#help me im opening youtube at this very moment

[tongu3s-xnd-t33th]

no dsmp dont drag me back in. . . not dont do thaaaaaaat. . . noooooo. . .

[cheriladycl01]

Kinktober 23/10/2024 Alexander Albon - Bondage

Plot: Alex never showed his kinky side to you, but after finding some handcuffs you can’t help but question it.

Warnings: Kinktober, SMUT, bondage, tied up, fingering, blowjob, p in v etc 18+ Minors DNI

You and Alex had been dating for ages. You were 19 and he was 23 when you started dating. Now 5 years later and you were stronger than ever. You were freelance travel journalist and YouTuber and so travelling around the F1 calendar with your boyfriend and seeing all these cool new places was perfect for you relationship. There wasn’t a moment you and Alex were apart.

One aspect of your life you really enjoyed with Alex apart from all the travel was your sex life. It was very active and he was also so tentative and knew exactly what you wanted and when you wanted it. However sometimes you felt like he was holding something back.

You never questioned it until today when you found a pair of fluffy handcuffs in a shoe box under the bed. You’d never seen your sweet and goofy boyfriend have anything remotely naughty apart from the basics like condoms and those aren’t naughty that’s just being safe, but to see this was … interesting and you couldn’t help but wonder why he never told you.

“Hey babe” you grin as he comes in planting a kiss on the side of his cheek which he swivels so your lips end up on his making you grin more into the kiss.

“How was your day my gorgeous goblin?” He teases, it was a running joke that whenever you had a home day you became some sort of goblin, golem dupe where you’d just sort of rot.

“Mmmmm she’s very good, very chilled day. How is my handsome F1 driving, handcuff using, Williams racer boyfriend” you say as nonchalantly as possible, trying to stop yourself from laughing.

“Yeah he’s- wait, what did you say?” He freezes his brain catching up with the whole question.

“I asked how your day was?” You say cocking your head to the side, you deserved a Grammy for the confused look you were so naturally pulling right now with the laugher at bay.

“No no no you said handcuff using? How- how’d you know about that?” He asks his eyes wide.

“I may have found a pair under the bed. Why didn’t you tell me!!” You whine pushing his shoulder lightly in a jokingly annoyed way.

“Because we were fine the way we were … and it’s not like you’ve ever prompted about trying anything new!” He says throwing his hands up.

“I’m just a girl! Okay! Im shy” you say back and he looks at your with wide eyes, not in shock but in exasperation of how on Earth you turned this into a funny situation.

“Okay fine, test time now. Go on upstairs if you think your so funny missy” he tell you his finger pointing up to the bedroom. You head cocks to the side as if to test him to see if he really meant it.

“I’m not fucking about, upstairs … now” he says his voice gruffer than you ever heard it. You run up the stairs with a squeal him following closely behind you but not fast enough that he looked desperate.

Even thought it’s you … so he really was. All he could think about was sinking into you warm pussy.

You gently get on the bed, patting the shoe box that had his handcuffs in it. And he just chuckles.

“Surprised you didn’t dig deeper baby” he laughs going to the wardrobe and pulling a bigger box down from there that was well out of you reach and once he opened it you could tell why.

It look like 50 shades had threw up inside the box. There was so rope, gags, blindfolds more colourful handcuffs and other bondage devices you don’t think you’ve ever seen before.

It was a shock. You though the cheeky pair of handcuffs may have even been a sexy Halloween costume he’d done one year but no… this was the real Alex Albon.

And he was kinky as fuck.

This must have come around is his RedBull days surely…

He takes out and item which happened to be a blindfold and looks at you for permission to put it on. You nod, trusting Alex completely and he slips it on. He gently pushes you back so your head gently falls into the plush duck feather pillow on the bed that are now underneath your head.

Alex hands run up your legs. Pulling your skirt up a little while taking your underwear straight off. His fingers circle you clit before diving in thrusting in and out at a slow base. You could feel his knuckles graze against your walls sending jolts of pleasure down your spine.

Your hips thrust up to meet his fingers and get them as deep as possible. Your mouth open from the breathy gasps your leaving in your wake.

His fingers soon speed up and his other hand comes down to add extra stimulation by circling your clit with his thumb.

“Argh Alex. You moan, your hands reaching forward for him, but in an instant something clamps them down so they’re together in front of you.

He’d put the handcuffs on. You thought he may try handcuff you to the bed but handcuffing your wrists together while still in reach of his own was just bizarre.

As he speeds up his thumb on your clit adding a pressure that has a loud guttural moan come from you, you’re releasing all over his hands.

“Get up and Turn around baby, your gonna suck my cock with your hands tied okay?” He feels you and you nod. He sits down on the bed, helping you turn round and lean into him while kneeling on the floor. He doesn’t pull the blindfold off, he just lets you feel around with your mouth until you lick what you know is the tip of his cock as you can taste the pre-cum that’s leaking out.

He helps you out, holding your shoulder while your head moves in a sucking motion your cheeks hollow. He cant see your eyes but he knows with how deep your taking him that there will be tears building up in them.

He is quicker to release having been worked up since the minute the thought of you in his handcuffs became a possible scenario.

It was in his head, all while thinking off you wrapped in all his sexy and kinky toys.

His load is quick to shoot down the back of your throat, you struggling to swallow what he gave you due to the amount that has come out of him.

“Argh babe” he moans out as he thrusts his last dribbles into your mouth before pulling out. He removes the blindfold smiling at your bloodshot eyes and puffy red lips.

He helps you up onto the bed. Placing you back to the position you’d originally been in before he’s pulling out the soft sex rope and tying it around your wrists before it’s hauled onto the bedframe tightly holding you in place your arms stuck up in the air.

The cold air hits your exposed pussy making you shut you legs on instinct but Alex thigh comes down ti nudge them back open while he tightens the ropes around your arms.

It was so hot and sexy and you couldn’t believe there was this side to your boyfriend but there was and you were more than happy to experiment more with his after this now that you guys had got it all out on the open.

“I’d normally put the blindfold back on but I wanna see your face when you’re so fucked out you can’t even say my name” he says with a small smirk, one you’d never seen on your Alex before. This hunky guy above you wasn’t Alex Albon, this was Alexander Albon sex god and you were down bad.

“Alex” you gasp at the crudeness even though you were loving this side of him.

He pushed in hard and fast giving you no time to adjust before he’s slamming in and out with you. Your arms are already aching from being held up in the position that they are, but it’s a kind of ache that you enjoy. Makes you feel good and worn out.

His hands are all over your body that you can’t even think all you can do it feel, feel how amazing your boyfriend is making you feel right now.

You guys hold this incredibly intimate eye contact that makes you squirm and grip the rope that is slowly rubbing against your skin.

Marks for sure will be left on your wrist when they are taken off.

“A-Al-lex-x fuck I- I-” you moan looking up at him. He was insane and you needed to tell hime that but you didn’t have the words to tell him how much you loved him.

“I know baby, see told you you’d be fucked out” he grins kissing along your jaw as you continue to moan at the feeling of his quick thrusts making his fuck graze against your walls in a rapid fashion.

Fucked out, that you were.

And you loved it.

Taglist:

@littlebitchsposts @hockey-racing-fubol @laura-naruto-fan1998 @22yuki @simxican @sinofwriting @lewisroscoelove @cmleitora @daemyratwst @lauralarsen @the-untamed-soul @thewulf @itsjustkhaos @purplephantomwolf @chasing-liberosis @summissss @gulphulp @starfusionsworld @jspitwall @sierruhhhh @georgeparisole @youcannotcancelquidditch @tallbrownhairsarcastic @ourteenagetragedy @peachiicherries @formulas-bitch @cherry-piee @spilled-coffee-cup @mehrmonga @eiraethh @curseofhecate @alliwantisadonut @dark-night-sky-99 @i-wish-this-was-me @tallrock35 @butterfly-lover @barnestatic @landossainz @darleneslane @barcelonaloverf1life @r0nnsblog @ilove-tswizzle @laneyspaulding19 @malynn @landosgirlxoxo @marie0v @yourbane @teamnovalak @nikfigueiredo @fionaschicken @0picels0 @tinydeskwriter @ironmaiden1313 @splaterparty0-0 @formula1mount

[napakmahal]

Don’t slut up that college

Btw if you’ve watched the show and if you look (not that close) you will find a lot of Euphoria references.

“I want to look like attractive but not desperate. Like im begging to make a move.” Tadashi help a hanger with a loose light green short sleeve button up. In a few minutes he’d be leaving to spend the night with this girl he’d been talking to for a while who lived in the dorms of another campus. SFIT didn’t allow foreign students on their campus unless they were being considered for a spot there so it was easier for him to go over to y/n’s place.

In order to get complete, unbiased, and a mixture of different opinions he’d invited his entire clique over to his hour to help him pack. Along with his little brother listening by accident of course.

