#hhhhhhhhhhhh still i’m so!!! SO!!

[starbuck]

guys… i got an interview!! 🎉🎉🎉🎉

[luminousjellyfishy]

Lol I have tickets for this year

ARE YOU FOR REAL

I MISSED THE ONE EVENT IN CANADA (THAT I HAVE KNOWN ABOUT) RELATED BACK TO UNDERTALE????

IT HAD BETTER BE THERE NEXT YEAR

I MISSED IT BY ALMOST 3 MONTHS NOOOOOOO

[berrypass-de-murdler]

2 - 46 The Clocktower Killing

Send this to your pookie now

That's it that's the whole intro

DON'T READ THE EPISODES WITHOUT READING THE BOOKS!!

Irratino is thoroughly kneading Logico like a dough as he’s flopped over on the bed.

LOGICO: I don’t know, Irratino, I don’t know… IRRATINO: Gico, you worry far too much. The worst of the worst has passed already.  LOGICO: But what if you’re completely wrong… IRRATINO: Look at me.

Logico sits up and rolls.

IRRATINO: I’m not gonna let anything happen to you, okay? I promise.  LOGICO: Okay…

Irratino turns off the light and flops back. 

IRRATINO: Don’t forget to trust your gut. LOGICO: Right…

The next day, Marble’s map leads the two to an abandoned city. A very carefully placed murder is prominent in front of the impressive clocktower, and the Duchess, Baron Maroon, and Tangerine stand idle. It all looks very set up.

Inside the clock is pure, choking rust. Irratino can’t even come inside for fear of asbestos and who knows what else. There’s a rickety crumbling staircase in which every third, fifth, and seventh step is missing. Very specifically.

LOGICO: I MUST BE DREAMING!

He runs out and crashes into the Baron, who is less than pleased.

MAROON: Watch where you’re fucking going.

Irratino runs up to Logico and grabs his hand. 

IRRATINO: Shh. Logico. You’re not dreaming, but you’re still okay. Okay?

Logico takes a deep breath. The suspects then simultaneously show their weapons. The Duchess is holding a perfect goose, Tange has a metal 0 they tore off the clock face somehow, and Maroon is holding one of its rusted hands like a sword.

LOGICO: Then why is everything so… so…  TANGERINE: Automatic, specifically set up and planned? LOGICO: YES. TANGERINE: We were paid for this. LOGICO: By who?? TANGERINE: [shrug] Can’t say.  IRRATINO: Logico, watch this. This concoction will allow me to see the past in clear detail. LOGICO: I thought you could do that anyway. IRRATINO: Not without a partner. But now, I’m invincible!

He chugs it down. Immediately, he goes cross-eyed and has to sit down. 

LOGICO: Irratino…

So that turns out to be no clue whatsoever. Logico has to figure out who’s lying from the suspects’ blank, empty statements. At this point, a character-relevant dialogue quip would make things less creepy. But that’d be completely out of character for Logico to say.

(It was Tangerine btw)

TANGERINE: Oh! [brings out a piece of paper] ‘You think I did this because I wanted to? I had to do it to save the world!’ LOGICO: [grabs it] Who wrote this?? TANGERINE: I said, I can’t say. 

They run away inhumanly fast for their height. Logico has to search the body (disgusting!) to find another map. This smells like a wild goose chase, one of Logico’s least favorite smells. Or perhaps that’s because Duchess’ goose is right behind him!

GOOSE: WAH LOGICO: Ew!! Get away get away get away-

He trips over Irratino, who is lying on the ground. He gurgles audibly and his face is turning green.

IRRATINO: logico… LOGICO: WHAT DID YOU DRINK?? IRRATINO: [belch] hhhhhhhhhhhh

The end! 

The umpteenth volume of Irratino Essentially Killing Himself

Anyway, the gays are off on another adventure that CERTAINLY won't result in something awful.

What could possibly go wrong?

The power of Goat Lord compels you!

See you next time murdlers!

[roseytoesy]

Ask Prompt:

-{ “Did you really think you could evade becoming my meal, now?”

Have fun~

Hecking… hhhhhhhhhhhh. This is going to be good. Thank you tero.

A Hunting Game

Rosey panted as she nearly tripped over the twigs on the forest floor. The rustling of something large moving arose the floor keeping her running. She couldn’t risk flying, he would see and hear her. And he was already close on her tail!

She continued her mad sprint into a thick area where the trees were a bit dense hoping that the smaller area would give her a small moment to breathe. She curled up one of the roots over a small drop, perfectly hiding behind a small bunch of ivy leaves, catching her breath.

