#hell i use it at times myself and god knows i'm a huge fan of the agonizingly slow romance in general

[augustjustice]

I simply think that Steve "Asks Out Anyone He's Interested In No Matter How Many Times And How Badly He Strikes Out" Harrington and Eddie "Wears His Heart On His Sleeve, Tells The People Around Him Exactly How He Feels Without Prompting" Munson would, once they got even an inkling that they liked each other, have the fastest burn alive.

[nekropsii]

Small Atomic Ask Bomb!!

I've got a bunch of short asks that I'd hate to spam the dash with individually, so I'll just put 'em here, under the cut!!

Content Warning: Long, Brief Discussions of Racism, Misogyny, Grooming, Brief Mentions of Incest and Pedophilia in Fanfiction.

I've always been a hater, and I honestly don't really think it's a bad thing - not as much as everyone says, at least! I think being kind of a bitch about things that don't matter is good for you, actually. Gets the urge to be angry out in a way that's healthier than just snapping at people in critical moments. I also just think being strong and passionate in your convictions is good for you. Being a hater gives you a spine if you do it right, and it fires a gunshot and scatters people you don't really want to be around. It also has the funny side effect of people thinking I take things way more seriously than I do, just because I'm opinionated and will state said opinions clearly. Big fan of this meme:

This is me.

------

I used to peek in there every now and then, just to be nosy. Incest at the top, always. Or straight up pedo shit. Sigh. Looked in the Mituna tag a couple times. CroTuna fucking nightmare hell dimension, always. Or KanTuna, which I also have gripes with. Or KanMiTula, which I have even more gripes with.

It is my understanding that the state of Homestuck fanfiction hasn't gotten much better since the 2010s. Everyone is wrong and no one is normal. Sad.

------

I don't know if the mere act of only making Jade and Jake brown out of all the Kids is Racist on its own, per se, but it is kinda silly in the sense that, you know, John and Jade are siblings, so realistically they'd look similar. And... People absolutely do get racist about it. Like, making Jade and Jake uniquely huge, hairy, threatening, and oddly shaped - gangly in the context of Jade, buff as hell in the context of Jake. I've seen some SEVERELY racist drawings where Jade and/or Jake were the only hints of melanin in the Kid line up and... Oh my god. It can get to straight up caricature levels. Watermelons and everything. Just comedically racist.

------

Genuinely one of the dumbest fucking things in the world. People will say literally anything. Saying Damara isn't Japanese is on par with calling Porrim a fucking Men's Rights Activist. It's a funny little claim people who are grievously wrong say as a condemnation of the Alpha Trolls for no reason. Why. To look smart? To fit in? Dumbass. Notice how they always have to invent bullshit lies to critique anything instead of just saying things that are true. It really frustrates me how 99.9% of Alpha Troll criticism just isn't at all legitimate when there's some real, genuine issues you could critique. It's stupid horseshit. I hate it so badly.

I don't actually care whether or not someone likes the Alpha Trolls, but at least hate them accurately. Come on.

------

@sleepy-apparition

Everyone is so, so quick to turn a blind eye to just how violently misogynistic Kankri is, lmfao. Genuinely, I don't think I've ever seen anyone other than myself bring up the fact that he's an avid Slut-Shamer in the modern day. Other than that, I only really saw older Mituna fanatics bring it up over in the early-mid 2010s, but none of them are around these days.

Genuinely, some of the shit he says is so appalling, lol. Kankri FULLY deserves to get his ass beat.

------

I have said this before but I'll say it again - I do not think a Red Romantic Relationship will fix Dirk, or even really help him all that much. Before he gets into a RedRom, he needs some therapy, a break, and mood stabilizers.

However, I'm thoroughly of the opinion that a good BlackRom could work wonders on him, way more than a RedRom would. I think a solid, established Pitch Relationship with, like, Caliborn would be genuinely great for him, both mentally and in a Character Development sense. I hold zero interest in watching Dirk and Jake badly fumble a traditional romantic relationship - that notion is painful to me. ... But I do think I could read a full Intermission's worth of Dirk and Caliborn fucking around and not get tired of it once. They have a fantastic dynamic. It'd be good for Caliborn, too, I think.

This has been my Dirkuu propaganda bit. Thank you.

Also, the Voyeuristic feel of how people handle his Mental Illness. It makes me uncomfortable.

------

True. I don't have any other remarks to make about this, you're just correct. True.

------

... Fuckin'... Why, though? What- what's the appeal? There's nothing there. I literally cannot conceive any way in which that would be compelling, and I'd say Hal and Kankri are pretty high up there in the list of Male Homestuck Characters I Enjoy.

People will do anything but pay attention to Female Characters for five minutes. God. Lol.

------

It's literally just DaveKat 2. I don't think it even qualifies as a Crack Ship when it's just a variant of The Fandom's Most Darling M/M OTP. It's just a deeply mid RarePair. Crack Ship would be, like, Dirk Strider x Rainbow Dash.

Dirk x RD was a popular Crack Ship, sure, but it's still a Crack Ship on basis of being a Crossover Pairing.

------

I can't recall any specific instances of seeing this myself, but I'll believe it. People will do anything except be normal about Vriska. People will fight the war against Vriska on the side of and against Vriska at the same time. People will call her a Huge 8itch but then call her pathetic when she stops being a Huge 8itch.

We love Misogyny, I guess.

------

Well, he is based on Tumblr, after all. Particularly how dogshit the politics are on here. Of course he would. He'd do numbers on here, considering his Woke Hate Speech.

It's called Bubblr, by the way. Like, canonically. We do know what it's called.

------

It's actually based on the Three Wise Monkeys. You know, that old Japanese Proverb that goes "See No Evil, Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil"? That.

Kurloz is Speak No Evil, Meulin is Hear No Evil, Mituna is See No Evil.

------

Great Question. My personal guess is that he's a little too nuanced for a lot of people to be comfortable with handling. He throws out too much surface-level Bigotry that people aren't willing to ignore because it isn't Racism for many to feel comfortable making him their Blorbo. When Dave says the N-Word and talks about how fucking Racist he is and it literally never gets acknowledged or resolved, that's fine and dandy, but god forbid Caliborn be a Misogynist in the funniest way possible AND have that get acknowledged literally constantly as a problem. The fact that Caliborn isn't a Fuckable White 13-Year-Old Twink means none of his crimes are ever forgivable because he's ugly and unshippable, or whatever.

The fact that he's Mentally Disabled doesn't help. People can't fucking STAND IT when a character is Mentally Disabled in a way that isn't Cute and Consumable, much less a character who is Unconsumably Mentally Disabled AND Complicated. It's just not allowed!!

[hestzhyen]

Chapter 52 Hype Posting

Hi void. I am going to vibrate out of my seat. Oh I'm going feral, absolutely feral. Another WSJ cover and lead colour page next week already! Promotion on TV during prime-time in Japan! The insanely good volume 4 PV! Hokazono-sensei judging for a manga award! Kagurabachi's getting the push to be the Next Big Thing at last- you love to see it.

Kind of.

I want Hokazono-sensei to get all the recognition he deserves, but I also don't want the fandom to explode and become yet another annoying dudebro space. The success of the series is more important though, so I'm happy to see Kagurabachi get so much support. Everyone needs to know about this manga! ANYWAY.

LOOK AT THIS TROLL.

It's Chihiro's turn to have a creepy parasocial admirer now.

Hiruhiko's not doing this just for kicks, however- he deliberately (and successfully) triggered Chihiro to orchestrate his dramatic fall. Given what happened at the end of this chapter, I would not be surprised if Chihiro's literal descent is foreshadowing a metaphorical one of some kind down the line.

And this just breaks my heart:

Triggers Chihiro's rage then fucks off only to do this? I will not be mourning Hiruhiko's death.

Chihiro's not built for being a murder bot and it pains him so much to be seen as equivalent to someone like Hiruhiko. But he was taught to see things through and uses his hatred for the Hishaku to keep going. Revenge is probably the only thing he wakes up every day for- he wasn't kidding about that "fresh hatred" line in chapter 1. And neither was Shiba when he said living like this would break him. This kid needs a hug and a safe place to cry out the pain so badly, man...

More than that, though... more than anything...

HIRUHIKO'S THE FUCKIN' ANTI-HAKURI.

"We're equals", he says. "I killed my family", he mentions. "Let's be friends," he asks as he forces his way into Chihiro's life. "I'm the only one who can understand you." The hell you aren't you rat bastard. Hakuri's the one whose soul resonates with Chihiro's. He's the one Chihiro acknowledged as an equal and a friend. BEGONE, FOUL DEMON.

God damn it. Hokazono, I love you for making my most hated villain archetype into a character I want to see more of. I've never understood why playful psychopaths are so beloved but I get it with this guy. Smooth move making him the evil version of my favourite character in all of fiction, Mr. Author. Now I need Hiruhiko and Hakuri to face off over their ideals about who Chihiro really is. It would be the perfect reprise to the Sojo arc! PLEEEEEEASE. There's so much HakuHiro potential in this setup... Hakuri being the one to pull Chihiro forward again would be amazing. But not for his own goals this time- just to help Chihiro as a true friend and partner. Not gonna get too attached to this since it's just one potential development out of many... I won't let myself... (too late).

