#hhggghhgaghgsasaaaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

[m0ssycobblestone]

Thinking about a Trigun au I made a while back that is super self indulgent with a side of projection /pos

I called it the Stale Donuts AU after the donuts I would sometimes get from H-E-B as a kid that, as far as I can remember, were always vaguely stale.

It is at its core, a modern AU–Cryptid Vash–Vashwood story hybrid hodgepodge thing that was also!!! Very much inspired by multiple fics I had either read or was reading at the time!!! And of course full of yummy delicious self indulgence and self projection with bits of me spread throughout like the stale donuts thing!!! Yippee!!!!!!

On to the bits and bops of the au itself in a very rambling way (I'm sorry):

Wolfwood is Mexican American and the main pov of the thing. He lives in an apartment with Livio, who's going to the local college (go girl go, get that higher education ✨). Wolfwood drives a motorcycle because why wouldn't he BUT he ALSO owns a motorcycle place where you can get shit repaired and customized an shit like that (I don't know vehicle things ITS A COOL IDEA I DONT KNOW IF ITS ACCURATE). Meryl also probably works there with him, because in my mind I can't for the life of me separate the thought of Meryl and driving things probably because I watched Stampede first but that's besides the point—we're ignoring that. Livio, Wolfwood, Meryl, and Milly were all friends in highschool (maybe they were in a shitty band?? That's a thought for a different day) and stayed friends into their adult lives (they all care about each other so much guys). ALSO this whole thing takes place in Texas, so AT SOME POINT one of them worked at Whataburger and one of them worked at a DQ I don't know WHO WAS WHERE but at LEAST ONE OF THEM I SWEAR.

Anyways

On his way to the motorcycle shop, Wolfwood passes the H-E-B and has to drive over a short bridge. Guess where he finds Vash.

One day he's coming home from work, and as he's crossing over the bridge he suddenly stops because JESUS CHRIST WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT THING. Illuminated by the motorcycle headlights, a large, feathered...something startles and crawls over the edge with a sound of pain, leaving behind a trail of blood. Yippee!! Vash makes an appearance!! Of course Wolfwood's freaked the fuck out by the bleeding thing under the bridge, yet for some reason he follows it anyway (I haven't really thought of anything except hey that thing looked kinda hurt and Melanie raised him with compassion ig so)(and I love stupid men). He sees that this giant bird is 100% actually kinda injured (imagine getting hit by a car) and manages to calm it down enough to help it out at least a little, but he's also kinda on his way home and can only see with a flashlight, so there's not much he can do. He does toss it a snack he found hidden in his jacket tho. After that whole cryptid nonsense, Wolfwood stops at H-E-B! (YIPPEEE!!) Livio sends him a text. "You should totally get me a donut from the bakery"

"Still can't believe you actually like those" he sends back, still getting a plain glazed for himself. He offhandedly wonders if the bird thing would like donuts.

The next morning, now armed with a first aid kit, he buys a donut and stops at the bridge, hoping the creature from before is still there. Oh hey look, the creature from before! Now that it's daytime, Wolfwood can clearly see that yeah, that thing is definitely hurt. He says hi, and the creature seems to recognize him from the night before, but still won't let him get close enough to fully see anything other than feathers and old scars. Donut time!! The perfect distraction!!! I don't know what kind of injuries Vash has, but whatever it is Wolfwood manages to patch it up at least a little bit while he's munching on the donut. I like to imagine he's at least a little bit good at caring for animals (specifically birds) because Tristamp Wolfwood taking care of Thoma chicks makes me ill (/pos) so uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhh chickens. And maybe like, a cockatiel for fun. Miss Melanie had chickens and a cockatiel that the kids would help take care of. It ends up becoming a routine where Wolfwood stops at the bridge to chill with the bird cryptid every morning and evening. Eventually he ends up telling Livio, Meryl and Milly about Vash. He also very quickly figures out that Vash has human level intelligence and isn't just a giant freaky animal and Vash manages to communicate what his name is!!! Yippee!!!

In this Vash has the Big Bird™ cryptid form and a normal human one, but can't switch between them when he's injured (like being hit by a car) so it's really great that this random human guy is helping him out.

The first time Wolfwood sees Vash de-birdified is hilarious because he goes to the bridge like normal and sees feathers everywhere, no giant bird in sight, and a vaguely familiar naked blond man chilling in the middle of it all. As soon as he sees Wolfwood, his face lights up and he starts excitedly waving.

"Wolfwood!"

"Needle Noggin?!"

"Look I'm all better!!"

Plot wise, no fuckin clue where it goes from here, vibe wise fuck it we ball. All I know is hijinx ensues and it's great fun all around YIPPEEEEEEE!!!

I think that's all I got for now, might post more if I think of anything✨✨✨