know what to say. He typed and retyped the same message again until another one from Steve popped up.

[Steve] ‘Yes’ or ‘no’? It can’t be this hard to type one fucking word.

Bucky couldn’t breathe. Steve had always been kind and considerate, it made Bucky’s heart race to see this side of him.

[Bucky] Yes.

[Steve] Thank you, but we will talk more about this tomorrow.

Bucky’s phone chimed to tell him, he should be on his way now if he wanted to get to the party on time. His mind was still caught up in foggy arousal, his cock tenting his slacks. It’s too much, he wasn’t thinking straight and Steve wasn’t even here—wasn’t even touching him. Just a text and Bucky was a mess.

At least the walk to the subway station helped to clear Bucky’s head and chase away some of the immediate, burning need that had been burning in his guts just a few minutes earlier. It left him frustrated, but slightly more level-headed and in a more appropriate mood to be out in public.

When Bucky met up with Jonas outside the high-rise office building the guy was already wasted. He was surrounded by his office buddies and Bucky was honestly about to turn on his heel and go back home when Jonas called out to him. With all his mates there Jonas treated Bucky like another one of them and Bucky was already over the metaphorical dick-measuring contest that was happening whenever one of these guys opened their mouth.

Once they got inside Bucky split off from the group, Jonas didn’t even seem to notice. So, he explored the venue. The party stretched across multiple floors. The bottom floor was full of rich and wanna-be rich people schmoozing and socializing, barely anyone of them had stuck to the masquerade theme and Bucky kept debating whether he should take off his own mask.

He was much more comfortable on the upper floor. There were less people here and most of them kept to themselves. He felt less out of place when he noticed that most of the people here stuck to the masquerade theme, there were only a few people who’s face wasn’t at least partially hidden behind a mask.

Jonas didn’t even shoot him a quick text to ask where he had disappeared to, so Bucky was more than ready to just find whatever food this place offered, eat for free tonight and make the best of the situation. He didn’t know what he’d expected dating someone his age, but Bucky was done settling for anything and he made a resolution to break up whatever was going on between him and Jonas.

When Bucky finally found the buffet that was standard for these types of events, he couldn’t stop himself from loading up two plates and searching for a quiet, secluded place to eat. At this point it had become a reflex to send Steve a text whenever he sat down to stuff himself.

[Bucky] found the food

He sent a picture with his hand next to the plates to give Steve a sense of how big they were. Some guy’s phone went off as soon as Bucky hit send two tables over and for a moment Bucky wondered if that’s Steve.

He had a commanding presence even sitting down. Bucky could tell he’s a gym buff from his ridiculous shape. His shoulders looked almost double the size of his waist. As well as the large plate of food in front of him. This man needed to fuel his body with all those calories, but Bucky was eating more than him and only planning on getting fatter. Bucky dug in.

His little costume went from fitting perfectly fine to too tight within half a plate of food. The corset was throwing a wrench into Bucky’s plan of stuffing himself. He already felt full before he had even really gotten started. The blond guy from two tables over caught Bucky’s eye again. He was frowning at his phone and looking back up at Bucky.

[Steve] What are you doing here?

[Bucky] what do you mean?

Another phone chime from two tables down. Bucky re-read the text two times before he looked back at the blond guy. No way that’s Steve. That would be too much of a coincidence, right? Bucky sent another message and the guy’s phone went off again. For a moment Bucky contemplates just getting up and walking away, but then Steve was already out of his chair and walking up to Bucky’s table.

[penguinwithitsarseonfire]

Dance For All We’ve Been Through

Pairing: Eleventh Doctor x Reader

Word Count: 1,771

Warnings: None

Summary: To stop a meteor hitting a small planet, the Doctor creates an elaborate plan involving a planet wide dance competition to stop it.

Request: I read in your tags that you were feeling fluff and I love how you write 11! Could you do 44 fluff with 11 please? and maybe with the Ponds there too? Prompt: “You’re an idiot” / “But I’m your idiot”

A/N: I don’t know what this is, I’m so sorry. This came from discussing Rick and Morty after a rehearsal in which there was a dance off.