(Psst... 昼チ or 昼チヒ will probably be the JP ship tag/name for Hiruhiko/Chihiro. Ain't no way Chihiro is the top in this pair for most Japanese fujin lol.)

The Show

The main character of the play's name is Sasuke and Hokazono-sensei is a huge Naruto fan. So much so that he's taken his own spin on Naruto and Sasuke three times now (Enten, Roku no Meiyaku, Kagurabachi). Chihiro is, in fact, his OC donut steel character inspired by the most annoying emo ninja boy ever. I see you, Hokazono-sensei.

The Battle of Soshima might be a made-up title to reference the real historical event The Battle of Tsushima, which fellow Golden Kamuy fans will recognize. At any rate, there aren't any famous Japanese stage plays with the same name, so there's no direct narrative parallels to draw insight from (sad trombone noises). Fortunately for us Hiruhiko is a yapper like I hoped and tells us the plan pretty plainly anyway:

I relate so hard right now, random audience guy.

Hiruhiko says the plan to kill Chihiro's not a bluff. But he's not acting like he's intends to make good on that statement. So that means...

Perception vs Intent

Chihiro looking his best: stressed and menacing

This is gonna be huge I think. Remember what Azami said back in the Sojo arc in ch. 9:

Azami, please come back soon. I need you carnally.

Then consider likes like this...

Local violent gang member still pretty tough after becoming human shishkebab through a moving train.

Chihiro could be set up to tarnish his father's legacy.

The public doesn't know the true strength or capabilities of the weapons that won the war- they just know that Rokuhira Kunishige made them and they were the key to winning. So Chihiro dropping in on a stage play to splatter the audience with a headless corpse's blood is not a great first impression. He looks downright villainous in this scene. Awesome, but villainous.

The Hishaku are going to metaphorically "kill" Chihiro somehow. For some reason, tormenting this poor guy is absolutely vital to John's plans... it's probably more along the lines of Chihiro being a useful pawn to move around to create conflict they can exploit, but still. They're going to try to break his spirit this arc for sure. Leave Chihiro alone! He's been through enough!

I've got a hell of a lot to say about this but I need some key details from the next few chapters before going off on lunatic tangents. Fuckin' hell though, this is great. This is exactly the type of development I was hoping we'd see after Samura's chapter. Chihiro's committed to the cause of killing the Hishaku, who so far have been wholly unsympathetic villains. But killing is a wrongful act. And this chapter sets up that Chihiro might not be the sympathetic avenging swordsman we love him as in the eyes of the public- he appears to be more of a menace like some of the members of the Kamunabi accused him of. He might be challenged on his murderous modus operandi via a Hishaku-backed smear campaign. Seriously, using Chihiro's brutality against them to ruin his father's legacy would be so evil and cruel. I love it.

We'll be able to count on Shiba and Hakuri to make sure Chihiro doesn't go off the deep end at least. I wouldn't be surprised if Hiyuki played a pivotal role in helping Chihiro out this arc too, but I don't want to commit when we've hardly seen anything of her so far (my spaghetti sovereign... please come back to the main story full-time soon).

Whether or not I'm right (I'm not, I never am), Chihiro's murder sprees fueled by Fresh Hatred are going to get looked at in a critical way. High time and I am definitely here for it. Tell me what you've got to say about violent revenge motivated by grief, Hokazono-sensei. You have more space to examine the topic now compared to Farewell! Cherry Boy.

Shorter than usual but that's not a bad thing. I can always come back and edit this (came back to do so twice now already) or make another addendum post, but...

... Just choose kindness, people. For yourself and others. See you later.

[f1letters]

maroon | cs55

"how the hell did we lose sight of us again? sobbing with your head in your hands, ain't that the way shit always ends?"

summary: they both knew their relationship would ruin them both, but they couldn't stop themselves from running back to each other every goddamn time

warning: angst, toxic relationship, mentions of a vicious cycle of breaking up and making up, right person wrong time, suggestive language, swearing, a bunch of references to older classic rock bands and albums (and CAS because they are my fav band of all time haha), open ending

pairing: carlos sainz x reader

word count: 4.3k

note: everything in bold are song references and in italic are thoughts, which includes memories from the past.

spanish words used: hermosa = beautiful; corazón = heart

hey everybody! honestly, this song is the one I've been looking forward to writing the most since the beginning... I worked so hard and I gave everything I had in me to this story (hence the story being the longest so far, something about writing for Carlos just makes me write so much more every time, haha), I couldn't be more proud of what I did! haha, hopefully, you guys love it as much as I do! happy holidays to everyone! 💜

masterlist

When the morning came

We were cleaning incense off your vinyl shelf

'Cause we lost track of time again

Laughing with my feet in your lap

Like you were my closest friend

Dozens of voices echoed through the crowded room, engaged in different conversations and dialogues.

The crowd seemed to have a life of its own. Old friends catching up on the latest news in their lives. New friends being made unexpectedly. The sharing of the latest gossip and rumours among the most curious souls. The sound of endless, genuine laughter through the halls.

In the middle of the glowing lights, the shiny clothes and the loud music, hidden in the shadows, there she was.

Y/N had escaped the huddled bodies until she found refuge in an empty room. With the door closed, the noise of the party was now muffled, leaving the girl alone with her thoughts as she searched through a vinyl shelf she found there.

Led Zeppelin. Pink Floyd. Radiohead. The Clash. Their owner had taste, she thought, fascinated by their timeless records. The young woman also appreciated these older classic albums, although she couldn't find many people like her.

With her hands roaming over the vinyl without much care for the party happening, Y/N nearly dropped a Nirvana album on the floor when the bedroom door burst open.

"Oh." The unknown man said, stopping in his track when he came face to face with her. "Sorry, but do I know you?"

"Hmm, I don't think so." The girl frowned in doubt. Her eyes widened as she realized she was clearly breaking into someone's room. "Oh my god, is this your room? It is, isn't it? What was I thinking going in like that-"

"Hey, don't worry! It's okay! I just wasn't expecting to see anyone in here." He chuckled softly, extending his hand to the girl. "I'm Carlos, and you are...?"

"Y/N, nice to meet you!" She shook his hand back. The girl could have sworn she felt a spark run through her veins as soon as she felt his touch.

"Hmm, sorry for going through your stuff. I- I'm a huge music lover and I- Just couldn't help myself." The girl continued, half choking up, half laughing at herself, lifting the album in her hand to show Carlos what she was doing.

"I don't mind." The driver responded, approaching her and taking the vinyl from her hold. The warm skin of his hand contrasted with her cool one, letting his touch linger. "So, are you a Nevermind fan?"

"More of a Bleach girl myself." Y/N said smugly, her eyes glazing over the boy's charming figure before returning to the shelf. "You have an incredible collection. I wish I had this many records."

"How'd we end up on the floor, anyway?" you say

"Your roommate's cheap-ass screw-top rosé, that's how"

I see you every day now

Hours passed, and both lost track of time as they talked about everything and anything. 

Y/N and Carlos were instantly attracted to each other, bonded not just by their shared love of music but by a soul connection neither could explain.

It was profound in ways that were beyond physical attraction, it had to be experienced to be truly understood.

Almost like their souls knew each other from the past.

The couple stood there, only a few hours after they met, sitting on the floor of his bedroom. They laughed with her feet in his lap, with a cheap-ass screw-top bottle of rosé beside them.

It was like an enchanting enigma how much they felt like each other's closest friends, like they had been part of each other's lives forever.

A Fleetwood Mac song was playing from Carlos's red vinyl record player when the woman spoke. "Isn't it crazy that I ended up at your house party and didn't even know who you were until you walked into this room?"

The two chuckled softly as their eyes locked and the driver's hand ran along the top of her thigh. "A bit maybe." He bit his bottom lip, a little unsure and nervous. Deciding to take risks that night, he continued. "But it was totally worth sneaking in here and skipping the party just to meet you."

Y/N could feel her cheeks heat up as they flushed. The girl tucked a strand of her hair behind her ear and looked away from him to the floor.

"I don't know about you," Carlos again captured the attention of the girl beside him, approaching her little by little. "But I don't think I've ever felt this chemistry with anyone in my entire life, hermosa."

Driven by her impulsiveness and by the tension that hung in the air, the young woman made the first move and closed the space between them, letting her lips rest on his in a much-desired kiss. 

It started out soft and slow, their hearts beating faster and faster as the adrenaline grew. Y/N let her mouth open a little, and the driver took that as a sign to let his tongue swirl in her mouth. Her hands found their place among the brown locks of his wild hair, as he pulled her body towards him until she was on top of him.

Y/N was never one for one-night stands or sex on the first date, but that moment felt different for her. None of it felt sudden, ill-considered, or a mistake.

In fact, Y/N had never felt like anything was so right as pulling the Spaniard onto his bed mattress that night.

And I chose you

The one I was dancing with

In New York, no shoes

Looked up at the sky and it was

For the next six months, Y/N and Carlos were inseparable.

