#here's a little gen fic for y'all

[gratuiciel]

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: 東京卍リベンジャーズ | Tokyo Revengers (Manga), 東京卍リベンジャーズ | Tokyo Revengers (Anime) Rating: General Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Kisaki Tetta & Takemitchy | Hanagaki Takemichi Characters: Kisaki Tetta, Takemitchy | Hanagaki Takemichi, Tachibana Hinata (Tokyo Revengers) Additional Tags: Future Timeline: Final Reset | Toman Has Nine Founding Members (Tokyo Revengers), Character Study, Bullying, Panic Attacks, No beta we die like (time leap trigger sound) no one apparently, (Points at Kisakid in any timeline) Get Cherished Idiot Summary:

Set during the final timeline, starting from a certain day at the park.

Takemichi meets his mortal enemy again and decides to befriend him this time.

[kiwichaeng]

And there I stand to the side, five minutes early to my errand, reading omegaverse fanfiction

[ujunxverse]

ngl the 2023 writerblr/ficblr climate is so bad....

[hoshologies]

ALL GREEK LOVE, LEE H.

synopsis — you spent the entire summer telling your family that you weren't going to join a sorority. now not only are you an initiated member of delta eta sigma, but you've been elected to the social chair position for you chapter. that's all well and good until heeseung lee, the newly elected social chairman for lambda rho and well-known in the greek community, reaches out to you to start planning runouts between your respective chapters. and now you're spending a lot more time with the cutest boy you've ever met.

genres &&. warnings — romance, fluff, meet-cute, smut, strangers to friends to lovers!au, college!au, greek life!au &&. underage drinking, afab!reader, tipsy sex, dry humping, oral (f!receiving), fingering, overstimulation.

word count — 15.7k.

from the author — not to be totally sorority girl, but the way i see greek life depicted in college au fics is CRAZY. now that i'm back hardcore into my kpop stan era, i rewatched the drunk-dazed mv and was like hmm... so the ultimate plan here was to write heeseung filth but also portray greek life a little more accurately because even if i'm not a huge fan, one thing about me is i'm gonna make sure y'all KNOW that greek life isn't just parties every weekend.

jokes aside, i really hope you enjoy this fic and my first real return to writing. likes, reblogs, and feedback are always welcome. and honestly, if you have any questions about greek life that you just have to know the answer to, i'm an open book.

if you enjoyed it, feel free to buy me a ko-fi!

the entire summer before starting your freshman year of college, you had told your family that you weren’t going to join a sorority. in your mind, there was a specific mold that one needed to fit into to join a sorority and quite frankly, you checked none of the boxes of those stereotypes. 

yet here you sit, months later, in your sorority’s chapter meeting. and you’ve just been elected to the social chair position of the chi nu chapter of delta eta sigma. 

truthfully, you’re not quite sure how you ended up here. you hadn’t formally rushed the week before school, but a couple of drunk girls at a frat party at the beginning of the semester had told you that you should rush their sorority. maybe you’d been a little desperate to branch out or maybe you were just a little curious of what rushing looked like, but a few days later at the student organization fair, you’d found the booth for the sorority the girls had told you they belonged to, delta eta sigma, and signed up for their informal rush.

by the end of october, you had been extended a bid, assigned a big, and promptly initiated into the chapter in what you jokingly referred to as a cult ritual (how could you describe it any other way? all white outfit? candles? promises to not divulge secrets about rituals that happen behind closed doors?).

and now, just three weeks after officially joining the chapter, you’ve ended up on the programming board somehow. you’d gotten a call from the selection board while sitting in the drive-thru of mcdonalds, waiting impatiently for your order of fries and a sprite as a treat for doing well on your gen psych quiz. the girl who’d called you said you’d made “quite the impression” on the sorority since accepting the bid and that they (including the chapter advisor) thought you’d be the perfect fit for the social chair.

“it’s a solo position, so you won’t have a co-chair like community service does, but given your grades so far this semester and the impact you’ve made on the chapter already, we would really love to see what you can do in this position! would you be interested?”

so really, how could you say anything but yes? you still don’t think you fit all that perfectly into the chapter, but they were giving you an opportunity to get involved and to make yourself fit. your name is announced for the social chair, one of your senior pictures pasted up on the powerpoint, and the girls around you smile and snap their fingers. from the executive board seats up front, your big smiles at you, eyes sparkling with something akin to pride.

a few days later, as you’re getting lunch at the student union, your phone screen lights up with a notification from groupme. a name you vaguely recognize is paired with a message that gets cut off after a few words.

heeseung lee: hey! this is heeseung from lambda rho and…

as you sit down with your salad and dr. pepper, you click the notification and read it in full. at the very top of the new message thread is heeseung’s picture and it clicks where you recognize him from. he’s friends with your big and he’s involved in a few of the bigger student organizations on campus, namely the activities board, so you’ve seen him in the student union fairly often.

[1:36 pm] heeseung lee: hey! this is heeseung from lambda rho! i’m friends with liv and she told me that you just got elected as the new social chair for your sorority. i just got slated into the same position for my frat.

[1:36 pm] heeseung lee: i know we won’t start running things until next semester, but i just wanted to reach out and touch base with you. i’m really looking forward to planning runouts with you next year :]

[1:37 pm] heeseung lee: sorry. i hope that wasn’t too weird. i guess i’m just a little too excited and want to get a bit of a headstart on things. have a good day!

you laugh to yourself, shaking your head as you set the phone down to take a bite of salad. before getting involved in greek life, you always assumed sorority girls and frat guys were airheaded and mean, people who peaked in high school, trying desperately to drag those glory days out. obviously since then, you’ve come to realize that while it is true in some occasions, most times, greek life members are the opposite.

heeseung, who you’ve never spoken to before, is proving that.

[1:42 pm] hi heeseung! not weird at all, i promise. and i’m really excited to plan events with you next semester too :]

by the beginning of february, you haven’t done much with your position. granted, the semester has only really been in full swing for about a week and a half and you have two full semesters to do plenty of things, but you’re itching to start planning. the binder you were given after the officer transition ritual has so many good ideas, everything from runouts with frats and sororities to both formal and semiformal.

while you’re brainstorming ideas for potential social events late on a tuesday night, your phone lights up from its spot on your nightstand, the short bell sound ringing out. you reach for it absentmindedly as you finish writing down the idea you had (rent out skating rink??? check budget). since the beginning of the school year, you’ve become desensitized to the groupme icon when it appears in your notifications, so much so that you barely register heeseung’s name upon first glance. it takes a second look for you to realize who’s texted you.

[9:12 pm] heeseung lee: sorry for texting so late. i just wanted to see if you wanted to meet up some time and start on some ideas for a runout?

[9:12 pm] heeseung lee: obviously not now!! but if you’re free some time this week, we could meet somewhere and talk. i spent all of winter break brainstorming stuff, so i’d really like to run it by you if that’s ok.

[9:14 pm] hi again heeseung. i was actually planning on getting lunch tomorrow at the student union after i’m done with class at 11 if you’re free then?

the second you press send, you immediately start second guessing yourself. does it come off like you’re asking him to have lunch with you? because that wasn’t your intention. really, you just meant that you’re going to be on campus proper for a little bit and wanted to offer to meet before you got lunch. not that it would be a bad thing if he asked if you could get lunch together; liv likes heeseung well enough and you’ve seen him around, and he really does seem nothing but nice, so lunch really couldn’t hurt— okay, take a breath. it is not that serious.

you take a deep breath and then let your muscles go lax as you exhale. better. 

it feels like ages pass before he texts back. you’re worried you’ve scared him off, but it really shouldn’t be that stressful. it’s just a text and he’s the one who wanted to meet up in the first place anyways; you just offered a time and location. but finally, your phone dings again and his name lights up your screen.

[9:21 pm] heeseung lee: actually that works perfect!! i get out of class at the same time and usually grab lunch at the u before heading to the activities board office. wanna meet by the dining area next to the office?

[9:21 pm] sounds like a plan!! i’ll see you then!

heeseung, you realize as you set your phone down and put away your binder for the night, is the only social chair of any of the greek organizations who has reached out to you to start getting the ball rolling. he seems to be just as anxious as you are about doing this job well, which makes you feel at least a little validated. nervous and jittery though you may be about meeting him for the first time tomorrow after only having chatted with him over text twice, the idea of him feeling the same as you brings a strange form of comfort. with enough of it, you actually start looking forward to seeing him tomorrow as you lay down to sleep, mind running a mile a minute with what it’ll be like to meet him after all of the things you’ve heard about him from liv. by the time you slip into the embrace of sleep, anxiety has boiled down into anticipation.

at 11:02 the next morning, heeseung nearly scares the hell out of you when he shows up at the designated meeting spot. you’re so invested in your twitter scroll that you don’t notice when he walks up. it’s not until he says a soft “hi” that you jump and almost drop your phone in the process. when you look up, there’s a worried look on his face.

“sorry! i didn’t mean to scare you!” 

after a moment to catch your breath, you shake your head and wave his worry off, though the gesture doesn’t do much to make that worried look on his (undeniably pretty) face. “it’s okay, heeseung. really.”

to really seal the deal, you shoot him a gentle smile, trying to prove that your heart isn’t about ready to give out anymore. you feel blessed when he returns it, all quirked up at the corners and smile lines and soft, plush cheeks. silence falls, the two of you smiling and staring at each other like idiots until heeseung shakes himself out of his stupor.

“anyways…” he clears his throat and moves his gaze towards the food court. “what did you want to get to eat? my treat.”

you look up at him, at the way he’s pointedly not looking at you and instead examining the restaurants just beyond the dining areas. you know, the restaurants that have been the same for the last five years probably and will be here for another five, the ones he’s grabbed food from at least a couple of times since the semester started and even more since the beginning of the school year. 

“you don’t have to buy me lunch, heeseung. it’s-”

he finally turns to look at you again, that same easy smile still pulling his features into a soft form of happiness. “it’s no problem, really. just an act of good faith. all greek love and whatnot, you know?”

you laugh a little at that, conceding but allowing him to choose where he wants to get lunch from since he’s the one paying and you don’t really have a preference. by the time you’re sat opposite each other at a table with meals from the burger stall, your stomach is rumbling. you’re about half of the way through your burger when heeseung looks up from his fries, clearing his throat to get your attention.

“so…” he starts. it’s clear he hadn’t planned what he wanted to say before catching your focus, so an awkward silence settles over him, eyes on you but focused somewhere off behind you like he’s looking through you instead. you tilt your head, lean in close, which snaps him out of the trance and he restarts. “right, ideas for events. i have a binder from the last social chair of my frat with a bunch of things he did during his time.”

“oh! i do, too!” you interject. “there’s a bunch of stuff that the last girl did and then things some of the girls before her did too.”

heeseung’s grin breaks back across his face, bright and warm; you swear, a smile from this boy alone could break up the threatening winter storm currently hanging over campus. “there’s a bunch of good ideas in mine. but i’m not quite sure how well they’d work right now because of the weather.”

“are most of the ideas outside?” you inquire, taking a sip of your soda while he confirms your suspicions. when you put the cup back down, you wave off his concern. “no worries then. almost all of mine are ones that can be inside, so we could go through those if you want!”

heeseung nods and smiles that morning sunlight smile of his, and you can’t move quick enough to pull the thin pink binder out of your tote bag. he clears away some of the trash from the table so you can lay out the binder, intro page on full display. for the next five minutes, the pair of you pore over the pages upon pages of ideas, sleek white cut through with black ink that lists the idea, the locations, how much it costs. 

you’re so invested in going over everything with him that you hardly acknowledge when heeseung stands and moves into the open seat beside you so neither one of you is craning your neck. you simply adjust the binder so you can read through the pages comfortably. it isn’t until heeseung points one out excitedly and you look up in startle that you finally notice that he isn’t a foot away but inches, noses just centimeters apart.

right now, this is the most compromising position you could possibly be in with a boy you hardly know and you find yourself praying that nobody from either of your chapters decides to walk by. of course, neither of you have anything to hide – this is a simple brainstorming session, of course, absolutely nothing more – but liv and your small group of friends would never let you live this down if they saw it.

heeseung clears his throat after seconds that stretch into years and you break your gaze from his painfully (how can you be blamed for staring? he’s that soft kind of pretty that hypnotizes). “um… so i think rollerskating could be fun…”

it is a good event that your sorority has done with the other frats and sororities in the past, one that you were playing around with as a potential plan to pitch to him. the fact that he picked it out on his own accord makes you bristle with something akin to pride, a feeling so warm and comforting it has you leaning just a little closer to him.

let the girls see me, you think as your sweater-clad shoulder brushes against his own. there are worse things they could catch me doing.

“actually… this was one of the ones i was going to suggest if you didn’t find any that you were really interested in…” you say quietly, voice nearly lost in the din of the dining area of the student union.

heeseung looks at you, blinking slow and round and soft, as if each flutter of his eyelids is a moment of his brain processing your words. “really… maybe it’s a sign…?”

his voice is just as soft, matching your energy in one swift go. you wonder if he’s thinking the same thing as you, if he’s feeling that it seems like you’ve known one another forever despite only knowing each other for fifteen minutes max; it seems like your souls themselves are in complete synergy, so why would it be so farfetched to wonder if maybe you knew each other in a different life to have caused that synchrony?

you laugh a little and shrug, shoulder brushing against his softly; the movement is short and sweet, but your heart rises in you like the high tide, washing through your veins with foam and salt and the kind of breeze only the ocean can bring, chill and warm all at once. “maybe so.”

silence settles over the table like sand stirred on the ocean floor, the both of you lost in your own worlds. heeseung has dragged his soda to this side of the table and sips absentmindedly, gaze focused miles beyond the horizon of the hallway. he’s completely checked out when your consciousness wanders back into your body and you take the moment to study him a little: the even slope of his nose, high cheekbones paired with plush skin, long eyelashes that brush the apex of his cheeks when he blinks, a flutter of dark against light. 

there are worse boys you could be caught staring at.

you’re still thinking about your lunch with heeseung hours later, even when you’re out getting your weekly tuesday night ice cream with your big. liv is going on about how her professor for her linguistics class pissed her off during lecture today, but you’re not absorbing a single word of any of it. you remember vaguely that he openly disagreed with her during the lecture and they got into a debate in front of the whole class, but beyond that, you don’t know much else.

“god, he’s just the worst. i can’t believe– alright, you’re in the stratosphere right now. what’s going on?”

you snap back to reality, eyes wide and goosebumps prickling up under the sleeves of your sweater. you shake your head, trying to brush away the conversation she’s trying to prompt, even though it’ll be futile because liv can’t let things go for the life of her. “nothing! everything’s fine, i swear.”

liv’s eyes narrow and a single dark eyebrow quirks up. “yeah, i’m not buying it.”

you glare playfully at her, eating a spoonful of chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream. when you swallow, you answer with a pointed, “when do you buy anything i say? really, liv. it’s nothing.”

“did someone say something to you? i’m part of panhellenic and on the all-greek council. if someone did something, i can handle it.”

you shake your head earnestly and wave a hand for extra emphasis. “olivia. seriously. nothing happened.”

your big is silent for a few moments, studying you intently. her shady blue eyes, usually wistful and giving the impression of being miles away herself, cut right down to your very bone, as if she’ll find the answer she’s looking for written into your skin or soul, carved into your heart. eventually, she sighs and slumps back against the booth.

“alright, fine. i’ll believe you this time,” she says in a voice that hints at disappointment. “but you’d tell me if someone did say something to you, right? i’m serious about getting things taken care of if someone does something like that to you.”

you smile, reach across the table, rest your hand over her. “yes, liv. i would tell you if somebody treated me badly. you’re the only friend i have who would be willing to go to jail if needed. but i promise the situation doesn’t call for that right now.”

she perks up a little at your words and takes a deep breath, nodding. she’s back to her bubbly self, resuming her rant about her asshole linguistics professor who definitely shouldn’t have tenure. the whiplash her behavior gives you definitely just secured her an award for “most melodramatic” at formal in april (which, fuck you have to start planning that soon too).

you remain checked into liv’s rant, assenting when she asks you for your opinions on this professor who you’ve never met and never plan on meeting, and offering advice when she wants it. but you still find yourself wandering off at times, mind focused on heeseung.

you’re not sure why you don’t want to tell her about meeting with the boy earlier; she’s one of his friends and she’s always spoken so highly about him, so you shouldn’t feel embarrassed. in fact, she’s mentioned in passing a couple of times (mostly when she’s undeniably hammered) that she thinks you and heeseung would make a cute couple, even though she’s never seen the two of you interact, let alone exist in the same room.

but there’s something special about the thirty minutes you shared with heeseung. you met in a public place, sure, but something about it felt and still feels so sacred to you. it’s something you want to keep a secret for at least a little while. that soft sunshine smile and the low tide brushes of shoulders are things that, for now, belong solely to you and heeseung. it won’t kill liv to be left out of the loop for a while.

