#his hair style just like. reminded of me the scene kid bangs. do you get me.

[camelspit]

actually i think the jensi art is really funny he looks like hes in his emo phase and i support that

[missskzbiased]

The Things We Don’t Tell

Summary: You were sure your life was written and directed to fit a sketchy Rom-Com and nobody could convince you otherwise. First, your boss was too hot to be true, and burning with desire didn’t even begin to explain the tingling sensations he left on you. Second, your coworker (a.k.a. Ex-About-to-be-FWB) insisted in turning your life into a living hell, which wasn’t the exact kind of hotness you were into. And if having these two hot men around you every single day of your life wasn’t enough to prove it, maybe the threat of your slutty secret identity about to be busted would be… But you couldn’t let this happen.

WC: 7,5 K

Genre: Smut, Humor (?)

AUs: Office, Enemies to Lovers

Pairing: Hwang Hyunjin X Fem!Reader X Bang Chan  

(Not really a love triangle as Hyunjin is the Lead. However, Reader wants to Bang Chan)

Rebloggable Masterlist    //   Main Masterlist   //   Tag List

Warnings: Language, Thigh riding, Public space (Office), Exhibitionism, Possessiveness, Pet Name (Baby girl), Sir Kink  

[If I forgot anything, please let me know! I’m kinda sleepy right now]

Notes: There will be at least one more chapter but I won’t do a tag list post for now, only if someone wants it, cuz I’m too lazy to think about doing it right now. This fic is an attempt to experiment with some writing style things that I’ve been wanting to try. I don’t think it worked, tho SUHAHUSAUHSUHA But that’s life

- I’ll quite possibly change the title in the future-

                                                            ///

  You are a superhero.

    Okay! To be honest, you may be exaggerating a little bit ─ a tiny harmless little bit ─ but that was how you felt every single day of your life, alright? You had this glorious and mysterious side of yours that you hid from everyone else in the world… That mask that you couldn’t let come to the ground and would fight for dear life to protect… That side to your persona that no one was allowed to meet… The fierce, bold, and dark aspects of your soul that—

    “Y/N! I want those papers on my table!”

    “Yes, sir!” You shrieked in an embarrassing (not even slightly bold) way.

    — That you couldn’t show at your work.

    Yeah… So maybe no one actually thought of you as a superhero, but you really believed someone should start to. Was there something that different between your life and those low-budget TV shows people seem to enjoy so much? You didn’t think so.

  To be fair, sometimes you felt like someone wrote a questionable script and poorly directed your life to fit you as the leading lady of a sketchy rom-com. As if they just focused on checking out every point on a bullet list made up with rules for a successful superhero office drama that wasn’t even that good…

    … And speaking of which…

    Rule Number One: The stern (maybe kinda attractive) boss!

    If you had to define Bang Chan with a couple of adjectives, you would choose undeniably beautiful ─ extremely professional of you because the right words to describe him were fucking hot ─ and committed. Fortunately, it wasn’t an “I have someone waiting for me at home and a bunch of kids I must put to sleep” kind of commitment, which would destroy your hopes of having this man one day. Unfortunately, it was an “I’m better than the header and gonna run this company by tomorrow night” kind of commitment, which destroys your hopes of a peaceful day at work.

    Now, it’s not like you don’t want to do your job! It’s just that you didn’t sign up to be Bang Chan’s perfect little toy ─ definitely not the better words to describe it ─ and you didn’t expect to be joined by the hips ─ really? ─ with him or any of your coworkers. The thing is that Bang Chan wants to be on top ─ someone has to stop you ─ and he believes the only way to get there is to work as a team and be as perfect as one can be. In other words, Bang Chan wants absolutely everything and everyone to be neat, tight, and ready to be used ─ again… Not the better way to put your thoughts into words ─, but this just wasn’t who you were.  

    It also wasn’t the point right now.

    The point right now should be the fact that Bang Chan was striding to his office looking like he owned the whole damn place… If this was a movie, the camera would be focusing on his expensive, black leather shoes before scanning all the way up to his waist in slow motion. The scene would zoom in on his fine ass only to go a little bit up and catch the shiny, black belt wrapping around his figure. The outfit didn’t leave much to the imagination, but you had a hell of a productive mind… You could think of a few things you shouldn’t really be thinking about right now.

    Bang Chan didn’t seem to understand he was at work either.

    He rolled his sleeve up in a sexy motion that should be illegal. It isn’t. You can tell by the way there are no cops bursting inside the building and arresting this gorgeous son of a bitch.

    The lack of any authorities to stop this atrocious moment had you lowering your gaze to your desk ─ a vain attempt to ignore the way his forearms flexed as he gestured and ordered people around. If you were a little bit less professional, you would have some ideas of how he could do it in bed. With you. But you weren’t some kind of creepy perv who would be fantasizing about riding your own boss from dusk till dawn.

    Not at all.

    “Do you need me, Sir?” His secretary asks politely.

  A question that you would love to ask him too… In a totally and strictly professional way, of course.

    Rule Number Two: The (extremely unnecessary) nemesis!

    The shiver running down your spine could mean only one thing: Hwang Hyunjin ─ your obnoxious coworker ─ was standing right behind you, just like a bloody damn ghost. There was no need to turn around. You knew he had his mocking eyes glued on Bang Chan’s figure, and you could feel the air shifting as he tilted his head in a silent sneer before leaning on your desk.

    You refused to turn around and acknowledge his presence; painfully aware that he would flash a wide grin while looking at you with a knowing glint in his eyes. You wouldn’t give him the taste of seeing in your face that he was right; that you were staring at your boss as if you were a starving vulture. So you did the only thing you could do in this situation: You started to work. The sheets scattered over your desk wouldn’t walk by themselves to Bang Chan’s room, right?

    And neither would you if it depended on Hyunjin.

    The attempts to swipe the papers in your direction and gather everything you needed ─ to finally get rid of Hyunjin ─ proved to be vain as his hand took root on the desk. You pursed your lips in annoyance while glancing at his prominent knuckles and slender fingers; wondering if he would be so collected if he knew you wanted to crunch them. Probably not. But he gets off so fucking much on upsetting you that he might just want to take the risk anyway.

    “What do you want, asshole?” You hissed; stopping your motions before turning around to stare blankly at him.

    The face of an angel was the most accurate way to describe the sight in front of you. Plump, pink lips molded into a sweet smile and dark brown eyes morphed into cute crescents. None of those features fit his true self, though. Underneath the angelic façade, there was a demon called Hwang Hyunjin ─ who was resting his free hand on your shoulder for no reason besides driving you crazy.

    It would be easier if he was just a pretty face, but Hyunjin had a good body too. The guy looked just like a model ─ slim, tall, and classy ─, and even though only his collarbones peeked out from down his shirt, you knew that there was much more than the eyes could see.

    Well, you never saw it, but you had felt it.

    As far as you could remember, each curve on Hyunjin’s abs was craft by God himself. The way his chest was built for you to caress would be forever craved on your mind. You might never forget how soft his lips were in contrast to his lap… How his thighs flexed just right when you pulled his hair… How reactive he was… How his moans sounded… And how he put everything to waste.

    “Oh, nothing” He shrugged. As usual, his voice was just like sweet, hot honey; still, you could wipe the poison dripping down his chin, “I was just wondering if you had enough time to do your job while fucking your boss inside your head” He clarified sarcastically, cracking you a smile.

    Sometimes you regretted not putting his mouth to good use… He really needed to learn how to shut up for a while and stop being so… Unbearable. The silence he met had him scoffing; body leaning even closer to the point his face was practically hovering over yours ─ smugness plastered all over it. You held his gaze to confront him; breathe mingling with his in a heated mix that matched the anger under your eyes.

    Was he licking his lips as he stared at yours? Oh boy… He definitely wanted to get laid. It was your time to scoff as the frown on your lips turned into a smirk; eyes twinkling mischievously as you looked into his in a silent teasing. As if sensing that he was in trouble, Hyunjin tilted his head to look even more obnoxious than he was; face coming closer to yours to defy your newfound confidence.

     “You know what? If you stared at him any longer, I think his balls might have fallen off…” He whispered in a tone loud enough for just you to hear “Unless he saw the way you were looking at him… Then I guess his dick would go straight up” He assured you with a ‘friendly’ pat on your shoulder as he finally let go of your papers and straightened his back.

    “Are you saying it from experience?” You sneered; grimacing at him.

    “Are you telling me that you want me to fuck you too?” He retorted gibingly; not even thinking twice about it.

    “No” You tilted your head, trying to stay composed, “I’m reminding you that you couldn’t even kiss me without getting a boner… Just like a teenage boy” He arched a brow at your statement; pursing his lips as he hummed in wonder “I’m surprised you never came in your pants like the pathetic thing you are” He laughed; poking his cheek with his tongue before squeezing your shoulder in a silent warning.

    “I must have been quite a sight if you can remember it so vividly” You pretended not to notice the way he sniggered, pushing away the urge to punch his face.

  Nemesis was just a classy way to call him a pain in the ass.

  Rule Number Three: The (plain and uninteresting) secret identity!

  It would be impossible to miss the moment Hyunjin’s devilish smirk morphed into a bright, friendly smile. The snarky comment on the tip of your tongue was swallowed back in a bit; grimace dissolving into a wide grin as if you weren’t about to throw your fists at him. He giggled as his arms spread open before snaking around your body to pull you into a tight hug; holding you close and rocking your body side to side as a soft huff fell from your lips.

    If you didn’t know any better, your knee would be buried between his legs.

  “Way to go, Y/N!” He chirped, loosening his grip to take a better look at your face; eyes smiling as if the both of you were the bestest of friends in the entire world, “You’re awesome! I’m so proud… I can’t believe how lucky I am to have you as my teammate” He pursed his lips; dimples showing as he offered you nothing but affection in his gaze.

    You did know better, though, and it wasn’t too hard to figure out who was standing behind your back as you opened your mouth to answer him: “There’s no one I’d rather be with!” You reassured Hyunjin in a sweet, mirthful tone; tilting your head to return the fondness in his look in an act worthy of an Oscar “We’re a team, you know? You can’t get rid of me so easily” He laughed wholeheartedly at that; ruffling your hair before leaning closer to you again, resuming the hug.

    “We’ll see about that” He whispered in your ear, making you scoff.

    “What are you gonna do? Cry to Daddy so you won’t work with me anymore?” You hissed back; breaking away from his hug with a tight grin before turning around to meet Chan’s gaze.

    The surprise plastered over your face was millimetrically calculated; just like the way you pretended to be flustered as you stared into your boss’ eyes to see the pride shining on them. You brought the papers closer to your chest in what was meant to be an innocent, coy way ─ a technique mastered over the months you worked for him ─, and Chan seemed to fall for it as he giggled in delight. The poor guy had no clue all of this was as fake as your camaraderie towards Hyunjin, and he wasn’t about to discover it anytime soon if it depended on you.

    Luckily, it did! You had taken some acting classes; just enough for your next words to be naturally convincing: “I’m so sorry, Sir! We’re just so happy that –” The words were deliberately drawled to give him enough time to interrupt you. Just like you knew he would. And it was a good thing that he did because you had no idea of how you were supposed to finish that sentence anyway.

    You were a good actress, not a professional improviser.

    “Don’t mention it” He cut you off giggly; detaching himself from the doorframe he leaned on as he watched the friendly scene taking place.

    The amount of cuteness this man could deliver in his smile wasn’t fair, and it didn’t match the sensuality a simple gesture of his overflowed with, enchanting you. You gulped down as he gave both of you a silent order to follow him into his room, wondering if the duality he had in the office was remotely similar to what he could do in bed ─ a thought that shouldn’t be having a place in your mind right now.

    Hyunjin seemed to pick up on it pretty quickly too, and as soon as Chan turned around to head to his office, he bumped his shoulder onto yours. The obnoxious action was followed by your elbow diving into his ribs; a retaliation that took you less than a second and, luckily, Chan ─ or any of your coworkers ─ didn’t seem to notice. Neither of you gave away your silent quarrel as Hyunjin closed the door behind him, smiling at you when Chan finally took his seat.

     “It’s good to see that you guys have such chemistry” He confessed, and you had to suppress a scoff when you looked into his eyes. He had no idea… The chemistry between you two was enough to make you want to blow each other, “You know what I always say, right?” He boasted on a sing-song; much more at ease than he seemed to be earlier.

    You weren’t about to put that on the line, though.

    “You can’t have teamwork if you don’t have a team!” You warbled in unison.

    “That’s the spirit!” Chan gurgled, heading to his desk in a visibly good mood.

    What was going on? He wouldn’t be so happy just because you and Hyunjin were being friendly… Were you missing something? He didn’t seem in such a peaceful state of mind when he came in… It had to be something that happened after that. Perhaps he got some good news from his secretary? Or maybe… You narrowed your eyes as you caught a glimpse of Hyunjin’s hands fidgeting in front of him; his foot tapping the ground rapidly but quietly before moving slightly to step on your toe.

     Or maybe Hyunjin had something to do with it…

    “As I said in the email, Sir, I happened to hear some stuff around and… KQ managed to get an exclusive with Han Jisung” The sentence sounded just like a normal introduction to a report, but you knew it wasn’t. Hyunjin’s eyes darted to meet yours, glinting with anxiety and despair. He was informing you of what was going on, not Chan, “And as we all know, Jisung is a rising producer star, which is bound to raise their sales and might get in the way of ours…” He continued, swallowing dryly and widening his eyes ever so slightly.

    He was definitely trying to warn you of something.

    “Yes, I read the e-mail, Hyunjin” Chan agreed sternly; smile disappearing as his fingers intertwined to serve as a support for his chin. He looked classy and incredibly sexy, but your mind couldn’t afford to focus on it right now. You had to figure out what the hell Hyunjin suggested to Chan before blowing everything up, “You also said that Y/N might have the solution for this…” Oh, so that was it, you thought when Chan arched his brow; eyes connecting to yours.

    And now what?

    “So?” He encouraged you, detaching his chin from his hands so he could rest them on his desk “I’m waiting” He smiled gently; a closed-mouth smile that was supposed to calm your nerves, even though you could see how tumultuous his gaze was right now.

    It was practically a silent threat.

    In a normal situation, the predatory way he was looking at you ─ resembling a wolf when you were nothing but a sheep under his radar ─ would get you… Thinking.

    Your job wouldn’t be at stake in a normal situation, though.

    The pressure on your toes increased; the subtle way Hyunjin found to snap you out of your mind, despite your silence hanging in there for just a few seconds. It was obvious that he was freaking out just as much as you were, and you couldn’t help but blame him for this. Couldn’t he have told you about it earlier? What the hell was going on inside his mind?! Instead of taunting you about wanting to fuck Bang Chan, he should have warned you about that shit!

    That’s not the time for this, Y/N.

    The muscles on your face tensed as you tried to not give away everything going through your mind; lips twisting in a tight smile as you looked at Hyunjin: “Yeah, he was right” You answered calmly, even though your stomach was settled on becoming an Olympic athlete right now, “As I was telling him before coming here, Sir, I have someone in mind…” The relief washed over Hyunjin’s face; a genuine smile adorning his features as he withheld a sigh, “I happen to know I.N, and I think I can get us an exclusive” You confessed, shifting your gaze from Hyunjin to Chan.

    “The writer?” He blurted out, astonishment plastered all over his face.

    “Yeah… They’re a friend of mine…” You trailed off, embarrassed to say it out loud “They’re in the top trending now since their novel will become a drama and…” You cleared your throat, lowering your head to avoid his gaze. There was just so much of acting you could handle for a day, “I mean- It’s… Adult stuff, right? But they never—”

    “I know! That’s perfect!” He beamed, getting up from his chair to walk your way “They’ve never been seen! Nobody knows anything about them, Y/N” He laughed ─ he genuinely laughed ─ while clasping his hands together “Han Jisung is good, but I.N is better! This is hot news… FrontPage… How come you never told me about that?” He chuckled, placing his hand on your shoulder “Rest assured that when I get my promotion, I’m gonna have you right here in this room” He promised you in such a serious tone that a shiver ran down your spine.

    Rule Number Four: The (kinda horny) true self!

    There was not a single soul in the office as you made your way down the hall; eyes focused on the mesmerizing view outside. The sky was colored in purple shades, so deep that you would have mistaken them for black if it weren’t for the dazzling, sleepless city and its dozens of skyscrapers lighting everything up. Not even the full moon would be able to compete with such a beautiful brilliance, but it wouldn’t be necessary either as your gaze was abruptly torn away from the night.

    The darkness surrounding you didn’t allow your brain to connect the dots immediately, and you couldn’t help but wonder what happened when you bumped into something. The surface was much softer than a wall, yet firm enough to have you wincing for the impact; eyes snapping to meet the unlucky bastard that stayed until so late. The moonlight kissed his skin just enough for you to recognize the sharp features of your boss; clenched jaw revealing popping veins that distracted you for a fraction of a second.

     Your eyes trailed the path from his jaw to his neck, and you couldn’t help but wonder how it tasted like; if you could savor it like the sins you wanted to commit with him. The closeness didn’t work in your favor, and the hint of his scent intoxicated your senses as you connected your gazes. Something must have given you off ─ maybe your hesitation, maybe the lust glinting in your eyes ─ because the next second, Cristopher had his hand placed on your lower back.

   The warm sensation grew to a burning feeling as his eyes darkened while diving into yours; his stern, cold gaze contrasting to the feeling of his touch and sending a shiver down your spine. Could he have noticed the way your legs trembled as his grip tightened around you? The look on his face was indecipherable, and the intensity of his gaze made you feel too exposed and vulnerable to keep looking for an answer, so you averted your eyes away from him.

    “Weren’t you supposed to come as soon as you got his answer?” The way his voice made its way to your senses had the embarrassment washing over you. The huskiness in his tone made you gulp down ─ throat dry from thirsting over him ─ and the calmness in his sentence alarmed you as it didn’t match the disapproval in his eyes “It’s so late that there is no one else here anymore” He added nonchalantly; mixed signals getting you confused to what he meant by it.

    Was it just a way to scold you or was it an invitation?

    “I’m sorry, Sir” Despite not having anyone around, you whispered the words as if you could be caught at any moment now, “It took me longer than expected, but we—”

    “We?” His eyes were sharp enough to cut you off but the real reason why you couldn’t manage to finish your thoughts was the way he pulled your body impossibly closer to his “Were you with him this whole time?” He hissed right into your ear, letting his hot breath fan over your cold, sensitive skin in a silent threat.

    “Working” You corrected, even though he didn’t say anything.

    “Working” He hummed in agreement; hand going to tuck your hair behind your ear “As in how we work late at night?” He sneered, manhandling you to press your back against the cold surface of the glass wall that separated his office from the rest of the place “Or is it as in how he wants to work you on his desk?” He scoffed; soft huff almost as degrading as the way he held your cheeks with one hand and guided your eyes to his.

    “Neither” You guaranteed breathlessly; voice quivering in excitement.

    “Are you going to pretend that you didn’t notice his looks?” He narrowed his eyes at you; his knee making its way to the gap between yours before slowly rising to your thighs, “That you don’t know how much he wants to fuck you?” He laughed humorlessly, shaking his head in disbelief, “You better not, ‘cause I know you love it” He warned as he kicked your legs apart.

    “He could never fuck me as you do” There was such seriousness in your tone that it had him chuckling, and he nodded in approval before burying his nose in your neck, “I-I’m yours only, Sir… I know my place” You promised quietly, trying not to give away how aroused his jealousy made you feel.

    “Yeah…” His raspy laughter tickled your skin, and you muffled a whine as he grazed his teeth over your neck teasingly “But you like being reminded of it, don’t you?” He taunted, taking in your scent in a way that made you feel too small and helpless. He groaned as soon as you let a whimper fall from your lips, and you couldn’t help but struggle to stay still while knowing what was about to come, “Do I have to spell it for you, baby girl?” He snickered before sucking on the tender spot of your skin that he knew too well at this point.

    “N-No” Somewhere inside your head, you acknowledged that your reaction was insanely humiliating. He just needed a couple of words spoken in a sultry tone and you couldn’t even form a proper sentence. That was the power he had on you. And you loved it. “Only yours” The rushed tone made him smirk against your neck, stopping his path of kisses for a second to look into your eyes “Sir” You panted; returning his gaze with just as much intensity as he had on his.

    “Claim your place” His order was so tantalizing that you didn’t even blink before you finally let your knees give away, losing the support of your legs to earn the support of his thigh, “That’s right… You do remember your place” Somehow, this sounded like the best praise he could ever offer you, even under his amused tone, “But you have been such a bad girl lately…” He pouted as he caressed your cheek; hand stopping to grab your chin gently “And I don’t like bad girls… You know that, right?” He let his thumb reach for your lower lip, fiercely staring at it before grazing his finger on your teeth.

    Your answer was as silent as his request; tongue welcoming his thumb before you sucked on his digit. He hummed in appreciation, pushing it inside your mouth as you looked at him with big doe eyes to show a coyness that wasn’t really there within you. The action was followed by a swirl around the tip of his finger; as if to leave in his mouth the taste of what he was missing and prompt him to give you what you really wanted: Him.

    If he picked up on your plans, he showed it by giving like for like.

   He didn’t say a word as he pressed his thigh against your heat; leaning closer to let his breath fan over your neck once more. He stood like that for what could have been seconds, maybe minutes, but nonetheless time enough for his warmth to creep into your senses. He was like a poison to you; the intoxicating presence clouding your better judgment and destroying any will you had to have him losing control. You didn’t even mind the way he scoffed as you started to grind his leg; brows twisting to shout out a needy plea for release.

    “That’s a good girl” He approved, catching your earlobe between his teeth. The moan that fell from your lips was muffled by his finger and he didn’t seem to appreciate it, “I don’t hear you, baby girl” He complained, moving on to your jaw with a path of open-mouthed kisses that weren’t enough to distract you from his other hand “There’s no one here… Be loud for me” He allured you as his hand found its way under your shirt.

      The temptation was great… Scream his name as he fucked you senseless in the office... No risk of being caught… Just you, and him, and your dirty little secret…

    Your thoughts were all around the place, and you had no hopes of grasping them back as his cold hand brushed your side, contrasting to the warmth under your clothes. The way he touched you made shivers run down your spine; his slow, delicate motion enhancing your senses to every single second of his caresses. You held your breath when his finger finally managed to reach its destination; grazing over your nipple to have you succumbing to his wishes.

    You fought it as you could, but you were never much of a fighter.

    It was too easy for him to have you under his control, and he knew it. You could tell it by the way he chuckled as soon as you gave away how lost you were at this point. The moan that left your lips came all the way up from your chest, sounding crystal clear in the room as you let your mouth fall agape. Sucking on his finger and following his orders were the last concern you would have for this moment. The only thing worthy of your attention right now was the fact that you couldn’t get as much friction as you needed, and you had to do something about it.

    So you grind on his leg for dear life.

    “You’re so needy” The mockery didn’t have much effect on your mind anymore, so you just kept sliding up and down his thigh as if that was the only thing that could keep you going “You’re not even listening to me, are you?” He huffed in disbelief; thumb leaving your mouth so he could cup your face “That’s all you can understand, right?” He taunted, pinching your nipple to get your attention again, “Are you still there, baby girl?” He leaned closer to whisper in your ear.

      “F-Fuck me” Was the only answer he would get.

      “Manners” He warned; licking the sweet spot next to your jaw.

      “Fuck me, Sir” You corrected yourself; wrapping your arms around his shoulders to look for some support as you practically bounced on his leg, “Please, fuck me, Sir” You repeated, forehead resting on the crook of his neck as you clawed his back, trying to bring him as close as possible to you.

      “Louder” He demanded, and you didn’t need to look at his face to know that he was grinning, “Louder…” He instructed in a tone so low that you could barely hear him over the rustling sounds of fabric against fabric. Your breath hitched as his hand gently caressed your hair; moving some strands away from your face to take a better look at you. However, he didn’t get to see your teary eyes, “Come on, baby… Look at me” He asked in a tantalizing tone, alluring you to try and meet his gaze.

    There wasn’t much you could see through your hooded eyes; vision too blurry for you to grasp what was going on inside his mind. You could tell he enjoyed it, though. He always did. That moment when he could pinpoint you had given up on your control, that you weren’t yourself anymore and would be willing to do whatever he asked… He lived for it, for that rebellious flame of self-control extinguishing from your eyes.

     For who you become when lust overcomes you.        

    The grip on his hair wasn’t unexpected, and Cristopher offered you a small, wicked smile before you connected your lips. The kiss was messy and hurried; tongues exploring every corner they could find while your hands were occupied on getting rid of your clothes. Neither of you cared about anything else but feeling each other’s bodies as you ripped your shirts. The cold breeze hitting your bare skin wasn’t enough to cool down the heat consuming you, but it was enough to have you squirming and whining.

      “Beautiful” Was the only thing he said before pushing your back against the glass and adjusting his grip to take your nipple between his teeth. The groan that escaped your lips was almost animalistic, prompting him to answer with a grunt of his own as he sucked on your skin. The vibrations ran from your flesh to your core, enticing another moan that seemed to fall into deaf ears, “Louder, baby… I want him to hear you…” He pleaded, letting go of your breast just to grope it and give you a kitten lick on the next second “To know who made you like this…” He added before sucking on it again.

    Perhaps it was the fact that he thrust on you, just to tease your senses and make you thirstier. Perhaps it was the fact you had to support yourself on just one leg as he pushed his hips against yours and you tried to seek for your balance by involving his leg with yours. Perhaps it was his hand sliding to meet your clothed core; finger pressing against your clit to add a delicious, needed stimulus for your orgasm.

    Perhaps it was the words that slipped through his lips.

    “W-What did you say?” You panted; hips faltering as you tried to keep riding him, but steading their pace as his finger circled your clit to goad you “M-Mhm… S-Sir” You cried; hand burying in his hair to pull it and translate the utter bliss waving down your body. The string of mewls and urgent pleas spilled from you like a chant, getting him more eager than before, “P-Please” You whined, even though you weren’t sure what you were asking for.

      “Hold it” He ordered; straightening his back to look right into your eyes, but failing as yours rolled back to your head. His hand made its way to squeeze your cheeks, forcing you to look at him with a soft shake to catch your attention “Look at me” It sounded like a warning; stern enough for you to try your best to focus on him, “You’ll only cum when he walks right through that door… Do you understand?” He searched for any signs of stubbornness in your eyes, but his smile showed he didn’t found any.

    “W-Who?” You managed to ask; body trembling as you tried to hold every single string inside your mind in place, even though each one of them was ready to snap and unravel the crashing pleasure that was building up.

    “Why does it matter?” He scoffed, quickening his pace as the unmistakable ring of the elevator sounded on the room “You love being seen, don’t you?” He chuckled, watching as your body shook violently and your knees started to give away to the sensations running down your body.

      “Y-Yes, Sir” You could bet your voice echoed inside the building, and Christopher seemed to agree with you as he grinned in approval.

    “So look at your guest, baby… And scream my name” He instructed, pushing your face to the side. The doors opened slowly, revealing the lights inside the small cubicle right in front of your eyes “Let him know who you belong to” He whispered in your ear; hand pushing your underwear aside so his finger could come in contact with your core.

    The mysterious figure detached from the corners of the metallic walls to finally reveal himself. You met his eyes for a half of a second; enough time for you to recognize the one who worked with you every single day of your life. For the past few years. Someone who would be your partner for years to come, and who would witness and engrave your face in your most vulnerable moment.

    You came hard; probably the most overwhelming orgasm you had ever had in your life. It was impossible to hold back your voice, and you couldn’t help but howl his name; legs shaking and body collapsing into your boss’ arms. You squirmed and whimpered as you tried to recompose yourself; letting him help you ride you out of your orgasm and occupying yourself by staring into your coworker’s shocked eyes.

    “Thank you, Sir…” You breathed out, gripping his arms for dear life while the shame sank into your soul.

    Rule Number Five: The (grateful and satisfied) fans!

    And… Post.

    Oh, well… You did it. Again. There was something about displaying your deepest fantasies for anyone to see that was kinda thrilling to you. Your heart raced inside your chest just like a drum ─ well, if a goddamn drummer decided to do a solo but was too offbeat, to begin with ─ and you couldn’t help but stare blankly at the page without a clue of what to do now. It was out there… Why didn’t anyone say anything yet? Was it that bad? Should you delete it?

    Well… People have to read it before commenting, you know?

    Yeah, right… You just posted it.

    Chill.

    You licked your lips before biting them; feeling the rush that was posting about your boss online when no one else knew about it. If you were being honest, the best part of this wasn’t having the chance to live your fantasies throughout your writing. No. The best part was knowing that only you knew the true identity of Christopher… Or what you really wanted to do to him while he walked down the hallway. The best part was that no one would ever figure out that you were the author of the bestselling novel of the moment… That this steamy romance between boss and employee was nothing but your rawest desire.

     Who would think that the boring, shy girl from the office would be a smut writer? Who would think that you would have a horny, interesting secret identity? No one else but you.

      And this was priceless.

     Or maybe… It was priceless.

    As far as you knew, every single thing you cherished about being a secretive horny bitch could go down the drain tomorrow. It would be all fine if it was just a… Well, actually everything would suck. How would you look at Chan’s face if he knew you were writing about having sex with your boss while he was your boss? What would you do if they decided to fire you because of it? What would you do with your life from now on?!

     Don’t panic, Y/N.

    You had everything under control… Tomorrow morning you would be going to Jeongin’s house and interview him as if he were you. No one would ever suspect you after that. You would save your ass, Hyunjin’s ass, and Chan’s ass. And that was it. The perfect plan. Nothing to worry about. Just trust Jeongin to follow your script and make sure everything would go as planned.

    Flawless. Totally safe. Perfect.

    That’s right…

    You just need to take a deep breath and rela—

    The sudden sound caught you off guard; eyes focusing on the screen once again so you could understand what was going on. All of your worries vanished away as soon as you saw the notification on the top of it; announcing that you had just got a message from a fan.

     Finally!    

    The weasel icon was so familiar that you chuckled while opening the message; a smile plastering over your face as you let your eyes wander around the words. There was nothing more fulfilling to your writer ass than seeing the way Weasel always had something to say about your story. Sometimes, he’d give you some feedback on your style. Other times, he’d freak out about how much he wanted to “try those things out”, as he usually said. There were also times when he’d just get excited over the characters and their conflicts, which always got you laughing.

    It was fun to talk to Weasel.

    He was just as mysterious as you… There was no name to his face, and also no face to his icon, but both of you were friends anyway. He had been keeping up with your stuff from such an early stage that it felt natural to have him around and getting his feedback. It was so comfortable, that you didn’t even mind when he slid in your DMs, embarrassed to let anyone else know that your smut made him… Feel things. There was no need to elaborate on what he did about those feelings or those things. But it was kinda hot to know he enjoyed himself throughout your fantasies.

      His fantasies.

    Well… For the number of times that you used them to write your stories, it was some sort of shared fantasies by now. As a matter of fact, you never intended to make Christopher a jealous character but Weasel made the idea seem too hot for you to ignore. Sometimes, he’d open up about that girl from his work that he really liked and how jealous he was of the guy she liked and then… Well, it felt… Interesting.

    The thought of being desirable to the point a guy would want to claim you as his like this? Not that Weasel did it. He actually just mentioned that he hoped she was into this as a kink. You couldn’t help but picture the way he would touch her in such a greedy way… The possessiveness blinding him for a second… The grip tightening… The mean words and the humiliation… Oh, the sweet humiliation that would crush you as he whispered how much you would cum for him… How he was the only one who could make you like that… How he would ask you to say his name… To tell him that you were his…

    You could drink holy water and still be shaking just by picturing it.

    “That was such a good chapter… I didn’t expect you to use her friend like that. I thought it was a given that she’d end up with Chris” You read out loud, chuckling when he reached for your DMs to talk to you “Will we get a threesome or something, miss? 😏” He joked on the next line and you couldn’t help but roll your eyes at this “I’m waiting for it”

    “You’re just a horny bitch, aren’t you?” You typed, smirking as you stared at his messages “No spoilers for you, though, baby boy… You’ll have to wait like everybody else” Teasing him was always funny, and he never failed to amuse you.

      “I’m not the one writing porn online” He pointed out, and before he could write anything else you shot him.

    “Yeah but you’re the one getting off to it” You retorted, getting a whole set of gasping and shocked emotes that had you laughing.

    “I have no words to express how offended I am” You chortled, shaking your head in disbelief.

     “Alright, Drama Llama” Why was it so fun to mock him? You wished you could actually meet him offline and banter like this in real life “To fill your horny ass, I might write a dom!reader next time… I was thinking about torturing the 2nd lead a bit”

    “First of all… I don’t think I want my ass filled, thank you for offering tho” Why was he like this? “And I was just joking” You frowned at that, confused by what he meant “Don’t you think that a threesome doesn’t go along with the characters? Her friend likes her a lot and Christopher is just a kinky son of a bitch… I thought he’d just show him that she was his and be an ass as usual”

    “What do you have against Chris, dude?” You rolled your eyes, although he wouldn’t be able to see it, “He’s way better than her friend! At least, he does something about her”

    “I have the 2nd male lead syndrome! You know that!” You chortled, very aware of this, “And isn’t that the perfect opportunity for him to do something about it?! I mean… I don’t want to be nosey but having a threesome is way out of character for them” He pointed out, and you had to admit he was right.

    “No, you’re not nosey…” You sighed; shoulders dropping for a second “It’s just that I’m upset about something that happened at work today and you know that projecting my problems on those characters is my thing” You pursed your lips, staring at the keyboard for a few seconds before deciding to continue “Besides, I’m about to spend an entire day with a guy that kinda inspired the 2nd lead and… I don’t really want to think about a sex scene with him, you know?” You confessed.

    “But thinking about torturing and having a threesome with him is easy” He mocked you.

      “That’s because that threesome would never happen” You sent it before you could think about what you had just written.

    “Ooohhhh!” Holy shit… The amount of emotes he had just dumped on that chat couldn’t be a good sign, “So having sex with this guy is something you want?! And that could happen?! ” Great, now you would have a Drama Llama-Weasel trying to get some juicy gossip about your inexistent sex life… WORSE! Your sex life with your nemesis! “Why don’t you go for it? I’m sure he’s into you if he’s anything like his character” Poor thing… He had no idea.

    “Shut up, it’s not like that” You brushed it off.

    “If you say so” You could almost hear him snickering, even though you didn’t know how his voice sounded like “I’ll just have you regretting this for the rest of the night” You snorted, shaking your head in disbelief. He was unbearable! “I have work early tomorrow but I’m gonna come back with questions, Miss… Wait for me”

    “What I meant is that it’d be easier to happen than having a threesome, not that I want it to happen, moron” You defended yourself but he didn’t even get to read it as he logged off right away.

      Great… He would never let you live it down.

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Rebloggable Masterlist    //   Main Masterlist   //   Tag List

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[skamamoroma]

I Promised You The Moon - Episode 1 Thoughts - aka did John Hughes direct this and not tell us?

Oh I had to wait so long today to see episode 1 as I was working but I am so very happy I waited till I was in bed and with a cup of tea... which I then cried into four times. So that’s where I’m at. This is going to be long, I’m not even sorry in the slightest!

For ITSAY, I made so many posts about this show and how moving and beautiful it was, how the symbolism and writing was exceptional, how the music was absolutely incredible and how much I adored BK and PP’s chemistry. P’Boss’ work is special and the feel of Part 1 was a delicious kind of awkward, indie movie full of metaphors, fraught pain and emotion and pretty breathtaking storytelling of love and growth. I fell absolutely in love with Teh and Oh and their story, obsessed with Teh as a character (as I see a lot of myself in him and I love when he spirals) and I just felt utterly moved by the whole show. So I never needed Part 2. Part 1, for me, is perfect. And I certainly didn’t expect to love Part 2 as much or feel as much emotion because I just thought it wouldn’t be possible especially with a change of director and city and storyline... but I genuinely think that was a good idea after seeing Episode 1.

