#hello..... here's my shotgun dragon

[ranticore]

various dragons. partway through i was like well is there really any need for something so adapted to flight to be any good on land? so they're a bit like bats in that regard. the design is extremely simple and slightly generic because i wanted something that wouldn't frustrate me to tears if i chose to draw them (looking at you, pern dragon wings). these guys are all small, agile classes which usually have a single rider, but there are Much bigger classes and some with really specialised abilities as well. the ones in the second pic are a slightly longer interceptor class, less agile.

anyway the dragons naturally communicate using electromagnetic radio waves using the specialised structures on their head. the small type can also use the front holes as the outlet for their breath weapon - this way it can be fired without opening the mouth (which would massively increase drag). at high speeds, a flamethrower doesn't work super well so they shoot out burning magnesium projectiles (the visual effect is similar to decoy flares, and they will throw off the thermal vision of their enemies). the rider also has a long gun mounted on a swivel, but this is usually deployed against stationary targets or airships instead of enemy dragons.

their wings are painted with the distinctive shorthand designs of their home base, allowing their allegiance to be known at a glance and to prevent friendly fire.

[skybrushus]

Note. To the best of my knowledge this is not based on any existing Fallout Equestria storyline, nor does it follow any particular plot in Fallout 4. This is just the narrative that popped into my head as I worked on this piece.

    Amber stepped out of the vault and squinted as the late morning light assaulted his eyes. Amber's outdoor excursion was driven by his desire to speak to Vault 69's resident armorer Lock n' Load about some repairs that were being done on his rifle. As such the hybrid pony/dragon felt rather naked just carrying his holster 9mm pistol.

    However the stallion reminded himself that there was four of the vault's sharpshooters to keep an eye on the area surrounding for raiders and dangerous wildlife. One of those sharpshooters was Coco Pommel with her 14.5x114mm anti-tank rifle. Link

     The stallion had been told by another vault armorer that had Lock n' Load needed to go outside to test fire a weapon. Thus his outdoor journey. Amber wondered why Lock n' Load had to go outside to test fire a weapon since vault's indoor firing range could handle everything up to 30mm autocannon ammunition?

      There was suddenly a series of quick shots and the stallion followed the sound. He quickly found 4 mares standing in front of a hastily setup shooting range. One was the vault armorer; standing next to burly earth pony mare was 2 pegasus mares that Amber recognized as being from Stable 69.

    However the other pony was new to Amber. A fuchsia colored earth pony mare wearing an eye patch and festooned in black leather garments was firing a rather short, brutal looking shotgun. It was a rather unorthodox device. 8 barrels of 20ga were arranged in a circular cluster. As Amber watched the earth pony quickly shouldered the shotgun and fired 4 more rounds. Then the mare unlocked the action and smartly snapped downward exposing the chambers. With her left hand she reached for a large stud inside at the center of the barrel cluster and then smartly yanked it back. As the stallion watched the spent shotshells were ejected from the barrels. Then with practiced efficiency the mare began extracting new shells from a belt around her waist and started reloading the chambers when that was accomplished Lock n' Load look at the 2 pegasus mares.

      "Okay get us a brisk wind going away from us. Then we'll test gas discharger."

       The mares took off and came to an hover about 8ft off the ground. Then they began vigorously flapping their wings. As they did a steady breeze started blowing away from themselves and the other ponies gathered there. The fuchsia looked at the armorer who nodded her head. The other mare shouldered the weapon and pulled the trigger from forward trigger group. Suddenly a large cloud of whitish vapors and a tight stream of liquid erupted from the weapon. All of this enveloped a rudimentary mannequin about 7yds away. Obviously it had been setup for this demonstration. After a second this began to disperse away from the ponies gathered.

        Amber spoke as he walked up the small group. "Well that's a very distinctive demonstration." He looked at the newcomer. "And hello. My name is Amber....and you would be?"

        The newcomer gave the stallion a quizzical look. "Name is Cheerilee. Are you a member of this Vault?"

        The stallion grinned. "Yep! And who would you be and what do you do around here?"

        Cheerilee frowned. "I'm a school teacher."

         Lock n' Load spoke up answering the question that was rolling around in Amber's mind. "We're doing this test outside because the firing range's ventilation and filtration system is on the fritz and I didn't want to flood the vault's air circulation system with tear gas."

        This is a Patreon reward for Skyline-Twilight. The weapon she's holding is a prototype Colt Hillberg Defender shotgun. It's a very obscure weapon. Not even Ian at Forgotten Weapon Link has done a video on it yet. So most of the reference images and information I had came from the 1978 book The World's Fighting Shotgun written by Thomas F. Swearengen. Link He had wrote an extensive article in the book on it. It was a developed to fire 20ga shotshells while having a nonlethal tear gas dispenser built into the weapon.

I hope you like what you see. Please help make more art like this possible by supporting me at Patreon

[gazs-blue-hat]

Gaz’s Blue Hat  Masterlists and introduction! (Please Read Me!)

Hello! I’m Val, or “the hat”. I love the CoD universe and have watched play throughs of most of the games. At the moment, I’m only writing for 141 and possibly other main characters throughout the story.

If you do not have your age in your bio, you’re getting blocked. I’m sorry but this is an 18+ blog. I don’t feel comfortable with minors interacting with my things.

Another thing. I will write rough topics. I’ve struggled with Suicide, Self Harm, Sexual Abuse, Addiction and many other vices. I feel like there (rightfully) is a lot of hesitation to write these topics. However, I find comfort in stories. Of course I’ll put trigger warnings on every piece I do, but I want to let you know that you’re seen and you’re heard. Final thing and I'll stop my rambling, I promise. I won't tolerate hate here. I do my best to stay educated on things and thus, this is a safe place for people to ask questions and learn about things they might not know about. Be kind folks.

Key: 

💖-Fluff

🪄 -Silly

🩸-Whump

☠️-Angst

❤️‍🔥-Smut

Series

-Fair Winds and Following Seas- Simon Riley x Reader (Tempest) 

Read on Ao3: Here!

Chapter 1: Pilot

Chapter 2: The Winding Road of Introductions

Chapter 3: The Calm Before the Storm

Chapter 4: Speed of Sound (Wip)

Glacial Tides- King!Johnny MacTavish X Siren!Reader

Masterlist Found Here!

--------------------------------------- Small Town UA- Hiatus

-Sunflowers and Shotguns (Small Town UA)- Soap x Reader (Lamb) 💖🩸

Welcome

Southern Hospitality

Around the Fences

Air Pressure

Tornado Sirens (Wip)

Toxemia (wip)

-Injections and Ivermectin (Small Town UA)- Ghost X Reader (Tens)💖

Moos Malady 

Like Little Railroads

Riley and Riley (Wip)

Concussion (Wip)

CPR (Wip)

Fireplace (Wip)

-Books and Bombshells (Small Town UA)- Gaz x Reader (Keys)

Books Bring Us Together

WPM (Wip)

Dewy Decimal System (Wip)

Movie night (Wip)

Kickstarter (Wip)

Dog-earing (Wip)

-Waves and Warfare (Small Town UA)- Price X Reader (Skip)

Captain to Captain

Come a little closer (Wip)

Kate Kate Kate (Wip)

High Seas (Wip)

Depth Charge (Wip)

Songs of the Deep (Wip)

-TF141 and the WSM- (Small town UA blurbs)

Wear the hat, ride the cowboy 🪄

Beware the Wave Soaked Maidens (Wip)

---------------------------------------

Dungeons and Dragons AU (All characters have three parts)

Seeing isn’t everything (Kyle “Gaz” Garrick X F!Reader) (Medusa)

Pt. 1

Pt. 2

Pt. 3

Songs across Seafoam (Johnny “Soap” MacTavish X F!Reader) (Siren) (Wip) 💖🩸❤️‍🔥

Pt. 1

Pt. 2

Pt. 3

Shapes in the Mists (Simon “Ghost” Riley X F!Reader) (Changeling) (Wip) 💖☠️❤️‍🔥

Pt.1

Pt.2

Pt.3

Curls of Smoke and Embers (Captain John Price X F!Reader) (Dragon) (Wip) 💖☠️🩸❤️‍🔥

Pt.1

Pt.2

Pt.3

--------------------------------------- One Shots

Captain John Price 

Left Behind ( Wip) 💖🩸

Yours to command ❤️‍🔥

Wedding ring (blurb)❤️‍🔥

Cherry stem (blurb) mild❤️‍🔥

Bad day (blurb) 💖

Simon “Ghost” Riley

Potent Poisons and Precious Passions (Fem!Reader) 💖❤️‍🔥

Loving Something So Broken (Gn!Reader)☠️💖

Forged in Blood, Bonded by Steel (wip) 💖❤️‍🔥

Hearts Do Mend ☠️💖 (Slight❤️‍🔥)

Cherry Stem (blurb) mild❤️‍🔥

Tags (Blurb) ❤️‍🔥

Bad day (Blurb) 💖

Johnny “Soap” MacTavish 

Whispers in the Night (Wip) 💖❤️‍🔥

Domestic Bliss (wip) ❤️‍🔥💖

Cherry Stem (blurb) mild❤️‍🔥

Desperate (Blurb) ❤️‍🔥

Bad Day (Blurb) 💖

Talking you Through it (Blurb) (Capt. MacTavish) ❤️‍🔥

Headboard (Blurb) (Capt. MacTavish) ❤️‍🔥

Kyle “Gaz” Garrick

Passing Notes 💖

Cherry Stem (blurb) mild❤️‍🔥

Natural Remedy (Blurb) ❤️‍🔥

Bad Day (Blurb)

Paperwork Shmaperwork 💖

Alex Keller

K.I.A to C.I.A (Wip)💖❤️‍🔥

Konig

Love on the Battlefield (WIP)💖❤️‍🔥

Keegan P. Russ

Rupert’s Drop (WIP) 💀🩸

No Nut November (Blurb) ❤️‍🔥

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Blurbs

No Pairings, just brainrot

What really happened at the end of MWIII

————————————————————————————————————————————————————————————

🩸Whumptober🩸

Intro (Please Read)

Character taking care of Reader Whumptober list

Reader taking care of Character Whumptober list

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Reblogged Masterlists

These will be complete lists of everything I have ever reblogged about these characters. I don't like the Tumblr Tagging system to look through my stuff so I made my own list like this. I'll be going backwards from present day to the very start of this blog (June)

(11/5/2023 update): I'm working hard on linking and sorting everything I have reblogged. I have organized up to October. Everything that has yet to be linked will have the tag 'To Be Linked' on it. Feel free to rummage through the bins while I get my books on a shelf. Thank you for your support!

Simon "Ghost" Riley

Johnny "Soap" MacTavish

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick

John Price

All Others /Multiple

[galexystern]

butterfly wings

chapter three; fall 1984

pairing; steve harrington/eddie munson/reader aka steddie/reader, steve/reader, eddie/reader

rating; T

warnings; fluff, angst, au - canon divergence, fucked up the timeline a bit, smoking weed, shotgunning smoke

word count; 3.8k

desc; eddie gives you a nice surprise, steve gets to know you better, and all three of you share some smoke.

read on ao3 / series masterlist

Winter comes and goes. In fact, the whole rest of the school year comes and goes in a flash. The summer comes in hot and heavy, and you suffer in the sweltering bookstore. You swear that you'll get another job next summer if they don't add air conditioning. You beach it up with Nina and Mark. You and your friends take a road trip into Illinois and hit Chicago hard. You attend the annual Taste of Chicago and explore the State of Illinois Center. You even manage to find a gay bar—Jesse goes wild under your and Hailey's supervision and Vickie's awkward flirting somehow nags her a girl's number. She gets embarrassed every time any of you bring it up, but you can each tell she's proud too.

Junior year sneaks up on you and hits you like a freight train. It doesn't even slow down, just pushes you into the deep end as soon as it starts. You try out for the fall play and drag Jesse into auditioning too. Surprise—he loves it (he's an English nerd like you, so you knew he would). The difficulty dial turns up on all your classes except math, which has never been your strong suit. While you're stuck a year behind everyone else, you're pleasantly surprised to find Eddie in your class.

"Well hello there, stranger," he says as you take the desk next to his.

