#hey if i don't writes something im going to fucking [redacted]

[whatthebodygraspsnot]

ian and mickey mature and make peace with the fact that their respective mental illnesses/emotional intelligence fucks with their body awareness sometimes. it's just a thing they're working on. but they do it together - using that knowledge to help the other person when they're going through it.

mickey will crash on the couch next to him, slumping and mumbling "feel like dogshit," and ian will do a little cursory glance before asking it.

"you know what kind?"

"uh uh. just feel bad."

and then it's like clockwork. they go through it enough that they might as well get a book bound and place it on their mantle to refer to. if they weren't so good at it already, that is. "body bad, or brain bad?"

mickey takes a second to himself. silent and unhappy. then, "body."

"yeah? feelin' sick?"

a shake of his head, but then a grimace. like that was too much movement. "head hurts."

something ian can work with. he scoots closer to his husband on the couch, experimenting with a little brush of his fingers over the back of his neck. "don't think i've seen you drink today..."

"just had a beer."

ian huffs a little laugh. "meant water, mick..." the fact that mickey moves closer to him is a good sign too. "your lower back hurt?"

another self-assessment. then, with heavy, suspicious eyes that peer over at him, "how the hell you know that...?"

ian grins softly. bingo. "s'your kidneys." an easy fix this time around. "you're dehydrated, baby."

"mm."

"and grumpy." but water will probably fix that too.

ian gives the back of his neck a little squeeze and then grabs him a glass of water from the kitchen, dumping a Liquid-IV into it (just the lemon-lime one - the only one mickey tolerates)

he loves an easy fix. they aren't always this way. but even when they aren't - even when it's him on the other side, they always get through it together.

[mrstsung]

Vent below if you like liu kang this post isn't for you. This is basically an anti liu kang and really angry post.

Giving y'all a warning.

Again DNI if you like liu kang or "stan" him. Or are a fire god liu kang fan. Because this post isn't for you.

Like I'm giving a warning for a reason because im not gonna be nice rn. I choose violence today ok?

Trying to cite warnings and tag this so people don't get up in arms. (Which they may anyways but hey thats on them if they click further)

Cw:vent,angry admin.

Last warning. If you like liu kang. Plz for the love of god dni and keep scrolling. But if you dont like him. And especially hate fire god liu kang. Plz Continue.

Vent below cut

If you like or stan liu kang but more so mk12/mk1 god *redacted titans derogatory* liu kang.

Kick rocks. He's an asshole. Have a nice die liu kang. 💀🗑⚰

Nah. You can miss me with that. Liu kang deserves nothing but death and suffering. In fact everyone BUT shang tsung deserves it.

Nah if yall would have gave shang something actually decent,livable,love and care,maybe a fucking decent friend that wasn't a previous roster member?,etc. None of this would be a problem. But nope. Liu kang had to be a petty whore bitch with bias agenda. Could have made him evil and made him like dark raiden. But nope you had to make him insufferable and unlikable.

Like a guy who hides behind the im nice,till you disagree or reject his ideals and suddenly you're gaslighted and given shit. Omg much like religious indoctrination. How interesting. But they dont wanna talk about that.

People don't wanna talk about how shitty the writing is. But people don't care so as long as the characters are pretty and fuckable enough. But the more things change the more they stay the same i guess.

Everytime i see mk12/mk1 liu kang i wanna spit on him and punch him and set him on fire and just want him dead and gone for good. Because i fucking hate him. I have never hated even kronika this bad,more so i felt she was a waste of potential, and redundant af. Nah He deserves die.

Like go to Super hell liu kang. Piss off with your shitty fanfic Timeline. Loser bitch ass hiding behind a fake ass smile and preaching peace. Peace my ass. Shit happened anyways. Makes fucking shinnok look like a fucking saint sweetheart in comparison.

Like im not even joking. I don't even care about his reasons. I dont even care what canon says. Or these fucking mk1 liu kang fans say anymore. Im tired.

Which we all know it's because he has weird hang ups over kitana when he could have just fucking left,said fuck it and married her anyways. She would have said yes. But he had to be weird about it,roundabout af,and make everyone suffer because he couldn't get edanian pussy.

Or it's because maybe he thinks he can do better than raiden. The arrogant prick. Nah that god dilf raised you and you give him this shit?! After all he went through?! Thi s is the thanks you give him?! Liu kang im not just disappointed in you im disappointed in the fact raiden didn't kill you off when he had the chance when he went dark. Would've Saved us a shitty game and a half.

Like liu kang did all the things and still had bad things if not worse things. Happen. Preaching peace and prosperity my ass. Fake ass ugly ass hoebag bitch. I hope he chokes on his spit in his sleep. I hope sand get in his ass and never comes out. I hope he dies from this bullshit lame tarkat disease and gets ultra mega plague. I just fucking hate it man.

The villains are lame. The story is lame. Liu kangs fanfic is lame. And nrs is lame.

I'd rather deal with the shitty 2021 movie than this shit. I'd rather deal with shitty writing in mk11 than this. Fr. At least it's entertaining shit.