Her heart was pounding as she listened to the shifting of the foilage around his form come closer and closer. She even slightly held her breath as she could sense that he was in front of her hiding spot in the trees. time ticked on for a big and she heard him shift again a bit back.

"Ssssssunshine~" he cooed out into the small area, Rosey felt her cheeks warm and the hairs on her neck stand up at the deeper voice he was using. “Come out. Come out~ your sweet scent and rapid little heart can’t hide forever~”

Rosey lightly bit down on her tongue and put a hand over her mouth to muffle the small flustered sound that wanted to escape at his words.

“You know you want thissss” he hissed out slithering closer. His voice dripped with an overly sweet tone, and like a siren's call, a part of Rosey knew he was right. She did want this but another part was too hyped on adrenaline and playful pride just give up yet. She could hear him lean against the thicket of trees that was her hiding spot, chuckling deeply.

It was silent for a few seconds before he hummed. “Mmmmm~ I can taste your sweetness already.” He cooed. She could very vividly imagine him licking his lips after that. “So very sweet and small, ssssooon to be all mine.” He growled that last part.

Rosey couldn’t help the squeak that came out of her mouth. She heard him chuckle at that and she bolted as his hand crashed down right behind her, making her let out another squeak in her adrenaline-fueled rush.

“So now it’s a game of tag? Alright then. I’m it.” He growled now lunging over the tree cluster and slithering quickly after the fleeing fairy. She let out a childish scream as she saw him chasing after her. Her wings fluttered in a weak attempt to push her forward faster than her pursuer. She stumbled into a clearing and knew that it was done. There weren’t any good hiding spots out here and he was hot on her tail. She scrambled slightly under a rock in a half burrow and tried her best to catch her breath again. She could hear him slithering through the tall grass.

“As fun as this has been my sweet, I have to say I’m ravenous after a good chase. You can come out and do this the easy way. Or…we could do this the fun way. For me at least~.” He said slithering in front of her hiding spot and past. His long tail slowly passed by behind him. A few seconds passed again before he tapped a few times on the rock just above her head. His face now just in front of the opening.

“Hello sssssunshine~” he hissed smirking at how Rosey shriked at his sudden appearance and looked around helplessly. She was cornered. A perfect little spot he could grab her out of. He pretended to think for a moment watching her every move.

“Well, Rosey? my offer still stands~” he smirks as she watches him with wide eyes, not full of fear but with flustered giddiness. “You can make this nice and easy, crawl into my mouth and surrender to me~.” He said licking his lips at the thought. “Or you can stay in there and I’ll get you out myself. Make you squirm in my coils and squeeze some of the energy out of you.” He smirked again before laying on his front his face the only thing she could see at this point.

“Tick tock sunshine~ Arlo is missing you oh so dearly.” He said as a small growl emitted from his middle in a way that sounded like it was agreeing with his words. Roseys face was aflame as her mind scrambled for any way to get out of this not in the nagas gut. But just as he said before, she did want this… she sighed before moving forward a bit Tero’s smirk softened as she moved toward him. “Mmmmm that’s it~ come closer~.” Just as he started to open his mouth she hit the tip of his nose causing him to jerk back at the small shock of pain from the surprisingly strong. She ran past him but the strong tail was fast to entrap and halt her little escape attempt.

“Did you really think you could evade becoming my meal, now?” Tero hissed behind her she didn’t even get time to turn to look at him before her head was engulfed. His tongue slicked up her face and her hair his coils easily supporting and pushing her deeper as he moaned around her. Her sweet taste ignited a part of his brain to hold her close, hold her deep, and have her all to himself. Away from anything that could possibly hurt her. So with some greedy swallows and groans she disappeared into his mouth nothing more than a wiggling bulge traveling down his throat and into his murmuring belly.

“Mmmmph. Delicious as always my sweet~” he murmured as she started to shift around. The small bulge on his middle wasn't even noticeable unless you were looking for it. Small little divots showing up at Rosey pressed out at him and got comfortable. Sinking into the folds around herself.

Roseys face was very warm at the situation and her exhaustion and Tero's sweet words and the way Arlo was gurgling happily around her. “Hhhhhhh yea. G-good game Tero. That was fun.” She said a bit breathlessly. “Hope I tasted even better than usual since you had to earn your little snack.”

Tero happily licked his lips at her overwhelmingly sweet yet refreshing flavor. Something he could never get tired of and would happily enjoy time and time again as they share this wonderful experience. He felt another small shift in his core. Pressing into one of his hands that was currently resting over where she was hidden away. He started to rub at her and hummed happily as she fully relaxed into the cradling hold of his stomach. “It was a fun little game I will admit sunshine. Though that little trick you did at the end was a bit rude.” She giggled at his feigned hurt. “How could you treat your own boyfriend like this?” He bemoaned dramatically even putting a hand to his forehead before they both erupted into a large fit of laughter.

