#hi let me show you why i love calna so much

[miengsol]

beach ( drabble one. )

aka that one time calum and his wife ( then-friend-maybe-girlfriend ) played hooky and went to the beach.

word count: 1566 words *** “I’ve never been to the beach before.”

He looks up from his dinner, across from her and the plate of home-cooked olive oil drenched spaghetti between them. Wait, what?

Mana fidgets, fork still in mid-air, strands of spaghetti wrapped around it. Once upon a time, she wasn’t able to eat it without vomiting it and the rest of her meal in the following hours. The technical explanation is that spaghetti and therefore all other carbs are acidic and a weak stomach needs anything but more acidity. She shoves the pasta into her mouth before swallowing. “What?”

Her voice has taken on an edge. A soft one, the kind found on a ruler- definite but sanded edge. She doesn’t put on that voice unless she’s uncomfortable. It’s probably being he’s staring at her, dumbfounded. Hurriedly, he looks away. “Sorry, I just-“ He looks up again. “But aren’t there beaches around here?”

She huffs. “That doesn’t count.”

Calum frowns, poking his fork at a cherry tomato. Juice spills out of its flesh onto the surrounding pasta. “Didn’t we go to Straten Island-“

Mana silences him with a look. Or maybe it’s more like he falls silent when she looks at him disbelievingly. “Have you ever heard anyone going New York City for its beaches?”

So maybe he does. They went there once, a few months back just as the summer heat started to seep into the city. Just as the cicadas started to wake up. But maybe he only remembers the beach because this is only the first summer he’s lived through in the city. “…Right.”

And then she softens. She knows, doesn’t she? The way voices can make him flinch. A lot of things make him flinch though, the way his roommate will bring up his family, never picking up he wants to stay as far away from them as possible, the way a taxi honks on a busy street, the way his boss will unintentionally raise her voice when the stress piles on high.

Mana never raises her voice. Well hardly ever does. It doesn’t mean what she says is any less sharper. She’s always been that way, her and her steel-tipped thoughts loose on her tongue, and she’s never once apologized for that. Maybe that’s why he doesn’t think too much on it when she sets her fork down.

“I just…I’ve never swam in the ocean before. Gone to a boardwalk.” In her own way, she makes it up to him. Understands he’s just naturally shaky and if she’s anything less than herself, that would be a disservice to him. He can take it, absorb it like a sponge just fine.

“Didn’t you say your grandma used to live by a beach back in Vietnam?”

She raises a brow. “She did. When did I tell you that?”

“A few weeks ago. You needed to drop her letter off at the post office. She almost drowned  once, but she kept on coming back anyways.”

Mana nods in acknowledgement, impressed even. Pride swells in his chest, but only for a moment. “We never had time to go there.” She picks up her fork again. “Or anywhere, really. Guess that’ll be a problem if the sea levels keep rising.”

***

A few weeks later, he pulls it off. Him, Mana, at a beach with a boardwalk.

It’s his mom’s fault really, ordering him to come back home for the yearly family reunion, an event he’s always hated. So maybe they should’ve been at the house, listening his mother complain about this and that, extended relatives asking unwanted nosy questions about his ( and Mana’s ) personal lives, keeping his head down as they tell him what he ought to be, what he should be doing, all while poking at his weaknesses. He doesn’t have to say yes, he realizes. He’s a full grown adult with a job and financial independence, after all. But the thought of disobeying his mother paralyzes him.

And maybe he is ashamed at the fact. But that doesn’t mean he can’t still rebel.

( If it’s for Mana, he’d defy anything for her. Maybe one day he’ll be strong enough to do it for himself too. )

At the shore, Mana bends down for a closer look at the water. Her hair falls over her shoulders, glistening in the morning sunlight. The water rushes in, bits of sand and seaweed tickling the skin between his toes.

“You remembered,” she states. It’s said more as a fact than a question.

