#him crushing someone he also thinks is a shifty fuck lol

[thatsnotbeautiful]

i dig Mithrun’s desires slowly coming back, i dig Mithrun forming new desires but his relationship to desire is forever altered so he has to find new ways to process it — lately i’ve been thinking abt how the demon might’ve eaten many of Mithrun’s desires, and they aren’t coming back… but he can still form new ones. and what might those new, not yet eaten ones be?

if in other words i’m trying to find a loophole where he could have some kind of feelings for Kabru lol, and one thing i landed on was that the specific quality of love he might’ve had for his beloved may be gone, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t other kinds of love.

which brings me to: while rereading i noticed that he mentions his brother liked someone he thought was out of his league, and then in one of the extra’s he’s talking abt how he looked down on everyone, with his view of his beloved simply being “untrustworthy”. and then, iirc, we see them as his beloved/partner in the dungeon… and that’s it.

which is making me wonder whether he loved them or if he just coveted them lol; he didn’t think his brother deserved them and was seemingly jealous of his brother being able to casually voice his desire for X or Y w/o considering his standing or the appropriateness of it… if what he felt wasn’t really love at all, then. well

[tendertokyo]

My take on NCT at Hogwarts

what is it with me and being active on this god forsaken app all of a sudden... anyways, i know that we've thrown jk rowling in the garbage but listen i can't just throw away my whole childhood for one stupid rich white cis woman. also i have no idea what's going on with the neos but when do i ever? alright here we go

taeil: he's giving me frustrated hufflepuff, like he really wished to be in gryffindoor but it didn't work out. think he'd be a halfblood and have a pet toad. likes to visit hagrid for tea sometimes. simps over some bad bitch in slytherin, really thinks she's into him too, everyone tells him she's way out of his league. broke his wand twice already trying to open a can of sardines

taeyong: also strong hufflepuff energy. he's the keeper and captain of their quidditch team and a prefect too, picked purely cause he's good with kids. walks around without his scarf in the cold winter because he wrapped it around ten's neck one morning and nagged on him for not taking care of his health properly, never got the scarf back and doesn't mind. i feel like snape would intimidate the crap out of him, like he would not be able to stay calm during his classes rip. he'd be adored by all the other teachers though, especially flitwick who believes he's really gifted in charms

johnny: a gryffindoor pureblood and keeper and captain of the quidditch team. always the one who tries to talk things out with mcgonnagall when they pull some stupid shit and get caught, never successful. has the marauders map and likes to throw underground raves in hidden rooms and tunnels. buddies with peeves and the house elves. buddies with everyone actually. and regardless of liking him like that or not, every girl in school has fantasized of fucking him in the quidditch locker room showers ooooop-

yuta: omg the heartbreaker of the school. a halfblood slytherin prefect and beater. snape's favourite student, like he gets whatever he wants from that man without trying. everyone is lowkey into him cause of his hot and mysterious vibe and there are so many rumours about his sex life circulating around, but no one actually knows if he's seeing someone. people also speculate he's a metamorphmagus but no lol he just dies his hair a lot. has a pet cat who's mean to everyone except him and mark. likes to explore the forbidden forest cause he's a weirdo

doyoung: a ravenclaw pureblood who hates quidditch, only shows up for taeyong's matches and nags him afterwards if hufflepuff loses. he's the headboy and happily uses his title to threaten haechan. hates divination with a passion and idolizes mcgonnagal, as he should. knows everyone's bussiness in the whole damn castle, never starts drama but almost always ends it. used to tutor some younger students but they quickly realised he's a mini mcgonnagall and zoomed straight outta there. snape lowkey wishes he was in slytherin but don't tell anyone

kun: gryffindoor headboy, probably the calmest person in that entire house and the only one who can kinda control the chaos. if yangyang or hendery annoy him too much he'll give them the wrong password on purpose, mcgonnagal has this unspoken respect for him for that reason. feels really bad for the house elves and wants to help them as much as he can. known as the dad or daddy of gryffindoor, depending on who you ask hehehehe

ten: the artsiest ravenclaw but fucking terrible at riddles, so he's always stuck at the door unless someone let's him inside lmao. is super into divination but purely for the aesthetic. never wears his uniform properly, always wears taeyong's scarf and lots of witchy jewelry. started a dance club in the room of requirement, loves hogwarts halloween with his whole heart. set a classroom on fire once and managed to sneak away undetected. always hooks up with someone at johnny's parties

jaehyun: the fucking fratboy of gryffindoor. he's a halfblood and a chaser on the quidditch team. left so many girls on read oh my god. sneaks alcohol and weed into school, coorganizes parties with johnny, yuta and mark. people think he's this hot bad boy or some shit, lol no bitch he's a dumbass don't waste your energy on a doofus like him, have you heard his laugh he sounds like a 45 year old man. mcgonnagall doesn't trust him at all, always looks at him with shifty eyes. the fat lady flirts with him everytime he approaches the commonroom door

winwin: on the snobby pureblood side of slytherin, like he gives off really judgy vibes. is in ten's dance club, there's a rumor going around that he's an animagus 'cause he moves gracefully like a cat or smth, but he isn't he's just really talented. spends most of his time in the owlery petting birds. the bloody baron freaks him out, most of the ghosts do. tried to be a big brother figure to renjun and chenle but they bullied his ass like crazy so he dropped them like hot potatoes

jungwoo: the most confident gryffindoor y'all. he's a muggleborn and a chaser. has the cutest pet owl, is really into care of magical creatures. snape hates him because he's too "sunny" of a person. wild at parties but looks fine in the morning somehow. the biggest flirt you'll ever meet and has so many bitches wrapped around his little finger lol, there's a rumor going around that he's real beast in bed. awesome at dueling, uses his cute airhead shtick to apsolutely destroy people. can you tell i love his pisces ass?

lucas: a hufflepuff halfblood and beater. wannabe fuckboy but can't because he cares too much lol, those muscles are made of feelings dawg. hits on every girl he sees and is almost always successful 'cause we're weak for cute and sweet himbos. is the biggest show off on the quidditch field and has his own fan club. really into care for magical creatures, like literally wants to befriend every single one of them, hagrid has to pull his ass away from them before he gets hurt rip

mark: a gryffindoor prodigy, a muggleborn and a chaser. the most stressed prefect you've ever seen. mcgonnagall has a soft spot for him and everyone knows it. snape dislikes him but respects him because he's fucking brilliant at potions. a lot of people like him and are into him but he doesn't know how to respond to them lol socially awkward king. plans parties with johnny yuta jaehyun and ten, is always roped into the dreamies schemes against his will. no one can fucking tell if him and haechan are on good terms cause they're at each other's throats all the time, but slobber all over each other like crazy when they get drunk

xiaojun: the most emotional ravenclaw. a halfblood and a prefect. he dated a girl for a long time and she broke his heart, moped about it in the prefect's bathroom for ages. lowkey believes she cheated on him with yuta but isn't sure, is extra weary around him though. says he's done with love but then simps over a new girl every two weeks smh. no one understands how he's such good friends with hendery and yangyang, like the combination of the two of them is a recipe for disaster. whenever they rope him into their bullshit, he always manages to drop their asses in the perfect time and doesn't get caught. many portaits are jealous of him 'cause he has better bone structure then them lol

hendery: the best definition of a gryffindoor. comes from a rich pureblood family, is a beater on the quidditch team. he's the life of the party, man. out of all the students he hates, he is the one snape hates the MOST and he's so proud of that. a really fast runner so he never ends up in detention 'cause it's just too hard to catch him. buddies with the ghosts and hagrid. tries really hard to impress girls, it only works half of the time when he's not being too intense

yangyang: also a gryffindoor pureblood, tried out for the chaser position but didn't make it, is still bitter about it. has a really fucked up owl that always messes up his letters. constantly in detention, like he's cleaned that entire castle by himself 43 times already. also in ten's dance club, also really good at dueling when he actually tries. really into muggle culture, explores it in his free time and shows everyone cool, new music he found all the time. gives kun daily headaches cause he's way too energetic in the morning

shotaro: imma say he's a hufflepuff but don't quote me on that cause i don't know him that well. he seems like he'd have lots of friends though and would be in ten's dance club

sungchan: don't know him well either so i'll just say gryffindoor??

