#hilde and arueshalae

[rollofleaf]

9 Ship Songs

Tagged by @dujour13 Thanks for the tag! I've never actually done one of these before and it was harder than I thought. This is all for Hilde and Arueshalae, and here's the link to the playlist. https://open.spotify.com/playlist/7LCOi4ox8QqSatqK7cvWP3?si=3b532b38867c40eb

For extra flavor, I like to imagine Hilde has actually written and sung most of these about/to Arue.

There She Goes - Sixpence None the Richer

This has the vibes of both of them at the other when they realize how hopelessly in love they are, I can see Hilde actually singing this with Arue in mind.

There she goes There she goes again She calls my name Holds my brain No one else could heal my pain And I just can't contain This feeling that remains

Stay With Me - Miki Matsubara

Specific vibes of Arueshalae when she's struggling her hardest to hold herself back and not hurt Hilde, desperately yearning while knowing she can't have her.

Stay with me... In the dead of night I’m banging on your door I’m begging you, without you I’m done for Now the winter arrived, like the tears in our eyes, Stay with me... While your voice remains an echo of the past I'm holding on to moments that won’t last I will never forget, I will never regret our love

When the Sun Loves the Moon - Reinaeiry

I think this sums up everything about their love pretty well, especially before redemption.

When the sun loves the moon, Even the ocean feels her pull Oh, and the stars align every night To spell out their love in tiny bright lights Oh, when the sun loves the moon Never touching but never far

Black is the Color - Cara Dillon

I can see Hilde humming and singing this to herself thinking about Arue...

Black is the color of my true love's hair Her lips are like a rose so fair She's got the sweetest face and gentlest hands I love the ground whereon she stands I love my love and well she knows I love the ground whereon she goes And how I wish the day would come Where she and I could be as one

Orpheus – Sarah Bareilles

Arueshalae begging Hilde to give up her demonic powers vibes.

Don't stop Trying to find me here amidst the chaos Though I know it's blinding There's a way out Say out loud We will not give up on love now No fear Don't you turn like Orpheus Just stay here Hold me in the dark and when the day appears We'll say We did not give up on love today

Where We Belong – Xenoblade Chronicles 3

For whatever reason this got stuck in my head specifically for the more bittersweet moments like Arueshalae burning her dreams.

I see you peacefully, you’re in your dreams, Everything seems calm and free, I know, If we want this warmth to last, forever again, let’s go back to that day. I see you smiling there, so peacefully, And cheerfully talking at me These happy days must carry on So once again, let's go back to the start This goodbye is not the end, I know, until we meet again, Our feelings will remain the same Together as one, till we find ourselves again…

Dancing in the Moonlight - Olivia Klug

A little more cheerful, this sounds like something Hilde would sing for Arueshalae on a quiet night outside, maybe dance with her a little to.

Everybody was dancing in the moonlight Dancing in the moonlight Everybody's feeling warm and bright It's such a fine and natural sight Everybody's dancing in the moonlight Everybody here is out of sight

You Are the Moon - The Hush Sound

Hilde desperately trying to get Arueshalae to love herself and see the same beauty Hilde sees in her.

You don't see what you possess A beauty calm and clear It floods the sky and blurs the darkness like a chandelier All the light that you possess is skewed by lakes and seas The shattered surface, so imperfect, is all that you believe I will bring a mirror, so silver, so exact So precise and so pristine, a perfect pane of glass I will set the mirror up to face the blackened sky You will see your beauty every moment that you rise

Must be Dreaming - Bien

I can see both of them singing this at alternate times when they're really lovestruck.

I must be dreaming, dreaming It's too good to be true, too good to be true I must be dreaming, dreaming 'Cause all I see is you, all I see is you I must be dreaming, dreaming It's too good to be true, too good to be true I must be dreaming, dreaming 'Cause all I see is you, all I see is you

Tagging @tenmillionbees , @turbulentpumpkin43 , and @cassynite

[milk-crafting]

Commission for @rollofleaf of her knight commander Hilde sharing a tender moment with Arueshalae

[starlightcleric]

My Secret Santa gift for @rollofleaf, Coffee Shop AU Hilde and Arueshalae!

[rollofleaf]

This is giving me so many ideas for writing (I'm forever going to be kicking myself that my big Hilde/Arue fic was my first major writing project and therefore the worst thing I've ever written that I'm never going to be satisfied with until I inevitably go back and rewrite it). I'm very surprised to see her redemption is handled even better by the original AP than it is by Owlcat (for whatever reason I always thought Arue was kind of a footnote in the AP). I love the idea of her actually having to perform specific penances to address her wrongdoings, and I think that coupled with the way Owlcat handled it as her having to realize she is in fact deserving of love would be so good.

Also, the idea that she can still give an (altered) profane gift is so good. Making that bond with her love, and it also kinda protects them from other succubi since a mortal can only have one profane gift. And then the sexual healing down the line... I do think it's kind of funny that in game, Arue does fulfill several of the listed penances already.

i bought a pathfinder campaign book just to read 2 pages of info about arueshalae, so here's some stuff i found interesting

* all art and screenshots here are taken from the pathfinder adventure path book "demon's heresy" by jim groves

• not including desna's butterfly on her chest in the game art is a huge L. just look how cute she is

• part of her backstory - i'm not well-versed enough in pathfinder universe lore to analyze the connection sarenrae could have had to desna's decision to spare arueshalae, but it's still quite interesting. also, does that mean that arue dared to dream before being noticed by desna??? the wording here is curious

awwww

• her stats are insane

• she still has an altered version of her profane gift

redeemed arueshalae can quite literally kiss it better. that would have been incredibly op in the game, so i understand the decision not to add it, but how fucking cool is that. healing sex yay

• her redemption is dependent on penance system, and it heavily favors the aid from good-aligned characters and followers of desna

her path is quite fragile, too.

• she struggles with prejudice and distrust from crusaders even after her redemption

• the woman fought her inner demons so hard she became a magnet for will-o'-wisps. lol

[silversiren1101]

💎💎💎 for Hilde from Mino! I’m eager to see her thoughts :3

Minovae grins widely, a sense of almost fiery pride in her eyes.

