#hime's fanfics

[himeofshyness]

Aleia groaned as Sebastian's hands began to wander under her shirt. "It's literally early in the morning, and you have to be "that" excited right now?"

Sebastian chuckled, his breath warm against her neck. "Can you blame me when I wake up next to you looking so... inviting."

I think I forgot to turn off the Spicy Version for this mod. This is based around these dialogues and I think its from Maggs Immersive Sebastian mod.

AYOOOOOOO SEBBY! 👀‼️

Pffftt and there's my character Aleia being dramatic. 🤭

[imnotanonymus]

Hi, I'm back once more, this time specifically to ask if anyone has watched the show Akagami No Shirayuki Hime. If you have interact, I'm writing a fic for it, ObixShirayuki mainly. I just want to find people interested.

[roro-apple12]

[himetarts]

so there's a Sterling fanfic that's been living in my head rent free lately (I'm going insane)

[tuliharja]

Fanikanta: Bleach & Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle

Luokitus: Sopii kaikille

Genre: Romantiikka

Luvut: 1/1

Tiivistelmä: Kuchiki Byakuya ei ehkä puhu paljon, mutta näkee sitäkin enemmän. Joskus vain yksi sana riittää kertomaan kaiken.

Huomautus: Tämä ficci löytyy myös fanfiction.net:stä samalla nimellä.

[koviah]

The Crimson Lion

[Read on AO3]

The flickering candlelight danced upon the polished marble floors, casting a warm and inviting glow in the grand hall of Tanbarun Castle. Tense whispers could be heard from the staff as they rushed to complete their duties, ensuring that everything was perfect for the arrival of their esteemed guest.

A mixture of fear and determination swelled within her; she wasn’t sure how she was going to accomplish it, or how long it was going to take, but she vowed to find a way out of this predicament.

She belonged to no one.

or; If Shirayuki was captured by the royal guards before escaping Tanbarun. [Eventual ObiYuki] Notes:

An overwhelming Thank You to Kaedix for beta reading for me. Many apologies to Meefy for the shenanigans against your boy Raji.

Chapter 1: Beauty Bound and Besieged

Shirayuki had woken up that morning in a quaint herbal shop she called home. She had an early start that morning as she ventured out into the lush landscapes behind her house to forage, excited to get a good start to the day. She had traveled to her usual spots, plucking only enough to restock her supplies and to fulfill the orders she was expecting from her repeat clients, ensuring that she didn’t disrupt the flora and fauna enough to halt any growth.

She was running low on her tonics, but should be fine to fulfill her orders for today without issue while her new jars simmered overnight. The lavender she grabbed today would even be perfect for nearly a full restock, while still taking care of the sweet elderly woman next door for her sleep aides. The birds chirping above her blended in with the sound of glass chiming together in her bag with each step.

The tranquility was shattered when she walked back into the shop and was surprised by the appearance of royal guards.

"By the order of the first prince of Tanbarun, Lord Raji, you are to come with us," the leader of the guards declared, his voice carrying a weight that offered no refusal. Her instincts told her that resistance would only lead to trouble, but even still she placed her hands on her hips and held her head high.

"I haven't done anything wrong," she protested, her voice steady despite her inner turmoil. "Why am I being taken?"

The guard's gaze flickered to her fiery hair, his expression a blend of fascination and something more sinister, as if he were truly enjoying the moment. "Your hair, miss. It is requested by Prince Raji. He desires a woman of unparalleled beauty, and you fit the bill."

A chill ran down Shirayuki's spine. This was a nightmare she hadn't seen coming, but she should have. It had been so long since she had had an issue with her hair that she had become careless and comfortable.

As the guards began to close in on her, Shirayuki knew she had to act.

Without hesitation, she reached out to grab a bottle off the shelf on the wall next to her. "Sorry, emergency restocking!" Shirayuki exclaimed, throwing the crushed powder at their feet to create an opaque cloud in the center of the room. "Gotta run!" Seizing the moment, she sprinted towards the back door.

It wouldn’t take her long to get to the forest, and once there she was sure she could evade them. Her familiarity with the terrain would give her an advantage in hiding from them with their noisy shuffling armor. Her heart pounded in her chest as she slammed her upper body into the back door.

Eyes focused and facing forward, she missed the man waiting for her by the door. Before she realized the hitch in her plan someone grabbed her upper arm and held her back, her feet slipping out from under her from the loss of momentum.

