#holy shit it's so damn sad
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LOOSING MY DAMN MIND😃 WHY DID SJM WRITE ACOTAR SO SHITTILY????? WERE THERE NO EDITORS OR ANY PERSON WITH A DAMN BRAIN TO RETHINK THE SHIT SHE HAS WRITTEN???? MY CHILDHOOD IS RUINED.
#acotar#the acotar rhysand#rhysand#feyre#rhysand is an abuser#this is so clear now#oh my god#holy shit sjm#what the hell were you thinking?#I'm so sad#acotar was my first fantasy fiction#damn#and rhysand was my first love#why#why do i do this to myself#its never a good idea to go down the rabbit hole of a book series
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the 39 clues girlies are having a field day in the notes of a post I made months ago and all I can do is gaze upon them fondly as I remember the most passionate late lover of my life
#they want to revive the fandom 🥹#oh the stories i could tell#jesus my t39c hyperfixation was definitely a Time. i don't think I've had a more intense hyperfixation ever#i can STILL name all the clues off the top of my head. five years later#i feel like a grandma#i don't get as sad over it or as excited every time i see a sign of someone wanting to revive the fandom as i used to but#your first love never dies and all#throwback to that time i tried to organise an internet clue hunt!!! we should totally do that on tumblr it could be so fun#i had so many ideas damn#the 39 clues#liveblogging.pdf#holy shit wait it's more like 7 years now. not five#broooooo#almost 8 tbh#i miss the site i miss the ffn forums i miss the books being in stores...#i miss the gc that made me get a tumblr in the firstplace#oof#i do not play about this series when i say i am INSUFFERABLE about it#i literally used to think about it 24/7 for years not exaggerating#i had to relate everything to it i still do#i was fully convinced i was an undercover lucian agent#who am I kidding i still do#i don't have one notebook without all the clues listed in them from some time i was bored in class
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i'm sorry i'm physically unable to mind my own business but what happened that made you block ppl?? 👀👀
Sigh...i don't wanna start anything because I genuinely don't care about these people enough to but Ive blocked like 3 people this past month In this fandom because I cannot stand the way they treat miles and Alex purely based of fictional shit and it's like okay there's a fanon vs canon but these people I'm gonna be honest ESPECIALLY the one I blocked today has a embarrassingly bad habit of spewing just garbage nonsense about shit that doesn't exist like they fully believe it to be reality and there's just a gaggle of people who will follow as if it's actually true to life and I'm sick of it and it's not like I'm over exaggerating because this person takes it to gross extremes DAILY for literal years/months I've been seeing them write this delusional shit I soft blocked them blah blah broke mutual a long ass time ago as to not be rude (btw there r other ppl who think this exact thing im not be overdramatic i don't think???) but lately its getting stupid again so i just had to block them its so tiring reading that mess on everyones simple posts its just like at some point do YOU even like them? Or even the made up version of them? Anyways whatever I just couldn't deal with the endless batshit bad "takes" if u even can call it that it's honestly no big deal if everyone wants to hop on the fictional aspect of things and have fun! it's just that person I cannot stand anymore and haven't for awhile
#ask#lile honestly r u not embarrassed....like deeply...#i know the whole thing abt “keeping the peace” is holy in this fandom but i truthfully dgaf if a bitch gotta go a bitch gotta go LMAO#its actually very justified i reallt dont guveya damn#i dont have to tolerate shit i dont like so someone doesnt get sad about their shitty behavior lol
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Callum is so handsome I hope they reveal his father as the hottest man ever
#if he snatched sarai it means he was a catch like Harrow#callums dad Mullac we may see him in a flashback#if shes asian what if he was like european idk now i dont know where katolis is based of but it reminds me of europa ok#i used to think he doesnt remembers him but seeing puzzle house he does#holy shit thats so sad he had to mourn him oh my god#imagine being like 3 and losing your dad#wait that happens often in this damn series#tdp#the dragon prince#tdp callum#callum#i once read the theory of viren being his dad and i hate it thanks#doesnt make sense and callum is too good looking like no thanks
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// 4.7 archon quest spoilers
i hate doomed siblings. why the fuck would you give me this. im sad and its both of your fucking FAULTS!!!!!!!!!!
can you both just follow big bro caribert and get along already im sick and tired of being sad cuz of yall!!!!!