renjun: i'm torn between ravenclaw and slytherin, gonna go with slytherin for him. he's a halfblood and a prefect, also uses his title to threaten haechan. loves defence against the dark arts anď herbology, might become a healer someday. gets tricked by the moving staircases all the fucking time, ends up at madam pomfrey's way more than he likes to admit. likes the slytherin aesthetic but can't stand the evil stereotypes. most people think him and chenle are brothers, wants to strangle chenle when he plays into it. once told the bloody baron to fuck off, no one dares get on his bad side since that day

jeno: pureblood hufflepuff prefect and a chaser. he's the cute, athletic guy everyone has a crush on. is on snape's good side 'cause he likes cleaning up his brewing station after finishing the task the lession is about. is the best flyer in the entire school and has the best chance of getting scouted in the future, everyone knows it but if you mention it to him he blushes like crazy. i feel like he's been in many fwb situations but they all ended well because he's a gentleman

haechan: a slytherin through and through. halfblood and seeker on the quidditch team. thought he was gonna be prefect and was hella pissed he wasn't chosen, i mean hello you're a snake who would want to give a snake authority goddamn it. also always complains during quidditch matches, calls everything a foul just 'cause he wants to win. puts up this persona of the mischevious slytherin boy but it falls flat on it's ass because he's peeves's favourite target

jaemin: a muggleborn hufflepuff, because of that reason he's sworn to himself he'll take care of jisung like a mother. a chaser on the quidditch team. such a sweetheart my gosh, like that dude is always so happy, unless he hasn't drunk his 6 cups of coffee. speaking of, mcgonnagall and pomfrey worry for his health like crazy but won't admit it. excells at care for magical creatures and charms, horrible at ancient runes like he didn't think there'd be so much math involved. girls are also crazy into him but he's such an introvert, the thought of someone wanting to be around him so much scares him. still flirts with everything that breathes lol

chenle: a slytherin and a pureblood, from one of those rich old families. because of that people expect him to be a lil brat, turns out to be the coolest guy you'll ever meet. he's friends with everyone regardless of house, a chaser on the quidditch team, known as the one who scores the most points in a game. he's great at defence against the dark arts and transfiguration, is thinking about becoming an auror 'cause that dude fears nothing i'm telling you. was made a prefect instead of haechan, rubs it in his face like crazy, but ultimately just let's people get away with stupid shit like "haha nice one, respect". memorized all the secret passageways of the castle in his head, helps johnny, mark, ten and jaehyun with their parties. pisses off filch like no other, was in detention all the time with yangyang until they realised how terrible it is when the two of them are in close contact lol so he gets let off the hook all the time. also fucking flirts with everything that breathes, the biggest fucking tease like you never know what he means smh

jisung: jaemin's muggleborn hufflepuff son, though most people are surprised he isn't in gryffindoor 'cause god the reckless shit that boy pulls... always late to breakfast with his uniforn all messy. people think he's very innocent but like his bestfriend is chenle, so how pure could he be. he's a seeker on the quidditch team, goes extra hard during hufflepuff-slytherin matches 'cause he wants to knock haechan off his high horse. blushes like crazy whenever he sees a cute girl which only gives chenle more reason to tease him 'cause he's a lil bitch like that. is the star of ten's dance club but has tripped and fallen down multiple flights of stairs, this kid's a walking paradox

to conclude:

gryffindoor: johnny, kun, jaehyun, jungwoo, mark, hendery, yangyang, sungchan

hufflepuff: taeil, taeyong, lucas, jeno, jaemin, shotaro, jisung

ravenclaw: doyoung, ten, xiaojun

slytherin: yuta, winwin, renjun, haechan, chenle

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 149: Villain Island

Previously on BnHA: Twice confronted Nighteye with a clone of Rappa. Nighteye proceeded to beat his ass using rubber seal stamps, incidentally revealing his surprisingly cut washboard abs. Night then blasted away part of Twice’s mask, forcing Twice to retreat in a panic. His personality disorder started to get the better of him, but then Toga showed up and tied a bandana around the missing part of his mask, and it calmed him down and was also the sweetest fucking thing I’ve ever seen. Twice briefly flashbacked to the League of Villains meeting when Tomura announced that Togawice would be lent out to the Eight Precepts. Twice was against this because it turns out he feels responsible for introducing Overhaul to the League and getting Magne killed (and Compress maimed, but no one cares about him). Toga wasn’t keen on it either, but Tomura somehow won them both over by smiling and making it seem like he had a plan in the works. Whether he actually does is anyone’s guess, but damned if it wasn’t convincing. Anyway, so now Toga and Twice are fed up with the Precepts’ general incompetence, though, and are ready to turn on them. And I’ve never been so excited for a plot twist in my whole damn life.

Today on BnHA: Flashback!Overhaul meets Togawice for the first time and asks them about their quirks. The Precepts then ask if Tomura plans on betraying them, and Twice and Toga are all, “[shifty eyed glance] nope, nothing to see here. no impending betrayals on our end, no sirree.” This apparently is good enough for Overhaul, who asks them to sit tight and wait for further orders. Back in the present, Irinaka makes one last-ditch effort to crush the remaining heroes in his accursed hallway. However, Toga gets him to reveal his true body, and Deku and Aizawa immediately attack. With Aizawa having finally neutralized his quirk, Irinaka is detained. We then cut to Mirio, with time rewinding back to show what happened immediately after he went forward on his own and caught up with Overhaul.

But the real star of this chapter is the omake at the end. Kurogiri takes it upon himself to improve solidarity among the League by taking them all on a mandatory outing to an uninhabited island to engage in a survival trial. Tomura spends the entire time lounging on a couch, Dabi unleashes his inner Bear Grylls, Toga steals a bikini, and tbh I kind of wish we could get an entire manga series of just this. But we’ll just have to settle for these four pages, I guess.

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’ve read up through chapter 178, now. If I’d known yesterday’s Superbowl would end up somehow being more boring than this entire arc, I would have never bothered taking the day off. But, well, hindsight.)  

no, I don’t mind at all

by the way what exactly is going on here with Twice and these handcuff-looking things that I’m not actually sure are handcuffs. because that cord looks more like an earjack cord. but why is it coming from the bracelet like that. I basically have so many questions about this image, and am now also more closely examining exactly why Twice chose a skintight bodysuit as his villain costume

(ETA: I have no excuse. he’s fought with them before and everything; I just never noticed.)

more villain flashbacks!!

but this time it’s T&T introducing themselves to the Eights

“I’m never gonna forgive you, so it’s a pleasure to be working with you” ahaha. classic Twice. this is the kind of iconic bullshit that I’m reading this manga for

Overhaul’s apologizing for killing Magne and says he didn’t want to

but if you really felt that way you could have easily put her back together again, you sociopath

oh my god look at this though??!

holy shit. so she really is another canon trans character, and it’s treated seriously too. I mean, obviously it’s not perfect, and it also sucks that she got killed off, but I’m so used to LGBT manga characters being treated as comedic relief at best, so this frank statement of “hey you misgendered my friend, get it right” and it being totally serious is actually really refreshing

also what is Viz going to do when they get to this chapter. most likely change it up entirely I’ll bet. fucking Viz

anyway, so Twice is all “so now what” and Overhaul says he and Toga just have to follow his orders

he’s also asking for the details of their quirks

but Toga is all “we’ll tell you if and when it’s needed because fuck you”, and have I mentioned I love her???