Eventually, they calmed down and he could feel Rosey still, and her conversations grew quiet. “Getting sleepy?” Tero asked struggling to keep his eyes open.

“Mhm,” she hummed out snuggling into the front wall a bit as his hands came to rest on his belly, to cup and hold the small bulge she made in his middle a little closer still.

“Mmmm. Me too. How about we both get some well earned rest, Rosey. You know I’ll keep you safe.” Tero murmured adjusting himself to be lying on one of his coils like a comfortable pillow. Rosey didn’t respond. Already fast asleep from her exciting little chase. Tero smiled fondly before relaxing to drift off. Happy and full of love. Holding one he loved so close and so safely.

[you-cant-fuck-megaman]

megaman AI box art

there’s a pretty big discussion around AI art, it seems i’m not super-familiar with The Discourse but if my programming experience has taught me anything it’s that random generation has to springboard off of something (usually called a seed), and you have to feed stuff in to an AI to get material to build off of that springboard so i’ve got several big goddamn questions as to where t f these guys would get their seeds and material from

but me being me, the first thing on my mind is “can you draw megaman with it?” so i decided to insert in "megaman box art" to a handful of different ones, see what happens

first off is a place called Nightcafe Studio, which allows you to pick one of three styles to make art in: cosmic, matte, and cyberpunk. nacho cheese and cool ranch were out, sorry.

this is "megaman box art" as done in its cosmic style and it certainly looks cosmic megaman got a nose guard to defend against space pollen, i guess and either his arm got detached and is floating down there or he's got a vacuum cleaner attached to his shins but it sure is cosmic

6/10, pretty colors but not very megaman

next style was matte, and

this actually looks pretty fucking cool! you've got a rad cityscape in the background, lighting’s really neat, and background to the MGA AIN MGATAN logo as sponsored by pepsi is cool

i guess that's kind of sort of Model ZX aile if you squint and tilt your head, but she’s the main part that turns the entire thing sinister. did you know that when you’re dealing with the fae shapeshifted as a human, you should count the features to make sure everything’s accurate? count the knuckles, count the fingers, count the shadows... oops, six fingers hah hah hah hah hhhhhhhhhhhh this is not Model ZX aile, this is not your friend.

7/10 you’re not stealing my goddamn teeth today, oberon

last to go is cyberpunk style and

holy shit this is a fucking WWE poster roman reigns dressed in pink and got a fucking beam tonfa??? or something a very distorted vince mcmahon puts on a power glove while brock lesnar looks disappointed to the side, and fiery font tells us that the meemen meeaiiaininaihiniahin is gonna happen at 2 / F' / 20 i could imagine you could probably print this out, put it through photoshop for edits, and then try to pass it off as an official poster for a synthwave megaman reboot. if you were a moron who wanted to get fired, i mean. fantastic way to commit career suicide.

1/10 coolest shit i've ever seen but very bad megaman art tbh

still, i'll give cyberpunk another shot. maybe it was confused, thinking it was going to have men that were mega, rather than megaman

HOLY SHIT

fuckin AXE DADY megaman over here this has it all it's got the dictator cam, looking up like it's hitler it's got the stance, holding a black vylon slinky to the side while he contemplates shooting above it it's got the logo sleekness, i've never seen MEEMN AXE DADY rendered so well it's got the color contrast, bright blue city in the left while a goddamn laser rips through time and space on the right and it's got a cool robot that actually kind of has a buster arm, though the computer is clearly confused as to what megaman’s buster actually looks like maybe should’ve let an artist handle that?

10/10, great megaman art, fucking amazing, would play, would watch, would let axe dady shoot things

next up is deepai's Machine Learning Model doesn’t seem to have any parameters, just put in a text box and go, so i did

thanks i've been wondering how it would be possible to turn megaman into a horror icon i didn't think hollowing his face out and replacing it with a fucking skull would be the answer but this is a pretty handy way to ensure my insomnia persists through the night

0/10 i

fucking

hate it

hastily getting the fuck away from that abomination unto both god and man, next up is dream.ai it seems to be a service mostly for developing and providing NFTs, but it's actually completely free with a little finagling so i don’t get where the value is supposed to come from

anyway, there's a lot of different options to provide a customized art style for the prompt, and you can even see it with different things it's got a lot of options too many to safely delve into, in fact, so i'm going to do the game journalist thing and generate maybe a handful of things and judge it entirely off that

first off is a comic art style generated without a seed

and at first glance this looks partially like the megaman 1 box art characters decided to pvp with each other at second glance as you look closer, though, you can clearly tell it's an i don't know what the fuck

