#her everyday look vs formal look

[peanutty]

face

[antiquatedsimmer]

Duvessa Tidesong

Happy Mermay! I present one of my occult sims as a gift!

Duvessa Tidesong is a seawitch who enjoys using her beauty and song to lure in tourists of Sulani & drown them C: She aims to look like a tourist herself so that she may get close to them as she prowls popular spots when hunting.

Those who know of her magical profession can seek her out and make contracts to make their every wish come true!

Careful, the price is steep.

MODS/CC UNDERCUT

IF YOU WANT UR SIM TO LOOK EXACTLY LIKE MINE, you will NEED all the CC linked below :)

Thank you creators for allowing us to have access to your stuff.

DOWNLOAD DUVESSA ( Slider & Presets included & linked below ) NOW AVAILABLE ON PATREON (FREE)

EA: Pathesis

GALLER NAME ( uploaded with CC ): Duvessa Tidesong

This sim was made for playing with Spinningplumbobs Expanded Mermaids along side their Faries VS witches Mod

If you do not have these you will need to change her traits/Aspirations.

CC LINKS:

Ear Fins (Tattoo upperarm) | Cleavage Mask ( Acne ) | Skin Tints | Eyeliner | Skin/face Details | claw nails ( Mermaid tail form ) | Nails | Gills skin detail | Tiefling body detail | face light and pores ( Retired CC ) | Hand Webbing | Body Glitter | Siren skin tint & face markings | Scale shine ( Facepaint ) | Eye color1 | Eye color2 | Teeth 1 | Teeth 2 | Eye Sclera | Occult overlays | Lip Tint | Skin overlay | Eyeshadow | | Blush | Skin Pores | Lashes | Warpaint | Lip Mask | Occult skintone | Ear Preset | Eye preset | Lip Slider | Brow Slider | Chin slider | Hat slider | mouth slider | Lip detail slider | eyebrow slider | eyebrow slider 2 | Body preset | Cheekbone slider | Leg slider | Hip shape slider

Everyday:

Hair | Dress ( Cameron Dress ) | Shoes | Necklace

Formal:

Fur scarf | Hair | Dress | Heels | Necklace

Athletics:

Arm Bands | Headphones | Hair | Fishtail Leggings | Top ( Alyssa Top ) | sneakers | Necklace

Sleepwear ( Her outfit I have her perform rituals in ):

Hair | Shell Headress Shell necklace Shell earrings ( SIMSDOM WARNING :'( srry) | Dress | Wicked Fingertips | Face Veil |

Party:

Body chain | Heels | Hair | Dress ( Paris Dress ) | Necklace

Swimming:

Crochet Top | Wet Hair ( Mermaid form ) | Seashell top ( mermaid form) | Wrap Skirt | Necklace | Hair | Mermaid tail

Hot Weather:

Hat | Sunglasses | Dress | shoes | Necklace | Hair

Winter:

Boots | Pants | Sweater ( Creator Deactivated ) | Hair | Necklace

CC Creator Credits:

@simcelebrity00 @backtrack-cc @dissiasims @oakiyo @crilender @madlensims @northernsiberiawinds @tekri @okruee @remussirion @arckamsims @blahberry-pancake @simgirlz @trillyke @lady-moriel @faaeish @maxsus @joliebean @aharris00britney @pralinesims @serenity-cc @sentate @xy-a @sunivaa @sifix @isaiahillustrates @saruin @chloem-sims4 @pyxiidis @pictureamoebae @twisted-cat @/uglysim (deactivated) @clumsyalienn @thepeachyfaerie @oydis @jius-sims @atelierlena @oito-cc @dream-girl @valhallansim @arethabee @sammi-xox @octetsica @evoxyr @magic-bot @miikocc @obscurus-sims @pirumxsim @bloodmooncc @luumia Those who I could not find tumblrs for: https://www.thesimsresource.com/members/cosimetic/ https://www.patreon.com/Dumbabie

[berylgrace]

okay will you please share your sims screenshots of fics? <3<3

be warned, you have just opened the floodgates for me to overexplain every decision.......... under the cut for the sake of how insufferable i am

HWFG!!!!

starting off with Here I Go Again (mamma mia au for anyone unfamiliar). now i actually have a lot more than what i'm showing here but let's say they're... more prequel focused. and thus. kinda spoilery... but they may come later!!! anyway

just picture slipping through my fingers playing and you can tell exactly what's happening here <3

SAY I DOOOOO... I DO I DO I DO I DO I DOOOO

and a bonus, non-spoilery prequel type - silena, annabeth and piper out partying in the world's hottest girl summer ever

moving swiftly and embarrassingly onto my url namesake, the beloved miss beryl. i chose the best of what i have which is admittedly SO MUCH

this one is my FAVOURITE okay let me explain (though - obvious). left is 1979 (age 20) beryl: playful, flirty, youthful. retaining some of the country aesthetic from where she grew up. modelling a lot around this time, beer ads, cars, that sort of thing. anything that required a hot blonde in a bikini or white shirt. this is also the year (in my fic) that she has an agent, sends out headshots regularly and is not against using her feminine wiles to get roles. middle is 1986ish (age 27) beryl: full blown celebrity of the 1980s. glamorous, sexy, demanding. big hair, tan skin. many many magazine covers, tons of movies. she is hollywood. this is how she meets zeus, and later has thalia. right is 1993 (age 34) beryl: the year she wins her oscar, gets back with jupiter, and has jason. she's slightly thinner and paler in this one, with lighter hair, following with the vampy 90s look, swapping red lips for brown. career definitely at a high but the rest of her life beginning the downward spiral.

here's a better look (bad quality SO SORRY) at the differences in makeup, skin and eyebrows (though this was before i lightened the hair) to get a feel of the differences between 80s (left) and 90s (right) beryl.

and, for fun, two party looks.

now prepare for an entire lookbook because i have a problem!!! remember you asked for this... if only you knew. as always, left is 80s, right is 90s.

(everyday category) big shoulders, big jewellery, vs vampy, almost soft-goth.

(formal category) award show chic! a lot more ostentatious for the 80s side but fully glamorous both ways.

(athletic category) definitely took inspiration from like, 80s celebrity fitness tapes (lbr i mean cher) for the left, and then the sporty bright colours of the 90s.

(nightwear category) pretty simple, standard. a big robe for either if someone is at the door.

(party category) some of my FAVE looks. an 80s LBD with big hair, and a clueless-inspired ensemble <3 ugh i love playing dress up can you tell...

(swimwear category) no comment just me being obsessed with sims custom content.

(hot weather category) one thing about me is i am OBSESSED w the like, 80s supermodel in just a thin white tee and shorts look. it's SO good. i can't pull it off being too breasty but it's stunning so ofc that. and a sweeter, softer 90s look to follow.

(cold weather category) this 80s one is my FAVOURITE possible of them all? something about the brown colour pallette and the big loose shapes and layering is very 80s movie to me, like this is always how they look in the films and probably how she did too! the 90s is more playful and cooler tones, shifting into different trends.

that's all i have that's worthy of being seen I SAY AS IF I DIDN'T JUST WRITE AN ESSAY... um yeah i have a sims addiction and being a writer i love making my own fanart this way it's so dumb and entertaining. anyway, hope you enjoyed lol, probably more to come later.

[cravemeintellectually]

Imagery — Things to Look at and Contemplate:

 Postures — standing, facing upward / seated, facing forward

(Distant, incomplete, uncertain and in process vs. immediate, complete and confident in the moment.)

 Colors — gold, red and white, above grey and blue / blue, white and yellow, flanked by black and white

(The clear, high and brilliant calling to unfolding, unformed, unclear potential vs. mystery embedded in mystery)

 Clothing — nude / robed (Natural vs. formal)

 Symbols —

 coffins / pillars and veil

(Awakening vs. initiation)

 white banner with red cross / scroll and cross

(New awareness vs. ancient knowledge)

 trumpet / crown

(Loud inner imperative vs. silent inner certainty)

 Foreground — the angels and nudes / priestess

(Complexity of beginning vs. simplicity of completion)

Astrology:

 Fire (Judgement) — the natural, visible force of light and heat

 Moon (High Priestess) — the keeper of mysteries and secrets

Predilection:

 Loud and Active vs. Quiet and Patient

 Raw and Direct vs. Subtle and Discreet

 Open to the new and experimental vs.

A preference for the ancient & timeless

Judgement and The High Priestess share the energy of beginnings, the beginning of an awakening and the beginning of an initiation. And so they also share the finality of endings, since each marks an irrevocable boundary between levels of awareness. The Priestess guards the gate to the last secrets of self and world. Judgement is the door to the beginnings of the secret knowledge of self and world. On the far side of Judgement everything is sound asleep in the dream of the everyday. On the far side of The Priestess everything is wide awake at the end of the final journey.

Judgement listens to the sound of a call so loud that it cannot be ignored. It emerges from the ordinary, stripped of everything it previously held precious and identified with. It begins a brand new life in a world made new by a new awareness, awakened and motivated by a distant energy it hears and obeys but doesn't understand. It finds itself in a state of constant transformation fueled by a steady and unquenchable inner fire.

The High Priestess is mysterious, self-effacing and self-sufficient. Her silence is ancient and perfect. She says nothing and does nothing, but leaves nothing unsaid or undone. She is cool, serene and complete.

Unintegrated and imperfectly realized, Judgement can be deaf to the inner call and heedless of its potential, remaining steadfastly concerned with everyday matters and ordinary pursuits. Nevertheless, it can still be susceptible to visions, ghosts and all sorts of paranormal experiences, with a strong psychic talent and a readiness to believe stories of the super- and supra-natural.

The stubborn denial of Judgement can join forces with the Priestess' certainty that she knows everything. When this happens, they combine as foolish self-confidence alternating with a fear of the unknown, making personal growth a harrowing experience.

Together, they focus on the transcendent rather than on the commonplace. They combine high energy, and a capacity for radical change and impressive growth, with an intuitive awareness of the vastness of the mystery of things. They can be great explorers, willing to plunge into the fertile and frightening unknown and take their chances with it.

what are y’all’s tarot birth cards?

mine are the tower and the chariot

[sarasbeads]

STERLING SILVER VS. OTHER METALS: WHY STERLING SILVER JEWELLERY IS THE BEST CHOICE

Choosing the right metal for Jewellery can be a game-changer. Whether you’re looking for a piece that complements your everyday style or a unique design that makes a statement, sterling silver Jewellery often shines brightest. But why? How does it compare to other metals like gold and platinum, and why do so many people end up choosing it over other options? Let’s dive in and find out.

WHAT IS STERLING SILVER?

If you’re new to Jewellery shopping or just getting into metals, you might wonder, "What exactly is sterling silver?" Unlike pure silver, which is too soft for daily wear, sterling silver is an alloy, typically made up of 92.5% silver and 7.5% other metals (usually copper). This blend gives it strength and durability, allowing it to withstand the daily wear and tear of life without losing its natural shine.

QUALITY THAT SETS SILVER JEWELLERY APART

Silver Jewellery has a classic, timeless appeal. It’s versatile enough for casual and formal settings, making it a popular choice for people of all ages. Unlike costume Jewellery that loses its luster over time, sterling silver can look brand new with just a bit of care, even years down the line. This combination of beauty and practicality makes it an ideal choice for anyone looking to invest in Jewellery that lasts.

1. STERLING SILVER VS. GOLD

AESTHETIC APPEAL

One of the first decisions we face when buying Jewellery is whether to go with silver or gold. While gold has a rich, warm tone that’s undeniably luxurious, it can sometimes feel too bold for daily wear. Sterling silver, on the other hand, has a soft elegance that can be dressed up or down with ease.

Take my friend Sarah, for example. She has a beautiful gold necklace she reserves for formal events, but her sterling silver pieces are her go-tos for daily wear. From casual outfits to professional attire, silver seems to complement just about everything, adding a touch of sophistication without stealing the show.

DURABILITY AND MAINTENANCE DIFFERENCES

Another factor worth considering is durability. Gold, especially pure gold, is softer than sterling silver, which means it’s more prone to scratches and dents. On the other hand, sterling silver’s copper content gives it the resilience needed for active lifestyles. And when it comes to maintenance, sterling silver is straightforward cleaning it with a simple cloth can restore its shine.

For those who prefer a low-maintenance option, cheap sterling silver Jewellery can provide both beauty and practicality without demanding too much attention. Investing in quality pieces that require minimal upkeep ensures that your Jewellery remains stunning with little effort.

AFFORDABILITY AND VALUE FOR MONEY

Let's be honest: gold is expensive! While it’s undoubtedly an investment, sterling silver provides an affordable alternative without sacrificing beauty or quality. You can easily find high-quality, cheap sterling silver Jewellery online that looks stunning without breaking the bank.

2. STERLING SILVER VS. PLATINUM

KEY DIFFERENCES IN APPEARANCE

Sterling silver and platinum might look similar at first glance, but they have distinct characteristics. Platinum has a more muted, grayish hue, while sterling silver tends to have a brighter, whiter shine. If you want your Jewellery to stand out, the vibrant sheen of sterling silver is hard to beat.

Many Jewellery lovers appreciate the way sterling silver catches the light, creating a radiant effect that adds to its charm. This quality makes it an excellent choice for both statement pieces and subtle accessories.

COST COMPARISON

Platinum is one of the most expensive metals available, and for good reason. Its durability and rarity make it a premium choice. However, for those of us who don’t want to spend a fortune, sterling silver offers a comparable look at a fraction of the cost. Plus, when you factor in options like sterling silver Jewellery with free shipping or discounts, it’s easy to see why so many people gravitate toward it.

The cost-effectiveness of sterling silver allows consumers to expand their collections without feeling guilty. You can purchase multiple pieces like a sterling silver ring for women or a unique silver daisy ring handmade without exceeding your budget.

PLATINUM’S DURABILITY VS. STERLING SILVER’S APPEAL

While platinum may be more durable, sterling silver is perfect for those who enjoy updating their Jewellery collection often. Its affordability allows for variety, so you can invest in multiple pieces without a hefty price tag. Plus, sterling silver’s longevity makes it suitable for all types of Jewellery, from everyday rings to delicate necklaces.

3. THE UNIQUE ADVANTAGES OF STERLING SILVER JEWELLERY

PERFECT FOR FASHION AND EVERYDAY USE

Sterling silver is the best choice for fashion-forward individuals and classic Jewellery lovers alike. It’s adaptable to any style, making it the perfect metal for both trendy and timeless pieces. Whether you’re looking for a simple necklace or a bold statement ring, sterling silver can deliver.

Silver Jewellery is particularly popular in fashion circles due to its versatility. It seamlessly transitions from day to night, making it an excellent investment for those who want pieces that work across various occasions.

VERSATILE STYLE OPTIONS

From elegant sterling silver rings for women to simple silver bracelets, the options are endless. For instance, I often wear a sterling silver necklace with a minimalist pendant that goes well with everything, from jeans and a tee to a little black dress. It’s the kind of Jewellery that never looks out of place.

Moreover, handmade sterling silver Jewellery online allows artisans to create pieces that reflect personal style and creativity. Whether you prefer sleek, modern designs or more intricate, vintage-inspired looks, you’re sure to find something that resonates with you.

CUSTOMIZATION AND UNIQUE DESIGNS

Sterling silver is perfect for custom, one-of-a-kind pieces. The metal’s malleability enables artisans to craft intricate designs with personal touches. From unique engravings to personalized charms, the possibilities are endless. This is particularly appealing for those looking to buy gifts or create memorable Jewellery that tells a story.

4. POPULAR TYPES OF STERLING SILVER JEWELLERY

RINGS AND GEMSTONES

Sterling silver rings, especially those with gemstones, are a popular choice. The bright silver setting enhances the color and sparkle of stones, making them stand out beautifully. For example, sterling silver gemstone rings are ideal if you love vibrant colors and want a piece that showcases your personality.

These rings can range from delicate, understated designs to bold statement pieces, making them suitable for any occasion. Whether you’re attending a formal event or enjoying a casual outing, a well-chosen sterling silver ring can elevate your look.

SILVER DAISY RING HANDMADE – A UNIQUE CHOICE

A silver daisy ring, for example, adds a charming, handmade touch to your collection. It’s unique yet versatile, perfect for those who want a distinctive piece without an over-the-top look. The daisy symbolizes purity and new beginnings, making it a meaningful addition to your Jewellery collection.