"Hi!" You exclaim, happy to have a friend in the class.

Eddie laughs at your enthusiasm. "That's the most excitement I've seen for a math class in a long time."

"Oh, yeah," you say sarcastically. "I'm all about math. I dream of it at night."

"And here I am, a fool for dreaming about you instead." He winks and you blush madly. You set up your notebook and pencil perfectly, just for something to do instead. You hear Eddie chuckle and then there's a loud handclap from Mrs. Dolip, making everyone jump.

"If she's gonna do that every day, I'm gonna have a heart attack," Eddie whispers to you under his breath.

"Don't worry," you whisper back, "I know CPR."

You can feel his eyes on you and you know you're still blushing, but you also smirk, all the while watching your teacher write the first lesson on the board.

A week later, while Mrs. Dolip is blabbing on about equations, Eddie speaks out of the side of his mouth. "Have you thought about my Hellfire offer at all?"

You wince and shake your head minutely.

"Okay, angel. No sweat." Your breath hitches at the pet name. "Just keep it in the back of your mind for me." You nod and he lounges back in his desk.

Another week later, Eddie stops paying attention to the worksheet you two are supposed to be finishing and props his head on his hand. "You know, D&D is a lot more fun than this."

You give him a look. "Anything would be more fun than this." The page is full of fractions that keep drifting away from your eyes.

"Fair," he muses, "but D&D would be as fun as doing the school plays. I know you enjoy those."

"I do, but there are things I enjoy more, you know."

"Like what?"

"Reading. Fleetwood Mac. Cats. Taking a walk by the Seine."

"Paris, huh?" You nod. "But what about an alternate world where magic exists and fairies are spiteful and dragons terrorize villages and wizards command the elements?"

"Sounds a little dark for my tastes."

"You're the one who said Fleetwood Mac." He gives a cheeky smile. You roll your eyes and get back to work.

A month after that, just when you've forgotten about D&D, Eddie says after class one day, "You could be a princess, you know. Or a bard. Or a really good thief who always takes what they need but must leave something they want."

"What?"

He shrugs. "It's a curse. Balance is necessary."

You put your pile of books on your desk and turn to him. "Eddie, what are you doing?"

"A great question, milady." He beams. "I'm courting you."

"You're what?" You feel like you're choking on the words.

"To be my apprentice," he clarifies. "My successor."

"Oh." There's a faint sense of disappointment. "Well—"

"Before you say anything, just gimme some more time. I've got some tricks up my sleeve." He winks but there's a pleading in his voice. "Gimme a chance."

You study him, fingers adorned with silver rings constantly fidgeting at his sides, hair wavy and out of control, the same faded leather jacket he always wears shining in the florescent lights.

You sigh. "Okay."

He brightens considerably. "Really?"

"Yeah. Court me or whatever."

"That I can do, angel!" With that, he sprints out the door. You follow at a leisurely pace, not really sure what you're getting yourself into.

;

The next Steve-and-Nancy drama comes around, except this time, you're somehow in the middle of it. It was a crazy sequence of events that led up to it. It started at home.

"I'm going to the store. Do you need anything?" Nina had called from the foyer while putting on her shoes.

"Um," you'd uselessly shouted back while thinking. "We need Pop-Tarts and lemonade. Maybe also some Arnold Palmer's? And tampons please!"

"Check, check, and check," and then she was out the door.

About twenty minutes later, you heard a honk from outside—your sister's way of telling you she's back and to come help with the groceries. You slipped on some boots and grabbed the first heavy jacket you felt in your closet, since a chill had set in recently. You walked out the door, down the stairs, and to the car. Nina had the trunk open and you pulled out one of the bags. You started walking back to the building, not paying enough attention evidently, because you ran into someone halfway through the parking lot.

As if in slow motion, the bag broke open and things went flying. Nothing broke but it was almost worse what actually happened: a box hit the ground with abnormal force and sprang open, propelling tampons into the air. You looked at the person you bumped into through the spray and were mortified to find Steve Harrington staring back at you with a smirk.

Worse still, when the tampons had fallen back to the ground and rolled around on the pavement, Steve reached out and pinched the jacket you were wearing. "I wonder where I've seen this before," he teased.

You looked down and sure enough, you were wearing Steve's letterman jacket.

You just froze, staring at nothing with wide eyes, sure that this whole situation could not get worse. And yet, it did.

"Steve!" Nina said happily, joining the two of you. "Where have you been?"

"Hi, Nina. Just around. At school, practice," he answered cordially, still looking at you with mirth in his eyes.

"We've missed you. You have to come for dinner. What are you doing tonight?"

"Absolutely nothing," and you could hear the cheekiness oozing from the words. "I'd be honored to join."

"Great!" With that, she just walked away and disappeared into the building.

"Oh my god," you breathed, and Steve finally burst into laughter. "Oh my god," you repeated, moaning this time.

"Your face! It was priceless!" There were tears in his eyes. "That was the best thing I've seen in a long time."

That piqued your interest, but it could be examined later. You had to survive this mortification. "I'm so sorry," you said, "I'm so sorry!" You dropped the broken bag, scattering more items, as you rushed to pull off his jacket. "I forgot!"

Steve's hands darted out and stopped yours from moving. You looked up at him. He was smiling. "There's nothing to apologize for, beautiful. You don't have to take it off now. It's cold out here." He dragged it back over your shoulders and you had to hold in a shiver. "I wouldn't be much of a gentleman if I made you strip out here."

Your eyes widened and he laughed again. In an effort to draw attention elsewhere, you dropped to the ground and started collecting the tampons and other stuff. Steve joined you. You tried to use the bag but it was useless. Without any other option, you took the tampons and shoved them in the pockets of the jacket, making him laugh again, louder this time. You laughed too, seeing the ridiculousness in it all. All you and Steve could do was laugh for a minute, just crouching in the middle of the parking lot.

As the giggles faded and breathing evened, you started picking up the other things. "Here," Steve said, and held out his shirt, making a kind of basket. You giggled again as you piled items into the makeshift pouch, until everything was off the ground. You two stood and both supported the weight of his shirt.

"I never imagined I would kind of understand what it's like to be pregnant," Steve joked, and it took a lot of effort not to become completely useless due to laughter.

You both got inside and helped put away the groceries. You were thankful Nina had already started cooking and didn't seem to notice how you'd carried the items inside. As soon as everything was away, Nina was directing you and Steve to help prepare and dinner got underway.

A few hours later, after you'd finished eating and cleaning up the table, you and Steve escaped to your room. "Here," you said sheepishly, handing him his letterman jacket. He took it with a grin and laid it on the back of your desk chair. You sat on your bed while he examined your room.

He looked at your collection of manatees. "Each one is from a new city we've moved to," you explained.

"There's so many." Steve sounded both awed and a little sad.

"Yeah, we've been a lot of places."

"Why?"

"Nina and I are army brats. Dad was moved from base to base a lot. It was cool to see the world, but making friends was always hard." You breathed deep. "They died a couple years ago. Car crash. Can you believe it? Dad was in the fucking military and a random accident is what officially takes them away?"

"I'm sorry." His voice was gentle and soft and kind.

You forced your voice to stop wobbling. "Anyway, Nina got custody. We've moved a couple times so she could find a good enough job to take care of us both. But her job at the hospital here is really nice. She likes it a lot. And it feels pretty stable."

"Where's the one for here?"

"We haven't been able to find one yet. We do have to get it local and for some reason, Hawkins just doesn't sell manatee merchandise." Steve looked back at you and matched your grin.

"What's your favorite one?"

You stood and moved to join him. You picked out a small, delicate manatee. "This one's from Hawaii. We weren't there for very long, but we found this at a tiny shop in Maui. Hand-carved and hand-painted."

"It's beautiful." But Steve was still staring at you.

"Thanks," you whispered, face heating. Realizing your position, you cleared your throat and stepped away. "So, um, how's Nancy?"

It was like being doused in cold water. Steve's expression hardened, though he carefully returned the manatee to its rightful place before stalking away. "It's fine."

"Sounds like it." You said it simply, but it broke through. Steve sighed and perched on the end of your bed. You sat next to him. "Wanna talk about it?"

"I don't even really know what's wrong," he started, sounding confused and lonely. "This past year was great. I thought we were past all the stuff from last year. But...it feels different. Feels like something's off."

"Have you asked her about it?" He shook his head. "Might be a good place to start. Communication is key."

His lip quirked up. "Maybe." There was silence for a few minutes. You were just about to touch his hand when he sprang up from the bed. "So what are you doing for Halloween?"

Shocked by the sudden topic change, you stammered, "Um, something with my friends? Like...horror movie night? Maybe?"

Steve nodded seriously. "Are you dressing up?"

"I'm not sure. I have an idea but there's not really anywhere to wear it."

He lit up. "Come to the party! Tina's party! Nancy and I will be there. And you can bring your friends."

"Are you sure?" Your brow furrowed.

"Totally! It'll be fun. Here," he grabbed a pen and scribbled something onto a piece of paper on your desk, "that's her address. Easy to get to from here!"

"Um...okay—"

"Great!" He beamed. "Well, I gotta go! Those essays won't write themselves!" With that, he awkwardly dashed from the room, grabbing his jacket in the process.

"Bye, I guess," you said to the empty room, completely bewildered.

;

And that's how you're here, at Tina's Halloween party.

"Are you sure we're invited?" Vickie asks nervously.

"Duh!" Jesse replies, already dancing to the beat, "Steve invited us personally."

You shrug, feeling a little helpless. "He did."

"So let's have some fun!" Hailey yells. She grabs Jesse's hand and they plunge into the crowd, immediately heading for the dance floor. You look at Vickie, who looks right back at you.

"Drinks?" You offer.

"Drinks." She confirms.

So you two also head into the fray, in the opposite direction, eventually finding a communal punch bowl that must have six different kinds of alcohol in it for how pungent it smells. You and Vickie ladle some into cups and try it.

"That's nasty," Vickie coughs. You agree. You both keep drinking.

"Hey, you made it!" You hear Steve before he appears, dressed like Tom Cruise in Risky Business. He stops short when he sees you fully. "Whoa."

You look down self-consciously. "Does it look okay?"

"You look sick!" He exclaims. "Not sick like ill, but like super cool. Carrie is such a good choice. Who did the blood?"

"Jesse, Hailey, and I took turns," Vickie answers, and Steve grins.

"Looks awesome!"

"Thanks, Steve." You try not to blush. "Hi, Nancy," you add when you see the girl appear next to him.

She smiles—well, more like grimaces—in greeting before taking a cup and dipping it right into the punch bowl. You and Vickie exchange a side glance, but Steve just follows her lead. "Let's dance," she shouts to him. He gives her a thumbs-up and waves at you and Vickie before disappearing into the crowd.

"Something's not right there," Vickie says to you. You already knew that, but you didn't want to see it right in front of you either.

"I'm gonna get some air," you tell her. She nods and you weave through the people, finally finding the doors leading to the deck and backyard. When they slide open, the cool air is a relief on your hot skin, and you breathe deep in relief.

"Didn't expect to see you here, princess."

You jump at the voice and turn to see Eddie leaning against the side of the deck, surrounded by a cloud of smoke. "Jesus Christ," you choke out.

"I gotta stop scaring you, angel, or I'm gonna have to give you CPR. And I'm not certified." You half-smile, heart still racing. Seeming to sense that, Eddie motions to you. "Come sit down. Get your breath back."

You do as he recommends and sit in the chair next to him. Good thing it's metal, otherwise the fake blood you're wearing would soak in.

"You look great, by the way," Eddie appraises. "Superb fake blood placement. Very authentic."

You smile in thanks, still calming down. "What're you doing here?" You ask when you feel you can.

He holds up a metal lunchbox. "You don't know I'm the local dealer?"

You shake your head. It's news to you, but not altogether surprising. You tell him as much.

He chuckles. "I'm guessing you're not out here to buy?"

"No. Just to get some fresh air."

"Well, shit." He starts to wave away the smoke from his almost-spent joint. "Sorry, princess."

You wave a hand. "It's fine. Actually..." Eddie raises an eyebrow in interest. "I'd be down. To partake. If I can."