4/10 colors look cool at least

maybe weird shit is the best part of it, though maybe weird shit is what it specializes in so let's try psychadelic

well, that's psychadelic all right i guess the dude in the middle is kind of sort of vaguely megaman but i don't know what the fuck else there is, there's actually less sensible shit going on here

2/10 i like listening to shpongle too, dude

but it's safe to say this system needs a bit of help let's go back to comic style and feed in some nice art from existing megaman

in my opinion, this poster is the peak megaman experience. it’s the quintessential representation. this pretty clearly dictates what megaman's about guy in blue shooting things robots getting shot at ominous shitbag in the background castlevania for some reason

favorite promo art, hands down. so let’s see how the AI works with this.

all right, finally, we're getting somewhere. guess this AI just needed to copy from someone else’s homework first. wow, that brings up a lot of questions about the nature of the materials AI art generators use to build their random images. well, that’s goddamn horrifying to contemplate. am i a monster unwittingly contributing to a system of artistic exploitation for the sake of making a shitpost on a megaman shitpost blog? fucked up.

anyway, we got a robot dude, he's got a gun, he's even got a little strut i like this guy a lot, he's got moxie and a rad face-visor thing

all right, i'm feeling generous 6/10 you fucked up but now you're getting better

let's go once more for comic style and

all right, holy shit, you're learning fast yeah this is undeniably megaman he's even got the weird helmet and weird boots and everything

there's a cool cityscape, a sci-fi sky, and he's trying to give the underside of a ship the highest of fives he doesn't look like he's standing very well on his taco bowl of destiny, though but i can't fault him with his dildo leg, must be difficult to stand on and judging by his pants, he's got trouble with testicles the size of texas growing in after kicking wily's ass 69 times understandable problem, really, after you go through 10 games that’s when you turn from a mega boy to a real mega man

9/10, good box art

you know, i'm feeling confident, i think dream's got a good idea as to what's going on with megaman let's take a risk and go for a different art style synthwave looks good, it's all about that retro shit and megaman's a retro series

this doesn't look like a new picture that just looks like you took the original picture and put a shitty smear on it

god fucking damn it

0/10, apply yourself, pick up a goddamn pencil and then see me after class

getting away from that, next up is stable diffusion, apparently a state-of-the-art AI generator hosted by Hugging Face, which i hope is a legitimate company and not a front for xenomorphs

and HOLY SHIT

on the first go we have some actual fucking box art good background, very clear, we've got a skyline with a forcefield pyramid in the background i guess wily's a space egyptian now? rad.

napalm bomb megaman's doing some fucking pelvic thrusts ready to spread war crimes all about bit distressing for our sweet friendly superhero boy but i'll admit i'd react the same way after getting a fucking napalm gun for an arm.

we've even got a rating on the bottom right, indicating that it's suitable for ages Video Game and up got a clearly-defined line for letting the publishers rub their dick all over, filling it with logos or titles or other corporate information

i feel confident about this, i like our MEAAN game, shit's looking pretty good

10/10, good box art. real good box art. little timmy would probably be confused seeing it on the shelf but this strikes me as something Bob Capcom would reasonably okay after five lagers and an existential crisis.

getting a little concerned here, looks like crisis on infinite megamans

i don’t want to imagine how many official variants of rock there are, especially if you count all the fangame/indie game knockoffs, but having them all collide together into a single Enter the Megaverse sounds like it'd be effectively impossible to handle do you want to play megaman, megaman x, megaman volnutt, megaman.exe, star force, zx, x over flavored? dos-flavored? bad box art flavored? captain n flavored? pachinko-flavored?

NGL though if rockman taisen ends up being some sort of dumb megaman battle royale then i would actually punch a cactus out to be able to play as ruby spears megaman frankly, huge missed opportunity that they're not even in X Dive the tagline even writes itself, "I knew you'd pull for Mr. Lincoln!"

oh yeah i was rating the cover uhhhhhhhh i dunno, there's dudes i don't know, they're doing poses, ominous guy in the background i guess it's serviceable? this doesn’t really tell me anything about the game, there’s just guys.