“Look, we can do this the easy way, or the hard way. Regardless of which you choose, you will be coming with us.”

The marketplace seemed to blur around her as she was led through the lively streets and towards Tanbarun Castle. The people bustling around the road parted for the royal cavalcade, the nosy ones trying to get a peak at the person at the center. This wasn’t the first time her hair had gotten her into trouble of course, but it might have become the most severe situation yet. A mixture of fear and determination swelled within her; she wasn’t sure how she was going to accomplish it, or how long it was going to take, but she vowed to find a way out of this predicament.

She belonged to no one.

The flickering candlelight danced upon the polished marble floors, casting a warm and inviting glow in the grand hall of Tanbarun Castle. Tense whispers could be heard from the staff as they rushed to complete their duties, ensuring that everything was perfect for the arrival of their esteemed guest.

The courtyard buzzed as Shirayuki was ushered onto the grounds and into her chambers. The door was shut tight, the clicking of a key locking up the door behind her echoing in her ears. The grandeur of the suite was overwhelming, from the intricately carved furniture to the billowing silky curtains blowing into the room to remind her of her station.

A small group of maids stood ready on the far wall, their expressions a mix of curiosity and polite duty. Among them was a woman a few years older than the rest, dark hair pulled tight into a bun, a gentle smile on her face.

“Lady Shirayuki, I am Selene,” She introduced herself.

“We have been tasked with preparing you for your meeting with Prince Raji.”

No words came to her. She simply nodded in acknowledgment as she moved to take in her immediate surroundings. Her gaze swept over the multitudes of jewels, toiletries and garments arranged out for her on the nearby surfaces. This room alone held more value than she had ever seen in one place, and the thought that it was meant to be for her made her sick to her stomach.

With practiced efficiency, the maids encouraged Shirayuki into another room with gentle hands and soft chittering. The young women attempted to help Shirayuki disrobe, but she held out a hand to distance herself from them. Shaky hands completed the task as she kept her eyes down. Her initial discomfort gradually gave way to resignation as she lowered into the warm water. A mixture of fragrant oils and flower petals caressed her skin as she closed her eyes, willing the moments to pass quickly.

Once the spongebath was complete, Selene led her to a dressing area where a gown of deep emerald green silk waited for her. The maids worked in harmony as they laced up the back of her dress quickly and quietly, pulling the material tight to her form.

Next she was ushered to a soft stool in front of a vanity, where Selene herself applied her makeup. A soft rose hue to her lips, her cheeks, and a subtle touch of dark coal to accentuate her eyes.

It didn’t take long for Shirayuki to lift a hand to rub at her eyes, but Selene gently tapped her wrist in disapproval before correcting any smudges that may have occurred.

Her hair was long, halfway down her back at least. So long that it took three women with towels to get it dry enough to style it as jewels were placed on her neck and wrists. Her bangs were left alone, along with the slightly longer tendrils that framed her face. The remainder was done in two braids that trailed her hairline back with the remainder put into a low bun.

"You truly are a vision, Miss Shirayuki," Selene complimented with a warm smile. "The gown suits you perfectly."

"Thank you, Selene," Shirayuki replied, trying to hide her discomfort with the tight material as she ran her hands down to smooth it out.

"Now, shall we proceed to the grand hall, where Prince Raji awaits?"

Is this really happening? I can't believe I'm being treated like some prized possession. “Uh… yes, I suppose it’s time.”

She wanted to remember the route they took, all of the twists and turns it took to get them to their destination, she really did, but after being assaulted by strange women, and being wrapped up like a gift for some arrogant royal, she was exhausted and just wanting to get through this event with as quickly as possible.

Raji stepped forward to meet her as she reached her destination, his posture exuding confidence as he extended his hand in greeting. "Welcome to Tanbarun Castle," he declared, his voice laced with an attempt at charm. "It is an honor to have you grace our halls."

"Thank you for your… hospitality," she replied politely, her tone neutral. As her hand hesitantly rose to be placed in his, she lifted her gaze to assess the man in front of her.

He was definitely his fathers son. While she did not care much for politics, she had seen him making announcements in the past. However while she couldn’t speak for the King, it seemed the Prince had a small beauty mark under his left eye.

“Ah, the famous red hair,” Raji mused, his tone a mixture of admiration and possessiveness as he raised his free hand to stroke her hair. “Truly a sight to behold. Yes, I do believe you will make a fitting concubine for me.”