"Course you can," he says with a wicked grin. He pulls a fresh joint from behind his ear. "And for you, pretty lady, it's on the house." You go to grab it, but he brings it out of reach again. "But only if we can share."

You nod eagerly and Eddie claps his hands together. "Excellent." He drags a chair over and sits next to you. He hands you the joint and you put it between your lips. Expecting for him to hand you the lighter, you're startled when he leans forward instead, flicking on the flame and lighting it for you. As you inhale, the burning embers set his face aglow a little. He's very pretty.

You finally exhale, releasing the smoke into the air. "Well done, angel," he says, impressed. You shrug nonchalantly as he takes his drag. When he exhales, he creates little rings out of the smoke.

"Whoa! Can you teach me to do that?" You ask excitedly.

He laughs. "Of course."

A little while later, first joint gone and second started, you're just about getting the hang of smoke rings when the door slams open. You and Eddie both turn your heads quickly to see Steve in the doorway, breathing heavily.

"Steve?" You say hesitantly. He looks at you. He has devastation written all over his face. "What's wrong?"

"Can I get a hit?" He asks, ignoring your question.

Eddie hands the joint over without argument, clearly seeing what you're seeing. Steve takes a long drag before exhaling loudly, relaxing as he does. He collapses in the chair near you and Eddie.

"It's over."

"What's over?" You ask.

"Me and Nancy."

Eddie sucks in through his teeth. "That sucks, man."

"Steve, I'm so sorry."

"She called me 'bullshit'," he spits out. "Called our whole relationship 'bullshit'." His tone turns sad. "Said she doesn't love me anymore."

You feel terrible for him. "Steve, you're not bullshit."

"Apparently I am." He inhales from the joint again.

You pluck the joint away, take a quick drag, and hand it to Eddie. Placing a hand on Steve's, you order gently, "Steve, look at me." He swings his head to you sadly, eyes heavy. "You are not bullshit." He scoffs but you interrupt. "Steve." He shuts his mouth. "You are not. bullshit."

Steve gazes at you, then directs his attention to Eddie. "She's right, man," Eddie confirms. Steve looks back at you. You give him a small smile, which he eventually returns.

Temporarily resolved, you turn to Eddie and motion for the joint. You suck in greedily, inhaling quickly. You hold it in for a few seconds, and then release it—finally making a correct smoke ring.

"You did it!" Eddie yells.

"I did it!" You echo.

"Great job, beautiful," Steve commends, and you smile angelically at both of them. You give Steve the joint, who takes a drag and hands it to Eddie. "You guys ever shotgunned?" He asks once he's exhaled.

"Obviously," Eddie answers with contempt, but you're confused. "Like a beer?"

"No, smoke," Steve clarifies. You shake your head.

"You don't know how to shotgun, princess? Well, we gotta remedy that," Eddie continues.

Steve explains. "It's when you blow the smoke into another person's mouth."

You're having trouble trying to picture it, and Eddie senses it. "Here, Harrington and I will demonstrate." It feels like a challenge.

One that Steve is up for. "Let's do it, Munson."

They both stand and step in close to each other. They're about the same height—Steve's just the tiniest bit taller—but their mouths are pretty level. Eddie takes a drag, lets it sit, and then lines up his lips with Steve. He exhales the smoke directly into Steve's mouth, who inhales it deeply. They're centimeters from kissing. It makes you squirm a little.

"Nicely done, Harrington," Eddie says, impressed.

Steve does a little bow, making Eddie laugh unexpectedly. You try to hide a smile. Then they both look at you.

"Your turn, beautiful," Steve says.

"Okay." Your voice is a little small.

"You wanna do it?" Steve asks Eddie, but he shakes his head. "All yours, dude."

Steve sits back down and scoots closer to you. He looks deep into your eyes. "Okay, come close." You do so and your body heats up in the proximity. "I'm gonna do it. You just hold those pretty lips open, okay?" You nod, trembling a little. Steve takes a drag, holds it, and then leans in even closer. You can practically feel his mouth on yours. You're almost unprepared for the smoke as it comes billowing towards you, but you inhale as you're supposed to. Steve stays close for a few seconds, the eye contact too intense to break, until you accidentally puff out the smoke into his face. He leans back and coughs. 

"Sorry!" You exclaim.

"It's alright," Steve answers with a smile. "No harm done."

"You wanna try, angel?" You turn to Eddie and nod. Steve hands you the joint as Eddie comes close this time. You inhale, letting the smoke roll around in your mouth, and then lean in and blow it into Eddie's waiting lips. He inhales it greedily and there feels like electricity between you as he doesn't break his gaze. You can't seem to close your mouth. The moment only ends when Eddie turns his head up and releases the smoke into the night sky.

He looks back down at you. "Good girl," he murmurs, and you feel like you could die.

You collapse backwards, exhausted from the tension.

"How was that?" Steve asks.

"Great," you answer dreamily, and he smiles.

"We're honored we could pop your cherry, princess," Eddie adds cheekily.

You shiver—and then keep shivering.

"Oh, beautiful, you're cold," Steve points out. You don't feel cold; you actually feel hot, from being so close to both of them, and seeing them so close to each other. But there are goosebumps on your skin and you can feel your teeth start to chatter. "Let's get you inside."

All three of you stand and move towards the door. Eddie opens it and lets you and Steve step inside before following and shutting it behind him. You already feel better.

Vickie comes rushing up to you. "We gotta go. It's almost my curfew." She takes your hand and pulls.

You turn back to catch glimpses of those beautiful boys. "Thank you!" You call out, hoping they hear you.

chapter four

[airanke]

//SLAMS IN HERE

Hi hello dear friend i have seen your call to do something!

I request Shion, Amita, and Abi!

HOHOHO this is interesting to do for Shion so it will be interesting to look back at that and see what might have changed!

Shion Rejamike

Flower: Originally, the flower I chose was the daisy! Now, though, I think the flower that suits Shion the best is the spider lily. Though they are commonly associated with death, they also represent rebirth and renewal. Given my new plotline for Shion, this suits him much better! Gemstone: Originally was Andradite Garnet; if he was a gemstone now, he would be the emerald. Element: still air/wind, maybe we'll throw in some storm for spice! Shion is still super chatty if you get him talking about the things he loves! Color: still Purple! It's his favorite color, and he favors any armor and weapons that have purple in them. Word: still Hyggelig - “taking pleasure from the presence of gentle, comforting, and soothing things; a feeling of friendship, warmth, peace, and contentment in a comfortable and cozy atmosphere”. Food: Originally I chose a drink called Sweet Poison for him, but I think now he'd be any kind of animal jerky! Weapon: still a double-barreled shotgun! He uses bows more often now, but if HE was a weapon, then yeah. Double-barreled shotgun.

I CANNOT FIND IF I DID ONE FOR AMITA??? OKAY

Amita Dakini

Flower: God if she was a flower, she would be a rose!!! There's just so many meanings that suit but honestly the fact that it is generally accepted to be the flower of love is the biggest reason~ Gemstone: Moonstone! Why would she be anything other than the stone of the moon~ Element: I know what you're thinking. You're thinking I'm gonna say nature - NO!!! Amita as an element is WATER!! I think this suits her super well as a druid (and dragon at that), because they are so malleable as a class and species (choosing forms and visages and such), and water is just as malleable~ Color: the color of the ocean when the moon reflects off it :T Word: Kilig, "the rush or the inexplicable joy one feels after seeing or experiencing something romantic"! Food: FRIED BANANAS!!! Not only are they Amita's favorite food, BUT!! They are sweet and delectable and everything that Amita is (along with having a bit of a gooey centre LMAO) Weapon: a bladed fan to be honest. Elegant, poised, but oh my god will she cut you to ribbons if you are not careful.

And finally, LOML Abiteth <3333

Abiteth Kenka

Flower: Peony, king of the flowers, flower of the fae, don't touch her or the wrath of her family will come down on you with PRECISION. Gemstone: moss agate!! I chose it for her Gem if she was in Steven Universe, and it's called the gardener's stone and IDK it just fits her so well!! She would totally be that! (Also moss agate comes in pink SOOO). Element: okay hers is obvious, if she was an element she would be earth - the very thing that is stalwart and takes great force to move, but also nurtures the growth of all things (animals, buildings, people, plants). Color: Pink. You will not take that from her, and you will not take that from me, she is pink forever and ever and ever. Word: I was gonna pick a super cute word for this, but realistically if Abiteth was a word she would be Monachopsis, "the subtle but persistent feeling of being out of place". Food: hands down she would be candied peony petals!! Sugary sweet and melt in your mouth!! I also debated on her being chocolate covered tarantulas 👀 Weapon: as a weapon, Abiteth would be a whip. I was gonna' say halberd, but that's HER weapon of choice, not what weapon she would be. Also she would be a Trevor Belmont sort of whip, not a regular whip. As if regular whips are not dangerous 😂😂

[miras-false-pr0phet]

I Paired Songs with Every Single Animal Dance in Animal Jam Classic

This doesn't include the patterned versions, like Snowflake Arctic Wolf, Autumn Coyote, Jamaaliday Deer, etc.

BIG ol' list with song links below!

BY THE WAY: Most of these songs are probably explicit! I was focusing mostly on unique takes, beats/BPM, and just general goodness.

Arabian Horse - FΛSHION (Britney Manson)

Arctic Fox - All Men Are Pigs (Studio Killers)

Arctic Wolf - The Night (Voltaire)

Bunny - Fine (Lemon Demon)

Camel - Animal (*repeat repeat)

Cheetah - 8 now (food house)

Clydesdale Horse - Here Comes the Hotstepper (Ini Kamoze)

Cougar - Imma Be (Black Eyed Peas)

Coyote - Crank It Up (Joey Valence & Brae)

Crocodile - Good Vibrations (Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch)

Deer - Hey Ya! (Outkast)

Direwolf - Rock It For Me (Caravan Palace)

Dolphin - Booty Swing (Parov Stelar)

Eagle - Lay All Your Love On Me (ABBA)

Elephant - Rasputin (Boney M)

Falcon - The Outside (Twenty One Pilots)

Fennec Fox - Let's Groove (Earth, Wind & Fire)

Flamingo - Funkytown (Lipps Inc.)

Fox - Break It Down Again (Tears For Fears)

Giraffe - still feel. (half•alive)

Goat - Get It Right (Left Boy)

Great Horned Owl - Say It Right [Violin] (Joel Sunny)

Horse - Pretty Ugly (Tierra Whack)

Hyena - Genghis Khan (Miike Snow)

Kangaroo - High (Sir Sly)

Koala - Call This # Now (The Garden)

Lemur - Monkey Tree (Mother Mother)

Lion - Talking, Sleeping, Waiting (JHAS)

Llama - Dancin [KRONO Remix] (Aaron Smith)

Lynx - Upside Down (Oliver Tree)

Monkey - Cool City (Danny Elfman)

Moose - Americano (Lady Gaga)

Octopus - Tennis Court (Lorde)

Otter {Land} - Reflections (MisterWives)

Otter {Underwater} - Sharks (Imagine Dragons)

Owl - Lost In The Rhythm (Jamie Berry)

Panda - Bulletproof (La Roux)

Penguin {Land} - Deceptacon (Le Tigre)

Penguin {Underwater} - My Type (Saint Motel)

Pig - Null 2 (Graham Kartna)

Polar Bear {Land} - Boreas (The Oh Hellos)

Polar Bear {Underwater} - Death Is A Girl (Mini Mansions)

Raccoon - Drunk-Dazed (ENHYPEN)

Red Panda - Space Ghost Coast To Coast (Glass Animals)

Rhinoceros - Birthday Suit (Cosmo Sheldrake)

Sabertooth - Demigod (KT Tunstall)

Sea Turtle - 90210 [Acoustic Ver.] (blackbear)

Seal {Land} - Shotgun (George Ezra)

Seal {Underwater} - Shotgun (George Ezra)

Shark - Wriggle [Edit] (Cosmo Sheldrake)

Sheep - Droopy Likes Your Face (C418)

Skunk - The Russian Music Box (Soon Hee Newbold)

Sloth - Burn The House Down (AJR)

Snow Leopard - Circular Road (Heathers)

Tiger - American Money (BØRNS)

Toucan - Riptide [FlicFlac Remix] (Vance Joy)

Wolf - Roll with the Wind (Alexander Rybak)

[captainfanoftheceiling]

tag nine people you’d like to get to know better

Tagged by: @arc-randd Hello and Good Evening!