"Hilde! Now that's a woman after my own heart!", she happily asserts.

"And I'm not just talking about her physical strength, but her emotional strength. Her will. Do you know how hard it is to have strength and power and give it up? She chose her own path, even after going through darkness and horrors beyond most people's comprehension, and she did it for love. Arueshalae is blessed to have her by her side, forevermore. They both make each other better. Together."

Minovae nods, an approving smirk on her face. "I see a lot of similarities between us. She's got a strength of character I don't think most could ever come close to, and fights as fiercely as she loves. She's fun to be around during the good times, and I'm honored to call her an ally--hopefully a friend!"

She sighs.

"Still, I know she doesn't think highly of Hellknights and the law. Like most, I wish she did at least care for the law and what holds our society together with at least a veneer of peace and civility. You can't just do things because you want to, or ignore the laws you don't care about. I know it comes from a good place... but... "

Her tail just rattle then, softly. She rolls her eyes, a bit cheeky. "That being said, the anger issues... well I can't fault a skald or barbarian or bloodrager for being a bit on the impulsive side, susceptible to their emotions. Hilde works hard though, and when the rage clears there's a clarity and good-conscience there. She just needs to make sure she fixes whatever she broke when lost in the haze. Arue helps with that, surely, but... well a bit more sense of responsibility would be nice."

[rollofleaf]

Beach day for Hilde and Arueshalae! Art done by @selianne_ on Twitter. I adore their swimsuits so much...

[rollofleaf]

Gorgeous art of Arueshalae and Hilde by @darkergrey ! I adore both their designs and the emotion in the scene is sooo good! I also wrote a short little thing for the scene this inspired.

“Wait, Hilde. Before your decision becomes final… Look me in the eye. Please.” Arueshalae worked up the courage to stand, it felt like pushing a mountain off her back.

Nocticula hissed out, “Arueshalae, shut your whorish mouth…” Her claws came out, and the succubus brought all of her willpower to bear against the order for her to kneel.

Suddenly, light chased away the oppressive demand of the Abyss as Iomedae spoke. “Allow her to speak. Or do the words of one succubus frighten you so, Lady in Shadow?” The faintest hint of a smirk tugged at the goddess’s lips as Nocticula clicked her tongue and fell silent.

Arueshalae felt Nocticula’s threatening gaze on her, and Iomedae’s judgmental stare. She didn’t belong with either of them. But neither did Hilde. She finally realized. She and Hilde were the same. She had been where Hilde was going, they were both halfway on the precipice between the Abyss and Elysium. Only she was rising, slowly but surely, and Hilde was descending. No matter what the skald said, no matter what she believed, if she kept going she would become as horrible as Arueshalae used to be.

Hilde slowly turned to look at Arueshalae. Her eyes were sorrowful, her voice soft and timid. The succubus spoke, forcing each word out. “You’ve done so much for me, Hilde. You’ve helped me find my dreams and make peace with my nightmares… Desna showed me the path away from evil, but you are the one who showed me the path towards good. And after all you’ve done for me, I… I just can’t accept that you’re going to become a monster of the Abyss!”

“Arueshalae, I… I’m not. I’m using this for good. Why can’t you… Why can’t anyone see that? I’m fixing the Worldwound! I’m doing more than any holy-blooded crusader has in a century!” Anger and indignation crept into her voice, falling away as she saw the crestfallen look on Arueshalae’s face.

“You said that before these powers, your rage was like a graceful trance. Every battle was a delicate hymn woven with sword and magic, a terrifying yet beautiful prayer to Gorum. Can you truly say it’s the same now? I see how you are when the demon comes out. There’s no joy, no elegance, no awe, only rage and hate. Every time you indulge it, it grows stronger. And you manage to turn it towards good ends, because you’re so wonderful and so strong like that, but how long can that last? You yourself asked me to tell you if you started to lose yourself. Hilde, I am telling you that you are losing yourself.”

Her hand took Hilde’s gently, squeezing with delicate burning fingers. The demon snarled at the upstart succubus, did she truly believe her own delusions of good? Hilde forced it down, biting back any venom that might be directed at Arueshalae. But she still couldn’t… “I can’t just… Give it up. Maybe I am becoming a monster, but I’m too far-“

“No, you’re not. You can always turn back. You can always choose to be better. You showed me that. Back… Back then, you said that you loved me…” Her voice dimmed, terrified to let out the words before she gathered her courage and nearly shouted. “I need you to know that I love you too! Let everyone know, gods, mortals, and demons, I love you, Hilde! And it’s breaking my heart to see this happen to you. Please, free yourself of the Abyss, I’m begging you! I’ll help, I’ll be there for you! Like you helped me…”

The words hit Hilde like a thunderbolt, nearly staggering her back. Arueshalae… Loved her? Tears welled in the skald’s eyes, flowing down her bloodstained cheeks. She glanced down at her hand, clutched in Arueshalae’s. Arueshalae was right. She hadn’t even realized how far she’d gone. And she was hurting her friends, her crusade, and the woman she loved. If she kept going, there would be no turning back. She was trying so hard to help Arueshalae be better, she had forgotten to do the same herself. What a fool she was…

Hilde began to laugh softly, then broke into crying. Her voice was shaky as she calmed herself and spoke, squeezing Arueshalae’s hand back, “You… You’re right, Arueshalae. You’re right. I’m sorry. For everything. You deserved an azata or an angel. Not a demon…” She slowly let go of Arueshalae’s hand and turned back to Iomedae and Nocticula. “I’m sorry, I…” She let out a brief sob and wiped her eyes. “Iomedae… I’ll accept your help. Tell me how to strip myself of these powers and cleanse myself of the Abyss’s influence.”

[rollofleaf]

In the mood to post about them…

[rollofleaf]

Owlcatober Day 2: Fake Names

Day 2, give it up for day 2! A short bit with Hilde, originally this was going to be part of the Dance of Masks fic and it does still lead into that. I am working on that, just not while I'm doing these monthly challenges.

