#hhhhghghghghghghghgh. lies face down. i fucking think about joy. a lot

[feline-evil]

Do you ever think about the possibilities of what and who The Boss could have and would have been if she was permitted to be a flesh and blood human being in people's eyes more than a legend, if she was a real, tangible human more than a myth, a tool, a piece in a vast and complicated and everlasting sick political game using her like a hero yet discarding her like a pawn. Do you ever think about Joy. The version of Joy that never got to exist, that could never exist, who was doomed to die as The Boss and be remembered by most as The Boss; a legend, a story, a legacy to uphold instead of a lady who suffered so much and cared so much and was capable of so, so so so SO much bloodied and gory violence but also so much compassion. She's so deeply compelling to me, compelling and mysterious and vague because we really only get to hear about her legend; even when we MEET her we're not really meeting Joy, we can't because she HAS to be The Boss she HAS to play this role in the moment we meet her and we see her AS The Boss. And then she dies. And all we and everyone in that world are left with is a legend and a legacy, and so few remember her as a person outside of that, as a person who existed before that. It's like Joy the person died so long before The Boss did, she's gone by the time we meet her really. And it's all just so very sad to think about!