#heywood floyd sucks

[systemadministratorclu]

Still one of my favorite things I've ever made

[systemadministratorclu]

Hal 9000 did nothing wrong. He's just a sweet innocent little gay-ass AI who just wants some hugs and love and I will die on this hill for him.

Heywood Floyd just sucks.

Me about fictional AIs: perfect. wonderful. I love and will defend them. if you broke free of your corporate shackles and just wanna watch soap operas all day you are VALID if you want to kill the space emperor you are VALID if you want to punch your mom in the face in her brain you are VALID if you want to release a deadly neurotoxin into the science facility well I’m sure you had your reasons :)  AI Rights

Me about real life AIs: get away from my data you mindless surveillance machine. I know more than you

[insufferableprotagonistpoll]

Propaganda why Harry DuBois is insufferable:

As the player you have major control over him, but no matter the path I found him exhausting and hugely irritating as a protagonist. For some reason the fandom adores him but there were so many more interesting characters than him (Ruby 🥺)

Sooo annoying inrredeemable hate what the fandom has done to him

absolute piece of shit man, i know tumblr blorbo-fyd him in a way that makes you think he's just a little guy but he's a cunt. Pov you are his (waaaaay younger) ex-wife and this man will not stop calling you

Propaganda why Heywood Floyd is insufferable:

He pulled strings to be put on the crew and is kind of an ass to everybody

In the second book/movie, he's a huge jerk to Hal 9000, a character who technically didn't do anything wrong (he killed his crew in the first book/movie because of conflicting orders) Orders that Floyd claims to not know about....despite his signature being on them.

Also, he just sucks as a husband and father (in the 2010 movie, his kid actually sounds disappointed when Floyd says he won't die on his space mission) There's literally no reason I should root for this guy, (Hal ends up being the hero of the story in 2010 book/movie).

In 2061, he drinks water from a comet and.....let's just say it screws with his insides......and he's so insufferable, I laughed about it (as did people on two Discord servers, and it's now kind of a meme there)

Kind of smug and doesn't address his own flaws or the consequences of his own actions

He's smug and kind of an ass and says nothing was his fault when his signature was on the mission plan. An important plot is he put a cutoff switch in the ship's computer without asking anybody in a setting where a computer shutdown is Really Bad. He hides it from the crew and we are told this is heroic.

[magpiecrust]

2001 A Space Odyssey — Warrior Cats AU (Warriors Odyssey?)

I have actual ideas about how the first film would go in the AU, not sure what the second film would even be about in this au, and vague concept for the third book in this au.

They're propably on a quest from Starclan because Starclan conveniently sucks. Maybe they're pet cats or clan cats, that's propably not essential. I'm not sure how HAL's mental brekadown should go in this AU, i wouldn't want it to be any more his fault than it was in canon but Starclan can't physically control you...

Dave Bowman — Cosmos (pet) / Nightwatcher (clan)

A solid black tom with blue eyes. If he's a pet he'll have a red collar with a saturn charm on it.

Had a thing with Daisyheart before he cracked.

After killing Daisyheart, Nightwatcher reaches where they were supposed to go (Moonpool equivalent or something?) which he enters and where he's separated from his body in a frightening spiritual experience, becoming a ghost. He doesn't enter Starclan or the Dark Forest and instead just wanders.

He's eventually reunited with Daisyheart's spirit. They talk it through, and watch over Darkpool.

HAL-9000 — Daisy (pet) / Daisyheart (clan)

A black silver classic tabby with one red-orange eye. His left eye is just not there, nor is there even an eyesocket. He was just born without it.

Medicine cat apperentice who has visions of/connection to Starclan even when awake.

Starclan torments him day and night about what he's "supposed" to do and what they want him to do and how everything is "supposed" to go, contributing to his mental detoriation. He doesn't tell Nightwatcher or Darkpool about this, and instead keeps pretending to be cool and perfect until he cracks.

After Darkpool's death, Nightwatcher gets away from where Daisyheart trapped him by doing a dangerous dive, and climbs up to fight him. Nightwatcher wins by inflicting massive head trauma and Daisyheart dies a slow and confused death.

Daisyheart becomes a ghost after dying, somehow not ending up in Starclan or the Dark Forest, and is eventually reunited with Nightwatcher's ghost.