but holy shit though

bud. are you like, okay. jesus christ

so Twice has decided he hates this and he’s not going to say anything

so naturally the very next thing he does is explain his quirk in great detail!!

holy shit this is an unexpected info dump

once again Horikoshi is all “I see your questions and I will answer them in due time.” so it was a tape measure!! has he had these this whole time?

just went back and checked. yes he has. unbelievable

still waiting on an explanation for that skintight bodysuit though

some of this goes against what we previously knew about his quirk, though. this is the first time a two-thing limit has been brought up, and that seems to go against the whole Calvin and Hobbes “I made a bunch of clones of myself” thing that we know he did way back when (and which he’s also referencing here, as I assume it’s the reason he no longer makes copies of himself). maybe the limit only applies to things/people that aren’t him?

this reminds me a lot of Momo’s quirk in that he needs to know a lot about the object before duplicating it. which means he’s definitely a lot more intelligent than he sometimes comes off as

I mentioned a couple chapters ago that Toga is extremely intelligent as well, and now I’m wondering if Tomura realizes just how lucky he is to have all these smart crazy people on his side. we’ve seen the quality of Overhaul’s own followers, by contrast, and the League most definitely has them beat

anyway! so Toga’s staring at Twice in annoyance for going off like that right after she made a big deal of not telling Overhaul anything

she says he made her look stupid

OMG YESSSS so now she’s going into the details of her own quirk after all omggggg

look at the damn hoops Horikoshi’s making himself jump through all because he made the decision not to do any villain bios. well it’s your own damn fault

I’m starting to understand why Deku keeps all these notebooks

the bit about the transformation time being proportionate to the amount of blood she consumes is extremely interesting and relevant, and now it makes sense why she had that weird gizmo to suck as much blood as possible

I would estimate she got maybe a cup of Ochako’s blood, so we can assume she can transform into her for up to 1 day if needed. but as for Deku, we saw in chapter 114 that she only managed to get like a couple drops worth

one drop is about .05 ml, which is about .0002 cups. so she can transform into Deku for .04% of one day unless I fucked that math up (which is highly possible)

what is that, like a couple seconds?? because if so, holy shit but I’ve been vastly overestimating her ability to wreak mindbendy havoc on our heroes

also does she have to drink the blood right before the transformation for best results? if she drinks someone’s blood but then doesn’t transform into that person right away, does she eventually lose the ability even if she doesn’t transform into them? or can she store that “energy” and use it whenever she likes?

basically this is awesome to be getting so much information here, but now if anything I’ve just got more questions

(ETA: for real. either I really did calculate that wrong, or she got more of Deku’s blood than I thought, or Horikoshi is the one that fucked up the math lol. oh well, it’s easy enough to just shrug and go along with it)

anyway! I almost forgot there was still a chapter going on

so now Overhaul’s henchman is casually asking if Tomura is planning to betray them. well duh

very convincing. well done

anyway, Overhaul seems satisfied for the time being, but he’s telling them they’ll have to stay in the underground HQ until they receive their orders from him. so basically house arrest

and now he’s leaving and Mimic is having a total power trip

seriously dude, simmer down

he’s babbling on about the yakuza getting revenge and “taking back society’s reins from the shadows” and fulfilling the dream of their bedridden boss

and now I think we’re back in the present

and this lil fellow is, as you’ll recall, the guy who’s currently controlling all the shifty walls of the underground HQ while all hopped up on quirk-enhancers

Toga and Twice are having a conversation mid-somersault about how they’re gonna let the heroes take out the Precepts for them. I think

meanwhile Aizawa is asking Deku if he also heard the crazy voice coming from the walls which is, as Deku surmises, Irinaka’s voice

ohhhh I see, if they can pinpoint where the voice is coming from then they can find Irinaka’s real body and like punch him until he quits being an asshole and dragging out the arc with his stupid quirk

do you know, I just realized that basically this entire thing is his fault, and just like that he’s my least favorite character. that’s right. you beat out Stain and even Mineta, because Mineta only ever hijacks like a page or two at a time at most. certainly not a dozen chapters in one go

but anyway, the voice is echoing too much for them to pinpoint it

meanwhile the cops are freaking out because they’re about to get crushed

I can’t figure out why Mimic didn’t just actually crush them all to begin with and be done with it. unless it’s just that he didn’t want the full force of the law bearing down on their organization and seeking justice for dozens of cop murders

HOLY SHIT YOU GUYS TOGA IS TAKING MATTERS INTO HER OWN HANDS

NEVER SEND A BUNCH OF SO-CALLED HEROES TO DO A VILLAIN’S JOB

HOLY SHIT WHAT’S HAPPENING NOW. IRINAKA IS SCREAMING INCOMPREHENSIBLY AND DEKU SEEMS TO HAVE HEARD IT AND IS NOW RUSHING TOWARD THE SOURCE OF THE NOISE

AHHHHH DID HE DO IT???

I CAN’T TELL IF HE GOT HIM. SURELY THAT SMASH WASN’T JUST FOR SHOW

OH MY GODDDDD

YESSSSSSSSSSSS

AND T&T ARE WAVING AT HIM GLEEFULLY AS HE FALLS

I LOVE EVERYTHING HOLY SHIT

the amount of relief I’m feeling right now can accurately be described as “overwhelming” and it’s amazing

because he’s SUCH A GOOD FUCKING PERSON, Deku is catching Irinaka as he falls, because this is BnHA where a fall from a great height onto a bunch of rocks actually will kill you

and please tell me the rooms are back to normal now omg

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

THANK YOU MANGA GODS

HOLY SHIT!!!!!

MIRIOOOOOOOOOO

holy shit. holy fucking shit, finally. finally

FLYING SOLO AGAINST THE FINAL BOSS HOLY SHIT

so is this the part where we find out Mirio is fucking dead omg. holy shit. but you know what, I don’t even care, because we’re finally up to the good stuff and no more bullshit. I feel another binge coming on

  BONUS:

 oho, what’s this? “special jump outing”?

I don’t know where to fucking start omg

first of all, I’ve actually been impressed with their solidarity thus far so this is news to me

second, I can’t with how their idea of team bonding is “let’s build a house from scratch together on an uninhabited island”

third KUROGIRI WHAT ARE YOU WEARING

cutie

I swear to god if they keep up these antics I’m downgrading their name from “League of Villains” to “Villain Squad Jr.”

Tomura is trying to remind us all that he’s For Reals Evil but idk

on the one hand, we actually have seen this guy kill a man with his bare hands. but on the other hand, it was revenge for Magne, and he hasn’t killed anyone else that I can think of, aside from probably his parents by accident

and also my favorite of all the villains is the only one who is for sure a psychotic serial killer, so it could just be that I don’t actually care

so Kuro is telling Tomura to be less strange, and announcing that the first order of business is to secure a water source

are you telling me you came to this random island to build a house and you don’t even know where you’re building it yet

and now there appears to have been some kind of cut, and Tomura is drinking ginger ale. fucking ginger ale. you’re not evil at all, are you

I can’t believe I was actually worried about what these guys might do to Bakugou if they kept him. their idea of torture is probably less fingernail-pulling and more “let’s make him watch a bunch of Kay Jewelers commercials until he cracks.” which to be fair would break me pretty quickly

