#his torso just singes off anything so hes like 'nah just let them hang out'

[wp100]

i honestly wonder if blizz didnt give bolvar a breastplate to wear because it's just easier to draw and animate a character without clothes on

[cjsinkythoughts]

A History Lesson

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader

Word Count: 4741

Warnings: Vulgar language, I think that’s it (it’s mainly fluff like Bucky’s)

Summary: You never were fond of history...but if history gives you a man like that? Maybe you could deal with it.

A/N: Here it is! A little later than I had hoped, but my brother is visiting, it was his birthday this week, work’s been a bit hectic, and I ended up writing a little something for Bucky’s birthday on Wednesday, which I didn’t mean to. I got it done, though! First Date with our dear Cap’n Spangles! I have all the First Date ideas for the other Avengers lined up, but I think I’m gonna put this on hiatus for now. I’m gonna try focusing on my College!AU at the moment. If you guys want, I’ll share my First Date plans, though. If I find time, I’ll write the next one. If you haven’t noticed, I have a fondness for collages, so I might do what I’m doing for my College!AU Project and make collages for the other First Dates before writing them. Anyways, enough with my ramblings. Enjoy the date!

You keep checking the clock, waiting for this lecture to be done. You typically enjoy school, but history isn’t a strong suit for you. You try in history, you really do, but all the information - the dates, people, places - it’s too much. You constantly mix things up, no matter how hard you study. And you don’t really get the hype. Who cares what these dead guys did? It happened, it’s done, and it’s time to move on.

“That’s all for today! Don’t forget your papers are due on Monday! You’re dismissed!”

You let out a groan at the mention of the cursed research paper. You had stayed up for hours the previous nights working on it, but so far you have squat. The essay is on the Second World War (more specifically the differences of life between Americans and Europeans at the time), and you know you should’ve done it when it was given a week ago, but your shitty memory makes it difficult to write a paper without five million textbooks in front of you and you don’t have time to go to the library every night between work, friends, and other projects. So, you haven’t done it yet.

Exhausted, mentally and physically, you collect your things and head out of the lecture hall. You pull out your phone to text your friends, telling them you have to work on a paper tonight and you can’t meet up for dinner like you all usually do on Fridays. Deciding to take a breather before working, you start out to the bench overlooking the Potomac River, which you always sat at to relax and just…be. The scenic walk through DC and the sight of the steady river flowing besides the busy city always calms you. 

You sit there for a few moments, letting the slight breeze chill the skin that’s warmed by the sun, listening to it ruffle the trees. The blush pink blossoms that appear when Spring sings her song and chases away Winter flutter to the newly grown, bright green grass below. You enjoy all the seasons, unable to help but love the unique beauty each brings, and Spring is no exception, despite the allergies and tests she brings.

And speaking of tests…

A soft sigh passes your lips as you get out your laptop. You might as well start writing, or at least researching, that paper. You never were good at relaxing when there’s work to be done.

You’re so engrossed in getting the stupid essay done and over with that you don’t notice the jogger who pauses in his run by the very bench you are slaving away on. “Savin’ this seat for anyone?”

“Huh? Oh, uh, no. Go ahead.” You answer distractedly, not even looking up from your screen as the owner of the deep voice sits besides you.

A few more minutes pass in comfortable silence, before you ruin it with a grumble and delete half the paragraph you just wrote. “That doesn’t make sense.” You change tabs to look over the information on the page you have pulled up again, only to furrow your eyebrows. You’re pretty sure the information is wrong. You may have a shitty memory, but you’re sure that the information given on this page is in contrast to the information given in the book you were reading a couple days ago.

“What’re you workin’ so hard on there, honey?”

You let out a huff, throwing your hands up in the air in defeat. “Some dumb research paper for school! It’s on World War Two, and I can’t remember what’s right and what’s wrong and it’s a stupid topic anyways that my stupid teacher assigned! Who fucking cares about a hundred years ago? And how the hell am I supposed to know this? I wasn’t alive! You know what I…”

The words die on your tongue as you finally glance over at the stranger keeping you company.

Blonde hair that seems gold with the way the sun is hitting the strands, which are damp and in slight disarray due to his exercise. Bright blue eyes reflecting the sky above, hidden beneath long lashes that you’re immediately envious of. Pretty pink lips, matching the cherry blossoms on the trees surrounding you, pulling up into an amused sort of smile. The makings of a beard lining his jaw and littering his cheeks.

Steve Rogers. Captain America. You just ranted about how stupid history is to Captain fucking America. You just ranted about how you have to write a dumb essay on World War Two to Captain fucking America.

Ignoring the way your body heats up, starting in your toes and climbing up your legs, chest, and neck to reach the tips of your ears, a nervous little chuckle is all you can give. You clear your throat, trying to think of how to apologize. “I guess you wouldn’t know what I mean, huh?”

What in the ever loving fuck was that? That was not an apology!

You clear your throat and try again. “I-I mean…sorry. It’s not - I didn’t mean-”

“No, no. It’s fine, sweetheart.” The grin he shoots you makes you glad you aren’t standing up, knowing full well your knees would’ve buckled if you were. You open your mouth to apologize again, but he shakes his head before you can speak. “Really. It’s okay. I get it. I used to be a student too. And you’re right; it was a long time ago and there’s a lot of things that happened. Even I have a hard time keeping track of everything that went down.”

You merely blink at him, nodding slowly. Say something. For the love of God, please just say something. Anything! “Yeah. I can barely remember what I had for breakfast this morning.” Really? You’re sitting besides the one and only Captain America and that’s what you decide to say?

You feel yourself slump your shoulders slightly, trying to shrink down into absolute nothingness. But even that wouldn’t work because he’s got that friend of his that could shrink and he’d find you. It seems that you were destined to be embarrassed in front of one of the most beautiful human beings on the planet. Screw the universe.

Instead of teasing you or embarrassing you further, he chuckles and nods in agreement, his eyes lighting up. “You’re not the only one. My pal Clint has got the absolute worst memory. We tease him all the time for it. How he became an agent with the memory of a goldfish, I’ll never know.” You laugh at that, your muscles relaxing and your anxiety easing up.

“Yeah, well, I’ve gotta get through college before I’m in the clear.”

“Don’t worry about it, honey. I’m sure you’ll be fine. Uh…so, a World War Two paper, huh? Need some help? I’m kind of an expert on the topic.”

Breath hitching as he scoots closer, you swallow thickly and shrug. “I don’t want to bother you. You look like you’re in the middle of a run.” You gesture to the tight ass t-shirt hugging his torso that you’re sure is sizes too small for him and the joggers hanging off his hips.

Following your gesture, he looks down, before shaking his head. “Nah. I’ve already ran a few more miles than I was going to today.”

“Are-are you sure?”

There’s that grin again. You’re not sure you’ll be able to survive him tutoring you if he keeps  giving you that adorable toothy smile. “Honest. I’ve got the rest of the day. We can go to the library if you want. Or we can stay here. Whatever works best for you. I don’t mind either way.”

You blink again, like an idiot, as you process his words. Whatever works best for you. What a gentleman. “Uhh…I was about to head to the library anyways, but I really don’t want to bother you-”

“Trust me, honey. It’d be my pleasure.”

“If you insist.”

“I do.”

You let out a soft laugh and nod at his insistence, starting to pack up your things. “Okay. I’m Y/N, by the way.” You stand up as he does and offer your hand.

“Steve. But I guess you figured that out.” Taking your hand, you expect him to shake it, but he squeezes it softly and brings it to his lips instead.

Clearing your throat, you tease him a bit to hide your bashfulness at his actions. “You’re a real gentleman, aren’t you?”

He shrugs with a slight smirk, gently dropping your hand and letting it go after another squeeze. “My momma raised nothing less.”

“I’m sure she’d be proud.”

His playful eyes go slightly more somber at that, his smirk morphing into a grateful smile. “Thank you.”

Giving no reply, you smile softly and nod your head to the path. He nods back before quickly falling into step besides you, asking you more about your paper as you walk to the library.

* * * * * * * *

Giggling behind your hand to stay quiet, or at least attempt to since you both had already been berated by the librarians for being too loud, your attention is once again diverted to Steve and his stories.

It started out fine; he helped you find reliable books and told you which things were true. But not even half an hour passed before Steve told you a story about the Howling Commandos after something in a book reminded him of it. Your concentration since then has been split between your paper and Steve’s retelling of his past.

“Sorry. I keep distracting you. What’s next?”

You snicker again and shake your head. “No, no. It’s okay. I’m almost done anyways. I’ve actually written down a few things you said, if you don’t mind me using them. My professor can’t exactly argue with Captain America, now can he?”

His lips pull up and his shoulders shake in silent laughter. “I guess not. Of course I don’t mind. You can quote me anytime. See?” He nudges you with his shoulder playfully. “History isn’t so bad.”

“Not when you’re telling it.” You respond earnestly, grinning up at him.

“Eh, Bucky’s always been a better storyteller than me.” He gives a little shrug and rubs the back of his neck.

You shake your head at his modesty. “Well I think you do just fine. You’re the first person to get me interested in history. Hey, can you read this over for me? I just need to finalize this paragraph and do the conclusion.”

When you receive silence as an answer, you look over at the blonde with an eyebrow raised. The ocean eyes scanning over you make you a bit self conscious, so you shift slightly in your seat, making him come back from whatever thoughts overtook his mind. “Sorry. Of course I can, honey. That’s what I’m here for. Let me see.”

He gives you a few pointers on what to add and what to get rid of, before you finally finish, saving your work and closing your laptop with a huff. 

“What a mind workout. I’m sure my brain’s got abs now.”

Heads swivel towards you two as Steve guffaws, a lady a few tables down shushing him. He apologizes, still snickering. “Abs, huh?”

“I mean, not as good as yours but…” You freeze, inwardly facepalming. And you were doing so well.

He gives you a cheeky grin. “I’ve got good abs?”

“Oh don’t give me that!” You hiss out quietly. “You know you have good abs. I’m just stating facts is all.”

Another soft chuckle leaves those pretty lips and he twists in his seat to crack his back before standing to collect the books you both got out. “When’s the paper due again?”

You stand to help him, but you get a case of the butterfingers just as you go to pick the books up, making the pile tumble to the floor. “Ah shit.” Steve smiles gently at you as you huff and give him an exasperated look. “My bad.”

He snickers, bending down to help you despite having his own books to carry, like the gentleman he is. “So? Due date?”

“Monday.” You answer with a sigh, straightening up. You carefully set the books on the table to pile them better. “We should get the grade back by Friday.”

He hums, taking a few more books in those strong arms of his. “Ah, well, you’ll get a good grade. I believe in you.”

You smirk at him as you shift your bag so you could carry books under your arms. “I’m sure I will with your help, Captain.” He scoffs and rolls his eyes at your teasing manner. “Thank you, by the way.”

“Of course. I had a good time.” He sends that stunning smile your way and this time you are standing. Luckily you have a table to lean on casually instead of falling on your face. “Plus, now you’ve got a free weekend.”

“Ugh. I wish.” You shake your head. “This is my final semester before I graduate. There’s loads to do. But this makes it easier.” Heading through the aisles of the library, you catch sight of the time on a clock on the wall and your eyes widen. You’d been there for a little over three hours! “Damn! I’m sorry I took up your Friday, though. I’m sure there’s things you want to do before you have to go back to New York, huh?”

Shrugging his broad shoulders, he runs a hand through his golden locks and drops the books he had in his arms on the desk for returns. “Not really. I’m here for the next couple weeks, actually. Meetings and stuff. Plus, it doesn’t even take me an hour to get here, so I can really come whenever I want.”

“That’s nice.” You follow his lead and set your books down, readjusting your bag on your shoulder. “I wish I could go to New York whenever I want. I’m way too poor for that.”

He chuckles again. You’ll never get tired of the sound of his laughter. “I’m sure you’ll get there one day.”

You shrug half heartedly, not really believing him. You’re barely making it in DC. There’s no way you could make it in the Big Apple. “Sure. Someday. I’m serious, though. I’m sorry you wasted  your time with some stressed out college student instead of enjoying time with your friends.”

“I’m serious too, honey. It’s no problem; I enjoyed it. And it’s not a waste of my time. Not as long as you get a good grade.”

You laugh as the two of you head out of the building, stopping on the steps and facing each other. “How will you know if I get a good grade?”

He purses his lips in thought. “Meet me at the bench next Friday.” He finally said, his eyes sparkling. “Then we’ll see. Until then, Y/N.”

You grin, taking the large hand he offers you, firmly shaking it before he can kiss your knuckles, making him snicker. “Until then, Steve.”

* * * * * * * *

Feet pounding against the concrete, you practically jump when you spot the man already sitting at the bench. “Steve!” You shout happily, waving your paper in the air. The blonde shoots up, a brow raised in curiosity. “I got a 97!”

You come to a halt in front of him, but it’s too quick, so your clumsy feet trip over each other. Before you can fall, he catches you with ease, smiling down at you in amusement. Small pants leave your lips as sweat trickles down your spine. Where’s that breeze when you need it?

“Uhm…oops?” What the hell was that?! That was embarrassing, that’s what it was!

He chuckles, straightening you up. “You were saying?” 

With pride lifting up the corners of your mouth, you shove the paper at his chest, once again grateful that he ignored your blunderings. “97%!”

“I told you you’d be fine. And I knew it wasn’t a waste of my time.” Steve looks up from the paper to give you a toothy grin.

“Thank you again.” You take the paper he hands back to you and shove it in your bag. “I probably would’ve failed the class without this grade. Is there really nothing I can do to pay you back for your time?”

He taps his chin in faux-thought, before tilting his head innocently. “You can loan me some of your time on Sunday.”

You purse your lips, confusion written over your features. “My time? On Sunday? Oh!” You light up, figuring he just needs help with something. “Yeah, duh. Okay. What do you need help with? I can promise I’ll try my hardest, but I might not-”

“No, no. Honey, that’s not-” he laughs, shaking his head and grabbing your hand to make you stop rambling. “I’m askin’ you out.”

“Out?” You pause, registering what that meant. “Like…on a date?” Is he serious? There’s no way he wants to go on a date with you. You pretty much called his life story boring, to his face, and then made him spend three hours on a Friday evening at the library working on a college paper with you.

He snickers with a nod. “Yes, on a date. So whaddya say, sweetheart?”

“Yes!” You blurt out without thinking, before you shy back, feeling yourself heat up as you tend to do around this God of a man. “Y-yeah. Yeah, I’d love to. Sunday. I can do that.”

He beams adorably, like a child being allowed to buy his favorite candy bar. Or a puppy with his favorite toy. Yeah…he reminds you of a puppy. Which only makes him that much cuter.

“Awesome! Meet me here at noon. Does that work?”

You nod vigorously. “That works perfectly.”

“Perfect.” He repeats, before taking your hand and bringing your knuckles to his lips once more.

* * * * * * * *

You’re sitting on the bench, tapping your toes nervously and checking your phone every minute. He said noon and it’s only eleven thirty. It’s a bit inconvenient, to say the least, when the place you go to relax is the place you’re meeting the person making you anxious. You could barely sleep the previous night, too many doubts lingering in your head. You seem to always be making a fool of yourself in front of him, but he was the one who asked you out, so that had to count for something.

You try not to think too hard about it, instead thinking back to last Friday in the library and how his features lifted when he told stories of his childhood and the Howling Commandos and the grin he got when he told you about the things they used to do that would get them in trouble.

“But I’m Captain America, and who’s gonna say no to this face?”

A little giggle leaves your lips as you remember his words, before you’re startled back to reality as a familiar smooth voice sounds besides you.

“Whatcha giggling at, honey?”

You whip over to see Steve grinning in amusement, leaning on the back of the bench. Your eyes drag down his figure. Another too tight t-shirt showing every ridge and curve on his torso, a jacket over his broad shoulders along with a casual pair of jeans. You had seen a meme about Steve having the proportions of a Dorito and, looking at him now, you can see how true it was. It almost makes you laugh again, but you remember what exactly is happening, and you suddenly can’t find anything funny.

“Sweetheart? You alright?”

“Huh? Oh. Yes. Yeah. I’m fine. I was just…thinking.”

He raised an eyebrow, smirking and leaning his forearms against the back of the bench next to where you’re sat. “And those adorable little giggles?”

There’s that familiar flush that you’ve learned to ignore, praying to God he didn’t notice your heart skipping a beat. “Uh, I just remembered something. That’s all.”

He gives a little hum, before hopping over the back and landing besides you. “Seems like we both had the same idea. Gettin’ here early.”

“If you must know, I was just…” You shrug. “To be honest, I’m a little anxious.”

“I’m not that scary, am I?” He teases, nudging you gently.

You roll your eyes and give him a look. “I don’t think there’s a bone in your body capable of being scary. I’m just…I’m nervous I’m gonna embarrass myself…again.”

Steve shakes his head, looking at you earnestly. “You’re not gonna embarrass yourself.��

Picking at the hem of your shirt, you scoff, shaking your head. “I already have. The amount of times I’ve tripped or said something stupid or rambled, which I’m doing right now, or-”

“Honey, honey. Slow down.” The blonde chuckles. “It’s nothing to be embarrassed about. I find all of those things endearing. Now, the amount of times I’ve seen my teammates slip and fall on their faces while chasing an enemy? That’s embarrassing. Just the other day, Buck tripped on the roof of a car. Sam has it recorded.”

You let out a laugh at that and nod. “Okay, okay. Sorry. I didn’t mean to get all insecure on you-”

“It’s fine, Y/N.” Steve insists. “Now,” he stands and offers his hand. “Let’s go get some lunch, yeah?”

You look at his hand before looking up at him and taking it without hesitation. “Okay.”

* * * * * * * *

After rounds of questions during lunch, Steve took you around the Smithsonian to all the different museums. Just like history, you had never been overly fond of museums. You typically walked around for a little bit, never really reading the information, only enjoying the pictures.

It’s different with Steve. Just like how it was different writing the research paper with him. He makes everything interesting, telling you his own facts and stories. Especially once you get to his exhibit in the Air and Space Museum.

Once you arrive, he puts on a hat and ducks his head, trying not to bring attention to you both while on a date. You tease him a bit, swinging your linked hands as you walk in with a cheeky grin. He nudges you with his elbow, his own smile painted on his lips.

You can’t help but listen and hold onto his every word, as if you’d die if you forget a single sentence. The light in his eyes as he talks about his past, showing you the pictures and plaques excitedly. Like a child during show and tell, he’s practically skipping from exhibit to exhibit, dragging you along behind him.

Giggling at his elation, you eagerly, and with no resistance, let him take you through his story. “They keep updating it.” He explains as you leave the area with World War Two and the Howling Commandos, entering through a corridor with modern pictures of him and the Avengers. “Every couple years or so they call me and tell me they’re adding another thing.”

“Doesn’t that get annoying?” You wonder, reading a wall about the Battle of Manhattan with interest. “Your whole life being put on display for everyone to see?”

Steve shrugs. “I dunno. I’ve never really minded. They don’t put in personal things, so it’s not too bad. You could learn more from the internet about me.”

You nod, knowing how true that really was. “You’ve got a point. Still. It must be a bit weird being a national icon.”

“I’ll admit, people stopping me on the street is getting a little old. I used to wish to be someone who changed the world. Now I have and sometimes I wish I could be normal. But I wouldn’t change what I’ve done. Who I am. Not if people can learn from it. Not if I can keep people safe.”

Turning away from the wall to glance at Steve, who has his hands in his pockets studying the wall, you smile and tilt your head. “You’re a good man, Steve Rogers.”

He turns to you, his lips pulling up. “That’s all I hope for.” His voice is quiet, earnest, before it becomes lighter as he gestures back to the wall. “You know the first thing we did after winning was go out for shawarma? It was Tony’s idea.”

“No way.” You laugh. “All six of you?”

“Yeah! We go there for every Battle of Manhattan Anniversary, now. I’ll take you some time. It’s a nice place.”

“Is that a promise?”

He smirks at your teasing tone. “Absolutely.”

* * * * * * * *

After your museum hopping, he takes you to Arlington Cemetery to show you a few friends and fellow soldiers he met all those years ago. It’s such a personal intimate thing that he shares, and you think you shouldn’t be there to witness it, but he’s quick to reassure you that’s not the case. That he wouldn’t have anyone else by his side, listening to his stories.

By the time you get back to the city, it’s getting dark, so you two head out for dinner before Steve takes you up the Washington Monument to look at the city lights. He makes sure you have the top all to yourselves; there’s perks of being an Avenger - especially one of the leaders.

“Alright, alright.” Leaning on the rail, you turn to him with a smile. “So maybe history isn’t as bad as I originally thought.”

“Yeah? I convinced you, did I?”

You roll your eyes at his smirk, shoving his shoulder lightly. “Maybe a bit. But only when you’re telling it. You think there’s any way you could come to history with me?” You joke with a laugh, feeling yourself flush at the chuckle and grin he gives you.

“I wish I could, honey.” He spoke softly, running a thumb over your knuckles. “Unfortunately, I’ve got work to do. I’m heading back to New York tomorrow. I’ll be back on Friday, though. If you would want to-”

You beam and nod energetically. “I’d love to go out again, Stevie.”

Giving your hand a squeeze, he beams back. “Fantastic.” He looks back out to the window and gives a little sigh. “It’s gettin’ late and you’ve got class tomorrow.”

“Yeah. I should probably get going. Do you, I mean, would you mind walking me home?” You blink up at him through your lashes hopefully.

“Of course!” His eyes - which you found throughout the day weren’t entirely blue, but had some green hues to them - lit up as you two start towards the elevator. He tucks you under his strong arm, pulling you close. “You wanna get ice cream or something on the way?”

“You read my mind, Captain.”

* * * * * * * *

By the time you reach your door, you’ve both finished your ice cream and he’s telling yet another story while you laugh, once again swinging your linked hands. 

When it comes time to say goodbye, you can’t help but wish your hand could stay in his for a while longer. Knowing that you’d be saying farewell, you hold on a bit tighter. “Pick me up on Friday?”

He nods, squeezing your hand before letting it go and brushing his fingertips along your cheek. “I’ll call you later too, alright, sweetheart?”

“Okay.” You agree eagerly. “You gonna kiss me goodnight now, soldier?”

“Yes, ma’am.” He chuckles softly, before gently grabbing your chin. Using his other hand, he pulls you closer by the waist, pressing his lips to yours. It’s soft and sweet and perfect, just like him, but it ends too quickly for your liking. He pulls back, nudging his nose against yours, and murmuring against your lips. “Sleep well.”

You smile, leaning your forehead against his. “Good night, Stevie.”

Stepping away, he lifts your knuckles to his lips. “G’night.”

You stop him before he could turn all the way. “Steve?” He pauses to look over his shoulder at you with an eyebrow raised. You have a question, and you can’t help but ask it, it having been on your mind for days. “Why’d you stop your run just to sit by me?”

“And leave a beautiful dame like yourself before I could get your name? I may be a super soldier, honey, but I’m still a man. Abyssinia Friday, Y/N.”

[serpentinesarang]

the rest is a secret

pairing: hyunjin (hwang hyunjin) x fem reader

genre: relationship!au, detailed smut

word count: 1983

content warnings: first-time sex (virginity can be implied if desired), unprotected sex (reader on contraception), mild swearing, lil bit of dom-y hyunjin

summary: it’s been three months with your boyfriend hyunjin, and he’s been patiently waiting to spice things up. when he accidentally encounters post-shower reader, he seizes the opportunity to do so.

a/n: requested by anon. thanks for your patience :)

♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤♤

I can’t believe he’s taking me somewhere special for dinner tonight! you squeal in your mind, wrapping up a hot shower. You wring out the remaining soap from your loofah before turning off the water and drying off.

You think back to the text from Hyunjin you’d woken up to: Dress up for dinner tonight... the rest is a secret. Have a good day, baby. Sighing with delight, you wrap your hair up and go about your body lotion routine, making sure to use the one Hyunjin had gifted you on your two-month anniversary. Might as well go all out... you think.

Just as you’re reaching for your face products, you hear a sharp knock at the door. It’s the middle of the afternoon, and you’ve got nothing on the agenda besides dinner with Hyunjin, so who the hell is trying to bother you?

With an exasperated huff, you throw on the thin robe hanging off the bathroom door and step into the hallway, but your heart nearly drops to your intestines as you hear the electronic beeping of your front door passcode being punched in. The keypad sings its little opening tune, and you’re too frozen with panic to process the door swinging open and showing none other than your sweet boyfriend.

Oblivious, Hyunjin closes the door behind him like business as usual then glances up and locks eyes with you across the way. His mouth falls ajar, his spine shifts up, and he stops himself from getting closer.

“Y-you gave me the code last week... Remember?” he asks in a soft, almost scared tone. 

You let out the breath you’d been holding this whole time, your hands uncontrollably flying up to fist your hair out of sheer relief. “Yes!” you reply breathlessly. “I just... forgot about it, I guess...”