I just finished it and I’m kinda tear stained and the first thing I couldn’t get out of my head was just how much it reminds me of the late dear John Hughes movies from the 80s. Those of you who are a little old like me born right at the beginning of the 90s, will have been brought up on those movies filled with 80s synth music, stories of growing up, artsy camera work and filled with colour and emotion. Those movies are some of my all time favourites and I absolutely felt their influence on Episode 1 and maybe the rest of the season, I don’t know! I really wonder if P’Meen used them or was aware, hahaha. Anyway...!

But first off, I cannot, and I mean CANNOT handle the music. Part 1 really did floor me with the use of the score and how it was such a huge part of the reason it was so beautiful. Phuket Dreams has me in tears about 3 notes in... so cue me crying at the remixes of the old score with 80s synth sounds and almost Dream Pop echoy sounds. That right there is my jam, my absolute favourite music and the way IPYTM is so clearly going to be full of it makes my heart very happy. Especially those last scenes with Oh, that sweeping 80s style music taking him from heartbroken pain to dancing to forget had John Hughes all over it and just felt so impactful. So I will bang on every week about the music I’m sure.

As for the beginning and the casual buying of condoms (yesssss god damn Nadao, thank you for safe sex lessons for LGBT+ youth and a nod to actual sexual expression, I’m mega proud) leading into the way Hoon and Suri were involved (they didn’t give me Tuty 😭) in transferring Teh, it felt like such a gorgeous transfer from ITSAY vibes to IPYTM... watching Teh’s mamma so proud, Hoon watching over him as always and then gently leading into the first moment that made me cry...

How dare they put a remix of the old score over Teh being told by his mamma that she accepts him as he is so casually and softly, in a way that not only lets Teh know he’s loved but welcomes Oh as someone she cares about deeply and is happy being someone her son loves. It was beautifully done and I couldn’t help but think of Teh’s teary face on the Cape at the end of Episode 5 and thinking how proud I am of him. The way Hoon stroked his hair - help.

Teh. Now I made no secret of the fact that I loved every moment of watching Teh go through it in Part 1, how his very physicality and struggle played out especially him writhing all over his rug! But we had to see him grow. He isn’t the same boy he was but he still feels like Teh, just a little more comfortable, a little more mature in some ways and just READY for life. He feels tentative but also prepared to grow more and I just adore him. Oh, on the other hand, the one who was much more secure in himself in terms of his self and sexuality in Part 1 is now absolutely thrown into the unknown and isn’t handling it well.

Oh was established so beautifully as a Phuket boy. His name is rooted in his home, he lives in shorts and by the sea, he’s shaped by that place and what it means to him... his signature scent is coconut! He literally embodies Phuket... so it doesn’t in any way surprise me that we are watching him flounder and feel lost. It feels so human and so many moments felt so moving. When he told Teh that the best part of his day was seeing him, when he imagined the waves on his mind, when he listened to his mamma talk about the coastal weather... it’s hardly surprising that he cried as he was asked to explain his name. That was the second moment that got me. I was a wreck. Watching him break down and fall to pieces infront of total strangers just because he was recounting the meaning of his name, the foundation of who he is, the thing he misses to very much... he doesn’t fit, he doesn’t feel at home and he didn’t feel himself. It was beautifully done, for me. I caught my breath the second he started crying because it was so utterly human and raw. I have felt the way he does and recognised every second on his face. PP has come so so far with his acting.

Then we get the mention of Yongjian. NOW SOMEONE TELL ME IS THAT TEH AS YONGJIAN IN THE TITLES? If so, how dare they spoil it?! I am going to weep uncontrollably if Teh gets his dream. But the way Teh spoke of their future, the way he tried to recreate their past with Yongjian’s speech. Their entire history as friends and boyfriends is rooted in that story, that character, the idea of being Male protagonists... and Teh is so sure of their future. Also, you cannot also avoid the meta of it all with BK and PP. That moment and their words felt so personal to them too and their own real lives!

Do not even start with how their first kiss in Phuket was underwater and arguably their first kiss in Bangkok is the same albeit in public. DO NOT LET ME THINK ABOUT THIS TOO MUCH.

The issue is that, Part 1 set out for us how they ended up where they are. Oh fell into acting, it was never his dream from the start. Then it all became a fight, a thing to win from his rival and in the end a thing to prove. We haven’t really ever see Oh show a passion for the stage and acting, not really. He worked so hard to get his place in Uni but there’s so much irony at play. Their entire story of rivalry has actually caused this current situation. Oh “won” the coveted Uni spot (helped in part by Teh) and Teh “lost” and was making do. But we see how that’s not how life goes. Oh never really felt he knew what he wanted and so he just ploughed on. He’s now in a situation where he has to start deciding, has to be his own person and he’s just... lost. I can’t wait to see him find it whatever it may be! The difference with Teh is that he may not have got his number 1 desire but his passion is ENOUGH. He loves what he’s doing and that moment where Khim (is that her name, I forget now, it’s so late, but Goy’s character) was explaining the lights was gorgeous. Teh’s passion was ignited, you could see that “oh wow” moment... and you can see the difference in how they’re going to progress, Teh didn’t need the top Uni because his passion can carry him and will help him succeed whereas Oh doesn’t know what his passion is and perhaps he’s where he is for the wrong reasons after all. The story telling is lovely to me, if completely heartbreaking.

The tears came again at “but I’ve already given so much of our time to other people”. Oh the tears. The boat scene from ITSAY is my favourite scene of the show and that line is one of the most beautiful bits of writing I’ve encountered for a long while... and to see Teh use it and remember it and effectively set out the issue they’re facing was heartbreaking. They made that promise on the boat and they’re breaking it. Oh-aew is trying to be what he thinks Teh needs and Teh is wide eyed and filled with this new world and getting to indulge his passions. They’re both so human and both trying the best way they know but they’re so young and so unsure and have so little life experience that they don’t know how to be adults or how to manage all of this stuff. They know they care and love and are each other’s person but they have such a lot to learn.

So the introduction of Q and the boys... and let me say they’re glorious... feels both beautiful and tragic because they look like they will be accepting and also potentially LGBT+ themselves or maybe Q (I see your gorgeous painted nails, sweetheart and the way you didn’t question Oh saying “partner” for a second)... but also they’re what Oh is using to fill the time he promised to Teh. It’s not Oh’s fault. He deserves friendship and a world of his own too but he was relying so much on the familiarity of Teh and Teh’s presence to keep him grounded and comfortable but he can’t do that all the time. He is trying so hard to be good and thoughtful and kind that he’s not telling Teh the truth. He’s doing what he said he wouldn’t do on the boat, but we can’t blame him in the slightest, he’s the sweetest boy.

I have so much to say but I guess that’ll do for now. I really loved the episode. Yes, it’s different but I think I realise now why it needed to be. In a way I’m kinda of happy about it because ITSAY stays sacred!!!! It stays as that beautifully fraught and emotional indie movie of my heart filled with metaphorical depth. It can’t be touched as far as I’m concerned but with IPYTM it feels just as moving, just as emotional, just as impactful but in a different way that reflects maturity. I don’t think it would have worked if it still felt fraught and characterised by ITSAY vibes. They’re not kids, they’re not insecure about who they are anymore in terms of their sexuality and they are moving into adulthood.

I know it’s going to break me. Episode 1 had me genuinely crying into my tea but I also know that it had the potential for its own special brand of symbolism and meaning. We can already see some special moments which seemed to be saying way more than the words themselves like the speech on light and how we see things and the way Oh even used it himself to see a different perspective at the end. That felt really very meaningful. They’re going to need to be able to see different view points as they navigate what will probably be a shit ton of pain! They will need to adjust to the light, to their circumstances to be able to survive and for their bond to be what is important without allowing other stuff to pass into their line of sight. Oh saw nothing. Empty stage, no Teh, not even himself... he opened his eyes too soon. He needs to learn to adjust and learn how to see the world and his place in it so that when he opens his eyes he sees what he desires and has worked for and made for himself rather than emptiness.

The last thing for me is the chemistry. What more can you say other than they’re perfect? They have the most natural, enigmatic, intense and sweet chemistry. They work so beautifully together. They sell even the smallest of moments and they absolutely destroy with emotion. I just feel every second of Teh and Oh’s emotion and that is such a damn skill. Their talent, man.

So I loved it. I am going to be dreaming tearstained in 80s synth music tonight! I can’t wait for the rest to emotionally destroy me a little more.

[scuttling]

Newbie

Fandom: Criminal Minds Pairing: Aaron Hotchner/Latina OFC Sophie Cortes Word Count: 3,786 Tags: SFW, Pre-relationship, Self-confidence issues, Canon-typical violence Summary: On Sophie’s first day at the BAU, she gets nervous. On Sophie’s second day at the BAU, they get a case. Collection: Sophie Cortes timeline, 0-6 Months at the BAU (See Masterlist for reading order) Link to A03 or read below! On Sophie’s first day at the BAU, she’s a little bit nervous—change your outfit three times, run your Keurig with no cup underneath, hair up? hair down? hair up? nervous—so she takes a deep, steadying breath before pushing open the glass double doors that lead to the bullpen.

She took cues about attire from other people she saw the day of her interview, so today she is wearing a simple black and white dress with pumps and gold jewelry, and she feels she fits in, but she gets more than a few curious looks when she enters.

Her instructions are to report to Agent Hotchner’s office first thing, but she is stopped on her way there by a tall, handsome, impeccably dressed man with a frankly gorgeous smile. He’s Black, with a shaved head and a great voice, and suddenly she doesn’t mind the interference.

“Hi, I’m Derek Morgan. You’re Sophia Cortes, right? Hotch mentioned you were starting today.” She smiles warmly.

“Yes, pleasure to meet you. You can call me Sophie,” she says, reaching out a hand for a shake. “Agent Hotchner told me you’re from Chicago, and so am I. Please say you aren’t a White Sox fan.” His smile becomes even brighter, if possible. She might be halfway in love with him already.

“God, no. If you want to watch good baseball, it’s the Cubs all the way.” She laughs lightly, happy to have a little rapport with a new colleague so soon.

“I’m glad to hear it.”

“I’m glad there’s a little more color in the office now,” he jokes, and she understands where he’s coming from completely. It’s bad enough to be the only woman in the room, sometimes, but when she’s also the only person of color, she feels… inadequate, somehow. Like she has to work twice as hard to be seen, even though she literally stands out among her peers.

A blonde woman with a fair complexion and pretty, almost doll-like facial features steps up behind him, and he looks over, introduces her.

“Sophie Cortes, this is Jennifer Jareau, our Communications Director.”

“Everyone calls me JJ,” she says with a smile and a handshake.

“Nice to meet you. If you’re the Communications Director, you’ve got the toughest job in the unit, then.” JJ looks surprised, then nods her head.

“Absolutely, but don’t tell them that. They’d never believe you,” she says with a playful shove of Derek’s shoulder. “Don’t let being a profiler go to your head like this guy.”

“Who, me? I’m as down to earth as the next devastatingly handsome guy.”

“Yeah, right,” a voice says from her right, and Sophie turns to see a woman approaching them with pale skin and dark hair, bangs, a kind smile. “We love you and all, but you’re a little cocky.”

“Is it being cocky when I’m that good, though?” he asks with a wink, and Sophie already feels more at ease just hearing them talk with each other. She can get acclimated to anything when the environment is right. “This is my partner, Emily Prentiss. Prentiss, this is Sophie Cortes. The new newbie.” She sets down her bag, heads over to shake hands.

“Nice to meet you, Sophie. Love the dress.” Sophie thanks her for the compliment. “I appreciate you taking the newbie title from me; fair warning, you’ll probably be here for five years before they stop calling you that.”

“Ah, I’ve been called worse, I’ll take it.” She glances around their workspace, looks up to Derek. “Is my partner here? Dr. Reid, right?”

“Oh, he texted, said his train is running late,” JJ explains. “He’s really excited to meet you, though, so don’t mind if he’s a little… overwhelming, when he does get here.”

“You’ll fall in love with the kid, everyone does,” Derek explains, and it makes her heart feel warm. This is definitely a team she wants to be a part of. “But he can be intense.”

“I appreciate the heads up.” Before she can say any more, Agent Hotchner descends the stairs, heads toward them.

“Good morning. I can see the team has taken the liberty of introducing themselves.”

“Hello again, Agent Hotchner.” Sophie shakes his hand, and he smiles softly.

“Hotch, please. You can put your things in that desk and I’ll give you a tour, if you’d like.”

“Sure, sounds great.” The team shares a brief look, but she doesn’t know them well enough to comment, just stows her belongings and follows the unit chief. “The team was very welcoming. They seem really tight knit,” she comments as they leave the bullpen, and he looks at her, nods.

“When you spend as much time together as we do, traveling as we do, it’s inevitable. Was it not that way in Intelligence?”

“You couldn’t get those people to sit down to dinner together, let alone tease one another. They’d probably bite each other’s heads off.” They worked well together, but in private the environment could be pretty toxic. She knows Unit Chief Roberts wouldn’t have put up with it if the team didn’t get such good results.

“I can see how this environment might seem a little strange, then,” he says, opening the door for her. They take the elevator.

“Strange, but good. It reminds me of when I was a cop, and I’ve missed that kind of camaraderie.”

“Well I’m glad you felt welcomed. We really are happy to have you.” They approach a closed door which he raps on lightly; the woman who answers has a bright smile and an even brighter outfit, lime green and navy blue, with matching accessories, including green glasses. She makes Sophie feel very… plain.

“Oh, hi!” the woman says, and her grin gets bigger. “Wow, you’re beautiful.” Sophie laughs, a little taken aback, and Hotch sighs lightly like he’s used to the odd behavior. It’s all very endearing.

“This is Penelope Garcia, our technical analyst. Garcia, this is Sophia Cortes, our new profiler.” She reaches out a hand.

“It’s nice to meet you. You can call me Sophie, or Cortes, whichever you prefer. And you’re beautiful, too. I love your style.”

“Thank you; I can tell we’re going to be fast friends. You’ll have me on speed dial,” she says, walking to her desk and jotting something down on a pink Post-It. “If you need something researched, narrowed down, blown up, compared, etc, I’m your girl.” She hands her the note—her direct line—and smiles. “I’m sure you have much more to see, but don’t be a stranger!”

Something tells Sophie she won’t be.

He shows her all around the office—copiers, the breakroom, supply closets, restrooms—and they end up in the briefing room, the last two to walk in.

“You remember Gideon,” Hotch says, and the man nods a greeting. Still as personable as ever, she thinks. “And this is your partner, Dr. Spencer Reid.” She’s not surprised by his age—she read some articles about him once she had his name, knows they call him ‘boy genius’ quite literally—but she is a little thrown by his nervous smile, his dark eyes, his untidy flop of brown hair. Derek wasn’t kidding when he called him kid; he looks like he belongs at an after school chess club meeting, or something.

He’s adorable. Like a puppy. She immediately wants to keep him. She smiles wide.

“Sophia Cortes, but you can call me Sophie, if you like.” He stands, and they shake hands. “It’s a pleasure to meet you, I’ve heard all about you.”

“It’s nice to meet you, too. I hear you’re from Chicago. Did you know Chicago is home to 2,716,450 residents living in over 100 neighborhoods?” She smiles wider.

“Yeah, with 600 parks, 500 playgrounds, 29 beaches, and 26 miles of open lakefront. It’s beautiful. Have you been?”

“We worked a case there, once. I didn’t get to see any parks or beaches.” He makes a frowning kind of face and she laughs softly, takes the seat Hotch offers her.

“Well you’re young, there’s time.”

“Now that we’re all caught up on introductions, we can get started,” Hotch states, and Sophie’s first morning meeting begins.

It’s a little boring, as far as first days go, but she doesn’t mind. She has access to her computer, gets it set up the way she wants, finds out from the team where all the best places are nearby for coffee or drinks or lunch. She meets with the section chief for introductions, goes over some policies with Hotch—who, she was right, is definitely funnier and more thoughtful than he must let on. He probably feels like he has to act a certain way, because he’s the boss, but she likes pulling the human out of him, makes it a personal mission going forward to make him smile.

He’s too handsome not to smile. On Sophie’s second day at the BAU, they get a case.

“I usually like to let new profilers get acclimated to the team before going into the field,” Hotch tells her as they board the plane, “but it didn’t make sense to keep you in Quantico. Are you sure you’re up for it?”

“Of course. That’s why I’m here, I want to help.” She stows her bag overhead. “I’ll observe, give my input when I have it, follow everyone’s lead.”

“Sounds good. You know you can come to any of us if you have questions.”

“I know. Thank you.”

They do a deeper debrief on the plane—three women have been murdered, all in their mid 30’s, athletic and blonde, last seen dropping their children off at school—and Sophie is tasked with going to the most recent crime scene with Hotch and Prentiss.

“What can you tell about him so far?” Hotch asks her while the detective on the case speaks with Prentiss about some details of the scene. She glances around the room, takes it all in.

“Well, there’s blood everywhere. Serious overkill each time. He either knew the victims, or has a deep-seated hatred for a woman they remind him of; my money is on is the latter.” She looks through the kitchen, at the bloody footprints that lead to the back door. “Tracked blood all through the house, left the back door open. He’s disorganized. He may have seen them at the school and planned to follow them home, but he didn’t do any pre-surveillance on them. Something about these women triggers him and he acts within the hour.”

“Would you call it a crime of passion, then?” She looks over, curious, then realizes he’s testing her.

“No. A crime of passion indicates some level of culpability by the victim. Provocation. These women are just in the wrong place at the wrong time with the wrong face.” He nods, satisfied with her answer.

“So how do we think he’s finding the victims?”

“He could have a child under his care who goes to that school, or he could live near the school, work there. He could work the night shift somewhere else and pass the school on his way home. I think it’s too early to narrow that down.”

“Any idea what weapon he used?”

“We would have to really examine the cast off to be certain, but my guess would be… a hammer, or some other small, blunt tool. This wasn’t done by a baseball bat or a shovel or something larger. We can also get an estimated height and weight of the unsub if we chart the area void of blood here,” she adds, pointing to a bare spot on the wall with blood droplets above and around it. “I’m guessing we’ll send the photos to Garcia for analysis.”

“That’s right. I agree with your assessment,” he begins, but she senses hesitation.

“But?” He looks over at her, thoughtful.

“We’re missing something.”

“We are, or I am?” she asks for clarification, and he smiles just slightly.

“We are.” She takes that as a good sign, walks another loop around the room for something they would have overlooked, and she brightens when she thinks she’s discovered it.

“Her purse is still here, cash, credit cards. Her jewelry was still on her body when she was found. But does it look to you like something’s missing from the entryway table?” She points to it, and it’s very ordinary: a calendar, a bowl for change, hooks for keys, a couple of photographs—with a notable blank space in the middle. “Maybe a photo?”

“We should ask the husband if he knows what was there. Good work,” he tells her, and he heads off in the direction of the husband; she follows close behind.

Back at the precinct, the team fills each other in on what they’ve learned.

“So our unsub killed each of these women with a ball-peen hammer, striking 8-10 times. Blood spatter analysis puts him at about 5’11”, 6’0” tall, around 275 pounds. The photo taken from the third victim’s house was of the victim and her 7-year-old son Josh; similar photos were taken from the other two homes—photos of mother and son.” Prentiss tacks copies of the three missing photos to the board.

“Sounds like maybe the woman they remind him of is his mother,” Reid states.

“That’s what we’re going with. We’re still not sure how he finds his victims, though,” Prentiss mentions, and Sophie takes a breath, hesitates.

“Do you have something?” Morgan asks and she shrugs, unsure.

“Maybe? One of the theories we threw out there was that he works overnight and drives past the school on his way home from work, when the kids are being dropped off. If he killed them with a ball-peen hammer, maybe we should look for machine shops in the area with overnight shifts? Those are typically used in metalworking, not construction.” She feels like all eyes are on her, and it makes her nervous. “That could be completely irrelevant, it’s just a thought.”

“It’s a good thought; I’ll have Garcia pull us a list, we can split up and pass around the description, see if our guy is a metal worker. Good call, newbie.” Morgan leaves to take the call, and JJ leans over with a smile.

“Don’t second guess yourself. You’re doing great so far. Theories are important, even if they’re wrong.” Sophie returns the expression, nods.

“Thanks. I’ve just gotta get used to the collaborative environment; haven’t been in one of those in a while.”

“You’d never know it. You’re fitting right in.” She takes it as a compliment, is happy to be of some use to the investigation and not just getting in the way.

The rest of the day is pretty quiet; they test out a few other possible theories, deliver the profile to the late shift, plan to hit the school early in the morning to look for potential suspects and to pass around the description to see if anyone meets it who works there, or lives nearby.

She goes to the school with Reid and JJ, speaks to teachers, janitorial staff, but none of them know a man like the one they’re looking for. She meets up with the others, who were speaking to parents, after about an hour of questioning, but they also come up blank.

“We’ve still got your machine shop theory,” Reid says as they drive back to the precinct. “The others should be done with those soon, so there’s still a chance we can find this guy today.” JJ’s phone rings, and she answers on the car bluetooth.

“JJ, there’s been another attack,” Prentiss says. “1419 5th Street—you guys are closer. Can you head over?”

“We’re on the way,” JJ answers, turning right, and Reid looks thoughtful.

“An attack? She’s not dead?”

“No. Not yet, at least. She’s being rushed to the hospital; her husband was home, caught the attacker in the middle of it all.”

“Did he get a good look at the unsub?” JJ asks.

“He’s with a sketch artist now. Hotch wants you to circulate the sketch ASAP; we think we may have a hit at one of the metal shops, if you can send it to me, too.”

“You got it.” She ends the call, looks at Sophie through the rearview mirror. “Drinks are on you tonight, newbie,” she says playfully, and Sophie can’t help but laugh. She had been so intimidated by the thought of joining the BAU, and she’s glad to see she’s useful, can actually help make a difference. It’s a feeling she won’t forget for a while.

Later that night, when they plan to try to catch the unsub before he leaves for work, she deflates, a little.

Hotch, Morgan, Prentiss, and Reid are going to breach the unsub’s house while JJ covers the front door and Sophie covers the back. She had assumed she would get to be part of the team going in, with her tactical background, and immediately thinks the worst, that they’re happy to have her brain, but that her body is a hindrance. Too short, too weak… it’s how she’s been treated her whole life, and she hates to think that she’s being dismissed here so soon for the same reasons. She tries not to let it show, but she dwells on it, a little, lets it get her down even though she knows she shouldn’t.

She snaps out of it when there’s movement on the back porch, a hulking, shadowy figure in the darkness.

“I’ve got him coming out of the back,” she whispers into her comms, and she draws her gun and points it at the unsub. “Stop, FBI!” The guy turns to face her—he fits the sketch to a tee, a real mountain of a man as the blood spatter analysis suggested—takes one good look, and goes running in the other direction.

Alright, so, he’s clearly not impressed. She can work with that.

“He’s running, I’m in pursuit.” She holsters her weapon and her boots pound the grass as she books it his way. The good thing about being so much smaller than him is that she’s much faster, catches up to him fairly easily, and again, she shouts for him to stop, which, of course, he doesn’t.

Her first thought is that she’s got to get this guy on the ground no matter what—this isn’t a shoplifter or something, he’s wanted for murdering three women and attempting to murder a fourth, so a little force is okay if necessary, and judging by his build, it’s going to be necessary.

Her second thought is, if I can’t catch him, I don’t deserve to be here. And that’s the one that makes the decision for her.

She leaps onto his back, grabs fistfuls of his shirt, and shakes him forward, backward, forward again, trying to throw off his balance. When he starts to wobble, she slides down his back, hooking a leg around one of his and driving her knee into the bend of his; he goes down, face first, and she reaches behind her for her cuffs, slaps them on his wrists before he has a chance to turn or stand. “Jason Farber, you’re under arrest for three counts of murder and one count of attempted murder.”

“Attempted murder?” he asks, turning his face so he can speak more easily. He seems pretty calm for a runner, maybe just resigned to his fate, and she leans over so she can see him better. He’s breathing fine, uninjured, and just looks pissed. “You mean that overbearing bitch isn’t dead?”

“Yep, sorry to be the one to tell you, Jason, but she’s alive and kicking.” She continues to read him his rights, and is just pulling him to his feet when Morgan and Hotch skid to a stop behind her; if they look surprised… who is she kidding? They look surprised as fuck.

“Damn, Cortes. This guy’s like three of you,” Morgan marvels as she walks him back toward the cars so he can be tossed into the back of a black and white. “Did you make him an offer he couldn’t refuse?” She scoffs at that, and even the unsub snorts in amusement.

“She tackled me. Wasn’t counting on that.”

“I don’t think anybody was,” she admits, getting him into a cop car and shutting the door. She joins the rest of the team, gets a high-five from JJ.

“Hey, score one for the ladies. We never get to do any tackling.”

“She did better than I would have,” Reid admits without shame, and she laughs.

“It’s all in the legs. I lift chains at the gym.” He gives her a look like he’s got no idea what she’s talking about, which almost makes her laugh again. “You do pull-ups, but with chains around your legs.” She demonstrates, squatting and gesturing to her legs like she’s wrapping something around them.

“Okay, you’re the real deal, newbie,” Morgan says when she stands up fully. “Remind me not to run from you unless I want a face full of dirt.” The group breaks apart after that, but Hotch lingers, gives her a meaningful look when she makes eye contact.

“I bet that felt good.” She leans against the side of the SUV, feels a deep conversation coming on.

“It did. I’m stronger than I look, and sometimes it’s fun to be underestimated, but other times it gets really annoying.”

“I can imagine,” he says, nodding, and he mimics her posture. “I just want to make sure you know you don’t have anything to prove. I hired you for a reason.”

“I know. But I don’t like being a one-trick pony, and I’m definitely not waiting around for one of you guys when an unsub is on the move.”

“And I wouldn't expect you to. As for the ‘one-trick pony’ thing, that’s not how I see you at all. You’re extremely well-rounded, and that’s why I wanted you.” His eyes are kind, but penetrating, and she dips her head, nods.

“And that’s why I don’t want to disappoint you.”

“After what you’ve shown me the last two days, I don’t think that’s possible, but I want you to know you can come to me when something’s bothering you. That’s why I’m here.”

“I know. I won’t forget it,” she assures, and he stands fully, cocks an eyebrow in her direction.

“I heard drinks are on you tonight,” he says with a straight face, and she laughs lightly.

“I guess we better get going before they run up the tab, then.”

They walk in companionable silence back to the SUV.

[konaizumi]

A Tale of a Thousand Stars ep 10 thoughts/reaction

here we go

damn, phupha’s really been whipped from the start, huh?

awww, tian leaving the sticky notes for the next teacher

i can’t handle this, why are goodbyes so sad

you know what? im usually crazy about child characters very much but i would absolutely die for each of the children

meejoo wanting to be a teacher like tian 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

even khama tearing up at having to say goodbye and the rest of the village crying, how could tian ever leave them???

“this might not be as good as your designer clothes” ofc its not its way better

phupha you told him to leave forever and don’t even have the guts to say goodbye

the way tian’s voice wavers when he says 1 2 3

if his parents could see this group hug they never would’ve made him come back home

the parallel of him crying as he walks away from the villagers as he loses them once again

tian really said this is my jacket now

i called it, last week i predicted tian would finally see torfun’s wish and it would turn out that he had already fulfilled it

tian writing about all the things he doesn’t have to do anymore despite the fact that he is now doing those things

the product placements used to be horny but now they’re just sad

it’s the little details, like tian going back to having the parted bangs when he’s in bangkok that are a bit more stylish but when he was in pha pun dao (and when he’s back in the post credit scenes) he didn’t style his hair

tian, i’m glad you found a love for northern food but i can’t help but be reminded when your doctor specifically told you not to eat spicy food

tul knows what’s up

character A talking about character B then the scene cutting to character B sneezing is one of my favorite troops in asian media lol

dr nam also knows what’s up (and everyone else in the village)

i think i understand tian a bit better bc i feel like last ep i was kind of confused why tian just accepted leaving when there wasn’t anything truly forcing him to do so, but i think it’s bc tian has always had this mindset of following what his parents want so he thinks of that future with his parents as somewhat set in stone even if the path there is flexible, so even though i wish he hadn’t had to leave the village i do think it’s important that he had this period of realizing that he can choose his own future

i like mr winai, he’s cool

the metaphor of the flower being tian, when he’s coddled too much by his parents he withers, but when he really experiences life and faces it he blossoms

also “the place that fits you will make you grow”

it must be so frustrating for tian to have gone through all that, to have finally put his all into something, to have experienced all the ups and downs and then to have everyone reduce that experience to just “a rich kid having some fun pretending to struggle for a little while”

okay but how prestigious a university do you need to go to for teaching tho? like not to reduce the difficulty of teaching or anything but does he really need to go overseas?

what with nam flirting in the eearly episodes, i wish he and the show had treated the wedding more as his wedding than just an excuse for phupha and tian to reunite, like marriage is kind of a big deal

“are you having a date?” yes

lol he’s marrying p’amp

unpopular opinion maybe but phupha’s suit is lowkey kinda ugly

on the other hand, yod and rang look fantastic

now i do think it was important for tian to finish his degree and spend the two years teachings but in an ideal world they would’ve reconnected at the wedding and kissed and gone back to pha pun dao together

poor tian tho, thinking phupha is specifically avoiding him, that shit hurts

i still can’t tell if phupha was actually avoiding him bc i feel like if he was he wouldn’t’ve come back and he seemed surprised to see tian

yes, good job nam, get his phone number

phupha, you coward

the song that plays when phupha comes is so good and the lyrics fit the situation so well, honestly this whole sequence of phupha staring at him then tian returning back home while this song plays was for me one of the most emotional scenes this ep

“it keeps my heart warm”

tian, no amount of distance will make you forget phupha

more sad product placement

in ideal world #2 phupha would’ve goon to the airport to stop him not just send him off

also, tian in the black turtleneck with phupha’s jacket is a look

that phone call though with the long silences as neither is quite sure what to say and they’re too emotional to say more

the whole airport scene has really got me fucked up

just everything about it

phupha saying he wouldn’t be able to forget him and he doesn’t want them to forget each other

that hug tho

and then the second one

and the mom’s reaction has me cracking up, poor woman is the only one with zero context for this whole interaction

kiss him on the lips you coward

okay but the rangers taking over as teachers while waiting for the new one is adorable

also the kids teasing phupha about tian some high quality content

“where is the angel now?” “In the US probably” “he just avoids saying it directly” im gonna say it again but i would die for these kids

i think my biggest complaint about the ending is that we never see tian’s reunion with the kids, i kept waiting for that

okay but did tian suggest faking the security threat or did one of the other rangers suggest and tian was like “perfect”?

its sweet that he buried the notebook on the cliff, that’s where torfun would want to be put to rest

phupha, what did you see your endgame being if it wasn’t tian returning to pha pun dao?

also, earth looks really good in the lighting of the sunset

then earth’s softer version of the OST in the background (i still like aye’s version better bc its amazing, but earth’s is nice too)

lol phupha used a pick up line on tian

the post-credit scene gave me life, it is everything

the hug from behind

tian just stepping on phupha

tian’s “beg me”

phupha is so fucking whipped and tian knows it

“just sleep?”

when gmmtv decides to make our skyy season 2 there’d better be 50 whole minutes of just scenes like this for them

the way they’re laying in bed parallels the first time they slept next to each other

i can’t believe it’s over, y’all, like what a journey, i truly wasn’t expecting the story to be so emotional and dramatic but i really have loved it so much and while i’m glad we’ve finally gotten to the happy ending, i’m so sad to say goodbye. i don’t think fish upon the sky will be quite as good or be so impactful, but nevertheless i’m excited to start that next week and i hope it will be a good addition to frigay and give me something new to be excited about each week

[buckyskorpion]

11 hours - part six

Pairing: Biker!Bucky x Reader

Summary: bucky is the mystery you can’t wait to solve. if you can get out of his bed long enough, that is. a biker au.

Warnings: gang-typical violence, sex scenes, alcohol mentions, probably more to come so stay tuned

A/N: so i was gonna leave this on ANOTHER doozy cliff hanger but i genuinely thought i would get lynched so i decided to just leave it at a baby cliffhanger. a lot happened in this chapter and a lot of seeds have been planted for future chapters..... so lemme know what you think hehe. predictions?? angry letters?? pitchforks??? lemme know!! i wont be taking tags for this so please dont ask.

title taken from 11 hours by wet | playlist | please donate to my ko-fi!

masterlist 

“You’re very calm for someone with a gun to their head.”

Honestly, you had been thinking the same thing. Sure, your stomach feels like a snake pit and your hands are sweating and you don’t think you’ve ever been more aware of your own heart beat, but other than that - you don’t understand why you aren’t panicking more. There are three men standing in front of you, one behind, all with guns. They’re wearing matching leather jackets with an octo-head patch on the sleeve, and they all look very scary. Briefly, you wonder if Bucky has a jacket like this, with a patch on to match his family. It’s an irrelevant detail you can’t help but fixate on right now.

Bucky. Hopefully listening on the other end of the phone you have tucked in your back pocket which your kidnappers haven’t been bothered to check yet, thankfully. You flex your wrists against the zip ties holding you to a chair and ask, “Where am I?”

“You should know,” your stalker turned kidnapper says with a condescending sneer. “You followed me here.”

“The Lerna?” you clarify, for the sake of hopefully someone on the other end of your mobile picking it up. You glance around at the old-style bar; chipped wood and beer stains, a rickety pool table one of your stalker’s friends is using as an arm rest. You curl your nose up at it - a little proudly, you note it has nothing on Sam’s bar.

“Do you recognise the place?” your stalker asks. That throws you. You want to ask what he means by that, why you would recognise this gross bar you’ve never stepped foot in, but you clench your teeth and school your face.

Once your dad sat you down in a chair much like this one, in his office at the house you grew up in. You were eleven, maybe, and you didn’t quite understand why he was tying your hands to the back with a necktie but you went along with it. He did this, sometimes - would orchestrate some strange lesson when his nightmares got really bad, his ghosts chasing him inside the house until he saw enemies in lampshades and kitchen cabinets. To keep you safe, he would say, and then he sat opposite you and asked what you would do if anyone ever put you in this position against your will.

“Kroshka, they will use anything against you,” he had said, and you see that now with the way these men are looking at you for any weakness. But you didn’t understand then, you were a kid thinking your dad was spiralling again, so he had cast around until he found a beer bottle on the coffee table. “See, like this. When the label is flat it’s fine, but as soon as one little corner lifts you can’t help it - you have to peel it all the way off. Don’t give them any corners, kroshka.”

You blink, once. The man in front of you scowls when you don’t answer, presses forward into your space in a show of intimidation. You try not to flinch, but that fear you were missing before is starting to set in real fast. What did he mean, do you recognise it? And why the hell are you so prepared for a situation like this, almost as if your dad has been training you for it since you could remember?

“Fine,” your stalker says, his breath fanning over you with how he’s leaning into your space. “Maybe you can answer something else, about your boyfriend.”

“Dunno who you’re talking about,” you say. It’s not a lie - technically, you hadn’t had the ‘boyfriend-girlfriend’ chat with Bucky yet. This man is not appreciative of your loopholes. He grabs your hair and yanks your head back, pressing his glock into your neck. You shiver, both at the pain and the cold of the metal. Through gritted teeth and mild hyperventilation, you say, “As a matter of fact, I dunno who you are either. That’s kinda weird, dontcha think?”

You can practically hear Bucky in your head telling you to shut up, but he’s not here right now. No corners, just like your dad said. Doesn’t mean you can’t try and find some corners of your own.

