#hen party liverpool

[toopeanutcrown]

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[emmashouldbewriting]

Observations from night one in Liverpool:

-Cities are loud. And busy. And bee-daw bee-daw siren-y.

-Buses are surprisingly frequent.

-I wonder if the lady threatening to 'knock your fuckin' head off, you prick' earlier was given back her bank card.

-I hope the hen party who were singing happily earlier are having a smashing night.

-And I hope the gentleman outside asking if anyone is gonna call ghostbusters gets an answer.

I miss my resident owl already. I'm not cut out for this. LOL

[calypso-finale]

Hundred Twenty.

London traffic makes me angry, like this shit is just a waste of time and I hate it, I always like to do stupid shit but I have the police parked right behind me in this traffic so I am just sat here waiting with Rylee on the phone, I mean we aren’t speaking but I am just here, she is talking to someone so I am waiting really “ok sorry, I am back” she said “you know what, I actually hate the way wat you say Tion name, it sounds slutty, as you say” Rylee snorted laughing “shut up!” she spat “I was baffled you use that term, slutty, that sounds weird coming from you and that accent of yours” I miss her, she has been in Italy for two days now “well blame my friends, what can I say but do you seriously think I sound slutty saying his name? Be real, I am more like telling him to do his job” I sniggered “I am joking, but what he do, I thought you like Tion. That day when I called you a dickhead, he was side eyeing me and glaring at me like I was the opp” looking in my rearview mirror, I swear I wish the police weren’t there “well he is protecting his woman!” she spat “oh woman? Oh is it, right now there is a bunch of girls in the car next to me and they are looking, I am going to put the window down just to piss you off” Rylee gasped “I was joking!” she can shout all she wants, putting the volume down “nah, you annoyed me now” putting the window down “alright” I said, the scream they let out “damn, relax. It’s ok, y’all good?” I asked, “traffic is jarring isn’t it” oh they recording now “it’s the best thing, I love you so much and you’re better in person, oh my god!” the girl said “that is funny, thank you. Y’all ain’t from around here?” I questioned “we just came to London for a hen party! We are from Liverpool” letting out an oh “I heard about you Liverpool girls, wild” I grinned “we party the best Cench” nodding my head “I bet, but I appreciate the love, I could hear you chanting my name for a while now. I just didn’t want to have people peeping and that you know, it’s all love” waving them off, putting the window back up “you’re a dick” putting the volume back up “then don’t chat shit then” finally this shit is moving “mhmm I didn’t mean it, you was flirting and I know you was smiling from the way you was talking, I am not happy” switching lanes because I want to get rid of the police really “then we can be not happy together, it’s romantic” I laughed to myself, she is pissed off and I know it.

Rylee has stayed on the phone with but quiet “I am here now you know, so we equal?” she scoffed “well whatever, why did you do that?” she asked “because you literally called Tion your man, I don’t know this guy! I don’t care, he was mean mugging me the last time I peeped, like I don’t care. You could like this guy, how do I fucking know?” she went silent on the phone “fine, ok I did annoy you so you’re at the place then? Is my dad there” seeing him get out of the car with Aziel “he is here, whatever though” I shrugged “Oakley, please. He does adore you a lot and he does feel bad, let him talk to you and make it up to you, do not be stubborn and make him the victim, please. Listen to me in things, this is what I know. Just let him do the running, he knows he fucked up and he did bad just don’t talk down to him please, for me. I know you pissed off with him but please” I sighed out “alright, I am going now. Talk later if you can, don’t work too hard with Tion” I had to mention it “shut up!” she spat “I love you, I miss you so much” grabbing my phone from the handle and getting out of the car “I love you too Lee, you have to see me as soon you land babe” Aziel ran to me “that isn’t for a few days, but I will call you tonight your time, bye” disconnecting the call “I missed you! Where have you been” I always love when he holds my legs, like for him that is a hug “I am home!” he spat “well not my home was it” picking him up “I have missed you, you know that” he nodded his head “papa here” he pointed “I can see, you ready for boxing? Get all that pent up naughtiness out of you” he grinned “hey” I said to Chris “what’s up?” he said back “you got his bag?” I asked “oh yeah, it’s here” I am going to keep it neutral with him.

I chuckled at Aziel, him skipping is the funniest thing but he is trying to do it, the trainer is trying to get him to comply but his legs ain’t doing it “he is funny” Chris said “he is” I added “I can tell he appreciates these moments, the way he looks over to check you’re still there to watch him, that’s love” nodding my head “well this is on my list as the first thing to do with him, I rather stay here in London so I can do this with him, instead of him hitting kids he can learn discipline, it’s nice” Aziel ran over to us “big workout today” he is huffing and puffing, passing his water to him, he pointed “I punch now” I think his favourite part is his little fists punching those bags “you’re Chris Brown” some child came over to us, Aziel looked at him “you’re Cench” he pointed “no my dad, and it’s papa” he put his foot down with that “your dad is him” he pointed “this my dad” ran into me “my dad” reaching over to the kid and dapping him “I peeped you out there, you good” he smiled “thank you” he said “go on, go” taking the water bottle from him “he is too proud of his pops” I sighed out “yeah, I mean it’s whatever, I don’t think it’s hard to be better then my own dad, you know. He ain’t shit really is he” I said “Oakley, I am sorry” he apologised “it’s fine, we can be cordial. It’s just ruined init because them two are still texting, so allow it. We can’t be what we are because your daughter reached out to Juke, and that ain’t something you going to like so I think for Rylee we be cool for that” looking at him, he ain’t liking what he is hearing “he showed me the message and she messaged him first, I just don’t want it. So us, the bond we had we might as well forget” Chris put his head down “ok” he just said, he can’t control his anger and what is even the point in it, we can just be cordial, I know him as much as he knows me, and I know he is big mad now.