Their feelings for each other continued to grow stronger and stronger with every passing day. However, the two kept them secret from each other, hidden in the privacy of their own minds.

During those magical months since the night they'd met, they'd given themselves to each other, body and soul. But they both knew there was something more between them: something impossible to ignore, something special.

So special that the two feared they would ruin it by putting a title on their relationship.

They were… Friends with benefits, lovers, soulmates? All options were honest and sincere, but they were only attempts to escape the term "boyfriend and girlfriend".

Painting New York City white, snowflakes fell from the skies while shimmering under the lights like jewels bestowed by winter.

The couple could already see their destination, such was the way the girl's maroon apartment building stood out among the snow-covered sidewalks.

Carlos hugged her waist from behind, squeezing the girl's body and picking her up off the ground.

"Carlos, stop! You're going to drop me, you idiot!" Y/N squealed playfully, being immediately put down again in front of her door.

The driver placed a tender kiss on her forehead and then adjusted the black beanie that covered the top of her head. "I would never let you fall, corazón."

Except I already fell for you, she thought to herself, making her heart ache.

The two hurriedly climbed the building's stairs, eager to return to the warmth of her home. They had barely passed the front door when the two started taking off their cold and damp shoes in search of some relief from the discomfort in their feet.

The Cigarettes After Sex album that they were listening to before leaving her living room continued to echo through the walls of the apartment. Immediately, Carlos grabbed her hand and pulled her towards him, wrapping her shoulders with his arms as he started to sway their connected bodies gently to the music.

"What are you doing?" Y/N asked, caught off guard by the driver's movements.

"What do you think I'm doing?" Carlos asked playfully, running his hand through the young woman's long hair. "I'm dancing with you to your favourite band."

Just when she thought it wasn't possible for her feelings to grow any further, Carlos seemed to challenge her, proving her wrong all over again. Her heart could explode at any second with how much love for the Spaniard she kept in it.

"Carlos?" She asked in a whisper.

"Yes, hermosa?" He replied in the same tone.

"I'm so glad I chose you."

In the end, what mattered to them was seizing the moment before it was over, being happy with each other before the inevitable end came.

Both Y/N and Carlos couldn't help sensing that they were doomed to end sooner or later.

The burgundy on my t-shirt

When you splashed your wine into me

And how the blood rushed into my cheeks

So scarlet, it was

Eventually, the first signs of the end of their honeymoon phase began to appear.

Their flaws seemed more noticeable, their patience thinner, and their problems more difficult to solve.

All of a sudden, the illusion that their relationship was perfect started to fade with time.

The two began to see themselves as opponents with their backs turned to each other instead of the hopelessly in love souls they were in the beginning.

On a random spring night, the two were getting ready for another one of their dates, in the privacy of his house, like they did so many times before.

The two naturally assumed their tasks without much dialogue at this point: Y/N was leaning over the stove as she finished cooking dinner for them, while Carlos was in the dining room setting the table.

After completing what he had to do, the driver went to the kitchen in search of a wine to serve with the pasta that his lover was preparing. He opened the pantry and took out his favourite red wine from one of the bottom shelves.

Carlos walked to one of the drawers, removing his corkscrew from it, and opened the bottle without knowing that Y/N was moving dangerously close to him. 

By accident, his sudden movement caused the bottle to splash onto the once-white t-shirt the young woman wore, now leaving a huge burgundy mark on it.

"Are you fucking serious?" Y/N complained, disgusted with the state of her outfit. "This t-shirt is new, Carlos. For fuck's sake, this stain is never coming off."

"Calm down, it's not like someone died. It's just a fucking t-shirt, Y/N." Carlos replied, in the same aggressive tone. "I'll buy you a new one. Don't let this night be ruined for something so small."

"You'll buy it?! You always think that your money solves everything, don't you?" The girl spat, starting her way to her room to change her clothes. "I just wish you would be careful for once in your life and not be so fucking clumsy."

"It's a piece of fabric, oh my God." Carlos followed her, not ready to give up. "Get over it!"

"You know what? Enjoy your dinner alone. I'm out of here."

And so their new routine began: they argued, they fucked, they made up, they repeated.

The rooms they'd once set on fire with their burning, sizzling passion were now left in ashes, burned by the flame that brought them back to each other's arms, time after time.

The mark they saw on my collarbone

The rust that grew between telephones

The lips I used to call home

So scarlet, it was maroon

Fight after fight, the two kept finding their way to each other every single time, like two individuals relapsing on their favourite addiction.

The young woman had been dragged by the Spaniard to another one of his races, though as a very discreet and unknown guest.

Nobody knew her in that world, not even his closest colleagues, and Y/N couldn't help but feel hurt by all of Carlos' secrecy.

Okay, they weren't together-together, but the fact that she wasn't even mentioned to his best friends still seemed like a red flag to her.

Y/N had managed to escape to his room without anyone noticing, coming face to face with the shirtless figure with his back to her.

"Hey, handsome." The girl approached him, placing her hands on his chest as she leaned against his naked back.

"Corazón, you are here." The driver turned towards her, placing a kiss on her lips and down along the side of her neck. "I missed you so much. These weeks without you have driven me crazy."

"Hmm... Were you missing me or having me?" Y/N questioned, trying to pretend to be unaffected by the way his mouth sucked on her collarbone so sensually.

The boy turned his eyes to her gaze and cupped her face gently in his hands. "You, hermosa. You."

Their moment was interrupted by a member of Ferrari knocking on the door, warning Carlos that he would have to prepare for the driver's parade. Both of them slipped from his room and the motorhome, coming across two other drivers she recognized from watching other races.

"Well, well, well," Lando announced, messing with Carlos and his mystery companion. "What do we have here? Sainz, you don't even introduce your 'friend' here to your boys"

"Pfff, friend." The Spaniard's teammate, Charles, replied, also joking. "At least her fresh hickey tells me otherwise."

The girl immediately looked down at the neckline of her shirt, where she noticed the love bite near her neck.

And when her gaze rested on her lover's annoyed face, she realized how unhappy he was that they got caught.

When the silence came

We were shaking, blind and hazy

How the hell did we lose sight of us again?

Sobbing with your head in your hands

Ain't that the way shit always ends?

"Since this muppet here doesn't want to introduce us, I'll do the honours. I'm Lando, this is Charles." The McLaren driver said, pointing to his Ferrari friend, followed by his outstretched hand towards the girl.

"Nice to meet you both, I'm Y/N." She greeted the British, and then the Monegasque.

"So why are you hiding your beautiful girlfriend from us, Sainz?" Charles asked curiously.

"She's not my girlfriend, I have to go." Carlos replied, turning away and leaving behind two shocked friends, a hurt girl and her heart broken into little pieces.

After hearing a thousand apologies from the two nice guys for meddling in matters that weren't theirs, Y/N decided to walk to the exit of the circuit and skip the race altogether.

Hours passed and only silence came to her hotel room, with no sign of Carlos.

The girl sat on the floor, back against the bed covered with a maroon duvet, shaking, blind and hazy, until he eventually appeared.

How the hell did we lose sight of us again, she thought to herself over and over again.

The driver entered the room, shoulders slumped in regret, expecting to find an upset Y/N he had to apologize to.

Never did he expect to find the girl he loved sobbing with her head in her hands.

Carlos knelt down in front of the young woman, placing his hands on her knees, which provoked her to look at him with eyes smudged with mascara.

"Sorry, hermosa." The boy apologized, letting his forehead rest against her knee.

"Sorry for what, Carlos?" Y/N asked, determined to get the truth out of him.

"I shouldn't have turned away and left you alone with Lando and Charles." The Spaniard confessed. "I understand that you didn't see the race, but it's done now, you don't need to be like that..."

"The discussion is over, yes." The girl spoke, getting up from the floor and looking at the image of him still kneeling. "But us, this, whatever it is, that is over too."

"Stop, Y/N!" The driver also got to his feet, trying to stop her from leaving. "This is just another argument. We always come back to each other, that's the way shit always ends."

The woman released her wrist from his hold, opened the door and glanced at him over her shoulder before walking away.

"Not this time."

You were standing hollow-eyed in the hallway

Carnations you had thought were roses, that's us

I feel you, no matter what

The rubies that I gave up

A day passed. Then two days. Three days.

On the fourth day, the doorbell to her New York apartment rang and her heart just knew that he was going to be the person behind the door.

Y/N opened the entrance to her house and there he was as expected: Carlos, standing there, hollow-eyed in the hallway, flowers in hand.

"Before you interrupt me, I beg you: please, listen to what I have to say. Then you can send me away if you want and I'll go." Carlos begged her, his hands gripping the red flowers more tightly. "I love you. I'm sorry I came to that conclusion so late but I do, I love you. So much my chest hurts whenever I'm not with you. And I know I've been an asshole to you, especially on this last race, and I know I don't deserve you but I'm not ready to give up on you, on us."

The young woman remained silent, listening to the words she'd been waiting to hear all these months.

But they were too late.

"These roses are for you, corazón. I know they are your favourite flowers." The driver held the flowers out to her.