Smiling, Hyunjin pads over, stopping a few feet before you. “You freaked me out with that look on your face, baby.”

You pause for a moment, still trying to piece together why his presence doesn’t quite feel right. What’s he doing here before dinner? He’d disappeared after that text anyway, so you’d figured he was just gonna spend the day working.

“I’m sorrrry,” you chuckle sheepishly, bouncing a heel against the floor. “I wasn’t expecting to see you for, like, another hour or two.”

Hyunjin takes your hands in his, thumbs stroking your knuckles. “This was part of my plan: surprise you before dinner.”

Oh. Shit. He did explicitly allude to that in his text this morning.

“Well, I’m glad you’re here then,” you reply with a sweet smile.

His eyes do that adorable crescent moon thing as he matches your grin while squeezing your fingers in random patterns. “Dork. You smell good, by the way.” 

Then his eyes flick downward to the white robe you’d haphazardly tied around yourself. This is the first time in your relationship that he’s seeing you wearing something more revealing than work or street clothes or pajamas. And he digs it a lot so far.

Resuming eye contact, Hyunjin asks with puppy-dog eyes, “Did I interrupt anything?”

Missing his well-veiled insinuation, you answer, “Not at all. I just got out of the shower, actually.”

Dropping your hands and instead placing his on your waist, Hyunjin says in a hushed voice, “Do you know how sexy you look right now?”

You gently grasp his forearms, feeling a tingle of excitement course through your nerves. “No... Tell me more.” You stare up at him with growing determination, your intuition screaming that this is a make-or-break moment, and god are you ready. Three months of just making out and dry-humping is torture.

“Nah,” he murmurs before craning his neck to plant a long, deep kiss on your lips. He pulls less than an inch away, his lips literally still atop yours. “You already know.”

At that, you cup his cheeks and mash your lips back together. A pang of desperation flashes within your chest as he molds his torso against yours and wraps his arms around your back, so you part your lips to meet tongues.

You’ve wanted this since the one-month mark because you and Hyunjin just click, and the level of physical magnetism between you has always been unbearably high. He’s truly your best friend, more so than your few girlfriends. You don’t need to think this through because now it feels right.

A few moments have passed. Hyunjin has carried and plopped you dead center on your bed. Looming over on all fours, he bores his eyes into yours with a nearly palpable kind of lust.

“Do you want me to undress?” he asks.

You smile. “I don’t care either way, baby. I’m just thrilled this is happening.”

Hyunjin smirks before tugging off his hoodie (no undershirt, that lazybones) and coming back down to tenderly kiss you. You feel the knot around your waist loosening, but he only moves the robe off your chest. Oh so delicately, he palms the underside of one of your breasts while bracing himself with the other hand.

You whimper when he kisses a sensual, painfully slow trail down your neck, stopping near the top of your other breast to gently suck and kiss. Both hands greedily rolling your breasts now, he slithers back to your lips, being a little more careless this time around.

Feeling your hunger exploding, you undo his jeans and slide a hand in, grasping his throbbing, girthy dick. Hyunjin groans into your mouth and thrusts his hips deeper into your touch, begging you wordlessly. So you oblige by slowly pumping his shaft and snaking your free hand in and around to grab a supple butt-cheek.

“Baby,” he whispers between kisses. “Harder―please.”

Trying not to smirk too much, you grant his request, maybe just a liiiittle too much pressure, but you reason that he’s way too turned on at this point. You even pick up the pace to a steady rhythm, occasionally caressing that butt-cheek.

Still feverishly making out with you, Hyunjin emits a deliciously drawn out moan against your lips, and he switches to tenderly pinching your nipples between his fingertips, which causes you to moan too. Now you can feel the precum gathering on your palm.

“Jinnie,” you pull away, “I’m as ready as you are.” Your eyes dart down to his dark pink tip bobbing in and out of view then back to his flushed face.

“Good,” he breathes out. “’Cause I want you bad.” 

With that, he pulls himself upright, forcing you to stop pumping him, as he scoots down your thighs to move aside the rest of your robe, finally giving him what he wants: your nude, freshly showered body all for him.

You can see his eyes actually glazing over with desire as he shamelessly assesses you, his hands trembling over you as if he can’t believe this isn’t his nightly handjob fantasy.

“Hyunjin, why are you shaking? Are you nervous?” you ask, starting to doubt yourself.

“No, I’m so fucking over the moon right now I don’t know what to do,” he replies, a seductive airiness in his voice.

You pause, taking his words into consideration. “That’s okay, babe. Why don’t we take the rest off?”

Within seconds, your robe is chucked to the floor along with his jeans and underwear. You climb on top of Hyunjin and sit on his thighs, his beautiful erection lying like a stone against his flat stomach as he strokes your own thighs with his moistening palms. 

“Can I touch you?” you ask, doing your best to keep your excitement from bubbling over.

“Please touch me,” he murmurs with expectant eyes, bringing his hands to your hips.

With the pad of your index finger, you trace a line up his veiny shaft from the base, and Hyunjin loudly exhales when you graze over the sensitive frenulum. Now, you lightly run your dominant hand up his shaft, pausing to dig his tip in circles against your palm.

“You’re teasing me...” Hyunjin whines, gripping your hips even tighter in his big hands.

You smirk. “What should I do then?”

He simply burns you with a narrow-eyed gaze, either mentally swearing about how ridiculously hot you look on top or carefully choosing his words.

Completely flipping the situation, though, he overpowers you with zero struggle, barreling you both over so he can loom above you again.

“I’ll tell you what you can do,” he responds in a dangerously husky tone while he captures your wrists in one of his hands and roughly pins them against the pillows. “You’re gonna have the best night of your life,” he growls, knocking your legs apart with his knee.

And without skipping a beat, Hyunjin pushes into you with his other hand pressed horizontally against your abdomen to feel his length poking upward from within your flexible, very aroused walls. And it does, causing an uncharacteristically high-pitched yelp to escape your mouth.

Hyunjin freezes, bringing that hand to your cheek, still tightly clutching your wrists in the other. “Tell me when,” he whispers, eyes roving all over your expression of combined surprise and newfound pleasure.

You take this moment to push your chin up and open-mouth kiss him a few times before whispering your permission while he tries to palm one of your breasts: “Go, Hyunnie.”

Off he goes into a decent, far-from-slow pace, rolling his hips effortlessly into your wet core just enough to avoid slamming your cervix. Luckily for him, this is exactly where your G-spot rests.

“HYUNjin,” you huff as he adds more pressure to his thrusts, bumping into your spot every other second.

“What’s wrong, baby?” he asks in a breathy voice.

You can’t control your eyes rolling back in their sockets when he finally increases his speed, full-on hammering into your pussy now. “Nothing—oh fUCk—”

“Ohhh okay, that means ‘don’t stop,’” Hyunjin interrupts, looking at you smugly.

You regain control of your eyes long enough to meet his devilish expression with your own. “You can do better.”

The very millisecond his brain processes those haughty words, his eyes nearly boggle out of his skull before he laces his hands with yours and throws them down parallel to your shoulders. To sweeten the deal even more, he uses the same knee to slide under your thigh and push your leg up as far as he can press with his torso, which—at the marvelous new angle Hyunjin’s even harder dick is kissing your sweet spot now—sends you into your first vaginal orgasm.

Watching your chest uncontrollably convulse with euphoria, Hyunjin open-mouth grins out of both pride and arousal, pushing himself to let up on the speed but max out on pressure, definitely slamming your cervix with each purposeful thrust. At this, your own mouth flies open in a silent scream, and you struggle to keep your eyes open. 

“BabyIneedtocum,” Hyunjin groans in one mashed-together word before conjoining your mouths with messy kisses and tongue-sucking straight out of porn.

“I’m on birth control,” you sigh against his hair as he licks your neck. “Cum in me, Jinnie.”

You hear the most guttural, pussy-throbbing groan from him because that’s all he needs: your sexy, fucked-out voice (as if it wasn’t already naturally sexy to him) telling him to go ahead and paint your tight cave of wonders white. 

All in less than a second, Hyunjin releases your hands, wraps his arms around your body, presses himself against you with all the energy he has left, and digs his already pulsing dick as deep as possible. You’ve been unknowingly clenching on him this whole time in the wake of your heart-stopping orgasm, so he spends a good twenty seconds holding you, taken hostage by his own unbridled pleasure.

Panting as if he’d hiked five miles in the mountains, he pulls himself off of you, cups your flushed face in his warm hands, and says, “And it’s not even close to dinnertime.”

[dynyamight]

omgomg 11 for bkdk!!!!!

send me a writting ask

11. Both of you wore the same ugly Christmas sweater to a party

“I absolutely love it!” Ashido squeals in delight.

“I fucking hate it.” Bakugou growls, jaw clenched.

While Sero and Kaminari are hollering and wheezing on the floor, Kirishima gives a soft, supportive smile. “Look at you.” He says easily, “Now, you’re an actual star, Bakugou”

When he said he’s the fucking the star of their group, Bakugou did not mean it literally.

With arms spread awkwardly, Bakugou stood in the living room in the most gaudy green, Christmas sweater, fuzzy all over. There were faux garlands going across around his torso and arms, with red and yellow bells jingling from them. The muscles in his chest and arms that he once was so proud of, terribly helped to widen the entire tree look.

And, right on top of his head, Bakugou has his wildly blonde hair, tousled, spiked, and gelled by Ashido’s hands. It created to give an illusion that his own damn head, was the fucking star.

“I’m not going.” Bakugou relents firmly.

“No, no!” Ashido whines, hugging him around his back. “Please! You will totally win the ugly sweater contest at the party. And, you know we need that prize money!”

“You mean, you need that prize money, to help pay rent.” Kirishima deadpans.

Ashido pouts in his direction. “Me. We. Same thing.”

Sero heaves a tired laugh, wiping tears off his cheeks. “God, the way he’s just T-posing, without realizing.”

Bakugou raises a brow. “The hell does that mean?”

Kaminari cackles, still rolling on the carpet. “Nevermind that!” He barely voices between laughs, “His hair! His fucking hair!”

“Don’t mind those two.” Kirishima reassures Bakugou. He places a comforting hand onto his tense shoulders. “We’re all looking ridiculous.”

Which, true. Bakugou scans over his group of extras, finally taking in their dumbass outfits.

Kirishima was a red brick chimney, with Santa’s ass sticking out in front. Ashido had an oversized sweater, stating in bold letters, “FEEL THE JOY”, and silhouettes of hands on each boob. Sero wore Santa with obviously red eyes, hitting a blunt, and the words “GET LIT” in this nice cursive. And, Kaminari had red solo cups stuck to his sweater, a walking beer pong table, for fuck’s sake.

“We’re the absolute worst.” Bakugou snorts.

“I swear, if no one goes all out like us, I will feel personally attacked.” Ashido sighs, letting go of Bakugou. Instead, she looks over her phone. “I texted Jirou to remind her and her girlfriend to go big, or go home.”

Sero sputters in another fit of laughs. “M-Momo in an ugly Christmas sweater! N-No way!”

Kaminari snickers right alongside him. “Momo doesn’t even wear anything ugly to begin with!”

“Well, there’s a first for everything, tonight!” Kirishima laughs, shaking his head. “If Bakugou’s going out as a damn stumpy Christmas tree, so can she.”

“I’m fucking stumpy?” Bakugou asks. That’s not-

“Okay, chop, chop!” Ashido claps to the group in the apartment, speed walking in her knee high boots to the door. “To the party, we go, everyone!”

On the cramped car ride, Bakugou tunes out the atrocious caroling of his friends, blasting Kaminari’s Christmas classics playlist. There’s a long night awaiting him, and he’s borderline doubting he can survive.

He usually doesn’t go to these late night, drunken parties. That’s more of, well, everyone else’s thing.

Bakugou would prefer to spend Christmas Eve by his quiet self, avoiding anything Christmas related, in fact. Just a day off work, cooking a nice, warm meal and watching his favorite horror movies under a heated kotatsu.

Alas, his friends begged him to attend this ridiculous Christmas party, instead, hosted by the damn, annoying Aoyama, of all people. Though, he is surprised the guy had the gall to extend an invite his way.

And, yeah, maybe he hasn't gone out in awhile, and actually was willing to show up.

So, here he is. Bakugou Katsuki, readying himself in a small ass car to get egg-nogged-wasted for the Christmas cheer, or whatever they say.

Besides, Kirishima offered to give a ride back home, if two hours into the party he still wasn’t feeling it. That’s his best friend, for fucking sure.

After passing the gates, the car rolled through the private community and pulled up to Aoyama’s residency, shortly after. There wasn’t any parking in front of the house, heavily decorated with lights, inflatables, and a fucking snow machine.

“We need a group photo with that!” Kaminari exclaims in the backseat, face smushing the window. From the passenger seat, Ashido agrees excitedly.

So, Kirishima had to move up a few houses down, in order to find an available spot for his car. The walk was a bit bothersome, the nipping cold, winter air bites at everyone’s faces and noses. But then, Sero yells for a race down to the front doors, undoubtedly to help the group warm up.

Bakugou won’t lie, he totally ran out of breath to those damn doors.

They all waited patiently for Ashido, last and stumbling in her heels hurriedly. It takes Kirishima walking back, and ushering her with his arm, so she can rush over safely.

“Gross, they’re actually cute together.” Kaminari sticks his tongue. Sero and Bakugou roll their eyes.

When Aoyama greets them, he blasts the whole group with a confetti popper. “Merry Christmas! Happy Hannakuh! Happy Kwanzaa! Happy Holidays!” He sings aloud. He shakes his whole body, ringing the bunches of bells that are all over him.

Bakugou feels a headache forming.

“It’s Christmas Eve.” Sero corrects, right beside him.

“Ah, well, tonight, it’s all the holidays combined!” Aoyama laughs, “Now, get inside! The heater’s blasted on, of course.”

And, hell, at least the damn heater’s nice.

Bakugou eyes all over the entrance way, pictures of Aoyama and his family plastered over the walls, with large garlands hanging between them.

The loud commotion of the party echoes from the living room, to his left.

“Here, we brought some drinks!” Ashido gingerly proclaims, with both her and Kaminari handing over the bottles of whiskey to Aoyama. “The essentials, duh!”

“Please! You even got my favorite brand!” Aoyama gasps.

Kirishima coughs over Bakugou's ears. “Yeah, that shit was expensive.” He whispers.

“It ain’t even that good.” Bakugou hisses back.

They both smirk at each other, before letting out airy laughs.

Bakugou lets the rest of his group go in front of him, before stepping over to the living room. Seated and standing throughout, different, unfamiliar faces were gathered together. Groups had already formed; a dancing and twirling circle, a card game circle, a conversation only circle, a drinking circle, and even a circle surrounding the tall Christmas tree at the corner of the room.

It doesn’t take long for the group to split.

Aoyama pulls Ashido towards the rest of the girls, huddled around the fireplace, sipping on hot mugs of chocolate. Kaminari hurries to his tired eyed, purple friend, Sero jogs towards Sato and Tokoyami, and Kirishima is surprised (read: jumped) by Testutetsu and his friends.

Which left Bakugou still standing by the entrance.

He slowly trudges his way around the living room, eavesdropping on the different conversations, in order to see if that’s the circle he wants to join.

But, even after overhearing and eying at the last circle, Bakugou decides he doesn’t want to join any.

Kirishima better uphold his damn promise. Cause, this shit is boring as hell.

He doesn’t know what compels him to do it, but Bakugou decides to grab a drink off the long table of assorted drinks and finger food, and simply sit on one of the couches. Oddly enough, no one was seated over to where he was looking.

Taking a red solo cup of who knows what, Bakugou starts walking around the crowd, and hurries to the open couch.

And, just his luck, he bumps into someone right as he tries to sit down.

Luckily, neither his drink, nor the other person’s, spill. But, as Bakugou looks over to his right, ready to offer a curt apology, he halts.

Staring back at him, was a damn idiot, in the same ugly Christmas sweater as him. And, on top of his head, he wore a springy star, jumping in the air.

“O-Oh, sorry.” The freckled stranger voices, woobly smiling. “But, I think one of us has to change.”

“You need to change.” Bakugou states firmly, settling down close to the armrest of the couch.

The grinning guy seats himself next to him, thighs pressing together. “Well, I arrived here first. So,” He shrugs teasingly, “If anyone’s changing, it’s you.”

Bakugou huffs, taking a sip of the beverage in his hand and trying to avoid any further conversation.

And, instantly, he almost spits that shit out.

“What the hell?!” He blurts. The sweet, sugary flavor of the obvious vodka-mix coats all over his mouth.

“Yeah, I took a sip, and that drink is a little too sweet for me, too.” The stranger chuckles, shaking his head.

“Who fucking brought this?”

Bakugou hears the stranger hum. “If I had to guess, it was probably that Ashido I spoke with a while ago.”

“Hell nah.” Bakugou defends quickly. “We came together. I would know.”

“Really?” The stranger’s face lights up, in recognition. “Wait, are you perhaps her boyfriend?” He asks excitedly. “She did say he's the most attractive person in the room.”

Bakugou snorts. “Hell nah. I would never.” He throws a nonchalant toss of his head over Kirishima's direction, where he was talking to a group of other guys. “Her ‘attractive’ boyfriend would be Shitty Hair, over there.”

“Sorry, sorry!” Bakugou notices he fumbles with his own red solo cup, in between his scarred hands. “I— There’s just so many people here, I only know a few.”

“I don’t know anyone else, other than my close four.” Bakugou clicks his tongue, “Fuck, I guess close five. Jirou and I are cool.”

“Well, you definitely know more than me.” The guy chuckles, “I just know Aoyama and Ochako.”

“The hell? Then, why did you show up?”

“Designated driver.”

“..Fucking lame.”

The guy laughs out loud, and Bakugou enjoys the genuine mirth that slips through his lips. “I really was hoping my luck would help me meet people! But, uh, I guess it’s been a freaking lame night.”

Begrudgingly, not wanting to get up and grab a different drink, Bakugou willingly swallows down a gulp of Pepto Bismol. He lets out a quick cough. “Well, you met me.”

“..That is true.” He smiles back. “Pretty good luck I have, huh?”

“Bad luck.” Bakugou huffs, “It’s bad luck.”

“Oh really? Then,” The guy points at Bakugou. “Is your name Kyuu?”

Bakugou rolls his eyes, but is unable to hold back his laugh. “I’m not literal bad luck, dumbass.”

“Then you’re not so bad! I bet your name isn’t even that bad, either. Nothing is as bad as-”

“Bakugou.”

“Hm?”

Taking another sip, Bakugou looks back at those evergreen eyes. “My name.”

Those freckles scattered over his cheeks are covered by the red flush that slowly floods him. “Ah, m-my name’s Midoriya. Hi.”

“Hey.” Bakugou lifts his cup up. “Happy Holidays, or whatever.”

Midoriya smiles softly, before clinking his cup together with Bakugou’s. “Happy Holidays, or whatever. From one ugly Christmas tree to another.”

“Which, you seriously need to fucking change.” Bakugou reminds in fein resolve.

With a small push on his shoulders, Midoriya giggles, raising a quip brow. “Don’t start demanding, when your hair’s looking like that.”

"The fuck's wrong with my hair?"

"Everything."

Bakugou barks a laugh. "You got some fucking nerve. With your stupid dangly star."

"Perhaps, you could say our stars aligned, tonight." Midoriya shakes his head, blushing once more. He looks away. "Ah, sorry. That sounded way cooler in my head. Forget I said that."

Fuck. Fucking shit.

Bakugou blames it all on the Christmas energy, contagious and destroying him from the inside.

He blames the damn Mariah Carey that’s uplifting his own damn stubborn spirits.

He blames the smell of Gingerbread and Cinnamon, wafting in the air, and the toasty, cozy heat that wraps around him, snug.

Because, now his heart’s melting, over this damn idiot in the same ugly Christmas sweater as him.

[electrictoes]

Closer Than We Are

For @dailysvu's Amanda Rollins Week

Day 4:  Cuddling Characters: Amanda Rollins, Sonny Carisi, Jesse Rollins. Guest Appearances: Olivia Benson, Kat Tamin, Billie Rollins, Noah Porter Benson Relationship: Amanda Rollins / Sonny Carisi Warnings: None

Read on AO3

The first time that Amanda found herself cuddled up with Sonny it was almost 4am, and they were both exhausted.

Jesse had been teething and Amanda had barely slept all week, so when Sonny had offered to come over and cook dinner she’d gratefully accepted - just the thought of someone else being in the apartment with her was enough, the fact that he was also going to provide food that didn’t come from a packet was an added bonus.

They’d had a few late nights at work that week - Sonny and Fin had born the brunt, covering for Amanda so that she could spend time with Jesse, however little rest that actually gave her - so he was tired too, but when Jesse had started screaming after dinner Sonny had told Amanda to stay where she was sitting half asleep on the couch.

She watched bleary eyed as he brought Jesse out of her bedroom and into the living room, her screams subsiding briefly as she mouthed at the knuckle of his index finger; he was holding Jesse against his chest with his left hand while she chewed on his right and Amanda watched as he paced the room with her, trying to keep her calm and soothe her back to sleep. Amanda was grateful for his help; she was doing better than she herself would've predicted at this mom thing, but having another pair of hands never hurt. Jesse eventually settled against him and he carefully carried her back to her crib before joining Amanda on the couch.

They talked a little, but mostly they sat in a companionable silence, watching sitcom reruns from opposite ends of the couch. Jesse was back up an hour later, and when Amanda eventually settled her again and came back to the living room Sonny’s eyes were closed; his head tilted back against the couch cushions. “Carisi, you don’t have to stay.”

“Nah,” he said, opening his eyes again, “It’s fine, I think you’re in for a rough night, I wanna help.”

Amanda sighed, “You don’t have to.”

“She’s my goddaughter,” he said, as though spending his Friday night listening to Jesse’s cries was part of the job description.

Amanda didn’t know how many times they had been up and down with Jesse by the time the clock ticked over to 2am, but she had begun to move past exhaustion. Sonny was back to pacing the room, Jesse drooling over his shoulder as she cried, Sonny rubbing gentle circles on her back, singing off-key lullabies. “Rollins, I’ve got her - go to bed.”

“I’m fine,” Amanda protested; he shook his head but he didn’t argue.

When Jesse drifted off against his chest, he carefully sat down on the couch again, his hand on the back of her little head as she slept fitfully; Amanda watched Jesse move with the rise and fall of his chest, and she reached out to stroke Jesse’s cheek, to rest her fingertips on her daughter’s back.

The next thing she knew, Jesse was wailing again; Amanda blinked open her eyes and found her arms had wound around Sonny as well as Jesse; he was awake too - no one in a five block radius was sleeping through Jesse’s howls - but he didn’t pull away from her; he just smiled a tired smile over the top of Jesse’s head. Amanda didn’t move away either; she didn’t have the energy.

Sonny gently shushed Jesse, whispering to her; he lifted her carefully, moving her so that she was facing Amanda, and they sat there in the dim light of the TV, Amanda’s eyes on her baby girl, one arm still slung along Sonny’s torso, her head resting on his shoulder as Jesse reached out, touching a tiny hand to Amanda’s face, her whimpers dying down as exhaustion took her again.

Dinner and bad TV had kind of become a weekly tradition - sometimes Sonny would cook for them, and some nights, when they were both worn down by a difficult week at work, they would order pizza and the three of would them flop down onto the couch, Jesse between Amanda and Sonny, and they would watch cartoons or kids' movies until Jesse dropped off, her head leaning against her godfather’s side, her feet digging into Amanda’s legs.

One of them - usually Sonny - would scoop Jesse up eventually and tuck her into bed with a kiss goodnight. The TV volume would get turned down a little lower, the cartoons switched over, and they’d watch something - anything - that they didn’t have to care about.

It was comfortable, that time with Sonny - the groove they’d gotten into over the past couple of years. Jesse had spent her whole life having weekly dinners with Uncle Sonny, and Amanda had found a friend she would never have predicted when he walked into the squad room three years ago. They laughed together - a lot - and he never judged her about the big stuff (the small stuff, sure, how many times had he bemoaned her lack of decent cookware?); she didn’t feel like she had to stand on ceremony with him; he didn’t complain about the dishes in the sink, the laundry hanging up about the place - and he told her things about himself, normal, everyday things, and she found herself opening up to him too. Not about everything, but she shared things about her past, about her family, that she had always held back from other people.

Tonight, they were tired, and if her head dropped onto his shoulder while they were talking, it didn’t mean anything more than that. He’d put a documentary on and she wasn’t even too sure what it was about - so she closed her eyes for just a second, or at least she had meant for it to be just a second.

When she woke up her head was still on his shoulder, and her arm was across his chest; he was leaning into her too, one of his hands resting just above her hip, and she was so comfortable, she felt so safe, that she just closed her eyes again, sinking back into sleep without thinking about it too much.