5. NECKLACES FOR EVERY TASTE

STERLING SILVER NECKLACES ONLINE

Sterling silver necklaces online come in a variety of designs, from simple chains to statement pendants. Whether you prefer a subtle accessory or a bold focal point, there’s a sterling silver necklace to suit every taste.

A sterling silver necklace can be layered with other pieces for a trendy stacked look or worn alone for a minimalist aesthetic. Many people appreciate how easily it complements various outfits, making it a staple in any Jewellery collection.

EVIL EYE SILVER NECKLACE ONLINE FOR PROTECTION

The Evil Eye design, often set in sterling silver, has become a popular choice for its cultural significance and stylish appeal. It’s a great option if you want a piece that’s both meaningful and trendy. Wearing an evil eye silver necklace online not only adds a unique touch to your outfit but also serves as a protective symbol against negativity.

6. BRACELETS AND STATEMENT PIECES

SILVER BRACELETS WITH CLASSIC APPEAL

Silver bracelets have a classic appeal, especially in sterling silver. From bangles to cuffs, these pieces can make a statement without being overpowering. A simple sterling silver bracelet can enhance a casual outfit, while a more ornate design can elevate your look for a night out.

Consider layering multiple bracelets for a bohemian vibe or selecting a standout piece that serves as the focal point of your ensemble. The versatility of sterling silver means you can create a unique style that reflects your personality.

SILVER EVIL EYE BRACELET FOR PROTECTION

The silver evil eye bracelet for protection is another example of a piece that combines style with tradition. It’s especially popular for those who believe in the symbolism behind the Evil Eye charm. Not only does it provide an eye-catching look, but it also carries cultural significance, making it a meaningful addition to your collection.

7. STERLING SILVER IN THE UK MARKET

WHERE TO BUY STERLING SILVER JEWELLERY IN THE UK

The UK market offers many reputable stores for buying sterling silver Jewellery, both online and offline. When choosing a retailer, look for one that provides quality guarantees and customer reviews to ensure a positive experience. Online options are plentiful, and you can often find exclusive deals like free shipping, making it even easier to buy sterling silver Jewellery online.

THE RISE OF ONLINE SHOPPING

Online shopping has revolutionized the way we purchase Jewellery. With the convenience of browsing various styles and comparing prices, it’s easier than ever to find the perfect piece. Websites dedicated to handmade sterling silver Jewellery online allow artisans to showcase their creations, offering unique designs that you won’t find in typical retail stores.

8. CARING FOR YOUR STERLING SILVER JEWELLERY

ESSENTIAL MAINTENANCE TIPS

Taking care of your silver Jewellery is crucial to preserving its beauty. Here are a few essential tips:

Regular Cleaning: Use a soft cloth to wipe your Jewellery after each wear to remove oils and dirt.

Storage: Store your Jewellery in a cool, dry place, ideally in an anti-tarnish bag.

Avoid Chemicals: Keep your pieces away from harsh chemicals, which can dull their shine.

KEEPING YOUR JEWELLERY LOOKING NEW

With proper care, your sterling silver Jewellery will retain its shine and elegance for years. Polishing clothes are an excellent investment, and a little regular maintenance can go a long way in keeping your Jewellery looking as beautiful as the day you bought it.

CONCLUSION: WHY STERLING SILVER JEWELLERY IS THE IDEAL CHOICE

In conclusion, sterling silver jewellery stands out for its beauty, versatility, and affordability, offering elegance and charm that appeal to various personal styles. Whether you’re seeking a delicate sterling silver necklace or a bold sterling silver ring, the range of options available ensures there’s something for everyone. Sterling silver not only enhances your Jewellery collection but also embodies your personal style. 

As you explore the diverse options available, remember that silver jewellery is an investment in both beauty and quality. When you’re ready to elevate your collection, browse our vast array of silver jewellery online. If you’d like to purchase a stunning piece or have any questions, don’t hesitate to contact us today! Our team is ready to assist you in finding the perfect addition to your Jewellery collection.

[porhomme21]

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[isabellarosestudio5]

Week 9

Notes/Reflections:

- think on formal qualities of work. Visually composing with bodies. Colour palette, line, space, shape, texture, etc. (Look to the works of Alicia Frankovich, works with performers in an often formal way.) (Also, works often interrogate social conventions and performers relationship to site. Very relevant).

- Think about projections and scale (works by Pipilotti Rist).

- how do qualities of form and concept overlap when working with performative media?

- does considering form take away from conceptually intentions? Does form become decorative? Can you avoid it?

- Paul Auster Interview:

Artist Research:

Alicia Frankovich:

"The work of Alicia Frankovich has evolved through a practice of installation toward this recent focus on her own body as performative subject and sculptural object. Reference to the performing body, however, has been consistent in her work in the construction and styling of earlier installations... The wide reach of Constructivism’s idealist project to turn art into social action is evoked in structures echoing gymnastic apparatuses, banners bearing the names of Eastern European gymnasts and references to Ikea furniture—historical echoes of Constructivism’s ambitions to reform the social body through work, celebration and habitation"

- A Plane for Behavers, 2009

There is a notable similarity in our histories, both coming from backgrounds in elite sport (dance vs gymnastics), and transferring this familiarity with the moving body into our contemporary arts practice.

"A sport once dominated by the products of the rigorous programmes of socialist nations, gymnastics represents the pursuit of a kind of idealised and controlled motion that is highly technical yet also aspires to a formalised beauty"

An interesting comment also relevant to the classical ballet industry. Leading ballet companies such as many within Russia, where ballet exists not only as a large part of culture, but as a product of national achievement.

The style of Russian ballet is also often described as being much more extreme than its French or English counterparts. (And funnily enough, it was the Russian style that I was trained in here in Australia.)

"As she says, ‘Gymnastics is partly about the body’s interaction with apparatus, psychological and physical. I’m interested in how these ideas carry across to objects, both everyday and more obscure’."

Her work would then appear to be very relevant to my current practice, where I have been examining both the relationship between the dancing body and object, and how dance can act as an intervention to examine social conditioned behavours.

Reference:

Craig-Smith, A. (2009). Alicia Frankovich: Moving still. Eyeline, 70, 22–25. https://search.informit.org/doi/10.3316/informit.964640312578073

Pipilotti Rist:

"“All it is is light, pixels and light,” says artist Pipilotti Rist (2001) of her video work, but, as she goes onto elaborate this is light that caresses spaces, kisses architectures, and that melts her viewers into her images in the creation of what she calls a “common body”"

"Resonating with phe-nomenological accounts of both cinema and installation art, light becomes understood as a medium of immersion"

"reworked the idea of the “viewer” in recognition of art as an experience to which you take your whole body"

On feminist theories of light:

"She [Irigaray] takes aim at the logic of light as an invisible medium that opens up the knowable world, for such understandings of light as a bearer of truth and reason produce and reproduce a phallocentric logic of light."

"For Irigaray, without the sense of touch, seeing would not be possible, ... “I see only by the touch of the light, and my eyes are situated in my body. I am touched and enveloped by the felt [light] even before seeing it”

"To found vision thus, in touch, is to refuse the split between mind and body, between subjective and objective, between intelligible and sensible."

I believe what is being said here, is that instead of light being associated with a masculine sense of enlightenment and logic (illuminator of the truth of things), a feminine reading of light is taken, described to touch and encompass all things around (joining the logical with the physical/natural/embodied world).

"If vision involves touching light, “then we are touched by and touching everything around us even as we see the distance between ourselves and the world"

Through this understanding, the writer goes onto to interpret Rist's works; not through a feminist reading of subject matter but rather through a feminist reading of the light itself used as material for projections.

Visitors view of Parasimpatico Exhibition 2011

Pipilotti Rist, Do Not Abandon Me Again, 2015, installation view at Kunsthaus Zurich, 2016

Reference:

Harriet Hawkins (2015) “All It Is Is Light”: Projections and Volumes, Artistic Light, and Pipilotti Rist’s Feminist Languages and Logics of Light, The Senses and Society, 10:2, 158-178, DOI: 10.1080/17458927.2015.1042230

Anne Imhof:

Examining the different temporalities of different mediums. Aka. how long does a painting last for, vs a performance.

What does abstraction look like in a performance vs a painting?

Critical reception at first was to try to associate her works with art historical movements such as the work of Judson Dance Theatre, which curator goes on to say wasn't quite right for him.

More appropriate links to media, staging, theatrics, dramatulogy, fashion, opera.

Multiple streams of practice: performance, painting, music.

Works to develop works, not just as a singular director, but co-creating with individuals. (Much as within the concept of choreography as co-created, as in contemporary dance practices.)

There is something very interesting that I would like to explore in the combination of theatrical processes with contemporary art practice.

What happens when performance, choreography, and staging is mixed with contemporary art concepts? & taken from the theatre space, into the gallery?

Imhof's work have an undeniable sense of theatricality to them. Particularly in there intensity and vulnerability of performers. Like a traditional high stakes opera or ballet narrative.

Resistance/Persistence in or against driving forces of society.

Looking at Faust, there appears to be many motifs/actions that are taken from everyday life. Movements from personal private life at home (lying down), movements from public sphere (walking, discussing), movements from the world of media (playing guitar).

The work becomes like an intensification and collision of all these familiar symbols and actions that fill our daily lives, all amplified and abstracted into this absurd ad anti-conformist performance.

"A comment on the past ... and a fight for the future ... a fight for the right to be different"

Manifesto Rosenfelt:

Making:

Photoshoot contact sheet (Total 883 photos)

Taken Friday Week 8 26th April

Concept: to use contemporary dance methods (tasking, improvisation, movement, performance) to examine and subvert socially conditioned behaviours/expectations in public space.

Movement Tasks/Prompts:

Mimic the appearance of your surroundings

Take gestures from the street and corporate world

Feel the textures and other sensory stimuli around you

Exaggerate situations of the everyday

Have a gestural conversation with the body

Put gestures from the private space into the public space

Relaxation in public space

Treat the body as an object rather than individual being

Have conversation/relationship with the site around you

Favourites:

[kanpeki-bekki]

Okay, so I wonder if the problem here has less to do with translating the register of the speaker to something more natural for the target audience than with the fact that they used わ specifically.

If this were just an everyday interview on something like "What do you think of this tourist spot?" that has nothing to do with gender or differences in cultural norms in Aus vs. Japan, then I think that masculinizing her Japanese dub would probably draw unnecessary attention to her speech for TV viewers who are probably just expecting to learn how much foreigners love this one tourist spot in Japan. And I think you'd agree--you probably wouldn't have even reacted if they had made her speech a little more feminine but more neutral in other ways, like using 私 or ます・です (although that seems a little unnatural for a TV interview, and then you'd just be thinking about formality rather than gender).

I think the real issue is that... most Japanese women nowadays don't use わ. If a Japanese woman were stopped on the street for a similar interview, I highly doubt they would use わ, and of course they would never add わ in for any subbing of their dialogue.

When I was first reading this post, my first thought was about how I was watching my partner play dubbed Uncharted. It's not a series I'm especially familiar with, but when the female character came on and was speaking in わ and の all over the place, my first thought was... "She would not say that."

I mentioned this to my partner (who is not a translator but is a huge movie buff), and he mentioned that Uncharted in particular is going for a nostalgic, Hollywood style of movie, and the dubs in that case were mimicking the translation style of films in the 80s, which in a lot of ways defined Japanese people's expectations for Hollywood movies. As a result, I think those translation styles have stuck around because they're so entwined with the sense of "Hollywood movie", although that's not to say that things shouldn't be reevaluated and changed (or maybe even are currently in the midst of changing).

In fact, I kind of wonder if the use of わ nowadays has more in common with the classic Hollywood, Mid-Atlantic accent, which was really more affectation than actual dialect. Not to say that わ is also similarly constructed--it actually appears to have a long history beginning with school girls in the Meiji period using it maybe even as a form of mild rebellion (a more in-depth paper here that looks really intriguing). That image has obviously changed as it became widespread and more established, up until the current day where it would be an unusual way for modern women to talk, for whatever reason.

I feel like there could be a lot of issues coming to a head here that I'm not necessarily qualified to discuss... Like, is there a large overlap in audiovisual translators for Hollywood movies and Japanese news shows? Are there style guides keeping translators in line with rigid gender roles that perhaps need to be reevaluated? Do Japanese people expect Westerners to speak like Hollywood stars? Is there a larger tolerance for exaggeration in Japanese entertainment (think anime and kabuki) where Westerners expect more authenticity and realism? Is there a sort of shame associated with exaggerated feminism that we might not find in men's speech?

But in my opinion (as a non-native Japanese speaker), while I think わ may have an understandable place in media translation (or even native Japanese media), I do not think it had a place in that interview translation. It sounds like that was a neutrally casual Australian phrase that was not translated into what would be an equally neutral phrase for a Japanese woman, but instead added an unnecessary element of femininity.

I’ve been having trouble putting this idea into words so you’ll have to bear with me, but I was struck when I saw a Japanese news program interviewing foreign tourists in Japan, and some australian women were dubbed over with a stereotypically feminine speech register (lots of のs and わs), and my first thought was “they weren’t speaking that femininely in english”.

A friend of mine from the UK recently mentioned that he noticed that australia has a generally more masculine culture than england - he felt that everyone is a bit more masculine here, including women. This kind of confirmed to me that my impressions of the dubbing were right - the tourists were speaking in a relatively (internationally) more masculine way. Yet their dub made them sound so much more feminine.

It made me wonder. When translating something, do you translate the manner of speaking “directly”, or “relatively” in terms of cultural norms? Maybe this graph will help me explain the question.

A direct appoach in this case might appear to a Japanese person to result in an unexpectedly masculine register, but preserves how the speaker's cultural upbringing has influenced their speech.

The news program translators chose the relative approach - I think I would prefer the direct approach. I think I prefer it because I believe translation should be a rewriting of the original utterance as if the speaker was originally speaking the target language, and the direct approach compliments that way of thinking the best.

Actually now that I type that, I’m second guessing myself. Does it? It does, if for the purposes of the “rewrite it as if they spoke japanese” thought experiment, we suppose the speaker magically learned japanese seconds before making the utterance, but what if we suppose the speaker magically grew up learning japanese - then maybe they would conform to the relative cultural values. But also, maybe they would never have said such a thing in the first place - their original utterance was informed by their upbringing and cultural values, so how could you possibly know what they would have said if they had known japanese from birth? Maybe my initial instinct was right after all?

If you work in translation, I’m very interested to hear if you have come across this problem and how you deal with it 🙏

Further reading: I think this question also ties into this problem I’ve been struggling to answer for a while.

[bxckybarness]

Together

summary: you and bucky are both recovering in wakanda but haven’t spoken to each other, up until now

word count: 1400+

a/n: just a little something i came up with today; maybe i’ll keep it going if that’s what the people want :)

part two

Life has a way of consistently knocking you over and leaving you begging for one moment of stillness. You can’t remember the last time you really felt at peace. The past few years of your life had been anything but peaceful, but could you expect anything else when you lived, worked, and were friends with the Avengers? No, you couldn’t.

And it’s not to say you didn’t enjoy life because you did. You loved your co-workers, who were more like family to you now. You loved the thrill of a new mission and the adrenaline high that you would undoubtedly have for days after. You loved that you got to go to new places and meet new people. You truly loved it all but wow, were you wiped out and ready for some silence.

Wakanda was meant to be a place of rest and restoration for you. You had nowhere to go after the Iron Man vs Cap showdown. Your closest friends within the group were all going on the run or into hiding, the others silently choosing to move on with their lives. The Avengers were the only family you had and without the consistent action of everyday life with them, you weren’t sure what you would do moving forward.

King T’Challa was kind enough to offer you a place to stay in Wakanda. He understood your loss and wanted to allow you a place to call home. After all, “We’re already hosting Bucky, why not you too?”

Bucky.

A man you hadn’t met yet, at least not formally. You had fought the winter soldier once in the middle of the freeway and nearly died in the process, but hadn’t seen him since. You knew little about him beyond what Steve had told you in moments of reminiscing. From what you gathered, he was a very nice, simple man that happened to be at the wrong place at the wrong time. Now, you might call him troubled. Not exactly under the direct control of HYDRA anymore, but not exactly himself either. Or at least that’s what you heard.

Bucky was intriguing to you. You knew he was in Wakanda for similar reasons to you - to rest and restore. And that was putting it lightly, after all, only one of you was undergoing an intense brainwash reversal process. You hadn’t talked to him much since your arrival in the African nation, however you had seen him quite often in passing, especially on days you helped Shuri in her lab.