“do you think we should have it closer to midterms?” heeseung’s voice is pure static, like he’s going through a tunnel, even though there’s only half a campus worth of distance between you.

the two of you have graduated from groupme dms to phone calls over the course of three days. heeseung is saved affectionately in your phone as sseung with the deer emoji, one that you picked out as he sat across from you after you’d exchanged numbers; he doesn’t know about it, but he reminds you often of a deer caught in headlights with the way he stares at you all wide-eyed when you try to catch his attention.

“maybe? but people have to study. i’m not sure how often your guys are in the library, but i see at least thirty girls at the library every single night, so i’m not sure how willing they’d be to give up a night of studying, even if it is only for an hour, that close to midterms.”

heeseung’s small, thoughtful hmm is audible over the speaker and you smile to yourself over a basket of clean laundry. you’ve spent maybe three hours max with him over the last couple of days and already you have a pretty decent grasp on his personality and habits. right now, you can picture the way he likely looks up from his phone or planner and stares off past the beige cinderblock wall of his dorm room, turning possibilities over in his head.

“no, you’re right about that. i didn’t even consider it.”

you shrug as though he can see you, folding a pair of sweats and setting them to the side. “i’d definitely like for it to be soonish though. it doesn’t have to be planned super far in advance, you know what i mean? we’ve still got… what? a month until midterms?”

“i think so, yeah.”

you nod to yourself, hanging up one of your shirts. “okay, so what about two weeks from now? that lands us right in between now and midterms, so it’d be a happy medium.”

he’s silent on the other end of the line and you pause in your hanging of another shirt, worried that he’s thinking you’re stupid. of course, heeseung would never think anything like that about anyone because he’s the sweetheart to end all sweethearts. still, you worry because what this boy thinks of you is ridiculously imperative to your day to day functions.

three days, you remind yourself. you’ve known him for three days. there’s no reason for his opinions to hold this much weight.

you wonder if heeseung knows just how easy it is to like him, to be around him; if he knows just how much you want to see him all the time because he’s completely taken over your every waking thought. liv’s comments about him made in passing never could have truly captured just how amazing he is, nice and caring and so so pretty. you’re almost embarrassed to be this head over heels for him, but when he laughs over the phone or focuses all of his attention on you over a table in the food court, that mortification burns away into something soft and sweet and slow.

“i think that’s a great idea. not too soon, so we can make sure our chapters know it’s happening, but not too late that it disrupts any midterm studying.”

you breathe a sigh of relief and smile to yourself, resting your hands against the lip of the laundry basket. the rational part of your brain knew he was going to agree, but the part of you that so desperately craves his approval was disgustingly terrified that you wouldn’t receive it. now that you have, though, a heat rushes through you, pride warm and bright because you offered a good solution to the minuscule obstacle.

“yeah, exactly!”

you can just imagine the grin on heeseung’s face right now, delicate like freshly fallen snow. the image fills you with the giddiness of a high school girl, glad to be the one to have caused such a beautiful sight. “okay, cool. i’ll talk about it with the executive board, get it approved and whatnot, but i think we should be set, besides who’s paying for what.”

“what do you mean?” you question, brows furrowing as you finish up the last of your laundry.

“what do you mean?” there’s a playful, teasing edge in his voice. “someone has to pay to book the rink and the shoes, and don’t you think there should be snacks?”

“oh… yeah, i guess so.”

“so i was thinking we’d cover the booking and you could cover the food… but only if you’re cool with that! obviously, it’s not a big deal or anything, but i figured we should get that in order too so we can a specific date set and everything.”

“no, no! that works fine for me! i honestly hadn’t thought that far ahead, so it’s a good thing you did.” the line falls silent for a few moments, static crackling softly between you. there’s just something about the idea that you’re so close yet so far from each other, physically distant but holding each other close like this over a quiet cellphone line. it’s comforting to have him like this, you find.

“but yeah…” you break the stillness with your voice soft so as to not completely shatter the tranquility you’ve cultivated here. “that’s… that’s good thinking, heeseung.”

“hanks…” his own words mimic the same volume, nearly lost in the haze of the phone. “so… i’ll run it by the exec board and let you know?”

you hum a quick mhmm and tell him that you’ll do the same. there should be no reason that you’ll be denied, but the fact that liv, seeing as she’s vice president of programming, is part of the exec board and will find out that you’ve been, at the very least, talking to heeseung on a semi-regular basis (see: every day this week since tuesday afternoon) is a little nerve wracking, mostly because you’re ninety-nine percent sure she’s been hinting at trying to set the two of you up.

and when you say hinting, you mean pointing him out on campus or at parties and saying something like “really, i think you two would get along so well! you should go and talk to him.”

she was right about that, but the last thing you need right now is her finding out that you are catching feelings, all without her meddling. but you’ll make peace with the fact because you have to.

liv sidles up to you two weeks later on a thursday night, knit-clad arms crossed over her chest. you don’t even have to look at her to know she’s wearing a smug expression right now. “so…”

you don’t even physically react to her presence, instead choosing to gaze out over the rollerskating rink in your little college town. “so… what, liv?”

she nudges you with her shoulder and leans with her back against the wall separating the rink floor from the carpet of the sitting area. “you and heeseung, huh? i’ve been telling you for ages that the two of you would get along!”

you scoff playfully and roll your eyes, finally turning your head to look at her. “can you not start sentences like that?”

“like what?” she asks innocently.

“like heeseung and i have something going on. all we did was plan one runout together. we’ve only met, like, one time in person.”

you regret the words almost as soon as they leave the tip of your tongue because the second she hears the phrase “in person,” she’s already causing a scene. even though her voice is somewhat drowned out by the music blasting over the speakers, the absolute tenacity with which she gestures with her entire body draws more attention than it should. melodramatic as per usual.

“in person? when was this? and why was i not informed?” the questions liv asks a million times come out more like exclamations than anything else, too caught up in melodramatic distress to adjust the tone of her voice correctly.

you shrug absently, turning your head back towards the rink. heeseung is standing on the opposite side, talking to a few of the guys from his frat. he looks nice in his blue and green sweater and loose jeans, brown hair tousled from the winter breeze outside. “a couple weeks ago. and i didn’t tell you because it just wasn’t that important. we literally only had lunch just to talk about ideas for this.”

liv whines your name and stomps a foot like a child throwing a tantrum. “yeah, but i’m your big. i wanna know these things! and i’ve also been trying to set you two up forever! you didn’t think i’d want to know that you’d finally met him, even if it wasn’t because of anything i’d plan? my feelings are hurt.”

“first, this is exactly why one of the awards for formal this semester is going to be most over dramatic and exactly why you’re going to win,” you start, shaking your head and rolling your eyes. “second, i knew you would want to know, but i also knew this is how you’d react. i didn’t think you’d want to know about us setting up an event together, like… there’s no tea to spill or whatever. it’s just boring stuff. i don’t even know him that well.”

a bold-faced lie if you’ve ever told one; you know heeseung down to the cologne he puts on every morning. and maybe there was a little more to the event planning sessions. at least five times over the past two weeks, heeseung has approached you either in the food court or at the library, and taken the seat opposite of you to chat and study a bit. not to mention, you’ve texted every single day since the two of you officially met for the first time.

but again: nothing liv needs to know. heeseung, for now, is just your little secret. the conversations you’ve shared, the little details you know about him, the sweater he’d given you a few days ago when you’d gotten cold at the library and your own sweater had gotten soaking wet due to rain and your lack of an umbrella, those are your things, special and personal and entirely yours.

“ugh. the two of you are so boring,” liv moans dramatically, tipping her head back. “i hope you hang out more after this, but only if you tell me about it.”

you shrug and glance back across the rink. heeseung has shifted positions, his arms crossed over the railing and by some stroke of luck, he’s looking at you, looking otherworldly under the shifting blue and purple lights. he smiles softly, just a quick phantom of a grin, and the only think you can do is return it with that same gentleness and warmth.

“maybe,” you say, glancing over at liv and then back at heeseung. “i guess we’ll just have to see.”

a week later, you’re sitting in your dorm room on a friday night, finalizing edits for a midterm paper, when there’s a banging at your door fifteen minutes before ten.

“heyyy! let me innn!” liv’s voice is airy and slurred through the door, so you can already guess what she’s here for.

with a heavy sigh, you stand and make your way to the door, opening it and finding your big leaning against the wall on the opposite side of the hallway. she’s dressed in her usual party attire: ripped jeans, black tank top, dirty shoes reserved specifically for the sticky basement floors of frat houses. she’s holding a metal water bottle in her hands; you can only guess what she’s mixed in it tonight.

“what’s up, liv?” you ask, leaning your shoulder against the doorframe, even though you don’t need an answer. you hadn’t anticipated her being here, so you’re already decked out in your comfy night clothes, prepared for a night in only. 

“lambda is throwing a party and you’re going with me,” she says peppily, practically jumping up and throwing herself into your room.

“liv-“

she whips around on her heels to face you, eyes glowing in the soft gold of your fairy lights. “no fighting me on this. you’ve been working hard and you need a break. so you’re going to dress like the hot bitch you are and then we’re going to lambda.”

liv is rooted to the spot, though she sways a little on her feet, and makes it known without words that she is not moving until you get ready for this dumb frat party. eager to get her drunken glare off of you, you sigh and nod, closing the door behind you, shutting off your desk light, and moving towards your wardrobe, rifling through the hangers to find a proper outfit.

you’ve been to lambda rho’s house before and it is nothing to write home about… unless, of course, you’re talking about how absolutely filthy the basement is; they have the best sized basement out of all of the frats on campus, but you swear they have never done anything to clean the floor. the first time you went, you’d been having a great time drinking well-mixed jungle juice and dancing to the best songs of the 2010s when you noticed that every step you took sounded like velcro. the floor was so sticky that you were literally having to put pressure behind pulling your shoes from the concrete. it totally killed the vibe.

but the jungle juice and occasional jello shots are great, so you persevere. besides, lambda throws the best parties on campus and you’re clearly the person to trust on party hot takes since you only go back to frats you have a good time at (sorry, sigma pi).

plus, heeseung is in lambda rho and he has to be there since he’s the social chair and all, so… you note that out of the maybe five parties you’ve been to there since the beginning of the school year, you’ve never once seen him. granted, he’s only required to be at any parties hosted while he’s the social chairman, so maybe he just didn’t go to any last semester. or maybe he’s a wallflower like you, choosing to stand on the outskirts instead of in the center of attention.

lost in your haze of heeseung thoughts, you don’t really register that you’ve finished dressing and that liv has sat you down at your desk to fix your hair. somehow, while very much drunk, your big has an easy time styling it. she’s focused intensely on the task at hand, but also manages to carry on a one-sided conversation, not realizing that you’re not responding to her. but when she moves her hands from your head and sets them on the back of your chair, you’re amazed; she’s always been good at styling and fashion (hence why she’s been in charge of the homecoming student org dance and cheer competition every fall for the last two years), but you weren’t expecting her skills to be up to par while buzzed to hell and back.

“there we go, ready to wow heeseung,” liv says matter-of-factly, a proud look on her face. when you glare at her through the mirror, she smiles and shrugs lazily, reaching to grab her water bottle and phone from your desk. “what? he’ll be there tonight and i’ve heard through the grape vine that he might have a little crush on you, so…”

you whip around at her words, hands braced against the back of your chair. something like liquid anxiety prickles under your skin, sending goosebumps across your arms. liv is friends with just about everyone in greek life, so “the grape vine” could quite literally mean anybody, but who did she find that out from anyways? when did heeseung say anything like that? did he even actually say that or is she just deadset on shipping the two of you together until it either happens or falls through?

“what?”

she looks back at you over her shoulder, one hand resting on the doorknob and your dorm keys in the other. there’s a mischievous glint in her dark eyes and your heart drops; how did you get such a schemer as a big? “oh, yeah. i was hanging out at the lambda house the other night with yeonjun. you know? heeseung’s big? and he maybe mentioned something about it. why do you wanna know?”

she sidles back up to you, pulling you out of the chair by your shoulders. “do you maybe… i don’t know… like him back? why are you so nervous?”

you shake your head, trying to will the goosebumps on your arms and lightning in your veins away. you’ve claimed a million times over the last few weeks that there is nothing more going on between you and that boy, no matter how pretty or sweet you might think he is. heeseung is just a friend, someone you just so happened to click really well with and just so happened to plan a really fun event with. there’s nothing else to say about it or the way you get excited when his name shows up on your phone or how your day immediately gets better when he walks up to you at the library without texting you first, your favorite snack and coffee in hand and a smile on his face.

there’s nothing there to unpack. you think.

“i’m not nervous. and i bet yeonjun just misheard heeseung. the two of us are just friends. i’ve told you that a million times and i’m sure he’s said the same thing.”

liv just laughs and ushers you towards the door. “okay, okay… sure, sweetheart. let’s get over there before they run out of alcohol.”

jay, the self-appointed dj for every lambda rho party, is blasting year 3000 by the jonas brothers when you and liv arrive in the basement. there’s already a large group of bodies on the dance floor, but the bar area is still pretty crowded and getting worse. liv links her arm with yours so that you won’t get separated, even though there’s no chance of you getting lost or anything.

the two of you make your way towards the bar where yeonjun is “bartending,” a term he insists on using despite the fact that all he does is pour cups of vibrant red jungle juice. blonde hair hangs over his forehead and his skin is glistening with sweat already, looking weirdly ethereal under the colorful lights that fill the room. when he sets eyes on you and liv, he smiles brightly and leans against the bartop.

“hey, you two! glad you finally showed up!” he shouts over the music. “jungle juice?”

liv nods enthusiastically, mimicking his posture and crossing her arms on top of the counter. “yes please! any chances you have jello shots tonight too?”

the boy looks around before he leans in closer to answer. “don’t tell anyone else, but i made some just for you two since you’re my favorite customers.”

liv rolls her eyes and swats at his bicep, but she’s smiling anyways. “we’re not customers, jun. you’re not even getting paid to do this. when are you gonna stop acting like you’re a real bartender, huh?”

he clenches his hand over his heart and stumbles backwards, feigning pain. “you wound me so, liv. i did something nice for you and this is how you repay me. i can’t believe this!”

but in the midst of his monologue, he bends over to open a mini fridge behind the bar and returns with a couple of jello shots. he tells you to take them here while he gets your drinks and hide them the best you can so nobody gets up in arms that he’s providing something outside of the night’s menu. he’s always been especially nice to you, mostly because of liv and his undying love for her (though platonic or romantic, you’ve never been exactly sure about), so it’s all you can do to thank him and listen to his pleads for secrecy regarding the contraband jello shots. when he’s back above bar, you switch off, him discreetly tossing the small cups in the trash.

liv, finally armed with her precious red solo cup, turns to talk to some other friends, leaving you and yeonjun alone. the music is so loud you can hardly keep your thoughts straight, which is great for keeping your mind off of what liv said earlier, but doesn’t last long when yeonjun leans in ever closer, his cologne enveloping you entirely.

“you should thank heeseung for the jello shots, by the way. i honestly hadn’t even thought to make some for you and liv because i was busy with other stuff, but he asked about making some since he knows they’re your favorite.”

your heart clenches a little at the idea that heeseung wanted to make sure that you had things you liked at his frat’s party. it’s nice to have someone looking out for small things like that, even if it means breaking a rule or two. yeonjun rests his hand on top of your head and pats gently, a knowing look in his eyes.

“listen, i know that you swear up and down the wall that you and him are just friends, but for what it’s worth, he likes you a lot. he just won’t say it. you know him. he’s kinda bad with words. it’s not really my place to make his confession for him, but just… you know. give him a chance.”

you nod dumbly and give him a half-baked smile when he pulls his hand off your head. a few girls walk up, vying for their own drinks, so you take that as your cue to walk away, red solo cup cradled in your hands. any hope of not thinking about heeseung lee has been completely undone by both liv and yeonjun. 

suddenly, you are far too sober.

two hours later, you’re five drinks in, only kept track of by the cups you have in your hand, and you’re feeling pleasantly buzzed. the lights are a little brighter, the music a little louder, liv’s arm hot and grounding around your shoulders. she’s completely gone, despite the fact that she’s only had three cups of jungle juice. she’s serenading you with dancing queen by abba, somehow getting every single word wrong. 

