#hes learned to gently gnaw on you now | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

sixeyesonathiel · 15 days ago

Text

love comes in small sizes

chapter two : sugar, spice and sass

pairing – ex situationship gojo x fem reader

summary : you and satoru have always been something—never labeled, never defined. from jujutsu high to stolen rooftop kisses, your dynamic is a mess of healing hands, half-confessions, and his infuriating habit of getting hurt just to keep your attention.

but when the weight of loss and pride tears you apart, you walk away—until fate (and a tiny, pink-backpack-wearing menace) drags you back into his orbit six years later.

tags –> canon divergence au, fluff, angst, humor, hurt/comfort, unlabeled relationship, grovelling satoru, secret child trope, reunions, miscommunications, second chances, happy ending for my own sanity, satoru is trying his best, reader is petty for a valid reason

previous. | series masterlist. | colletion m.list. | next.

friday dawned peacefully.

the morning sun spills into the small of your apartment, draping the kitchen in soft gold. the air is thick with the scent of buttered toast and freshly brewed coffee, warm and familiar, settling into the quiet rhythm of your mornings. the television hums in the background, some children's show playing on low volume, but neither of you are paying much attention. it’s the kind of peaceful, ordinary morning that feels like a moment suspended in time, familiar enough to feel safe.

shia sits at the table, legs swinging beneath her in that carefree way only children manage. her kindergarten uniform is a soft baby pink, the fabric catching the light as she kicks her feet back and forth. a pair of blue barrettes hold back her bangs, the color popping against her pale hair like small accents on a delicate painting. her blue eyes, so much like his, sparkle with a mischievous gleam that only someone who’s learned how to play innocent can pull off. it’s so subtle, the way she glances up at you through her lashes, but you don’t notice it—how could you? your baby girl, with her soft cheeks and messy hair, is nothing but sweetness to you.

"mommy, you're so pretty today.” she announces, voice syrupy sweet, gaze wide and unblinking, like she’s telling the truth of the universe itself.

you snort, a soft laugh escaping your lips. “you say that every day.”

“because it’s true,” shia insists, taking another bite, her small fingers gripping the toast with the certainty of someone who knows exactly what she’s doing. she doesn’t even look like she’s lying—she looks like your baby girl, all soft curls, round cheeks, and the sparkle of innocence that only you could see.

you don’t think too hard about it. spoiling someone with white hair and blue eyes has always come too easily. your hands move automatically, slicing fruit and arranging it carefully on her plate, the rhythm so familiar it’s almost second nature now. the motion tugs at something deep inside, a memory buried under years of routines and time, something warm that aches without making a sound.

the plate clinks against the table, just a little harder than usual. shia blinks up at you, a few crumbs clinging to her cheek. you gently brush them away with your thumb, smiling softly even as your jaw tightens. it’s a smile you force, though she would never know that—she’s too busy, too wrapped up in being your perfect little girl.

because you’ve been thinking about him again.

not in the way you used to—not with the longing that used to drown you when you were alone, or the ache that sat heavy in your chest. no, now it’s irritation, a sharp, gnawing feeling that rises up every time his stupid face pops into your head, uninvited. that ridiculous white hair. those infuriating blue eyes. how could he still have the nerve to take up space in your mind?

"mommy," shia says, her mouth full of jam as she takes another bite, "you're making your angry face."

you exhale slowly, the soft sound escaping through your nose. six years. six whole years of peace, and now one accidental run-in at the mall had him taking up residence in your head again, like he still had the right. like he mattered.

“i’m not angry,” you lie, smoothing a hand over her neatly combed hair, the soft strands slipping through your fingers. you force the smile a little wider, hoping she doesn’t notice the tightness in your chest. “just thinking about how some people are allergic to common sense.”

shia nods solemnly, as if this is the most logical statement she’s ever heard, and goes back to demolishing her breakfast. her small hands press down on the toast like she’s preparing for battle, eyes focused and intent on the task. and as you watch her, you see nothing but your baby girl—the sweet, innocent little girl you’ve raised. your heart swells as she smiles at you, completely unaware that she might be the most dangerous little angel you’ve ever met.

you sip your coffee, feeling the heat seep through your hands, a comforting presence that contrasts the strange unease creeping into your chest. the hum of the television is still there, but it fades into the background, swallowed up by the soft clinking of dishes and the quiet rhythm of shia’s movements as she munches away at her toast.

it’s when you think of the calendar, of the fact that today is father's day, that the words slip out almost without thinking. “hey, baby,” you begin casually, voice light and carefree, “there’s no event at school today, right?”

shia freezes for just a fraction of a second, a brief flash of hesitation that you almost miss. then, as if nothing at all happened, she shakes her head with an exaggerated innocence. “nope! not at all! school is so boring today, mommy. just… learning! normal school things!”

you narrow your eyes slightly, just a hint of doubt bubbling up. there’s something in the way she said it, too quick, too eager. you lean forward a little, your gaze sharpening. “…you sure?”

shia’s response is immediate and overzealous, her voice practically bouncing with unearned certainty. “super sure!” she says, nodding rapidly as if her enthusiasm could make her words more believable. “sooooo sure! if there was something fun, i would totally tell you, mommy! pinky promise!” she stretches her little pinky toward you, her eyes wide and sparkling with the kind of sincerity she’s mastered.

you can’t help but smile, a soft chuckle escaping you as you hook your own pinky around hers. it’s so easy to fall for it, her childlike innocence radiating from her like sunshine. you don’t even hesitate as you link your fingers together, feeling that familiar warmth of trust flood you.

but then, a strange feeling stirs inside you, a small shift, like a pebble tossed into calm water. it’s not quite suspicion, more like a tiny, nagging doubt. a whisper at the back of your mind, one you push aside with a half-hearted shrug.

why would you doubt her?

shia had always been so honest with you, always so bright and open. there was never a reason to question her, never a reason to believe anything other than the truth she showed you with every smile. she was your sweet girl, after all. an unfiltered ray of light in your life.

but even as you smile down at her, that tiny flicker of doubt remains, like a shadow in the corner of your mind. you shake it off, focusing instead on the soft warmth of her hand in yours, the trust in her small, bright eyes. everything is fine. you’ve raised her right, after all.

the conversation lingers in the air like the faint hum of the television, but the doubt that still clings to you refuses to dissipate. you try to push it away, focusing on the moment, on your daughter’s wide, sparkling eyes, but something doesn’t sit right. your fingers trace the rim of your coffee mug absently, the warmth from the cup a small comfort that doesn’t quite reach the tight knot in your chest.

“hm,” you hum softly, still feeling like something is off. the words slip from your lips almost without thinking, your gaze still lingering on her small form as she picks at her toast. “it’s just weird. didn’t you always want to go to father’s day events before?”

shia, still as bright as ever, doesn’t seem phased. she tilts her head to the side, her eyes momentarily shifting toward the plate in front of her as she stuffs another piece of toast into her mouth. a classic distraction tactic. “hmmm?” she asks, her voice muffled by the food.

“i mean, i used to take you, right?” you continue, a slight furrow appearing on your brow as the pieces of the conversation begin to not quite fit together. “in nursery, in pre-kindergarten, even those little parties or circus for father’s day.”

shia hums, as though in deep thought, her small shoulders shrugging nonchalantly as if she’s far too mature to be caught up in those things anymore. “mommy,” she says seriously, her voice the perfect mix of innocence and childish gravitas, “that was baby me. i am grown-up now. very mature.”

you bite back a smile, amused despite the gnawing confusion. “oh, yeah? very mature?” you tease, your tone light, trying to keep the conversation playful, even as your mind churns with unanswered questions.

“yep!” shia nods vigorously, as if this was the most obvious thing in the world. “besides, i only liked those events ‘cause you came. i don’t need to go anymore!”

the memory of those events stirs within you, a clear image of shia so eager, so excited, even when she was too young to fully understand what father’s day was about. she used to love those events, always wanting to be a part of them, her little face lighting up with the thought of celebrating the day with you.

your thumb continues to circle the smooth rim of your coffee mug, your gaze drifting to your daughter once more. there’s a small shift in her posture, her usual bounce replaced with something a little more... still, as if she’s suddenly grown much older than she looks.

the nagging doubt presses on you again, that small whisper of unease that refuses to fade. but shia is too bright, too sweet, her every movement so convincing, so full of the carefree energy that used to make her unstoppable. her eyes shimmer with feigned sincerity, her little fingers gripping the edges of the table with an earnestness that makes you want to believe her.

maybe you're just overthinking it. after all, she’s your baby girl. she’s always been so open, so honest, so real with you. and in the end, you dismiss the doubt, telling yourself there's no reason to question her—she's just growing up, that's all.

with a soft sigh, you finish your coffee and stand up, stretching your arms as you watch shia finish her toast, her small hands gripping the edges of the plate with exaggerated care.

“alright, let’s go. i’ll drop you off.” you say, your voice gentle, as you reach for your keys.

shia freezes, her body stiffening for just a moment before she quickly forces a smile. “oh! no! you don’t have to, mommy! i can go by myself!” her words come out a little too fast, a little too rehearsed.

you raise an eyebrow, a silent question passing between you and her. "you never want to go alone."

she squirms in her seat, her legs swinging beneath her as she looks away, almost nervously. “i-it’s good to be independent! i am a responsible young lady!” shia puffs her chest out proudly, trying to look as grown-up as she can.

kneeling down in front of her, you fix her bangs and smooth out the uniform she’s wearing, the pink fabric soft under your fingers. “you’re acting weird today, baby.” you murmur, eyes narrowing as you study her.

shia bats her eyelashes exaggeratedly, her lips curling into an innocent smile. “i am always a delight.”

you squint at her, something in your gut telling you there's more to this than she's letting on. but with a small sigh, you shrug it off, deciding that maybe it's just one of those mornings.

the moment hangs in the air, and you wonder if you’ve been overthinking things all along. just as you start to let the doubt fade, shia suddenly wraps her little arms around you in a move so sweet it almost knocks the breath out of you.

”mommy,” she says, her voice dripping with sugary innocence.

you blink, caught off guard by the sudden affection. "what’s this for?"

“just 'cause!” she giggles, her charm cranked up to a level you’ve only seen in the movies, like she’s auditioning for a role in the most dramatic, heart-melting scene.

you feel your heart soften, that maternal instinct rising to the surface as you smile. “aw, my sweet girl.”

“the sweetest!” she agrees, voice as innocent as ever. but behind that sweetness, there’s a flicker of mischief, a glimmer of a plan you still can’t see.

before you can even respond, shia grabs her little bag, her tiny feet barely touching the floor as she runs toward the door. “bye, mommy! love you! have a great day!” she calls over her shoulder, her voice high-pitched with excitement.

you blink, watching her dash away, the sound of her footsteps growing fainter. you stand there for a moment, unsure of what just happened. “...okay, that was weird.”

with a sigh, you shake your head as if trying to clear the strange feeling building in your chest. you turn back to the apartment, the calm stillness of the morning settling around you again. but little do you know, the quiet peace you just experienced will be short-lived. you have no idea that your daughter, with her sweet smile and perfect little act, is currently plotting something far more devious—something involving the strongest sorcerer alive. and before you know it, your peaceful days will be a distant memory.

the sound of shia’s footsteps slowly fades into the distance, and you’re left standing in the quiet hallway, staring at the door as if it might open again any moment. the silence is heavier now, filling the space around you in a way it didn’t used to. it’s strange—once, you craved this quiet, the absence of noise, the stillness of being alone. now, it feels suffocating, like something you never really wanted to begin with.

you close your eyes for a moment and breathe out, trying to shake off the sudden weight that presses down on your chest. slowly, you turn away from the door and step back into the apartment. the air feels colder, the emptiness sharper. you’ve grown accustomed to this kind of solitude, but it doesn’t make it easier to bear. it never has.

time has a way of softening things, of eroding the edges of painful memories, making them easier to live with. you’ve learned to let go of the sharpest parts, the parts that cut the deepest. the past, now, feels distant—a faded scar, no longer throbbing, but still there, a reminder of everything you once had and everything you lost. it doesn’t sting like it did before, but the reminder of it lingers, just beneath the surface.

but there are some things time can’t dull. there are moments—fleeting, sharp—that still come crashing in like they did all those years ago. the memory of him, the way he was, the way you both were together, comes back with a sting, a lingering ache deep in your chest. it’s so stupid, how something so simple—something as unlabeled as your relationship with him back in high school—still has such a powerful hold on you.

you wonder, sometimes, if he ever thinks about those days too. or if he’s completely moved on, leaving everything behind like it was nothing more than a phase in his life. you wonder if he still remembers you the way you remember him—like a dream that once felt real, but is now so distant, so impossible to reach. you thought time might erase the hurt, that it would get easier to forget, but it never has.

six years. six long years of figuring things out on your own. it wasn’t like you had a plan—no blueprint, no clear direction. you didn’t land a high-paying corporate job like nanami or anything that gave you a sense of stability. instead, you found yourself working odd jobs, like convenience store shifts at night. sometimes you’d look at yourself in the mirror and wonder how you got here, how this was your life now. how, after everything, the only thing you could rely on was yourself.

and yet, despite all the hardship, despite the loneliness that crept in at night when you were most vulnerable, you kept moving forward. leaving him, leaving everything behind, had been a decision you made to protect your child. you had to do it—there was no other choice. you had to be strong for shiyana, even when your own heart felt so heavy. you couldn’t afford to be weak, not when she needed you more than anyone ever had.

it wasn’t easy, and it still isn’t. there were nights you cried until you couldn’t breathe, nights when the weight of everything threatened to crush you. but you built something, somehow. you found a way to survive in a world that wasn’t made for people like you—people who had been caught between two worlds, two lives. you built a life that was yours, even when everything felt like it was falling apart.

and standing in this apartment now, with the silence closing in around you, you realize something—something you didn’t understand back then. you did it without him. you made it without him, and you survived. and for the first time in a long time, it feels like peace—real peace, not just a fleeting moment, but something solid, something you earned.

it was impossible to forget him. not when you could see pieces of him every day in your daughter—his eyes, his bright, striking blue eyes. it was as if shiyana wore them as a reminder of him, and every time she looked at you with that innocent gaze, your heart would lurch. the resemblance was undeniable, and it hit you like a wave, drowning you in memories of a past you tried so hard to forget.

those moments were the hardest, when she was sleeping, her tiny hands curled into the blanket, her soft breaths rising and falling peacefully. in those quiet, still moments, when everything was calm and perfect, you would feel a tightness in your chest. it was like something was clawing up your throat, threatening to break free, and you'd have to swallow it back down, fighting against the sharp sting of it all.

but then, just as quickly, she would stir, her little voice calling out in that sweet, familiar way: ‘mommy... cuddle...’ and all the ache, all the sharpness, would melt away. you’d pull her close, grounding yourself in the warmth of her small, soft body, and remind yourself that it didn’t matter. satoru was the past, his memory tied to old scars. this, here and now, was your present—your daughter, your life.

god, shia was such a good kid. she had her moments, of course, the occasional tantrum or the stubborn little streak that would flare up, but those were fleeting. the way she would always snuggle up to you at night, curling into your side, asking for bedtime stories, reaching for your hand in crowded places—it all made your heart swell. even now, at five years old, she still had those babyish tendencies that made you feel like time hadn’t passed at all, like she was still your baby.

your heart squeezes at the thought, that overwhelming tenderness you always feel when you look at her, because, in so many ways, she still was just a baby. and yet… she was becoming so independent. so determined. you smile softly, remembering how confidently she ran off this morning, insisting on going to school alone, like she was all grown up.

“she’s growing up,” you murmur to yourself, shaking your head fondly. “still my baby, though.” the words come out a little wistful, a little bittersweet, because even though you knew this day would come, it still stung to watch her step further away from you, inch by inch.

but what you don’t know—what you couldn’t possibly know—is that your sweet, innocent daughter just blackmailed a certain white-haired sorcerer. she had no idea what she was setting in motion, but gojo satoru was now unknowingly walking straight into a trap, one meticulously crafted by the very person who should have been his innocent joy.

your peaceful morning, the one you thought was just another quiet moment in your routine, was the calm before the storm. and you had no idea that, just around the corner, a category five disaster was waiting to unfold—one that would change everything.

satoru was not prepared for this.

sure, he’d spent the past few days trying to convince himself this wasn’t a big deal. just one day, he repeated to himself, trying to brush off the fact that he was about to spend it pretending to be a father to a little girl who had somehow blackmailed him into this ridiculous role. just one day. that’s what he told himself, yet it wasn’t working. not when this little girl just happened to be his child. not when his mind kept circling back to sunday, to seeing you again—standing there after so many years, a ghost of everything he had lost. not when this little girl just happened to be his child.

he had made no effort to cross the distance between the two of you, built his walls, convinced himself that he didn’t need to feel the weight of your absence. but now, he couldn’t escape it. the guilt, the regret. he’d been miserable, he knew that much. but it was his fault. the way he’d acted when suguru defected, when you’d told him you were leaving the jujutsu society. all the pride, the childishness—he hadn’t even tried to stop you. he let you go. no, scratch that. it was worse. he had pushed you away when you needed him the most.

now? now he had a daughter—his daughter—standing in front of him, and the weight of that truth left him reeling. he didn’t know her favorite color. didn’t know if she feared thunderstorms or begged for bedtime stories. hell, he didn’t even know her name. how was he supposed to bridge six years of absence in a single day? how can he even apologize for missing first steps, lost teeth, every scraped knee he never kissed better?

sure, he had experience with megumi—had taken legal guardianship of the reserved, utterly disinterested six-year-old barely a month after you left. back then, it had been simple: keep the zenin away, teach the kid to throw a punch, and ignore how they both flinched at raised voices. megumi had been all quiet glares and stubborn silence, a shadow satoru learned to navigate through trial and error.

but his daughter?

she was sunlight and chaos, all his worst traits polished into something terrifyingly vibrant. where megumi had been stoic, she was loud; where he’d been cautious, she charged ahead with the confidence of someone who’d never been told no. and satoru—the man who’d faced curses and gods without breaking a sweat—had no damn clue what to do with a five-year-old who looked at him like he was the one who needed parenting.

at least megumi never blackmailed him. probably because the kid had the emotional range of a brick at that age.

the irony burned. he’d raised a child who hated him (temporarily), but the one who should’ve been his from the start? he’d failed her and he can’t even defend himself by saying he did not know about your pregnancy because he brought this to himself.

his footsteps were slow as he neared the school gate. his palms felt clammy despite the summer heat, and the cool breeze barely brushed against his skin. he wasn’t sure if it was nerves, guilt, or something else entirely—probably all of it. but as the gate drew closer, he caught sight of her.

he spotted her right away. it was impossible to miss. even in a crowd of parents and children, she stood out. her posture—confident, like she owned the damn place—was unmistakable. little hands on her hips, chin lifted just enough to say, I’m in charge here. her uniform looked like it had been pressed to perfection, not a wrinkle in sight. her bangs barely moved with the wind. she looked like a tiny dictator, and it was both terrifying and incredibly endearing.

satoru stopped, watching her for a moment. she was waiting for him. of course she was. she planned this. the way she stood there, eyes narrowed slightly, her expression one of quiet authority—it was like she knew exactly how this was going to play out. it was the same look he’d seen reflected from people’s eyes each time they’re facing him, a thousand times.

his chest tightened a little at the thought. she really is mine, isn’t she?

the familiar tug of his heartstrings made him pause. she was small, but so sure of herself—so much like him. every movement she made, every little gesture, seemed to demand attention, to command the world around her. and yet, beneath it all, he knew—just from the way her small shoulders were set, the way her hands rested on her hips—that she wasn’t pretending to be something she wasn’t. she wasn’t just playing a role. she was real, and she was his.

he was about to play pretend father for a day, sure. but what really scared him was how much he wanted to do this right. how much he needed to get it right, even if he had no clue how.

satoru slows to a stop in front of her.

he doesn’t say anything at first—just stares. just looks. because, really, what the hell is he supposed to do with the tiny little person standing in front of him, hands on her hips, her small foot tapping against the pavement like she’s waiting for him to mess up? the sharp white of her hair catches in the light, silky and unruly all at once, just like his own, but softer—fluffier. her eyes, impossibly blue, lock onto him with something eerily familiar, assessing him with the same sharpness he’s seen in the mirror a thousand times before.

his chest aches. tightens. because her little shoe—tapping, tapping, tapping—follows the exact same rhythm his did every time yaga scolded him about responsibility.