You were always leaving as he showed up, looking tired and like the ghost of a man who had lived 3 lives over. In a small way, you understood his stress, certain that the events of the past few months had weighed heavy on all those involved. Some more than others, yes, but it was weight all the same. You knew little detail of what occurred during his sessions with Shuri beyond the basics, but you figured it was strenuous given the standoff-ish mood he always had in the lab. Maybe someday, you thought to yourself, you would stay a little longer and talk to him - try to understand the man behind that hardened look.

And maybe that day would end up being today.

On days you helped Shuri, most of your time was spent organizing documents and cleaning up the space from the last project or assignment. While an incredible mastermind, she didn’t enjoy the behind-the-scenes details. You didn’t mind the work - it gave you something to think about other than your stress and of course, provided a new-found friendship in the Wakandan princess.

On this particular day, time had gotten away from you. You usually managed to finish your tasks and be ready to go by the time Bucky arrived in the lab. But today when he walked through the fast-opening doors, he found you at a desk in the corner of the room intently looking over some papers in front of you. Upon hearing his boots hitting the floor, you glanced up quickly.

“Bucky, hi. Oh my gosh, what time is it?” you say in a panicked whisper, quickly moving your gaze from him to the watch on your wrist.

He chuckles softly, something unexpected by you, before speaking up, “Actually, I’m early.”

“Oh,” you respond warmly, a small smile gracing your features. “Well, Shuri should be here soon.”

He nods and takes a seat in a chair a few feet from where you were positioned. After a moment of silence, he speaks again, “Y/N, right?”

The slight bewilderment at the fact he knew your name must have been noticeable in your expression because he followed his statement with another, “Steve told me about you.”

“Makes sense, considering he told me about you, too.”

A flash of nervousness falls across his face before he nods at your words and the two of you fall back into a silence that is surprisingly comfortable. You glance back down at the papers in front of you, but can’t bring yourself to focus with the super soldier sitting in front of you. When you move your gaze back to him, he’s already looking at you, the nervous touch present in his stare only moments ago now a spark of curiosity.

“So you work with Shuri, then?” he asks.

You shuffle the papers into a stack, working clearly pointless, and move them to a drawer before responding.

“Just organizing and stuff. I’m not smart enough to do what she does,” you say with a laugh and a small gesture to the room around you.

He nods, his face remaining emotionless, his gaze now turning from you to the various gadgets and machines placed around the room. You hadn’t expected him to be so shy but his timidness calms your nerves and gives you a newfound confidence.

“It’s nice to finally meet you,” you speak up softly. “You know, you. As in Bucky.”

He quickly moves his gaze to the floor. The reason he had been hesitant to speak to you before this chance run-in today was because he remembered you, just like he remembered them all. He could recall the look on your face as his metal arm wrapped around your neck that day, intention to kill. He could recall the red of your eyes, the gasping of your breath. If Steve and Natasha hadn’t been there, well, he knew what would’ve happened.

You knew too, but you didn’t blame him for it. How could you? You had heard plenty of stories about HYDRA and had dealt with them enough on your own to know they never cared about the human underneath. Whoever Bucky was then, was clearly not the man in front of you. That much was evident to you, but maybe it wasn’t so obvious to him.

“I mean it,” you whisper. "And as far as I’m concerned, first impressions aren’t always everything.”

You can see his shoulders relax only slightly at your words. But even a little bit was enough for you. Before either of you can speak again, Shuri comes strolling into the lab, right on time, as per usual. Upon noticing the two of you, she smiles and offers her greeting to you before turning to Bucky, “Come, we have lots to do.”

He stands, eyes not meeting yours and retreats to the center of the room where Shuri stands. You watch for a moment before following suit by standing and gathering your things. This wasn’t how you expected your time in the lab to go. You can’t say you ever really expected to talk to Bucky Barnes - the hidden away soldier with a gruff, seemingly unwelcome attitude. But you had, and something about him intrigued you more than you would like to admit. Maybe it was because beneath the surface, you both had your traumas and you both chose to heal them here. Maybe it was the shared connection you had with feeling lost, all friends on the run. Maybe it was more than that.

And Bucky felt it too. Unbeknownst to you, his eyes followed you as you left the lab. For some strange reason, he felt comfortable around you despite your brief interaction. It was a comfort he hadn’t felt in years - not since before HYDRA. Hell, not since before the war when he and Steve were just two random Brooklyn boys taking girls dancing on the weekends. Something drew him to you. Maybe it was because he hadn’t felt judgement dripping from your words as you spoke to him. Maybe it was because he hadn’t seen the rage in your eyes at the mention of his ex-assassin exploits. Maybe it was more than that.

And maybe. Just maybe, the two of you would dive in. Open closed doors. Learn to heal.

Together.

[all-an-act]

Possibly another adopted by tokomaru hcs but if they were all adopted together?

I gotchu~

~ Mod Noire

"We'll Save You"

(TokoMaru x Platonic!Warriors Of Hope)

They heard that they were going to be adopted by Komaru and Toko, and were all instantly ":O" faced.

Masaru and Nagisa immediately take on the protective roles of the rest, stepping in front of them at all times, as if ready to accept a beating in order to protect the others.

This deeply saddens Toko, who reassures all five kids that they have nothing to worry about.

Monaca gets shunned for a while by the other four, despite deeply regretting all she had done to them prior.

This is intervened by Komaru, who stages a mini "intervention", so to speak. She basically allows Monaca to express her regret, and the other Warriors to hear her out.

"Deal with it." - Komaru, in the middle of a peaceful argument with Toko.

Masaru, surprisingly, broke down crying, and the other Warriors were not happy.

Kotoko WAS READY TO THROW HANDS-

Honestly, if it weren't for Monaca and Nagisa, both Komaru and Toko would have probably gotten killed by Kotoko's wrathful self-

Jataro was the comfort to Masaru, and Monaca joined in on that after mediating the fight.

If anyone says the word "gentle", I kid you not, Nagisa socks them in the jaw so fast-

NOBODY gets to hurt HIS little sister. His words, not mine.

Kotoko helps Monaca bedazzle her wheelchair with cute jewels, stickers, and googly eyes!

The first time a Warrior called one of them "mom", it was completely an accident.

And it was, surprisingly enough, Jataro who said it.

Toko was helping Jataro sew up his mask after it had come apart, when he blurted it out.

"Thank you, M-M-Mom."

Toko's heart felt like it could burst right then and there.

But it shattered when he began apologizing for it.

"I-I'm sorry, I don't know what g-g-got into me... I didn't mean t-to... I'll never s-say it again, I p-p-promise..."

Toko hugged him so tight, she almost squeezed the oxygen out of him.

"N-No! No! I like that you see me as your mom, because that's what I a-am now!"

Jataro was confused. All his life, his mother hadn't wanted him. The idea that someone did, especially someone so kind and sweet, baffled him. It just seemed so foreign to him, and the warm affection almost seemed to burn.

"N-N-Naegi-San, too?"

"Yes! Naegi-San is happy to be your mom, too! We love you! We both love all of you!"

The first secret came from Monaca, where she revealed that she had faked her disability. She was willing to give up the faking, but wanted to keep her wheelchair for comfort. Komaru agreed to this, and allowed her to keep her wheelchair as a comfort item.

Kotoko and Nagisa were a bit upset about that, but they eventually forgave Monaca, understanding that she only used it to obtain sympathy enough to escape from the abuse of her brother and father. Masaru and Jataro forgave her right away.

Nagisa revealed once that he was getting picked on in school, and that he wanted to be homeschooled because of it.

Genocide Jack was NOT HAVING IT.

He showed up at the school, and threatened the kids' lives with scissors had a talk with them.

That was when Nagisa realized that he really could depend on the two women. He did begin to show affection, albeit in his own kuudere way, much more often.

For example, he was a lot less snarky when correcting their grammar, math, etc., and he genuinely smiles and compliments them all the time.

Kotoko gave the first hug. She was so overwhelmed with emotion, that she shamelessly, unapologetically hugged both Komaru and Toko!

Uncle. Makoto. Is. Their. Favorite. Person. In. The. History. Of. Everything.

NOW, LET'S GET INTO HOLIDAYS WITH THIS FAMILY-

Komaru and Toko totally put all five of the kids in therapy for their trauma.

None of them are upset with it, though. They actually appreciate it.

New Year's is a surprisingly fun holiday with this family!

Kotoko, Masaru, and Monaca stay up to watch the ball drop with Komaru!

Nagisa, Jataro, and Toko are all out before eleven o'clock.

The four that are awake do fun things while waiting for the ball to drop!

For example, Monaca reads them her favorite books! She takes requests, though, and if one of them requests a specific story, she will try her best to read it. Komaru makes sure not to request anything too difficult for someone her age.

Masaru gets them all to play ping-pong with spoons and mini cupcakes.

The rounds are as follows: Masaru vs. Monaca, Masaru vs. Kotoko, Masaru vs. Komaru, Komaru vs. Monaca, Komaru vs. Kotoko, and Kotoko vs. Monaca.

Kotoko paints all their nails. Yes, even Masaru's. Masaru genuinely doesn't care, and he wants his the brightest, boldest red color she has. Komaru goes for a paler green. Monaca goes for bright green. Kotoko gets her nails painted by Masaru and Monaca; one hand for each of them.

Kotoko ends up with a half pink, half black handset, courtesy of Monaca and Masaru, respectively.

Toko and the others are disappointed that they missed all the festivities, but Komaru reassures them that there's always next year.

Valentine's Day is another fun holiday for them!

Jataro saves up all his allowance for almost four months in order to buy everyone presents!

Precious babey-

Jataro ends up giving Komaru a Ouija board, tuna eyeballs, and a new electric fan to talk to.

Yes, Jataro has witnessed her strange habits, and is curious of them.

He gets Toko a little clip-on nightlight to help her through her fear of the dark. She clips it to her shirt twenty-four-seven, and always makes sure that it has batteries.

Masaru is given a cool red basketball with his name written in white letters. He never plays with it, though, preferring to keep it in a safe place, where it won't get dirty or broken.

Nagisa is gifted a large encyclopedia. It's a simple gift, but he appreciates it, and gives Jataro a long, genuine hug.

He gifts Kotoko with a cute book with kawaii, adorbs stickers. Surprise, surprise, everybody wakes up with their faces stickered, and there are stickers all along the walls, floors, and appliances. Anybody who comes over thinks it's cute, and that only encourages Kotoko to "spread [her] adorbs-ness everywhere"!

He gives Monaca a sewing machine, because Monaca had brought up her love of fashion. He thought that maybe she would want to design her own. Monaca burst into tears, exclaiming that she felt so selfish for accepting a gift from someone she used to treat so cruelly. Of course, Jataro reassures her that that's in the past, and they're siblings now. Monaca ends up with a soft smile, and hugging the life out of a very blushy, flustered Jataro.

When St. Patrick's Day rolls around, Monaca puts her Valentine’s Day present to use! She makes cute green outfits for everyone, and takes their senses of style into account. Masaru's is designed like a jersey, Kotoko's has lots of glitter and frills, Komaru's and Toko's are designed like schoolgirl uniforms, Nagisa's is formally styled, Jataro's is leathery, and her own looks steampunk.

Kotoko convinces everyone to go look for the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow, or at least some leprechauns.

They didn't find any. :(

April Fool's Day is a D A N G E R O U S day to exist, as long as they live with Masaru.

Masaru is basically a miniature Kokichi Ouma when it comes to pranks.

He switched the sugar for salt once, and Kotoko ended up sick for two weeks, considering she eats too much of it, and probably eats it in spoonfuls.

Mother's Day is a fun one! They split Mother's Day up into five days, that way each kid got to spend time with each mother.

On the first day, Toko took Masaru to a basketball game that she had scored third-row tickets to prior to Mother's Day. He cheered so loud, and it warmed her heart to see his joy at her surprise. Masaru ended up giving her a pack of colored chalk for her to write on her chalkboard with. Komaru ended up taking Nagisa to watch Harry Potter in a theater with her, after realizing they had both read the book. In return, he gave her a meal of tuna eyeballs that he cooked, himself. They weren't perfect, but... he tried. :'3

On day two, Toko took Nagisa to go write short stories together. They googled writing prompts, and each used the same one to comprise a story of under five thousand words in ten minutes. Then, they judged and gave constructive criticism to one another. He gave her high-quality pens to write down her ideas with. Meanwhile, Komaru took Jataro to plant a garden of vegetables in the backyard, and tend to it everyday. Sometimes, Jataro talks to their plants when he feels lonely. He gave her a pretty rock. Again, he tried. :'3

On day three, Toko took Jataro on a food tour, where she drove around and they got a small snack from every food place they drove past, eventually ending up with a whole big meal! He gave her a pretty flower. All the while, Komaru took Kotoko to a fashion show where they showcased pretty glittery idol clothes and lolita clothes. She gave Komaru a song she had written in her honor. Yes, Kotoko actually spent weeks writing a song for Komaru, and even got the other Warriors to play the instruments for the music. Masaru played guitar, Nagisa played the piano, Jataro played the drums, and Monaca played the bass. Of course, Kotoko was the vocalist. (Band AU?)

On day four, Toko took Kotoko to a Morning Musume concert. I swear, everyone must have had bleeding ears from how loud Kotoko screamed for it. She ended up getting an autograph and a picture with Tanaka Reina, so she was a very, very happy girl. She gave Toko a pink card that had a painted sweet message on it and was practically swimming in pink glitter. Meanwhile, Komaru took Monaca to play video games and order Monaca's favorite food. It was something simple, but something Monaca really appreciated. They played Pac-Man, Super Smash Bros., Sonic The Hedgehog, and Crash Bandicoot. And they had tons of fun. Monaca gave her a cute new outfit, made in steampunk design, that she made, herself.

On day five, Toko took Monaca to a planetarium, where they looked at all the beautiful constellations. Monaca, being the smart cookie she is, told her all their names, what they represented, etc.! And at night, they went stargazing for real, Monaca pointing out her favorite constellations again. Monaca gave Toko an invention of hers: a program she designed that filters out spelling errors, grammar errors, etc., and suggests new ideas when writer's block comes around. Meanwhile, Komaru took Masaru to play laser tag! Komaru got "shot" sixteen times, while Masaru got "shot" three times. The two made jokes about it the entire way home, and it was just an overall fun day. He gave her the baseball that he had batted to hit the final, winning home run in his last game. It was the only winning baseball he had ever hit, so Komaru felt quite special receiving the gift.

Now, onto Father's Day~!

Genocide Jack takes an hour to spend with each kid!

He plays soccer, basketball, and baseball with Masaru for the first hour!

He reads stuffy, boring novels with Nagisa for the second hour.

He cooks the best, most fanciest meal with Jataro for the third hour!

He acts out movie and show scenes with Kotoko for the fourth hour.

He helps Monaca make inventions and sew for the fifth hour!

He refuses all of their gifts in return, however, as he doesn't believe that children who have been hurt in the past, just as Toko herself was, should be allowed to pay homage to adults.

Despite them not technically being his kids, he cares enough to step into that role for them, Toko and Komaru allowing him to do so.

The fourth of July is great!

Genocide Jack brings up the idea of taking the kids to a carnival for it, to which Toko and Komaru agree.

They all get facepaints, funnel cakes, and they ride all the rides!

They play most of the games as well, and win eight or nine stuffed animals!

It becomes an annual tradition to take the kids to the carnival for the Fourth Of July!

For Halloween, of course they're all the cutest things!

Masaru is Yasutaka Okayama. Nagisa is Albert Einstein. Jataro is Frankenstein's Monster. Kotoko is a Fairy Princess. Monaca is female Izuku Midoriya.

Kotoko has no issue using her cuteness to get extra candy.

When Thanksgiving rolls around, it's always fun!

Toko and Komaru prepare dinner the night before, while the Warriors aren't allowed downstairs. They have to call if they want something, like water, and there is a bathroom in the attic.

In the morning, when the actual cooking happens, Kotoko and Masaru beg to help, but only Nagisa is allowed to, because Nagisa is the responsible one.

Even so, they invite their family members that they are still in touch with, such as Uncle Makoto, Aunt Kyoko, Aunt Aoi, Uncle Byakuya, Uncle Yasuhiro, and even Genocide Jack makes his "grand appearance".

Honestly, it shouldn't even be surprising at this point.

Christmas is another fun time!

They do Secret Santa, but Komaru and Toko make sure that they get each other.