Aziel wanted to go for ice cream, but he wanted me there as well, this kid is annoying because I am having to be here with Chris even longer “Oakley” Chris said, looking up from my phone “look, you know I don’t give a fuck about anyone, I do not care for anyone besides my own, but I care about you, I came here not to babysit Aziel, but for you. I look at you as my own and I am sorry, I am sorry I came at you the way I did; I am sorry I wasn’t there for you with your dad. I let you down, I know I did and that hurt you because you needed me, I know Oakley you are let down by me. You needed me even if you didn’t verbally say it and I wasn’t there, I wasn’t there in Guyana with you and then when you came back, you saw me, and I came at you. I regret it, my regret is I came at you, and for that I am sorry. Come on man, I know you. I hung out with you for too long to know you, you needed me, and I wasn’t there. You did what you needed to do for him, look I am fed up. I can’t keep chasing these grown girls anymore, or be beating people up, I am done. I saw red with Juke and yeah, I did knock him over, it was stupid of me, but you and I know I do a lot for these girls, but I can’t do anymore, Imani is the last of it and I am done. Emi, I hope I am dead because I can’t do it anymore. I haven’t even apologised to Herb, I punched him, but I came to you because it’s upsetting me to know you feel that, you lost your dad, and you was falling apart, and I promised I would come but I came to you like that. Oakley I am so sorry bro” I swallowed hard “I have so much care for you, you know that. Tell me, I want to hear it” I know what Rylee wants, I don’t want to make her life difficult either, but I know Chris cares, he is genuine.

I huffed out “look Juke is what he is, but he is my only brother. And it does take two, when you came to me about Rylee, and that all happened I took it yeah but with Juke he isn’t me, I knew where he was, as much as he is what he is, he can be led astray, this is why I got blame when he got stabbed he is stupid. Imani was to blame too but she didn’t get that, she got a little sprinkle of shouting, but you didn’t show that guy that came to the apartment when Rylee was pregnant and shouting, knocked me out, Imani got a holiday, but my brother could have been killed. I get it, you can be angry all you want, you have a right too, but she is of age, and she isn’t a stupid girl as you all make it seem to be, Juke comes to me, he shows me, he said to me he is scared but she is at this point harassing him, putting it on him. I uhm, I ain’t her dad, and you can do as you please, but I know Rylee been through a hell of a lot more with you then any of Ti and Imani put together, I was there, I saw it. You wasn’t even there for him, the hate you held for Rylee was deep, but you was hurt, I took that, but you don’t think that hurts Ti and Rylee, you let Imani off with it, people around got hurt instead. I am upset with you Chris, because at that time I lost my dad and so did Juke, you wanted me to lose my brother, you could have punched him instead really. Then you came at me, fucked up way too, that hurt” Chris is silent, he ain’t mad at all “I did need you, you right, I needed you to tell me fucking relax, but you wasn’t, and it’s happened now, but like maybe time will heal thing but things will change in many ways, and at the end of the day we will have a connection more then ever now, including Juke” I take Chris’ silence as he knows I am right.

Chris nodded his head slowly “I have regrets with Rylee, even when Robyn called me and told me. I did say she was dead to me; I wasn’t there for the birth, I wasn’t there for any of it, you right. I did a lot of things to her; I wanted her so hidden that she didn’t exist. She is scarred from pregnancy because of me, from her pictures to baby shower to her being hidden. It was calculated by me to her mother and fed down, I made everything hell, and yeah Imani is being let off lightly more than the older two, because I don’t know how to punish a girl that doesn’t understand, I don’t Oakley. I am sorry, I am sorry that I am this way. I took it too far, honest truth but we don’t know what to do with her, that is a decision we still thinking of. I am so proud of Rylee and Tianna, both of them girls. But see it from my point of view, my guy you was older then her, I was mad, but I did take it too far. And I treated you like my son, and I still do. I just want us to go back to how we was, I do. I promise to not ever do that to you or Juke, I won’t, if I do see him again. No matter, he is your family” nodding my head “and not being there for you with your dad, I am sorry” I took in a deep breath “wasn’t worth you coming though, you never came did you” I questioned “you say that, but I wasn’t worth the flight, was I? You took care of me through cancer, I see you as more, my dad wasn’t there for me, you was when I had cancer, when I needed you for other shit, but you didn’t come for that. Allow it though, just allow it” I got up from the chair “I will be back” I said to Aziel.

Aziel is just so quiet, but I feel bad “I am proud of you, you won the award. I posted you on my page” I turned my phone to him “me!?” he spat “yes, and Dave said he big proud of you too, and he can’t wait to see you soon” he grinned “I am so proud of you with how far you come with that boxing venture, you putting in work too son, I see it” my son is so happy “the family is coming down” he said to me “yeah Lee was saying” I mumbled “Oakley, I do need to make it up to you, I was wrong. And you did expect more of me minus the whole Juke thing, I never did come, and I wasn’t there. You lost your dad, I get it. But hand on my heart, and it sounds soppy, but I love you a lot, you my own” looking at Chris “I get it, but you should be aware that Imani is still in contact with my brother, she messaged him first” I want him to know that “I don’t care about that” he is upset about what I have said really “Aziel, Chris is going to take you home ok. I have to go now, dad has things he needs to do with Slawn and the gang, give me hug” he got up from the chair “I call you please” I chuckled “yes you can call me, you better say goodnight to me alright” hugging him “big proud of you though” pressing a kiss to the top of his head “see you soon ok” he nodded his head, looking at Chris “see you soon” Aziel hasn’t let me go yet “I miss you” I cooed out “so do I but I need to go now, so please” he sighed out “bye dad” he is so cute “won’t be gone for long” walking off, I do have things I have to do, that ain’t a lie with all that.