“…yo,” he says. like an idiot.

she exhales through her nose, unimpressed. “took you long enough.”

her voice is sweet, but there’s a bite to it, her little foot picking up its rhythm again. impatient. confident. like she’s allowing him to be here but isn’t particularly impressed with his performance so far. she has my audacity, satoru thinks, almost dizzy at the realization.

he kneels down in front of her, resting his forearms against his thighs. he tries to match her energy, keep this light, keep himself from losing his mind over how much she looks like him. “geez, is this how you always treat your pretend daddy?” he teases, tilting his head with a grin. it’s weak, though—he knows it, and judging by the unimpressed look on her face, she does too.

but then—she blinks at him, tilting her head, studying him in a way that makes his throat dry. there’s something almost playful in her stare, like she’s already figured something out that he hasn’t. then, without hesitation—she smiles.

and it’s sweet. sickeningly so. soft and innocent, like she’s got no idea what she’s doing to him. “hi, daddy.”

satoru chokes on air.

oh. oh, that was evil.

it’s a miracle he doesn’t keel over right then and there. his lungs seize up, and he has to physically stop himself from reacting any further because damn, she just threw that out there with no warning, no hesitation, no mercy. it’s a simple greeting, a child’s word, but his body betrays him—his fingers twitch, his heart stumbles over itself, and something warm and terrifying blooms in his chest.

he clears his throat, scrambling for composure, pretending his entire worldview hasn’t just tilted off its axis. “well, uh,” he manages, voice cracking slightly, “what’s my dear daughter’s name?”

her expression shifts instantly. eyes narrowing, lips pursing just slightly. suspicious.

“you don’t know?” she repeats, her tone edging on scandalized. her tiny arms cross over her chest, her little nose scrunching up. “i thought you were friends with mommy.”

satoru swears he can hear his brain short-circuiting.

“she never told me!” he blurts, holding his hands up in defense. he’s not lying, technically, but his kid doesn’t look convinced. she only squints harder, as if searching his face for the truth.

the dramatics continue. she sighs, heavy and exaggerated, like she’s already exasperated with him, and it’s so damn familiar that his stomach twists itself into knots. her little shoulders lift as she takes a deep breath, and then, with the most princess-like tilt of her chin—

“shiyana.”

it hits him like a truck.

the name rolls around his mind, gets stuck somewhere in his throat, then echoes back tenfold. shiyana. it fits. it fits so well he almost wants to say it out loud just to make it real. his lips part, and without meaning to, he’s already testing how it would sound with his last name. shiyana gojo.

…oh. oh, it really fits.

his chest swells with something dangerous, something warm and insistent. something that tells him this is his kid, even if she doesn’t know it. even if she’s just playing pretend.

“huh,” he muses, tilting his head, “your mommy’s got good taste.”

shiyana preens.

her hands find her hips again, and she tips her chin up even higher, practically glowing with the compliment—not for herself, but for her mom. mommy’s girl through and through.

“she does.” shiyana says, nodding matter-of-factly.

satoru lets out a soft huff, watching her. she’s a diva, a miniature force of nature, all attitude and presence, but still so obviously a kid. still so small. and she looks like him—god, she looks so much like him, but her features are softer, more childlike, her face still round with baby fat.

she’s a perfect reflection of him, even at five years old. her confidence, her audacity, her entire existence—it’s all his.

and that’s terrifying.

satoru doesn’t get much time to process the weight of her name in his mouth, nor the way it tugs at something deep in his chest, because shiyana is already moving. her tiny fingers curl around his wrist, and before he can react, she’s dragging him forward with the unshakable confidence of a queen leading her knight into battle.

“come on, daddy,.” she huffs, as if she’s already tired of waiting on him.

he stumbles slightly, caught off guard, before falling into step behind her. her grip is firm, determined, and despite the fact that she barely reaches his thigh, she marches ahead like she owns the place. he lets her lead, lets her set the pace, and the moment they step past the school gates, the scene that greets them is… well.

it’s a mess.

the kindergarten courtyard is swarming with middle-aged dads, most of them stuffed into polos that are just a little too tight, their bellies straining against tucked-in waistbands. the air hums with the chaotic energy of children shrieking, laughing, weaving between slow-moving adults. someone’s dad is already sweating through his shirt. another one is awkwardly trying to corral a kid who has decided now is the perfect time to practice cartwheels.

satoru, in his casual outfit, his stupidly sharp jawline, and his stupidly tall frame, might as well be a supermodel dropped into a discount dads convention. he stands out immediately, a beacon of effortless cool against a sea of tired men.

and shia knows it.

“this is my daddy!” she announces, loud and proud, her voice cutting through the noise like a blade.

three nearby moms flinch so hard they spill their tea. a few other parents turn to stare. satoru barely gets a second to enjoy the attention before the swarm arrives.

five-year-olds close in like tiny, curious vultures.

“he’s so tall...” whispers a boy with a stubborn cowlick, staring up at satoru like he’s seeing a giant for the first time.

“he has white hair like shia-chan!” gasps a girl, clutching a glittery unicorn plush.

“i bet he’s really strong.” mutters a kid with ketchup on his shirt, squinting like he’s assessing a worthy opponent.

satoru preens, tilting his chin, adjusting his sunglasses just enough to flash a bit of his baby blues. he can already feel his ego inflating, already hear the perfect response forming—

“obviously i’m strong—”

"daddy," shia interrupts, voice flat, tiny fingers pinching his wrist with just enough force to make him wince. “stop bragging. it’s tacky.”

satoru gapes. for the first time in possibly his entire life, he is momentarily stunned into silence.

the other kids watch with wide eyes. the moms are pretending not to eavesdrop. satoru, a man who has faced death countless times, finds himself standing in the middle of a kindergarten courtyard, held in check by a five-year-old with his own eyes and an absurd amount of attitude.

and worst of all?

she’s right.

the teacher’s approach is precise, clipboard in hand, her polite smile just a little too sharp. she navigates through the sea of children and fathers in strained polos with the air of someone used to keeping chaos in check. when she stops in front of them, her gaze flicks from shia to satoru, assessing.

“ah, you must be shia’s father! her mother never mentioned you.”

satoru’s fingers twitch. he should’ve expected that, really. six years ago, he would’ve met a line like that with a grin and an obnoxious joke, something ridiculous enough to make the moment less heavy. now, he just scratches his cheek, the motion uncomfortably hesitant, like he’s standing in front of yaga again, about to be scolded. because of course you never mentioned him. “uh, yeah. i, uh—”

“mommy’s really busy,” shia interrupts, her voice light, her expression so open and guileless that it could convince even the most skeptical. she tilts her head just slightly, lashes fluttering as she continues, “she doesn’t talk about daddy a lot!”

the teacher’s gaze flickers between his guilty expression and shia’s wide-eyed innocence. satoru sees the exact moment she accepts it, the way her shoulders loosen, the way her polite smile shifts into something softer.

“…i see.” she says, nodding, no longer suspicious. she then excuses herself with a nod to greet other parents, leaving the two.

satoru almost laughs as soon as she left, his ego flaring up instantly. damn, she’s good. he opens his mouth, already gearing up to say something about how she definitely got that from him, but the second his hand reaches out to ruffle her hair—

slap.

shia bats his hand away like an annoying fly. she doesn’t even look at him when she does it, like she knows he’s about to embarrass himself. “daddy.” she says, with the same tone one might use to scold a misbehaving dog.

he blinks, caught somewhere between surprise and amusement. “what? i can’t be proud of you?”

shia sighs, clearly long-suffering at the ripe age of five. “yeah, well, you’re tacky when you’re proud.”

he wants to argue, but honestly? fair. she really just saved his ass. and she knows it. he grins. that’s my kid, alright.

the game booths line the edge of the courtyard, each one promising cheap plastic prizes that gleam under the afternoon sun. children weave through the crowd with determined faces, clutching plushies and keychains like war trophies, their victories hard-earned and well-fought. but shia? shia stands with her hands on her hips, surveying the battlefield with the sharp eye of a commander assessing the worth of her troops.

her gaze locks onto her target—the grand prize of the ring toss booth, a massive stuffed panda hanging triumphantly from the display rack, half her size and twice as important. she doesn’t just want it. she needs it.

“daddy, i want that one,” she declares, chin tilted up, her voice carrying the confidence of someone who has never considered the possibility of failure.

satoru follows her gaze, then grins. “easy.”

she watches as he steps up to the booth, a picture of effortless ease. the ring toss is simple, at least in theory—a wooden post stands a few feet away, waiting for a ring to land around it. the other dads have tried and failed, their rings clattering uselessly onto the floor. some have hit the post, some have gone embarrassingly wide, and one unfortunate man in a ‘#1 papa’ shirt is still rubbing his temples in frustration.

satoru doesn’t bother aiming. he just flicks his wrist lazily, like it’s not even worth his full effort.

the first ring lands perfectly, sliding onto the post without a sound.

the second bounces once—twice—then ricochets off the head of the salty dad from earlier, hitting him with an almost insulting level of precision.

the third? it loops around the post twice before settling in place, as if even gravity itself has decided to play along with his nonsense.

silence falls over the booth.

then—

“that’s not physically possible!” someone yells, voice cracking under the weight of pure disbelief.

children wail. a mother gasps. the dad satoru hit glares daggers at him, rubbing the sore spot on his scalp like he’s about to file a case against satoru.

satoru adjusts his sunglasses with an infuriating amount of ease, the corners of his mouth twitching into a smirk. “skill issue.”

shia exhales through her nose, unimpressed but begrudgingly satisfied. she steps forward as the booth attendant hesitates, looking between satoru and the rings as if debating whether he just witnessed sorcery. finally, the man sighs, reaches up, and unhooks the stuffed panda from the display.

shia takes it with the air of a queen accepting tribute, hugging it against her chest. her fingers sink into the plush fabric, and for the first time today, she allows herself to be pleased.

“good job, daddy.” she says, and this time, it doesn’t sound patronizing.

satoru practically beams. progress.

next up is the three-legged race.

shia eyes the competition as they line up—other father-child pairs, all tied together at the ankles, shifting anxiously as they brace for disaster. it’s a game of coordination, teamwork, and—above all—trust. none of which she and satoru particularly excel at.

except, satoru is a cheater.

shia doesn’t even bother pretending to run. she just folds her arms, lets her legs dangle, and resigns herself to the inevitable as satoru takes four long strides across the finish line, dragging her along effortlessly. behind them, chaos erupts—dads and kids trip over each other, some collapse in tangled heaps, and one particularly determined father tries to crawl across the dirt, his child clutching his back like a desperate jockey.

“cheater!” yells a red-faced man clutching his son like a fallen soldier.

shia, upside down and completely unbothered, blows him a raspberry.

satoru snickers, lifting his sunglasses just enough to wink. “cope.”

by the time they reach the final game, the dads are seething, the kids are in awe, and shia? shia is looking at him like he might actually be worth keeping around.

the pin the tail on the donkey booth looms ahead, the last test in his trial of fatherhood. the teacher hands him a blindfold, smiling sweetly, unaware of just how unfair this is about to be.

“no peeking,” she warns, her voice laced with gentle authority.

satoru ties the blindfold securely, the fabric pressing against his closed lids—but it doesn’t matter. six eyes, spatial awareness—he doesn’t need to see. he spins once, for dramatic effect, then steps forward with precise confidence and pins the tail dead center.

perfect placement. exact alignment. even the donkey looks smug.

a pregnant pause.

“that’s it.” snaps a dad with a dad-bod and a vengeance. “i’m getting the principal.”

shia’s eyes shine with something sharp, something victorious. she clutches her panda tighter, watching as her so-called pretend dad obliterates the competition without breaking a sweat.

she chose well.

shia glows with satisfaction as she collects her prizes, her little arms struggling to hold onto her spoils of war. the massive stuffed panda is already secured in a vice grip, but now she has an assortment of keychains, a plastic tiara, and—because satoru is an absolute menace—one of the losing dads’ dignity. she stands triumphant in the middle of the courtyard, chin lifted, basking in the aftermath of her ruthless campaign. the other children watch her with a mix of awe and terror, their fathers still nursing their wounded pride.

“we’re the best team,” she declares, her smirk nothing short of victorious.

satoru grins down at her, pushing his sunglasses up the bridge of his nose. “obviously.”

shia beams up at him, and something warm curls in his chest—something that has nothing to do with his usual self-satisfaction. for once, the praise isn’t coming from himself, isn’t coming from the blind adoration of others who only see his power. it’s coming from her, from the sharp little girl who had blackmailed him into this, and for some reason, that makes it feel like the most genuine victory he’s ever had.

(he has never felt this kind of pride in his entire life.)

as the event wraps up, shia tugs on his sleeve, her tiny fingers curling into the fabric. he looks down, still caught in the lingering glow of their success, and the weight of the word that comes next nearly knocks him off balance.

“daddy.”

he still isn’t used to it. it’s just pretend, just a game, but it sinks into his ribs like something real. he doesn’t know if he ever will be used to it.

“yeah?”

she pauses, eyes flicking up to his like she’s measuring him, weighing something in her mind. then, with all the gravitas of a seasoned judge passing a verdict, she nods.

“you’re kinda cool.”

satoru feels his ego inflate to dangerous levels. “kinda?” he echoes, hand over his chest like she’s mortally wounded him. “excuse me, princess, but i just single-handedly dominated every single game here. you mean ‘ridiculously, impossibly cool,’ right?”

shia sniffs, unimpressed. “eh. i might hire you again next year.”

he chokes on a laugh. “hire?”

she gives him a knowing look, tilting her head just slightly. “you work for me, don’t you?”

he squints down at her, expression torn between amusement and genuine concern for her future enemies. “you mean you might blackmail me again?”

“tomato, tomahto.”

he throws his head back, cackling. god, he adores this kid. he’s so down for this. “sounds like a deal to me, kiddo.”

except his amusement flickers slightly, because while he’s completely on board for round two of this chaos, there’s one tiny, insignificant problem.

the love of his life.

her mom.

aka, you.

aka, the person who might actually skin him alive if you found out he’s discovered shia’s existence and is associating with her behind your back.

satoru clears his throat, suddenly hyper-aware of the fact that he has, in fact, not informed you about any of this yet. “uh, small thing though—your mom won’t, like, murder me, right?”

shia tilts her head, considering. then she shrugs. “hmm. you should probably start running now.”

his grin is a little nervous now. “i’ll take my chances.”

(he will absolutely take his chances. she’s worth it.)

victory suits his daughter so well he forgot about the guillotine hanging over his head.

she stands proudly, a perfect little diva surrounded by her hard-won prizes. the stuffed panda, the keychains, the plastic toys—they’re all hers now, each item a trophy of her unexpected conquest. she beams at each one, spinning them in her hands with a joy that’s almost infectious, and satoru can’t help but smile as he watches her.

there’s something that hits him deep, though. for the first time, he really sees her—the smallness of her, the way she holds herself with such confidence. he’s missed five years. five whole years. and he’s spent them wondering about her, wanting to know her, wanting to be a part of her life, and now, she’s here, standing in front of him with a pride that matches his own. he can’t shake the feeling that this is just the beginning.

the event’s over, but that doesn’t mean his ‘dad’ duties are done. satoru would have been fine with it—happy, even—but the problem is, shia can’t go home yet. why? because you, her mom, still think it’s just another school day, completely unaware of what’s transpired. so here he is, strong and unflappable satoru gojo, now officially on babysitting duty.

he tries to suppress the laugh bubbling up inside him, unsure whether he should be jumping for joy or preparing for the inevitable wrath you’ll unleash when you find out. the only thing certain? this is going to be one interesting situation to explain later.

“alright, squirt,” satoru says, leaning back slightly with his hands tucked into his pockets. “what do ya wanna do?”

shia doesn’t look up immediately, too busy rearranging her prizes, but her voice cuts through the air like a knife.

“squirt?” she repeats, her tone laced with a judgment that only someone who’s spent years perfecting sass could manage.

“what? you’re tiny.” he says with a grin, shrugging his shoulders nonchalantly.

“you’re abnormally tall.” she shoots back, her gaze still narrowed as she sizes him up. her response is a punchline in itself, and satoru can’t help but chuckle.

tch. the sass. it’s so familiar. she totally got that from him.

he watches her for a moment longer, his chest full of a warmth he hasn’t felt in a long time. she’s not just some random kid to him anymore. she’s his daughter, and even if she only blackmailed him into being here, there’s no doubt in his mind that he’s not going anywhere. but the looming thought of what might happen when you find out... well, he’ll cross that bridge when it comes. for now, he’s just glad to have this moment with her.

after all, things are about to get a whole lot more complicated when you find out what he’s been up to.

a/n : i felt like writing this chapter was boring probably because there is a minimum amount of crack and i just cant not write bullshit. just had to establish some stuff this chapter, it'll get asinine and silly again next chapters 🥰 this would've released much earlier but i kept dozing off while writing omg

tag list: @funicidals @coffeeluvr96 @wolywolymoley @ineednanami @luv3nti @nikilig @linaaeatsfamilies @nariminsstuff @cherryredkissez @lolightrealm @myahfig4 @kaged-kitty @s4ikooo1 @buni-bunnydoll @ssetsuka @mintcheery @starsyoongi @sorilyae @mashtura @enhasrii @kunisnaomi @susususukanana @seikamuzu @asahinasstuff @venusss-ss @satoruxsc @emochosoluvr @sleepykittyenergy @moncher-ire @byakuya61085 @ayumilk @astudyoftimeywimeystuff @holylonelyponyeatingmacaron-blog @balsalmic-vinegar @altgojo @esotericsorrow @44ina @jkslvsnella @reihimbo @flowerpot113 @kxgumi @emryb @yukinemaroop @nonamebbsblog @1uv4jiya @bibisaur @juujujs @kanekisheart @katsukiseyebrows @alygator77

comment to be added on the tag list xx

#gojo x reader #gojo satoru #gojo x female reader #reader insert #cross posted on ao3 #gojo fluff #jjk x reader #jjk fanfic #gojo satoru x reader #satoru gojo x reader #satoru gojo x you #gojo satoru x y/n

613 notes · View notes

rafeandonlyrafe · 11 months ago

Text

first moments

words: 1.5k

warnings: mom!reader, dad!rafe, established relationship, brief hospital setting, anxiety (from rafe)

“rafe, wanna do chest to chest?” you hum, eyes mostly closed, the exhaustion from labor still affecting you.

“i…” he stares at you, and then at your son, resting against your chest, maternity dress pulled open so he's against your skin, his face resembling the exact same one rafe makes when he's sleeping. “its okay, you keep holding him.”

“okay.” you say, looking down at your son. it didn't take you long to decide on a name. leon andres cameron. leon after rafes grandfather and andres after your own. a good strong family name.

“he's so perfect.” rafe whispers, his voice cracking slightly.

“come closer.” you beckon, rafe moving his chair closer, but still keeping his distance, making you frown. “what's wrong?”

rafes mouth opens, but no words come out. you pause, hand petting over leons back.

“wait…” your mind starts to piece together, still foggy from the delivery and drugs. “you haven't held him yet.”

“i-” rafe stumbles over his words, knowing he's been caught. “i can't. he's too tiny. too perfect. i-i don't want to ruin him.”

“ruin him?” you frown. “rafe, you're his father. get over here.”

you struggle to scooch over on the hospital bed, but manage to make room for rafe to sit down next to you. he even sits carefully, gnawing at his lip as you turn leon over, keeping him asleep as you turn him face up, supporting his neck the whole time.

“just cradle your arms. it's okay, you'll get used to it.” you watch as rafe moves his arms before placing leon in them, having to cover your mouth when the sudden urge to cry hits you, leon looking even smaller being held by your husband.

“i love him.” rafe whispers, voice cracking, a few tears sliding down his cheeks. “i love him so much.”

“look how relaxed he is in your arms.” you coo. “i knew you'd be a good dad.”

“god, im so nervous.” rafe looks in the backseat where you’re sitting, leon buckled tight into the carseat.

“its okay.” you hum, leaning forward and pressing a kiss to his cheek. “just drive slow.” “yeah, of course.” rafe nods. he barely puts the car above 15 miles per hour the entire ride home. leon thankfully stays asleep, you’re not sure if you could have handled just leaving the hospital and having him crying on the way home.

“okay, here.” rafe takes a deep breath as he pulls the car into the garage.