Last song: Am I Dreaming (Because I love the soundtrack from Across the Spider-verse, which is one of my obsessions and we will just leave it here).

Current book: The Annotated Sherlock Holmes by William S. Barring Gould Volume I. Everyone should support their library by buying from their book sales. I also spent a summer reading the Complete Works of Sherlock Holmes, took it to summer camp with me.

My obsessions: Gaming group is currently playing Valheim (far slower than 1 player would like, but with not enough time to tame puppies for the rest of us). Going to say Shotgun Farmers because it has been awhile, but I need to try out the new content. And Dungeons and Dragons: Honor Among Thieves becomes amazing dragon, great comedy, and found family.

going to tag: [This seems very social to me, which can be odd, so feel free to ignore :) I also can't count :) ] @serotonesque @giantrobotcounselor @hero-is-back @hier-und-dar @emeraldinerosefaedragon @girlgregorsamsa

[shotgunrp]

Hello, I’m Shotgun. :)

I am a Lit/Semi-Lit Roleplayer and these are my characters I play!

RP Characters:

Jester

OC

Male, Dalek/Kaled, Married/Dating/Pining over Keera depending on his exact age.

A strange little geneticist who behaves very un-dalek-like for someone who still possesses a dalek brain.

Fandom: Doctor Who

Disclaimers: Canon Divergent Universe (Negligible- Dimension Hopper)

Keera

OC

Woman, Dhaigon (Void Dragon), Human Disguise Occasionally, Bisexual, Married/Dating/Friends with Jester depending on her age.

A real rockstar of a woman, life is a party and she’s here to dance.

Fandom: Doctor Who

Disclaimers: Canon Divergent Universe (Negligible- Dimension Hopper)

Morokei

Canon

Man, Atmoran, Lich, Bisexual, Single with Baggage.

A spoiled young prince of a dragonpriest with more emphasis on the priest than the dragon.

Fandom: Skyrim / The Elder Scrolls

Disclaimers: Canon Divergent Lore & Personal Backstory, Miraak is his (adopted) Dad, ESO doesn’t exist.

[hannahhook7744]

"Family Tree" by Matthew West.

"Watching you"  by Rodney Atkins.

"He didn't have to be" by Brad Paisley.

"Alyssa Lies" by Jason Michael Carroll.

"Numb"  by Linkin Park.

"Somewhere I belong"  by Linkin Park

"Monster" by Imagine Dragons.

"Hard Knock Life" by Annie.

"Maybe" by Annie.

"Home" by Phillip Phillips.

"Home" by Bebe Rexha, Machine Gun Kelly, and X Ambassadors

"Gone Gone Gone" by Phillip Phillips.

"I'm sorry about your parents" by Icon For Hire.

"Children's Work" by Dessa.

"Hey Brother" by Avicii.

"We Are Family" Keke Palmer.

"Mama Said"  by Lukas Graham.

"Seven years old"  by Lukas Graham.

"Everything that isn't me"  by Lukas Graham.

"Stressed out" by Twenty One Pilots.

"I tried to be perfect" by Sum 41.

"He's mine"  by Rodney Atkins.

"Welcome to my life" by Simple Plan.

"I'm just a kid" by Simple Plan.

"Lost Boy" by  Ruth B.

"Never Grow Up" by Taylor Swift.

"Saint Bernard" by  Lincoln.

"Innocence"  by Avril Lavigne.

"Innocent" by Taylor Swift.

"Family Portrait" by P!NK.

"Drama" by AJR.

"Monster" by Beth Crowley.

"Try" by P!NK.

"Oklahoma" by Billy Gilman.

"My Wish" by Rascal Flatts.

"World's smallest violin" by AJR.

"Madhouse" by Little Mix.

"Mean" by Taylor Swift.

"Funhouse" by P!NK.

"Hurry Home" by Jason Michael Carroll.

"Welcome to the family" by Avenged Sevenfold.

"Welcome to the family" by Little Big Town.

"What I've Done" by Linkin Park.

"Demons" by Imagine Dragons.

"Secrets" by OneRepublic.

"Fight Song" by Rachel Platten.

"Fireflies" by  by Adam Young and Owl City.

"Once I was Real" by Bradley Caleb Kane.

"Angel with a shotgun" by The Cab.

"Viva La Vida" by Coldplay.

"How to save a life" by Coldplay.

"Castle on the hill"  by Ed Sheeran.

"See You Again" by Wiz Khalifa.

"I'm still here" by John Rzeznik.

"Roar" by Katy Perry.

"Awake and Alive" by Skillet.

"Shattered" by The Age of Information.

"Heathens"  by Twenty one pilots.

"Grow up to be you"  by Måns Zelmerlöw.

"I'll be good" by Jaymes Young.

"Fix Me" by 10 Years.

"Bohemian Rhapsody" by Queen.

"That's my job" by Conway Twitty.

"Dark Side" by Kelly Clarkson.

"Brave" by Sara Bareilles.

"True Colors" by Anna Kendrick and Justin Timberlake.

"Get out alive" by Three Days Grace.

"Leave out all the rest" by Linkin Park.

"Powerless" by Linkin Park.

"Anything Like Me" by Brad Paisley.

"Find Out Who Your Friends Are" by Tracy Lawrence.

"Hey Ho" by The Lumineers.

"Little Game" by Benny.

"Little Wonders" by Rob Thomas.

"One of these days" by Tim McGraw.

"Polarize" by Twenty one pilots.

"What do you want from me?" by Adam Lambert.

"We are Unbreakable" by Hedley.

"On my own" by Ashes Remain.

"Lemon boy" by Cavetown.

"Devil town" by Cavetown.

"This is home" by Cavetown.

"I promise I'm trying" by Cavetown.

"Pitchfork Kids" by AJR.

"Boulevard of Broken Dreams" by Green Day.

"Bad child" by Tones and I.

"Problem Child" by AC/DC.

"Rockabye" by Clean Bandit.

"Strangers like me" by Phil Collins.

"You had to be there" by Tim McGraw.

"Safe and sound" by Taylor Swift.

"Better place" by Rachel Platten.

"You're on your own, kid" by Taylor Swift.

"This is me trying" by Taylor Swift.

"The Best Day" by Taylor Swift.

"Pity Party" by Melanie Martinez.

"Art of War" by We the Kings.

"Gotta find where I belong" by Meg Donnelly and Milo Manheim.

"Unsteady" by X Ambassadors.

"Beyond blue eyes" by Limp Bizkit.

"Second child, restless child" by The Oh Hellos.

'Broken Home" by 5 Seconds of Summer.

"Boy in the bubble" by Alec Benjamin.

"If I killed someone for you" by Alec Benjamin.

"If we have each other" by Alec Benjamin.

"Human" by Rag'n'Bone Man.

"Human" by Christina Perri.

"The Wind" by Alec Benjamin.

"Freak" by Molly Sandén.

"Weird Kid" by Rosendale.

"Mockingbird" by Eminem.

"When I'm gone" by Eminem.

"Legacy" by Eminem.

"Cleaning out my closet" by Eminem.

"Everything stays" by Adventure Time.

"Written in the stars" by Tinie Tempah.

"Homecoming queen" by Kelsea Ballerini.

"Monsters" by Timeflies.

"No friends" by Cadmium and Rosendale.

"Mad at Disney" by Salem Ilese.

"Cats in the cradle"by Harry Chapin.

"Protector" by City Wolf.

"Who says?" by Selena Gomez.

"All the kids are depressed" by Jeremy Zucker.

"Father of mine" by Everclear.

"You'll be okay" by Bryce Pinkham.

"My world is burning down around me" by Melanie Estrella.

"Little Jack Frost" by Kate Rusby.

"Alien" by Your Favorite Martian.

"Alone" by Alan Walker.

"13 year old me" by P!NK.

"Hey dad" by Good Charlotte.

"Dear Theodosia" by Hamilton.

"Just like you" by Three Days Grace.

"Superheroes" by The Script.

"Count on me" by Bruno Mars.

"Me Against the world" by Simple Plan.

"Piggyback" by Melanie Martinez.

'Out Of A World So Tattered And Torn, You Came To Our House On That Wonderful Morn. And All Of A Sudden This Family Was Born.' Edits;

Descendants Kids:

Cover:

'Out Of A World So Tattered And Torn, You Came To Our House On That Wonderful Morn. And All Of A Sudden This Family Was Born.' is a Disney Descendants & Once Upon A Time crossover fandom fusion fanfiction in which all the descendants kids are adopted by their ouat parent counterparts that @ouatnextgen / @igetthedisneybox and I are writing.

Don't like, don't read.

Rude comments will be deleted.

Here's a link.

[undreaming-fanfiction]

The Adventures of Kas/Eddie and Vecna

Guess who's not working/preparing for exams...we had a wonderful crack brainstorming session with @stevesbipanic and we agreed on a few things we'd like to see as a Stranger Things spinoff...please see our mix of ideas below. Thank you B for the wonderful ridiculousness.

A workplace comedy with Vecna and Kas/Eddie in the Upside Down

Eddie sitting in front of Vecna, nibbling on a demobat snack (the menu in the Upside Down is kinda poor) and complaining about the working conditions while Vecna looks pointedly at the camera, dead inside. A demogorgon sneaks by once or twice and pats Vecna on the back reassuringly.

Eddie: "Okay, you brought me back to life, but as that was a necessary qualification for the job, I just consider it basic training. So don't pull that card on me again. Let's talk benefits and vacation days, insurance maybe?"

Eddie: "Do I get dental? I've got these fangs now, wanna make sure they're pearly white" Vecna: "Do I look like I get dental?" Eddie: "You should."

Eddie being really, really, REALLY bored in the Upside Down. He can't really go back to Hawkins so he settles for annoying Vecna as a hobby and he's good at it.

Eddie would lecture Vecna on the importance of a good moisturizer because hello, have you met Steve Harrington? Eddie: "The squelching sounds absolutely don't mean your skin is moisturized, boss. We have an image to maintain!" Eddie: "Have you seen Steve's skin it's so smooth I wanna kiss his cheeks....'cause it's soft, not for any other reasons"

Eddie sees Vecna the way he is and quickly checks his pants: "Oh good mine is still there"

He'd also be very concerned about keeping his hair. Eddie: "I don't care if I have to drink blood, if I grow wings or whatever, but if you make me go bald I quit." Vecna: "You can't just quit, I made you!" Eddie: "Just watch me walk through that portal and then you can terrorize Hawkins on your own, don't create toxic workplace conditions when you're understaffed!"

Eddie would be very invested in creating a good working environment. He would absolutely start a petition for workplace t-shirts. Doesn't matter if he's the only one who can write in the Upside Down, he'd just dip demobats in ink and slap them on the paper. "It's the closest they can get to a signature".

When it comes to the t-shirt design, he's modest. He shows Vecna his torn up Hellfire shirt: "I'm thinking we keep the devil icon of course, who am I kidding, we can call ourselves the Hellfire club too, it fits." Vecna is too tired to argue with Eddie at this point and shows up to the big fight in a Hellfire t-shirt. There is much confusion.

Vecna finds a new hobby and his own style

Eddie is so bored in the Upside Down (demobats don't talk much) that he starts teaching Vecna Dungeons and Dragons and Vecna suddenly realizes that he can just live in other worlds without destroying the normal one, so days, weeks go by and he doesn't invade Hawkins again. When the usual party barges into the remains of the Creel house, they find Eddie dramatically describing a wounded child rescue from behind an improvised DM screen to a very invested Vecna and when Nancy points her shotgun at him, he shushes her and says "not now, I'm trying to figure out how my alignment would work here!"

Vecna finds out about the Cult of Vecna campaign. Vecna: "You guys named me after this guy? But he's so evilllll, not cool Eddie." Eddie: "Hey man may I remind you your bats ate my bat tattoo?" Vecna: "I brought you back though." Eddie: "My tattoo Henry!" Vecna looks sadly in the distance. Vecna: "I thought...you wouldn't want it. I hated my tattoo. I didn't know they could be a good thing." Eddie: "Oh shit man, I'm sorry. We can cover it up with something cool though. Would you like a D20 or something instead of that number?" This is the night Vecna returns to Hawkins. Except the only reason for that is better lighting for Eddie to work on his tattoo.