When they woke again hours later, still intertwined, they shared a brief, slightly awkward smile as they pulled apart. Amanda wasn’t about it admit it, but she felt better rested than she had in a long time.

Sonny wasn’t at his desk when Amanda got to work, and he was usually there before her unless they made plans to meet for coffee or breakfast beforehand. She hadn’t seen him the night before, didn’t know what his plans had been, but for some reason his absence bothered her. She sat down at her desk and kept an eye on the door waiting for him to come in - an hour passed and there was still no sign of him, so she sent him a text - just a quick “you ok?” - she glanced at her phone periodically but the message status never changed to Read. The morning was quiet - both Liv and Fin were meeting with Stone for trial prep first thing, and Amanda was working her way through a backlog of reports in between checking her phone.

Two hours after she got to work, around two hours and ten minutes after Sonny would usually have put in an appearance, Liv walked in and approached Amanda’s desk. “Carisi’s out sick today,” she said, “Can you meet Fin at Mercy? We’ve just had a call.”

Amanda frowned. “Sick? Carisi? He’s like fifty percent hand sanitiser.”

“Yeah, I think it’s the flu, he didn't sound great on the phone.”

For the rest of the day Amanda’s mind was on Sonny; she’d sent a couple more texts but he hadn’t even read them, and it was so rare for him to get sick - she wouldn’t admit it out loud, but she was worried. When she got out of work she text her nanny to say she needed to make a stop on her way home, and she drove over to Sonny’s apartment with cold medicine and Gatorade.

When Amanda knocked on Sonny’s apartment door there was no answer; she called his phone but she could hear it ringing unanswered inside the apartment, which only served to increase her worry. Eventually she pulled out her keys, scrambling to find the key he'd given her for emergencies; she knocked twice more before opening the door, calling out his name as she entered the apartment.

She didn’t visit his apartment often; could count the number of times she’d been here on one hand, in fact - she wasn’t exactly comfortable in this space like he was in hers, and she felt like an intruder as she walked down the hallway, still calling out to him. When she reached his living room she saw him. He was lying on the couch, his feet hanging off the end in a way that would be comical if he didn’t look so utterly wrecked; his eyes were glazed over, his breathing unsteady, and it took him a second to notice her.

“Rollins?” he said when he spotted her - his voice coming out croaky and weak. “Why are you…”

“I was worried,” she told him, crossing the room and putting the back of her hand to his forehead - he was burning up. “You weren’t answering my messages.”

“M’fine,” he mumbled, “Just restin’.”

“I don’t think you are fine, Dominick,” she brushed his hair back from his forehead and he let out a noise somewhere between a whimper and a moan.

“S’nice,” he said, leaning into her touch.

“Where’s your thermometer?” she asked, “I know you’ve got one.”

“Somewhere,” he says unhelpfully. She moved away and he sighed, lifting a hand to reach out to her, “Don’t go.”

“I’ll be right back.”

Amanda still felt like she was intruding as she went into the bathroom, opening his medicine cabinet and making a point of not looking too closely at the contents - she found a thermometer easily enough and headed back out to the living room. She’d been gone barely two minutes, but he smiled like it had been a decade since he last saw her.

His temperature was 103, and she told him so. He frowned. “No, m’cold,” he said, disbelief in his tone.

“I’m sure,” Amanda said soothingly. It took several attempts to coax him into sitting up, and to find out that he hadn’t taken any medication yet, and another five minutes to persuade him to swallow the cold medicine.

She sat beside him on the couch, slotting in to the space he left when he sat up, taking a sip from the bottle of Gatorade she’d handed him. He dropped back against her a moment later, leaning into her, barely able to support his own weight. She swept her hand through his hair again as his head lolled on her shoulder.

“You should go,” he murmured into her neck.

“I’m staying until the medicine kicks in,” Amanda told him him, her fingers still in his hair.

“But the girls-”

“They’re fine,”she assured him, “they’re with the sitter.”

“I’ll get you sick,” he said; he sounded so miserable there was no way she’d leave him alone right now.

“So then you can return the favour,” she countered, and he gave in, letting his eyes drop closed, one arm coming to rest across her stomach as he drifted off to sleep.

It was a choice to curl up next to him on New Year’s Eve - there was still a lot that had been left unsaid between them, and this was one of those things - that closeness; just a little too intimate to be platonic, but skirting the edges of admitting anything further. She had a blanket draped over herself, and he had one arm on the back of the couch; she fit perfectly into the crook of his arm, her hands pillowed between her head and his chest. The TV was on, but they weren’t paying too much attention to it; she was content resting against him as she listened to the stories of his Christmas celebrations with his family; he already knew how her Christmas was, had heard it all in great detail from Jesse when he had face-timed them the day after Christmas; the noise and clamour of the Carisi family in the background, but his attention solely on the Rollins girls.

They were comfortable together, her and Sonny. They had been for a while. It wasn’t something Amanda had ever had before - not like this, and they were on the precipice, resting between friendship and something more, but she embraced moments like this, where they could be in their own bubble - whatever happened between them in the future, she wanted to keep having moments like this. That had been what she was thinking about when she’d drifted off, midnight still hours away.

If the Amber alert hadn’t woken her, things might have ended a little differently, but there was no awkwardness when she did wake up burrowed into him. She moved only enough to reach her phone, reading the alert, sitting up only when she knew she’d have to go into work - to leave the warm comfort they’d found here and go out into the real world.

He looked as disappointed as she felt - and she wanted to drop back down against him, ignore the darkness of the world they lived in - but that wasn’t an option, and she knew there would be other nights like this, other nights they would fall asleep together, still not quite giving in to whatever kept compelling them back to this spot, this thin line they were living on.

Now, when they’re cuddled up together on the couch, Amanda never needs to pretend it’s anything different - it’s not because they’re tired, and it isn’t because one of them is sick, and she doesn’t have to analyse every movement of his body against hers - this is just who they are now, this is just what they do.

It’s movie night again - but not just the two of them - Amanda’s calling it ‘family night’, after weeks of late shifts and early starts, no one getting to spend much time with their children or the people they loved - Fin had declined the invitation, told them he’d had a better offer - but Liv and Kat are here. Jesse, Noah and Billie are on the floor in front of the TV; Sonny had set them up with cushions and snacks and with the amount of sugar they’ve already consumed Amanda’s sure they’re going to crash halfway through the movie.

Amanda glances over at Liv and Kat as she slips into the space Sonny has made for her on the couch, his arm coming around her as soon as she’s settled. Liv smiles in their direction, but says nothing. Kat raises an eyebrow - but it’s playful; she’s happy for them too, Amanda knows.

She can rest her head on Sonny’s chest these days, smile to herself as he presses a kiss into her hair; she can wind her arms across him freely. She’s always felt safe like this - been able to fall asleep knowing he’s right there with her - but now she can admit things she’s held back - now she can admit that she doesn’t just feel safe in his arms; it feels like coming home - whether it’s on a couch surrounded by their makeshift family, or it’s in their bed in the early hours of the morning, or his arm around her shoulder while the girls play on the swings - it’s somewhere she always wants to be.

[whiskey-bumblebee]

Hello lovely! After 5 weeks of being trapped in the house I wondered if I could request a bit of escapism with some holiday romance with Pale? Many, many thank-you’s in advance!

Same here pal! Sheesh, I know I’m an introvert but 4 weeks of lockdown has been interesting to say the least! That said, I hope you enjoy this!

Jump

Pairing: Pale/Reader Word Count: ~2000

Pale tossed and turned for weeks over it, your first holiday together. Wanted it to be a surprise but a good one, didn’t want to fuck it up. Looked at Cuba, Puerto Rico, the Bahamas, even Alaska. You’d been working yourself to the bone recently, deserved some time off. 

There was a TV Pale walked past every now and again when he was working his ass off too, and sometimes he’d see some blonde on a boat, singing about the wonders of cruising. It looked a little bit like hell, being stuck on a boat that long, but once he started reading about it, it started looking pretty fucking good.

Entertainment on board, it wouldn’t be Broadway but hell, with your lips around his cock in the back row it didn’t matter, did it? All your meals cooked for you, buffet and fine dining options, sun loungers out on a deck somewhere, docking at a tropical island for the day and snorkelling, whatever you were meant to do on an island.

“Baby, do you gotta minute?”

“Mhm, what is it?”

“Could you get some time off work if you asked real nice? Just a week or so?”

“Probably,” You started to smile and walked over to Pale from where you had been doing your eyebrows in the bathroom. “And by probably, I mean yeah, I’ve been savin’ my vacation days.”

Pale pulled you down into his lap, kissed under your ear. “How’s a vacation sound then?”

“Sounds good, what do ya wanna do?”

“You,” Pale smirked. “I was just thinking I’d do ya somewhere different.”

You rolled your eyes with a smile. “Where have you booked?”

“Haven’t yet, wanted to check with you first and make sure you wouldn’t hate it or nothin’. You seen those big fuckin’ cruise ships that take you outta Miami?”

“Yeah,” You started to light up, getting all excited.

Pale stroked the side of your face. “How about one of those? Eatin’ and fuckin’ and swimmin’ in the bright sunshine all day. Sounded real nice to me.”

“Where to?”

“Jesus you ask a lotta questions. Don’t gotta be to nowhere, they started selling trips where you just sit and get fed and look out the window and don’t stop anywhere, but wouldn’t that be awful? Anyway the Bahamas or something, a day in Cuba, I think I’d like Cuba.”

“Baby, at the moment even Cubans don’t like Cuba,” You teased, played with your man’s hair. 

“Then we stay on the boat the whole day and fuck, go to shows, go swimming, dancing, whatever. Fuck if I care.”

But you could tell he did care, he’d gone to so much trouble to research all this for you. Knew all the answers to all your questions, had a million ideas about what the two of you would do.

“I’m in, should I pack?”

Pale smiled wide, wider than you’d seen in a while. “Yeah, pack.”

* * * * * * * * 

The flight had been fine, New York to Miami. Pale had rented a car so the two of you could drive around for a few hours before your ship left. Miami looked so alive, crawling with rollerbladers, men kissing men and all sorts.

“Fuckin’ hot as hell. Gonna jump in the pool just as soon as we get on the boat.”

“Same here. Do ya think I have to wear a top?” 

Pale glanced at you and you shot him a wink. 

“You better, Jesus Christ. Think I’d die of heat stroke and a heart attack at the same fuckin’ time. Wouldn’t even fit on my death certificate.”

You couldn’t help but laugh at your man, complaining even now, even here.

“Pale, I love you so goddamn much.”

“Yeah, yeah. Still don’t get it but I believe ya.”

You were quiet for a moment then, content to listen to the pop on the radio. Pale had ceded and let you play the billboard hits for an hour or so while you were driving. It had to be quiet but it made you laugh, seeing this tough grumpy man driving through the neon streets of Miami with Van Halen playing.

“Do you miss Miami?”

Pale was quiet, drummed his fingers across the steering wheel as he thought.

“Some of it.”

You nodded, knew if he wanted to talk about it, he’d keep going on his own.

“The coke here is cheaper, but the cops are all over it. Weather’s good but it gets boring. College kids all over the damn place sometimes. It’d be nice to see my kids more. Nice to have the beaches nice and close. You know, normal shit.”

You nodded and rested your head on his shoulder. 

“You wanna go and say hi to them while we’re close?”

Pale turned his head slightly to kiss your forehead. “Where do you think we’re going?”

You sat upright then, looked at him, surprised.

He smiled. “Yeah I wanna see ‘em. We only got an hour or so left so the missus can’t get too wound up, I’ll be in and out.”

“Am I... Do you want me to-”

“Nah, I’m gonna drop you at the mall if that’s okay. Don’t want you to see it, she gets pretty loud.”

You nodded and went back to resting on his shoulder. “You want anything?”

“Pack of cigarettes, don’t know what else we’re allowed to take. Maybe some Twizzlers.”

You wrinkled your nose. “That your holiday food?”

Pale hummed in affirmation. “Yeah. Helps me get rid of all the tension in my jaw ‘cos it’s like eating rubber.”

You smiled, picturing a younger Pale chowing down on a pack of Twizzlers, chewing real hard.

* * * * * * * * *

“C’mere, you’re gonna get all fuckin’ pink on your shoulders.”

“Pale do you got a timer set or somethin’? You’ve been at this every hour on the hour,” You teased.

“It’s hotter out here than it is in New York. You’ll burn easier, just wanna take care of ya.”

“What time do you wanna get dinner?”

“Maybe 6:30, show starts at 8 so that gives us time.”

You nodded, melted into Pale’s touch as he rubbed the sunscreen all over your chest and shoulders.

“Do you wanna go to the restaurant proper? I think it’s Italian or somethin’.”

You hummed as you thought of a basket of dinner rolls with fancy little bowls of butter, then spaghetti and pizza. 

“Yeah, sounds real nice.”

“Can you wear the blue dress? That one with the sparkly shit on it?”

You nodded.

“It’ll look real nice with the ocean and the lights and everything reflecting off ya. We could get a photo taken or whatever.”

“We can get it printed nice and big and hang it in the apartment. Can ya let me read my book for a minute, sweetheart? I’m dying to finish this chapter.”

“Alright, alright, I’ll stop being a menace.”

Pale picked up his own book, a thriller. You couldn’t help but let your eyes wander down his torso, following the trail of hair from his bellybutton to the band of his swim trunks. 

“You know, we might need to go back to the room for a snack,” You said under your breath. “Getting a little peckish.”

Pale glanced at you over his book. “Oh are we?”

You nodded and pulled your lip into your mouth. “Just let me finish the chapter.”

Pale shuffled a little awkwardly and draped his towel over his lap. 

You didn’t even have to look away from the pages of your novel to know what the sound of the towel moving was. 

“Go jump in the cold pool, you menace,” You teased.

* * * * * * * *

The show was great, the costumes were amazing even if the set was sparse. Pale’s hands had wandered more than you could admit without blushing. In the interest of time before the show, you’d skipped dessert. The 24 hour buffet would serve you well.

While you helped yourself to carrot cake, Pale made small talk with the chef dishing the hot food. 

“Shit shift, huh?”

The chef laughed. 

“New Yorker?” His accent gave his own origin away, and you could sense the rapport that grew straight away.

“Yeah, taking a bit of a break with my girl, wanted to get some sun.”

The chef nodded. “It isn’t a great shift but there are always a few schmucks who come for dessert after the show. Real nice to see the stars though, rather see the sunset than work through sunrise on breakfast.”

“Jesus fuck, you guys gotta be up at four or whatever to serve us assholes cornflakes?”

The chef laughed again, a hearty laugh, and you joined Pale, looped an arm around his waist. 

“Thanks for sticking around, sorry to be one of the post-show schmucks.” You said sheepishly.

“Nah, you guys ain’t got nothing to worry about. Nice to meet someone who actually sees me as a human fuckin’ being.”

Pale nodded in commiseration. 

“What do you do in New York?”

“Restaurant industry, actually,” Pale replied.

“No shit! That’s nice. Manhattan?”

“Yeah, 90 percent of the time. Hey, uh, odd favor to ask but any chance I could come into the kitchen and see what’s going on? Must be a helluva lot of food back there, industrial ovens and shit.”

“Yeah, of course man. Let me hook your girl up with some cream though first, cake gets a little dry this late.”

You smiled. “Thank you.”

 * * * * * * *

“Pale, it’s beautiful.”

“Yeah you are.” Pale swooped in for a kiss.

“Careful, sun’s making you all soft,” You smiled.

“Don’t you worry, I’ll be back to normal as soon as we’re back stateside.”

Pale lay out the picnic blanket on the sand. You smiled at the way the wayfarers sat over his nose. 

“So what’s in that bag of yours?”

“That guy I met the other night, the chef, he gave me a bit of bread and some fruit salad. He said it wasn’t enough to save to put out tonight so it would’ve gone to waste.”

“And this?” You laughed as you pulled out a bottle of champagne. 

“Thought you might like a mimosa or somethin’. Gotta stay hydrated.”

You sighed with a wide smile and lay down on the picnic blanket, soaking up the sun and the love you felt for Pale.

“Thank you.”

Reaching out with your eyes still closed, you fumbled to hold his hand. 

“He’s a nice guy. Might help him out with a job or two once we’re back.”

You hummed. “You getting nervous? All that talk about being back?”

“A little. There’s a reason I’m the top dog over there, I’m the only one who can keep that shit all happening like it needs to. Fingers in a bunch of pies and all that.”

“But you’re glad you’re here?”

“Of course sweetheart. Probably would’ve keeled right over if we’d stayed, I needed a break. Can’t say I feel any less tired with how often we’ve been fuckin’, but still.”

You laughed and swatted at Pale with your hat, then moved it back over your face.

“I checked with some of the crew who know this island and they said you’re all good to whip off your top, even out the tan lines. Locals don’t care.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah, so c’mon, roll over. I’ll untie ya.”

You half-heartedly rolled, enough for Pale to reach the strings of your bikini top.

“Don’t go gettin’ too excited,” You teased.

“Too fuckin’ late, I’m hard as a rock just from seeing you in the bikini.”

You laughed. “Pass me a grape or something?”

You stayed on your front for now, didn’t feel like showing off your tits to the whole beach just yet. Pale took a grape out of the salad and extended his hand over to you. With a deadly smirk on your face, you licked the sweet syrup off his fingers, then sucked the grape out of his grip.

“Baby, that ain’t gonna help my situation.”

“C’mon then, I’ll feed you one.” 

Pale’s eyes widened and you laughed as you pulled a piece of melon from the salad. 

He shook his head with a smile and bit the melon from your fingers. “You’re a terror.”

You laughed again and he couldn’t help but smile at the sound.

“What now?”

You glanced at him from under the floppy sun hat.

“Lovers of New York, Book Two: The Terror Goes Tropical.”

[sheilarice1]

Silver Death - Part 9

H-RR:

Setting up my surround sound system in the gym I remember to turn up the volume as high as it will go and then make sure that the door for the hallway is shut correctly.

After making sure that everything is ready or secured I start my music.

The music that's starts playing and is an old lullaby that Winter sung to me when I was new at the facility that I was originally placed in for experimentation.

Looking at the punching bag in front of me I close my eyes to concentrate for a few brief moments before re-opening them only to see the agent that shot my mother standing in the place where the punching bag occupied moments earlier.

I start to beat on the bag, and after a couple of minutes my hands start to get used to the feeling of them hitting something repeatedly so I stop, wrap them and start beating it again.

By the time Winter finds me the bag is ripped in multiple places and has blood covering some of its surface, but I'm still beating it. Widow and Captain have accompanied him this far and stop at the door when they see me.

My hands are covered in blood and dripping down my arms onto my torso,legs and the floor. My hair is messy and bloody from my hands running through it, and the gym floor has sand and fabric from the bag strewn across it.

When my music runs out of new songs and replays the first completely I turn around and notice them for the first time.

(Winters P.O.V.)

When I go to find Silver I literally bump into Natasha and ask her to come along, she comes obviously curious about what I was going to say at breakfast four hours ago.

Steve was about to go to the gym where Silver is currently so when we see him walking across the shed to the hidden door I stop him so we can go in together.

Not hearing any noise from the gym we remember that she has sound proofed it. Opening he door we are greeted by a song that would give most people nightmares, but sing others to sleep.

Тили-тили-бом (Tili Tili Bom)

The first time Silver heard this song she was still Jessica: a scared little girl that wanted her mother.

It was her first night at the first facility she was placed in.

When she wouldn't stop yelling and the guards were planning on going into her cell to beat her until she was quiet.

I had yelled for the girl to be brought to my cell, which the guards had happily obliged assuming that I would make her shut up. Instead I picked her up and started talking to her.

Although I can't remember the words that I had said I know that she started to quiet down. And by the time I finished talking she was just watching me playing with the seams in my metal arm.

I can remember her looking at me and being so quiet that I could barely hear her whisper "can you sing? I can't sleep without a lullaby." She was so quiet back then, before all the testing and torture.

When Silver spoke I stopped thinking of the past and payed attention to the present.

"It's one of my favourite songs. But it will always be my favourite lullaby."

"You were so small on the day I met you. You were just under five years old. And wearing a pink dress."

"I remember that day. I killed a room full of people. And then you picked me up and took me out of that room, holding me and patting my back as you did so." She seemed so happy with her words.

Natasha and Steve watch as we talk. Silver has noticed them but hasn't made the effort to include them into the conversation.

"What do you mean 'I killed a room full of people?' If you weren't even five and in a room full of HYDRA agents how could you kill them all?"

When Steve speaks up Silver contemplates what to tell them.

"I was born with the ability to turn invisible and the ability to control fire. When the agents put me in a room of weapons and told me to throw a knife at the target maybe ten feet away from me I hit the man standing beside it. So I got handed a sword. I turned invisible as did the sword. And all twenty-five soldiers in the room were dead. Until they sent Winter in.

He picked me up and walked me to my cell. And after a few hours of me yelling the guards were threatening to beat me if I didn't shut up. Winter had called for me to be placed in his cell with him. The guards obliged -most likely assuming that he would beat me- and Winter took care of me on that first night. He sang to me and rocked me, while I was sobbing into his shoulder."

"But I've never seen you cry."

"You were wiped a few days later. I guess that memory hasn't come back yet. It's not like it's important anyways."

Watching Steve I nod my head towards her. Slowly he steps towards her and hugs her. It takes her a few seconds until she returns it by even then only for a second before pushing Steve away.

"I don't like physical contact. But thank you for trying to make me feel better."

She turns around and starts to hit the bag again. Reopening any cuts that had the slightest chance of closing.

(Silver's P.O.V.)

Winter and the others had left a few minutes ago. Captain had hugged me only for me to push him away. Widow had not said a single word while they were here. Winter looked pained when I told him he had seen me cry, but only to have the memory be destroyed less than a week later. I had told him that it had been a few days but I had lied. It had been the day after when they found me in his cell with him.

I continued hitting the bag in front of me. The swing of the bag kept me going, it reminded me of the last weeks I spent with Winter inside of HYDRA.

**Flash back thingy**

"Harder! Hit it harder! You are able to hit it hard enough for it to break so do it!"

"Ah!"

Screaming as I hit the bag busting some seems I glance at Winter he nods

"Make her continue until her hands bleed. I need a strong assassin that's not afraid to bleed for the cause."

"Yes sir."

Winter looked at me a mouthed

'I'm sorry' before yelling

"You heard him! Let's go!"

I beat the bag until my hands and shins were covered in my own blood. And when Winter said I could quit I kept going not hearing him.

"Silver. Your going to damage yourself. Stop," I continued. "stop please!"

He grabbed my arm as I was swinging and yelled the last part.

It startled me enough to stop and look at him. He pulled me close and picked me up carrying me to the medics room.

**flashback thingy over**

"You need a new bag. That one has blood in it."

"No shit Sherlock."

"Stark actually. But I'm flattered by that mistake."

"It's not a compliment. I'm trying to be rude." Stopping and turning around "And how did you get in here?"

"Watched the others leave. Came in to see what was in here. So far haven't been disappointed. But the real question is; why are you beating that if most of the sand is on the ground or in your cuts?"

"Because I can."

"That's not an answer."

"Oh it's an answer. Might not be one you like, but it's still an answer."

"Touché. You should get those checked out by Bruce," gesturing to my hands and shins he continues "I doubt he would want them to get infected."

"Well he shouldn't have to worry. They will be fine in a few hours. Probably."

He stays silent for a few moments while tapping on his phone.

"He's on his way."

"Who's on his way?"

"Bruce."

"Banner?"

"Yup. You should clean up now because as soon as he gets here he's gonna make you sit."

"When he gets here to do what?"

"Look at your hands and legs. So hurry before he gets here."

Turning and running down the hall Stark leaves me alone once again.

"Clean up? Why do I have to clean up? It's not like there's a mess or anything."

Taking the bloodied bag down from its hook I work on cleaning the sand up and putting it into a garbage bin.

By the time Banner gets to me I'm hanging another bag up and before I notice him a square up and start hitting the bag, leaving blood on it.

"Thats going to hurt in the morning."

"Nah. It'll be fine."

"Sit down."

Looking over my shoulder I scoff at Banner.

"You don't get to tell me what to do. Only Winter gets to."

Of course Winter walks in as I am saying this "Then sit down."

"James your ruining my fun."

"Stark told me she was still going. Now Silver listen to the doctor and sit the heck down."

I look at him scoff and drop to my butt.

"I meant in the chair over here but that works."

He starts walking towards me making me feel small. Shooting up I sit back down on the dumbbell bench and hold out my hands so Banner could see them.

"Why did you shoot up like that?"

"You were to tall standing above me like that. I don't like feeling small."

Now it's Falcons turn to walk in "That's good to know, and good for my assessment."

"Why don't you and your assessment fly off Falcon?"

"Anger issues."

"No I just don't- what's that?"

Banner had pulled something out of the first aid kit I have. I've never opened it but it's something everyone should have.

"It'll help fight infection. You don't have any allergies right?"

"Nothing that I'm aware of. Or HYDRA is for that matter."