6/10 i'd pass it over and look at something else

holy shit are you okay? either he's (she's? they're?) taking a dump and all their lower intestines got caught in it, or something is burning out in the thinkpan and won’t be coming back

that dead-eyed glare is actually legitimately haunting this is the expression someone makes in anime after they realize you stabbed them and you were never their friend i've only seen that gaze in my life twice before and let me tell you, you remember things

1/10 someone call the police

all right, i’m moving away from that before i bring up more questionable ground our final contestant for the night is hotpot.ai, a website for general purpose game asset AI generation. they’ve got AI-handled copywrite, too, which strikes me as risky ground. if i can’t trust a machine with megaman, can i trust a machine to legally cover my ass? i would never trust a machine with my pants, ass or no. we’ve already firmly established that robot masters are always a pants-on debacle.

anyway, let’s give this a shot

aaaaaand hit “Generate”, and

EXCU

NOPE

FUCK THIS

I’M DONE

[bigsnzstanacct]

“Oh no! Oh NO, not again, you can stop it right there mister…”

His eyes had been closing, one powerful bicep rising towards a much more powerful part of Paul’s body. His slightly upturned nose going pink at the edges, his brows torn between the scrunching of irritation and the smoothening of release, as if at present unsure as to which would be needed when. Oh, but I knew, I knew all too well.

“Not you, not here, and definitely not right now, you know how hard it was for me to get this organized, you get that nose under control right… now!”

He did look up at me then, through bleary eyes. His nostrils were pinker still around the rims, and he scrubbed and fussed at them with his hands, roughing up his nose in lieu of releasing it.

“Ah, cmon bud, it’s just me, I been sneezing hard forever…”

“No, you sneezed hard when we met. You sneezed hard when you were my size. Now you sneeze dangerous.”

It was true, Paul had always been a big sneezer. Hard, howling achoos that rattled the windows and made people jump. But that was before he’d started really working out. Turns out his body responded really well to intense exercise. And as he’d inflated to his current superhero proportions, something else had become similarly supersized…

“C-cmon… they h-haven’t got… haven’t got that… snf! …that much bigger…”

His eyes were starting to lose focus again, his rubbing and scrubbing at his nose slowing as the obvious ineffectiveness of the action became plain. No, there was only one thing that would satisfy his big, itchy nose, his superhuman lungs, his unreal allergies…

Quickly, I did my best to haul him up. It was lucky he came willingly, because I couldn’t manhandle him at this size, not if I put all my strength into it. And also lucky I acted when I did because…

“HhHHHHHHHhhh!”

Already the loose gravel was starting to roll. I knew I shouldn’t have asked for Paul’s help with the finishing touches on the new outdoor oasis I’d been asked to build, not with so much dust around and Paul having always been sensitive. Demolition maybe, but finishing? But there was just so much heavy concrete involved, and he was so damn strong…

“HhHHHHHHuuuUUUUUUUUUUUHHHH!!!”

If only his nose wasn’t just as strong. Fuck. Where the hell could my supersized friend give vent to what was brewing in his nose, his chest, hell his whole body?

“HHHHhhRRRRRRUUUUUUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!”

He stumbled blindly as I shoved him along, past the landscaping, past the new furniture, if he was gonna blow, at least let him just take out a few shrubs, a section of fence… definitely can’t point him towards the house… just because he hadn’t taken out a chunk of wall yet didn’t mean he wasn’t able.

And all at once it was too late.

“HHHHUUUUUUHHH… HUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRSSSSSCCCCCCCCHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!” He bellowed.

Huh. Wonder if any of the neighbors want help with their renos… given the sudden windstorm that just blew through the neighborhood.

And as for Paul…

“Whew! Nothing like a good hard sneeze! I needed that. Anyway, you’re all good right buddy? I’m headed off to the gym. Gotta keep my growth up!” He said with a wink. And what was that I saw pass over his eyes as he gave a little sniff, and headed back into the house to grab his jeans?

[grey-coded]

oh….. my god. those barts you posted??? what the FUCK. my mind is melting. oh GOD. WHAT. HIW. HOW DID YOU. HOW DID YOU MAKE HIM LOOK SO GOOD. i mean he always LOOKS GOOD. but you made him….. HHHHHHHHHHHH WHAT THE HELL. especially the first one…… AHHHHHHHHHHHNFNFFFGGNNNNNGGGGGG

GOOD MORNING TO THIS ASK AND THIS ASK ONLY

but to answer your question,

IDK MAN I JUST PUT A PENCIL TO MY PAPER AND HE FUCKIN APPEARS LIKE IDK HOW HE GETS THERE !! IT HAPPENS EVERY SINGLE TIME!! not that i’m complaining, i’m hyperfixated on him for a goddamn reason BUT STILL.

and yea that first one. i’m very proud of that first one. his hair is so damn fluffy for no fucking reason and i adore him for it.

the scrunkle, the red to my blue, the speedy guy, i want to scramble him up like eggs and then throw him in the microwave and watch him spin.