Shirayuki's eyes widened in surprise as Raji suddenly snapped near her ear, straightening his posture with a grin. "Please, let us walk and get to know each other."

He took every opportunity to engage Shirayuki in conversation, attempting to win her over with tales of his kingdom's splendor and his own achievements. As much as he was focused on his words, it wasn’t hard to notice she was only offering the basic required responses to his tales.

They were walking through one of the many identical corridors when Raji stopped walking and turned to face her.

"I know you must hate me for bringing you here."

Shirayuki sighed softly, "It's not hate, Prince Raji. It's a desire to be free and live on my terms."

“Such a rare jewel should be protected, adorned, and worshiped, do you not agree?”

“My hair making me an oddity does not make me something to be possessed, and possessions don't define happiness. Hopefully one day you will realize that.”

Raji looked as if he were truly contemplating her words for a moment, before he snapped his fingers again and raised his fist in the air triumphantly. “I imagine once you become more comfortable here, and I give you everything you could possibly desire, you’ll see what life can truly be like!”

She did her best to remain composed and attentive, her responses measured and polite. Beneath her composed exterior, her thoughts were a whirlwind. No matter where her gaze rested, multiple guards were in her vision. Unsure of the path that had been set before her, and the complexities that lay ahead in the castle that was now her new home… She felt trapped.

Raji seemed fascinated by her; enjoyed listening to her talk of her running a business, and how she interacted with others outside of the palace. It truly was as if he was unfamiliar with a world that didn’t revolve around himself.

"You have such a captivating way of describing your life," Raji had remarked.

"Thank you, Prince Raji," Shirayuki replied. He's so oblivious to the real world... I wonder if he's ever faced any hardships.

As the days went on, Raji was getting more bold in his advances. It had started innocently enough, he asked if he could hold her hand. Since he so politely asked… Shirayuki had told him no.

That act of insubordination had earned her a split lip from Dain at the end of the night; the captain of the guards who had been so smug about stealing her away from her home in the first place. He always had a stupid proud grin on his face as he watched her walk about the palace.

The next time Raji got closer to her he bypassed her hand entirely, grabbed her waist with both hands and leaned in. Not to be deterred by Shirayuki turning her head, his wet lips came into contact with her cheek with a pleased moan.

She had learned to wait until she had passed by the captain before wiping her cheek on her sleeve.

It had now been a fortnight since her arrival at the palace, and today was one of the fortunate days that she had not been summoned to Rajis side.

The act of talking to Raji itself wasn’t terrible. For the most part, he was extremely receptive in conversation albeit naive. The issue with Raji was that he was always touching her. Always an arm wrapped around her waist as they walked, pulling her to his side when she managed to stray too far. Whenever he referred to her in front of others his hands always found themselves woven in her hair like it was an accessory to him.

"You are quite extraordinary, Shirayuki," Raji said, his tone unusually sincere.

"Thank you, Prince Raji," she replied. Despite the smile on her face, her eyes were always watching the movements of the guards in the rooms and where any open windows were located.

She was certain that it would be a while before the security developed some slack when it came to her presence, but it wouldn’t hurt to keep an eye out for patterns while she waited.

"I heard you've been exploring the castle gardens a lot lately," Chelle, the blonde chef in the kitchen commented with a knowing smile as she gracefully danced around the other staff in the kitchen working hard to prepare dinner. Shirayuki had found herself sitting on some crates in the corner of the kitchens during a lot of the free time when she was restricted to the palace walls. It was a peaceful chaos that felt very familiar to her.

"Yes, it's a little sanctuary, a small glimpse of the life I left behind." Shirayuki admitted.

“It’s a shame I never had the need for any medicine, it sounds like such a lovely place.”

“That’s a sweet thought, but I’m glad you didn’t come down with an illness just for that. I mean, I still technically own it for a few weeks. If you’re nearby you could probably peek in the windows?” A chuckle escaped her lips as she wanted Chelle unload a small box of potatoes onto the table in front of her, arms bordering the edges so that none fell on the floor, "Are you sure you don’t want help with that?”

Chelle pursed her lips, “You know you can’t get dirty in these dresses. If His Highness finds out you’ve been doing peasant work, he won't be pleased with either of us.”