"Good. Sam come here I need some assistance with wrapping these. Like how you would before training."

"I suck at that. Winter? You wanna?"

"Never knew how Sam," Almost taunting me Winter walks out the door only to return with Captain in tow "but he does."

"I can wrap them myself Doctor. I learned how."

"You need to keep your hands still for the next twenty minutes. Steve come here." Banner was in on something judging by the glint in his eyes.

"What am I doing?"

While I had been watching the doc I hadn't noticed America walk up beside me.

"None of us other than her know how to wrap hands. Like how someone would get ready for a fight."

"Yah I can do that. Not that hard. But Bucky I thought you know how, how else would she have learned how to?"

"He didn't teach me. Someone from the H-RR did. I mean I was part of H-RR but mostly HYDRA.

By the time I had finished talking Banner had put peroxide and ointment on my hands and legs while Steve was wrapping my hands.

"Silver. I don't remember what the H-RR is. What is it?"

"It's an acronym, that stands for HYDRA Red-Room."

I couldn't understand why they looked so worried when I said that.

"What?"

"Nothing. But let's go to the house. We all need a talk."

[selfship-loving]

That imagine, but with Jyushi tho???

Asking for Advice

I hope you like it! I changed the prompt a bit so I could make Usa suffer a bit.

Usa stretches lazily as she lays on her bed, wallowing in her own boredom. She thinks about what she should do for a few moments before her hearing her phone rings. Hearing the sound of her beloved crushes ringtone, she quickly fumbles and answers the phone, letting out a forced casual “Hey.”

Jyushi immediately starts talking frantically. “Usa, I really need your help figuring something out! It’s super duper important!” he exclaims.

Usa blinks at his sudden proclamation before responding calmly. “Of course. Whats up?” “I need to ask you in person!”

Usa gasps at his sudden proclamation but steels herself and answers “Of course. Would you like to meet up somewhere to talk?”

“Thank you so much! I’ll meet you at your place in a few minutes!” Jyushi exclaims before hanging up.

Usa giggles to herself as she gets up from her bed, excitedly beginning to organize her place and thinking to herself about how lucky she is that no one is home. Just as she finishes putting a blanket in its place, the doorbell rings. Usa perks up at this and clumsily runs to her door to answer it.

Jyushi goes to ring the doorbell again but stops as Usa slams the door open. “Usa-chan! Finally!” he cries dramatically.

Usa laughs and ushers Jyushi in, leading him to the couch. he throws herself down on the couch near him and asks “Tell me, what did you need my help with?”

Jyushi clutches his chest and swoons. “I need advice! On how to confess my feelings to…someone…” He trails off nervously at the end of his sentence, stopping himself from saying something.

Usa frowns and shifts uncomfortably. “Oh..” she responds quietly, trying her best to hide her disappointment. She shakes her disappointment out of her voice and forces a smile. “Well, every girl is different so each confession should be catered to the girl, or person i guess. I mean, you don’t have to like girls or boys, you can like anyone you want but…” she trails off as soon as she realizes she’s ranting. Usa shakily continues “Tell me about this person. If I know more, maybe I can give you more specific advice.”

Jyushi nods and starts speaking excitedly “She’s a big fan of mine! And she’s really cute too! Truly a sight to behold so I know we’d look so good together.”

Usa nods numly and smiles. “Wow, she sounds perfect for you. I’m so glad you’ve found someone like that!” she says sincerely.

He looks at her happily. “She is perfect. I’ve never really felt this way around anyone before and I don’t want to lose her. Now, how should I confess? I need your help, pleasseeeee~” Jyushi proclaims dramatically.

Usa giggles and nods, contemplating how to respond. After a few seconds of thinking, she perks up and says “Well, you said she was a fan of you? Maybe you can sing her a love song? I’m sure she’d be super flattered!”

Jyushi gasps “That’s perfect! Where should I do it?”

“Do you have any places where you have a special memory with this girl?”

Jyushi nods “Yes! Usa, you’re a genius! Thank you so much!” He pulls her into a tight hug before getting up and rushing out. “I need to set something up! Thanks again!”

“Yeah, anytime…” She looks down at her lap sadly, feeling her heart clench. “As long as he’s happy, I need to be happy for him…” Usa soberly gets up from the couch and drags herself to her room. “As long as he’s happy…” she says solemnly. Her lips quiver as she throws herself on her bed, her heart getting heavier the more she repeats this to herself. “Should’ve never gotten my hopes up. You would have thought I learned after last time but-but…” She trails off and buries her face into her pillow, beginning to sob. Eventually, she falls asleep.

An hour later, Usa hears her phone ring. She reluctantly answers her phone. “Uhh Hewwo? Whos this?” she asks groggily.

“Usa, you have to get over to Meijo Park, specifically that one tree you tripped on and twisted your ankle on.” They both laugh fondly at the memory.

“I’ll be there as soon as I can. I wouldn’t want to rush through and hurt myself again.”

“What? You don’t want me to take care of you and carry you to safety like last time?” Jyushi asks teasingly.

“Nah. You almost dropped me like, 3 times.” she giggles.

Usa sleepily drags herself out of bed but ends up tripping over her bedsheets and falling to the ground in a hard thump.

Jyushi gasps over the phone and questions “Usa-chan, are you ok?”

She nods in response before realizing he can’t see her so he wouldn’t be able to see her nod. “Yeah, I’m fine. I just got a bit tangled in my bed sheets. But it’s fine, I’ll be over as soon as I can.”

Jyushi sighs in relief. “Thank you. I’ll see you in a bit~”

Usa hangs up and detangles herself from her sheets, grumbling quietly. “When will I stop letting myself get strung along with these people. This never ends well.”

Meanwhile, Jyushi waits patiently for Usa underneath their tree, the tree where Jyushi fell in love with Usa. “I hope she comes. She seemed upset when I last saw her…” He shakes his head. “Now’s not the time to worry! It’s time to charm my lady!” Jyushi starts some vocal warmups before Usa arrives.

Usa walks slowly, watching the ground to make sure she doesn’t trip on anything. As she arrives, she hears Jyushi call her name. She looks up and sees the tree covered in fairy lights and other decorations, and right next to the tree is Jyushi, dressed as a prince.

When he sees Usa arriving, he runs to her and hugs her, soon after he slides an arm around her waist and guides her to the tree.

Usa stares at him with wide eyes and tries to stutter out a sentence “W-what are you doing? Jyushi, where is-where the girl you like? Is this where you’re gonna confess to her? Why’d you bring me-“

She’s cut off by Jyushi placing a finger on her lips.

Jyushis hand goes to stroke her cheek and he smiles fondly. “Please, just listen.” He says softly.

As he pulls away, Usa reaches out for him. “Wait-“

“Usa, just listen~”

Usas mouth snaps closed and she leans against the tree.

Jyushi goes to turn on a hidden CD player. He hums along to the song until he hears his cue. He soon starts belting out a love song that could bring anyone to their knees. As he sings, he walks over to Usa and holds her against his chest, swaying gently.

Usa blushes wildly but allows herself to be swayed. She wraps her arms around his neck and looks up at him fondly.

He smiles down at her as he sings, slowing his swaying as he finishes his song. When he sings the last lyrics, he places his forehead against hers and closes his eyes, enjoying the closeness.

Usa stares at him hopefully and questions “Uh, J-Jyushi? Where’s that song from? I’ve never heard it before.”

Jyushi opens his eyes and laughs, leaning down to inch their lips closer together. “I love you, my darling. I hope you liked my song. I wrote it just for you~”

Usa gasps and looks around before looking back at him. “Me?” She asks dumbfounded.

Jyushi nods and tangled his fingers in her hair. “Who else is here?”

“N-no one I guess but I just never expected someone like you to like-uh, love someone like-”

Jyushi cuts her off and places a soft kiss on her lips.

Usa gaps against his lips and tries to pull away out of shock but Jyushi’s fingers in her hair keep her against his lips.

Usa closes her eyes and enjoys the moment before Jyushi pulls away. He quietly speaks up “I’m glad you’d advice worked. It’d be so tragic if you rejected me after all of this work. And all of those hours I spent writing that song.”

Usa perks up. “Hours? When did you write that song?” She asks curiously.

“I’ve been writing that song for a few weeks but today I had the inspiration to finish it and confess to you~”

She giggles and pulls him down for another quick kiss on his lips. “I’m so glad you did this for me. I was so sad after you asked me for advice. My heart was so broken all I could do was wallow in my bed and cry!” Usa swoons in his arms dramatically and clutches her chest. “My heart was shattered. But now my prince has healed it~”

Jyushi laughs a heavenly laugh and picks her up, princess style. He asked with a wink “Would you like to go home and cuddle with me, Princess?”

Usa nods eagerly and hugs his torso tightly. “Yes please. You need to make it up to me for scaring me like that.” she says teasingly.

Jyushi laughs and starts walking to Usas place. “I promise I’ll never make you cry like that again! And if anyone else makes you cry, I’ll make sure to bring them to justice!” he proclaims loudly.

Usa laughs and covers his mouth with her hand. “Jyushi no! Someone might hear!” She says in between laughs.

Jyushi nuzzles her hands fondly. “I’ll proclaim my love to the entire world, if you want me to~”

“You don’t have to! I think being with me is enough.”

Jyushi smiles and leans down to kiss her one last time before arriving at her house.

The two lovers enter her house to cuddle, content with themselves because they know they’re loved by each other.

[svtegg]

syncope (SVT apocalypse!au)

♡ wordcount: 2,1k ♡ chapter 3/? (chapter 1 & chapter 2 is here!)

♡ rated PG-13: mentions of blood, voilence and death, sexual themes

♡ pairing: svt x reader (mostly soonyoung in this part!)

♡ After meeting the boy from the office building again, finding out he was named Soonyoung and then running from him in a panic after another one of the men in his group had shouted for him, I found myself in dire need. The scorching summer was nothing but ruthless and my supplies where long gone. In a last attempt at saving my own life I had searched for water in a park across town but barely managed to get there in time, my weak body giving out. But where did that voice come from? Who was staning in front of my half-unconcious body? How long had I been blacked out? 

“Hyung. Look, over there!” I could faintly hear a voice and then footsteps approaching me, the dry ground almost crunching under the weight of the person walking around me. The voice was soft and high pitched, with a sort of bounce to it. I opened my eyes but couldn’t move. My vision was swimming, and everything seemed to be further away somehow. The foggy silhouettes of two people leaning over me, the green grass and the light blue sky above. There where birds singing in the trees looming above me, and I felt like I had died. An eerie peacefulness encapsulating my body as I blinked in an effort to clear my vision. Then black. And blue. The sky, the fluffy white clouds drifting past me miles above where the only thing I could focus on. I couldn’t really feel my body, but the familiar sound of birds and the smell of grass was still registered by my senses before my body decided I needed to go back into the darkness.

Jicheol had led Eunju, Junghyun and I back into the city. I had recognized the signs. Seoul. The four of us had moved from camp to camp, avoiding the packs of roamers as best as we could. We had almost been hunted down by a group of raiders, or bandits. They drove around in a big military looking vehicle, yelling and laughing as they hit roamers and drove over those who where already dead. Crazy. They must be crazy. Jicheol had managed to hide us in a back alley as they drove past, a huge container serving as our shelter for the night as we waited for the raiders to drive off elsewhere.

“Hello? Are you okay?” I could hear somewhere far away. I could feel my body laying on something soft, and a faint sound of something roaring. It could have been a car engine. “She’s talking, hyung..” a distressed voice said, it suddenly sounded closer. I tried opening my eyes but it was too bright. “Something about a Jicheol?” the same voice continued. I could feel my body shaking slightly, my muscles involuntary clenching as I suddenly became really cold.

“I’m hungry..” Junghyun complained for the nth time that day, it was hot and the sun was burning the skin on my shoulders. No one answered the young boy as the group of 4 trekked along a highway full of abandoned and rusted cars. Eunju was panting heavily beside me. “I’m hungry!” The young boy said again, louder this time. No one answered. There had been nothing. Nothing for days. No food, no water, nothing. A breeze blew by but somehow the wind made me feel even hotter. “I’m hungry!” The child stomped. Eunju turned around, her voice hoarse and dry. “We know, Junghyunnie. We don’t have food, sweetie. You’ll have to hold on for a litte longer.” She breathed, her skin dry but still sweaty, and looking to be on the verge of burning under the unforgiving sun. Jicheol kept walking. His broad back becoming smaller as his heavy footsteps took him away from the rest of us.  

A bridge was coming up, which meant there would maybe be a run-down convenience store or a gas station somewhere near. “Just a little longer.” Eunju repeated exhaustedly as she turned around, following Jicheol’s footsteps. The boy sighed, and trailed after the old woman and as I stood there I could see the backsides of what was left of my group. A broad, strong looking man in his late 40s, a young small boy, smaller than his actual age with a bright neon cap on his head and a older woman, her back looking tired under the weight of her backpack. They all looked exhausted, I was took. Keep walking.

My eyes couldn’t focus and it was dark. Way too dark. I took a couple of breaths, first deep ones to calm myself then it evened out into easier lighter breaths. I blinked a couple of times as I tried to adjust my eyes to the environment. It smelled like wood. Not trees but actual chopped wood used to make fires. Firewood. It smelled a little like synthetic fabric. I could feel my head banging as made an effort to sit up, and I had to steady myself as I looked around. It looked like a small bedroom, almost like a motel. The walls where wood colored, the floor in a beige carpet. A dresser was placed under the window by the door. The window seemed to have been covered with something because small glimpses of sunlight peaked through one of the cracks in whatever it was covering the window. I was on top of a bed, an unzipped sleeping bag thrown over me, and a flannel covering the pillow that had been placed under my head.

I try sitting up, but at first my entire body gave out, my muscles aching at the slightest movement. I turn around slightly and a sharp pain shoots down my right arm. I bite my tongue to keep quiet and sit up. As my feet met the carpet, I noticed my shoes where gone as the carpet tickled the underside of my feet. I looked around and noticed my boots by the night stand. And on top of the nightstand, an unplugged bedside light and plate of food. It looked like bread with something red on, jam maybe. I didn’t spare it a second glance as I pulled my boots onto my feet and rose up from the bed. A wave of dizziness hit me, and I staggered a little before I steadied myself on the closet by the end of the bed.

As I stood and let myself breathe while I tried to focus my eyes back onto the carpet, I heart voices outside. “Seen anything on the lookout?” A deep voice said, it seemed to come from right outside the door to the room I was currently in. I froze. “Nah, no activity tonight. But that’s really the best outcome of a shift. How’s the newcomer doing?” the other person answered, voice even deeper than the first one. “I don’t know, there’s not been much activity there either. I checked a couple hours ago and she still hadn’t touched her food so I don’t think she’s conscious yet.” They seemed to go quiet for a while, until I heard more talking. “Was it Minghao and Cheol that found her?” One of them inquired. The other voice hummed in confirmation. “In one of the parks in fucking Guri.” Answered the lighter voice. “Shit, dude. That place is infested with lurkers all over. Lucky thing she wasn’t eaten alive.” They continue talking, and I start moving around the room. My knife is gone, and my thigh strap is no where to be found. They also took my backpack. I look though all the cabinets and drawers. Nothing. I creep back over to the bed and sit down, I can’t just leave. It seems like they, whoever they are, have set up guard outside the door of my room. My physique is nowhere near able to bust out and escape, I don’t know where I am or what’s outside the door of the apartment, I’m currently trapped in. But why did they bring me back here? Why didn’t they just leave me to die? Or kill me themselves?

As I sit and ponder about what to do, the handle of the door only meters in front of me turns and suddenly I’m face to face with a tall man. “Oh, good! You’re awake.” He says casually and opens the door wider. He stands there, looking down at me as I keep sitting on the bed. “Are you no hungry?” He questions, a slight smile on his lips as he gestures towards the food on the nightstand. I look down at my hands for a moment and then back up at him. The man is very handsome, a black tshirt stretched across his torso, black hair tousled and half covering his eyes. Light wash blue jeans that seem more like beige because of the specks of mud and dirt that are spattered across his legs. He hums in a questioning tone, the hoarseness of his voice shining through even when he’s just humming. “Where am I?” I say, my voice weak, dry and hoarse. I cough a little and look back at the man in front of me. “A little north of Seoul.” He answers simply as he leans against the door frame, still smiling slightly. It was hard to tell if it was a friendly smile or a smug one.

I didn’t say anything else, just looked around the room as his stare is fixed on me. I move a little and hiss at the pain that aches in my shoulder. “What’s wrong with your shoulder?” He perks, his head leaning a little forward to peek through the strands of hair hanging in his face. “I think its dislocated.” I state, my voice still a little strained from the pain. “Shit, how long has it been like that?” He asks in a hushed voice as he moves towards me, I flinch, and he stops in his tracks. “I don’t know, going on about three weeks, I think. I’ve lost track of time.” I state, my eyes scanning the tall man. His eyes meet mine and he seems to be gauging my reaction as he slowly moves towards me. “Let me have a look at it.” He rasps and takes the last two steps over and squats down to my level. When I don’t say anything, he reaches a hand out and places it on the back of my shoulder while his other hand comes up to lightly poke the skin around my collarbones.

His hands where cold, and the air that was now blowing in through the open door is chilly. I took a deep breath in. After a while the man looks back at me, and he smiles softly but his eyes still show worry. “I think we can fix this, but I’m gonna need some help.” He states, voice upbeat and friendly. He stands back up and runs a hand through his hair. As he moves around me, I can smell the scent of smoke, campfire smoke, and pine. And a little bit of sweat. “If you wanna come with me I’ll see if I can find someone to help me fix you up a bit, maybe we’ll even be in time for dinner.” He smiles, voice soft and I can hear a hint of a lisp when he speaks. “Sure.” I whisper, before I even get the chance to think about it. The man seems so friendly and I somehow choose to blindly trust him as I follow after him when he leaves the room.

The place I’ve ended up seems to be some sort of mountain resort, motel layout with several rooms. There are two additional buildings beside the one we’re currently walking down the stairs of. One of them seems to be some sort of administration or facility house, and the other is just a huge hangar. Maybe used as some sort of storage or parking housing. Then there’s the three-story residential housing I’m currently walking down the steps of. The entire facility is painted in deep red colors with green doors and windows, thick wooden beams keeping the overhanging ceiling in place. I spot a fence longer down the road, and something that looks like a watch tower tucked into the tree line.

“I’m Mingyu by the way.” The man says as he looks back at you. His eyes sparkle a little in the low evening sun, the orange light from the sunset making his skin almost glow. Then he turns back and keeps walking. As I look around some more, I spot two cars parked between some of the foliage behind some piles of wood. One seemed to be a dark grey Kia Morning in surprisingly good condition, the other was too far behind a tree to see but it looked to be in good shape as well. As we made our way into the ajar building I could faintly smell something that reminded of food. “What is this place?” I whisper, more to myself but Mingyu hears and chuckles.

“Camp.” He simply says as he reaches the glass door to the facility housing. “We’re a group who lives here, we’re doing pretty well actually.” He continues as he holds open the door, signaling for me to go inside. I look up at him, then back at the door. “You don’t have to be afraid.” Mingyu smiles, “I promise we’re nice.” I sigh and step through the entrance, and Mingyu follows, closing the door softly behind himself.

[skelenyxx]

Chapter 1 - Old Friends, New Drama ~ It’s Death or Victory

"Where, where will we stand when all the lights go out across these city streets? Where were you when all of the embers fell? I still remember them. Covered in ash. Covered in glass. Covered in all my friends. I still think of the bombs they built." ~ The Only Hope For Me Is You

**********

The sound of my alarm filled my ears as I awoke. I opened my eyes instantly and reached under my pillow, snatching my phone and switching the alarm off.

I smiled as I noticed the date. December 21, 2012. Today was the day. Today was the day that I would finally get to see them, after three years.

I crawled out of bed and started going through my closet, trying to decide what to wear. I eventually decided on a plain purple tee and black jeans. After I had showered and dressed, I applied a small amount of makeup and grabbed my bag. I smiled as I looked in the mirror. I smoothed my long, straight blonde hair and pushed my bangs to the side. My thin line of eyeliner accented my blue eyes perfectly and my outfit was plain and simple. Perfect.

I left my apartment with a smile on my face.

As I walked down the LA streets toward the coffee shop, the morning sun peaking between the tall buildings of the city, I began to think about how all this had come to be and how I had ended up with such amazing friends.

It had started in High School in Jersey. I was a Freshman, taking an Honors math class (like the geek I am). One day I got partnered with a quiet senior guy with dark hair and swirling hazel eyes. He told me his name was Gerard.

Somehow, even though we were practically polar opposites, we became close friends. I was some innocent goody two shoes Freshman girl and he was a dorky Senior boy with few friends and eyes that showed that there was more darkness inside than he let out. He was my first and probably one of my only friends in high school.

Obviously, he graduated that year. But he didn't go off to college. He decided to stay home and help his mom and brother out. It turned out that his brother, Mikey, went to school with me as well and was only two years older than me. He and I also became good friends and on weekends, Gerard, Mikey and I would all hang out, playing video games, talking about comic books, or just generally causing mischief around the old town. We had some good times, and I feel like us being friends was the only thing that kept us each from falling apart from the inside out.

I was in my senior year when Gerard told me he was starting a band. I was so excited for him. He always loved to talk about art and music. I always told him he needed to do something creative for a career because, honestly, I couldn't picture him doing anything else with his life.

One day, after he had gotten the lineup of the band, he invited me to come out to see one of their practices and meet the rest of the members. I had spent the whole day in school anticipating heading to his house afterward so I could meet the guys that he oh so often talked about. I remember clearly how anxious I was as I pulled into the driveway, unsure of what to expect. If Gerard thought highly of them, then they couldn't be that bad. But I was terrible at making friends and I had an unfortunate habit of annoying people I met.

Ms. Way led me to the garage where loud music could be heard. It was interesting, different to say the least. I couldn't even really describe the sort of genre of rock it quite sounded like. But I liked it.

I caught the tail end of a song that the band was finishing practicing. Just by watching them, I could tell that they were in their elements. Gerard was singing (and being a sassy mofo during the process), Mikey was on bass, there was a guy with quite the fro rocking out on lead guitar, and a shorter guy with dark hair and a pretty strong eyeliner game jumping around like he'd had fifty monsters while playing rhythm guitar. Both guitarists did backing vocals as well and I even saw the shorter guy doing some screaming.

(A/N: I'm not mentioning the drummer because the only drummer I have any knowledge on is Bob Bryar and he won't be included in this story)

Gerard introduced me to the others, Ray being the guy with the large hair and Frank being the shorter guy with the eyeliner. After band practice, we all went out to get something to eat and I really enjoyed hanging out with them. They all had pretty unique personalities and Ray and Frank were really cool guys.

Eventually, I became just as close with Frank and Ray as I was with Gerard and Mikey. I went to every one of their local shows in the early days and was overjoyed when they got picked up by a label. We kept in touch while they were touring and I watched as the fanbase grew from a tiny following to sold out stadium shows.

The band was called My Chemical Romance.

But as the band grew bigger and tour grew more hectic, I saw them less and less. One time I went for a whole year without so much as a text message from them. Not that it was a big deal to me, I mean, they were crazy busy and I knew that. And what with my moving to LA to take classes at UCLA, there had just been very little chance to catch up with them.

Fast forward several years and I was receiving a call from none other than Gerard Way himself, telling me that it had been way too long and that everyone wanted to meet up with me when they came through LA. I agreed immediately considering the fact that I'd been missing them like crazy.

And there I was, walking down the early morning LA street, pulling my brown leather jacket closer around me to keep the chill of the early morning air from seeping into my bones. The streets were already bustling with people, calling cabs and pushing past people without so much as an "excuse me."

I was relieved when I entered the quiet and warm coffee shop. It was a family owned shop, and better than any chain coffee place you'd find in LA. I came here regularly and the smell of coffee and the hint of chocolate was somewhat comforting. I ordered my usual, a caramel macchiato (fancy, I know), and took my usual place at the booth in the corner and waited.

Every time I heard the ring of the bell on the door, my head snapped to the front in hope that it was them. But even after forty-five minutes of waiting, they were yet to arrive. They were late.

I was beginning to wonder if they had forgotten when the bell rang yet again. I looked to the front of the shop to see a man with shocking red hair walk through the door, followed closely by a man with a brown afro, a man with brown hair and glasses, and a short man with nearly black hair and a wide grin on his face.

Gerard.

Ray.

Mikey.

Frank.

My guys.

My best friends.

Gerard's hazel eyes scanned the room and he smiled as they landed on me, sat in the corner of the room. I smiled and waved at them.

Their faces almost seemed to light up as they saw me and walked in my direction. My smile grew bigger as I stood from the booth, fixing my shirt in the process, so that I could give them a hug. God, I'd missed them.

As they got closer in the few brief seconds, Frank ran past the others and half shouted, "Skylar!"