Gogo coughed into the crease of her elbow, “I don’t think she’s going to look at any of your clothes and think: Oh my god he’s trying to fuck me.”

“LANGUAGE!” Tadashi scolded, referring to the much younger college students behind the paper room divider.

She popped her hand over her mouth, “Oops, sorry.”

Hiro removed one of his headphones from where he’d been watching some dumb youtube video on his bed and called out, “It’s all good Gogo!”

Honey pointed out, “I like it. I think you look very presentable and casual. Like it’s enough to go out, but not too over the top.”

“Yeah,” Wasabi, who was sitting on the floor right next to his friend’s bed agreed. “Besides, I think muted colors and calm patterns make you look clean.”

Tadashi was holding onto the hanger and placing it in front of his torso as if he was actually wearing it before turning around.

“Fred.”

The blonde looked up, squinted for a few moments before responding. “It’s nice. Suits you really well.”

With a sigh, Tadashi took the shirt off the hanger and rolled it up into a log before gently placing it inside his backpack. He needed help planning out this weekend. Over the course of the months Y/n and Tadashi had been talking he thought he’d made it abundantly clear that he really liked her. And he had, but he also wanted her to know that he took her seriously. So showing up to the two-day mini vacation they planned dressed like a bum was not an option. He liked this girl and was very committed and devoted to her and he was going to act like it.

Just then, the door to the boys shared bedroom swung open with a creaking noise. Their Aunt Cass was standing in the doorway holding their newly groomed cat like a baby in her arms.

“Hey Auntie.” Hiro greeted her without looking up. The rest followed in saying hello.

Aunt Cass walked into the room before looking around at all the clothes spread out on her oldest nephews bed.

“I want you to know I’m putting a lot of trust into you. Letting you go out.” Aunt Cass pointed her finger at Tadashi before dropping Mochi the cat and letting him run to sit on Honey’s lap for ear scratches.

From the other side of the divider Hiro laughed and said, “Yeah Tadashi, don’t get her pregnant!”

Aunt Cass grabbed one of Tadashi’s shirt and threw it at Hiro’s face. “That’s not funny, Hiro.”

The boy’s smirk wiped off but quickly returned when his aunt looked back at his older brother with a serious tone. “No seriously, do not get her pregnant.”

“Relax Auntie,” Tadashi zipped up his backpack. “She has a roommate.”

“Mmmhmm, listen to me. I want you to keep your phone on you, make sure your ringer is on all the time. If you go out and when you come back I want you to take a photo of you in the room with a working clock in it.” She pointed her finger in his face.

Despite him being an adult, she still worried. After the deaths of their parents, she’d been intrusted with the care of her beautiful boys. And if she’d lost them, lost on of their parents babies, how was she supposed to forgive herself for that?

Everyone’s jaw had dropped at her demanding request.

“What the hell?” Gogo was laughing into her palm.

Wasabi looked up at Aunt Cass, “You mean like a ransome photo?”

Completely falbberagsted, Tadashi laughed out breathlessly with his mouth hung open, “I hate you, did you know that?”

“Aww well I love you.” She wrapped her arm around her (much taller) nephew.

Tadashi wrapped both of his arms around her torso like a little kid and tucked his head into her, “I love you, too.”

Tadashi was getting ready to leave in a matter of a few more minutes. He’d been lent the family’s truck for the weekend for him to use. Not very hot to have to ride around on a moped with your date.

“Okay, have fun rockstar.” Aunt Cass and the rest of the clique including Hiro followed him out as he was getting ready to pull the truck out of the alley behind their garage. Once he was in and the engine was turned on, his entire friend group started making vaguely sexual gestures toward him behind his Aunt’s back. Which then prompted Hiro to shout at the top of his lungs:

“DON’T SLUT UP THAT CAMPUS!”

Aunt Cass slapped him in the back of the head.

The rest of the farewells consisted of ‘be a gentleman’ or ‘tell her we said hi’. It wasn’t until everyone but Aunt Cass had gone back inside the café that she carefully whispered to herself as she watched the truck drive further away:

“Don’t you dare get her pregnant.”

*******************

“Okay, how do I look?” You turned around with your arms spread wide for your roommate to judge.

This would be the first time Tadashi would be sleeping over and for two day you’d never have to say goodnight. Obviously, this was not your first date with him. You guys’s first date was a trip to the botanical gardens where he insisted on taking a million pictures of you and posting them on every social media platform he had (Instagram, that’s it) with the caption ‘someone’s someone”. And ever since you two have been non-stop talking. He’s the first person to wish you a good morning and he’s the last person to tell you goodnight. He just feels right, he might be it.

Your roommate, getting high off her cherry coke-flavored vape kissed her teeth. “Like a bad bitch.”

“Oh my god,” You laughed dropping your face in your hands. “ Thank you for that, but can you come up with another one?”

“Why? You look like a bad bitch. End of story.”

You scoffed, “Yes, and thank you but I feel like he’s not that kind of guy.”

“What the fuck does that mean?”

“I just mean like he’s not one to call girls bad, or fine. Hell, he has the hardest time saying the word sexy. To him, it’s a cuss word. So, other than a bad bitch is there anything else I can pass off as?”

Your roommate breathed out a cloud of scented smoke, “An angel.”

“Aww thank you.”

“What are you guys even doing tonight?” She asked from her side of the room.

You grabbed your beauty blender and started to fix some things, “Umm we’re just gonna hang out. Grab food, walk around, and then come back here to watch a movie.”

“Watch a movie, or watch a movie?

You rolled your eyes. “You’re actually done.”

“How long till Netflix asks if you’re still watching?” She raised her eyebrows suggestively.

You argued with your roommate, “He’s not the kind of guy.”

“Oh really? What campus does he go to? OMG PLEASE TELL ME HE’S NOT IN A FRAT!”

You gagged at the thought of dating a frat boy. “Ew no, that’s such an ick!”

“So where does he go? Here?”

You shook your head and started going through your collection of jewelry to decipher what would look best with your outfit. “No, he goes to SFIT. He’s a- a robotics major.”

“Ooooh she got herself a nerd!” She laughed in your ear. “How’d you guys meet anyways?”

You thought about that day and a sly smile plastered on your face. A few months ago, one of the girls in your dorm was transferring to SFIT because she couldn’t afford to attend there all four years and a lot of you wanted to show out to the student showcase to support her getting in. There is where you meet a tall boy in a baseball cap with eyes are brown as freshly brewed coffee and honey-baked skin. Needless to say, he was very cute, and the girl with the e/c eyes from the party college across town wasn’t too bad looking at all. And his inflatable healthcare robot was quite the snitch when his heart rate started speeding up around you. What started off as exchanging numbers with and texting a boy from a college across town, turned into wanting to see him all the time, going out on dates, doing homework together, staying up all hours of the night to talk to each other, and sent photos and videos once. And you two wouldn’t have had it any other way.

“Oh shit,” Your phone dinged. “He’s here. Which me luck!”

You grabbed your keys, kicked your shoes on, and started out the door when your roommate shouted back at you, “Good luck, boo-boo!”

In order for him to really be allowed on campus he needed a student to accompany him so it was vital you were on time so they wouldn’t ban him for trying to trespass. Also because you were just like, really excited to see him.

Across the parking lot, in the blue-purple lit sky decorated with the twinking and flashing electric lights of the crazy industrialized city, Tadashi could be found pacing back in forth behind the long tail of the light blue rusty work truck. The second he came into sight, swinging his keys in his hand while he waited for you, you straightened your arms and sped walked towards him.

“Hey, luv!” You smiled at him.

He thought your smile was the most beautiful in the world. All the things you posted wearing more dark makeup with eyeliner wings sharp enough to cut someone were no doubt attractive, but there was something about the photos you were always smiling. Like the time you two went to the aquarium and a little otter named Silvia grew very fond of you. Swimming around and following you around the tank. You smiled so much that date that all the photos he took of you took up almost five percent of his photo memory.

Tadashi quickly turned around to look you in the eye. “Hi-wow you’re so beautiful.”

“Aww thank you.” He embraced you in a hug and took a moment to just take you in. The way your perfume smelled, what your hair smelled like, the different textures of your clothes. Everything mattered. Nothing but you.

The entire time you were driving around, talking and enjoying your time together Tadashi felt like he couldn’t be happier. However, at the same time he could have sworn that he was going to be sick to his stomach. Everytime you touched his hand like you’d done a thousand times before it still made his stomach flip in ways that were questionable to human physiology. Since it was a Saturday, everyone had their boyfriends and girlfriends over and all restaurants on campus were fully booked. It’s not like you and Tadashi were huge fans of sit downs despite your first date being at a sit down.

Instead, the two of you went down to the strip near the pier where the countless food vendors were backed up almost a hundred people each. Where you could watch the sea lions bask in the sunset, kids flying kites, a couple sharing ice creams, and a friendgroup celebrating a birthday with a picnic.

“Wait a second, you surf?!” You screeched while holding onto a stick of takoyaki in one hand and a blue raspberry frozen lemonade in the other.