"Carnations," Y/N replied, leaving the Spaniard more confused than ever. "These are carnations, not roses."

The two kept their eyes together until a tear ran down the girl's eyes. And both of them knew.

"I'm sorry, Carlos, but you should leave." Y/N sobbed. "I loved you all this time but I had enough."

And I lost you

The one I was dancing with

In New York, no shoes

Looked up at the sky and it was

Maroon

It took six months for them to end their perfect, magical honeymoon phase. 

Followed by another six months of endless fighting and pain inflicted on each other.

Perhaps in some poetic way, six months passed from Y/N losing him until they saw each other again.

Nothing hurt more than being away from the one person she loved more than anyone. Especially when she knew the passion and the love between them were still there.

She couldn't help feeling that they were two cursed souls destined to suffer for their love.

Without Carlos, even music seemed to sound different. 

Since the day she saw the boy walk out the door, her vinyl had remained exactly in the same place, gathering dust, as she didn't have the courage to listen to them again without being consumed by memories of them.

Trapped in her thoughts on yet another sleepless night, Y/N looked up at the sky and thought to herself: I can't die from a broken heart, but I can't help but feel like a part of me did that day.

The burgundy on my t-shirt

When you splashed your wine into me

And how the blood rushed into my cheeks

So scarlet, it was

Maroon

Tired of brooding over the excruciating time away from the driver, Y/N relented and agreed to leave the comfort of her home to go to a party for the first time in a long time.

Dressed to the nines, the girl found herself in a crowd in the middle of an unfamiliar house.

It was the same as always: old friends, new friends, gossip, rumours, laughter, shining lights, loud music.

The young woman simply couldn't enjoy that life as she did before. All she wanted was to go home, lay under the covers, with the fire burning on her fireplace... But the memories that place held of him began to feel like they were too much for her to bear.

Alcohol in her hand, as usual, Y/N escaped the noise to a random room in the house, much like the night she met Carlos. 

This time, the girl found herself in the middle of a guest room, with nothing more than a bed and some basic furniture, where she sat enjoying a sweet drink.

Mirroring that night even further, Y/N was stunned when the white bedroom door opened to let in the tanned, handsome boy who was consuming her head.

"Oh," Carlos said, unable to contain his feelings when he saw the woman again after so long. "Hey, I- I was just looking for the bathroom. I- I'm going to go."

"No, wait!" Unconsciously, Y/N stood up, grabbing the driver's wrist without giving it much thought until she felt the blood rush into her cheeks. "Sorry, I don't know what I'm doing. I just- I don't know... I miss you."

The Spaniard let her words sink in, all emotions on the surface. "Y/N... Please, don't do this. I don't know if I can survive another heartbreak."

"You're right, I'm sorry. Forget this ever happened." Y/N got ready to walk out the door until it was the boy's turn to grab her arm.

Carlos pulled her towards him, grabbing her face with both hands and pulling her into a so-desired kiss filled with longing, pain, and lust.

The mark they saw on my collarbone

The rust that grew between telephones

The lips I used to call home

So scarlet, it was maroon

His lips brushed hers, allowing him to inhale her breath and feel the warmth of her mouth, until he let his lips mash against hers in a rough, heated kiss.

She opened her mouth quickly, pushing her tongue past his teeth and meeting him in an electric and passionate battle. 

Both lay on the bed, her straddling his body like she did a million other times, her lips still glued to the ones she used to call home.

They both pull away, panting with their gazes focused on each other almost as if they were afraid the moment would suddenly be over.

"I still love you, hermosa." Carlos confessed, letting the words slip out. "There wasn't a day that I didn't think of you, or that I didn't want your body next to mine just like this."

For one more night, Y/N gave in to her most intimate desires and allowed herself to enjoy the feeling of belonging in the arms of the man she loved again, as she removed her dress and her lips returned to where they belonged - his.

And I wake with your memory over me

That's a real fucking legacy, legacy

And I wake with your memory over me

That's a real fucking legacy to leave

Such was the girl's amazement when hours later she woke up in the same bed, alone with only his memory over her.

The wrinkled sheets on the right side of the mattress were the only sign that the driver had been in that room the night before. 

Not a note, a discarded piece of clothing, a stray hair.

Just crumpled linens and the marks of his love smeared across her soft skin.

Once again, Y/N was left with only her regrets and her sorrows for being so weak and so naive to think this time would be different.

That was the legacy he left every time: his touch on her remained, as did his absence.

The burgundy on my t-shirt

When you splashed your wine into me

And how the blood rushed into my cheeks

So scarlet, it was maroon

Back at home, the girl went straight to her room, wanting nothing more than to get out of her dirty clothes from the night before. 

Her hands started their work of removing the dress, until she stopped in her tracks, naked in front of her bathroom mirror, when she saw the marks left by Carlos all over her for the first time.

She swallowed hard, trying to hold back the tears that threatened to fall, as she stepped into the shower.

The hot water ran through her hair, over her shoulders, and down her back, until loneliness overcame her and her eyes wept and wept away all the hurt she felt.

How could I have been stupid enough to fall again, she wondered.

After a few minutes of crying and showering, Y/N left the bathroom, towel wrapped around her body, and went to her dresser in search of an old t-shirt to wear.

Among the dozens of her neutral shirts, one stood out. It was scarlet, and it was his.

Without thinking twice, she grabbed the t-shirt and draped it over her body, ready to give in to the sadness. Her arms hugged her own torso, seeking physical comfort in a place where she was the only person left.

Or so she thought until she heard the familiar doorbell ring later that night.

The mark they saw on my collarbone

The rust that grew between telephones

The lips I used to call home

So scarlet, it was maroon

The only light on the dark street that night was the street light that lit up the star-crossed lovers ever so slightly.

There he was, standing outside of the door of her maroon building, red roses in hand this time, face pleading for forgiveness. 

Although their lives might not have fit together, they were just two broken souls who had found solace in each other's hearts, unwilling to give up on the greatest love they had ever known.

And just like that, pulled back into their vicious cycle, all she had consuming her mind was him all over again.

"Hey, corazón."

It was maroon

It was maroon

taglist: @dan3avocado @starxqt @roseinnej @spiidergirlsworld @ccloaned @hotpigeon22 @dr3lover @lovelytsunoda @primadonnasdream @luxebeautystyle @wallfloweriism @ilivefortheleague @gwynethhberdara @satellitelh @adavenus @audreyscodes @wifeoflucyboynton @th6ccnsp6cyy @classifiedsblog @flyingmushroomss @motylekrozi @claramllera @gabrielamaex @handsupforamiracle @pierre-gasssllyy @lorenaloveslewis

@idkiwantchocolatee @simpforsunwoo @kissatelier @xweirdxsceletton @micksmidnights @miniminescapist @inchidentwithmax @hopelesslyromantics-world @alwaysclassyeagle @indieclarke @capela-miranda @okokoksblog @pulpfixion @sins-only33 @sainzclerc @allisonxf1 @honethatty12

@amsofftrack @scuderiamh @junkiespromise @loudoperahumanoidpanda @honeyric3 @holy-macncheese-balls @ricciardosheart @pierreverstapkin @ravenqueen27 @majkaftorek @home-of-disaster @buendiabebeta @itgirlofnowhere @roses-of-eden @thewintersunset @rubychocolatechips

(taglist continues in the comments)

thank you to everyone that asked to be tagged! please let me know if you want to be added to the next stories! 💌

[alterrune]

A MESSAGE FROM IRL!ALTERRUNE

tw: the 2024 election, politics, homophobia

Do I have to fucking do this...?

Yes, Kyle. I know you don't want to talk about this, but we need you to say something about your sudden absense from the story.

(Kyle's been in his room ever since 'the event' happened. He's been facedown on his bed ever since and is being incredibly rude and vulgar, even to Harmony and Synth. I've been trying to convince him to say something about this for a long time, and he finally let me do it after I intercepted an order from the cafeteria for him and said he'd have to leave his room for food until he did what I wanted. Believe it or not, he actually SUPPORTED the-President-that-must-not-be-named back in 2016, which he now considers as one of his biggest regrets. So seeing him back in power...yeah, his past came back to haunt him, and it's haunting him HARD.)

Let's just get this fucking over with.

Are you going to lift your head up, or...?

No. I'm fucking fine. Let's get this shit done.

(He's also been swearing like a sailor, and if you could hear his voice right now, it'd sound like he was totally and utterly exhausted. Which, to be frank, he is. He shot off numerous rounds into the walls of his room [which he said he'd pay the repair costs in full for], and told me he had to empty every single round of ammunition he had on him into the furniture and walls of his room so he didn't shoot a person. Of course he's exhausted.)

"okay, we're rolling."

Hey everyone. It's IRL!Alterrune here. And I'm fucking off for a bit.

To every fucking one of you in the USA right now who actually used their fucking brains during the elections: You have my sincerest condolences.

I supported that motherfucker, and to this goddamn day, I still consider that my biggest fucking regret ever.

"You're Canadian, why should you care?" Because thanks to the dumbass people who fucking supported that jerk-off, EVERYONE loses. The USA is incredibly powerful, so yeah, everyone on Earth, INCLUDING THEIR NEXT-DOOR-NEIGHBOR CANADA, fucking loses.