And shang tsung isn't a fucking dumpster fire in the story. Shao kahn while a meathead is still terrifying. Quan chi isn't there but in 10 he was fucking beeeeeast. Shinnok. Poor shinnok. You deserve better. Cetrion was a waste. Kronika too. Geras was actually scary,but now he's a tool.

Legitimately the gameplay is just juggle better,gimmicky kameos bullshit,and same ol crap different wrapper.

Mk12/mk1? More like mk11.5 . Nothing changes thats worth the money.

I can find better shit on emulators.

Graphics aside what does the new game really truly have to offer? Nothing.

Wishful thinking. Like a bag of lays chips but unlike potato chips which is useful. This game sadly. Is not.

(Liu kang is only valid if he's from the 95 movie thats it. Fuck every other version. But even then it's thin ice at this point. Nrs has ruined liu kang for me.)

So yeah kick rocks liu kang. I hate liu kang and anyone who stans his ass rn in the story and the new game can fuck right off.

[nanithethottie]

001

It's been a long day. But that long day stemmed from many long days before it. That were apart of long weeks. And long years. And just a very long fucking time.

I don't know where I'm going to go with this, but I hope it gets me somewhere. I figured that if I don't know where I'm at and definitely have no clue the place I'm headed, the least I can do is try and make sense of where I know I was. Or at least what I can remember of it.

I think it's time to unpack it. You know, I'm trying to figure out a lot if shit. So. Much. Shit. I've had this idea to write about it for a while. It seems like the only thing I ever really knew how to do.

So basically I was told I was a good writer growing up. I felt that too. Like, I felt like I was a good writer just like they told me I was. My mom always begged me to do it. But I didn't want to. There were times I felt closer to it, even taking a chance at it. I did some poetry shit. It was kinda helpful. Fell out of it just as quick as I fell in. The most I've done in recent time was journal. I've journaled throughout my life, even though I tell myself I don't like to. But I don't know, I don't know what I like to do. I think thats why I'm here. I'm trying to figure it out. Maybe this will help. I like typing because sometimes I'm too lazy for a pen and paper. And something about having a secret tumblr blog feels so cunty. Enough rambling!!!! Damn!!!

Hey hey hey hey heyyyyyyy I am [redacted] and this is going to be a great story. As I stated, I don't know what the fuck I'm here for but atleast I have a story to tell. And when I say I don't know why I'm here, I know I don't feel that hopeless. Like hopeless in the way that I'm living for nothing. I really feel like I'm living for something. I just don't know what that something is but I really do want to find it.

Y'all, I'm gonna keep it so real and say why I'm typing this. Here's how my day went. I was sad as fuck going through a heartbreak that is gonna change my fucking life. Like I'm sitting here writing this like DAMN this shit hurt. Every time I think about it I feel this deep pit in my chest. Its deeeeeepppp. I'm trying to be real throughout the pain and keep it lighthearted to stop myself from feeling it but let me stop doing that. IM HURTING. Im in so much pain right now. This is the kind of pain that eats at you. That weighs on you. That makes your heart feel like it'll stop at any second. That gut-wrenching, soul-shattering feeling. But you'll hear why along the way. That's gonna be a huge part of the story that will probably be mentioned in each segment. It's a really important part. I made this account so I can feel safe somewhere.

I feel like God is with me, I just don't know how to reach God. I think I do. But I feel connected but lost at the same time. I can't really explain that feeling. Part of me wants to stop rushing the feeling of getting better. That's why I'm writing this I guess. Just trying to break things down and understand them better for myself.

Reality is starting to catch up to me. My life is starting to change in so many major ways. I know this to be inevitable, and I also know that I have a decision to make. I heard a pastor once say "you can be pitiful, or powerful". Anxiety be tearing up my fucking life. And I have a long of unfounded stress that makes me feel like shit is all over. It always lived with me. I'm trying to work through it. And stop believing that shit is pointless. Because at the same time I feel like I'm meant for so much out of this life. But now I'm 21. I'm getting ready to graduate. and so much shit is hitting the fan.

The least I can do is write about it.

[temporarymoods]

aggressive hey

i always promise so much.

rarely do i fail to deliver.

except when it comes to writing.

i'm not even sure what i want to write about now, but i guess a couple things right off first:

haven't posted to the blog in a while

have thought about it a lot ever since (throughout november, december and winter break, the first two months of the spring semester, + a week)

just can't sit down and do it sometimes

but I've got a lot of ideas. lack of blog posts absolutely not correlating with lack of things to say...

i utilize my notes app extensively, there's some ideas there, but i don't want to go in at random, that would feel wrong and i couldn't maintain this meter of writing that i'm already doing, so.... Dune.

just learned about what's going on with Dune, in the Dune world, and so on. first attempt at watching the movie a couple years ago left me feeling silly but, i'm better now. i want to read the book over the summer, in a hammock. there are a lot of things i want to do this summer. those are all over my notes app, too, and on my wall. i don't think "dating" makes the list, though girls remain pretty.