Laughing, Tadashi answered, “Yeah, I have a surfboard in my room. Haven’t you seen it?”

“No, what the hell? Why am I just now finding out about this?” You playfully elbowed him in the arm.

“Well I haven’t gone in super long. So right now my boards just collecting dust.”

You bolding walked closer to him and placed you head on his shoulder as you walked. “If you ever plan on going again, will you teach me?”

“Of course, so that one day we can go surfing together.”

You held out your pinky, “Do you promise?”

“I promise.” Tadashi interlaced his pinky with yours and kissed the back of his fist.

You two sat on a park bench to simply listen to the natural environment of the city and the sloshing of the sea on the pier’s structure.

“So,” Tadash turned his body towards you. “How are you?”

“Same as the other million times you’ve asked me.” You laughed. That was the first thing Tadashi asked when you guys talked. How you were doing, or if there ws anything you wanted to share. To him, understanding every bit of the mind he’d grown to find so much beauty and adventure in was always the objective. The purpose of the experiment that was the relationship he was chasing after.

“Sorry, sorry,” He raised his hands in defeat.

Though you assured him it was fine you still wondered something. “How come you like asking me questions about myself? Like I ask you things and you answer them, but then you shift back to me. Why do you do that?”

How was he supposed to tell her that he wanted her to understand that he truly wanted her to be with him without sounding like a creep? Just earlier he’d asked all his friends what clothing made him seem like less of a weirdo, and now she was asking a question he was scared she may not want the answer to. At any moment during his answer she could get up adn walk away. What if she just wanted to take it slow, or maybe she didn’t want to date date him at all. She could just be exploring and the idea that he might weight her down could make her leave.

“Uhh,” He laughed nervously. “I just want you to make sure you know I care and take you seriously. I think I’m like pretty good about communicating with people but sometimes, I don’t know.”

You knew what he was talking about. When Hiro was a botfighter, he was constantly in dangerous situations. It was such a difficult time that really did push their limits to the test. The entire household had huge blowout arguments and breakdowns at least twice a month and it was ruining everyone. Hiro had made Aunt Cass cry without trying and the fourteen-year-old’s mental health was in such a decline they were starting to question whether or not he had some clinical disorders. During all of this, Tadashi kind of just watched. Granted he tried to be the mediator, and was always there for Hiro physically but when it came to him trying to express he just couldn’t. It’s not like he didn’t have anything to say, but it was like the words had been taken from him. What he really wanted to say just wouldn’t come out. Maybe if it had Hiro would have stopped a long time ago and there wouldn’t be a scar on their family dynamic.

For everytime he’d had one of these breakdowns he didn’t want to talk to someone that wasn’t you. You just got him, he felt it. He doesn’t worry about telling you and then you bringing it up all the time, or trying to give him counseling, if you’re going to judge him for being so weak he let his own family fall apart even if it was just for a period of time. All the things wrong with his mind and his thinking, you soothed.

You placed your hand on his, with nothing more to say. That’s how right this was. No words needed. You got him and he got you.

“You want to know how I am?”

He nodded and with a whisper answered, “I really do.”

In a whisper you answered close to his face. “I’m really fuckin’ happy right now.”

On his parents memory, Tadashi has never been so forward before. But something about the moment made it feel right. He leaned in and grabbed the back of your head. Like he was going to drop dead of a heart attack right that second if he didn’t kiss you. This wasn’t your guys’ first kiss, but it was the most intimate and dramatic.

With your foreheads pressed to each other he whispered, “Y/n.”

“Yeah?”

“D-Do you like, umm,” God he was such a fucking idiot. How old was he? Eleven? “Do you want to be my girlfriend?”

You ran your hand through his fine black hair and leaned back with a look of content on your face. “I already am.”

Now, nor you or Tadashi ever really told anyone what really happened on that first night in your empty dorm. Despite the thousands of questions you’d kept it to yourself. All they needed to know was that you were his and he was yours.

[spennsrs]

Hi! I noticed that your requests are open and that you are a Spencer simp (same!!) so I was wondering if I could request something with him? Anything really, I just think that the world needs more Spencer Agnew fics :))

TYPE OF WRITING: one sided pining drabble CONTENT CREATOR(S): spencer agnew of smosh SONG REC: my type by saint motel MARNIE'S NOTE: THE WORLD NEEDS MORE SPENCER !! i hope this satiates not only your need for more spence, but also my need lawl ... also spence is 100% besties to lovers type guy... also mayhaps part 2 in the future???

from: spenner 🐌 ' [y/n] ' ' [y/n] answer plz ' ' are u dead ' ' is this because i won at mario kart ' ' heeeeeeeeey ' ' im off work and im booooooored '

[y/n] lifts the pillow from their face, the constant buzzing of their phone making them frown. they pick the phone up, scrolling through the notifications. youtube... threads... x (you stick your tongue out... elon you bitch, twitter was fine)... a goofy smile tugs at their lips at the onslaught of texts from their best friend, spencer agnew, and as more came in.

from: spenner 🐌 ' my best friend, [y/n] [l/n] is dead!!1 ' ' haha get it ' ' family guy reference ' ' see [y/n] this is how much i need u in my life ' ' im making fucking family guy references '

they simply watch the three dots, signaling spencer was typing as more and more texts were sent by the curly haired man, shaking their head. finally, they decide it was enough torture for their poor friend, typing out a few texts. they giggle as the three dots disappear for a moment, only to reappear.

to: spenner 🐌 ' chill out you funion fuck ' ' im here ' ' unlike some people, some of us have lives while our best friend is at work '

this was a lie. they had (very shamelessly) not answered spencer in favor of catching up on their favorite tv show.

from: spenner 🐌 ' about damn time ' ' i was dying without you ' ' soooooo whats the plan can i come over or ' ' also funion fuck?????? '

to: spenner 🐌 ' so you can eat my food? ' ' ig you can :/ '

there was no response, and [y/n] had reason to believe spencer had either pulled a fast one and was now ignoring them, or was on his way. they opted to believe the latter.

they hurriedly get up to clean up what little mess there was, knowing spence really didn't care.

ㅤ ೀ ㅤ۫ ㅤ۪ㅤ۫ ㅤ ♡ ㅤ

spencer arrived at [y/n]'s apartment, sticking the key into the door and unlocking it. he got an odd thought as he stepped into the apartment, his mind wandering into what if territory. it was dangerous, sure... but it was hard when he had developed this huge, heart wrenching, heavy crush on his best friend.

he shakes his head when a voice calls out. "spencer? that you?" he chuckles at [y/n]'s voice, they knew the answer. but he decided to tease them.

"spencer who? it's a robber, announcing my break in. here i come!" he can't help but cackle as his best friend's head comes into view, frowning deeply. "yeah, yeah, it's me. literally the only other person that has a key to your apartment, dumbass."

"not true! angela and amanda have a key!"

a pang stung in his heart, but he shrugged it off. they were [y/n]'s friends, spence, chill. he was not about to be jealous over coworkers.

he makes his way to where [y/n] was, in their room with a sigh. he flops onto their bed dramatically, much to [y/n]'s amusement. they pat his leg before sitting back at their laptop, scrolling through their email. a comfortable quiet falls over the two, the only real noise coming from the soft clicking of keys from the laptop.

spencer turns his head to gaze at his friend- or, the back of them... not that he cared. this had become a common thing, him coming over to just.. decompress from work. he loved his position at smosh, but [y/n] was really his rock. they had been a constant in his life, keeping him grounded. he owed a lot to them... but he guessed it wouldn't be long before the whole crush thing began. how could he not? they were such a genuine and loving person, they accepted spencer for all his weirdness and even parroted it back to him. with [y/n], he could be himself, his true authentic self. not a facade he had to put on in front of a camera, not the one he had with other friends, he was himself with [y/n].

he slowly smiles as they turn their head to check on spencer, a soft pink painting itself on their cheeks.

"stop staring, weirdo. not a good look." "can i not stare at my amazingly gorgeous best friend?"

next thing he knew, spencer was laughing as a pen was chucked in his direction, sitting up.

one day, he would spill it all to [y/n]. but for now... this dynamic was good enough for him.