#tulip says#lumine#aether#bedtime story#its not as bad as i was expecting but holy shit im STILL SAD BRO#WHY !!!!!#at least we're close to the end ....#but not close ENOUGH#(spoilers)#when the name changed to lumine and she was like “ur the only one who calls me that” to aether I FELT LIKE DYING!!!!#I WANTED TO KMS !!!!!#AND THEN SHE DIDNT REMEMBER AFTER LIKE HE SAID UDHFGJDFDFGLSJKDJVSK!!!!#THE WAY HE GAVE HER A HEADPAT TOO AS HE SAYS EVERYTHING WILL BE GONE FUCK YOUU#i wanted to reach out beyond this screen so bad and hug her on aether's behalf ... or at least tell her.......#idk if she's better off not knowing or whatever but like. she needed a bedtime story of her own too damn ...#im just.#fuck doomed siblings#hyv why#im Sad
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/kinda vent?
why everytime i think i’m getting better in terms of mental health it gets even worse immediately
what did i do to deserve this
#like holy shit let me catch a damn break#uni gave us a week off to chill i have never been this anxious and melancholic like wtf#i have so much work to do i can t be sad come on
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Okay, so the bare bones are up for now! I'll polish everything up a little more in the coming days as I become more acquainted with F.lashpoint to get a feel for her character (aka make more icons). Thanks for following this lady and putting up with my awful blog hopping, hopefully gonna stick with this one for a while because that comic series is DARK, good lord.
#🃏 || musings#;; delete later#Feeling quite a bit happier already and the F.lashpoint series is pretty damn good ngl#I feel so deeply for Thomas and Martha holy shit#Words can't even begin to describe how sad the series really is#B.atman as a series is already full of feels but F.lashpoint oh boy#ANYWAYS we shall see how this turns out#Thanks everybody for following this mean old clown lady we are going to have FUN#Oh yeah don't expect much in the ways of shipping that's probably only to be a thing with paradoxbatmd
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HOLY SHIT WAIT I AM EXPERIANCING EMOTIONS
"FAIR ISNT A WORD WHERE I COME FROM"
#'FAIR ISNT A WORD WHERE I COME FROM'#THAT IS SO INCREDIBLY SAD AND HEART BREAKING HOLY FUCKING SHIT#I AM GOING TO GODDAMN FUCKING BAWL MY EYES OUT HOLY SHIT THAT LITTERALLY BROKE MY HEART WHAT THE FUCK#i know this is probably just a fun way for the writers to speed up lloyd growing up but like: It reads as metaphorical in a way too#like he was already being forced to grow up and sacrifice his childhood for the greater good#so just making that literal kinda just nails that point for me#god damn#god fuckign damn#'fair isn't a word where i come from'??!!!!#THATS SO INCREDIBLY FUCKING HEARTBREAKING HOLY SHIT#watching the ninja go
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being in the DS9 fandom, you'll discover there are so many ways for people to be wrong about julian bashir
#wow i don't like a lot of you#baffled at how a predominantly autistic fanbase can be so contemptful of autistic behaviour#buddies i think you're the ones who are cringe. see i cringe WITH julian not against him#and not even just that#theres the ''julian is stupid about everything that isn't medicine'' thing#fuck you that man is a starfleet officer and he's a genius. i saw him fix a console and i was genuinely surprised because of this shit#''julian is stupid'' ''julian is annoying'' ''julian is insufferable'' ''julian deserves to be bullied'' and so on and so forth#wow. i hate. all of you. and based on the way y'all talk? you guys would hate me too#oh and worst take of all. like on a moral level:#''julians parents were in the right for doing what they did. its natural for a parent to want to have a normal child''#and other such ableist takes. literally i have seen people like that#i saw somebody baffled by that ep being like ''what did julians parents do wrong. they helped him. what is julian upset about''#and holy shit. that is. so fucked up#besides all that. the way the fandom and the show is mean to julian pisses me off#Why Are His Friends So Mean To Him#i have this brain thing where i take criticism of julian bashir as a personal attack. its called autism#sometimes an autistic-coded character in star trek will say something the narrative has deemed as Wrong#and i can tell thats what im being told because i understand media language but im still baffled like ''Whats The Problem''#spock. data. seven. julian. and its like... actually guys its everybody else who is being weird and mean about this#i do find it a little sad knowing that if i existed on DS9 that o'brien and kira wouldn't like me. like damn. i like you guys#anyways i have a lot of the DS9 fandom blocked because they got me at risk of developing a wee chunk of self loathing. and i refuse#i wasnt raised to feel shame how dare you
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i don't think i'll ever get over how people treat kids that aren't good in school as worthless no matter what. "oh it can't be that bad" my guy idk how to tell you this but the last time i went to a normal high school the principal called me into his office to brag about how he failed me in all of my classes before the semester was even finished & i should quit while i'm ahead cuz i'm too stupid ("officially" diagnosed as such by a school counselor & a psychiatrist!!) to succeed. & this is considered normal