Vecna finding out about normal tattoos and coming back covered in tattoos from Eddie: Eddie: "No-one is gonna tell you look like meatloaf with this sleeve!"

Eddie also introducing Vecna to metal/rock fashion. Eddie: "You'd look way more badass in leather, boss!" Vecna wears clothes again after nearly a decade and he's...happy? Who can tell with that face.

Vecna defends Hellfire

Eddie mentions that people in the town thought his beautiful club was a cult. And Vecna is OUTRAGED. He drags the remaining members of Jason's mob to the Upside Down. Vecna: "There was a time I hoped to have you by my side, but now I just want you to watch." And he forces the jocks to sit through a 6 hours long campaign. Eddie is delighted.

[charaznablescanontoyota]

“marn, i missed sgdq 2022! which runs should i watch?”

hello and welcome back to another rec list curated by me and my very subjective opinions. a couple weeks ago was summer games done quick, an annual speedrunning marathon raising money for doctors without borders and also a great way to get into watching speedrunning. a lot of their content is tailored towards being both clearly explained and fun to watch for an audience outside the speedrun community, so you can jump in with basically no knowledge besides “this person is gonna play a game really fast”. here are my personal highlights that i think you should check out!

kirby and the forgotten land: it’s always great to see a game that’s just been released in the past few months hit gdq!! this was my first time watching a forgotten land run and my takeaways were that: a) this game is beautiful and b) the runner was having a GREAT time sharing it with everyone.

spyro the dragon: spyro is one of those early games that has a lot of weird cool movement tech that is still being discovered to this day, and the fact that it shows up at gdq every couple years with some completely new strats to showcase is awesome, imo.

phasmophobia: if you are staring at this link wondering “how the hell do you speedrun the co-op ghost hunting game that relies entirely on randomization and luck”, just trust me and click it. the ghosts did NOT want to cooperate with these runners at ALL.

pokemon emerald randomizer (evolution chaos co-op): i am not usually a person who has the patience to sit for all 3 hours of a pokemon run, and i figured i would just tune into this one for like half an hour while i got some other stuff done, but i was immediately enraptured. it’s a modded randomizer where your pokemon evolves into something random Every Time it levels up, with 4 runners passing the controller around on every evolution. the game was not kind to these runners. it’s one of the funniest things i’ve ever seen at gdq.

donkey kong country: tropical freeze: spikevegeta’s tropical freeze run from gdqx a few years back is still The speedrun i love showing to people, but this one is an INCREDIBLY clean run that is just a joy to watch. spike is also a GREAT runner/commentator who you’ll notice pops up on a lot of gdq commentary couches, he loves to explain not only what’s going on in the game but little anecdotes and fun facts about the community around the game/speedrun.

banjo-tooie: i love duck and hagginator’s banjo-kazooie race from 2019 and have watched it multiple times since it happened and i am happy to see duck back at gdq running banjo-tooie. :) the community around the b-k games seems really nice and if i had to pick a game to get into running myself this might be in my top 5 choices.

mi scusi: you should watch everything from this early morning silly block, i shotgunned basically all the vods for it and loved them all, but this one was the standout. a speedrunner who woke up way too early in the morning plays a spectacularly broken, floppy physics game that was a student project that is about [checks notes] a guy dealing with the mafia, stealing the world cup, and going to space. if you like this one, watch the rest of the silly block, esp turnip boy commits tax evasion and jimmie johnson’s anything with an engine.

stepmania/noitg doubles showcase: what if dance dance revolution was evil and the only way to defeat it was a 45 minute synchronized dance routine

happy’s humble burger farm: stressed runner makes burgers as fast as he can while janky jumpscare horror game tries to give him the worst rng imaginable. i watched this one kind of on a whim because i like teddyras (the runner) a lot and his commentary is like. laugh-out-loud funny. if you have an hour or less to kill and want to watch one of these vods, this is the one. if you like this, you should check out teddyras’s run of gone golfing, a similar janky horror game set at a minigolf course (sort of).

control: this is an all bosses run and something about hearing the extremely sparse 6 am crowd politely golf clap after every boss fight just took me out. also this game has SO many cool out-of-bounds skips and sequence breaks that are SO fun to watch.

mario 64: m64 is basically a staple game at gdq at this point and because it’s basically the grandfather of speedrunning they often try to dress it up with new challenges like the runner being blindfolded, or the game being randomized, or it being a race. this is not that. this is a guy playing regular vanilla mario 64 very nearly on world record pace, pulling off tricks that have never been successfully completed on the gdq stage before, and casually showing the audience completely new movement tech and clips that have been discovered while the commentators lose their fucking minds in the background. also he never died a single time in this run.

mario maker 2 relay race: two teams of 3 highly skilled mario runners go head to head in a blind relay race of 9 extremely fucking difficult mario maker levels. it’s SO cool to watch them figure out routing and strats in real time, and the level designers shoutcasting the race have some really great insight into the design of the levels themselves.

[kerra-and-company]

Kerra's Playlist: Analysis

Hello folks! Welcome to something I put probably way too much thought into—aka me talking about the playlist I made for Kerra 😊

(also, tagging @i-mybrunettelady and @king-there0f, since you guys said you were specifically interested in seeing this <3)

Warnings for content below: assorted spoilers for the entire GW2 storyline, suicidal thoughts, grief

So, some things about Kerra's playlist that give me Emotions when I listen to it:

The first song on Kerra’s playlist is instrumental, and it’s called Valiant—Kerra’s first-ever title, and one that she has claim to as soon as she awakens.

Broken Heart of Gold is the seventh song. It’s early in this playlist and early in Kerra’s life; she’s about a month and a half old here at most. And the chorus is this:

Sometimes I just wanna quit Tell my life I'm done with it When it feels too painful Sometimes I just wanna say I love myself but not today When it feels too painful I smash my broken heart of gold

Kerra is grieving and she is angry. She had to kill Tiachren. It was her fault and it wasn’t; she could have made another choice but she wouldn’t have; it’s a death that teaches her that guided destinies don’t come casualty-free. This song is mostly about the grief and self-hatred that comes out of this incident, but she’s angry at others as well, and a big part of that anger is directed at the Nightmare Court. When Faolain visits Briarthorn, Kerra (there undercover at the time, working with Alarin) seriously considers killing her, both out of a generalized anger towards the Court and a very personal anger towards Faolain with her (at this point still limited) knowledge of what Faolain did to Caithe.

What I’m Here For (number 10) is meant to be a sweet song but has always been kinda bittersweet for me, and that translates to the role it has in Kerra’s playlist. She, sincerely and truly at this point, thinks her value is in what she can do for other people. (Also, based on where it’s located on the playlist, it’s technically a little before she joins the Order of Whispers, but the line “I’ll be the brightest shadow you’ve ever had” is very tied to her and the Order.)

Angel With A Shotgun is...just a very Kerra song. The whole thing fits her, to be honest, but especially this:

They say before you start a war You better know what you're fighting for Well baby, you are all that I adore If love is what you need, a soldier I will be

For Kerra, this isn't meant to be interpreted in an explicitly romantic sense. You could read it as platonic love/romantic love/just how much she cares about the world in general, and she could be talking about/to many different people. There's also something to be said about this bit:

If love's a fight, then I shall die With my heart on a trigger

Considering that she does, in fact, during PoF.

No One Stands Alone is Kerra's becoming-the-Commander song (think end of level 60 PS and retaking Claw Island):

No one's falling No one will be forgotten No one's going on their own

We find light Through the smoke No one stands alone

Through the fire We find hope No one stands alone

It's good and also very painful--"no one else is dying if I can help it, I will never forget those we lost, I'll stand beside you even if no one else will"--but it's also very much her acknowledging that she's a leader. Where she goes, people will follow, and that's important even if it's hard. And there's the bridge, which is also worth noting:

I won’t let you leave we just started My heart’s on my sleeve, it’s unguarded They might come for me a new target They need a new target My heart is unguarded

Both another instance of her being self-sacrificing and one of her saying that she's going to keep loving anyways, regardless of whether it hurts her or not.

Also, to add one more point--it's an echo of something Tybalt says during the level 40 PS: "When you stand with the Order of Whispers, you never stand alone."

May I is (in this playlist) meant to be Kerra talking to the fledgling Dragon's Watch during LWS1:

May I hold you As you fall to sleep When the world is closing in And you can't breathe May I love you May I be your shield When no one can be found May I lay you down

"Can I protect you, can I love you, are you happy to have me here and as your friend? Because I'm really happy to be yours, and I want to keep this thing we've built, if I can."

Ready or Not is Kerra and Scarlet going back and forth during Clockwork Chaos:

You thought nothing could surprise you You thought you'd seen everything But you never saw me coming All eyes on me Ready or not

Some of the lines are more Kerra, and some of them are more Scarlet, but you could take the song as coming from either one of them alone and it'd be equally valid.

Breathe is Kerra's Tower of Nightmares song--hallucinations, doubt, just have to get through this:

I know right now you're not strong enough But breathe

Strange Sight is technically from one of the Tinkerbell movies, I think? But I first heard it entirely divorced from that context, so it's not particularly relevant xD As far as the new context I'm giving it, this is Kerra's catching-romantic-feelings song:

You're reckless and distant But I'll be persistent I will understand you Strange How I'm drawn to the danger I'll reach out my hand to you

You are a strange sight Some new kind of wonder

There's a light that you shine There's a love, I see it in your eyes

It's not a perfect match in all respects, but those few segments really hit home. Kerra's friendship (and eventual romantic relationship) with Nisha and Canach is based on a) seeing things she understands in both of them, and notably somewhat darker things (Nisha's grief, Canach's anger), and b) being willing to reach out and connect because she thought they were worth connecting to. And they reached back to her, too.

Echo is Kerra right after the Shadow of the Dragon attacks the Summit--she knows her Wyld Hunt now, but so many other things have been thrown into question, and she feels incredibly off-kilter and afraid in a way she's really never been before:

I can't get a grip, but I can't let go There wasn't anything to hold onto, though

The trembling fear Is more than I can take When I'm up against The echo in the mirror

Brittle, on the other hand, is Kerra after she learns the truth about the origin of sylvari, thanks to both the memory seeds and Nisha. It's anger at her mother and Caithe, anger at her situation, anger at herself for not being stronger, and anger at Mordremoth (and those distrustful of sylvari) as we bleed over from the end of LWS2 into HoT and the Pact fleet's destruction. I think the segment of this song that best fits Kerra here is this:

If I get defensive Don't say I'm oversensitive Maybe I have a tendency to snap on people telling me "You fit inside this box we built, we know you better than yourself" They're lying, they're lying, they're lying

Dear Shadow comes at the end of HoT, but it's reflective of Kerra and her Wyld Hunt and her emotions surrounding it since she awakened. She's talking to her Hunt, the voice in the back of her mind telling her to kill the dragon, like it's an entity all its own:

The first day that we met I saw you out of the corner Of my eye, I was 5 You're still the thumb that I'm under

Oh, I hid you away Pushing you down You left me caught between a light and a dark place

On the wall I was 10, you were more than a feeling By my side, unwanted The sun would see you come creeping Made of fear I was strong There's no shame to have you here Where you belong

I've been lonely Keeping you back there behind me Got this swollen feeling We could make amends I see it's only me needing You back there behind me In my soul I feel like Maybe we'll be friends But you're holding me back Yeah, you're holding me back And I just want to run

In order of segment, it's referencing: sapling times, post-Zhaitan, LWS2, the final battle with Mordremoth (where the Hunt is finally completed). This is maybe one of my favorite songs on this whole playlist.