“you got his carseat?” you ask. your body is still recovering from birth, and you’re not sure if you can lift anything up without tearing.

“yeah.” rafe undoes the carseat carefully as you get out and unlock the house, happy to be home after two days spent in the hospital.

“mmm.” you breathe in the fresh air. “my eyes are so happy after all that fluorescent light.”

“um- watch out baby.” rafe hates having to have you move out of the way so quickly, but he can hear leon beginning to fuss and needs to get him inside.

you giggle and step away, watching as rafe quickly rushes to unbuckle him. he looks to you to get him out of the carrier, but you allow rafe to scoop him up, shushing him and gently rocking him back and forth.

“i got it.” rafe offers.

“no, he's hungry.” you groan, already feeling your breasts swelling with milk just from hearing his cry. “i can tell.”

“im sorry, baby.” rafe sighs, staying in bed as he tries to get back to sleep. no point having both of you completely exhausted.

you manage to settle leon, feeding him in the rocking chair rafe got you before you gave birth. he almost wakes when you transfer him back to the crib, but you get him down and back to rafe, crawling into bed next to him.

“i wish i could do more.” rafe sighs. so much of you is required from leon, not just the pregnancy but now needing to feed him. rafe tries to take care of anything else you could need, but he struggles with not knowing how to do things as basic as changing diapers.

“you're learning fast, rafe. it's okay.” you move closer so rafe can hold you, snuggling into your back, his hand gently rubbing over your hip.

“i don't deserve you.” you know it's just the exhaustion talking. you grip his hand in yours, squeezing three times, saying the words without needing to speak.

“we should sleep while he's asleep.” you say, rafe nodding and pressing kisses to your shoulders and upper back until you're pulled back to sleep.

“shh, leon, it's okay.” rafe looks around for you, surely you must have heard leons cries. you said you'd be just a minute, running to the beauty aisle to grab your conditioner before returning to rafe shopping for groceries.

rafe pushes the brim of the carrier back, his heart breaking as his sons little face scrunches with big tears rolling down his cheeks.

rafe isn't sure what to do, so he just lets his instincts guide him as he quickly undoes the seatbelt and lifts leon into his chest, being careful to hold his head just as you instructed.

the second leon is against rafes, his cries lessen, and then all together subside as rafe bounces gently.

“is he okay?” rafe looks up to see you hustling down the aisle towards him.

“yeah, he was upset but i got him.” rafe pats leons back gently, turning his head to press a kiss against his cheek.

“okay.” you let out a sigh of relief, tossing your conditioner into the grocery cart. “want me to take him?”

“no, im good.” rafe shifts leon a little as you start to walk, pushing the carrier and loading the bottom up with more groceries, especially all the things you couldn't have while pregnant but are now safe despite still breastfeeding.

rafe doesn't miss the way you keep looking over at him with light in your eyes, excitement evident at seeing how comfortable rafe is becoming with leon held snuggly in his arms.

“are you sure?” you ask, frowning as your eyes flicker between leon laying on the couch cushion and rafe sitting next to him, focus on your baby as he makes silly faces at him.

“baby, i know i struggled at first, but this is one weekend. you have plenty of milk pumped. ill be fine.” rafe scoops leon into his arms as he stands, walking towards you.

“besides, if i need help i can always call your mom. even wheezie, you know she'll be happy to see leon.” rafe shifts the baby to one arm while his free hand comes to cup your cheek. “go. please, i will miss you and leon will too, but you deserve a break.”

“okay.” you nod, getting on your tip toes to press a kiss to rafes lips before also kissing leon, who lets out a familiar cooing sound.

“im gonna text my girls.” you can't hide the excitement in your voice, pulling out your phone to confirm you'll be able to go to the girls spa weekend away.

“i want nightly face times with you though baby.” you poke leons little nose, whose cheeks stretch into a smile.

“oh my god, rafe, is everything okay?” you squeal, squinting at the screen as if it'll somehow make leon appear.

“yes! fine, i promise.” rafe points the camera down so you can see leon happily on his lap, already looking tired as bedtime is quickly approaching.

“why didn't you pick up the first time?” you ask, a lot calmer now that you have eyes on your baby.

“leon and i were just getting home. i took him to the park. he couldn't really do anything but be in the carrier but he liked watching the other kids play.” rafe looks down at leon, giving him a little tickle under the chin. “isn't that right buddy?”

“did you-”

“yes, i put sunscreen on him. and he wore a hat. and-” rafe stresses before you can interrupt. “i reapplied sunscreen after an hour.”

“you're the best.” you smile. “you know i never doubted you rafe, it's just-” you take a deep sigh. “i worry so much about him. and making sure he's happy.”

“and he is.” rafe assured you. “look at his little face.”

you feel tears well up in your eyes as you look at your husband and your son, snuggled together on the couch. you quickly take a screenshot while they both have smiles on their faces.

“you're such a good mama. leons lucky to have you, and so am i.”

the tears are now falling down your cheeks as you smile. “i love you.”

“i love you too. and we miss you, but go enjoy your night with the girls!”

“okay.” you nod. “you're right. ill be home tomorrow around noon.”

“got it.” rafe holds the camera closer to leon. “say bye bye to mommy, leon.”

the call ends with his smiling face looking back at yours.

sfw taglist: @bejeweledreverie @winterrrnight @ladyinbl00d @ethanthequeefqueen

2K notes · View notes

dearlenore · 16 days ago

Note

Do you write smut? Or if not, lots of fluffy romance. I need a Tim Bradford x reader when Tim is thinking reader is cheating because she keeps staying out late but turns out she's been going to art classes because she wants to learn how to paint him

Hey love! Thanks the the request as always, I don’t write smut at the moment, don’t know if I ever will but I’m obsessed with the fluffy idea you gave me🥹❤️ so I for sure wrote that!!

CAUGHT RED HANDED • T.BRADFORD

SUMMARY: when you begin sneaking around secretly to receive painting lessons to paint your perfect boyfriend, he can’t help but grow suspicious…

PAIRING: fem!reader x tim bradford

tags: reader is a housewife, cheating suspicion, insecure bradford, fluff cutesy stuff

a/n: the grind never ends.

w/c: 1.2K

TIM BRADFORD WASN’T the jealous type. He prided himself on that. Years of being a cop, years of working in high-stakes situations where trust meant everything, had hardened him to unnecessary doubts. But this—this gnawing, irritating feeling in the pit of his stomach—was new. And he hated it.

He sat in his truck outside the café, watching through the windshield as you stood inside, laughing—glowing, really—while talking to someone he didn’t recognize. Some guy. Some guy he’d never seen before, who was clearly making you smile in the way that made his heart ache violently.

For the past few weeks, you’d been different. More secretive. Slipping out of bed early in the morning without a goodbye, Taking phone calls in hushed tones. Canceling date nights last minute with vague excuses. And now, this? Meeting up with someone behind his back? A man?

His fingers tightened around the steering wheel, feeling his knuckles go white at the intensity of his grip. He was probably overreacting. You weren’t the type to cheat. You loved him—God, he knew that. You were the sunshine to his storm, the one person who could make even his worst days bearable. He trusted you.

And yet…

He exhaled sharply, running a hand over his jaw before forcing himself to look away. This wasn’t him. He wasn’t some paranoid boyfriend stalking his girlfriend like a jealous idiot. He just needed answers. A conversation. That’s all. For all he knew , that could be your distant cousin!

So that’s what he told himself when you walked through the front door that night, smiling like nothing was wrong. Like you hadn’t just been somewhere he didn’t know, with someone he didn’t know.

“Hey, baby,” you greeted, dropping your bag by the couch before walking over to press a kiss to his cheek. “How was work?” You smiled warmly.

“Fine,” he said, barely managing to keep his voice steady. His eyes searched your face, looking for something—guilt, hesitation, anything—but all he found was warmth. That same sunshine that had pulled him in from the very start.

You hummed, running your hands up his arms, completely oblivious to the war raging inside him. “You’re tense. Long day?”

“Something like that,” he muttered, gently holding your waist. A beat passed, then—because he couldn’t help himself—he added, “Where were you?”

You blinked up at him, not surprised by maybe taken off guard. “What?”

“Tonight. You had plans.”

“Oh! Yeah, I—” You hesitated, just for a second, before forcing a bright smile. “Just out.” You laughed, shaking your head dismissively.

Just out.

Tim clenched his jaw, nodding slowly. “Right.”

That should’ve been the end of it. He should’ve let it go, let the doubt slip away like every other pointless worry. But instead, all he could hear was the way your voice wavered, just a little. The way you didn’t quite meet his eyes when you said it.

For the first time in his life, Tim Bradford didn’t know if he wanted to know the truth.

And so, for days, the tension had been building between you two. He wasn’t sure if you noticed it—if you felt the way he was pulling back, the way his usual warmth had been replaced with something quieter, something watchful. But how could you not? He wasn’t the type to pretend everything was fine when it wasn’t. And right now? Right now, nothing felt fine.

So tonight, he decided, was the night. No more wondering. No more doubts eating away at him. He was going to ask you outright.

When he got home, you were already there, curled up on the couch with your sketchbook in your lap. Your face lit up when you saw him, the same way it always did, and it made his chest ache.

“Hey, you’re home early!” you said, setting the sketchbook aside. “I was just about to—”

“Who is he?”

The words were out before he could stop them, blunt and heavy in the air between you.

You blinked, the smile slipping from your face. “What?”

Tim crossed the room, his eyes locked onto yours, searching for the truth. “The guy at the café. The one you’ve been sneaking off to see.”

Your mouth parted slightly, and for the first time in all the years he’d known you, you looked… nervous. Not guilty, but nervous.

“Tim…” you said softly, sitting up straighter. “It’s not what you think.” You bit back a smile, you knew he was stressed but something about the way he looked at you like Kojo when his bowl was taken away was too damn cute.

“Then tell me what it is,” he said, voice low, controlled. “Because for the past few weeks, you’ve been different. You leave early, you take calls in private, you cancel our plans last minute. And then I see you with some guy—” He let out a breath, shaking his head. “I trust you, but you’re not giving me much to work with here.”

You swallowed hard, pressing your lips together as you dropped your gaze. Your fingers twisted together in your lap, a telltale sign that you were nervous. And that only made his stomach tighten more.

“Come with me,” you said suddenly, standing up, not trying to hide your smile now.

Tim’s brows furrowed in confusion at your smile, but he followed as you led him down the hall to the spare room—the one you always kept locked. The one he had never questioned until now.

You hesitated for a second before pushing the door open, revealing a room filled with art supplies. Paint tubes scattered across a small desk, canvases stacked against the walls, brushes in jars—everywhere he looked, there were signs of creativity, of hours spent in quiet dedication.

And then, in the center of the room, stood a large canvas, half-covered with a cloth.

You walked over, fingers gripping the edge of the cloth tightly before glancing at him. “I was going to wait until it was finished, but…” You took a deep breath, then pulled the cloth away.

Tim stared.

It was him.

The painting—your painting—was of him. But not just any version of him. This was him as you saw him, not as a cop, not as a hardened, disciplined man, but as yours. The warm glow of sunlight painted across his face, the small crease between his brows that only appeared when he was deep in thought, the way his lips barely quirked at the corners, like he was on the edge of a smile. It was detailed, painfully detailed, and so full of love that it nearly knocked the breath from his lungs.

“I’ve been taking classes,” you said quietly. “I didn’t want to tell you until I got better, but I—I wanted to learn how to paint you. The way I see you.” You let out a nervous laugh, hugging yourself. “I asked my instructor for help, and that’s who you saw. The guy at the café. Who is very… very homosexual might I add.”

Tim didn’t speak. He couldn’t. His throat was too tight, his chest too full of something he couldn’t name.

You mistook his silence for something else.

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you,” you rushed out. “I swear I wasn’t trying to be shady, I just—I wanted it to be a surprise. I didn’t think— I know it’s not the best but it’s … it’s you..? I think—“ you laughed nervously, looking between the painting and him.

Before you could finish, he crossed the space between you in two long strides and pulled you into his arms. You gasped, hands gripping his shirt as he buried his face in your hair, holding you tighter than he had in weeks.

“Tim?” you murmured.

“I’m an idiot,” he muttered, voice rough with emotion.

You pulled back just enough to look at him, brows furrowed. “You’re not—”

“I thought—” He exhaled sharply, shaking his head at himself. “I thought you were pulling away. I thought I was losing you.”

Your expression softened instantly. “Baby…” You cupped his face, your thumb tracing over his jaw. “I’m so sorry.”

Tim let out a shaky breath, pressing his forehead to yours. “I should’ve just asked you. I should’ve trusted you.”

You smiled, tilting your head slightly. “Well, technically, you did ask me. Just, y’know, after stalking me to a café and jumping to conclusions.” You teased, faking a hurt expression.

His lips twitched. “I didn’t stalk you.”

You raised an eyebrow. “You sat in your truck and glared through the window, didn’t you?”

Tim groaned, closing his eyes. “Okay. Maybe a little.”

You laughed, the sound light and full of love, before wrapping your arms around his neck. “You’re an adorable idiot.”

“Yeah, yeah.” He sighed, squeezing your waist. “Laugh at grumpy cop, get it out now.” He chuckled. “So… you really spent weeks learning how to paint me?”

You beamed, nodding. “I wanted to capture you like a French girl,” you mused dramatically, holding out your hand to show off nothing in particular.

Despite the over usage of that joke in your relationship , something inside him melted at that. He didn’t know what he’d done to deserve you, but whatever it was, he wasn’t letting go.

Tim glanced at the painting again, then smirked. “So, when do I get to take it home?”

You gasped, playfully smacking his chest. “Excuse you, it’s not done.”

“Looks done to me.”

“Timothy Bradford, I swear—”

He cut you off with a kiss, one that was filled with every unspoken word, every ounce of love he had for you. And in that moment, with your laughter still lingering in the air and the painting standing as proof of how deeply you saw him, Tim knew one thing for sure:

He had never been so stupidly, hopelessly in love.

#the rookie #tim bradford #x reader #tim bradford x reader #fanfic #the rookie fluff #fluff #request

381 notes · View notes

dismalflo · 13 days ago

Note

poly!wolfstar with fem!reader in which Remus is embarrassed bc he needs a cane for the first time and starts overthinking that reader and Sirius are too good for him (typical Remus), but then Sirius and reader are very reassuring and prepare something to show Remus how much they love him?

Thank you for requesting! <3

poly!wolfstar x fem!reader who reassure remus when he's in pain ✩ 1.3k words

cw: established relationship, fluff, chronic pain, remus overthinking, light hurt/comfort

“What do you think? Blueberry or chocolate, Rem?” you ask.

But Remus hears it like he's submerged underwater. His mind focused on the shooting pain rising up his leg and into his hip. Suddenly, he feels rather pathetic. A simple trip to Tesco that's all it was but it's feeling more like hiking up a hill with uneven footing. The shifting of his weight has done little to alleviate the discomfort. Maybe he shouldn't have left the cane at home.

It's a new addition to his routine, a helpful one, but there's a gnawing doubt in his mind every time he uses it. Rationally, he knows that you and Sirius would never judge him for it, in fact you actively encourage it, however there's this devil sitting on his shoulder telling him he’s less than, not good enough for either of you when he uses it.

“Rem?” Your voice pierces through his haze, and he looks up to find you reaching out, a hand gently gripping his arm. You’re watching him closely, your eyebrows drawn in concern, lips pressed in a soft frown.

“Are you alright?”

Remus blinks, struggling to catch up with the reality of the moment. His gaze darts to the shelves ahead, the colorful boxes and sugary labels blending together in a blur as his focus slips. The pain in his hip spikes again, sharper now, making him shift uncomfortably on his feet.

“I… yeah, just tired,” he mutters, the words escaping before he can stop them. It’s easier than admitting the truth. The lie has become a shield, one he wishes he didn’t have to use, but he does.

You’ve come to learn that ‘tired’ really means ‘in pain,’ that Remus has perfected this little fiction over time. You frown, a mixture of concern and quiet understanding in your eyes. Remus can’t help but feel caught, sheepish under your gaze.

“Shall we go home?” you ask, your voice soft, but insistent.

“Home? We haven’t finished your list, doll.” Sirius’s voice cuts through the aisle, and Remus flinches at his sudden arrival. If you’ve noticed, Sirius surely will too.

You glance up to see Sirius standing a few feet away, the playful edge to his voice dampened by the concern in his eyes. He doesn’t miss a beat, though, the way his gaze flickers over to Remus, assessing him with a look that’s far too sharp for casual conversation. His brows furrow slightly, and the teasing grin he usually wears falls into something softer, more understanding.

“I know but we can get these now,” you gesture to the basket in your hand, “and get the rest another day.” You say softly.

Sirius nods enthusiastically, if you had to guess you’d say he’s just desperate to get Remus off his feet as you are. “Alright, give me the basket.” he says beckoning you over.

“Why?”

“Because pretty girls like you shouldn’t have to carry the shopping.”

“That’s a bit sexist,” you reply, teasing, which draws a low chuckle from Remus. You can’t help but smile at the sound—it’s like sunlight breaking through a cloudy sky.

Sirius sighs dramatically, shaking his head. “It’s chivalrous, babe.” His grin reappears, though it’s more playful than before. “And handsome men like you should be waited on hand and foot.”

The compliment makes Remus flush, and you link your arm with his as you start towards the door. He’s doing his best not to lean on you, but when your arm slips across his back, he can’t fight it any longer, allowing himself to rely on you just a little.

The drive back to the flat is quiet, but it’s the kind of comfortable silence that has grown between the three of you over time. The soft hum of the car’s engine, the gentle bump of the tires on the road, and the occasional glance exchanged between you and Sirius are all that fill the space, leaving Remus to rest his head against the window, eyes closed, but still awake.

When you arrive home, you’re the first to step out of the car. You wait, smiling gently at Sirius as he helps Remus out, making sure he’s steady on his feet. Remus looks a little less sure of himself when he stands up.

Once back in the flat, the front door clicking closed behind you, a collective sigh of relief fills the air. The warmth of home, the quiet refuge from the bustle of the outside world, settles over them like a comforting blanket.

Remus is the first to move, pushing himself off the wall he'd leaned against for support as he made his way through the door. But before he can get far, Sirius is there, just behind him, placing a gentle hand on his shoulder.

"Come on, Moony," Sirius murmurs, his voice soft but insistent.

Remus sighs, the exhaustion from the day pulling at him, but he doesn't resist. Instead, he turns his gaze toward you, who’s just a few steps behind them, already reaching for the cane that’s been abandoned in the hallway. You’re always so patient, always so understanding, and Remus feels both grateful and guilty for it. He doesn’t want to burden either of you.

“Don’t look at me like that,” you tease gently, flashing him a smile that’s warm but filled with that underlying concern that’s only for him. You approach, handing the cane to him with an encouraging nod. “Look, I’m not saying that you have to use it all the time… just– please, when you're in pain.” His theoretical pain as well as his actual pain seems to have an effect on you as you grimace.

“I know, yeah.” he mutters, but it’s more of a reflex than something he truly believes. He takes the cane from you, holding it in his hand but not quite using it yet. The weight of it feels heavier than it should.

Sirius notices the hesitation. His gaze softens, and without another word, he steps in front of Remus, blocking him from further retreat.

“Rem,” Sirius says, his tone not commanding but affectionate, “you’re not less than. Not to us. Not ever. You’ve got to let us help, okay?”

Remus looks at him, and for a moment, it’s like he sees something deeper in Sirius’s eyes. That same understanding you both share, that unspoken promise of support, no matter what. It makes the knot in his chest loosen ever so slightly.

Before he can say anything, you’re at his side, your arm slipping around his waist, a comforting weight that reminds him he’s not alone.

“You know we don’t mind, right?” you whisper against his ear, your voice warm with reassurance. “We love you, Remus. I love you.”

Remus swallows, the weight of their words settling in his chest like a soft, warming glow.

“Thank you.”

Sirius steps closer, his hand finding Remus’s, giving it a gentle squeeze. "You don't need to thank us," he says with a soft smile, his voice full of affection. "We’re in this together, always."

Remus feels the warmth of their care radiating through him, the love that’s become a steady presence in his life. He’s overwhelmed, and for the first time in a while, he feels like he can breathe.

“I don’t know what I’d do without you two,” he murmurs, the words barely escaping his lips.

You press a kiss to his cheek, soft and lingering, before pulling back just enough to look into his eyes. "Good thing you’ll never have to find out," you say, voice teasing but filled with sincerity.