Queen Galfrey chose to stay behind while the rest went to the festival. Hilde had to order Anevia and Irabeth along; the two tried to refuse the respite they desperately needed. The trip to Kenabres took two uneventful days, and two nights that Arueshalae spent curled up tight in the arms of her Hilde. The camp was too intimate for them to be comfortable with sex, especially when Arueshalae knew she wouldn’t be able to keep quiet. She didn’t mind, cuddling inside a warm sleeping bag pressed against Hilde’s flushed skin brought her all the bliss she could ever want. Aivu joined them, sleeping with her head on their bag like an enormous puppy and very happy to be traveling outside of Drezen.

Arueshalae awoke on the third morning to find herself alone. A brief pang of loneliness hit her, swiftly dimmed by the sound of Hilde’s voice outside. Nenio’s followed, a collected, “How about that? Do you approve?”

“It’s perfect. Thank you, Nenio!” Hilde’s voice rang out again, just outside the tent. Arueshalae slipped on a vest and some pants and poked her head out. Nenio was sitting next to a woman who was looking at herself in the mirror. The woman’s form shimmered for a brief instant as she looked at Arueshalae and grinned. “Oh, Arueshalae, good morning!” She had Hilde’s voice, but her skin was lighter, her eyes were a deep brown, and her hair was a vibrant platinum blonde. The illusion wrapped around Hilde didn’t hide her freckles or the scar over her nose, though.

Arueshalae looked at her with some confusion. “O-oh! Good morning. Um, why do you look like a human? A very lovely human,” she couldn’t help but add.

Hilde shrugged and looked back. “I think I’m going to go to the festival like this. If it’s really in my honor, then showing up as myself will just be… I won’t get a moment alone. I won’t get to enjoy it as myself, I’ll just be a symbol swarmed by people. I miss being a normal person, not the Knight Commander.”

Arueshalae squatted down next to Hilde and Nenio, a pensive look coming over her face. “Maybe I should do that too…” She looked down at her own tail as it twitched and curled gently around Hilde’s wrist. “I’ve changed, but… Most people probably won’t see that. They’ll still just see the monster. Oh, but disguising myself feels too much like deception!”

Nenio briefly glanced up, then went back to studying the ring she was imbuing with the illusion. “I’m not implying you haven’t redeemed yourself, but I might caution against a disguise. Statistically, you are far more likely to suffer violence if someone sees through your illusion than Hilde is. Far, far more likely.”

“That’s… True. M-maybe I just shouldn’t go. I wouldn’t want to cause a scene or scare people or-“ Arueshalae paused as Hilde tapped her tail twice. Their little code that Arueshalae was getting in her head and starting to spiral. Hilde’s signal for her to stop, breathe, and clear her head. She did as she was asked, closing her eyes and sucking in a few breaths through her teeth. “S-sorry. No, I… I should go as myself. My true, honest self, shown to the world.” 

She let out a squeak as Hilde planted a kiss on her cheek. “There’s my brave Arueshalae… As for me… I think I’ll be going as, um, shit, help me think of a fake name.”

Arueshalae tilted her head. “Um… Why? Oh, I suppose you’d be recognized by your name. Hilda, maybe? No, that’s too obvious. Edlih! It’s Hilde backwards! Also too obvious?”

Nenio chimed in, “And it doesn’t sound like a normal name. Perhaps, was there a name you were almost given as a child?”

Hilde sighed. “Yes, but those were all boy’s names. Oh! Nenio, could you make the illusion look a bit more Varisian? I’ll be Esmerelda today!”

“Esmerelda… That name sounds familiar.” Arueshalae sat down, wracking her brain for any mention Hilde had made of such a person.

Hilde answered quickly with a grin. “Esmerelda was the woman that let me travel with her caravan when I left home. She was kind of like my mom for a few years… No doubt she’s gone now, but I’m sure she wouldn’t mind me borrowing her identity a little! So there’s a name that has some meaning to me.”

[rollofleaf]

Owlcatober Day 21: Dance

Back to this! The world could always use more Hilde and Arue...

Hilde groaned with exhaustion as she plopped down at her seat in the Defender’s Heart. It had been a long day at the festival. All that socializing was already exhausting for her, and being kidnapped and having to fight Razmirans had just drained her further. Then tomorrow she had to make good on her promise and hunt the wizard down. But that was a problem for tomorrow. For now, she could relax with her best friends. Aivu was sadly too large to comfortably fit through the door to the tavern, so she had to resort to sticking her head in through the window.

She took a bite out of a sweet bun and leaned back. It was nice to be able to take a load off. Aranka, Thall, Ilkes, Sosiel, and Woljif were up on stage playing as an impromptu band. Aranka’s voice was beautiful and she was an expert at the harp, Thall was awkwardly leaning against the back of the stage and tapping away at a cymbal, Sosiel was on drums, Ilkes had a violin, and Woljif had a lute. Hilde smiled warmly. Woljif had come up to her a few months ago and asked her to teach him to play. Seeking a hobby and way to make money outside of thieving, so he claimed. He was getting quite good! The group were playing a pleasant, upbeat tune that had half of the tavern dancing.

Arueshalae came to sit next to Hilde, cuddling up to her side with a pleased sigh. “Hello, my love. I’m surprised you aren’t up on stage performing.”

Hilde shrugged. “It’s tempting, but I think for once I’d rather be here. After all, you can’t dance with someone if you’re part of the band.”

“But… You aren’t dancing with anyone.” Arueshalae’s head tilted questioningly.

“Not yet. I was waiting for you.” The aasimar winked cheekily.

A blush bloomed on Arueshalae’s face as Hilde extended a hand. She looked away bashfully. “I mean, I… I don’t really dance. Not since I was a proper demon, and those were a very different type of dance.”

“Want to know a secret?” Hilde leaned in and winked conspiratorially. Arueshalae leaned in to listen. “I don’t know how to dance either. Let’s learn together!”

Arueshalae giggled. “You’re fibbing.” She still looked shy about the prospect, but less so.