Sitting next to Walid, he is editing my thing. I am excited for it “look what Ed said though” he clicked on the clip “Central Cee my boy, and Rylee. It was such a pleasure to be in the moment with you and wish you both the best” I cooed out “and Wadz” he clicked on the clip “I am going to try and keep it short from the sandpit to now, bro I am so happy for you. It’s a different thing when you come from where we come from, love was never on the list and was never going to be easy. To see this, I may shed a tear and Rylee, you make my boy happy and you are always welcoming when I see you, so yeah. I love you both a lot, and Aziel. We excited, see mom and pops married yeah” Aziel nodded his head smiling “he like I do not care I am out just out with the boys” he laughed out “this is cute, like to see all the thing, appreciate it. Oh she is calling me” answering Rylee call “are you in bed?” no hi or nothing “I am with my friends why? You feeling a little heated” Walid snorted laughing “oh why would you say that with boys there! Maybe but it doesn’t matter now, you affected my dad, what did you say to him?” Rylee is on heat, why didn’t I go Italy “I said what I had to say, like I am hurt so I had to say it, what he say?” I wonder what he said “that he feels really bad, that his behaviour was too much, you spoke like a grown man to him, he seen a change” rubbing the back of my neck “well I am entering the next stage of my life I have too, but I also did it for you, because I know you want us to get on so I had to say it, but if he is upset about then maybe he has took in what I said” Rylee sighed out “true, why aren’t you home, asshole” she is big mad “because I am not, just use a picture or something, I am sure you have some” which she does “no I wanted you to talk dirty to me with that British accent, ugh. I hate you” she is a trip “you’re so stupid” I laughed out “no you are! You could have spoke some nasty shit to me, I needed it” I can’t stop laughing “stop it” she is making me go red, she is crazy.

[celeste-i]

remembering once I was high in Liverpool and suddenly a party bus drove by with a bunch of screaming laughing drunk women on a hen do dancing at the top and filming everybody on the street including me. scariest thing to happen to me I think

[markwatkinsconsumerguide]

Consumer Guide / No.126 / MONDO TRASHO - a 5 piece psych, garage band hailing from Liverpool - with Mark Watkins.

MW: When did the band form and why the name MONDO TRASHO?

Jay Muat: We love obscure films and counterculture and weird things. Russ Meyer and John Waters were big influences when starting off. We got the name from John Waters, his first film from 1969. We were inspired by the Mondo movement of the 1960's. We wanted the word Mondo in the name of the band and so ended up with Mondo Trasho. 

Chris 'Moz' Green: I like to to say, although this is not a true translation, that the world is full of rubbish. Me and Jay got the band together years ago. Its been an ongoing project. Losing a few drummers along the way. I feel now being 5 piece and the way the band sounds / feels is what I've always wanted it to be.

Dan Myers: I joined about 2 years ago. I knew the guys were looking for a guitarist through my old band mate Jack Birch, from The Heavy North. I got to listen to a lot of live recordings and demos. 'Strangers' really stood out to me; it made me want to join the band. 

MW: What are the band's influences and describe your sound...

Chris 'Moz' Green: Inspired by the grandiose of 60's Scott Walker, the growl of like, The Doors, and weirdness of Frank Zappa, and The B52's, and the obscurity of the Flamin' Groovies. We started out being inspired by The Flat Duo Jets, The Cramps, The Doors and the sound has grown from there. We've added more of a garage punk sound and it has grown and evolved from there.

Jay Muat: I'm really into Love, old film soundtracks, Giallo (lounge type music), The La's,  Pale Fountains, Ennio Morricone. 

Dan Myers: I got into a lot of blues stuff when I was younger like Peter Green, and also early Black Keys, Queens of the Stone Age and Black Rebel Motorcycle Club too. Over time that's broadened into more cinematic stuff.  

MW:  Who does what in the band, and who supports Liverpool, Everton, maybe even Tranmere Rovers?!

Chris 'Moz' Green: I’m Chris 'Moz' Green I play Hammond organ & electric piano backing vocals sometimes play the Theremin. Not a football fan, I was raised a Liverpool Fan. 

Then you’ve got Jay Muat - vocals & guitar, but he’s not really into football at all. 

There's Dan Myers - guitar & backing vocals. He’s a Red. I reckon he cried when the news about Klopp broke but wouldn’t admit it to us haha. 

Luke Hamilton plays bass and does backing vocals. He's not really a football fan, says he's a blue nose (he goes the game). 

Finally, Greg Mitchell on drums. He is just a normal Everton fan.  

MW: What do you like best about Liverpool? The least? What do you think are some common misconceptions about its citizens and the city itself?

Chris 'Moz' Green: It's a weird place because it's in a constant flux. There's always new buildings or things shutting down (mainly good live music venues). You get used to places being there and one day it's gone ("There are places I remember"...as the Beatles song goes).

It is a music city. There's loads of bands doing different music, getting signed, doing tours and that. Not everyone is a Beatles mop top fanatic. It's a boss place. Some of the people are boss. Liverpool has become a city break / Hen and staff party and University city. Worst thing is football match traffic - the whole of north Liverpool goes nuts on match day.

MW: Top 5. What are your favourite surf records of all time?

Chris 'Moz' Green: Of course we all love: Link Wray, Dick Dale,The Lively Ones, The Centurions, The Jokers, Freckles, The B52's and The Del Roswells. Top 5 are hard, but;

5. Anything by the Razorbills. More people should listen to this band. They are just a great band. Everything they do sounds amazing to me. Wish I could see them live. 

4. The Impacts - 'Wipe Out'. Always sounds great, my go to for decent surf.

3. 'Unleashed' by The Eliminators. When I first heard the album I was like woah! how did I miss these from the 60's. Amazing instrumental surf boss horns. 

2. Guantanamo Baywatch albums are boss. Modern surf bands who are solid. We were lucky to play with Night Beats last year and he was touring with Chris Scott the drummer from GB - my jaw was on the floor watching him.  

1. 'Lolita Ya Ya' - The Ventures. I never get bored of this track, the harpsichord is boss. Fits into any playlists.

MW: Top 5. What are your favourite psych records of all time? 

Jay Muat: Honourable mentions: The Animals, (some) Pink Floyd, Grateful Dead, The Kinks, (loads of) Frank Zappa, 'Abbey Road' and more modern stuff like Triptides or Levitation Room. 

5. The Seeds / 13th Floor Elevators debut albums. Just  really good albums I remember finding both of these when I was 16 and thinking I'd unearthed rare gems.