I laughed as the man grabbed me and spun me in a circle. I didn't care that people were looking at us weirdly, they could get over it. Frank put me back on the ground and wrapped his arms around my torso and squeezed me tight. I buried my face into his shoulder and smiled. I loved his hugs.

He stepped away from me and I noticed the others had reached us, each with their own signature grin plastered on their faces. Frank ruffled my hair a bit and I pouted at him. He just smirked, his greenish hazel eyes sparkling as he brushed his dark hair from his face. It had grown significantly longer since the last time I'd seen him.

Mikey came next, smiling as he bent over a bit, since he was considerably taller than myself, to give me a hug.

"Man, did we miss you," He chuckled.

I laughed again. "I missed you guys, too."

He pulled away and Ray said, "Alright my turn!"

He, like Frank and Mikey, wrapped me in a tight hug.

"Careful, his hair might eat you, Sky," Someone said behind me.

"Shut up, Iero," Ray laughed, his chest vibrating with the action. I pulled away and patted Ray's hair.

"Nah. It's friendly," I laughed.

"Alright, come on. Don't I get a hug?" Gerard asked, feigning hurt.

"Of course you do, Gerard."

He pulled me in for a hug. "God, I fucking missed you," He said quietly.

I smiled. "I missed you too, Gee."

We pulled away and filed into the booth. Ray and Mikey sat on one side of the table. Gerard sat down on the other side, followed by myself. Before I even had the chance to move over more so Frank could sit, Frank was sitting on my lap.

"Um, excuse me sir, but what are you doing?" I asked him.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" He replied, turning a bit to look at me and send me a smirk.

"Shouldn't I be the one sitting on your lap, considering I'm the girl?"

He shrugged, continuing to smirk.

"Unless there's something you're not telling us, Frank..." I trailed off. This time it was my turn to smirk.

"Wh-" Before he could even finish his reply, I shoved him off of my lap. He only barely managed to keep his balance and avoid falling face first onto the tile of the coffee shop. The guys laughed and Gerard gave me a high five as I scooted over so Frank could sit next to me.

Frank sat down next to me, squishing me between Gerard and himself on the small bench.

"So how have you been, short stuff?" Frank asked me.

"Look who's talking, shorty," I replied.

"Hey, at least I'm taller than you."

"Barely."

"It's enough for me."

I laughed, rolling my eyes at the clown of a man.

"No, but really, how have you been, Sky? It's been forever since we've seen you," Ray said from across the table.

I smiled and laced my fingers on the table. "I've been good. My life has been absolutely insane but it's been pretty good."

"How's college been going for you?" Mikey asked.

"It's probably the most stressful thing I've ever done in my life, but I'm surviving. I actually graduate in a few months." I smiled again.

"What are you majoring in?" Gerard asked.

"Science. Biological sciences to be exact. I'm hoping to go into Criminalistics."

"Ooooo gonna be a scientist for the police department, huh?" Frank asked.

I nodded. "I'm also taking a course to be a certified EMT."

"Emergency Medical Technician, right?" Ray asked.

I nodded again.

"What for?"

"Well, you guys know my dad was an EMT. He taught me that it was always good to have emergency medical skills. You never know when you could need them. And, plus, it can save you a whole hell of a lot of money on medical bills when you can fix the problem yourself."

"And that's the Skylar we know, always thinking ahead," Gerard said with a smile, brushing his red hair out of his eyes.

I chuckled. "Yep, that's me. So what about you guys? How's everything with the band been going? I hear you guys are going in to record your fifth album."

"Yep. It's been great. The fans are amazing and it's great to just be doing what we love for a living. I couldn't think of anything else I'd rather be doing with my life," Gerard said.

"Man, it feels like it was just yesterday that you guys were still a garage band. You guys are huge now. It's mind blowing."

"Yeah. I can't say that we really believe it half the time," Mikey chuckled.

"So how are the fans?" I asked.

"They are the best fans you could ever ask for. They are so supportive of everything and they are so spirited it's just crazy," Ray laughs.

"I hear they have a thing for shipping you guys together," I laugh. "The one I hear of the most is between you two." I look at Gerard and Frank.

Gerard laughs a bit. "Frank and I can't even have a conversation on Twitter without them commenting 'Frerard.'"

"No kidding," Frank said.

"I don't even get why it's called 'Frerard,'" Gerard commented.

I turned to look at him. "What do you mean?"

"I mean why does Frank's name come first? Why can't it be something like, I don't know, Grank or something?"

I laughed.

"Because I'm awesome and Grank sounds stupid," Frank said.

"It sounds better than Frerard."

"It so doesn't."

"It totally does!"

Frank was silent for a second before replying in a mocking tone. "Or maybe it's because I would totally top in that relationship."

I was trying my hardest not to fall off the bench from laughing so hard.

"No way in fucking hell. I would totally top," Gerard replied, his voice serious.

"Nu-uh! It would be me."

"Not a chance, shorty."

"Skylar?" Both said in unison, asking my opinion on the apparently serious controversy.

I looked back and forth between the two of them before replying. "I ship it," I said with a smirk.

We all bust up laughing and began talking about other things, the conversation being put aside and forgotten.

************

It was later in the evening and we were walking down the slowly emptying LA streets, headed to their tour bus so I could see them off. We had spent the day wandering around the city, going into stores with no intention of buying anything, visiting a street fair, and even seeing a movie. It had been a really good day, but it had gone too fast and now they were leaving again. God knows when I would be seeing them again.

The guys had slowed their pace and were whispering to each other behind me. I stopped walking and turned around to face the whispering bunch.

"What are you four being so secretive about?" I asked, quirking my eyebrow.

Gerard sighed. "Well, it's been three years since we've seen you. That means we've missed three birthdays and three Christmases. We've missed quite a lot lately and haven't been keeping up with you nearly as much as we should. So, to help make up for that, we got you something."

"What have I told you guys about getting me gifts?" I asked. I'd told them time and time again not to get me gifts. Half the time, I couldn't afford to get them anything and even when I could, it never compared to what they got me. And honestly, I didn't want anything. As cheesy as it sounds, their friendship was all I needed.

Frank waved his hand dismissively. "Oh shut up and just accept the gift, Sky," He said with a smirk.

Gee pulled a small, rectangular, black box from his jacket pocket and handed it to me. I flipped open the lid and gasped at what I saw.

It was a necklace. It had a sturdy looking golden chain and hanging from it was a simple, golden circular disc, appearing to be approximately one inch in diameter. It was simple and elegant and I loved it.

"Flip the disk over," Mikey instructed. I did as he said and had to practically fight back tears. On the back of the circular charm, my name was engraved in the center. And following the edges of the circle, each of their names were engraved, creating a circle of their names around mine. It was beautiful.

"This way you can always have something to remind you of us and know that we are always here for you," Ray said as I looked up at them.

"Oh, guys," I said, looking at each of them. "It's beautiful. Thank you so much." I pulled them in for a group hug and still had to fight back tears. It was just a necklace, but it meant the world to me.

Gerard grabbed the box from my hands as we broke the hug and fastened the necklace around my neck. I smiled as I felt the cold metal of the disc touch my skin. "I'll never take it off," I said.

"So when's the last time you saw one of our shows?" Gerard asked as he came back around to the front of me with the others.

I thought for a second, trying to remember. "At least four years," I said. "Not since the beginning of the Black Parade tour." The guys each began to smirk at me. "What?" I asked.

"You're coming with us, then," Ray said.

"What?"

"You're going to come up to the Northern California shows over the next several days with us and we'll pay for you to fly back before we leave the state," Mikey replied.

"We even have an extra bunk in the bus for you. We can stop by your apartment on the way out so you can get your clothes and stuff," Frank said with a smile.

My head was exploding with excitement. I loved seeing their shows and it'd been so long since I'd seen one. I get to spend the next several days with them, traveling around California and seeing them play for the fans. It'd be amazing. But I decided to mess with them a little bit first. "And what makes you think I would want to spend the next several days trapped on a bus with you guys?" I asked seriously, crossing my arms over my chest for an added effect.

For once, the guys actually looked confused and at a loss for words. My face broke into a grin. "I'm just kidding. I'd love to." The guys cheered.

************

It was the middle of the night when I woke up in my bunk on the bus. I was in my loose white tank top and black flannel pajama pants. After all, that's what I had put on for bed. I sighed as I checked the time, realizing it was close to eleven o'clock at night, the same night that we had left LA. I pulled back the dark curtains blocking the entrance to my bunk and slid out into the hallway. I chucked as I crept past the other bunks, the sound of the guys' snores resonating throughout the hall.

I pulled out a plastic cup from the cupboard in the main room and filled it with water, gripping the counter a bit to keep myself from falling over due to the bumps in the road. I glanced around the main room and spotted my backpack lying in the corner of the room. The very bag that held my clothes, a few bottles of water and several of my favorite granola bars (because I loved those things and refused to leave my apartment without them), and my extensive first aid kit that I always brought with me, thanks to the fact that I was a training EMT. When I showed the guys everything I had in it, they claimed that I could perform surgery with all of the supplies I had in it. That was pretty much true.

I looked out the window of the bus, watching as a sign reading "Route Guano" passed by. It appeared that we were in the middle of the California desert at that point. No sign of civilization in sight.

I shivered as I thought back to the chilling nightmare that had woken me from my sleep.

I was standing in the middle of the desert, the beating sun baking my skin as I stared and the motionless bodies of my best friends, each of them lying in a pool of their own blood. They were wearing strange clothes and there were strange guns scattered around the scene. Before I had the chance to move, the scene changed.

I was standing in a building, heat blistering my skin and the smell of smoke depriving my lungs of oxygen. A flash of red hair passed my vision. I called out to it, in hopes that they could tell me what was happening. But before they could do anything, a flaming mass of ceiling collapsed on me.

The scene changed again before I could feel the pain. I was crouched behind an overturned table beside Frank. Strange flashes of light passed over our heads and beside the table. Frank stood up quickly, firing a strange green gun in the opposite direction of us. Without warning, he collapsed to the ground beside me, blood pooling from a wound in his chest. I panicked as I scrambled beside him and tried to stem the bleeding. I called his name in desperation, trying to keep him alive as long as possible. Panic rose in my chest, choking my brain and causing me to not be able to think clearly. I didn't know what to do. His frantic hazel eyes met mine as he gasped for breath. He tried to say something to me, but his breathing hitched, cutting his words off. Then, he was still, his chest stopped rising, and his vacant eyes stared into mine.

I screamed in anger and rose from the ground, wielding a strange purple gun and firing at men in white suits. I didn't know what I was doing or why, but my body behaved as though it were second nature as I shot down person after person. Then, I noticed the other bodies on the ground, deathly still and pools of blood around them.

Ray, Mikey, and Gerard.

I was alone.

Then I woke up.

I had never had such a strange and chilling nightmare before. It's not like it meant anything, but it was just weird.

I had just started to head back to my bunk when the sound of an earth-shattering explosion pierced through the silent night. Before I knew what was happening, the world began to spin and I was flying through the air, my brain barely processing the sound of tearing metal and shattering glass.

My head hit something hard and the world turned black.

[imagine-wannaone]

Let That Ship Sale

Lmao once again can’t title but I’m back, and the request was for an award show or something but the isac’s where the other day and wanna one has never gone and I like to dream okay so I hope this is okay, i could do another at an actual show w another member if you’d like idk. Also props to whoever can tell whoever the idols faces at the isac’s I edited out of the pictures (That I don’t own btw credit to owners) for the header board thingy belong to hehe.

Summary: All your fans are shipping you with Daniel and you can’t say you disagree.

 • The ISAC’s were always something you had mixed emotions about,  • Your group was pretty popular and didn’t exactly need the promotion, but your company was small so it was a good idea to go anyway, even if it was just to have a bit of fun,  • You enjoyed spending time with friends from other groups and sending your fans things you’d made, but you could be working on new songs and just the fact the day was so long,  • But at least you got to wear a tracksuit like damn,  • You were a self producing group who tried out most genres, generally more hiphop and R&B so you’d had many different clothing styles, but nothing beat the black tracksuit the event organizer handed you and the four others in your group,  • But at way too early o'clock (honestly any time before 11 am) you pulled yourself out of the car with your group and made your way to the stadium, you all had unique styles; braided hair or sunglasses,  • Wow y'all so beautiful and powerful looking I’m quaking,  • Y'all known for singing about important matters and independence and basically being badass and are actually rlly respected for it and popular,  • Don’t take no shit from no one, you’re out to win today,  • And to compliment your friends about all their comebacks and catch up of course,  • And then there’s the small matter of Mr Kang Daniel,  • One of the boys of the Monster Rookie™ group Wanna One that had taken the nation’s hearts pretty much overnight,  • The fans of your group and his had, continuously since their debut, been shipping you nonstop,  • And yeah, you thought he was cute and funny but you’d never even met; the most you’ve done was nod to each other or complimented his group on passing after a performance,  • And you’re slightly afraid that the shipping would now make it awkward for the two of you to meet and interact; afraid your Stan’s would take it way too far,  • You just hope you can get a ‘hi’ or a quick conversation in today with him, although you know it may be difficult,  • But your whole group is about not really caring about others’ standards, so you’re going have to remember that,  • The opening runs smoothly, and you manage to sneak up to where the fans are and hand out your lunch boxes yourself, although the rules say you really shouldn’t go to the fans area,  • (VIXX what trolls this year tho I love them)  • You’re sat with Irene and Yeri, Seulgi quite literally asleep on your lap and your members teasing your fans not 10 feet away and honestly wow,  • But then the archery gets called up and you have to slide yourself away,  • Which breaks your heart because yanno when a puppy is asleep on you so you can’t move?  • Like that,  • But you grab Tae, the member you’re going to do archery with, and wander off,  • You go second, so while you’re waiting you slip some black face paint out of your pocket, before painting some black streaks across Tae’s cheeks as she paints 3 down your face,  • Because how else you gunna show you’re ready for war?????  • As soon as your competitors look over to you they burst out laughing at the funny faces you pull, one of those competitors in waiting including Kang Daniel himself,

 • You make sure to send him a goofy fake scowl, challenging him, to which he cracks up,

• Omg a beautiful sight, Daniel smiling? Those cresent eyes? Soft cheeks? WoW,  • In essence - face paint is a very effective way to distract your competitors as well as amusing your fans,  • And you totally ace the archery,  • You walk away with a Silver medal and that’s totally good enough for you,  • But then an interview reporter grabs you and you’re whisked away,  • At this point you’re used to it, them Interviewers - they’re everywhere,  • “Y/N congratulations on the silver medal! It must have something to do with the face paint?”  • The lady smiles brightly and you laugh a little,  • “It must be, it was Tae’s idea to show we meant business,”  • The lady laughs at this, and starts to ask questions about your latest comeback and the paint, noting how you may have started a new fashion trend, the concept of your new song and making you rap a little bit of your verse, to which your fans scream,  • Wow we love a supportive family,  • They make your heart race as always as you wave to them,  • “One quick thing before you go, Y/N, I don’t suppose you’ve heard your fans talk about you and wanna ones Kang Daniel?”  • You’re heart drops at that and you blush, laughing nervously,  • “I’ve seen a few things, but don’t know a lot about it,”  • You’re such a great liar damn no one suspects a thing,  • “Ah, quite a lot of fans are shipping you; saying you’d make a very cute couple,”  • You know this is very much a breach of privacy and kinda rude, but you’re known for being quite laid back in your group, so you’re not thrown, although maybe a little lost for words,

 • And answers,  • And anything that won’t give away your small crush on the member of wanna one,  • “ Ah, I think our fans are right, Daniel is very cute and charming, although I’ve not really got the opportunity to get to know him yet,”  • Lmao smooth,  • Yeah right, you’re pretty obvious,  • Although you’re sort of mortified by the fact you’ve inadvertently just said 1) Daniel is very cute to thousands of people and 2) you basically ship the two of you,  • You do your natural thing and play it off as if you just told them your first name,  • You hear some laughing nearby and quickly glance to spot where you recognise Ong Seongwoo and Kim  Jaehwan slapping Daniel himself on the back, way too close, his cheeks bright red and a soft smile on his face as the cameras, no doubt, zoom in on him,  • He waves a little when he sees you looking,  • Wow what is a normal heart rate,

 • You laugh,  • At least you’re not the only one to get a taste of this embarrassment,  • You’re not alone in your suffering,  • And you nearly run away to hide when the interviewer motions Daniel to come closer and he actually complies,  • What a snake,  • He greets the interviewer and the two of you bow to each other all flushed, not knowing how to stand next to each other,  • It’s all very awkward wow,  • You know you’ve all been in the situation where you’re with that family member and they’ve already asked about school/work and now have nothing to say,  • yeah idk if that’s too specific,  • “Daniel, I don’t suppose you’ve heard about the fans shipping either? How do you feel about it?”  • You want to melt as Daniels eyes meet yours and a smile stretches across his face,  • “I think y/n’s music is incredible and she’s very cute and I’d like to get to know her more,”  • You’re dead,  • Daniels whole face is red as his eyes skim everywhere and he laughs a little,  • This is so weird and unheard of, don’t fans usually not want their idols to date? Aren’t there many things and rules about this?  • (y'all it’s stupid it’s their own life let idols date if they want)  • But here you are, stood next to your crush, both of you blushing messes, getting set up by your own fans,  • “Well that’s very interesting, make sure to get to know each other later,”

 • The MC/interviewer chirps and you laugh and stay cool as always, proud you haven’t let anything show except for maybe a slight blush,  • Daniel goes to leave but quickly throws his arms around you, giving you a hug at the speed of light before flying away,

 • You can hear the fans in the stadium squeal jeez,  • Wow, what just happened???  • You quickly jog back to your group who’s hanging out with GFriend and Seventeen after having to send some aegyo to the crowd,  • You nearly died of the embarrassment and cringe, but soldiered through,  • Let’s just say you get roasted,  • Apparently everyone in your group is a savage???? Do they hate you???? Wish for your torment?????  • Nah they’re just your best friends,  • And just when you’re forgetting about your interview ordeal, your group gets called for the relay race you’re all determined to conquer, having perfect harmony for the change over,  • While you may not be the tallest, you’re all fast as hell, having run away from your manager a couple of times,  • Lmao you just wanted boba tea,  • But you draw more paint, all slightly different, onto the others’ faces before heading over to the track to show everyone what running actually is,  • You run last, which is a lot of pressure wow,  • And your member is running towards you and they’re neck and neck with a member of twice like damn,  • But you take the baton smooth as hell and your legs move quicker than you can compute, almost leaving your torso behind as you focus your whole mind on faster, smoother, faster,  • As you’re speeding past you spot Daniel out of the corner of your eye yelling and you can hear your name and wow,  • Your heart starts hammering even harder and your head goes a little dizzy, your legs stumbling a little,  • But nah you don’t let no boy get in the way of your gold medal as you steam ahead and wow,  • 1st place what a gem,  • I mean it’s your 3rd gold medal in relay, you guys holding the title, just champs I guess ¯\_(ツ)_/¯  • When sport 💪💪 is life ✌✌✌ can’t let anyone 👨👩 beat you 💃💃  • I hate myself,  • But then Daniel’s doing relay as well so you make sure to cheer equally as loud,  • Which is hard when you’re still catching your breath,  • Who needs Oxygen anyway???  • And the little shit has the audacity to, very obviously, send you a wink,  • An unmistakable wink,  • What sort of out of the world confidence does he have, he was in 2nd place as well,  • As much as you’re shook, it makes you a little soft, but no one will leT yOu lIVE,  • All slapping your back or ruffling your hair,  • The DeFianCe???  • But you go to get a water bottle and who do you run into?  • Yeah, Daniel,  • “Congrats on gold~”  • His soft tone,  • wow,  • His soft smile,  • Wow,  • The two if you actually talking?  • W o w,  • “Hey I’m sorry about earlier, I didn’t mean to put you in the spot and-”  • Lmao yeah, maybe you feel bad a lil for dragging him into what may be a nightmare of always being asked about each other,  • “No it’s okay, I’ve wanted to talk to you for a long time, I meant it when I said you where cute,”  • Wow you’re a goner for this rookie,  • “So did I,”  • Wow smooth, not awkward at all,

 • “I like the paint by the way, but it makes you a little scary when you’re not smiling,”  • Lmao the idea was for you and the squad to look scary and badass especially for the broadcast,  • Little do the fans know the next Comeback has a fierce concept,  • Lmao playing with fans wow that’s always fun 🙃🙃🙃  • “Here,”  • You bring your face paint tub out and hold it up for him, raising an eye brow in question,  • He laughs and nods goofily, to which you crack the paint out,

 • You run a finger from his forehead down to his jawline in neat straight lines doing down, his skin soft and warm, the look when he closes his eyes so innocent and pure,  • Get you a soft man,

• It makes your hand tingle and you’re heart race at the close proximity, standing on your tiptoes and resting a hand on his shoulder for support,  • It’s only when you’ve finished do you realise his is now pretty much identical to yours,  • WhoOps ACcIDenTS HaPPEn,  • But he still looks damn cute,  • And you know a fancam of this will be all over the internet later,  • Hey; you may even share it on a private account who can say?????  • And wow if you don’t continue to spend the rest of the ISAC’s together, taking stupid pictures with people and giving the internet a heart attack,  • By the end of the day it seems almost all idols have some sort of facepaint?  • A star or a couple of lines of just a smudge done by a member of their group,  • A trend starter?  • But you’re all leaving the arena with the SqUAD,  • But then a hand gently takes your wrist and Daniel leads you to the side of the corridor with your group mates sending teasing smirks over the shoulder to you,  • With a shy smile he holds out a piece of paper folded neatly and you can see the outline of numbers written on it,  • You laugh lightly, taking the paper and carefully tucking it into your pocket,  • “Text me when you get home?”  • You nod, knowing you’ll spend too long deciding whether to say 'heya’ or 'hi’ and then make a split second decision and put something else entirely,  • And Daniel is just way too cute for you to take,  • He makes a move to leave, eyes hovering over you, before slowly leaning over and gently placing his lips on your forehead, ever so sweet, before nodding, smiling quickly and sliding away

[queenburd]

Good Night.

Trilby is running. The hard uneven ground beneath him slides as if alive, as he twists--ducks--jumps over vines and branches thick as his torso. Light leaks unevenly through the wide leaves, speckling and blinding him every so often--it's not important. He's running blind, but it's not important because he's not running toward anything so much as he's running away, away from the noise.

His feet thud hard against the branch he bounds off of, and the bark pricks and tears at his skin. His jaw hurts from how tight he's clenching it. He keeps going, even though he's sure his feet are bleeding as sure as he knows that if he slows, if Trilby stops for even a fraction of a second, the sound thudding in his ears that's like his own heart but not quite his own--

If it catches him--

If he catches him--

he's done for.

His eyes sting. The jungle tries to slow him-- leaves in his face, twigs in his hair. He's covered head to toe in scratches he doesn't remember getting because he's been here so long he's lost track of the hows, and the whys, and the whos, and the jungle is so full of monsters it doesn't matter how he got the scratches, he's just lucky none of them were the one to kill him.

"I wasn't finished talking to you, brat."

The voice is so loud it must be next to him--Trilby starts, stumbles, falls as his foot catches in the knots of the jungle floor and twists and cracks horribly. He screams.

The thumping, thudding of the heartbeat that's not his heart deafens him. The silhouette that blocks out the sun is wide.

Kass jerks. His chest rises and falls rapidly with his breaths--he shudders hard, once, twice. His eyes focus and unfocus on the ceiling, dark, streaked with yellow light from the lamppost outside. He feels the tension of his shoulders and his back.

He feels sick, and stuck, and he can't move for what feels like an eternity. The blanket on his abdomen seems heavy enough to trap him.

When he finally finds the power to move, Kass shuffles onto his side and thumbs his phone. The brightness causes him to squint sharply, crinkled almost enough to close.

1:22, it tells him.

He feels terrible. His eyes hurt--his head hurts. His chest is tight.

Kass curls up tightly, then sits upright. When he stands, he takes a second to catch his balance, and blindly finds his glasses and zipup. A quick feel to confirm his cigarettes are in the pocket, and then Kass slips out his bedroom, down the hall and stairs in the dark.

The kitchen light is on. As his eyes adjust, he peeks in. May is sitting in a chair at the table, her head in her hands. The kettle is on the stove, steam beginning to rise from the spout.

Fuck. Right, she worked a closing shift tonight, so said the little whiteboard calendar she had set on the fridge. Mm.

As he pads into the kitchen, May looks up. She looks as bad as he feels, her hands the only things holding her head up. She waves. Kass makes some gesture of recognition, and trods to the window, sliding it open. It's cold out. He pulls out a cigarette, and then sits beside her.

"Light?"

"Mm," May replies distantly, then snaps her fingers and holds up the flame. He lights his stick, blows the smoke away from her face.

"Thanks."

"Mm."

"Thought you closed an hour ago."