[miekasa]

ok so it's eren angst like from eren's pov and it's like eren and reader have been friends since they were 7 and they make a promise to stick together forever yk? and it kinda follows them (in intervals of three years bc i am a WHORE for symbolism) and around age 13 reader brings around jean like "here is my new friend" yk in the way that makes u absolutely FUME and eren is jealous but he doesn't know it's that (lmao what a dumbass). skip another 3 years and reader and jean are dating, reader is crying bc of a fight between her and jean and eren's like "u deserve better" but internally he's like "i could treat u so much better" skip another 3 years and eren can't take it anymore and he confesses and it's messy tears are everywhere and reader feels so fucking guilty bc she made him feel that way. she tries to reason w him and say they can still be friends but eren can't do it and they j ... drift apart. fast forward another three years and eren's 22 now. he's grown into himself and he's been around more (if u catch my drift) and he walks out to check his mail and he finds a wedding invitation for ur wedding w jean (how the hell did u get his address??) and he says fuck it why not (this art of him in a suit has me in a chokehold btw), at least for old time's sake. he sees you in your dressing room, in a robe with your curlers still in, but you’ve never looked more beautiful. and reader is like “you made it” and eren is like “i wouldn’t miss it for the world” (as much as it pains him) and just as u and jean r done exchanging vows and go in for the kiss, he leaves, tears pricking at his eyes

anyways yea i'm thinking 1-2k idk

I like it!! Kinda wanna fight you for the image of Eren crying tho smh 🙄🙄 very compromising for me bc I’m happy with either of them but knowing Eren is all :(( makes me :(( but that’s what good angst should do!!

[whimsyprinx]

Do I actually want to be in a relationship or a glamorized version of a relationship?

[pinksuitman]

*pops open a bottle of champagne* Heres to my comp het disappearing!

[davidhowardthornton]

i did not save this photo. this photo saved me.

[starbuck]

I can’t believe I started this rewatch in November. N O V E M B E R.....

And I’m not even done s3...

[inthewild-flowers]

I’ve had my computer open in front of me for the past 2 and a half hours while I’ve been on my phone and I haven’t been able to get anything done and I’m getting increasingly stressed out bc I have things I need to do but I’m just. Not doing them & every time I start to do them I get even more stressed out

[obiwan]

more new obikin recs pleaseeee <3

Okay this has been stewing in my inbox for a while and I think I have enough new ones. I know the last one requested the last three months and I don't want a re-do, so I'm going to do a mixture of old and new faves.

✰ (Explicit, A/B/O, Complete) Molten by @zimriya

“Was Ben my omega father?” Luke asks.

The cavernous void that is Darth Vader’s heart demands that he swallow the boy whole. “Why does it matter?” he says. “Your other father clearly never wanted you. He gave you up the minute you were born.”

One truth; one lie.

This is a continuation to a past rec., Igneous. It's still canon compliant, it's basically the rest of the story. I'd say you should give these a read even if you're not usually into a/b/o, because it doesn't really linger on the whole a/b/o usual squicks people have, and it is so beautifully done. It also has a little epilogue piece which (in my opinion) has the funniest star wars imagery. I truly recommend reading these if you love canon compliant obikin.

✰(Explicit, WIP) stars to fill my dream by hidden_humours

Given a second chance, Anakin Skywalker awakes from death--into a different world than the one that made him.

Obi-Wan Kenobi, a lost young padawan still finding his way, becomes apprenticed to a living legend who doesn't seem all there...

I know reverse!padawan isn't everyone's jam, but it is mine, so you get it recced. I'm really obsessed with this story (and this author, I like the way they write slightly unhinged Anakin, they have a little one shot if you don't want to read wips, I recommend checking it out) Please note that in this story, Anakin is a bit creepy so keep that in mind.

✰ (Explicit, Complete) Sanctifica Mē by @theseptemberist

Father Obi-Wan Kenobi has never desired anything more than to guide and serve his flock. He's content with his simple life—or he would be, if not for one confessor who returns again and again, pouring sickening stories into his ear, sinful and bloody. It's unbearable, but he can't bring himself to turn away. At least, not until he finally understands.

What does Anakin Skywalker truly want from him?

I know people complain about reccing popular authors but! 1)there are always new people in the fandom, and 2)there might be people who have missed it! Hooooly shit so this is *the* yandere!anakin priest fic. It’s *so* good, as always mind the tags, but hhhhhhhhhhhh priest!obi-wan. l always keep coming back to this one, if only for the writing alone (and nothing else *cough*)

✰ (Explicit, Completed) Slow Learner by @binaryeclipse​

Four times Anakin tried to fit Obi-Wan's big dick inside him and one time he managed it. or; the evolution of their sexual relationship.