“Prince Raji wont find out, I’ll be more careful this time… besides,” Shirayuki grinned. “I am a peasant.”

It was nice to have someone to talk to, someone that wasn’t Raji, someone that understood what it was like to have to work hard for what you obtained. Aside from the pride of working in the royal palace, Chelle was just a normal person like her.

“Fine, Lady peasant,” The corners of Chelles lips curved up to reveal a pretty smile as she tossed a peeler to Shirayuki. “Kindly peel me about a dozen more potatoes.”

Only after the task was completed, did the atmosphere in the kitchen change. It looked as if the majority of the prep was done and the cooking proper was to begin. Shirayuki washed her hands thoroughly and approached the guard waiting outside of the kitchen for her.

“I’m ready to go back to my room for the night, if you’re ready to get going?” The look in his eyes spoke volumes of being unimpressed with her kitchen meddling antics, but he kept his mouth shut as he pushed himself off the wall and led the way back to her room.

This path was the most familiar to her, and in just a few turns of the hallways and up the stairs she was back into her room.

“Thank you for today,” If the guards ever wanted to refuse her choice of activities, she would be stuck in this room. She really was grateful for them.

“Hn.”

The door closed.

Locked.

The sound of heavy footsteps walking away.

Shirayuki was alone again.

Shirayuki walked to and opened a window. Leaning out all she could see was the courtyards stained a deep blue in the evening dusk, with the forest even darker beyond that. She rested her chin on her hands, looking at the familiar sight below her window. It was only three stories to the ground, statistically speaking she would be able to survive the fall… but it was after the fall that would be the issue. What would end up broken or fractured, and would the injury make her incapable of running?

Her gaze drifted off into the distance as her thoughts took her away from the palace. Initially she had wished for her view to be from the other side of the palace, of gardens and the edges of the capital city. Recently however, she realized the flaw in that concept. Seeing the city as a motivation to escape was one thing, but the calm of the forest was good to calm her- something she was starting to desire more often as she was incorporated more into day-to-day palace life.

A knock at the door interrupted her thoughts, before Selene unlocked and opened the door. A smile appeared on her face as she poked her head in.

“Evening, Prince Raji was hoping you would join him for dinner.”

Shirayuki hadn’t been expecting any evening calls from Raji anytime soon, or perhaps that was simply her desire masquerading as an expectation. Hands smoothed out the creases in her dress from leaning against the windowsill. No matter…. An indulging smile graced her lips to match the maid.

“Well, we mustn’t keep him waiting then!" She lifted the front of her dress slightly, as to not step on it, and headed out the door following Selene down the hall. He may be trying to get under her clothes, but she refused to let the First Prince of Tanbarun get under her skin.

[shinyhappydigistar]

I think those who have followed my blog or looked through its contents would know I'm a whore for dads with kids. Fankids especially, if they don't have them.

So, here's Larry's young daughter Laura from WhippedLuna's Plaindoughnutshipping fic "Anything But Ordinary", in the hopes they like it! ^^; The academy she goes to was deliberately made ambiguous, so I did both so you can decide which one for yourself.

[fierykitten2]

I don't want to accidentally start an internet war or anything but I do want to put the point out there that the Pretty Cure fandom's reaction to the Glitter Force sub-fandom is basically like if I'm like "Hi, my favourite Animal Crossing villager is Megan, I think she's pretty, I love the colour purple and she has a great personality. Not the best personality, but her personality is cute so she's still number one in my heart" and someone responds with "*Candy"

[fairyprince7]

Rating:

General Audiences

Archive Warning:

No Archive Warnings Apply

Category:

Gen

Characters:

Shirayuki Hime | Cure Princess

Aino Megumi | Cure Lovely

Sagara Seiji

Aino Megumi | Cure Lovely's Parents

Hosshiwa (Pretty Cure)

Additional Tags:

Trans Female Character

Trans Male Character

Transphobia

Hime being supportive while being so confused. she's a little confused but she's got the spirit

also there's an entire saiark fight in this. enjoy

Iona and Yuko are mentioned once.

I wrote a fic! about Hime trying to support her trans friends while being clueless

please enjoy :3

(reblogs over likes!)

[squirmp]

so this is what my uni class thought about these two and i mean

come on 

[himeofshyness]

A/N: After experiencing the Immersive Sam mod by @maggplays, I was inspired to write a fanfic based on one of its cutscenes. Enjoy!