"S'prom season. Fuckers ripped the store apart. Took that long to clean up--we still weren't done, we just couldn't afford to stay."

May sounds damn awful. The kettle begins to sing, and Kass stands and takes it off the burner, leaning on the countertop in front of the window.

"Why're you up?"

Kass makes a noncommital noise. "Couldn't fall asleep," he lies.

"Want some melatonin gummies?"

Had he had the energy, Kass would make some comment about the oxymoron. He would be a shit, and say something about immature adults needing damn gummies.

"Nah," he says. "S'fine."

As he looks out the window, Kass feels the cold. It's started to rain. He feels the air leave all his chest, and pours the hot water into the mug May had already prepared for herself.

"Oh, um, hey. Lemme. I'll be right back. Stay put."

Kass turns, and May is dragging herself out of kitchen. When she comes back, she's holding something flat and gray.

"Mab brought him back yesterday night--wanted to surprise you then, but didn't see you."

She hands Kass the little device.

"Apparently he asked her to hang onto him until you showed up again."

Kass doesn't say anything, looking from her to the PDA in his hands, to her again. He pulls his cigarette out of his mouth and puts it out in the sink, and tosses it into the disposal drain. His throat is dry.

"Hi, Frank," he says hoarsely.

"There he is," Frank says, and fuck, fuck him, Kass missed that voice. "Hello Trilby. It's good to have you back again."

His face hurts--really, really hurts. He realizes he's smiling.

May smiles back at the two of them, and picks up her mug and sits back in her chair. "M'going to sleep in a sec here. But--he and I talked a little."

"Nice young lady, that, er, that April--"

She makes a scandalized noise--

"­May, right, May, sorry dear girl."

Kass is making little wheezing noises, and he realizes he's almost laughing. Fuck, hell, he's tired, and he doesn't know why his chest feels light and painful at the same time. He's holding his idiot little PDA like a lifeline.

"Anyway. Gang's all here. I'm gonna crash. My feet fuckin' hurt. Get the window before you go, 'kay?"

He nods. May limps away, out into the dark hallway. He leans with his back against the counter, and just looks Frank, looks him over, examining for new scratches. Oh, certainly, he'll give him a piece of his mind later, the little twat, for going off with the awful winged bitch, but hell. He's got his only friend back.

"I see you're still as tightlipped as ever. I heard you've been on quite the adventure," Frank says. His tone doesn't disguise the sort of tension that Kass can't really place. He doesn't need to. "I certainly wish I'd been there to see it."

He feels--hot, and cold, and light in the chest and tight all at the same time. He presses the PDA close to his breast, now that there's no one to witness the weakness.

"I came back to get you. I--"

"No apologies or excuses tonight, Trilby. It's late. Let's you head to bed, and we'll talk more in the morning when you're up to it, alright?"

He shivers, and nods frantically. "Okay. Hang on a tic."

Kass turns. He shuts the window and flicks off the kitchen light, and walks up the stairs in the dark with his pocket weighted down with two and a half ounces of plastic and specter.

"And, as a note, I've put in a little reminder here in your calendar to give that girl a proper thank you. Don't think I didn't miss it, sir."

Oh, christ, that would usually be so damn annoying, but he nearly laughs again. "Right. Can't get anything past you, can I."

"No you certainly can not."

And, of course, the irony flies right over the little thing's head. Kass pulls him out of his pocket and sets him beside his phone on the night stand. He tosses his zipup aside, and lies on his side in the bed that’s his but not his.

"Frank?"

"What is it, Trilby?"

He feels, for a moment, a bit like a child. He closes his eyes.

"I came back for you. I mean it."

There's a little static of a sigh. "I believe you, Trilby. Go to sleep."

"M'sorry," he mumbles. "Night."

"....Good night."

Frank begins to hum, ever so softly. Kass sleeps, and does not dream.

(x)

[unidentifiedanonfics]

Catch Of The Day: Bucky Barnes Birthday Drabble

Warnings: So much cheese and fluff, fluffiest thing I've probably ever written, no smut here

Pairing(s): James "Bucky" Barnes x Reader

Summary: Prompts 7 & 45 requested anonymously from this list (7. "You are not cutting my hair! No one is cutting my hair! Nobody even look at my hair!" 45. "Well this isn't the WORST vacation we've ever had.")

***

Bucky didn't think this was normal. He knew he was relatively new to the ways and happenings of the 21st century, but he was still pretty sure that mermaids weren't normal.

And if Steve's reaction was anything to go by? He was right.

Everyone had decided to take a team vacation to Tony's place in Florida and everything had been going great; they were two days in and they hadn't run into anything that would require a call to SHIELD.

Until Sam suggested some deep sea fishing.

Bucky should've known Wilson was going to ruin this vacation for him.

It was only Steve, Sam, Clint, Thor, and himself; the rest of the team either didn't have the patience for fishing or had decided to do something else. Everything had started out great; just a couple of guys, drinks in hand, poles in the water. Until Bucky's fishing line was pulled.

"Quick! Start reeling it in!" Clint exclaimed, grabbing a net.

"Whattaya think I'm doin' here?" Bucky snapped, straining to reel in the (apparently massive) fish.

"Use your other arm! That hunk of metal has to be good for something!" Sam piped up.

Bucky shot him a glare but did as he said anyways, the plates in his arm shifting as it went to work.

"Is there supposed to be blood in the water like that?" Thor quietly asked Steve, brows furrowing in concern as the normally blue water took on a red hue.

"I-" Steve started, tilting his head in confusion.

"I think I see something!" Clint shouted excitedly, leaning over the side of the boat to look into the water.

Suddenly something launched itself over the side of the boat, causing all of the heroes to jump back. As their eyes widened and their jaws dropped, the woman on the deck continued to squirm and snap her teeth at the fishing line wrapped around her body.

"Is that...?" Steve asked, letting his question hang in the air.

"I..." Clint frowned, not sure if he wanted to answer the unasked question.

"It seems Asgard and earth might not be so different after all!" Thor said, smiling joyfully.

Suddenly they were all talking at once; Steve was on the phone, Thor was talking about Asgardian mermaids, Clint was singing 'Under The Sea', and Sam was panicking.

Bucky took a moment to take in the creature. Her hair was magnificent (Bucky now understood why mermaids were often depicted grooming themselves), her skin was still wet with salt water giving her a dewy glow, but her most striking feature was her long, graceful fishtail. The mermaid carried a bag that looked like it was woven from seaweed, it’s contents jingling every time she thrashed. There were several scars along her right side and lower back (one of which Bucky could distinctly recognize as having come from a harpoon), but Bucky tried to keep his gaze away from her nude torso as best he could; mermaid or human, he was still a gentleman. The mermaid continued to struggle but it only made the fishing line tighten around her and cut into her skin.

"Yeah," Steve murmured into his phone, "I think we might have a situation."

"Widely respected and feared..." Thor explained.

"DARLING IT'S BETTER DOWN WHERE IT'S WETTER!" Clint wailed.

"What does this even mean?!" Sam asked, "Are we being attacked from the damn ocean now?!"

The most beautiful voice cut through the chaos, silencing them all.

"No, but if you don't free me this instant, I shall unleash the wrath of the seven seas upon you!"

Thor and Sam each took a large step back (as if that would protect them), Clint picked up the next verse, and Steve had resumed his phone conversation with a slightly panicked tone.

Bucky glared at them and knelt down, unable to watch her bleed out as the fishing line broke her skin.

"My name's Bucky, to help you I need you to stop struggling." Bucky said, crawling slowly across the deck towards the mermaid as if she were a frightened animal.

"Why? So that you can skin my tail?" The mermaid said, sending Bucky a harsh glare.

"No, more so because if you bleed out on this deck my buddy's gonna have me out here with my toothbrush, getting the stains out of the wood." Bucky chuckled, slowly pinching a piece of fishing line in between two fingers and carefully beginning to untangle it.

"So ... you plan to release me?" The mermaid said, tilting her head to the side (Bucky tried not to notice how cute she looked when she did that).

"Well you're not exactly what we were fishing for." Bucky smirked, "Though I can't say I'm disappointed; you're quite the catch, doll."

A blush flooded the mermaids cheeks and a laugh bubbled out of her throat as she tossed her head back, "That was truly awful."

Bucky snickered, "It was pretty bad, wasn't it?"

"I wouldn't - OW!" The mermaid cut off with a wince as Bucky pulled a bit too harshly.

"I'm sorry, it seems to be caught in your hair. Hang on, I think we may have some scissors in one of the tackle boxes. Hey! Sam!" Bucky turned away but was stopped as the mermaid gripped his arm tightly.

"You are not cutting my hair! No one is cutting my hair! Nobody even look at my hair!" The mermaid said, eyes wide with panic and her grip tightening (it probably would've been painful if she hadn't grabbed his metal arm).

Bucky raised his hands in a gesture of surrender, "Okay, it's okay! We won't cut it out. But I'm going to need you to be very still so I don't hurt you or pull out your hair, okay?"

After gaining a nod of approval from the mermaid, Bucky set to the tedious task of untangling the line. The mermaid continued to shoot him suspicious looks, but eventually relaxed as he worked his fingers through her hair while he untangled the line.

“So, you are a fisherman then?” The mermaid asked, her voice much softer than when she’d previously spoke.

“Ah, no ma’am, ‘fraid not. I’m just on vacation.” Bucky replied.

“Hey Buck, we’re heading below deck, holler if you need anything.” Clint said, following Sam, Thor, and Steve to the lower deck,leaving Bucky alone with the mermaid.

“My apologies for having ruined the festivities.” The mermaid said, looking away shamefully.

“Aw, doll, you didn’t ruin nothin’.” Bucky said hurriedly, tilting her face back in his direction with the tip of his finger on her chin, ”Well this isn't the WORST vacation we've ever had. Nah, if anything you’ve made these “festivities” much more interesting.”

The mermaid smiled softly, “Thanks, that’s very kind of you to say.”

“I’m not just saying it; I mean it.” Bucky said sincerely.

The mermaid stared into Bucky’s eyes; memorizing every shade and fleck of color in them, in hopes that she’d never forget such kind eyes.

Bucky coughed, breaking her gaze. As much as he liked having the beautiful woman’s attention, he knew better than to get attached.

“So,what do you do for a living if you’re not a fisherman?” The mermaid asked after a long moment of silence.

I’m a … uh, soldier.” Bucky said; he doubted the mermaid knew of the Avengers and he wasn’t keen on claiming the title of hero to begin with.

“You don’t sound too confident there, Soldier Bucky.” The mermaid commented.

“It’s a long story.” Bucky replied.

“I’m not going anywhere anytime soon.” The mermaid said, raising a brow.

“Fair enough…” Bucky smirked, then went on to explain the least gruesome version of his story that he could.

“So that is why your arm is metal?” The mermaid asked, tracing the plates of his metal arm curiously.

“Yeah; I mean, it’s not something I’m necessarily proud of, but it is a part of me.” Bucky replied, blushing as she touched his arm.

“You must have the spirit of a warrior to have survived all of that. Where I come from, you would be celebrated and cherished.” The mermaid smiled brightly, and Bucky tried to ignore the fact that his heart skipped a beat at the sight.

“Maybe I should visit you sometime then.” Bucky laughed.

The mermaid’s eyes lit up at the possibility, “I would like that very much.”

“So what about you?” Bucky asked after a moment of silence, “How did you come to get tangled in my fishing line?”

“I got into a fight with my parents; I’ve known what I was destined to do my entire life, trained for it. But that doesn’t mean I want it. For once I just want to be a little normal; I want to make friends, paint my scales, wear something elegant, experience my first kiss, walk among humans for once in my life instead of avoiding them entirely ... I know it must sound bratty or unreasonable to some. But my destiny, my purpose; it’s all I’ve ever known, why shouldn’t I be allowed to know more?” The mermaid said, “My parents don’t think so, they are adamant on me fulfilling my purpose. So after confronting them, I decided to just start swimming. I didn’t really know where I was going or even when I was going to stop, which resulted in me not paying attention and getting caught in your line.”

“If it’s any consolation, you’re all untangled now.” Bucky smiled, holding up all the bloodied fishing line.

“I don’t think I can ever thank you enough, Soldier Bucky.” The mermaid smiled, stretching freely.

“Aw, it’s nothin’-” Bucky started, but was cut off as the mermaid captured his lips with her own in the most dazzling kiss Bucky had ever felt. Bucky’s arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her flush against his chest to deepen the kiss.

“Buck!” Steve coughed, glancing away with a blush and causing the mermaid and the soldier to pull back slightly.

“What?” Bucky asked dazedly, honestly having forgotten that there were other people on the planet, let alone the boat.

“I just got off the phone with SHIELD, we’ve been ordered to take her back to shore.” Steve said, turning towards the front of the boat.

“What? You said you’d let me go!” The mermaid exclaimed, gripping Bucky’s t-shirt in fear.

“Steve, we can’t take her to SHIELD. You know what will happen to her if they get a hold of her.” Bucky said, his grip tightening on the mermaid protectively.

“It’s not SHIELD that wants her.” Steve said, “It’s Bruce Wayne.”

Suddenly the sky began to darken, rain and hail falling in torrents, the waves roared, and the water bubbled. Bucky looked down at the mermaid questioningly as she let out a string of expletives.

“Don’t worry, it’s just a little storm.” Bucky said, attempting to shield her from the hail as she was still injured.

“No, it’s not.” The mermaid said, sadness lacing her voice and filling her eyes.

As if on cue, a deep, booming voice spoke from the sea.

“Y/N CURRY! YOU WILL STOP THIS FOOLISHNESS AND COME HOME. NOW!”

 This is the first of Bucky's Birthday Drabbles! I always like hearing what you guys think, so feel free to let me know what you thought HERE! I might make a sequel if anyone wants one because I did leave this on a bit of a cliffhanger. I also realize these are incredibly late and I haven't posted anything is a few forevers so please forgive me!

[rebeccatonkin]

Forelsket. *Shawn Mendes*

Teacher!Shawn Mendes

Forelsket: (Norwegian)

-That overwhelming euphoric feeling you experience when you’re falling in love with someone.

WARNING: there’s smut in this imagine!

I wish very much that I could hold your face in my two hands and kiss your mouth.

*Y/N’s pov*

Fuck.

The spotlight is messing with my head and my heart. There he is. Standing in the middle of it. All my attention is on him. I’m gawking at him as if he were a king, or a very enchanting, handsome, young man.

The bright light is blinding me but his appearance is killing me. His brown hair is perfectly styled in a small quiff. It looks soft and lush and it makes me want to slowly run my hands through it. His hair does look a little messy though but it’s the good kind of messy, the kind where it looks very sexy and irresistible.

His eyes, his warm brown eyes are shining ever so brightly. The dark-coloured eyelashes adorn his eyelids and touch his cheeks each time he blinks. His skin is glowing, along with the blush adorning his cheeks.

He looks like a real God to me. There are flaws in his face and in his body but to me his flaws are perfect. I find his slightly pink-tinged cheeks adorable whereas other people don’t like it. I find his shoulders perfect the way they are, they’re not very broad, they’re just the right width. And even though they’re not extremely broad, the fabric slightly strains at his shoulders.

His legs are long and thin and they look hot in his black suit pants and when he puts his hands in the pockets, I can’t help but find him mysterious.

His torso, cladded in a white dress shirt, resembles that one from an athlete, a hidden prominent v-line and defined abs. How I wish I could run my hands down his chest and stomach.

I’m trying to turn my head, I’m trying to look away but for some reason, I simply can’t. My breath has been taken away ever since he stepped into that bright light. I try to control my irregular breaths but it’s hard when my heart is almost leaping out of my chest.

My eyes follow his every move as he looks at his surroundings and spots some of his friends in the back near the bar. He makes his way through the crowd and pats the backs of his best friends in a way of greeting them. I watch him order something at the bar and seconds later he’s holding a pint in his right hand. He’s happily talking with his best mates, having the time of his life when drinking the beer he’s just ordered.

“Hey, you’ve been staring at nothing for minutes now, you okay?” Nothing. I wouldn’t consider him as nothing. “Y/N?” my best friend says in a sing-song voice. “Huh?” I blink twice and shake my head slightly before looking at my best friend. “Finally, I almost thought you were paralysed or something,” she chuckles and sips of her Mojito. “Oh, uh no, I was uh, thinking…?” “Thinking about what?” she asks curiously and hands me her Mojito. “Drink and spill.” “Oh, I don’t think so…” “Aww, babe, you’re no fun,” she teases and finishes her Mojito herself. I shrug it off and glance over my shoulder to catch one more glance of him.

I shouldn’t have done that.

I quickly look down and fiddle with my fingers. My cheeks are almost burning. That’s how hot and red they are right now. My heartbeat is beating even faster than before and my fiddling hands get sweatier with every passing second.

He was looking my way. His brown eyes were locked with mine for less than a second. Yet in that half second, I succumbed to how captivating and beautiful and shiny they are.

“Earth to Y/N?” “What?” I snap and look at my slightly wide-eyed best friend. “Sorry, I uh, was thinking again…” “Right… Y/N, are you sure you’re okay?” “Yes, I’m perfectly fine.” I fake a small smile and watch her nod her head yes. “Okay. I’m going to get us some more booze.” “Us? You mean you?” “Whatever, I’ll be right back, party pooper,” she winks at me before walking over to the bar.

The bar…

The bar?

I whip my head around and watch her standing next to him. His brown eyes are giving her a quick look-over and I feel jealousy and hurt enter my veins. I bite my lip and look down, not wanting to see any of this. It’s always the same you see. My best friend is a dancer, she’s confident, easy-going and… she gets all the guys, even if she doesn’t mean to. I, on the other hand, am shy, not so confident, awkward and I hate dancing because I suck at it. I never get any attention from a guy. Never and I don’t think that’s ever going to happen, as depressing as that might sound. I’ve given up.

“There you go,” my best friend says and hands me a plastic cup, filled to the brim with Vodka. “Is this Vodka, what kind of club is this? I don’t want to get in a coma and neither do you,” I say and take the cup from her. “It’s fucking irresponsible to serve this much Vodka,” I mutter and watch my best friend roll her eyes at me. “Y/N, you seriously have to learn to live a little.” “As far as I’m concerned, I’m breathing so I’m very alive.” She chuckles and shakes her head at me as she starts to dance. “Whatever, will you at least dance with me?” she pouts and takes my hands in hers to guide me. “But I’m an awful dancer…” I whine and retract my hands. “Aww, you’re not.” I shake my head no and hear her let out a long sigh. “Come on, Y/N, this is a club, people dance in clubs, besides no-one will judge you or anything, just loosen up and don’t give a fuck about what other people think of you.” “It’s easy for you, I mean you are a professional dancer.” “Don’t pull that card again, there’s a dancer hidden in everyone.” “Y/F/N…” “Y/N…” she mocks me and juts out her bottom lip.

“I’ll try but don’t you dare make fun of me.” “Never, I promise,” she puts two fingers up in the air as if she’s under oath and I give her a grateful smile. I hesitantly begin to sway my hips to the beat and bite my lip. I feel so insecure right now. I try to think of what to do with my hands but let them hang by my sides in the end.

This is so awkward.

“You’re doing great,” Y/F/N cheers and gives me a thumbs up. “Seriously? I’m as stiff as an ironing board…” My best friend laughs slightly but quickly covers it up. “You’re not, now don’t think that low of yourself,” she states. “I’m going to get us two Mojitos, I’ll be right back,” she offers and gives me a thumbs-up. “I can get them-” “Nah uh, you’re going to dance,” she winks and makes her way through the crowd. I huff and cross my arms in front of my chest.

I seriously hate clubs and partying.

“There you go, Y/N,” my best friend says and this time she hands me a plastic cup filled with Mojito. “Thank you,” I mutter and frown at the drink. “It’s good, you should try it.” I look between her pleading eyes and the plastic cup and roll my eyes. “Just one sip,” I say and put the cup against my lips.

Seconds later, I’m craving water to get rid of this horrendous aftertaste and to soothe the burning in my throat. I pull a face of disgust as I get rid of the awful drink and sigh deeply. “This is not my cup of tea…” “I guess dancing it is then,” Y/F/N chuckles and takes my hands in hers once again. I reluctantly begin to sway my hips and send her a hesitant look.

“I’m way too awkward for this…” “No, you’re not, you’re doing great actually.” “And you, my friend, are a horrible liar.” I watch Y/F/N roll her eyes at me and throw her hands up in the air. The way she moves is amazing, how I wish I could do all of that, but no, my body and mind refrain from it.

“I need to pee, I’ll be right back! Although, I saw this hottie near the toilets, might as well have some fun!” Y/F/N yells over the music. I roll my eyes and watch her down yet another drink before pushing past people to get to the toilets or that hottie…

I blow my hair out of my face and stop dancing all together. This is not my scene at all. I guess I’ll start dancing again when she’s back… which might take a while…

My mind goes back to the way too handsome guy and I can’t help but have another peek. But much to my dismay, he’s gone.

I feel a rather sad feeling creep up my spine and lower my head. It’d be nice to just have one more look at him but I guess that won’t happen.

He’s probably dancing with a very attractive girl right now. A girl that is capable of moving her hips in a sexy way. I always look like I’m hula hooping…

I decide to try it out and shake my hips when I look down at myself, I am indeed exaggeratedly gyrating my hips. I look stupid… I quickly halt all movements and fiddle with my fingers once again. I feel the heat rise to my cheeks and sigh defeated. I am never going to seduce anyone by dancing. That’s for sure.

I am sure your kisses could feed me: I could live on the sustaining elegance of their touch. A warmth and sweetness would fill my mouth, a wine of such eloquence, no speech, no words would dare to imitate.

Out of the blue, I feel two hands touch my hips on either side and move them from the left to the right by guiding me. “What the fu-” I’m about to turn around and slap this guy’s face until I see a mop of messy brown hair and a pale face with warm brown eyes out of the corner of my eye. I feel his hot breath tickle my neck. This can’t be true.

I blink twice and bite my lip. I let out a ragged breath and lick my lips, not knowing what to do or say. “Relax, I’m no murderer or anything, just let me help you a little.” His voice is deep and enchanting, just like I thought it would be. I smell the faint scent of beer and chewing gum when he speaks and I try not to lose all my senses.

Once I’ve found my calm and gathered a little courage I open my mouth to speak. “Help me uh, with what e-exactly?” Damn it, I had almost said a whole sentence without stuttering but I guess fate really hates me. I embarrassedly lower my head and step out of his grasp yet he quickly pulls me back by my hips. “Don’t hide,” he whispers in my ear and I feel his cheek faintly touch my neck.

The music is loud, way too loud for my liking, yet everything he whispers is clear. “I-uh-I” I mentally slap myself for screwing up. He must think I’m one foolish girl right now. However, a low chuckle slips passed his lips and I furrow my eyes in confusion. “You’re cute.” “I- what?” The brown-haired boy winks at me before he pulls me closer to his body. My back is faintly touching his chest whereas his hands are still firmly holding my hips. “Follow my lead,” he whispers softly and gently guides my hips from the left to the right so that I’m somehow shaking my butt without gyrating them as if I’m in the middle of a hula-hoop-session. “Fuck, you’re good,” he mumbles under his breath, it was below a whisper yet I heard.

I feel a warm, electric sort of sensation travel down my spine and blush like never before.

“What’s your name?” he asks and slightly taps my hips as if they were piano keys. “Y/N.” He hums softly and continues to guide my hips in a very gentle way. “Well, Y/N, I saw you looking at me, a while ago…” he trails off and I can hear the smirk in his voice. Once again my cheeks turn red and the rhythm of the beating of my heart accelerates. “You-you saw uh that?” “Mmh, I did, yes.” “Oh, God…” He laughs softly before slowly running his hands up my sides. “You okay with this?” he whispers and now purposely caresses my cheek with his. I swallow deeply and shyly nod my head yes. He continues to slowly run his hands up and down my side, it’s so slow that it’s almost considered teasing. I let out a silent yet content sigh and much to my surprise he heard or saw it and deliberately slows down his movements, now this is teasing for sure.

My body feels on fire and his every touch feels so intense and addictive and heavenly. I close my eyes as he gently pulls me closer to him so that our bodies are now fully touching. I feel his firm chest and stomach against my back, his hands do not stop guiding me, they continue to gently help me sway my hips from the left to the right. He lets out a hiss and I quickly stop moving. Did I do something wrong? “Please don’t stop,” he whispers and lingers his lips on my earlobe. It almost sounded like begging. The desperateness in his voice makes my knees go weak and before I can wrap my mind around it I blurt out what’s on my mind. “But- I- you hissed…” I whisper embarrassed. I feel his chest rumble as he chuckles softly. “Because you’re making me feel amazing, that’s why, don’t think that you’re doing anything wrong because you aren’t. It’s quite the contrary actually. You’re making me feel things no-one has ever made me feel.” “No-one?” “No-one but you,” he whispers in my ear and pushes my hair to the side. He then faintly kisses the crook of my neck. I involuntarily let out a big, happy sigh and slightly throw my head back. “You’re messing up my mind,” he whispers and kisses me again in the same spot. He’s messing up my mind, I believe.