4. Nuggets compilation - it's just boss. Got loads of amazing tracks on it from bands who deserved to be massive. 'Don't Look Back' by The Remains is such a good tune; it introduced us to so many great bands. When writing songs it's always worth at looking for references. 

3. Love's 'Forever Changes' (1967) - just perfect. 

2. The Doors' first 3 albums taught us so much. When we first started we didn't have a bass player and 'Moz' just played bass on the Hammond. It's the blueprint for us. 

1. 'Freak Out' by The Mothers of Invention (1966). I know it is a parody by Frank Zappa of the bands of the time, but it's the best. It's an album that has everything. It stays with you after the first time you hear it. Goes from absolute scary freak outs to Blues Psych. 'Help I'm A Rock' is an go to always. Love putting that on when with unsuspecting company...

MW: What did you think of the recent Brit Awards?

Chris 'Moz' Green: I didn't really watch it. You knew that Raye was going to win loads which is boss for her. But award shows are just the big music labels just pushing shoehorning their artist in. It's just a big advert now. It's too big, too monoculture for me. It's not what it used to be: I mean seeing Jarvis with Michael Jackson. That would never happen again, everyone is too well behaved at the award shows. 

Dan Myers: I didn't even know it was on, in all honesty.

MW: Do any of you enjoy playing darts and, if so, to what degree / ability?!

Chris 'Moz' Green: Me and Luke are darts players. Luke is the better player, but I played a lot when I was a teenager, having a dart board in the house. Playing round the clock for years getting ready for the pub tournaments.  

We played a lot when we used to work with each other. We worked with a fella who made his own darts out of m10 bolts and nuts, because modern darts were too light for him. It was funny to watch until he wrecked every dart board he used, and we got kicked out of pubs.  

Luke's really good under pressure. I'm better after 4 pints. 

MW:  Who usually gets the beers in and what tend to be your tipples?

Dan Myers: We're pretty good at getting round in. Think it's Greg's next!

Chris 'Moz' Green: Dan's a Guinness drinker. Luke likes a heavy stout, Jays drinks cider, Greggs into Lager and 'Moz' is into red ale and Belgian bevys.

MW: What are MONDO TRASHO's plans for the rest of 2024?

Chris 'Moz' Green: We have a lot of tracks recorded that need mixing. We were very lucky to get sessions in the George Martin studio at LIPA with our mate Jamie Lindberg. It was a good experience but because life gets in the way its taken a long time to get each song ready. 

Jay Muat: Release more songs, reach more people.

Mondo Trasho | Twitter, Instagram | Linktree

(c) Mark Watkins / March 2024.

[pinkfluffysocks]

In Liverpool for the weekend. It is wild. Complete culture shock 😂

In the first 5 minutes the following happened:

Got pointed and laughed at by some lads for wearing a fanny pack.

Got pointed out by a party bus of women on a hens party’s with a giant inflatable penis and called beautiful.

Almost got stabbed in the eye by flying shrapnel when a seagull decided to steal a wine glass with leftover fries stuffed inside and promptly dropped it.

And finally marvelled over the amount of women with bright orange tan, the longest fullest fake lashes that I can’t see their eyes, and huge over filled lips wearing various iterations of fluoro pink/lime green pant suits, wondering if we really are the same species 😂

[executiveuktravelcomblog]

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[jadeburtonn]

My hen do 💍 I’m the luckiest person on the planet tbh 😍💘🥹 next stop mexicoooo

[thinkhostel]

Hen Party

It is well known that Liverpool is one destination that is definitely recognized for being extraordinarily exciting and lively; which means it is suitable for a hen party! The Beatles originated from Liverpool, all the same, it has much more to offer. Liverpool is becoming increasingly popular with people who are planning to enjoy a weekend that they may never wish to forget – such as a hen party!

Therefore when you visit Liverpool and pull out your checklist you will usually have tasks such as- Must See/Must Do :

• Visit all the free museums in Liverpool • Go and visit everywhere The Beatles are famous for christening. • Head over to Liverpool Football Club and catch a game • Visit Mathew Street especially if a festival going on. It is a great hen party destination • Go and visit Southport and enjoy a bit of beach action If you are arranging a hen party, yet not sure how to start? Adding a few hen party activities to help make those closing moments of independence all the more unforgettable? To help you get the ball rolling, this article has fantastic Hen Party Ideas which you could choose from. We have put together a bunch of fun hen party activities that the whole group will love.

Shopping:

The Cavern Quarter features the best shops, the top products as well as the best pricing also.

Nightlife:

When it relates to Liverpool, the night scene is absolutely where it’s at.

Eating

& Drinking:

There are many eateries and places to have a drink all around Liverpool no matter what the budget. There are many pub grub type restaurants to enjoy as well as lots of alfresco dining places available also. Below Are Some Popular Hen Party Ideas: 1. Spa pampering This has always been a favourite way to unwind and relax. 2. Cocktail Making Learn how to make your favourite cocktails with Fun interactive team games with the ladies. Then eat and enjoy the making these memories.

3. Pole Dancing These venues provide Professional dance instructors for Fun and confidence boosting lessons. Discover new moves and even wow your hubby to be! A lot of people nowadays view pole dancing to be THE new dancing craze a lot like the boogie in the past. For those who have dreamed of learning to pole dance like a pro. , set free your inner seductress and get an expert trainer to coach you! 4. A Day at the Races This could make for a fun day of sophisticated gambling with 4 onsite bars, as well as 3 on-site restaurants. 5. Chocolate Making Learn to make professional looking chocolate truffles with a professional. This is especially for chocolate lovers. Learning to make your own and even taking your chocolate home!