Sam was nervously pacing near the beach tide pools, his fingers tapping anxiously against the body of his guitar. In his chest, his heart beat a frantic rhythm, filled with anticipation and a mix of excitement and trepidation. Today was the day he had decided to confess his true feelings to someone special, the farmer who had recently moved in, Yvonne.

Under the soft morning sunlight, the waves gently lapped against the shore. The beach tide pools glimmered enticingly, their azure depths reflecting the cloudless sky. It was a tranquil and beautiful scene, the perfect backdrop for a moment of heartfelt confession.

He was drawn to Yvonne's genuine kindness, her warm smile, and her easy way of connecting with people. Over the past weeks, they had spent a lot of time together, working in the community center project, exploring the town, and sharing stories about their lives. All the while, Sam's feelings for her had grown stronger, and he knew it was time to take a chance and confess his love.

Summoning his courage, he had asked Yvonne to meet him at the beach tide pools in the morning, promising her something special. Now, as he waited for her to arrive, his mind raced with the possible outcomes of his confession, from the joyous and positive to the painful and rejection.

Finally, he spotted Yvonne walking towards him, her soft blond hair swaying gently with the breeze. Her presence eased his nerves and yet, his heart skipped a beat as she got closer. They exchanged a few words, a mixture of pleasantries and friendly banter, as she settled down on the huge wooden log he had chosen as their meeting spot.

Sam took a deep breath, steadying himself as he began to strum his guitar carefully starting with a familiar melody, one that he knew Yvonne liked. The sound of the guitar strings vibrated through the air, carrying the first notes of his confession.

As the music played, Sam couldn't help but glance at Yvonne. Her expression was soft and attentive, her eyes fixed on him as he continued to play. He wanted to tell her how much she meant to him, how her laughter and kindness brought color to his life, and how he couldn't imagine a day without her in it.

The melody changed, the chords shifting into a more romantic tune, as Sam prepared himself to sing the lyrics he had carefully written. He had poured his heart into those words, expressing his deepest feelings for her.

Taking a deep breath, Sam began to sing, his voice both trembling and clear as he started the first verse. The words poured out, a declaration of his admiration and love for Yvonne. The lyrics painted a picture of his desires, his dreams, and his hope that she might feel the same way.

Yvonne listened quietly, her eyes never leaving his face. Her expression remained unchanged, but her slight smile and the gentle tilt of her head showed that she was paying close attention to his every word.

Sam's voice grew more confident as he continued to sing. He sang of the adventures they had shared, the moments they had laughed and cried together, and the deep connection he felt with her. His fingers moved with increasing skill on the guitar, the music complementing the heartfelt lyrics.

As the song slowly came to an end, Sam held the final note for a few moments longer, savoring the sound of his confession. He let the last word linger in the air, waiting for Yvonne's response.

Silence fell over the beach tide pools. The waves continued to lap against the shore, the only sound breaking the quiet. Sam looked at Yvonne, his heart in his throat, waiting for her reaction.

Yvonne's eyes remained on him, her expression still soft and kind. For a moment, she didn't react, just gazing at him with a gentle smile. Then, she slowly stood up and took a step closer to him.

Her hand reached up to gently caress his cheek, her touch warm and soothing. Sam's breath hitched, and he almost missed the soft murmur that escaped her lips.

"Sam..." she whispered, her voice barely above a whisper. The sound of his name on her lips sent a shiver down his spine. She leaned in slightly, her face just inches away from his.

Her eyes, deep and sparkling, looked into his, and just as he thought he'd faint from the tension, she smiled wider and did something Sam never expected. She leaned forward and pressed a gentle, tender kiss on his lips.

Time seemed to freeze in that moment. Sam's mind went blank, his heart skipped a beat, and all he could focus on was the feeling of her lips on his. He didn't know what to do, unsure if this was just a response or a sign of her reciprocation.

Just as he was about to react, Yvonne pulled back a soft flush of color on her cheeks. She looked at him, her eyes sparkling with warmth and affection. "Thank you." she said quietly, her voice trembling slightly. "For that wonderful song and showing me your true feelings."

Her words sent a wave of relief and joy through him. The uncertainty and anxiety that he had felt a moment ago gave way to a new sense of hope and understanding. He couldn't help but smile, feeling his heart swell with happiness.

"I take it." he said, his voice a little shaky, "You feel the same way?"