What you meant as a question to buy some time, with a bit of attitude on the side, sends your stalker reeling back from you. He’s confused, eyebrows drawn down low and his friends behind him look to each other with the same expression. Now, you’re confused as well. Everyone in the room stands (or sits, in your particular predicament) in a pure state of what the fuck is going on. It would be funny, if there wasn’t still a gun to the back of your head.

“You don’t know the patch?” the man asks, gesturing to the sleeve of his jacket. When you don’t respond he continues, slowly, reiterating his question from before but as a statement, “You don’t recognise this place.”

You have zero idea what’s going on, but whatever you’ve said seems have thrown your kidnappers for a bit of a loop, so you decide to roll with it. You say, and hope to god the man standing behind you doesn’t shoot you for it, “I’m starting to think you’ve lost control of this situation, pal.”

From the corner of the room behind you, a familiar husky-toned red head says, “Funny, I was thinking the same thing.”

Shots ring out, shattering the windows as one by one your stalker’s friends drop like dominos. Someone crouches behind you and cuts you lose with a knife, and you hear it clatter to the floor as they launch over the back of your chair feet first into your stalker. Natasha. The flash of her red hair over your shoulder as she sends him flying is unmistakable. You scramble from the chair, fumbling for the knife she dropped but your hand slides through something thick, wet. The man behind you with the gun lies dead, throat slit, his blood now all over your fingers. It mesmerises you in a sickening way, making your stomach turn and your vision go fuzzy.

You’d never seen a dead body before. Now they are all around you, the bar smelling like blood instead of beer and the sound of bullets pinging off glass the only noise other than Natasha grappling with your stalker. She’s so small compared to him but she has her thighs clenched around his throat and he gasps for breath, clawing at her legs. You watch, stunned, as he gets a grip on her and throws her off, sending her crashing into the wall with a groan.

She hits the floor and you see red - all you can think is that’s Bucky’s family and that man is walking towards her, his gun trained on her body as she tries to pull herself to her feet, so you stop thinking at all. You picture the back of your stalker's neck like the dartboard at Sam’s bar and you throw.  

Bullseye. Just like your dad taught you.

The man drops, knife buried in his neck and haemorrhaging blood. He gurgles this awful, awful sound as he clutches at his throat, trying and failing to push the blood back in. Natasha looks from your still outstretched hand, trembling in place, to meet your gaze. You can’t begin to decipher her expression, nor do you want to. You feel like you’re going to throw up, or choke, or scream, or all three. The man you just stabbed in the neck groans in pain, eyes rolling, coughing blood from his mouth in thick clumps. You can’t feel your hands anymore.

The door bangs open and you flinch, stumbling back until you trip on the chair you had been tied to and fall to the floor in a crumple of limbs. It’s Bucky, eyes wild and larger than life with a rage you’ve never seen before. He has a huge sniper-rifle slung over his back as he strides into the bar, stepping right over the writhing body of your stalker.

“I’ll deal with you in a second, Rumlow,” he practically growls, kicking aside the man’s hand that tries to grab for him. You scramble to your feet, practically tripping over yourself to get to Bucky. Doesn’t it say something about you that you run towards the man responsible for the death all around you?

You crash into Bucky hard, the force of the impact knocking the breath right out of you and once it’s gone you can’t get it back. It feels like his arms encompass the entirety of you as he holds you so tight your feet leave the ground. His chest rumbles with words but you can’t hear him, your ears are ringing and your chest is tight because panic attack, you dumbass. You press your face into Bucky’s neck and hope that’s enough to escape the scene unfolding around you.

“Get her out of here, I’ll deal with this,” you hear Natasha say somewhere behind Bucky but you refuse to lift your head to see.

Bucky attempts to pull away from you to look at Natasha, you can feel him try and twist his head but the inarticulate whine that rips from your throat stills the both of you. It’s mildly embarrassing, the sound you’ve just made, but it’s out there now. Bucky shifts his grip so one big palm rubs soothing strokes up and down your spine and you feel yourself becoming boneless with every pass of his hand.

“I’m not fucking lettin’ him get away with this,” Bucky says, low, threatening - if you were this Rumlow guy bleeding out on the ground, you would be afraid.

“And he won’t,” Natasha says, and then like she has to remind Bucky of his own thoughts, “but you have other priorities right now. Get her out of here.”

You feel Bucky nod, his scratchy chin moving against the top of your head. He kisses your temple and holds the back of your skull with one big palm, pressing your face further into his neck. It means you don’t see the carnage of the bar when he moves to place an arm around your shoulder and steer you out the door, stumbling under his guidance on shaky, cotton-fuzzy legs. He’s hurrying you, but as gently as he can. Once you feel the bright burn of sunlight on your skin you pull back from Bucky’s neck, blinking in the now empty street and Bucky’s piercing gaze as he looks down at you.

“Are you with me?” he asks, his hand dropping from your skull to squeeze the side of your neck. You still feel like you’re sipping each breath through a straw but you nod. You can see in his eyes he needs you to be with him right now, to get out of here, so you try and blink away the fuzzies in the corners of your vision and focus on his face.

“I’m sorry,” you say, and christ, now is not the time for that stinging pressure behind your eyes you hate so much. You hope Bucky understands - sorry for not listening to him, sorry for getting you both into this mess, sorry for not being strong when he needs you to be.

Bucky shakes his head vehemently, tugs you in harsh and strong by the grip he has on your neck to press a bruising kiss to your forehead. Your eyes flutter close at the fierce way he holds you, presses emotion into your skin like the tattoos littering his skin - a brand of your own, in the middle of this eerily empty street with the blood of strange men on both your hands. The thought makes you shake, so you twist your fingers in the hem of Bucky’s t-shirt and breathe him in deep.

“I’m sorry, doll,” he says, then pulls away from you. He grabs one of your hands from out under his shirt and links your fingers, beginning to drag you down the street. Looking back over his shoulder, he says with a grimace, “We gotta go.”

He leads you to his bike, squeezed between a brick wall and a dumpster in a side alley a block away from The Lerna. It roars to life before you’ve properly swung yourself on the back, and you aren’t bothering with helmets this time as Bucky eases the bike out from it’s tight spot with unsettling ease. All you can do is hold on tight and close your eyes as Bucky leads you away, weaving through the city in nonsensical loops before you feel the air open up around you and the familiar sounds of Brooklyn.

Bucky takes you to Steve’s tattoo in Red Hook, the first time you’re been back there since that fateful run-in with Natasha. You’ve checked out completely by the time Bucky parks - he has to lift you off the back of the bike because your legs won’t work, and he all but carries you inside. Steve is quick to rid the shop of the two customers looking at designs out front as Bucky settles you on the couch by the tattoo beds. You sink into the faded red leather without feeling a thing. Distantly, you notice the kid who usually mans the tills looking at you like you’ve grown a second head, and you suppose you deserve that.

“Stevie, I think she’s in shock,” you hear Bucky say, and the childhood nickname makes you smile. You watch Bucky’s face crease up deep concern at the dreamy look on your face, so you suppose you should stop smiling like a crazy person. A giant blonde head swims into your view, just as concerned, and he drapes a blanket around your shoulders.

“Bucky,” you say, your eyebrows drawing down as you fumble for his hand. He squeezes your fingers and mumbles something to Steve who leaves you again, his voice mingling with the kid’s somewhere over Bucky’s shoulder but you can’t focus on that. All you can do is swim in the back of Bucky’s too-deep stare and say, “I killed him.”

“No, no,” he says, shifting closer between your thighs as he kneels on the floor in front of you. This would be funny to you in any other moment, something to tease him for as he takes both your hands in his and squeezes them together, silently imploring you to stay looking at him. He says, “That’s not on you, sweetheart, it ain’t. You didn’t kill him.”

You’re crying now, properly, which you suppose is a good sign because you don’t think people in shock can cry. You watch as something cracks in Bucky’s eyes as he watches you break apart, but you can’t stop now you’ve started. You say, “I did, I killed him. How do you do it? How do you just- I feel like my throat’s gonna close up. How do you live past this?”

Bucky’s face darkens, smoothing out to something stone cold and frightening. You don’t feel scared, though, as he leans into your space so close you almost feel cross-eyed trying to stay glued to the blue of his eyes. He searches your face for something and says, no room for argument, “You did not kill that bastard, you hear me?”

“But-“

“No,” he says, simply, and that’s that. “The only reason you were in that position is because of me, doll, so no. You didn’t kill him. It’s on me, and I live with that so you don’t have to. You got that? You don’t ever have to live with that.”

You don’t know how he makes you feel like he’s physically reached into your chest and pulled out your guilt through your throat, but he does. You can see it clenched tight in his fist, his eyes shuttering down dark as he shoves it between his own teeth to hold. It’s too soon for the feelings clawing at your ribcage but you feel them just the same, that cigarette burn he left on your heart aching so bad you could scream from it. You extract a hand from his to run down his cheek, along his jaw, cupping his face in your palm. He closes his eyes, shudders as though swallowing down the guilt for the both of you.

I love you for that, you think to the soft flutter of his eyelashes against his cheeks. I’ll love you forever for that.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Natasha returns to the shop, and Sam bundles in not long after that, the four bikers sit around Steve’s prematurely closed tattoo shop and have a family meeting. You can’t help but feel like the kid who’s stayed up past their bedtime to try and hang with the adults, the words flying over their head and sleep pulling at their eyelids but they fight to stay awake anyway. Bucky pulls your head into his lap as he sits on the couch beside you, so you lie there and let him stroke your hair while they discuss what happened over the past two hours.

Two hours, and that’s all it’s taken for your whole world to spin on it’s axis. You’d learnt to throw knives at tree trunks with your dad as a fun, albeit unconventional after-school activity. And now you’ve buried a knife in someone’s neck, you’ve been kidnapped and tied to a chair and watched Bucky gun down men from a rooftop with his sniper rifle. He pulled the trigger with the same fingers he’s carding through your hair now, nails scratching at your scalp in a way that makes your toes tingle. How is that at all ok?

“We’ve started a turf war with Hydra, now,” Sam is saying, sitting backwards on a chair facing Bucky and spreading his hands out in a placating gesture as Bucky bristles. “It was unavoidable, alright, I’m just saying.”

“Not necessarily,” Natasha says. “Rumlow has had a vendetta against Bucky for years. He could’ve been acting alone.”

“It is strange we haven’t heard anything from Pierce,” Steve says thoughtfully. He is pressing an icepack to Natasha’s back, already bruising from where this Rumlow guy threw her into the wall. She’s lifting up her t-shirt and you can see a glimpse of a back piece standing out stark against her pale skin. Giant, feathered wings and a talon, a mosaic piece of what looks like a large hawk spanning the length of her spine.

“When Pierce finds out it was us that shot up his bar, though,” Sam says, making meaningful eyebrow movements to the group. They all nod thoughtfully and fall into silence.

None of these names make much sense to you - Hydra, Pierce, even Rumlow who you’ve gathered by now was your stalker. Was, because he’s dead now, and the thought turns your mouth dry and rusted. You shift in discomfort, drawing Bucky’s attention down to you as he gives you a concerned once over. He had done a thorough analysis for any injuries, even after you’d assured him you were fine, but you can tell he’s still unconvinced.

Unfortunately for you, all your wounds appear to be mental. They’re getting deeper by the second.

“I keep thinking,” you say to Bucky, “why was he so surprised I didn’t know where I was? Or who they were?”

“Hydra is our biggest rival,” Bucky says, and huffs a laugh at your crinkly brow so he clarifies, “They’re another gang, one we’ve had a lot of run-ins with. Rumlow especially. He wasn’t our biggest fan.”

“So he expected you to have told me about him, and Hydra,” you say, the name unfamiliar on your tongue. He nods, and you have to ask, “Why didn’t you?”

Bucky frowns at that. “I already told you - the more you know, the more dangerous it is.”

“And I already told you, no secrets,” you say, frowning just as deep. A beat passes and Bucky doesn’t budge, just glares down at you like he can physically bore his opinion into your brain and make it yours. Exasperated, you say, “Bucky, it didn’t matter anyway - the danger found me. Telling me things like that isn’t going to make a difference.”

“It would’ve if you’d listened to me and not done the stupid thing,” Bucky says, raising his eyebrows. He may have a point, but you aren’t going to back down that easily. Bucky knows you, he knows if you see a loose thread you’re going to pull it. The fact he thought you’d listen to him tell you what to do at all is laughable.

“This gang is your life,” you say, and you don’t bother to hide your frustration now, “They’re your family. I’m no safer not knowing what’s going on - I got stalked and kidnapped regardless. Clearly, it’s dangerous no matter what, so just tell me, Bucky. Whatever it is.”

Bucky stares at you for a long time. Steve, Natasha, Sam - they cease to exist in this room with you. Those first few weeks, when you refused to stay the night in Bucky’s bed and would only see him to fuck - you used to be scared of looking into those eyes for too long, for fear of getting lost. Now you dive head first, a part of you hoping you do get lost so you never have to find your way back out again.

Eventually, Bucky clenches his jaw tight and says, “You’re right.”

You blink, surprised. You hear Sam whisper to Steve, “did you record that?”, and honestly, you wanna ask the same thing. Except the way Bucky is look at you- dread curls thick and choking in your gut. You look up at Bucky and he seem so far away, out of reach even though you feel him all around you. He continues stroking your hair but it’s absentminded, his mind far away too.

You are drawn back to the tattoo shop by Sam saying, “I gotta say, Barnes, your girl is smart as hell. Keeping your phone on you and out-smarting Rumlow in a hostage situation? Pretty badass.”

Bucky smiles briefly down at you, but it doesn’t quite meet his eyes. You turn to Sam and say, “I got the impression out-smarting Rumlow isn’t really that hard.”

Everyone laughs at that, even Bucky, and it clears away some of the dread eating away at your stomach. But it’s still there, acidic and bubbling no matter what you do to smother it.

Eventually, they grow tired of talking in circles about Rumlow and Hydra and the possibility of the feds showing up (Bucky assures everyone the cops will find no rifling on the bullets and won’t be able to pin them to the crime scene, but Sam mutters heard that before and an argument erupts about some debacle in Bucharest so you tune out). Bucky takes you back to his apartment, tucked securely in his leather jacket in the best kind of shock blanket you could ever ask for.

For the first time, you noticed the tiny embroidered star on the sleeve of his jacket. You wonder if all Bucky’s friends have the same star on their jackets, because they’re not just friends, they’re a gang. One you feel suddenly, irrevocably intertwined with since they’re the only reason you aren’t sitting in a jail cell for murdering someone.

You feel jittery as you walk into Bucky’s apartment, almost nervous. It looks the same as this morning, the coffee cups you used for Steve and Bucky still in the sink and hoodie of his you’d worn last night draped over a chair. But everything is different, now. It’s all changed, there’s weird new shadows over everything long after Bucky turns on the light. You linger in the doorway to Bucky’s bedroom while he rummages around for sweats and jumpers, laying out a pair for you before he begins changing himself. He shucks off his t-shirt and you see his tattoo sleeve, the mottled scars hiding underneath, and your heart flies out of your throat before you can stop it.

“So do you guys have a fun, spooky name like Hydra or what?” you ask, closing your eyes with a grimace as soon as you ask the question. What are you, twelve? Bucky doesn’t answer and you’re too afraid to open your eyes too see the look on his face.

You’re startled when you feel him kiss your cheek, sensing his large frame towering over you and blocking out some of the soft bedroom light. You open your eyes to find him smiling down at you, laughing at you with his eyes as he says, “Not so spooky. Steve named us, he called us the Howling Commandos. The HC, for short.”

You crinkle your nose up at him and he flicks the tip with his ringed fingers. You say, “That’s very old-fashioned.”

“Nat teases him for it all the time,” he says, “She calls us her barbershop quartet.”

You smile, imagining Bucky in suspenders playing the accordion, and say, “Now that I like.”

The longer Bucky looks at you the more sober he becomes, mouth becoming pinched and jaw muscle ticking. He holds you soft by the biceps and walks you back until you hit the wall, still gentle, but bracketing you in now so all you can see is the weight of whatever complicated thing is running across Bucky’s face.

“You scared the fucking shit out of me today,” he says. He shifts, grips your jaw tight so his rings dig into your skin with none of the gentleness of before - he means this. “Never do that again.”

“I’m sorry,” you say, twisting in his tight grip to press a kiss to his fingertips. He softens, allows you to pull him in flush against you by his waist, his bare skin so warm under your hands. “And, thank you. I don’t- I guess I’ve never had someone come save me before, I don’t know what to say.”

“Don’t thank me,” Bucky says, shaking his head. He kisses you, a rough press of chapped lips against yours and is gone again before you can react. Says, “I’m sorry, too.”

“Come back,” you say with a pout, and you have just enough time to see Bucky smirk down at you before he’s kissing you again. It’s just as fierce, almost painful, but the rough slide of it distracts from the burn in your chest and your racing thoughts like razorblades. You lick into his mouth, chasing away the ghosts nipping at your heels, and he presses you back into the wall with a thunk hard enough to leave a bruise on your tailbone tomorrow. You don’t care. It feels good to hurt in a way that’s physical.

The ease with which Bucky picks you up makes your head spin. It’s all you can do but pepper kisses along his stubbled jaw as he carries you to the bed, lips suddenly ripped from his skin as he dumps you on the covers. He is quick to follow, squashing you down with his tongue in your mouth before you can take another breath. This, you know. All the messy feelings and heartache and fearfearfear that beats in time with your heart, that maybe you’ll lose him or he’ll lose you and you came so close today, is unfamiliar to the both of you. But arching your back off the bed so he can take your shirt off, scrubbing your fingers through the short hair at the nape of his neck as he peppers kisses across your tits with a trail of goosebumps left behind - this is how you know Bucky best.

He makes quick work of your clothes and you fumble with his jeans, laughing into his mouth as he bats your hand away to do it for you. Bucky bites your bottom lip in playful admonishment and you chase his mouth as he tries to pull away. He places one big palm on your clavicle and pushes down, holding you against the bed. He shakes his head at you with a smile.

“Stay,” he says like he would to a dog, grinning wide as you glare at him. But you do as you’re told as he leans over you to grab a condom with his left arm. Maybe you bend the rules a little to trail kisses up the bits of his outstretched forearm you can reach. Over a shadowy skull, the stem of a rose, what looks like military windings near the crook of his elbow and tiny handwritten letters that spell S N S. Sam Nat Steve, because Bucky might be a tough guy to most but he’s a giant sap deep down.

Bucky shudders at your touch, and it makes you wonder if the scarring under his tattoos is extra sensitive. Or maybe he is just sensitive to anyone touching him in such a vulnerable place. You flick your eyes up to watch him watch you, lip drawn between his teeth and a dent between his eyebrows you ache to soothe if he wasn’t still holding you down. You don’t stop, even though he looks physically pained with every brush of your lips against his skin. You trace the edges of another small wolf with your tongue, like the ones on his chestpiece, and watch as his eyes flutter closed when you get close to the paper-thin skin of his inner wrist.

That hits Bucky’s limit. Suddenly his hand on your chest slides up to your neck and he’s leaning over you, left arm braced by your head and his mouth swallowing yours. You groan against his lips at the rough drag of his hands down your sides, gripping your waist tight enough to bruise. He makes your brain go fuzzy, the only coherent thoughts being Bucky and touch me more. He seems to understand. His fingers find your clit, smoothing slow circles which spark embers in the pit of your stomach. Bucky’s mouth falls open as yours does, as if to breath in the whine he draws from you.

“Fuck, you always sound so good,” Bucky groans. He buries his face into the side of your neck, taking advantage of your thigh trapped between his legs to rut against you while he continues playing with your clit. Every time Bucky gets filthy with you it’s like the first time, shocking and almost embarrassing in the sexiest way possible. Heat floods your cheeks and makes you lightheaded, unable to stop the moan he draws from you. You’re rewarded by Bucky’s teeth in your neck, the sensitive spot just over your pulse point, and if you’re being honest you could come just from this.

Bucky’s cock growing harder against your thigh, as his hips shift in rhythm with the circles he draws on your clit, becomes too difficult to ignore. To gain his attention you twist and nip at the closest piece of skin you can find, Bucky’s ear, and he engulfs you in a kiss which steals the breath right out of you. You buck your hips, hoping to nonverbally convey the demand get in me right now, and Bucky doesn't need any more hints than that.

He fumbles with the condom for a second and you take the time to sit up on your elbows and look at him. Bucky is so beautiful, drawn in harsh lines and stark contrasts. Tan skin turned paler against the opaque black of his tattoos, colour swirling in-between and it should be jarring, but you think he just looks like art. Bitten red lips, startling blue eyes pinning you to the mattress as he catches you staring - such bright, primary colours because he is a statement piece, and one you could look at forever.

Bucky grins almost bashfully as you stare at him, leaning back over you to kiss you soft and sweet in a sharp juxtaposition to the rough tumble which got you here. Again, he sends your head spinning when the tender kiss is punctuated by the unexpected push of Bucky’s cock in your cunt. He bottoms out before you can blink, throwing your head back out of the kiss with an untamed groan - both pleasure and pain, in the good way. Bucky drags his teeth from your lips down your chin and neck, biting a mark into your collarbone to set the tone for the bruising pace he creates as he pounds into you.

He doesn’t do anything in halves, you think. You gaze up at him with an almost dopey smile while Bucky fucks the literal breath out of you. You lift your hips to meet him as he bottoms out with every thrust, watching in awe as his face creases up in ecstasy - it’s you who brings him there. He palms your tits like he can’t help himself, loses control in your pussy because you make him feel that good, and the thought makes you giddy. Drunk, almost, as you drag your nails down his chest and nearly come once again just from the moan you draw out of this brilliant, dangerous, gorgeous man.

“You take it so well, baby, fuck,” Bucky pants, eyebrows creasing as the pleasure gets almost painful in its build. You know the feeling. Bucky’s mouth is always your undoing, rolling your eyes back into your head and the sounds you’re making turning positively feral. He kisses you again, more a slam of mouths than anything finessed, and says, “Never gonna get over this, never gonna get over how good you feel.”

“Bucky, you gotta-“

“I gotta what, huh?” Bucky grins at the pleasure-addled panic he brings you too, not wanting to come too fast but also needing to let go before you actually explode. He knows exactly what he’s doing, balancing on one hand to thumb harshly at your clit as he says, “You want me to stop? I don’t think so, sweetheart, I think you wanna come on my cock just like this, wanna hear me tell you how good you are, how sweet you are for me all laid out like this-“

Everything whites out as you come, hard, all your muscles spasming like crazy with the orgasm that rips through you. Bucky’s voice is drowned out, but it doesn’t matter what he’s saying anymore, he’s made you feel like you’ll never catch your breath again. Bucky thunks his forehead against yours, collapsing on top of you as the fluttering clench of your cunt around his cock becomes too much. His thrusts turn sloppy, his breath hot and ragged across your face as you press lazy, barely-there kisses to his cheeks - all you can muster in your fucked-out haze.

Bucky comes with his eyes closed, eyelashes tangling with yours, and you cling to him with all four limbs as he shakes through his orgasm. The release was so needed for the both of you, the events of the last twenty-four hours frying your nerves to the point where it was either fight, cry, or fuck. It feels so good to have Bucky on top of you, inside you, all around you in every single sense and it warms your heart in a way you didn’t know was possible until now. Until Bucky.

Maybe that’s the afterglow talking, and you should stop. But you can’t help but press another kiss to Bucky’s cheek, and another, over his nose and across his still-closed eyelids until you reach his mouth and he can kiss you back just as soft. You hope he gets it. You hope he feels it too.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You go to see your dad, eventually. The chaos of yesterday kept you attached to Bucky’s hip - you showered together in the morning, and he allowed you to pretend it was just the water and not tears soaking your face. But he made you cuddle with him on the couch and fed you an omelette like you were incapable of feeding yourself, and maybe you were, because the reality of what happened in that shitty Manhattan bar was starting to eat away at your executive functions. It took all of your strength to convince Bucky you would be ok and that you’d come back to him as soon as you were done, but it was time to pull on a thread you’ve been ignoring for far too long.

It turns out, that paranoid over-questioning part of your brain doesn’t turn off even during a traumatic event. Your dad lets you in without a word, tugging you into a side hug as you both walk to the kitchen to make tea.

The house you grew up in has taken on a different light since the Lerna. The kitchen chairs aren’t the same, reminding you too much of ziptied wrists and a gun in your face. Why can you superimpose the memory of Rumlow holding you hostage to one you have of being eleven and tied to a chair by your father? You shouldn’t be able to do that.

He nudges your hip, jerking you out of your staring contest with the dining chairs, and offers you a mug of tea. You both sit at the table, either end, the fruit bowl a mediator between you. He looks tired, old, like he always has somehow in your memories from childhood. He’s still your dad, the same man who always been there because he’s all you’ve ever had. He loves you, you know does. Ya lyublyu tebya, luna. But he has always been the first to say your paranoid streak runs a mile deep, and once you find a thread-

Well. Everyone knows how that ends.

“Do you want to talk about it?” your dad asks, and it’s like he knows you aren’t here to ask for boy advice or moan about a case or your skyrocketing rent.

There’s a lot you want to talk about. Why did I learn to throw knives instead of joining the soccer team, like normal kids? Why did I learn how to survive an interrogation instead of going to sleepovers, like normal kids? Why did you train me to question everyone and everything in this world, but I’ve always blindly believed you? Like a normal kid would, you suppose, the only normal you’ve ever really gotten. Always believing your dad is the superhero of six-year-old dreams, someone who would never keep you in the dark.

“No,” you say, taking a sip of tea. It burns your tongue to numbness, but you can’t bring yourself to care. We had the secret language for only us - why did I never think you might have secrets from me as well? You grimace into your tea and say, “Not right now, I’m sorry.”

“Tayny budut presledovat tebya vechno, malysh,” he says. Secrets will haunt you forever, little one.

You don’t dare look up from your tea as you say, “Ya dumayu, ty by znal vse ob etom.” I guess you’d know all about that.

He gives you leftover curry in a carry bag when you leave. Kisses you on the cheek and lets you go, but you can feel him watching you the entire time it takes you to walk down the street and out of sight. As soon as you round the corner you retch into the nearest bush, a well-manicured rose which you silently apologise to as it gets covered in your bile.

This guilt isn’t something Bucky can save you from - it feels like it’s eating you alive. You had never, ever thought you would get to the point where you’d be leaving a bug stuck to the underside of your dad’s kitchen table, but you suppose you never thought you’d be stalked and kidnapped either. You wipe the your mouth with the back of your hand as your stomach finishes emptying itself of tea and betrayal, and try to tell yourself you won’t find anything, you're just being paranoid. But you know you will.

Maybe you always have, and that’s why you’ve been too scared to pull on the thread you’ve known has been dangling in the back of your mind since you were a kid. Just one secret you wanted to leave, one dark corner you didn’t want to shine a light into. That’s never been in your nature. You spit the foul, acidic taste from your mouth onto a poor, innocent rose bud and think with just as much bitterness as the bile coating your throat, that’s not who my dad raised me to be.

Part 7

[anonymousbaev]

i love ur writing style!! i was wondering if u could write how the rfa + v and saeran would react to mc coming out as bi? and like,,,shes kinda scared they might leave her or smth?

 RFA+V and Saeran reaction to mc coming out as bi

Thank you so much for the compliment, you boosted my confidence in writing it even got me inspired to write this for you! (〃^∇^)ﾉ Also this idea is amazing, I hope I wrote it similar to the way you wanted it! I started at 6 pm and just finished right now at 2:43 am yay! WOOHOO FIRST HEADCANON REQUEST COMPLETE! I also saw another request come in while working on this so I shall begin on that one sometime soon too! Please lmk if anything here is disrespectful in any way. ENOUGH TALKING, ENJOY!  ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ

                                              !!WARNING!! 

                      !!PROFANITY AND TRIGGERING SCENES!!

☆Yoosung☆

☆ You and Yoosung have been dating for a month now, you both told each other everything. At first you were scared to come out to him as being bi, but coming further and further into your relationship, you felt an urge to tell him. Being bi was something you were proud of. Yet, you couldn’t help but feel a bit scared he would leave you. You know he’s supportive and understanding, he’s not someone who would judge you. However, having a trauma of your parents kicking you out from a young age for being bi… It left an empty hole in your heart that had yet to be mended. Why couldn’t they love you for who you were? You were still their kid they’ve always known…

☆However, your parents were old news now. If they couldn’t be parents that supported you no matter what. You simply didn’t need them either. You knew Yoosung weren’t like them. And so, you gathered up your courage to come out to him one day. He was fairly surprised when you’d told him you had something to talk about. So, the two of you went out to a café on a Saturday morning to chat.

☆ “Mc!” Yoosung waves to you at the table he had been waiting for you. You nervously wave back at him as you make your way to the table. You sit down with a awkward smile, “I hope you weren’t busy today. I know I kind of called you kind of out of the blue.” He rests his head on his hand on the table with a grin as he replies, “No worries! Besides, even if I were busy, I would always make time for you!” 

☆ As always, he was being so sweet.  “Oh right! What did you want to talk about? You seemed anxious, is everything okay, Cutie?” You gulp so loud he probably can hear it. You just want to get this over with. Being bi was normal. Why did you have to be scared to say it? “I’ll get straight to the point, I just wanted you to know that I’m bi. I don’t want to keep my mouth shut on this anymore...but please don’t leave me. I love you.”

☆ He sits up straight as he holds your hand over the table. “Babe of course I won’t leave you, I’d be a hypocrite if I did. Nothing between us will change, in fact with another part of you revealed to me, I feel even closer with you!” You start to cry out happy tears as it gets him flustered knocking down his cup of ice tea all over the table. ⋋_⋌

☕️ Jaehee ☕️

☕️ Jaehee and you opened the café just like any other day. When you took out the freshly baked sweets, it immediately spread throughout the café and out the  widely opened doors. The fragrance attracted in so many customers. The café soon became absolutely full. As you were helping a young lady and her daughter with their order, a small family catches everyone’s attention at the shop. The man who looks to be the father of a teen begins to lecture him. It causes a ruckus and with Jaehee too busy to notice making drinks at the back, you excuse yourself and head to the small family. “Excuse me, is everything okay here?” 

☕️ You try your best to be as nice as possible before he begins to shout at you too. “YES. EVERYTHING IS FINE HERE. WE’RE TRYING TO HAVE A PRIVATE CONVERSTATION HERE, IF YOU DON’T MIND I WOULD APPREACIATE IT IF YOU LET US BE.” You sigh trying to keep your cool, but you notice all the other customers rushing to hurriedly pay and get out. “I’m sorry sir, but I’m going to have to ask you to leave.” He bangs his fists down on the table startling both his wife and son, but it startles you the most. “HOW DARE A LOWLY WAITER LIKE YOU TELL ME TO LEAVE. WHERE’S YOUR BOSS, HUH? BRING HIM HERE.” He spits at your face, you start to get so uncomfortable.

☕️ “Hello, I’m in charge here and I’m a she not a he. Also I would appreciate it if you would stop throwing reckless insults at my girlfriend.” Jaehee appears from the back. She must’ve heard all the commotion and came out to help you. She pushes him away from you, pissed. BAEHEE I LOVE YOU!

☕️ “GIRLFRIEND? WHATEVER THIS PLACE IS UNBELIEVABLE. WOMEN SHOULD DATE MEN AND MEN SHOULD DATE WOMEN. This is why youngsters these days need more lecturing tsk.” The man rushes out obviously intimated by Jaehee as his wife and son follow him out with an apologetic look to both you and Jaehee. Jaehee doesn’t hesitate to follow after him and give him a proper lecture but stops when she hears a small whimper before crouching down to meet your eyes. You sob so upset at the man’s cruel and untrue words. You know everything he’d said is not true AT ALL but can’t help but remember his words are similar from the words of your mother, it brings you to the floor.

☕️ “What’s wrong Mc? I know his words were harsh but you know none of that is true. Don’t cry because of an insect like him. ” you nod agreeing with her before taking a moment to get your words out, “I know...I know but he reminds me so much of my unsupportive parents when I came out as bi to them.”

☕️ “Oh Mc, don’t cry it’s going to be okay. There’s always going to be so much negativity in the world. Whatever it may be, and that’s not gonna change. Yet, you have to know you have me. And I have you. That’s all that matters.” You hug her and the people that have stayed in the café clap as the both of you have chased the bad man out. You see Jaehee blush for being in the center of attention.┏(＾0＾)┛┗(＾0＾) ┓

🎤 Zen 🎤

🎤 You and Zen cuddle on your shared bed. You begin to feel your eyes close in Zen’s warmth, and you eventually fall asleep to his pleasing lullaby. Your phone begins to ring and when Zen thinks it’d be better to let it be and tell you when you’re awake, he sees it’s your dad. He doesn’t know what to do, you never talk about your family. But he doesn’t want to worry your dad from you not picking up, so...he picks it up. 

🎤 “Hello, sir!” He’s super nervous to be talking with your dad for the first time. Your dad is super confused and asks, “Who is this? I thought I was calling my daughter?” Zen carefully lays your sleeping body comfortably on bed out of his arms to sit up at the edge of the bed, he clears his throat. “Yes, you are. I’m her boyfriend she said she told you about me?” Your dad begins to laugh almost... wickedly? “Oh that girl never tells me anything after her mother and I kicked her out of the house.” Zen is so shocked he’s at a loss of words you never mentioned this...

🎤 Zen continued to quietly listen to your father a little...pissed? Maybe you have horrible parents like he did. He starts to really regret picking up your phone, he should’ve asked you first. Regardless, it’s too late to regret it now and your dad continues to chatter on, “I’m glad to know she’s all fixed now. She’s dating an actual man. I was so aggravated when she came out to her mother and I to be bi.” Zen quietly heads to the living room and quickly scratches his head in anger, did your dad just say fix? 

🎤 “Excuse me but, if anything it looks like you need more fixing than anyone else. Also, Mc has not been “fixed”. She’d been perfect and she still is perfect in the same way. Dare I say, please don’t call Mc or even show your face anywhere near her if these are the things you tell her.” He ends the call and sees your head down, sitting down near the bedroom door as if you’d collapsed. He rushes over to you and gently holds your shoulder. “Jagiya are you okay? I’m sorry I picked up your call without-”

🎤 “It’s okay...it’s okay as long as you won’t leave me.” you shake your head in fear as Zen raises an eyebrow with a questioning look. “And why would I leave you?”

🎤 “Because I’ve kept it from you! That I’m bi and that I have bad parents. You told me everything, but I told you nothing. You’re probably feeling betrayed...but I really do trust you I really do love you! I was just scared... I know you are nothing like my parents. Ever since I met you, all you have given me was love and support! But it hurts...my dads words...they come back to me everyday and it makes me feel like I should keep it a secret...” He sighs before helping you stand back up on your feet. He fixes your messy hair and wipes away your tears with a gentle swipe.

🎤 “Baby, it’s okay. I know you would’ve eventually told me everything. Don’t feel guilty for not telling me. These are things you tell me when you want to tell me. You just needed time to heal from your parents. Just...overall...please know I love you no matter what. I’ll help you get over their words. I’ll show you what your parents told you were just thorns on a rose. Nothing more than a tragic obstacle from your happiness. Don’t be afraid of something that makes you, you because of the words of someone unsupportive. I know how it feels to have bad parents.” He pulls you into a hug, he feels so warm. You grasp onto his shirt and sob into his abs. You’re once again reminded of how much you love this man. ●ᴥ●

♛ Jumin ♛

♛ You’re attending an fancy business party with Jumin at an fancy hotel. You’re more than happy to attend this party with him. After all, you’d helped him plan for this project with your great creative mind. Not to mention, he loved showing you off.