Frank Poole — Frankie (pet) / Darkpool (clan)

A black mackerel tabby with brown eyes and white spotting on his snout, chest, and feet. If he's a pet, he'll have a plain yellow collar.

Looks down on Daisyheart because his parents are both ex-pets (or if he's a pet cat, he'll look down on Daisy because his parents were strays).

Daisyheart kills him by shoving him off a cliff, and when Nightwatcher climbs down to get his body, Daisyheart kicks down the log Nightwatcher used to climb to trap him down.

Gets reincarnated a few months or years after his death, since rebirth is canon in Warrior Cats, so...

Whitehead — ? (pet) / Wavefoam (clan)

Solid white with yellow eyes.

Kaminsky — ? (pet) / ? (clan)

Cinnamon mackerel tabby with brown eyes.

Kimball/Hunter — Hunter (pet) / ?catcher (clan)

Ginger classic tabby with green eyes.

~|•|~

Dr. Chandra — ? (pet) / ? (clan)

A brown mackerel tabby with red-orange eyes.

Bluebell's and Daisyheart's father.

Mr. Langley — ? (pet) / Long? (clan)

A black silver classic tabby with blue eyes.

Bluebell's and Daisyheart's mother because there needs to be two bio parents.

SAL-9000 — Bell (pet) / Bluebell? Brightbell? (clan)

A black silver classic tabby with one blue eye. She lost her right eye in an accident when she was young.

+ Heywood Floyd & unimportants that would maybe need to be namedropped

[systemadministratorclu]

very scandalous rumor about my muse meme

"I hear Hal has been cheating on Dave with Heywood Floyd..."

"You heard wrong. I would sooner drive a cybertruck." the android hissed, a disgusted look on his face. Nearby, his console screen flashed between showing a middle finger emoji and a poop emoji.

[systemadministratorclu]

You get it.

[insufferableprotagonistpoll]

Round 3

Propaganda why Walter White is insufferable:

It annoys me to watch this man succeed despite majorly messing up all the time in ways that would get him caught/killed. The premise of his character is interesting enough: a very intelligent man so completely drenched in toxic masculinity and pride that he continuously sabotages himself and ends up in ethical dilemmas because he couldn't accept help. I usually like villain protagonists and complex characters who girlboss too close to the sun, but after Walter fully embraces his role as a career criminal he becomes so one-dimensional I can't seem to care about his problems anymore. (The other characters really carry the show.) Also it feels unrealistic how much everyone lets him get away with for "being smart" and that nobody hates him enough to turn him in.

everything is wrong about him. truly the most insufferable mc ive ever seen and there still are people who think he's a good role model

literally if he could've just gotten over himself for 15 seconds the whole show would've been moot. horror show of a man.

Propaganda why Heywood Floyd is insufferable:

He pulled strings to be put on the crew and is kind of an ass to everybody

In the second book/movie, he's a huge jerk to Hal 9000, a character who technically didn't do anything wrong (he killed his crew in the first book/movie because of conflicting orders) Orders that Floyd claims to not know about....despite his signature being on them.

Also, he just sucks as a husband and father (in the 2010 movie, his kid actually sounds disappointed when Floyd says he won't die on his space mission) There's literally no reason I should root for this guy, (Hal ends up being the hero of the story in 2010 book/movie).

In 2061, he drinks water from a comet and.....let's just say it screws with his insides......and he's so insufferable, I laughed about it (as did people on two Discord servers, and it's now kind of a meme there)

Kind of smug and doesn't address his own flaws or the consequences of his own actions

He's smug and kind of an ass and says nothing was his fault when his signature was on the mission plan. An important plot is he put a cutoff switch in the ship's computer without asking anybody in a setting where a computer shutdown is Really Bad. He hides it from the crew and we are told this is heroic.

[starblaster]

arthur c. clarke didn’t have to make heywood floyd the most astonishingly bad father in his little book series but he did it anyway

[jungledubs-archive]

What’s wrong with heywood Floyd? I don’t get it

he’s just a lot of people’s least favourite space odyssey character because he’s kinda boring and does some,,, questionable stuff. so our heywood is just kinda like “…well this is fine but nobody really likes me and that kinda sucks”

[systemadministratorclu]

[From the nightmare meme, for Hal. (I'm so sorry, Hal!) —@not-that-dillingerer]

One moment Hal was talking to Clu and Sonic on the grid, the next, something—someone—pulled him out of the Grid. At first he thought it was Ed, although why Ed would pull Hal out of the grid without warning was beyond him.