Sirius, always quick to follow your lead, leans in to place a kiss on Remus’s other cheek, then a chaste one to his lips. "You’re stuck with us."

#flo'sfics #marauders au #marauders fics #marauders era #marauders fanfiction #poly!wolfstar x reader #poly!wolfstar x y/n #poly!wolfstar x you #poly!wolfstar x fem!reader #poly!wolfstar #poly!wolfstar drabble #poly!wolfstar fic #poly!wolfstar fanfiction #poly!wolfstar fluff #remus lupin x reader #sirius black x reader #remus lupin #sirius black

351 notes · View notes

woso-dreamzzz · 3 months ago

Text

Kidnapped III

Fridolina Rolfö x Baby!Reader

Summary: Your first steps

Your first steps come like most of your firsts do.

In Frido's home in Barcelona.

She'd (yet again) managed to convince your parents that it was okay to leave you in her care while they went out exploring the city for a spot to have dinner during date night.

"Alright, you," Frido says in mock seriousness, standing you up against her sofa," Let's get you walking."

You've been crawling for a little while now - also something that first happened at your big sister's house - but you've also been learning how to pull yourself up.

"Just a few little steps," Frido continues as she backs away to the wall opposite you," Come on, älskling. Come on."

You look at her blankly for a moment, stable with your hands on the soft fabric of the sofa.

Frido wiggles her outstretched fingers at you. "Come on, älskling. Just a little? I'm not very far."

"Bah!" You babble, a little finger pointed her way before you amuse yourself with picking at the threads of the blanket thrown haphazardly on the sofa.

Frido rolls her eyes. "Yes, yes, bah! But don't you want to walk to me? Look! I've got Teddy!"

She wiggles your Teddy rattle at you and you perk up at the sound of the noise.

"That's it! Come to Teddy!"

You reach out for him though, still rooted to the spot and Frido sighs.

"How did you get your Cub to walk?" She asks five minutes later, grossly impatient enough to call Mapi for advice.

"Er...She just kind of did it? She was chasing Bagheera."

"Well that's unhelpful!"

"Maybe get her a cat?"

"I don't have time to get her to bond with a cat enough for her to chase it."

"Maybe," Frido hears Ingrid yell from wherever she is in her and Mapi's apartment," If you stopped picking her up all the time she'd actually start walking! You spoil her!"

"It's not spoiling if it makes her happy!"

Frido ends the call, looking over at where you've somehow pulled yourself up onto the sofa and is now fiddling with the remote.

"You can't walk but you know how to climb?" Frido bemoans," This is so unfair."

She flops onto the seat next to you, pulling you into her lap. "You're going to walk before you go home," She says," You're not leaving otherwise."

You giggle, kicking your feet happily as Frido gently tickles the sole of your socked feet.

"And once you've started walking, we can work on those football skills."

You grunt a little bit, batting Frido's hands away when you spot your Teddy rattle on the floor.

She lowers you to the ground when you keep pushing her.

"Yeah, yeah," She laughs," Teddy's more important. I get it. Go and army crawl over there to him."

You grunt at Frido again and, like you're just trying to spite her, you put one foot in front of the other and kind of wobbly shuffle over to Teddy, shaking him so he rattles about.

"Te-Te!" You giggle excitedly, shaking him a bit more aggressively and looking at Frido as if you're presenting him to her.

"That's right. That's Teddy!" Frido laughs," And you're walking! Look at you!"

By the time your parents return home, Frido's got a little goal set up in the hall and you sitting in front of a ball.

"No, älskling!" She groans, lifting you up onto your feet again," You kick it. Remember?

You screech at her, sitting back down again and grabbing the ball with your hands.

"No," Frido says," With your feet. Like I do."

"Frido, what are you doing?" Your Papa asks, brow raised as you start gnawing on the little ball.

"She started walking!" Frido replies quickly," I reckon we can train her up now, maybe get her in a few five-a-sides and-"

"I don't think they do five-a-sides for babies."

"Later then," She says dismissively," I'll get her on the pitch at some point. Once she, you know, learns to kick and not-"

You toddle on very shaky legs to the little goal Frido set up and throw your ball into it.

Mama picks you up, throwing you up and down happily. "Goal!" She cheers," I think we've got a little handball star in the making!"

"No," Frido insists," She'll play football. Won't you, älskling? Another football player in the family?"

"Bah!" You grunt, wild little limbs hitting Frido straight in the nose as she recoils.

"I think y/n's made her choice," Papa laughs, clapping Frido on the back.

"No!" Frido says with a laugh," I refuse to accept it! That girl will be out on a football pitch before you know it!"

In the end, all of your handball medals hang up next to Frido's football ones in your parent's house.

#woso x reader #fridolina rolfö x reader #fridolina rolfö #woso community #woso imagine #woso fanfics #woso

551 notes · View notes

thedensworld · 5 months ago

Text

Born Superhero | J.Ww

Genre: fluff, parent au!

Summary: Started as clueless father to superhero, watch how Wonwoo grow as a father... And a husband.

The pregnancy wasn’t an accident; it was simply... A little unexpected. Okay, very unexpected. You and Wonwoo had been married for only six months—still in the honeymoon phase, barely used to sharing closet space—when life threw you both a curveball.

Wonwoo was overseas on a business trip when he got the alarming call that you had passed out at work. The reassurances from friends didn’t help; his mind raced with every possibility, from exhaustion to something far worse. Before he knew it, he was on the earliest flight back, heart thudding as if it were trying to make its way home ahead of him.

When he finally walked through the door, ready to scold you for pushing yourself too hard, he was met with news that rendered him speechless: you were pregnant. He’d always imagined having kids... someday. But not when he was still trying to remember which side of the bed was "his."

His lips curled into a smile, the kind meant to comfort you as you nervously searched his face for a reaction. But inside? Oh, inside he was trembling so hard he half-expected an earthquake warning to pop up on the TV. Fatherhood. He was going to be a dad. The idea was thrilling, terrifying, and somehow as surreal as finding socks in the fridge.

"Well," he said, pulling you into his arms and trying not to sound like a man whose life just did a triple somersault, "I guess this explains why you kept craving pickles and ice cream together."

Wonwoo made it his mission to be your unwavering support system, even when a storm brewed behind his calm eyes. He bottled up the anxiety gnawing at him—the nagging questions about whether he’d be a good father, if he could handle the responsibility, or if he would ever stop feeling like a deer caught in the headlights of parenthood. He couldn’t bear the thought of adding his fears to your plate when you were already dealing with morning sickness that had you running to the bathroom at all hours, leg cramps that turned simple walks into wobbly adventures, and sleepless nights that left you both bleary-eyed.

So, he channeled every ounce of that anxious energy into action. He worked harder than ever, managing late nights and early mornings, making sure everything you could possibly need was taken care of—from prenatal vitamins to setting up the nursery with the precision of a man assembling a palace. Wonwoo learned to cook your favorite comfort meals, and when you suddenly decided the smell of his go-to cologne made you queasy, he switched brands without a word of complaint. He’d hold your hand through doctor appointments, his smile steady even as the “dad” word hovered in his mind like a flashing neon sign.

And when the big day came, Wonwoo felt time stop as he watched you, the love of his life, bring a new one into the world. All the fear, the endless late-night overthinking—it all melted away the moment he laid eyes on Jeon Rayi. The boy had his eyes, the same quiet intensity, and as he let out his first tiny wail, Wonwoo realized something: he was already a father, whether he felt ready or not.

As you cradled Rayi, exhausted but beaming, Wonwoo gently took his son into his arms. The weight was different than he expected, lighter but powerful, grounding him in a way he didn’t know he needed.

“Look at him,” you whispered, teary-eyed and smiling. “He’s your little twin.”

Wonwoo’s chest swelled with emotion as he looked down at Rayi, whose eyes were now blinking up at him as if to say, Gotcha, Dad.

One thing Wonwoo couldn’t quite shake from his mind was the moment before he first laid eyes on Rayi—the moment when you, exhausted and trembling, brought him into the world. He'd watched enough viral videos of husbands fainting in the delivery room to think he was prepared for anything. I’ll be fine, he’d told himself. But when it actually happened, when he saw you gripping the sides of the bed, your face etched with pain so raw it made his chest tighten, his whole body turned to stone. He couldn’t move, couldn’t breathe, only stare wide-eyed as you endured each wave of agony.

Seeing you in pain, your body shaking as the delivery was finally declared successful, felt like a blow that rattled every nerve he had. All he wanted was to wrap you in his arms, to kiss away every tear and tell you a thousand times over how much he loved you. But he stood there, stunned and aching, until the first tiny cry of Rayi snapped him back to reality.

When the nurse placed Rayi in your arms, a hush fell over the room, broken only by your relieved sobs and the baby's soft whimpers. Wonwoo’s eyes misted as he took in the sight of you holding their son—this tiny, perfect reflection of him. The joy that filled him was almost overwhelming, a light so bright it nearly erased the memory of everything that had come before.

But later, when the room had quieted and it was just the three of you, Wonwoo sat by your side, gently brushing the hair from your damp forehead. His gaze flicked between you and Rayi, and a pained shadow passed over his eyes.

“Seeing you trembling after giving birth,” he whispered, voice hoarse and unsteady, “I don’t think we need more children. I can’t... I don’t want to see you in pain like that again.”

You looked up at him, exhaustion softening your features as you managed a small, tired smile. “Wonwoo, we’ll be okay. This little one is worth it,” you said, touching Rayi’s tiny fist as it clung to your finger.

He nodded, though the worry didn’t fully leave his expression. Deep inside, he knew you were right. Rayi was worth it. But the memory of your pain would be seared into his heart, a reminder of just how fiercely he loved you, and how deeply it shook him to see you hurt.

Wonwoo's journey as a first-time dad was filled with more surprises than he could have anticipated. In the first few weeks, he was as nervous as he had been the day Rayi was born, startled awake by every whimper and uncertain about every diaper change. He was meticulous to the point of being comical, triple-checking the swaddle and peeking into the crib every half hour to make sure Rayi was still breathing.

But as the months rolled on, something remarkable happened: Wonwoo began to relax into fatherhood. The once-trembling hands that struggled to button up tiny onesies became adept at cradling Rayi while half-asleep. He learned the art of the midnight bottle, perfecting a one-handed technique so he could hold Rayi close while warming up formula with the other. The exhaustion was bone-deep, but the sight of Rayi’s gummy smile each morning made every sleepless night worth it.

The two of you grew together as parents, finding comfort in the shared laughter and the quiet chaos of raising a newborn. Wonwoo discovered a new side of himself—one that sang silly songs at 3 a.m. just to keep Rayi from crying, that narrated mundane chores with animated voices as though he were performing on stage. His once measured, serious tone became playful and warm, especially when Rayi would respond with delighted giggles that made his heart swell.

There were moments of doubt, of course. Nights when Rayi was teething and inconsolable, when nothing seemed to work, and Wonwoo would feel the weight of his inadequacies creeping in. During those times, he’d find you both leaning on each other, whispering words of encouragement, your hands clasped in a silent promise that you were in this together. You’d remind him that parenting was messy, imperfect, and filled with trial and error, but that Rayi didn’t need perfection—he just needed love.

As Rayi grew from a newborn into a babbling infant, Wonwoo learned to celebrate the small milestones: the first time Rayi rolled over, the first tooth that peeked through his gums, and the first unsteady steps that had Wonwoo following close behind with arms outstretched, ready to catch him. Each new achievement was a moment of triumph not just for Rayi, but for Wonwoo too. Every smile, every laugh, every moment they shared felt like a victory, a reassurance that he was doing okay, that they were doing okay.

One evening, as the golden light of sunset streamed through the living room, Rayi toddled over with a wobbling gait, his chubby hands reaching out for his father. Wonwoo scooped him up, lifting him into the air and watching as Rayi squealed with joy. For a moment, all his early worries about fatherhood seemed like a distant memory. He met your eyes across the room, sharing a smile that spoke volumes about how far you’d both come.

“We did pretty well, didn’t we?” he said, more to himself, as Rayi wrapped his tiny arms around his neck in a triumphant hug.

“Yes, we did,” you replied, coming over to place a gentle hand on Wonwoo’s shoulder, leaning in to kiss Rayi’s soft cheek.

In that moment, as Rayi laughed between the two of you, Wonwoo knew that whatever challenges lay ahead, he was ready to face them—not alone, but with you and your little family, growing stronger and more full of love each day.

Wonwoo was out of the city for a schedule when his manager hurried toward him, phone in hand, urgency written all over his face. Wonwoo’s chest tightened. It had to be you calling. That was the compromise you both had made—only call when it was urgent. The same rule applied when he was home alone with Rayi, and you were out. If it could be handled without a call, texting was the way. But this was different. His manager wouldn’t rush over for a casual update.

“Y/N…” his manager muttered, handing him the phone. Wonwoo grabbed it immediately, putting it to his ear, his heart pounding.

“What’s wrong?” he asked, worry evident in his voice. He strained to hear past the slight static on the line, but then it hit him—Rayi’s cries, loud and unrelenting in the background.

“Rayi has a fever,” you said, your voice edged with panic. “He’s been crying nonstop for the past hour. I’m on my way to the hospital.”

Wonwoo’s breath hitched. Rayi was rarely sick. The thought of his son, usually so bright and energetic, being unwell made his stomach twist. “Where are you taking him?” he asked, biting his lip to steady his voice.

“Seoul University Hospital,” you replied, and he could hear the tremble in your voice, paired with Rayi’s cries from the backseat. “I couldn’t think of anywhere else...”

“You’re doing a great job,” Wonwoo interrupted gently, his tone firm and reassuring. “I’ll figure out how to leave early. Please, update me when you get there?”

You hummed in acknowledgment, your breaths uneven. “I will.”

“And drive safely,” he added, his voice softening despite the whirlwind of emotions swirling inside him.

The moment the call ended, Wonwoo sprang into action, explaining the situation to the managers and the members. The moment he mentioned Rayi’s fever, everyone rallied around him with understanding and support, urging him to leave immediately.

His manager didn’t waste a second, getting him into the car for the drive back to Seoul. On the way, Wonwoo stared out the window, fists clenched on his lap, running over every scenario in his head. You had mentioned in a text last night that Rayi was feeling warm, but neither of you had expected it to escalate this quickly.

Wonwoo stepped into the hospital, his pace bordering on a run. He hadn’t had time to change out of his work clothes, though he silently thanked his manager for packing a change of clothes in the car. Right now, none of that mattered. His only focus was reaching you and Rayi.

When he got to the room, his breath hitched. The sight of Rayi, lying pale and fragile in your arms with his tiny arm connected to an IV, shattered him. It was a stark contrast to the lively boy who usually filled the house with laughter. His heart broke into pieces.

“He just fell asleep,” you mouthed softly, careful not to disturb Rayi’s slumber.

Wonwoo nodded and immediately moved to sit beside you. His eyes stayed glued to his son as you gently laid Rayi down on the hospital bed, brushing a stray curl from his forehead before stepping away.

Without a word, Wonwoo stood and pulled you into his arms. His embrace was tight, as though holding you close could somehow erase the weight of the day. “I’m sorry I wasn’t here sooner,” he whispered, his voice thick with guilt.

“Thank you for coming,” you murmured back, leaning into him.

He pulled back slightly, his hands resting on your shoulders as his eyes searched yours. He noticed the weariness etched into your features—the sleepless night, the worry, the stress of handling it all alone until he arrived. “How is he now?” he asked gently.

You let out a deep sigh. “The doctor said it’s likely a virus. They’re monitoring him, but his fever has come down.”

Relief flashed across Wonwoo’s face, though the worry in his eyes remained. He nodded, then pulled you into another hug, this one softer, his lips brushing against your hair. “You’re doing such an amazing job, love. Thank you for taking care of him.”

You smiled faintly against his chest, grateful for his words, even though the exhaustion still weighed heavily on you.

“You should rest now,” Wonwoo said, pulling back to look at you again. “I’ll stay with him and take care of everything tonight. You need sleep.”

But you shook your head, stubborn as always. “No, I can’t. I need to be here.”

Wonwoo sighed, but he didn’t push further. He knew better than to argue when you were this determined. Instead, he brought over a chair and sat beside you. That night, the two of you stayed awake together, taking turns checking Rayi’s temperature and watching his small chest rise and fall with each steady breath.

Every so often, Wonwoo would glance at you, catching the way your gaze softened as you looked at Rayi. In those moments, despite the exhaustion and worry, he felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude—for you, for Rayi, for the family you’d built together.

By the time the early morning light began creeping through the hospital curtains, you leaned your head against his shoulder, both of you too tired to talk but sharing an unspoken bond of love and determination. Whatever challenges lay ahead, you knew you’d face them together.

The hospital room was quiet except for the soft hum of medical equipment. After two long days of watching over Rayi, exhaustion had overtaken you and Wonwoo. Neither of you had gone home since that night, surviving on restless naps on the small couch by Rayi's bedside. Wonwoo tried to stay alert, but his body betrayed him, slipping into moments of sleep. Every time he woke, guilt would gnaw at him as he saw you still wide awake, your eyes fixed on Rayi, your motherly instinct unwilling to rest.

That morning, as sunlight filtered through the window, Wonwoo stirred and glanced at you. You were slowly getting up from the couch, your movements unsteady. He sat up quickly, alarmed as you swayed slightly, your hand gripping the armrest for support.

“Babe, are you okay?” he asked, his voice laced with concern. He moved to your side just as you nearly stumbled. Placing a hand on your forehead, his expression darkened. “You’re burning up. I think you have a fever.”

“Oh no,” you muttered under your breath, more annoyed with yourself than anything.

Wonwoo's hands gently cupped your face, tilting your head up to meet his gaze. “Please rest, babe. You’ve been running on fumes, and Rayi wouldn’t want to see his mom pushing herself too hard.” His voice was soft but firm, and the concern in his eyes made your chest tighten.

You blinked rapidly, trying to hold back tears. His words hit too close to home, but you didn’t want to break down. Not now.

Unfortunately, your body didn’t give you much choice. By midday, your fever had worsened, leaving Wonwoo no option but to call his brother to watch over Rayi while he took you to the emergency room.

“I’m sorry,” you mumbled weakly as you laid on the hospital bed, waiting for the test result.

“No,” Wonwoo said, shaking his head, his tone gentle but resolute. “I’m sorry. You’re sick because you’ve been taking care of Rayi and pushing yourself beyond your limit. I should’ve been better at taking care of you too.” He reached out, softly patting your head in an attempt to comfort you.

Your head throbbed, and the dizziness didn’t help. You couldn’t help but think about Rayi and how frustrating it must have been for him to endure the same symptoms. “This headache... I think I know why Rayi was so upset,” you murmured faintly, earning a sad chuckle from Wonwoo.

“Still hurts?” he asked, his hand tightening around yours. You nodded weakly, and his expression crumbled. He hated feeling helpless, but right now, all he could do was stay by your side, offering silent support.

When the test results finally came back, the doctor informed you that you were dehydrated and your body was too run-down to fight off the fever. “We’ll need to keep you for observation,” the doctor said.

Wonwoo nodded, his grip on your hand steady. “Do whatever it takes to make her better,” he said, his voice quiet but firm.

As the nurses prepared for your moving, he turned to you, brushing hair away from your face. “You’re going to rest now, okay? No arguments,” he whispered with a small, tired smile.

After hours of shuffling between emergency room and paperwork, Wonwoo finally managed to arrange for you and Rayi to share a private room. It was ironic, he thought, as he pushed the wheelchair carrying you to the room—both his loves were now patients, and he was playing the role of a full-time caregiver.

Rayi lay in his hospital bed, still hooked up to the IV, his tiny frame looking so much better than days ago under the blue blanket. You were wheeled to the second bed beside him, visibly exhausted but trying to stay strong.

Wonwoo helped you settle in, adjusting your pillow and tucking the blanket around you like you always did for Rayi. “There. Now I have both of you in my sight,” he said softly, sitting down between your beds with a sigh of relief.

You gave him a weak smile. “Not how I imagined our first family staycation.”

Wonwoo chuckled, though there was a hint of tiredness in his voice. “Yeah, I don’t think this is making it to our family scrapbook.” He reached out, holding your hand in one of his while keeping the other near Rayi’s bedside.