♛ You and Jumin arrive in a limousine as he held your waist ignoring all the reporters into the front door of the hotel. You both stop at the entrance, four bodyguards around you as he lifts your chin up, you smile so lovingly he gulps before placing a kiss on your lips. “Are you ready, my love?” You nod as you snuggle against him as he holds your waist. All the bodyguards are supposed to guard the entrance so you both enter the main hall alone. 

♛ After a few boring conversations of a few businessmen trying to kiss up on Jumin’s ass you excuse yourself to the snack bar much to Jumin’s dismay. Regardless, he nods and you walk away. All these delicious fancy food! You swear you are about to drool. While you’re wondering on what to eat first, someone calls your name and it’s not Jumin’s voice. You feel your heart drop as you clutch your chest before turning around to see your bully in the old days.

♛ Tiffany, she was the “perfect rich girl” at school. And this girl loved making fun of others. You’ve picked on by Tiffany and her followers all four years through high school. All for one reason, you were open about being bi. She and her friends would always call you the ‘gay commoner’. This bish doesn’t even know the meaning of “bi” 

♛ Your heart begins to pound as if old memories come back at you like a gun shot. “Wait, hah you’re Mc, right? Wow... this place stoops as low to allow someone like you to come in? A gold digging commoner bitch that married Han Jumin. Oh right, and you’re gay. Be honest, you’re with Jumin because of his money right? You probably have sex with girls behind his back-” Tears swell in your eyes as you throw a slice of cake on her face. It drips down to her dress ‘made out of gold’. “ARE YOU CRAZY? OH MY GOSH, THIS DRESS IS WORTH MORE THAN YOUR LIFE!” cliché shit I’m sorry. Your voice shakes, seeing her brings back your painful memories so vividly. “I can’t believe you’re still so uneducated after all these years! I’m bi not gay! And I see you’re still as immature as ever, haven’t changed that habit of picking on innocent people, huh? Also, you know nothing about my relationship with Jumin! I love him and I don’t care that you and other people point fingers at me. I have not once thought about being with him for money!” You feel a painful sting on your cheek as you look up to see that she’s slapped you.

♛ You bite your lips and she holds her hand up for another slap before she’s stopped with someone’s strong hand. Jumin holds her wrist as he looks at your painful mark, looking back at Tiffany in anger. Oh boy he’s pissed. He had rushed over as soon as he heard your faint yells across the room. “Jumin it’s okay, can you take me somewhere quiet...please?” He nods as he holds your waist to a balcony. The stars outside make you feel so much better as you smile bitterly. “Why was she hurting you, my love? I will make her pay for leaving such a painful wound. Please wait here my love I will call an ambulance right now.” You giggle a little before gently grabbing his hand. “I’ll be okay, please don’t, who calls an ambulance for a slap!” you continue to giggle before collapsing into his embrace. “I used to go to high school with her, and she’d always made fun of me. Because...I’m attracted to both males and females.”

♛ He furrows an eyebrow, “And...why is that something to make fun of?” You shrug, “I don’t know, but I think there’s more to her story. Still, that doesn’t make it okay for her to make fun of me.” 

♛ “Of course it’s not. I cannot personally relate to being attracted to both genders, however I do know that’s not something to make fun of.” You look up to meet him in the eyes, “That’s all you have to say? I just came out to you as being bi.” He smiles as he kisses you, “I love you.” You laugh, Jumin is not a man with many words in situations like this. However you do know that this ‘I love you’ is not just a simple confession of love. It’s his way of telling you that he supports you and nothing will change between the two of you. The next day you find a bucket of flowers with a 10,000 lettered apology essay from Tiffany. You later also find out Jumin has stopped partnering with her fathers company. They eventually go bankrupt. (¬‿¬)

👓 Saeyoung 👓 

👓 You shake as you look around you, you’re in a empty white void and suddenly, your ex appears in front of your eyes. “You’re bi? What so have you been going off with other girls behind my back?” He slaps you, pushing you down onto the floor. He wraps his hands around your neck so painfully. Your heart could jump out of your chest right then and there. You try to scream out, but your voices don’t leave your mouth. You shake your head denying him, until you’re finally able to open your eyes screaming, “NO!” You gasp for breath, you look around in your shared bedroom with Saeyoung. “MC?” Saeyoung sits up to see you. He scans your body to make sure you’re safe, “What’s wrong baby?” 

👓 You shake your head, “I... had a nightmare.” he smiles, “Haha, you’re so cute still getting nightmares. What was it about? Elizabeth the 3rd turning into a monste- ZzZzZz...” He falls asleep again holding onto your waist as his body slides back down to lay. You wrap your arms around his head with a bitter smile before beginning to break down, you gently sob unknowingly. Saeyoung wakes up again, both of your eyes squinting as he turns the lamp on. You take a glance at the clock, it’s 3 am. You feel horrible for waking Sae up.

👓 He sits next to you, gently wiping away your tears. “You’re okay. If it makes you feel better we can talk before going back to bed. What did you have a nightmare about?” At first you’re hesitant, but knowing Sae, the sweetest purest sometimes perverted cinnamon roll you ever know, you felt safe to tell him. Before a warning you blurt it out, “I’m bi.” he smiles as he caresses' your cheeks before he says anything, you continue to talk, “I had a nightmare about my ex...he would beat me up and be so unsupportive of me.” You continue to cry harder painful memories coming back to you, more vividly now that you say it. 

👓 He brings you into his arms, “Thank you. Thank you for telling me, you’re so so brave. Do you know that?” He smiles nuzzling his nose to yours. “You’re okay now. And I support you. I love you so much too. I, Saeyoung Defender of Justice will protect you no matter what.” You cringe at his last line, the both of you giggle as you both nuzzle each other back to sleep. 

👓 BONUS: Saeyoung never tells you but he hacks into old camera files and sends your ex into jail for emotional and physical abuse. ( ಠ◡ಠ )

🌚 Saeran 🌚

🌚 You are eating dinner with Saeran until you finally come out to him as being bi, it feels as though a heavy anchor on you had been lifted. He pauses for a second looking up at you nodding, he quietly continues to eat his dinner. You feel so upset, that was it? A single nod? You spent days thinking of the right day to tell him this. It took a lot courage to come out to someone. The single nod he gave you continues to replay in your head.

🌚 Clearly upset, you hurriedly shove down your food Saeran constantly telling you that you will get sick if you continue. It didn’t matter, you just wanted to get out of here. 

🌚 A while later...you’re in bed with Saeran, everything is so quiet. But Saeran notices how upset you’re after the incident. He mutters a “sorry” and you can tell he genuinely means it but you can’t help but still feel a bit sassy, “For what?”

🌚 “Sorry for being indifferent when you came out to me. Thank you for doing that. I appreciate your bravery. But I don’t know how to react- how you want me to react. Of course I’ll be supportive of you...but the wrong words would rather  be disrespectful...so...sorry...I don’t know the right words to tell you. I’m not good at this kind of stuff.” You kiss him as you pull him onto the bed. “Thank you. That means so much. I’m sorry too, I got sensitive.”

🌚 The two of you fall asleep so secure and loved in each others embrace.

♧ Jihyun ♧

♧ It’s been a week since you’ve came out to Jihyun about being bi, he was unconditionally supportive and loving. One day, You and Jihyun decide to go to the mall as you insisted in buying him new clothes. He was so bad at dressing himself. Without realizing it Jihyun brought his glasses and cane, even when he could see now with his eye surgery.

♧ He smiles wholeheartedly when you continue to be amused by all the cool stuff at the mall. Someone suddenly comes from behind putting a hand on your shoulder that was between you and Jihyun. Jihyun elbows them in surprise before calmly apologizing, “Ah, I’m sorry.” the man looked to be in pain but he tried to act fine as he said “It’s fine.” His friend in the back whispered “Wow look at his cane, he’s blind.” they all began to laugh. 

♧ You were about to shout at them but after seeing Jihyun simply just raising an eyebrow you just cross your arms at them before attempting to walk away. “Hey hey, I’m not done yet. Aren’t you Mc?” He roughly pulls your wrist, it makes you unwantedly unlink arms with Jihyun. “Hey, you are! Remember me? You tried to date my girlfriend.” You shiver as you realize him. Your old classmate. You had confessed your interest to his girlfriend during your senior years, however you had no idea she had a boyfriend. It wasn’t your fault, you’d even apologized to him and her afterwards. He’d never forgot you though when he sweared that the reason for him breaking up with his girlfriend was because of you. 

♧ Your stomach turned, heart dropping, as his glares came in to you like stinging daggers. Jihyun hides you behind him as he nicely tells them, “It would be better not to make a commotion here.” The men mockingly copy his words in a idiotic tone. Your anger boils, but Jihyun is calm as always. “Mc you’ve gotten greedier, eh? Women weren’t enough, now you want both men and women?” Your heart drops, as the anger in you all shred into tears. However, you hold them back. Where had it all gone wrong? After all those painful years, you almost forgot it all after getting into Rika’s apartment and helping everyone recover from their painful past. You forgot you had a painful past of your own, one you’d never recovered from. One that still lingers somewhere in your heart till this day. You shake yourself back to reality when you notice Jihyun holding onto your hand. 

♧  Jihyun shoves the man away like a feather with his cane when he attempts to approach the two of you. Eventually the security guards come and separate them from the both of you. Jihyun embraces you in his warmth as he reminds you, “You know all those foolish things those men said are not true, darling.” His words are rather short that what you’d imagined him to say. However his words are comforting regardless.

♧ Later you find out Jumin, Jihyun, and Saeyoung have been working on something but you don’t quite know what...you brush it off. They’ve been working on ruining the life of those two rude ass men at the mall. (⌒o⌒)

The quality of my writing started to drop from Saeyoung I’m so sorry. I might come back to them and fix them later on...∑(゜Д゜;)

[steve0discusses]

The Live Action Fullmetal Alchemist Movie Part 6: Let’s Kill Hughes

Hey guys, I’ve been having some issues with the blog not...updating my drafts. So in case you’re wondering, that’s where I disappeared to. Give a round of applause to the support team for finding a solution until it gets fixed but as of right now I’m on like a private window with my extensions turned off and writing this from both tumblr and a LibreOffice document. Hello ads, nice to see you back.

Last we left off, we were a hop and skip away to lab 5. In the anime, this was a sequence where there was a bunch of fighting with suits of armor, and they kept that in this movie, but...not the people you think would be fighting are going to be fighting.

Listen I’m not like super knowledgeable about the world of Matte painting, but I like that they’ve unintentionally made this world building where whoever is in charge of making these red bricks basically owns everyone’s nuts. Everything is made out of the same red bricks. Like I know this is a show about homunculi ruling the world but I feel like the red brick guy is hellllllla more egregious. Freakin Monsanto over here.

I assume they had a 3d model and was like “we can just keep using it” and damn, they sure did. And inside of this brick building is, unsurprisingly a lot more red brick (although I think this is partially, if not entirely, an actual real life set.)

This next part is...such a lesson in pacing. Not necessarily a lesson to follow, but definitely a lesson to learn from maybe their non-example.

(watch Hughes die under the cut)

And what’s interesting is that there were a lot of good lines in this upcoming segment. There were a lot of good moments—bu there’s just so many. Maybe too many. You gotta prune your script occasionally, it’s like a tomato plant.

Like I’ve been doing a stress garden to cope with quarantine and Covid and 3+ months of life endangering wildfires, and I learned that you gotta prune the sucker vines off your tomatoes, although sucker vines can also make tomatoes. It sucks to do because I love tomatoes, and I want as many tomatoes as possible, but when you prune the plant, you get bigger better tomatoes that are more worthwhile than the suckers that can infect your plant and make it really sick.

Sorry that made me sound like 5000 years old with that gardening analogy. If you need me to solve your small town murder mysteries, I’m ready.

So it’s like...kind of tragic that it came together as kind of nonsensical when you can tell that it’s so close to being something better.

Like we have some reason up to this point to believe that Ed would have a freak out here...but like...a sobbing on the floor screaming at the walls type of freak out? Was there enough time devoted to this blow up, or did he walk into this room and immediately start screaming? Because he sure did walk immediately into this room and start screeching like a broken bird.

Like last recap, which was about 2 minutes ago in screentime, was this fun and quirky montage with Hughes. Now we’re sobbing into this rusty factory.

And I know what’s going on because I’ve seen the anime, but if you haven’t seen it—would this emotional break down make any sense? We were told by Dr Marcoh, “check out lab 5,” but we were only going to this factory on kind of a wish and a prayer. I really wonder if people who don’t know this show could follow past this point.

And then while we’re still adjusting to “yo, Ed just took it from a 2 to a 10 like immediately” Al is like “Hey I noticed no one is paying attention to me, and I have to lay a wicked fart:”

and then both brother’s just have a freak out. Gotta all be freaking out in this random ass Unity asset that was probably also used for some college grad’s first battle royale.

Pacing is just everything. And what’s SO HARD about Full Metal Alchemist is that there really is a lot of content to cover, there’s a lot of emotions to go through, and when you only have about 7 minutes to cover what was about 3-4 episodes, if I remember correctly, it’s kind of a zany mess.

And if you were going into this movie hoping they wouldn’t illustrate Al as a large idiot baby, then you share the sentiments of most people who saw this movie. Al is like...kind of reduced to a whiny big baby and is...not cute. Like Al is low key kind of menacing throughout this movie, not just because he has this CGI armor thing going on, but also because Al is...so impressionable and unhinged.

Something that I didn’t appreciate enough when I watched the anime was just how important Barry the Chopper was for Al’s logical character development.

Yo...These bangs…

...I’ve realized that every show I recap here just has the worst hair styles. I honestly never thought much about hair at all until I watched like 200 hours of Yugioh and all of this movie and also 6 seasons of Once Upon a Time which featured some LOOKS (but only recapped like 3 episodes, sorry if I got some of y’all excited. That was when we had no reason to cap everything because the capping community for Once was very alive and very exciting.)

By hitting him with a wrench (Al does not feel pain, ps, so he doesn’t need to be hunched over like this) Winry reminds Al that Ed would not risk his life for a fake brother (which may be a line from the anime or the manga but I don’t remember) and crying just...a lot.

Like it felt as if she had to shoot all of this out of order. Same with Ed’s freak out here. Movie’s aren’t really shot in succession and it’s up to the director to make it feel coherent and logical...this felt scattered, like the actors really didn’t know what was happening in the scenes leading up to it so they just cranked it to 11.

And then I guess Ed was either so insulted that Al punched him or was so upset that Al made Winry cry (again, this movie really tries to sell the EdxWinry ship and from me that’s a really big compliment), that Ed just started laying punches to extend a fight scene that was kind over before it started.

But symbolically there is a lot nice things going on here, Ed only uses his fleshy hand so he bleeds all over Al, hurting himself as much he’s hurting his brother. Implying more than just this fight, but suggesting that their whole journey of trying to find this sorcerer’s stone is just going to hurt both of them in their quest to save the other.

And then Al says something along the line of “it hurts!” to infer that he’s got this broken heart which is when they both finally just freakin stop.

Such a shame the pacing, which was a mix of too quick, and too many tomatoes, kind of made it hella blindsiding.

Again this was so many episodes of FMA and they stuffed it into so few minutes, it’s wild.

Especially since Ed is like...he’s cast as an adult! He’s an adult! At no point in the movie so far have they called him a kid, and they’re not pretending that he is one. But like...he acts like such a child because in the original, he was one. And, while this movie steps so far away from the source material, if should have committed and either stepped completely away or committed completely. Of course “should” is one of those things where we’ll just never know. A wish into the ether of hindsight being 20/20.

But lets get to the thing that you all came here for. This is where this movie gets BONKERS:

So Hughes actually draws out a pentagram between the different places in Armestrias, including Ishvaal, leading us to think that he’s figured out the whole dealio of turning the country into an alchemy circle. But, for some reason only helps him find the real lab 5.

It didn’t...that’s a different thing.

And it has been a long time since I’ve seen the ending of this movie—and maybe it was so offhand that I forgot if they actually do bring up turning the country into an alchemy circle--watch me eat my words, it could happen—but yo, we are finally killing Hughes—but we’re over halfway through this movie. And you may wonder...so uh...what...then what could possibly happen? There’s too much anime left!

Now I’m glad they kept this scene really close to the anime, although I haven’t watched the anime in a hot minute. It’s kind of an iconic scene so you don’t forget.

Like I do genuinely enjoy the campy parts where they were bringing up some of my favorite nostalgia of the original.

and then when you are like “ah, this is exactly the same as the anime. I can relax and watch as all my expectations are fully realized.” This twist happens.

YAH.

It’s a change!

So in the anime we had a really fun arc where we were trying to save Lieutenant Ross for being framed for killing Hughes. It’s probably my favorite part of Full Metal Alchemist, actually, it was so clever and a really thrilling chase. It was also like...half of season one.

Anyway, they cut it. They reduced half a season into 7 minutes. I know that, because each of these recaps is about 15 minutes of the movie.

You may look at this recap and be like “wait...this all happened in 15 minutes??” because yeah, this all happened in 15 minutes.

The same squad of people we see in every single scene of soldiers comes up to arrest Ed, which is weird, because I thought this band of soldiers was the military under Cl. Mustang’s command so like…shouldn’t they be arresting themselves? Mustang was over the command of more than 2 people. If we are suspicious of Mustang’s buddies then everyone in this movie would be in trouble.

And that’s when I realized that these guys were just unnamed soldiers and not a part of Mustang’s band. They only had like this many extras and just hoped we wouldn’t keep track of who is who, but I KNOW I’ve seen these guys this whole time. There are only like 6 people in this army. I see you movie magic—I see what you’re trying to do.

Anyway, Ed gets thrown into an old timey opera house that occasionally gets to be used for Middle School graduations. Or maybe also a mortuary where they charge you for funerals.

Like I know it’s supposed to be the capital building but like...this looks so weird when it’s live action. I remember the anime had this kinda feel to it but in live action it’s like…

...this is a weird ass capital building…Why do they have curtains like a Granny Holiday Inn in Reno, Nevada?

Thankfully, Hawkeye is here to explain to Ed what just happened because we, the movie viewers, were kind of surprised by that plot twist.

Like there were many ways you can condense half a season into 15 minutes, and I dunno if I would have just changed the murderer. It is a solution you can do. You can just point blame on Mustang and skip that whole Ross segment but like….

…then why write the movie?

Obviously, they had to make the movie, it had already been funded, people were really excited about the idea, and I do not envy the people that had to hack and slash with the Full Metal Alchemist script, but it is interesting what they decided was important to the original content, and what was unimportant. All that stuff that showed how Mustang was brilliant and two steps ahead of everyone else? Unimportant. All that stuff we had that showed how Mustang cares a lot about protecting other people and also cares about Ed and Al? Unimportant.

It really changes the dynamic, and it’s kind of fascinating to go into this cold because it’s been like...a year for me since I’ve watched it...and just see how different everything is without all those supporting characters that when I watched the anime I just assumed were mostly useless (Though fun). Turns out they all had a pretty significant part of making me care about Ed, about Mustang, about Al, about all my main characters.

FMA is very character driven, and this movie is mostly just...plot driven.  There’s kind of a great debate in literature about plot driven vs character driven. Movies and TV tend to be very plot driven, because they are very expensive to make, so they follow pre-formatted plot beats like “Save the Cat” or “The Heroes Journey” and other ones (there’s several to choose from).

They’ve made a fine science out of at what point a TV show should introduce the main, at what point they should suffer doubt, at what point they should shun their hero’s journey, etc etc. They know it down to the page number of the scripts they are writing. I know this, because it’s readily available on the internet and people fight about it all the time. This is why a show may suffer developing a character—because they just don’t have time and they just don’t have the resources to do something out of the box. Movies doubly so, because every minute of film can cost thousands of dollars.

What’s interesting about this is that FMA, the original FMA, does follow these beats. It was a manga sold by a huge publisher so it had to follow those beats. But, it has managed to do it while still being character driven. Yo, that’s so hard to do. This story was already written to be hyper condensed and structured when it was made into a Manga, and then it was condensed again for an anime, and then it was condensed yet again for this movie. It’s like a game of telephone, and at one end you have a very character driven story, and then at the other, it’s just totally plot.

Like it’s just a really huge risk to take. This was really, really risky.

PS did you miss Shou? Did you think we’d be done with Shou Tucker? No. Because this movie is gonna end at some point and rather than introduce other people...we’re just gonna stick with Shou and only have one miniboss.

(It has a freakin radiator in it?)

So then this next part happens and it’s low key hilarious.

The whole time.

Mustang and Hawkeye knew what lab 5 was this entire time but Ed just never asked for some reason despite working with those two for what is inferred to be YEARS since his childhood.

Hey PS, did you miss that brick building? Because it’s back.

Anyway, Mustang decides to take this underground where we can recycle the tech crew posing as extras that we used in the shot above us. Would not be surprised if a few of these are someone’s husband or wife on set.

Usually when I watch a movie I don’t get this feeling so much. But this movie...the latter half is like...EMPTY.

...this is going to be all movies made during Covid, I just realized…

Mustang is stopped by an angry Lieutenant Ross, and then we get this series of events.

And when you’re like “...Sorry?” Mustang’s like “I can make it weirder.”

And he just, without any warning or anything, lights Lieutenant Ross on fire. Multiple times, and it’s pretty intense and everyone who’s holding a gun just watches it happen is like…

...well I guess it’s too late to just shoot the guy...

…and like do you seriously not carry around a fire extinguisher when you are trying to manhunt Mustang? This is the one guy you want to wear fireproof clothes around. You have the technology. You at least have the technology for buckets of water. Like no one want to throw a blanket on her?

Just want to...watch? I guess?

Mustang just looks like a nut from this series of events instead of a genius--which is what I think they were originally going for. The pacing does that, youknow? Pacing.

And, out of the corpse pile stands Envy.

Envy has a pretty good look, I appreciated his whole look and that unlike the anime where you only find out Envy is a guy because someone told you on a forum somewhere and you were like “wait WHAT?” the movie is live action so you won’t make that mistake and embarrass yourself online.

Ed has only ever seen Lust once, and she walked in from off screen, stabbed a guy, and walked off. He’s just like...having a time because he’s done zero research into homunculi, and really, at no point in this movie are we going to give him time to figure it out.

Also, there’s this shot where Lust and Gluttony just walk in from behind them in the tunnel and it’s like…

….so no one noticed these two just hanging out back there?

It’s so freakin funny. This movie is gold. I love it.

Now If you just got here, this is a link to read all these recaps in chrono order:

https://steve0discusses.tumblr.com/tagged/fma/chrono

Have a good one, and stay safe! 2021 has been...weird nuts...and it’s still January somehow??? Weird times. Overall, please stay safe, it’s weird out there.

Also, if you’re like “I don’t remember this scene actually” here’s the original Hughes dies scene that inspired the movie (since the movie definitely was like “we’re only going inspired for this one nerds, get mad”)--some shots were inspired cut for cut.

And obvi this is on Youtube so it’ll probably get taken down eventually, but that’s why it’s flipped.

[miss-smrxtiee]

-Unwanted Celebration-

MC (Riley Williams) x Drake

Liam, Maxwell, Hana, Olivia

Summary: Drake gets a little suprise on his special day. But much to his distaste, they’re not backing down.

A/N: I just REALLY wanted to be crazy with this because I had two cups of coffee and a lollipop my brother gave me so the sugar rush is REAL. P.S (MC is with Drake for this fic although I alternate between Liam and Drame because they are perfect)

Warnings: Swearing and a whole damn truck full o’ laughs and fluff.

Tags: (Ty for the support if you would like to be added or removed just DM me or let me know 💖❤️)

@ravenpuff02

@princess-geek

@gkittylove99

@texaskitten30

@sophie-and-shizuku

@kinkypot

-Masterlist-

-Prompt List- (ask me!)

————

BEEP! BEEP!

BEEP! BEEP!

WACK!

Drake groans as he wacks his alarm. I absolutely hate the fucking weekdays. Why do I gotta wake up so unreligiously early...

He runs a hand down his face before rolling out of bed and walking to the bathroom. He brushes his teeth in the mirror and grabs his AirPod Pros to listen to Spotify in the shower. He steps out and splashes on his musky Sephora cologne that his girlfriend insisted he try out, he has to admit it was half bad, after combing his hair he changes clothes and grabs his phone but right before he walks out the door he looks at the calendar that was hung beside his mirror and his eyes widen.

Oh hell no.

He frantically looks around. What do I do?! They can’t find me. But before he could make a decision...

BANG!

The door was dramatically kicked open and Riley and Maxwell threw party hats at him playing Ayy Macarena by Tyga as well as jumping around him in circles.

Too fucking late...

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARSHMALLOW!!!!!!!!” Riley squeaked throwing her arms around his neck and Liam, Hana, and Olivia walking in behind the two with smirks.

“I told you I hated birthdays.” Drake growled at Liam for reminding them.

“Might of let it slide... oopsie!” Liam said with a smirk you could practically hear.

“WOOOOO MY MANS B-DAY BE 2DAY!” Maxwell said popping some champagne and plopping a tiny party hat on Drake’s clearly annoyed face while Riley laughs.

Riley attempts to pinch his cheeks into a smile but he glares at his friends and she fails. “Come on!!! Lighten up Marshmallow!” Riley said bouncing on her toes while Olivia takes a swig if her champagne and Hana tries to hold off her laughter.

“Please don’t tell me we are having a party.” Drake said, pinching the bridge of his nose while a headache creeps up. Hana and Maxwell are to busy doing the Macarena to the song that they didn’t hear them but Liam and Olivia walk up and explain.

“We mighttttt of reserved a VIP table at this popular club that I heard had great whiskey.” Drake lifts his eyebrows at the mention of good whisky and the two laugh noticing his mood shift.

“MY MAN.” Maxwell yells from the make shift ‘dance floor’ they had set up in the middle of his bedroom with a small speaker which was now playing Party Rock Anthem by LMFAO.

“Max, chill please my head is about to explode.” Drake desperately pleaded but Maxwell shook his head and started jumping around chugging his Champagne.

“WE GON’ GET LIT TONIGHT” Maxwell squeaked. Riley cheered and he shook his head before turning back to Liam who was practically dying from laughter.

“you are so fucking dead Rhys...” Drake said with a growl, only making Liam and Olivia laugh harder.

—————————-

Later that evening...

“You can’t be serious Williams...” Drake growled at her looking back at his outfit that matched with her dress. It was a simple black dress shirt and his usual jeans which was no problem but..

The damn party hat....

“It looks cute on you!!” Riley said adjusting it on his head before grabbing his hand and pulling him outside to the car where the rest of their group sat cheering.

“So you dragged the beast.” Olivia said with a smirk as he reluctantly sat inside.

“Oh shush.”Drake glared and everyone laughed. Maxwell turns his attention to Drake while the car starts and rolls down the palace driveway.

“DrAkeEe!!! You’re like, ancient now!” Maxwell teased and Riley slaps His shoulder. “Don’t be mean!” Riley said in a stern but still playful tone.

“Fiiiiiineeee, But you gotta at least have some fun tonight!” Drake just stared at him and Riley both as they used their best puppy dog eyes.

“...Fine, I’ll have. A drink or two.” He answered turning away while they all said ‘yay!’.

“Only a couple thought...” he clarified.

—————————-

20 minutes later...

“WOOOHOOO!!!” Maxwell yelled out on the dance floor taking his 4th shot with Drake.

Welp, screw a couple.

“Hey Baby! Look at this mechanical bull!” Riley squeake, Liam chose a western style pub that was close to the palace, he didn’t think it was that bad.

“You have to try it!” Riley said over the music.

“Uh-Uh, no way am I doing that.” Drake crossed his arms and tried to walk away but Riley dragged him to the enterance and his friends gather around to watch.

Ughhhh

“Pleaseeeeeeee” Riley pleaded, giving him a nudge toward the platform and Drakes shoulders slump.

When she looks at me like that I can barely think let alone say no to her.

“...Fine.. but only once!” Drake said and they all cheer as the bull starts rocking back and forth.

This isn’t soo bad

Faster...

Still not horrible

Faster...

Okay, I like a challenge.

Faster...

Oh yikes

Faster!!!

Drake suddenly falls off the bull and everyone starts cheering and laughing.

“Drake: zero, Bull: One” Maxwell said throwing back another shot and he laughs while Riley jumps up and down, excited he gave it his best.

“Max, I’m gonna have to cut you off soon.” Liam said while he and Olivia stand there like 2 parents watching over their kids do stupid shit on the playground.

“hEll naw Li Li, Im’ b whole new manz toNIGHT!!” Maxwell said throwing his arms around his shoulder. “I’m thinking Wellmax...” he stretches out his hand and moves it across their line of vision and Liam and Olivia laugh.

“That’s just a mixed up version of your name Max.” Hana said walking up.

“You just gotta chillax, like Drake over here.” He points at Drake.

“I’m not going to ‘chillax’” Drake said with a scowl.

“Sometimes, the people who deny the chillax, are the ones who need to chillax the most.” Maxwell commented while dragging Riley who dragged him out into the dance floor while they all danced to Conò by Jason Derulo.

————————————

30 minutes later...

“YOU’LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVEEE!” Maxwell protested as Liam dragged him out of the pub.

“Nope, too much alcohol for you today bud. It’s time to go home.” Liam responded, placing him in the SUV.

“Weeeeee!!!” Riley squealed while Bastien rolls her into the back seat next to Drake while Maxwell is at his other said and the others make their way into the car.

“dRake. My MANZ. How whus the NIGHT, we got LIT.” Maxwell clapped his shoulder and Riley snorts.

“Yeahhhh lets get you two back to the palace...” Drake responded and Riley plants a sloppy kiss on his cheek and falls asleep on his shoulder.

“Daumn, that looks comfy.” Maxwell said, imitating Riley and Drake sighs in frustration. Out of the corner of his eye he can see Liam snap a picture.

“Hey!” Drake exclaims while Hana, Olivia, Liam, and even Bastien try to hold in their laughter and Drake just shakes his head.

“You are all insufferable...” Drake mumbles loud enough for them to hear it.

“Yeah but you love us anyways” Liam said batting his eyes at him dramatically and they all laugh.

“Yeah. I guess I do.” Drake answers looking down at Riley and kissing the top of her head and mouths ‘I love you’ keeping his mouth there. He feels a wave of exhaustion flow over him and in a matter of minutes he’s asleep with his head resting on Riley’s and Maxwell’s snoring completing the scene.

“Well aren’t they adorable.” Olivia sates with a smile.

And with the 3 drunk baby acting adults, they drive home, only to do it again the next time...

Thank you for reading! -💖Sol

[artificialqueens]

Girls Interrupted, Chapter 2: She Wants To Dance Like Uma Thurman, But She Can’t (Vatya) 2/2 - Maeve

A/N: Hi, it’s Maeve here, and holy fuck this is long! Sorry for the wait, everyone, it’s been a real time. I’ll admit that I spent a lot of time collecting firsthand accounts of real teen parties because homegirl has never been to one of the cool kid ones. I feel no personal shame! I hope you all enjoy it. I’m a one woman show over here, but I’ve tried to be as accurate as possible with the characterization of the queens. There are some parts of this chapter that might be a little confusing, but that’s because the story is told through Katya’s eyes and she doesn’t always have all of the information. She will soon, though! As always, constructive criticism (really feedback of any kind) is welcome. If there’s interest, I’ll drop my sideblog one of these days. Here’s some petty teenage bullshit to take your mind off of the outside world.

What do normal people wear? What’s ‘in’ with the youths? Katya furrowed her brow. She grew out of following trends in middle school. The clothes weren’t her, and they didn’t magically assimilate her into a friend group either. So Katya was no manic pixie dream girl, more of a manic sexy carny And that was okay…most of the time. There would be a wide variety of teens at the party—Alaska ran in many different circles—but all of them had eyes, and Katya wasn’t about to make Alaska question her judgement over unironically worn Hawaiian print. She’d have to pass for artistically different. Dresses were risky, so Katya opted for a pair of skintight black denim shorts and a well-worn Warner Brothers Studios shirt. A good french tuck and a statement jacket were just enough to polish off her shabby-chic ensemble. It would have to be good enough.

Katya’s freshly washed hair had dried in loose waves that framed her face beautifully. Two things she refused to guilt herself into were shaving her legs and putting on makeup, and she wore her bangs down to hide the hairline she was so self-conscious about. It wasn’t like she was trying to impress anyone. Katya had given up on that a long, long time ago. She glanced at the clock. It was only a few minutes past 6:00. Living in a constant state of perpetual anxiety was a real bitch.

Katya sighed, Wheel of Fortune and Diet Coke it is. Her parents were at the neighborhood’s annual Back to School Barbecue, so she had the entire house to herself. She hoped there would be a familiar face or two—or at the very least caffeine—at Alaska’s house.

Katya could hear the music coming from the inside of Alaska’s house through her massive front door. It was a hot and humid evening, yet Katya chose to linger in the yard. She wasn’t the first one there, and she wouldn’t be the last one, either; there was just something about crossing the solid oak barrier that made her presence…pressing. Awkward, even.

Alaska wouldn’t have invited you if she didn’t want you to be here, Katya reminded herself. She knew this was true—Alaska Honard was an absolute sweetheart—but her paranoia got the best of her. She pulled out her phone and sent a message to ‘Bianca del Realest’:

I’m outside. Walk me in? I don’t wanna know if pigs’ blood comes out of denim.

Her phone vibrated seconds later with a response from Bianca:

Pussy.

Soon, the door opened, revealing a smug Bianca del Rio. Katya grinned, “Yes, I do have a pussy, mama, and I’m serving fish all night.”

Bianca howled, “I don’t put things in me if I don’t know where they’ve been, and you’re a filthy whore.”

“You rotted cunt! That was a rash, not a herpes sore!” Katya protested.

“Just get your ass in here, Zamo, before the neighbors call the police to report a solicitor on the premises,” Bianca stepped aside so Katya could enter.

The first thing she saw was an ornately framed oil painting of Alaska and her family. It had to be at least her height. “Holy mother of pearl…” Katya gaped.

“Mother of Alaska, actually. Father and sister, too,” Bianca corrected. Katya gave her a shove. “What? I do this out of love, honey.” The blonde rolled her eyes. “Come on, there’s someone I want you to meet,” Bianca grabbed hold of Katya’s arm and steered her towards the kitchen.

Alaska’s kitchen—which was a literal gourmet kitchen—was relatively empty save for an entire island of snacks and several coolers with drinks. She could still feel the thrum of the bass in her teeth, but the walls muffled the music’s full volume. What Katya found most shocking was actually who was in the kitchen. Trixie Mattel was leaning against the sink in a pair of light wash jeans and a flowing pink top.

Wow, Katya’s eyes went wide. She was in the same room as Trixie Mattel, about to be introduced by their apparently mutual friend, and she desperately needed to be able to pull herself together.

“Oh, honey, send in the clowns!” Trixie exclaimed, noticing Bianca’s return.

“I prefer to be called an erotic clown,” Bianca shot back. Katya snorted. “This is the creature I was telling you about.” Bianca gave Katya a small shove forward.

“Hi, I’m the chemical burn from the spiral perm, Trixie Mattel,” Trixie introduced herself extending a well-manicured hand. “I sit across from you in English, but we’ve never really talked.”

“Yekaterina Petrovna Zamolodchikova. But your dad just calls me Katya,” Katya winked and took Trixie’s hand, gently kissing her knuckles. Inside her head, Katya was screaming, Fuuuuuuuck. However, Trixie’s smile only grew. The life-sized Barbie doubled over with laughter.

Trixie turned to Bianca, “I’ll keep her!” Katya scrunched up her nose. She didn’t realize she was for sale.

“Just make sure to walk her often. She’s not house trained,” Bianca warned.