6. Single Ladies Dance A Professional dance instructor will teach you the moves from the popular “Beyoncé” hit song. Perfume Creation Photoshoot Champagne Tasting Nude Life Drawing Party Bus Boat Party Hunk and Hotties • Adonis Cabaret • Butlers in the Buff

Read more: https://bit.ly/2tIAJiY

[apreciousheart]

Massive congratulations to the beautiful bride to be: Evangeline! (@evangiiee ) Celebrating you this past bank holiday weekend has been such an incredibly fun & memorable one! I’m so thankful to have known you for 6-7 years & to call you one of my closest friends ever! You’re fabulous dahling in every way & it’s been a blessing to have known you throughout the years! Thank you for always being so classy, kind, patient & inspirational😊 Meeting the rest of these girlies has been the absolute sweetest ♥️ Can’t wait til your big day soon! 👰‍♀️ P.S. John (@jchawner1 ) we bagsy “Angels”- Robin Williams or else it’s gonna be stags vs hens at the wedding 😂💪🏻 #hendo #henparty #bridetobe #wedding #party #stagdo #henpartyideas #liverpool #bride #hendoideas #bridetribe #henweekend #birthday #love #ynwa #lfc #bridesmaids #hen #babyshower #drinks #cocktails #birthdayparty #mane #salah #henpartyfun #liverpoolfc #henpartyplanning #bridalshower #anfield #firmino (at Yorkshire) https://www.instagram.com/p/CdF6KRBDsyj/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

[citydanceparties]

City Dance Parties Line Dance Masterclass!

Line Dance Class clips from some of our fabulous Line Dancing hen parties who have danced with us! Visit Us: https://citydanceparties.co.uk

[johnminnion]

On the Waterfront

Some of us got out in the fresh air this week and did a bit of sketching down at the waterfront.

Above by Steve

Above by John

Above by George

Above by Maria

Above by John

Above by Paul Gatenby

Above by Sung Wei An, a passing Taiwanese boy (aged about 8) who was invited to draw in Maria’s sketchpad.

Above by Steve

Above by George

And there’s always a hen party.       by Angela

[macybeckham7]

idk why this popped into my head (probs cause i haven’t slept) but drunkenly getting robbo’s name tattooed on your wrist or something, and you don’t remember until you see it the next day and you freak out and he asks if you’re okay and you just show him the tattoo and he just takes the piss whilst you’re just sat there crying over it

You were completely hammered during your sisters hen party, when you woke up the next morning you felt like you had been hit by double decker bus about 1800 times. You managed to lift you 1000 tonne head and felt a tingly feeling on your wrist, you gently rubbed it but it didn’t feel any better.

You rolled over and looked down at your wrist and saw ‘Robertson’ and a heart tattoo on your skin. Your eyes widened and you tried to scrub it off thinking it’s just marker but nothing happened, it was very much staying. You let out a small sob as you try again to desperately get it off your skin, Andy who was in the shower got out and poked his head through the door.

‘Oh morning sleepy head’ he smiles. ‘What’s wrong?’ He asks.

You give him a glare before you carry on trying to scrub the tattoo off. You let out a frustrated groan as tears fall down your cheeks.

You put your arm out to show Andy the tattoo, he didn’t make a noise so you look over at him with him bursting into a fit of giggles as you cried. You punched his arm but that didn’t seem to bother him one bit as he carried pissing himself laughing.

He wraps his arms around you letting you have a meltdown on his shoulder as he quietly laughs to himself.

‘Hey, this could go one of two ways, either I’ll have to marry you to give you my name or you could just say you’re a massive fan of the sexy defender at Liverpool, once we go our separate ways’ he jokes making you laugh for a half a second before you are crying again.

[aion-rsa]

How All in the Family Changed the TV Landscape

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All in the Family is roundly considered a touchstone for television achievement now, but when it debuted 50 years ago, even the network carrying it hoped it would fizzle quickly and unnoticed. CBS put an army of operators at phone lines expecting a barrage of complaints from offended middle Americans demanding its cancellation. Those calls didn’t come. What came was a deluge of support from people hoping this mid-season replacement was a permanent addition to the network’s lineup. The premiere episode contained a considerable list of “television firsts.” One of these rarities continues to remain scarce on network TV: creator Norman Lear trusted the intelligence of the viewing audience. To celebrate All in the Family’s 50th anniversary, we look back at its journey from conception to broadcast, and how it continues to influence and inform entertainment and society today.

Actor Carroll O’Connor, who was a large part of the creative process of the series, consistently maintains he took the now-iconic role of Archie Bunker because All in the Family was a satire, not a sitcom. It was funny, but it wasn’t a lampoon. It was grounded in the most serious of realities, more than the generation gap which it openly showcased, but in the schism between progressive and conservative thinking. The divide goes beyond party, and is not delineated by age, wealth, or even class. The Bunkers were working class. The middle-aged bigot chomping on the cigar was played by an outspoken liberal who took the art of acting very seriously. The audience cared deeply, and laughed loudly, because they were never pandered to. They were as respected as the authenticity of the series characters’ parodies.

Even the laughs were genuine. All in the Family was the first major American series to be videotaped in front of a live audience. There was never a canned laugh added, even in the last season when reactions were captured by an audience viewing pre-taped episodes. Up to this time, sitcoms were taped without audiences in single-camera format and the laugh track was added later. Mary Tyler Moore shot live on film, but videotape helped give All in the Family the look of early live television, like the original live broadcasts of The Honeymooners. Lear wanted to shoot the series in black and white, the same as the British series, Till Death Us Do Part, it was based on. He settled for keeping the soundstage neutral, implying the sepia tones of an old family photograph album. The Astoria, Queens, row house living room was supposed to look comfortable but worn, old-fashioned and retrograde, mirroring Archie’s attitudes: A displaced white hourly wage earner left behind by the social upheavals of the 1960s and 1970s.

“I think they invented good weather around 1940.”

American sitcoms began shortly after World War II, and primarily focused on the upper-middle class white families of Father Knows Best, Leave It to Beaver, and The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet. I Love Lucy’s Ricky Ricardo, played by Cuban-American Desi Arnaz, ran a successful nightclub. The Honeymooners was a standout because Jackie Gleason’s Ralph Kramden was a bus driver from Bensonhurst (the actual address on that show, 328 Chauncey Street, is in the Bedford–Stuyvesant section of Brooklyn). American TV had little use for the working class until the 1970s. They’d only paid frightened lip service to the fights for civil rights and the women’s liberation movements, and when the postwar economy had to be divided to meet with more equalized opportunities there was no one to break it down in easy terms. The charitable and likable Flying Nun didn’t have the answer hidden under her cornette. It wasn’t even on the docket in Nancy, a 1970 sitcom about a first daughter. The first working family on TV competing in the new job market was the Bunkers, and they had something to say about the new competition.