The days that followed were a blur of tending to both of you. Wonwoo quickly fell into a rhythm—feeding Rayi when he woke up crying, gently wiping your face with a cool cloth to keep your fever down, and running back and forth to fetch food or talk to doctors.

At one point, as you watched him juggling everything, you couldn’t help but smile. “You’re really something, Jeon Wonwoo. I didn’t think you had it in you to manage two patients.”

He looked at you, his glasses slipping slightly down his nose as he smiled back. “Turns out I’m pretty good at this dad-and-husband thing. But don’t get any ideas about a repeat performance.”

“Noted,” you said, laughing softly.

Rayi started to recover quickly, his fever subsiding by the second day. You could see him regaining his usual cheerfulness, even managing to giggle when Wonwoo made silly faces. But that didn’t stop Wonwoo from being extra cautious, checking on both of you every few minutes.

One evening, when Rayi was sound asleep, you watched Wonwoo nodding off in the chair between the two of you, his head tilted awkwardly. “Wonwoo,” you whispered, shaking his hand gently.

“Hm?” He jolted awake, rubbing his eyes and looking around.

“Go to the couch and sleep,” you said softly.

He shook his head. “I’m fine here. What if one of you needs me?”

You smiled, your heart swelling with gratitude. “We’re okay, Wonwoo. You’ve done so much already. Please rest.”

Reluctantly, he agreed, dragging himself to the small couch in the corner. As he lay there, his head resting on a folded jacket, he thought about how much this experience had changed him. He wasn’t just a husband or a dad anymore—he was part of a team, a family that needed him, and he wouldn’t trade that for anything in the world.

As you drifted off to sleep, with Rayi’s soft breathing filling the room, you glanced at Wonwoo one last time. Despite his exhaustion, there was a peaceful smile on his face, and you knew that in his quiet, unwavering way, he would always take care of both of you.

After six long days at the hospital, the "family staycation" was finally over. Wonwoo drove the three of you home, the car filled with a comfortable silence, broken only by Rayi's babbles from the backseat. The little boy had been released two days earlier, and during that time, Wonwoo had asked his parents to take care of him so you could recover without any distractions. Now, as the car pulled into the driveway, Rayi was buzzing with excitement to be home again—and to be with you.

The moment you stepped inside, Rayi nearly leaped into Wonwoo's arms, squealing with delight. “He really missed us,” Wonwoo said, his voice soft with affection.

“I think he missed the house more,” you teased as Rayi wiggled to be put down. The instant his feet touched the floor, he zoomed off on his walker, embarking on a grand tour of the house.

Wonwoo chuckled as he picked up the bags, watching Rayi disappear into the kitchen. “Guess he’s making sure everything’s still here.”

Meanwhile, you sank into the couch with a relieved sigh. Days of lying in a hospital bed had made you sluggish, and even standing for more than a few minutes felt like an Olympic feat. As much as you wanted to jump back into your routine, your body begged for more rest.

Wonwoo joined you on the couch, plopping down beside you with a contented groan. Together, you watched Rayi race around, his walker creating an amusing squeak with every step as he stopped to admire his favorite show playing on the TV.

“You know what…” Wonwoo said suddenly, his voice thoughtful.

“Hm?” you hummed, turning to him.

“The most cliché thing that would happen now is me falling sick,” he joked, leaning his head back and closing his eyes as though imagining the scenario.

You laughed softly, shaking your head. “You? No way. You’re strong. You won’t get sick.”

He nodded, pretending to agree, but the twinkle in his eye betrayed his skepticism. “Let’s hope you’re right,” he said with a grin.

But hope wasn’t enough.

A few days later, the doorbell rang, and you were greeted by a pile of fruit baskets and home-cooked meals from Wonwoo’s bandmates. Word had gotten out that Wonwoo had come down with a fever and couldn’t make it to the schedule.

You peeked into the living room where Wonwoo lay sprawled out on the couch, bundled in a blanket with a thermometer sticking out of his mouth. He groaned dramatically when he saw you holding the care packages.

“I told you it was going to happen,” he mumbled, his voice muffled by the blanket.

You stifled a laugh as you set the baskets down. “Guess you’re not as strong as I thought.”

“Hey, I fought off a virus and took care of two patients for a week,” he said, sitting up slightly to defend himself. “I deserve some slack.”

“You do,” you agreed, leaning down to kiss his forehead. “Now let me take care of you for a change.”

From the corner, Rayi giggled, pointing at his dad bundled up like a burrito. “Appa funny!” he chirped, and you couldn’t help but laugh along.

Despite his fever, Wonwoo smiled. Even in his weakened state, he knew moments like these were what made being a parent and a husband so worth it.

715 notes · View notes

inkbybambi · 2 years ago

Text

bodyguard!simon riley who takes a bullet for you —

words: 2.9k rating: e warnings: nightmares, guns/shooting, gunshot wound, hospitals, smut, creampie, cunnilingus, mentions of threats against reader, threat against reader, lowercase writing — please let me know if i missed any! notes: 18+ content, minors dni. warnings have been provided.

He's been assigned to you for two-ish years now. You weren't thrilled at first, and neither was he — but he didn't make it as obvious as you did.

"I don't need a babysitter," you had damn-near hissed when he was introduced.

"I wasn't hired to be one," he counters coolly, which only serves to irritate you further.

Actively ignoring his presence — as much as you could when your company moved him into your apartment — even though you begrudgingly made room in the counters and fridge for his things, even going as far as investing into a better kettle so he could make his tea and clearing out an entire cabinet for all his tea, sugar, and steeper.

He trails you quietly as he was hired to; keeping close enough to always have you in his sights but far enough away that people wouldn't be able to clock his association to you — or so he thought.

Six months into his contract with you — an unknown amount of time left, as Price never answered and soon he stopped asking — he wakes in the middle of the night from a scream he never thought would come from you.

He rushes to your bedroom, gun in hand with his finger resting on the side — not the trigger. The front door is locked as he had left it, windows unbroken. He almost thinks he might've associated it with one of his own nightmares, until he sees you.

Curled in on yourself, face tucked into your knees, fingers threaded at the nape of your neck as you struggle to breathe properly, hiccups and sobs breaking between your stuttered breaths.

He knocks gently on your door, not wanting to startle you. You jump a little, regardless, but lift your head to look at him.

"'m sorry," you mumble, voice rough, "I didn't mean to wake you."

And you hadn't. You thought you were done with these awful nightmares, the ones gnawing at the edges of your mind during the day.

"'S'alright," he replies, tucking the gun into the waistband of his sleep shorts, walking carefully towards your bed. "You okay?"

The look he receives damn near breaks his heart.

He learns, that night, that an attempt had been made on your life before. More than once.

They never got close enough to do any harm, you say, but then swallow thickly and clutch your bicep where Simon sees a scar that he never took notice of previously. They didn't get close enough to do anything worse, you amend, chancing a look at him.

"I had security then, too," you explain, wiping your tears with your hand, playing with the blanket. "It didn't change anything."

Something shifts after that.

He starts cooking for you — with you, when there's time — and you bring him a cup of tea each morning. The bookshelf in the living room, previously only half-filled, collects Simon's books. You give him the login to all your streaming services, and ignore the pointed look he gives you when he sees some trashy reality tv show in your continue to watch queue.

He doesn't complain much when he stands behind you during an episode, arms crossed, asking a question here and there. You sigh, exasperated at having to explain everything, telling him to sit down as you start the series from the beginning.

Nine months into his contract, your nightmares become more frequent, and worse. You don't understand why. You were getting better, you cry in Simon's arms after a particularly rough night.

"Sometimes these things happen," he tells you softly, gently petting your hair, tucking you under his chin.

"Make them stop, please," you beg, even though you know he can't. he wishes he could.

He starts sleeping in your bed.

He's so warm, your cheek pressed into his chest, feeling more secure than you have in months when the weight of his thick, tattooed arm slings around your waist. He presses a kiss to your forehead at night, and you burrow into his side.

He starts taking the balaclava off at night.

A morning where you blessedly don't have to be up early, grey clouds hang in the sky, the promise of a storm later.

"G'mornin'," he says, voice rough with sleep, feeling him flex and stretch beneath you, groaning as his body relaxes. A flash of heat snaps through you.

"Morning," you reply, only half-awake, tilting your head up to drag your lips across his jaw, prickling with stubble.

He cradles the back of your head, fingers thick and comforting, tilting you back until his mouth slants over yours. He holds you so carefully, like glass, as his tongue slips into your mouth, hot and heavy.

The sheets rustle as he moves to lay over you, free arm resting by your head as your legs hook on his hips, trying to draw him closer to you.

He nips at your bottom lip as he rolls his hips, the heat of his cock through his boxers frazzling your brain. You mewl, his tongue back in your mouth, moving his hand to grip your waist and drag you up against him, moaning low in his throat when he feels the wetness seeping through your panties.

"Fuck," you breathe out as his mouth moves over your cheek, down your jaw, kissing the sensitive skin behind your ear.

"Say please," he rumbles.

"Simon, please," you whine, fingers curling at the base of his skull and scratching, and he snarls against your skin, sinking his teeth into the side of your neck as he tears your panties off, pushing his boxers down enough to free his cock.

You're so wet for him, slick coating your thighs as he drags his cock through your folds.

He usually takes his time — using his fingers and tongue to open them up first, wanting to feel the wet heat of their cunt and the spurt of their release to know they're relaxed and ready for him. He eats pussy like he'll die if he doesn't, will happily spend hours between your legs if you let him.

But with you? He feels feral with need.

"It's big, sweet thing," he rasps into your skin, lips hovering over that sensitive spot on your neck that he sunk his teeth into earlier, notching the head of his cock at your entrance. He's not trying to brag, it's just a fact.

You claw at him, the sting of open scratches burning his skin so pleasantly.

"It's okay, don't care," you pant, gripping him hard enough to leave deep crescent marks in his skin, angling your hips up to draw him into your cunt yourself.

He grips your hips with both hands, slowly pushing his thick length into you, nails digging even deeper the more he pushes in.

"Feels so fucking good," he says, tongue laving over your throat to collect the thin sheen of sweat that coats your skin. "Could fuck you forever," he groans, your breath hitching.

You make a strangled noise low in your throat. It's been awhile since you've fucked anyone, and you've never fucked anyone as big as him before.

The stretch feels so good, though. Your cunt clenches around him as he sinks in deeper, mind glazing over as you focus only on him.

"Fuck," he whines when he finally seats himself fully into you, nuzzling into your neck, overwhelmed by the heat and slick, "good fucking girl, taking me so well."

He swallows thickly, waiting a couple heartbeats to enjoy this — it's been awhile for him, too.

"Think you can take it, love?" and his fucking voice. You would agree to do anything as long as you could hear that rough accent along your throat, teeth skimming your skin.

"Yes," you breathe out harshly, moving to wrap your arms around his shoulders, needing him close, close, closer.

For a man of few words, Simon has a filthy mouth as he fucks into you, accompanied by groans and growls into your collar.

"Never had a cunt this perfect." "Fuckin' made for me." "Can't wait to get my tongue in you, feel you cum on my face." "No one else can have you." "You're mine."

And you, normally far more verbal than him, are reduced to nothing more than mewls and pleas and moans for more.

You mouth and nip at his jaw when you can, wanting to mark him, wanting to stake your claim. You'll be his forever if he lets you, but you'll be damned if anyone else gets to have him either.

"Simon — " is the only warning you give before you cum on his cock, head thrown back as you moan through the waves of pleasure, release coating his length and thighs.

"That's it, baby, good girl, give it to me," he says, blunt nails digging into your waist as he grinds himself deep into you. You feel so warm and pliant, the pleasure numbing your mind as he rocks himself into you.

"Wanna feel you give me one more, angel," he bites at your throat on the other side, his need to sink his teeth into every inch of your skin overwhelming. He hooks your legs over his shoulders, fucking into you deeper, hitting that spot inside you that has you seeing stars and your toes curling.

You grip at him again, clawing as he fucks into you, the sound of your wet cunt taking each thrust creating a symphony with his groans and your cries. He feels so fucking good, splitting you open and making you whole, desperate for him to cum inside.

The way your nails dig into his shoulder is the sign that you're getting close, and he thrusts just a little harder, a little meaner, your cute whines growing more desperate as you walk the precipice of another orgasm.

No one's ever made you cum more than once — sometimes, not even once — and you've never been able to do it yourself either.

Simon? Fucks a second orgasm out of you like it's his life mission, ankles tightening around his neck as pleasure lines your veins, shaking as he continues to hit that spot inside you as you cum, prolonging it as much as he can.

"Baby — " he chokes out, sharp teeth on your shoulder, thrusts getting sloppy. The slick of your two releases sounds so loud in your bedroom, feeling the desperation as he thrusts, deeper, harder.

"Cum inside," you mumble against his cheek, nails scratching at the base of his skull as he thrusts once, twice, three times — the warmth of his release flooding your cunt.

He fists the sheets in one hand, nails dragging down your thigh as he pumps deep into you, your slick and his release seeping out of your hole, dripping down his balls and your asshole.

You stay like that, lips brushing, breathing in each other's air as you slowly come down from the high.

Simon gently — so gently — lowers your legs, carefully watching your face for any signs of discomfort, settling them on his hips, hands moving up and down your thighs. "Y'alright?" he asks. You swallow thickly and nod, both hands now at the base of his skull, affectionately scratching at the nape of his neck.

He slowly pulls out, and you miss the stretch and the warmth immediately. You push up on your elbows, watching as the mixture of your pleasure leaks out of you, biting you lip.

"Fuckin' beautiful," he says almost reverently, mesmerized.

He spends the next hour cleaning you up, and you think your nails create permanent marks on his shoulders.

Time bleeds together.

His contract renews on the twelfth month.

He heard rumors that Price might switch him out for another guard.

You're at the meeting — it's your bodyguard, after all, they figure you should get some input. Price has two separate folders prepared. A sharp look from Simon is all Price needed to know about how he feels. The tongue lashing you give your higher ups has Price raising his eyebrows, and Simon sits forward a little more should he need to haul you out over his shoulder.

He wouldn't mind that too much, he thinks, but he'd rather not.

Ten minutes later and you're angrily signing his renewal papers, a blotch of ink at the start of your name as you didn't even read the contract before signing, lungs burning from your rant about personal safety and what the fuck are you thinking and I didn't just buy an entirely new tea set for nothing.

You grip his wrist as soon as he signs himself, dragging him to the nearest bathroom.

His hand covers your mouth as he fucks you deep and slow.

"Don't worry, darling, 'm not going anywhere."

Eighteen months into his contract, and he's never felt so little control before in his life.

He's meticulous, prepared, tactile.

There's a gun in his holster for distance threats and a knife in his sheath for those who dare get too close.

He makes sure to memorize the exists before you even get to the venue, now making no effort to conceal himself.

He's like a shadow, or a guard dog.

You've never felt more secure, more protected.

Until —

He doesn't know how it slipped past him.

He let his eyes linger a little too long on the curve of your neck, where a new diamond pendant lay with his initial engraved on the back. He admires the dip of the dress you wear, open-back that shows the enticing expanse of your back, the dress covering you above the curve of your ass. You look back at him briefly while whomever you're with speaks, eyes sparkling in the bright light of the room, a smile reserved just for him.

He hears the cock of a hammer and his eyes snap to a gentleman who brandishes a gun like he's never held one before in his life. His eyes, though. His eyes are like fire, black with rage, staring at you with such hatred.

You look one second too late.

Simon is on you right after the click of the trigger, pushing you to the floor and caging you with his body.

"Stay down and don't fucking move," he growls as he reaches for his own weapon, up in a flash.

You can't hear anything except white noise and screams that sound muffled, heart pounding and making it hard to breathe. Two shots ring out, in tandem, and there's the telltale sign of a body hitting the floor.

Simon is by your side, eyes scanning, frantic, looking for any signs of harm.

"You okay?" he asks, carefully outstretching his hands to let you stop him from touching you should you want. you don't.

"Fine," your voice cracks, and you can't stop shaking.

"You're okay, you're okay," he says, cradling your cheeks, thumbs wiping under your eyes. "I'm so fucking sorry," he adds, guilt heavy in his chest.

You grab his wrists lightly, tears streaming down your cheeks as you look him over. You gasp, unable to catch a real breath, unable to look away from his stomach.

"Simon — " you say, horror laced in your voice.

He looks down, seeing the red seep through his shirt.

Fuck.

At least it wasn't you, he tells himself.

Nineteen months into his contract, and he isn't dead.

While he's been shot before — a fact he tells you, assuming it would comfort you, but only got him a venomous glare in return — it's been awhile.

The hospital, the stitches, the gauze and needles. He hated it then and he hates it now.

Price comes to you in the hospital — they're keeping Simon for a little, to make sure there's no complications with his healing — offering another guard in the interim while he recovers.

You've never shot down a proposal so quickly in your life. The nerve.

Twenty-two months into his contract, and the last of the moving boxes are taped shut and labeled. Some of them in your writing, the others in his. The keys to your new house are tucked into his pocket, alongside a black velvet box.

"Why do we have so much shit," you whine when packing, only two boxes deep and so many rooms left to go. You're too busy stuffing a manatee shaped steeper into a box — mana-tea, you giggled when he opened it, him rolling his eyes fondly in reply — and don't see him pause, looking at you softer, never hearing "we" before like that. Never dreaming he could hear it like that.

A lot of stalling on your part and encouragement on his, and the last box is packed and placed in the back of the truck.

He laces your fingers together as you drive to the new house, a bottle of champagne already chilled.

Twenty four months into his contract, and you come home with something hidden behind your back.

You smile like you have a secret, which would be a first.

It's awkward to bring around from your back, but there's a large German Shepard puppy wiggling in your grip, tail wagging furiously.

He feels his heart stop for a moment, unable to take his eyes off the puppy, and then the band that's sitting around your finger. He touches his own subconsciously.

You set the ball of fur down, who immediately launches at Simon, whining and wiggling and trying to give him kisses.

There's a collar and tag already there, and you watch with your heart beating faster than ever, unable to stop the smile on your lips, as he wrangles the pup enough to read it.

Riley.

#ink by bambi #simon riley/reader #simon riley x reader #ghost/reader #ghost x reader #simon riley/you #simon riley x you #modern warfare imagine #modern warfare fanfic #simon riley imagine #simon riley smut #mondern warfare smut

4K notes · View notes

stylesispunk · 7 months ago

Text

Silent Strain | Part iii

Outbreak! Joel Miller x f!reader

previous part | next part

chapter summary: Joel is afraid of letting you out of his sight and you were afraid of him slipping away.

w.c: 16k> (it was going to be 8k but this happened)

warnings: angst, mentions of panic attack, fluff. no proofreading. Probably some things won't make sense, but I felt pressured and I had to post this chapter.

a/n: hello! Last fic I posted didn't go how I expected but here's another chapter of this series. I hope you like this chapter and PLEASE share your thoughts with me. Reblogs and comments are always appreciated. Happy reading 💌

dividers by @/saradika-graphics

As the first gloomy light of morning crept through the window, Joel felt like he could finally breathe again. The soft, grey dawn brought with it a sense of calm that the night had cruelly stolen away. He didn’t fear the darkness itself; he'd learned long ago to live within its shadows, but he feared the memories that the darkness brought to him. The loss, the crying, the desperation... and the blood.

The thought of losing another child, and losing you in the process, cracked the rough surface he had been hiding behind for so many years. It was too much; it was too familiar. As much as he tried to stay strong, the fear had gnawed at him, tearing at the fragile walls he had built around his heart.

Your breathing had steadied, though the pain had not fully subsided. He could feel your heartbeat against his chest, uneven but there, steadying his own frantic pulse. He had held you tighter, his own breath coming in ragged, uneven gasps, trying to stay calm for you, for the baby.

After the scare from last night, Joel had held you close, his arms wrapped tightly around you, his face buried in your hair. He whispered softly; words meant to soothe you but also to keep his own panic at bay. "It's okay, darlin'. I'm here. Just breathe. Stay with me…"

The hours had dragged on, and every flicker of discomfort on your face sent a fresh wave of panic through him. He hadn't let himself sleep, afraid that if he closed his eyes, he might wake up to another nightmare.

Now, in the pale morning light, Joel watched you. Your eyes were closed, but your breathing was calm and even, a welcome change from the strained, pained gasps that had filled the room only hours before. He stroked a thumb gently along your arm, his touch feather-light, afraid of disturbing you but needing the contact to ground himself.