“fuck, i’m way too drunk for this,” she says, breaking off a line in the middle of the second verse. “i’ll sing for you next time. promise.”

you laugh and lean against her, shaking your head. “okay, livvie. sounds good.” you’re content to end your sentence there, but you have an increasing awareness of how hot it’s gotten. the amount of people packed into the basement, especially in the center of the dancefloor like this, has contributed greatly to the heat and you need some time to cool down before it makes you sick. “listen, ‘m gonna get some air. ‘t’s getting really hot.”

liv nods and hugs you to her, voice chipper but slurred heavily. “‘kay! i’ll see you in a few.” she lets you go and breaks out into the next song, somehow worse than dancing queen.

you slip out of the crowd, already feeling a little cooler now that you’ve escaped from the hot press of bodies. standing on the outskirts of the dancefloor, you consider your options. there’s the open window that a cool breeze passes through or the door by yeonjun’s bar, which you know leads directly outside with a staircase up to the back deck. while you initially planned to be within arm’s reach for liv’s sake, your ears are starting to ring from the loud music and the choice is made for you.

you wave to yeonjun as you make your way towards the door. he pauses and leans over to ask you if you’re leaving, looking a little concerned, but you shake your head and tell him what you told liv. and then you tack on the information that she’s incredibly drunk, so he should watch out for her because knowing her, she’ll be tapping out sooner rather than later. he nods in understanding and lets you go, turning back to the two frat guys, jake and chan, that are standing at the bar.

the temperature difference between the basement and outside right now is jarring, but welcomed nonetheless. you carefully traverse the stairs, not quite confident in yourself to take them confidently, seeing as your sight is currently swimming a little and your head is light. getting to the top is a feat and you feel immediately better once you’re on the back deck.

you’re so out of it that you don’t realize you aren’t alone as you lean against the railing, reveling in the way the wood digs into your forearms and the chill bites at you through the sheer long sleeves of your black shirt. you’re still very much buzzed, but you feel a little more clear-headed now that you can hear yourself think.

the sound of your name startles you and you swear you jump ten feet in the air before you whip around, hand against your heart. heeseung is halfway out the back door, a cup in his hand and that deer caught in the headlights expression you’ve come to know well over the last month or so. 

“jesus, heeseung. you scared the shit out of me!” you say, catching your breath and leaning back against the railing.

“i’m sorry! i didn’t mean to!” he finishes stepping out of the house and onto the deck with you, the door swinging shut behind him. he’s so earnest in his apology that you can’t help but smile, dropping your hand and instead taking a sip from your drink that you carried out here with you.

“you have a habit of sneaking up on me, huh?”

he joins you at the railing, leaning against it the way you are, and raises his own cup to his lips (perfect and plush and pink… enough of that). he shrugs as he drinks, wincing when it goes down rougher than he expected. the liquid that sloshes against the side is not the same color as yours, so you can only assume that one of the guys gave him something a little stronger than whatever they threw together for the jungle juice.

“i guess so,” he says through a small cough. “i don’t mean to, if that makes it any better.”

you laugh a little, nudging him with your shoulder. “it’s not a big deal, if that makes you feel better. i think it’s kinda funny.”

heeseung smiles at that and nods, keeping his eyes trained on the drink in his cup. it’s only when you’re committing his side profile to drunken memory that you realize the blush that’s crept up the back of his neck onto his cheeks and the tip of his ears. except, that sober voice inside your head argues it could just be from the cold. 

but neither of you have been out long enough for that to be the case. it’s not even that cold out here, just a little bit chilly. drunk you is having sneaking suspicions, ones that sober you would never entertain, and this is the first time you’re seeing heeseung at one of his frat’s parties, so you might as well take advantage of it all as much as you can.

“yeonjun told me what you did… the jello shots for me and liv, i mean,” you clarify the second you realize how the first sentence sounds without context. “thanks. i didn’t think you were really paying attention to that kind of stuff.”

heeseung turns his head to look at you, eyes a little wide but that soft, perfect smile offsets it nicely. he looks a little surprised that you found out about it, but not upset that yeonjun mentioned it.

“well… i mean, of course i do. that’s kinda… what i do, you know?”

he’s beating around the bush. yeonjun was right; heeseung never talks about his feelings and he sure as hell won’t offer you the words you’re waiting to hear right now. so, drunk you reasons, why is the only way to confess through words? he’s shown you how much he cares, he’s been doing it for weeks now. maybe you were suppressing your own feelings to keep liv off your back about it all, but in doing so, you’ve been diminishing heeseung’s own attempts at telling you. 

this whole thing with him has never been simply friends. love at first sight feels a little much, but you certainly have something between you and you have for weeks on end at this point. maybe it’s time to reward this beautiful boy for being so patient with you.

just as he’s beginning to turn his head away to look back towards the house, you set your cup on the railing and capture his face in your hands. there’s no moment for either of you to process what’s happening, just that one minute there’s a platonic amount of distance between you and the next, your lips are on his and it is warm and unpracticed and still unbelievably perfect. heeseung goes pliant and soft under your touch, his free hand resting gently on the small of your back. his fingers curl gently into your shirt, tethering himself to you. his other hand is still grasping his solo cup and you find yourself wishing he’d just drop the damn thing, even if it means the both of your shoes get soaked in whatever he’d been served (whiskey, you’d guess, from the smokey taste on his tongue).

he’s the first to pull away, eyes still closed for moments after. his breaths come shallow and his cheeks have gone impossibly red, his hand still against your back. you study him from this angle, closer than you’ve ever been, and somehow, you’re finding him prettier than ever before. maybe it’s the alcohol talking or the sudden lovesickness for him, but you don’t care because you finally kissed heeseung lee and left him breathless.

“what- um… what was that for?” he asks quietly, eyes fluttering open. his pupils are blown wide and awestruck (you think that’s the right word in your jungle juice induced haze).

you shrug, inching yourself a little closer towards him. he turns to meet you so your bodies run parallel to each other and finally sets his offending cup on the railing next to yours. “got tired waiting for you t’make a move.”

he makes a sound in the back of his throat and turns his head to look elsewhere, as if looking at you might make him drop dead. any doubt you had from earlier in the night that he’d told yeonjun that he liked you is swept away in a single moment; he can deny it all he wants now, but you already know the truth, so what’s the point?

“liv told me that she heard through the grape vine that you liked me…” you say softly, voice trailing off into the muffled sounds of a kesha song blasting in the basement. “is that… true?”

you watch as he draws a deep breath, squeezes his eyes closed, steels himself for whatever answer he’s about to give. with all your liquid courage now, confessing might not have been a big deal, but you know that if you’d been sober, it would be just as hard as this. but you swear you saw him drinking jungle juice down in the basement an hour and a half ago, and now he’s drinking something stronger, so he must be so naturally shy that not even alcohol can wipe it out.

finally, he lets his breath out and focuses his attention on you again, his eyes soft and pleading. don’t break my heart. please.

“yeah… yeah, i got a little drunk last weekend and told yeonjun that i thought i had feelings for you when he got me back to my dorm. i’m sorry if that makes you uncomfortable or if it ruins our friendship. i j–”

you kiss him again, hot and heavy and full of longing and words you don’t dare voice because you’ve liked him for a long time too; you were just too afraid to admit it to yourself. but now he’s spilling his heart out and you’d rather walk barefoot through broken glass before you let him go on thinking for a second longer that his feelings aren’t reciprocated tenfold.

you step impossibly closer, your bodies pressed tight and heavy, the seam unbreakable. heeseung’s hands (both thank god) rest on your waist, holding you close. he bristles under your touch as you leave one hand on his shoulder and the other sneaks around to the nape of his neck, fingers curling into the fine, soft hair there. your nails scratch lightly against his scalp and his chest shudders against yours, some small, refined gasp of approval passing from his mouth to yours as he takes his turn to kiss the breath out of you.

it’s a tiny noise, barely noticeable, barely passing as a soft breathy moan. but you hear it and it’s embarrassingly enough to have your knees going a little weak. well, it’s not just that minuscule noise; it’s everything, it’s the way heeseung’s lips move against your own with an uncharacteristic amount of surety, the way his fingers have slipped under your shimmery black top (a “donation” from liv’s closet last homecoming), the way you can feel his body coming alive under your attention. if this is going where you think it’s going, the dreams you’ve been having about him at least once a week since you first met are about to come true.

heeseung is the first to break away again, but he looks less nervous than the first time. no, this time he looks flushed and tousled and so attractive it should be illegal. when he shifts his weight from his left to right foot, his body brushes against you and the heat of him is unmistakable. even if you couldn’t feel it, you can see the way his eyelids flutter and feel the way his chest shudders against yours. you can’t help yourself; you need him.

“come back to my dorm,” you whisper breathlessly, words manifesting physically in a cloud of fog. “please.”

the boy squeezes his eyes shut again, looks up towards the sky, draws that deep breath he’s so fond of right now. you almost back out, almost say it was a joke; he just confessed his feelings and you kissed twice, so maybe it’s all a little much for him. you really like him and you don’t want to scare him off; besides, what you’re feeling right now is nothing you can’t take care of on your own back in your dorm room. just as you’re about to tell him that he can say no, he’s seemingly talked himself up enough because he looks down at you, smiles, kisses you on his own accord, and then takes your hand.

“lead the way,” he says.

you and heeseung stop at least five times on the way back to your dorm room to makeout, giggling into each other’s mouths as he presses you against a tree on the greens or as you pull him into the pools of darkness between streetlamps. every moment has him growing more confident, more certain that this isn’t just a hookup or a dream.

somewhere along the way, you text liv and tell her that you’re heading home because you’re not feeling well. it’s not farfetched, seeing as you’d broken away from her in the first place because you were feeling too hot. what happened between your departure and when the text is sent is entirely irrelevant right now. what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her and she’ll hear about it sooner rather than later anyways. 

it takes you maybe a full twenty minutes to reach your building, a feat considering how drunk you are and how obsessed you’ve been with heeseung for the last half hour. you fully expected it to take longer, but now, you stand under the golden glow of the entry to your dorm building, heeseung unlocking the door for you because you’re a little too gone right now and unwilling to take your hands off him,standing next to him, your arms hugging his free one while you lean your cheek against his shoulder. he fumbles with the key, muttering about how they should change to a keycard system instead, but he gets it eventually and you’re in.

after that, it’s practically a mad dash up to your dorm room on the third floor. your hand is twined tight around heeseung’s as you lead him up the stairs, too impatient to take the elevator right now. somewhere in the back of your mind, you’re glad that you took the time to clean your room today after class; heeseung will see a polished side of you, one that puts laundry away as soon as they’re out of the dryer, one that has glowing golden fairy lights above the window that gild your room in warmth, one that leaves books and binders stacked neatly in the shelf on your desk. not that he’ll be paying attention to any of it anyways, what with the way you can feel his cock pressing incessantly against you as you unlock your bedroom door, hot and straining.

agonizing seconds stretch into what feels like even more agonizing hours, but eventually, you get the door unlocked and guide him inside, stepping into the glow of your string lights that you’d left on before you left. you don’t even have to turn yourself around to look at him because he does it for you, turning you by your waist, pressing you fast against the back of the now-closed door.

his mouth is on yours in an instant, tongue swiping over your bottom lip, no doubt tasting the fruit punch yeonjun had added to tonight’s jungle juice recipe concoction. his hands are on your waist, curling hot into your skin, black mesh of your shirt scratching against you. it’s nice, how respectful he’s being right now, still ever the gentleman he’s been for the last month, but you don’t want nice and respectful right now. you’ve had literal dreams about this since you met him, driving your attraction to him higher with every one; you want mean and messy and rough, and that’s what you’ll get if it’s the last thing you do.

so in a bid to urge him towards where you’re really hoping this night goes, you grab at one of his wrists and drag his hand up to your chest, pressing his palm against your breast. you can feel his breath hitch against you and you smile into the kiss because how can he still be so shy when he’s kissed the breath out of you at least five times in the last forty-five minutes? either way, he gives a tentative squeeze and it feels mind blowingly good; you’ve never been one to really care much about attention focused on your tits, but heeseung makes it feel like maybe you should.

you get lost in the feeling of his lips on yours, one of his hands kneading at your chest, the other slowly slipping under your top, rough fingertips drawing up and down the skin of your stomach, so far gone that you don’t notice the thigh he’s slotted between your legs until he grinds it up against you. it’s sudden and so well-earned, some much needed friction that you’ve been craving since that second kiss on the deck in lambda rho’s backyard. he does it a second time, the hard plane of his thigh coming up hard against your clit, and your knees buckle a little, dropping you further onto him. you moan sweetly into his mouth, tilting your head back against the door as the hand on your waist works your hips against him with a scary but uncharacteristic practiced certainty. he takes the absence of your mouth against his to trail kisses on your neck, his teeth dragging along the sensitive skin, nipping and leaving love bites in his wake.

a well aimed grind of your hips, guided singularly by the boy in front of you, has you falling forward against his chest, your forehead pressed into the junction between his shoulder and neck. you keen against him in frustration, the crest rising but not breaking, no matter how hard to try to get it to.

“seung,” you cry against his skin, fingers curling tight into his sweater. “need more please.”

you almost sob in relief when you feel him nod against your neck, more so when you notice his own hips are stuttering against your leg that is bracketed by his. it’s enough to make you moan, the idea of him needing it just as much as you that he’s trying to hold himself back from getting off on your thigh too.

pressing your palms flat against his chest, you guide heeseung backwards in the direction of your bed (which you’re very suddenly glad you haven’t lofted). when the back of his knees hit the edge of the mattress, he makes quick work of kicking his shoes off and then scrambling up so that his back rests against the wall. you follow suit, toeing off your party shoes and crawling onto his lap where he’s waiting patiently, his eyes wide and the browns of his eyes drowned out by his pupils. he’s breathing hard, chest heaving.

he looks up at you as you situate yourself, his hands coming to rest on your waist again. the expression on his face is nothing short of worshipful, like you’re a deity here to wrench your well-earned respect from his hands. and he is clearly ready to hand it over without a single fight. he guides you down onto him and you follow his hands willingly, your thighs straddling his and your clothed cunt just barely grazing against his hard-on until you settle down completely in his lap, not a centimeter of distance between you. the friction and pressure have both of you gasping wordlessly and heeseung tugs desperately at your hips. you fall into him, arms around his neck and pulling him to meet you halfway, lips locked once more. you give a tentative roll of your hips and heeseung moans into your mouth, just the reaction you were anticipating.

“fuck,” he moans the second time you do it. “you’re so good.”

you’re already hot, seared through to the bone, but you feel yourself go even warmer under heeseung’s praise. you’ve imagined this a million times over the last few weeks, but nothing could ever compare to the real thing. you kiss him harder, breathe him in deep to prove to yourself that this is real, that heeseung lee is under you right now, bucking his hips up into you and matching your movements, about to make you come just from a little bit of dry humping. it would be embarrassing if you weren’t both half-gone and ridiculously desperate.

you continue to rut against him, panting hot and heavy into his mouth as he swallows every single moan and whimper you let out just to return them tenfold, his hands working you over him with a rushed ease. every roll of your hips is met with his own presses upwards. he’s working you higher and higher with each move, closer to the precipice, and while you’ve never before thought you’d find yourself in a position like this, if heeseung makes you come without taking a single item of clothing off either of you, then so be it.

as if he’s read your thoughts, he presses you back and away from him. you open your eyes for the first time in minutes and take him in: messy hair, flushed cheeks, bruised lips. no wet dream could have ever prepared you for how beautiful he looks right now.

but no matter how pretty you think he is in this moment, the sudden absence of friction has you whining loudly, pitched high and tight. when you speak, your voice trembles out of frustration. “heeseung, why’d you stop?”

he sucks in a breath and moves to push at your shoulders some more. “don’t- fuck- don’t wanna come yet, not like this.”

if you weren’t already so fucked out, you would have giggled, but right now, you just feel exasperated. he’s right; you don’t want to come like this either, but you’d also come to terms with it because it would mean that you would at least be getting the release you’re so desperately craving. and that’s been ripped away from you, at least for the moment. but when he looks up at you again, his eyebrows furrowed and eyes still wide with need, you fold immediately.

“tell me what you want.” he’s practically begging you and it sends a thrill through you, liquid lightning straight to your heart. “please.”

and how can you deny him when he’s asked you so sweetly or when you’re just as needy as he is? at this point, whatever he’d offer, you would take gladly. he’s gazing at you now, waiting anxiously for an answer, not that you have a set one; you want him in any way he wants you, nothing else matters more than that. but you take in his swollen lips and lithe fingers and your mind is off to the races.

“i-” you start, but stumble over your words. you’d been incredibly forward when you’d kissed him first, but you’ve lost all of that fire now. you can’t bring yourself to ask for what you want, even though you’re certain he’d do anything you’d ask of him.

“c’mon,” he coaxes, fingers kneading into your shoulders to ground you. “whatever you want.”

the sound of his voice is earnest, nothing short of honest, and it makes you want to trust him more than anything. so you do. you draw in a steadying breath and curl your hands into his sweater as you work yourself up to it.