“Y/N,” he whispers slowly and gently holds my hips again. “Mmh?” “Wanna get out of here?” I feel my breath hitch in my throat and cough slightly, I quickly grab one of the plastic cups near me and gulp it down. My eyes grow wide once my throat starts to burn and I realise I drank all of the Vodka from earlier. “Shit…” I mutter under my breath and fiddle with my fingers. “Am I going to end up in a coma now?” I hear laughter coming from beside me and watch the most handsome guy ever doubled over with laughter. “What?” He shakes his head softly and tries to compose himself yet the crinkles beside his eyes tell me he’s finding it difficult. “You’re too cute, you. And believe me when I say that you’re not going to end up in a coma because of that one cup of Vodka.” “You sure?” “Very sure.” I take in a deep breath and finally calm down a bit. “So what do you say?” he asks and shyly fiddles with his fingers. I nod agreeing and bite my lip. His eyes flicker to my mouth and he sucks in a deep breath. He then gently intertwines our fingers and leads me through the crowd.

I watch his friends in the distance point at us whilst grinning widely and I somehow feel a wave of proudness wash over me. After all, he’s holding my hand, he kissed me and he called me cute. Twice.

Once we get out of the club, he wraps an arm around my shoulders. “I’m staying at a hotel not too far away from here if you want we can go there?” “A hotel?” “Yeah, I’m here for work… I’m a teacher and I received a job offer so here I am. I just haven’t found a place to stay yet.” “I see. What do you teach?” “English literature, and before you judge me, it’s not boring at all.” “I don’t judge,” I chuckle and lean my head on his shoulder. “I’m dizzy,” “It’s because of the Vodka, you’re a lightweight and I don’t think you’re the drinking type, are you?” “No, I actually don’t drink alcohol…” “Mmh. The dizziness will subdue in a bit,” he whispers carefully and pecks my forehead. His brown eyes are filled with concern and I can’t help but stare into them. His eyes lock with mine and flicker to my lips every now and then until he closes the gap and kisses my lips. I eagerly wrap my hands around his neck and kiss him back with the same intensity and passion. I gently play with the soft hairs at the nape of his neck and feel a rush of warmth run through my veins as he moans softly. He then carefully enters his tongue in my mouth and explores it. I can taste the beer and faint taste of chewing gum and I close my eyes as he holds me tight at my waist. His head then dips even lower as he trails a path of wet kisses down my jaw, my neck and collarbones. “Oh my god,” I pant heavily and run my hands up and down his back. I look at him, into his eyes to find them already staring at me. “Is it still far, that hotel?” I breathe heavily as he nibbles on my earlobe. “It’s that building over there,” he mutters and points his index finger to a huge building a couple of yards away from where we are and I stare up at it in awe, then at him. “Teachers get paid a lot…” I mumble and kiss and suck on his jaw. “Not really,” he groans and takes my hand in his, he rubs small, soothing circles with this thumb and pulls me flush against his chest. “Let’s hurry,” he smirks and drags me with him. I giggle softly and let him lead me to his hotel room.

Your mouth invites kisses as honey in the comb invites tasting: as red, crisp apples want biting; as the cool, orange- yellow of peach and nectarine seek to be sipped, nipped, licked and savored.

“Room 346,” I mumble whilst he tries to insert the key in the keyhole. He hums confirming and furrows at the key in his hands. “Stupid piece of metal,” he curses and frustratingly runs a hand through his luscious brown hair. “Why does it not- ah finally,” he smiles in victory as he unlocks the door and pulls me in with him. He then kicks the door shut and throws the keys on a smile table. I chuckle at his eagerness and bite my lip when I watch him take off his shoes and throw his black leather jacket on the couch. He then catches me standing there, gawking at him as if he's Zeus himself and a smirk finds its way onto his face.

He slowly steps closer to me and looks me up and down. I feel the air leave my lungs and swallow deeply when his face and body are only inches away from mine. “Can I take this off?” he whispers huskily and tugs at the black leather jacket that I’m wearing. I nod confirming and let him slide it off. “And these?” he whispers as he crouches down in front of me and touches my black heels. I nod once again, not trusting my own voice at the moment. He slightly lifts my left foot and takes off my black heel, then he does the same to my right foot.

He then gets back up and bites his lip when looking at me. “Can I take this off?” he breathes heavily and points to the black dress I’m wearing. I lick my lips and look in his eyes. They’re so captivating and beautiful. He faintly presses his lips to mine, then he simply presses them on mine but doesn’t move. I watch his dark-coloured eyelashes touch his cheeks once his eyes are closed and close mine as well. He cups my face whilst I finally run my fingers through his brown locks. I sigh with delight at how soft his hair is and gently tuck the ends. “You’re driving me insane,” he whispers and dips his head so he can kiss my shoulders and collarbones. “So are you,” I whisper and rest my forehead on his shoulder. “Can I take this off?” he asks again and runs his hands up and down my sides. “Yes.” I feel his hands travel to the back of my neck, where my zipper is. He then suddenly turns me around and kisses the back of my neck. “You’re so gorgeous.” I moan softly at his words and wait for him to take off my dress. I feel his rough fingertips touch my skin as he wipes my hair to the side. He then slowly and teasingly unzips my dress. My breathing quickens again as he licks a long wet stripe down my spine. He travels back up by placing open-mouthed kisses on my skin and my back arches automatically. The dress is now hanging on my hips. His hands are placed on top of it and before I can say something about it, he turns me around again. He gets down on both knees so that his face is levelled with my panties. He looks up at me with those amazingly warm eyes and I shyly nod confirming. He quickly pecks my stomach before shimmying down my dress. He sucks in a deep breath as he looks at my white panties and bra.

He then gets back on his feet and gently takes my hand in his. He leads me to the huge bed in the middle of the room and carefully lifts me up. I instinctively wrap my legs around his waist and my arms around his neck and smile softly at him. “Are you alright?” he asks sweetly and holds me tight. “Yes.” “Good.” And with that, he lays me down on the bed with him hovering over me. I watch him quickly take off his bow tie and throw it away. “This needs to come off as well,” I whisper and slowly unbutton the first button. I watch him look down at my hands as they unbutton his white dress shirt.

Once the final button is done, I slide down the white dress shirt and take in his appearance. Fuck. His chest is perfect to me. It’s pale with abs and a prominent v-line, he’s strong and everything is just right. I run my hands down his chest and place kisses everywhere. I can tell he enjoys it because when I quickly glance at him, his eyes are shut. He seems to be in pure bliss. “Y/N, I need you.” I bite my lip when our eyes lock and nod in agreement. He lowers his face until his lips reach mine and he takes my hand in his. He guides it to his black suit pants and wets his lips. I blush a bit when I take them off and throw them away. He then lowers his face once more and passionately captures my lips with his. I moan softly when he tugs on my lower lip and wrap my arms around him. “I need you too.”

With that, he unclasps my bra and takes off my panties. “Fuck, baby,” he groans as his eyes savour my body. “Fuck, you’re so-so perfect,” he whispers and kisses me for what feels like the hundredth time tonight. His hands carefully take my breasts in his and squeeze them softly. “You’re so perfect to me,” he confesses again and I arch my back from all the pleasure he’s giving me. “A-ah, this feels s-so good,” I moan and throw my head back. “Fuuuck.” His lips suck, bite and pull on both my nipples and I can’t help but feel warm within. It’s like there have been released a thousand and one sparks and they’re now all floating around in my blood. They’re making me feel warm and calm and tingly and it’s just the best feeling ever. It’s like going down a roller coaster with no ending. Butterflies are swarming around in my stomach and it doesn’t stop, they keep on fluttering in circles.

He then crawls backwards so that his face is right above the place where my panties used to be. “Can I?” “Yes, please.” He groans deeply and places his hands on my hips to stop me from squirming too much. “I’m going to make you feel good, love.” “I’m going to do what I’ve wanted to do ever since I caught you staring at me,” he whispers and lowers his head until his lips reach my clit. “Ever s-since?” I pant, my chest is heavily going up and down and I needily run my hands through his luscious locks. “Ever since,” he confirms and licks a long wet stripe up my clit. “Oh-my!” I gasp and tightly hold onto his hair. He then mercilessly starts sucking on my clit. I try to find a release but there’s none. He’s restraining my hips from moving, he’s mercilessly sucking on my bundle of nerves, harshly nipping and sucking on it as if his life depended on this. I’m a sweaty, moaning mess. I’ve been tugging on his hair the moment his mouth attached to my clit. “Fuck, I-I’m c-close.” “Hold it, baby, a little longer,” he mutters and I feel his nose touch my pubic bone. “I-I-” “On one,” he whispers and licks and laps up my clit. “10.” I gasp when I feel the vibrations run up and down my spine as he hums against my clit. “9.” “8.” “7.” I’m tugging on his hair like there is no tomorrow, my back is arching off the bed with every word he speaks and my hips buck up but he’s quick to press them back against the soft mattress. “6.” “5.” “4.” “Three more to go, baby.” “Ah, fuck…” “3.” “2.” “You’re almost there.” “Just- please, please, let me come, I-” “1.” I feel all the warmth and adrenaline rushing through my body. Stars cloud my vision and my eyes roll to the back of my head. I tightly hold onto his hair and let out loud heavy moans. He continues to suck me through my orgasm and I find my legs becoming numb. “I-ahh, I-” I give up trying to find the words and simply let him clean me up. The tight knot in my stomach is gone but there is still a very pleasant feeling present.

“I want to fuck you,” he whispers and bumps my nose with his. “W-what are you w-waiting for then?” “Your permission,” he grins and kisses my lips. I can taste myself on the tip of his tongue and cup his face. “Can I fuck you, Y/N?” “Yes,” I pant and reattach our lips. Soon he breaks apart and leaps out of bed, only to return seconds later with a foil packet. “Safety first,” he grins and opens the packet with his teeth. How did I become so lucky? The hottest and sweetest guy on earth is looking at me as if I’m someone and not no-one. I can’t describe the feeling but I surely know that I don’t ever want it to stop. I want this to last forever.

“Y/N?” “Huh, sorry, I zoned out, I was uh thinking…” “I noticed, you were looking at the ceiling as if it was a sky full of stars…” he chuckles and runs a thumb down my cheek. “Are you okay, though?” he asks worriedly. “Yes.” “You very sure?” “I’m very sure.” A grin lights up his face as he sweetly and lovingly kisses my lips. “Tell me if you want me to stop here, Y/N.” I quickly shake my head and furrow my eyebrows at him. “I don’t want to stop,” I confess and feel the heat run to my cheeks. His grin widens even more if that’s possible and I see his eyes twinkle when he looks down at me. His eyes are like a sky full of stars, a brown-coloured sky with the brightest stars on display.

“So, uh, can I? You know…?” He looks down at his hard on and I blink twice and look up at him. He’s blushing heavily and a few brown locks have fallen in front of his eyes. I nod confirming at him and twirl one short brown strand of hair around my finger. “If I hurt you, tell me right away, okay?” “Okay.” He nervously bites his lip and lines up his hard on with my entrance. He gives me one final look to which I smile reassuringly and he then slowly and gently pushes inside of me. I clench my eyes shut and fist the sheets. “Shit-sorry, I- want me to stop?” He’s already pulling out slightly but I quickly shake my head. “No, don’t, please don’t. I just need some time to adjust.” “O-okay, tell me if you want me to move, though.” I nod my head once again and wait for the burning pain to fade away. “Y-you can move.” He nods his head understanding and quickly pushes his length inside of me. I let out a big sigh once the pain begins to leave and smile softly up at him. He returns the gesture and cups my cheek. “You’re perfect, Y/N.” I blush heavily and pull him down so that his chest is faintly touching mine. “Please fuck me.” “On it,” he whispers and gently jerks his hips forward.

“Oh!” He keeps pushing into me at a slow, steady pace. I’m a moaning mess and so is he. I run my nails down his back and watch him close his eyes in bliss. “Fuck, princess,” he groans and heavily breathes in and out. “You’re so good,” I whisper and kiss his chest. “Only for you,” he winks playfully and slightly speeds up the pace. “Oh my god…” I moan and feel the burning knot in my stomach tighten again. He continues to pick up his speed and minutes later, he’s pounding into me at an insanely fast pace. My heart is almost leaping out of my chest with every thrust. “You’re so-t-tight,” he moans and buries his face in the crook of my neck. “I’m so close…” I trail off and run my hands down his chest. “Me too, love, me too.” “I can’t hold it a-anymore,” I confess and harshly bite down on my lips to keep myself from screaming. He stares into my eyes and runs a hand through my -now- messy hair. He then flips us over and smirks slightly. “Then finish this, baby.” His voice is hoarse and husky and I can’t help but get even more turned on.

I place my hands on his chest and push myself up and down his length with the last bit of energy. He closes his eyes and his lips part slightly. A frown is etched on his face and I can’t help but take in every single detail of his face. He’s so handsome. His dark-coloured eyelashes, his pale skin, his pink cheeks and his wet pink lips. This young man resembles a god. “Come on, baby,” he pleads desperately and puts his hands on either side of my hips. “I’m almost there and I can tell you are too,” he confesses. “Let me guide you,” he whispers and helps me move up and down. “F-fuck!” I cry and fall down on him. He kisses my forehead as he now jerks his hips up and protectively wraps his arms around my waist. He continues to pound into me and I swear I’m about to explode. “I c-can’t h-hold- ahh!” I cry softly when my muscles contract around his length and I feel him hiss as he comes undone as well. His body is shivering and sweaty as he tiredly lets go.

“Holy shit, Y/N, that was- that was amazing, I have no words for it,” he confesses and pulls out of me. He quickly throws the condom away and lies back down beside me. He pulls me into his side and caresses my hair. I pull the white sheet over our naked bodies and let out a happy sigh. “I feel the same way,” he chuckles and looks down at me. “You do?” “Yes, I’m happy, Y/N, and that’s not just because of the amazing sex we just had.” I hide my face with my hands but feel him pry them off my face. “Nah uh, don’t hide, this is my hotel room, so you have to follow my rules,” he grins mischievously. “And one of my rules is not to hide.” “You serious?” “I’ve never been so serious in my life.” I shake my head at him but smile nonetheless. This is one perfect moment. It’s quiet for a while until he decides to speak up.

“You know, Y/N, that’s what you get when seducing an English-literature teacher. Teachers always set rules,” he smirks and runs his hands up and down my arms. “Hold on, you. Me seducing you? If I recall correctly you were the one who unexpectedly put your hands on my hips.” “I couldn’t stand you being so insecure…” I lift my head off his chest and furrow my eyebrows. “You noticed that?” “Yes.” “Oh…” I frown slightly and look down at the mattress, this is so embarrassing. “But hey, with a little help, you absolutely nailed it,” he tries and puts his index finger under my chin. “I did not, I’m just no dancer-material,” I pout. “Aww, you don’t have to be a professional dancer. Besides, I thought it was really cute. You were trying so hard. It was adorable.” “I’m officially embarrassed,” I mutter and a chuckle slips passed his lips. “Second rule is not to be embarrassed for not being dancer material,” he states solemnly and I shake my head at him. A glint of mischief fills his eyes and before I can wrap my mind around what’s happening, I’m pulled to my feet and he’s humming a song.

His arms are wrapped around my waist as he holds me close and I hesitantly wrap my arms around his neck. “Let’s slow dance, there’s no-one here to judge or laugh. It’s just you and me, naked you and me,” he smirks and gently guides me. “Thank you,” I whisper and rest my head against his shoulder. “My pleasure. Oh and Y/N?” “Yes?” “You’re definitely girlfriend material,” he winks mischievously.

While the kisses of your mouth could nourish me and my soul for eons, no measurable time would pass through the duration of their gift, and lifetimes would endure while I kissed your mouth held between my two hands.

POEM: ‘Kiss: A Touch Or Caress With The Lips’ by Jillian Bee.

6K smut for you!

[professor-riddikulus]

Craigslist - Ch 2

Summary: James and Sirius are looking for a roommate for their Los Angeles house - Remus has just moved from Dublin needs a place to rent while he goes to graduate school. One Craigslist ad later, the three of them find themselves living together and shit is bound to get complicated. Featuring trans Remus and the wonder of Wolfstar.

Author’s Note: I know it has been a long time friends, but I’m back! Hooray summer! I hope to be updating this more regularly now that all those pesky seminar papers are completed. I am sorry for what I assume is going to be the ridiculousness of this chapter. As you probably know, Sirius cannot be contained. Anyway, enjoy! 

You can also read this story on FF.net or Ao3 if your heart desires

It took an hour for Sirius to take a shower and get ready, during which time Padfoot and I watched several episodes of some cracked-out show called The Amazing World of Gumball and I did the cereal dishes that Sirius had left behind. He came jauntily down the stairs, hair tied back and still damp, a loose black muscle tank on that showed too much of his strong tattooed arms, too much of his lean muscled torso. I tried not to stare. I probably failed miserably because he looked pleased with himself.

“I assume,” he said flipping his keys from one hand to another, “that we're not taking the bike?”

“Your motorbike? Nah I don't particularly feel like dying this afternoon.”

He made a noise somewhere between a snicker and an indignant huff.

“Fine the car then. But I warn you, it's a few years old.”

I, of course, assumed that he meant a few years old like Lily meant a few years old when she talked about her 10 year old crappy Prius. What he actually meant was a black Mercedes S-Class that probably cost more than four years of my graduate stipend and that was exactly 3 years old. It was so beautiful that I was actually nervous to sit in the seat. Opulence in most forms makes me uncomfortable -- my parents always made a tidy living but I was always the kid putting away coins for a rainy day. The responsible one. Some people are built to be pampered, can adjust to being treated like kings, to throwing caution to the wind. I never felt comfortable indulging -- instead I was the kid who didn’t want anyone to look at him when they sang a the happy birthday song. It isn’t shyness not really, it’s well, wanting to fly under the radar I suppose. Showing off what you have draws attention.

I just looked at Sirius and I knew this wasn’t him. He stood taller than me but his posture was proud. He wasn’t afraid to take up space, wasn’t afraid to be noticed. He had no idea that taking up that space, taking up oxygen, meant taking it from someone else. I was stiff and trying not to move my dirty shoes too much on the carpet, Sirius on the other hand was completely at ease, his ripped skinny jeans clashing with the dark brown leather of the seats. He was leaned back, reclined like his body itself was used to luxury. Watching him driving the 5 with his sunglasses on, singing along to some mindless pop tune, I had the distinct feeling that Los Angeles was not going to be anything like I expected. Sure they said it was a town for movie stars, but it’s difficult to understand how value works here. Some people have so much they don’t even notice how much they have. Sirius certainly didn’t. This guy, this house, it wasn't like being in another country. I have been to France once, and nobody there even spoke the language that I spoke, yet I still felt like less of an alien. How rich was this guy?

I looked down at my Target t-shirt, one that Lily and I had picked out only a few days before. It was my favorite, but next to the glamour of the car, the palm trees, and the guy sitting next to me I felt distinctly shabby. It wasn’t like I was usually fashion-forward. I do my best to stay at least a bit put together but I’m not a trend-setter. I’m sure his pants cost the same as my whole outfit. Probably more, actually. I tried to shake myself, there was no reason to be ashamed, and in any case he was the one being stupid by buying such an expensive car. I sighed, if I had that kind of money, even a quarter of that kind of money, there are so many other things I’d be doing with it. I’d be giving back to the community, I’d be working for a nonprofit, I’d be paying off my student loans. I’d be doing something, anything, other than buying a car that might be the price of a house anywhere else. The very thought of it made my nerves feel frayed. I was going to be living around this kind of wealth, benefitting from it even.

I looked over at Sirius, whose grin slipped a bit at what must have been a concerned or frustrated look on my face but which he quickly replaced the grin. Perhaps he didn’t want me to see his concern?

“You don’t like Drake? We can change the radio to something else?”

“Don’t worry mate, I’m good. Your car is really something.”

“Yeah it’s pretty okay. I bought it as a graduation present to myself.”

“Oh? Where did you do your undergraduate degree?”

“James and I went to USC together, that’s where you’re going, right?”

“Yeah,” I grinned to myself, I hadn’t even considered that Sirius had gone to college at all somehow, but if he did, USC didn’t surprise me. Lily told me that it had a bit of a reputation for being a school for rich American kids, especially west coast kids -- those Orange County, Beverly Hills, Malibu, rich kids -- someone like Sirius I guess, “I guess you’ll have to show me around at some point.”

“You’ll figure it out quick, s’not a big campus.”

I paused, weighing my options a bit. I chewed the inside of my lip. You’re being a coward Remus Lupin. He’s not going to think anything. “So,” I let the word hang in the air a bit, “do they have, erm, a big queer community there? Like among the undergraduates at least?”

Sirius smirked at me, “Are we gonna have that talk?”

I panicked, “What? What talk?!”

“I mean the, ‘oh-here’s-how-I-came-out’ talk. The ‘I’m-gay-you’re-gay’ talk. The ‘do-you-have-a-boyfriend’ talk.”

“I see no reason why we have to. All that is pretty obvious isn’t it?” I picked at the stray thread sticking out from the knee of my jeans but I could feel him looking back and forth from the road to me, trying to catch my eyes. I was embarrassed for a reason I couldn’t quite explain, sweating a bit, and not because of the heat. He looked at me like he was trying to read me, like he was regarding a particularly interesting painting and he wanted to examine the individual brush strokes. I felt on display under such scrutiny, exposed even, but I forced my eyes back up to his. He wasn’t going to see me squirm. I wasn’t going to let him affect me. He was just some spoiled kid from southern California. I was going to hold my own.

Sirius smiled, “Maybe not that last one. You haven’t picked up some all-American boy, swooned by the lilting accent of Mother Ireland?”

“Excuse me?” I laughed so hard at this abrupt shift that I needed a minute to compose myself, “What even are you?”

“I told you, wolfboy, I’m a star.”

“You’re something, that’s for sure.”

“Something amazing. It’s okay, I understand, words fail you.”

I shook my head at this, how I was supposed to continue the conversation after that, I had no idea. I had the distinct feeling that what was happening was something of a face off. He was taking the measure of me, wanted to see if I was going to keep up with him. It was the same feeling that I had when he fired his ‘interview’ questions at me. It was like dealing with a toddler that wanted to see how far he could push the rules. Luckily, I’m stubborn, and I’ve always loved a challenge. When I didn’t say anything, Sirius didn’t seem to have a hard time filling the void. He probably would have talked to the empty seat if I hadn’t been there.

“Yeah, it’s badass that you’re a big queer though. I was getting annoyed being the only rainbow unicorn in the house. Now we finally outnumber James and his dirty fucking heterosexuality.”

I laughed a little, “Yeah. In case he tries to convert us, strength in numbers and all that.”

“Oh don’t worry, he’s way beyond that. Literally all our friends are queer, he always complains there’s never anyone for him to date because all our female friends are lezzies. Dude that reminds me, we should definitely have a pool party to welcome you to the family.”

Literally anything but a pool party. Pool parties meant swimming which meant swimwear and I didn’t think we were going to be at that point for quite a while, if at all, really.

“I dunno, maybe in a little bit when I get settled and get the furniture built and everything.”

Sirius shrugged and ran a hand along the top of his head, pushing back the strands of dark hair that had fallen around his face, I think it was the first time that I hadn’t seen him smiling and I wondered if I had wounded him, “Yeah, ‘course. Whatever you want.”

We pulled up to the Ikea in Burbank and parked, and Sirius looked at me, wide-eyed and stunned. “Don’t fuck with me Remus, this…” he gestured to the giant blue and yellow building in front of us that was the biggest one I’d ever seen, “this is a fucking furniture store?! It looks like several goddamn airplane hangers put together.”

“Just you wait,” I told him unbuckling my seatbelt, “I have a feeling you’re going to lose it.”

I was not wrong.

“This is fucking NUTS!” Sirius leaned dangerously far over the escalator as we took it up to the second floor to start making our way through the maze of mock rooms that made up the Ikea showroom. I pulled on the back of his shirt, trying not to be distracted by the amount of tan skin this action revealed.

“You’re going to kill yourself. God Sirius don’t lean that far over.”

“Okay Dad sorry.” Sirius snickered but he stopped leaning over the escalator.

When we got to the top Sirius’ eyes lit up as he surveyed the floor full of mock-rooms and tiny apartments. “YOU COULD LIVE HERE!” He nearly ran to the first room, threw himself on the couch and put his feet up on the coffee table. I rolled my eyes and picked up a pencil and pad to record the numbers of the furniture. When I walked over to Sirius he was wiggling his feet and looking incredibly pleased.

“It’s like a goddamn Swedish Disneyland dude.”

I laughed, “And like Disneyland, we’ve got a long way to go, you can’t spend ten minutes sitting on every couch along the way.”

“This one is comfy though, you should get it.”