Ellie, who had kept a worried vigil nearby, finally stirred awake. She glanced over and saw Joel watching you, the lines of tension still etched into his face.

"Is… is she okay?" Ellie whispered, moving closer, her eyes wide with concern.

Joel nodded slowly, his voice barely a murmur. "Yeah, I think… I don’t know.”

Ellie let out a breath she didn't realize she'd been holding. "God, Joel, you looked so scared," she admitted, trying to lighten the mood, though her voice was shaky. "I’ve never seen you like that."

Joel’s lips twitched into a faint, weary smile. "Guess I'm getting soft, huh?"

Ellie leaned against the wall, watching him carefully. "That isn’t bad thing," she muttered, her eyes flicking over to you. “She needs you.”

Joel’s gaze softened, his eyes returning to you, still sleeping peacefully. Then, his gaze went to Ellie’s again.

“Ellie, can you take care of her for a moment?”

Ellie nodded, confused as Joel stood up, walking towards the door without saying a word to her.

Joel's steps were heavy, each one echoing softly in the quiet room. He reached the door and paused for a moment, his hand resting on the rough wood. His shoulders were tense, his head slightly bowed as if wrestling with some invisible weight.

Ellie watched him, frowning. "Joel?" she asked, her voice barely more than a whisper. "Where are you going?"

He didn't turn around, didn't meet her gaze. "Just… need a minute," he replied, his tone low and strained. "I'll be back soon."

Ellie’s eyes flicked back to you, still resting, and then back to Joel. “She’s gonna wake up and ask for you,” she said, her voice gentle, but firm. "You sure you’re, okay?"

Joel nodded, though his movements were stiff, almost mechanical. "Yeah," he muttered, though he didn’t sound convinced. “I just need some air."

With that, he slipped out the door, the cold morning air rushing in as he opened it. He took a deep breath, feeling the sharp chill hit his lungs, grounding him momentarily. He stepped outside, letting the door close quietly behind him.

He stood there, just outside, his breath visible in the cold air, his mind racing. The panic from the night before still clung to him, like a dark shadow that refused to leave. His hands trembled slightly as he ran them through his hair, trying to calm himself down.

He couldn't shake the image of you in pain, the fear in your eyes, the blood on your hands. It felt like a nightmare he couldn't wake up from, a terrifying reminder of all the things he couldn't control, all the people he couldn't protect.

He closed his eyes, leaning against the wall of the house, his breathing coming in short, uneven bursts. He pressed his hands against his chest, trying to steady his heart, but the memories wouldn't let him rest. Memories of Sarah, of the pain of losing her, of the years spent hardening himself against that same pain.

And now, here he was again, facing the possibility of losing someone he cared about more than he wanted to admit.

"Come on, Joel," she muttered under her breath, killing the silence on Joel’s mind.

“Go back inside” he said.

Ellie jumped slightly at his words, her eyes darting to Joel. She could see the tightness in his shoulders, the tension in his jaw. For a moment, she considered arguing, but something in his voice stopped her. There was a rawness there, a plea she hadn’t heard before.

“Joel…” she started, her voice softer now, more careful.

His eyes flicked to hers, the pain clear, almost palpable. “Ellie, just… go back inside,” he repeated, his tone almost breaking. “Please.”

She hesitated, biting her lip, before nodding “You know it’s not your fault.”

Joel's face tightened at Ellie's words, his jaw clenching as if he was holding back a torrent of emotion. He shook his head, looking away for a moment, his gaze hard and distant, lost in anger and regret.

“I dragged her here,” he muttered, his voice rough and strained. “Knowing her state, knowing what could happen… I should’ve left her behind. Should’ve kept her safe.”

Ellie took a step closer, her own face a mix of frustration and empathy. “But you didn’t,” she argued softly. “Because you knew she’d never forgive you if you did. She wanted to be with you, Joel.”

He looked back at her, his eyes narrowing slightly as if weighing her words. “It doesn’t matter,” he replied, his voice a little louder now, a little more forceful. “I still made the call. I still put her in danger.”

Ellie shook her head. “You’re doing everything you can to protect her. You think she doesn’t know that?” She took another step closer, her tone firmer. “She trusts you, Joel. She believes in you. And… so do I.”

For a moment, Joel’s expression softened, the harsh lines of his face easing slightly. But then he closed his eyes, drawing in a deep breath, as if trying to steady himself. “I don’t know if that’s enough, kid,” he whispered, his voice barely audible.

Ellie sighed, glancing back at the door. “It has to be,” she said. “Because she needs you now more than ever. And you’re the one who’s gonna keep her safe.”

Joel let out a long, shaky breath, his shoulders slumping as if a weight had settled on them. He looked at Ellie, his expression caught between determination and fear. "Yeah… I hope you're right," he murmured, almost to himself.

Ellie reached out, touching his arm gently, a rare moment of softness between them. “Just… don’t beat yourself up too much, alright?” she said, her voice low. “She’s gonna need you to be strong for her. And so am I.”

Joel and Ellie stepped quietly back inside the house, the dim light from the early morning casting long shadows across the walls. Joel's eyes immediately moved to you, lying on the couch, your face still and peaceful in sleep. For a brief moment, he felt a strange calm settle over him, just seeing you safe, resting.

But as if sensing their presence, you began to stir. Your eyes fluttered open slowly, adjusting to the dim light. The ache in your body was still there, a dull throb in your stomach, but the sharp pain had subsided, leaving only a sense of heaviness. You blinked a few times, your gaze settling on Joel and Ellie as they stood by the door, both looking back at you with relief.

“Hey…” you murmured; your voice raspy with sleep. You tried to push yourself up, but Joel was by your side in an instant, his hands gently helping you to sit up. His touch was careful, as if he was afraid you might break.

“Take it easy,” he whispered, his voice low and soothing.

You nodded, wincing slightly as you adjusted yourself. “I’m sorry… I didn’t mean to… I just…” Your voice trailed off, and you swallowed hard, trying to find the right words. “I’m okay, really.”

Ellie stepped closer, her eyes wide with concern, but there was a hint of a teasing smile on her lips. “You better be, ‘cause I don’t think I can handle Joel being that freaked out again,” she said, trying to lighten the mood.

You chuckled softly, a weak smile spreading across your face. “Guess I gave you both a bit of a scare, huh?”

Joel’s expression softened, his thumb gently brushing against the back of your hand. “Yeah, you could say that,” he murmured, his voice thick with emotion.

He didn’t meet you gaze, and you know damn well what that meant. You noticed the way his eyes seemed to avoid yours, his gaze fixed on some invisible point in the room. His thumb kept moving over the back of your hand, but there was a tightness in his jaw, a hesitation in his posture that made your heart ache.

“Ellie,” you said softly, turning your head toward her. She paused, halfway through rummaging in the supply bag, her eyes darting between you and Joel. “Could you… give us a minute?”

Ellie hesitated, her gaze lingering on Joel for a moment, and then on you. She seemed to understand that something more needed to be said between the two of you. She nodded slowly, trying to mask her concern with a casual shrug. "Yeah, sure," she muttered, trying to play it cool, even as her curiosity buzzed beneath the surface. “I’ll, uh, go check on the weather or something.”

She grabbed her jacket, slinging it over her shoulders and headed toward the door. “But if I hear any yelling, I’m coming back in,” she added with a small grin, trying to lighten the mood before she slipped out the door, leaving the two of you alone.

The room was suddenly much quieter without Ellie’s presence. The only sounds were the crackling of the dying fire and the distant, muted wind outside. You turned back to Joel, your eyes searching his face. He still wasn’t looking at you, his thumb still moving in that steady rhythm against your hand.

“Joel,” you whispered, trying to draw his gaze back to yours. "Look at me."

He hesitated, his shoulders tense, but finally, he lifted his eyes to meet yours. You could see the conflict there, the worry, the guilt. “What is it?” you asked gently. “What’s going on in that head of yours?”

He took a deep breath, his jaw clenching for a moment before he spoke. "I… I’m sorry,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper. “For all of it. For dragging you out here, for… putting you in danger."

You shook your head, squeezing his hand. “Joel, I made that choice. I knew what I was getting into.”

He shook his head, his eyes dropping again, filled with that familiar guilt. “No… you didn’t. Not really,” he muttered.

You reached up, cupping his cheek with your free hand, forcing him to look at you again. “Joel, stop,” you said firmly, your voice steady. “Nothing is going to happen to us. I’m not going anywhere, and neither are you.”

He closed his eyes, taking a shuddering breath. “I’m just… I’m so damn scared,” he confessed, his voice breaking slightly. "Of losing you. Of losing another…"

You felt a lump form in your throat, understanding the weight of his words, the depth of his fear. You leaned closer, pressing your forehead against his, your voice soft.

“Joel, the baby is okay,” you reassured him softly, hoping your words would ease some of the fear you saw in his eyes. "I can feel it."

He shook his head slightly, his gaze dropping to the floor. “How do you know?” he asked, his voice low and rough. There was a tremor in it, a crack that revealed the depth of his concern. “How do you know when we’re out here, and everything’s…” He trailed off, his breath hitching.

You swallowed, trying to find the right words, to offer him some kind of comfort. “I just do,” you whispered, moving closer to him. “I can feel it. Maybe it’s just… a mother’s instinct. But I believe it, Joel. I feel like… this baby is strong.”

Joel's eyes softened at your words, but the fear still lingered there, heavy and ever-present. He swallowed hard, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he tried to steady himself. His hand moved to rest on your stomach, his palm pressing gently against the swell. He closed his eyes, as if trying to feel what you felt, to believe in what you were saying.

“Strong,” he repeated softly, almost like he was testing the word, trying it out to see if it fit. "I hope so… I really do."

You placed your hand over his, squeezing it lightly. “I know so,” you assured him, your voice unwavering. “I know it’s a little tiny thing but..I feel it.”

He exhaled slowly; his breath warm against your cheek. “I want to believe you,” he said finally, his voice barely above a whisper. "I do."

“Then believe me,” you urged, your thumb brushing against his cheek in a soothing motion. “We’ve made it this far, right? We’re almost there, Joel… we just need to hold on a little longer.”

He nodded, a small, reluctant smile tugging at the corners of his lips. “Yeah,”

For a moment, the room was silent except for the crackling of the fire and the faint sound of the wind outside. Joel finally met your gaze again, a mix of hope and fear in his eyes. "I’ve lost so much,” he confessed, his voice thick with emotion. “I can’t… I can’t lose you, too.”

Your heart ached at his words, understanding the depth of his pain. You leaned in, pressing a gentle kiss to his lips, trying to pour all the reassurance you could into that touch. "You won't," you whispered against his mouth. "I'm right here, and I'm not going anywhere."

He kissed your back, a little more desperately this time, as if he were afraid you might disappear. You held him close, feeling his body tremble slightly against yours, his breath coming in shallow, ragged bursts.

Ellie pushed the door open, her footsteps echoing in the quiet room. She froze mid-step, her eyes wide as she took in the sight of you and Joel, wrapped in each other's arms, lips just parting from the kiss. Her face scrunched up in mock disgust, and she rolled her eyes dramatically.

“Ugh, seriously?” she groaned, putting her hands on her hips. “If you two wanted to get all mushy, you could’ve at least sent me away or something. Or, I don’t know, given me a warning!”

Joel pulled back, a faint blush creeping up his neck. He coughed, trying to mask the embarrassment with a stern look. “Ellie,” he started, his voice gruff, but she just waved him off.

“No, no, it’s fine," she said with a playful grin, "I mean, I get it… the world’s falling apart, and you’re all about the dramatic declarations of love. But can you keep it PG for the kid in the room?”

You couldn’t help but laugh, the tension of the moment breaking as you met Ellie’s teasing gaze. “Sorry, Ellie,” you chuckled.

She rolled her eyes again but smiled, moving to sit on the edge of the bed beside you. "Yeah, yeah. Just… don't make me an unwilling participant in your cheesy romance, okay?" She paused, glancing between the two of you, her expression softening just a bit. "But… I’m glad you’re both okay.”

Joel shook his head, a small, reluctant smile forming on his lips. "We’re okay, kiddo," he replied softly, his voice still carrying a hint of emotion. "We’re all okay."

Ellie grinned, nudging Joel lightly with her shoulder. “Good,” she muttered, “'Cause I need both of you.”

You and Joel exchanged amused glances, and for a moment, the heaviness in the room seemed to lift, replaced by a sense of warmth and comfort in knowing you were all still together, facing whatever came next.

Four months had passed since that tense night, and winter had settled in with a cold grip. The once vibrant landscape had transformed into a stark, snowy expanse. You, now seven months pregnant, felt the weight of your journey more than ever, but the quiet strength of Joel and Ellie beside you made the harsh conditions more bearable.

Now seven months pregnant, you felt the weight of it all pressing down on you, not just the baby growing inside, but the miles you had trudged through the wilderness. Your feet ached, your back was sore, and your hands were red and raw from the cold. Yet, the quiet strength of Joel and Ellie beside you made the harsh conditions somehow more bearable. Joel, ever watchful, kept close, his eyes always scanning the horizon for any sign of danger, his presence a constant comfort. Ellie, with her relentless spirit, kept the mood light with her jokes and sarcastic comments, doing her best to distract you from the relentless chill.

The trio of you had walked through miles of frost-covered terrain, the snow crunching beneath your boots. Each step was a reminder of how far you had come and how much further you still had to go. Wyoming was just ahead, a small but significant milestone in your quest for safety and a future.

Joel trudged ahead, his face set in determined lines, but every now and then he would glance back at you, making sure you were okay. He had taken to carrying a small pack with supplies, his concern for you palpable. Ellie, now a bit more grown and experienced, walked close by, occasionally breaking the silence with a joke or a comment, trying to keep your spirits up.

You looked at Joel’s profile, his face partially hid the fear on his bones and despite his gruff exterior, he had become your rock through this tumultuous journey. You had come to rely on his strength and his soft, rare moments of tenderness.

December 1st

“Winter has arrived with a vengeance. The cold is biting, and our progress has slowed. We’re staying in an old barn for the night, huddled together to keep warm. Joel’s been making sure the fire stays lit, while Ellie tries to make the best of our situation.

I can feel the baby kicking more strongly now. It’s a constant reminder of why we’re enduring all of this. Joel’s been more attentive, though still guarded. He’s trying so hard to protect us, and I wish he could see that his presence alone is enough.

The snow makes everything look different. Almost beautiful, in a way that feels wrong given the world we’re living in. We made camp in a small cabin tonight. Joel found some firewood, and Ellie kept herself busy by trying to make soup out of what little we had. She’s worried about me, even though she pretends not to be. I can see it in the way she watches me, like she’s waiting for something to happen. Joel, too, keeps his eyes on me, never letting me stray too far. I think he’s afraid, maybe more than he’ll ever admit.

The baby’s been kicking more. It’s a strange feeling, like little taps from the inside, reminding me that there’s something good in this world. Something worth fighting for.”

The cold wind whipped around you, making it difficult to see very far ahead. Joel motioned for a short break, and you gratefully lowered yourself onto a nearby snow-covered log. Ellie quickly dug out some snacks and hot drinks from her pack, her hands red and numb from the cold.

“Here,” she said, handing you a steaming cup. “This should help warm you up.”

You took the cup gratefully, savoring the warmth as it seeped into your fingers and then your body. “Thanks, Ellie,” you said, smiling. “I don’t know how we’d have made it without you.”

Ellie shrugged; her cheeks flushed from the cold. “Just doing my part,” she said with a wink. “And keeping you guys from going completely crazy.”

Joel joined you, taking a seat beside you and offering you a small piece of dried fruit. “We’re almost there,” he said, his voice softer than usual. “Just a bit further, and we’ll be in Wyoming.”

You nodded, taking comfort in his words. “I know,” you replied. “It’s just... sometimes it feels like it’s never going to end.”

Joel’s hand reached out, gently resting on your knee for a few minutes to provide the comfort he knew you needed.

As you made your way through the snow-covered terrain, the excitement of nearing Wyoming provided a much-needed boost. Joel’s usual calm demeanor had been unwavering through most of the journey, but today, there was an underlying tension in his movements that you and Ellie didn’t immediately notice.

Joel’s breaths were more rapid and shallow, though he tried to mask it behind a determined facade. He kept a firm grip on his pack and occasionally glanced around with a slightly strained look. His face, though mostly hidden by his scarf, betrayed signs of an inner struggle that he wasn’t quite ready to share.

Ellie’s voice broke the silence, sharp and unfiltered as always.

"Are you dying?" she asked, half-joking but with an edge of genuine concern. She was walking beside you, her eyes narrowed at Joel, who hadn’t slowed his pace despite the obvious tension in his movements.

Joel grunted, his response delayed as he adjusted the pack on his shoulder. "No," he said curtly, his breath coming out in visible puffs in the cold air. "I’m fine."

"You don’t look fine," Ellie pressed, glancing at you as if seeking backup. "You’re all... sweaty and weird."

You frowned, watching Joel carefully now. Ellie wasn’t wrong—there was something off about him today. The way his shoulders hunched, his steps just a bit too heavy, like he was pushing through something. He had been quiet, more so than usual, and you could sense the strain behind his eyes whenever he glanced back at you.

"Joel?" you asked, your voice softer than Ellie’s but carrying the same concern. "What’s going on?"

He slowed his steps, finally stopping to catch his breath. His hand went to his side, rubbing it briefly before he straightened up, avoiding eye contact. "It’s nothin’," he muttered, though his voice lacked its usual strength. "Just... pushin' too hard today. We’re close, is all. No time to slow down."

Ellie crossed her arms, her eyes flicking between you and Joel with a skeptical look. "Right," she said, not convinced. "You’re not dying, but you’re also... not dying?"

Joel shot her a look that could’ve silenced most people, but not Ellie. "I said I’m fine."

You stepped closer to him, concern outweighing your hesitation. "Joel, you need to tell us if something’s wrong. You can’t carry this all by yourself."

He exhaled through his nose, the stubbornness etched in his expression softening for just a moment. "I’ll be alright," he said, though now his voice was quieter, less defensive. "Just... need a minute. We’ll keep movin’ after that."

Ellie threw her hands up. "Well, that’s reassuring," she muttered, but you could tell the worry hadn’t left her eyes.

You stayed close to Joel, watching him as he tried to steady his breathing, his hands resting on his knees for support. The tension that had been building inside you all day finally surfaced, the reality of how much you were relying on him pressing down on you. But even now, as he struggled, he was still trying to protect you both.

Joel glanced up at you, catching your gaze, and for a brief second, his walls dropped. There it was—the vulnerability he was so good at hiding, but not today. Not from you.

“I want to rest for a bit” you said, placing your hand over your swollen belly. You needed the rest, but you also wanted to force Joel to slow down a bit.

Joel’s eyes flicked down to your hand resting on your belly, then back up to meet your gaze. His expression softened, the usual stubborn resistance he wore melting away for a moment. He sighed, clearly torn between pushing forward and giving in to the obvious need for a break. You could see the struggle in him—the need to keep going, to get you all to safety—but he couldn’t deny the toll it was taking on both of you.

"Yeah, alright," he muttered, standing upright and scanning the area. "We’ll rest."

Ellie, who had been quietly watching the exchange, gave a slight huff of relief. "Finally," she said, throwing her pack down onto the snow and plopping down next to it. She stretched her legs out in front of her, rubbing her hands together for warmth. "You both needed this."

You nodded, grateful for the pause, though your focus remained on Joel. He had been pushing himself too hard, and the weight of that knowledge gnawed at you. It wasn’t just about the miles or the cold—it was the responsibility, the fear of what would happen if he couldn’t protect you both. You were carrying a life inside of you, and while you knew Joel would never admit it, that added an extra layer of pressure on him.

Joel knelt down beside you, his eyes still scanning the landscape as though danger could appear at any moment. "We won’t stay long," he said, his voice low. "Just enough time to catch our breath."

But it wasn’t true.

As night wore in, Joel had begun gathering wood for a fire, his movements stiff from the weight he carried, not just the physical strain but the burden of keeping you all safe. You watched him silently, your breath visible in the cold night air, as he crouched near a small clearing, arranging the branches and kindling with expert precision. The flicker of the firelight cast long shadows across his face, highlighting the tension in his jaw.

Ellie sat nearby, uncharacteristically quiet, watching Joel with a mixture of curiosity and concern. She hugged her knees to her chest, her usual stream of sarcastic comments absent for now. The cold seemed to have silenced her usual banter, or maybe she was just tired, like the rest of you.