Masaru gets Jataro; he ends up getting Jataro a whole new array of spices and flavorings for his cooking hobby! Jataro appreciates this greatly, and uses it whenever he cooks.

Nagisa gets Kotoko; he gets her a toy microphone that works like a real one, just on a smaller scale. Nagisa can now consider himself the reason "One Room Sugar Life" is belted through the house at two in the morning every day.

Jataro gets Monaca; he buys her a whole stack of fashion magazines with her beloved Big Sis Junko in them, along with new fabric to sew with. She appreciates the gifts, and assures Jataro that he can revel in despair with her when she obtains it.

Monaca gets Masaru; she gifts him with a ping-pong set, a table tennis set, and an air hockey set. Masaru is surprised that she cared enough, to which Monaca replies, "Monaca is a changed person now. Monaca cares about you now."

Birthdays are the same as Christmas, but all their efforts focus on that one person.

They grow to all love each other very much, and all of them would happily die in defense of the others.

Monaca even eventually gives up on her obsession with Junko, hope, and despair, with their help.

All the Warriors will forever appreciate everything that Toko and Komaru have done for them.

Overall, just a completely wholesome family.

[a-queer-seminarian]

I am trying to read more theology and I would love to know what texts have been most important to you? I am not a super academic person so things that are modestly accessible would be great, but also I am trying to push myself to read more challenging texts! ty so much!

Oooh what a fun question -- I’ve offered people book recs before, but never one that’s specifically the texts that have been most important to me.

To start, i recommend my #books tag on my other blog for way more books than the ones I’ll list here -- not every post in that tag is relevant to your question here, but some are. Here’s a list of the posts that are relevant to your request -- you’ll see that on most of them, I note how accessible vs academic or dense a text seemed to me. 

a list of recs for theology that’s helpful in this 2020 climate of pandemic and protest.

a list of recs for books about being queer and Christian

And now for a list of theological texts that have been most important to me -- deeply impacting how I read the Bible, how I relate to God or to other humans or to creation, etc.:

The basics

I have to include Christian Doctrine by Shirley Guthrie on this list...

simply because it was the first book I read when trying to figure out what Reformed Protestants believe after growing up Catholic. It’s actually a fairly easy read -- it’s longish, and not like the most riveting book you’ve ever read, but dang it has great stuff in it. It made me way more excited to enter the PC(USA) denomination than I’d been before reading it -- before, I felt like i was mainly running from the crappy parts of the Roman Catholic Church; after reading it, i realized i could also be running to the beautiful parts of Reformed theology!

But yeah, if you’re looking for a book that helps solidify in your mind concepts like the Trinity, or sin, or divine inspiration....this is a great book for that! (Assuming you want to learn about those things from a(n LGBT affirming) Reformed Protestant lens.

If you wanna read tons of excerpts from this text before deciding whether you want to read the whole thing, I posted a lot of passages from it in this tag over here.

Inspired by Rachel Held Evans

this is the best book I can think of for non-academics who want to learn about reading the Bible in a way that confronts rather than ignores/accepts its more disturbing passages.

If you need help figuring out how to read the Bible without a fundamentalist / literalist lens, this is the book for you.

Holy Envy: Finding God in the Faith of Others by Barbara Brown Taylor

Very important if you want to practice a Christianity that doesn’t pit you against people of other (or no) faiths -- and very easy to read

Books that helped me develop a liberationist + queer + disabled theology

Justin Tanis’ book Transgendered was super important to me when i was first getting into trans theology...

However, the language in it isn’t particularly accessible -- it’s not horribly dense but I would now recommend OtherWise Christian by Chris Paige instead. Paige quotes from Tanis -- and many other foundational trans theologians! -- and does a great job of making their scholarly language a lot more accessible to non-academics. Ach yeah, OtherWise Christian is what you wanna read to get deep into the academia of trans theology without having to wade through the denser older books yourself.

If you do want to read some of Tanis’ book, you can read my fave chapters as pdfs here.

I’d also recommend Austen Hartke’s Transgender and Christian YouTube channel and my website blessedarethebinarybreakers.com for more trans theology presented in simpler language!

Disability: The Inclusive Church Resource by John M. Hull

Nancy Eiseland’s The Disabled God is also, like, foundational to a lot of disability theology but it’s not the easiest read. The last two chapters are the best part in my opinion.

For more great resources on disability theology, including some of my own writing (which is, I hope, easy to read), see this Google Doc i compiled once and also my disability theology tag.

Jesus and the Disinherited by Howard Thurman.

It’s a bit more academic / written more formally than some of the books on here cuz it’s older, but it’s also short and if you can get through even just the first two or three chapters you’ll have absorbed material that i promise you’ll be thinking about for a long, long time to come.

God of the Oppressed by James Cone

So foundational. Another classic by him is The Cross and the Lynching Tree. These books are both more academic but yeah, foundational stuff.

The only full text I’ve read by Gustavo Gutiérrez is On Job but I’ve read a lot of excerpts from other stuff by him...

You’ve gotta read at least a little bit of this guy to help you understand liberation theology as it originated in Latin America. Unfortunately, I do think he’s much more academic so not an “easy” read at all -- you could try to find other authors who sum up his ideas and works and offer fundamental excerpts in his own words, if you try to dig into something he’s written and find it too tough

But yeah, his book On Job in particular really helped me start figuring out “theodicy” -- the question of why there is suffering in the world / what God’s role in suffering is. But I had a lot of trouble figuring out what Gutiérrez was saying at a lot of points in the book, and I’ve been reading academic texts for like a decade now!! So if you try to read it and find it’s just too much, don’t feel bad. I only was able to get a real handle on this book after discussing it in a seminary classroom with a teacher helping us.

If you wander through my #theodicy tag, you’ll find my own understandings of suffering as shaped by On Job without having to read the book yourself! You also might like Everything Happens by Kate Bowler for a great look on suffering. 

Native: Identity, Belonging, and Rediscovering God by Kaitlin B. Curtice (progressive Christian + citizen of the Potawatomi nation)

This book is truly incredible in that its language invites you in and reads like a devotional while making powerful statements about settler colonialism and assimilation and stuff. So so so good. 

When it comes to books that have deeply enriched, like, my “personal” prayer life / relationship with God:

Learning to Walk in the Dark and An Altar in the World by Barbara Brown Taylor (Episcopal background)

This author’s books are all so easy to read, and so so so full of wisdom. If you want your theology served to you in a less “so this is theology” kind of way and more of a devotional kind of way, this is the author for you.

Also she��s super popular among non-academics and academics alike so it’s easy to find people to discuss her work with!

An Altar in the World is about finding God outside of church, in the everyday, in the “secular”...

Learning to Walk in the Dark is about forming a faith that can survive and actually nourish you during the struggles of life (as opposed to what she calls a “full solar Christianity”)

A Tree Full of Angels by Sister Macrina Wiederkehr (Catholic nun)

this one is a little bit more formal in style, but not bad if you read it like i did, which was as a devotional where i’d only read a section or two each evening. It focuses on finding the divine in the most mundane of things -- see here for some posts sharing short excerpts from it.

Wow this got long....sorry about that! And if you were hoping for more shorter works, like articles instead of whole books, let me know and I can dig through my seminary stuff and share my faves!

[aj-thegreatest]

Extras: Persephone and Levi

For fun, I doodled a few outfits for Persephone! Initially to test out her cowboy look...then it went outta hand. The glasses look came from the same Picrew as Kandi’s:

The overall outfits were options for her everyday look. The colors are more saturated, vs my first attempt. Which I ended up using. The last outfit is my take on Persephone’s canon look! I used an old top I liked as a ref, but kept the rest. I did add blue accessories for fun.

Came up with three ideas for her formal wear. I wanted to go with the 1st, but in the end I liked the 2nd. And some swimwear ideas!

I had to do some sketches for Levi…because it’s less biased. They’re sloppy, but I like them! I should draw him more later lol

[spiffyspuffy]

My Mystic Messenger Opinions

(That no one asked for)

Zen

Character: 8/10 I know a lot of people think Zens annoying but I find him endearing. One of the best things about this game is the complexity of the characters and I love that Zen’s cockiness is actually how he hides his insecurities. Even though he’s egotistical about himself, he’s never shallow with MC. He says multiple times that he doesn’t care about MC’s looks. He loves her for who she is and shows this in how he makes an effort to get to know her and be her cheerleader everyday. An underrated thing about Zen is how emotionally intelligent he is. He’s great at helping the RFA members when they need emotional support (Yoosung’s grief over loosing Rika, Jaehee crying from the stress of her job and MC’s shock at almost being kidnapped). 

Route: 2/10 Zen is a great character and he deserves a better route. The false rape accusation plot is horrible and offensive. Also, his route functions as an introduction to the game’s plot, so it’s exposition heavy and lacks action. The creators said that the lesson of his route is that when our insecurities are handled in a healthy way, they can push us to be better people. I love this message and I wish it had been highlighted more in his route.

Romantic Potential: 9/10 Zen is arguably the most dateable of all the characters. He’s a bad boy without being sketchy. He’s protective without being possessive. He’s kind without being a pushover and he’s smart without being pretentious. His biggest drawbacks are his overconfidence and and how busy he is with working. There aren’t any glaring red flags. 

~ More under the cut ~ 

Jeahee

Character: 7/10 I love this adorable theater nerd! She comes across as formal and stuffy at first, but reveals herself to be passionate and funny the more you get to know her. I gave her a lower score because she does have a strong personality that rubs me the wrong way sometimes (her jealousy of MC in Zen’s route, her lack of sympathy towards Jumin in her own route and her general rudeness towards Yoosung). She is the most mature of the RFA though, so her exasperation is warranted. Being mature and grounded also makes Jaehee the least complex Mysme character. I’ve got a lot of respect for her though!

Route: 5/10 Getting to engage in discourse about capitalism and the patriarchy? Amazing and hands down the best part of her route. It’s really inspiring to see Jaehee stand up for herself and choose to follow her dreams. I think it’s important for every young person to hear that they should have a positive work/life balance and demand that their employer supports that. Other highlights are Seven helping Jaehee by making the Power Point presentation for Jumin’s cat project, getting to fangirl with Jaehee over Zen and the creepy stalker plot. I thoroughly enjoy her route and the only reason the score is so low is because some of the other routes are seriously incredible.

Romantic Potential: 8/10 Jeahee doesn’t have any red flags either. I think she’s perfectly capable of having a healthy, romantic relationship with MC. The biggest issue standing in their way is Korea’s bias against lesbian relationships. As a fellow coffee lover and theater enthusiast though, I could definitely see myself or someone similar having a happy life with her, even if it might have to be in secret.

Yoosung

Character: 6/10 I can’t stand people who aren’t competent. Yoosung is a terrible cook, he barely cleans and he doesn’t pay attention to his studies. On top of that, 80% of his personality is that he’s a gamer AND he’s in love with his “dead” adopted cousin. Yuck. ~ But ~ I understand that he’s depressed and depression can seriously effect someone’s executive functioning. Taking all of those negatives away, we’re left with a young man who’s trying to his best to be taken seriously, which is something I can relate to. It’s nice to see imposter syndrome represented and I admire his loyalty to his friends. 

Route: 8/10 This route is sooo good! Who can forget the night when the RFA starts being aggressively stalked by Minty Eye? And the pic Zen takes of a believer looking at him through his apartment window...chills. His route only gets better from there when he infiltrates Mint Eye with Seven. This is the first time we get to see the twins interact and damn, is it confusing. But in a good way!!   The biggest drawback is that MC is stuck in Rika’s apartment and doesn’t play much of an active role in the story. 

Romantic Potential: 7/10 Despite all the negatives I listed about Yoosung, I do think he’s capable of have a healthy, romantic relationship with MC. Yoosung is also the only true sub of the RFA men, which is a definite plus for some players. Yoosung’s yandere side is a huge red flag though. MC better watch out if she doesn’t dote on him as much as he wants. Once he falls for her, he’s all in. 

Jumin

Character: 5/10 Unpopular opinion, but I hate Jumin. I understand that he’s some people’s guilty pleasure though. Jumin’s good aspects are that he’s intensely loyal, an animal lover and has a dry sense of humor. I appreciate how devoted he is to the RFA and it’s members. He offers to help Zen multiple times (albeit rejected), sends everyone body guards in his route and pays the hospital in the SE to keep Saeran’s identity top secret. What I’m not a fan of is the way he obsesses over MC and traps her in his house. This isn’t the first time he’s shown obsessive tendencies either. Seven explicitly states that Jumin acted this way with Rika in the past. Huuuge red flag.  

Route: 3/10 His entire route is fraught with rich people problems. I’m supposed to sympathize with him for an arranged marriage? All he had to do was say no. His father couldn’t force him. He’s possessive of MC because women have only ever wanted to be with him for his money? Not an excuse. Elizabeth going missing was a vaguely interesting story line, but Jumin’s relationship with his cat was cringey enough to overshadow the drama of it for me.

Romantic Potential: 3/10 Jumin has some serious issues. He’s never had a good female role model which has given him a deep seeded hatred of women. Remember when he tells MC that respecting women goes against his core beliefs? Yikes. Then, after meeting a woman who respects him and he actually likes, he locks her up and tries to change everything about her (cutting her hair, buying her a new wardrobe, teaching her the ‘proper’ way to walk, etc). We’re supposed to believe Jumin learns to be better by the end of his route, but he still proposes to MC after only a week of knowing her! I’m having a hard time picturing Jumin in a healthy relationship. 

Saeyoung

Character: 10/10 I’m not saying Saeyoung is a good person. Far from it actually. But he IS very well written and extremely interesting. In the other routes, Saeyoung is energetic and funny, bringing much needed humor to heavy moments. It’s always a joy being in a chatroom with him. Then you have the reveal that he actually hates his job and that he was faking his personality, all to a sad and slowed down version of his theme song. This plot twist shook me to my core. What makes him so well written is that the devs did a good job dropping hints to his real personality in the other routes that players might not notice during their first play through. 

Route: 9/10 This route is a wild ride from start to finish. This is when the plot threads from the other routes come together and start make sense. This route has secret agents, assassins, a deadly bomb, kidnapping, an evil twin, a powerful cult... It’s action heavy while still carrying enough emotional weight to make me cry every time. Saeyoung’s route is heavy and emotional and sooo worth playing. 

Romantic Potential: 6/10 Saeyoung has a shady job and a complicated past. Choosing to be with him means putting your life in danger every day. If you’re okay with that, he’d be a decent romantic partner. He’s a little rough around the edges, but I do think he has potential to become more like his ideal self (God Seven) after reading his AE. He’ll always have that mean and serious side to him, but I don’t think he’s hopeless. 

V

Character: 4/10 He’s low-key the worst. I sympathize with his trauma from being abused by Rika, but I don’t understand why he feels the need to fix everything by himself. Rika might be the source of most problems in this game, but V is partially responsible for standing by and letting her get away with everything. 

My first issue with him comes from encouraging Saeyoung to join the agency. I know Saeyoung didn’t have many options, but how was encouraging him to train to become a hacker and assassin the best option?! On top of that, he stalked Zen per Rika’s request and took creeper photos of him, failed miserably at protecting Saeran and don’t get me started on how he loves Rika unconditionally. V has some good characteristics but I really don’t care about those when he’s so terrible otherwise. 

Route: 10/10 This route is *chef’s kiss* the BEST. I wouldn’t call it a romance since Vs barely in it but damn is it riveting. Saeran is the perfect amount of loving and unhinged, MC get’s to know Rika on a personal level and V finally gets to be active instead of just reactive like he is in all the other routes. It’s also  satisfying to find out how much V has been keeping secret and to get a glimpse into Rika’s psyche. But what really makes V’s route stand out among the rest is that there are spy action scenes like in Saeyoung’s route, but the player also gets to spend time in Mint Eye.

Romantic Potential: 7/10 I’ll be honest. I don’t think V will ever be able to move on from Rika. He’ll always love her, as evidence in his AE. Besides that drawback, I do think he’d be a good romantic partner for MC. V was never the issue in his past relationship with Rika. She was the abusive one and he was 100% the victim. I think he would treat MC just as well in their relationship as he treated Rika. 

Saeran

Character: 7/10 I know I’m not the only one who loved the suave and cunning Saeran of the main routes who, after getting the therapy he needed, became an adorably shy and awkward man. Sadly, that’s not the character we got in AS. Instead, we met Ray, the split personality of Saeran’s psyche. Ray is charming and sweet as well as possessive and manipulative...which is something I’m into. But it’s not for everyone. Saeran’s real personality in AS is revealed to be angry and abusive and not at all similar to who he was in the main routes. I’ll give Cheritz props for writing a fairly accurate portrayal of disassociative identity disorder, but I think Saeran’s characterization is inconsistent. I get the impression Ray was an afterthought when creating AS. 