The plan was bizarre – straight up weird, and, if it was anyone besides the Doctor, you would have had no faith that it would work.

Rory had finished drawing up a scaled version of the planet you were currently standing on. The planet was small - Pluto small, and a part of you wanted to cradle the drawing in your hands.

"How's this?" He asked, looking to Amy, then to you.

"It's good," you said, then, more of an aside. "I didn't know you could draw."

"We made him design all our aliens as kids,” Amy commented, and she leaned over Rory to get a better look at the map. "Where's the meteor supposed to hit?"

You had forgotten his name, but the president of the planet; a stocky man with a receding hairline, his purple face red from stress, hissed. "Don't say that so loud. If people know, it will cause a panic."

You groaned. "We've been through this. If we can't tell people, if we can't even tell your government-"

"We are not telling the government," he spat. He straightened, and you noticed his skin going back to a pale shade of purple. "My people are a fragile sort."

You ran a hand through your hair, trying to stifle your groan of frustration. He really wasn't making it easy.

The Doctor then ran into the room, and you almost cheered. The timing was perfect. You wouldn’t have to deal with the president now, the Doctor could. He would listen to the Doctor, everyone listened to the Doctor.

He came in to the sound of bells clattering against each-other, and you noticed that there actually were bells, draped over him like a sleigh bells. In fact, his whole body was decorated with an assortment of tinsel and lights. He looked like he was cosplaying a Christmas tree. "Almost done setting up the stage," he said. "How are we going in here?"

He was a strange dichotomy. In any other situation, you could image he would be grinning gleefully. The lights, the tinsel, the stage, the music, even, it was all up the Doctor's alley. Minus the planet destroying meteor.

His mouth, however, was pulled into a grim line.

It was the only clue you had that the Doctor was worried, too.

"Where's the meteor hitting?" Amy asked, with a slight pinch in her lips. She had noticed then, too.

"Oh it shouldn't be a problem," The Doctor waved to her, and his face morphed into a grin, which, by now, after all the times you had seen him do it, you knew wasn’t genuine. "All we need to do is move the planet by an inch or so, the meteor should fly right past."

“All we need,” the Doctor straightened and pointed to the three of you. “Is a dance move.”

“Ah,” you stared at your friends, who mirrored your blank expression.

Amy chewed her lip. “The macarena?”

You brightened. “Oh! That would be easy to teach everyone, it’s a classic!”

The Doctor physically slumped. “The macarena? Anyone can do the macarena,” he bumbled into the table, jingling away like a cheesy Christmas carol – which, why did you keep making Christmas metaphors – and came to your side.  He leaned over you, studying the map.

He was close, you could feel some of the tinsel brush against your shoulder. He traced his finger along the edge of the planet, and in doing so he inadvertently moved further into your space. It was… warm. Safe. “If we sink the planet down – essentially, that’s not what we’re actually doing, the meteor-“

The president hissed.

The Doctor ignored him. “-Should just fly overhead. It means we need a dance move with extra oomph, where everyone dances…” he trailed off, turning to you. “Together.”

The Doctors eyes were so close to yours, you could see little flecks of gold in the green of his irises – something you had never noticed before.

From the side, you thought you heard someone – Amy, say something about pushing someone together to kiss.

You heard Rory say something else, something about being against the rules of the bet.

You decided to ignore them both. There were more pressing matters anyway

“So a partnered dance?” You said.

“Hang on,” Rory said. “Dancing – why are we dancing?”

“Oh,” The Doctor clapped his hands. “I love this part.”

“The explaining why you’re oh so very clever part?” Amy supplied.

“Exactly,” The Doctor said. He brushed his hands across the map. “Now, because Mr. Mean Purple Man-”

“President Button,” the president huffed.

“-Won’t let us tell the public the danger, which, judging by how your bodies can spontaneously combust under mass stress, isn’t a bad idea, it means we need a discreet way of solving the issue.”

“So… dancing?” Rory said.