(ETA: although Tomura did get pretty hardcore there with Overhaul at the end! but I mean, Overhaul was a total prick you guys. that doesn’t count)

and now he’s tied Kurogiri to a tree and is just making him warp over whatever they need

everyone please look at this panel of Dabi wearing overalls

“unexpectedly into it”

this is the most damning evidence yet that he’s definitely related to Shouto

you go Dabi. I feel like he’s learned all about how to survive on a tropical island by like watching Moana a bunch of times or something

consider the coconut, consider its tree, we use each part of the coconut, that’s all we neeeeed

meanwhile Tomura is reading a magazine on a couch on the beach

Toga is wading in the ocean and her overalls got wet so she’s changing into a bikini

did we ever confirm she was really responsible for those serial murders. it could have been someone else. you never know

anyway she stole the bikini and Kurogiri is acting all shocked like “omg this girl really stole a bikini” but like. what else is she gonna do. pay for it like a normal person

don’t tell me you guys were actually legitimately leasing that bar this whole time. Kurogiri probably actually had his liquor license

so Toga is legit frolicking, and Tomura is playing a PSP or something. with the hand still on his face. how can you even see the screen

and now Dabi has caught them all lazing about and he’s throwing a fit

he’s even doing teamwork

now he’s lecturing Dabi on what’s really important

I think they probably would have turned off the Kay Jewelers commercials after like five of them or so and been all “okay I hope you learned your lesson.” and then if he still didn’t want to join them they would have been all “fine then but it’s your loss” and given him a ginger ale and sent him back home

so now Kurogiri is rescinding all rules and letting them all do their thing

Villain Squad Jr. it’s fucking official

and that’s the end of the strip. but the bonus material is still continuing because FA has been doing these translations of the character book! and the next page is amazing oh my god

YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND, IN THE FUTURE WHEN I INEVITABLY START TO WRITE FANFIC ABOUT THIS STUPID ADDICTIVE SERIES THIS IS A FUCKING REFERENCE GOLDMINE

right away I feel like a good 75% of fanfics are slightly off because U.A. has compulsory Saturday classes. say goodbye to your weekend getaway antics

they don’t actually have much homeroom time with Aizawa in the morning. what subject does he actually teach? I need someone to tell me, I refuse to believe Horikoshi hasn’t established this in canon by now. it’s probably somewhere in this very book

(ETA: I STILL NEED TO KNOW THIS. I’M STILL GOING TO INSIST IT’S ART IF HORIKOSHI DOESN’T CORRECT ME)

anyway, that’s it for today, but that was awesome. on I go to chapter 150

[readbythestarlight]

c2e41

I can’t believe it’s time to find out the consequences of Fjord’s accidental mistakes and bad decisions

lol I almost panicked when Travis wasn’t at the table like he HAS to be here for this

I like the “oh nos” coming from the rest about Sam’s ad

SAM NO

LOL MATT’S FACE

Sam doesn’t know what any of his Scottish means he probably just insulted his own mother

He’s gonna give Cad Molly’s necklace IT’S FINE IM NOT EMOTIONAL EXCEPT I AM

Wow okay Cad and Caleb can y’all chill and not give me emotions? Thanks.

B: *hands over Frumpkin*

C: “You have three or four more days you know”

B: “DO I?!” *grabs Frumpkin back and sticks him in her pocket*

I sure hope Sprinkles is alright after almost drowning along with the rest of them, poor thing

FJORD WAS HER FIRST SEMI-KISS

This whole interaction is super cute im dying

Fjord listen no pressure but try not to break her heart

Nott somehow always makes me a little sad

LOL oh this advice Nott. Amazing.

lol the clerics spoiling Matt’s plans for a supply stop

YES GOOD PLEASE ACQUIRE THE SKILLS NEEDED FOR SAILING

Marisha looks so excited

JESTER NO CRUSHING UP YOUR DIAMONDS FOR TATTOOS DO YOU UNDERSTAND

y’all need those

for revivifying or whatever

listen though, they absolutely all need matching sparkle tattoos someday though I want it real bad

OOO are they gonna do pirate shit??? Attack the ship and steal stuff?

This is a test if I ever saw one

Guys don’t do it please it’s such a bad idea

I just feel like Avantica is testing Fjord with basically everything

Guys please just don’t

Cad’s right it’s a bad decision

FJORD

YOU

FUCKING

IDIOT

FJORD IS A FJUCKING FJOOL

this is such a bad idea

Jester giving him the salty shoulder

“I feel like this is somehow connected to your previous bad decisions” yes Cad please keep shaming him

lol Not going crazy with the canon stuff

oh damn fjord

lol buddy Nott doesn’t even need that anymore goofy boy

Sam’s gonna roll really bad and Nott’s gonna hit the ship I can feel it

A NAT 1

okay it didn’t fire okay

Nott darling you’re going to blow up your own ship

“fire boy! go, gogo!”

“Alright, so you owe us a canon.”

Oh lord

20 thank god

SHIIIIIIIPS

They’re gonna end up with wanted posters when they get back to shore

Fjord honey what are you doing this isn’t even like you. Is this about gaining Avantica’s trust? At what cost??

Caduceus the Cool Calm Guy

God this is just… so bad

I’m serious they’re going to end up being wanted criminals

fjord

why the fuck did you give him your real name

Caduceus is the only smart one, hiding his face

stop using you’re real names Fjord for fuck’s sake be smart

Caleb plz stop

oh god guys this isn’t worth the trouble

this is gonna be so bad im so on edge

this is where the fight will break out

Jester what are you going to do oh no

Poor Liab

JESTER YOU CANT TATTOO SOMEONE AGAINST THEIR WILL

here we go I hope you’re ready to live with your bad decisions Fjord

Are they even considering that whatever this magical item is, it’ll probably go straight to Avantica?

“I don’t trust Avantica” Beau says to Caleb through Frumpkin while members of Avantica’s crew are present.

Frumpkin being able to attack is cool as frick I like that

Don’t die Frumpkin

“twelve renegade points, one point paragon!” lol Matt

I like how Beau’s like “we’re trying to be good people” but then threatens to slit his throat. Like FYI Beau, threatening someone over something you don’t have a right to, that you’re STEALING, after ATTACKING THIS GUY, is not how good people act.

Beau leave him alone

Seriously

Somehow this was only a minor disaster. So far. If they don’t end up with wanted posters because they’re pirates I will be shocked.

I don’t like anything that Avantica approves of. I don’t trust her.

She knows. She so knows they’re hiding something.

Caleb so cute talking about cats and books

They need to not look right now. They need to put it in the bag and leave it until they get far away from Avantica.

PAPERRRR

The Not There Fairy, cousin to the Metagaming pigeon

Ohhhh Beau you gonna get a tattoo like Molly’s??

Okay… darling… but maybe not an eye though that just seems like it’s inviting trouble

“But you know he’s dead” WOW

IT’S THE BARBIE RAPUNZEL PAINTBRUSH

Jester. I’m begging you. Save that paint for when y’all actually need a door.

(Also @Taliesin just tell us all what Molly would think of it please Inquiring Minds want to know)

Let Caduceus have the shield

I hope you all feel like guilty fucks tbh that was just not necessary

Oh no mediocre perception check….

Beau please don’t try sneaking into her office my god that’s a terrible idea

lol Laura you little shit xD

“You should seduce her” and Fjord’s over here like lol right uh sure totally that’s a good idea uhhuh

B: “I think if we don’t do anything, it means your eventual demise.”

F: “Well that’s… fucking dark.”

At least they’re finally thinking and really really realizing how bad things are for them right now.

Cad: “If we want to find the ship I think I can help.”

F: “With the seducing?!”

Cad: “What…? no!”

Beau really wants to seduce Avantica.

Caduceus with his naps. He is me.

Fjord and Caleb conference! It’s been a while.

MMMM I LIKE THIS

“Have you ever sacrificed anything to achieve a greater goal?” OHHH FJORD IF YOU ONLY KNEW

Talking about Papa Widogast

“I have tried to live up to the man that he was, and I have… largely failed, but I picked up what I could.” IT’S FINE IM NOT CRYING (yeah i am).