Social commentary wasn’t new on television. Shows like The Twilight Zone and Star Trek routinely explored contemporary issues, including racism, corporate greed, and the military action in Vietnam, through the lens of fantasy and science fiction. The war and other unrest were coming into the people’s living rooms every night on the evening news. The times they were a-changing, but television answered to sponsors who feared offending consumers. 

Ah, but British TV, that’s where the action was. Lear read about a show called Till Death Us Do Part, a BBC1 television sitcom that aired from 1965 to 1975. Created by Johnny Speight, the show set its sights on a working-class East End family, spoofing the relationship between reactionary white head of the house Alf Garnett (Warren Mitchell), his wife Else (Dandy Nichols), daughter Rita (Una Stubbs), and her husband Mike Rawlins (Anthony Booth), a socialist from Liverpool. Lear recognized the relationship he had with his own father between the lines.

CBS wanted to buy the rights to the British show as a star vehicle for Gleason, Lear beat out CBS for the rights and personalized it. One of the reasons All in the Family works so well is because Lear wasn’t just putting a representative American family on the screen, he was putting his own family up there.

“If It’s Too Hot in The Kitchen, Stay Away from The Cook.”

Archie Bunker dubbed his son-in-law, Michael Stivic, played by Rob Reiner, a “Meathead, dead from the neck up.” This was the same dubious endearment Lear’s father Herman called him. The same man who routinely commanded Lear’s mother to “stifle herself.” Lear’s mother accused her husband, a “rascal” who was sent to jail for selling fake bonds of being “the laziest white man I ever saw,” according to his memoir Even This I Get to Experience  All three lines made it into all three of the pilots taped for All In the Family. When Lear’s father got out of prison after a three-year stretch, the young budding writer sat through constant, heated, family discussions. “I used to sit at the kitchen table and I would score their arguments,” Lear remembers in his memoir. “I would give her points for this, him points for that, as a way of coping with it.”

All in the Family, season 1, episode 1, provides an almost greatest hits package of these terse and tense exchanges, which also taught Lear not to back away from the fray. He served as a radio operator and gunner in the U.S. Air Force during World War II, earning an Air Medal with four Oak Leaf Clusters after flying 52 combat missions, and being among the crew members featured in the books Crew Umbriag and 772nd Bomb Squadron: The Men, The Memories. Lear partnered with Ed Simmons to write sketches for Jerry Lewis and Dean Martin’s first five appearances on the Colgate Comedy Hour in 1950. They remained as the head writers for three years. They also wrote for The Ford Star Revue, The George Gobel Show, and the comedy team Rowan and Martin, who would later headline Laugh-In.

Lear went solo to write opening monologues for The Tennessee Ernie Ford Show, and produce NBC’s sitcom The Martha Raye Show, before creating his first series in 1959, the western The Deputy, which starred Henry Fonda. To get Frank Sinatra to read Lear’s screenplay for the 1963 film Come Blow Your Horn, Lear went on a protracted aerial assault. Over the course of weeks, he had the script delivered while planes with banners flew over Sinatra’s home, or accompanied by a toy brass band or a gaggle of hens. Lear even assembled a “reading den” in Ol’ Blue Eyes’ driveway, complete with smoking jacket, an ashtray and a pipe, an easy chair, ottoman, lamp, and the Jackie Gleason Music to Read By album playing on a portable phonograph. After weeks of missed opportunities, Lear remembers Sinatra finally read the script and “bawled the shit out of me for not getting it to him sooner.”

The creative perseverance Lear showed just to get the right person for the right part is indicative of the lengths Lear would go for creative excellence. He would continue to fight for artistic integrity, transforming prime time comedy with shows like Good Times, One Day at a Time, and the first late-night soap opera Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman. He brought legendary blue comedian Redd Foxx into homes with Sanford and Son, also based on a British sitcom, Steptoe and Son, which starred Harry H. Corbett and Wilfrid Brambell, best known for playing Paul McCartney’s grand-dad in A Hard Day’s Night. But before he could do these, and the successful and progressive All in the Family spinoffs The Jeffersons and Maude, he had to face battles, big and small, over the reluctantly changing face of television.

“Patience is a Virgin”

After Lear beat CBS to the rights to adapt Till Death Us Do Part he offered the show to ABC. When it was being developed for the television studio, the family in the original pilot were named the Justices, and the series was titled “Justice for All,” according to a 1991 “All in the Family 20th Anniversary Special.” They considered future Happy Days dad Tom Bosley, and acclaimed character actor Jack Warden for the lead part, before offering the role to Mickey Rooney. According to Even This I Get to Experience, Lear’s pitch to the veteran actor got to the words “You play a bigot” before Rooney stopped him. “Norm, they’re going to kill you, shoot you dead in the streets,” the Hollywood icon warned, asking if Lear might have a series about a blind detective with a big dog somewhere in the works.

Taped in New York on Sept. 3, 1968, the first pilot starred O’Connor and Jean Stapleton as Archie and Edith Justice. Stapleton, a stage-trained character actor who first worked as a stock player in 1941, was a consistent supporting player for playwright Horton Foote. Stapleton originated the role of Mrs. Strakosh in the 1964 Broadway production of Funny Girl, which starred Barbra Streisand. Lear considered her after seeing her performance in Damn Yankees. She’d made guest appearances on TV series like Dr. Kildare and The Defenders.