“Dancing,” The Doctor said. “You see, it’s experimental, but, if everyone were to jump at the same time, whilst we’re all in the air, the planet should move an inch or so, just from the sheer force of conflict against the planets gravity. Then, it’s tricky, because, when we land, it will either move the planet another inch or…”

“Or?” The president said.

“Or move the planet back.”

“Oh,” you said, dejectedly. The planet moving back would be bad. Very bad.

You tried to think of an idea. What would make the planet move. “Wait,” you said, forming an idea. “So if two people are holding each other when they jump, shouldn’t they be able to jump higher? It’s got to do with momentum, right?”

“Correctumndo Y/L/N!” The Doctor beamed at you. “And we need to make sure everyone jumps in appropriately…” The Doctor stared at his plans. “37 minutes. Easy.”

Which was how, half an hour later, you ended up standing on a stage in a broadcast directed to the entire planet.

The dance wasn’t too difficult, all things considered. It was, however, ridiculous.

It had all the traits that made the Doctor… outlandishly goofy. There was a move that involve the Doctors strange giraffe arms - which he delighted in making you do, and a twirl that involved the two of jumping together, holding each-others forearms. If it were any other saturation, you would have felt self-conscious, hell, you would have felt downright absurd.

You laughed lightly when he demonstrated the wavey arm giraffe move again. He was brilliant, but he was also such an idiot. You paused for a moment, watching as he addressed the camera.

He was wonderful.

Standing on the stage, in front of all those cameras, talking to millions of people, felt so strange. The bright TV lights blared down on you. They were hot, and, after demonstrating the dance a couple of times, you could feel a sheen of sweat form on your brow.

The Doctor checked his watch. He looked to you, his expression grim. You didn’t have much time now.

“Alright,” you said, addressing the camera’s. “To win the competition, you must do the dance in time with us,” you said. “It what we humans,” you gestured to the Doctor, who was completely not human. “Value above all else in dance.”

Also a lie.

Amy grinned at you from behind the camera. She gave you an encouraging thumbs up.

“We’ll dance with you,” you continued. “And, whoever has the best timing, will win!”

You had no idea if you were convincing, but it was the best you could do.

So you danced.

It was, honestly, a blur. The only thing you could concentrate on was on the Doctor. The way his arms held you as you moved, the way his eyes shone when he twirled you under the lights.

Finally, finally, as Rory called out time, you both jumped into the air, clutching each other as you did so. In the corner of your eye, you saw the crew, Amy and Rory, even the President, jump into the air, and…

It was incredible.

It was like you could hear it. The entire population move as one, the planet shifting underneath your feet. You wanted to close your eyes, hold your breath, in case the meteor did come and all of you were brutally killed in an instant.

But you didn’t, you couldn’t look away. Because the Doctor was right in front of you, looking at you so sure, so positive that this would work out. He looked at you like you were brighter than the lights shining above you.

Then, you landed.

And nothing happened.

Nothing at all.

A loud cheer erupted over the room, and you couldn’t help joining in.

Here was this man, with his ridiculous, mad plan.

And it had worked.

After everything, when the four of you had wandered back to the TARDIS, and the President had thanked you for the fourteenth time, the Doctor took your hand. "Well then, I'd say that was another success. Where to next? I know a planet that makes amazing ice cream."

Amy laughed. "That dance was ridiculous, it was worse than my wedding."

"Oi, I’ll have you know that I've won dance offs with that move," he did an awkward wave, which was only made worse since you didn't join in, so it stopped rather sadly by your hand.

You laughed brightly. “You’re an idiot.”

The Doctor grinned at you. "Yes, but I am your idiot.”

You paused, doing a double take. Did he just-

"Oh," the Doctor paled as three pairs of stunned eyes stared at him. "Did I say that out loud?"

You processed what he had said. That he was.. well, yours. That was… well, that was amazing, really.

You squeezed his hand. "Good," you said. "I can't very well have you running off and being an idiot on your own."

Rory stared at you blankly. There was a beat, then he spoke. "Did - did you two just become a couple?" He brightened. "Did I just win the bet?"