“Well, it’s half true. I don’t know how to dance like a Mendevian.“ 

Another soft laugh came in response. Reluctantly, Arueshalae took Hilde’s hand and stood. “Alright, I’ll… I’ll try.”

They walked along the floor where some others were dancing. Hilde guided Arueshalae’s hands to her shoulders and put hers on the succubus’s hips.

Arueshalae blushed from her cheeks to her ears. “Hilde… People are watching…” 

Hilde flashed her a smile that had her walking on clouds. “Ignore them. Right now, the world is just you, me, and the music.”

Arueshalae’s cheeks burned scarlet. But try as she might, she couldn’t shake the nervousness from the eyes on her. “I… I can’t…”

Hilde let out a soft chuckle and held Arueshalae close. Their hips swayed gently in rhythm to the music, though Arueshalae was too shy to do any more. Hilde smiled at her beloved. “Don’t worry about it, we do only what you’re comfortable with. Are… Are you okay? I know a lot’s happened today, and I’m sorry you-”

“It’s not your fault, Hilde.”

“I could have been more careful.”

“Even if you were, it might not have prevented it. It’s alright. None of us got hurt, at least not badly.” She could see the guilt in Hilde’s shimmering eyes. The poor woman always took everything on her shoulders. It was rather familiar…

“I’m glad. If something happened to you…” Hilde shook the malaise off and put on a smile. “Sorry, don’t mean to be a downer. Sharing a cell with Daeran though, that couldn’t have been fun!” She chuckled softly at her own little joke.

Arueshalae broke into a giggle. That got her to loosen up a little, and she looked over Hilde’s shoulder to share a brief glance with Daeran, who was in the middle of his own dance with a few admirers. “Actually… It wasn’t so bad. I think we understand each other better now.” 

“Oh, that’s a surprise! A good one.” Hilde grinned. Arueshalae seemed more at ease now, so she moved a little bit past the simple swaying of hips. Arueshalae’s tail began to swish as she finally felt comfortable shaking her rear a little bit. Hilde giggled along with her, the two dancing together as the music began to pick up.

Arueshalae was slow and a little bit awkward, but she found her footing soon. There was still embarrassment in Hilde’s kind of dancing, the shaking of her hips and showing off her curves, but she enjoyed it. The energy, the closeness, it all left her in a happy daze. The two grew more frantic, taking each other’s hands and twirling around as they fell into the music. Others moved back to make way for them as the rest of the world fell away. There was nothing but Hilde, Arueshalae, and the music they danced to.

Arueshalae’s cheeks flushed as Hilde laid one hand on her hip and the other on her back. Hilde didn’t have experience with traditional ballroom dancing, but there was one thing she had always wanted to do. Slowly, she tipped Arueshalae back, holding her and lowering her into a dip. Arueshalae’s cheeks flushed scarlet as Hilde leaned into her, pressing their lips together in a warm kiss. Arueshalae’s ruby eyes were full of stars and awe as they opened after the kiss. Hilde held her there, savoring the moment. Both whispered in unison, “You’re beautiful…”

Hilde burst out with a loving giggle, pressing a kiss to Arueshalae’s nose. “I adore you. So, how do you like dancing?”

Arueshalae grinned back at her and hugged her tight. “I’m starting to love it… But it has made me even more eager for our date. We still haven’t gone there.” She looked aside, winking at Aranka.

Aranka grinned as her voice trailed off. “Thank you, all. This will be our last song, then we have another engagement!”

Hilde glanced between the two. “Another…?”

Arueshalae let out a laugh. “Oh, I’m sorry, I wanted to keep it secret! I may have made some plans for our date. So, one more dance, then we go?”

Hilde picked her up with a smile and they got back to dancing. “One more dance, then we go.”

[rollofleaf]

Owlcatober Day 15: Flying

Took the prompt a little loosely today, but I've had this idea for a few weeks and could not get it out of my head. A slight rewrite of Hilde shaking off Nocticula's profane gift.

Hilde had done it! Arueshalae had been granted only the briefest moments of relief as Hilde rejected her power, rejected the Abyss. Then her choice was stolen from her. She watched helplessly as Nocticula stood over her, the profane gift she had given Hilde now bending the aasimar to her will.

“You’re so lucky you have me to set you right… Now come to your senses and obey. Embrace your gift.” The demon lord’s tail flicked idly as she looked down at Hilde with mild annoyance.

Hilde gasped for air, clutching her heart as she tried to fight off the overwhelming force compelling her to obey. “S-stop… Y-you said you wouldn’t invade my thoughts or control me! Get out of my head!” The ‘gift’ wracked her body further and she collapsed to the ground. “P-please.” A desperate whimper fell from her lips as agony filled her body, like Arueshalae herself had done to so many mortals.

“Maybe I would have kept that promise if you had been a good girl and helped me!” A sadistic smirk came to Nocticula’s silk lips.

Arueshalae’s heart wrenched as she saw Hilde struggle. She was frozen in terror, unable to act. Even though she had come so far, some demonic instinct in her refused to fight Nocticula. Arueshalae was little better than the succubus queen’s servant now, unable to even raise a hand to help the woman she loved.

Do you truly believe that? You’re so much more than her pawn. Words floated into her mind, a gentle ephemeral titter prodding at her thoughts. The succubus perked up, what was that voice. Then she remembered. What do you dream of? It was the same voice. It was Her.

D-desna…? She thought to herself. She felt the mental impression of a smile in response. P-please, h-help her! I can’t do anything! I… I can’t help Hilde. Tears streamed down the succubus’s face as she tried to force herself to move, but Nocticula’s overwhelming presence held her still.

I can’t do anything to help, but you can. She has no power over you except that which you give her. So then, Arueshalae. Arueshalae held her breath as she waited for the question. Are you just going to stand there and let your beloved be dragged down to the Abyss?