#''poor teachers!!'' yeah well at least they can fucking quit & go work somewhere else#''okay but times are different than when you went to school in the 1970's'' this was 2016 my guy. shut the fuck up#''well maybe you were a violent & severely misbehaving kid!'' i wasn't. i have ADHD & severe anxiety disorder & depression#my biggest crime was being too exhausted & dopamine deprived to do my homework#my dad talks about how he was treated in school & i'm like damn dude i went through the same exact shit#how is it that a majority of teachers & principals are still abusive power-tripping pieces of shit 60 years later#why haven't things changed#well actually the answer is simple & it's because they want disabled people to disappear#& if abled students that simply disagree with the way things are done get caught in the crossfire then that is acceptable#because anyone not fit to make billionaires a billion more dollars should just die!#anyways here are my original tags from that gravity falls post i just reblogged:#I know this is supposed to be an appreciation post but like. ''for being the ''dumb one'' he's surprisingly rational.'' seriously??#as ''the dumb'' but ''surprisingly rational'' one of my family this is THEE biggest misunderstanding & it drives me up the fucking wall#just because a person struggles in one area doesn't mean they're stupid & should be an irrational dumb dumb idiot baby holy fuckkk#sorry to OP but even when people try to ''appreciate'' stuff like this they can't help but throw in insults#simply because they genuinely believe that ''even though you're stupid you SURPRISINGLY act competent sometimes'' is a compliment#I'm less mad about this & more sad that this kind of shit is still so prevalent in 2024#both Stanley & Stanford are smart & competent & rational#they just show it in different ways & exceed in different (sometimes overlapping) subjects#this is normal for human beings but the big societal scam is that if you don't do it in the way Ford does then you're stupid & a failure#& being surprised that Stan is also smart & competent in his own ways is the biggest sing that you fucking fell for it dude#btw before i get @ ed for this. i WAS that kid#i was so much that kid the school actually diagnosed me with stupid & spiteful & i was told to quit while i was ahead (they failed me befor#obviously this is very personal for me but also i don't think people realize the language they use is on purpose & it's used specifically t#& it's still happening right now & that just. makes me wanna cry honestly#like why are people still surprised that people can specialize in something despite bad grades in school#you know. the thing we all know is literally rigged to either put you in jail or in a factory to make billionaires more money.#man sorry for the rant the original spirit of the post is super correct but like fuck HS grade-centric judging of people's entire character#Stan being able to defeat Bill is just not at all surprising if you were him or knew/know someone like him#or really paid any attention at all to the show while watching it
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Hey
I’m not dead, but I have just not had any sort of energy the last few days, literally feeling dead tbh. Major reasons were school and just wanting to relax after my trip to Mexico, and just did not want to do anything after. But I’m back again!
This is to the few mutuals that care
#yeyarants#I literally checked when I last posted and damn#sorry about that#also so many things have happened holy shit#for me personally#TGCF SEASON 2 IS OVER AHHHH#I’m sad#I can’t look forward to my Wednesdays anymore#except for the dub#but that’s almost over too#fuck#and the worst part is knowing what Season 3 is going to cover#time to get depressed#and CYL 8!#right?#idk but I’ll post my poll of it on a separate post#svsss season 2 when? I’m holding out hope for it#and holding out hope for immortality eternal faith and winner is king#they have to come out this year or else#I’ll get back to posting I promise!#and idk if I want to post my reactions to TGCF season 2#I feel it’s a bit to late for that now
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GUESS WHAT I GAVE MY FINAL LESSON TODAY, I'M FREEEEEEEEEE
#random stuff#me#sad thing was I liked the students#but damn I need to graduate#I'm so relieved holy shit
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i came home, panicked about one thing, and my toilet was leaking. bathroom floor is covered in water and brown particles. oddly, this has not improved my mood
#i just want to be a child again. i understand being a child was also miserable I am not glorifying my childhood#i was in pain and sad and lonely#BUT I WAS SAFE AND CARED FOR AND I NEVER QUESTIONED THAT no matter how much pain I was in#what I wouldn’t give for everything to hurt because I was so overstimulated by school and being bullied#being a kid had such clear cause and effect. being an adult is just…I am guilty and I want to cry everytime I think about the fact that I’m#here. i miss something that never existed and I’m the only one who is trying to remember a person who never existed but is important to me#(cause it’s me—I’m the only one who cares about preserving my childhood. my parents don’t give a damn. they were so busy surviving they#don’t remember it or care either)#why the fuck am I getting emails about a pizza party we didn’t ask for were an actual club now we don’t need your planned events fuck off#the way I was about to brag about our club name by just name dropping my school which would then make it so easy to find me holy shit my#internet safety is getting lax 🙈#boom’s bad days#omg I just got reccommended ‘boom blogs high’ what if I got high I would feel so much better#i keep just coping sober cause like. not relying on substances. but I don’t actually have skills rn to improve my issues so like. substances#are more helpful tbh 🙈