He bends down next to her. The water isn’t clear, but that’s just the way the beaches in New Jersey have always been. Murky sea-green waters with seaweed and rocks, and seashells scattered throughout. “You…said you’ve never been to the ocean before so I just, figured-”

“Mrs. Reynolds is not going to happy. Us playing hooky.”

He cringes. That’s one thing he’s not looking forward to thinking about. “I’ll… worry about that later.” And then he steals a glance at her. “Do you like it? I mean, I know the water isn’t exactly the prettiest and like it can get crowded, but Daniel and I and our friends would go here a lot during the summer and-

She takes his hand and squeezes gently. “Calum, it’s perfect. Thank you.”

Looking back, he realizes he wasn’t breathing there. Heartbeat slows down. Her hand is warm in his own. They’ve been doing that a lot recently, haven’t they? Holding hands. Most of the time it happens when they’re getting on a subway together, a means of make sure they don’t get lost in the crowd. Sometimes she doesn’t let go even after they’ve climbed the stairs up the subway station. And then she lets go.

“C’mon, let’s go in the water.”

“Huh?” The water splashes onto his knees as she stands up, walking further in. The waves rise from her ankles up to her calves. “Wait, but you didn’t bring a bathing suit.”

She turns towards him, raises a brow. “Do I need that to go in?”

“You said you don’t know how to swim!”

 A smile tugs at her lips. Laughter. He thinks he should bottle it up so he can remember it later for a bad day down the road. “Well then, you’ll teach me, won’t you?”

( So he does. He came prepared, wearing swim shorts for the occasion. They don’t get too far in. She gets nervous when she can’t feel solid ground beneath her feet, but she does learn how to hold her breath underwater. He holds her hands all the way through and doesn’t let go. He doesn’t let go either when they move from the beach to the boardwalk, only letting go when a. she buys the cheapest dress she can find because her clothes are drenched in sea water and b. he sees the crane game machine in the arcade and feels a compulsive need to win that Gudetama plushie in the corner. He uses up all his quarters and doesn’t win it, much to his dismay. Mana snorts but clasps a hand around his fingers. A consolation prize, he thinks.

“I’ll get you that one for your birthday.” She promises him. )

***

At the end of the night, after the boardwalk has cleared up, after they’ve walked on the beach in pitch black, Mana turns towards him. Calum looks up from his phone- he has ten missed phone calls from his mother, five from his father, and another three from his sister. And that’s only counting the missed calls notifications on his phone’s screen. Mana tugs on his hand for his attention. The boardwalk is empty and the dim lights of the street lamps light the way. A sea breeze blows through between them.

 “Thank you.” She tells him. “I had a wonderful day, Calum.”

And then she leans in closer. His heart speeds up as he realizes she’s just kissed him on the cheek. Oh. He nearly drops the phone in his hand. That’s new too, isn’t it? They’ve never had that conversation, have they- about what they’re supposed to be. For a moment, Calum considers asking her right there and then. He also considers cups her face and kissing her right there and then.

But then she steps back, flustered. They’re still holding hands. “…Right,” she then says, with the usual soft edge on her voice. “We should- we should probably head back now.”

He blinks but then squeezes her hand. It’s okay, he realizes. They can take it one day at a time. Just being with her is more than enough right now. “Okay. Let’s go home now.”

( And at the car, as she climbs into the passenger seat, his phone vibrates. It’s another call from his mom. His high from the boardwalk drops. He stares at it for a long moment, thumb hovering over the call button before Mana plucks the phone out of his hand and hangs up, much to both his horror and relief.

“Don’t worry about her,” she reassures him, eyes glistening in the dark. “I’ll tell her I kept on bugging you to take me to the beach and you couldn’t say no.” And Mana laughs. “She can’t yell at you for playing hooky then, can she?”

His heart swells. Yeah, Calum says.

For Mana, he can do anything. He’ll do anything if it’s for her. )