[kitkat-2204]

Guys I highkey wanted to make a story about her friend at a sleepover and kink indulgence during it so im gonna help my brain and make it:

Olivia was very shy. She didn’t show her true nature to anyone and kept to her thoughts to herself. That was the biggest reason maya invited her to sleepover. Maya was outgoing, open, and yet decided to invite Olivia specifically to a one on one sleepover. Olivia was more than confused on the reasoning, but decided to say yes anyway. “I just want to get her contact for college assignment help and move on.” Olivia thought, nervously waiting at Maya’s front door. Maya opens the door with sheer excitement on her face, smiling ear to ear saying hello to Olivia. “Hi olivia! Please come inside, I made tacos for dinner!” Maya introduces enthusiastically. “So… what do you do for work? How is ur first semester going?” Maya asks, about to take a bite into a taco. “Im doing okay. Right now I do freelance work for a small animation company that works on YouTube animations, and I am taking some light classes that just focus on my major right now.” Olivia relents, looking down at her unfinished plate of tacos while speaking. “Sorry if im being too forward Olivia, I just really want to get to know you. Ive seen some of your work and I must say I am, rather impressed… I was quite embarrassed to admit so however.” Maya responds bashfully. “Wow… she… actually likes my work…? Im glad.” Olivia thinks, feeling a little bit better with meeting Maya, feeling glad that her art is being appreciated. After dinner, the two of them drink some light drinks of wine together while relaxing in Maya’s room, feeling a little more comfortable with each other now that the ice is broken. Later on in the night, with them both feeling slightly tipsy, Maya jokingly says “Oh dear..I think those tacos are getting to me… I hope you don’t mind..” and proceeds to let a small sigh, indicating she passed gas. “Sorry.. I have gastrointestinal issues sometimes, and it’s quite disabling. My doctor recommends that I am open about my need to pass gas. Is…that okay?” Maya asks bashfully. Olivia however, is quite red by the thought, having a secret thing for farts in private. She does everything she can to keep this private however, ever since middle school where she was caught, and relentlessly teased until she exchanged schools. “Thats okay, no worries.” Olivia responds, as nonchalant seeming as possible. The rest of the night became much more intense for Olivia, with Maya getting more and more gassy overall. Each fart becoming more and more obvious, with a more intense and distracting sound from Mayas voice being heard from each release. “Ahh… sorry my stomach really hurts… this is feeling better, again I apologize… I hope it’s not too gross..” Maya repeats. “It’s not gross, its normal, no worries.” Olivia responds, working even harder to hide her intense feelings of desire more than before. Her palms were sweating, her head filled with tantalizing thoughts that just melted her even more, and yet she would not allow anyone to see. She only slightly looked at Maya when she sees her lifting her left leg up just enough to allow another release to bubble out, but quickly averted her gaze, becoming self conscious. Maya felt her gas bubbling out of her until she felt something wet release, becoming increasingly embarrassed and bashful, only to burst out laughing. “Oh dear, I think I pushed a little too hard… I CANNOT keep doing this!!” Maya says, with laughter in between her bashful expression. “Oh dear, don’t worry, you don’t need to be embarrassed, I bet it felt better for your stomach ache right..?” Olivia said carefully, trying to hide her desire behind her words will all the effort in the world. It was at that moment however, that Maya began to notice how Olivia was acting, before she even realized she was caught. Maya noticed the flushed look on her face, her nervous clenched palms, her eyes darting back and forth with fear, and her biggest give away, what she said. Olivia said just a little too much, gave her desire away just slightly enough for Maya to notice, just with the prospect of Maya describing the relief she feels from releasing.

“She’s into this huh… oh dear. Thats so unbelievably cute. I can’t believe she working so hard to hide herself. I want to make her comfortable.” Maya thought. She then proceeds to lift her left leg again, noticing the slight shift in Olivias eyes as she does so. “I can’t let anyone know. I need to calm down..” Olivia thinks, trying to cool herself down. She then glimpses at Maya rubbing her stomach and announcing herself, “I… can’t hold it.. I am going to just do it..” At this point, Olivia can’t help it. Her eyes flutter with desire and sees Maya looking at her, immediately covering her face in embarrassment. “I am so sorry…. I know that I am weird.. please don’t hate me..” Olivia sputters in-between sobs. Maya pulls Olivias hands away from her face, bringing her face right next to Olivia’s ears. “There is nothing weird about you… express your needs how you please… I don’t mind.” Maya whispers reassuringly. Olivias entire body shakes with desire, never having the opportunity to indulge in her interests before today. Maya proceeds to push her stomach, looking at Olivia closely while releasing the pressure and pain all into her pants. “Oh yes… this helps so much…” Maya says in-between breaths of relief. “Oh yes…this is just… so lovely..” Olivia whispers while finally getting the courage to touch herself, feeling safe enough around Maya in a way she has never felt safe before. After this sleepover, Olivia and Maya became close in a way that she could have never imagined. Going on dates, talking about art, and remembering the day they trusted each-other, being at a simple college sleepover.

I wanted to make this story not just for sexual purposes, but also to talk about the way kink shaming and sexual shame in general affects people through the lense of storytelling. I hope you guys enjoy :)

[jordynbreeloa777]

Hello everything is fine? Could you clear this doubt for me? Well, I used a wave subliminal that I saw on YouTube, I had some symptoms, my heart was very racing, I felt several pulls as if I were in a portal and I had to enter but I was 'barred' and there were some moments when my body turned and I kind of I felt that it turned off as if the mind woke up and the sleeping body passed the audio time which was 10 minutes and I ended up opening my eye because my heart was racing so much could you explain to me what that was and I had some thoughts like 'I'm not going to go in in the void' when I was trying the method

okayy, hey anon! This is why i have a love hate relationship with the void state. I don’t know what that was, but I think it’s getting taken over the top. You can literally get in by just laying down and affirming, you don’t need subliminals, sleep paralysis.., lucid dreaming none of that. I think the community really out did there selves with this one. That seems scary, but if you really want to eneter the void don’t be scared of your own power. Your mind was awake, while your body was asleep, If you had doubts you weren't in the void state :)

This video talks more about the symptoms and the void state💝

Hope this helped, im trying to respond to all dms,inboxes,and ask :)

Happy Manifesting!💝💝

[tonoiho]

howdy heres a decent post about how to find new music to listen to, from an autistic person who literally needs music to function most times 💪

spotify based since that is what i use

first off, Discover Weekly (updates Mondays) and Release Radar (updates Fridays) are pretty good if you arent looking for music quickly. i prefer Discover Weekly bc it usually is from artists ive never listened to.

BUT if you are anything like me and kind of need music daily, and/or feel like everything is getting stale to listen to and just is not stimulating enough, theres quite a few things you can do (:

i primarily use Chosic, since it kinda has a bunch of different shit to use n look at

if it feels too overwhelming, what you can do is stick with "Music Genre Finder" and "Similar Songs Finder"

even though it might sometimes ask on some pages, you do NOT have to sign into Spotify for this site if you dont want to (:

using this banger as my control song

Music Genre Finder

figuring out what genres and sub-genres you listen to the most is about to become your best friend ok

pretty much just toss in a bunch of songs you enjoy and take note of the genres and sub-genres. i recommend making playlists of songs with similar or same genres (and also bc its fun)

this one is the most basic, but is a good starting point to help you go down your rabbit hole

Similar Songs Finder

same concept; throw in songs you want more of. i do one song at a time but you can do multiple

theres also this (v), so have fun with that B)

i recommend taking a look at the advanced settings, but for the sake of keeping this post as comprehensive as possible, im going to stick to the basics.

clicking generate will pull up a list of songs similar to your input, available as both Spotify and YouTube playlists to save if you so choose

to make this easier, you can also analyze the playlist songs directly from here; just middle click the buttons to open a new tab so you dont lose this page

Moving on from Chosic to other methods lol

PANTHER. Panther is sooo good imo

this one is artist-based, and sometimes the song previews it gives do not load, but you can simply look them up to listen for yourself in that case.

i will use I Met a Yeti as an example

very simple; i recommend going into this website with lowered volume because sometimes the audio is loud and crunchy; it will sound better on Spotify though

Create Similar Playlist

this is a feature that is already in Spotify, and it is again, very basic.

right clicking on a playlist ofc pulls up a neat lil menu

this one isnt that great, but it works better with the more songs you have on it from different artists.

often times it will add songs you already have saved, but otherwise its kinda okay

Enchance

again, a built-in Spotify feature, however this one might not be for everyone as i believe this is an experimental feature that not everybody has at the moment. still, if you do have it, i absolutely recommend it

basically what it does is add ~100 songs to your Liked Playlist, spaced out every two songs (they are not permanently saved if that annoys you; they go away after turning off this feature)

update 11/11/23

Enhance is out now i think? however it's only for created playlists and not your liked playlist. it still works the same but adds less music. more music gets suggested though when you save them

the Panther site had some issues loading for a while, but it's working again (it may have just been me. idk)

this is all i have for now lol. if you have any questions lemme know (:

hope this helps!

[trashyandtiredsol]

UPDATED: October 31st, 2024

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Personal Info And Tags (Only Some That I Actually Remembered To Add :P) Under The Cut

Multi-Fandom Blog (Don't be surprised when you follow me for one thing then I post about another thing).

My name's Sol or Solstice! (On here that is, not my actual name, tho I wish it was sometimes :/)

17 (Birthday's May 2nd, 2007 !!)

🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈 Demigirl and Queer! 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

Recently found the term demigirl and I quite like it for myself so- ye I'm adding it here :3

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-> |#dtiysol💚| My DTIY's!