I turned over the ticket and laughed, “No way, it’s almost two thousand dollars.”

Sirius’ eyes got, if possible, even wider, “That’s it?! Dude that’s hella cheap.”

“Not at Ikea Sirius, you’ve got a lot to learn.”

“It gets cheaper?”

“Jesus you’re spoiled aren’t you?”

“Yeah well, I’m amazing so…”

“You’ve got to be kidding with me.”

Sirius looked me dead in the eyes from his slouched perch on the couch, “Absolutely not, I’m completely Sirius.”

“Okay, that’s enough,” I said exasperatedly, throwing up my hands a bit dramatically and trying to hide a smile, “I’m leaving your punny ass here.” I didn’t want to laugh but something about his mix of monetary ignorance and over-the-top childish antics meant that I couldn’t help it. You are not supposed to find him funny. He is a complete wank. He wants you to laugh, wants the attention. Don’t you fall for it. I wasn’t going to be just another sad sack who gave Sirius Black attention, even if I wanted to be. I started walking away towards the next room, which had a smaller sofa with shelves built into the side and back that was a bit more my style.

Sirius jogged to catch up with me and threw an arm around my shoulders, he was a few inches taller than me with a much longer torso and so his arm fit comfortably there. He smelled good, like rain and wood and cigarette smoke. “No one ever leaves my ass Lupin.”

“This is going to be a long day if you don’t focus and help me pick out furniture.”

“Okay,” he said with mock composure, “I promise to be on my best behavior.”

His best behavior it turned out, involved pretending that each room was part of his house, picking up everything that wasn’t tied down, arguing with me about the color of the upholstery, trying to wear curtains like a toga, spinning around on the desk chairs, forcing me to lay next to him on every mattress, climbing through (and getting stuck in) the children's tunnel, and generally making a fool of himself. I tried to contain the damage, shooting apologizing looks at passerby and generally steering him away from irate employees but it was difficult to try to pretend to be stern with him when I was snorting with laughter. When I pointed out that people were staring, he just responded shrugging and laughing “of course they’re staring, we’re gorgeous”. He was an idiot for sure, but you had to admire him for his general lack of fucks.   

“I can’t afford that one, Black!” Sirius was sitting on the edge of one of the nicer beds in the showroom. This one was a mid tone warm wood with a dark blue upholstered headboard that looked like a lovely place to lean back on while reading a book. I really did like it, and so arguing with Sirius about why I wasn’t going to buy it was proving to be difficult.

“Remus it is only $499. And it’s the bed! It is the literal centerpiece of your life, sleeping, watching TV, fuck--”

“OKAY OKAY shut up oh my god those people are giving us the boss eyes.” I cut him off as a posh looking couple with a little girl hastily pulled her away from the madman and his terrible language, “Look Sirius I have to buy a whole bedroom and living room/office I can’t get the exact one I want of everything.”

“I’m just saying that other bed you wrote down looks like it would break if you were using it properly.” He had a point here, but the metal one was $350 less and that was a large amount of money for some fake wood.

I laughed and felt my cheeks getting hot, “I don’t think we have to worry about me using it for anything other than sleeping.”

“Please. You’re going to get so much fucking play in Los Angeles dude. You’re fucking cute.”

“Okay but we were talking about the bed.”

“Ahhhh,” Sirius looked satisfied with himself, one hand on his hip, “You can’t take a compliment can you?”

I was absolutely bright red at this point. I felt like his eyes were appraising me. I knew that look, I’d seen it before. “Sirius focus, the bed.”

“Well I still say you gotta splurge on the bed,” he said and he started cracking up, “Oh my GOD that sounded SO WRONG!” Then he laugh-snorted so loudly that across the aisle a woman started giggling. I laughed so hard I was crying and had to sit down next to him on the bed. It was several minutes before the two of us even calmed down enough to speak to one another and I was wiping the tears from my eyes with the back of my arm.

��Okay Lupin, I’m buying the bed.”

“What? You are not.”

“We’re roomies now right? Family. And I fuckin’ like you.”

“I mean I like you too so far--”

“So far? Fuck the hell off.” He looked actually offended so I tried once again to redirect his attention to the task at hand.

“I just mean it’s $500 Sirius. I can’t accept that, we barely know each other.”

“Just let me buy you a house warming gift. Stop making such a big fucking deal over it. It’s just money.”

“I can’t Sirius. It’s just too much money.”

“Okay well I’m buying this bed because the headboard is dope and I know you like it a ton more than the other one, AND because I’ve jumped on it and know it’s sturdy enough,” And the cheeky bastard winked at me again, “So if you buy that other shitty $150 one you’ll have two beds and I know that back house is spacious but I don’t think two queen beds would fit in it.”

What was I going to say? I could already tell by the way that he drew himself up when he said it, the way his tone shifted to all-business, (and I turned out to be right) that Sirius wasn’t the kind of person who takes no for an answer. He gave orders like someone that was used to having those orders obeyed. Someone who had heard ‘yes’ a few too many times. When he gets his mind stuck on something there’s no moving him. So I sighed and smiled at him.

“Okay. Thank you. I don’t know what to say.”

He stood, took the pencil from my hand and wrote down the number of the new bed on the pad that already had a long list of the other furniture I was buying. “Thank you will do, Lupin. Now let’s go get the last few things, you told me there’s ice cream at the end of this and I am all about that.”

He complained all the way through picking out rugs and curtains and throw pillows (I really like throw pillows okay?) but when we got to actually picking up all the boxes from the warehouse the biggest problem I had was trying not to just stand there and watch him load cart after cart with heavy boxes. Give me a break, yeah? He was showing a lot of skin and I’m on a lot of testosterone. Together we wheeled the loaded carts to the delivery counter (and went back for two more). A little more than $3,500 later, I had a bed, couch, bedside table, desk, two chairs, two rugs, coffee table, lights, shelves, TV stand, dresser, sheets and towels, comforter, curtains, throw pillows, a large cactus Sirius was calling “the scary phallus”, and even a warm blanket that reminded me of one of my favorite old jumpers. I had only spend so much money at once one other time in my life, when I bought a shitty old car my first year of uni from a kid that I had a crush on at the time. The car worked out, the crush...not so much.

I treated Sirius to an ice cream, which I figured was less than he deserved after spending five hours with me in Ikea and buying me a bed. But it was the most that he’d accept. I didn’t know what else to do. But he seemed happy enough, he did flush a bit red when I wouldn’t stop thanking him, so I guess he appreciated it even if he told me to “shut the actual fuck up”. Somehow he was still full of energy even after lifting hundreds of pounds of furniture and walking all over the certifiably biggest Ikea in the country. If I had been worried about how nice his car was on the way there, I worried less on the way back, leaning back into the incredibly soft seats and putting my head back felt like a reward after carting box after box to the delivery desk.

Sirius looked over and grinned, “Big day huh?”

I nodded, “I’m glad I only have one day until the mattress shows up, today has been a lot. The moving and the shopping and your bolloxology.”

“Um excuse me?” He laughed, “What the actual fuck did you just call me?”

“Bolloxology, you know, messing about. Your BS.”

“Holy fuck that is a ridiculous word.”

“You’re a ridiculous word.”

“Oh fantastic comeback, real smart. I can see why they let you into a PhD program.”

“You are such a muppet, and yes before you ask it means you’re an idiot.”

Sirius grinned, I had the distinct impression that he took most insults as if they were compliments -- a trait which made him infinitely charming, and infinitely frustrating at the same time. He turned up the radio and some alternative rock band was playing. As we sat quietly in traffic on the 5, the sun started to set, and it glinted deep red off the building windows, bathing the car in a warm light. It felt like we were glowing, the windows rolled down, the air just a touch stagnant between the hot cars. I felt a pang of homesickness. It was so different from the cloudy, misty-cool nights of Dublin, the old stone streets, the bustle of Grafton, the smell of the grass and trees in the park across from my favorite pub. I missed my warm jumpers with the permanent smell of tea clinging to them, the cigarette smoke hanging lazily in the air around the corner shop, proper chocolate. I missed stumbling out of The George at 3am scuttered as fuck all with my mates Sean and Frankie after a drag show and a heavy drinking session.  

As excited as I was about the new furniture, the new graduate program, the new friends and colleagues, the new roommates even, there was something sad about the perfect California horizon reflecting the last glimpses of the day. Something huge and daunting about the hot city that made me feel a bit lost, as if between the picture perfect landscape and the rubbish in the gutter there was a facade that frightened and excited me in equal measure. It was all just so big. And I was holding on to a runaway train -- Los Angeles felt like a million miles away from home. This was what it felt like, I thought a bit ruefully, to be homesick. This was also what it felt like to make something of yourself.

We arrived back at the house when it was dark, after stopping to pick up food for a whiny James who was bored without Sirius around to annoy him. When we pulled up to the house I smiled, I still could not believe that somehow I’d gotten a spot in this mansion. I was still waiting for the other shoe to drop, waiting for them to find out who I was -- emphasis on the was -- but maybe they were the good sort. Maybe…

Sirius opened the door, I didn’t have a key to the front house yet, and Padfoot came bounding out. James, hair wild, glasses halfway down his nose, was sitting on the couch in front of Comedy Central working on his laptop. He lit up when he saw Sirius which I thought was sweet until--

“FOOD!” He exclaimed gleefully. “Fucking finally! Oh god is that Golden Hen?! Yesssss.”

Sirius and I passed him several containers of Chinese food and he ate faster than I thought was humanly possible. How he could eat the amount meant for a medium sized family and be as thin as he was I have no idea. I've since learned that James is a human garbage can and his jittery, always-in-motion body consumes calories at an unbelievable rate. Some guys get all the luck.

“How did it go at Ikea?” He asked through a mouth of vegetable fried rice.

“I think it was quite an education for Sirius.”

“Did you know they have ICE CREAM there dude?! It's amazing it's huge and they have all these tiny apartments in it and they sell like pots and pans for like five dollars!”

“Yeah,” James replied nonchalantly, digging through a new container of food, “I went with the Dork when she and Marlene got their new place.”

“I saw their couch!”

“Sorry, who?” I looked confusedly from one loudly chewing roommate to the other.

“Oh!” Sirius dropped the spring roll he was holding. “James we should have them over tomorrow when Wolfram here has all his furniture delivered.” The conversation was getting further and further from something that I could track, it was like they were speaking their own language.

“Sorry,” I said, wincing at the apology, “but who are we talking about, and erm...did you just call me Wolfram?”

Sirius shrugged but there was a slyness to his eyes. “Marls and the Dork--”

But James cut in, “Marlene and Dorcas are our lesbian friends. Marlene went to high school with Sirius and I, and she picked up a girlfriend up in Berkeley. Marlene and Sirius used to date before they both caught the gay so they’re still weirdly in love with one another.”

Sirius shrugged again, “She’s a fucking bombshell, who wouldn’t be fond of her?”

“I certainly am, too bad she’s given up guys.”

I laughed at James, “Not for her, statistically women who have sex with women have way more orgasms.”

James looked affronted, “Okay, listen to PhD over here. But I’ll have you know, I’m a giver.”

“Where you stick your dick is neither here nor there --” Sirius started, but I cut him off.

“Yeah, apparently it’s nowhere at all.”

James threw a fortune cookie at me but I dodged left quickly enough that it merely hit the couch behind me. Sirius laughed so hard that he almost spilt his beer, “Well he’s got you figured out hasn’t he?”

James looked at him through narrowed eyes but said nothing so Sirius eventually lapsed into a teary-eyed silence. “Okay okay, but for real Marlene and Dorcas should come over tomorrow cause we can all build Remus’ furniture together. We were going to plan a party to welcome Remus to the family but maybe just do this on the DL. Don’t want to scare him too much.”

“You really don’t have to do that.” The last thing I needed was to be the center of attention. I wasn’t even adjusted to the two guys I had moved in with. Now I had to worry about impressing their friends? And I hadn’t had a moment to myself. I really thought I’d be building by myself, maybe some Netflix on my computer. But what was I supposed to say? They wanted to be nice. They wanted to make an effort. Come on Remus. You can’t move all the way to America and then not make a fucking effort to be social.

“I mean we don’t have to do anything dude. We’re doing this because you seem cool and we like to have a good time.” James grinned and ran a hand through his hair which left a piece of rice along his temple. I decided not to point this out but instead grinned right back at him. I caught Sirius’ eye who smiled conspiratorially at me, he’d clearly seen James make a mess of himself too. I knew immediately that he was also planning to let James sit there like a tool rather than say anything.

“So Marlene and Dorcas won’t mind helping? It is a lot of work.”

“Nah,” Sirius couldn’t tear his eyes away from the rice in James’ hair, he was not exactly the best at keeping a straight face but perhaps Sirius staring weirdly at him was routine because James seemed not to notice, “They’re lesbians they’re good at building stuff you know.”

I rolled my eyes, “I’m going to text Lily too?”

James lit up like a fucking ray of sunshine. I almost instantly regretted suggesting it. Things always get complicated when your mates want to bone one another, but on the other hand, I didn’t want to be totally outnumbered with people that I didn’t know and since I’d moved to Los Angeles, Lily was the only person I’d met from abroad. Sure she was from England, but you have to take what you can get when no one in America can make a decent cup of tea.

Sirius nodded, “I mean the more hands the easier it’ll be right? We can do beer and pizza and maybe even swim a bit.”

“I’m already texting the girls.” James was tapping madly at his phone.

That night, after stuffing my face with Chinese food with James and Sirius, I padded upstairs to sleep in one of the guest bedrooms after James absolutely refused to let me spend the night on the sofa. Despite myself I think I was already starting to like the two idiots. It was weird, I’d never had cis guy mates in Ireland that would stick around for very long. Something about my having a vagina. Sure there were lads that would return my texts periodically, or that were good for a pint or two. I don’t know what made them scare so easily -- I was still the same guy. I’d been lucky, I’d been able to pass as a (perhaps effeminate) guy for awhile even before I started testosterone. But it was always the same once they found out -- the queers, the ones that had wanted to fuck me, or to keep me around to see if they wanted to fuck me, when they found out that I lacked something they liked, that was enough reason to abandon ship. The straights, the ones that were good for a night out on the piss or that didn’t mind me when I was a winner for their team in football, they disappeared entirely. I was no longer one of the gang. Didn’t matter that the dosage I was on meant I had more testo in my system than some of them. I liked them, yeah, but I also didn’t want to get attached. Being attached, hoping for something more than a casual friendship with cis guys was like -- it was asking for heartbreak.

I waited until I heard the two of them head to bed before I stripped down to my boxer briefs. I lifted my arms and pulled my binder off slowly, peeling it away from my ribs and wincing. Too many hours in it today meant that I was probably going to feel it tomorrow. Even with the new ones I’d ordered there was always that inability to take a deep breath, the pull on the ribs that made you sore and sweaty after a long day in the thing. It was one thing in Dublin where it never got too hot, but here, where it seemingly never dipped under 70, adding an extra layer was tough. I touched my chest a bit and it was tender but I didn't think I'd have bruises. I thought about how James and Sirius had invited their friends over tomorrow and sighed. I probably wouldn't have much chance to go without the damn thing tomorrow either. Swimming? It was out of the question -- I was going to have to find a reason to pass.

I could have just told them when I came in for the interview. Lily never asked me why I didn’t even though she knew, for which I was grateful. I had been open with the department at USC, had even mentioned it in my entrance essay. I was working on trans and queer literature and film it wasn’t the most difficult puzzle to piece together. Somehow though, I just hadn’t been able to do it. I didn’t want to lose the chance at the room, and sure, I guess I liked them. Now it was as if I were keeping it from them. Every day that passed meant that I was going to get more attached to my new mansion, my new mates. It would be better to get it all out in the open now and find out if they were going to be phobic.

But now I’d ordered the furniture. It was coming tomorrow, and leaving was going to be a bit harder when I had a small apartment’s worth of furniture to move along with the boxes that were currently in the pool house. I ran my hands through my hair, trying not to let the fear that shot through me overwhelm me. Sirius was queer, he specifically asked for a queer roommate. It wasn’t going to matter. And anyway, there was no reason why they should find out.

[classic-rock-roller]

1. Kevin invites you to his class to see his presentation for Music History. You go, excited to see what he’s come up with. When he gets up to present, he uses 3 of his allotted 10 minutes, doesn’t have a slide show, and is overall uninformed. You love him to death, but his presentation is, frankly, awful. When he finishes, he looks to you earnestly. “What did you think? Was it great?” You want to be honest, but you don’t want to break his heart. What do you tell him?

I’d smile at him and go, “It was good, but not the best I know you could do. I know and have seen you do better.” 

2. You’re sitting calmly on the quad at school when someone comes up behind you and covers your eyes and wraps an arm around your torso. They lean around to whisper something in your ear and say, If you–Oh fuck you’re not who I thought you were.” They let you go and you see it’s Vince. How do you respond?

“Were you expecting someone else, Vincess?” 

3. You are being especially sassy toward Kevin lately. He is just trying to be nice, but no, just sass. After a couple of days of this, he says, “Even with all this sass, I still love you, but you are getting on my nerves.” How do you respond?

“Good, I’m glad,” and I’d kiss him and go back to being my sweet self. “Wait...were you trying to get on my nerves?” “Yes, because you said I couldn’t do anything to annoy you.” I’d turn around then and next thing I know he’s wrapping his arms around me. “You drive me crazy, you know?” I’d smile and go, “Oh, I know.”   

4. You noticed that Randy and Kevin both wear rings with letters on them. Randy’s ring has 2 R’s for his initials, so you assume that’s what Kevin’s has too, since he’s never let you see his. One day when he’s in the shower, you pick up his ring and see that the letters aren’t his initials, but yours. What do you do?

I’d smile and place the ring back down. When he’d come out of the shower, I’d go, “I really like your ring it's nice.” He’d freeze, realizing he forgot to hide it and say, “You don’t think it’s too sappy.” I’d give him a kiss. “Nah, I think it’s sweet.”  

5. You went to the bar with Kevin, Randy, Rudy, and Drew. You’re all fairly buzzed, and the house band starts up an old song. They all know it, and you don’t, unfortunately, but they all start singing. It’s got repetitive lyrics, so you catch on quickly and join in. You’re all singing together and it’s great; when it’s over, Kevin, who has been slowly progressing from buzzed to drunk, stands up and declares his love for you in front of all the bar’s patrons. Some guys whistle, and Randy and Co. whoop. How do you respond?

“I know, Kev, you do this every time I’m with you and you get drunk. You’ve had me for two years I don’t think you need to do it anymore.” He jumps down from the chair he’s standing on and goes, “Oh, I’ll do it every time.” Before pulling me in for a kiss that makes the bar whoop and whistle and Randy, Rudy, and Drew gag.  

6. You’re sitting inside one day, and Kevin is noodling with something outside trying to fix it. After about half an hour, he comes inside and very determinedly begins rooting through a kitchen drawer. “Whatcha doin’, Kev?” you ask him. Without looking up, he says, “I need a hairdryer, a fork, and a tube of tan caulk.” What is he doing and how do you respond?

“What are you doing?” I’d stop. “Don’t tell me you didn’t call the exterminator to get the hornets out of the roof.” He’d turn to me and go, “I’m not paying eleven dollars an hour for him to do something that I can do on my own.” I’d cross my arms, “Call the exterminator.” But--” “Call the exterminator. I’m am not having you fall off the ladder from getting stung by hornets.” He’d sigh defeated, “...ok.”  

7. You and Kevin just went through a very nasty and painful breakup. Out of sheer anger, you write a little poem and post it on Tumblr. It reads, “You stabbed me a hundred times and then acted like you were the one bleeding. And the worst part was that everyone was helping you while I was bleeding to death.” You think nothing of it, until 2 weeks later. A new Quiet Riot album has come out, and your poem is the main chunk of lyrics of the most popular single on the album. In an interview, Kevin is taking all the credit for writing the lyrics. You’re outraged. How do you respond?

I’d march over to his house and the minute he’d open the door I’d go, “You fucker!” This would then escalate into us having a screaming match on his front porch. Somehow we end up making out, he stops and goes, “So does this mean we’re back together?” He gives me a hopeful smile. “Yes, but you’re still a fucker.” “Oh, come on, don’t be like that.” 

8. Kevin suffered a pretty severe head injury when he fell off the roof at his parents’ house trying to fix something. You’ve been with him in the hospital for 3 days when the doctor pulls you aside. He tells you that if Kevin wakes up, he will have severe amnesia. You scoff at him, thinking that Kevin could never forget you. You’re with him for another 3 days before he wakes up. When he does, he looks at you as if you’re a stranger, and you know what the doctor said was true. He has no idea who you are. What do you do?

I’d hold back tears and go, “Hey, Kev, we’ll have you out of here in a few days I promise ok?” I’d sit with him for a little bit longer and explain who I am. I can tell he really wants to remember me and it’ll take a bit. Right before I take him home on the third day he tells me he remembers walking somewhere with me by a lake. This makes me hopeful that he’ll remember because it was one of our fondest memories together.  

9. You are frantically cramming for your finals. Your phone rings, and it’s your sister calling. You ignore her because you’re super busy. She keeps calling, and you keep ignoring her. The next morning, you take your test, and when you get back to your room, Kevin’s sitting on your bed, and he’s on the phone. You wait for him to hang up, and when he does, he looks at you sadly. “That was your sister. Your mom had a heart attack yesterday afternoon. She…didn’t make it.” How do you respond?

I’d sway and literally break down right on the floor by the door. Just...huge wracking sobs. Kevin would come over and pull me into his lap and we’d just sit there on the floor for a little bit not saying anything and just rocking ever so slightly.  

10. At the park, you and Kevin see a bunch of seagulls. You say “I wonder how many there are.” Kevin just says, “One for sorrow, two for mirth, three for a wedding and four for a birth. Five for silver, six for gold, and seven for a secret never to be told.” You look at him confusedly. He explains, “That’s how you’re supposed to count crows, my grandma told me that.” How do you respond?

“Wow cool, my grandmother used to just scream, ‘Get those fuckers off my lawn! I hate birds!’ Before chasing after them with a broom.” 

11. You’re downtown with Kevin, and you’re walking on the sidewalk. Ever the gentleman, Kevin is walking on the street side. Suddenly he pushes you into a store, clearly not paying attention to what it is. You look around him to see a car driving along the sidewalk to pass a stopped bus, missing Kevin by inches. He steps into the store. “What were you thinking!?” you ask. Kevin is suddenly pensive. “If me dying meant you living, how could that be anything but good?” You are shocked at this train of thought. How do you respond?

“Well, if you died then life wouldn’t be worth living...Don’t do anything stupid like that again!” 

--------------------

1) Randy has brought you over for the first time to meet Rudy, Kevin, and Drew. As you’re leaving so that Randy can drive you back home, you hear Kevin scream from the porch, “Remeber to use protection in the next ten minutes!” You think the whole neighborhood heard. How do you and Randy react?

2) You work in a florists shop and Kevin comes in and slams twenty bucks down on the table. “I need to get flowers for my girlfriend. How do I passive aggressively say I want to fuck you in flower?” How do you respond? 

3) You get home from work to see Randy lying face down on the carpet. “Hey, hon, what’s wrong?” He turns and looks at you, “I just had a bad day.” How do you respond? 

4) You and Randy are laying in a hammock. You’ve fallen asleep on his chest and he’s gently rocking the hammock. After a bit, he rocks it too hard and the two of you tumble out, effectively waking you up. What do you say and how does he respond?

5) You’re walking through Walmart singing one of the newer Quiet Riot songs that came on the radio. From a couple aisles down you hear someone else singing along with you. When you turn down the aisle, you run into them. It’s Randy from Quiet Riot. What do you do? 

6) You and Randy are watched one of your favorite tv shows. You get up to go to the bathroom and pause the show. “Don’t play it I’ll be right back.” You’re not even gone five minutes and when you get back, Randy is watching it again. How do you respond? 

7) You’re making breakfast for you and Stephen. When he comes out you can tell he hasn’t slept well, “Morning sunshine. Ready for breakfast.” He’s about to say something but bursts into tears. Why is he crying and what do you do? 

8) You’re in the shower when all of a sudden the curtain is pulled back, You scream, but it’s only Randy, he goes, “Are we--stop screaming, it’s just me--are we out of Cheetos?” How do you respond? 

9) Randy and you are sitting on the couch and he’s telling you about the gig last night that you were unable to go to. You’re listening but also thinking in your head, “This is the person I’m in love with.” Randy literally stops and says, “You realize that’s the first time you’ve said that right?” How do you respond? 

10) You and Randy are in bed and you have your back to him. After a bit, you feel this light touch on your back. It’s Randy spelling out ‘I love you.’ He thinks you’re asleep. How do you respond? 

11) You were eating dinner with Randy and accidentally bit your lip. “Shit I bit my lip.” Randy puts down his fork and gives you a smile, “Do you want me to kiss it to make it feel better?” How do you respond?  

@osbournebemydaddy , your move, love