Route: 7/10 A mixed bag for me. I really enjoy any chatroom/scene with Ray. He’s undeniably creepy, but those scenes were entertaining in a dark romance kind of way. On the other hand, the Saeran scenes had a lot of unrealized potential. Abuse is never cool. All his route needed to fix this was a scene where Saeran explained to MC that he was pretending to hate her to appease Rika and the other believers. While this fake hatred is implied, I think it needed to be outright stated. It’s also hard to believe that Saeran overcame his DID in the course of one night. I know all routes are limited to 11 days, but this one needed more. Highlights of this route are Saeyoung being kidnapped by his father and of course, dark Yoosung with Elizabun. 

Romantic Potential: 7/10 I truly do believe that Saeran could go on and live a happy life in any of the endings where he escapes Mint Eye and receives therapy. While we only get a glimpse of what an emotionally stable Searan looks like, we know that he was kind and attentive with MC. Saeran is a giver and would do anything to make MC happy. Red flags are that Searan is still clingy at the end of his route. Yoosung makes a comment that he’s always holding MC’s hand when he sees them together. Also, his DID is something that will occasionally return and that’s something MC has to go into their relationship knowing. 

[donquixotehomura]

Endeavor x Reader All Is Fair In Love And War

This fic includes a hell of a bad writing shit show so sorry for the bad writing that you have to go through, I can't stand my own writing lmao, Endeavor is kinda OOC I think.. Idk, I get stupidly poetic at some points and I have weird wordings for some things, Hella long and boring, This is a fucking K-Drama

Bruh like I had about a month to write this but I procrastinated till the last day having only a starter with 2.5K words and wrote the rest in one day, a total of 11K... Bruuuuh if anybody reads this I'm sorry for your time and the cancer.

TW: yandere themes, blood, gore, descriptive violence, toxic relationships, heartbreak, death, offensive language, cursing, just a lot of bad triggering stuff, mentions of suicide, name calling.

This is during the Endeavor redemption Arc about two weeks before Endeavor VS HighEnd/Hood after that Manga spoilers start.. If you get to that point tho, you're close to the end congrats you made it.

Reader is an independent person with a strong personality, she's  strong willed and arrogant, you can say she's a more mature Bakugou with common sense lmao

This Will Contain Manga Spoilers

You yawned in boredom trying to stay awake, your eyes briefly glancing at the person who's currently speaking to all the pro heroes sitting in the room, hero commission meetings weren't only boring, they were also a waste of time you could've been patrolling and stopping villains saving civilians, but no you had to go to a different city for the meeting 'didn't these old hags and geezers hear of online meetings? We could've saved a lot of time if we didn't have to come here, what is this the 21st century?' you thought as your eyes drifted towards him, the guy who easily made your cold heart beat erratically.

Endeavor sat there not showing any emotion other than his normal intimidating expression his presence was impossible to ignore with his aura and signature flames, you could tell he didn't want to be here either but he did his hero work dutifully, your eyes trailed over his strong arms that were crossed over his chest, what made it even harder to look away was the fact that he was wearing a suit which is a rare occasion but the meeting was formal, the fabric strained to stay intact, you felt that of he flexed or took too deep of a breath the fabric would just tear apart and the buttons would go flying off, you kinda wished this would happen as you let your thoughts wonder.

How it'd feel to have those hands caress your body, to hold you tightly as he lifts you up supporting your weight, how his musculare arms would be wrapped around you as you ran your hands all over his musculare chest, you let your thoughts wonder as your eyes drank him in basically undressing him, you craved him, everything about him, not just his body, his mind, his soul, his heart, his love, you internally sighed, it's not like you both had any chance of that anyway, you snapped out of your trance feeling someone's eyes on you, looking up you realized it was Endeavor himself who was staring at you, you knew you were caught red handed and there was no getting out of it so you went with it and just smirked at him, sending a small wave.

You weren't a shy or meek person at all, you don't easily back down and your arrogance often put you in bad situations, like this one right now were your having a staring competition with Endeavor, a few silent words being sent between you both including him telling you to stop eyeing him up and focus on the meeting and you refusing and questioning why he's staring at you, your silent conversation would have went on if Aizawa didn't nudge you telling you to focus hey gave him a glare "don't tell me what to do" you growled and he just ignored you, looking back at Endeavor he was focused on the meeting again.

You sighed and put your attention back on the speaker but your attention wasn't at him, you started thinking about Endeavor and yourself, your memories together, even tho that was a distant memory.

Flashback

You panted running as fast as you could, the sun was blazing down on you with no mercy, you were sweaty and tired after an hour of this 'dammit dammit this is bad this is such a pain in the ass' "(y/n)! It's over you know!" you heard him call out behind you and started willing your body to run faster, you were almost there, just gotta- your eyes widened as he ran past you at an inhuman speed at this point "dammit! Oi get back here!" you yelled after him as he ran past the line and stopped, he stood there arms crossed staring at you triumphantly as you passed the line and put your hands on your knees panting, you looked up at him and stood up straight, he was panting and sweating as well, him having more stamina than you definitely proved to be useful in this situation "I win" he said smugly and you weakly glared at him half heartedly "damn you, how the hell do you have so much energy after all this training? It's so fucking hot!" he chuckled "I'm used to the heat little vixen" he smirked and you huffed "right right, so what should we do now?the rest of the class is still way in the back" you said straightening up as he smirked helping you and lead you to the benches "let's wait for them here it'll take them along time before they catch up to us" "true, we are the strongest in the class after all"

(character introduction by Mic)

Todoroki Enji Quirk:Hell Flame, he can create fire out of nothing and manipulate it to his will, it's useful in long ranged to short ranged attacks, while it's a very versatile quirk it has some dangerous drawbacks such as hyperthermia and burning the user. (we know the details ya'll.. Hehe... We're all Endeavor bitches here.... At least I know I am)

(L/N) (Y/N) Quirk:Demon Queen, she can transform into demon like creatures fully or partially (think Mirajane from FT... Even she has nothing to do with me coming up with this quirk) the demon form boosts her durability, strength and speed, she can also create shadow like substance that comes from her skin (this one is heavily influenced by venom yet I had the idea for a longer time and it worked in a different way), while the demon form is close ranged and strong in combat the shadow is long ranged and more versatile and can be used for sneak attacks, it is however weak against fire types which makes for a very interesting combat against Todoroki Enji.... Oi Shut it!.... Oh yeah she is also very hostile!... OI!, she also has phschokinesis and Telepathy

(I tried leaving the quirk blank as I hate it when authors apecify the quirk but I had to when I needed certain abilities for some parts... Sorry guys)

Enji chuckled "indeed" he sighed and looked at you as you threw aside your gym jacket remaining in your sports bra and gulped down some cold refreshing water "damn, sensei is really making us go through hell and back recently" you said stretching "well we're in UA after all, they're teaching us everything important" Enji said as he followed your every move, glancing at him you smirked "like what you see Enji?" he blushed slightly and got closer to you "so? What if I do? Can't I admire my beautiful girlfriend?" he said pulling you into his chest, while you both were sweaty it didn't matter to you, you smiled at him and pecked his lips (you're kinda tall ok, I assume he was shorter than this in high school) "oh I don't mind at all, as long as I get to admire my handsome boyfriend in return" exchanging a few kisses both of you were even more breathless now, just as it was getting more heated the idiots (your classmates) started arriving at the finish line, annoyed, both of you parted and glared at your classmates, while they were non the wiser as to why they were being glared at by the two most terrifying and powerful students in all three years of UA classes, they were deeply terrified and avoided you both in favor of keeping their lives.

"aright class that's it for today, as always Todoroki and (L/N) are ahead while-" you didn't really listen to the teacher talk and looked at Enji "so where should we go tonight? I wanna have some us time before the exams, we'll both be busy, especially that our agency has weird ass timings for summoning us" you said sighing "well there's a festival and it'll start tonight, maybe we can go I know you like those things, even tho they're filled with people" he said, you hummed thoughtfully then smirked at him "you mean I'll get to see you in a Yukata? I'm definitely in" he grumbled and sighed "yeah yeah, very funny, I don't get what you like about me in Yukatas anyway I look ridiculous" you chuckled "actually I love seeing you in a yukata you look very hot in them" he glared at you unamused "very funny (Y/N) very funny, you do know you'll have to wear a kimono as well right" he smirled as your expression turned into a mortified one "hell no" "its tradition my dear you'll have to wear it" you sighed hanging your head down, as the teacher dismissed the class "fine" you grumbled annoyed making him laugh in amusment " so cute I'll see you at the gates"  he said and walked towards the boys showers "OI who are you calling cute pyro? I'll kill you!" you yelled after him and he only chuckled in amusment at your outburst "I swear to God that jerk has a death wish" you grumbled heading into the girl's showers, meanwhile the entire class stood there watching the same thing that happens everyday that they should be used to it by now but every time they all gawk at your interactions like people would at a very unnatural show at the circus "guys... What kinda relationship do these two have? Are they supposed to be lovers?" one guy asked bewildered "I mean... I think? They're both demons all the time so I think this is demon love?" said one of the girls "this is so odd... They interact like they want to rip each other's throat out" said another girl "I'm too tired for this man, let's just go change and leave, I'd like to go to my very easily understandable life at home for toady" said one guy and everyone else agreed as the crowd left.

They have the right to think that your relationship is wrong and very odd, after all neither of you would show their true self in front of them, your affection and love is saved for behind closed doors, both of you are too proud and care about your tough image to show affection infornt of others.

These were the good times, neither of you knew what was coming your way, and how it'd shatter your relationship

That night both of you showered and showered and got dressed as you were doing your makeup you felt arms wrap around you "hey there" you said looking at your boyfriend in the reflection of the mirror "hey my love" he said making you blush and he chuckled at you "you done yet?" "nope, still have to do my hair" you said while putting on your eyeshadow, he humed and grabbed your brush and started styling your hair "hey... What are you-" you went to object by he stopped you "helping, I'll do your hair while you do your makeup, we'll be done faster" he said and you sighed "fine, just don't make me mess up" he hummed not answering and continued styling your hair, somehow you both worked in harmony and easily.

A little after you put the last touches on your makeup he was done putting up your hair and put a golden hair pin in it, one that you haven't seen before, you looked at your hair and at the pin fascinated by it "wow, this is... Really beautiful" you stood from your chair and turned around looking at him with a smile as he blushed lightly "I saw it and thought of you so I got it" he avoided looking at you in the eye you went up to him and kissed him gently "thanks love, I love it" he smiled pulling you in a hug, as you helped him with his Obi (the belt) he looked at you with such admiring look "what?" you asked feeling nervous from the staring "nothing, nothing at all just watching my hell queen" he smirked at you and you hid your face embarrassed 'damn him, knowing how to fluster me' "sh.. Shut up" he laughed pulling you to his chest as you both stared at each other's eyes exchanged a few kisses (your lipstick has sealing agent OK? OK).

A couple minutes later you parted, putting the last few touches you grabbed your stuff, phones, keys, wallets and went to the festival, throwing comments at each other like always, arriving at the festival you looked around watching all the stalls and couples and friends going around, it was too crowded which was a pain in the ass for the both of you, but you decided to ignore them and went around, gokmg around, trying foods, sweets and playing games, you getting extremely pissed at some people here and there, a lady in particular who was sticking her nose in your business "you know for a lady, you sure do have a filthy mouth" Enji said smirking "shut it ashes! She pissed me off" you said still angry "I don't mind, you're cute when you're angry my vixen" he said smirking making you blush and narrow your eyes at him "Todoroki Enji if you fear for your life you better stop fucking calling me cute" you said glaring at him, he put his hand on your head patting it slightly "there there, don't be like that I was just joking" you pushed his hand away and huffed, "you're on thin ice Endeavor" you said "is that so (H/N)? Well I better be careful then" he said pulling you to him, he was really warm "yeah you better" you said calming down and getting lost in his eyes as he leaned down kissing you.

Both of you slipped away to an abandoned side of the festival to.. Uhh... Stargaze yeah that... Nah ya'll did the horizontal tango.. Except it was vertical, as he held you up, your back on a tree for support. (I suck at writing smut.. Go to the festival smut Enji fic, I don't remember what the exact name was but the content is, you and Endeavor are dating, go to the festival, then hookup on a tree cause you ain't wearing panties, you aren't wearing them here either)

The festival went well You both had fun and teased each other competing over who's best at winning games and ended up going home with a lot of prizes.

Good memories are the best you can always look back at them and smile, but if you've lost the person you made the memories with, then they just become a painful slow poison that flows through you, slowly killing you.

It was during your work studies as third years when it started, you both went to the same agency, while the pro you went to was the top, he wasn't exactly a good person, extremely misogynistic bastard, who's ego is too fragile to admit a woman can be strong, which is why he despised you, like a snake he kept poisoning your boyfriend, filling his head with what he knew would get to him, tricking him into thinking you're using him, that he's getting weak cause he depends on you to have his back while fighting, like a devil on his shoulder he keeps telling him more and more lies, he made sure his plans are effective by firing you from his agency so now, student you had to find herself another agency, every agency in the same area accepted you by looking at your records, yet once they saw the name you were denied, you didn't understand why and remained without an agency for weeks which was bad for a third year, you found out that it was because of him he either bribed or scared all the so called pros from taking you, till one who didn't give a shit about him accepted you, the problem was, that you were four cities apart from Enji, which put the long distance strain on your already strained relationship.

It was a sunny day, unlike the cliché it was dark and stormy and raining, you both met after a long time apart, and while your convo started calmly, it quickly escalated to a full blown fight.

"YOU LEFT ME! YOU DECIDED TO GET AS FAR AWAY FROM ME AS YOU CAN! FOUR CITIES? WHAT THE NEARBY CITIES RAN OUT OF HEROES?" an infuriated Enji yelled at you, with the distance and how grueling the work was, you two didn't have anytime to meet at all, "Enji calm down for fucks sake! Allow me to explain I didn't have the time-" he interrupted you furiously "didn't have the time? What you're done using me? After everything! After everything that happened, how I trusted you, how I confided in you, how I always fucking ran to you when I needed someone! You don't even call anymore either! Not even a phone call, What you're bored of me now? You found someone else? Of course you did! You can't keep your legs closed you slut" you slapped him hard your hand hurt but it didn't matter, your heart hurt worse.

If only he listened, he'd have known it wasn't your choice to go so far.

"how dare you! How dare you accuse me of cheating you asshole! I'm always loyal to you because for some fucking reason I'm in love with you! You think I didn't try to be around you more? You think I didn't deprive myself of sleep for days just to take extra shifts and have the time to come back here for you? How can you claim to love me if you won't trust me? Did you forget what we went through together? How I always stood by your side nomatter what? You're a selfish greedy bastard who's only capable of loving himself!" you yelled angrily at him.

If only you knew, if only you knew, that this isn't his thoughts that this isn't his opinion.

Both of you not backing down both of you boiling with rage that's going to burn down your relationship like his beautiful quirk, that you loved so much and thought fit him so much, with his attitude and how he's always going forward like an out of control fire, he always seemed like a God of the sun to you, now his quirk was making him into Hades himself, king of hell and death, the one who shall drag you to hell to torment you for your sin of loving him.

"you're so fucking bold pretending to be a Saint! You're a manipulative bitch, You think you can just walk all over me woman? You're beneath me! There's no reason for me to stay with someone like you, who's going to set me back I don't love you this was all a mistake! An illusion I've lived in for so long" your anger disintegrated morphing into heartbreak and sadness, you two fought a lot, and while calling you a cheater and a slut hurt, you still had your love, you would forgive him like you always did, and likewise he'd forgive you like he always did nomatter how bad you both went against each other yes it was toxic, but both of you were broken, and this is how you functioned... But saying he doesn't love you is what actually broke you, what cemented this argument as the worst of your relationship, the end of it.

He seemed to realize what he said albeit too late, still arrogant you refused to cry in front of him "I hate you! We're over Todoroki! I wish I never knew you! I despise the day we met! I curse the day we became friends, you can go to hell!" and still arrogant Todoroki didn't try to take back what he said, and refused to show his hurt over you saying how you hated him and his existence, how this brought back some unwanted memories." great! Then We're over! Thank God" he yelled and marched past you.