Katya wasn’t given the chance to retort because the door that connected the main room to the backyard flew open, and all three girls reached to cover their ears as Travis Scott’s voice grew three times as loud. An out-of-breath Jinkx Monsoon stood in the doorway, and her mouth began to move.

“What?” Bianca shouted over Sicko Mode.

Jinkx came further into the kitchen and screamed, “I said the hotshots just pulled up! If you don’t wanna get trampled, we should probab—”

“Bottoms up, bitches!” Willam shouted from somewhere in the hall. A cacophony of voices seemed to flood the space all at once, and then the kitchen was swarmed with all of the juniors on the cheer squad and football team. Hands and bodies were everywhere. Katya, standing at 5’1”, was swept away in the sea of future frat boys. Thankfully, the kitchen was only a stop on their route, and once the kitchen had been successfully raided, the four girls could get their bearings.

Jinkx straightened her dress. “Leave. I was going to say leave,” she finished her earlier thought and slumped against the kitchen island. “The real party’s out back. Now with added kegs.”

“Now, this I gotta see,” Bianca chuckled, “You in?” Katya shrugged and followed Bianca and Trixie past the horndogs sucking face in the living room and into Alaska’s massive backyard. She didn’t know what she’d gotten herself into, and she didn’t see it getting any better.

The glass doors let out onto a patio with a cabana and firepit. Stone steps led down to yet another seating area and a resort-style pool filled with floats, fountaints, and colored lights. There must’ve been at least a hundred people outside. She’d never seen so much illicit activity in one place. What was the word? Collusion? Collusion. Collusion vibes but not in a good way, Mama. We’re all going to hell, Katya swallowed thickly. The blonde was overwhelmed by the sweaty bodies, loud music, and flashing lights. Was this what a rave was like? The kegs by the pool were a happening place, and she planned to avoid them as much as possible.

When she looked to her right, she noticed Bianca had slipped away unnoticed, leaving her completely and utterly alone with one Trixie Mattel. Fuck. Again.

“Come get a drink with me!” Trixie insisted. She might not have been entirely comfortable alone with her crush, but tagging along was a significantly better option than hiding in a corner. The two pushed their way towards the booze. Trixie filled a red solo cup for Katya before grabbing one for herself and maneuvering them over to the poolside loveseat.

Katya’s drink felt awkward clutched in her hands. She knew that most highschoolers had experience with alcohol, but it was different watching her peers getting trashed. What’s the point? Katya wondered.

“That’s gonna get warm, you know?” Trixie snapped Katya out of her thoughts.

Katya gave her a sheepish smile, “I don’t really drink. Like at all. I just took it so you didn’t think I was lame.”

“Oh, honey,” Trixie began softly, “I would never judge you for something like that. Here, let me take that.” She made a grab for Katya’s cup, but Katya pulled it away.

“One sec!” Katya stuck two fingers of her free hand right into her beer and pulled them out. She saw the confusion on Trixie’s face and gave her a mischievous look. Katya took her beer fingers and wiped the alcohol across the pulse points on her neck. Playing it safe, she repeated the action until all the places she’d usual spray with perfume were sticky with beer. She was sure she smelled like a distillery. Perfect. Once again, Trixie made a grab for the cub, but another hand beat her to it. Alaska Honard in all her glory snatched it from Katya and drained its contents.

“Thanksss, Kati,” Alaska slurred. “Jus’ needed a lil’ liquid courage before I go on.” She swooped down to give Katya a sloppy kiss on the cheek. Alaska was sloshed. Her makeup was smudged she was swaying on her feet, and she smelled worse than Katya, who had just taken a bath in her beer.

“Go on what, Alaska?” Needless to say, Katya was a bit concerned. Because the two had done most of the work for their partner scene the previous class, Alaska and Katya were able to spend the day’s 3rd period chatting away. The demure girl from earlier was nowhere to be found. She was beginning to wonder if her friend had even processed her question when Alaska finally responded.

“‘M gonna be a star, Kati,” Alaska giggled. “Britney, bitch!” She then proceeded to fist up the fabric at the bottom of her dress and try to pull her black bodycon sequin gown up and over her body. Katya could only watch as she writhed around and made pitiful whining noises in her attempt to undress. “Off!” Alaska pouted, giving Katya her best puppy dog eyes.

Katya shared a look with Trixie before standing up and carefully spinning the blonde around. Her small hands were perfect for pulling down tiny zippers, and the dress slid down Alaska’s lithe body and pooled at her feet. Katya’s throat went dry.

Underneath her dress, Alaska wore a lacy, black strapless bra and a matching set of panties. Katya could not handle it. She didn’t mean to stare, but she couldn’t bring herself to look away. Soft, pale, flawless, Katya took in the beauty in front of her. Talk about body-ody-ody. Alaska was toned with the supple legs of a dancer—unfortunately, she lacked a dancer’s poise. Katya’s aneurism was cut short when the cheerleader stumbled trying to get out of the offending garment.

“Geez, Alaska,” Katya exclaimed, “Would you be more careful?”

“I may not be graceful…” Alaska trailed off, beginning to sway on her feet.

“I need my Lasky!” Detox shouted from the edge of the pool. Alaska visibly perked at her nickname and gave Katya a sloppy goodbye kiss on the cheek before teetering off towards Detox and Roy.

What the fuck? Katya raised her eyebrows. She turned to Trixie in search of an answer as to what just happened, but all the blonde had to offer was a shrug. Katya looked back to Rolaskatox and noticed a few pertinent details she’d missed in her first glance: Roxy and Detox were also in their skivvies, three chairs were now in a row on the bridge that separated the two halves of the pool, and the music had stopped.

Katya tried to do the math in her head: liquid courage + 3 scantily clad girls x 1 chair - Kendrick Lamar = ???? She had to be missing something. “‘I’m gonna be a star,’” Alaska had said…Fame = liquid courage + 3 scantily clad girls x 1 chair - Kendrick Lamar. Katya’s brows knit together. Some kind of performance? And then it hit her. “‘Britney, bitch,’”…They’re performing a Britney Spears number practically naked. Obviously the ideal way to spend a Friday night. Katya could think of no other explanation for the weird happenings of the last few minutes, but the answer she’d arrived at wasn’t any less of an acid trip.

The three girls took their places behind the chairs, and Roxy, who had at some point manifested a microphone, gave pearl a thumbs up.

“Where my party people at?” Roxy shouted into the microphone. Praise Putin for Pearl because the feedback on the mic might have made their ears bleed. The crowd around the pool hooted and hollered. Yuck, Katya gagged on the high school movie realness. “We’ve got a special treat for you tonight! Our little Lasky here,” Roxy pushed Alaska forward, “Didn’t think that she was going to make the varsity cheer team.” Alaska flushed at her friends divulgence and squirmed in her grip. Naturally, Roxy paid no attention to her friend’s discomfort, “So Toxy and I, we made a bet: if Lasky didn’t make varsity we’d have a Golden Girls marathon, but if she did…she’d have to show off her sweet moves at the Back-to-School Bash!”

“Hit it, Pearl!” Detox shouted. Roxy tossed the microphone to someone near the end of the walk, and the three girls took their places by their chairs. Alaska was clearly less thrilled about the performance than she was when she had been talking to Katya minutes ago. Liquid courage? No dice. The instrumental intro into Britney Spears’ “Toxic” began to play from the outdoor speakers, and Alaska’s gyrated her hips mechanically to the beat.

Baby, can’t you see

I’m calling

A guy like you should wear a warning

It’s dangerous, I’m falling

Katya was dumbfounded. Mouth agape, she wondered, Does this shit happen at all high school parties? Mother, I swear I’m sober. She hadn’t had anything to drink, so she couldn’t have been drugged or anything crazy like that. This was, in fact, happening. And Katya had thought she was fucking mental. A glance to her side told her that she wasn’t the only one questioning her sanity; Trixie’s eyes were bulging out of their sockets.

There’s no escape

I can’t wait

I need a hit, Baby, give me it

You’re dangerous, I’m lovin’ it

Dangerous. There was something sinister about the atmospheric red that bathed the trio and spilled into the audience. Her hands began to tremble. Brenda, not now, she willed herself to calm down.

Too high

Can’t come down

Losin’ my head, spinnin’ ‘round and 'round

Do you feel me now?

It wasn’t just her shaking, though. Alaska’s body was vibrating with tension—not ‘loving it’. Her sisters in scandal moved a lot smoother than she did, and she was concentrating hard on keeping herself from falling off of her chair. How much “‘liquid courage’” did this bitch have? The trio had gotten up on their chairs at the beginning of the chorus and were doing what looked like Christina Aguilera choreography circa Genie in a Bottle. Katya wouldn’t be surprised if Rotox had actually gotten the wrong blonde when choreographing. Katya frowned, Alaska, please don’t crack your head open.

With a taste of your lips I’m on a ride

You’re toxic I’m slippin’ under

With a taste of a poison paradise

I’m addicted to you

Don’t you know that you’re toxic?

And I love what you do

Don’t you know that you’re toxic?

She regained her breath when the chair acrobatics were finally over. The dance routine had evolved into what could probably qualify as softcore porn. Roxy, Alaska, and Detox were writhing on the platform in an obscene manner. Katya thought they looked like cats in heat. Alcoholic cats in heat. Which was actually quite a shame because real alcoholic cats in heat were something that Katya would totally like to see.

It’s getting late to give you up

I took a sip from my devil’s cup

Slowly, it’s taking over me

Too high, can’t come down

It’s in the air and it’s all around

Can you feel me now?

Britney Spears you are a cruel bitch, Katya chewed her lower lip. She was trying her hardest not to feel anything.

With a taste of your lips, I’m on a ride

You’re toxic, I’m slippin’ under

With a taste of a poison paradise

I’m addicted to you

Don’t you know that you’re toxic?

And I love what you do

Don’t you know that you’re toxic?

Don’t you know that you’re toxic?

If she weren’t so put off by the course the night had taken and concerned for her friend, she might have been more than a little turned on. There was no denying that Alaska was attractive—even as she flopped about like a fish on a marble platter—but her mother raised her right. We do not objectify women, and we definitely do not allow others to take advantage of inebriated ones.

Taste of your lips, I’m on a ride

You’re toxic, I’m slippin’ under

With a taste of a poison paradise

I’m addicted to you

Don’t you know that you’re toxic?

With a taste of your lips, I’m on a ride

You’re toxic, I’m slippin’ under

With a taste of a poison paradise

I’m addicted to you

Don’t you know that you’re toxic?

Katya had to admit she was impressed. There really was no better way to draw attention to yourself than repeatedly slamming your pussy into the makeshift stage. It certainly seemed to be working now; she might just have to try it sometime.

Intoxicate me now

With your lovin’ now

I think I’m ready now

I think I’m ready now

Intoxicate me now

With your lovin’ now

I think I’m ready now

Roxy, Alaska, and Detox all struck their final poses. Katya could see their chests heaving wildly as they held for the raucous applause of the party guests standing poolside. It was certainly strange, but she couldn’t knock their performance. Kids would be kids, right? She was about to chalk it all up to a bit of harmless fun, after all, when tweedle dumb and tweedle dumber broke formation and pushed Alaska straight off of the platform. Suddenly, the tall blonde was in the water, limbs thrashing about in response to the sudden change in environment.

“Pool party!” Willam shouted, stripping off her own dress. Leave it to Willam to make a splash. Literally. For some reason the most inebriated of the guests decided that it was a fantastic idea to accidentally drown themselves instead of their sorrows. Soon, the pool was full of bodies and she could no longer keep track of her friend.

Alaska finally scampered to the steps with the stability of a newborn fawn. She all but fell out of the pool and took half of the water with her. Alaska’s mascara streaked down her cheeks, and her hair hung limp and matted. Roxy and Detox were nowhere to be found—either to help her clean up or to read her for filth. Coco Montrese and her longtime frenemy Miss Alyssa Edwards, however, were more than happy to fill in.

They sound like those brain dead hyenas from The Lion King, Katya snickered to herself. Maybe not that lady one, though. That bitch was fierce.

Alaska coughed up a mouthful of water right at their feet. “Hey, Coco,” She began, “Your makeup is terrible.” Coco wasn’t laughing anymore. Point Alaska.

“Have you seen yourself, mama?” Coco fired back, The blonde rolled her eyes and snatched the drink in Coco’s hand. Alaska tossed it back all in one go.

“Thanks,” Alaska drawled, tossing the empty cup back and wrapping herself in the first available towel.

Katya turned to Trixie with a question on her lips. “Does this happen often?” She asked. Trixie gave a low whistle.

“Pearl has dragged me to a lot of weird shit, but I think this might just be a first,” Trixie answered with gusto. She checked her watch, “And it’s not even 10:00! The night is still young, honey!”

Right, Katya thought, the night is still young. Just great.

Trixie soon ditched Katya for Pearl—something about the stupid pumpkin carriage coming to steal her friend after midnight—and Katya hadn’t known Trixie long enough to reasonably protest the abandonment. She hoped Bianca was somewhere inside the house.

There were still people in the living room, but it looked like the horny gremlins from earlier had finally gotten a room. Literally. Unfortunately, the cheerleaders that had taken their place were not much better. Head bitch Violet Chachki had her legs draped over one of the arms of a stately armchair in a carefree yet superior manner. Why anyone would want to be queen of the hot messes? Katya couldn’t tell you. But apparently power—or at least the perception of power—gave one Violet Chachki a raging hard on. Gag.

Bianca wasn’t in the room, but the blonde was determined to see her valiant quest through. Hopefully, she’d stumble upon a nunnery with some sexy ladies along the way. Sneaking past the wicked bitch of the west and her flying monkeys, she regrouped in the kitchen. Katya went down her mental checklist: Keys? Check. Assorted limbs? Check. Clothes? Check. Inhibitions? Check. Virtue? Debauched. Sanity? Remaining hopefully optimistic. Bianca? Still M.I.A. The kitchen was empty due to the commotion happening poolside. Chips crunched under the soles of Katya’s sneakers. That was another reason she didn’t enjoy being out in the general public for extended periods of time: bitches be nasty.

The second floor was significantly cleaner than the first. An entire floor of the Honards’ house was dedicated to entertainment. Katya knew that Alaska had an older sister, Nebraska, but she couldn’t fathom why any child—or two children for that matter—needed an entire floor to play. How could the rooms not feel so…empty? Katya wondered, shuddering involuntarily. The blonde couldn’t picture Alaska spending much time up here now. She felt as though she was looking at an abandoned playground and couldn’t help but think it made Alaska sad, too.

After a few moments, it became clear to Katya that Bianca wasn’t there, but she continued to linger on the landing. Her blue eyes were drawn to the set of stairs that would take her to the third floor. It was an idea for the pantheon of bad ideas; she was tempted nonetheless. Katya could hear her grandfather’s words in her head: ‘Curiosity killed the kitty, лисичка,’ What her Deda didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him. Besides, I’m not that kind of pussy, am I? She justified.

Katya crept up to the dark third story of the house with the innocence of an intruder—she’d plead the fifth if necessary. The second door down from the landing was ominously open. Honestly, there may as well have been a big red arrow pointing towards the room because Katya’s feet were already carrying her towards it. Darkness engulfed the room, itself, save for a rectangle of warm light.

“Jinkxy, is that you?” Alaska groaned, presumably from the same direction as the light. “Jus’ leave the dress on the bed. Save the lecture for the morning.”

Katya cleared her throat, “Alaska? It’s Katya. Can I come in?” She received a grunt in response. The blonde followed the sound into what turned out to be Alaska’s master bathroom. Her friend was curled up against her marble tub with a beach towel wrapped around her.

“How was I, Kati?“ Alaska drawled.

Katya took a seat in front of her and pulled her legs to her chest. She thought for a moment before speaking, “80% sexy, 20% disgusting…like me.” Alaska whined. “Why are you still in your wet clothes?” She asked. Her friend shrugged. Right, Katya sighed. Alaska was half asleep; this wasn’t going to be a one woman job. Thankfully, Jinkx appeared moments later with her heels in one hand and Alaska’s little black dress in the other. Katya raised her hands in surrender. “I swear she was like this when I found her,” she blurted.

“This isn’t even the worst of it,” Jinx spoke candidly. She tossed her shoes onto the floor and pulled up her long, red hair. “I’ll wrangle the monkey if you go and find her some dry underwear and something to wear to bed.” Jinkx’s tone left no room for questioning.

Mother, I never thought I’d be a panty snatcher, much less an invited one, Katya made a face. Alaska’s dressers were easy to find, and she felt undeniably dirty as she began her game of panty roulette. Pulling open the first drawer, Katya sprang back, ready to strike. Assorted pajamas were hardly a foe, and she vanquished them swiftly. Rebel athleticwear laid in wait behind drawer number two. They, too, were no match for her feet of fury, Katya kicked the drawer shut with a battle cry.

“Katya, what the hell are you doing out there?” Jinkx called.

Katya had the dignity to look sheepish. “Nothing!” She shouted back. “Be there in a second!” The underwear turned out to be in the next drawer down. She thrust a hand inside without looking and tightened her grip on the first piece of fabric her hand found. Her feeling of triumph only lasted the few seconds it took for her to realize what she’d managed to retrieve: a lacy black teddy. Katya dropped the offending garment as if she’d been burned. I am going to hell, she shook her head, Straight to hell. I will not pass go, nor will I collect $100…Deuces never loses, right? The scarlet thong she fished out next begged to differ. Her face was almost as red as the fabric, itself, when she flung it across the room. Fortunately, the third time was the charm. The pastel pink boyshorts seemed like a more appropriate item to put on a drunk girl, so Katya returned to the bathroom to present her nightwear bounty to Jinkx.

The motherly redhead, unsurprisingly, was not impressed. Jinkx arched a brow expectantly.

“You see,” Katya began, “I wasn’t comfortable—I didn’t um feel right digging through her things without, you know, her permission?” She swallowed thickly. “So I thought maybe it would be less creepy if I just reached in and grabbed the first thing I touched. Well, you see, Alaska’s got such a wide range of tastes, and it-uh…It took a hot second to find something appropriate…for the…occasion?” She was expecting to find disgust when she raised her eyes to meet Jinkx’s, but the redhead cackled loudly instead.

“Lemme guess, you saw something you didn’t want to see?” Jinkx chortled. Katya managed a weak nod. “I’m sorry, doll, I forget that not everyone is as acquainted with Miss Honard’s unmentionables as little ol’ me.”

Not everyone is as acquain—Oh! Blue eyes threatened to burst from their sockets as Katya processed her words.  

“Oh, for heaven’s sake, not like that,” Jinkx exclaimed, reading the thoughts reflected on Katya’s face. “Lasky and I did community theater together. I’ve known her since the first grade. Drunk proof her nightstand for me? I’ll dress blondie over here.”

“Does this happen often?” Katya asked Jinkx after Alaska’s door was closed. The incapacitated cheerleader was finally sound asleep in her bed, and the two girls didn’t think she’d be up anytime soon.

Jinkx sighed sadly, “It didn’t use to. Roxy and Detox are more toxic than Drano, and there’s no one to stop her from going out with them. Look, Lasky’s a sweet girl. A good, smart girl. But she makes bad choices sometimes, and there’s nothing that I—that we—can do about it. She’s gotta be the one to say enough is enough.”

Katya understood. Katya understood more than she wanted to. She’d been a shell of a girl drowning in the voices in her head not too long ago. It didn’t matter how many hands reached out to her if she refused to take them. Alaska—happy and hopeful Alaska—might just be drowning, too. Katya wondered if she drank to impress, to keep up, or to forget.

Jinkx promised that she’d look over Alaska until the next morning, so Katya reluctantly chose to rejoin the land of the living downstairs. The first floor was significantly louder than it was when she left it. Games of flip cup and beer pong had picked up in the dining room, and Violet’s flock had not only grown, but had grown to include both Trixie and Bianca, who were trying their hardest not to laugh at the spectacle in the middle of the living area. Willam and Courtney were having a major bitchfest for all to see. Normally, Katya would run for the hills, but if Bianca and Trixie weren’t afraid of getting caught in the crossfire, she figured it was safe enough to stick around and tuned into the conversation.

“Your tone seems really pointed right now,” Willam pursed her lips. She was clearly the calmer of the two, as Courtney was beet red and positively radiating tension. Katya could tell Willam’s nonchalance was only winding the Australian up more.

Courtney folded her arms defensively. “Well, I’m sorry you think that, Willam,” she took a deep breath. “I feel like everything I say kinda comes from the heart, and I’m truly hurt that you threw yourself at Daniel when you knew how I felt about him.”

“Sorry ‘bout it,” Willam scoffed, picking at her nails. Her words reflected everything but the sentiment they were meant to.

Katya knew that Willam was a bitch, but this was a little much even for her. Willam and Courtney had been best friends since Courtney moved from Australia the summer of their freshman year; it was hard to believe that Willam would throw their relationship away. Katya held her breath. Everyone in the wings was uncomfortable during the pregnant pause. The scene before her was straight out of a 90s teen movie, and she didn’t have the popcorn to go with it.

All movement stilled when Willam finally looked up. “I tend to think emotions are for ugly people,” she deadpanned. The room let out a collective gasp. Courtney was across the room in a flash, and her palm made contact with Willam’s cheek. It would be logical to assume that Willam, who was just slapped across the face by her best friend, would be the most in shock at the sudden turn of events; it would also be the wrong conclusion. Courtney’s features were frozen in fear. The offending hand still hovered in the air, trembling like a leaf.

Willam was the first to react—and in a very uncharacteristic way. She engulfed the smaller girl in a tender hug. Courtney began to sob muffled apologies into her neck, and despite her obvious desire to recoil, Willam continued to hold her close.

Maybe Willam actually does have feelings, Katya’s eyebrows raised. The sight of Willam whispering words of reassurance into Courtney’s ear was enough to make even the coldest heart melt. Well, the coldest heart with the exception of Violet Chachki’s. Katya was pretty sure the stick up her ass was a permanent installment.

When the two pulled apart minutes later with smiles on their faces, they were met with a round of applause. Courtney wiped at her eyes, careful not to smudge her makeup. If she noticed Willam’s arm around her waist, she didn’t give any indication as she addressed the spectators that had gathered, “Well, I’m gonna need to be less sober before I spill any more about myself. Truth or drink, anyone?”

Truth or drink? No thanks, Katya turned to sneak out. Unfortunately, Bianca had also chosen that exact moment to glance in her direction, and Katya was caught in the act.

“Bitch, you can’t leave yet. It’s not even midnight!” Bianca half whispered, half hissed.

And Bianca doesn’t associate with losers, Katya reminded herself. Don’t be a loser. “If my locker gets filled with worms next week, I will personally marinate you like a chicken,” she promised her friend.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah, I’ve heard it all before. Blame it on Bianca Del Rio. Take a number, sweetheart, you’re holding up the line,” Bianca patted the space next to her on the floor.

Laganja had batted her eyelashes—and used her mouth—to coerce one of the mindless jocks to bring in one of the kegs from outside for their “slumber party secret sesh”. There were fifteen girls, including Katya, who stuck around for the potentially risky game, and Katya wasn’t thrilled to be playing with most of them. Adore finished off her beer and placed the empty bottle in the center of the circle.

“Party!” Adore shouted before giving the bottle a good spin. Around, and around, and around it went before coming to a stop at Coco’s feet. “Miss Coco Montrese, truth or dare?” She asked.

“I’ll pick truth, mama,” Coco answered.

Adore thought for a moment before speaking, “Are you afraid that you’ll always be the runner up?” There was a chorus of oohs. Everyone knew that the race for junior varsity squad captain their sophomore year was a sore spot for both girls. It was no secret that Alyssa was originally chosen to be captain by her teammates. However, when she became implicated in a cheating scandal, Coach Calhoun was forced to denounce her and give Coco, Alyssa’s best friend and the candidate to receive the second most votes, the position. To make matters worse, it was rumored that Coco was the one who suggested that Alyssa had committed academic dishonesty in the first place. Alyssa and Coco had patched up their friendship over the course of the last year, but there was no telling whether or not the structure would hold if tested.

“Out of respect for me and Miss Alyssa, I am going to drink,” Coco responded without hesitance. Adore poured her a shot, and Alyssa gave her hand a grateful squeeze as she tossed it back. “Ain’t no use bringing up what’s past.”

Coco spun the bottle next, and it chose Trixie as its victim. “Truth or dare?” Coco asked.

“I think I’ll pick dare?” Trixie responded with hesitance. Katya didn’t know much about Coco Montrese, but for Trixie’s sake she hoped Coco was one of the nice ones.

Said cheerleader gave Trixie a small and genuine smile, “Okay, mama, I dare you to let Miss Pearl over here do your makeup. Something has got to be done because you aren’t doing a pretty girl like yourself any favors.” The reactions to Coco’s dare for Trixie were mixed. Some of the she-demons tried and failed to hide their amused laughs, Pearl’s eyes opened fully, Violet’s grip on her chair tightened, and Trixie seemed to be not entirely opposed to the idea.

“Pearlie girl,” Trixie began, standing up and crossing to her best friend on the opposite side of the circle, “Treat my face like a princess and then fuck it like a slut.” The life-sized Barbie batted her eyelashes animatedly, earning her a laugh from pearl and a glare from Violet. The ice queen’s elevated irritability prompted Katya to reconsider her previous assessments—maybe it was an entire branch up her ass.

When Pearl and Trixie left, there was a void that seemed to swallow Violet whole. The physical space around her remained largely unchanged, but Katya could feel the emptiness that moved to fill the space Pearl left. And for the first time it occurred to her that Violet Chachki might be alone. I guess there might be some truth to the saying, she mused. After all, if you’re at the top, how can anyone else be? When you stripped away the glitter, the makeup, the clothes, you were left with a girl—albeit an arrogant, entitled, straight up cunt—plain and simple.

“Heavy is the head that wears the crown, huh?” Bianca nudged Katya’s arm, snapping her out of her thoughts.

“What?” Katya asked. Had she missed something while she was contemplating the character of Violet Chachki?

Bianca chuckled, “You’ve been staring at Chachki since Trixie and Pearl left.” The blonde feigned innocence. “You know how I feel about that 48 Hours show, Zamo. Share with the class before your peanut brain short circuits.”

“What’s her problem?” Katya whispered. “I mean, aside from her general disdain for anything that has a pulse and moves.”

“With Trixie?” Bianca confirmed. Katya nodded. “Oh, this is old news. Her Royal Hardass doesn’t share, but Sleeping Beauty’s got a soft spot for one Trixie Mattel.”

The dots aligned in Katya’s head once again. “Violet’s the pumpkin carriage!” She whisper-shouted.

“Bitch, that was not English,” Bianca snarked, “You been hanging around with Jose Cuervo?”

Katya rolled her eyes at her friend’s question, “I have ninety-nine problems, and substance abuse won’t be one of them if I have anything to say about it.” She turned back to the circle just in time to see the neck of the bottle stop on Bianca, who didn’t even flinch. Katya was secretly proud; her friend had bigger balls than most of the ‘macho men’ at the party—this was going to be interesting. Since Trixie had gone upstairs to get her face redone, Detox decided that she would be the brave volunteer to issue the next truth or dare.

“Bianca, truth or dare?” Detox asked smugly. Katya couldn’t guess which one would be worse. Unsurprisingly, Bianca chose dare. “I dare you to ask Max for his number.” There was, again, a chorus of oohs, and it was Bianca’s turn to roll her eyes.

“Really, bitch?” Bianca asked. She stood up and righted her denim shorts before striding over to the meatheads playing beer pong with a clear purpose and her head held high.

Because Bianca could run with the boys, no one batted an eye—unless she wanted them to. She hoisted herself up onto the pool table in front of Max and held out an upturned palm. They were too far away to make out their conversation, and Katya was a terrible lip reader at best, but she could picture how the exchange would go down:

“Gimme ya’ numbah, beefstick,” She imitated Bianca in her head. The 1920s gangster voice was a bold choice, but she wasn’t going to mock it just yet.

“D’uhh…okay,” Fake Max droned.

The blonde chuckled to herself as the real Max stuck a fist in the pockets of his jeans and fished around. Finally, he produced what looked like a wadded up gum wrapper and snagged a pen from his pal, presumably jotting down his number. Bianca hastily took the offering and sashayed back to the group of girls. She dropped the wrapper in Detox’s lap before taking her seat by Katya.

While the hens squawked over her success, Bianca leaned over to Katya and whispered, “Never let a bitch see you sweat.” Katya had so many questions, but she wouldn’t be able to ask them until later. It was Bianca’s turn to spin the bottle, and Adore, unsurprisingly, chose truth when landed on.

“Adore, which girl on the squad is the skunkiest?” Bianca waggled her thick, black brows. Because she was the mascot and didn’t change in the locker room, she genuinely had no idea how rank the girls smelled after practice or a game. Sue her; she was curious. What Bianca also didn’t know was that the question had a definitive answer, and that answer would do damage far beyond her intent to poke a little harmless and innocent fun at one of the girls.

Even completely sloshed, Adore recognized the gravity of the question. “Fuck! If I drink any more, I’m gonna be sick,” Adore groaned. Her teammates looked at her with pity in their eyes.

“Yeah but it’s not like anyone’s ever died from drinking too much!” Laganja came to her rescue, topping off her cup, “What’s one more?” Adore could only offer her a weak smile.

“Uh, I think I’m just gonna spin the thing now…For everyone’s sake,” Adore informed the group. The bottle landed on Gia, and she picked dare.

The turns only seemed to bleed together as time went on. After Gia drank from the toilet, Roxy refused to reveal her weight. Laganja told her dad she was eloping in Vegas, and when she spun the bottle it landed on Violet. Because ladies don’t kiss and tell, the brunette tossed one back instead of revealing the number of sexual partners she’s had. Alyssa confessed that she was afraid she would never achieve her dream of owning her own dance studio. Courtney shared that she’d never been in love, and Willam exposed her entire browser history, telling Katya a lot more than she wanted to know about the girl. For obvious reasons, Joslyn refused to eat a raw egg. Detox followed by removing Adore’s socks with her teeth. Katya played it safe and suggested that Bianca would be a bad date because she’s insulting people all the time before daring Gia to reveal any childhood nickname she had. Things didn’t start going downhill until the bottle landed on Violet a second time.

“Violet,” Gia cooed, “Truth or dare?”.

“Truth,” Violet answered with an unreadable expression.

Gia thought for a moment before asking the first truly problematic question of the night, “Who in this room do you like the least?”

Ruh-roh, Katya winced.

Violet didn’t waste a moment before answering, “Willam.” There was a collective gasp across the room. Willam, on her part, didn’t seem to be phased in the slightest. Then again, you could never really read Willam Belli.

Pearl and Trixie returned, arm in arm, before Violet could spin the bottle. Katya’s jaw—along with all the other girls’—dropped. Trixie looked gorgeous. Pearl reclaimed her seat next to Violet, much to the cheerleader’s delight, but brought Trixie with her. At the group’s insistence, Trixie was allowed to take the turn that she missed, and Detox was dared to call a random number in her phone and deliver the worst pickup line she could think of. Katya was glad for the change in the room’s atmosphere after Violet’s confession until Detox took her turn. After the call, Detox dared Violet to spend the next hour trapped in a bathroom with another girl from the circle chosen at random. Anyone who didn’t know Detox might think she was trying to create a seven minutes in heaven type deal, but even Katya could pick up on her intent to stir up trouble. She pitied the poor soul who ended up stuck in there.

Of course that poor soul ended up being her, and she wasn’t about to pussy out in front of the most popular girls in school. Peer pressure was a bitch. Judge, jury, and executioner had all decided it was her time, and she accepted that; she just wished her death march had a better soundtrack. Katya would be cooped up in one of the Honards’ bathrooms with a less than pleasant—soon to be considerably more less than pleasant—Violet Chachki. She was going to punch Detox in her stupid mouth.

Katya entered the bathroom the same way she’d rip off a band-aid: quickly and without much thought for the immediate consequences. Violet, who was perched on the bathroom counter, had been engrossed in her phone when the door swung open to reveal the one girl that she just couldn’t seem to get away from. Unsurprisingly, the cheerleader wasn’t thrilled.

“Really, bitch?” Violet griped, giving Katya a once over. It wasn’t like the situation was ideal for either of them.

Katya put her hands on her hips, “You know what you can suck? My whole dick.” She unenthusiastically plunked herself down against the wall opposite of the door. “We’ve got two options, Chachki, we can either suck it up and spend the next hour in here in silence, or we can French a little.” Violet was aghast at her words. If Katya were a proper woman, she might have been able to hold in the cackling fit prompted by the girl’s scandalized reaction. Violet wasn’t impressed with her wheezing, either. Katya finally calmed down and attempted to explain herself, “Sorry, I could have been more clear, but your reaction was priceless.” She wiped at her eyes. “Thanks. I needed that. Detox said she was “‘feeling generous,’”  and if we so choose, we can suck face and then get the hell out of Dodge.” Violet sneered, and Katya wondered if it was with anger or disgust; she didn’t know which one was better.

“As fucking if,” Violet scoffed, clearly feeling as though Detox’s so-called coup de grâce was more of a personal attack.

“Well, I don’t see anyone lining up to get the kiss of the spider woman, either,” Katya observed. “I told you that you weren’t going to like it.” The cheerleader exhaled sharply, and she was surprised not to see steam come out of her flared nostrils.

Violet pursed her lips, “Just shut up and stay on your side of the room.” With that, Violet returned her attention to her phone, but Katya didn’t fail to notice that her expression didn’t soften. If Katya weren’t trapped in the room with her, she’d probably find Violet’s situation hilarious.

Katya had made the mistake of leaving her jacket—and consequentially, her phone—on the coat rack in the hall. Call her old fashioned, but it was a force of habit. Besides, she didn’t need her phone because Bianca was supposed to be there to pull her out of trouble if it arose. But are we really surprised to find ourselves here? Katya asked herself. No. Not at all. At least she found herself entertaining. Hoping to bring forth inspiration, she laid back on the floor, let her gaze unfocus, and tried to lose herself in the plain ceiling. Katya didn’t know how long she’d been drifting for when Violet’s voice shattered the silence.

“Fuck!” Violet cursed, and the sound of hard plastic hitting the floor made Katya’s whole body go rigid. She squeezed her eyes shut. I am not going to be equipped to handle this, Katya bristled. Maybe if I just keep my eyes closed, I can fall asleep. It seemed like a feasible plan until she heard the first sniffle. Of course I find out she has feelings when I’m stuck in a room with her, the blonde facepalmed inwardly. Why today, of all days, to be railed in the ass by life? Her left eye opened first, searching for any signs of danger before being followed by her right eye.

“I knew you didn’t like me Chachki, but I didn’t think you found me this repulsive,” Katya spoke. “Quite frankly, it’s offensive.”

“Fuck you,” Violet spat, but the usual venom in her voice was gone. Katya propped herself back up against the wall to get a better look at the girl on the counter. Her attention was unwanted, and Violet turned towards the door with a huff.

Clearly comedic relief wasn’t the answer. “Do you wanna talk about it?” Katya tried again. No response. The girl’s side profile was growing red and blotchy, and Katya had sent her mom enough photos of her crying to know that Violet was trying and failing to stifle an emotional response. Go figure. “I won’t tell anyone if you cry, you know?” She said softly. “Bottling it up is just gonna make you feel shittier than you do now.”

“Do you think I’m a goddamn idiot?” Violet barked. She wiped furiously at her eyes before whirling around in an attempt to intimidate the blonde. “Better make your fifteen minutes last.”

Katya was genuinely taken aback. Does this bitch really think I’m in on this? She shook her head incredulously. Her airhead friends would literally eat me alive, and I’m pretty sure I haven’t given her any reason to think that I’m faker than Malibu Barbie. If I were made of plastic, why in the hell would I keep my hands this small? “Are we really back on this bullshit, Violet?” Katya snapped. “I’m sorry you think that the universe revolves around you. I hate to burst your bubble, but I have better things to do than conspire against you with your teammates over scones. Get over yourself, Princess.” In her head, Katya blew the smoke from the pistols in her hands. Call me perestroika, Mother, for I am reforming problematic practices, she hooted.