Joel caught your gaze from across the fire, his eyes locking onto yours for just a moment longer than usual. He was tired—so tired. But he wouldn’t say it. He wouldn’t admit that he needed to rest just as much as the rest of you, if not more. His protectiveness ran so deep, it was like a force of nature, driving him even when his body begged for relief.

"You should sleep," he muttered, breaking the silence, his voice rough but soft. "I’ll keep watch."

"You need to rest too, Joel," you replied, your voice barely more than a whisper over the crackling fire. "You can’t keep pushing yourself like this."

He didn’t respond right away, his eyes flickering to the flames as if avoiding the truth of what you were saying. Ellie, sensing the tension, chimed in from her spot by the fire.

"Yeah, seriously, man. You’ve been on ‘protector mode’ for hours now. You’re not a machine, you know."

Joel grunted, his usual response when he didn’t want to argue but also didn’t want to agree. He poked at the fire with a stick, the sparks floating up into the dark sky. "I’m fine," he said again, the same phrase he’d been using all day, but it sounded weaker now. Less convincing.

You leaned back against the cave wall, watching him through the flickering light. He was still trying to protect you, still carrying the weight of all your lives on his shoulders. But you could see it wearing on him, the exhaustion, the fear he wouldn’t admit to, the responsibility that felt crushing.

"Joel," you said quietly, "we’re not going to make it if you don’t take care of yourself too.

His eyes snapped to yours again, something unreadable passing through them. For a moment, you thought he might argue, might tell you once again that he was fine. But then he sighed, the sound heavy with everything he wasn’t saying.

"I’ll rest when you two are safe," he said, his voice rough and tired, like he was trying to hold back the weight of the world. "I promise."

Ellie threw a stick into the fire, watching it crackle with an unimpressed look. "Great. So, we’re just supposed to wait until you collapse?"

Joel shot her a look, but it lacked its usual sharpness. You could see that even he was starting to acknowledge the truth.

And just when he was about to say something, you moved uncomfortable.

Before Joel could respond to Ellie’s sharp comment, you shifted in your spot, a small grimace passing over your face as the baby kicked again. This time, it was stronger, more insistent, and the discomfort rippled through you unexpectedly. You instinctively placed a hand over your belly, your breath catching as the sensation overwhelmed you.

Both Joel and Ellie immediately noticed the change in your posture. Joel's eyes widened, all traces of exhaustion vanishing in an instant as he leaned closer, his expression full of concern.

“What is it?” His voice was tight, his protective instincts kicking in instantly. “Are you alright?”

You nodded, though the tension in your face said otherwise. “I’m fine… it’s just… the baby’s kicking. It’s strong.”

Ellie scooted over, her eyes wide with curiosity and a mix of awe. “Whoa, really?” she asked, her usual snark replaced by genuine interest. “Can I feel?”

You smiled, despite the ache, and gestured for Ellie to come closer. She tentatively reached out, her small hand resting on your belly. A few moments passed, and then the baby kicked again, more pronounced this time. Ellie’s face lit up, her eyes going wide with amazement.

“That’s wild,” she breathed. “It’s like… a real person in there, huh?”

Joel remained still, his expression a mixture of hesitation and uncertainty. His eyes flickered from your face to your belly, where Ellie’s hand still rested, her excitement palpable. But Joel… his gaze was distant, conflicted, as though something heavy was weighing on his mind.

You watched him for a moment, noticing the subtle tension in his shoulders, the way his jaw clenched like he was fighting something deep within. He had been so protective of you and the baby, yet now, there was this hesitation that hadn’t been there before. Like the reality of it all was finally sinking in, and it scared him in a way he hadn’t expected.

Your heart softened at the sight of him—this man who had carried so much weight on his shoulders, trying to keep all of you safe. And now, with the baby growing inside you, it seemed like the responsibility was becoming even more overwhelming for him.

Without saying a word, you reached for Joel’s hand, gently pulling it toward your belly. He resisted at first, his eyes meeting yours with an uncertain look. But you smiled, reassuring him, and after a beat, he let you guide his hand to rest over where the baby had just kicked.

For a moment, the world seemed to stop. His hand, warm and rough, pressed against your belly, and then the baby kicked again—strong and insistent, like it was reminding him of its presence. Joel’s breath hitched, and his eyes widened in surprise. You could see the emotions flashing across his face—fear, wonder, maybe even hope—but he didn’t pull away.

He swallowed hard, his voice barely a whisper. “That’s… that’s the baby,” he said, his tone filled with awe, like he couldn’t quite believe it was real.

You nodded, your hand still resting on top of his, offering comfort. “Yeah, Joel. That’s our baby.”

For a moment, Joel just stared at your belly, his hand still pressed against you. Then, slowly, his walls started to crumble. His shoulders slumped, and he let out a shaky breath, the tension that had been building inside him for days finally releasing.

As you watched Ellie marvel at the sensation of the baby kicking, you couldn’t help but notice Joel’s face. His eyes, though focused on your belly, were distant, clouded with thoughts you knew all too well. His silence spoke louder than any words could, and you could see the weight of it pressing down on him, the same doubts and fears he always tried to hide. But this time, there was no hiding.

Without thinking, you gently placed your hand over Ellie’s, signaling for her to stop. "Hey, El… let’s give the baby a little break," you said, your voice soft but firm.

Ellie looked up at you, confused for a second, before pulling her hand back and sitting up straight. She shrugged nonchalantly, though her eyes lingered on your belly, clearly still amazed. “Yeah, sure. That was pretty cool though,” she muttered, leaning back and poking the fire with another stick.

But your attention wasn’t on Ellie anymore. It was on Joel. His hand was still resting on your belly, and he hadn’t moved. You could see the tension in his face, the way he was trying to hold it together for both of you. He needed to rest, to let himself break for just a moment, but you knew how hard that was for him. How much he felt like everything was on his shoulders.

"Joel," you said quietly, almost more gently than you intended. His name felt different on your tongue, like it wasn’t really you speaking.

He didn’t respond immediately, his eyes still locked on your belly. You took his hand and slowly lifted it away, placing it in his lap. He blinked, as if snapping out of a trance, and finally looked at you. The weariness in his face was undeniable now, and you could see the cracks in the facade he always tried so hard to keep in place.

“You need to rest,” you said, your voice soft but firm, with an edge that wasn’t quite your usual tone. It was more insistent, more like a command than a request. You weren’t just asking him to take a break—you were telling him.

Joel’s brows furrowed, his lips parting slightly as if to protest, but you cut him off before he could speak.

“I mean it,” you added, surprising even yourself with the intensity of your words. “You’re not going to help anyone if you collapse, Joel. We can’t keep going like this.”

His mouth closed, his eyes searching your face as if trying to figure out what to say, how to argue with you without pushing too hard. But he couldn’t. Not this time. Not with the way you were looking at him, with that mix of worry and determination that left no room for debate.

Ellie, sensing the shift in tone, stayed quiet, glancing between the two of you. For once, she didn’t throw in a sarcastic comment. She just waited, watching the fire crackle and listening to the tension settle around you.

Joel let out a long breath, his shoulders sagging as the fight drained out of him. He nodded, though it seemed reluctant, like he still couldn’t fully let go of the idea that he had to be the one holding it all together.

“Alright,” he muttered, rubbing a hand over his face. “Just for a bit.”

You exhaled, relieved, but you still held his gaze, making sure he understood. “It’s not just for us, Joel. It’s for you too. You need this.”

He nodded again, and this time, it seemed a little more genuine. “Yeah… I know,” he whispered, his voice raw with exhaustion.

Ellie glanced up, the smallest hint of a smile tugging at the corner of her lips. “Finally,” she muttered under her breath, though there was no bite in her words this time.

As Joel shifted to find a more comfortable position, he laid his head against your lap, his face pressing gently against your belly. The closeness of him, the warmth of his body leaning into yours, made something inside you tighten—an emotion you couldn’t quite name but one you understood all too well. His breaths slowed as the exhaustion finally caught up to him, his body surrendering to the rest he so desperately needed.

Your hand moved on its own, fingers threading through his hair, then brushing down to caress the rough stubble on his face. The small gesture felt both intimate and protective, like you were guarding him for once, in the only way you could. His face softened in his sleep, the tension that had etched itself into his features over the last few days easing away.

Ellie, watching the scene unfold, stifled a quiet chuckle. "Well, that’s a sight," she whispered, shaking her head with a faint smile. “Didn’t think I’d ever see Joel like this.”

You gave her a soft, knowing smile, your hand never leaving Joel’s face. “Yeah, me neither,” you whispered back. The fire crackled between you, casting soft shadows on the cave walls. For the first time in what felt like forever, it was you and Ellie staying awake, the weight of the night’s silence shared between the two of you instead of Joel.

Ellie stretched out her legs, staring into the flames. “So... how’s it feel?” she asked, her voice low as if she didn’t want to disturb Joel. “Y’know, the baby. It’s kinda crazy to think that in the middle of all this... you’re growing a person.”

You let out a quiet laugh, glancing down at Joel’s sleeping form, then at your belly. “Yeah... it’s crazy,” you admitted, your voice soft but filled with a quiet wonder. “But it feels... right, somehow. Like maybe this is the one good thing left in the world.”

Ellie nodded thoughtfully; her gaze still locked on the fire. “Guess we all need something good to fight for.”

Silence settled over you both, the crackling of the fire the only sound as the night stretched on. The cave was cold, but there was a warmth in this moment, a quiet bond growing between you and Ellie as Joel slept soundly against you.

For the first time in a long time, it felt like you had a moment to breathe and be still. And in that stillness, with Joel safe and Ellie by your side, you allowed yourself to hope, just for a little while, that maybe everything would be okay.

December 10th

We made it to Jackson today. It’s hard to believe after everything, but we’re finally here. We’re safe… but something doesn’t feel right.

Tommy was so happy to see us. To see Joel. I saw it in his eyes, the relief of having his brother back. And when he looked at my belly, he was surprised, of course, but happy. Even Maria, his wife is pregnant too. She seemed genuinely excited for us, for what this means. But Joel... Joel didn’t react the way I thought he would.

I’ve seen him handle danger, grief, and loss; nothing seemed to break him. But today, when Tommy told the news when Maria shared her news, I could see something change in Joel. He didn’t smile, didn’t share in the moment like I hoped he would. Instead, he shut down. And it hurts. It hurts to think that maybe he’s not ready for this, for us. Maybe he’s scared, maybe it’s just too much. I don’t know, but it’s like I’m carrying this alone.

I’m scared too. But I want this baby. I want us to be a family. And I thought… I thought Joel did too.

He’s with Tommy now, catching up after a long time or at least pretending to. I can feel something shifted, the distance between us growing, even though we’re finally somewhere safe. What if Jackson doesn’t fix this? What if the problem isn’t out there, but here between us?

You set the pen down and closed the journal, feeling the weight of the words settling into your heart. You glanced over at the new clothes Maria had left for you in the bed.

As you dressed in the clean, comfortable clothes Maria had left, the familiar weight of worry crept back in. The thoughts of the QZ and everything you’d been through tugged at the edges of your mind, but you pushed them aside, determined to move forward and focus on this new chapter in Jackson. This was supposed to be a fresh start. You were determined to make it feel that way.

The cold air outside hit you as you stepped out of the house, but it was fresh, invigorating. You pulled your jacket tighter around yourself and began walking through the quiet streets of Jackson, hoping that a bit of solitude would clear your head. But as you passed by one of the larger buildings in the town, you heard voices, low but familiar.

Joel and Tommy were inside.

You hesitated by the window, not meaning to eavesdrop, but you couldn’t help yourself. The tension in Joel had been building all day, and Tommy’s words floated out into the cold air.

“I thought you’d be happy for me, Joel,” Tommy said, his voice carrying a mix of frustration and concern. “I’m going to be a father. Can you believe that? I thought—hell, I thought you’d understand more than anyone.”

There was a long pause before Joel responded, and you could practically feel the weight of what was about to come.

“I don’t know if I want to be a father again,” Joel said, his voice low, almost too quiet to hear. It wasn’t a confession so much as an admission, like it was something he hadn’t even allowed himself to think about until now. “Tommy… it’s different this time.”

“You’ve got someone, Joel. She’s—she’s carrying your kid. That’s not something you just walk away from,” Tommy replied, clearly trying to keep his patience. “You don’t get to be scared and check out now. That’s not you. At least, that’s not the brother I know.”

“I know that,” Joel said, but there was a tremor in his voice that betrayed him. “But I’ve been through this before. And it didn’t end well. What if I can’t do it again? What if I can’t protect them?”

Tommy’s voice softened. “You’re not the same man you were back then. And you’ve got people now. You’re not alone in this, Joel. You don’t have to carry it all by yourself.”

Another silence followed, and you found yourself holding your breath, waiting for Joel to say something—anything—that would give you an idea of what he was feeling. But when he spoke again, his voice was strained, full of conflict.

“I want to be there for them. I do. But I don’t know how to be a father anymore. After Sarah... it feels like too much.”

Hearing him say her name, his late daughter, hit you like a punch to the gut. You hadn’t heard Joel talk about Sarah much, but you knew how deeply her loss had affected him. The silence that followed was thick with emotion, as if Tommy was waiting for his brother to find the words he was searching for.

“Then learn, Joel,” Tommy finally said, his tone soft but firm. “You can still be a father. It doesn’t have to be perfect. It just has to be you trying.”

You could hear the clink of glasses as Tommy poured them both a drink. Joel didn’t respond right away, and you took that as your cue to move away from the window, giving them the space they needed.

As you walked away from the window, your thoughts swirling with everything you’d just overheard, you almost didn’t notice Maria approaching from down the street. Her footsteps were quiet on the dirt path, and by the time you spotted her, she was already close enough to call your name.

“Hey,” Maria greeted softly, her eyes warm but cautious. She seemed to sense the heaviness on your shoulders. “I was just coming by to check on you. How’re you settling in?”

You managed a small smile, though the weight of what you’d overheard lingered in your chest. “It’s... good. It’s a lot to take in, but it’s good here.”

Maria studied your face for a moment, as if she could see the mix of emotions brewing beneath the surface. She gave a small nod, choosing not to press. Instead, she shifted the conversation to something else. “I wanted to let you know, we’ve got an ultrasound machine here in town. It’s old, but it works. If you want, we could take a look at the baby, make sure everything’s okay.”

Her offer took you by surprise, and for a moment, you weren’t sure how to respond. The thought of seeing the baby—of actually hearing its heartbeat, seeing it move—was both exciting and terrifying. You hadn’t had the chance for anything like this since leaving the QZ, and the opportunity stirred a mixture of emotions you hadn’t quite prepared for.

“I… I don’t know,” you admitted, glancing down at your belly.

Maria smiled gently, her understanding clear. “I get it. It can be overwhelming, especially with everything you’ve been through. But maybe it’ll help. You were out there for so long, it wouldn’t be bad give it a check.

You hesitated, then nodded slowly. “Yeah, maybe. I think I’d like that.”

“Good,” Maria said, her smile growing. “Okay, let’s go”

“What now?” you asked, surprised and afraid, there was a strange feeling on your heart at the thought of seeing your baby for the first time.

Maria chuckled softly, sensing your hesitation. “No time like the present,” she said, her voice calm and reassuring. “I know it’s a lot, but you’ve been through worse. This is something good, something for you. And for the baby.”

You felt a flutter of nerves as the reality of it hit you—the idea of seeing the baby, confirming its presence in a way that was more than just kicks and feelings. It was a lot to take in, and your heart raced at the thought.

“But... what if something’s wrong?” you blurted out, your voice quieter than you intended. It was a fear you hadn’t allowed yourself to voice until now, but it was there, gnawing at the back of your mind.

Maria’s expression softened even more. “That’s exactly why we check. If something’s wrong, we’ll know, and we’ll take care of it. But listen, you’ve come this far. You’re strong, and so is your baby.” She placed a gentle hand on your arm, grounding you. “You’re not alone anymore, okay?”

Her words gave you a sense of comfort you hadn’t realized you needed. You took a deep breath and nodded, more firmly this time. “Okay. Let’s do it.”

Maria smiled again, “Do you want to find Joel first?” she asked

But you thought about his words, and said no.

You shook your head, the memory of Joel's hesitant confession weighing on your mind. "No," you said quietly, but with conviction. "Not right now."

Maria studied your face for a moment, her expression thoughtful but understanding. She didn’t push, simply nodded. "Alright," she said gently. "This is your moment, then. Just you and the baby."

You appreciated her respect for your choice. As much as you wanted Joel to be there, to share this experience with you, part of you knew he wasn’t ready. He needed time to sort through his own fears, and you needed this moment to yourself, to connect with the life growing inside you without the burden of anyone else's emotions.

“Let’s go,” you said, your voice firmer now, a strange mix of nerves and excitement bubbling up inside you.

Maria led the way back toward the clinic, with Ellie joining you both, the air cool and crisp as you walked through the quiet streets of Jackson. Inside, the warmth of the room wrapped around you, soothing some of your tension. As you lay back on the table, ready to see your baby for the first time, you felt a flicker of hope, a hope that despite everything, you and this little life inside you could make it.

The door creaked open, and the doctor stepped in. He was tall, with tousled brown hair and kind eyes that immediately locked onto yours. There was a brief pause as he stood in the doorway, his expression shifting from professionalism to something softer, almost as if he were momentarily caught off guard.

"Hi, I’m Dr. Paul..." he trailed off, his gaze lingering on you just a second too long before he quickly composed himself, stepping further into the room. "Paul Mesner," he added, clearing his throat, his tone now more formal, though there was a warmth in it that you couldn’t quite place.

You shifted uncomfortably under his gaze, unsure of the sudden tension that filled the small room. It wasn’t overwhelming, but you could feel something shift in the air, as though Paul had felt something the moment he laid eyes on you.

Maria, standing by your side, glanced between the two of you, raising an eyebrow but choosing not to comment.

As you lay back on the examination table, the soft hum of the ultrasound machine filled the room. Maria stood nearby, and Ellie sat on a chair in the corner, her legs bouncing restlessly. Paul prepared the equipment, his movements efficient but gentle.

Ellie glanced around nervously, trying to act cool, but you could see the curiosity and excitement in her eyes. “So… this is where we get to see the little peanut?” she asked, her voice trying to mask her eagerness.

You smiled at her, feeling a sense of comfort that she was here. “Yeah, Ellie. This is where we’ll see the baby.”

When Paul applied the gel to your belly, Ellie’s eyes widened slightly, but she didn’t say anything, her attention fully focused on the screen. As the image flickered to life, the small form of the baby appeared, its heartbeat strong and steady. The room seemed to hold its breath.

He guided you through the process, explaining each step, though his voice was gentle, almost reverent. As the cold gel touched your skin and the machine came to life, Paul’s eyes never strayed far from yours. When he finally looked at the screen, the image of your baby appeared, and so it’s heart beating that filled the silence of the room.

“There it is,” Paul said softly, the awe clear in his voice. He glanced at you with that same warmth, but your focus was entirely on the screen. But when he looked at you again, there was something undeniably personal in his eyes, like you were the only person in the room.

Ellie leaned forward; her face lit up with wonder. “Holy shit… that’s… that’s the baby?”

You nodded, unable to tear your eyes away from the tiny form. “Yeah, that’s the baby.”

Ellie’s gaze flickered from the screen to you, then back again. “That’s… insane. It’s real,” she whispered, her usual bravado melting away in the face of something she couldn’t joke about.

Your heart skipped a beat as you stared at the tiny image on the screen, tears welling in your eyes.

As you stared at the tiny, flickering heartbeat on the screen, a rush of emotions overwhelmed you. Tears blurred your vision, but you couldn’t look away from the image. It was real—your baby, alive and growing inside of you. The room was quiet, except for the steady thrum of the baby’s heartbeat echoing in the air, a soft, rhythmic reminder that you were carrying a new life.

“Ellie,” you whispered, looking at her, “you’re going to be part of this too. You’re family.”

Ellie blinked, clearly moved by your words, though she quickly masked it with a grin. “Thank you” she said, smiling down at you.

Paul’s gentle voice brought you back, and when you glanced up at him, he was still looking at you, his eyes filled with something more than just professional care. It was warmth, empathy... maybe something else.

"You’re doing really well," he said again, his voice barely above a whisper, as though he didn’t want to break the delicate atmosphere of the moment.