Brother gives me emotions about Kerra and Trahearne, and them supporting each other as they build the Pact, and the huge risk that she takes to save him at the end of HoT--she's the one to bring him home:

Ramblers in the wilderness We can't find what we need We get a little restless from the searching Get a little worn down in between Like a bull chasing the matador Is the man left to his own schemes Everybody needs someone beside 'em Shining like a lighthouse from the sea

Brother, let me be your shelter Never leave you all alone I can be the one you call When you're low Brother, let me be your fortress When the night winds are driving on Be the one to light the way Bring you home

Now You Believe In You is instrumental, but the title alone says why it's important. Kerra post!HoT is free from her Wyld Hunt. She still carries losses on her shoulders and always will, but she truly believes in her capability going forward and in herself, now, in a way that was thrown a little off course for a while during LWS2. It's also that feeling that gives her the last push she needs to confess to Canach and Nisha.

And Rather Be is her confession song:

If you gave me a chance, I would take it It's a shot in the dark, but I'll make it Know with all of your heart, you can't shame me When I am with you, there's no place I'd rather be

"I want to be with you, if you want that too. I choose this, I choose you. Both of you are so absolutely worth the love I have for you."

Also worth noting a couple more lines:

It's easy being with you Sacred simplicity

In a lot of ways, this isn't actually that true. Kerra's the Commander, Nisha takes on the Marshal position a few months after this point, Canach's billet is still held by Anise, and they have literally no idea what form the world is going to take going forward. So it's not so much the situation that's simple, but the being-with-them, and the choice itself. Of course she'd choose them.

We're different and the same

Always been important, always will, even if it's a statement that'd be true about any set of strangers you met on the street.

As long as I am with you My heart continues to beat

And last but not least, I continue to be mean about seeing foreshadowing here--they're not with her when she fights Balthazar.

Never Look Away is one of my favorite songs for the three of them (Nisha/Kerra/Canach), in part because of its tendency to list things out in threes. (Also because there's literally the line "We're gonna photosynthesize and drink up the sunrise" in it, which is excellent.) I bolded a couple bits to highlight the triplets, but I wanted to show you all of these lyrics because they fit really really well:

So do they ever shut up because you said so or Do you overthink 'em all Somebody ought to corrupt you on the dance floor And take you home Show you all your daemons and desires and dark sides All of your colonies and continental divides

Let me uncover the silver in your dark hair The weight of your bones I want to witness the beauty of your repair The shape you've grown For you are made of nebulas and novas and night sky You're made of memories you bury or live by

So if you're out there in the cold I'll cover you in moonlight If you're a stranger to your soul I'll bring you to your birthright I want the storm inside you awoken now I want your warm bright eyes To never look away

Sunlight (yes, the Hozier one) is a song that could really go in a lot of places on this playlist--it's very Kerra, but not a specific time of Kerra doing things. For the purposes of the playlist timeline, though, it's during LWS3. All the lyrics fit in some way, but to avoid quoting all of them, I'll just give you this:

All the tales the same Told before and told again A soul that's born in cold and rain Knows sunlight, sunlight, sunlight And at last can grant a name To a buried and a burning flame As love and its decisive pain Oh, my sunlight, sunlight, sunlight

Dirt Around The Tree is a song that's so Kerra (in terms of both her entire timeline and specifically right after she comes back from being dead in PoF) that my brain visualized an entire animatic for it that I'm not able to draw--I won't write about it here, but I am absolutely going to reblog that post so you can see. It's also in my fics tag if anyone's reading this and decides they want to go find it :)

Paper Dragon gives me Kerra vibes post-PoF specifically, but it's also just a good song for Kerra looking into the faces of Elder Dragons and a god and saying, "Still standing." For a few segments:

Well, you try to stamp me out But I'll come to life You try to burn me up But I'll never die

Sticky tape me, re-arrange me, throw me out, start again Re-use me, confuse me, shred me up-up into little pieces You say I make no sense

Oh, you don't own me I don't think you're fair Try to destroy me I don't care

All I Know So Far is one of my favorite songs for Kerra and her kids (Aurene, Rhi, Tev and Ia). It's also specifically a parenting song for Kerra and her partners, if you choose to listen to it for the three of them rather than just for her:

I wish someone would have told me that this life is ours to choose No one's handing you the keys or a book with all the rules The little that I know I'll tell to you When they dress you up in lies and you're left naked with the truth

This verse in particular (above) is very Kerra, but the chorus that it segues into (below) has elements of her and Nisha and Canach:

You throw your head back, and you spit in the wind Let the walls crack, 'cause it lets the light in Let 'em drag you through hell They can't tell you to change who you are That's all I know so far And when the storm's out, you run in the rain Put your sword down, dive right into the pain Stay unfiltered and loud, you'll be proud of that skin full of scars That's all I know so far

And the rest of the song is like that, too; I'm just not going to put all of it here for the sake of both space and my brain xD :)

Run is another one I wrote an animatic "script" for--will reblog that shortly, but please check out my fics tag and you'll find it there!

And last but not least for individual songs, I have to mention Hell or High Water because it's a very Kerra-during-EoD song, struggling against both the Void and Ankka (as well as all the other complications going on). It's also related to water, which, considering Soo-Won, is very fitting:

We are running out of time Meet me at the water line No one here is safe We are running out of time Don't forget your promises It's only fear inside your head We won't be replaced No one here is safe

When the river's running red And we begin to falter We'll hang on to the edge Come hell or high water

There's a few song parallels in here also--three of note are:

1) Weight of the World (during the Zhaitan campaign/level 80 PS) and Featherweight (when Kerra steps down as Commander after EoD), and

2) Go for Gold (the first instance where a song has "champion" in the lyrics, which for Kerra is both being a champion for herself and her new friends during LWS1) and Champions ("champions aren't born, they're built"--after returning from the Domain of the Lost).

3) Angel With a Shotgun comes back later, in a sped-up version, during the early part of EoD--Kerra is willing to sacrifice herself to save Rhi and Gorrik when they're all crashing into the shores of Cantha, and it's why she's as injured as she is (and why she needs almost a month to recover).

And...I shall stop there! But if you actually read this far, thanks so much for being interested, and I hope you had a good time. My brain has so many Kerra thoughts in it at all times and a bunch of those manifest in her playlist, so it was really nice to write this down.

:) <3

[spacedykez]

hello and welcome to lifesteal/branzypierce fic ideas round 3 (here’s the first two) brought to you by excessive brainrot & looping the same song for literally ten hours straight! oh and also procrastination of things i need to write! with that said, here you are.

Lyrics For Inspiration: every single thing around us is for show and tell don’t it feel like hell I Wanna Live, Not Just Survive the devil’s after both of us make a mercy out of me when the war starts in my heart they say before you start a war you better know what you’re fighting for if love is what you need a soldier i will be don’t you know you’re (my) everything baby you are all that i adore don’t wanna have to bury you (but nothing seems to get through your skull) as you march towards your death breathing your last breath (how did i let you) sink your fangs so deep thought we had a future (but we ain’t got a chance in hell) show me how to lie (you’re getting better all the time) a thousand lies and a good disguise see ‘em running for their lives welcome to the freak show smoke and mirrors, never trust what you see where nothing’s as it seems (they toss you up and smash you down to smithereens) so this is wonderland, where all your dreams come true Quotes: “If you don’t leave now, I will detonate the entire pyramid. You think I’m joking? I’m not. This right here? Is the lever that will do it all.” - Branzy this clip oh my gosh (evil branzy content) “he’s adorable, but vicious” -Branzy (you could make this about Branzy though) this chiefzy quote

Songs, For Inspiration: Angel With A Shotgun (the cab) Carousel (NEONI) Wonderland (NEONI) masochism tango (tom lehrer) Enjoy The Ride (krewella) Tall Remix - End Music Disk Concept is so Branzy’s theme. Trust me. It’s him welcome to the trading hall (branzy) curses - crane wives how far we’ve come (matchbox twenty) - see look they’re not all romance songs obsession (ok go) burn the house down (AJR)

NEW! AU Ideas (mostly courtesy of discord): -httyd (how to train your dragon) au -toh (owl house) au solely because collector branzy i’m just right. -traffic life au (clownzy/treebark or echo husbands divorce quartet. i need a plot idea because i want to write this) -good old pirate au like come on don’t you wanna write sirens and epic ship (as in the pirate ships lol) battles come onnnn -catboy 4 catboy clownzy. either just humanoids or they can shapeshift into cats. -au where branzy is an ender dragon -superhero au. just more superhero aus. SPECIAL! Chat Screenshots

[444tsumu]

HAPPY 100 MARS!!!/&/&: AHHH! okay so i’d love a tier three if you didn’t mind! i wanted to know which 3 characters would smoke ouid and what you think smoking with them would be like? ily tysm!

▭ WHICH CHARACTERS SMOKE WEED?

includes matsukawa, hanamaki, suna

warnings drug use, explicit content, doing things under the influence, implied sexual content, slight nsfw.

authors note lol ik some people don’t like the whole “w*ed” and dr*g use hc but it’s all fiction and based on my own personal opinion (: i don’t mean to offend anyone lol i smoke too <3

This is a long one, beware <3 also it’s also my dream blunt rotation LMAO

                          𖥻 MATSUKAWA, ISSEI !

definitely the philosophical stoner

always has a question or an answer

depends on how much he’s smoked though

eyes get really red and he looks really hot

prefers backwoods over regular papers

always smoked regular papers though bc woods are bad for you (:

does that thing where they lick the paper and look at you at the same time

the hottest man smoking ever god please

always makes sure to have you sitting on his left so that he passes it to you first

loves smoking people out

doesn’t really care if you put in money or not

if issei is around, everyone is getting high

smokes makki’s unemployed ass out like everyday lmao

loves to hotbox

lights you up for the first time and tries to get you into another galaxy

“if you’re gonna get high, at least do it right”

definitely funny as fuck when he’s high

always definitely ready to fuck

very touchy when he’s high

will hold on to you for a long time and forget he’s doing it

but if you make him let go he genuinely feels the skin contact nearly rip off

calm down mattsun your possessiveness is showing

tries to explain all the different types to you but forgets mid sentence

literally cannot formulate a single structured thought

definitely leans in to make out with you more than once

loves shotgunning with you

already lazy but when he’s zooted he’s UNBEARABLE

he really does wanna fuck but ends up smoking too much with you because you played chicago and forgot

doesn’t really get hungry for food but munchies?

ate all of the snacks

has no remorse for his actions either

stares into the deep nothing for like 10 minutes

just to snap out of it and look around suspiciously

“do you guys hear that….?”

“…..no?”

“………..the paint is screaming at me?”

ok buddy don’t ruin this for everyone else

knows how to french & ghost inhale

has argued with makki many times over the earth being flat

doesn’t really think it’s flat

ends up believing it is after makki told him the world was actually dome shaped

has a grinder shaped like a dragon ball

not a peer pressuring kinda guy but thinks everyone should get high at least once

definitely gets iwa and oikawa to try

loves getting oikawa high cause he thinks the guy is fucking hilarious

laughs at everything

just a great guy, especially when he starts smoking

falls into a weed coma and doesn’t wake up for like 3 days though

treats it like it’s a regular hangover

definitely falls asleep with his entire body on top of you and no remorse for the weight

says “i’m fried” and isn’t embarrassed about it for whatever reason

he’s hot so no one judges him

                      𖥻 HANAMAKI, TAKAHIRO !

definitely a comedian when he’s high

always the funniest guy in the room

when him and mattsun are together though?

undefeated

him and issei both smoked for the first time together

after that though?

they became unstoppable

don’t get me started with after volleyball season ended

prefers bongs because he thinks he looks cooler lmao

everyone assumes makki is high but they don’t know he actually gets high

offers to smoke you out cause you’re hot lmao

makes fun of you when you cough

even though he still coughs

hates hotboxing because he can’t handle it

but refuses to pussy out so he’s always the first one to agree

in his own words

“my mother didn’t raise no bitch”

makki please

ideal smoking partner

is one of those people that fuck the passing rotation up because he refuses to pass it to anyone but you

secretly does it because he doesn’t want anyone else’s lips touching yours

prefers to smoke with just his close friends but doesn’t mind a session

doesn’t like shotgunning cause he starts thinking his breath smells bad

gives in anyways because he doesn’t want you doing it with anyone else

loves when you put your legs on him

the pressure gives him chills

makes jokes 24/7 because he likes hearing you laugh

can’t french inhale but mattsun taught him how to ghost inhale and he hasn’t stopped since

takes videos of himself cause he thinks he looks cool

realizes he looks like a fucking idiot but fuck it we ball

falls into a weed coma with his head on your lap and his phone unlocked and still on

does that thing where he lights it up with it in his mouth and looks really fucking hot while doing so

has a breaking bad rick & morty rolling tray and is really proud of it

gets really into music when he’s high

will sing along to all the songs while he’s packing the bong

as i repeat

looks hot while doing so

definitely a hungry high

orders food before you even get to ask

“makki, want some snacks?”