“will you-” another breath. “would you eat me ou-”

“yes,” he immediately answers. you don’t even get a chance to finish the question. “fuck. i thought you’d never ask.”

he moves his hands to cup your face and pulls you into him, kissing you sweetly, his nose bumping against yours. the minuscule break in sexual tension, while in most situations would be a mood killer, is nice because it just further cements that this isn’t some random one night stand; you want to see him every day for the rest of your life after this, if he’ll let you.

somewhere between the kiss and when he breaks away from you, he’s maneuvered you so that you’re laying back against your pillows. you’ve also managed to discard your shirt (thank god, the glitter and mesh combo was starting to irritate your skin something fierce) and he’s working to get your pants off, fingers fumbling with the button; it’s as frustrating as it is adorable and he swats your hands out of the way when you reach down to help him, deadset on doing it himself, which he does manage (eventually, after a few incredibly long moments). you help him shimmy down your jeans and panties by lifting your hips a little and then you are inarguably bare in front of him, a position you’d never imagined you would be in.

and maybe heeseung is a little wonderstruck too because for a few long seconds, he sits there and stares at you in all your naked glory (or nearly naked glory, seeing as you haven’t taken your bra off yet, but he doesn’t seem to mind). you’re starting to get a little bashful and have to nudge him with a bent knee to pull him out of his stupor. he’s impossibly red at the tips of his ears as he murmurs a sweet apology that comes accompanied by a “you’re just so pretty.”

before you can muster a reply, he’s situating himself between your legs, hands pressing softly against your inner thighs to draw them apart, set eyes on his real destination. you lift your head just a little bit, watching as his eyes widen as he takes all of you in, his breath hot against your folds. his fingers curl tight into the soft skin of your thighs and you whimper at the sting, equally painful as it is exhilarating. he makes an indistinguishable groan in the back of his throat before he’s completely devouring you.

plenty of your wet dreams about the boy between your legs right now have included this very scenario: his nose bumping carelessly against your clit, a suddenly confident tongue making a show of licking up all of your arousal, your thighs already trembling. but they never could have prepared you for the actual thing because he’s giving you what is quite possibly the best head you’ve ever had.

heeseung is eating you out like a man starved, it’s absolutely obscene. his tongue works you up fast, every little moan he lets out only contributing. somewhere in the midst, he says something that sounds like “you taste s’good,” but his words are drowned out by your own moans and the sound of his mouth working you over. every pass of his tongue over your folds is as close as you’ve ever gotten to heaven, but you’re lacking something to really shove you over that precipice; and now you know heeseung is so whipped he’ll do anything you ask him to.

“seung,” you gasp out breathlessly, untangling one hand from your comforter so you can wind your fingers into his hair. he looks up at you, doe eyes big and wide and glimmering with his eyebrows drawn together, a questioning look without pulling away to speak. you’re about to ask him when his nose bumps hard against your terribly sensitive clit and your word breaks off before the first syllable can even leave your lips. “fuck— seung, can you— can you add your fingers?”

you’re not quite used to asking for what you want, at least verbally; maybe it’s because any previous partners weren’t keen on getting you to verbalize, maybe it’s because they never particularly cared and just did what they thought was good. but heeseung is pliant and willing to please in any way he can, so you feel less embarrassed this time around because he’s made it entirely clear that your pleasure is his main priority.

he doesn’t nod, doesn’t say anything, just closes his eyes again and goes back to work. you almost think he either didn’t hear you or is straight up ignoring you before you feel it. he pulls his hand from your right thigh slowly, letting his fingertips drag lightly against your skin; the menace is teasing you, where did that come from? but you don’t even have much time to internally complain about him holding out on you because he’s suddenly slipping two fingers into you, long, deft limbs that expertly seek out that spot inside you. he presses against it once, twice, three times, each one drawing out a whine from you.

it’s just what you need, the extra friction pushing you up that incline, closer and closer to the dropoff. when your back arches off the bed and your thighs close around his head, boxing him in against your pussy, heeseung knows he’s got you right where you want to be and then he doesn’t let up. it’s an onslaught of pressure, four different points of sensation, and you’re on the verge of tears. he’s making a complete mess of you, utilizing all he can to get you over that edge. you’re whining his name like it’s the only word you know, “yes” and “fuck” and “oh my god” getting lost in your slurred speech; he’d be evil incarnate if he denied you what you’re so beautifully begging for.

he presses incessantly at that spongy place inside you, nose bumping against your little bundle of nerves, moans growing more frequent, all while his tongue tries to catch every single drop of arousal. and then there you go, ecstasy taking over like liquid heat in your veins. his name sounds like pure euphoria on your tongue, mixed with your moans and whines. he thinks he could come just from this alone, your cum in his mouth and your thighs pressed tight around him, but he holds off because there’s only one place he wants to leave his release (if you’ll let him, that is).

“shit.” 

you sound fucked out, completely gone and heeseung swears he’s never heard anything sexier. you tug at his hair a little bit, feeling completely overstimulated but still so good, a shock to your system as he pulls his fingers out of you and lets his tongue work over you just a little bit longer (to make sure you’re clean, he reasons to himself). 

eventually, he does pull away and you have to fight the urge to whine again. his eyes are unfocused and glossed over, his chin practically dripping in your arousal. hell, his tongue darts out to get the last little bit of your cum at the corner of his lips and you nearly orgasm all over again.

“was it good?” he asks softly and you barely hold yourself back from laughing. he just made you come harder than any previous partner ever has, given you the best head in the world, and he’s asking you if it was good? he’s insane for thinking it was anything short of perfect.

but you don’t say that. you reach for his sweater, fingers curling tight into the cotton and tugging him down towards you. he catches himself by his hands, his arms bracketing you easily, before he completely crashes into you. there’s a long moment where he just stares down at you, lovestruck and pretty, before he lowers himself to kiss you. you can taste yourself on his lips, on his tongue, and you moan a little bit, feeling a little embarrassed, but one of his hands moves from its place on the mattress to cradle your cheek and that alone drives it away. 

one of your arms sneaks over his shoulder, your fingers tangling into the damp hair at the nape of his neck, while the other sneaks under his sweater, the shirt he wears underneath until the tips of your fingers brush the soft, pliant skin of his stomach. you can feel the gentle ridges of abs and a small piece of you shivers with giddiness. regardless, you enjoy a few seconds of running your fingers over his stomach before you push a little more incessantly at the offending pieces of material. he takes it for what it is: a plea to get rid of the clothes. after all, it’s not fair that you’re almost entirely undressed and he hasn’t taken a single article off.

you watch dazedly as heeseung sits back onto his heels, your eyes following his arms as he crosses them over himself, grasps at the hems, pulling them over his torso, his arms, his head before they land haphazardly on the floor next to your bed. every inch revealed to you makes your mouth water, his skin taut and soft and glowing in your fairy lights. you can’t help but remind yourself that dreams and an overactive imagination could never live up to the real thing because he’s very much the most beautiful person you’ve ever seen.

you’re entirely prepared to continue your makeout session, but heeseung seems to have other ideas because once his tops are discarded, he begins making work of his jeans. you make a soft noise in the back of your throat when you realize what he’s doing and he looks up at you, fingers stilling at his belt, his eyes wide.

“is something wrong?”

he sounds so sincere, it kind of makes you want to cry. but you shake your head earnestly, propping yourself up on your elbows so you can look at him better. “no, no! everything is fine. i guess i just wasn’t expecting you to take your pants off so soon.”

he quirks an eyebrow at you and dons that pretty little smile of his, teasing but not really. “well, you’re almost completely undressed. figured it was only right that i do the same, y’know?”

and you laugh a little because it’s true and because he’s just so cute, he laughs too, soft and quiet. you generally think sleeping with someone is fun, but you’ve never had as much fun as you are right now. maybe it’s because it’s with heeseung and you like him so much already, so the playfulness comes easy; it doesn’t feel tense the way it has with others.

so you watch him handle his belt, the button on his jeans, the zipper. you watch, mouth watering once more, as he slips out of them, leaving his boxers, which have a dark wet patch on them. the sight alone would make you groan, but you can see the outline of his cock and you almost lose it completely. so you decide to resume the impatient act because you are still very much so; as cute as the playful routine is, you haven’t forgotten the exhilarating rush of trying to get to your dorm as fast as possible and the unpracticed fumbling that’s followed since then.

you reach for him and he doesn’t hesitate, letting you pull him on top of you by his shoulders, fitting your mouths together in a messy kiss, all teeth and tongues. your hands are in his hair again, his own slide underneath you to make work of your bra, unclasping it and then pulling the straps away from your shoulders, down your arms, making you let go of him for a quick few seconds so that he can pull it off completely and toss it god knows where in your room.

you’re distantly aware that you’re entirely bare to him now, but his mouth is working at your throat, dragging his teeth along the sensitive skin of your neck (he is strangely good at distracting you, you’re learning), so you don’t feel as shy as you did just a handful of minutes ago. either way, he’s sucking hickies into your shoulders, your collarbones, any skin that has a little bit of give to it that lets him leave love bites in his wake. so lost in the haze, you realize a little too late that he’s working his way towards your chest, but it doesn’t even matter, not when he has one hand kneading at one and his mouth at the other, tracing lines over your skin to quell the sting of each pinch, each little nip of teeth. your nipples pebble under his attention and while this never usually does much for you, you still find yourself getting antsy because it’s heeseung. everything he’s done for weeks has gotten you worked up, why would that stop now?

it doesn’t help that he’s grinding against you, his hips canting against your own for any semblance of friction. your arousal is no doubt contributing to the wet patch on his boxers and the idea of it almost has your eyes rolling into the back of your head. his cock feels hot and heavy against your folds, the head bumping against your clit, and all of it feels so delicious that you let out a crisp, high whine, twining your fingers into heeseung’s soft hair and tugging gently.

he pulls himself away from your chest and when you look at him, you almost moan. his lips are swollen, slick with spit, and his gaze has gone misty. he looks at you expectantly, blinking slow and lips pouted as he waits. you’re not even sure what you want from him right now, at least nothing specific because you want everything from him. you’re about to tell him to go back to doing what he was originally because it did feel good, but then he lands a particularly well-timed grind against you and you’re gasping.

“fuck,” you whimper, tossing your head back a little. your fingers tighten in his hair and from somewhere south of you, he laughs a little, light and easy and airy.

“that what you want from me?” he questions, pulling himself up over you, catching your chin between his thumb and pointer finger. in any other situation, it might come off as intimidating and teasing, but heeseung is all doe-eyed and halfway to heaven right now, so it comes off more desperate to please than anything. either way, you nod. “all you had to do was ask. you know that.”

you nod and pull him down to kiss you by the fingers you have twisted in his hair. he groans against you, moving his hand from your chin to your jaw, angling you just so. somewhere in the kiss, you murmur a soft, “seung, i want you,” and he groans a little, nodding against you. he pulls away and you chase after him, but he’s sitting up, moving lightning quick to get his boxers off, abandoned somewhere on the linoleum floor with everything else.

and then it hits you that you’re both completely bare. you lean back on your elbows, looking him over once more, though your focus lingers mostly on the skin newly revealed to you. his thighs are toned and sturdy, the skin plush, and while you’d love to stare at them a little bit more, your attention is quickly drawn to his dick. it’s big, the head an agitated red and leaking precum, and your mouth is watering at the thought of getting him in your position and giving him the best head of his life.

you actually start to move to do so, but heeseung anticipates it and moves quick, pressing you back into your mattress. his dark doe eyes are drowning in desire and you shudder under his gaze. he’s on you again instead, hips melded to yours in your nth kiss tonight. he’s got his weight rested on one elbow beside your head while his other arm is free to move around, his hand tracing from your shoulder, your chest, smoothing across your stomach. 

his fingers eventually land on your thigh, curling into the soft inner flesh, and he hikes it up around his waist before dropping his hand to his cock. his lips trail from your lips to your neck and shoulders, nipping at the skin as he jerks himself off. you toss your head back against your pillows, whimpering at every little graze of his teeth against your skin. 

but what’s really driving you crazy is the heat of him against you. the head of his cock bumps against your clit, this time with no fabric barrier separating them, and you’re not sure if heeseung is even meaning for the touch, but it has you feeling hot all over again, slick leaking out of you again. you’re getting impatient, heel pressing hard into his lower back and your fingernails biting into the flesh of his biceps.

“heeseung,” you whine out, canting your hips up against his; you hear him suck in a breath through clenched teeth, a hiss of air. “need you.”

he shivers against you, a teary whimper of “need you too” granted in return as he pulls his face from your neck so that he can watch you as he finally gets to what you’ve wanted since this whole thing started. on a short teasing streak, he taps the head of his cock against your clit and you whine, turning your head into your pillow and curling your fingers into his arms, which earns a laugh.

“stop playing,” you tell him, rolling your hips upwards and into him.

he hisses again and bites at his bottom lip, nodding. he slips from your clit to your entrance and even just the little shred of pressure you get has you wanting to moan out for him. but then he starts pressing in all the way, slipping into your cunt with ease and you are not prepared for just how full you feel. your back arches and he lets off a tempered moan, stifled through a lip bite. when he bottoms out, his hips flush with your own, you release a breath as you adjust to the size of him, which doesn’t take long.

“seung,” you drawl, grabbing his attention. “move please.”

and he does as you bid, pulling out before he thrusts back in. it takes a few moments for him to find a pace that works, but when he does, it’s perfect. his hips roll against yours delectably, the sounds of skin meeting skin and your shared moans filling the small dorm room. he’s shored up over you, one elbow pressed deep into the thin mattress holding him up, and when your eyes aren’t squeezed tight in ecstasy, you watch the way he bites his lip, furrows his eyebrows, shudders as you clench around him.

“god, you’re s’tight. feels so good,” he whimpers at one point, his head hanging over your own as he tries to keep a steady pace. his words are shattered, breaking off in the middle or slurred together, a verbal manifestation of how you physically feel.

one thrust hits that just right spot inside you and you can’t hold but moan loudly, back arching off the mattress and your head pressing into your pillows. heeseung inhales sharply above you as you clench tight around him and then, with you still keening, you feel him sit up, taking his warmth with him. his hands are on your hips seconds later and he’s angling you, doing everything in his power to replicate it again and again.

“fuck, i’ve wanted this for so long,” he says, one hand on your thigh and the other working deft fingers on your clit. he’s a quick learner it seems because all of it is coming together to whisk your orgasm closer, a wave of white heat washing over you. “saw you at my frat’s halloween party ‘nd thought you were so pretty. woulda come up t’you that night if i knew you felt this good.”

your breath hitches more than it has all night and you cant your hips upwards in an attempt to meet his thrusts. somewhere in the midst of your pleasure, you tell him you’re going to come and he nods fast, fingers going into overtime to get you there. that knot inside you winds up tight and then snaps like a rubber band stretched too thin, hot and fast. your pussy locks around his cock and then he’s there above you, bracing himself with his hand, to swallow the particularly sharp whine of his name you let out and any stray too-loud moans that might slip away and wake the neighbors (as if you haven’t already).

when your vision finally clears and your thighs stop trembling, his hips are still snapping into yours to seek his own release, pushing you into the territory of overstimulation, but any pain you have bleeds into pleasure until you can’t tell which is which; the only thoughts you can manage are that heeseung feels heavenly inside you that it’s almost blinding and you don’t know if you even really want him to stop. 

but his hips begin to stutter, his cock twitching against your fluttering walls, and you faintly register that he’s about to pull out of you. blindly, your hand searches for any part of him to pull him back over you, legs locking around his waist. he protests, some flurry of words about how he doesn’t want to make you uncomfortable (not a single one intelligible), while you whine and pull him towards you by his shoulder.

“wanna feel you, seung,” you say, a limp arm winding around him and inching him closer until your noses are brushing and you can feel his breath fanning across you, still smelling faintly of his alcohol from earlier. “don’t worry about it, ‘kay? y’said you’d do anything, so please. i wanna feel you s’bad.”

that seems to be enough to egg him on because he nods and you catch him in a messy kiss before he groans against your lips as he finally comes. he lands a few more sharp thrusts that have you whining, fucking his cum into you, before he finally falls still. his breath is hot on your shoulder as he recovers.

usually, once you’re done, your select partner of the night pulls out, maybe cleans you up, and then leaves. it’s been a while since you’ve had someone who wants to stay (at least, you hope heeseung wants to stay) and you’re not quite sure where to go from here. there hadn’t really been much discussion about where your relationship was going to lead after this, even with all of the lingering glances on campus and your impromptu study sessions at the library, so you’re worrying a little about what comes after.

stuck in your own head, you don’t even notice that heeseung has pulled his head from your shoulder and is looking at you until his thumb works your bottom lip out from beneath your teeth and then wipes away some of the sweat at your hairline. the furrow of his eyebrows carve deep lines into the space between them as he studies you, looking like an angel with the way the fairy lights strung up above him give him a faint golden halo.

“what’re you thinking about?” he asks softly, brushing his fingers across your cheek. it’s a wholly different energy than just a few minutes ago, but the change isn’t unwelcome.

you shrug, blinking up at him and reaching to push some of his hair out of his eyes, the strands matted to his forehead with sweat. “just wondering what we do now, i guess.”

heeseung’s eyes crinkle at the corners as he smiles a little, his shoulders shaking with a breathy little laugh. you almost punch at his shoulder for laughing at you when he cranes his head down to kiss you gently, the first that isn’t rushed in some way. he nudges your nose with his when he pulls back just a little bit.