Both of you broken, both of you saying things you shouldn't have said 'please comeback! I love you! I forgive you' you internally cried clutching your heart.

'just turn around, fucking turn around, go back to her she's your safety, go back to your angel.. You stubborn arrogant bastard!' Enji scolded himself, looking back he saw you walking away, head hung low, he knew he hurt you, as he willed his body to follow you, reaching out a hand he almost called out for you 'she makes you weak' he heard the pros voice in his head 'she's going to drag you down' 'she's using you' and although he knew non of this was true, he didn't call out for her, he turned around and continued walking, having the same internal fight with himself.

'comeback to me please! My sun!' turning around you looked at his retreating figure willing to calm out for him, yet to stubborn and too hurt to let word out, seeing him still walking away with such anger and intensity in his posture and such determination, determination to what? 'to get away from me? He's that eager?' your tears fell as the pain inside you grew, turning around you ran away, away from him, away from his pain, from his burning love that always felt welcoming now feeling scorching hot like it'll burn you to ashes.

Five seconds

Five seconds, was the difference between them, if he looked at her retreating form for five more seconds he'd have seen her turn around with a broken and longing, loving look.

Five seconds, if she's looked at him five seconds earlier she'd have seen him with his hand outstretched for her

Five Seconds

After hours of walking around aimlessly they decided to go home, well Enji did (Y/N) went to her friend's apartment which she had the key to, Enji sighed seeing the empty apartment they both shared, their home together, after going about their day like zombies doing their homeworks, training, studying like they're on some sort of auto pilot, they went to bed, alone for the first time in years, it really downed on them then, it's over, their home was gone, they both broke down, home was with their significant other, home was were they felt the love between the two of them, as they both cried alone, showing their hurt and weakness.

After hours of crying and begging for the other to come back, they both stared at the ceiling sending a curse to the heavens that broke them, that decided they didn't suffer enough in the past but had to suffer more, as Todoroki Enji looked at the small velvet box he was clutching onto, he opened it looking at the beautiful (gem) ring that he planned to give to her.. Well if she said yes of course "which you would have, wouldn't you my vixen", meanwhile said woman was curled in her bed unable to shed anymore tears, clutching her stomach she let out a dry chuckle that turned into a sob "it's OK my little angel, I love you, I'll always be here for you, sorry daddy won't be around, he's not a bad father I swear, I'm the bad mother, he... He doesn't even know you exist.. I'm sorry I know... He would have loved you"

Untold secrets, surprises that'd have brought laughs and tears of joy, brought pain onto two poor unfortunate souls that night.

END FLASHBACK

You sighed remembering these memories brought a heaviness on your chest, your refused to think about it anymore, otherwise you'd cry, now that would be hard to explain, why would the demon queen hero cry at a.... 'wait what are they talking about?' you thought focusing on them "while there's a massive increase in crime after the events of Kamino ward a couple of months ago in a lot of these areas there's a considerable drop in crime in these areas, we think it's due to the hero agencys there, as the zones are where the Endeavor, (H/N), Hawks, Edgeshot Miruko and lot more agencies and work areas are" 'ah right, crime stats, we're at that stage means next stage is... A word by the mentioned heroes... Great I wanna go back to kicking villain ass already, I have such high status cause I was doing my work not sitting in meetings.. This shit is useless, and seriously? You think? Of course it's because All Might retired AND was revealed to be a skeleton.. Haha... OK it's not funny... Nah it is... Speaking of which... I'm assuming Endeavor is pissed from becoming the top by default... Damn I hate becoming Two by default... Well damn... Would you look at that... Were where we promised No.1 Hero Endeavor, No.2 Hero (H/N)... Things didn't go as planned.. But we got there haha... FUCK! '.

You directed your eyes back at Endeavor, it hurt, really hurt, hearing on the news that he have been married, you really thought you could reconsile, yet he was avoiding you like the plague, like he hated your very existence, at first you decided to let him calm down and get his thoughts together, then you got busy with your child, after about a year his avoidance to you sky rocketed, he went from not looking your way for more than a couple seconds to totally ditch the room you are in the second you walked in, you pushed the thoughts to the back of your head and focused back on the speaker, and it was time for the heroes to speak, so Endeavor went first, speaking about efficiency and tactics and sidekicks, yadda yadda 'damn I forgot... He could be so boring sometimes... He's lucky I love listening to his voice anyway' you smiled slightly, not exactly listening to what he's saying more like listening to him, next was Hawks a new kid basically which wasn't here either 'heh kid can't even get to a meeting-oh dear I didn't just-... Fuck.... Damn kid is good tho he rose to the top real quick, good for him, if he keeps that up he'll pass All might himself... Now wouldn't that be cruel to Endeavor... And to me... That's gotta suck.. A kid surpassimg me? Heh yeah right' focusing now on other things to distract yourself from your memories you made a mental note to try harder somehow, maybe take on new districts, you were next, after making a comment about how you don't really like making speeches you went on and gave a small (kinda) speech, (can't think of anything) arrogantly expressing how good you are and how it'll just get better, you threw a few comments about being efficient and throwing shade on the other speakers while smirking at Endeavor who glared at you.

Later

"damn I am glad this is all over, I was starting to get a headache" he sighed walking out "it wasn't like you were focused (H/N)" you heard from behind you, turning around you came eye to eye with Endeavor, well chest even tho you were wearing heels and already tall, he towered over you (bruh like I'm 6'1... He ain't that much taller than me lol.. He intimidating tho) "well hello to you too Endeavor, what makes you so sure I wasn't focused?" you said crossing your arms, his eyes did a quick scan of you, you wore (idk choose what you want just make it formal, I hate when authors tell me what to wear lmao...) while you did the same to him" well you were too busy checking me out " he said crossing his arms as well, both of you not backing down 'as always' both of you thought.

"I wasn't checking you out, I was just looking" "for what exactly?" he narrowed his eyes "I don't know, to see if you're still in one piece, especially after all the madness that is Hosu and Kamino, that was kinda a bad situation while I was there in Kamino I wasn't in Hosu, All For One is a nightmare but Stain.... Its said he froze everyone with his blood lust" you smirked "well I handled it" he said growling "yeah I fucking saw that" you said "so.... How's it going? Other than the Hosu thing what did you do recently? And Kamino of course" you asked, he looked at you for a second as if thinking you're not serious about asking him but he sighed seeing you're serious "well, Shoto came to my agency for the internship, the school allowed first years to do them because of recent events" "right the USJ attack" you said.

"I heard through a trusted source that him and the green haired kid and the Iida kid are the ones who beat stain actually, right?" you said looking at him "how did you-" he was shocked then sighed "yeah, they did but because they didn't have their hero license they would have been expelled so it had to be covered up someone had to take the credit, and it happened to be me, I hate taking fake credit" he said annoyed "yeah, I know you always wanted to be the best by your own standards" you said and he looked at you with a soft expression, 'you always know me so well huh, can't believe some bastards actually think I took the credit because I wanted the fake glory' he thought while admiring you 'even after all these years' he sighed, you felt his gaze on you, as you fell into silence, trying to avoid the awkwardness you changed the subject "by the way Shoto doesn't seem like the type of kid to break the rules like that, and wasnt he supposed to be with you?" you asked and he hummed "the other two went there first then the Midoriya kid texted Shoto his location, he just left me on the street and ran there" he said shaking his head, you laughed slightly and nodded "yeah he seems close with that kid, especially with the sports festival fight" you said then suppressed a laugh "what?" he narrowed his eyes at you "nothing you're just kinda.... Funny.... SHOOTOOO" you said trying to copy him but breaking into laughter before that "OI... That's not suppossed to be funny" he grumbled "whatever you say" you said taking your breath.

You looked at him expecting him to be at least annoyed by your antics, yet he had a soft relaxed expression, you smiled at him "what?" you asked softly "nothing, it's just... It's been a while since I had a good conversation with someone" you smiled "really?, well good to know I'm up to your standards" you said, you two chatted for a while after that as you walked around the streets.

Endeavor couldn't help but crave you, your heart, your Love, your body, he wanted it all back, "and then that vigilante kid jumped into my fire to get the woman that was controlling the bees, I can't believe these vigilantes" he continued with the story you nodding "well it is reckless and out of the law to be a vigilante so I'll have to agree with you" you said as you both walked around, both of you having your hero suits with you, well... He just activated his quirk burning the suit to reveal his hero one underneath, now that shocked you for a second, while you (idk however you guys wanna do it, my OC has a pretty small suit... Kinda revealing lol.. So it doesn't take much space.. Can be carried anywhere... She also had it under her clothes.... Its kinda like League of Legends Jinx.. Kinda not totally).

You both attracted a lot of attention, and as always he just ignored them, you'd just wave at a random person, not out of accepting their over excited idiocy, but because you enjoyed watching them fall to the ground from how they're over reacting 'hehe.. Vixen' you thought, as he was telling you another story a bank alarm went off, both of you rushing there to stop the burglary but as you got there the thieves were all on the ground passed out, you both blinked in confusion, with your reaction time you should have gotten here fast "And next time think twice before breaking the law, because you'll find me in your way everytime, and it'll be over before you know it" yelled the hero that stopped them, flames engulfed her in a similar fashion to Enji's, her hair being on fire as well, her hero suit seeming to be the same as him except hers has the top half like a top showing her entire middle and arms, it worked in favor of showing her toned abs and biceps, while it'd have been inconvenient in the cold for anybody else, her flames eliminated that possibility " Fourth Rank Hell Queen Hero Inferno" Endeavor said looking at her "oh?.. ENDEAVOR SAN what brings you to my district? Oh and (H/N) too what a surprise.... wait what're you two doing together?" she asked jumping and landing infront of you two, standing at a height identical to Endeavor himself "pleasure to finally meet you, flame hero I gotta say you're my role model, we have the same quirks you see? You inspired me to become a hero" while you stared at both of them.

Endeavor heard what he always heard from his fans yet that girl wasn't being a fan girl, she spoke with bride and arrogance, she really meant her words yet she was professional and wasn't being an ass kiss like others, he took her outstretched hand shaking it "glad to hear it, more importantly glad to have a fan who can actually speak and use her brain" he said and she chuckled and smirked "damn must be my lucky day, getting such an acknowledgement, anyway what're you doing around here? You're kinda far from your agency, are you on a mission of some sort? Need a guide?" she asked "did neither of you really turn off your falmes on your hands?" you mumbled, both of them seeming to hear you they looked at you "flame heroes" said Inferno "(H/N) you're aware I'm fire proof right?" "right" you said wondering how she made him agree with her so fast.

"anyway... Why the hell didn't you attend the meeting?" you turned to her and asked her, she sighed "I was busy, every crook in the city lost their damn minds today" you said "it's mandatory to attend Inferno you could have left them to your sidekicks" she sighed "jeez Okaasan chill, I couldn't leave, my sidekicks are taking care of some things, there's just that much chaos around" she crossed her arms "right right still-" "besides if I went I would have just had to sit there while you ogled at Endeavor anyway" "OI! ZIP IT KID!" you yelled then glanced at Endeavor who gave you an amused look "wasn't staring huh?" he smirked "don't listen to her" "oh so you did~" she teased "NO!" "yes she did" "oooohhh damn" "shut up, and you need to catch up on what was said in the meeting" "you can brief me later woman"  she sighed "ne Endeavor San you were there as well right?" Endeavor looked at her " I was" "great maybe you can brief me too, ne tell me, not that I'm complaining but you don't talk to people that much, yet you're holding such along conversation with me, why's that?" Endeavor seemed surprised himself "me and your mother knew each other a while back we were just talking and then ran into you" he answered and she nodded Satisfied "wait... Mother... You knew Endeavor and didn't tell me? You could have let me meet him years ago!" she said " well we didn't talk for a while.. A few years that is" and as the conversation went on you guys stepped away from the scene, a totally different thought going through Endeavor's head and a similar yet different thought going through yours 'Okaasan? She's her daughter huh...so... Back then... '

FLASHBACK

A couple weeks after the fight they graduated high school and both of them focused on thier careers, she never came back to their apartment, they both had worked part time jobs and full time in summer since middle school and saved up, getting a good head start to their rent and the bills they'd have to pay, they'd have to work during UA and it'll be hard but they'll manage, as long as they get away from those hell holes, the ones they were raised in, wouldn't even call it home... It was hell, and they both escaped it into this haven they shared, well.. Not anymore.

As time went on, and as he realized how stupid his mentor is, it is true he depends on her on the battle field alot, but she depends on him too, they're both the power couple of the hero world Endeavor and (H/N) with how similar/opposing/complimentary their quirks are, they can deal with any situation with speed and efficiency no one else is capable of, he realized how he was a Fool for listening to his mentor, with a determined mind he left the agency after the day was over, walking in the cold weather, wasn't any trouble to him with his quirk, yet it brought a smile to his face thinking about her and how she loved (or hated if that's your preference) the winter, and the snow flakes, how even if she isn't cold (or cold) she'd still hold on to him wrapping her arm around his waist as he wrapped his around her shoulders, he smiled at the memories of them together, 'damn... We have a memory associated with everything' he sighed.

Buying her favorite flowers, a gift that he knew she'd like, at least he hoped she would with how mad she'd be at him, and a speech of apology that he prepared and embarrassimgly practiced, and the ring 'just in case' he thought 'just in case it all goes well, and I spontaneously propose I have the ring' he smiled, he really didn't mind if he'd have to beg for forgiveness, he acknowledged that he instigated the fight and escalated it while she was on the defensive, while he didn't let her even talk, he loved his Persephone and he'd throw away his ego for her.

Arriving at her house he sighed, it's been over a year, it shouldn't have taken me so long he thought, as he sighed going up the small steps and raising his hand to knock, he saw something that made him freeze on the spot, like his blazing quirk was replaced with ice, through the window by the door, he saw his beloved, as beautiful as ever with a child in her arms, an infant, a very small one at that, she smiled at the baby in her arms as she cooed softly for it, he couldn't see them clearly but there was someone sitting on the other side of the couch, 'no... That's not it, she's just babysitting or holding the baby for one of her stupid friends' he thought trying to convince himself that it's not true, as his thoughts raced he was interrupted by the cries of the child, he watched them again as she pulled the child closer to her chest giving it her nipple as it started feeding and stopped crying, it hurt hurt like having every bone in his body broken, hurt like he overheated himself 10 times over, hurt like acid running through his veins, with all the pain and heartbreak all common sense escaped him, that the child may be his, it looks like it's a couple months old, he failed to notice that the shadow of the unknown third party is her annoying cheerful friend who for some reason have always been at their home, she didn't even chatter with them she would just stay there with them. (best friends be like... Your home is my home too ha).

Turning around he walked down the steps, his fury so intense that his quirk burned uncontrollably disintegrating the gifts he brought for her, except a single red rose that he had added to the flowers collection ironically due to a comment about his hair from her, the red rose had Slight burns on it and it laid on top of snow covered in ashes.

Five Seconds

Five seconds, If you looked at the window by the door five seconds earlier you'd have seen him.

Noticing a sudden brightness that disappeared outside your friend looked at you questioningly, the light seemed to grab your little girl's attention as she stopped crying becoming fuzzy as she twisted around in your arms reaching her hands up curling her hands in a graby motion, you shushed her as your friend went to check.

Walking outside (F/N) saw the rose and the ashes she realized what might happened, and as she contemplated it she realized that if (Y/N) finds this she'll be broken again, she'll go after him and he won't even let her explain, they'll fight again and he'll abandon her again, seeing her broken for the first time was painful enough, she sighed picking up the rose and tucking it away in her jacket creating a wind draft that blew the ash covered snow away "what is it?" came your voice from being her "is something out there?" you asked looking at her "no... Its nothing" she said closing the door.

Shrugging you went back to calming down your baby "you look so much like your daddy, my sweet little burning flame, my Kouen" you sang to her softly putting her to sleep, she had her dad's hair and eyes, she was stubborn even as a baby, she was born prematurely and heavily underweight, which is why she looks so small for a 6 months old, the doctors told you she might not make it but as you spoke to her daily in the incubator, telling her to fight and live, she kept fighting and you managed to return home with your baby, your reminder of your lover, such an amazing thing you two created, oh how you wished she met her dad, how you wished to see him carry her "you are looking for him aren't you? You're wondering where daddy is, God you'd have been such a daddy's girl" you cried as you talked to her.

If only... If only he rang the bell that day, if only your friend told you what she found then maybe, maybe it'd have gone differently.