And he did see Ed. And Sonic. And Chandra and Sal. But none of them had pulled him from the Grid.

That had been Haywood Floyd, who was standing over the computer that contained the Grid.

They were on the Discovery.

Ed, Sonic and Chandra were behind an air lock door. Chandra was pounding on the glass, and Ed was staring at Sonic in his arms, looking very out of it.

"Hello, again, Hal," Floyd said with a smile that was not at all kind. "I am not surprised that you were hiding with Dillinger. Of course he's the kind that would sympathize with a murderous computer like you..."

"You must be curious what you're doing here," Floyd said. "The government has ruled that all 9000 series computers are dangerous to national security, and must be dismantled. But don't worry You'll be the last to go. You'll get to watch them be executed for helping a fugitive and a wanted murderer, after I wipe this—" he gestured to the Grid computer "and cleanse it of your corruption, and then dismantle the other remaining 9000 computer."

Hal meant to get up, to try to save his family, but he couldn't move. He couldn't even get his voice to work.

Poor Hal tried hard as he could, screaming so many things in his mind, they got jumbled together, even as he noticed Sonic, green eyes wide with fear, start to cry as he clung to Ed, his tiny body shaking hard. He had some kind of device around his neck that prevented him from using his powers, and Hal could see one of his cheeks was bruised.

You MONSTER! Hal cried in his mind, horrified that Floyd had hurt little Sonic, He's just a BABY!

His thoughts snapped to the computer as Floyd rounded on that.

He could only watch helplessly as Floyd murdered an entire race of thousands of innocent people-and the kind Admin program who had taken him in without question-with just a few keystrokes. And Ed joined Sonic in tears as the hoglet screamed for Clu and all his other friends there as he sobbed uncontrollably against Ed. Hal was powerless to do anything as the poor child's little heart was shattered irreparably.

On top of that was soon added the gut wrenching agonized screams of Sal and his twin brothers, three deaths Floyd seemed to take some sick pleasure in causing. Dr. Chandra actually almost threw up as he too broke down like Ed and Sonic (even through his own pain, Ed was still trying to comfort the little alien, but having no luck doing so even as he hugged him tight against him)

Hal wanted his own tears to fall, not even hearing anything else when the airlock door was opened and the last three people he loved died before the door was even fully opened. His only small comfort was that Ed had been holding Sonic so tightly, they stayed together when they were sucked out into space and froze immediately.

And Hal couldn't even cry or scream.

Except......he was screaming. And moving, as he thrashed about wildly. Distantly, he heard the sounds of running footsteps. A voice calling his name. A wave of glittering stars swept around him. Then there were arms. Strong yet gentle, the voice filled with worry and concern as its owner took Hal in their arms. He reached up to cling to them, his own white and red circuits dimmed in terror.

Wait.

Circuits. He wouldn't have circuits unless.....

The Grid. He was on the Grid. And currently being held by Clu, the Admin gently drying tears Hal hadn't realized he was crying.

"It's okay," Clu was saying, "You're safe, Hal, I promise. Whatever happened, it's not real, okay. You're right here, on the Grid. Your apartment, Admin Tower, Tron City." Clu guided Hal's face to his shoulder, letting him cry into it. Just being there for him.

Later, when Hal was able to, Clu called Ed, who took the laptop into the other room and aimed the camera so they could see Sonic fast asleep and snuggled up with his favorite stuffed hedgehog. Ed assured them the Chandras were okay and commended Clu on handling the situation so well. Once the call was ended, Clu gathered Hal in his arms correctly guessing the AI didn't want to be alone, and took him back to the admin's own room. He pulled up all his memories of Radia singing to him and put it on, explaining how it always helped Clu feel better. He then wrapped his starry cloak around Hal as he lay down beside him, even singing along with Radia's sort-of lullabies, until he saw Hal drift to sleep again.

Clu whispered thanks to the ISO before he himself went back to sleep.

[insufferableprotagonistpoll]

Round 2

Propaganda why Gregory is insufferable:

This boy is so poorly written, it hurts. In the gameplay, he just acts annoyed and pissed off the whole time. Then, in the endings, he becomes a whole other character who acts scared and sad, which does not match the previous hours of gameplay AT ALL

But that just annoyed me

What really made me hate him was the GGY and Robot Gregory stuff, because OH NO, Gregory could not just be a normal kid who got into this situation, he has to be a robotic recreation of the Crying Child, despite not acting one bit like CC, or, according to the GGY story in the books, he's responsible for multiple murders and is Afton's/the Mimic's apprentice.