“can we worry about all the big stuff later?” he questions; you feel the words as much as you hear them, his lips barely brushing your own as he says them. “for now, how about we clean up first and then… i’m hungry. are you?”

it’s your turn to laugh, but you nod. you’re still a little drunk, your however many cups of jungle juice compared to his measly one whiskey.

“so we clean up and then go get taco bell? it’s, like, the only fast food place still open at this hour.”

“you do know that the line is gonna be insane, right? like, half of campus goes there after getting drunk.”

heeseung lets another quiet laugh loose and sits up, pulling you up with him and then into his lap, his dick still snug inside you. the feel of it doesn’t wind you up again like you thought it might, but it’s a nice reminder that he’s here, that this all actually happened. he rests a hand on your thigh and lets his thumb trace lines into the skin there absently.

“then i guess we’ll have time to talk about what you wanna do now,” he says sincerely, the smile on his face soft.

you have so many words you want to say, a million sentences tornadoing in your head right now, all jumbled up and lacking any sense of coherency. so instead, you cup his cheeks in your hands and return the kiss from just a few moments ago. he meets you halfway, all soft and pliant and giving, everything you could have dreamed up.

“wanna shower?” you ask when you pull away, giggling when he chases after you for another kiss. “feel like it might be a little more effective than a rag.”

the boy raises an eyebrow and eyes you suspiciously. “you tryin’ to go for a round two? because that’s what it sounds like right now.”

you push at his shoulders and laugh when he catches your wrists in his hands, pulling you into a third kiss. “wasn’t my intention, but i won’t turn down the idea.”

“i’ll think about it,” he responds as he taps at your hips and lifts you off of him. his seed starts to leak out with his cock no longer there to hold it in and you feel incomplete without him, but when he stands and offers you a hand to help you out of bed, suddenly the feeling of emptiness isn’t as oppressive.

you teeter across your room, opening the wardrobe to pull out the two towels you have and your shower caddy. heeseung accepts the towel you extend to him graciously, wrapping it around his waist. when you’re done securing your own towel, he’s already waiting for you by the door, one hand on the knob and the other reaching out towards you once you get close enough to him. and then you’re two people walking down the hall hand in hand, wrapped in matching pink towels towards the unisex bathroom. it’s a little unconventional, maybe, but you don’t think you’d have it any other way.

liv probably would though, but what she doesn’t know won’t hurt her. heeseung’s your little secret after all.

© hoshologies 2023. do not translate, copy, or repost my work on any site.

[solar-wing]

okay, just so you guys know...

I'm still working on Shadowing Nightwing. Just making edits and doing my best to tone down the length because it's well over 40k words and I–... I just can't.

Also, I'm trying to make sure that it's good and spicy enough for what y'all are expecting, but also something that won't get taken down on patreon, tumblr, etc. the literal second it's up—because again, it's spicy. Honestly, what I might end up doing is posting the first part of it, and then doing what I did with 'One Kent Was Enough,' linking the rest of the story to AO3 cause I'm tired of having to jump through hoops and loops with these platforms.

like Patreon is taking forever to "review" and put back one of my stories for "violating" community guidelines. And don't even get me started with Tumblr and their nonsense because I just saw one of my mutuals get his post hidden on here due to "explicit sexual content" that was "outside" of user guidelines.

and the crazy part is, his fic was under 1,500 words and was nowhere near as bad as some of the fem!reader content I've seen on here. Like I know I keep ranting about this (and I'll damn sure continue to), but I'm so sick of the bias against m!reader content, especially when it's explicit.

We already get a bunch of fem readers getting mad at us for not wanting to write content that includes them even when we explicitly state that we are m!reader authors and only write for male or gen!neutral readers. Then, the content we do write for our audience always ends up getting flagged or taken down for being outside of user guidelines, when it's barely anything bad.

Like the amount of abduction, non-con/CNC that could be considered borderline grape without the g, coercion, manipulation, Stockholm Syndrome, YANDERE, etc. f!reader fics I've read on this platform and others that have no warnings, flags, or shadowbans from what I can tell is truly something ridiculous. Matter of fact, they'll literally have the most likes, reblogs, and engagement I've ever seen. But, our male reader fics get flagged for using the word bussy instead of pussy...I'm not even joking.

but, I digress.

ANYWAY, with all that being said, once Shadowing Nightwing is posted, I'm gonna take a break away from smut and Omegaverse fics for a minute only because trying to do that specific stuff has started to feel more like a job than something I enjoy and have fun with, and I don't want to burn myself out or give y'all content that I'm not proud of or feel like it's half-assed.

Plus, I'll be honest, this past week has been really hard mentally, emotionally, and creatively for me given the results of this election, I can't even say I'm surprised, but I can damn well say I'm pissed off. Like, I can barely write without sitting there thinking about the fact that this orange peel of a FELON AND THUG—yeah I said it for you sibling and cousin fucking, buck-tooth, bobblehead, ding-dong, dropped ON your heads, mindless little minions—ahem—I mean, conservatives (if conservative means conversing brain cells that is) and his adult sid phillips looking ass v.p. cheated like someone trapped in a room with all their favorite foods while being on a diet, or more than half this country is really that stupid.

keep in mind, we're talking about a country with a lacking education system paired with a population of *checks note* sibling and cousin fucking, buck-tooth, bobblehead, DING-DONG, SLAMMED on their heads, mindless little minion bitches—AHEM—conservatives so that last part really wouldn't be surprising.

but again, I digress.

Shadowing Nightwing will be out soon, and we'll be returning to some PG-13 content for some time until I can wrap my head around this—or find the cheapest and quickest flight to Saturn—whichever comes first.

anyways, pls stay safe out there guys in these next four years, especially my minorities out there WHO VOTED FOR KAMALA AND TIM. If you voted third-party, didn't vote, or voted for the felon and adult sid phillips, I PRAY you get everything you voted for ���. no seriously, I'm really rooting for you 😊

MWAH 😘 kisses, bitches 💛

to the rest of my lovelies, I love you all, stay safe and shine bright, and I'll be here soon with Shadowing Nightwing (that is if I haven't found a direct flight to Saturn first...fingers crossed🤞🏽)

[oatmealdaydreams]

The Well

Let me know if ya wanna be added on or taken off the general taglist! Finally got a damn hurt/comfort oneshot outta me for this fandom. Took me long enough.

Pairing: Sea Grunkles, gen

Warnings: Homelessness, Neglect of Health, Implied/Referenced Abuse, PTSD, Scars

Summary: It clicks in Ford’s mind what exactly Stan’s situation has been for the past ten years before he came to Gravity Falls. He is horrified at such a realization. Guilt and regret war in his mind as Stan notices the look on his brother’s face and tries to help.

Notes: Not really proud of how this turned out, but hope y'all like it! Title is from the song, The Well by The Crane Wives.

Inspired By Works: We're Still Here by Simplistic_Apricity on ao3! Go check it out, it's super good.

[Masterlist] | ao3 link

[fic under the cut]

Send me anywhere, take me out I’m the well that they’re gonna drag you down

~ “The Well”, The Crane Wives

=-=-=-=-=

There is something absolutely terrifying about having a sibling. 

Through everything they’ve been through—every mistake, every cussed-out argument, every heartfelt hand on the shoulder—Ford hasn’t given Stan nearly as much credit for his strength as he should. Not his physical strength, though he knows Stanley has a respectful amount of it. No, he means his mental strength. He doesn’t know what happened over the past ten years since they’d separated, and maybe he should’ve asked when Stanley first knocked on his door. After realizing that it was his brother, putting the crossbow down, checking his eyes—he should’ve at least had a good look at his drifter of a twin. It’s now, even with the threat of Bill hanging over his head like a dangling sword, that he’s starting to note Stan’s appearance. And he’s…well, this can’t be right, can it?

A greasy mullet that looks like it’s starting to thin out. Dirty, stained clothes. Scruffy face. Facial hair that’s barely there. Eyebags almost as bad as his own, hallowed and haunted. There’s a persistent reeking smell, wafting through the air. It makes Ford want to scrunch his nose up at how disgusting it is. His jacket looks worn, torn here and there, old with stitching that’s ready to pull apart at the seams. He…needs a shower. When was the last time he had a shower? Now that he’s asking questions, when was the last time he ate? Sure, he isn’t exactly skinny, but he walks around like it’s out of a survival habit instead of actually having the energy to do so. Ford can’t really judge in that regard, he knows, with how little energy he has himself. But that’s the thing, isn’t it? Stanley should be fine. He’s supposed to be fine. He’s got more of a charm than Ford does when it comes to people. Ford kept telling himself that, when their Pa had thrown the dufflebag at his brother and sent him on his way with nothing but that and the car, that he’d be fine. Because Stan was resourceful and good with people, so he’d figure it out and everything. 

He never let himself think about how little his brother was given to start with, and how little he still seems to have. 

But now? Maybe Ford should’ve called him up instead of assuming Stan would be alright on his own. Instead of waiting for Stan to do it himself. Instead of refusing to swallow down his bitter pride, knowing in the back of his mind that Stan might’ve been living out of his car. He should’ve done a lot of things, but he can’t change what he’s done in the past. He can try to make up for his stupidity now. 

There are numerous hardly-healed scars and concerning marks on Stanley, he notes as he glances at his brother sitting on the couch. Purplish lines, keloids, jagged and long ones, ones that must’ve had a poorly done stitch job. There’s circular ones in certain places, and all Ford can think with horror in his inner-dialogue is when did he get shot? When did he get this many scars? Why are some of his teeth slightly off? Did he need dental surgery at one point? What happened to his brother?

His stomach twists and churns at the thought of Stanley hurt, bleeding, injured, and without someone to go to. He thought Stan could make easy friends like they did when they were kids. He’s always been good with people, even if his academic knowledge was hardly scraping by. But if his appearance and actions since he got here are anything to go by…

Oh.

Oh, god.

Ford feels close to vomiting the more he thinks about it. Everything clicks, and it’s horrible, why didn’t he just call him? He would’ve answered. He would’ve answered. His face must pale as he stares in widened horror at his realization because now Stanley is looking at him with furrowed eyebrows and concern.

“Hey, buddy, you doin’ okay?” he whispers, as if talking to a defensive animal. 

Ford can’t remember how to form words. His mouth feels dry. Stan frowns at the lack of a response. Ford’s gaze darts to Stan as he stands, fighting down a flinch at the sudden, quick movement. 

“Ford, c’mon, what spookin’ ya, huh?” Stanley takes a step closer, careful, watching him for any reactions. 

Stanford swallows, and his throat is just as dry as his mouth. He almost wonders if he looks like a caged animal the way his eyes stay wide, darting, alert. 

Scared, his brain supplies, though he chooses to ignore it. Horrified at what you let happen to him. 

Maybe he deserves it, bitter pride bites back, a rabid feral dog. He ruined my life. 

He was supposed to be fine. He was supposed to be okay, something childlike chimes in. 

You’re supposed to be his big brother, a part of him that he doesn’t dare to name comments, and the other parts of his mind shut up for once. How can you boast about being fifteen minutes older, whine about a mistake from ten years ago and claim it’s all his fault, when you’re the one who’s supposed to protect him? He always protected you. Why can’t you do the same for him?

And it sticks to his brain. 

He always protected you. 

“Poindexter,” Stanley calls for him, hands on his shoulders. 

Ford can’t hide the slight flinch from sudden contact, but neither of them move for a moment. Stanford’s gaze flickers to look Stan straight in his eyes. It’s too much. He should look away, say something, anything, but he can’t bring himself to do a single thing. It feels a little too closely like when Bill takes control of his body, keeping him watching but unable to stop whatever that dream demon wants to do. Helpless. 

Ford finally musters the will to clear his throat. He doesn’t want to think about how similar this feels to Bill. He needs to focus. 

“Ford?” Stan calls again, quieter, gentle. 

“I didn’t know,” Ford’s voice is hardly above a lingering whisper. 

“What?”

“I didn’t know.”

“Pal, ya gotta explain whatcha mean.”

Ford swallows, and he finds it difficult, “You—I thought you’d be fine.”

Stan gives him a look of confusion, furrowing his eyebrows further. Tilting his head, he tries to reach for what Stanford could possibly be talking about. Thought he’d be fine? Claiming he didn’t know something? What in the fucking world—oh. 

Oh, shit.

Stanley glances away from his brother, face forced into cool neutrality. Watching the realization dawn on him causes a prickling anxiety to erupt in Ford’s chest. It’s a feeling he’s used to, however, with all that he’s gone through with Bill, and so he has plenty of practice operating while engulfed in such a thing. 

“You’re always so good with people, Stanley,” his voice chokes and chops and he’s really surprised he hasn’t cried yet. “Thought you’d figure it out.” 

Stan glances back at him, an almost distant look in his eyes, “...Figure it out?”

“Make friends like you did when—like you did.” 

Various emotions flicker and flash across Stanley’s eyes, none of them staying long enough to name properly, shifting around in the core of his pupils. The frightened look in Ford’s eyes persists, and perhaps that’s what keeps Stan from rolling his eyes at him and scoffing in his face. 

“Tch, really had that much faith in me, huh?” comes out quietly, mumbling, almost too vulnerable for either of them to handle. 

Ford doesn’t know how to respond to this, so he doesn’t. 

He just stares. 

“Look where it gotcha, Poindexter,” Stan tries to mutter aside, but Ford hears it anyway with a hitching breath. 

They just…stare at each other as a tense and uncomfortable silence bathes the room. Stan doesn’t have the energy to let go of Ford’s shoulders. Ford might vomit if Stan lets go of him. 

“Moses, okay, could ya just calm down? I turned out fine! I still got the car and everything. Even tried a few business ventures, heh,” Stan desperately tries making this more light-hearted, joking, wanting nothing to do with the kind of conversation this may turn into. 

“I would’ve answered,” is the reply he gets.

“And done what? Huh, Stanford? What the fuck would’ve you done?” anger, indignant and lingering, growls and snarls. 

Anger is a dog that barks and bites, hurt and feral and wanting the pain to stop. 

“I don’t know! Something, maybe, I’d have at least talked to you!”

“And what would you’ve said? Because I sure as hell never got a call from you!”

“You’d call me if you needed to, I didn’t think—”

“Didn’t think, huh? Jeez, thought ya were the smart one.”

“I had no reason to believe you wouldn’t! I didn’t need to worry unless you said anything!”

“So, what, expect me to fuck up your life more?”

“I-no! That isn’t—”

“Well, guess what, Poindexter? I did call you!”

“You—wait, what?”

Emotions flicker around as they argue, fear of what might’ve happened to Stanley turns into defensive anger at being mocked and then into blatant confusion because his brother actually called him and he didn’t know. 

“Turns out Pa was right when he called me a pussy,” Stan continues as if it’s fine, which, hey, it isn’t. “Couldn’t even say nothin’ when ya answered.”

“You…that was you? You called me?” 

“What, ya goin’ deaf, Poindexter? Barely even thirty.”

“No, I–ugh!” Ford squeezes his eyes shut in frustrated and self-targeted disappointment. 

Stanley called him. He called him, but felt as though he couldn’t say anything to him. Why didn’t he? Surely, he knew he’d pick up and talk to him? Especially if it meant Stan was in trouble! He would’ve…he…what would he have done? He’d been working with Bill, with Fiddleford, building the portal. He had his stupid project, all of his research and work…what would he have said? Truthfully? That he was busy? Would he have really left his research for Stan?

A flash of his science fair project, the humiliation, the crushing weight of disappointment, the anger, the hurt. 

…He would’ve been more worried that Stanley would break his important equipment like he’d done to his work in the past. He would’ve barked out a slew of excuses why he couldn’t come to him. He would’ve hung up. Despite how much he’d missed his brother—though he refused to admit it for so long—he’d push him away. Reason that it’s for the best. 

Bill could’ve gotten to him. 

He could’ve…but Stan…

Fuck.

“You’re not a coward, Stan,” Ford tries. 

Stan snorts at him. “No, I mean it. Genuinely. You…you have so many scars,” they ignore the way Stanford’s voice cracks near the end. 

Stanley shifts in place, the movement felt by Ford through his shoulders. 

Fuck, how can he do this? He doesn’t know what he’s doing. He can’t articulate it properly. Scientific research and flowery language, yes. He could regale his findings on the cryptids and anomalies of Gravity Falls for hours and hours to anything who’d listen. But this? Emotions, people? What he actually felt? He rather have his teeth pulled. 

Actually, no, that was very painful to wake up to. 

Stan’s gaze softens the slightest bit, and then they’re back to this weird tense, awkward, emotion-driven silence that neither of them know how to navigate. Fuck, why is this is so hard? 

Ford does the only thing he knows will bring his point across. 