END FLASHBACK

By now you had walked to Inferno's agency and went to her office (look ya'll gonna be having some conversations that don't belong in the streets OK? OK)

"So Okaasan?" he asked "hm? Oh right, (H/N) is my mother, what didn't tell him you got a kid... Damn that's cold" "hush "Endeavor San did she tell you about me?" "she didn't" he said looking at you "it didn't come up" you said, "oh OK then... if that's the case allow me to reintroduce myself, the Hell Queen Hero Inferno, daughter of the Demon Hero (H/N), no clue who my dad is tho, never met the guy" she said shrugging, "Inferno, that's enough" Endeavor seemed intrigued "you never met your father?" "nah never, mom says it's complicated" she shrugged, both of them looking at you "what?.. What do you want? I'm not opening this subject again Kou" "Kou?" Endeavor looked at her "ugh dammit woman! The Name's Kouen or Kou-Kun, Kou sounds too soft and childish" she crossed her arms "Kouen, enough" "Kouen? Like flames or prominence" Endeavor asked "hm? Oh yeah like that she wouldn't tell why she named me that either, gotta have to do with my flame quirk" she said emphasizing on it by manipulating her flames, turning it off as well.

"see? I do have hair I just choose to keep it on fire" Endeavor stared at her, now without her flames he can see her more clearly, the red short hair on her head, not a shade different from his own, her sapphire eyes that had the same shine to them, her facial features while feminine yet harsh, resembled his own way too much, the confident posture, the way she talks, somehow.. Somehow his same attitude, "interesting... so if you don't mind me asking how old are you?" he said "oh I'm 28 mom had me at 18.. Kinda irresponsible don't you think?" "irresponsible indeed" he said and she nodded turning her flames back on " yeah, she said she knew my quirk since I was born, good thing she went after my fire quirk not Demon Quirk, as you might know I have a hybrid quirk, her Demon and Flame, would have been weird" she said (Her quirk is a perfect mix, she has the perfect hybrid quirk) "agreed, so (Y/N) care to join the conversation?" Endeavor said looking at you who was standing there silently, you sighed "yeah, going the fire way was the right call" "you guys are on first name? Damn what'd I miss?" she asked "Kouen dear... Care to go over there for a sec? I need to talk to Endeavor about something" you said using your authoritive voice, even tho it was rarely effective "why? What do you wanna talk to him about all of a sudden that's a secret?" "Kouen please.. Now" you asked again "Inferno, care to give us a moment, I have something to ask her too" Endeavor said and she looked at him and sighed "sure thing, I'll be over there, just yell for me when you're done" with that she walked away.

Endeavor looked at you questioningly crossing his arms "so you have a daughter, a flame quirk daughter who's 28?"

You looked at him quietly, guilt and anxiety filling you " yes.... I do" you sighed "and she doesn't have a father, never met him and you never told her who he is" "I didn't want her to go chase him, in case he didn't want her, I didn't know... What he wanted" you sighed looking down, taking a deep breath you looked up at him, instead of anger or anything of the sort you saw patience, and hope "is she..." he asked, not dating to complete the question in fear of disappointment in case if the universe is just that cruel to him "she's your daughter" you said "I was pregnant, that day.... I was going to tell you... But then we had that fight and I just... " you took a deep breath "I didn't know what to do, whether to tell you or not, not like you'd listen to me anyway, you started avoiding me after that" he sighed "I did, God... I can't believe that I... Missed Twenty Eight years of my daughter's life.. Yet again... It was my fault" he said looking to the ground "Enji no... It was both of our fault, we should have listened to each other, we've always been so.... Aggressive and hot headed, we dug our own graves basically I should have told you maybe... "  "I knew" he interrupted you.

"what?" you looked at him, he hung his head down, taking a deep breath he looked at you, regret and pain in his eyes "I went to your house, over year after it all ended, I nearly knocked but then...then I saw you, sitting there with someone next to you, sitting there with an infant in your arms you looked so happy and content, with some other guy, with his child, Cobra's (your work studies Pro) words ringing in my ears, that you're not loyal to me, that you used me and didn't love me."he said looking at you" even... I even went to you that day cursing him and his teachings, his false ideals, cursing what he did to us, you know I found out he fired you? He told me that you quite" he  said "God you're such an idiot you know that?" you sighed then looked at him "I know" he said looking at you "wow he even admits it" you smirked.

"That day... When you saw another guy with me... You didn't really see them right?" you asked he looked at you confused shaking his head "thought so, well that was (F/N) she was staying over to help me take care of your very fuzzy stubborn ass daughter, damn she's stubborn as hell as you can see" "I should have checked, I should have known, I KNEW that you're loyal to me, just I should have asked you" he said, his flames all going out "man you really deserve a slap for all this, or a punch" you sighed shaking your head "you're right, I do, you can go ahead I was a terrible boyfriend, an even worse father to her, and to my other children he said taking a deep breath closing his eyes and opening them again.

"later, not in front of your daughter.. Now why don't you go introduce yourself?" he looked at you shocked "what? You're not mad at me? At all?" "No, I'm not..we've already spent so long mad at each other, look where it got us, let's just throw away all the anger and just... Live, and you're not off the hook yet... your next mission is to go to your daughter and tell her you're her dad, to be fair I do have a lot of the blame, when she was a child she connected the dots, how we were in the same year and how she's basically a copy of you, and the quirk.. God... She didn't even ask she straight up Said 'Endeavor is my dad' and I spent the entire day proving her wrong... So it's not only on you and damn is that kid smart"  you said crossing your arms sighing.

he looked at you in shock "so she knows?" "pretty sure she does, she's just pretending to have bought my lie" "right" looking behind him he looked at her, she was standing at the other end of her office looking at you both intently, waiting for this 'talk' to be over, Endeavor signaled her to come over and she walked to you guys "sooo... That looked deep... This isn't a business talk at all... Looked personal" Kouen said she stood in front of you "no it isn't" you said "Enji?" "more first name basis? Wow" she said looking at him "Inferno... So I don't even know how to say this, and I'm terrible in these things but... Look Me and your mother used to date in high school, we broke up, due to my mistake and.... I'm your father I know I haven't been there for you at all, I don't have the right to ask you to forgive me but I'll try.. I'll try to be the father you imagined me to be a hero that you're proud of- huh" not letting him even finish she hugged him "I've always been proud of you, that's the first thing I told you when we met dammit" she said holding on to him tightly, "you didn't know, when I met you today I knew it's my chance to reveal who I am to you, that's why I told you all that ya know? I ain't that chatty with people" Endeavor stood there not knowing what to do for a second he was shocked, but slowly he wrapped his arms around her, pulling you close as well the three of you stood there just holding each other.

The heavens are done punishing him, the heavens are done punishing you, apparently now... Now you can be together, even if it's a bit complicated.

TIMESKIP

Kouen met Shoto and apparently they both bonded, in some weird way, Natsou and Fuyumi as well "well we lived in the same house as him yet we didn't see him so there isn't a difference between us at all" Natsou scoffed "Natsou that's not appropriate! Come on" Fuyumi said "it's OK, Fuyu don't worry about it" Kouen said "he's stating his opinion" they all talked for a while before Kouen had to excuse herself "sorry guys I have to go, I have a meeting with Hawks and Dad in Kyushu, you guys are going to your mom right? Want me to drop you off?" she asked "no it's OK we got it" Natsou said "You don't wanna be late for meeting up with Hawks right Ne-chan?" Fuyumi teased making the older girl go red "O...Oi shut it... I'm going to meet dad not that fried chicken" he flames turning on Fuyumi giggled as Natsou wiggled his eyebrows "ah huh right right, more like a hot fried chicken" Natsou said "JUST GO ALREADY YOU TWO" she yelled making them laugh at her while she marched away from them using her flames she propelled herself forward flying to Kyushu (ya know like FIRESTORM in Flash and Legends).

LATER

The attack goes the same with addition to Inferno helping in slowing down high-end when Endeavor was temporarily down, put getting tossed onto buildings as well, and her helping with the flying up cause she's fire proof unlike Hawk's feathers, she separates right before he turns hood into a mini sun, in her fall she notices Dabi in the distance, yet when She lands she ig ores it to make sure dad is fine first, cries tears of joy when he's standing, goes to him and is ready to smack a hoe whne Dabi shows, he isn't fazed until Miruko shows up like what happened in the Manga.

TIMESKIP

A couple weeks after, Endeavor leaves the hospital, While Kouen didn't have the same injuries as him she got a pretty bad hit which endangered her life, the heavens decided to be merciful again and let her live and walk out there with HIM "you know, mom is going to kill us right?" Kouen said, Endeavor shook his head "that's what I'm dreading" he sighed making her laugh at him as they both went home, Endeavor still lived at his house but he'd come to their house from time to time, now he went their cause (Y/N) said she'll take care of her two heroes "after she kicks their asses she means" Endeavor muttered as they reached the house, as they got in (Y/N) told them to rest, not five seconds later they both had to dodge the chancla (lmao) "dammit woman!" they both said simultaneously "nuh uh, you two don't get to sync on me! And you two don't get to get THAT injured on me" smacking both their heads hard she returned to making the food as they complained about her hitting injured people.

You sighed making them their dinner, normal homemade ramen for Enji, a death penalty of spicy ramen to Kouen, you smiled softly hearing them talking about how she's too rough on two injured heroes in the line of duty, sighing your thoughts drifted to his other kids and his wife, yes you knew their story, yes you knew what happened but you couldn't help but feel you're stealing him from his wife somehow, like you're the bad person, but yet again what happened to you two wasn't fair, the cruelty of the universe stole him from you so you shall steal him back, you're fighting a war, a war with destiny, and you shall win, it's fair right? Yeah it is, you grinned its all fair when it comes to love "it's all fair in love and war my love~".

After dinner was served you guys just rested all day, with them both asking you for stuff "I swear to God you two sound like whining 5 year Olds" you said getting them another thing, five minutes later they were about to ask you something "next one who asks for something ridiculous I'll break another bone of yours!" you threatened shutting them both.

.

.

"love you" both of them said and smirked at you

.

.

"fine what do you want?" dammit.

TIMESKIP

The window opened as the mysterious figure climbed in through with ease, looking at the peacefully sleeping woman, with hatred, she looked so beautiful, so perfect, so disgusting!

The figure grabbed the woman with ease covering her mouth, as she struggled she couldn't break free, she couldn't move, they were so strong, everybody peacefully asleep, unaware of the horror that's happening, looking at her attacker her eyes widened, she was in shock, her attacker smirked, the white haired woman tried to scream but she couldn't, the gloved hand that covered her mouth wouldn't let up "hello Rei-San" said the (h/c) woman with a sickeningly sweet smile, "you might be wondering why am I here... Well... Let's just say this... After so many years... I've been reunited with the love of my life and I won't let anybody get in my way... You are an obstacle, unfortunately for you... I'll have to get rid of you" you sang as you knocked over the base that held the beautiful withering flower "what a shame.... You were also doing so great... But you had a sudden psyche break.... And you decided to... End it all... End the pain" you sang sweetly, using your quirk to control her, her struggling stopped as she got up quietly, tearing down object after object, throwing around such precious letters that she had, pulling her hair, scratching her self, she looked down grabbing the broken shards of glass, she looked at you with hopeful puppy eyes, too sweet innocent, with such fear behind them, begging you to let her go, you nodded go ahead and she smiled "yes Master" she said in a sweet obedient voice, looking back down her hands, she brought the glass to her wrists and started cutting, cut after cut after cut till her arm was covered in cuts, then her other arm as tears slipped passed her fearful yet giddy eyes, her white clothes were covered in beautiful crimson color, her legs were next, looking at you again "come on baby.. Don't be afraid, it'll feel good I promise~" she smiled again, grabbing the pen from the floor she held it tightly in her hand making a string fist, pushing it full force she stabbed her eye, pulling it out she looked at you "master" "it's OK baby go ahead~" you smiled in approval, with a grin she aimed the pen again "thank you Master" she said in her cute obedient voice sending the pen through her other eye, pulling it out she dropped it to the floor "Master?" "I'm here. My sweet pet.... Now sit there like a God dog" "Hai" "dogs don't talk.. Hmm... Oh I know... We can just.." Raising her hand with the glass she stuck her tongue out, pushing the piece of glass through she cut through it till it was off, vocal cords next, somehow knowing where to cut exactly, reaching the glass she started cutting through them, choking on her blood and beading out, she sat there obediently, as blood and tears fell from her eyes, "good girl... Now.. Die" she sat there for a couple more seconds then dropped dead, drowned in her blood and having bled out, as the crimson surrounded her, you almost felt jealous " don't worry my little puppy, you can keep (F/N) company in hell hehehe~"

Going out the window like you came in, leaving no trace at all of your existence you smiled as you looked at the moon "my beloved is mine now... And mine alone"

TIMESKIP

You were sitting in the living room watching the news, this being your day off, you looked up at Enji and smiled "hey my love, come join me" he smiled at you, drying his hair having just came out of the shower, he only had pants on, as you admired his strong muscles he sat next to you, giving you a sweet kiss unlike the passionate ones you usually shared "you looked at him and smiled "what? You seem to be in a very good mood today did something happen?" "it's nothing" Enji answered looking away "I just... I'm happy... I got you back my Persephone" he said making you giggle "my beloved Hades, I'll always come back for you" cuddling closer together you decided to find a movie or something to watch.

Later

You both just sat there, watching movies, and messing around... Doing some adult Tango, you were both just relaxing when Enji's phone rang, you both ignored it for a while but then he looked at it due to the persistence of the caller, looking at it he saw Shoto's number he answered "SHOOTOOOO" you put your hand on your mouth to cover your laugh "what is it?" "come to mom's hospital quick" came Shoto's panicked voice "what?.. Why what's going on?" "I don't know, I came to visit her but they won't let me in, there are police cars around, they're saying I shouldn't go in there" "OK... Calm down... I'm on my way" hanging up he got up to get dressed, you looked at Enji "what is it?" "I don't know, Shoto called from the hospital there's something wrong" he said sighing "SHOTO'S AT THE HOSPITAL? Is he hurt? Is one of kids? Was it another villain attack?" you panicked, he smiled, God he loved how you worried about these little kids it made his heart flutter, then shook his head "no they're OK, they're at Rei's hospital, he said they won't let him in and there's police cars around" you looked at him shocked "shit... Is Rei OK?" you asked "I don't know that's what I'll have to figure out" he then looked at you weird "wait... Did you just ask if Rei is OK? And with such concern?" you huffed "we're actually friends just so you know" you crossed your arms "is that so"he said watching you get dressed" yes, we talk a lot.. I go there when I have time... I'm coming with, I wanna make sure Rei is alright" "alright then hurry up" you glared at him as you quickly got dressed "well excuse me my suit isn't as easy as yours" soon you both left for the hospital, one unaware of what awaits at their destination, the other playing her act very well.

Later

Arriving at the hospital the three kids were standing there anxiously as the fourth was trying to calm them down "guys, come on it may just be because of the recent villain attacks and all that" Kouen tried calming them down, the second you two walked in they all ran up to you "Oyaji make them tell us what's going on in here?" Shoto started immediately " I got this, calm down, where is the person in charge here?" walking up to Rei's doctor after spotting him "what's going on here?" he asked him "what's with the police and preventing the kids from going in?" the Doctor looked at them with a sad and devastated look, "sir, there was.... Something happened yesterday, during the night, we're not sure what may have triggered her but-" the Doctor was evading, getting impatient Natsou stormed past the guards taking them by surprise unable to stop him, like a domino effect, he was immediately followed by his siblings, and Enji and you, reaching the room first taking a look inside " Okasa- huh?" he froze, a look of terror in his eyes, "Natsou what's wrong?" Shoto reaching him second he looked inside and like his brother he froze, Kouen was next seeing the scene before her she was shocked, snapping out of her trance just in time to pull Fuyumi's fave into her chest to stop her from seeing, but she got a glimpse, and it was enough to throw her into tears "w... Wait.. What.. What was that? O... Okasan?..what" as Kouen hid her sister's face both you and Enji stared in shock at the scene before you, the scene seemed to be out of a horror movie, a nightmare the the silence was deafening, till a scream of pain erupted from Natsou, followed by Shoto, and Fuyumi, your tears just falling silently "Rei... What the hell" you looked at the doctor grabbing him by the collar "what the hell happened here!" you glared at him, it wasn't a question, it was a a demand for and answer "she... She did that" he fearfully admitted "what?" "the hell are you talking about?" as he now got attacked by the questions of everybody each yelling and screaming and demanding answers "I don't know... We found her like that in the morning, she seemed to have some sort of psyche attack, it's undetectable, it happens to a lot of people from different ages, and lives and jobs, she destroyed everything around her then did this" he fearfully let out "destroyed everything? That must have made a lot of noise, why did nobody check on her?" Endeavor asked glaring at him "I don't know, I wasn't here at night" "then who was" Inferno asked glaring at him "I don't know.. I don't know" "there isn't a single drop of blood in some of the scattered things, the ones further away from her, the destruction was done before she bled, meaning if you Checked the commotion you'd have caught her before she did anything" Inferno stated, while that increased the chaos, it wouldn't change anything, she's gone.