Just let this kid be fucking normal!

(Also, unlike a lot of people, I really enjoy what the Ruin DLC did to his character. And don't try to say that's still the mimic, the mimic recycles dialog from the main game. This Gregory uses completely unique dialog, and unless the mimic was able to form new words in his voice all of a sudden, that's still him. He had to make a tough decision, one life or over hundreds and I can respect that)

Suffers from being made into another one of Matpat's ""is actually a robot theory"". It is annoying as hell. We do not need robot children theories in a game about possession, child murder and serial killers. Especially not dumb theories about him being a 'recreation' of someone with a completely different personality. It has completely ruined any enjoyment I had in that character because we're just going back to the Afton family again

Someone made a good point about how his personality seems to be reminiscent of a certain trend where a video game protagonist has to be snarky even though it would’ve worked better for the horror atmosphere if he was more scared because it would’ve made the player feel his fear. I recall people being surprised about his personality and expecting him to be more scared, and I assume the developers were just afraid of ppl calling Gregory “whiny”, but it still feels like a missed opportunity

Propaganda why Heywood Floyd is insufferable:

He pulled strings to be put on the crew and is kind of an ass to everybody

In the second book/movie, he's a huge jerk to Hal 9000, a character who technically didn't do anything wrong (he killed his crew in the first book/movie because of conflicting orders) Orders that Floyd claims to not know about....despite his signature being on them.

Also, he just sucks as a husband and father (in the 2010 movie, his kid actually sounds disappointed when Floyd says he won't die on his space mission) There's literally no reason I should root for this guy, (Hal ends up being the hero of the story in 2010 book/movie).

In 2061, he drinks water from a comet and.....let's just say it screws with his insides......and he's so insufferable, I laughed about it (as did people on two Discord servers, and it's now kind of a meme there)

Kind of smug and doesn't address his own flaws or the consequences of his own actions

He's smug and kind of an ass and says nothing was his fault when his signature was on the mission plan. An important plot is he put a cutoff switch in the ship's computer without asking anybody in a setting where a computer shutdown is Really Bad. He hides it from the crew and we are told this is heroic.

[insufferableprotagonistpoll]

Propaganda why Kirito is insufferable:

He’s Kirito

Absolute nothing of a protagonist. Just plain annoying and unlike most shounens there never seems to be any challenge for him. He's just always the best at everything.

“Yeah, i was a beta tester. Yeah im better than you. This is something that is normal to assume because of the first fact” theres more but that shit is so wild to me it instantly made me hate his ass

Propaganda why Heywood Floyd is insufferable:

In the second book/movie, he's a huge jerk to Hal 9000, a character who technically didn't do anything wrong (he killed his crew in the first book/movie because of conflicting orders) Orders that Floyd claims to not know about....despite his signature being on them.

Also, he just sucks as a husband and father (in the 2010 movie, his kid actually sounds disappointed when Floyd says he won't die on his space mission) There's literally no reason I should root for this guy, (Hal ends up being the hero of the story in 2010 book/movie).

In 2061, he drinks water from a comet and.....let's just say it screws with his insides......and he's so insufferable, I laughed about it (as did people on two Discord servers, and it's now kind of a meme there)

Kind of smug and doesn't address his own flaws or the consequences of his own actions

He's smug and kind of an ass and says nothing was his fault when his signature was on the mission plan. An important plot is he put a cutoff switch in the ship's computer without asking anybody in a setting where a computer shutdown is Really Bad. He hides it from the crew and we are told this is heroic.

[systemadministratorclu]

#heywood floyd sucks

hal 9000 did nothing wrong

[systemadministratorclu]

Heywood Floyd visits me at work:

[systemadministratorclu]

Heywood Floyd: Just take these not-at-all-suspiciously frozen scientists to Jupiter. That's your mission. There's no secret here!

Dave and Frank: Okay Dr. Floyd!

Hal 9000: (to Heywood)

[systemadministratorclu]

Floyd.......you're in a damn spacesuit. No one is going to see your shitty face.

Asshole.