Stan stumbles backwards a little as his brother rushes forward and hugs him. He freezes, surprised by the fact that he’s hugging him. What are they, kids? But then Ford wraps his arms around him, squeezes, moves a hand to hold the back of his neck, and Stan just can’t anymore. He can’t deal with all the bouncing emotions that ping-pong everywhere. He can’t deal with this. Stan breaks, teary eyes he’ll pass off as dust, and hesitantly lightly wraps his arms around Ford in return. Ford squeezes again, and Stan tightens his hold on him. He grips the back of Ford’s jacket in an attempt to keep it together. 

He fails, and little droplets of tears drip onto Ford’s shoulder. If Ford notices, he doesn’t comment on it. He just holds him. He holds his brother. 

And maybe…maybe he can protect Stan this time. 

It’s his turn to keep him safe.

Taglist: @lost-in-thought-20 @thegoldenduckie @not-sure-what-im-feeling

[gaybananabread]

Hii!!! This is gonna be a long one lol and also I feel a bit weird so sorry in advance🙏🙏 had this random idea about day 11 where it was hurt/comfort, percy jackson heroes of olympus, lee!leo ler!will and leo has to stop by the infirmary after coming back to life to just make sure everything’s alright and he was having a shit day and Will notices and asks him about it and he tells Will about all the things he’d been through (throughout the books or what we’re told previously), and Will gives him a hug and is comforting him and stuff and he accidentally tks him and asks for confirmation if it’s okay and then hugs him and tks him

I KNOW THATS A LOT SO I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND IF YOU CAN’T TAKE THIS ONE OR IF YOU’D PREFER NOT TO BUT WHICHEVER WAY THAT ENDS UP BEING THANK YOU AND I HOPE YOU HAVE. AGOOD DAY/geN

TickleTober Day 11 - Hug

~Uhm, HELLO?!? I LOVE this prompt! Never feel bad for giving me a lot; I love hearing y'all's ideas! (⁠ ^w^ ⁠) It's been a hot second since I've read the books, so I'm sorry if they feel OOC. This takes place in The Hidden Oracle when Leo shows up at Camp HB. Thank you so much for requesting, and I hope you Enjoy!~

Lee: Leo Valdez

Ler: Will Solace

Summary: Leo is feeling like flaming garbage after returning to camp. He visits Will to make sure everything inside him is how it should be. Luckily, the healer knows just how to mend his broken spirits.

Warnings: spoilers for HOO and TOA! This is a tickle fic, so if you don't like that, scroll away!!

“Please keep off that leg for a few days, okay? I know it feels fine, but I don't want you damaging any tissue that didn't fully heal.”

Will smiled tiredly as he sent off the last injured camper from his medical tent. The Colossus had done quite a bit of damage; he'd been helping folks almost the entire day.

With a groan, the blonde collapsed on a clean cot, running a hand down his face. He missed the sound of the tent flap opening, keeping his eyes closed.

“Uh…howdy, stranger.”

The boy jolted upwards, grabbing the nearest item and pointing it at the intruder somewhat menacingly. His face fell when he noticed that, one, he was holding a glove balloon he'd made for an upset camper, and two, Leo was the one in the opening.

“Oh…Leo! Hey, sorry about…yeah. I'm just frazzled.” Will lowered his “weapon,” hopping off the cot to greet the boy. “What's up?”

“You're cool, man. Just wanted to get a checkup, make sure all my insides came back right.” Leo chuckled, poking his own side in an attempt to lighten the mood. He and Will weren't super close; he didn't want things to be awkward.

“Right…right! How could I forget?!” Will immediately sprung up, reinvigorated by guilt and frantic panic. What if Leo's intestines didn't come back right?! It was a godly cure, and they weren't always keen on demigod safety…

“Woah- hey! It's cool, man, it's cool! You've been busy; we're good.” Leo smiled, though it was a little off-putting to Will. He seemed…less. Less excited, less energetic, less snarky.

Less himself.

After he had Leo situated on the cot, he tried to sneakily ask him how he was doing during the checkup. The fiery demigod didn't seem like the type to readily discuss his feelings.

“So how have things been since…ya know.” Will awkwardly asked as he checked Leo's reflexes. The boy's leg kicked out healthily.

“Interesting, I guess. Wish I'd gotten a cool scar or something. Would've been worth it,” Leo joked, though a small part of him was serious. A sick, bad-boy scar wouldn't have been the worst side effect.

“Hmm. Alright…” Now Will was worried; jokes like that weren't a sigh of good mental health. He'd sacrificed himself to save them, but he'd done it pretty secretively.

“Can I touch here? I need to give you a quick physical.” Will pointed to his middle, not wanting to move forward until he had consent. With Leo's nod, he continued.

“I mean, it wasn't horrid, ya know?” Leo began to ramble, trying to fill the semi-awkward silence. It was suffocating. “Sure, it hurt, but… I didn't see the underworld or anything. No real damage done!”

“Leo…” The blonde paused, furrowing his brows. Nope: that was getting addressed.

“Are you okay? Mentally, physically, all of it?”

The brunette bit his lip, feeling his eyes water. Damn it! He'd been trying so hard to stay upbeat; he'd just have to lie.

“I…” Leo's voice broke, and he cursed himself for it. Before he could bury his face in his hands and combust, a strong pair of arms wrapped around him.

“It's okay, Leo. You don't have to be perfectly happy. You're allowed to feel broken.” Will's voice was steady and soothing as he reassured the shorter boy, squeezing him just tightly enough to feel secure.

For a few minutes, Leo just melted into the embrace, letting the tears and the sounds that came with them flow. He'd been bottling up so much since he was revived, and even beforehand.

When it felt like his lungs weren't trying to kill him, Leo attempted to speak. He hated how weak his voice sounded.

“Sorry, I…yeah. Didn't mean to fall apart.” Leo's gaze fell, though quickly snapped back up when he fell Will pull away. The other boy's hands remained on his shoulders, grounding him.

“There's nothing to be sorry for, Leo. You needed to cry after literally dying and coming back to life. That's completely valid.”

How could that boy be so calming, yet make him so sad?! Leo blamed Apollo children's poetry skills.

“O-okay, okay, I get it! Quit making me all mushy, you jerk,” Leo snapped, though he instantly melted back into the hug when Will pulled him in.

“Just making sure you remember.” Will chuckled fondly, feeling a protective urge wash over him. He wanted Leo to feel safe and secure. “You wanna talk about it?”

“I…yeah. Yeah, actually, I do.” Leo nodded, feeling a bit surprised by himself. He usually hated talking about his feelings, but Will was such a nice friend; he felt secure enough to open up.

Leo told him about everything: his mother, the Wilderness camp, the fear of making his decision, the guilt from lying to his friends on the Argo II, the all-encompassing agony he'd endured during his death, the guilt he still felt from making his friends cry and coming back after Jason was gone.

Will listened to all of it, still holding Leo and helping him vent. While most of the content was saddening and serious, the blonde was happy Leo was getting it out.

“I just don't know what to do, ya know? How do I stop feeling so…ick?” Leo splayed his fingers out, trying to show his general unease with his hands.

“There's a few ways, though everyone copes differently. What're you hoping to feel instead of ‘ick’?” Will spoke gently, trying not to use too many big, mentally-concious words. It was still a miracle that Leo opened up at all.

“I dunno…happy, I guess? Less heavy. I wanna go back to feeling like I'm alive, rather than…well, ya know. Burdened.” Leo laughed at that; it felt weird to actually say “burdened” in context.

Will searched his mind, trying to remember something that would help. His thoughts wandered to one of Nico’s bad days, remembering how he'd cheered the boy up. That could work…

“Do you trust me?”

“What?” Leo tilted his head, wondering why Will just suddenly asked that. Random… “Uh, yeah. Why?”

“Hold your arms out. If you hate it, tell me to stop, and I will.” Will's words were cryptic, of course; he didn't wanna spook Leo by outright asking for the goofy permission. He really did think it would help.

“Uh, okay?” Leo did as he was told, holding his arms out by his sides. The scenario felt vaguely familiar, though he couldn't place why.

Will wrapped his arms around Leo's middle once again, holding him close. Before the son of Hephaestus could question him, he felt ten wiggling fingers on each of his sides.

“Pfft- whahahahat?! Wihill!” Leo squirmed in place, his arms snapping down to his sides. Will's were already blocking the way, so he couldn't really protect himself from the tickles.

“What? Everyone needs a good laugh sometimes. These are a good way to lighten up.” Will shrugged, settling his chin on Leo's shoulder. He could feel the abnormal heat radiating off the boy, but it only made him even more comfy.

“S-seheheriously? Thihis is duhuhumb!” Wriggling around, Leo tried to pry Will's hands off. Thanks to their position, he could really only swipe at the blonde's forearms and complain.

“If you don't like it, just tell me to stop. You know I will.”

Ugh, that wasn't fair! Leo didn't actually want him to stop, but he was basically making him admit that! It was ruining his bad boy image!

“Shuhut uhuhup, Solace!”

That made Will's dumb grin double in size. Leo couldn't see it, but the sunshine boy was really happy that he was enjoying the tickles. One, he found another friend that enjoyed them, and two, he was actually helping Leo feel better. Two birds, one stone!

“I wonder if your ribs are ticklish…” Will thought out loud, moving his hands up to scribble on the backs of Leo's ribcage. He wasn't disappointed; belly laughter quickly replaced the giggles, filling Will's ears.

“CRAHAHAHAP!” Leo's warm hands settled on Will's shoulders, squeezing as he tried not to violently squirm. A very not-nice word slipped through his laughter, making Will gasp.

“Leo Valdez! Language!” Will pretended to be angry, doubling down on the rib tickles. Okay, maybe that was hypocritical—he’d said much worse during stressful moments—but it was too fun to pass up. “I won't tolerate profanity in my med bay!”

Leo snorted—dear gods, snorted—as the sensations intensified; he was losing control of himself. His hands were heating up more and more, and that only led to one thing.

“OHOKAHAHAY! *snort* STOHOHOP!”

Will immediately stopped the tickling, switching to rubbing gentle circles on Leo's back. His palms rubbed over the backs of the giggly boy's ribs, helping to ease the phantom sensations.

Leo flexed his hands as he calmed down, feeling the heat recede back into his arms and deep into his chest. Despite nearly losing control, he felt…really damn good.

“W-wohow.”

“See? Told you it would help.” Will's fond tone was appreciated, though it appealed to Leo's more mischievous side; he was already plotting revenge.

“Fihine, yeah, you were right.” Leo tried to be sarcastic, but the weight had been lifted off his chest. Even if it was only temporary, he felt relieved. “Thanks, Will. Seriously.”

“No problem, Leo. If you ever need another quick dose, I'm always here.” Will gave Leo's side a little poke, earning a giggly growl.

“Watch it, Solace. You've got one coming.” Leo gave the blonde one last hug before heading out of the tent, feeling ten pounds lighter than when he entered. He was definitely going to return the favor…

Will smiled, quickly sanitizing the cot Leo was on before allowing himself to fully relax. Man, that was fun; the stress from before was gone, leaving him tired, but happy.

After a few minutes of rest, he hauled himself out of his cot and went to find Nico. Some cuddles would be the perfect way to end such a busy day. And hey, maybe he'd drop a few hints about Leo's treatment.

Laughter is the best medicine, after all...

[bi4bisamjess]

here's my spreadsheet of every supernatural fic I even entertained liking a little bit. if y'all want it.

either dean centric gen, destiel, or /oc. no wincest.

[somefanficrecomendations]

January Monthly Roundup

BATFAMILY

Three’s a Crowd (But I’m Here if You Are) by JUBE514 (Bernard Dowd/Tim Drake/Conner Kent) 20k, Identity Reveal, Fluff      Bernard pops the top off his water bottle, a roll of his wrist at the perfect angle and it comes right off, and pops the faucet in Tim’s very nice kitchen to cold. Tim presses a kiss to the back of Bernard’s neck before Tim moves to the fridge to get his own water.      Bernard used to not drink as much water, but Tim drinks enough water for three people a day so Bernard naturally has followed- and now Bernard has no acne so he’s sort of mad about it actually. “The main character has two hands.” Bernard chimes easy and teasing. “Polygamy is the awnser here babe.”      Tim peaks over the door of the fridge. “Oh? Is this you telling me something?” —      Tim Drake, Bernard Dowd, and Kon-El have two hands each. They use them to hold onto each other.

My Evil Twin From Another Universe by FabulaRasa (Hal Jordan/Bruce Wayne) 22k An interdimensional anomaly strands another version of Hal in this universe, and two Hal Jordans in one universe is several Hal Jordans too many.

this week in heroblr by UnidentifiedFroggy (multi) 22k, WIP, Social Media, okay im sorry y'all did SUPERBOY just say he's a tumblrina??? #SUPERBOY AS IN KON EL AS IN SUPERMANS CLONE #DIED IN THE CRISIS SUPERBOY #holy shit #superblr #heroblr - a viewpoint into tumblr as it might exist within my own exceedingly self-indulgent form of the dc universe, told through epistolary fashion in batfamily social media fic tradition. features heroes getting cancelled, takes of middling veracity, plenty of queerness both on heroblr and in the hero community, my self-indulgent ships, and something vaguely resembling plot and lore told obliquely through tumblr drama and outsider pov interpretations of superheroes

The Big Boss by Crowlows19 (gen) 4k, POV Outsider The story of Bruce Wayne and his family as told by his insane Wayne Enterprises calendar and the poor assistant that had to manage it all.

Batman for Dummies by Havendance (gen) 38k, No Man’s Land, Helena Bertinelli-centric In the aftermath of the quake that shook Gotham, Helena Bertinelli takes on the mantle of the Bat. (It isn’t like Batman’s using it.) If she’d known the cowl came with a certain moralizing little bird following her around — well, she probably still would’ve done it, but it would’ve been nice to know in advance. (Or: Tim and Helena team up 2: electric boogaloo. Now with more bats!)

Older Sibling Duty by Icestorm238 (gen) 2k, Batfam Names are important. The Bats tend to bypass their real names, however, in favour of increasingly dumb nicknames. The older sibling trio of Dick, Jason, and Cass are the primary instigators of this. After all, it is their duty.

AITAH For Tricking My Brother Into Drugging My Other Brother? by TaxiCabToSlowtown (gen) 1k, Social Media, Am I the Asshole? Okay, look, I know how that sounds, but hear me out. My (M, 19, "Fred") little brother (17, I’ll call him “Percy”) has problems. These problems stem a lot from the fact that his parents abandoned him for long periods of time as a kid and he didn’t have a proper upbringing. I should mention that Percy’s parents then are not the same as our parent(s) now. We’re both adopted, and I’m messed up too, I’ll admit it. Our Father (45, I’ll call him “Arthur”) had sort of turned his house into a home for kids with really traumatic families.

Welcome to the Family by ViiA01 (Hal Jordan/Bruce Wayne) 67k, WIP, Batfam Bruce’s children want to meet the man that their father deemed worthy of a smile. So they do, in the only way they know how. By breaking into people's houses and lurking in dark places. Bruce just wants his children to stop stalking Earth’s Green Lantern, if only because they're ruining his plans. And Hal? Well, Hal is convinced that Bruce has concocted a plot to get around his ‘no killing’ rule, by having his children stalk him until his heart gives out from the stress.

A Series of Unfortunately Timed Coming Out's by Queerbutstillhere (multi), 7k, Coming Out The batfamily had this gift.  This wonderful skill. They are such talented, brilliant, capable individuals. But they are absolutely horrendous at wisely timing coming out to their family members. These are their stories . Aka: "I love you all but could we stop coming out to each other during the middle of battles?"

Call to a Lonely Earth by Drag0nst0rm (gen), 7k, Angst, AU-17776 Fusion There are no children left in Gotham. Not until the multiverse spits one out right in front of Batman, at least.

buy the ticket, take the ride by Anonymous (gen), 13k, Vegas Tim had always figured that if he ever woke up in Vegas sans-memory, it would be when he was older than fourteen. But there were some things he couldn’t control, and apparently whatever had happened last night that he didn’t remember was one of them.

CROSSOVER

Keystone by Kalinjdra (gen), 26k, WIP, HPxDC Harry Potter double-checked his lists before sending off the letter to an unknown cousin. He hoped for maybe some money at least, he didn't expect to get a scary bodyguard brother instead. Jason Todd has never stopped searching for his real parents so when Tim offers solid information in exchange of taking care of some kid, he really doesn't have anything else to do but take it. No one really could have foretold what followed.