There was a thump and Rory doubled over, clutching his stomach. He hissed out Amy's name, and, when you turned to face her, she was standing there with large, doe eyes, completely oblivious to her husband. She looked the picture of innocence.

You didn't believe her for a second.

You stood on your tip toes and placed a delicate kiss on the Doctors cheek. His blush reached the tips of his ears. "Take me on a date and we'll see," you said, enveloped in a ball of confidence. "Space boy." You squeezed his hand and winked at Amy, before stepping into the TARDIS.

From the outside, you thought you heard someone cheer.

It put a small smile on your face.

[amyscascadingtabs]

don’t want to keep secrets just to keep you [chapter 2]

CHAPTER TWO: see me in hindsight, tangled up with you all night

excerpt below, read whole thing on ao3

Amy doesn't return to the office until after she's spent a good hour at home. First, she showers, washing off yesterday's old makeup and grime and letting the warm water run over her shoulders as she lets the sweet scent of raspberry shower gel replace the vague smell of old beer and sweat. Her back is sore; probably thanks to Jake's lumpy mattress, she thinks, and wonders for a second if she should add buy new mattress to the contract before deciding it’s far too much. That's relationship stuff, and that's point one of the contract; that's not what this is.

She blow-dries her hair and replaces her makeup, taking extra care to try and cover a pink mark that sits just a little too high on her chest before giving up and picking a different shirt instead. Then she fills the biggest coffee cup she has, eats a buttered slice of toast standing up, and feeds her pet fish before rushing back out the door.

She probably looks fresher than most days once she's done, but she's still worried Gina can sense something from her secretary desk as Amy walks in. She raises a brow in greeting like she's actually interested, which is rare in itself, and Amy can feel her eyes on her as she walks into her own office and closes the door behind her.

Amy starts regretting her decision as soon as she's opened a new document. What is she even supposed to name it? Friends with benefits contract is too obvious. FWB-C sounds like code for something. Sex agreement makes her sound like someone who’s read Fifty Shades Of Grey too many times (which really is just once). Jake and Amy is a wedding invitation, Rules too general. She puts her head in her hands, staring at the blinking line, and groans. Then she writes in Jake, looks at that for a moment, and adds stuff after. Not her proudest, but it'll have to do.

Amy’s relieved she doesn't have much work to do today, because she spends every free minute she can come across tweaking details on the document, adding and removing sections to suggest. When she's finally happy with the result, she saves it in a personal folder she can be sure no one’s ever going to open, and praises the office-gods for the fact that she has her own printer.

~

There’s a faint smell of artificial lemon in the air of Jake’s apartment as he welcomes her in, and the thought that he might have cleaned for her makes Amy blush. It seems unlike him, but the living room area does appear less cluttered to her than it did this morning, so maybe he isn’t totally incapable of it. She still doesn’t want to check his cabinets.

“You cleaned,” she says instead, nodding to the couch that looks almost neat now. “You expecting to get lucky tonight, or something?” Jake’s cheeks turn an adorable shade of pink, but then he shakes his head and points to her outfit. “You’re one to speak.”

All Amy’s done is put on a maroon floral blouse with lower cleavage than she’d ever do for work and put on a touch of pink lipstick, but he’s not completely wrong. She still chooses to ignore him. “I’ve got the contract. Should we do this, then?”

He offers her an orange soda, which she declines, but accepts a mug of Earl Grey tea from a package that seems to have remained unopened since before the brand last changed its design. A hot drink might calm her nerves, she hopes, but it ends up being quite the distracting experience to watch him make it for her. She tries to read through the contract one last time while searching for spelling errors she knows aren't there, her eyes keep being drawn to his hands as he holds the label of the teabag between his thumb and index finger, bobbing the bag a few times with focus once he's finished pouring the water into a New York Knicks mug. It's hard not to think about how those fingers felt dancing across her skin yesterday, massaging the sides of her breasts and holding on to her inner thighs, and it's harder not to imagine what they'd feel like another time –

“Tea,” he interrupts her thoughts by placing the mug in front of her. “Thought maybe you wanted a cup that didn’t say NYPD on it.”