“oh nah it’s cool, i already ordered mcdonald’s”

“????? we just finished smoking????”

prefers smoking over drinking but will do both when he wants to go big or go home

eyes get really low

talks kinda slow but really deep and it’s fucking hot

laughs by throwing his head back and it’s really cute

gets cold when he’s high

it doesn’t matter the season

he gets fucking cold and it makes no sense

so he’ll need your body heat to warm himself up (;

                            𖥻 SUNA, RINTAROU !

a confused high

no doubt about it

this man never knows what the fuck is going on

ik everyone complains about the stoner!suna hc

but i think it’s fucking hot lmao

always has like 2 blunts rolled and on him at all times

is one of those people that will use any excuse to do it

“……(sighs) i’m gonna go take a smoke break.”

“suna we just got here??”

“exactly”

likes joints and edibles the best

not much of a hungry high or munchie high

but he hyperfixates on a certain food and will eat it until there is nothing left

ate an entire pack of gum in one sitting before

definitely watches cartoons the minute he starts to feel the buzz

rarely talks unless to pass it to you or make a single joke that has you about to pee yourself

he doesn’t say much but when he does?

the man leaves an impact

hates smoking with other people

doesn’t like when they fuck his blunt/joint up

hates smoking joints rolled by other people unless he watches them do it

always complains when you ask to smoke with him but secretly loves it

shotguns with you and acts like nothing just happened

hello sir how dare you make me fall inlove like that

forgets everything so don’t try to say anything important to him

zones out because he’s too busy imagining fucking

but then forgets about fucking and starts thinking about what’s on the tv

can’t hold a conversation but will go in-depth as to why spongebob squarepants was more than just a sponge

“no you need to listen to me, patrick star is much more than just his best friend—”

“….rin what the fuck are you talking about?”

“you’re asking me like i know? pass the blunt.”

definitely got into smoking in high school but didn’t actually do it like that until college

lies on his drug tests lmao

smokes after every win as a celebration and smokes after ever loss as a reliever

lmao seek help sir

definitely tries to get you to take your shirt off when he’s in the moment

swears it’s because he’s doing you a favor but really just loves how you look in his clothes when he’s high

doesn’t really know when to stop because he’s never greened out before

all his supplies is a simple shade of black

he’s a simple man

can do all the smoke tricks

but won’t do it in front of anyone cause he hates when people point it out

likes hotboxing because it gets him higher faster

is actually friends with the guy he gets weed from lmao

his perfect date with you was that one time you guys stood home and did nothing but smoke and watch family guy

tears up every time he thinks about it

has a picture of himself with two blunts in his mouth and his eyes really red and it’s really fucking hot

giggles even though he tries not to

uses pens when he can’t physically have weed on him

doesn’t really like it because the pen high makes him knock out after a few pulls

once rin falls into a weed coma???

don’t even think about trying to contact him cause that man might as well be dead

doesn’t wake up to save his own damn life

you can smack him and the most he’d do is probably groan and turn his head lmao

[mewmewchann]

Beta AU incorrect quotes but I do them

@kagazuly Hello there Idk I thought it’d be fun to do some incorrect quotes of my own uwu

(all of these will contain spoilers, so make sure you’re caught up ...Also some of these might have been done already Idk I didn’t check)

~~

Kirumi: Okay guys, let’s go. Rantaro: Shotgun! Shuichi: But you had it on the way here- WHOA! Rantaro, holding a shotgun: No, I found a shotgun! Rantaro: And I want the front seat. :) *cocks it* (source: Thomas Sanders)

Miu: If your friend jumped off a cliff, would you follow them? Rantaro: I’m the friend that jumps off the cliff. Miu: Okay. [beat] Miu: Wait- (source: Tumblr post)

Rantaro: But we’ll have to find a way to distract the mastermind...Are any of you good at jumping up and down and making annoying noises? Himiko: My time has come. (source: Gravity Falls)

Ryoma: You know, the indigenous species here can be really aggressive, so it’s important to take all necessary precautions when approaching. Ryoma: *beeps airhorn at a duck* GET FUCKED (source: Vine)

Monokuma: How do you plead? Kaito: *looks at Shuichi* Shuichi, whispering: Not guilty...! Kaito: Hot milky? Kirumi: FOR FUCK'S SAKE, JUST LOCK HIM UP ALREADY (source: Tumblr post)

Miu: I’m having another baby. Ouma: Oh! Congratulatio- Miu, slamming down adoption papers: It’s you. Sign here. (source: unknown)

Kaede: When you’re done with your tea, I’ll look at the leaves and tell you your fortune. Himiko, setting her cup down: Alright, I’m done. Read mine. Kaede: Okay, I see a ladder...Which can mean either a promotion or a violent death. Himiko: ...I'm a student, I can't get promoted. Kaede: Mhm. Mhm. Who’s next? (source: Friends)

Ouma: I wrote Himiko a note telling her how I feel. Miu: That’s progress! Ouma: I tore it up and flushed it. Miu: Eeehhhh... Ouma: It’s still progress! (source: Be More Chill)

Kaede: Please? For me? Maki: Don’t do that. Kaede: What? Maki: You think every time you say “Please? For me?” I’ll do whatever you want. Well not this time. Kaede: Please? For me? Maki: Maki: Okay. (source: Icarly)

Shuichi: We found a death note on Tsumugi’s body. “Fear is the mind killer, but so am I.” Rantaro: Huh. Sounds like something Kiyo would say. [pause] Rantaro: ...WAIT, THAT IS SOMETHING KIYO WOULD SAY! Korekiyo: Fuck. Rantaro: KIYO’S THE FUCKING KILLER!!! (source: ChilledChaos)

Shuichi: I understand now...If it weren’t for the mastermind, you wouldn’t be-! Rantaro: Dying? No. Shuichi: ...I was gonna say “evil”. Rantaro: Oh, no. I’d definitely still be evil. If this situation was reversed, this conversation would never have happened. Rantaro: You’d be dead, and I’d be laughing. Rantaro: Hahaha- oh, it hurts to laugh... (source: Dragon Ball Z Abridged)

Tatsuya: Hey, how’s it going? Kiibo: Pretty good. Kiibo: Now you might have thought there were two different people talking, when actually... Tatsuya: It was me again. Movie magic! (source: Prozd)

Kirumi: Describe what the mastermind looks like! Shuichi: They’re tall. Kirumi: Go on? Shuichi: They wear heels. Kirumi: Do they look like a bitch? Shuichi: ...What-? Kirumi: DO THEY. LOOK LIKE. A BITCH!? (source: Pulp Fiction)

Tatsuya: I can’t wait to get a job at Starbucks so I can spell people’s names wrong. Then they won’t be able to Instagram their cups. Miu: Are you Satan? Kirumi: Are you God? Ouma: Are we humans? Shuichi: Is this the real life? Rantaro: Or is this some sick, twisted fantasy? Kaito: No, this is Patrick. (source: Tumblr post)

Ryoma: Rantaro has done time. Shuichi: What for? Ryoma: No one knows for sure. He changes the story every time you ask him. Rantaro: I defrauded a major corporation. Rantaro: I robbed the second-largest bank in Japan using only a ballpoint pen. Rantaro: I created a hole in the ozone over Sapporo. Rantaro: I killed a man. With this thumb. (source: Ratatouille)

Korekiyo: Tsumugi, if you kill me, everyone will know you were the murderer. Tsumugi: If I die, Kiyo has a small dick. Korekiyo: HOW DARE YOU-! (source: Achievement Hunter)

Rantaro: Ryoma, I have a secret...You can’t tell anyone... Shuichi, listening in on them through the door: Oh shit. *leans in closer* Ryoma: What is it, Rantaro? Rantaro: It’s about our memories... Shuichi: ...! *leans in even closer* Rantaro: It’s...It’s... Rantaro: SOMETHING I’M NOT GONNA SAY ‘TIL NEXT CHAPTER, BITCH! Shuichi: GOD DAMMIT- (source: Prozd)

~~

Idk I thought this would be fun

[thatboomerkid]

CLEARANCE LEVEL 5 REQUIRED: IMMEDIATE POST-█████ (CLASS-███ EVENT) INTERVIEW OF Dr. [REDACTED] by [DATA EXPUNGED] CONDUCTED █ █████ ON █/██/██ WITH ████ BANANA-██D█ █████09: “DICK MEATSWEATS COLLECTIVE”

Dr. [REDACTED]: (is violently hauled into a cramped, windowless interrogation-cell with a bag over his head, handcuffed; is shoved unceremoniously into a metal chair and then immediately handcuffed an additional seven times)

(low, dull-yellow lighting flickers over a single long, scarred, heavily-reinforced steel table bolted to the cement floor; also, ██ is actively ████ SCP-███ █ of █████ with ██ and ███ ham-beast ████)

[DATA EXPUNGED] █ ████ (hereafter referr to as “Interviewer”) ██ and █ with a hot ██ and ███ twin spatula ████ Megaman ████ (see ██ ███ ███thick dong█)

Interviewer: (gestures dismissively at Dr. [REDACTED], addressing security officer) Please, remove that. It ... won’t be necessary.

Security: (raises quizzical eyebrow)

Interviewer: (gestures again, making the international sign for “pull the bag off his head”)

Security: (raises other eyebrow, even more quizzically)

Interviewer: (frowns, narrows eyes)

Security: (makes international sign for “do you mean ‘pull his head off his torso’?”)

Interviewer: THE BAG. TAKE THE FUCKING BAG OFF HIS HEAD.

Security: Oh! Okay, yeah, sure, that makes WAY more sense. (pulls bag off of Dr. [REDACTED]’s head) Sorry about that.

Dr. [REDACTED]: (blinks several times)

Interviewer: Good morning, Dr. [REDACTED].

Dr. [REDACTED]: (blinking) Oh. Fuck.

Interviewer: You know, I get that a lot? So, Dr. [REDACTED], could you — perhaps — please begin by telling me just a little bit about what it is you do here at the Foundation?

Dr. [REDACTED]: Am ... am I in trouble?

Interviewer:

Security:

Interviewer & Security: (suddenly laugh out loud)

Interviewer & Security: (continue laughing)

Dr. [REDACTED]: (frowns)

Interviewer & Security: (still laughing)

Interviewer & Security: (laughing hard enough to shed actual tears)

Interviewer & Security: (audible wheezing)

Dr. [REDACTED]: (pretty clearly offended)

Interviewer & Security: (slowly composing themselves)

Dr. [REDACTED]: uhh ... the fuck?

Interviewer: (wiping away tears) Oh, sweet hopping pogo-Jesus. That was goddamn hilarious. Yeah, no oh my god no, you’re not in trouble.

Security: Yeah, I would have just shot you.

Interviewer: Yeah. Definitely.

Dr. [REDACTED]: (nods at random dead guy seated in the chair next to him) Ah. So is that what happened to this guy?

Other Researcher: (also seated next to Dr. [REDACTED], also handcuffed, still with a bag over his head) Yeah, I was wondering the same thing.

Interviewer: (narrows eyes) No, that was due to a ... “miscommunication”.

Security: YOU GAVE ME THE NOD.

Interviewer: WHAT NOD!?

Security: THE NOD! THE NOD THAT MEANS TO SHOOT THE GUY IN THE HEAD! THE FUCKING ... THE NOD!

Interviewer: WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU ON ABOUT? WHAT “NOD”!?

Security: (shoots Other Researcher in the head)

All:

Interviewer: THE FUCK WAS THAT!?

Security: YOU JUST GAVE ME THE NOD! AGAIN! THE SAME FUCKING NOD!

Interviewer: jesus goddamn christ put your fucking firearm away

Security:

Security: okay, but it’s not my fault you keep giving me the murder-nod

Interviewer: I’M SORRY WHAT WAS THAT?

Security: Ah! Sorry, sorry, nothing, [DATA EXPUNGED]. My apologies.