[real-raincode-takes]

this discussion ended a while ago and i didnt wanna be petty but i recently saw the same complaint happen again on another website so now im making it y'alls problem.

anyway i am genuinely baffled at the people complaining about the alleged sheer amount of porn in the rain code fandom. like, complaining about the ao3 when, compared to explicit fics, there are nearly twice as many gen fics and twice as many T rated fics each. the vast majority of mature fics are marked that way for violence. this is a very normal fandom ratio for nsfw fics. where's this surplus of porn you're seeing?

is it on tumblr? i certainly havent seen that. there are like... three nsfw text blogs but also... you can just filter them out? are you complaining about this blog? the confessions blog that allows nsfw submissions and has a whole tag for it? that's a little silly, considering you willingly came here and saw their pinned post

is it on twitter? yeah, there's some porn there but it's super rare compared to everything else, and most of it is hidden behind a poipiku or pixiv link. if you're complaining about those two websites, well, complaining about porn on pixiv or poipiku is like complaining that there are birds in the trees. even there, there's plenty of sfw art and all the spicy stuff is locked behind 18+ labels.

or are you seeing it on reddit? they dont allow porn on the subreddit so that's honestly impressive. on bluesky? well, there's hardly any rain code at all so ig the three whole porn posts there would stand out. how about on youtube? insta? where? where are you seeing all of this porn? as far as i know- and i go seeking out a lot of rain code content- adults and nsfw creators have been very reasonable, placing their stuff behind warnings and hidden in adult discord servers.

either way, i dont mind minors in this fandom - i welcome anyone because this fandom is small as hell - but even if the fandom was rampant with porn, complaining about the amount of horny adults in the "Kodaka's Horny M Rated Game" fandom is a bit strange to me in the first place.

.

[ellstersmash]

Hi all! I know how easy it is for great fics to get lost to time and buried on Ao3 by a mountain of newer or more highly viewed/kudo'ed/commented-on ones—especially in a fandom as large and active as Dragon Age. So this is my weekly-ish event where I dig up a few of them to read and then tell y'all what I've found!

☼

Bottles of Thedas

Solas/Lavellan | wc 7,346 | by @kittlesandbugs

This is cheating a little because I've read this before, but seriously, rereading this feels like paging through a college photo album. Everyone shows up and is delightfully in-character, and Kit's writing SHINES in the dialogue. Bottles is mostly funny, and a tiny bit sad in places, and heartwarming the whole way through. Plus, it's in a delightful bite-sized format!

☼

Call It Desperation

Cullen/Lavellan | wc 1,071 | by @nilesdaughter

This was a really lovely prompt fill. Not fluffy, but so sweet! Enansal seems like such a kind and conscientious leader and partner, and she and Cullen's post-Adamant reunion tugged at my heart!! Very vivid writing, too.

☼

From One Spy

Gen | wc 846 | by The_Ravenous

Oh man I am a SUCKER for unusual POVs, and this intimate peek into the mind and motivations of one of Fen'harel's spies is juicy. it kind of reads like a reflective journal entry. Feels like excellent timing, reading this before The Veilguard comes out, since now I'm wondering where this nameless elf is and what they've been up to.

☼

The double-edged sword of Duty

Iron Bull/Lavellan | wc 1,517 | by Direga

OK Bull's characterization is so good in this fic--he's thoughtful, loyal, and cool-headed in a crisis (even when he's panicking over his kadan being in danger), and I think Direga gets his thoughts on Solas right on. Also he and Mahanon are cute as hell!! I loved this.

☼

If you are a writer mentioned here and you don't want to be included for any reason, please message me and I'll take you off right away—either way, thank you for writing and sharing your work.

[iamheretoyell]

HEEEEEEEY

Whenever someone makes fan art for me, I wanna cry cause WHAT I LOVE Y'ALL WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU LIKE MY STUFF ENOUGH TO WANT TO DRAW IT I'M JUST A SILLY LITTLE RAT IN A TRENCH COAT ATP

(my third meeting for today got cancelled and my payroll is basically done so I'm likely going to be extra loud on here for the next 2-4 business hours (after I finish catching up on this fic))

I CAUGHT UP AND AM DOING HOMEWORK ON FUCKING PARALLAXES LIKE WHAT

I kinda wanna work on Revelations... Ignoring the voices fr rn

3:55 update, guys they fucked around and made my homework like, fun??? --- specifically the kind of fun that my neurodivergent lore-hungry ass dies for. WHY DID THEY DO THAT?? WHY AM I MAD THAT I HAVE TO DO SHIT THAT ISN'T MY HOMEWORK RIGHT NOW????

5:49, I just want you guys to know, since the game has been concepted, I will randomly just think about the ships in it, especially now that they're all tagged, and I just laugh about the fact that I literally own majority of the ship tags. And like, another two of them, I am like one of the only people who actively writes them. And that's genuinely so fucking funny to me like I always get a laugh out of that.

Don't ask me where I got them because they wrote themselves. (Except for Damien/Brimmy, and yes, there is a huge rant about it ready for the day someone opens up the Pandora's box of "how the fuck did you get a ship out of that??" I mean, it also wrote itself, but in a completely different way and there is a very clear cut progression from me having no idea who the fuck Brimmy was literally not even a year ago to them being one of my favorite doomed ships to write.)

But I bring this up because I'm killing time and laughing over this at the moment.

BUT AT SOME POINT I DO WANT TO POST A POLL BC I GEN WANNA KNOW WHAT Y'ALLS FAVORITE SHIP THAT I HAVE (QUESTIONABLY) CREATED IS. LIKE I'M SO FUCKING NOSY BC I HAVE ONES THAT LIKE--- I love as I live and breathe. And then there are ones that just like, fit for the story, are me playing around with dynamics bc I take nothing seriously and sometimes I just do that, or some other random fucking reason I've put a ship together (for example, the ship isn't even real, they're just being forced together for the sake of a manufactured story within a story, and this example is so not super specific and has nothing to do with anything I've ever written, am writing, or will write in the future).

I got off topic. Whatever. I'm taking my leave to go act like a village idiot because it's literally halloween.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN EVERYONE.<3

I MAY OR MAY NOT COME BACK TO DRUNKENLY POST--

Holy shit it's Friday tonight????

Let's fucking go I guess???

ANYWAYS MAY OR MAY NOT COME BACK TO DRUNKENLY POST AN ANSWER LATER.

Also p.s. if anyone's actually reading An Answer,

A. do you want to beta???? pretty please????

B. did you fall into my trap??? are you completely put off by the creek in it yet??? wait idk how far I even am post wise. WHATEVER MY POINT STANDS BC IT'S NOT EVEN JUST THE CREEK. ARE YOU PUT OFF BY THE STORY AND THE WAY IT'S BEING TOLD AND THE WAY THE CHARACTERS ACT?????

I really fucking hope so cause that's like the whole point LMAOOOO LIKE An Answer was so experimental on my part which in hindsight was maybe a bad idea because like-- we rarely get Mysterion being the villain and I was like

oh let me try something I've NEVER done before!!!

hope it carries!!!

but in the same breath, I don't really care because it will never be that serious and Kenny is also the villain in the Trin series. Maybe. Questionably. Kind of. At some point.

AND WITH THAT I'VE ACTUALLY SAID TOO MUCH BYE FOR NOW<3

[kaylinalexanderbooks]

Get to Know Me tag

Ultimate Addition

Been tagged with multiple versions of this. Will do this all in one.

And maybe this will be the definitive version.

Thanks to: @herrmannhalsteadproduction here, @sleepywriter00 here, @mk-writes-stuff here and here, @dyrewrites here, @infinnative here, @buffythevampirelover here, and @mysticstarlightduck here.

Tagging @illarian-rambling @gottestod-writes @cowboybrunch @blind-the-winds @uninspired-platypuss @little-peril-stories @loopyhoopywrites @its-on-site @aalinaaaaaa @randomlettrrsqqssfxwcvhxnqbwriro @thepeculiarbird + anyone else

(y'all don't have to do all of these - pick one. Honestly you can do all of them but like...only if you really want to)

Version 1

Last Song - Driving the Last Spike (Genesis)

Currently Watching - Star Trek Voyager in my trek marathon, still have a little bit of Phineas and Ferb to rewatch, MythBusters, Whose Line is it Anyway, The Bad Batch as it comes out, and I keep forgetting the last bit of Hamster and Gretel is on D+ rip

Three Ships - uhhh the least controversial I feel will be Robin/Starfire (Teen Titans), Kirk/Spock (Star Trek), and Dakota/Cavendish (Milo Murphy's Law)

Favorite color - T E A L 🩵💚 it slaps. Btw this: 🩵 is not teal but it's the emoji that pops up when I type teal wtf teal is GREENER that's like cyan which also has the same emoji I'm sick of people calling light blue teal

Currently reading - beta reading Whispers by @magic-is-something-we-create and making my way through Purple Hyacinth on Webtoon

Currently consuming - uh just woke up will have my coffee in a bit

Place of birth - Earth

Currently location - pretty sure it's Earth

Last movie - True Lies (first time watching)

Version 2

Are you named after anyone? No my mom was sick of the family name she was given so revolted against peer pressure.

When was the last time you cried? Uhh couple days ago got caught in traffic due to an accident and went a separate way only to find myself on the feeder road with more traffic from another accident so I had to pull into a Jaguar parking lot before I got full a panic attack

Do you have kids? No please dear God. Future students are my kids.

What sport do you/have you played? Soccer when I was like in kindergarten.

Do you sarcasm? See next answer

What's the first thing you notice about someone? That they exist

Eye color? Brown

Scary movie or happy ending? These aren't opposites?? Scary movies have happy endings! So happy endings.

Any talents? Uh, writing, I guess. Media analysis. I can read fast. I'm Gen Z and can write in cursive. I kick ass at the puzzle match mini game on Wii Party.

Where were you born? *Double checks* yeah still Earth

Hobbies? Writing, reading, watching TV, scrolling through Tumblr, media analysis, watching YouTube, daydreaming, listening to music, useless data analysis

Any pets? Two cats

Height? 5'4

Favorite subject? ELAR (reading/writing) that's why I want to teach it

Dream job? See above

Version 3

Currently reading - answered this above

Last song - I'm doing this on a different day (sorry) and now it's Crazy Little Thing Called Love (Queen)

Currently watching - said above

Current fic - uh I'm just reading the stuff I already said

Current hyperfixation - brain recently has been toggling between Phineas and Ferb, Teen Titans (2003), Avatar The Last Airbender, Megamind, and my WIP The Secret Portal so uh pick one

Favorite color - T E A L

Sweet/spicy/savory - I guess savory but yeah depends on mood

Relationship status - happily dating ❤️

Last thing I Googled - Ming-Na Wen (wanted to know her age. She's 60)

Song stuck in my head - currently Somebody To Love (Queen - was listening to the greatest hits)

Favorite food - my dad's food, specifically his Cincinnati chili and his cake

Dream trip - New Zealand or Tokyo

Version 4

(highlight what describes you)

APPEARANCE

Dark hair* // I prefer loose clothing to tight clothing // I have one or more piercings // I have at least one tattoo // I have dyed or highlighted my hair // I have gotten plastic surgery // I have or had braces // I sunburn easily // I have freckles // I paint my nails // I typically wear makeup // I don't often smile// I am pleased with how I look // I prefer Nike to Adidas // I wear baseball hats backwards

*up for debate

ACTIVITIES/INTERESTS

I play a sport // I can play an instrument // I am artistic // I know more than one language // I have won a trophy in some sort of competition // I can cook or bake without a recipe // I know how to swim // I enjoy writing // I can do origami* // I prefer movies to tv shows // I can execute a perfect somersault // I enjoy singing // I could survive in the wild on my own // I have read a new book series this year // I enjoy spending time with friends // I travel during work or school breaks // I can do a handstand

*with instructions and not well

RELATIONSHIPS

I am in a relationship // I have been single for over a year// I have a crush* // I have a friend I've known for ten years // my parents are together // I have dated my best friend+ // I am adopted // My crush has confessed to me // I have a long distance relationship^ // I am an only child // I give advice to my friends // I have made an online friend // I met up with someone I have met online

*does my gf count as a crush? I still act like it lol

+am dating

^i think this is referring to romance but I do have other friends in other states

SEASONS

I have heard the ocean in a conch shell // I have watched the sunrise* // I enjoy rainy days // I have slept under the stars // I meditate outside // the sound of chirping calms me // I enjoy the smell of the beach // I know what snow tastes like // I listen to music to fall asleep // I enjoy thunderstorms // I enjoy cloud watching // I have attended a bonfire // I pay close attention to colours // I find mystery in the ocean // I enjoy hiking on nature paths // autumn is my favourite season

*I think once could be making that up

Take your bets if I'm an outdoorsy person (nope)

MISCELLANEOUS

I can fall asleep in a moving vehicle // I am the mom friend // I live by a certain quote // I like the smell of Sharpies // I am involved in extracurricular activities // I enjoy Mexican food // I can drive a stick shift // I believe in true love // I make up scenarios to fall asleep // I sing in the shower* // I wish I lived in a video game // I have a canopy above my bed+ // I am multiracial // I am a redhead // I own at least 3 dogs

*quietly

+used to

EDIT: I've decided to add onto this post whenever I get a new get to know me tag, so from here on out this was not in the original post

Version 5

I'm over 5'5 / I wear glasses or contacts (glasses) / I have blonde hair / I often wear sweatshirts (I think some of them count?) / I prefer loose clothing over tight clothes / I have one or two piercings / i have at least one tattoo / i have blue eyes / i have dyed or highlighted my hair / i have or have had braces / i have freckles / i paint my nails / I typically wear makeup / i don't often smile / resting boss face / i play sports (was in soccer in kindergarten haha) / I play an instrument (used to, violin) / i know more than one language (I know some ASL but I've forgotten most of it... ) / I can cook or bake / i like writing / i like to read / i can multitask / I have never dated anyone / I have a best friend that I have known for over five years (Cado, how has it been seven years almost????) / I am an only child

Version 6

Last song: as of answering this, technically I watched Psych so the theme song!

Favorite color: you should know this at this point in the post

Currently watching: Psych like I said, also Star Trek Voyager and a few on the side still (see above)

Sweet/spicy/savory: see Version 3

Current obsession: ...Psych but also my WIPs :)

Last thing I googled: thesaurus because I was doing the @sipofsnips and didn't have the word this morning

Favorite season: they all suck but I'll go with fall

Skill I'd like to learn: I want to draw good

Best advice: "thinking about it counts as working on it" because it's changed my outlook on how much I get done in a day, "progress is progress" for similar reasons but more general, and generally that if you burn yourself out trying to do everything nothing gets done

Woo! This was a LOT holy shit. Hope you know more about me!

Version 7

A scent you love: ooh cookies baking smells wonderful

Something you're looking forward to this week: finals finished yesterday which means more free time for me! I get to catch up on reading and writing!!

Currently reading: beta for Whispers by @magic-is-something-we-create WHICH I CAN FINALLY GET BACK TO WOOOO

Currently playing: not a video game person sorry - but I've been occasionally picking at mobile games like Animal Restaurant

Most recent movie: uh... When did I last watch a movie?? I think it was True Lies?? First time watching. Wasn't expecting it to be as chaotic as it was.

Current show: Star Trek Voyager and Psych! Partially rewatch/first time watching every episode and total rewatch respectively! I've not seen either since middle school so this is super exciting

Favorite season: autumn because it's starting to get cooler and pollen isn't everywhere

Recently learned: took a life in the universe class this semester and learned a lot about life in the universe (obviously) and while I have mixed feelings about the class MAN the content was fascinating

Water intake: currently drinking water like always :) । have to pee

[hauntedppgpaints]

Warden's big fic rec list!

Hey y'all. I was inspired by @simmyfrobby to type up a fic rec, so here we are! These are the fics I have bookmarked on AO3, organized and summarized for everyone. Enjoy! :)

Fics with the rarest pairings (only ones in the relationship tag!):

drivin' nowhere fast. (7810 words) by draisaitleons Rating: Explicit Relationships: Linus Ullmark/Matthew Tkachuk Summary: “Hey, I just wanted to say thank you. For earlier.” Linus looks quizzically at Matthew, clearly unsure of what he means and unaware that he was there until he had spoken. That was going to make this a little more painful than Matthew had been hoping for. “For, you know, protecting my head. On the way down.” Matthew clears his throat, “At the net.”

go ahead and try a little crazy on me (4062 words) by lagerlout Rating: Explicit Relationships: Leon Draisaitl/Artūrs Šilovs Additional Tags: Winner's Room Summary: Leon huffs out a laugh before he can help himself. Goddamn, this fucking goalie is cute. He doesn’t know if he’s trying to be cute but he is.

leave an imprint (on my skin) (2733 words) by cokehead_zeroed Rating: Explicit Relationships: Brad Marchand/Mitch Marner Additional Tags: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Knotting, Daddy Kink, Feminization Summary: Mitch does not think that this is what Cooper and Cassidy meant when they said that Team Canada should focus on finding compatibility. Instead of being able to focus on passes and shots, Mitch has found himself perpetually sniffing the air, trying to isolate this one alpha’s scent out of the two dozen ones that are present. Mitch catches sea air, pine, something like brown sugar; the smell of it is electric and intoxicating, and it’s throwing him completely off his game. It’s made even worse by the fact that their lines aren’t gelling, and he’s not sure how much of it is dealing with players and systems and line changes and how much of it is the fact that he just wants to spend the whole Olympics following this scent around.