I mean. Literally what it says on the tin lmaoo - but it’s so well done. It’s literally 12k of Anakin just gagging for it (how relatable,) I don’t know what else to say. As always read the tags, but also go read this fic. 

✰(Explicit, WIP) Obi-Two by Viraha

After Anakin is denied the rank of master, a mysterious phenomenon in the Force creates a baffling situation right in the middle of the same Council session. Anakin is not complaining.

Or, How Two Obi-Wan Kenobi can resolve Pretty Much Everything

I usually refrain from reccing things with only a single chapter or very early in the WIP stages but this one intrigued me so much. Usually time travel fics bring in the pada-wan version, but this one has a twist. I don’t know I’m very intrigued by this one, I’ll be watching this space. 

✰(Explicit, Complete) full throttle by spqr

“If you’re not first, you’re last,” Anakin says wisely. “Qui-Gon told me that once.”

I know it’s a (relatively) well known fic but I just read it again the other day and. HHHHHHHHHH rattling the walls of my enclosure. So it goes in this rec list, read this if you haven’t it’s so good. bark bark bark. 

✰(Teen & Up, Complete) Hands that are earnest, brave, and true by @obi-wkenobi​

On Trevo, after watching his Master be fret and fawned over by the governments elite, Obi-Wan miraculously peeled himself away from wanton eyes and returned to sit by his side, and for the first time ever, Anakin truly noticed the hands that rose to smooth back long copper hair.

Or, five times Anakin was distracted by Obi-Wan's hands, and one time that Obi-Wan noticed.

An *entire* fic about Obi-Wan’s hands y’all. It’s really soft and I’d say a feel-good fic if you’re in the mood for some fluff and love. There’s also a lot of pining (which is the draw!) but it’s all resolved in the end and it’s so beautifully done!

✰(Explicit, Complete) A Study in Tears by shatou

Anakin is used to sinking into the comfort of Obi-Wan’s arms when he is in tears. Obi-Wan is used to offering it. Neither of them realizes the moment when habit tips into heat-haze, but their acceptance for each other is boundless all the same.

(or: five times anakin gets aroused by accident when he’s crying and being comforted by obi-wan… and one time obi-wan does)

BARK HOWL CRY etc. God this fic, it really is one of *the* ones for me. I really enjoy this author’s work, but this particular fic. You know what I love, when a kink that could be considered niche, or could easily be done in a very tacky/porny way is done so intricately and artfully it just. Hhhhhhhhh it’s really good. Really good. 

✰(Explicit, Complete) Beer and Paint by @intermundia​

Artist!AU - it’s a part of a collection (go read all of it if you haven’t already) this is the latest stand alone chapter!

As it’s written, it’s inspired by Hayden in Life as a House, and it’s soooo delicious. Perfect mixture of hot/angsty/sweet. The atmosphere is set *so* well for a relatively shorter fic, as always i’m in awe, this was really good. 

✰(Explicit, WIP) if this isn’t nice, what is? by Anonymous​

"Your form has been improving remarkably quickly, Anakin," Obi-Wan said on the sparring platform one afternoon, as he wiped a bead of sweat from his forehead with his sleeve. "Don't tell me you've actually been listening to the healer for once and doing your physical therapy."

In his adrenaline-addled mind, it took Anakin a moment to sort out what his master was talking about, but eventually his gaze drifted down to his lightsaber, or, more accurately, to the mechno-hand that held it.

"Um," he said. "Something like that."

---

Or, once he could hold a lightsaber again, it took Anakin maybe three days to learn how to jerk off with the new metal hand.

Again, what it says on the tin. It’s really well done though, I can’t wait for it to be completed. Tbh personally I really enjoy stories around Anakin’s mechno arm, and this one...well. I really really like it. 

✰(Explicit, WIP) toss overboard what is too heavy to carry by @tennessoui​​

In the aftermath of the Clone Wars, Palpatine dead and untold tragedy averted, the Republic struggles to heal and rebuild itself.

Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi attempt to do the same with their own relationship, riddled as it has become with betrayal, distrust, and hurt. It's not going too well. Desperate and unwilling to accept that maybe their friendship is ruined, Anakin finds a counselor they can talk to, one that specializes in healing "teams."

Or, as the counselor would probably put it, married couples, which they are decidedly not. Not that she knows that though. And not that they know that she thinks they're in a romantic relationship either. What a silly assumption to make. It's not like they're more intimate than lovers or anything.