(70+ Follower DTIY) so far it's only Blue from the foodie au ( participant's: 01 ) Deadline: December 1st, 2023 (only adding a deadline so I don't end up forgetting about this after 2 months)

(Finished)

(100+ Follower DTIY) for my Life Death and Love au

( participant's: 00 ) Deadline: None

(Permanently Ongoing I Guess? )

[1eos]

your manager needs to calm down... in an alternate universe it would be so funny if you dragged in a rocking chair to your desk. like what is she gonna say now. its honestly a testament to your work ethic that she can only complain about your posture LMAO. sounds like she is reallyyyyy digging deep for reasons to get angry.

but onto my real question. mx kendra when you are developing your original story, what process do you go about designing characters + outlining plot, etc? is it in random bits and pieces or do you try to plan it out chronologically? im not very talented at constructing stories but i do have a few OCs and ideas, but i feel overwhelmed by the idea of planning everything out. i know i ultimately need to sit down and write but i would love some advice or insight if you have any! thank you!

her head would fucking explode if i brought in a rocking chair lmaooooooooooooooooooooooo 😭😭😭😭 and she's scraping the bottom of the barrel and she knows it bc some ppl got 1 on 1 meetings abt their vagues and she couldn't even do it to me bc it would sound so silly to tell someone to sit still

but omg planning a whole story is SO overwhelming. i developed all my stuff in bits and pieces so trying to organize everything has been so daunting BUT not too long ago i became determined to get everything down and i found some youtube videos that really got me together. im doing a comic and struggled with taking the oc lore in my head and merging it into the chronological story i want to tell. bc i have sooooooo much background on a character but that background may not come out until way later in the story u know? and then bc my lore is in prose but the final content would be visual right? so i did some digging and stumbled upon this video!

basically her process is writing everything down in a story format. like just write every detail that comes to mind then create ANOTHER document where u take your prose and start breaking it down into a script like format adding in a bunch of visuals u want and THEN you storyboard from the script. it made a lot of stuff click

and then i edited the process to work for me as someone who's super scattered w my lore. so what im doing now is taking where i want my story to start and just writing. and as each character or story detail is introduced i go to a special section of the document called notes and write out a random bit of lore associated with that. and i'll even write out future events i know i want to happen so when i get to them in the actual chronological story prose i can take what ive already written and insert it into the timeline

so for example when as im following one stream of conscious as to how i want the first chapter to open and i get to an oc's introduction i bold the oc's name and then make a section where i then dump all of the character history that bounces around in my head. and then i go back to the chronological story. and another thing that's helped is when im plotting my story when two characters have an interaction or a character has an interaction w something important that explains a bit of their character i write a breakdown on that moment in that point in time.

for the longest ive tried to do everything chronologically and only write something down once it comes up in the timeline but im accepting that it is NOT the best way for me to work 😭😭😭😭but its been soooooo nice to let myself run free. i'll write out a character's whole backstory in my random tidbit document and then sprinkle it in bit by bit in the chronological timeline document

and it really helps stave away the feelings of being overwhelmed/pressure to be perfectly organized as u write on the first go. ik my process is specifically for comics but even if ure writing a novel maybe this can be of some help 💖

[omniaimy]

Serendipitous Reunion

HELLOOOO, IM BACKKKK. anywayy new story blablabla Lovjoy!Wilbur x reader. This story is a fun one, very sweet and happy. Hope you enjoy!!

REQUESTS OR IDEAS R OPEN!

As the sun dipped below the horizon, casting a warm glow across the city streets, Wilbur Soot stood backstage at the last show of his band Lovejoy's USA tour. The exhilaration of performing for thousands of fans night after night had been an unparalleled rush, but something was missing. He couldn't help but feel a tinge of sadness that Y/N, the love of his life, couldn't be there with him to share in these incredible moments.

Y/N had always been his rock, his confidant, and his biggest supporter. She had been by his side since the early days of his YouTube career, and their bond had only grown stronger as they navigated life's twists and turns together. However, circumstances beyond their control had kept her from joining him on this grand adventure across the Atlantic.

Tonight, as Wilbur stood backstage, his heart ached for her presence. He couldn't help but reminisce about the times they had spent together, the laughter, the inside jokes, and the unbreakable connection they shared. But little did he know, fate had a surprise in store for him.

The crowd's cheers crescendoed as Lovejoy took the stage, their instruments tuning to life. Wilbur's fingers danced across his guitar strings as he poured his heart into every chord. The energy was electric, but even amidst the cheers and applause, his thoughts kept drifting back to Y/N.

Unbeknownst to him, Y/N had been scheming. She had hatched a plan to surprise Wilbur at this very show. Despite the distance that had temporarily separated them, her love for him had only intensified. With a heart full of anticipation, she stood in the front row, right by the stage, with a hopeful smile on her lips.

As Lovejoy's performance reached its peak, the band members exchanged glances, a silent understanding passing between them. Wilbur's eyes scanned the crowd, and in that moment, his heart leaped into his throat. There, in the midst of the audience, stood Y/N, her eyes locked onto his with a mixture of excitement and nervousness.

His fingers faltered for just a moment, the realization hitting him like a tidal wave. Y/N was here. She had managed to surprise him, to bridge the gap that had separated them for too long. The lyrics of the song seemed to take on a new meaning as he sang them, his voice carrying the weight of his emotions.

The set drew to a close, the final notes hanging in the air like a promise of new beginnings. The crowd erupted into cheers and applause, and as the band members took their final bows, Wilbur stepped forward, his gaze fixed on the figure in the front row.

Y/N's heart raced as Wilbur made his way to the edge of the stage. Their eyes met, and in that moment, all the distance and longing melted away. With a grin that matched her own, he extended his hand toward her, fingers intertwining in an unbreakable grip. The barrier between them had vanished, and the connection they shared was stronger than ever.

As the cheers of the crowd faded into the background, Wilbur leaned down, his lips brushing against Y/N's ear. "You surprised me, love," he whispered, his voice carrying the depth of his feelings.

Y/N's smile widened as she looked up at him, her heart overflowing with joy. "I couldn't miss your big finale, could I?"

"No," he replied, his voice steady and full of certainty. "Because you, Y/N, are my finale. My forever."

And in that moment, surrounded by the music, the cheers, and the love that bound them together, Wilbur and Y/N knew that no distance could ever truly separate their hearts. Their story was one of resilience, of love that transcended borders, and of a serendipitous reunion that had made their journey even more beautiful.

Xoxo-Aimy

[kkpaaw]

SPOILERS FOR THE VIDEO GAME "PROCESS OF ELIMINATION" CONTINUE AT YOUR OWN RISK

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This game was amazing! It had me on the edge the entire time I was playing it! And then ending??? When It was revealed that my precious Doleful was the Quartering Duke? I felt...SO betrayed you don't understand.

I was prepared for him to like end up as a potential victim, like maybe his luck in surviving close calls would rum out and we would have to figure out how he got killed despite his danger magnet ability. I was preparing myself for that potential outcome but I was NOT prepared for this.

The ending was SO good but In truth i wish we got more of a follow up ngl. Like Incompetents last line before the epilogue implied that they were gonna do to Doleful what the did with Renegade? Like making him use his abilities for good? At least that's what i got from it?

I could be absolutely wrong because He did get apprehended on the ship but hey, I would like to imagine that they made him useful like that cuz, despite everything his ability is VERY helpful and useful to solving cases (and im just biased as hell and would hate to see him locked up) Dunno how they would force him to help since the little collar Renegade wore wouldn't work because of his invincibility, but hey maybe he can become a permenant partner to Incompetent who would be able to foresee any potential killings he might try and do. Maybe help him turn that mindset he has around. (Also because I ship them two so badly, I swear every alone moment between them was screaming romantic tension)

Also can we talk about this image of my boi??

I was in so much denial up until i saw this and had to give in that he was the Quartering Duke. The music it this scene is also so amazing and eerie. Fits perfectly!

Tho the ending line for the game very much confused me. I honestly have no idea what the line implies but it kinda worries me? Especially considering we were brought to the island for the Detective Elimination Project by Senior (who was working with/for Doleful AKA the Duke). So to have the name of our future project be called that exact same thing? Deeply weird ngl. What exactly are they planning on doing? If anyone who played the game knows what that ending entails please do tell me cuz I'm completely confused.

Workaholic turning out to be Diabolic who was the one who kidnapped us? Wasn't expecting that either. Tho that made him immediately climb up to my top three favorite characters cuz he became SO much more interesting and made me wanna know more about him after that everytime he showed up after? Ya homegirl got hella happy and excited. Was very sad when he died THO i was expecting him too. People who follow the trope he did usually end up being killed so I'm not surprised he died tho i was very sad.

I wasn't expecting Renegade to die tho frfr. Thought he would survive till the end so his murder was unexpected for sure!