Yvonne nodded, her smile growing even wider. "I do." she confessed. "Your song was beautiful, and I... I feel the same."

Sam couldn't believe his ears. His confession had not only been accepted but reciprocated. He let out a breath he didn't know he was holding, a wave of pure elation spreading through him. He set aside his guitar and reached for her, pulling her into a tight embrace.

She leaned into him, her arms wrapping around his neck. They stood there by the beach tide pools, holding each other tight, the only sound being the soft whisper of the waves and their own beating hearts.

"I was so afraid you wouldn't feel the same." Sam whispered, burying his face in her hair. He could smell the honey and lavender scent, and it brought an even greater sense of comfort and contentment.

Yvonne chuckled softly, her breath tickling his neck. "I was just as scared." she admitted. "I never thought you'd see me that way."

"How could I not?" Sam pulled back slightly so he could look at her. "You're the kindest, most genuine person I've ever met. Spending time with you feels like coming home."

"I feel the same." Yvonne echoed, her eyes sparkling. "You bring so much laughter and joy into my life. I can't imagine my days without you by my side."

The sun slowly rose higher in the sky, casting a warm golden glow over the beach. Yvonne and Sam, still holding each other, watched the waves lapping against the shore, feeling as if the world was a more beautiful place now that they had confessed their love.

Together, they knew that the road ahead would be filled with both joy and challenges. But as long as they had each other, nothing seemed impossible. The love they shared was like a powerful force, guiding them through any storm.

As they walked hand in hand towards the future, they knew that their lives would never be the same again.

~END~

Here are some screenshots related to this cutscene:

Mod: "Maggs Immersive Sam Romance Dialogue and Events (x)Spicy or Sweet 1.6" by Maggplays

[miaqc1]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Mai-HiME, Mai-Otome Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Tokiha Mai & Tokiha Mai Characters: Tokiha Mai Additional Tags: Crossover, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, 1 Sentence Fiction, Some Plot, Female Protagonist, same name, sharing name, POV Third Person, HiME and Otome, Materialization, Nanomachines, Wordcount: 0-100, autistic author, Not Beta Read, Cross-Posted on SquidgeWorld Summary:

One-sentence fanfic where Otome Mai meets HiME Mai.

[himetarts]

morgan francis ladies and gents

i want to [redacted] [redacted] [redacted]

[kiichikonoes]

I’m kind of curious what everyone does for their fandoms for fun. Like I know a lot of fic writers force themselves to write but what about the people who take it upon themselves to make edits, or update fandom wiki or make an archive of screenshots or create icons for other people to use. Is it something that comes natural to you? Are you just having fun and chose that specific part of content that seems most fun to make?

I can only speak from the perspective of someone who makes fanart occasionally. It’s because I’ve always been into drawing and putting characters in funny situations/making memes makes my brain go brrr. I guess I mostly don’t really understand the motivation behind people doing fandom stuff in the category of “cataloging.”

[koviah]

A Journey to Belonging

Ryuu Introspection one shot

[Read on AO3]

The people in the hall all offer boisterous greetings to each other; their voices flow comfortably together as if it was something practiced, as if they were all given the same script beforehand.

No matter how many books Ryuu reads on the subject, he could never catch up to the same page as everyone else.

When it comes time to pass him they offer a smile and curt nod.

It’s a familiar ache.

He used to try to include himself, but the practiced phrases never sound as good out loud as they did in his head.

Something about what he says is wrong- the conversation halts. They could sense he didn’t belong.

The silence is so loud.

The flowers refuse to teach him how to open up. He specializes in poisons, instead.

He stops trying.

*

Shirayuki joins the team. As the weeks go on he waits for her to see him for who he truly was and drift off like all the others.

Why doesn’t she?

She shows him her work, and asks his opinions. Continues to listen intently, taking notes when needed and smiling at his conclusions- even thanking him for his time.

His throat feels tight, and his eyes begin to burn.

‘When was the last time I had some water?’ He shouldn’t overdo it. Dehydration would only hinder his research.

Shirayuki turns to him as he stands. Her mouth doesn’t move but her questioning eyes are kind and he wants to answer. “W-water!”

If she hears him stutter, she doesn’t show it.

She simply smiles and goes back to her paper.

It makes him want to try again.

*

Obi makes a joke that gets a reaction out of the other people in the room and it hurts to be left out again.

The words weren’t meant for him.