I am fucking retracting myself from the story for a bit. I don't know when I'll be back. But until he either gets impeached or fucking assassinated, I'm going to stay like this. And I sincerely hope it's the latter. I hope someone fucking blows his motherfucking brains out all over the goddamn floor and---

OOOOKAY, Kyle, that's enough of that! Let's move on, please!

(Kyle gives us a sneer. Excuse me, Kyle, but I'm not the one insinuating ASSASSINATION OF THE PRESIDENT OF THE UNITED STATES OF AMERICA here! I'm trying to stop you before you get us all in trouble!)

Regardless, as I was fucking saying, I'll be gone from the story for I don't even fucking know how long. I'll be back, but until then, I hope HE goes down before shit hits the fan.

And by the way, Vi. Believe me when I say this: there is a fucking LINE-UP for people trying to assassinating him. I'm MOST CERTAINLY NOT one of them because I'm not fucking looking to add "terrorist" to my resume, but there are others out there who can and WILL try to get a hit on him, and I'll be overjoyed when they finally kill him and fucking finally send him straight to Hell.

Vi? We should probably cut the feed before he says anything else that'll get us in HUGE trouble.

"HE'S ALREADY SAID ENOUGH. CUT THE FEED, ALREADY."

WAIT. There's one more thing I want to say.

(Kyle suddenly forces his head up...and...oh god. He hasn't been taking his sleeping pills for his insomnia, his face clearly shows that he hasn't gotten any sleep. He looks AWFUL. However, his angry expression suddenly changes into a somber one.)

(ahem)

To anyone who's in the LGBTQIA+ community:

Don't give up. Fight. Fight like you've never fucking fought before. He says you don't exist? Fuck him. You do exist. Don't let him drive you to suicide, that's exactly what he wants you to do. I may be straight, but I'm not going to sit back and let him ruin all of you. I don't care what the hell he says or does, BREAK THE LAW if you have to. Love is love, and fuck me if I'm letting that BASTARD try and ruin that.

(We all suddenly look in shock. Kyle, completely unprompted, just straight-up gave a sincere and heartfelt speech, and didn't add any unneccesary pander to it. ON ALMOST NO SLEEP.)

(While we're all picking our jaws up off the ground, Kyle gets back onto his bed, this time lying on his back with a pillow over his face.)

Okay. I'm done. Cut the fucking feed now.

(Harmony stops the feed on Kyle's command. Holy shit, what just happened?)

Well, that...could've gone better.

Yeah, but...that speech at the end. Kyle just suddenly did a 180 degree spin on that entire thing.

What the hell even happened there?

Yeah, Kyle, what was with that sudden shift?

I said exactly what had to be said. That the LGBTQIA+ community shouldn't give up just because the-President-that-must-not-be-named said so. If the world wants to fucking explode itself, then by god, I'm making sure I'm staying on the chunk of earth that has the right people on it. I had a PRIDE MONTH EVENT for AtO, so believe me when I say that I do not (and never will) support the actions he is taking. I will NOT let him fuck up the people in that community no matter what. I will defend them with my life if I have to.

Wow. I...uh...never expected YOU to be this defensive about this.

Who else will be?

Fair enough.

Alright, everyone, let's leave Kyle alone for a bit. I think he needs to take his insomnia pills.

Oh shit...I completely forgot to take them. Yeah, I think some rest would be nice.

(I escort everyone out of the room, as Kyle takes his sleeping pills and conks out almost immediately.)

Thanks, Kyle. Glad to know that even in times of peril, you still know who the good guys are, and you rush to defend them.

(I close the door to Kyle's room, leaving him to his nap. Sweet dreams, Kyle, hope you come back soon.)

STATUS OF IRL!ALTERRUNE: OFFLINE

[sapphire-weapon]

I just wanted to say that as a person in their early 20s who only just got into resident evil after re8, it was so fun finding your blog and scrolling through all the little blurbs you’ve got. fandom elders always have the best resources and lore and make spaces a million times better, so thank u for mentioning all the little game details and fandom notes that would’ve been forgotten or missed otherwise to newcomers!!

on another note, i wanted to ask if you had any amusing/chaotic tidbits relating to the re fandom in its earlier days, whether it be speculations of scenes or character directions or interactions that people were so sure were going to happen in later re games that absolutely did not happen, fics that were really influential, insane fanwar stories, memes that used to be rlly prolific and now don’t really come up, etc. it’s something i love to discover about fandoms because it rlly is a “you had to be there,” type of information that people don’t document the way they would with canon developments that you can easily find on wikipages

Anon... I'm gonna fucking cry. 😭 This is exactly what I wanted this blog to become once I realized I was falling back into RE hell. Anything that I can do to make this canon more accessible to new people, I want to do it. I think I've said this before, but I literally cannot imagine what it must be like getting into this series this late in the game, because RE is terrifyingly huge and abstract and very old by video game standards.

As for the second part of your ask... Man, I have so many stories. I won't tell all of them, because if I try to, it'll be weeks before I can post this LMAO so let me just break this up into sections and I'll tell whatever the first stories that pop into my head are.

FAN THEORIES

So, historically, RE fandom was never big on fan theories. Fan theories and meta were something that Silent Hill people did, not so much RE people.

BUT there is one that refuses to die, and I have seen people scream about it as recently as Revelations 2.

People are convinced that Steve Burnside is going to come back. This drum has been getting banged ever since the original Code Veronica released in 2000, and even though it has literally never been hinted at at any point in the 23 years since then that Capcom even remembers that that was a possible thing that was set up, the fandom is still waiting for it to happen.

And it's all because Wesker stole his body and fucked off with it and was a complete asshole about it when he did it. That's it, that's the whole reason.

But then that also ties into the fact that there are still people who are convinced that Wesker didn't actually die in RE5 and that he's gonna come back any day now, guys, really -- and that's just a whole level of death denial I've never seen before. Dude got hit with two rocket launchers in the middle of an active volcano. YOU LITERALLY DO NOT GET MORE DEAD THAN THAT.

INFLUENTIAL FICS

Surprisingly, none. RE didn't have an "I Know What's Beneath the Snow Fields" or a "Walk This World." There were influential authors, though. I won't name them because I have no idea where they are now or if they're still around, but. I will say that there was one very influential fic writer in Cleon fandom who utilized literally so many headcanons in her fics that her characters were utterly unrecognizable. Some of the headcanons blatantly contradicted canon, even. But her writing style and her prose were so, so, so fucking good that it didn't matter. For a while, Cleon fandom almost became like a cult around her fics -- and, as someone who only dabbled in Cleon because my friends shipped it, but I had no personal stake in the ship myself -- it was really, really weird to watch this go down.

INSANE FAN WAR STORIES

I was going to go off on a huge thing about the Aeon vs Cleon wars, but seeing as how they're still fucking happening for some god forsaken dumbass reason, I decided not to.

So, we'll forget that. And while this isn't a war story, exactly, I do need to give a special shoutout to the Wesker wives of old.

If you are at all familiar with the stories of old school Final Fantasy VII fandom of girls who convinced themselves that they married Sephiroth on the astral plane -- guess what. RE fandom had those girls, too, and we called them Wesker wives.

There was one really prominent one on LiveJournal back in the day who used to get art commissioned of her and Wesker together, and she would post pictures of herself "in uniform" for him, and like. Would legitimately write as though she was actually married to the fictional character Albert Wesker. She'd answer questions from people and shit.

And she was really, really pretty, so everyone was just kind of stunned by this, because this girl very clearly took care of herself and worked out and knew how to do her hair and makeup -- she always looked really good -- and it was just like... how did someone like you fall so far off the reality wagon?

And then it slowly started to come out that she maybe had some nazi ideology behind her and kept referring to Wesker has her Aryan king or someshit, and that was about the point where my Jewish ass backed away from that whole trainwreck and stopped paying attention to it, so I don't actually know how this story ends.

MEMES

So, uh. If you've been on the fandom side of the internet long enough, you'll at least have heard of the "it's over 9000" meme, even if you're not into Dragon Ball or ever seen an episode of it in your life.

Well, the same guy who started that meme also left his mark on RE fandom, too. The whole "Jill sandwich" thing was always a meme in its own right, but "Hope this is not Chris's blood" was added onto it thanks to this video. So, "Hope this is not Chris's blood" was a big, big meme in the late aughts that I really don't see around anymore. It was used as a sort of... shitpost response to a shitpost, if that makes sense? Like, your friend sends you some obviously stupid bullcrap or a dumb meme and you just respond back "hope this is not chris's blood."

This cap from Code Veronica was a huge meme for a long time, too, and I DO NOT FUCKING KNOW WHY

And then.

There was this masterpiece. Do not watch this with other people in the room unless your willingness to let others bear witness to your own cringe is very high. It's also NSFW. And, actually, this video might be the single oldest meme in RE fandom history. The YT link I provided here is not the original source of it. It was some stupid fan edit that was making its rounds on Kazaa, and I'm not joking. I want to say this edit is no younger than OG RE2 (so 1998).