“Well, you're right in that.” She brings it to her lips, almost burning her tongue and hoping he didn't see. “You want to read it on your own, or should I read it to you?”

Jake sits back in the massage chair closest to her, spreading his legs and putting his palms on them before shooting her that disarming smile again. “You read it.”

Amy swallows hard. “Okay. Section one: relationship status. This arrangement only works if we're both single. We’re not bringing more people into this.”

“What about an open relationship?”

“No. Still complicated. This is complicated enough with just us. If either of us gets in an actual relationship, it's over.”

Jake nods. “Cool. Next rule?”

“Section two: appropriate behavior. We're not dating,” she says, pointing first at herself and then at him with the ballpoint pen she brought from work. “So we can't behave like we're dating. Outside of our apartments, we're strictly friends. Or acquaintances. Honestly, it's weird we're even friends.”

“But you admitted we're friends.”

“Sure.” She takes another sip of the tea. “But that means no public flirting, no inappropriate comments, no like, commenting heart or fire emojis on Instagram pictures –”

“Are these rules for you or for me?” Jake winks. “I know my selfies are stunning, but I’m sure you can control yourself.”

“For both of us. Section three: we part in the morning. No exceptions. Staying overnight is okay, but once we wake up, we’re done.”

“What counts as morning in this scenario? I’m not going to have to get up at six a.m., am I?”

“Not unless you stay at my place when I have work.”

“I’ll remember not to do that, then.”

“Great. Section four – protection.”

“You have an entire section on that?” Jake looks like he’s trying not to laugh.

“It’s important!” She exclaims, feeling herself getting defensive. “I have an implant, so we’re safe from pregnancy, but it’s either condoms or you need to get checked.”

Jake nearly spits out some of his orange soda, coughing slightly. “You must be fun at parties.”

“I’m actually a nationally accredited and registered chaperone.”

“What is that?”

“Doesn’t matter. Are you going to do it or not?”

“Fine. You, then?”

“I will if you want me to.” Amy shrugs. “But I haven’t slept with anyone since my ex, so we should be good.”

Jake’s eyebrows fly up. “Really?”

“That so surprising to you?”

“A little? In the least jerk-ish way possible, you must get, well… offers.”

“People don’t flirt a whole lot with their lawyers,” she says, shifting in her chair and crossing her legs. “And it hasn’t been my focus. Are we good with the contract?”

“Actually, I want to add one more rule.”

“Yeah?”

Jake leans back in his chair, crossing his arms behind his head and flexing his biceps through the green shirt with a smug grin. “You’re not allowed to fall in love with me.”

Amy looks at him for a moment, trying to determine whether or not he’s joking, but he doesn’t waver, so she leans forward and draws a fifth section sign on the blank space left on the document. No developing feelings or this ends, she prints out in capital letters, signing her name on the allotted line.

“Won’t be a problem.”

Jake signs the contract, and Amy tries not to grimace at how messy his signature is as she places the document in a thin plastic folder, promising him a copy tomorrow.

“Cool,” Jake nods. He’s messing up his curls with his right hand again, the way she’s noticed he does when he’s trying to flirt. She wonders if it’s strategy or nerves. “So, are you doing anything else tonight, or...”

“What, contract signing’s got you all hot and bothered?”

“I mean, seeing you in full lawyer mode. It’s not, not hot.”

“Double negation?” Amy scrunches her nose. “Oh, you’re going to have to make that one up to me.”

“Maybe I will,” he says, and she needs only to notice the way his eyes darken to know that it’s on.

Amy can feel her legs still shaking a little as she hails a cab outside Jake's apartment just after, and she closes her eyes in the backseat and wonders how it's possible to feel this amazing, this satisfied from a cocktail of what she knows is mostly dopamine and oxytocin. It still makes her feel all giggly, like she can't stop smiling to herself.

Her phone vibrates in her pocket, and she picks it up to read a text from Jake.

Fucking hell that was SO GOOD.

Maybe this friends with benefits thing won't be so bad after all.

~