He pretends to not hear it.

Someone as charismatic as Obi wouldn’t want to wait to hear what he had to say, anyways. He wasn’t witty enough for a conversation with this many people.

Ryuu is startled as a tall lanky form leans against his desk. Gold eyes focused on his face.

“I- Uhm…”

His words were always too loud, his laughter too sudden, he was always trying too hard yet somehow never hard enough.

His mind goes blank.

He feels ashamed that he wasn’t prepared.

Obi lifts a hand to ruffle his hair with a smile, effectively breaking through his intrusive thoughts, offering a silent communication. just for him.

Ryuu closes his mouth and watches in awe as Obi gets comfortable next to him as if it were easy.

Throughout the conversation the taller man pats his shoulder twice, and occasionally moves around some of the items on his desk with a sly grin. It feels as if Obi wanted to make sure his presence was felt.

Ryuu grumbles and glares as he corrects everything, but the corners of his lips threaten to betray him with a smile. It feels nice to have him there.

*

It becomes part of his daily ritual to be crossing the courtyard and have Obi fall from the sky to walk with him.

He doesn’t think he will ever be used to it, but he smiles upon seeing the older man approach him now.

*

When Shirayuki heads to the cafeteria first she always grabs an extra plate for him at dinner. It makes him warm to think that he would be missed if he continued working as he once used to.

They wait for Obi to finish his patrolling shift together.

*

He doesn’t remember when he starts to look forward to these moments with excitement instead of hesitation.

He wishes he could go back in time.

He would give himself a message to hold on to.

It gets easier.

He notices that he no longer has to plan out what to say, and how to say them. Sometimes he stutters, and other times he just shrugs, but his words don’t feel wrong anymore.

The pervasive ache finally subsides.

*

<center>Someday, someone will love you

and you will forget

why no one else ever could.</center>

[scarlettfevor]

When I wrote this I was barely done with the girl a section and now I'm writing THIS when I'm barely done with girl b, and I just want to say that I am REALLY enjoying this novel. I was a little confused about the characters and I don't like judging the books I've read when I'm barely into them and/or there's still lots of stuff that I don't understand so I went back and reread the entire girl a section (bc I was a bit unclear on things thanks to the audiobook) and I'm proud to say that now I completely get whats going on and whos who. Lastly, I really fucking love this book. It was so bizarre to hear the narrator describe tumblr and the sims 4 to me, like I don't like how similar I am to Violet. But thankfully even though I'm interested in true crime I don't consider myself to be a true crime buff or armchair detective, and I definitely don't have a "favorite serial killer" jfc Violet. But when I first started this novel it was looking like 4 stars and now that I'm nearly 2/3rd of the way through it still is!! I'm so happy because like I've said before, most popular thrillers are trash but this has a level of detail to not only the characters and the relationships but the side characters and the history of the town that you NEVER see in thrillers. I'm kind of obsessed with this book and will probably finish it today, and I want to read boy parts after this because I am also mildly obsessed with Eliza Clark

Finally got ahold of the audiobook of Penance by Eliza Clark and I have mixed emotions about it. On one hand I love the premise and I feel like it's written well enough to where I feel like the author isn't going to clumsily stumble through her own story and fall on her face at the end like the majority of popular thrillers. But also this story suffers from having someone who hasn't been in school for a long time attempting to write teenagers. The funny thing is that whenever I see a horrible portrayal of teenagers, specifically of zoomers its never like, inaccurate portrayals of slang and trends that most teenagers cringe at, it's extremely unnatural dialogue that I don't understand how even a 30 or 40 year old can't see how awkward and cringe and flat out bad of a portrayal they're doing. You can claim that it's regional differences, even if we were all teenagers once I still don't know what it's like to be a popular mean British girl, but I'm fairly certain that actual popular mean British girls don't go around describing themselves as popular mean girls. The funny thing is that they've mentioned several times that these girls (ok it was actually like one girl but she introduced too many characters and I got confused so I can't even remember the name of the girl who said it) are trying to imitate the mean girls in popular American shows/movies. But I think that it's SO funny how instead of going for the obvious Regina George or maybe the more posh Blair Waldorf, they chose Sharpay Evans....I'm very familiar with the popular mean girl trope because I always love the girls who fall into this category and I can say with 100% certainty that none of these girls act like this either. I don't know what the author is going for but it's very painful to listen to.