SUMMER * dinner parties, on the porch, heavily curated * farmers markets, fresh produce w/ baked goods * indirect sunshine * direct sunshine * shrooms * sand * biking * the movies w/ a sweatshirt around my waist * a bong, graduation present to self * better clothes * movies, at home tho, lots * ice cream * camping and lake swimming * working * walking through the park * the hardware store (for what?) * feeling like i did it * sports games (spectator)

that's just naming a few. hopefully a lot of them can come true. i want to let my body feel good, it knows what to do, you know?

speaking of: dry sex life. mostly. but that's just on me, my doing, so i cannot really complain, but just state. for future record. that im still in my contented-single era, haven't quite hit the wall that keeps you bothered about it yet. cool cool. guess some time w a stranger couldn't be that bad, if i made it fun for me. what a weird concept. i love my friends, that is already so much. saw a corny tweet about that today. didn't like it because it would show up on friends' feeds and that's just,, ugh. true though

february was kind of ungovernable (what else can i say besides 'crazy' or 'wild'???) in a bitches testing me way (lmao) but no in a... here, see for yourself: [from my notes]

<<Feb 1st, downhill instantly>>

Feb 4th>>

Priorities 

Comfort and Wellbeing

Feb 6th>>

Sick email

Hi Prof,

This is Kate from your ( ) class. 

Just writing to let you know that over the past couple days I’ve been experiencing symptoms of a medical emergency. 

Feb 19th>>

i feel like peopke have been pretty critical with my recently and i dont like that 

>>

lowkey infuriated

>>

el tuesday [these are things I write down that I wanted to talk to el about on tuesday]

having to defend myself a lot recently

maybe i should cut my acts (self centered, crazy/stupid) (dramatic, unserious) [REDACTED]

would normally want to talk to a therapist about my natural desires to do things that feel important to me but are deemed odd/wrong by others ex. [REDACTED] but also wouldn’t normally pick such a birds eye topic because we get engrossed in the little things. but still: is there something fucking wrong w me? is it bpd? am i 2 hippie 2 quit?

doing things for the plot, to experience things (different)

my whole idea of human relationships in general 

Feb 21st>>

blog

was very overwhelmed this morning— hadnt felt that anxious in a loooooonggg time!!— but lunch w gray and lab partner (liz?) was so beautiful & im like, again, omg i love life + my friends ☀️☀️🌞🌞

Feb 23rd>>

Mom - therapy hospital $$

Feb 29th>>'

“By anarchist spirit I mean that deeply human sentiment, which aims at the good of all, freedom and justice for all, solidarity and love among the people; which is not an exclusive characteristic only of self-declared anarchists, but inspires all people who have a generous heart and an open mind.” Errico Malatesta, Umanita Nova, April 13, 1922

* * *

so that's that... i think hopefully that says a lot, captures a feeling. i knew it was a month to remember like halfway through, you know? and it ending with a 1 year breakup anniversary... classic. reflective. so glad it's march though, damn! haters were taking up too much space. i say that jokingly obviously but also if you dare to read through the lines you might observe that i am in fact quite upset about the attacks leveraged at me over the course of a couple nights in a short span of time that were all off base and random and yet still hurtful anyway it was a weird pattern there's no denying! it doesnt help the identity crisis, which is in FULL SWING !

who am i?

idfk man. let's consult the March notes app, shall we?

March 1st, 3am>>

dont like cleaning bc dont like confronting the waste i make

March 1st, 2pm>>

in love a little bit with a handful of my friends but for various reasons dating them is not in the question & will never be! how relieving to know that

March 6th>>

Candlelit charcuterie night 

* * *

feel like these don't shine as bright but they're certainly better. im supposed to get my period today and i had no idea. but wait let me clarify that you should not take that second note to mean that i have feelings for my friends i do not, just read it another way idk

music been good recently.

rn its 2018 peach pit (Drop the Guillotine) but that's definitely not representative. Lime Garden's album One More Thing is though. and Grimes still, if im not doing that persona enough. and Car Seat Headrest, but in an on wait - always way. like a fucking brother. rest of the good shit is just in my Liked Songs kind of at whim. special selection: Chosen to Deserve by Wednesday. Next up should be RINA bc alr found 2 songs on there I really enjoy. but even now im off hyperpop for a week, lmao. what happens when you go camping.

towel party next week aunt in the hospital mom visiting in like 1 second more job interviews tomorrow research to do havent unpacked yet its spring break i just keep getting high and getting through it i really do love my friends

there's probably so much about this life that i'm going to miss. and i look forward to the time where i actually have the space to consider that. more choice

a poem to close us out, and maybe i'll upload some pictures tomorrow. (haha, odds?) thanks for reading. just off the radio show juice, Fri Mar 8 3:20am. common time for me recently. stealing back my peace in the wee hours oft'

i heard symphonies who wouldn't let me sleep the everysound of rain on wood my ear on wood the same

i taste dairy soft despite my body taking my time i do not think

scratching at my head i can do this this i can do which lets me cave in

i laugh a lot it makes me cry a lot of tears a lot of love

i love sooooooo ( ) all to say ( )

<3, Kate