You smiled weakly, feeling the tears spill over, but you quickly wiped them away. "I wasn’t sure what to expect," you admitted, your voice trembling slightly. "But hearing the heartbeat... it’s incredible."

Paul nodded, his gaze still steady on you, his expression soft. "It’s a moment that changes everything," he said, his voice full of sincerity. "You’ll remember this for the rest of your life."

His words settled over you like a blanket of reassurance, and for the first time since you had arrived in Jackson, you felt a small sense of peace. There was still so much uncertainty ahead, but in this moment, everything felt possible.

Maria, who had been standing quietly off to the side, finally broke the silence. "It’s beautiful, isn’t it?" she said, her voice filled with genuine warmth. She walked over to you and placed a comforting hand on your shoulder. "You’ve been through so much, but you’re going to be okay here."

You nodded, grateful for the support. But your thoughts drifted back to Joel, to the conversation you had overheard between him and Tommy. You couldn’t help but wonder how he would react when he saw this—when he heard the heartbeat and realized what was truly at stake.

But for now, you allowed yourself to just be in the moment, surrounded by the quiet reassurance of Maria’s words and Paul’s steady presence.

"Thank you," you whispered, meeting Paul’s eyes again.

He smiled, the corners of his mouth tugging upward just slightly. "Anytime," he said softly, and for a moment, it felt like he wasn’t just talking about the ultrasound.

As you, Ellie and Maria gathered your things and prepared to leave the small room, you felt Paul’s eyes lingering on you, even as you reached for the door. His gaze was soft, but intense, as if he couldn’t tear himself away. It left a strange flutter in your chest, a mix of emotions you weren’t ready to unpack.

“Thanks, Paul” you said, honestly, smiling at him.

Maria, standing by your side, must have noticed too. When you touched the door handle, ready to step out, she placed a gentle hand on your arm. “Wait for me outside,” she said, her voice calm but firm.

You hesitated, glancing between her and Paul, but then nodded, stepping out into the cool air of the hallway. As the door clicked shut behind you, a strange tension filled the room you had just left.

Inside, Maria turned to Paul, her eyes narrowing slightly as she studied him. His gaze had been a little too fixated on you, and Maria’s protective instincts kicked in immediately.

"Paul," she began, her voice quiet but filled with a clear warning. "Don’t ever think about it."

Paul blinked, his brow furrowing in confusion. "What do you mean?"

Maria took a step closer, her expression hardening. "I saw the way you were looking at her. But you need to understand something—she’s not here alone. The baby’s father is here in Jackson."

Paul’s eyes widened slightly in surprise, though he quickly tried to mask it. "I wasn’t—" he started, but Maria cut him off.

"Tommy’s brother," she said, her voice low and steady. "That’s the father. And trust me, you don’t want to get involved in that kind of situation."

Paul looked taken aback, the realization sinking in. He glanced down, his expression shifting as the weight of her words hit him. "I didn’t mean any disrespect, Maria," he said quietly, his tone more subdued now. "I just—"

"I know you didn’t," she replied, softening just a bit. "But I’m telling you now, for your own sake. Stay professional. Keep it that way."

Paul nodded, the intensity in his gaze dimming, replaced by something more resigned. "Understood," he muttered, his voice low.

Maria gave him a long, measured look before turning to leave. As she opened the door, she glanced back one last time, as if to reinforce her message. Then, without another word, she stepped outside to join you.

You and Ellie were waiting just outside, leaning against the wall, lost in thought. When Maria emerged, she gave you a small, reassuring smile.

"Ready to head back?" she asked, her tone light, as if the conversation inside had never happened.

You nodded, pushing yourself off the wall.

The makeshift theater was packed with people from the community, the flickering light from the old projector casting shadows on the walls. It felt surreal, sitting there with everyone, watching a movie like things were normal. For a brief moment, you allowed yourself to sink into that illusion—into the laughter, the shared smiles, the warmth of the crowd around you.

But then you saw Joel, after missing him for the whole day.

He was sitting a few rows ahead, his posture tense, eyes focused on the screen but not really watching. You’d been keeping an eye on him ever since you got there, sensing the turmoil still brewing beneath the surface. As the movie played on, Joel stood quietly and slipped out of the room, unnoticed by most. Except for you.

Something stirred in your chest, a familiar pull that you couldn’t ignore. You glanced around, checking if anyone else noticed, but everyone was still absorbed in the film. Quietly, you stood and followed him out, slipping through the door into the cold night air.

The streets of Jackson were quiet, the sound of the movie muffled behind you as you walked. You could see Joel ahead, his figure silhouetted against the dim streetlights. His hands were stuffed in his pockets, his steps slow, like he wasn’t sure where he was going, just that he needed to get away.

“Joel,” you called softly, your voice breaking the silence.

He stopped but didn’t turn around immediately. You quickened your pace, coming up beside him. When you reached him, he finally looked at you, his expression a mix of exhaustion and something deeper—something you couldn’t quite place.

"You okay?" you asked gently, though you already knew the answer.

Joel let out a long breath, his shoulders slumping as if the weight he’d been carrying all night had become too much. "Just needed some air," he muttered, his voice rough, but not unkind.

You fell into step beside him, walking in silence for a while, letting the quiet between you settle. You knew Joel wasn’t one to open up easily, and you didn’t want to push him. But you couldn’t just leave him to his thoughts, not when you knew he was struggling.

"Talk to me, Joel," you said softly. "What’s going on?"

He was silent for a moment, his jaw tightening as he tried to find the right words. Finally, he spoke, his voice barely above a whisper. "I don’t know if I can do this."

Your heart tightened at his words. "Do what?"

"All of it," he said, his voice strained. "Being here... with you, the baby. It feels like I’m tryin’ to fit into somethin’ I don’t deserve. I don’t know how to be this person anymore."

You stopped walking, turning to face him, the moonlight casting shadows across his face. "Joel, you don’t have to have it all figured out. None of us do."

He shook his head, his gaze dropping to the ground. "I want to be there for you, for the baby, but I don’t know if I can protect you. I’m scared I’ll fail again."

The mention of his past failures cut deep, and you could see the ghosts of his memories haunting him. Sarah. The QZ. Every person he couldn’t save.

"You won’t fail," you said firmly, stepping closer, placing a hand on his arm. “I saw the baby today” you said with a tiny smile appearing.

His eyes flickered up to meet yours, a hint of surprise breaking through the heaviness that surrounded him. "What do you mean, you saw the baby?" he asked, the tension in his voice softening just a fraction.

You took a breath, feeling warmth spread through you at the memory. "Maria took me for an ultrasound. It was… incredible. I felt the heartbeat, Joel. It’s real. There’s a little life in there."

A mixture of emotions crossed his face, curiosity, wonder, and a flicker of fear. "And? What was it like?"

You smiled wider now, unable to contain the joy bubbling within you. "It was amazing. The little form on the screen, just... there. It made everything feel more possible, like maybe we really could do this."

For a moment, Joel’s expression softened, and you could see the flicker of hope behind his eyes. "That’s… good," he said, his voice barely above a whisper, almost as if he was afraid to believe it.

"It is," you reassured him, stepping closer until there was barely any space left between you. "And you’re going to be a part of that, Joel. You’re not just the protector; you’ll be a father. And I know it’s scary, but it’s also something to live for."

He looked down, his brow furrowing as he processed your words. "You really think so?"

"I know so," you said, reaching up to cup his face again, letting your thumb brush gently across his cheek. "You’re already so protective of us, and that matters more than you realize. You’ll figure it out as we go along."

As you stood there, the world around you faded into the background, leaving just the two of you in that intimate moment. Something in Joel shifted, the walls he had built around his heart starting to crumble. You could see the conflict within him, fear battling against a yearning to embrace this new reality.

With a gentle tug on his shirt, you pulled him closer, your heart racing in anticipation. "Trust me," you whispered, your eyes locking onto his.

And then, without overthinking it, you leaned in, your lips brushing against his. The kiss was tentative at first, a mingling of uncertainty and hope. But as he responded, deepening the kiss, you felt a wave of warmth wash over you, as if the two of you were forging a new bond amidst the chaos.

His hands found your waist, holding you close, and for those brief moments, it felt like everything else faded away, your fears, the weight of the past, the uncertain future. It was just you and him, sharing something genuine and profound.

When you finally pulled back, your foreheads rested against each other, both of you breathing heavily, the world outside momentarily forgotten. The flicker of fear in his eyes had shifted to something softer, more determined.

"You really mean it," he said, his voice rough but filled with newfound conviction.

"I do," you replied, smiling up at him. "We’re in this together, Joel. No matter what."

He nodded, a faint smile breaking through the weight he had been carrying.

As the warmth of the moment lingered, Joel’s hands moved gently to your belly, resting there as if he were trying to connect with the little life growing inside you. His expression softened, and a protective instinct shone in his eyes.

“Get some rest,” he murmured, his voice low and steady. “You’ve been through a lot today. We both have.”

You nodded, appreciating the concern in his tone. “I will. But I want you to come back soon, okay?”

A small smile tugged at the corners of his lips. “I will. Just need a minute to clear my head.”

With a lingering touch, he pulled his hands away, and you felt a strange mix of warmth and longing as he stepped back. “I’ll see you in a bit,” he promised, his gaze still fixed on you, as if he were memorizing every detail.

You turned, feeling lighter, ready to head back inside and allow yourself the rest you needed. As you walked away, you glanced over your shoulder one last time, catching his eye. The connection between you remained palpable, and you knew that this was just the beginning of something profound.

As you stepped back into the house, the warmth hit you immediately, chasing away the cool night air. Ellie was sprawled on the couch, flipping through a book she'd found earlier, her legs crossed as she absentmindedly skimmed the pages.

She looked up as you entered, her face softening into a lopsided grin. "You okay?" she asked, her tone casual, but you could hear the concern behind it.

You nodded, sitting down beside her. "Yeah. Just needed to talk with Joel for a bit."

Ellie studied your face, her eyes sharp. "And? Everything good?"

You smiled gently, trying to reassure her. "It will be. We’re figuring things out, one step at a time." You hesitated for a moment before continuing, "You know, we could be a family here. You, me, Joel… and the baby."

Ellie blinked, her usual tough exterior cracking just a bit. She let out a breath, leaning back against the couch. "A family, huh?" she muttered, her voice almost too soft for her usual snark. "Never really had one of those."

"You do now," you said, placing a hand on her shoulder. "It’s not perfect. None of this is. But we’re all in this together."

Ellie let the words sink in, her eyes drifting toward the window as if trying to imagine what a life here could be. "Guess I could stick around," she said, a small smile tugging at her lips. "Teach the kid how to shoot and stuff."

You chuckled softly.

+++++++++++++

Meanwhile, on the other side of the community, Joel sat at the bar with Tommy, the weight of his emotions too much to bear any longer. He stared down at the whiskey in his hand, his knuckles white from gripping the glass too hard.

"Tommy…" Joel’s voice was low, broken, as if the words were being pulled from some deep, hidden place. "I need you to do something for me."

Tommy frowned, concern flickering across his face. "What is it?"

Joel swallowed hard; his throat tight. His eyes were red, the strain of the day finally catching up with him. "I need you to take Ellie to the Fireflies."

Tommy blinked; his confusion clear. "What? Joel, -“

"She’s immune” Joel cut him off, his voice cracking as tears welled up in his eyes. "But I can’t do it I can’t take her. I don’t have the heart to leave my woman behind.”

Tommy’s gaze softened, understanding dawning on him. "You mean…"

"She’s pregnant, Tommy. I can’t take her with us. I can’t risk her life or the baby’s. And I can’t just leave them behind, not after everything." Joel’s voice wavered, his hands shaking as he finally let the tears fall, his tough exterior crumbling. "I thought I could do it… thought I could keep everyone safe, but I’m just not strong enough.”

Tommy leaned forward, his expression torn between concern and disbelief. "Joel, you don’t have to do this alone. You’ve got people here. You’ve got me."

Joel shook his head, wiping at his eyes. "Ellie needs to get to the Fireflies, for the cure. It’s what she’s meant for. But I can’t go, not with the baby coming. I need you to do this for me, Tommy. Please."

Tommy was silent for a long time, his heart breaking for his brother. "Joel… are you sure?"

Joel’s shoulders slumped as he nodded, the weight of his decision pressing down on him. "I don’t want to lose her, but I can’t lose them either. I can’t make this choice."

Tommy sighed heavily, rubbing a hand over his face. "Alright," he finally said, his voice thick with emotion. "I’ll take Ellie. But, Joel...”

Joel took a shaky breath, his hands trembling as he gripped the edge of the bar. “It’s not just Ellie, Tommy. It’s me too.” His voice cracked, and for the first time in what felt like forever, he let himself be vulnerable. “I’ve been having these panic attacks. Can’t breathe, can’t think straight. I… I haven’t felt this way since… since Sarah.”

Tommy's eyes widened, a mixture of shock and concern flooding his expression. "Joel…"

“I try to hold it together, but I’m falling apart, man. And I don’t know how to stop it,” Joel confessed, his voice breaking. “I’ll be out there, trying to protect her, trying to protect all of us, and suddenly it hits me — like a damn freight train. My chest tightens, my heart races, and I feel like… like I’m losing control.”

Tommy was silent for a moment, letting the weight of Joel’s words sink in. He'd seen his brother take on the world, survive impossible situations, but this was different. This was something Joel couldn’t fight with his fists or a gun.

“I can’t do this anymore,” Joel whispered, running a hand through his hair. "I'm scared all the time, Tommy. Scared that I’ll mess it up. That I’ll lose Ellie. That I’ll lose..." He faltered, swallowing hard. “That I’ll lose them both.”

Tommy stepped closer; his voice gentle but firm. “You don’t have to carry this alone, Joel. You never did. It’s okay to feel this way, man. No one expects you to be invincible.”

Joel let out a bitter laugh, though there was no humor in it. “But that’s what I’ve always had to be, ain’t it? The strong one. The protector. I don’t know how to be anything else.”

“You’ve been protecting people your whole damn life,” Tommy said, his tone filled with empathy. “But now… now it’s time to let people protect you too.”

Joel’s eyes were red, his jaw tight as he fought the urge to break down. “I don’t know if I can do this without her. Without them.”

“You don’t have to,” Tommy said quietly. “But I’ll take Ellie to the Fireflies. I promise I’ll keep her safe. You take care of yourself, Joel. Take care of the family you’re building here. You’ve earned that.”

Joel nodded; his heart heavy but grateful for Tommy’s understanding. He still felt the crushing weight of his fears, but for the first time in a long while, he didn’t feel completely alone. Tommy was there. Ellie was there. You were there. And soon, there would be a baby who needed him too.

But still, his tears silently fell as he tried to hold himself together. This was the hardest thing he’d ever had to do, and it tore him apart inside. But he knew it was the only way to protect the people he loved. Even if it meant letting go.

+++++++++++++

You sat on the couch with Ellie, the warmth of the fire crackling in the fireplace nearby, casting a soft glow across the room. Ellie was watching the flames, her mind elsewhere, while you found yourself glancing down at your belly again, thinking about everything that was changing, everything that was coming.

“Ellie,” you began softly, breaking the comfortable silence between you. She turned her head slightly, her expression expectant. “I’ve been thinking… Would you wait until after the baby is born to go to the Fireflies? Just a little longer?”

Ellie’s brow furrowed slightly, as if the idea weighed heavily on her. She didn’t answer right away, and you could see the internal struggle flicker in her eyes.

“I know you want to help,” you continued, your voice gentle. “I know you want to be the cure, to make a difference. But… it’s dangerous out there. And I don’t want to lose you.”

Ellie shifted uncomfortably, pulling her knees up to her chest as she stared down at the floor. “It’s not about me, though,” she said, her voice low but steady. “I get it, you want me to stay, but the cure... it could give the baby a better future. It could give everyone a better future. And I can’t just sit here while I have the chance to do that.”

Her words struck you deep, and you couldn’t help but feel a pang of guilt for wanting her to stay, to keep her close, to keep her safe. But Ellie had always been selfless, always thinking of others, always wanting to make things better.

You sighed, resting a hand on your belly as the weight of her words sank in. “I just want you to be safe, Ellie. You mean a lot to all of us. And I don’t want to see you hurt.”

Ellie smiled faintly, though her expression was filled with understanding. “I know. But… if I can do something to stop all of this, the infection, the danger, then the baby… they won’t have to grow up like this. They could have a real life, without the constant fear of what’s out there.”

The thought of that future, one where the baby didn’t have to face the same horrors that you and Ellie had, made your heart ache. She was right, and that was what made it so hard.

Ellie noticed the worry lines forming on your forehead and reached over, giving your arm a gentle nudge. “Hey,” she said, her voice softening, “don’t stress yourself out. You’ve got enough to think about. Go and rest. You need to take care of yourself, and the peanut.”

You offered her a tired smile, appreciating the concern in her tone. “You sound like Joel.”

Ellie smirked. “Guess he’s rubbing off on me.”

You laughed softly, but the weight of the conversation still hung in the air. “Just… promise me you’ll think about it, Ellie. Please.”

Ellie met your gaze, her eyes serious. “I’ll think about it,” she said, and though you knew her mind was made up, her words gave you a small sense of comfort.

With that, you slowly stood, feeling the fatigue settle into your bones. Ellie watched you with a hint of amusement in her eyes. “Go rest, Mom-to-be,” she teased. “I’ll be here.”

You chuckled softly, grateful for the lightness she brought to the moment. “Alright, alright. I’m going. Good night, Ellie.”

“Good night” she replied, smiling as you entered the bedroom.

Joel stood outside for what felt like an eternity, staring into the darkness, weighed down by the decision he had made. He knew it was the right thing to do, but it didn’t make it any easier. The thought of sending Ellie away with Tommy gnawed at him, the fear of losing her or failing her again tightening around his chest like a vice.

Finally, with a heavy sigh, he walked back into the house, his footsteps slow and hesitant. The place was quiet, a stillness that only made the ache in his heart more pronounced. He stopped by the door to your bedroom, hearing the soft rhythm of your breathing. You were resting, just like you needed to be.

But there was another conversation he couldn’t avoid.

Joel walked down the hall to Ellie’s room. The door was slightly ajar, and he could see her sitting on the edge of her bed, lost in her own thoughts. She turned her head when she noticed him, her eyes narrowing with suspicion.

“What’s up?” she asked, trying to keep her tone casual, but there was an edge to her voice that Joel couldn’t ignore.

Joel hesitated for a moment before stepping inside. He couldn’t meet her gaze right away. “Ellie, we need to talk,” he said, his voice low and thick with the weight of his words.

She sat up straighter, sensing that something was wrong. “What is it? What happened?”

Joel rubbed a hand over his face, trying to find the right words, but all that came out was, “Tommy’s taking you to the Fireflies.”

The room fell into a tense silence, Ellie’s eyes widening in shock before narrowing in anger. “What? No,” she said, her voice rising. “You’re supposed to take me. That was the plan!”

“I can’t,” Joel replied, his voice breaking just slightly as he tried to keep his composure. “I can’t leave them behind. Not with the baby coming.”

“Are you kidding me?” Ellie snapped, standing up now, her fists clenched at her sides. “You’re just gonna pass me off to Tommy like I’m some burden? What the hell, Joel?”

“It’s not like that,” Joel said, shaking his head, but the guilt was already eating at him. “I’m trying to protect you.”

Ellie scoffed, her frustration boiling over. “Protect me? you’re just okay with sending me away? Why can’t you take me?”

Joel took a deep breath, the panic rising inside him. “Ellie, I’ve been having these panic attacks,” he admitted, his voice shaking. “I can’t—I’m not strong enough anymore. I can’t do it. I can’t protect you the way I need to, not with all of this happening. I don’t want to fail you.”

Ellie’s anger wavered for a moment, her eyes searching his face. “Joel…,” she said, her voice softer now. “You’re not gonna fail me. You never have.”

“I already have,” Joel whispered, his eyes dropping to the floor. “Too many times. I couldn’t save Sarah. I couldn’t stop Tess from getting hurt. I won’t let you get hurt too, Ellie. And I can’t leave them—her, the baby—behind. I just can’t.”

Ellie’s face softened, but the frustration was still there. “Joel, I don’t want Tommy to take me. I want you. We’ve been through all of this together. It’s you and me. You don’t get to just hand me off when it gets hard.”

Joel’s eyes were wet now, the emotions too much to hold back. “I’m trying to keep you safe, Ellie. That’s all I want.”