O’Connor was born in Manhattan but grew up in Queens, the same borough as the Bunker household with the external living room window which wasn’t visible from the interior. O’Connor acted steadily in theaters in Dublin, Ireland, and New York until director Burgess Meredith, assisted by The Addams Family’s John Astin, cast him in the Broadway adaptation of James Joyce’s novel Ulysses. O’Connor had roles in major motion pictures, including Lonely Are the Brave (1962), Cleopatra (1963), Point Blank (1967), The Devil’s Brigade (1968), Death of a Gunfighter (1969), Marlowe (1969), and Kelly’s Heroes (1970).  O’Connor appeared on television series like Gunsmoke, Bonanza, The Fugitive, The Wild Wild West, The Outer Limits, The Man from U.N.C.L.E., I Spy, That Girl, and Voyage to the Bottom of the Sea. He’d guest starred as a villain in a season 1 episode of Mission Impossible, and was up for the parts the Skipper on Gilligan’s Island and Dr. Smith on Lost in Space.

The first pilot also starred Kelly Jean Peters as Gloria and Tim McIntire as her husband Richard. ABC liked it enough to fund a second pilot, “Those Were the Days,” which shot in Los Angeles on Feb. 10, 1969. Richard was played by Chip Oliver, and Gloria Justice was played by Candice Azzara, who would go on to play Rodney Dangerfield’s wife in Easy Money, and make numerous, memorable guest appearances on Barney Miller. D’Urville Martin played Lionel Jefferson in both pilots. ABC cancelled it after one episode, worried about a show with a foul-mouthed, bigoted character as the lead.

CBS, which was trying to veer away from rural shows like Mayberry R.F.D., The Beverly Hillbillies, Petticoat Junction and Green Acres, bought the rights to the urban comedy and renamed it All in the Family. When Gleason’s contract to CBS ran out, Lear was allowed to keep O’Connor on as the main character.

Sally Struthers was one of the young actors featured in Five Easy Pieces, the 1970 counterculture classic starring Jack Nicholson. She’d also recently finished shooting a memorable part in the 1972 Steve McQueen hit The Getaway. Struthers had just been fired from The Tim Conway Comedy Hour because executives thought she made the show look cheap, which was her job. The premise of the show was it was so low-budget it could only afford one musician, who had to hum the theme song because they couldn’t afford an instrument, and one dancer, as opposed to a line of dancers like they had on The Jackie Gleason Show. Lear noticed her as a dancer on The Smothers Brothers Comedy Hour, a counterculture variety show which Rob Reiner wrote for with Steve Martin as a writing partner. Reiner’s then-fiancée, the director Penny Marshall, was also up for the role of Gloria, but in an interview for The Television Academy, Reiner recalls that, while Marshall could pass as Stapleton’s daughter, Struthers was obviously the one who looked like Archie’s “little girl.”

Reiner, the son of comedy legend Carl Reiner, was discovered in a guest acting role on the Andy Griffith vehicle series Headmaster, a show he wrote for, but had also played bit roles in Batman, The Andy Griffith Show, Room 222, Gomer Pyle, U.S.M.C., The Beverly Hillbillies and The Odd Couple. Reportedly, Richard Dreyfuss campaigned for the role of Michael, and Harrison Ford turned it down. Mike Evans was cast as Lionel Jefferson, the Bunkers’ young Black next-door neighbor who sugar-coated nonviolent protests with subtle and subversive twists on “giving people what they want.”

“We’re just sweeping dirty dishes under the rug.”

The very first episode tackled multiple issues right away. It discussed atheism, with Michael and Gloria explaining they have found no evidence of god. The family dissects affirmative action, with Archie asserting everyone has an equal chance to advance if they “hustle for it like I done.” He says he didn’t have millions of people marching for him to get his job, like Black Americans. “His uncle got it for him,” Edith explains, with an off-the-cuff delivery exemplifying why Stapleton is one of the all-time great comic character actors. The family argues socialism, anti-Semitism, sausage links and sausage patties. The generation gap widens as Archie wonders why men’s hair is now down to there, while Gloria’s skirt got so high “all the mystery disappears” when she sits down.

All in the Family would continue to deal with taboo topics like the gay rights movement, divorce, breast cancer, and rape. Future episodes would question why presidential campaign funds are unequal, how tax breaks for corporations kill the middle class, and weigh the personal price of serving in an unpopular war as opposed to dodging the draft. When Archie goes to a female doctor for emergency surgery a few seasons in, All in the Family points out she is most certainly paid less than a male doctor. When skyjackings were a persistent domestic threat in the 1970s, Archie suggested airlines should “arm the passengers.” It is very prescient of the NRA’s suggestion of arming teachers to combat school shootings.

But the first showdown between Lear and the network was fought for the sexual revolution. The first episode’s action begins when Edith and Archie come home early from church and interrupt Michael and Gloria as they’re about to take advantage of having the house to themselves. Gloria’s got her legs wrapped around Michael as he is walking them toward the stairs, and the bed. “At 11:10 on a Sunday,” Archie wants to know as he makes himself known. According to Lear’s memoir, CBS President William Paley objected, saying the line suggested sex. “And the network wants that out even though they’re married–I mean, it was plain silly,” he writes. “My script could have lived without the line, but somehow I understood that if I give on that moment, I’m going to give on silly things forever. So, I had to have that showdown.”

The standoff continued until 25 minutes before air time. CBS broadcast the episode, but put a disclaimer before the opening credits rolled, which Reiner later described as saying “Nothing you’re about to see has anything that we want to have anything to do with. As far as we’re concerned, if you don’t watch the next half hour, it’s okay with us.” Lear knew, with what he was doing, this was going to be the first of many battles, because this was the first show of its kind. Television families didn’t even flush toilets, much less bring unmentionables to the table. “The biggest problem a family might face would have been that the roast was ruined when the boss was coming over to dinner,” Lear writes. “There were no women or their problems in American life on television. There were no health issues. There were no abortions. There were no economic problems. The worst thing that could happen was the roast would be ruined. I realized that was a giant statement — that we weren’t making any statements.”

“What I say ain’t got nothing to do with what I think.”

Politicians and pundits worried about how the series might affect racial relations. The country had experienced inner city riots, battle lines were drawn over school desegregation, busing children to schools was met with violent resistance. Did All In the Family undermine bigotry or reinforce racism? Were people laughing at Archie or with him? Was it okay to like Archie more than Mike?