Arueshalae trembled. She clenched her fists. No. No, she wouldn’t. She couldn’t. Perhaps it was her own will, perhaps it was support from the Dreamer, but she felt Nocticula’s oppressive aura become less and less stifling. The courage that filled her being when she confessed her love to Hilde came rushing back. She wouldn’t let Hilde have this choice stolen from her. Her Hilde had chosen to leave the Abyss behind, and Arueshalae would support her however she could. She shot Seelah a look. The paladin seemed similarly frozen before the demon lord, her gaze flitting between Iomedae, Hilde, and Nocticula in reverence, concern, and fear. She caught Arueshalae’s look and nodded. The succubus braced herself and Seelah’s hand slipped to her sword.

“Goddess, guide our blades!” Seelah called out to the heavens, holy light surrounding Nocticula and spreading out to Arueshalae and the rest. A flush came over her cheeks with the realization that her Goddess was standing only a few meters away from her, seemingly caught off guard but answering the prayer instinctively.

Arueshalae wasted no time, sprinting up the steps of the temple. She felt Desna at her back lifting her wings to soar and Seelah’s holy magic illuminating her target. She acted on instinct, shouting at Nocticula as she punched her square in the jaw. “Leave my Hilde ALONE!” To both of their shock, that actually seemed to hurt the demon lord. Nocticula stumbled back, gasping and clutching her jaw.

“You… You little bitch, how dare you! That actually hurt!” There was the faintest waver in Nocticula’s voice. Such a lowly creature as Arueshalae shouldn’t even have been able to harm her, even with that paladin’s aid. She looked back at the succubus, glaring at her with her usual overwhelming presence that commanded obedience from her demons. She saw only defiance and hope in Arueshalae’s ruby eyes.

Arueshalae grit her teeth, emboldened against the monster that had caused her and Hilde so much pain. Hilde managed to look up at her, catching her gaze. Despite her pain, the aasimar’s eyes were wide and starry with awe at Arueshalae. She fought past the embarrassment on her cheeks and focused on Nocticula. “You said you would respect her choice, Lady in Shadow. Release her. Now! Let her be free, like she chose to! Or we will make you!”

Seelah stood up and walked next to Arueshalae, her sword leveled at Nocticula in support. Nenio soon stood up as well.

Ember stared at Nocticula with sickeningly innocent doe eyes. “Please, miss. Let her go.” 

Iomedae sighed and floated slightly forward. “I believe you have overstayed your welcome, demon. I shall not force you back to the Abyss, but they might.”

Nocticula growled and tensed up like a panther about to pounce. She reached out a hand towards Hilde. She could crush the girl’s heart right now, punish her fully for her disobedience. But it wasn’t worth it. “How dare… Ugh, fine! Worthless, idiotic mortals! You want to join them so bad, you want to give up power and pleasure so you can get old and die, see if I care!“ With a deadly glare at Arueshalae and a flash of darkness, the demon lord was gone. Iomedae smiled with satisfaction and hovered back. The mortals deserved their moment, especially after what the succubus had done.

The instant Nocticula was gone, Arueshalae’s face drained of color and she dropped to her knees. The fear rushed in to replace the adrenaline as she clutched her chest. “I-I can’t believe I did that… I-I’m not supposed to be able to do that!”

Seelah laughed and clapped her on the back. “Now -that- was something, sister! Hah, ‘your Hilde’…” She gave Arueshalae a wink that made her melt into a blush.

What’s more, she felt Hilde pull herself to her knees and rush forward to hug Arueshalae tightly. She tensed up. She shouldn’t allow such contact, it would only hurt Hilde. But… She wanted it so badly. Her touch, warm through her armor… And somehow, she didn’t feel the usual addictive rush she felt when she drained energy, even accidentally. Seelah spotted Iomedae’s hand raised slightly in a protective gesture and a faint aura around Hilde guarding her from the succubus’ touch, along with a knowing smile from the goddess.

“T-thank you,” Hilde sobbed against her shoulder.

Arueshalae was frozen in fear and panic and a desperate want for this moment of intimacy to stretch out forever. All she could manage was a soft, “Are you okay?” as she grabbed Hilde’s hand on her stomach and entwined their fingers.

“I’m fine. My chest still hurts, but… I’m fine. My head’s more clear than it has been in years. Thank you, Arueshalae.” She seemed to realize she was hugging her and pulling away. “S-sorry.” With a sigh, she stood up to face Iomedae. “Alright, tell me how to cleanse myself of the Abyss’s influence.”

Arueshalae remained there, her hand brushing along her stomach where she had been hugged. She felt like she was soaring. She could feel Desna’s gaze on her again, Hilde had rejected the Abyss, she had stood up to the monster that embodied everything she was trying to break free of, and she was in love. Arueshalae was the closest to happy she had ever felt.

[rollofleaf]

Owlcatober Day 6: Alone

Nenio my beloved, I adore her and wish she had been more than a gag character with a horribly annoying quest.

Nenio let out a long sigh as she finally crested the top of the hill she was walking along. From here she could see for miles across the rolling grasslands of Andoren. She found herself a nice rock and sat down to begin her notes on the local geography. As the kitsune flipped through her encyclopedia, her finger caught along a page. The last page of her section on the Worldwound and the Fifth Crusade, a sort of author’s note due to her close involvement with the events. She paused to read over her own words.

“I must confess to readers of this encyclopedia that some bias has found its way into my heart regarding this subject. I have witnessed this crusade from its beginning to its end and I possess an unrivaled expertise in its workings, successes, and failures. Its Knight Commander, Hilde Shatter-song, is a close personal friend of mine and assisted in several entries earlier in this chapter. It is not the purpose of this encyclopedia to divulge my personal feelings, but such disclosure is necessary.” Below was a sketch she had made of Hilde and her companions on the last day they had all been together. She trailed an affectionate claw over the sketch, feeling the paper crease slightly. Nenio wasn’t normally one for remembering names, but those twelve were an exception.

“Ha, look at that,” she said aloud with a smile to the silent afternoon, “I’m getting sentimental, assis-“ The smile vanished as she glanced to her side. “-tant…” Right. Hilde wasn’t here. She was alone. She was experiencing an unusual emotion. An ache, the distinct impression that something was missing, and profound nostalgia.