“I think traveling with all of you has emboldened me some. I was alone for a long time. And I… I like this group. I like traveling with you, Fjord.”

Okay Fjord what are you trying to get at now?

FJORD TRUSTING CALEB TO WATCH HIS BACK WITH AVANTICA my heart

oh.

“can i count on you to… right the ship, if need be?”

oh i don’t like the sound of that at all.

I don’t like this conversation

What is Fjord asking? That Caleb take him out if need be? That he makes sure the group gets out if Avantica manages to kill Fjord?

THE TRAVELER

I don’t trust him at all

J: “We’re pirates”

TT: “I know. :)”

TT: “That seed of chaos” DO NOT LIKE

“Well there are many different enchantments—“ RED FLAG RED FLAG BIG RED FLAG

he’s such a creep i hate him someone protect jester from him

he has literally gotten more and more creepy every fucking time

this is absolutely a sinister voice Matt is using too

“Preferably where it will be the least expected… and the creepiest to find” okay that was kinda funny

“the time is coming soon when you will meet the rest of your brethren” DO NOT LIKE

Like I’m not sure he’s EVIL but he creeps me out and I don’t like him

Fjord dream Fjord dream Fjord dream

Fjord dreaming about them bare naked ladies.

From ocean to sky to ocean again.

I don’t think I like this.

Watching, learn, reward.

Nope don’t like.

Smart move grabbing the map

But shit, did Avantica see the same place? If she was in the dream too I bet she did.

Nott, my darling, can you not

LOL

MATT YOU TRICKSTER

a handful of pepper made into a pepper bolt

“The Revelry” oh lord it’s a pirate colony with a court of captains or something isn’t it. Like in PotC3.

Or like Tortuga.

“The Plank King” I KNEW IT

pirate court

Avantica is absolutely gonna challenge the Plank King?

“Welcome to Dark Town” thanks Matt

I’m loving all this history/lore stuff Matt is so good at this kind of thing.

“Takes some notes” I do NOT like that

Poor Orli and the crew.

I thought for sure Avantica was gonna stab Gimati.

Caduceus really wanted to have some Words with Gimati.

B: “Marius the Mariner…. LePua…. LePain….?”

Cad: “That was really good, do me! :D”

B: “Caduceus the… Juices…?”

Listen, Fjord, guys, you owe these people. You hired them and then dragged them into SO MUCH SHIT you didn’t tell them about. And you can’t just leave them here, or refuse to pay them

Like you hired all these people and dragged them into your shit and now you're like "you can keep working for no extra money or you can stay here on pirate island" wow Fjord I’m massively unimpressed. Like I know the whole moral leanings of the whole group have been shifty but come on. This is really not cool.

“By the way, you guys are members of the Revelry.”

So first they joined a crime lord's syndicate and now they joined a pirate gang

*insert faceplam gif here*

Uh-oh…

James Tybalt, assistant to the Plank King

lol Fjord is the worst pirate, forgetting to deal with the money.

As much as I enjoy having a less than perfectly heroic group, I do wish they'd try to be just SLIGHTLY less awful sometimes

Harpy jerky as a gift. I love Nott.

Yasha is very Done with all of this.

Cad: “I serve nature and I’m the maker of fine graves.”

N: “I just love water so much.”

Y: “I like to punch things?”

Hnnn why notes

I’m glad y’all didn’t ALL give them real names

Oh lord, so now if they attack Avantica (and don’t manage to kill her and everyone else) they’ll have the Revelry after them

They’re super doomed

Oh

Oh lord he took the previous king’s hair

Oh man don’t try hitting on Beau

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh SHIT he asked Beau to keep an eye on Avantica and to snitch on her

That’s good. That’s a good. They finally have something going for them (as long as Avantica doesn’t find out)

God this night was a continued disaster. But it was super good. Stressful but fun.

“How did this happen?” The question we all want to have answered, Sam.

“Good shit, Matt.” Agreed!!

[z0ruas]

Just finished binging all of the new Dear White People

and I really enjoyed it! This season felt a lot more character driven as opposed to the plot of the first season, which could be kind of heavy handed. The Order of X subplot felt subtle but it also became clear in the end how it was important; I like that we only saw imagery of it in the backdrop of everything else (love how we saw Lionel looking into it especially), but it didn’t feel like the focus until it needed to be. Sam’s growth was the focus; the fate of a show like Dear White People in the scary internet world of today was the focus; how each character dealt with the trauma of last season was the focus.

LOVED Tessa Thompson’s appearance (since she was the Sam from the movie). Her character was so evil, but also surprising; love that Sam went in there to read her and off the bat she’s like, trying to help her with the lighting and being nice/conversational and Sam’s just like ??!!!?. Lol. What she said about “characters” was really interesting too; I always wonder if Fox News/right wing blacks aren’t aware of what they’re doing. If they’re just doing it because they feel they have no other options. Selling out to the white man’s not the right thing to do, obviously, but given the circumstances, she had a point: it’s all about who has the gold and the resources in the world, and the white billionaires are damn sure gonna gatekeep. It’s a hard thing to be like, “I’m black, so I’m never going to have that conventional happiness, I have to make my own way.” Not every black person is strong enough to do that.

On the topic of villians, I kind of hated that Sylvio ended up being the alt twitter person. I actually liked his character in s1. I was hoping he and Lionel might actually have something substantial romantically, even if it was going to be tough getting there. I really liked the second episode this season, with Lionel navigating the pride parties (those three black gay guys were everything!!! more of them ASAP), and while Sylvio was being shifty all night, I thought he’d get over himself, and eventually Lionel would get his happy ending. Of course fucking now I don’t want that lol. But yeah, they built up Lionel and Sylvio’s dynamic all last season, with Sylvio as his mentor, only to trash it all completely by what, the third ep this season? Whyyy.

Wesley as the new love interest is cute, but kind of boring. There’s nothing wrong with him that I can think of? Idk I just liked the antagonism of Lionel/Sylvio a lot lol. I love getting to see Lionel with a reciprocated interest though. I was really hoping he would get redeemed from the “crushing on impossible straight person” narrative that so many TV gays get saddled with as their only option. He and Troy’s friendship was nice and lowkey this season. You could really tell Lionel was over it.

Though short lived, the anticipation of wondering who the alt twitter troll was intriguing, as we slowly got to realize it was somebody Sam was close to. For a hot sec I thought it might be Gabe lol. Even if it had to be Sylvio, we could’ve had Lionel or someone else find out later. Would’ve felt more gratifying if they’d extended that plot.

Sam’s response to the internet vitriol was really powerful too. This season was less about her talking and more about her reacting, which is often how it can be; it’s exhausting putting yourself out there as a public figure. The story she told about the e-card in her email gave me chills.

The episode that was just her and Gabe talking was probably my favorite, because the entire episode was just that one scene. And it was good. So many little things. The nuance of when she shut off her radio versus when he shut off his camera, and when they forgot themselves long enough to keep both running. Her calling Gabe out with such eloquence, not letting him act like his whole documentary wasn’t personal, telling him “fucking Reggie had nothing to do with you,” then eventually softening. I probably shouldn’t like their relationship? But I do. By the end of s1, I was sad it ended, but understood why it did and was kind of glad it was over. But this one episode changed my mind back. Really well written.