YOOOOOOOO God this fic this fic!!!!!! I don’t know if I need to rec Kit’s fics honestly, as with some other authors I can feel people going “yes we are aware of this fic” but as I said, I want to do an honest list lol. Listen this one really has the potential to end me I don’t know. I’m really into the premise, the setting, the dialogue, the everything. 

✰(Explicit, Complete)  sink into the dunes by @starsdies​​​

“How about now, my young Padawan?” Anakin shivers, the title in Obi-wan’s chiding voice taunting him. Like he already knows. “Do you need me now too?”

This has every single trope I can want in a fic - first time, virginity kink, canon-verse!!!!!! I love their dynamic in this, especially love how suave Obi-Wan is. The tone, the setting, the dialogue... chef’s kiss.  

✰(Explicit, Complete)  on high by @treescape​​​​

Anakin breaks once they’re in the turbolift, alone, a dozen stories beneath the Council chamber and climbing steadily downwards.

“Are you even going to look at me?” he blurts out into the heavy silence, his own eyes fixed straight ahead. Obi-Wan stands still as stone beside him, but for the rise and fall of his chest, their shoulders just a breath from touching. His hands are folded into the sleeves of his robes, the very image of the calm Jedi Master.

It’s infuriating. It makes Anakin want to fidget, makes him want to run the edges of his own sleeves between his fingers and twist just for something else to focus on, but he catches himself just in time.

He doesn’t want to give Obi-Wan the satisfaction of sensing him squirm.

Or, Anakin returns from a series of missions and thinks Obi-Wan is angry with him.

Obi-Wan being angry with Anakin because he’s being too reckless is *my jam* I love this trope of one of them being too worried about the other one because they’re too reckless!!! This is beautifully written as always, I genuinely love angry!obi-wan so much, possibly one of my favourite obi-wans. 

✰(Explicit, WIP)  the trouble with wanting by @travellingcircus​​​​

Anakin is an alpha with few hobbies, chief among them watching his favourite omega and amateur videographer Ben showcase his many, many talents. Anakin tells himself he isn't obsessed, but when he finds out Ben is a lot closer to him than he realises, he stops at nothing to get what he wants. That is, Ben's sweet little ass--even if Ben turns out to be Anakin's stuffy, buttoned-up Lit professor.

Ahhhh last but not least! Mind the tags, again with a bit of a darker Anakin in this one, but I am so obsessed with the story telling aspect and I’ll be hones the idea of ~professor kenobi being on cam on the side is just. You know. They also have a couple other stories as a part of the obikin fest s1 which you should check out! 

Oookay, this was it for me this time! I know I’m probably missing some great content out there, but I don’t want to rec anything I haven’t personally read. As always, please mind the tags before you read a story, and don’t read it if you see anything that might potentially trigger you. 

[a-supcrmight-blog]

Sleepy....

[abuzd]

note to self from therapy in case i forget:

tw for sui mentions and pr*gramm*ng

possible hypothesis

maybe it wasn’t aia or helix’s influence over aia to try n kill us. it might be yet another alter completely unlnown to me. possible activation might’ve been because the day of the incident i had therapy where i Talked to an Older Adult with Authority and Knowledge and Influence and believes us about the usual men (but we actually used the name of the cult and talked about it’s connections in our session for her notes). it’s unfortunately very common for self preservation systems/alters to activate when pr*gramm*ed to self destruct as punishment for putting our handlers at risk of being revealed. this is a safety measure trained handlers are able to even hide in systems to protect themselves from their pr*gramm*ed victims. these alters believe the SAFEST thing to do for the system is to die as opposed to reveal their handlers identities. worse would be in store for the system if the rules are not adhered to. and loyalty is built to be unquestioned unconditionally to the handlers and roles. so it.. could’ve been an alter only activated. might only be a fragment, not a whole alter. these are al just theories still. i just hhhhhhhhhhhh i don’t want anymore altersssjsjdhhfgddghd so i hope this isn’t the case but we do need to be open minded and prepared if this is the case. because it’d require suuuucccchhhh careful de*progr*mm*ng since it puts our life at risk (obviously) we already have multiple prgemd alters created for specific roles when the handlers.. yknow.. did their thing/s. and in the beginning they were only their roles and nothing else. believed nothing else. did nothing else. but now they’ve slowly, over yeeaaarsss slowly started learning what they like. who they are as individuals, that they have a choice. it’s such a gruelling and terrifying process. not even grim is anywhere near

hhh i can barely think or type like i’m being blocked from thinking about this. even my vision is going away as i type. at least i was able to type this much out. it physically hurts to keep trying to access these thoughts so.. not great. hopefully this will be enough to help me think again later