Lear believed humor would be cathartic, eroding bigotry. Bigots found a relief valve. Lear always insisted Archie was a satirically exaggerated parody to make racism and sexism look foolish. Liberals protested the character came across as a “loveable bigot,” because satire only works if the audience is in on the joke. Bigoted viewers didn’t see the show as satire. They identified with Archie and saw nothing wrong with ethnic slurs. Mike and Gloria come off like preachy, bleeding-heart liberal, hippie leeches. Lionel handled Archie better than Michael did.

O’Connor humanized Archie as an old-fashioned guy trying to make sense of a rapidly changing world. Bunker gave bigotry a human face and, because he hated everyone, he was written off as an “equal-opportunity bigot.” Not quite a defensible title. Archie was the most liked character on the show, and the most disliked. Most people saw him as a likable loser, so identifiable he was able to change attitudes. In a 1972 interview, O’Connor explained white fans would “tell me, ‘Archie was my father; Archie was my uncle.’ It is always was, was, was. It’s not now. I have an impression that most white people are, in some halting way, trying to reach out, or they’re thinking about it.” It sometimes worked against O’Connor the activist, however. When he backed New York Mayor John Lindsay’s 1972 anti-war nomination for the Democratic presidential nomination, Archie Bunker’s shadow distanced progressives.

Archie was relatable beyond his bigotry. He spoke to the anxieties of working- and middle-class families. Archie was a dock worker in the Corona section of Queens, who had to drive a cab as a second job, with little hope of upward mobility. He didn’t get political correctness. The character’s ideological quips were transformed into the bestselling paperback mock manifesto The Wit and Wisdom of Archie Bunker. White conservative viewers bought “Archie for President” buttons. 

“If you call me Cute one more time, I swear I’ll open a vein.”

As cannot be overstated, All in the Family set many precedents, both socially and artistically. The Bunker family is an icon on many levels, Archie and Edith’s chairs are at the Smithsonian. But Archie Bunker is also the Mother Courage of TV. The antithesis of the bland sitcom characters of the time, he also wasn’t the character we hated to love, or loved to hate. Archie was the first character we weren’t supposed to like, but couldn’t help it. This phenomenon continues. The next TV character to take on the iconic mantle was probably Louis De Palma on Taxi. Audiences should have wanted to take a lug wrench to his head, but Danny De Vito brought such a diverse range of rage and vulnerability to that part it was named TV Guide’s most beloved character for years.

We shouldn’t like Walter White, especially when he doffs that pretentious Heisenberg hat, on Breaking Bad. And let’s face it, Slipping Jimmy on Better Call Saul isn’t really the kind of guy you want to leave alone in your living room while you grab a drink. Families across the United States and abroad sat down to an Italian-style family dinner with Tony Soprano and The Sopranos every Sunday night. But on Monday mornings, most of us would have ducked him, especially if we owed him money. Even the advanced model of the Terminator guy was scared of Tony.

The best example of this is South Park’s Eric Cartman. While we don’t know who his father is on the series, he’s got Bunker DNA all over him. He’s even gotten into squabbles with Sally Struthers and Rob Reiner. This wasn’t lost on Lear, who contacted creators Trey Parker and Matt Stone to say he loved the show in 2003. Lear wound up writing for South Park’s seventh season. “They invited me to a party and we’re partying,” Lear told USA Today at the time. “There’s no way to overstate the kick of being welcomed by this group.”

“I hate entertainment. Entertainment is a thing of the past, now we got television.”

Television can educate as much as it wants to entertain, and All in the Family taught the viewing audience a whole new vocabulary. The casual epithets thrown on the show were unheard of in broadcast programming, no matter how commonplace they might have been in the homes of the people watching. When Sammy Davis Jr. comes to Bunker house in the first season, every ethnic and racial slur ever thrown is exchanged. In another first season episode, and both the unaired pilots, Archie breaks down the curse word “Goddamn.” But a large segment of the more socially conservative, and religious, audience thought All in the Family said whatever they wanted just because they could get away with it.

All in the Family debuted to low viewership, but rose to be ranked number one in the Nielsen ratings for five years. The show undermined the perception of the homogeneous middle-class demographic allowing shows like M*A*S*H to comment on contemporary events.

All in the Family represented the changing American neighborhood. The show opened the door for the working poor to join situation comedies as much as when the Bunkers welcomed Lionel, Louise (Isabel Sanford), and George Jefferson (Sherman Hemsley) when they moved into Archie’s neighborhood. Lear reportedly was challenged by the Black Panther Party to expand the range of black characters on his shows. He took the challenge seriously and added subversive humor. Sanford and Son was set in a junkyard in Watts. Foxx’s Fred Sanford rebelled against the middle-class aspirations of his son, Lamont (Demond Wilson). Good Times was set in the projects of Chicago, and took on issues like street gangs, evictions and poor public schools.

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Married With Children, The Simpsons, and King of the Hill continued to explore the comic possibilities of working class drama. Mary Richards on The Mary Tyler Moore Show was a successful, upwardly mobile television producer. Working-class women were represented on sitcoms like Alice, but didn’t have a central voice until 1988 when Roseanne debuted on ABC, and Roseanne Barr ushered in her brand of proletarian feminism. All in the Family’s legacy includes Black-ish, as creator Kenya Barris continues to mine serious and controversial subject matter for cathartic and educational laughter. Tim Allen covets the conservative crown, and is currently the Last Man Standing in for Archie. But as reality gets more exaggerated than any satire can capture, All in the Family remains and retains its most authentic achievement.

The post How All in the Family Changed the TV Landscape appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[emmafestudy]

I've been so busy these last few weeks that I've not had time to post anything! We had OFSTED in at work last week, which was stressful and hectic, and I've fallen out with my manager over a horrible email she sent me. This week I've got an interview, dentist, uni work to complete and submit, teaching and a Hen weekend in Liverpool to get through. It's only Wednesday but I'm already exhausted beyond belief. Can't wait for Sunday evening when I can relax a little.