Coco’s arc with the jump ahead to eighteen years later kind of confused me/disappointed me at first, but then we go back and see her real decision, and I was so relieved. I’m really glad she didn’t tell Troy (as far as I remember); it was none of his buisness. He really didn’t have his shit together this season (or last season lol) enough for him to deserve knowing tbh. I’m glad that, like Lionel, it was clear she was over him this season. Cause he really dogged her. I also LOVED the scenes we got with her and Kelsey (shout out to Kelsey being a cute Trini lesbian!!!), though I could’ve gone without Coco having to say “I’m strictly dickly,” and wish Justin Simiens would include an actual lesbian relationship in his show (cause that shit with Nia Long last year was total BS)……Still, I loved Kelsey this season. More of her please.

Joelle really, really shone this season. Her episode with that Hotep nigga (he was so much lmao) was so beautiful, because it felt centered on her; finding out she’s at the top of her class and that she’s studying to be a doctor (don’t remember if we knew that last season). Having her be the one to show the audience the underground railroad for the first time (and the foreshadowing of the X’s on the wall was cool, caught that.) And the actress who plays Joelle is just stunning…her hair! Is everything! Her style, her voice. I’m not sure how I feel about her and Reggie, though. I still feel like Reggie didn’t earn it, partly because I feel like the show never really resolved the whole Reggie/Sam relationship, and because it kind took too many episodes; I know we had a lot of other plots to juggle, but I feel like Reggie should’ve made his move at the end of the Hotep nigga episode! I would’ve been more invested then.

LENA FUCKING WAITHE COMING OUT AT THE END AND SAYING BLACK MEN ARE AFRAID OF BLACK LESBIANS, SPILLING THE MOTHERFUCKING TEA

[multimatchupmadness]

hi!!! i love your blog!!! i saw that you write! and i saw this post where it's like write out the first two sentences of 20 fics you're working on! if you could do that that would be GREAT!!! id love to see your writing!! you obviously don't have to do 20, however many you want is up to you, thank you!! :D

Of course, no one has ever been interesting in my writing I’m so happy to share this with you thank you!!!! I have to see how many I have in the woodworks hahaha, but i’ll start off with my posted ones first! I’m also straying a bit and not doing the first two sentences, but the ones I like the most, because my style of writing doesn’t have like… gripping first lines? ANYWAY!!! moving on:

1: Greed 

    > Oikawa and Iwaizumi thought they would be able to deal with the hardships that came with a long-distance relationships. Thought being the keyword. After their break-up, Oikawa’s despair ends up placing his conciousness into a parallel version of himself. A demon king version of himself

“Can I trust you?” Akaashi challenged.

“I’m in a world where I don’t know what the fuck is happening most of the time. Iwaizumi is supposed to be my prisoner but instead he’s like a roommate. Kuroo is shifty around me because apparently I’m different from the Grand King in a bad way and I just want to go home.” Oikawa’s words sped up as he said them, the end coming out in a rushed jumble.”

2: A Thousand Years 

   > Iwaizumi and Oikawa have known each other since they were eight, it’s not until late in their lives that they realize how much they mean to each other

“Iwaizumi huffed and stood up, turning him away from the mirror, “Oikawa. You look great. Your hair looks great, your outfit is great. Anyone would be lucky to have you.”

Oikawa blinked at him a few times before bursting into a big smile, “Iwa-chan! If you flatter me like that, I’ll start to think maybe you have a crush on me!” 

Iwaizumi went red and scoffed, “As if I could like someone as annoying and stupid like you.””

3: Sissy That Walk 

   > Bokuto is a dancer at a club and a drag queen, Kuroo is in love

“”Yo, you weren’t practicing in those in the house right? You know how long it takes to get those scuffs out of the floor!” Kuroo called in his wake. 

“No no, I’m not trying to get reprimanded by you for a full hour again.” Bokuto said, coming back.

“Good, those are a real pain to clean. Also, no stretching on the counter anymore, you nicked the corner of the wood with the heel.” Kuroo said, rubbing at a little indentation in the edge.

“I’m the one that wears heels, yet you act like more of a housewife than I do.” Bokuto teased.”

4: To Win is To Lose 

   > Eren and Jean make a bet over who will be the first one to fall in love with who will be. It was a mistake both of them didn’t realize they made.

“Jean looked from Eren’s smiling face to the cotton candy and tentatively parted his lips and Eren pushed the sugar into his mouth. Both of their faces were dusted pink as they shared the sweet.

Eren looked over at Jean and went, “Oh, you have a little…” And leaned across the table and swiped at his lower lip.

Jean felt like everything went in slow motion when he felt the pad of his thumb drag across his lip. Eren leaned back, examined his thumb and then stuck it in his mouth. Jean just watched with wide eyes and jaw nearly on the table.

Eren smiled mischievously, a spark in his eyes as he said, “Sweet.” And winked.

Jean seriously thought he was going to die.”

5: Second Chances 

   > Yuu is a barista who runs into his childhood best friend, who carries some less than friendly emotions towards him. 

““You’ve changed, Mika.” Yuu said. It was supposed to be an insult, but honestly it sounded like he was pained.

Mika scoffed, “Of course I have. I grew up. Without you. So you don’t know me.””

ONTO THE ONES I HAVE YET TO FINISH LOL

6: Until It Breaks

***I’M ALMOST DONE THIS ONE AND AM PLANNING ON STARTING POSTING CHAPTERS AT THE END OF THE MONTH!!!!!!!***

   > Oikawa, the resident playboy, made a bet with Makki, his roommate and best friend, that he wouldn’t sleep with the hot guy that sits in the back of his physics class for a full month, but genuinely date them. Iwaizumi, the broody tattooed boy in the back of the lecture hall, made a bet with Mattsun, his best friend and roommate, that he would get the resident playboy to fall in love with him, to give him a taste of his own medicine. However will this fateful and oblivious relationship play out?

““I - Iwa-chan, what has gotten into you today?” Oikawa asked with a wary laugh at the end.

Iwaizumi shrugged, “Maybe it’s something in the air.”

Oikawa gave him a quizzical look, “What do you mean by that?”

“I mean I’m having a good time, with a guy who is on his first date in a while, and is kinda cute. So what if I get a bit carried away?” Iwaizumi said, smiling at him and walking ahead of him.

Oikawa stared back him, his chest felt like it was constricting in on him, but he felt really really good. Oikawa smiled and walked to catch up with him, “Only kinda cute?”

“For now.” Iwaizumi said, a small smirk dancing on his lips.”

7: Satisfied

   > An Iwaoi one-shot based off the song “Satisfied” from Hamilton (yeah its painful lmao i hate myself)

“”I’m planning on proposing to her, Tooru.” Hajime said suddenly over lunch one day. 

Everything sort of went in slow-motion for a few seconds for Oikawa, it was like his brain hay-wired and everything inside of him shut-down. Proposing. He’s getting married. He’s losing him to someone else. They were in public, so Oikawa couldn’t meltdown like his nerves were threatening so he just looked up at Iwaizumi with an as-natural-as-possible smile, “That’s great, Hajime, I’m happy for you.””

8: Make Me Whole Again

   > A MikaYuu fic inspired by Yuri on Ice, really only because Yuu is an ice skater. But the premise is that Yuu is an ice skater that needs to change his style from aggressive to bring a shock-value, so he confides in the prima ballerina, Mikaela and learns more about him than he expected.

““I appreciate the sentiment, Yuu-chan. But you can’t fix me. I’m not fixable. I’m this… empty thing… but it’s okay. I’ve always been this way.” Mikaela said, looking at him with watery eyes, pulling back and away from Yuu.

“Then I won’t fix you. But let me help you fix yourself, because you deserve at least that much.” 

AND THEN HERE’S TWO THAT ARE JUST IDEA RIGHT NOW BUT IM 100% GONNA WRITE BC I’M SUPER HYPE ABOUT THEM!!!!