“Whatever,” Violet grumbled. Katya, on the other hand, wasn’t willing to let this go; some conversation was better than nothing.

“How’s the back?” The blonde inquired and was pleasantly surprised when Violet outright snorted at the shift in conversation. Katya took her in as she threw her head back in laughter. There was something about this Violet—the unguarded and natural Violet—that captivated her. Violet’s eyes crinkled, and she clasped a hand over her mouth in a flimsy attempt to stifle the noises she was making. It was frustratingly endearing.

Violet cleared her throat before answering, “Fucked. I’m considering outlawing acrylics on the squad. That shit’s not even practical for a cheerleader, and it’s hurting like a bitch to corset.”

“You’re wearing a corset?” Katya gasped. For the first time that night, she took all of Violet in. She wore a nude illusion dress with a loose black lattice pattern. It covered just a little more than her ass and was cinched at the waist with a rocker belt, squeezing her in a way that left absolutely nothing to the imagination. How in the world do you hide a corset under that? Katya wondered. In addition to the dress, she donned thigh high, slick black boots and a thick, black leather choker that looked more like a collar. Hot damn, Katya could n e v e r, and she knew it. She finally composed herself, “First of all, you’re literally a cheerleader with a body to die for. Second of all, why wear something that hurts you?”

The cheerleader didn’t even seem phased by the inquiries, almost like she’d dealt with them hundreds of times before, “Pain is beauty, and I’m the prettiest.” Katya couldn’t argue there. Violet was beautiful, but she still thought her ideology was questionable.

“So what actually happened at the pep rally? We all saw you fall, but I’ll believe it was your fault when the garden is full of ducks holding pastry in their hands. You’re too much of a hardass.”

Violet raised her eyebrows, as if daring Katya to say it again, “I will let that slide only because it’s technically a compliment. And you’d be correct; I am a professional, unlike others. You’d do well to take note: one of my biggest pet peeves is when people don’t take the things I love as seriously as I do. I accept nothing less than perfection.”

“That must be lonely,” Katya couldn’t stop the words from spilling from her mouth. “You know, having such high standards? Does anyone ever make the cut?” Opening her mouth was clearly a mistake because Violet seemed to shut down all at once.

“What do you know about how I feel?” Violet fired back, crossing her arms over her chest.

Keep digging yourself deeper, why don’t ya? Katya shook her head. She needed to tread carefully. It was a miracle that she had even been having a civil conversation with Violet in the first place, and she didn’t want to ruin the progress they had made. “I know that you work harder than anyone else on that squad, and nobody gives you credit or appreciates you for it,” Katya began. “I know that people are fast to discredit your talent because of how young you are. I know that you’re waiting for the day those bitches stop hoping that you’ll screw up or get hurt, the day you can finally stop looking over your shoulder, the day that you no longer have to prove yourself. I know that you’re tired of fighting tooth and nail for the respect that you’ll probably never earn, and I know it’s fucking hard for you to pretend that your peers aren’t harboring resentment towards you. I know that at night you try to wash it all away because you’re still holding out hope that it will all be worth it in the end. Cheer and theatre aren’t that different. It was obvious in the gym, and it’s obvious now.” Katya took a deep breath. Maybe she’d been thinking a little more about Violet that afternoon than she’d like to admit. She hadn’t meant to go off on a tangent like that, but she certainly didn’t regret what she said. Based on Violet’s reaction, however, maybe she should have. The brunette’s hands were clenched into tight fists at her sides, and tears began to roll down her cheeks. Katya tried to backtrack, “Violet I—”

Katya was cut off by the bathroom door swinging open. Pearl, who stood oblivious on the other side, immediately noticed the state of her friend. “Vi?” Pearl approached her hesitantly. Violet’s gaze didn’t move from the floor. “Hey, what’s going on? Talk to me.” She moved to lift Violet’s chin up, but Violet recoiled from her touch.

“Don’t touch me!” Violet shouted, her voice almost frantic. Katya’s eyes darted from one girl to the other. Pearl, who was visibly shocked by her reaction, looked hurt, which was very uncharacteristic for the mellow girl. Katya, herself, had never seen anything but characteristic nonchalance reflected on Pearl’s face, and the change made her uneasy.

Pearl took a reluctant step forward and spoke in a whisper, “Violet, did something happen? You know you can tell me anything.”

“Is that the truth, Pearl?” The brunette questioned. “Because clearly I don’t know you as well as I thought I did.”

Pearl shook her head in frustration. “Cut the crap, Vi,” She demanded, “You’re literally my best friend, and—”

“Bullshit!” Violet interrupted. “I call motherfucking bullshit!” Both girls were standing now with less than a foot between them, the situation escalating by the second, and Katya was stuck in the middle of it. She tried to push her back further into the solid wall behind her, but there was nowhere for her to go. Fuck me! Katya grimaced. Why is Toxic so damn appropriate right now?

“What the hell, Violet?” Pearl shouted back. “God, you’re fucking impossible.”

“Fuck you, Pearl!” Violet pushed Pearl, and the blonde hit the wall with a dull thud. “Fuck you! You and I are done! You hear me? Done! Save your goddamn lies for that pathetic dress up doll. I never want to see you again.” With a huff, Violet stormed out of the bathroom, leaving an uncomfortable Katya and a drained Pearl alone. What the fuck just happened? Katya tried and failed to process the encounter.

She was caught off guard when Pearl finally acknowledged her presence. “Forecast predicts drinking to forget,” Pearl deadpanned, nodding her head towards the door Violet had just stormed through. “Want in?” Katya shook her head furiously. Getting piss drunk with those two would be like making smalltalk with a Molotov cocktail. She’d pass. She’d pass hard. Pearl seemed to understand. “It’s flazéda or whatever,” The corners of her mouth turned up slightly. “Just do me a solid and remind me to fuck with Willam’s weed on Monday.”

Katya didn’t know what “‘flazéda’” meant, or the why and how of Pearl tampering with Willam’s weed, but the questions weren’t enough to persuade her to stick around the party longer. When Pearl left, Katya made a run for the Honards’ front door. She grabbed her jacket before taking off down the street. The blonde didn’t stop until she could no longer hear the music pulsing from the house. Her phone buzzed in her pocket with a text from ‘Bianca del Realest’:

Bitch, where are you?

What the fuck happened in there?

Earth to Yekaterina?

Katya sighed and pocketed the phone again. She’d call her when she got home. That would buy her some more time to put the experience into words…and to decide just how much information she should share.

The drive home from the Honards’ was quiet—too quiet. Music normally made being in the car enjoyable, but there was something about the night that didn’t allow Björk to keep her out of her own head. It didn’t feel real, and that terrified the shit out of her. Life was monotonous, life was mundane, life was one of those stupid time loop movies where you had to learn from your mistakes over time and find out what was important in the stupid haystack of chaos. Violet Chachki and her ex best friend potentially ex best friend were not supposed to have the Chernobyl of all relationship meltdowns in Alaska Honard’s guest bathroom right in front of her. Katya didn’t know who opened this tragic can of worms, but when she found them, she was going to slap a bitch silly.

[waternilly]

The End of an Era

Ship: Blackleg Sanji x f!OC Language: english Word count: 1.5k Warnings: none Ao3 link: here | Wattpad link: here Summary: Musicals! But what if this time the rivals were lovers in real life?

Many weeks and hours of hard work had come to their end. Tonight was the big finale of the musical Florence had built with both old and new friends over the semester. It hadn’t gone without troubles, but they had made it in the end.

As she waited between the wings on the side of the stage, the young woman let her mind drift off.

She thought back about the moment Mozart l’Opéra Rock had been announced as this year’s project. How all the students who would graduate in June shared the same excitement and thrill at the prospect.

She remembered the audition and how learning the lyrics to “Si Je Défaille” had been easy, being engraved in her memory ever since she was ten. She also remembered when she had to show up at the next audition to sing “Tatoue-Moi” on demand of her professor.

Florence had already performed as a male character in a previous project and she knew the professor’s demand was far from innocent. They had something in mind.

And she was right. The next week, once auditions for both singers, actors and dancers alike were over, the results were published.

1. Florence Moire ..... Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart

A smile had crept on her face instantly. But what made her even happier was the name just two lines under hers.

3. Sanji Vinsmoke ..... Antonio Salieri

Not only would she perform as the main character of what was probably her favourite musical. The one to act as her rival was her own boyfriend.

Images of her sweet Sanji in black hair and eyeshadow had immediately crossed her mind and she couldn’t wait to see it happen.

That evening, the entire crew had gone to a local student pub and celebrated all night long. Florence lost count of how many times she got congratulated or all the teasing her and Sanji had gotten for acting out rivals.

It was one of Flo’s favourite memories. Everything felt right. No pressure or stress related to the production, school or the internship yet. Only pleasure, joy, excitement.

Rehearsals had started the same week, beginning with a script reading. Songs from the original musical were played whenever they were reached throughout the session. A few voice cracks and poorly acted sentences were uttered, but they were laughed off.

Florence and all the singers then went through some coaching first. Even though they were all decent already, they were still merely amateurs. Some had gotten such lessons the previous years, but everyone welcomed the tips from the teacher with open arms.

While those were reaching their end, they simultaneously started rehearsing with the actors. Their friends had already started learning their lines and now it was time for them to do as well.

To help with that process, Florence would often play the entire musical as background noise while studying or working on anything, to Sanji’s greatest amusement.

He early on realized that the one he tenderly referred to as ‘princess’ was nervous about the pressure put upon her shoulders. He often reminded her that the professor wouldn’t have given her the part if they didn’t believe her to be capable of it. He also loved to add that she would make for a great Mozart and an amazing rival, which would often help her calm down, at least temporarily.

As the dates approached and the rehearsals became longer -every song being performed in their entirety, accompanied by the dancers- the pressure among the whole crew rose. People started worrying about costumes or set pieces not being finished on time, about black outs on stage, about wigs falling off or ladies tripping over their massive dresses.

All of these faded shortly after luckily and everything was done in due time. The final rehearsal in full costume and make up also reassured everyone about what they had created. Which meant, representations could start. But not without some last minute preparations.

Bonney was left with her bright pink hair despite the professor’s reclamations who feared she would steal the show. The young woman’s determination was stronger however and she refused to incline, making her the very first pink haired Constanz Weber.

Luffy, who interpreted everyone’s favourite comic relief, Rosenberg, got his hair coloured grey with sprays often used for Halloween. It was slicked back and his face was painted bright white with two outrageously red spots on the cheeks. All of it, topped off with pencil-drawn eyebrows and two fake moles.

Sanji agreed to changing his style for the occasion. He got his hair dyed in a dark brown and slicked it all back except for one rebellious lock. Needless to say he was a sight for sore eyes like this. But every evening, before the representation, the benevolent make up artists who were fellow students painted his eyes with black eyeshadow, crayon and eyeliner. Black lipstick had also been considered at some point but was eventually discarded. And aside from all of that, he also walked around with black painted nails for a week.

As for Florence, the main thing she had to do was get a haircut. Her pixie hair had grown out during the semester and it required some touch ups. She was the one who had the wildest, most natural hairdo. It only got comped and sprayed to create some extra volume, but nothing too perfect. Her eyes got the same treatment as her lover’s however, which they liked to point out.

And then it was time.

The premiere.

Everyone was nervous to their core while simultaneously trying to help their friends calm down. Singers and actors alike reunited back stage to warm up their voices, a loud buzzing sound filling the room. Dancers took that opportunity to stretch and prepare as well. The entire crew was in its own bubble, in symbiosis with each other. Any conflicts that might have existed before were forgotten for now.

“Are you nervous, my love?” Sanji had asked his girlfriend just before she had to walk on stage.

“Yes,” she admitted.

With a smile, he had said: “You’ll feel better once you’re up there.”

She thanked him with a smile.

“Maybe turn on your microphone before it’s too late though,” he had teased.

Florence agreed, flipped the switch and ran up on stage. Sanji had been right. Merely seconds later, as she was uttering her very first line, she was calm, confident, poised. Every movement, every sentence flowed naturally. She felt good, at home.

To everyone’s surprise, nothing went wrong during the entire first act, which their professor naturally pointed out backstage during the break. They also complimented everyone’s acting, singing and dancing, clearly ecstatic with the result.

Flo knew what would come next. Someone started playing music while another person shouted to turn off the lights. Everyone jumped around and loudly shouted in unison with the music. A few even climbed on the table in the middle of the room to dance on it in a silly way, making the whole crew laugh.

That little tradition remained during the entire week of run, lasting the entire entre act every time. A twenty minute break of partying halfway through the musical.

Except it was now time to walk back on stage for the last time.

A loud ominous music played and Florence stepped into the light.

She gave everything she had in her, jumping and running around on stage.

Sanji then walked up himself, followed by Bonney who gave her best vocal performance yet.

Before long though, they reached the end of the musical and with it, the famous “Vivre à en Crever” scene. The only time Flo got to sing with her boyfriend throughout the entire performance.

She started, careful to keep a steady and clear voice. Then Sanji joined in. And ultimately, they sang together.

It was always one of the most poignant parts of the show and Florence had lost count of how many times she had almost kissed Sanji during it, never giving in however. Until now, whoever didn’t know them personally couldn’t have guessed they were a couple.

But that was about to change as it was time to salute and Florence had an idea in mind.

Once everyone had bowed in their usual position, they all started singing the most famous song of the musical -”Tatoue moi”- to celebrate the final representation. Florence took advantage of the context to ask Bonney to switch places with her since she was traditionally between her and Sanji. Florence wondered if the audience would react and how if they were to. By now, majority of the public wasn’t even from their college.

She started by just tangling their fingers but soon enough they were smiling at each other while singing eye to eye. When they reached the end of the song, Florence stood on the tip of her toes and pecked Sanji’s lips. He only grinned down at her before kissing her back.

Audible gasps, soon followed by extra cheers, could be heard throughout the audience. The public’s reaction was even better than what Flo was hoping for. She imagined the surprise it could be to see two people you pictured as rivals during the past two hours suddenly kiss. It amused her as well.

It might have been her last performance with this great crew of people but Florence had no reason to be sad. They had all gone out with a bang; Ace, Kid, Bonney, Sanji, herself. That night wouldn’t be one of mourning the end of an era. It would be a night to celebrate what they had achieved.

A/N: Bit of a cheesy ending yes, but oh well ^^” Please let me know what you thought of it, I haven’t written 3rd person fanfics in English in literally so long! Also, yeah, OC! Long time since I last wrote one. Any comments are welcome ^^ Thank you very much for reading <3

[thewritewolf]

Four Times (and the Lucky One) Chapter 3: Setback

Attempt #3 - Is a torn sweater and a classic dinner/movies Adrien's key to success?

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

And so we arrive at the recreation of the scene that inspired this entire fic - this one, by @sweetsweetsweetie, in case you missed it the first time - as well as the midpoint of this short story. 

Enjoy!

Read on Ao3

Adrien sat at his desk, resting his head on his arms as he waited for class to begin. The chill of winter had set in and he was almost grateful for it since that meant that his face was pressed up against the warm softness of his sweater. It was becoming thin in places from how much he had been wearing and washing it lately. He could sympathise - with all these late fall photoshoots and various other activities his father had crammed into his schedule, he was feeling pretty threadbare too.

Marinette passed by and he flashed her a warm smile as she made her way to her seat. She even paused in her conversation with Alya to tell him good morning. Taking her spot behind him, she continued talking. Since he had nothing else to occupy him, Adrien listened in while his eyes fluttered shut.

“Hey girl, isn't that charity thing you're in charge of coming up in a few weeks?"

"Yeah…” Marinette tapped at her desk. “I've got a lot of ideas but I need to start making a concrete plan so that I can submit a request for school funds. I'm going to come in early tomorrow morning to scope out the place and really start making decisions."

“Oh wow, you’ll probably be here before anyone else then, won’t you?”

Adrien’s eyes flew open. Despite the exhaustion he felt in his bones, that sounded a lot like an opportunity. Definitely one that he couldn’t pass up.

Marinette groaned. “Don’t remind me. Just thinking about waking up that early is making me feel tired.”

Their conversation was cut short when class started, but the gears were already turning in his head. This plan was destined for success!

---------------

Shambling through the deserted halls of the school, Marinette made her way towards her classroom. There was still plenty of time before she actually needed to be there, and she had nowhere better to be. Sure, she could technically go back home and slip into bed, but that would only buy her what? Twenty minutes? As strong willed a fully-awake Marinette COULD be, years of abused alarm clocks and delayed mornings reminded her that she'd end up being late today too. So to class it was.

Her plans were to get as comfortable as possible and fall asleep at her desk. Alya would definitely wake her up before class started. What she didn’t account for, however, was the classroom not being empty. Which might not have been that bad, if it weren’t for the fact that it was Adrien Agreste standing in the middle of the room looking pensively at a sweater sitting on a table.

A sweater which he must have just been wearing since the only thing covering his chest was a sleeveless undershirt. Marinette entered the room hesitantly.

“G-good morning, Adrien!” Nailed it. “What’s, um, what’s the matter?” Not perfect, but she’d take it.

“Oh!” He looked over at her and smiled, making her heart do a backflip. “Hello, Marinette. I’m just trying to figure out how what I’m going to do with my sweater.” He turned back to the piece of clothing in question and held it up. His hand poked through a large rip in the side. “The seam ripped and now I’m stuck here in the cold without it.”

“I could fix it for you!” She winced at how excited she sounded. Thankfully, he didn’t seem to mind. “Since, I, um, since I have a sewing kit on me most of the time.”

“Really? That’s great!” His eyes sparkled with joy and he offered the ruined sweater to her. “Would you please?”

“Of course! Just give me a few minutes…” She pulled out her miniature sewing kit and sat down at her desk to work. Adrien took Alya’s spot and watched her work.

“So what brings you in so early?”

In her surprise, she almost missed a stitch. “Oh, um, you remember that thing I was telling you just under a month ago?”

“Three weeks ago, actually.” She glanced over to him to see his chin resting on his hand. “That is, if you’re talking about the charity auction.”

“Y-yeah, that. So, ah, I needed to do some scouting for locations and talk to some teachers. Before I make any committees or anything.”

His eyebrows flew up. “Committees? This sounds a lot bigger than I thought it was.”

“Kinda? I, um, I tend to go… a little overboard. Sometimes. You know?”

“I get what you mean,” he smiled. “I can be a little… much sometimes too.”

She didn’t know what to say to that, but he seemed perfectly happy with companionable silence. After a few minutes of swift stitches, she’d fixed the sweater. She passed it back to him and smiled at how his face lit up. She watched him slip it over his head and giggled when his mop of perfectly styled hair popped out.

“Thanks, Marinette. You really helped me out here. Why don’t you let me make it up to you?”

“Oh no, you don’t have to-”

"I'm free this evening - for once - and I was wondering if you'd like to go out?"

For a moment, her soul left her body and she froze up. This couldn’t be happening. Adrien Agreste did not just ask her out. Then her mind processed what he’d said and she relaxed a little. He didn’t say on a date, he just said to hang out. Like friends.

"Oh! How about dinner and a movie?"

"That sounds great!"

She saw their friends through the glass. They’d gotten here a little early too, but not by much. People were going to start funneling into the school any minute now.

"Awesome! There's Alya and Nino, I'll go tell them!"

Clearly, he wanted to hang out with all his friends, right? They rarely all got to hang out together - surely he was itching for an opportunity to spend an evening having fun. He probably meant that he would pay for her fare when they go out as her reward for fixing his sweater. Yeah. That made sense.

"Yeah, and-wait. Marinette!"

Marinette was so happy that she’d get to spend time with Adrien, so focused on telling Alya and Nino the good news, that she didn’t even notice Adrien groan and bury his face in his hands as she left the room.

------------------

Adrien was on the verge of having a good time, which was to say he was having a very frustrating time.

He had spent the entire night like that - always so close to what he wanted while being so far away. At dinner, Marinette sat next to him, took a bite off his plate (at his insistence) to try what he had ordered. At the movies, he shared popcorn with the love of his life, saw her face illuminated by the light of the big screen. And yet it was NOT a date and she was painfully unaware of how adorable she was being. Like how her nose crinkled when he made a pun. Or how she gets excited over the good food. All the while Alya and Nino were practically all over each other, being exactly what he wanted to be with Marinette. He felt like his head was going to explode.

It was both a blessing and a curse when they stopped at Marinette’s house and Adrien stepped out to hold the door open for her. When he slid back into the car, he was surprised to see both Alya and Nino staring at him.

“Is… something wrong?” Adrien asked, looking cautiously between them. He was having trouble reading their expressions.

“So, are you going to tell us what tonight was all about, sunshine?” Alya watched him carefully and crossed her arms in front of her.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about. Today was… a fun hangout. Between friends.” As much as the words tasted like ashes in his mouth, that was exactly what the day had been.

“Dude…” Nino tugged on his hat and shook his head. “We’re not blind. There was some kinda something going on in the background. Marinette might have been too caught up in-” He was cut off by a glare from Alya. “Um, things… but we totally noticed. You looked supes frustrated most of the night. When you weren’t making goo goo eyes at M, at least.”

No. No way was he going to have this conversation. The first person to find out his feelings for Marinette was going to be Marinette. Not his prying, if well-meaning friends.

“Sorry, bro. I can’t say anything.” He put a hand on Nino and Alya’s shoulders. “But trust me, guys. WHEN something happens between me and Marinette, you’ll be the first to know.”

Alya’s eyes lit up and she leaned forward to interrogate him further, but Nino pulled her back.

“Sorry, babe. This is your stop. You’ll have to terrify my bro later.”

She glanced rapidly between Nino, Adrien, and the Gorilla, made a face as if she'd sucked on a lemon and sternly pointed at Adrien.

“You better treat her right, centerfold.”

Nino and Adrien rode in silence for a few minutes, Nino only breaking the quiet when they arrived at his home.

Hovering at the car door, he poked his head in and said, “I’m happy for you, bro. You’ll be good for each other, I can already tell.” He grinned and held out his fist. “Good luck, dude.”

Adrien returned his smile and bumped his fist against Nino’s. “Thanks, dude.”

-------------------

Back at home, Adrien collapsed onto the bed and stared up at the ceiling. He wanted to bang his head against his desk in frustration. He had been so close!

Although today hadn’t gone as planned, it hadn’t been a bad time. If he had ever been uncertain about dating her before, he wasn’t now. Not when he saw first hand how amazing a date with her could be. No one could deny that he was getting closer to his goal, either. Maybe actual double dates wouldn’t be too far removed from his future after all? Then they could look back at this and laugh…

Plagg snickered. “I guess the casual approach didn’t work out too well for you, kid.”

“It worked alright,” Adrien said with a frown. “It could’ve worked better, though. My problem was that the date idea was too much like a normal hang out. I need to have a more concrete date in mind when I ask next. Something so romantic that she can’t possibly mistake it for just hanging out.”

“You know what would be even more effective? If you just-hey!” Plagg was cut off when a flying pillow slammed into him. Even from beneath the plush layers of fluff, Adrien could hear Plagg loudly cackling.

[kirathehyrulian]

♥• Obsession: Dark Desires Art Master Post•♥

Please do not repost or alter. At the very least, please give me credit.

Spn Eldritch Bang | Author | Illustrator | Fic- Ao3 | LJ

Title: Rating: Explicit Wordcount: 17,321 Pairings:  unrelated Dean/Sam, Fic Warnings:  Gore/Violence, dark!Dean, bottom!Sam, top!Dean

Summary: Sam and Dean have always been close. Their fathers had gone on many hunts together, so the boys had grown up around each other. When Sam goes to Stanford, Dean stays behind to hunt on his own. But when Dean can't stand being away from Sam any longer, he goes to see Sam at Stanford. And what he finds sends him into a downward spiral no one could have been prepared for.

Art Warnings!!!: (The Rest of the art below this cut are depictions of major fic spoilers and some gore. Please, only click the “Keep Reading” link if you are mentally prepared and have already read the fic.)

Artist Commentary: (scroll down some more if you just want the art)

I struggled a lot with coming up with what I wanted to do for this fic. My author gave me a free rein to do whatever scenes and styles inspired me. They only asked for obsessed!Dean, innocent!Sam, and concerned fathers Bobby and John.

I chose not to focus on John or Bobby. I threw the idea around for a bit, but I’m not really adept at drawing them so I didn’t want to obsess, hah, about how it doesn’t look like them enough. So, all the art is mostly about Sam and Dean.

Again, I wanted this story’s art to be creepy. I wanted most of it to come off unsettling. So I looked at horror games. “Dreaming Mary” was the first one I looked at. It was a cutesy, very disturbing and triggering game. It had two-faced characters, warped reality, chibis, and some silhouettes. I figured it was a good direction to go in.

But, then when I started sketching out silhouette ideas, my friend ended up saying it reminded her of “Fran Bow”’s cut scenes. I’m not really a fan of Fran Bow. It was too random for me, but I probably did subconsciously draw inspiration from that game too. And, I decided to visit that game some more. So I combined the thoughts that I got from both games.

At first, I was thinking about black and white silhouettes with a black and white film feel. But, I already did black and white in suffocation. I wanted these illustrations and style to be different because it’s an entirely different story. So, red is the new white.

I did the title card first. I drew inspiration from old turner classic movie intros before you see the main feature film with the spotlight and text font and placement. I made a bunch of hearts that stare at you to convey obsession. I drew skulls to showcase death and to be creepy. The patterns I made were supposed to be unsettling. I completed the rest of the illustrations in this order, scene: 1, 4, 2, 5, 6, 3. And, all the scenes are supposed to be the world through Dean’s twisted lens.

Scene 1: they’re in an alleyway with Sam yelling. I tried to make him look young here, to convey innocence. Light is coming from the back of Sam to show that the alleyway is vaguely dark.

Scene 2: Lol. I tried. It ended up looking goofy and oddly enduring to me. I love my drooling boy. He’s not drooling, he’s bleeding. Lee here has lost his hands, has a broken jaw, and is getting his eyes poked in with Dean’s thumbs.

Scene 3: Dean is happy to finally get close and personal with Sam. I tried to make Sam look innocently at Dean in shock, and Dean more sultry, whatever. There is a wall behind Sam. The arm that is caressing Sam’s hair is a different shade of red to make it stand out so it doesn’t get lost in their combined silhouette and that it looks like it’s further in the background. The light here is so you don’t get to distracted by all the empty space to the left. And, it's because of my sleep-deprived mind, but when I stare at the area around their noses for long enough they look like they are moving towards each other.

Scene 4: I was really excited about drawing this idea. So, this is Dean’s reality finally breaking down. To him in the roadhouse, these are all the monsters trying to take Sam away from Dean. John, Bobby, and Victor from left to right. The monster designs were me trying to connect the title heart faces to how Dean sees everyone that’s not Sam. In everyone else’s reality, Sam’s pissed at Dean. It is the Sam that jabbed Dean in the side, watched his fiance get killed, got kidnapped, know about Lee getting killed, probably had dubious sex with unrelated Dean, and so on. So, while the silhouette Sam is gasping, or yelling in innocent concern, reality Sam is less innocent and more pissed. Lol, Real-Sam's frown might be too exaggerated to be taken seriously....sigh.

Scene 5: I was actually very proud of how real-Dean turned out here, I doubt I’ll ever get it that good again in this style. I tried to make Real-Dean rougher and more disturbed looking, and like he will gut everyone not-Sam. The shiny glass looking thing behind Dean is a swot member arresting Dean. The arms are Dean’s view of the swot members. They don’t get real bodies because they are not important in Dean’s view here andIgotlazy.

Scene 6: Remember when I said earlier when I don’t think I’d get it that good again. Well, I didn’t. It’s not bad, but this Dean didn’t come out as good, which really bummed me out. It’s good enough, but not what I wished it could be. Dean the stalker is stalking Sam here. I’m happy with my car (even though I can’t draw a steering wheel to save my life) and fuzzy background though, and I normally hate cars and backgrounds. Bad Dean for not wearing his seat belt though. Do not emulate, kids.

Overall, I’m happy or okay with what I did here depending on what we’re pointing out.

Enjoy, if you can!♥♥♥

Musical Inspiration (Things that I listened to this time to get in the mood to draw, but not meant as an accompaniment to the fic):

I listened to a lot of the same stuff for this project as I did for “Suffocation” but here are some ones that I didn’t list before | Dark Piano - Waiting for Sunrise | Little Nightmares OST "A Feeling for Meat" | Dark Piano - Witch | HANNIBAL OST MEDLEY | Emotional Music - A Nostalgic Dream |

[arcanesupern0va]

Rick In The Water; Ch11: Exit Wounds

Summary: The night of Ryan's death from Nova's perspective.

A/N: This chapter was so fucking hard to write. It broke my heart to put myself in the fucking shoes of Ryan and say such horrifying things about my bb. The next chapter will deal with Nova dealing with the trauma of the aftermath of everything that happened. My poor sweet girl 😭 Also, next time I do interwoven chapters I will absolutely try to do them so much better. I wasn't thinking about using the hospital scene in this chapter but I wanted to kind of try to explain why she was acting the way she was and I just don't think it's the best. It's not the most important part of the chapter so I'm going to leave it alone. I tried really hard to word it right but I just couldn't get it to feel the way I wanted it to within the parameters I'd set in the last chapter. In any case, this story is a trial and error of me trying to hone my skill again after years of being unable to focus long enough to tell a story of this caliber and length so I just kind of hope you guys bear that in mind when you're reading. Thank you so much for reading and commenting, it really means the world to me! -Jess♥ CW: There is heavy violence and extremely abusive language within. Please continue with caution. Pairing: Rick Sanchez/Reader Word Count: 7179

My ao3

Masterlist

|Ch10: Nothing Follows, Nothing Stays| 

+Nova+

The previous night

The car ride to get Madison was the kind of terse silence that should be used to torture information out of violent offenders. I was ‘lucky’ to even be brought along on the trip but rumors that I had become a recluse was tarnishing Ryan’s reputation earned me my first painful steps out of the house.

“You have one hour. I want you looking put together and refined,” he demanded sharply. I had been in the kitchen, scrubbing the counters down as per his request when he stormed in angrily. “People think you’ve become some fucked up hermit after losing your job. I’m going to see to it that you put an end to it.” I nodded obediently, dropping what minuscule crumbs that had been on the counter in the trash and hurried upstairs.

I was in and out of the shower in a flash, sitting down at my vanity to dry and style my hair. I avoided meeting my own eyes in the mirror, unable to bear the sight of the large bruise that circled my eye, courtesy of a misinterpreted offhand comment. I brought my hair into a high braided bun, simple enough but also didn’t allow any extra leverage if Ryan decided I had done something to upset him. I started on makeup, struggling to make any real change to the dark circle. I went over to my closet, retrieving a long halter sundress and a light cardigan to cover the hand-shaped bruises that covered my arms and legs. I posed in the mirror meekly, surveying myself carefully. The dark around my eye still drew the most attention so I dug around for a little while, finally extracting a pair of large sunglasses from an old purse. Their tint was dark enough to mask the bruising while the frame large enough to cover it.

I returned to the vanity to touch up my lipstick but I found myself staring out into space as anxiety seeped into my resolve. I was terrified of having to confront him, all these bruises, my busted lip; they had all been for this night. Once Madison got home, I was going to wait until Ryan went to sleep for the night and finally make my escape. The plan was to go straight to Beth’s house. If Ryan showed up, the cops could be called or if worse came to worst, Rick would just kill him. It was tempting but the thought of Madison growing up without a father who loved her reminded me too much of how I grew up. I couldn’t let that happen to her too.

I couldn’t let her end up like me.

“What in the fuck are you doing? We’re going to be late!” Ryan swore as he flung the bedroom door open, glaring down as he surveyed my outfit carefully. “I guess this will have to do, put on those sunglasses. We’ve got to fucking go.”

I grabbed the closest pair of shoes, unfortunately not my trusty running shoes, but a pair of high heeled wedges. Ryan grew frustrated quickly as he watched me wobble across the carpeted floor, grabbing my wrist to pull me behind him. I managed the first few steps but stumbled despite my best efforts, colliding into the wall as a sharp pain shot through both my ankle and my brow line. Ryan groaned in frustration as blood trickled down the curve of my nose.

“You have got to be fucking kidding.”

He released my wrist with enough force to send it in to the wall as well. The old wound ached at the impact as tears streamed down my face. I limped into the bathroom, gingerly inspecting the damage in the mirror. A large gash now split my brow as blood continued pouring out. Wetting a washcloth, I pressed it to my forehead as I searched for the liquid bandaid I kept for things just like this.

“(Y/N), stop fucking around, let’s fucking go,” Ryan bellowed, walking into the bathroom. He watched my methodical application of what was essentially glue, a small smirk forming over his face at every wince of pain. Was he enjoying this? Was watching me suffer this much of a thrill to him? I returned my sunglasses to my face, relieved when they covered most of my brow line to conceal the wound, pulling my bangs back down to cover the rest. I popped a couple of painkillers to try to mitigate the pain still shooting through my ankle.

“I’m ready,” I announced timidly. I walked carefully, trying to ignore the shooting pain I felt with every step. When I was outside, I didn’t dare look anywhere near the Smith household. I couldn’t see Rick right now. I wouldn’t be able to resist the urge to throw myself into his arms again, to feel that overwhelming sense of protection I hadn’t even noticed until it was ripped away from me. I could feel his eyes on me but with Ryan putting on the show of dutiful husband, I couldn’t chance it.

*+*

The drive was long, only the dulcet tones of the talk radio he enjoyed so fervently. A man droned on and on about stocks and their rising and falling but I found my usual comfort in staring out the window. If I closed my eyes for a moment, I could tell myself this was Rick’s ship. I could pretend, even for that short moment, that it was Rick next to me just taking me out on another adventure. The illusion would inevitably be shattered by the mind-numbing voice on the radio, a poor replacement for the low music always playing in Rick's ship.

“When we get home, you may mend your ankle but for the time being you are to act as though nothing is wrong,” he told me as he swerved in and around traffic. “We will be stopping for dinner on the way home, I won’t have time to wait for you to make it yourself.”

“I-I’m sorry-”

“Quiet. I am in no mood to listen to your voice.”

Picking up Madison went as smoothly as I could’ve hoped. The pain killers had their intended effect, numbing the pain enough for me walk smoothly in the high heels. I was able to keep my sunglasses on, never going inside or anywhere else that would have warranted their removal. We made small talk with the other parents and Ryan even told jokes. Everything a normal and happy couple would do; Ryan’s mission seemed to be completed, at least for today. The other parents seemed overjoyed to see me, assuring me of how happy they were as a couple of the husbands nudged him with remarks of how they were glad we hadn’t killed each other yet.

When we finally climbed back into the car, Madison shoved her earbuds into her ears, blasting music to drown out the world around her. Ryan glared into the rearview mirror but said nothing to her, instead, berating me in a low voice for allowing this kind of behavior at all. He begrudgingly stopped at the closest fast-food chain that was still open this late; ordering for the car in the drive-thru before parking the car and divvying out the food. I was given a salad and muttered comments about my weight, my cheeks burning red. It tasted like ash in my mouth but I swallowed every bite knowing there would be repercussions if I left a single leaf to waste.

I was relieved when our exit finally appeared, knowing the car ride from hell was almost over. This life from hell was almost over. It was dark now, my sunglasses now being used for me to fiddle with anxiously. I straightened up in my seat, earning me a reproachful look from Ryan as he looked me over suspiciously. I slunk back into the seat at his piercing gaze and returned to the window, praying silently that this nightmare would truly be over soon.