And I would negligent in my duties as a fandom historian if I did not introduce you to the glory that is Resident Evil 4 Days of Our Lives. I STILL QUOTE THIS SHIT, TO THIS DAY.

Like, this is me on plurk referencing this stupid fucking shit as I'm liveplurking my very first playthrough of RE4R:

There was a part of me that was honestly kind of upset when the two cops at the beginning of RE4make didn't actually say to Leon, "I hear no one listens to you. Is that true, Captain Cubscout?" because that is unironically the single greatest line of dialogue that was ever written to be said by any character to Leon Kennedy, and it was written by some fuckin college kids back in the mid aughts.

And that's all I can think of for right now.

Thank u for indulging my old person desire to ramble on about "BACK IN MY DAY........." I appreciate u.

ETA: ok like i know i said i was only gonna mention shit that i could think of at the time that i responded to the ask but there is one more meme that i would be remiss to not mention

[adder24]

Mohawk Reynolds went to Wales Comic con

To all I know and love, here is tagging you

@untilthe12ofnever @nuggsmum @alwayscaskett810 @the-boneyard-rider @hellostickerdoodle @superlc529 @happiness-in-the-dark @my-happy-corner @nfcastle @dailynathanfillions @abettis41319 @captkatecastle @frenchfrostpudding @gracielaposts

Well actually it was more Telford than it was Wales, there is a whole 61 miles between the Welsh boarder and Telford. ANYWAY not the point!

First I did a Video explaining it, just in case you are not keen on reading me ramblings

I traveled and stayed over night, all by myself and attended the comic con...all by myself! Probably not a great deal to some people but to me it was a huge massive bloody step in my ongoing tussle with my mental health.

Probably asking why I decided to take this leap, welp let me show you why.

THIS GUY!

As soon as I was told he was attending I literally told myself "We're doing this!" because the chances of him attending another comic con in this country were probably slim.

So I took that plunge and yes I was DREADING it soon after I booked up, I was like "Shit I actually have to go" Talk about putting pressure on yourself.

I also made the Decision to dress up and of course it had to be Reynolds, only with a difference...I was having a Mohawk and at the very last minute, I decided "I'm taking Thor's hammer" because it's the most Mal esque job he would do. Can hear Badger approaching him and going "Got a weapon of the gods that needs shipping. You in?" and of course he and the crew would tussle over who can lift the damn thing!

So let me introduce you to Mohawk Reynolds.

I'm not very tall and the jacket was almost as big as me! However...people knew who I was portraying and that was all that mattered (Yes I was wearing suspenders but the jacket was hiding them) and a lot of people dressed as Thor were like "Reynolds, give that back"

So I walked around, got a few compliments , was told I looked awesome, got fist bumps and everything, I even had kids that wanted to try and pick up Thor's hammer. You'll be pleased to know they were worthy.

Anyway to the point Adder..stop venturing off, Yes I went and met Fillion!

He was lovely! At first, before I even got to him (I was one person out) My nerves was making my heart race and I said loudly (because nerves are twats), as I was coming up to be next "Now is not the time to have a heart attack Adds!" Which he heard...and he looked at me and asked if I was okay. Gave him the thumbs up, then I went over to him, he offered his hand and I shook it and then, I swear the guy must have known I was cheeky cause he studied me and went "So who have you come as?" And I was like "Dude!" And his response was "I'm kidding! I'm kidding, cool hair though!"

I got trolled by Fillion!!!

So picture got took and can I just say, the way that man moved me into position...holy hell! Put me under a mind spell I bloody swear.

Look at my stupid face!

Then the next thing was the panel, obviously it was a firefly panel with Nathan, Jewel Staite and Sean Maher (Mal, Kaylee and Simon) And they spoke about how 20 years on, it just won't die, how new fans are still being introduced and how pivotal this thing was for a generation of people.

Then the floor opened up for questions and...Oh man...man do my arms ache...but it was worth it! At first I was using my arms, then I got bored of that and was like "Sod it, I'm using the hammer" So up went the hammer, questions were going in and then after a little while the main presenter guy was like "That's all we have time for" Booo but then Nathan was like "We can squeeze a few more in!" Presenter guy was over ridden, up went the hammer again and HAMMER CAME IN CLUTCH! Nathan went "Last question, make it a firefly one, Go!" I shit you not, a guy with a mic BOLTED to me and went "You with the hammer! Stand up!"

Up I stood! Hammer on my shoulder and my first words were "Whaddup?!"

FOR GODS SAKE ADDER!!!

Anyway I then proceeded to go "I have Thor's hammer but who on the firefly crew would be able to lift Thors hammer?"

And they all went "Ooooooh good question"

Nathan said "It won't be Mal, he's not pure, he's a rogue" They also ruled out Jayne etc, however they all seemingly agreed it would be Simon and I went "Hey what about Kaylee?" And Nathan's response was "Kaylee's not pure!" And Jewel was like "Why not?! All she did was have sex!"

I almost caused a punch up *Evil laughter*

Now what I didn't mention, but I will now, is that Nathan was handing out bits of his script from the Rookie and a sticker, to those who asked a question. Now because I was the VERY last person, didn't expect anything but the guy who gave me the mic, ran down to Nathan and was like "Do you have anymore script bits?" And Nathan nodded his head, handed it to the guy and pointed AT ME before leaving. Turned out Nathan saw the hammer too and indicated to the guy to run to me! I didn't notice that but that was what this runner told me and I was like "HELL YEAH!"

I got some of his script!

I had a freaking amazing time too...Made friends, met some cool people saw some amazing costumes but the one that stood out for me was this guy dressed as Odin

All the leather, he hand stitched himself!

[ishouldsleepbut]

Pt 2 of my kinnes + appreciation of Frances Janvier

*This contains spoilers for Radio Silence by Alice Oseman and it's also a long post sorry*

So I just finished Radio Silence by Alice Oseman (which is fucking amazing, pls go read it if you haven't), and ooh boy. I got myself another kin. This time the lucky one is Frances Janvier.

At first, Frances seems like you typical overachiever: head girl, A's on every test, almost no hobbies (unless you count studying) and she wants to go to a prestigious college (this time it's Cambridge). Secretly though, she's an artist who obsesses over and posts fanart about her favorite podcast, Universe City. Over the course of the story, we see Frances works her ass off trying to get into Cambridge for English Lit. She says when she's not doing homework, she feels like she's wasting time (I know that feeling). I'm gonna quote a line from the book that really hit me hard.

Context: Frances is on the train to Cambridge for her interviews. "Everything I'd ever done at school had come down to this... What else were you supposed to do when you got the best grades in the class, without fail, every single year? Why would I waste an opportunity like this?". Frances continuously reiterates that if she doesn't get into Cambridge, all of her hard work and studying a subject that she doesn't even LIKE will be for nothing.

And like, as a so-called "smart kid", that hit fucking hard. It genuinely feels like your whole personality is just getting good grades which is a problem because school doesn't last forever. No one in their twenties remembers what they got on their 7th-grade math finals. And so when gifted kids like me take a step back, they realize "Oh shit, I don't know who I am anymore". Because when so much of your life revolves around being perfect over and over again, taking every opportunity to get higher academic achievements, you forget that it's ok to be human. It's ok to not get everything right, it's ok to do other stuff instead of studying, and it's ok to fail. And that is such a hard lesson to learn because it has been ingrained in our brains by either ourselves or the people around us that failing is the worst thing you can do. Just… reading Frances break down when she found out she didn't get accepted to Cambridge… I cried. Like actually cried. (God this book is so good, seriously, go read it.)

I also want to talk about Frances' relationship with the podcast Universe City and fandom stuff in general. Frances is a huge fan of this podcast and she even regularly posts fanart of it on Tumblr. No one knows about this though, as Frances is scared of people finding out. She's afraid people will think she's just a fandom-obsessed weirdo. Frances even feels like there are two parts to her: School Frances and Real Frances. This ties back into the whole "being perfect" thing. I feel like a lot of gifted kids relate to this (read I relate to this) because you feel like you have to be correct and perfect all the time. You can't ever show your "weird" side because then people might not take you seriously (especially when you're a racial, ethnic, or gender minority) or they'll judge you for it. Like I'm in a lot of fandoms. I read fanfiction. I make edits and fanart. Hell, I've even watched those gatcha life "characters react to themselves" videos. And a lot of the stuff I've mentioned is so stigmatized that I feel like a lot of us have just taken to hiding it. I honestly don't tell a lot of my friends about the fanfics I read or what ships I like or my headcanons for specific characters. If I share those things with you, that means I really trust you (...or I don't know you and I'm posting it on Tumblr).

And honestly, that's why I love Tumblr because I can just talk about my silly headcanons for x character and gush over some cute fanart. If someone sees and likes my posts, great. I'm glad you liked it. But if not that's ok.

Well, congrats for making it to the end of this hella-long post. Thanks for listening to me ramble for a little bit about some personal stuffs. Pls read radio silence if you haven't, it's so good. It and Frances need more appreciation because they are both so awesome.

[mangodestroyer]

I'm beginning to think there are too many ways you can interpret every little detail in Good Omens.