She gave herself a quick checkup to make sure the ache wasn’t an injury, then searched through her bags to make sure she wasn’t missing anything. Everything was in order, but the feeling remained. Then an idea sprang to mind and she grabbed one of her many, many notebooks. “Categorization of Common Emotions.” Thanks to the volatility of her memory, she found it helpful to write some things down to easily relearn them if she forgot. She flipped open the book to the first page. “Hilde (assistant, aasimar, azata, commander of 5th crusade) has suggested writing down common emotions I experience to pinpoint unexplained feelings.” Looked normal. She started flipping through the pages, quickly skimming for her symptoms.

At last, she found it. “Loneliness: characterized by nostalgia and the feeling of something missing. Caused by prolonged isolation, or sudden isolation after long periods of being surrounded by friends. Hilde has expressed concern I may experience loneliness after leaving to continue my work. Remedy: spending time with friends.” Well, that explained it. Loneliness… It fit. Nenio didn’t like the feeling.

If time spent with friends was the remedy, that posed a problem. Nenio had moved on. She always moved on. She kept traveling, kept working on her encyclopedia, never stopping for long. She wasn’t even sure how long it had been since the Fifth Crusade. Would they remember her? Were they even alive? She could try to make new friends, but her attempts to do so after leaving Hilde and the others had all met with failure. Something she hadn’t yet determined made her off-putting and unappealing to most people she met. 

But somehow, Nenio felt that making new friends wouldn’t address this aching. Hilde, Arueshalae, and Seelah… It was them she missed. She had grown closer to the three than she thought possible, and was desperately lonely without them. With a heavy heart, Nenio decided this required a true sacrifice. She shut her draft of the Encyclopedia Golarionnica and slipped it in her bag. She was going to take a break from working on it. Just a little sabbatical! She didn’t know where those three were, but she did know where someone that might know was. She flipped through the notes she had made on her companions and started walking east.

Two days later, Nenio arrived at a small village centered around a vineyard. She motioned and waved at the first person she saw, a young boy of perhaps twelve years. “Hey! Hey, boy!” The child stopped and turned towards her. “Are you aware of the whereabouts of a cleric by the name of Sosiel Vaenic?” She was prepared to give him a more detailed description of Sosiel along with a sketch, but the boy nodded.

“You’re weird. Mr. Vaenic’s up by the temple. Bye, weird lady!” He waved as Nenio ran up a hill towards a humble temple to Shelyn, searching around until she found him. Sosiel was wearing a smock rather than armor, and was hard at work painting a mural depicting some of the heroes of the Fifth Crusade.

Nenio called out to him with a grin. “Cleric boy!”

Sosiel paused. “That voice, is that…” He turned around and a grin broke out on his face. “Nenio, it is you! I never thought I’d see you again!”

Nenio nodded. “Yes, it is I. Customary greetings to you as well. I require your assistance with something.”

“Oh, um, of course, happy to help. We can discuss it over tea?”

“Would it be a social faux pas to decline the tea?” Nenio was quite proud of how good she had gotten at socializing with people and avoiding offending them.

“N-no?”

“Then I will decline. I have a question. Are you aware of the current locations of Hilde, Seelah, and Arueshalae?”

Sosiel let out a soft, exasperated chuckle. “I’m not sure. I think Hilde and Arueshalae were going to stay in New Sarkoris. Daeran and Woljif are closer, they might know.”

“That would be… Aasimar boy and tiefling boy. Of course. Thank you, cleric boy!” Nenio grinned and started to walk off.

Sosiel cast a knowing smile at her. “Nenio. You remember Hilde, Arueshalae, and Seelah’s names, but not mine, Daeran, or Woljif? Are you just messing with us?”

“Dear cleric boy!” Nenio whirled around and smirked at Sosiel. “I have a reputation to uphold, is all! Goodbye!” She grinned and ran off towards the north.

Sosiel smiled and rolled his eyes. She hadn’t changed at all.

About a month later, Daeran rolled out of bed with a yawn, gently patting Woljif on the rear as the tiefling slept in next to him. He slipped his robe on and stumbled towards the door to address the manic knocking. He opened it a crack, then all the way as he spotted a familiar face. “Nenio, what a surprise. What are you doing here at this ungodsly hour?”

“Hello, aasimar boy!” Nenio looked Daeran up and down. He didn’t seem bothered by the fact he was wearing nothing but a robe. “I have a question. Do you know where Hilde, Arueshalae, or Seelah are?”

Daeran sighed and nodded. “Yeah, more or less. I was there when Hilde finished her house, not sure if she still lives there. It’s… You remember Pulura’s Fall, right? There’s a new lake there, and a ridge just north of that, they live around there, south of the forest.”

Nenio nodded, jotting down the instructions in case she forgot. “Alright, thank you! I am unsure if you were engaging in intercourse or if erections are a normal aspect of your mornings, but either way enjoy yourself aasimar boy!” 

Daeran was left stunned as she skipped off. He shrugged and glanced down. He needed a new robe, one that properly covered him. With that, he sighed and slunk back to bed to do as Nenio instructed.

Daeran’s advice wasn’t unhelpful, and it only took Nenio about a week of traveling to Drezen and wandering the newly healed Sarkoris Scar before she spotted a cabin in the distance. It seemed newly built, and had a large garden out in front. She took a deep breath and knocked on the door. Nenio kicked her feet idly as she waited for the door to open, and was soon met with a smiling Arueshalae. The former succubus was wearing lovely sundress that showed off her form, and she had let her hair grow down past her shoulders. “Nenio!” She grinned and pulled Nenio into a tight hug. “Oh, I’ve missed you! It’s been so long! Too long!”

“Succubus-girl-who-isn’t-a-succubus-anymore! Arueshalae!” Nenio grinned in the hug. “Your hair is longer!”

Arueshalae chuckled and led Nenio inside. “Hmm? Oh, um, yes, I think I like it longer. Now that I don’t have to try to avoid being attractive, I can make myself feel beautiful! Ah, come on in, please!”