I dared a glance at the Smith house as we pulled into the driveway, surprised to find the garage dark with the shutter still wide open. As Ryan delegated tasks to me, I dared a glance over to the garage, spotting a familiar blue glistening in the moonlight. I offered the most minute of smiles at the garage but the feeling of protection allowed to smile to linger allowing Ryan to quickly put two and two together.

“Madison, take this inside,” he ordered, handing her suitcase to her. He watched her disappear inside, before gripping my arm tightly.

“Don’t fucking think I didn’t fucking see that,” Ryan muttered as he twisted my arm behind my back. “Get in the fucking house.”

Obediently, I grabbed as many of Madison’s belongings as I could and carried them into the house without a second glance to Rick. Tonight was only going to work if I was careful. If I wanted to get out of this house with Madison and me intact, I had to focus on the task at hand, not Rick. I carried Madi’s bags up to her room, stopping to kick my wedges off by the door. My ankle cried out in anguish as I made my way up the stairs to her room, the painkillers finally wearing off. I knocked gently before pushing her door open to find her sitting on the side of her bed scrolling through her social media accounts and catching up with her friends.

“Sweetheart, why don’t you come downstairs?” I asked, sitting the bags down by the bed and holding my hand out to her. If she was distracted, she wouldn’t unpack. If she didn’t unpack, she would be ready to go as soon as possible.

“No, that’s okay Mom,” she replied, not even looking up from her phone, “Dad seems like he’s in another mood. I’ll just hang out up here.”

“I’ve missed you, sweetheart.”

My eyes welled with tears as I played with hair, twirling it around my fingers. Her brown hair was longer, almost reaching the small of her back. The sun had done well to lighten it a few shades in exchange for deepening her tan over the summer. She looked older and her general demeanor had seemed to mature as well.

“I missed you too, Mom,” she groaned, detaching from her phone long enough to smile up at me before immediately returning to it.

“I guess I’ll just leave you to your phone,” I teased. Kissing her head softly, she groaned at me loudly again before I finally took pity on her and left the room, leaving her to her friends to catch up. I stopped quickly in my bedroom, changing out of my long dress and into a tank top and sweats before taking a deep breath, steadying myself before heading back down the stairs.

“What were you and Madison talking about?” Ryan demanded, stepping out of the living room with a furious glare plastered on his face as my foot came in contact with the bottom step.

“N-Nothing Ryan,” I blurted out, stumbling back in surprise, “I just told her I missed her and asked if she wanted to come downstairs and spend time with us.”

“Mhm.” He watched my face carefully as I slipped around him into the living room, trying to find any inkling of a lie. “You really think I don’t know what you’re up to?”

“U-Up to? I’m not up to anything!” I lied, proving only to make him angrier.

“You’re going to take Madi and try to run away tonight, aren’t you?” he accused as he followed me, hysterics beginning to leak into his voice. “You are not taking my daughter anywhere and I will be damned if I let you go running back to your senior special.”

“R-Ryan, I am h-here. With you. Not Rick-”

“Don’t say his fucking name,” he spat. “You sound fucking pathetic.”

“Ryan, it was nothing. What happened between him and me, it meant nothing-”

“Shut your fucking mouth (Y/N). I don’t need you fucking insulting me. I’m not fucking stupid, at least not completely. I don’t know what’s been wrong with me this past fucking summer but that shit is over with. You are my fucking wife until death does us part. Don’t fucking make me speed up that process.”

“Ryan-”

“I fucking said shut up,” he bellowed, using the back of his hand to throw me into the couch. “Don’t you fucking start crying either. Don’t start fucking screaming. If anyone shows up here, I don’t care if it’s a fucking Mormon missionary going door to door, you’re going to fucking regret it. But don’t worry, you won’t die. Although, I'm not sure what the life expectancy is for a mother who lost a child violently.” He paused, eyeing me maliciously as the true threat of his words sunk in. “You’re out of control (Y/N) and I will do whatever it takes to put a stop to it and restore order to this house.”

I didn’t speak, but I couldn’t stop the silent tears that streaked down my cheeks. He had gone too far threatening Madison. I brought my hand to the stinging on my face and it seemed that even silent, the emotion still offended him. He grabbed my shoulders, shaking me violently as veins bulged in his forehead.

“I fucking told you not to cry.”

His shaking was getting harder yet, my head flinging forward and back sharply. I knew if I didn’t start fighting back soon, he wouldn’t stop until he snapped my neck. I brought my arms up between his to push his hands away from me, managing to take him by surprise and break out of his grip. I slid out of his reach, crawling away as he recovered. He caught up quickly, grabbing my ankle and pulling me back to him on my stomach. He flipped me over, doling punishment out by colliding his knuckles into my cheek violently as I tried to squirm away. On my back, I was able to deliver a swift kick to his groin, dodging out of the way of his onslaught. I pushed myself off the floor as he doubled over gasping for air. In a last-ditch attempt to buy myself some time as I fled the living room, I quickly flipped the light switch, plunging the room into darkness.

I headed to the kitchen, desperate for any kind of weapon to defend myself with. I could hear him groaning behind me so I flicked the light off behind me, trying to silently root for any sharp object to keep him at bay.

“Where are you, you stupid bitch?” he growled into the darkness. I sunk against the counter, trying to keep out of sight as he searched for the light switch. Light poured around me as I pressed myself against the counter, listening for his footsteps to edge toward my location. I tried desperately to press the panic button Rick had implanted in my hand what felt like ages ago. I never stopped trying to use it even though I knew it was in vain. A small part of me hoped that he could repair his, that he would realize I needed his help but it all seemed so hopeless. Deep down I was sure he had taken my words to heart. He had given up on me.

“If you stop this stupid shit, I promise I’ll make it fucking quick.” His footsteps turned around the kitchen island I hid behind, breaking me from my feelings of hopelessness as I continued inching around the island, trying to get around it before he could find me.

“I never understood why they called you Nova, you know? You, a star? That’s fucking comical,” he taunted, trying to lure me out. “The most you are is a fucking black hole.”

My ankle spasmed under my weight as I turned the corner and my position was blown when I face-planted onto the floor. He chuckled darkly as he rounded the island, glaring down at me.

“The reason they call me Nova wasn’t because of fucking stars you idiot,” I hissed, pulling myself off the floor with the knife extended in front of me. “If you’d ever paid a fucking iota of attention you’d know it was from fucking Planet of the fucking Apes. There was a charact-”

“You really must be a fucking moron if you think I actually give a fuck.” He shook his head in disbelief before launching himself at me. The impact forced me back into the wall, my head coming in contact with the wall and everything going dark.

*+*

“I’ve spent way too long fantasizing about this.”

My eyes blinked, quickly adjusting to the inky darkness of my bedroom. My back rested against the foot of my bed as Ryan stood over me, sneering as I returned to consciousness. I tried to stand, only earning another backhand for my insolence. The small chair from my vanity became the next subject of his rage as he picked it up and broke one of the legs off. He inspected the sharpest end before turning to face me again.

“My parents told me women with bad childhoods were guaranteed whores, but you always seemed so fucking genuine. Somehow, my stupid ass fell in love with you and God only knows why I went and had a baby with you.”

“You’ve never loved anything in your life,” I hissed weakly.

“You’re probably right, it always kind of seemed like a waste of my fucking time,” he nodded, “but there I was, getting married to a girl with every red flag my parents warned me about. Mommy didn’t love you? Check. Daddy maybe loved you too much? Check. Abandoned by most of the adults she came in contact with? Fucking home run.”

“You’re fucking wrong.”

“Oh come the fuck off of it (Y/N),” he glowered, “The only reason I wanted you was because I already knew you could be beaten into submission if that’s what it took. You’d spent your entire life that way, you wouldn’t even know the fucking difference.”

“Fuck you.”

“I could make time for that if you wanted.” He offered darkly, his eyes glittering with malice before rolling at my cowered form. “It wouldn’t be worth it, you’d only be thinking of Colonel Blimp next door.”

“What are you going to tell Madison?” I asked desperate to change the subject. “How are you going to explain to her that you killed her mother? She’s not going to just forgive you. She's smarter than you've ever given her credit for.”

“I don’t give a fuck about that stupid brat,” he scoffed with another roll of his eyes. “She’s too fucking much like you.”

I couldn’t muster a reply. My blood ran cold as my heart raced with fury. He watched my face, seeming to relish in the fear of my revelation. He truly did not want me to have anything. My daughter, my friends, they were all allowed purely because they could be taken away.

“Why me?” I uttered finally, tears brimming in my eyes as I watched him twirl the broken chair leg around in his hand.

“You were pathetic. I took you home and fucked you on the first date.” He shrugged smugly. “I knew your kind, I knew the words that it would take to get what I wanted from you.”

I closed my eyes for a moment, taking a calming breath before pushing myself off of the floor to look at the man who had made my life a living hell in the eyes. I groaned as I put pressure on my ankle only to stumble back onto the bed. Ryan laughed at the sight, his chuckling continuing as I awkwardly pushed myself back up, swaying as I stared up at him.

“Like I said, you abusive piece of shit, you don’t fucking know me at all.”

My words set him off and he pushed me back into the bed, my head ricocheting off the headboard with a loud yelp. I stood back up, my head spinning from the impact as I tried to catch my balance again. Being disoriented made it easy for Ryan to overpower me again, forcing me back onto the floor and holding the chair leg to my stomach.

“When are you going to fucking learn (Y/N)? You’re fucking nothing,” he declared smugly, pushing the improvised weapon into my stomach. I cried out as it broke my skin, pain searing out from the wound through my entire body. My body screamed at me to fight against him but with every minuscule movement, he drove the spike in deeper.

“Rick-” I cried out weakly, my voice raw with pain.

“He won’t save you, (Y/N). Why would he want to? He left you once before and it seems it was easy for him to do it again. Where is your savior (Y/N)? Why isn't he here to save you if he loved you so much?”

A light appeared under the doorway, calling my attention to it quickly. The door burst open quickly, relief coursing through my body. Ryan was wrong. He had come to save me.

“M-Mom?” Madi stepped in nervously, stepping in the pool of blood that had formed next to me. “D-Dad, what are you doing? Stop hurting her!”

“You should’ve stayed in bed Madison,” Ryan hissed, driving the spike into my gut completely, leaving me to scream out in pain.

I clawed desperately at the wood now buried in my gut as Ryan chased Madi out of the room, trailing my blood behind him. He returned mere seconds later, a crazed look forming over his face as he lumbered back over to me, picking me up by the straps of my tank top. He drew back, bringing his fist down to crash into my cheek repeatedly. I wanted to fight back, to do anything to stop his assault but my arms only hung loosely by my sides as broken English began pouring out of his mouth. The ringing in my ears prevented me from understanding a word he was saying and my eyes were swelling shut so when he abruptly stopped, I simply assumed I was dead.

“Nova!” A  gruff voice cut desperately through the ringing and I swore I saw the blue hair that reminded me of home as I finally allowed myself to slip into darkness.

*+*

That man sure has an oddly shaped head.

“She’s going to need to be put under, we have to open this wound further to get the shards of wood out.”

I wonder if his brain is the same shape as his head, he must be really smart.

“Sh-She was attacked, I-I think she was stabbed with a wooden spike.”

He sounds like Rick. I miss him so much, where is he? Where is Rick? He said he would save me.

“Sir, I promise you, we will help her. You just have to allow us the space to do so.”

“H-Her name is Nova. P-Please, don’t let anything happen to her. I can’t- I can’t lose her.”

Rick?

*+*

The world around me was dense, lush forest surrounded us as Rick and I sat hand in hand as we watched the waterfall in the distance cascade into the small river beneath it. I dared to glance over to him, receiving a playful smile as he averted his gaze. I giggled, turning my own gaze away, I peeked over again only to find Ryan in his stead, leering down at me viciously. My blood ran cold as I saw Rick’s mangled body beside him, contorted into an unnatural form as he stretched his arm out to me desperately before Ryan finished him off. With one last crushing blow from his boot, Ryan extinguished any form of life in Rick’s eyes, something he assured me of by bringing the optical gore mere inches away from my face. I cringed, looking down to avoid the view only to find the chair leg wedged into my gut once more. I looked up again desperately, only to find myself completely alone save for the gurgling corpse a couple of feet away.

“He’ll never be able to protect you from me (Y/N). You can run as far away as you want but I will always find you.”

“Nova? Is that your name?” a gentle voice asked. I blinked as I awoke, wincing from the blaring light filling the room. I slammed my eyes shut again as the voice asked his question again and the bed lowered next to me as he sat down.

“N-Nova,” I rasped, trying to nod in confirmation. My neck was stiff, making any movement impossible. “Wh-Where am I?”

“You’re in an alien hospital. Well, it’s alien to you, to me it’s just a hospital,” he informed me genially. I tried to open my eyes again, squinting to find the same oddly shaped head I’d seen in my dream.

“H-How’d I get here?”

“Your family brought you in. You had a deep wound to your torso.” My eyes widened as I brought my hands to my stomach, surprised to find none of the pain it provided previously. Instead, a low ache reverberated throughout, far more manageable than the searing pain from before.

“Wh-What happened to me? My husband- Ryan, he-he…” I fumbled my words, tears stinging my eyes at the memory.

“We were able to repair the damage done by the wooden spear he lodged into you,” the doctor informed me, “You’ll be back to normal in no time my dear, just have to wait for the stitches to heal away. They’re medicated with a serum that hastens the healing process. It should only take about a week until you’re back to normal, physically speaking.”

“M-My family, where is my daughter?” I asked tearfully, taking time to survey the room, expecting them to pop out at any moment.

“She’s out in the waiting room with the rest of your family and when you’re ready, we can send them back. We should also be able to discharge you soon, as long as you’re feeling up to it.” I nodded eagerly, sitting up a little to be more presentable. He smiled wisely, saying nothing more as he left the room presumably to go find my family. I continued straightening myself up, taking a moment to peek under the hospital gown to get a look at the long scar now gracing my body.

“Mom!” Madison cried out as she entered the room, rushing to my side a tearful mess. I held her tightly, patting her back soothingly as she wept and muttered apologies into my hair, “Mom, I’m sorry. I should’ve done something sooner, I should’ve tried to stop him, I was just so scared. I’m so sorry.”

“Baby, there’s nothing you could’ve done. You did the right thing, getting out of there and going to Beth’s. I’m so proud of you.” I left a watery kiss on her hairline, as Beth finished talking to the doctor, turning to survey me.

“Nova, how are you feeling? What happened?” she asked urgently, finally tearing her gaze away from the pulp I called a face.

“Jeez Mom, calm the hell down,” Summer chastised her before I could answer. She met my gaze with a watery one of her own, “Aunt Nova, I’m so glad you’re alright.” Madison left my side briefly, allowing her surrogate sister to hug me tightly. As Summer pulled away wiping away her tears, my eyes fell to Beth again, decidedly ignoring the lanky man who’d been watching me intently with a look of painful regret.

“I’m okay you guys,” I assured Beth, “The man with the oddly shaped head said I’ll be able to leave whenever I’m ready.” She forced herself into my arms, sobbing into my shoulder.

“I don’t know what I’d do if I ever lost you, Nova,” she sobbed. I rubbed her back as I’d done for Madi before she abruptly pulled away, wiping away her tears roughly. “He’s gone, Nova, he’s dead.”

My eyes flicked to Rick quickly, trying to fight the horrified rage boiling into my gut. Ryan was dead and Rick had been the one to kill him. Exactly what I hadn’t wanted to happen. I couldn’t be completely enraged, but it was easier and more justifiable to just be angry. How was I going to explain this to the police? I was going to lose Rick for sure now, and despite the feeling of relief welling in my gut, an inexplicable heartbreak was squashing it down at the thought of losing him when I finally became free to have him. If even he still wanted me.

“What happened?” I asked quietly, finally meeting Rick’s sorrowful gaze.

“His heart gave out. I didn’t even have to lay a finger on him, it was pretty anticlimactic really,” he explained with a careless shrug. Just the sound of his voice was making my heart race and a part of me wanted to climb out of the bed and fling myself into his arms but I hardened myself to him, turning to Madi instead.

“I’m so sorry sweetheart,” I offered to her softly. She would never know the cruel things her father said about her, she knew he was a monster, but she could at least live under the illusion of his unending love for her.

“I’m glad he’s dead Mom,” she told me sharply, standing up from the bed.

“Y-You don’t mean that sweetheart.” I insisted. I didn’t want this for her, I didn’t want her to go through the same pain I went through. I pulled the blanket off of my lap, relishing in the cool air the swirl around my legs.

“I do mean that. Dad was a monster a-and after what he did to you? He deserved to die,” she assured me coldly. I didn't have it in me to convince her otherwise and I slumped back onto the bed in defeat.

“N-Nova, sweetie, what happened?” Beth asked cautiously, her eyes flitting to Summer’s quickly to stave off another interruption.

“I-I don’t want to talk about it, not here.” I brushed her off, standing up from the bed, a ghost of a pain shooting through my ankle. I was grateful it hadn’t lingered, seemingly repaired along with my other egregious injuries. I moved to the chair next to the bed where I found a bag containing my clothes.

“When we get home, I promise I’ll explain.”

Beth conceded, ushering the kids out of the room so I could change. I dug through the bag, dismayed to find only the blood-soaked clothes I been wearing when I got here. Rick stayed behind, still watching me awkwardly as I pulled the stained sweats out of the bag.

“D-Do you need some help?” he offered timidly as the door shut with a click. I shook my head quickly, stubbornly pulling the sweats on under the gown. “Y-You don’t have to wear those, I can get you something else.”

“No Rick, don’t worry about it,” I hissed, pulling the sweats up over my hips before grabbing my shirt.

“Come on Nova, let me get you something else, let me help you-”

I took a deep breath, trying to stop the anger and terror I had been living with for the past few months from boiling to the surface. I didn't want to snap, I knew I had hurt him but as my gaze found Rick, despite the look of sorrow that seemed to be a permanent fixture on his face, the sight of him only made me angrier. All of that talk of protecting me and he still fucking left me high and dry. Again.

“Oh, now you want to fucking help?”

He grabbed the shirt out of my hands, solidifying my anger as I spun around, looking up at him with all the hate I could muster. Every feeling of hopelessness and terror coursed through me as I looked into the eyes of the man who claimed he wouldn’t leave me, not again. Not unless I asked.

“Y-Yes?” he sputtered, looking confused at the sudden turn of my mood.

“That’s pretty fucking funny, could’ve used it a lot fucking sooner.” I yanked the shirt back out of his hands, pulling it over my head.

“N-Nova, you told me to leave you alone. You told me you didn’t want me anymore. I didn’t know what to do, B-Beth thought you were waiting for Madi to come home-”

“N-No!” I bellowed back at him, “I mean a fucking hours ago when my husband almost fucking killed me.”

“Wh-What? I was there as soon as I could be- as soon as I heard anything,” he insisted, running his hands through his hair.

“The moment we walked in the door, it was over. He was out for my fucking blood.”

“I-I didn’t hear anything Nova, I’m sorry,” he apologized. Seeing him look completely defeated, my rage softened. Rick was someone who was always five steps ahead. Seeing him like this, looking so lost, broke my heart. “You didn’t use your panic button- I was going to get you out of there tonight, I-I didn’t know.”

“I did use my fucking panic button,” I assured him venomously. Just as soon as my heart softened to him, the mention of that useless fucking piece of technology enraged me all over again. “But I guess it doesn’t fucking work when the body housing its receiver is floating through the fucking vacuum of space.”

I watched as the blood drained out his face at the realization and I couldn't help but feel justified by his reaction. I had come to terms with it, knowing he hadn’t even thought of it since we hadn’t even used it since I moved in with Beth. I couldn’t blame him, not entirely. It hadn’t crossed my mind either and when I left, it had been so abrupt- there had been no time.

“I didn’t- I didn’t even think about that,” he confessed, despondent, “I just thought- I mean I heard you guys fighting but I thought if he was hurting you-”

“I used that fucking panic button every fucking night.”

“I’m sorry, Nova, I’m so fucking sorry. I let you down,” he murmured sadly, staring at the floor.

“I thought you gave up on me. I know what I said to you was cruel but I thought you would be smart enough to see right through it. Guess you let your ego get in the way.” My voice was distant, unable to sustain my anger anymore. I didn’t want to be upset with him, I lived, I was going to be okay, at least physically.

“Baby, I’m sorry,” he cried. The sound of his wavering voice crumbled my resolve, allowing me to finally move closer to him, prepared to offer him some comfort, “I never gave up on you. I just-I thought you had a plan, that you were just waiting for Madison- I just let myself believe what you said so I wouldn’t beat down the door and put her at risk.”

“I was waiting for Madi. You were at least right about that,” I relented, pulling the torn and bloodied shirt off with the gown underneath. I watched as his eyes found the scar that now distorted my torso. “I can’t wear this shit, can you find me something else?” I offered, extending a metaphorical olive branch.

“Of course.”

He opened up a portal stepping through it and re-emerging with fresh clothes, including undergarments and my running shoes.

“Did you just go into my house?” I asked, almost horrified at the clothes presented to me.

“I mean, I don’t know your sizes, I just figured-”

“These are fine, thank you, Rick,” I interrupted him, pulling off my sweats, tossing them and the tank top into the trash. It was somehow strange to be standing here, completely naked in front of him but I didn’t shy away, didn’t take any extra care to hide my dignity. He wasn’t leering down at me like I was a piece of meat, he just wore a look of concern carried in his furrowed brow.

“Beth knows,” Rick told me softly as I finished tying my shoes. I froze a moment, looking up at him in horror at the implication.

“Sh-She knows…?”

“About us,” he confirmed with a curt nod.

“H-How did she- Oh she must be furious,” I rambled, running my hands through my hair as I started pacing.

“She’s not mad,” Rick assured me, grabbing my shoulders to stop me in my tracks, “She thinks it's… strange but she said it kind of made… sense?”

“Sh-She did?”

He nodded quickly, pulling me into his embrace. I melted into him completely, finally able to allow myself to release the stress on my shoulders. There was so much. Burying Ryan, dealing with the police, the house but right now in Rick’s arms, that all fell along the wayside.

*+*

It didn't take long for my entire world to fall apart. The moment I stepped through that portal, it seemed the entire world felt wrong. Gone was the comforting, if not brazen lights of the hospital. I spent my first week back dealing with the police answering every single one of their difficult questions.

“Where did the blood come from?”

“What happened that night, is it possible you did something to set him off?”

“Your injuries have never been reported and you have no visible wounds, we have no history of abuse in this household.”

Rick had offered to just make Ryan’s body disappear but I knew there would be people who would be looking for him, his parents, his coworkers. This path, however, resulted in me spending a night in jail. It didn't last long though, Rick stormed in demanding I be set free within the first hour I was there. When he was met with opposition, he merely nodded and asked to speak to the chief of police to straighten things out. He would never fully explain what he said to the man but when he emerged from the now docile police chief's office, I was released and free of all charges. My house was still a crime scene but I had no interest in going home. Beth eagerly welcomed me back into her home instead, clearing out Jerry’s office completely to put a bed in, allowing me some form of sanctuary. She even snuck over to my house and grabbed my living room TV to mount on the wall for added comfort.

This didn’t stop the frequent nightmares, however. Most nights I would wake up screaming, and depending who woke up first either Rick or Beth would appear to soothe me. Despite this, Rick and I hadn’t returned to our previous level of comfort with one another and I desperately missed it. The little kisses snuck in whenever there had been an opportunity, him playing with my hair while we watched TV… I missed it all. I missed it and yet I couldn't quite bring myself to broach the topic.

“Nova,” Beth called, knocking on my door softly one afternoon, about a week after I’d been released from custody. I knew why she was here already, she wanted to talk about Rick, about what happened before and after Ryan’s death. All the things I desperately wanted to avoid. I had given her cliff notes of that night and she seemed to be satisfied. Now she was just interested in understanding my relationship with her father.

“Come in,” I sighed wearily, gearing up for the conversation I had been dreading. I focused my attention on my TV, desperately trying to seem invested in whatever adult cartoon was playing to put it off even another minute longer.

“Nova, I wanted to talk to you,” Beth started, her eyes flicking up to the TV. I sighed again, muting it as I turned to her. “I just wanted to talk about you and… Dad.”

“I figured as much,” I conceded, cringing at her. “What, within reason, do you wanna know?”

“Well, how did this start?” She asked timidly, not quite able to meet my eyes.

“When he came back,’ I assured her, resting my hand on hers.

“I-I know that. I meant, when after he came back?” she pressed gently.

And so I launched into our sordid story. Starting with the dampener and only editing some of the details like the encounter with Unity and the first time we’d slept together, mostly just to save her the trauma. I told her about the Council of Ricks and how Ricks and Novas were a common occurrence in most of the dimensions. He and I were just two people that fit together like puzzle pieces. She stayed silent as I spoke but I took care to note that she wasn’t angry, she wasn’t upset, if anything, she almost looked satisfied.

“Ryan caught us i-in the garage. We had been… m-making out and he had walked over, looking for me. That’s when he dragged me out. That’s the end of our story,” I concluded, unsuccessfully fighting the mournful tone from creeping into my voice.

“Why do you say it’s the end?” Beth asked, her brow furrowing the same as her father's would when logic seemed to run out.

“I hurt him and he hurt me.” I shrugged. “And for once, his part was actually accidental whereas I broke his heart to save my daughter.”

“As bizarre as this feels to tell you, I think you need to give my dad a little more credit,” Beth chuckled softly. I cocked my brow at her and she elaborated, “I just mean- I talked to him the night Ryan died, about you. About what this thing is between you two. I think you need to talk to him, sort this stuff out and see if you can’t move past your pain.”

“If Rick had anything he wanted to say to me, he would’ve already. He’s not exactly a beat around the bush kind of guy,” I told her flatly, returning my gaze to the TV.

“Dad also doesn’t do emotions,” Beth reminded me gently, “When you’re ready, just try talking to him, okay?”

I nodded softly, as Beth stood up and thanked me before leaving the room. I stared into the TV as I considered her words, finding them to be the most obvious path but I couldn’t will myself off of the bed to go confront my issues. I’d had enough of confronting issues in the past two weeks to last me a lifetime and I just wasn’t eager to run off and go fight some more. I rolled over, tucking my blanket under my chin as I curled up into a ball and the haze of exhaustion flooded over me immediately. The dulcet sound of the TV lulled me to sleep and I didn’t even bother trying to fight it.

+Down With The Rickness - Ch1: Such Small Hands+

[comicteaparty]

February 24th-March 1st, 2020 CTP Archive

The archive for the Comic Tea Party week long chat that occurred from February 24th, 2020 to March 1st, 2020.  The chat focused on Whispers of the Past by Crona J.

Featured Comment:

Chat:

Comic Tea Party

BOOK CLUB START!

Hello and welcome everyone to Comic Tea Party’s Book Club~! This week we’ll be focusing on Whispers of the Past by Crona J.~! (https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/whispers-of-the-past/list?title_no=191366)

You are free to read and comment about the comic all week at your own pace until March 1st, so stop on by whenever it suits your schedule! Discussions are freeform, but we do offer discussion prompts in the pins for those who’d like to have them. Additionally, remember that while constructive criticism is allowed, our focus is to have fun and appreciate the comic! Whether you finish the comic or can only read a few pages, everyone is welcome to join and chat with us!

DISCUSSION PROMPTS – PART 1

1. What did you like about the beginning of the comic?

2. What has been your favorite moment in the comic (so far)?

3. Who is your favorite character?

4. Which characters do like seeing interact the most?

5. What is something you like about the art? If you have a favorite illustration, please share it!

6. What is a theme you like that the comic explores?

7. What do you like about the comic’s story or overall related content?

8. Overall, what do you think the comic’s strengths are?

Don’t feel inspired by the prompts? Feel free to discuss anything else that interested you!

FeatheryJustice

So far, first impressions, holy cow the art is amazing.

Ash🦀

1. My favorite part about the beginning was the style. It immediately drew me in how everything was lovingly rendered in color that made me feel like I was seeing the world for the first time. It made me want to paint, too! 2. When we first see the man. Whoo buddy. Whoooooooo buddy. That was... a finely sculpted painting there. I could’ve framed him and hung him on my wall if the artist would let me. WHOOOO BUDDY. 3. My favorite character so far is Martel. I don’t write them often, but I love seeing kids in media, and I love the design of her hair. I know it’s a random thing to make me like her but I just... really like her hairstyle. She’s cute, and I’d guess she’ll be a breath of much-needed light air later in the story. 4. Mystery man and Martel are precious. 5. I point to answer 2 here. That lovingly sculpted chest? My heart was a-flutter I tell you what. 6. The art style is just... SO LOVINGLY RENDERED. The quiet moments of baking bread juxtaposed against a chaotic battle was SO. GOOD. Aaaaaah Could also be that that particular part is my favorite part of making bread so it was extra special aaaaaaah 7-8 I haven’t seen enough of the story to answer these yet! But the art is banging and I can’t wait to read more. Subscribed.

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

I've read this before and the art and story aren't really my thing. Since critique is allowed I could give art comments if CronaJ would find that kind of thing helpful? But even though I won't be following the story I was still impressed by how much care the author puts into it. Both from looking at their comic and from reading their comments on this discord and on the tap forum it's clear they've put a ton of effort into the art and story, and haven't cut any corner.s And all the panels are so rendered. I wonder how long it takes to draw a page?(edited)

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

Hey everyone! I'm the artist and writer of Whispers of the Past. I want to thank you all for your kind comments and observations so far. It really means a lot to me to hear what others think of this heartfelt project. I know that the story is in the beginning stages right now. But I'm looking to post the end of the first chapter this week, so hopefully a bit more will be revealed soon. Please feel free to ask me questions about anything, or (to answer @Eightfish (Puppeteer)'s question), to offer critiques for how I can improve what I'm doing.(edited)

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

@FeatheryJustice & @Ash🦀 I'm glad you enjoy the artwork. The painting process is probably what takes me the longest when it comes to pages. In response to @Eightfish (Puppeteer)... It takes me around 30-40 hours per page, and I try to post 2-3 page updates. Obviously, the amount of time spent per page varies depending on several factors, such as: the number of panels, the level of complication of poses, how many characters/background elements there are, and sometimes just whatever weird reason my brain isn't working that day ^^; So for my average 5-7 panel pages, they typically take longer than, say, a full-page spread. @Ash🦀 I'm so happy that the first few pages pulled you in! I spent a lot of time deciding on how I wanted to draw those panels, and what style to use, etc. I actually redrew the first 3 pages at least 5 times before settling on them as they are. And, you can hang and frame the image of our male MC if you want, haha, I actually don't have prints of it, but it is something to consider That particular panel was a one-page spread, so I was able to dedicate a bit more detail to it. Maret is a worthy favorite character. She is too pure and precious, and she just wants to make friends with everybody. Even when the "strange man" is kind of curt and unfriendly to her, she wants to befriend him. Also, I am SO unbelievably glad that you picked up on the juxtaposition in the bread-making scene! Ahhhh! I had a lot of fun with that one

FeatheryJustice

1. The Pacing, I love slow starts to comics because I get to absorb it and learn more. 2. Favourite Moment? Dude trying to climb out the window and failing. That was really funny XD 3. Mysterious dude from the water of course. He has pointed ears, you know something is up. 4. I like Maret and the mysterious man, it seems like a child being like 'this is new and I want to learn more' Also thank you for not writing a grating child character. They sometimes turn up too pure to be real, or too grating because they are too real. Maret at least has that nice balance of a healthy child will not acted spoiled but still want things because child like the scene where she was shoo'ed out of the room. 5. I think we talked about htis a long time ago, but I love the way you draw hands and feet! 6. Nothing so far, not sure where the story will head so I can't answer this. 7. I like the start of the mystery and the slow ramp up. We are just getting comfortable and I'm sure we are going to get rocky soon! 8. Art, from seeing Cronaj spend so much time on it, it's freaking amazing. I can almost feel the characters come to life.

Also on a side note, I want Maret to hear from the Conch shell (As a memey joke) "Under the sea, under the sea" XD

(Mysterious man has red hair, I wouldn't be surprised he turned out to be a mermaid XD Sorry I'm just on slight crack theory mode right now. He didn't sell his voice though)

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

When I was first writing and planning this comic, I was a little scared about how slow the start was, but I'm glad that it has been interesting despite the slow nature of the exposition.

2. Favourite Moment? Dude trying to climb out the window and failing. That was really funny XD

@FeatheryJustice Accurate! He's kind of an idiot, and he panics over nothing. For Maret... I actually based her character partially off of my two younger sisters, so that might be a lot of what contributes to her personality and realism. We did talk about hands and feet before! I love drawing hands, because they are so expressive and complex, but hate drawing feet because they are complicated. But I did study from life to draw Maret's feet, because I felt like I would mess it up otherwise ^^;

Hahahaha! I could definitely make an edit of that, tbh.

FeatheryJustice

That would be a funny joke panel if you ever want to do one. XD It's like replace the diaolgue memes XD

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

And I was partially making a mermaid joke when I had the reference to mermaids in the comic because he is a redhead

Definitely an idea....

I would title the episode "Whispers of the Crack"

FeatheryJustice

OMG YES I would love to see that XD

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

I have a WotP meme folder on my computer already

carcarchu

1. What did you like about the beginning of the comic? Mystery man pretty 2. What has been your favorite moment in the comic (so far)? i liked the part where maret was listening to the conch for mermaids, had a lovely magical charm to it 3. Who is your favorite character? mystery man 4. Which characters do like seeing interact the most? not too many interactions so far but maret and the mystery man were cute 5. What is something you like about the art? If you have a favorite illustration, please share it! the sunset scenery had a nice vibe

also i can see why people were saying it reminded them of ruroni kenshin, mystery guy especially with his hair up and on the cover image is reminiscent of kenshin but storywise doesn't remind me of it at all

carcarchu

I have some critiques that i'll cover in case you don't want to see them. SPOILER The anime-ish emotes (the blush and the anger vein) to me clash against the realistic artsyle and detracts from the moments, some more subtlety with them would be appreciated. And Maret doesn't really look like a child to me, her face is very mature so it makes her look older than she is. Moreover the 3 characters that have been introduced thus far have very similar facial features. For maret and agatha they are siblings so it makes sense but the mystery man is (presumably?) not related to them so i'm not sure if that's intentional. In any case more facial diversity would be appreciated going forward (if it's just your style that's fine too). And this is a really small nit-pick but the first panel of chapter 6 has horse hooves with the sfx thump thump thump. In my opinion this sfx should be clip clop clip clop END SPOILER

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

@carcarchu Thanks for the notes! I actually had a hard time deciding how to portray blush noticeably in a more realistic style, haha, but I can definitely see why it's jarring. Do you have any tips for how to depict blushing without anime emotes? I would just make it more reddish/pink, but it always looks weird to me (or too unnoticeable). As for Maret... She looks like a child to me? She's six, so she isn't quite a toddler, so I don't know if that changes your perception of her. She actually resembles my youngest sister a great deal, and my youngest sister was 5, almost six, when I designed her. (I just looked through the pages again, and there's maybe one panel that I think she looks slightly older in, so if anything, I'll try to fix that panel.) So yes, obviously Agatha and Maret look very similar, hahaha. They are biological sisters, so that makes sense. There will be at least two more characters introduced that are also related to them (and look fairly similar as well) and one character who will be mentioned who is also related and looks just like Agatha. Other than that, Izrekiel does look somewhat similar, I suppose, but it might also be partially that he canonically has a very feminine face as opposed to other male characters to be introduced later. It could be that and also a bit as a result of my style. I'm not sure. Ahhhh, sound effects! I also struggled with deciding what to do here. I wanted to do something different than "clip clop," mostly for a stupid personal hang-up. (I don't know why, but "clip clop" always looks so comical to me.) But if it helps translate the sound better, I might just have to bite the bullet and change it. Thanks for your feedback! Even if I don't agree with all of it, it does help me to take a closer look at what I've done with some different eyes. (edited)

carcarchu

That's fair! You don't have to accept anything just my thoughts (i hope nothing i said was too harsh) for me thump thump is a dull sound whereas clip clop or clippity clop is a sharper and harsher sound

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

yeah, I think you're right about that

thump is more like a heartbeat

or someone falling on carpet or something

carcarchu

and as for the blush question i think there are ways to depict a similar emotion without relying on the blush itself as a short hand like the softening of the eyes, the shape of the eyebrows, looking down and heck even body language can help with this. expression is more than what is shown on just the face

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

Thank you. I always feel like my characters look too stiff, like mannequins. ^^; I'm probably not going to completely redraw any old panels at this point, but I might make a few alterations to these panels to make it more consistent with later panels down the line.

carcarchu

i also noticed that a lot of your panels are the characters looking straight towards the "camera" and i would appreciate more varied angles and perspectives

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

Particularly with the first ten pages, that is certainly true

I got that note before, but I didn't redraw every panel, only some which looked particularly bad.

carcarchu

personally i never edit old chapters unless i 1. forgot to draw something important 2. there's a huge typo 3. it's missing a panel

any critique you can just keep in your heart and implement if you choose to do so moving forward

keii'ii (Heart of Keol)

2. I really liked "what if it's mama?" - a lot of hints condensed there: family history, how the topic of deaths/ disappearances are handled around children (either in that family specifically, or in that culture), and also a moment that shows a glimpse of Agatha's sisterly love instead of having the readers assume it.

snuffysam (Super Galaxy Knights)

Really loving the comic so far! Right now, I'm most interested to learn about this family situation. I'm guessing their mother is dead or missing, but what about their father? I suppose his clothes were still in the house so maybe he just went out? Or maybe they're both missing and it was just fairly recent?