Overall I loved the game and I hope more people play it and enjoy it so I can talk to more people about it! I know it gets compared to Danganronpa ALOT (Doesn't help that Wato looks alot like Shuichi) but I fr think it's definitely capable of standing on its own.

My top fav 5 characters

1. Doleful (which is why his truth hurt so much ahshs)

2. Incompetent

3. Workaholic

4. Mystic

5. Bookworm

Alright that's all I got ahsjs

Credit to BAI GAMING on YouTube for the screenshots. Was too lazy to open my copy of the game for them so I got them from him!

[cyphyree]

Now that you've finished utena and it's movies, what was your favorite part? Did you think the movie was a sequel? A retelling? Something else? Some scenes in utena are gonna stick w me till I'm in the dirt n id love to know if you had any like that :33

--

Omgosh!!!! This series 😭😭😭💖 ok bear with me im gonna have a LOT to say affgugyyythh endgame spoilers for Revolutionary Girl Utena the show and movie below

--

Fave parts of the show (in no particular order)

The third transformation scene when Anthy and Utena go to the arena together, badass, just one of the sequences ever

Utena's dorky lil stretches <3

The poisoned tea and biscuit scene

Badminton with Utena, Jury and Miki, along with Nanami ;_;

Miki's stopwatch. Still parsing out what it means but the animation and soundwork is so satisfying

The entire final act of the last episode wrecked me

Wakaba being there for Utena to help her snap out of her depression

Subsequent Utena vs Wakaba battle that breaks my heart into itty bitty pieces

The exploration of Utena's identity, and how she matured from "pretending to be a prince and the misconceptions of what that meant" to ultimately "being a prince"

Jury's backstory with Shiori and how it was visualized

Fave parts of the movie (in no particular order)

SHORT HAIR UTENA!! IN HER LIL BERET!!

The architecture of Ohtori is so cool

Love the opening sequence, especially when it pans up abruptly to the scene with Utena and her prince in silhouette

THEY KISS.

The partner drawing session

The dance <3

Chasing Anthy through the weird corridors of Ohtori after Jury's Duel

The farewell between Utena and Touga (how did they make me like Touga and Utena's relationship)

When they escape together from the maw of the castle in an explosion of roses, and the Shadow Girls guiding them and cheering them on turned out to be Utena and Anthy themselves!

THEY KISS!! AGAIN!!!!!

I actually love how obtuse and playful and surreal the series is, but in a way that's very intentional and gives you all the puzzle pieces to put together what's happening. After finishing the show I felt like I knew what it was about because the themes were so well visualized…… and then I watched one (1) youtube analysis video that made me realize that my understanding has barely scratched the surface of ANything lol. I was kinda embarrassed about it ngl, but I guess RGU is just one of those shows that do require multiple watches. I really, really do love how it's got multiple layers. I'd be happy if I could create a story that's half as clever and nuanced.

The movie was such an unexpected banger. I was told by a friend beforehand that the movie was a retelling+sequel hybrid. After watching it, to me it feels like an alternate version of the story that runs parallel to the one in the anime. Like…… a metaphor for the intention of the show, does that even make sense? I don't think the events or characters themselves are necessarily "canon" in a literal sense, but the philosophies and underlying character motivations are. I definitely see why everyone's like "oh the movie will clear up the themes of the show!! It's great!!" and I love how it clarifies the show by being 250% weirder LMFAO.

I also thought that the absurdity of "your girlfriend turns into a freakin car you drive towards freedom" was going to take me out of it, and it did at first. I was mostly scared for Utena because um that was a scary process, but tbh for the entire ending I had this huge smile on my face. And it was emotional for me even though it's ridiculous!! And that's because it's emotionally resonant!! And it metaphorically confirms for me that, even though Utena was in despair in the last moments we see her in the show, the endings of both the show and movie are ultimately fulfilling and---dare I say?---happy! Because both of them were wrung through the crucible that tore apart their identities, and they ultimately learned and grew, despite how hard and painful it was!

I'm also just so, so, so glad how lgbtq+ the characters and narrative are, and how neither show nor movie shied away from it (I was nervous that the movie was going to retroactively step back, but no, they made it GAYER). And plus how.... tactful and considerate they were when dealing with and visualizing heavier themes. Even the movie was very frank and intentional when portraying nudity. I appreciate that a lot.

What a masterful show. It's going to haunt me forever probably :)

[casual-tarot]

Hello! how are you? Hope you're really fine! there is a boy with whom I felt that I wanted to give him a lot of unconditional affection (more of a friend than a romantic although he also attracted me). Today we stopped talking, he was very rude on several occasions and I blocked him from all sides. I would like to know what your intuition feels about whether this affected him in any way and if he at least managed to appreciate me or my intention to be there for him... I don't know, I feel like he doesn't care about anything and I know he's very selfish and egocentric but I would like to think that he just tries to cover himself with a shell and that maybe deep down I could really make him feel something nice even for a moment or that he needs to talk to me a little now that we are done.

My initials are A.T.G.A♎ I'm from 98 and his are A.K.A ♋ and he's from 99

Bless you!

Hi A.T.G.A! Im doing good. So before I even pulled any cards, I got the vibe that you could use a good laugh. Maybe put on one of your favorite shows or watch some funny videos on YouTube, just for yourself. <3

Ok now, onto the reading.

So I'm immediately getting the vibe of jealousy? I don't think it's as simple as that but it's what immediately came out.

So just for confirmations sake i wanted to know what both sides were feeling. I feel you feel utterly hurt and betrayed, and now it's causing you to seriously doubt yourself(quick note, I just saw the number 444). The cards tell me you're ready to stand tall and level this behind even if it hurts. I think this is good simply because you should never allow others to walk all over you.

Now for A.K.A(interesting initials because the immediate thought I had from that was deceit), so I think on the surface, even to themselves, they feel very triumphant over this. They feel cocky and like they're better then you because of this. They know they've been deceitful and are proud of it even. Howver I feel like deeper under the surface, that he feels sad that he's lost a friend, even if it was his own doing. I think he feels guilty, and is trying to run from his mistakes. I think he likes to think he has the whole world in his hands, like he has everything under control, and like he can manipulate his way into anything if he truly wanted to, but I don't think he's truly fulfilled by this thinking, I mean who would be? I think he's just starting to look at himself more and examine his issues. Not much progress has been made, it's merely the beginning of his journey. Truly, the path he takes is in his hands. This is a transformation for him, a sort of tower moment inflicting forced change. Where he will go from here is up to him. He may change for the better, or he may say egotistical.

I believe the jealousy I was getting earlier is jealousy of you as a person. To him you seem like a genuine person, and someone who is confident in themselves. I think part of his intention was to purposefully shake that confidence you hold, and it seems like it worked, which may be why he still feels so triumphant. He sees in you what he wishes he could be himself, confident, charismatic, and smart/successful. It hurts him that he feels he's not, he likely makes up for it by being egotistical. This is not your issue to fix, that is up to him.

I do think he truly misses you, but he needs to grow first. It's up to you if you want to offer support to him or not, to open up to him again and let a little bit of him in. Don't feel pressured to, take care of yourself first.

I hope this helps, I wish you luck on your journey A.T.G.A. <3

[smogww]

before i write this out let me preface a little.

i can be pretty harsh sometimes, and largely the effortless and restricted cluster-fuck that is tweet threads along with the incentive to be as mean and hate driven as possible to up your exposure did not help me mentally all these years.

sometimes my character is meant to be someone that is just against the world because largely that has been my walk of life. i am not accepted by many, if any, and it really wasn't my choice i just kinda got driven here.

however-

i see this kind of content slop in my youtube feed more and more these days.

and it probably is actually more my fault than youtubes cause i fell down a rabbit hold and spiraled into a major depressive episode that i didn't even realize was happening- yknow what, it doesn't matter.

the point being is not if this is rage bait or not, the point is the attitude this kind of media carries. this entitlement to intrigue that most people ive met seem to have in that-

you are not that interesting.

and i don't necessarily mean that to be insulting, its just fact, people are not as interesting as they want to believe.

but you CAN be.

the problem i see with a lot of people that hit this wall in their social lives is that they have nothing to say to people, which is a problem i have too.

i currently experience that with basically everyone that i don't either have some parental or romantic drive to try and i guess "help"?

as for how to BECOME more interesting...

i haven't figured that out

but i have noticed a common mistake that people tend to make when say..

making new friends

going on dates

hitting social gatherings

hitting up the cashier at your local supermarket

and probably many many more!

the problem being

you aren't offering any real part of yourself first.

you just walk up to people and expect them to have a meticulously crafted buzzfeed-esque laundry list of questions memorized primed and ready to fire at any given point.

it doesn't help the other person for you to constrict the conversation to only things you think to talk about, you have to be open to the narrative that unfolds as you explore the uncommon path.

you have to indulge your intrusive thoughts and not think:

"i like talking about trains, so ill talk about trains, and if they mention anything other than trains ill just steer back to trains."