Interviewer: That’s what I goddamn thought.

Dr. [REDACTED]: uhh

Interviewer: Ah. Yes. So.

Dr. [REDACTED]: ... so?

Interviewer:

Dr. [REDACTED]:

Interviewer: I am so sorry, this is really embarrassing. I have COMPLETELY lost my train of thought. Where were we?

Security: Oh! You were just asking Dr. [REDACTED] here if he could tell you a little bit about what he does at the Foundation.

Interviewer: SHUT THE FUCK UP AND STOP MURDERING STAFF-MEMBERS, ASSHOLE. I’M NOT FUCKING TALKING TO YOU.

Security:

Security: don’t have to be a dick about it

Interviewer: I’M SORRY, AGAIN, WHAT WAS THAT? YOU’RE TOTES PSYCHED ABOUT GETTING YOUR CHAPPED ASS BUSTED DOWN TO D-CLASS PERSONNEL?

Security: No, [DATA EXPUNGED]. No, I am not totes psyched about that.

Interviewer: Yeah. Keep it up, just see what happens.

Dr. [REDACTED]: um

Interviewer: Oh! Shit, yeah. So, Dr. [REDACTED], could you begin by telling me a little bit about what you do here at the Foundation?

Dr. [REDACTED]: Ah, yes! Well, I’m an [EXPUNGED], an unlicensed [ALSO EXPUNGED] and [REDACTED] practitioner, as well as an [EXPUNGED], a [SUPER-EXPUNGED], two [JESUS FUCK, SO EXPUNGED], a psychopharmacologist with a background in [DOULE EXPUNGED], anomalous and/or cognitohazardous pornography and [EXTRA HYPER-TIGER-DRAGON EDITION EXPUNGED]. Crikey, my name is ’Stralian Dan! Dingos, boomerangs, koalas, wallabies! FOSTERS! VEGEMITE! PAUL HOGAN! YAHOO SERIOUS FILM FESTIVAL! (said with German accent) {O5–1 APPROVED thumbs up}

Interviewer:

Interviewer: ... and we hired you WHY?

Dr. [Redacted]: Well, for a lot—

(knock at the door)

Interviewer: OH FOR FUCK’S SAKE. HELLO? WHAT THE SHIT DO YOU WANT?

(door cracks open just a smidge)

Interdepartmental Liaison: (pokes head in) Hey, everybody! Just popping in real quicksies to ask if everyone has their raffle tickets for th—

Security: (shoots Interdepartmental Liaison in the head)

Interviewer:

Interviewer: are you goddam kidding m—

Security: UH ARE YOU GODDAMN KIDDING *ME*!? If you don’t want me to shoot people in the head, STOP GIVING ME THE ‘SHOOT THIS GUY IN THE HEAD’ NOD.

Interviewer: for the love of hot greasy fuck THERE IS NO ‘SHOOT THIS GUY IN THE HEAD’ NOD and if there was I WOULDN’T BE FUCKING GIVING TO YOU.

Security: okay well that’s not what I was told

Interviewer: GIVE ME YOUR FIREARM YOU MURDER-HAPPY NUTBAG FUCKSTICK

Security: pfft

Interviewer: (literally audible scowling)

Security: okay well fine but I just want to be clear, for the record or whatever, that I feel like I barely murder ANYBODY around here

Interviewer: THE GUN, ASS-MUNCH.

Security: (hands over firearm, rolling eyes)

(knock at the door)

(some Guy From Accounting pops head in door)

Guy From Accounting: Hey, so real quick? We’re supposed to have this room—

Security: (shoots Guy From Accounting in the head)

Interviewer: HOW IN THE HOLY HOPPING JESUS FUCK

Security: Backup gun.

Interviewer: “BACKUP GUN”?

Security: Yeah, I’ve got like two dozen guns on me. Why? Did you think I handed you my only gun?

Interviewer: YES.

Security: okay, well that seems like YOUR goof-up

Interviewer: PUT ALL OF YOUR GUNS ON THE FLOOR

Security:

Dr. [REDACTED]:

Security: okay well this is gonna take a while

Dr. [REDACTED]: (slowly raises hand)

Interviewer: WHAT

Dr. [REDACTED]: um, I’d like to talk a little about what i do here at the Foundation? if that’s okay?

Interviewer: Oh sweet Jesus H. Tit-Cream. Yeah, sure, fuck it. Tell me all about it.

Dr. [REDACTED]: Well, I was recently assigned to a task force working on the SCP-3003 problem—

Security: Oooh, that sounds INTERESTING!

Interviewer: Oh, hey, cool! Are you done putting all of your guns on the floor?

Security:

Security: yep

Interviewer: SHUT THE FUCK UP AND KEEP PUTTING YOUR GUNS ON THE FLOOR

Security: What about stun-guns? Do those count?

Interviewer: WHY WOULD THEY NOT COUNT?

Security: Uh, ‘cuz they’re not really “firearms” per se? And you ONLY said firearms.

Interviewer: I DID NO SUCH FUCKING THING

Security: Well, okay, whatever.

Interviewer: i swear to fuck I will ██████ your ass to SPC-█ and ████ as of █/██/██ to ██████ for the foreseeable ██ in a ██████ to █ ████.

Dr. [REDACTED]: (visibly aroused)

Security: woah okay, wow? uhh, if you REALLY want, I can “divest myself” of all my stun guns, dart guns, shotguns, laser—

Interviewer: wait did you say SHOTGUNS?

Security: Yeah, of course.

Interviewer: Are you under the impression that, when I say “put all your guns on the floor,” I might NOT mean to put down however many FUCKING SHOTGUNS you happen to be carrying at the moment?

All:

Security: Well, you might not. Which is why I asked.

Interviewer: (glare)

Security: Oh well EXCUUUSE ME for seeking some goddamn clarity! Shotguns have a TOTALLY different certification process here on base, so I wasn’t sure if they were included in your new weird, dumb little “no guns” rule.

Interviewer:

Security: TOTALLY. DIFFERENT. CERTIFICATION. PROCESS. See, like, pretty much anyone on Foundation staff is allowed to carry a shotgun. Even D-class, which is totes cray-cray for shay-shay.

Interviewer: That CANNOT be correct.

Dr. [REDACTED]: Nope, that’s accurate. The rule goes all the way back to ██████ on █/██/██.

Interviewer: (closes eyes, massages forehead) oh well that fucking explains it

Dr. [REDACTED]: It does indeed!

Security: Honestly? I’m just shocked that more of the researchers don’t have a shotgun tucked under their arm at all times. Like, there are some parts of the building you’re not “supposed to go into” with a shotgun or whatever, but you can totally carry one to the bathroom or into the commissary or out to your car if you want to.

Dr. [REDACTED]: That is correct. There IS the 20-minute rule, though.

Security: Right! Like, after direct exposure to a cognitohazard you have to put your shotgun down for 20 minutes.

Interviewer:

Dr. [REDACTED]: “For 20 minutes”. WINK LOL.

Security: But, and this is VERY important, it is quite specifically AGAINST Foundation policy to use a shotgun to terminate a member of personnel. We’re supposed to use a sidearm, and getting certified to carry one of THESE bad boys requires is a full afternoon-long training course. It costs $20 to take it, too. And THEN you have to pass a written test, AND you have to re-certify every 72 months.

Interviewer:

Security: Ha! Can you even IMAGINE how much trouble I would be in if I used a SHOTGUN to terminate a member of personnel? Pfft. Jesus, we’re talking easily forty-five, fifty minutes of paperwork.

All:

All: (laugh)

Interviewer: okay but seriously ALL OF YOUR FIREARMS. ALL OF YOUR GUNS. ANYTHING WITH A TRIGGER AND / OR A FIRING MECHANISM, INCLUDING BUT NOT LIMITED TO HARPOON GUNS AND CROSSBOWS ON THE FLOOR NOW

Security: Okay, but I’m gonna be honest with you? I’m gonna feel PRETTY disarmed.

Interviewer: THAT IS ENTIRELY THE GODDAMN POINT. NOW DROP EVERY SINGLE GUN, OF EVERY SINGLE TYPE, THAT YOU ARE CARRYING.

Dr. [REDACTED]:

Dr. [REDACTED]: So ANYWAY, as I was SAYING, I’m putting together this whole proposal where we strap SCP-035 to SCP-096, arm him with SCP-3664, run the bitch through SCP-914 on “Very Fine,” broadcast an image of his ass on state-run media to all thirty billion inhabitants of SCP-3003, then ... well, at that point we sit back, relax, and let nature take its course.

Interviewer:

Dr. [REDACTED]: Maybe have a margarita.

Interviewer: wow holy fuck

Dr. [REDACTED]: Assuming that the resulting anomalous entity can kill 100 people per second, every second, indefinitely, we should achieve 100% planetary depopulation of SCP-3003 within 9.5129 calendar years: a result, even accounting for a 200% margin of error, well-within our 30-year estimated time-window for SCP-2317 to bust-loose & dick-whip THIS shitty planet into a smear of dog turds and punched lasagna.

Security: okay that’s badass

Dr. [REDACTED]: THANK YOU. Can you believe that the previous best proposal was aerosolizing 5.5 quadrillion tons of powdered SCP-960 & SCP-963, mass produced via SCP-038, and venting it into the upper atmosphere?

Security: PFFT. LAME.

Dr. [REDACTED]: Yeah. Like, at that point, why not just convert the whole planet to Catholicism and hope SCP-2852 just casually wanders in?

Security: (jerking-off motions)

Interviewer: Actually, that’s just a smoke-screen. The REAL plan is to ██ under a ███ ████ with SCP-█████ ████ a pigs-in-a-blanket █████ █ utilizing SCPs-1981, 1004, 2030, and 1459 to █████ fucking ███ Marshall Tucker band █ ███ ██ ██ Keter bukkake █ and █ ██████.

Security: (vomits all over the floor)

Dr. [REDACTED]: (attempts, unsuccessfully, to hide erection)

Interviewer: The only real problem is just getting the idiots on SCP-2222 to point their dicks in the right direction. But, I mean, look. It’s a really nice planet. With, like, NO FUCKING KETERS ON IT. It’s the ultimate dorm-room fantasy!

Dr. [REDACTED]: I believe it was the Buddha who said “I dream of a world that has never known war, nor hunger, nor deception, neither need nor fear nor want nor heartbreak, because god DAMN we would totally kick that world’s ASS.”

Interviewer: It’s a planet of 30 billion idiot bug-lickers, and it’s sad that they all have to die--

Dr. [REDACTED]: Is it? 

Interviewer: The Ethics Committee requires that I say “yes”.

All: (nod)

Interviewer: (reading prepared statement) Ah-hem. But, sad as it might be, that’s only 30 billion people, and who gives a shit, ‘cuz fuck it we’ve killed more people than that since last Tuesda— OH SHIT FUCK.

All:

Interviewer: (folding paper & putting it away) Yeah, no, fuck, I shouldn’t have read that to you. Fuck me Buttery Jesus. Okay, so ... goddamn it. Everybody just be sure to take a fuck-ton of Class A amnestics when we’re done here.

Dr. [REDACTED]: oh yeah you got it boss thumbs up

Interviewer: (narrows eyes)

Janitor: (pushes open door, pulling a mop bucket and whistling the theme from ‘Casino Royale‘ by Herb Alpert & the Tijuana Brass)

Security: WOOP WOOP NINJA STARS MOTHER FUCKER YEET (throws a fistful of ninja stars into the Janitor’s face, neck, and torso)

Janitor:

Security: Those were poisoned.

Janitor: (extends middle finger, very slowly collapses to the ground dead)

Interviewer:

Security: okay before you say ANYTHING, those are standard Foundation-issue poisoned ninja stars that ANYONE INCLUDING D-CLASS PERSONNEL is allowed to carry AT ANY TIME and they most DEFINITELY do NOT have a trigger OR a firing mechanism so just handle your shit

Interviewer: (lunges at security officer) FFFUUUU—

Dr. [REDACTED]: Anyway, long story short? I’m gonna need a few thousand D-class. I wanna see if that whole “100 corpses per second” thing is feasible. Which I think it will be. Ugh ... hello?

Interviewer: (still punching security officer)