I can see so many interpretations for one thing that honestly sound pretty legit, and then the author or some actor says their own part about it. But then there can still be multiple interpretations over what was said.

I just saw a post talking about how Crowley isn't "actually a snake, but a demon." As stated by Neil Gaiman many times. So... he just chooses to be very snaky? I genuinely thought he was just like that by nature. And yeah, there have been lots of theories over why he's a snake and obviously there can still be meaning derived from that.

However, I still think the idea of that just being his God given, permanent form is much more exciting. So he's still a snek by nature in my fics. That's just my personal preference for the character.

As much as I can appreciate meta and the author's word, I guess I sometimes find myself being that annoying fanfic writer who wants to play by their own rule book. It's not even like I have a problem with the canon. It's really just my weird hang up about world building and wanting "limitations" on characters. I prefer if characters have a bunch of things about their identity that they're just stuck with. Which I guess, for the most part is Crowley being a demon. And having to deal with Hell politics. And being a supernatural being. But... I want more than that!

Does this make any sense? Yeah, I get it. It's just how Good Omens is. Angels and Demons do seem to have more leeway with what they can do (even if they have their own limitations and politics to deal with). There's nothing wrong with it. It's just a personal preference, like I said. Maybe it comes from my own life experience of being a human who's encountered LOTS of limitations and road blocks. And just having to find ways to work with what I have. And somehow I just want a supernatural being to be more relatable to my lame ass mortal self. I know, fantasy and magic are all about exceeding the bounds of human experience and "escaping" our mundane world. I kind of just want it to feel... obtainable?

Kind of like how in Harry Potter, only a tiny portion of the world's population has a genetic condition that gives them magical powers and the rest of us have to be boring ass muggles who can never know or experience that, I was never a huge fan of that aspect of the story.

And somehow I went from talking about multiple interpretations of GO to going on a tangent about purposely ignoring a small detail about canon.

[terribletoonietuesday]

Terror Toons 4 (2023)

Terror Toons 4 (2023)Due to several reasons I have not been doing reviews as often as I used to but I needed to write this one. I NEEDED to write it. Let me set things up with expectations. I was a big fan of the first film literally 20 years ago. Not because I thought it was amazing but because it was just shockingly silly , bizzare and that kind of nonsense that would shock normie film fans. It was a lot of fun to show people just for their reactions. Then parts 2 and 3 came and went and I was not too much of a fan. It was a bit of the same and just didn' do anything for me and I'm sure would be too weird for those pre mentioned "normies"… but.. but then came part 4. I was told it was an anthology and the post covid world of low budget anthologies don't exactly excite me anymore. So I went into this worried but only 30 seconds in, things changed… forever.The opening of this film explodes into visual overload and insanity so fast it feels as if Horonamus Bosch met Terry Gilliam in the digital age. it felt like that magnavox commercial where the screen literally exploded in your face. Then the movies starts and the screaming begins. The first short starts and gives us a mixed slash warped origin of the classic Terror Toon villains. It's so much a step up in concept , feeling, pacing and technical excellence then previous with a darker , scarier atmosphere. Imagine watching Adam Wests Batman one week and then seeing a multimillion dollar Batman movie the next week.So not to give any spoilers I will just say it feels like Alex De le Iglesia directed the hell scene in Bill and Teds bogus journey . Douglas Epps take on the less cartoony yet just as insane Dr Carnage is amazing. The killer gorilla Max Assassin is legit scary now. But it's the new sweet and innocent yet completely terrifying character Derrick or was it Eric that we meet that will change your life.I won't explain anything about him but you will know him when you see him. We get several other shorts but they definitely come in second to the first short however they are needed. Brinke Stevens stars and directs a short that is a much more sensible short that may have been fine on its own but felt a bit out of place, again only because the rest of the show was so wild. Brinke had made this short before thinking of connecting it to Terror Toons 4 , I'm pretty sure. It's a nice mellow out and does get us more Linnea Quickly and Debbie Rochon. Hell the cameos in this are wild.The third and fourth shorts come at you wild and fast giving no mercy. After the second short I was literally saying to myself "wait a Joe Castro film with no sexual symbolism, that's weird." but then the short The heads of Mr Switch comes at you and picks up for sexual lost time. This short is shocking, hilarious and ends so quickly you also want to know what happens next so badly. The most original villain in eons, all that and oh my god, Lizzy Borden is back.The final short gives us a 21 gun salute and takes us into the apocalypse . Oh look it's Rob Rhine of Girls and Corpses magazine , but of course he is here again. More cameos from more scream queen and b movie legends than you can shake a stick at in this octane charge non stop visceral explosion into madness as if Aphex Twin remade Monty Python's Meaning of Life.This is a huge achievement for the B movie world and even for those normie film nerds that may not understand this film , they will still be effected and never forget this facedive diving board launch into madness. So yeah I loved it. I'm exhausted.

[fouralignments]

Do you hate Shaw and Apocalypse equally or one more than another?

The X-Men Films have always created villains that could exist in real life your Senator Kellys, Trasks, William Strykers, Warren Worthington II theses motherfuckers exist. The Foxverse always tended toward realism, which isn't grimdark, it was more of mutants and a bit of advanced tech was all that was extraordinary. When compared to DC and MCU; without the distraction of aliens, other superheroes (though I got to admit Sam Ramini's spiderman could exist as it is similarly grounded; though that might just be an effect of being produced in the same decades and subject to the same trends); so mutants could be highlighted and doesn't need to justify itself as a phemameoun, so the story could focus on characters and thus be driven by them.

In a way Shaw was a twist villain, up and until that general getting exploded, again up to that point we hadn't had a true mutant villains. yes I know Magneto was the villain in X-Men, but I would the true villain US gov and the mutant registration act that forced Erik's hand.

This motherfucker could very well exist; maybe I'm just weird I took a deep dive into how and the why authoritarianism happens, read me some Robert A. Paxton; hell I even took a class on Democratic Backsliding; I'm a big fan of Hannah Arendt; so, I get the implications of his character. That's what makes him so fucking scary. I fucking hate him. Erik cannot kill this guy enough.

In my book, he's always a villain and deserves no sympathy and will be written as such.

Now, moving on to Apocalypse, what I hate about him is how he is written. I'm going to restate one of my points, I've been making about his character. En Sabah Nur should have been an outside-context type villain, it was hinted in the movie, but given enough time. It would so easy to justify, not so much the Foxverse seeming to copy off of the MCU; however, XM:A was indeed a character piece despite how deluded; this movie desperately focus and a better driving core story. I liked the outcome of Charles's character specially less the journey and the repeated plot beats for both Erik, Raven; they as characters weren't moving forward and changing.

Unlike like DP which had to break its own back in the mental gymnastics to justify itself which crap storytelling in and of itself and should not be done; like if you have break your own fucking magic system in order to make your story work, go back to the drawing broad!

Anyhow, for one ancient Egyptian did erase records by defacing monuments and images of people they perceived as traitors, and being a false god would be so, so the information to uncover is not there and lost to history. Then the children of the atom mutant hypothesis has been established from First Class not that science is wrong, however the scientific community hasn't been presented with new information that contradicts or challenges their assumptions; they have to explain something that fits within the facts of the paradigm. So given that fact, they would even consider the possibility of ancient mutant existing and let alone living until the 20th century. En Sabah Nur would be as huge paradigm shift that would leave the world scrambling for answers and how to defeat him.

One of the reasons I hate DP is that nobody fucking comments on the bloodily miracle of aliens landing on Earth!

But I can't bring myself to hate on Apocalypse. How Oscar Isaac plays Apocalypse is just so fun! Soft spoken, but yet can be so over the top and hammy. Maybe its because of Oscar Isaac and how much he was wasted in this role and the god awful make up he was in that did no favors for him.

En Sabah Nur could have easily won the movie and recruited so many more mutants.

Like I know I can write En Sabah Nur better than Hollywood. It could have been so cool if Sabah Nur actually challenged Charles and Erik on leadership and being good parents, where the stakes would matter like getting Mystique and Peter on his side. Isaac can pull of of soft dad roles. The writer's had the perfect set-up for Mystique and Peter, for Raven/Mystique she never asked to be the 'hero' of mutantkind nor does she believe the lie of a world that doesn't exist, ok cool turn her into a rouge or villain; with Peter, break into the Pentagon could have gotten him the attention of William Stryker where he was tortured and found out to be Erik's kid and learned about that and just felt betrayed by Charles and Erik who completely forgot about him and Sabah Nur is the one who saved him, Peter feels indebted to him. Also, Even Peters playing a villain and En Sabah Nur slotting himself in a fatherly figure to Quicksilver.

it would have been a great contrast to other X-Men villains and to Erik and Charles themselves, where it was a matter of survival and protecting other mutants and just the world. Now it so much more personal to the heroes, it challenging their philosophy, leadership and who they are, not really seen until First Class, which was more about finding who they are. Apocalypse is the mantle in which they must test themselves against, but also fight those that they love. Holy shit that would have made an amazing movie.

What I like about En Sabah Nur as a character is that I have so much creative freedom with him and I can take him in so many directions.