It was still morning, and both Hilde and Seelah were sitting around a table enjoying some pastries. Both perked up and grinned as Nenio approached, and soon she was smothered between the three in a hug.

Seelah spoke up first, clapping Nenio on the back. “Ha, there you are! So good to see you again, sister!” She went in for a little kiss on the cheek that left Nenio blushing.

Hilde chuckled softly as they pulled away, pulling out a chair for Nenio. “What brings you to our neck of the woods? Researching New Sarkoris for your encyclopedia?”

“Actually, I… Am taking a break from the Encyclopedia Golarionnica. I am lonely, and missed you all. So I decided to come visit!”

Hilde grinned and flashed Arueshalae a look. “Well, we’re glad you came when you did because… We have something to ask you.”

Arueshalae grinned and leaned forward, unable to contain her excitement. “Will you be our maid of honor?!”

Nenio tilted her head quizzically.

Hilde chuckled and leaned against Arueshalae. “We, um… We’re getting married! With a proper ceremony and all that. And… No one’s been as important to us or as helpful in freeing ourselves of the Abyss as you and Seelah. So… We haven’t quite picked who’s whose maid of honor, but we’d like you two.”

Seelah grinned. “I haven’t accepted yet. Been holding off ‘till they could also ask you.”

Nenio quickly started flipping through one of her notebooks on relevant social constructs to check what this ‘maid of honor’ was. At last, she closed the book, grinned widely at the two, and nodded. “I would be honored to! Incidentally, how long has it been since I last saw you all?”

Hilde chuckled. “About two years. Thank you, Nenio. Thank you so much. Do you want to stay with us for a while?”

“I think I would like that.” Nenio smiled as Arueshalae got up to pour her some tea and fetch her a pastry. The three caught her up on old stories, she shared the progress her encyclopedia had made since she had left, and Nenio didn’t feel quite so alone anymore. For the first time in her life, she had friends and felt a calling to something other than her work.

[rollofleaf]

WIP Wednesday!

Preparing for Owlcatober, I'm excited. I need the push to write more.

Queen Galfrey chose to stay behind while the rest went to the festival. Hilde had to order Anevia and Irabeth along; the two tried to refuse the respite they desperately needed. The trip to Kenabres took two uneventful days, and two nights that Arueshalae spent curled up tight in the arms of her Hilde. The camp was too intimate for them to be comfortable with sex, especially when Arueshalae knew she wouldn’t be able to keep quiet. She didn’t mind, cuddling inside a warm sleeping bag pressed against Hilde’s flushed skin brought her all the bliss she could ever want. Aivu joined them, sleeping with her head on their bag like an enormous puppy and very happy to be traveling outside of Drezen.

Arueshalae awoke on the third morning to find herself alone. A brief pang of loneliness hit her, swiftly dimmed by the sound of Hilde’s voice outside. Nenio’s followed, a collected, “How about that? Do you approve?”

“It’s perfect. Thank you, Nenio!” Hilde’s voice rang out again, just outside the tent. Arueshalae slipped on a vest and some pants and poked her head out. Nenio was sitting next to a woman who was looking at herself in the mirror. The woman’s form shimmered for a brief instant as she looked at Arueshalae and grinned. “Good morning, beautiful!” She had Hilde’s voice, but her skin was lighter, her eyes were a deep brown, and her hair was a vibrant platinum blonde. The illusion wrapped around Hilde didn’t hide her freckles or the scar over her nose, though.

Arueshalae looked at her with some confusion. “O-oh! Good morning. Um, why do you look like a human? A very lovely human,” she couldn’t help but add.

Hilde shrugged and looked back. “I think I’m going to go to the festival like this. If it’s really in my honor, then showing up as myself will just be… I won’t get a moment alone. I won’t get to enjoy it as myself, I’ll just be a symbol swarmed by people. I miss being a normal person, not the Knight Commander.”

Arueshalae squatted down next to Hilde and Nenio, a pensive look coming over her face. “Maybe I should do that too…” She looked down at her own tail as it twitched and curled gently around Hilde’s wrist. “I’ve changed, but… Most people probably won’t see that. They’ll still just see the monster. Oh, but disguising myself feels too much like deception!”

Nenio briefly glanced up, then went back to studying the ring she was imbuing with the illusion. “I’m not implying you haven’t redeemed yourself, but I might caution against a disguise. Statistically, you are far more likely to suffer violence if someone sees through your illusion than Hilde is. Far, far more likely.”

“That’s… True. M-maybe I just shouldn’t go. I wouldn’t want to cause a scene or scare people or-“ Arueshalae paused as Hilde tapped her tail twice. Their little code that Arueshalae was getting in her head and starting to spiral. Hilde’s signal for her to stop, breathe, and clear her head.

[rollofleaf]

Hilde & Arue, kiss on the forehead?

Arueshalae had worked up the nerve to approach Hilde on her usual sitting place in the Nexus. She tensed up as she gathered the courage to speak. “Hilde,” she murmured, praying her suggestion wouldn’t be taken the wrong way. “You, ahm, you’re aware of the profane gift we succubi can give, right?”

Hilde raised a curious eyebrow and glanced over. “Yeah, of course. A succubus can give patronage to one mortal, enhancing their abilities but allowing the succubus to speak to them telepathically and control them more easily." She rattled it off like just another interesting fact she had read in a book somewhere. "What about it?"

Arueshalae wrung her hands and avoided answering until a searching gaze from Hilde brought the words out. “Well, um… I can still give a gift like that. But… It’s a little better. As far as I can tell, it’s not inherently evil. And it won’t let me control you. And if I take it back, it won’t hurt…” She smiled to herself at the comforting thought. “I… I’m worried about you. I know how this must sound, but…” Her voice lowered to a nervous whisper. “I’d like to give you my protection…”

Hilde raised an eyebrow in surprise, but she didn’t exactly object. She trusted Arueshalae wholeheartedly, and there was an unmistakable truth in her words. She was growing less stable, every rage was harder to pull herself out of. If the gift would help… “Alright. It’s a good idea. I mean, if you’re really fine giving me your profane… Well, not profane coming from you. Anarchic gift?”