9: Supernatural based fic

   > Kageyama enrolls in a mixed school, mixed being supernatural beings and  humans attend classes together, because he’s a mixed child, something rare since the presence of supernatural beings is newly accepted in the common world, however, he has yet to tap into his supernatural side and has never met his father, so he’s unaware of what his supernatural side is. In the meantime of trying to figure this out, he’s paired up in his botany class with this annoyingly pretty and just plain annoying fire fairy named Hinata. It all goes downhill from there. 

10: Harem fic!!!!!

   > The Hinata harem is strong in Haikyuu, so I decided to just make a super-duper cliché harem story, Hinata being the MC, Kageyama being the mysterious, broody love interest. Oikawa being the overly flirty, charming boy who may or may not be dating his best friend, Bokuto being the over-protective older brother, Kuroo being the mischevious trouble-maker who is also ridiculously smart which makes him lethal, Kenma as the best friend, Tsukishima as the antagonist that isn’t actually the antagonist but wants to be. Side cast: Suga and Daichi aka the best parents ever, Asahi is the uncle that everyone is scared of but is a sweetheart, Akaashi is the boy Bokuto is ridiculously in love with

That’s it for the ones that have the most potential to be posted!!! I do have a few *cough*NSFW*cough* fics but I’m not posting them here, nor have I actually posted them bc EMBARASSING and there are others that i have in my archives, but i highly doubt they’ll ever actually get written. Thank you so so so much for this ask again!!!!

~ Mod Usagi

[alex-guerin]

Last night I didn't get to sleep at all No, no I lay awake and watched until the morning light Washed away the darkness of the lonely night ... But more and more I find The dreams I left behind Are somehow too real to replace

Oh last night I didn't get to sleep at all No, no The sleeping pill I took was just a waste of time I couldn't close my eyes cuz you were on my mind And last night I didn't get to sleep No I didn't get to sleep at all!

Read under the cut for happy flailings and giddiness!

Literally me. Because I legit got zero fucking sleep last night cuz my brain just kept going back to Jason and sending me mental pictures of his smile and eyes and how adorable he looks coming into the cooler without his jacket or hoodie on and he’s got his arms kinda buried in his snowpants. Gads. I swear I’m in freaking love. The entire day, once 4:30 hit, I was a grinning dope and literally was unable to eat cuz the butterflies in my stomach kept trying to launch off with it and my heart. I was standing at my freezer locker when I saw a familiar orange hat go by on a fork truck and I was done for. Dopey smile the whole way to lunch cuz Jason had arrived for his shift. So I texted my mom during lunch telling her, “...I hate that an orange ballcap can bring such a dopey grin to my face. An orange ballcap going by on a fork truck. Yep. I have a biiiiiig problem!!” And she just texted back laughing at me! 

I’d also been trying to figure out how I could find out his last name without being weird about it. Had finally settled on I’d ask my buddy on second shift if he’d be able to do some sleuthing for me. He’s crushing majorly on one of the guys on my shift, so I figured Brandon would be my go to to find info out for me and not judge me on it. Well, I walked into the building tonight, clocked in, and glanced to the first shift time cards and there, right in front, nothing blocking it from view, was a time card that said Jason Stobaugh and I went, “AH! O.O” Some how my piss poor brain instantly memorized that spelling even though I’m dyslexic and horrible at spelling to begin with. But that I was spelling to myself the whole night, including to the point of writing Alyssa Stobaugh on the back of my load sheet. Yeah, I sunk that low. LOL! But, later, I saw a list of birthdays for September up in the lunch room and there was another Jason listed, so, I wasn’t sure which was him until after I got back to the cooler and was working a bit and one of the first shift cleaning guys came in and was talking to me and I just casually was like, “Oh hey, Tyler. What’s Jason’s last name?” Tyler kinda looked at me like I was nuts for a second and then went, “Uh, I know it starts with a S, but I’m not sure what it is. ...whyyyyy?” I played it cool and shrugged and went, “I’m just curious. I know your last name, and a few other people’s last names on first back here, but hell, I didn’t even know his name was Jason until I’d heard someone call him that. So, I was just curious.” I fiiiiiiinally have a bit more info on my adorable, quiet Jason! Sadly, I’ve already looked, if he has a facebook page, he has it hidden. Cuz of the four or five that pop up with that name, none of them are him. 

He spent most of the night running shipments into the freezer, but oh God, the few times he came into the cooler were basically the highlight of my utterly sleep deprived night. No, no, correction, getting to talk to him and make him smile and laugh again were the highlights of my night! I’m seriously making it my life goal to make him smile and laugh every day. Thus, I am never skipping work again. Ever. I was almost afraid tonight I wouldn’t get to talk to him, not even just our usual passing off labels and being all, “Here ya go,” “Thanks.” BUT! I got my chance when I knew shipments had come in and he was putting stuff away, so I figured he’d be the person to ask about a product the computer was telling me was a markout (nowhere in the warehouse, whatsoever) before I did anything with it. So, as he was starting to leave the cooler, I kinda stepped up with the paper in my hand I had the product info written down on and went, “Hey Jason!” He stopped and waited and oh sweet Jesus! Lemme tell you! I’mma tell you a thing here! I cannot for the life of me make and keep eye contact with people while I’m talking to them. I can’t do it. I get all shifty and uncomfortable and awkward, right? I zeroed in on those eyes and got ‘em locked in and good Lord his eyes are to fucking die for!!! Especially out from behind his glasses (he hadn’t put them back on yet after having been in the freezer). Oh fuck me please???? I dunno how, but I kept my eyes locked to his the entire time I asked him if he’d gotten a shipment of the FairLife 2% milk in. At first all I got was a headshake and closed mouth “hm-uh” which was almost a disappointment until I had kinda started to nod and turn back for the computer and heard him go, “We were supposed to get one last week, I think, but because of the hurricanes a lot of our shipments are being delayed. So, we should be getting it maybe next week I think?” The fact that I remember what he told me is rather surprising considering how in my head all I kept screaming was, “HOW ARE YOUR EYES SO FUCKING GORGEOUS?! HOW IS THIS FAIR?!?! THIS ISN’T FAIR!! OMG YOU’RE SAYING QUITE A BIT TO ME! DON’T BE A DOOF, LYSSA! DON’T BE A DOOF!!!” I nodded and started to scoot out of his way so he could get by me and turned it into kind of a little playful dance thing as I spun back around to face him again going, “Oh hey! My favorite words then! Markout!” Which got me my first laugh and smile of the night as he nodded and continued heading out. 

Then later I needed product pulled down for my guys to pick from like, right the fuck now, so I didn’t have time to run out and get our backstocker guy to pull it down. I’d seen Jason come in to put some more stuff away so I went hurrying to his fork truck, waited for him to finish before I caught his attention again.

“Hey Jason? Could I maybe borrow you for just a second, please?”

He stopped and looked over at me and was like, “Sure. What’cha need?”

“Could I get you to pull some muffins down for me just real quick?”

“Yeah, absolutely.”

Now, I hadn’t wanted to ask him to do that for me cuz I knew he was busy and honestly, the first and last time I’d asked him to pull product down for me was moooooooooooonths ago and he kinda made a big deal about it (to be fair, he was new -- I think... -- and was busy trying to get his own stuff done at the time). So we headed into the “muffin room”, I pointed out which one needed to be pulled down and I stood there and waited until he brought the pallet down and put it in its spot, I thanked him, “Thank you very much, Jason.” 

“Yeah, not a problem.” Got a bit of a smile and off he went.