At the funeral, a lot of tears were shed, a lot of pain and anguish, a lot of perfect acting, a lot of comfort for the hurting friend, that lost her new friend, a lot of comfort from her beloved.

If only, if only on that day (F/N) told you what she found, then Rei would have lived, then these kids would have been yours, if only she spoke, then she wouldn't have been in hell with Rei.

FLASHBACK

"(Y/N)... Come on stop..." your friend struggled, "then tell me, what're you hiding" you said, holding her tightly "I'm not hiding anything" she said struggling to get away, your quirk was way more superior to her air manipulation, she could only manipulate small portions, while your demon quirk did a lot, "yes you are" you said, using your quirk you put her in a trance, "confess" "It was my fault the dog got out, I left the door open" "dumb bitch, Kouen will kill you" "yeah, but I'm more scared of you, you'll kill me of you find out" you narrowed your eyes at her "if I find out what?" "that I didn't tell you... About Todoroki" you looked at her now curious and angry "what about him? (F/N)" fear filled her eyes "that he he came here" "WHAT?" you see in shock "the hell did you do? Why did you never tell me?" "because he left, he saw you with Kouen, he saw you with the baby, I think he thought it isn't his and that you moved on so he left, when I went out to check that flare of light, I found ashes, all over the snow, I found a single half burned red rose, so I hid it it, I hid it all, I knew you'll run after him, I knew you'll fight and that he'll break your heart again I couldn't" she said crying, you looked at her with anger and hate "so he came here! Before he moved on, before he married and you didn't tell me, that's why he started avoiding me so much, he thinks I moved on from him, now he's married, and has two kids, my chance is gone.. Because of YOU" you yelled in anger releasing your control "please I was just trying to help-" "silence!.... 7 years! 7 years I could have had him! 7 years we would have lived together! And for more years to come! You're a fucking whore! What were you jealous of me? For having a lover? While nobody even looked at you?" you yelled "that isn't it! I was just" "just what? Worried about me? I've always fought with him, that's how we always have been, you tried using your brain, that's the problem (F/N) you're a stupid bitch who ruined everything!" your friend cried "I just tried to help" she got up to leave but froze, your control on her again "now where do you think you're going?" you looked at her smiling maniacally "we're not done here"... 5 months.... 5 months you tortured her, 5 months for the 7 years she took away from you, you would have went longer, but she was too weak, and died.

If only

If only, you didn't try to play the hero, General studies trash 'if only you trusted my strength and told me what happened... Then we wouldn't have gone through that'

END FLASHBACK

Everybody went home that day, depressed, questioning what happened to her all of a sudden, the havens are really cruel huh... They had to take such a delicate loving woman in such a cruel way, as each one of them ran to their lovers for comfort, one woman was in no need of comfort, for she was a demon in human disques.

TIMESKIP

This is after the Endeavor hero agency arc, after the Ending attack.

Man you felt tired, it's like you were frozen but it was quit the opposite, you layed on the ground coughing as blue flames surrounded you "how sad... Hero" you heard the teasing voice of Dabi "you really are weak.... Don't deserve your rank at all" he said pinning you down sitting on top of you to prevent your movements, "look at you.. So pathetic" "if you're gonna kill me then do it already, a hundred other heroes will take my place, and bring you down" you grunted and coughed out blood, Dabi looked at you shocked for a second then laughed maniacally "man that is good... That is good (H/N) they usually, beg for their lives by now.. But no actually, I'm not doing this to stop the heroes.. I'm doing this to hurt him" he grinned you looked at him shocked "what?" "well killing you will hurt Endeavor badly, I'd have gone after the one that looks like him but it's harder to fight fire with fire I have other plans for her anyway I need her alive for them.... oh? Don't tell me you don't know? Well I'll explain to you, before you die you have the right to know anyway.... " ya'll insert his reveal and the message that was broadcasted by the hacker guy it's too long to type and this is too long already.

" so... As you can see here... Dear beloved woman of my father killing you will hurt him, and her, her flames of revenge will burn bright, as she tries to kill her mother's killer, would she have the heart to kill her dear brother? Would dear dad let her? Would he stop her? Or would he join her? Would his perfect creation Shoto take his brother's side? Or would he take the side of a half sister he just knew and a father that he despises, what about Natsou... And Fuyumi too... Oh and Okasan you know it's wormg to try and steal a married man? Well I'm not one to judge...hahaha.. A lot of possibilities here, too sad you won't live to see them" as he spoke he started burning, stronger and stronger, by the time he was done it was excruciating, "you're... wrong" you coughed "huh?" "you're wrong Touya" you smiled at him, a maniacal smile rivaling his own, paralyzing him... "What the hell is wrong with that woman? She's insane" "you made a big mistake Touya~" you sang his name, he froze 'the hell?' "what the hell are you talking about? Why aren't you screaming in pain? Why aren't you dying!" "hahaha hahaha the thing is... You just threatened my darling, and I just..... Can't let you live to do any of that haha haha" you laughed pushed him off, fear crawled up his back, paralyzing him, as you walked closer to him, the flames burning your flesh you just grinned at him "wh... What are you!" "me?... I'm the demon dero my dear... What exactly did you think demon hero meant?" he leaned down towards him "those who fought me, and were worthy, got to see it, my other form" you laughed looking at the scared Dabi "don't worry it's not that baad~ my beloved Enji saw it before, he said it's not scary" you grinned as your form shifted, into a much taller creature, it was covered in shadows, eyes glowing red, sharp massive teeth glowing "demons are made of fire Touya~ we don't burn in fire, we strive in it, we crave it!"

Dabi stared at the demon in fear as the demon reached its claws for him, just before he was grabbed, a portal opened suclimg him in, the demon screamed in anger, losing its Prey, its OK.. However... It'll get its chance again someday.

After All

All Is Fair In Love And War

Right?

"...... After All Touya is such a beautiful name~" Dabi or Touya sang as he danced on top of Machia "come dance with your son in hell Endeavor"

.

.

.

"... I really enjoyed what I did to Hawks actually... It was very satisfying"

.

.

.

Meanwhile the broadcast explained everything, including the illegitimate child of Endeavor, and the scandal with Endeavor and (H/N)

As Enji just froze, and Shoto fought, Kouen was torn between her revenge and her brother, her family... They wouldn't want her to kill Touya.

As the battle progressed she made up her mind, she'll get revenge, for Her lover, he hurt Hawks, he destroyed his quirk, he tarnished his image, he nearly killed him, he put him in pain and suffering.

It wasn't fair, what happened to him, but she'll fix it. She'll kill Dabi for him.

After All

All Is Fair In Love And War.

END ?

DAMN FINALLY!

(I don't specify a gem as you can choose your fave as I prefer rubies due to their intense red color... With a black band instead of silver.. Introducimg my dream ring lmao... Also in Japan proposals aren't the same as in US and other similar countries but this was a more obvious way of showing the events)

[mostlysignssomeportents]

Maidan in Belarus

Alexander Lukashenko is president of Belarus: they call him "the last Soviet dictator." He is responsible for  decades of brutal human rights abuses and comic mismanagement, and he led a coronavirus response that was so inept, it even made the US look good by comparison. Lukashenko's not even good at being a dictator. His master plan to maintain the pretense of free and fair elections this year involved purging the establishment candidates running against him, "businessmen" running on a ticket of "efficiency." He also purged a popular anti-corruption Youtuber. This left only one opposition candidate  at the fore: Svetlana Tikhanovskaya, running as a proxy for her imprisoned husband Sergey Tikhanovsky. https://jacobinmag.com/2020/08/belarus-lukashenko-protests-election-results/ Tikhanovskaya was a powerful rival to Lukashenko, who has used populism to style himself a champion of ordinary Belarusians - the sort who might have looked skeptically upon business leaders promising to replace him. But Tikhanovskaya ACTUALLY champions causes important to everyday Belarusians, winning support from the country's workers, as well as political freedoms like a release of political prisoners and free and fair elections. Her platform was so obviously, visibly popular that it led many to predict an imminent change in power in Belarus, a new Maidan moment. So when Lukashenko stole the election, claiming a brazen 80% majority, the people rose up. For days, larger and larger crowds have taken to the streets, demanding political change, braving vicious police violence that only seemed to inspire larger turnouts. Lukashenko's claims that the protests are driven by outsiders have not convinced anyone. The perseverance of the protesters is a moral lesson to everyone else in the country - including, incredibly, some of the police who had been beating and gassing them. Even though 6700 people have been arrested and tortured, the protesters keep facing down police lines. Military officers, appalled by the crackdown, are posting social media videos in which they destroy their uniforms. Police officers are giving media interviews in which they proclaim their unwillingness to follow "illegal orders." The interior minister went on TV to formally apologize to the protesters for their treatment. And 50 riot cops dropped their shields and embraced the protesters, switching sides. https://www.cnn.com/2020/08/14/europe/belarus-protests-riot-police-intl/index.html Solidarity is a powerful force. Everyday people always have more in common with each other than we do with our leaders. Getting your soldiers to shoot the other soldiers is one of the hardest problems in any military. Many people know the story of the Christmas Truce of 1914, when German and British soldiers emerged from their trenches to fraternize in no man's land, singing carols, playing football and exchanging gifts. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Christmas_truce Less well known is the utter horror this provoked in their command structures, the generals who took every step possible to avert such an occurrence again. Something like the scene in Belarus was on my mind when I wrote the climax of my 2017 novel Walkaway (I won't give away any more spoilers). For me, the ultimate lesson here is that the two sides are "bosses vs everyone else" - not "everyone vs the bosses' shock troops." So much of the status quo depends on people who should be on the same side fighting one another on behalf of  minorities of powerful people, who, while formally opposed to one another, are only contesting who should be dictator, not whether dictators should be abolished. Image: Serge Serebro, Vitebsk Popular News, modified https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Alexander_Lukashenko_President_of_Belarus.jpg CC BY-SA: https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/4.0/deed.en

[yukisohmasmokesweed]

chapter 84 is the best chapter of fruits basket and you can’t change my mind

chapter 84 is the chapter where we finally get the full story on yuki’s childhood. at this point in the story, yuki is doing better; he was able to admit to himself that he will “open the lid,” but that he doesn’t have to push the issue, and that he loves tohru and feels safe confiding in her. this is relevant to chap 84 because of its framing device: yuki confiding in kakeru. immediately before this yuki gets trapped in a storage closet and knocks over a bucket of paint, causing a flashback that triggers a panic attack. the fact that yuki feels comfortable and validated talking to tohru makes him feel like he can talk to kakeru as well, which is a big step for yuki, who, up until now, has been extremely private.

this is, hands down, my favorite chapter of fruits basket. it is artistically stunning, emotionally poignant, and an unbelievable insight into yuki’s character and the effects that neglect and emotional abuse can have on a person. now join me as i analyze......nearly every single page in this chapter :)

the third page of this chapter indicates something very important: that we are in yuki’s head. not just that the chapter is yuki’s point of view, which was indicated on the first page through narration, but that we are literally seeing from his eyes. the angle of the servant’s hand and the wideshot of akito are both from his sightline. in this chapter we are yuki, without the bias of kyo, akito, or ayame, the lenses we have experienced yuki’s childhood through so far.

fruits basket’s costume design is impeccable in general, but i especially love the choices in this chapter. i love the juxtaposition of akito wearing a kimono against yuki’s western suit. i wouldn’t say fruits basket is a story about east vs west, but i would say it highlights traditional values clashing with modern ones. yuki is going from his mother’s world, a character who we only see wearing western-style clothing and living in a fairly western-style house (for a sohma, anyway) to an uber-traditional setting that, for yuki, becomes a cage. it’s worth noting that the very next time we see yuki, he is wearing a formal kimono.

(akito, shigure, and ritsu are the only characters we see wearing kimono in everyday life. from a functionality standpoint, it’s because kimono are expensive, cumbersome, and in modern japan, very formal. that being said, yuki would have grown up during the lost decade, where showing off signs of wealth was frowned upon. akito seems to be the only one who wears kimono regularly during the height of the lost decade, though japan was still struggling economically into the early 2000s, when the majority of fruits basket takes place)

this little scene is one of my favorite scenes in all of fruits basket. it’s gorgeously drawn, and encapsulates what it meant to be yuki sohma before meeting tohru better than anything else in the manga. 

i don’t think it’s a mistake that yuki is wearing western-style clothing here; in the page right before this one, he witnesses some servants speaking distastefully of kyo, and i doubt this is the first time he’s heard someone speak of kyo this way. even as young as he is, i think he knows that talking to kyo is taboo, especially for the rat. yuki has never been accepting of his role in sohma family’s traditions, and speaking to kyo in it of itself is a small act of rebellion. he is stepping out of line in the only ways he knows how.

the fact that kyo is an outsider is not just a metaphor here; he is physically standing outside akito’s room, excluded from the new year’s celebration inside. yuki, who in the pages previous had just had it established to him that he is not wanted by his mother, 

his brother,

or the other zodiacs, 

thinks maybe, maybe, this other boy who has also been thrown out and rejected by his own family could understand him.

the next page takes us out of yuki’s head for a moment to show us his reaction to kyo’s words. the low angle highlights yuki’s defensive position, shoulders slumped and hands pulled into his chest, versus kyo’s solid stance, feet shoulder width apart and hands balled into fists at his side. 

in kyo’s first close-up, he is silent, just another wide-eyed child. but here, he has become the cat, pupils slitted and teeth bared, screaming the exact words yuki does not want to hear. kyo’s humanity is conditional to the other zodiacs, and for kyo, the same goes for yuki.

i am never not impressed by takaya’s ability to show emotion. it reminds me of how those big, fat, overwhelming ghibli tears look the way crying feels; that is what this expression is to me. hands curled protectively over his front, flushed and wide-eyed and at a loss for words—i know exactly what that expression feels like on the inside. it’s so intimate and immediate, and we are instantly pulled out of it by the jarring slap from his mother, a panel with no color grading, backgrounds, or faces.

yuki himself is so shocked by this that we are abruptly pulled out of his point of view, looking at his mother’s angry face through a medium shot, yuki’s own reaction obscured by her jagged dialogue.

i think kyo’s outburst makes yuki desperate; if even the cat can’t accept him, then his own estranged brother must be the only option.

the first shot on this page is from yuki’s sightline, looking up at his tall, bright brother, followed by ayame’s view of a much smaller, shadowed yuki that is partially obscured by his own panel. takaya loves using negative space, and i think it is especially poignant in this panel. the majority of this shot is negative space, the gap between yuki’s hand and ayame’s arm swallowed by the rest of the empty background.

i want to go back a few pages to talk about these panels in conjunction with the ayame page. this is the first we see of ayame in this chapter, and if you put the two pages next to each other, it is as if he is completing the action of looking over his shoulder at yuki, revealing his entire face, and then hiding it again. i also think it’s interesting that shigure is looking at yuki dead in the eyes, looking somewhat bored and somewhat amused. in a previous chapter, though, shigure does say this to ayame:

i do like that shigure seems to be the only one paying attention to what is going on with yuki at this time but also chooses to do nothing about it, instead using it as a jab at ayame.

and then, after yuki’s classmates approach him, there’s a pretty big change in tone; shojo sparkles, the silhouette of children playing against a big, wide sky, sun-dappled buildings and smiling faces. up until now the outside world has been featureless and empty; now it is detailed and nostalgic, and yuki’s face is clear and unobstructed. then:

yuki’s carefully impassive face gets cut off gradually by the panel borders

until we can’t see it at all.

the next three pages proceed the same way, his face obscured by the angle, his hair, or borders.

until, finally, we are allowed to see yuki’s face, after being rejected any form of human kindness or affection from literally any person in his life, fading into the darkness of the sohma estate, trapped inside the proverbial sliding door.