“Anarchic gift… I like that!” Arueshalae smiled. “Um, it does require an… An intimate gesture. But it means nothing. It’s just to give my gift. It doesn’t mean anything affectionate,” she lied, to Hilde and to herself.

“It’s purely utilitarian, it means nothing,” Hilde lied, to Arueshalae and to herself. She readied herself and braced for that familiar draining sensation.

A kiss on the lips was far too intimate, so after a moment of gathering her composure Arueshalae leaned forward and tugged Hilde’s head just a bit down. Her lips pressed softly to the aasimar’s forehead in a careful, delicate kiss. Slowly, celestial runes spelling Hilde’s name started to knit themselves into her wing membrane.

Hilde took in a sharp breath at the feeling. She had expected a quick peck on the lips or cheek, not this. Somehow this was more intimate. The heat of Arueshalae’s body so close to her head, the soft lips brushing so gently against her forehead. Despite herself, Hilde let her eyes flutter shut. She wanted to lean into the succubus, into a warm hug enveloped by her. She couldn’t help but imagine Arueshalae pulling back from the kiss, gazing longingly into her eyes, and going in for a more proper kiss. She was being so gentle, so tender, so her.

Arueshalae was terrified that this sustained touch would hurt Hilde, and even more frightened by how her mind raced. At Hilde’s sharp breath she almost pulled back, but she felt compelled to hold still while the bond was forming. Still, this felt wonderful. The quiet intimacy, and the incredible sensation of kissing to give a gift rather than steal life. Her hand fluttered up to Hilde’s shoulders and the poor succubus barely restrained herself from pulling Hilde into a hug. At last, her lips parted from soft skin with a faint gasp, and the two gazed into each other’s eyes for a long while, flushed and nervous.

At last, Hilde broke the silence with a joke, and Arueshalae laughed and waved off the intimacy of the moment. But the memory would linger in her mind as such a wonderful moment.

[rollofleaf]

Last Six Lines

Last six lines of a WIP! The girlies getting ready to go to the Dance of Masks festival!

Nenio briefly glanced up, then went back to studying the ring she was imbuing with the illusion. “I’m not implying you haven’t redeemed yourself, but I might caution against a disguise. Statistically, you are far more likely to suffer violence if someone sees through your illusion than my assistant is. Far, far more likely.”

“That’s… True. M-maybe I just shouldn’t go. I wouldn’t want to cause a scene or scare people or-“ Arueshalae paused as Hilde tapped her tail twice. Their little code that Arueshalae was getting in her head and starting to spiral. Hilde’s signal for her to stop, breathe, and clear her head.

Tagging whoever sees this!

[rollofleaf]

WIP Wednesday

I didn't end up finishing the AU stuff, but here's what I did write.

Arueshalae pulled her jacket tight over her frame, politely waving away the man that tried to buy her a drink. She was at this club to disappear into the background and enjoy being around mortals, not to be reminded of how most of them saw her. She briefly considered disappearing more properly, but the man took ‘no’ for an answer and no one else seemed to notice her, so there was little need. Alcohol was never a good idea for someone like her that already struggled to control herself, but thankfully the small club had lemonade for her to sip. She came here often to simply be, to observe mortals and get used to being around them without hurting them. And the music was usually nice, too.

It was a band she hadn’t heard today, and both Arueshalae and the rest of the club’s eyes were immediately drawn to the woman that stepped on-stage. She was a brown-skinned aasimar, with peach-colored hair and a wild look to her. She was fit and athletic, and Arueshalae had an excellent view of her muscled form since her only clothes were ripped jeans and pasties over her nipples. Accompanying her was a scrawny tiefling in similarly ripped jeans and a leather jacket that left most of his chest bare. He carried an electric guitar and had his hair messy and disheveled. Next was a dark-skinned human man on drums, who had a more put-together look. He was in shorts and a simple polo, and though he had clearly mussed up his hair it was naturally straight and well-kempt. Finally was the bassist, a dark-skinned human woman in a rather dapper blazer.

They took a short while to test their instruments and the microphone while the buzz of conversation continued. Arueshalae busied herself with just watching them. She tried not to stare at the aasimar woman’s lack of an outfit, instead taking in how she and the tiefling traded jokes and laughs. They all seemed like such good friends… Arueshalae wondered what that was like.

At last, the aasimar cleared her throat into the microphone. “Good evening, we are Hilde and the Butterflies. I’m Hilde, these are the Butterflies.” She had a soft, subdued voice, not what Arueshalae expected of a singer. “Ah-one, two, three, four-“ What followed was a single note from each instrument and a heavy metal growl so loud, primal, and boneshaking it nearly knocked Arueshalae and the rest of the club off their feet. How such a soft voice was even capable of making such a sound was a mystery, but after that they had everyone’s attention. “Thank you, that was ‘Awake at 5 a.m.’ This next song is called ‘Another Road’.”

Arueshalae braced herself for another roar, but what came instead was an upbeat, relaxed melody, accompanied by that gentle voice. The music quickly faded into the background of conversation and food for most, but Arueshalae found herself unable to tear her gaze away. There was such joy in the singer and her words, every break in the lyrics was punctuated with a giggle from Hilde.

“I looked in myself,

And staring back was someone else”

Occasionally one of the other bandmates would chime in to help with vocals, and they seemed to be enjoying themselves as much as Hilde. What was it about the music that made her heart soar?

“But now my heart feels so brand new,

I found a friend for life in you…”

Arueshalae had a soft smile on her thin lips throughout the performance. She took in the beauty, the love these people shared for their music and each other. Love she’d never experience… But the music made her forget that bit for a while. Alas, far too soon it was over. How long had she been staring? A quick glance at the clock and she flushed in embarrassment at spending a full hour like that.

As their final song came to a close, the tiefling leaned into the mic. “Thank you, thank you. Check us out on Spotify, we have merch online…” With that, they started to pack up their instruments and slip out. Arueshalae tensed up. How badly she wanted to talk to them, but what if she messed up? Finally, she could take it no longer. She sprinted outside just as the band was leaving.