ive had three hours of sleep in the last two days, maybe 6 in the last 3, im running on fumes at this point so it's honestly very hard to put my thoughts into words at this exact moment.

but i see this kind of attitude a lot in my local area, especially with older people, or people that come from specific social cliques.

but that's the south for you.

the problem is its an internalized entitlement to the idea that everyone needs to take an interest in you specifically and must have something to say and if they don't they are a bad person.

no one has ever cared about me, people walk up in public and call me ugly to my face. people do not defend me, people do not stand up for me. my feelings are never considered in anyone's mind no matter what i do in most every case.

it's not until i fight back and make people scared to confront me that these things are considered, it doesn't matter how nice i try to be.

im just an ugly guy, so it must not matter, or i must deserve it.

so fine, im insane, im "unstable," but let me ask you something. if it were you, if you'd been the one outcast from pretty much everywhere you've ever gone, would you not be the same?

like people already don't like me on sight as someone that fucking sucks just visually, even if they've never met or heard of me before.

something about me just rubs people the wrong way.

when honestly im just generally uncomfortable outside of my home because people get this attitude with me out of nowhere because im an anxious person because people get this attitude with me out of nowhere because im anxious that someone might get this attitude with me out of nowhere and it has led me to become a very angry and distrusting person that would rather be hated than try to make friends.

and no matter how old i get this doesn't seem to change.

people want a character

i craft a character

they hate it

i change the character

they hate that

i stop playing a character

no one is comfortable around me

im not really sure how to end this post, i think i just wanted to straight face this and actually get it off my chest in a more serious and non exaggerated tone.

my point is im very tired of people, and i really don't mean to upset anyone, but no matter where i go or what i do- which options are limited- with my life, i cant seem to really get along with anyone without scaring the shit out of them first.

like presenting myself as a kind of threat that will never come.

or one that was never meant for you?

it's hard to say, im not really sure who i am around others anymore, i only know who i am when im alone.

[elysianslove]

the little things ; haikyuu boys

synopsis; the little things he does that show just how much he loves you

pairings; karasuno x reader, aoba johsai x reader, fukurodani x reader, nekoma x reader, shiratorizawa x reader

genre; fluff

warnings; will make u hate being single <3

karasuno ━━

sugawara koshi; whenever your hair gets caught in anything, he’s so gentle yet quick at fixing it. if your hair is long, and you pull a bag or a shirt and your hair gets tucked in, he’ll wordlessly pull it out. if your hair is short and a bracelet or zipper gets caught he just continues whatever he was doing (talking to someone else for e.g.) while helping you out. also always makes sure your hair isn’t bothering you; if you’re leaning over writing something, he’ll always tuck it behind your ear so lovingly ahhh

daichi sawamura; massages. he’s descended from heaven for this purpose only. his hands are rough and like hard on your muscles, but it’s so perfect. he’ll approach you when you’re in school sitting anywhere, from behind, and just knead his hands into your muscles for a few seconds. euphoric. or if you live together, he always greets you with back/shoulder/neck massages in the bathtub hvjkwkd.

nishinoya yuu; always makes you try his food. always. whether it’s with a group of people or just you two, he just goes “hey babe open ur mouth” with this face 😏 bc he’s cheeky, and just shoves a mouthful of food. spoiler alert, it’s always way too hot. but it’s just tradition at this point. he takes a bite of his food, decides if it’s worthy enough for your mouth or not, then just. yeah.

kageyama tobio; buys you a snack whenever he gets his milk. if you’re special special, he’ll buy you your own carton of milk. he goes up to the vending machine and automatically thinks of you when he sees your fave snack, and it’s like mindless at this point he just routinely does it. it still surprises you to this day, even when he’s so nonchalant about it.

tsukishima kei; kisses your forehead. tsukki is not too big on pda, and even privately he’s not very touchy feely either tbh. but just a simple peck on your forehead grounds you, and it’s a small reminder of the fact that despite his outward coldness, he really does love you. he rarely does it in front of others, but sometimes, he’ll indulge both you and him, and settle a small kiss on your temple just randomly.

asahi azumane; anime jesus always has a hair tie/clip carried around for you on his wrist/in his pockets. i mean he’s always needing them, he just stocks up when he starts dating you. somehow he’s always there when you’re frustrated with your hair all over the place what a savior. later on it evolves to him carrying around your scrunchie and yes the boys make fun yes he blushes but no he does not take it off.

tanaka ryunosuke; carries you on his back, or your things, when you’re too tired to walk. whether that be if you’re too tired because of your heels or you’re just lazy, he just loves helping you out what a respectful gentleman. honestly it just becomes that every time he sees you he like barricades over to you so quick and flips you onto his shoulder or spins you around. anyways. walking with tanaka means walking empty handed bc he will never let you carry anything. ( shifts pile of bags on one arm just to hold your hand ).

hinata shoyo; learns hairstyles to try on you. whether it be short hair or long hair, expect his youtube search history to look a lot like “how to make a french braid” or “cute hairstyles for short hair for your cute girlfriend”. he’s always so entranced by you and watches so carefully whenever you do anything on your hair, and he gets do excited whenever you let him try and he gets it right. also !!! a lot of the times you’ll sit between his legs and he’ll just softly card his fingers through your hair or lightly braid it.

yamaguchi tadashi; buys you flowers a lot. he doesn’t overdo it, just so it doesn’t lose its value and worth. but for example, mondays suck ass and he knows how much you hate them, so he always makes sure to either leave a single rose on your desk/in your locker or give it to you himself if he can. it’s so endearing and motivating honestly, and the constant reminder every once in a while is so cute. continues to do it even like 3 years in, which is so fkn sweet honestly.

nekoma ━━

kuroo tetsurō; plans the best dates. seriously. like not one moment spent with him is dull. i don’t think being with kuroo entails a high energy relationship, i just mean that even a walk in the park is fun with him. he also always knows when to plan a fancy dinner and when it’s just something casual. like he always puts in so much effort, gives 120%, for every date with you. is your favorite band/singer/artist in town? he’s got tickets. the weather is amazing? you’re going to the beach. you’re sleep deprived? nap dates. 10/10

kozume kenma; he teaches you how to play his games. the fact that he’s letting you touch the console in itself says enough, but whenever he buys a new one, and learns it thoroughly enough, he will always sit by you and teach you its ways. picture you sitting in his lap while he guides your hands <333 if you’re not a gamer, he’s actually v flattered by the fact you’re willing to sit through this w him. but if you are a gamer, expect daily competitions. oh and if you beat him? you’re dead to him :).

haiba lev; instead of reaching for things that you’re too short for to grab it himself, he just lifts you up lmfao. i mean w the way he teases yaku, i can imagine he’d be v teasing with you as well if you’re even an inch shorter than him. but fret not! it’s all in the name of love. he’s very loving though, and if he sees you struggling he’ll just wordlessly hoist you up from your waist or something. at first it’s terrifying, but later on it just makes you giggle cause he’s like so willing to do it and it’s effortless for him hehe.

yaku morisuke; always makes sure you’re taking care of yourself, but kinda aggressively? lmao anyways. like he’s always “babe have u eaten” and if u say no expect him to start yelling like “what do you mean no??? are you insane???” v dramatic but honestly <333 he’s always texting you after parting ways “did you get home safe” or on weekends where he cant meet you, he’s asking how it was, if you indulged yourself a bit, relaxed. it’s very sweet and he makes sure it’s not overbearing. he just wants his baby to be healthy and happy.

yamamoto taketora; walks on the side with the cars. it’s not a very noticeable thing, but you see it, and you recognize it. he makes sure he’s always walking where cars are speeding by, a hand on the small of your back guiding you away and to the other side of him. it’s the little notions of protectiveness like if he’s driving and stops suddenly, he’ll put a hand out to keep you from lurching forward, he pushes you gently out of the way before you bump into someone. things like that.

aoba johsai ━━

oikawa tōru; he doodles in your notebooks, or on your skin. if you have class with him, and sit next to him, he’ll always be doodling on your notebook like little hearts or stupid, cute things like your initials + his in a heart. or if you’re at a study date together, and you’re focused on your laptop screen, he’ll leave little encouraging messages on your notes for you to notice when you’re revising. sometimes you’ll be sitting with him at lunch or even if you’re out w him and a bunch of other people, and he happens to have a pen. expect a little smiley face on your inner wrist, or a heart plus his initials ( o.t. )

iwaizumi hajime; he helps you take off your make up/takes it off for you. if you’re too sleepy, he’ll just take the products he’s used to seeing you use and start following it step by step after he props you up next to the sink. while he stands between your thighs he just so gently starts rubbing at your skin and washing away the make up. if you’re already asleep, he’ll have to like google the steps oh my god im gonna cry hes so cute. if you don’t necessarily wear make up, then he’ll just help you do your nightly routine, or even your shower routine, like using a body scrub or a face mask or, bruh, even shaving lmfao.