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i finally read the lyrics for "honkai world diva" and
#guys what the fuck alsdkfasdlkfahlk#ITS A BANGER SONG BUT THE LYRICS ARE SO SAD IN RESPECT TO MEI'S CHARACTER ARC DURING WHAT THE HELL#'the diva who gave into lament' girl ok what if i just melted and vanished from existence what the hell is this#I CAN HEAR THE VOICES OF THE PEOPLE I MISS IN THIS SONG#(SHAKING MEI) STOP IM GOING TO CRY HARDER#also found the live version of the song from the dream euphonia concert holy shit does the singers voice do it so well in live damn im-#'I WOULD TREMBLE JUST TO HOLD THEM ONCE MORE'#is2g when i go back to play honkai some more and we come back to world serpent mei im just going to start crying and wailing#im actually kinda surprised how mei jumped up to one of my fave as fast as she did#like good on her because her character arc is really good#but also Q _Q everytime i think about it i am filled with a neverending sadness :(#because its half MEI NOOOOOOOO STOP YOUR FRIENDS LOVE YOU#and half mei for the love of fUCK STOP GO BACK TO YOUR LOVED ONES#aggressive care#avil plays hi3#but on top of that#having honkai world diva be the basis of the bgm of kyoden makes me feel even more pain#LIKE i thought it was a cool reference at first#until i realized the lyrics of it and now im like 'oh. acheron alone. :('#rolls around in pain#if youre wondering where i am story wise in hi3 im in ch 20?? starting fu hua arc stuff#hsr.... i have........ put on hold. for reasons. :D
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man, i wish The Good Place would've been more upfront about how the entire "soulmates" concept was literally just made up by The Bad Place for Michael's torture experiment. the show never outright acknowledges this, and yet, towards the end of season 1, a huge portion of the conflict and torture comes about through figuring out who likes who and the moral implications of confessing love and the expectations of love versus "dying alone" as it were. and i'm actually kind of frustrated they never brought it up again! the show takes soulmates as a real concept up until like...the series finale, maybe? if i remember correctly?
if only the show's creators had taken one teeny tiny step forward and been more overt about our society's views on love literally equating to torture. but alas, alloromantic folks will never take that extra logical step. alloromantic people accidentally imply all the time that, on some subconscious level, they understand that the societal weight we put on romance is oppressive and stifling. AND YET. it's still too scary for them to outright denounce romance, because it holds too much social and cultural weight (as both a concept and an institution). so that's fucking frustrating.
it's like...yes, you're literally so close to understanding the problem here, guys. im begging you to just make the connection and say it outright.
#anyways im on my tgp rewatch#i havent rewatched it since it came out#when i'd watch it weekly with my family :')#every tuesday night babeyyy!!!#and back then. well holy shit i think back when i was first watching (at least seasons 1 + 2) i hadnt realized i was aro yet. WOW#feels so so long ago huh?#and damn looking back on it...i really did feel a little sad that chidi and eleanor couldnt have been best friends.#or that the start of season 2 relies on their “I'll find you in every universe” connection or whatever. i felt uncomfortable about that for#some reason i couldnt describe#and now i finally can!!!! wow.#also: fuck it. AROMANTIC TAHANI!!!!!#the amount of pressure she puts on herself at the end of season one to try and feel attracted to chidi is very relatable to me at least.#babygirl i love you. live your life romance-free. you dont need it! <3#tgp#the good place#the good place spoilers#tgp spoilers#mine
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Watching Fullmetal Alchemist and I've had various reactions but like, seeing Shou Tucker's file in episode had me like: "Oh no-"
#and the episode hurt as expected#like i can see why this bitch gets on everyones least favorite anime characters lists#and why anime america said it was too obvious to put him on a worst anime parents lists#cause holy shit to what shou does#dude used his wife first time to make a creature and lied to nina that she left#and then ultimately uses nina and her dog alexander#not caring about all three at all in the end#simply comparing himself to ed and al when confronted#like damn at least he dead i guess#sad nina/alexander died tho cause like#i get scar's justifying it#because there's no way to undo what shou did and both's existence would be suffering in the end so its a mercy kill#but its still sad really
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