And there’s me, standing in front of this pallet of lemon cakes, fighting back the urge to grin like a massive idiot as I pulled a couple boxes loose, clutched them to my chest and went scurrying back to my computer and what I’d been stacking at the time. I think next time I brave to ask him to pull something down for me, I’mma walk right up to his fork truck, fold my arms over the side of it, rest my chin on my arms and look up at him. Just to see what kind of reaction I get. :D 

Honestly, with as sleep deprived as I was tonight, my filters were down pretty damn low. I don’t know how I didn’t do something ridiculous like call him darlin’ or something, which I tend to call everyone back in the cooler dear or darlin’. I almost did! I was once again waiting as he was putting some product away, mostly just watching him but making it look like I was paying attention to what he was doing and everything so I knew where he was going so I didn’t risk stepping behind him while he was backing up or something. And for a while my guys were constantly in his way. They were leaving carts in the middle of aisles, stepping out in front of him or just walking backwards and not paying any attention at all as he was trying to get back out again. So, when he finally noticed me and motioned that I could scoot by him, I did and went, “Da---dude, I am so sorry my guys keep getting in your way, today!” WHICH earned me smile and laugh number two as he shook his head and went, “You’re fine. Don’t worry about it.” 

I was legit so sleep deprived that I was changing the lyrics to “I Want Candy” and “Hey Mickey” to “I want Jason” and “Oh Jason you so fine, you so fine you blow my mind, hey Jason! Hey Jason!” and was singing them out loud to myself. I’m sure someone had to have heard me. Luckily, no one said anything about it. I could have easily have asked him if he was single or for his phone number and probably not have batted an eye or even kicked myself later for it, I was that sleep deprived. I didn’t though. Dunno how, but I didn’t.

My favorite pastime now has become Jason watching. I ain’t even sorry, but man, it’s gonna get me into trouble one of these days. Literally any time he came into the cooler I basically stopped what I was doing to watch him and get this dopey, silly grin on my face. I was stacking a truck and he came in. He was in the other aisle. I couldn’t even really see him just his fork truck and I stopped and watched and giggled and got all goofy feeling inside. And my favorite part was when he’d brought a pallet of milk in to restock and it was too tall to fit wherever he had wanted to put it so he’s trying to pull these crates and cases of milk off the top...dude is only freakin’ 5ft5 at most. I swear me and him are exact same height. I swore he was gonna drop one of those cases on his head! He looked so silly and adorable stretching on his toes to reach crates and his fingers just brushing over them cuz he was just that much too short to really reach them. Oh God, I couldn’t stop laughing. It was just so damned cute! 

Anyway, so, towards the end of the night, we were basically done picking and I was scrambling to get things checked since management decided to be dumbasses once again and needlessly sent me newbies who didn’t know what was happening and everything. Well, newbies done fucked shit up is what they did. So, I was trying to get one of the stops straightened out when I heard the printer start going off next to me again. Look over, and there’s Jason’s labels getting printed. I started folding them and went, “Fuck it. Jason, you’re adorable, but I’m not doing this right now.” So I let them drop and tried to continue, except they kept printing and printing and I was like, “GUH! FINE!” Dropped what I was doing and quickly started folding them -- all while my buddy Josh is standing there next to me laughing at my struggle to get them folded and my mutterings about Jason being adorable as fuck and he was lucky he was so damned cute. I’d confessed to Josh earlier in the shift about how my mom was laughing at me cuz I’m such a coward and how I’ve seemed to developed quite the crush on “the first shift receiving supervisor”. In fact, apparently my desire to not let half the department know about this was forgotten by me today in my sleep deprivation as Josh was in fact the second person I’d told about it. First was the stacker on second shift and she gave me such a look that I regretted telling her. Anyway, so, I got the labels folded up and set aside, got back to doing my stuff when Jason rolls in on his fork truck, disappears down an aisle, and a minute or two later starts back out again. I grabbed the stack of labels, jumped over the cart that was in my way and went darting after him. “JASON!” He stopped, turned, I held ‘em out and in our true way, had our typical, “Here ya go!” “Oh, thanks!” “Yup! No prob!” He didn’t even know they were printed. His assistant had printed them. Well, I was sick of assistant boy coming in to get them. Every time I heard the door open after labels had been printed, I’d look back all smiles and see it wasn’t Jason I’d get all disappointed. 

I didn’t see him much after that, but then again, I was also busy trying to get shit stacked cuz the rest of the warehouse was waiting on us again. So, eventually, freezer/cooler crew all got sentenced to cleaning the freezer, except for me. I had to keep stacking. So, I kept stacking and singing to myself and dancing around a bit. And I don’t remember if it was while I was working on stacking, or after the last truck had been taken out and I was doing some clean up of my own that I heard the printer start up again and sure enough, more of Jason’s labels were printed. And, being alone in the cooler, I was cool with talking to myself, so I was like, “I swear to God, if he comes in here, it’s gonna be really hard not to go, ‘Ah, the sunshine of my day!’” And no sooner had I said that, that the cooler door opened, I looked under the rack, and there were these short legs scurrying in and I just got even more dopey cuz fuck yeah! Me and him were alone in the cooler! I WAS GONNA FUCKING TALK TO HIM! So I did. He grabbed his labels and started to leave so I went, “So’s it gonna be another 16hr day for you today?” And he stopped in his tracks, turned and got this big grin and laughed, shrugged and made a show of thinking for a second and went, “Eh, maybe only about a 14 hour day, today.” 

“Hey! That works!” 

“Yeah, ya know, shave a couple hours off, it’s not so bad.” And then I couldn’t fucking believe it, but he reversed course and started walking over to where I was standing so we could joke a bit more about the long hours. So I asked him if Wednesday ended up being a 16hr day like he’d feared it was gonna be, which got another adorable thinky face before, “Actually, I think it was fifteen and a half.” Which got me laughing and shrugged and went, “Hey! It wasn’t sixteen! That’s a whole half-hour less than you thought!” And mooooooore laughter from him. God, I’m fucking addicted to his laughter and smiles! And I’m so glad it was just us in there cuz I’m not sure if he would have come over if anyone else was there. Plus, I felt so damned special, I guess, that he took even just the minute or two we spent joking about the hours together out of his day to come over to me instead of stand at the edge of the racking he’d been when I called out to him at first. It felt like a great end to my day, and it was. Except I got to see him oooooooooooooone last time before I left! 

Was heading out with a dumpster, my gear in hand and half blind cuz my glasses were fogged up. The main door rolled up, I started out with the dumpster just as he was heading in with his fork truck. He reversed course so I could head out and scoot past and our eyes met a couple times before I just smiled and went, “Have a good weekend, Jason!” And even though he had his freezer gear on so half his face was covered from his freezer mask, I saw his eyes brighten and crinkle in the corners so I knew he was smiling again and got, “Thanks! You too!” 

And it has occurred to me that, I know his name now for sure, but I don’t know as though he actually knows mine. So, Monday I’mma fix that. Not entirely sure how yet, no doubt in some way that’ll make him laugh, probably hold his stack of labels out to him and then yank them back real quick and be like, “Ya know, it dawned on me Friday that I know your name cuz I heard someone call you one day, but I’ve never actually introduced myself to you. Hi. I’m Alyssa.” Just so maybe, MAYBE, I can finally hear him say my name. I may also hang a sign above my head that says, “You’re beautiful. Will you marry me? I love you!” ...no no...maybe not that. Though, I’m horrible at this whole flirting thing, and even worse at figuring out when someone is flirting with me, so, I’m not exactly sure how to go about getting my point across of, “Hey, I think you’re attractive. I’d really like to get to know you, please?” without it crossing into the whole sexual harassment area at work. If we still had the “Share a Coke” bottles in the break room, I’d buy one that says “Jason” and leave it back on his computer with a note: To help you get through another 16hr day! But...I dunno...I don’t wanna embarrass him and I don’t wanna seem weird. Especially since I still don’t know if he’s completely unattached to anyone yet or not. God I hope he is. I really, really hope he is. 

If you managed to get this far, does anyone have any clues or tips on how to find out? I don’t know what to do!