hanamaki takahiro; saves everything you buy/send/make him. i mean everything. has literally over two thousand photos of you, all the polaroids or postcards are saved in a little box he has under his bed. anything you make him (unless it’s edible) he has. if you make him a small embroidery thing he will literally attach it to his sports bag or something. any chain you make him is automatically added to his keychain. that flower crown you made with him on one of your first dates? he still has it. the flowers are dead but the memory loves babyyyy

matsukawa issei; carries extra clothes of his for you to borrow. hey have i mentioned that mattsun is big? 😃 because he is 😃. meaning regardless of your size or height or whatever, his clothes will drown you <3 i see him as preferring more oversized or just loose shirts rather than tight ones, so yk. on you???? if y’all are just hanging out and you even think about being slightly cold — here have five options of mattsun’s clothes to choose from. he always makes sure they smell like him too. it’s self indulgent really, because he loves the way they look on you, and he loves that it leaves a trace of his scent on you. territorial? i think yes.

fukurodani ━━

bokuto kōtarō; always hugs you like it’s the last time he’ll see you. sometimes, even if he doesn’t know it, you need his hugs badly. y’all are gonna try and tell me bokuto doesn’t give the best fkn hugs??? yeah get outta here with that bs. he SO does. he either kneels down and wraps his arms around your waist, picks you up, and spins you around, like he hasn’t seen you in 3 years, or he’ll just wrap his arms around your neck and pull your head to his chest, cradling it, and just sighing like he won’t see you for the next 3 years. his hugs always make you feel so much better, even if you weren’t feeling down to begin with.  

akaashi keiji; plays with your hands and caresses them. it’s the delicate feel and gentleness of it all. akaashi’s generally an anxious person, leaving him very fidgety. but once you two get together, and he starts being comfortable with you, expect to find your hand always between the two of his, just fondling with him. he’ll trace random figurines on the back of your hand, or have his fingers ghost over your wrist and up to your fingertips. if his hands are especially shaky, expect him to just grab one of your yours and hold it tightly between the grasp of two of his. it conveys trust, and all you have to do is kiss his knuckles gently and he’s melting.

konoha akinori; he has your reminders app linked with his, and sneaks in small, motivating messages. every once in a while you’ll get a notification from the app that tells you to drink water or have a snack (or text konoha he’s bored and he misses you). also always sends you pictures to distract you from stress. like it could literally just be a picture of him smiling with a thumbs up and you’d just ,,, melt bc you love him so much.

shiratorizawa ━━

ushijima wakatoshi; he has so many plants that are named after you, or your nicknames, and he’s like so gentle with them too. like strokes their petals and speaks to them so softly, the same way he does with you. you’re honestly so curious how he hasn’t run out of names, but he’s just a genius like that. whenever you go over to his place, and he’s bought a new one, he’ll take your hand and guide you to where it’s growing and just be like “look it’s baby y/n” and you just 🥺🥺🥺

semi eita; he has a playlist on his phone, that’s constantly being updated, for you and him to listen to. the first time he showed it to you, you were stargazing and he took out his phone and headphones and was like “i made a playlist for you wanna list” and every part of your body lit up in flames im not joking. now, a lot of the times, you’re coming back home on a train, and your head is on his shoulder and you’re sharing headphones listening to the playlist. when either one of you is driving you’re blasting it (a lot of the playlist is the hsm soundtrack)

satori tendō; tendo reads people so well, and being in a relationship with him means he will read you so well. so a lot of the times, in social situations, he’ll recognize the signs of you wanting to leave, for example, or if someone’s bothering you, he’ll know exactly how to approach it too. this also entails having a lotta inside jokes hehe, and also just like. talking with your eyes. yk that thing. yeah. all you have to do is look at him a certain way, and he just knows exactly what you just said.

goshiki tsutomu; he buys the both of you this small plushie, and whenever you’re missing each other you just. squish it. and he squishes his. he would rather die than let anyone know this, but you’re not too keen on letting anyone know yourself tbh. it’s just this little thing you have, and it means a lot more to you than just this. when he first bought it he was like “look we have matching plushies” and you passed away on the spot ❤️

shirabu kenjirō; loves trying out new recipes with you. he’s not too big on cooking or baking, but there’s just something about doing it with you that really — hits the spot yk. nowadays, whenever he comes across a new recipe on social media that he thinks you’ll like he just automatically sends it to you like with no words no texts just the post and you’re like “OMG CAN WE DO THIS” and he’s like “why else would i send it. yes we can :)” hvskwkeke

end note;  thank you sm for the love on my last two posts!! i’m glad you guys enjoyed them sm. if you have any requests, they’re open and i’m happy to deliver, mwah!

[my-mt-heart]

Long ask sorry.

Im a bit lost honestly. I watched the caryl scenes of 11.21 and im conflicted. I refuse to watch the "donnie" scenes especially since if u look at comments on youtube lots of people are like "oh my God Donnie is happening she made him giggle i wasnt dreaming and he's so worried for her"

And then u have this reviewver saying carol's openly in love with daryl now wich uh, maybe, but, actually, no? This is still too subtle for my sanity

Yes, the fact that she mentions HIM to Maggie while in tears ("i was apart from him when we arrived" not exact quote here...) and not Zeke her supposed ex husband is telling, but from his side, nothing is really telling. And when she talked to him about Connie, i can tell u that in a way it made me worried because GA seems to believe it confirms his feelings for Connie, and the way he acts doesnt help, but at the same time it reminds me of when they were looking for Beth.

He was worried and she was there for him. And he definitely wasnt in love with Beth but he cared for her deeply. The thing is that Connie is not a teen, she's a 40 something (at least the actress is) strong bad ass woman and worrying that this time might be different than with his feelings for Beth doesnt seem ridiculous. But i see the way Carol looks at him (and honestly she has been looking at him that way, i mean not subtle at all, since stradivarius for me, Zeke never really stood a chance in the long run, Henry dead or not) and i know u believe they cant go the "she loves him he doesnt" way, but for the scenes i've seen , he's still too cold with her for me. And she's like a lost puppy who dont know how to make things go back to how they were between them and who's suffering so much with the situation and i cant anymore. I hate it

And Im lost. She definitely believes she doesnt deserve him especially after the cave incident and im sick of it. Lets say he doesnt love her back, at least stop being cold to her.

An another part of me, maybe the desillusional one, is still thinking that the fact that she really seems in love with him now cant be for nothing, with 3 episodes left, and that if he's still so much at odds with her its not for nothing either. Connie is alive, the cave incident is long forgotten and forgiven by everyone else in team family, including Connie and Kelly, the fact that he's still cold is very telling: it was never about just Connie but about trust being broken ("dont bullshit me"). We know that. But she keeps pushing him towards Connie and she takes his hand and looks at him like he's the moon and the stars and he's still kind of strange towards her. Im so lost, honestly. Im not even sure we will have answers before the end, they could still let everything open to keep both shippers for the daryl spin off. But what i want is for him to warm up to her like before. And its patethic that we have, i mean i have, to beg for it. We re talking about Caryl here. His f...ing feud with Rick was awful, but all was forgotten with a simple "i'd die for you". Cant we have something like that at least for the last season with 3 ep left between Caryl? Especially since there is no caryl spin off in sight anymore? Is that too much to ask? For Caryl, really? Its been horrible between them since 10.03 give or take some nice moments... for me anyways. And its been way too long. Im so lost. Im sorry.

Don’t be sorry. Pretty sure the intention is to make us feel anxious right now, which I know is super frustrating when there’s not a lot of runway left. Even though we’ve all had enough of the subtlety, don’t be so quick to dismiss the *many* visual cues because they still matter a lot (like SF mentioned). The physical distance we often see between them suggests there’s an emotional distance too, yes, but you have to imagine it’s something that’s going to be bridged and how do you convey that visually? With a callback to the terminus reunion maybe? That’s what I’m hoping for anyway.

As far as Daryl’s “coldness” goes, POV is also something to take note of. We’re seeing things through Carol’s eyes, which is why the Daryl and Connie beats feel played up. She thinks she broke her friendship with Daryl because she let Connie get hurt and she doesn’t want that to happen again. She doesn’t want to take away Daryl’s happiness. But like you said, the issue goes much deeper than Connie. In season 10, when we saw things through Daryl’s eyes, he was heartbroken because Carol was essentially running away from him. He asked her to follow his light and take his hand, but in a metaphorical way, she didn’t (couldn't). Now we’re seeing her reciprocate hence the light/dark imagery in 20 and the hand holding in 21. I’m glad you brought up Beth. That’s a great parallel too. They want to save somebody they couldn't save before and they're working as a team to do it.

I hope this helps a little bit. Obviously I don't know for sure what's going to happen, but I think there's reason to hope. TWD loves ship baiting, but placating Donnie fans isn’t going to do much for AMC in the end. They’re a significantly smaller sector of the fanbase than Carylers, who they’ve been profiting off of for years  and still can if they give us something that’ll make us happy.