Also, the paint-y style of this comic is just incredible

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

https://media.tenor.com/images/878a64d90a1139bcb1e863ee29bfa929/tenor.gif

I'm so happy that you guys picked up on the clues about their mother. It alludes to some pretty plot heavy stuff that very few people have really commented on so far.

eli [a winged tale]

Oooh I’m so excited for your story Cronaj! Here are my answers~ 1) I love the beach scene! Maret with the shell is adorable and you established their relationship right away 2) Fav moment is probably the scene transition to our lad waking up with Agatha going about her day. It’s very peaceful and I’m a sucker for slice of life stuff. 3) Can’t pick just yet~ I like Agatha as a solid protagonist though. 4) More Agatha x mystery man please 5) I loooove the illustration aesthetics. Bold colours! 6) haven’t gotten to the core theme yet I’m sure but first impressions/meeting are always exciting. 7) I’m excited for what is to come. Can’t wait for the call to adventure. 8) Strength is definitely the art - beautiful and bold. Keep up the wonderful work!

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

@eli [a winged tale] Woah!!! You're the first person I've heard say that they like Agatha! She's mah girl! (And don't you worry, there will definitely be a lot more Agatha x Mystery Man ) Thanks for participating

eli [a winged tale]

she’s a solid sister!

sagaholmgaard

1. What did you like about the beginning of the comic? I like how the intro had a nice balance between art and text. Usually if there’s a lot of text on the first page I can get deterred from heading a comic, but here I think it worked really well! And the loverly painting of the ocean sunset also reeled me in and fit really well with the poetic text! 2. What has been your favorite moment in the comic (so far)? ”He’s the prettiest man I’ve ever seen!” LOL (and she’s right too…) 3. Who is your favorite character? I like the kid! But I’m excited to learn more about the other characters as the story goes on! 4. Which characters do like seeing interact the most?
I liked Agatha and Mystery Man interacting, it felt very natural and I’m curious to see what comes of it. But the dialogue felt pretty strong which I gotta applaud 5. What is something you like about the art? If you have a favorite illustration, please share it! The beautiful shot of Mystery Man on the beach of course, lol! I love the way the hair is rendered, it really feels like it’s has weight and is spread out in the sand, if that makes sense? 6. What is a theme you like that the comic explores? It seems like it will explore a lot of interesting themes in the future, such as grief and finding where you belong, so again I’m interested to see what the story brings! I’m sure it’ll be good no matter what :D Overall I like what I’ve read so far! It’s not the type of art style I usually gravitate towards, but I can tell a lot of love is going into rendering and I think we’ll be seeing Crona’s art improve a lot as the story goes on, which is always exciting to see!

RebelVampire

What I like about the beginning of the comic, which also goes for what I like about the art in general, is the attention to detail in the background colors and lighting. I've never seen such a beautifully rendered (what I assume is) a sunset. It really makes everything have this great almost mystical atmosphere to it. In general, though, the art so far is definitely the comic's strength because you can see the sheer passion in every drop of it. My favorite moment so far is when Maret gives Izrekiel some flowers and then drags him off and he's just meekly protesting. It was both cute and comedic and the preciousness hurt my heart. This is also why this is my favorite pair of characters interacting so far. I think the age gap combined with the context of Izrekiel's situation is gonna lead to lots of awkwardness that I look forward to. As for fave character, though, I would have to go with Agatha right now. I don't know what it is about her, but everytime I see her I feel like I'm looking at an old soul. Like maybe someone who still has a lot to learn about the world, but is wise beyond her years in other regards. And it makes her a captivating character for me.

While I'm not sure if this will be an overall theme throughout, I like that the comic starts to deal with the theme of loss and hope. On one side you have Agatha who just kind of accepts loss and deals with it, and then you have Maret who just lives on in hope. And I kind of feel they represent two dynamic sides to the issue about whether its better to cling to hope or just move on and deal and how both can be harmful if not expressed in the correct way. As for overall story content, while we're not that deep in, I do like it starts with a multitude of mysteries cause mysteries are always great for making ppl want answers

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Since Crona said they were good with art critique: The main thing I noticed when I first saw the art was that, though lovingly rendered, the characters' faces and bodies are kind of stiff. They don't really scrunch up their eyes and faces when they emote- it's mostly just the eyebrows (this was especially noticable when Maret was crying, or on the latest page, first panel, where Agatha's face doesn't really match her body language or words). And characters often don't seem to twist their bodies as much as they should. Oh- also the same camera angles of faces and bodies are repeated a lot. Front, 3/4, and profile. It'd be cool to see some shots with foreshortening from above or below the characters. Also the lighting is pretty diffuse- the characters seem to be shaded about the same way, and with the same colors, regardless of the lighting situation. I can still tell where the light is coming from, because there are those strong bright highlights in the direction of the light, but other than the bright highlights everything else seems to be shaded as if there was another light source coming from straight ahead. Also, sometimes characters seem to lose their shadows? Like on this page https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/whispers-of-the-past/ch-1-what-the-waves-left-behind-pt-3/viewer?title_no=191366&episode_no=4 where Agatha doesn't cast a shadow on the man, or this page https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/whispers-of-the-past/ch-1-what-the-waves-left-behind-pt-8/viewer?title_no=191366&episode_no=10 where they're running.

Those things being said though, I was still very impressed by the sheer amount of effort put into this comic. 100 hours/ update is absolutely insane. And you pay so much attention to the inanimate objects of this world. It makes the story feel grounded. About what someone else said: I agree that the cartoonish blush looks out of place. But I disagree about Maret- I think she does look like a child. 5. Favorite illustration? Definitely Agatha's hands when making dough. Not a critique but just a question: I was confused on the location of the story. Where is this?

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

Ooof. Finally got a chance to sit down and respond to all these comments. I keep rereading them over and over again, so thank you so much for sharing your thoughts everyone! I've noticed a few themes with what people have commented so far: Maret is most people's favorite character, the panel of Izrekiel on the beach is also very popular, and the theme of loss/grief is apparent to the readers (which I'm very happy about.)

@sagaholmgaard I'm glad that you mentioned the theme of "finding where you belong" too, because it is and will be a very prevalent theme in the comic. And reading your comment about how the dialogue seems natural made my day. I used to worry about how the dialogue came off constantly, and to hear that it's strong is so encouraging.

@RebelVampire As is expected, your comments are very thought-out. The interaction between Izrekiel and Maret after he falls from the window is one of my favorite moments so far as well. I'm happy that Izrekiel's behavior came off as meek in this scene, because that is one of the defining traits of his personality. I'm glad for another Agatha fan! She is such a fun (and difficult) character for me to portray. There are so many layers about her that even I am still discovering. She is definitely an old soul, and he experiences growing up have definitely matured her beyond her years. As I mentioned before, the theme of loss is definitely a major theme of the comic overall. And hope as well, since I think the two are very connected.

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

@Eightfish (Puppeteer) Thank you for offering your critiques! Character stiffness is definitely one of my major problems that I'm working at. I definitely see what you mean about Agatha's face in the latest update. Her eyebrows look painted on (pun not intended). I have been looking forward to having some more dynamic poses, especially foreshortening, but I do find it somewhat difficult when most of what the characters are doing so far are standing, sitting, talking, and maybe doing something with their hands. ^^; Hopefully, in the future, when more "action" happens, it will be easier to do this. As for bird's eye or worm's eye shots, I'm not gonna lie, I struggle with them so much. I had two bird's eye panels, and those took so much time, and I still don't know how I feel about them. If you have any tips for exercises, I would be so grateful. (Finding reference isn't always possible.) I also would love some tips/resources on how to get better at lighting. Again, lighting reference isn't always possible for specific panels, so it would help me a lot to learn how light works in general. OOOOOOF! I don't know how I missed the lack of shadow on Izrekiel in that panel. That was 100% a stupid oversight on my part. The scene with Agatha making dough had some of my personal favorite illustrations for a while. :) Also, your question about the location, I'm not entirely sure how to answer it?(edited)

It's a high fantasy story, so the location is entirely fictional.

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

The best I can answer that is to say that the story takes place in a country called Shai-Ryam, consisting of four major "districts" in a semi-tropical temperate peninsula called "The Aka Peninsula," named after the native people who originally lived there. As of right now, they are in a city called Gon Atam, a seaside village on the western shore of the Nuata District, near the Ocean of Saturuna. It is a city heavy in trade and with a long history, yet quaint and small due to a disaster several hundred years ago. It is only now being repopulated.

Comic Tea Party

DISCUSSION PROMPTS – PART 2

9. Where do you think Izrekiel comes from, and what is his past history that seems to haunt him? Additionally, how do you think he wound up with amnesia and seemingly abandoned by the sea?

10. How will Izrekiel’s past history affect events of the story? In particular, how will revelations about his past affect his relationship with Agatha and other characters?

11. How do you think Agatha’s life will change from her encounter with Izrekiel? Will it somehow lead her to a more exciting life? If so, will it make her miss her simpler life with her family?

12. What are the biggest questions you have so far and are hoping to see answered over the course of the story? Also, what do you think will happen in the story in general?

Don’t feel inspired by the prompts? Feel free to discuss anything else that interested you!

Ash🦀

9. Okay, so, here’s my theory. Just a guess. So Izrekiel is from a very war-friendly people up north who need land. Izzy just isn’t all about that life, but feels like he has no choice. Then he gets hurt fighting someone close to him (I’m putting money on brother or cousin who lives on the “wrong” side of things, hurt because he just couldn’t fight them at full strength. And then he realizes he can’t do it, while on the ship bound for new fight zones. His captain gets wind of it and is like “oh no I can’t let Mutiny Happen” so HeS all long ike “either fall in line or get off my ship” and Izzy is like “no I don’t wanna fight anymore heck you guys” and the captain proceeds to yeet him off the ship, leading him to the island, which, unbeknownst to him, is the next target. That’s my guess. Might be wildly off. He might be part mermaid. (Merman? Is mermaid gender neutral?) 10. Izzy or his bros probably killed one of Agatha’s family members, possibly the mom? Possibly violently? Which is why she never told babygirl what’s up. It’s probably going to be remembered in the buds of their relationship, hes going to try to hide it but it’ll come to light and she’s gonna be like “Izzy I hate you” and it’s going to make me cry. 11. She’s going to have a bread making partner in the end. They’re going to have adventures and go back to a domestic bread making existence, I speak it into being now /smacks table That may just be what I want to happen, though, as I very much enjoy bread making and wish others the same simple joy of giving dough a good smacking. 12. IS THE MOTHER REALLY A MERMAID OR WHAT Is Agatha a mermaid Are they like Selkies where they can come onto land a little Is babygirl a mermaid too(edited)

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

Omg... I love reading these theories. I won't say you're wrong or right, but this is a riot. I'm thoroughly enjoying this.

FeatheryJustice

9. Pulls out my Crack Theory brain Okay, so Iz is actually not a very hot man, but actually a really hot princess, transformed into a man since she was exciled from her country but their rules are to give the exiled a new life so they shape shift them into something else. Iz got shifted into a man, and the lovely wide bare chest was because their top was lost to the ocean like how someone would lose their bathing suit top to the sea. Anyways, knowing nothing about themselves, Iz now lives their life as a man never remembering they were a princess in the first place. Ends Crack Theory 10. Don't know, can't say for now. 11. She could always politely kick him out later, so I can't say for now. XD 12. I want to know if there are monsters in this story or just like different species warring it out.

RT|NitghVision

^ I like this theory

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

@Cronaj (Whispers of the Past) Oh! I missed that it was high fantasy. I thought the story was historical fiction. No wonder mystery man has pointed ears. I was so confused- I kept thinking, oh, she looks Polynesian and lives by the ocean. But wait, her name is Agatha and she makes bread? And the houses look Japanese? What culture are her clothes from? The world being completely fictional explains all that. I think I was confused by the real names in a high fantasy story- you don't really see that a lot. Finding the right reference for lighting or pose is impossible for me. I have no tips. The only way I've found is to make my own references. I will sit in front of a window, or take a lamp into a dark room or something, and prop my phone up and take photos of myself in the poses and lighting direction I need. But hey, at least that way I don't have to worry about stealing someone else's work?

(i also like feathery's theory)

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

@FeatheryJustice Crack theories are best theories.

@Eightfish (Puppeteer) Oh! I had no idea you thought it was historical fiction No wonder you were confused! There's a lot of weird cultural-mixing shenanigans going on in the setting, and it's a bit confusing.

I should try that, for now the lighting has been primarily sunlight, or diffused sunlight (which I don't think I depicted correctly).

RebelVampire

Time to crack story theory. I don't know enough about the world to guess a name to where Izrekiel is from. However, wherever it's from, I get the impression its embroiled in a bloody war that is suffering heavy casualties. I imagine that Izrekiel mightve been in a battle and just wound up in the sea by circumstance - like maybe was taken as a prisoner of war and jumped overboard to escape. Something like that. As for the amnesia, well, Imma chock that up to PTSD cause the brief flashbacks we got don't look pleasant. However, I definitely think someone will come looking for him, and that these someone's will make trouble with the people he's just met - perhaps even forcing them to abandon their home with people in pursuit. And I'm sure as Izrekiel remembers more, others are going to really view him as potentially dangerous and blame him (but then get over it cause he's pretty O_O) Given that, I do think Agatha is gonna leave home because of Izrekiel's past running after them. I do think she's inevitably gonna miss the simpler life. Not to the point she won't rise to the challenge, but to the point that she's gonna be like "wait theres danger out here and i didnt even get a sword from an old man in a cave!" As for biggest questions, right now I'm just kind of hoping to see more of the world cause current world events really are gonna dictate a lot where the story could go.

Eightfish (Puppeteer)

Dude I was literally googling the names to see what country they were from because I thought they were from some obscure real island with a history of cultural mixing that I hadn't heard about before.

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

Hahaha! Yeah, Agatha is an English name. Maret and Kelan (a character that hasn't been introduced yet) are Irish names. Aalia (another character that isn't introduced yet) is an Arabic name. Kehhasan (another character) is a made-up name. Izrekiel is a made-up name inspired by the biblical names Israel and Ezekiel (although technically it is often spelled in their alphabet as "Isarikieru," which has a particular meaning and pronunciation in an even older—fictional—language). Ryukou (another character), is a real-ish name, based off of the Japanese names "Ryu" and "Kou," which mean "dragon" and "peace/light" respectively. Four other characters have fictional names: Ia, Tammamori, Soro, Ghita (although technically it's a Greek name, that wasn't my inspiration). And of course there are hundreds of side characters with a combination of weird names and name origins.

Comic Tea Party

DISCUSSION PROMPTS – PART 3

13. What are you most looking forward to seeing in regards to the comic?

14. Any final words of encouragement for the comic?

Don’t feel inspired by the prompts? Feel free to discuss anything else that interested you!

Deo101 [Millennium]

So! I don't really do so well with answering questions, but I do want to say it's inspiring to me to see just how much WORK is put into this comic. It's really lovely to see so clearly how much you care for it. Just want to give some general words of encouragement, keep it up!

Ash🦀

I’m most looking forward to seeing more of Izzy how the story develops along with your painting. There are so many hints and peeks at the world, and I can’t really guess where it’s going. I feel like I already care for these characters, and I can’t wait to see their journey. I am also not good at encouragement, as generally I’m fueled by spite. But I just wanted to say, keep going! You got this! We believe in you!

eli [a winged tale]

Keep up the good work Cronaj! Your art is beautiful and I can’t wait till we start rolling into act 2!

FeatheryJustice

I'm excited to see what else comes up next!

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

Thanks for all the kind words and encouragement everyone! I'm so happy to know that you are enjoying the story so far!

RebelVampire

I'm most looking to learning a bit more about the world structure I think. Since I think current events are really gonna hint at a lot what's going on. As for final words, this is an artistically wonderful comic with a lot of love put in, and I can only imagine how things will improve in the future!

snuffysam (Super Galaxy Knights)

I'm just really looking forward to seeing these characters grow! This is a beautiful comic, and I can't wait to get more of it!

Cronaj (Whispers of the Past)

Before the book club ends, I just wanted to pop back in and say thank you to everyone for their participation. Your kindness, insight, and critiques will stay with me for years to come. I'm so happy to have found a supportive community of readers and fellow creators!

Comic Tea Party

BOOK CLUB END!

Thank you everyone so much for reading and chatting about Whispers of the Past this week! Please also give a special thank you to Crona J. for volunteering the comic and creating it! If you liked Whispers of the Past, make sure to continue to support it via some of the links below!

Read and Comment: https://www.webtoons.com/en/challenge/whispers-of-the-past/list?title_no=191366

Crona J.’s Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cronasonlyfriend

Crona J.’s Ko-Fi: https://ko-fi.com/cronaj

Crona J.’s Twitter: https://twitter.com/CronajArt

[magicalgirlfumiko]

2. An early OC I remember making

I am a loser nerd that has been on the RP scene since 2006 in various means. It really wasn’t until 2009 that I can say that I established a strong world setting and character feel. So I’ll just post two of my main characters from a science fantasy thing I should be writing on as a book but I don’t feel like it:

"We all have to endure crap. No matter the form it takes, no matter what species you may be, hardships come with the territory."

"When it all comes down to it, I'm just a brat who, having spent most of her life doing for others, just wants to live her own life and make her own choices and mistakes. WHO JUST WANTS TO HAVE FUN!"

"There are times I feel if I were to vocalize what really went through my head at times people would look at me much differently. With either awe or disgust or a combination of both. Heh."

"The biggest thing I've ever wanted out of life is to become a strong, ever-evolving person who is more than capable of following her curiosity, exploring and meeting head on whatever comes her way. I definitely have the fire inside of me to do so, but until recently...what I realize what I lacked most is a specific focus for all that energy."

GENERAL CHARACTER STATISTICS

Character Name: Skie JungbluthName Meaning: Simply from the English word sky, which was taken from the old Norse word for “cloud.”Alias: NoneGender: FemaleClan: AetherAge: 24B-Day: March 21Zodiac Sign: AriesPlace of Birth: Eternium, Zeledin

Current Residence: The airship, Ethereal (she did not wish to name it that. Skie lost a bet with her boyfriend Mel. It marks the only time she has ever lost one). Skie is almost always on her custom airship which serves as her main home since her 'assignments' take her all over the known world. As a result, most of Skie's work takes place on her ship.

Occupation: Smuggler, Aryeh's mentor. Professional Gambler.

School/Grade: Finished College

Family: Joshua Jungbluth (Father), Lassilsa Jungbluth (Mother), Bill Jungbluth (Brother)

Gemstone: Diamond

PHYSICAL CHARACTERISTICS

Height: 167.64 cm

Hair: She has brown hair. Her curls help to soften her square face shape, while the long side-swept bangs bring the focus to those piercing yellow eyes. Skie keeps her hair shoulder length or just a little below. Before she became a smuggler, she often wore her hair long and flowing just like her mother but has shortened it to be look less like a kid in her mind's eye.

Eyes: Yellow and catlike. The reason for this is because of her usage of arcane magic. Unlike Rane, who used external energy from others, Skie is attempting the same kind of mysteries but at the cost to her own body.

Distinguishing Marks: None

General Appearance: Skie’s eyes are usually sharp, alert and often almond shaped. She typically flushes when she feels excited. When Skie hears good news, red color will flood her face. Angry: You can always tell when she is truly angry because she will turn quite red. She also flushes when she is embarrassed or when she over exerts herself such as when exercising. She is handsome and she knows it. Skie is powerfully built but still has a womanly body.

General Clothing: Skie likes to dress classy but comfortably. Her normal wears are a white button shirt, a brown waist length jacket, black slacks, and sometimes a tie. In colder weather, she wears her father’s old brown leather trench coat which is held shut by short leather tabs.

Strengths: Skie is very adept with Aether magic. This is the power from WITHIN. It is based upon the soul, the powers that are deep within the essence of who you are. The lesser known of the styles, Aether powers are often channeled through emotions and desires.

As a swordsman, Skie's abilities are lackluster; however, those around her have noted that her fighting style, however unrefined, is heavy hitting and vicious. As it turns out, Skie's style and progress mirror that of her father.

Weaknesses: The weakness of her magical style is that it comes completely from her own body, so if she is injured or drugged or unconscious, those powers can be interrupted. It is also based upon strong desires, so her emotions must be in tune with what she wants. One of the fundamental issues with her is that she literally has a well of power inside herself. She has to constantly use magic to prevent too much from building up inside her at once.

Skie is prone to have headaches, particularly migraines, and depression because of these powers.

More: Weight: 51 kg, Breast: 81 cm, Waist: 53 cm, Hips: 84 cm

MENTAL CHARACTERISTICS

Allies: Mel and Aryeh. Skie is a good friend, she always looks out for her friends with caring and generosity and will protect them should the need arise and encourage them with her natural optimism.

Enemies: Medus and the Yellow Brother's are her main rivals, but Rane is the bigger danger.

Current Goal/Purpose: She is sent out to find Medus by her brother. He has promised her a lot of money to do so.

Aspirations: She wants to succeed where others have failed. Skie wants to explore the world, change it to fit her whims and do her best at life.

Hobbies: Skie likes activities that involve mobility and less concentration like war games, fast sports, motor racing, gambling, and vibrant music. However, she also likes to grill and come up with meals.

Likes: Action, Coming in first, Challenges, Championing Causes, and Spontaneity

Dislikes: Waiting Around, Admitting Failure, No opposition, Tyranny, other people’s advice

Talents: She’s skilled at games of chance. Skie is also skilled with fixing up and redesigning airships.

Inabilities: Selfish and quick-tempered, Impulsive and impatient, Foolhardy and daredevil, if confronted, Skie can turn to be quite childish; she will fight back with her aggressive nature.

Fears: Feeling that her identity is threatened. Self-preservation is a primal instinct and goal for her.

General Personality: Skie loves to explore new ground. She reminds her friends that every moment is new and that life is about experimentation and discovery. It is through experiences that we develop and mature. We are here to advance our soul growth. We are not here to find a static, comfortable situation. We are here to go for the gold and to answer the call of our soul. We are engaged in an on-going process to release our resistance and to transmute all forms of fear into courage and compassion.

Skie is a courageous leader with a genuine concern for those she commands. Being a responsible lady, it is rare that she will use her subordinates to obtain her own objectives as a leader, but occasionally it does happen. She does not make a very good follower because she is too "taking charge".

Skie may be unwilling to obey or submit to directions for which she can see no reason, or with which she disagrees. She is much concerned with self, both positively and negatively - self-reliant but also self centered (sometimes) and concerned with her own personal advancement and physical satisfaction. Her immense energy makes her aggressive and restless, argumentative occasionally, headstrong, quick tempered, easily offended and capable of holding grudges if she feels affronted.

Skie is intellectual and objective, but can be in rare situations bigoted and extremist in politics. She is a champion of lost causes and last-ditch resistance.

Inner Personality: Skie is quick-witted but sometimes foolhardy and over-optimistic, lacking thoroughness and the ability to evaluate difficulties regarding the undertakings into which she often rushes impulsively. The great need of Skie is to exercise an iron self-control, to discipline the qualities and tendencies of her character to the advantage, not the detriment, of the society in which she moves.

Fondest Memory: Winning all the money out of the casinos that are present in Eternium.

Biggest Regret: None so far, she has lived a pretty good life so far and rarely decides to focus on the past.

Secret: She also loves the color pink.

SPECIALTY CHARACTERISTICS

Special Items: The Ivory Cross that Skie wears. It is the symbol used on Chenoan flags. This is used to show her support of the Chenoan cause against Rane.

Magic: Aether Lightning, Skie’s only usable combat spell as an arcane magus. Raw Aether magic arcs from her hands as lightning allowing limited ranged combat capabilities.

HISTORIC BACKGROUND

General History: Skie's upbringing was fairly typical for an upper middle class family in post-war Zeledin. After the Zeledin War, her father stayed out of the limelight. While Joshua was one of the founders of the Category following Rane's disappearance, he never sought a lot of personal wealth. He believed that it was better for his children to grow up modestly. When she was younger, it never crossed her mind that she’s the daughter of Joshua Jungbluth. Most of her childhood she moved around a lot since Lassilsa didn’t want to stay in the former capital of her queen. Skie and her brother didn’t get along even from this early age.

Lassilsa was her main teacher, since Joshua himself never mastered any magical abilities. Like her father, Skie’s genes were “overspecialized” with a connection to Aether. Thus, with her magical prowess in aether magic allowed her to attend the Eternium Military Academy. At age 22, she graduated with Study in Arcane magic. It was attending the school that she became close friends with Mel Rogero. They have been dating ever since.

Shortly after her graduation, Skie enlisted into the Category's AeroCorps, in Zeldin's capital city of Eternium. She wished to distance herself from the legacy of her father while enlisted, so she was made a junior officer on the CAC Drake. It was an unremarkable time for her on the airship. Her time in the military was very short. She was kicked out for being too hot headed.

At age 24, Skie left the AeroCorps and enlisted herself to be an aging bounty hunter. He gave her a new task; being a pilot and mentor figure. Her new role was to train Ary Fairwater in Arcane studies, which puzzled her. She dislikes being a teacher and doesn’t want a teen getting in her way. To this day she continues to indirectly train Ary. Though, it seems that it is Mel that does a lot of the mentoring.

Skie was recently hired by her brother to force Medus Tenpenny into the Category's Elite Unit. In response, Mel Rogero was hired to be her bodyguard by Lassie. Skie is more than aware that The Category might have plans to make Medus their trump card when they finally intervene on the war between Chenoa and Rane's forces.

Why not? One's gotta feel confident in a uniform."

"Because Skie is amazing. She has been putting in so much hard work and it payed off big time. It doesn't matter if she's not considered a "real" magus by Category standards. She is amazing as her own kinda woman."

"Once, I had a fortune told to me and usually I never take them into thought...This one I did. It said,"Greet your friends with open arms and happiness will come to you." I seriously sat there, frozen while reading it. I took it as, I should stop being so distant and accept my friends...Bring them back into my life, even if I'm not with them. I hope I can though."

"Don't you hate when you really want to say something,but don't know what?"

GENERAL CHARACTER STATISTICS

Character Name: Mel RogeroName Meaning: Mel is a pet name of Maethelwine, which means “Meeting Friend.”Alias: NoneGender: Male

Age: 25B-Day: 2/26Zodiac Sign: PiscesPlace of Birth:ChenoaCurrent Residence: Skie’s AirshipOccupation: Skie’s Body Guard. Seat of Water, Unit ZeroSchool/Grade: Finished High SchoolFamily: MJ Rogero (Sister). Other relatives not mentioned.Gemstone: Moonstone

PHYSICAL CHARACTERISTICS

Height: 180 cm (5’11”)

Hair: Mel wears his black hair (almost violet) really long, which is considered the sign of an unmarried warrior in the Moon Clan. It is kept braided by white wraps.

Eyes: Blue

Distinguishing Marks: He wears one beaded earring in his left ear.

General Appearance: Mel is a gentlemen and not sloppy in his overall appearance.

General Clothing: Mel loves the color black and wears a military inspired tunic and trousers. When not in combat, he wears a purple cape to add to the ensemble, the sign of his family. This has more to do with tradition than anything else. Since Mel is the only male son in his family, it suggests that he’ll inherit the title of his father someday. It also keeps him warm in the colder regions of Mirabella.

Strengths: Some think of him as weak because, like water, he takes the path of least resistance. But by flowing on, resisting nothing, Mel overcomes all and his freedom from self (his greatest secret strength) provides him with limitless access to imagination (his second greatest secret strength). His emotions are known to guide his heart and his mind. Mel possesses a great trait that allows him to come in contact with a variety of emotions and not pass judgment on an individual.

Weaknesses: Mel does not have many combatant spells, since he put most of his focus on using overclock and natural smarts. Mel is also very meek, while this could also be considered a merit; Mel cannot take the life of an enemy, for he is a very religious follower of the Moon Goddess.

MENTAL CHARACTERISTICS

Allies: The Category

Enemies: None.

Current Goal/Purpose: Mel is Skie’s bodyguard and boyfriend. He is a man who enjoys helping and serving others. Mel is very observant and examines each person and situation closely. He is a dreamer, which allows him to relate intimately to Skie. Mel gives to her, a certain peace and security. He always tries to avoid all possible arguments with her.

According to Ivy Veyado, Mel makes Skie more docile and convenient. He shields her against her enemies and is able to pacify her fears and give her the emotional security she needs. Mel often possesses the fiery command and gentle nature which makes a perfect blend to keep her satisfied and affectionate.

Aspirations: To help everyone he meets to the best of his ability.

Hobbies: Mel finds infinite pleasure in the simple things, like the smile of a stranger, the touch of a child, or the tweet of a bird as it feathers its nest. Mel likes telling stories, painting, cooking, watching good cinema, and collects clothes from foreign nations.

Likes: Solitude to dream in, mystery in all its guises, anything discarded to stay discarded, the ridiculous, likes to get 'lost'

Dislikes: The obvious, being criticized, feeling all at sea about something, know-it-alls, and pedantry.

Talents: Healing magics, cooking, making tea, etc.

Inabilities: Escapist and idealistic, secretive and vague. Can sometimes be bossed around by Skie.

Fears: Upheavals are abhorrent to Mel, and stay with him for days but, it is not always understood, that he absorbs all kinds of atmospheres like a sponge and, just as the power of the sea takes time to settle after a storm, so Mel needs to be allowed time and space alone, to recover his inner calm.

General Personality: Mel possesses a gentle, patient, malleable nature. He has many generous qualities and is friendly, He is good natured, kind and compassionate, sensitive to the feelings of those around him, and responds with the utmost sympathy and tact to any suffering he encounters. Mel is deservedly popular with all kinds of people, partly because his easygoing, affectionate, submissive nature offers no threat or challenge to stronger and more exuberant characters.

He accepts the people around him and the circumstances in which he finds himself rather than trying to adapt them. Mel patiently waits for problems to sort themselves out rather than take the initiative in solving them. He is more readily concerned with the problems of Skie than with his own.

His nature tends to be too otherworldly for the practical purposes of living in this world as it is. He sometimes exists emotionally rather than rationally, instinctively more than intellectually. Mel longs to be recognized as greatly creative. Any rebellion he makes against convention is personal; however, as he often times does not have the energy or motivation to battle against the Establishment.

Inner Personality: Mel has an intuitive and psychic ability more than any other character in the series. He trusts his gut feelings and if he does not, he quickly learns to because he realizes that his hunches are usually correct.

Mel’s downfall is his sensitivity and his inability to reject another person. He does not like rejection and se tries to treat others the way they want to be treated so he will rarely say no to a person for fear of hurting their feelings.

He will help another person with their problems and like to do so because making others feel good in turn makes him feel good.

His inner conflict is extremes of temperament and conflicting emotions. He wants to learn to use his powers and his imagination in a positive, productive way.

Fondest Memory: He has many. But in reality, his fondest memories always involve spending time with Skie and making sure that she is always smiling.

Biggest Regret: He has a tendency to act like a “savior” and these are a number of times in which he was not able to help everyone that he deems needed his help.

Secret: Mel loves Skie with all his heart and secretly wishes to marry her someday. She is one of the few people who have faith in his dreams. His qualities create an excitement within her and she respects Mel whole-heartedly. To him, Skie has enough fire to spark his desires and lead him to great accomplishments, and give him the faith he needs to stand for dreams and wishes. She has always fiercely defends him in the past against those who judge him inaccurately due to his dreamy nature. She brings excitement and vigor to his life and teaches him to be a bit more practical.

SPECIALTY CHARACTERISTICS

Special Items: The Purple cloak that he is often seen wearing. It is a sign that he is from a long family of knights that work for the crown family of Chenoa. While this is more of a honorary role in the present, he is still proud of his background.

Weapons: A blade for back-up. Mel is a technical pacifist; meaning he is willing to beat people up as much as he wants. He may even get a few fatalities through. However, once it comes down to a choice between killing and not an opponent, Mel will not kill. He uses his sword in non-lethal ways to defeat his foes and to defend Skie.

Whip of the Rip Tide: A whip forged from the strongest batch of ather ever found thus far, it is a Class A weapon that is capable of causing major flooding and water spouts. It is a highly dangerous weapon that only Mel can wield with proper effect. It can also be used as a normal whip or lasso.

Magic: Mel’s magic is focused on using Overclock as his main area of study. In this case, he can separate the processes of his brain and excels at multitasking on things like paperwork and cooking. This is how he is able to use his sword effectively.

Mel does have access to using the powers of Dark Flames, which are a purple flames that extend from his palms and quickly engulfs foes in a cold binding chain. Mel’s other magic includes portal openings and displacements of weapons.

The common belief is that no one can best Mel in non-lethal combat.

HISTORIC BACKGROUND

General History: Mel is the youngest child in his family. His mother went out of her way to spoil him and make sure he excelled at something other than the normal soldiery activities of the Rogero family. Though, in the end he still chose the mantle of being a knight.

Being a member of Chenoa’s court, he had access to many of the best schools in the nation. There Mel learned all the trades to be a Knight in the royal court. However, he soon decided that he’d be better off working within the Category, since Chenoa didn’t have all the fun of the modern world like Zeldin did.

After finishing up his basic schooling, he went on to the Military Academy. During his time off, Mel would wander around the city day dreaming. It was on one of these walks that he first met Skie following one of her storming off from her barracks. She was a very different girl from the ones in Chenoa. One could almost say that she was exotic to him. .

Mel would then become an acquaintance of Lassi, Skie’s mother. Lassi’s goal was to attempt to get them to become a couple. Her greatest fear is that Skie will die a soldier. When Skie left the military, Lassi requested that her daughter be barred from Unit Zero. Skie was then recommended to become a mentor, a job not suited for her fiery spirit. Knowing that her daughter might try to run off and doing something foolish, Lassi has hired Mel to be her bodyguard. Mel was more than happy to take the assignment. While still very shy to Skie, they have known each other for a long enough time that he feels that he can get closer to her this way.