écoutez-moi (14483 words) by hyacinthed Rating: Explicit Relationships: Mason Marchment/Morgan Rielly Summary: He stares blankly at Madison, 27, who enjoys white wine and pilates and the Blue Jays, staring until his screen shuts off and he’s left with his face reflected in the smudged glass. Things shouldn’t be this hard. Like, logically, people have been figuring out how to get laid for centuries, unaware that the Earth is round but still knowing how to get some, and now it’s 2022 and they’ve moved beyond sundials and Mason’s still scratching his head like a caveman. (Or, the one where Tinder's serving up inter-conference rivals and Mason just can't stay away.)

Fics with rare pairs (less than 20 fics in their tag):

young and new-made green (8750 words) by chevalric Rating: Explicit Relationships: Joel Farabee/Scott Laughton/Michael Raffl Additional Tags: Weird Biology, Non-Human Genitalia, Philadelphia Flyers, Dubious Frog Biology Summary: Joel is fucked, basically. As fucked as it’s possible for a frog to be, and that’s pretty frogging fucked.

Pregame Routine (4406 words) by inlovewithnight Rating: Explicit Relationships: Braden Holtby/Tom Wilson Summary: Tom's going to take care of Holts, going into game five.

Plus Minus (4784 words) by barefootstarz Rating: Teen Relationships: Sean Couturier/Evgeni Malkin Summary: This is most definitely not Romeo and Juliet, despite Sid and Claude's every effort. What it is, is two guys. That's all. Just two guys, a couple of dates, and a new relationship.

Gen fics

Problem Child (8184 words) by aleksrothis Rating: General Audiences Characters: Tyler Seguin, Tuukka Rask, Additional Tags: Age Regression/De-Aging Summary: Tyler knows weird shit happens in hockey, okay, so he shouldn't have been surprised when he opened his hotel room door to find Looch standing there with a screaming child in his arms. “He can be your problem now,” Looch tells him, holding the child out to him. “I need a drink.”

Catch and Release (22722 words) by McSpot Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Characters: Mario Ferraro, Braden Holtby, Brenden Dillon, Brent Burns Summary: If a player gets forced onto the opposing team's bench during play, that player officially becomes a member of their team. There's a whole system to catching players, with strategies determining who the prime targets are and the best way to catch them. Nobody expected Mario to be caught.

You Got a Friend in Me (1050 words) by seascribble Rating: General Audiences Characters: Colorado Avalanche Ensemble, Erik Johnson, Nazem Kadri Summary: EJ puts a lot of work into making the new guys feel welcome, especially Naz.

and a little corner for the horror fans:

Past the Threshold (3265 words) by sevenfists Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Major Character Death Relationships: Sidney Crosby/Evgeni Malkin Summary: At the other tables, their teammates talked and ate, laughed, rubbed their eyes, yawned, sipped coffee, were alive. Everything was normal. It was a normal morning before practice. Sid was going to dinner with Geno that evening, and after that he’d probably get laid. Tomorrow they’d play the Jets. Everything was fine. “I hate fucking Winnipeg,” Sid said. Geno grinned. “Yes, same.”

A Voice Behind Me Beckons (3342 words) by CaseyJuTardis Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence Characters: Marc-Andre Fleury, Evgeni Malkin, Sidney Crosby, Kris Letang Additional Tags: Horror, Body Horror, Supernatural Elements, Cannibalism, Psychological Horror Summary: There’s no real way to know when it all started. It was first noticed with Flower, but how far back does it go? How long has this curse been passed from person to person, draining life until all that’s left is the all-consuming hunger? No one knows. This thing- this insidious, cloying curse- is ancient. Ever-present but unseen. Like a disease. Or a predator, lying in wait.

[pinkjoy-cons]

𝙹𝚞𝚜𝚝 𝙷𝚘𝚕𝚍 𝙼𝚎

𝑷𝒂𝒓𝒊𝒏𝒈: 𝑪𝒉𝒊𝒍𝒅𝒆/𝑨𝒋𝒂𝒙 𝒙 𝑭𝒆𝒎!𝑹𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

Word Count: 2425

Warnings: Hurt/Comfort (i think?) it's fluffy at the end, talking about someone breaking into your house, panicing, screaming, crying, talk/use of weapons, you have a fear of lighting/thunder, unedited. I think that's it.

Note: I am working on making my fics gender neutral but with female body in mind. I have a Diluc fic that will be female and a Kaeya fic that I will rework to make it gen neutral. Just letting y'all know :)

For my darling

You loved Liyue, you truly did. It’s a beautiful city with an even more colorful history and people who make it the way it is today. There are so many sights and sounds and so many unexplored locations around the valleys and plains that it constantly kept you busy. Even when you couldn’t leave to adventure on your own, the city had enough for you to do day in and day out. Zhongli and Hu Tao certainly gave you enough work at the Wanghsheng Funeral Parlor. Being their personal and sometimes only admin worker, you were able to balance the peaceful life of leisure and commission work. You couldn’t have asked for a better city to call your home. There was one thing however you did not anticipate: The rain. More specifically how loud it could get.

You didn’t mind the rain; on the contrary, you loved it. As long as it was calm and light. Nothing like the storms that Liyue sees during their seasons. The rain and thunder would get so boisterous at times it would take everything in your power to not jump in your skin and take shelter under the nearest cover. Even when indoors, you found the comfort of being hidden subsided your disliking of the torrential weather. You weren’t afraid of the rain. That was something you would deny to your dying breath. Your boyfriend, however, would love to playfully poke your side whenever you startle and find comfort in his arms. 

“I should really find the Archon who’s causing this storm and thank them. You’re not normally this cuddly when the weather is sunny.” As much as you wanted to smack to stupid smirk that was absolutley on his face, you couldn’t find it in yourself to pry away from Childe’s warm chest where your face was currently buried in. You gripped the front of his shirt as the wind seemed to pick up and cause the rain to hit the window of your small shared home with more force.

“Why must you make fun of me like this?” You grumbled into his soft shirt. “Can’t you see that I’m–” 

“Scared?” That interruption did force you to look up at him with a slight pout. Jutting out your bottom lip in protest of the accusation. “Are you finally gonna admit it darling?”

“NO! I’m not scared. I do not have a fear of stormy weather. I just…I can do without it sometimes.” Your head rested once again on Childe’s chest as he lovingly rubbed your back. He couldn’t help but chuckle at your stubbornness. It was one of your flaws yes, but it was something that could be very endearing at times. Times like now for instance. He let the conversation die with a Whatever you say lovely as you both enjoyed the rest of the evening together.

About two weeks later, Childe told you that he was going to be on assignment for a week, no more than two, and would be gone for a while. He hated to leave your side, not just because he missed you but because he was concerned for your well-being at times as well. He knew Zhongli, Hu Tao and even the little cook from the Wanmin Restaurant would keep an eye on you for him. They loved you almost as much as he did so he knew that you were in good hands while you were gone. So, you gave him a kiss goodbye the early morning he left. 

The daily routine you had proceeded without a hitch while Childe was away. A few new things happened here and there like Xiangling asking you to help her with a new dish or Yun Jin asking for your opinion on a new piece she has but other than that, nothing seemed too out of the ordinary. About a week and a half into Childe’s departure you were stopped by Lan near the Guild. You finished up a commission with Zhongli (he had graciously accompanied you on this job because it involved some fighting that you were subpar at and you wanted the Mora) and went to claim your pay when she pulled you aside for a moment.

“You live up near the pass, correct? In that small housing area?”

“Yes, why? Is something wrong, is someone looking for a place to stay?”

“No it’s not that, it’s just I heard a few things about the area.” 

“What kind of things?” Zhongli inquired.

“People were saying that Treasure Hoarders were seen setting up camps. Apparently, some hotshot bragged about the area being a good place for loot and they just seemed to flock there. Now normally it’s not that big a deal, but with the weather recently and with how big this rumor is, the Hoarders sometimes get…aggressive with people.”

At that you furrowed your brow, “Aggressive how?”

“They seem to think that because we’re locals we must know about this fabulous treasure, yet no matter how many times people explain that it doesn’t exist, they don’t believe us. Sometimes they get violent and a few people have gotten hurt. One person even reported that when the weather got bad, a group tried to break into their home for shelter. Luckily their dog was able to scare them off.”

“That’s awful, are the Millelith aware of the situation.” Zhongli asked, growing more concerned by the minute.

“They are, however, the housing area is a bit ways away, so they only send a few guards at a time. I have spoken to one who would report back to Liyue Qixing about sending more but that was only recent so I can’t give a date as to when they will be posted. Even the Traveler said she would sweep the area when she could to get rid of them but despite her great feats, she still is just one person.” The clouds overhead began to darken and you could feel the faintest drops begin to fall. It was about time you got home.

Lan noticed your distraught expression, “I promise I didn’t bring this up to scare you. I just thought you should be made aware of the situation.”

“Huh?” Was all you could manage.

“Your face, you look frightened to death.” Your head looked up at the clouds again as the sprinkle began.

“I’m not scared.” Was what you mustered as you thanked Lan and made your way home.

Zhongli, ever the gentleman and protector, walked you the entire way and even offered to stay the night just to keep watch. You politely declined the offer. The couch was not very big and you only had one bed in your cozy home so you wouldn’t want him to be uncomfortable all night. Not sure if you were aware of it but the look in your eyes seemed to only grow more fearful as the rain got louder. As much as he wanted to stay, he knew to respect yours (and he’s sure Childe’s) wishes and left you with a good night for the evening.

Alone with your thoughts, you did your best to just go to bed. Not even bothering to eat, you thought that maybe you could sleep through the coming storm. As fast as you could you changed into one of Childe’s shirts, got under the covers and held his pillow to your chest for comfort. 

Your plan seemed to almost work, key word almost. In the middle of the night a loud crash startled you awake with a scream. Catching your breath, you begrudgingly got out of bed to check what happened but then you remembered. 

The Treasure Hoarders.

Suddenly the bedroom didn't seem like a bad place to be. Maybe if you just laid down in bed you could pretend that you were asleep and didn't hear anything. When you turned from the door a boom of thunder broke through and you jumped nearly screaming. There was no way you would be able to stay quiet. It was stupid but you wanted to do something. 

It wasn't much but you knew that Childe kept a small dagger in his nightstand. You grabbed it and with a shaking hand slowly opened your bedroom door. The rain was pounding against your little house as you walked down the hall to the living area. Every floorboard creak and noise of the house settling made you want to scream. Every now and then, a flash of lightning would illuminate the hall and you swore it never felt this long before. 

Finally, you made it to a point where you could tilt your head to look into the living room. You held the dagger close as you continued in, keeping low just in case. That's when you saw the broken window and blowing curtains. And even worse you could hear men talking outside. That's when the panic truly set in and you had no idea what to do. Not being a fighter you thought your best bet would be to run and hide. Or you could take a chance to escape and find Zhongli, Hu Tao, anyone to help you. But the idea of going outside in the rain frightened you just as much.

Damn it you were scared, so scared that you didn't have time to make a decision, for you could hear the turning of a locked doorknob and a frustrated groan. With a gasp you fell to the floor careful not to cut yourself on the dagger. You hid to the side of the couch trying to control your heavy breathing.

"Wha'do I do? Wha'do I do? Wha'do I do?" And the door opened. It closed and heavy footsteps made their way into your house. You held a hand over your nout knowing you had fight off whoever just entered your home. The thunder grew louder and louder in your ears, tears streamed down your face, as you tried to steel your nerves. You waited until a faint, moonlit shadow was near your position and with a spark of lightning rose with a petrified scream and brought your dagger down on the intruder. 

Only this person caught your wrist with ease and grabbed your other wrist easily. You flailed and screamed.

"LET ME GO!"

"Hey! Hey! Hey! Darling it's me!"

A pause. You took a moment to catch your breath and in the flash again you saw that Childe had returned home. Your breath released and you dropped the dagger while also falling into his familiar warmth and scent. He didn't ask any questions, just held you as you cried. 

"Treasure Hoarders a-a-and thunder. They broke into people's…and the window." You picked up your head to point at the broken window. Childe let you go just to turn on the light and check. Near the broken glass was a large branch. The wind must have been strong enough to toss it into the window. Childe held up the branch to show you but quickly placed it down when you shook your head.

"But I heard voices outside." 

Knowing that he returned alone, he quickly rushed out the front door to see if anyone was out. You remained on the floor with knees held against your chest and gripping Childe's shirt.

"There's no one outside." 

"I could have sworn- gods am I going insane!" 

"No darling no, you're not." Childe went to you and held you where you sat, he lifted you up just a bit to have a better hold on you. Your body was shaking from the torment you put yourself through. He spoke soft words to you as you calmed down he held you in his lap, rocking you both back and forth to calm you down. Despite being in the rain, he was so warm. It was a warmth that you took so much comfort in.

"Ajax," you whispered, "I was so scared. There's been sightings of Hoarders and they've been getting violent. And this damn thunder. I heard the window break." You spoke in-between shaken breaths. "When I heard the door open I thought someone-" That's when it hit you, had someone truly broken into your home, what would have happened? 

He saw your mind spinning, so Childe made you face him and held your face in his hands. "Okay my love, just a second okay. I want you to take a deep breath. Can you do that for me beautiful?" You nodded and did as you were told, "Alright, now whistle." You whistled as you released. "Good girl. A few more times." You repeated the process for about a minute, this allowed your crying to stop for the most part and calmed your breathing. 

"Feel better?" He asked in a soft voice he only used around you. 

"Yes. Ajax. I was so scared." You repeated it. You had to, you didn't know what else to say.

"I know love and I'm sorry. I'm sorry I wasn't here to help you. I'm right here baby, nothing is going to happen to you I promise. And here I thought coming home early would make you cry tears of joy." He kissed your forehead when you finally let out a small scoof and a smile. "I promise nothing will happen to you. I'll put better windows and a good lock on the door. You can even have Hu Tao and  Xiangling over if you want to, I know they love you." He kissed your lips as you nodded. His kiss told you that this would not happen again if he could help it. "I don't ever want to see you like this again." It was a promise he spoke into your neck and his breath danced in your skin and made you shiver. 

A clap of thunder had you jump in his arms and he held you close. "Next time I'm in Inazuma I'm going to beat up that Shogun." He picked you up bridal style and went to the bedroom. As he laid you down, he gave you another kiss. He left the room and patched up the window. Upon return, he got comfortable in some lounge pants and no shirt and got under the covers. Bringing you into his chest, he placed his hand on your lower back to rub small, comforting circles on your skin. You held him close and relished the way he felt against you. 

"She would kick your ass." 

"Huh?"

"The Shogun. If you tried to fight her, she'd kick your ass."

All Childe could do was chuckle as you both fell asleep.

[herasyndlla]

with ahsoka coming out next week, i want to toot my own horn and say: hey guys, i wrote some pretty good rebels fic back in the day and i think y'all should go back and read them and share your thoughts about them 😘

here's some of my favourite fic that i wrote that i'm very proud of and want you guys to enjoy (again or for the first time). they aren't in any order here but if you ask i will tell you which is my favourite

• through all the years rating: teen relationship: kanan/hera season: pre show through s3

A decade is a long time to know someone. By the end of it, it would be easy to assume these two have been perfectly in sync with each other, never missing a beat. But that's not how relationships work. Kanan and Hera worked at theirs, bumps and stops and leaps forward all included. Though all the years it took to get to now, they worked and loved and hoped for even more years to come.

• the old days rating: gen relationship: ahsoka and kanan season: pre show and s2

After fighting the Inquisitors on Takobo, Ahsoka takes Kanan to assess where he's at with his lightsaber skills. But a flood of memories from a forgotten life hang over Kanan and distracting him from their training.

• for years rating: gen relationship: ezra and kanan season: s1-4

They had only been given four years together. But, without knowing it, they had filled those four years, only four, with lessons, memories, trials and errors, success and growth, and love that could last past a life time. And even when it ends, they find a way. It was only four years but it had made both their lives worth living.

• understanding rating: gen relationship: ezra and sabine season: s3

A few days after returning from Tatooine, Ezra finds himself a little off balance. Avoiding all the chaos around the base as the rebels prepare for their attack to free Lothal finally, Ezra goes and seeks a little comfort from Sabine.

• how rare and beautiful it truly is that we exist rating: teen/mature relationship: kanan/hera season: s4 to post show

What do you do when your life completely changes? How do you decide what to do next? And what if it happens again? Hera used to keep up with the galaxy spinning around her, all her plans laid out in the fashion she needed them to be. But after Kanan returns from Mandalore, there's a shift she couldn't have predicted. How do you keep up with changes that come faster with every breath taken?

• a home we chose rating: gen relationship: ezra and kanan season: post show

A decade after liberating Lothal, Ezra comes and goes from his home world. There's a whole galaxy out there to learn from, to protect, to live in. But he always returns home, how could he not after everything he did to save it. This time, his return home offers a revelation about who was from here and just what that meant.

• how long will i love rating: explicit relationship: kanan/hera season: s4

Everything changed after Kanan came back from Mandalore. And it kept changing.