[mirrorofprinces]

ao3 wrapped ask: 3, 5, 6, 12, 17, 18, 19, 20, 28, 29, 30!

answered 17, 28, 29 <3

3. What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)? i thinkkkk i can't stop and look the other way. i knew for sure i wanted to play with infidelity kink (and my original idea was actually for the infidelity to be real lol) but i chickened out and just made it a roleplay, and even clearly tagged it as such, but i'm proud of how i pulled it off in a way that a bunch of people commented saying they forgot or didn't realize it was roleplay hehe. maybe i'll write actual infidelity one day! who knows

5. What work of yours got more feedback than you expected? god, that's gotta be give it to ya like you never had it. i truly didn't expect the response it's gotten because there was already a super popular pornstar AU fic, so i knew my second cake would just be a humble offering in comparison, but i think a lot of people really liked the way i wrote them here where i had fun exploring their personalities outside of mafia canon.

6. Favorite title you used? oh, i hate all my titles, i literally don't think of a title until 30 seconds before posting, and then i end up using whatever song i was listening to while writing...

12. How many WIP’s do you have in your docs for next year? jesus christ. you don't wanna know. it's in the double digits for sure lmao ><

18. The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year? i don't know that it's been one character consistently in my posted fics, but i can admit that the "character" in my rpf WIPs that's been giving me hell is apo. he is so hard to write!

19. What’s one pairing you want to explore next year? i guess i can technically say mileapo since i haven't finished or posted any mileapo fics yet. but another kp ship i want to try is (unpopular opinion alert) vegasporsche. hear me out!! they might suck together in the series, but they have a different dynamic in the novel, and their relationship is more genuine (not FULLY genuine but like, more than in the show lol, like they become friends and vegas develops actual feelings for porsche and everything). but i just don't know if i'll ever actually write them because i would need the perfect idea or AU and it hasn't come to me yet.

20. Which work of yours have you reread the most? probably down like my head on your chest, because i THINK it's my fav la fortissimo fic. i'm just really happy with the scenes i chose to hornify, plus the hallway-semi-public-masturbation bit was a huge turning point for porsche where he was given full control of the situation for once and he still chose to submit. you don't really get this because it's in porsche pov, but from that point on in the series, you notice kinn ends up "playing with porsche's emotions" a lot more (ie. having him drive his twinks home, fucking a lot more escorts, shutting down conversations about their feelings) and that's actually kinn poorly coping with porsche's unwavering trust by trying to prove to himself that he doesn't feel anything for porsche, which we all know is a BIG FAT LIE. but anyways. no one reads into the story this deeply, i know you're all just here for the smut <3

30. Biggest surprise while writing this year? my biggest surprise is that i can write again LMAO. before kp brainrot, i went like a full 2 calendar years without writing anything because i was so uninspired, plus constantly comparing myself to the thousands of better writers in the huge fandom i was in at the time. kp also has incredible writers but it's a much smaller fandom and i feel a lot less self-conscious posting here. i remember in my old fandom, i literally couldn't even tweet about an idea i had that i wanted to write without getting a dozen replies from people saying "there's already a fic like that", which is like, ok, i know none of my ideas were especially original, but getting that response constantly made me feel like my writing just wasn't welcome. oh well. with kp being a new and small fandom, nothing feels "overdone" yet, so i'm having a lot of fun in this playground!

[daryfromthefuture]

😈🛒✨🛠⛔🙋‍♀️💖❌ 🤗🤯 for the ask thing (sorry I got a lot of questions!)

oh god, that's a lot! let's see what we have here

😈has there been a point in a story where you did something just to be playfully mean to your readers?

oh, all the time. many of my reader friends open my next chapter with great caution because i tend to be a little mean to my main characters sometimes (without warning, too). sometimes i also like to make already pretty bad conditions even worse for fun <3 i love my readers

🛒what are common things you incorporate in your fics? themes, feels, scenes, imagery, etc.

at this point it's pretty much impossible to find a fic of mine that doesn't involve a doc and marty found family trope, and i love when they hug, so that also does happen all the time. it's a crime that they only had two hugs in the entire trilogy. bob gale, what the hell?

aside from that...emotional hurt, fluff. friendship. these things. i'm not a huge fan of romance, so i tend to stay away from that (except if it's necessary for plot purposes)

✨give you and your writing a compliment. go on now. you know you deserve it.

awww. that's sweet. let me think.

as much as it frustrates me sometimes, my writing is pretty solid in english for it being my third language. i sometimes reread my stuff and think that this is a style i'd also gladly read.

🛠️what tools/programs/apps do you use to write?

i use libreoffice and google docs for the most part! but if i'm in complete writers block, this website helps me a lot! it actually makes me write lmao

⛔do you have a fic you started, but scraped?

yep. i had a bttf prequel fic i wanted to write, but i eventually scraped it because the plot was pretty lame. also my brain was overtaken by other projects that matter more to me now, so it's not a big loss ;)

🙋‍♀️do any irl people know you write fanfic?

in my irl friend group, i usually disguise fanfic as "stories that go nowhere" instead of admitting that i post them for the enitre internet to discover and read. some friends know that it's specifically fanfic, though. my family knows nothing and i'd like for it to stay that way lol

💖what made you start writing?

personally, i've been loving to write since forever. i used to write short stories for myself, up until i discovered fanfic when i was 10. my drive to write fanfiction usually comes from my love for fandoms and characters, and the urge to add my own touch to already existing stories and put those characters into interesting scenarios. you can do so many things while keeping the characters you know and love, and that's really fun!

❌what's a trope you will never write?

y/n or oc x canon. i appreciate everyone who managed to insert y/n or oc into canon so well that the story still makes sense and is well written, but personally i could never do that. the already existing characters bring me enough inspiration to come up with stories, and i'm perfectly content with writing for them.

🤗what advice would you give to give to new fanfic writers that are just getting started?

don't be afraid to start! things like "but others are better than me" shouldn't stop you. yes, others are better than you. they will always be others who are more successful and have a different writing style that you may think as being better. but you will improve, and be proud of your own work. fanfic is something you write for yourself and also for free, it's your time you're investing and it's perfectly fine to be proud of the stories you tell! and there always will be people who genuinely enjoy what you write :)

wow that was a lot

🤯what's a genre you struggle with as a writer? (ex. romance, action, etc.)?

while i've slowly gotten a hang on romance, i stuggle with action scenes (simply because i tend to focus on emotion rather than plot). also horror? angst, yes. horror? no, nope. don't know how to write that.

thank you so much for the ask!

[reevezs]

No one noticed anything, but there wasn't much to notice. Aside from their brief glances in each other's direction, not necessarily meeting their eyes, Chiara and Eric were great at hiding from others and playing their roles. Suddenly, Chiara's date's jokes were funny, his arm so huggable. Veronica and Eric hadn't looked so in love in such a long time, either.

Chiara's words couldn't leave his head; their exchange on the balcony was short but intense and now Eric wanted answers to his questions. If their main goal was to stop thinking why couldn't he stop thinking about their... affair? Why something so fun turned into a battle of "who would show the other they were having the greatest time ever wins" and why it seemed to fool everyone else... but them?

At first, he felt like he was winning whenever Veronica put her arms around his neck and pressed an affectionate kiss to his lips, or stroked his arm with pride. But it was childish and he wasn't winning anything; the sight of Chiara with that guy was enough for Eric to realize his hypocrisy and how it failed him.

It was a game he didn't want to lose, feeling competitive and trying to prove he didn't care. He didn't have to explain himself to Chiara. He was a shit husband but a husband nonetheless. They weren't dating, and the nature of their relationship was (or supposed to be) simple and uncomplicated. Is that why Eric's eyes were on her again as he asked himself the same boring question of the night: what the hell was their conversation really about?

He started to understand that, an answer to the question sort of writing itself whenever he saw Chiara's date's hand travel a little too south, his face a bit too close to hers. Soon, he didn't want him anywhere near her, jealousy like this was rather uncommon for Eric, but when mixed with a bit of booze, it turned far more powerful than common sense...

*

He couldn't approach Chiara, he would never make a scene... But nobody said he couldn't talk to her date. Men liked football, and they loved meeting their idols. Talking to a famous football player was about as suspicious as taking a picture with Mickey Mouse in Disneyland.

"Oh my god, I can't believe my eyes! My lucky number 6, Mr. O'Connor!"

Eric knew nothing about football and found it so boring, he didn't even use important football games as an excuse to hang out with friends and get drunk. However, he did know how to google a guy and memorize a few dates, numbers, and little facts about him. It didn't differ much from studying for an important History exam, and he used to ace those with ease.

"Baby, come here and say hi," he told Veronica, holding out his hand so she would join him, and grinned at Chiara's date. His fan number one. He didn't even look at Chiara, pretending he didn't know her, or at his wife - of course, she had no idea what was going on. Since when was Eric a fan of this guy? But maybe it was a big deal, maybe he was a valuable connection in the world where important people knowing even more important people were someone's to be or not to be. Veronica gave them both the sweetest smile she could muster and played along, taking Eric's hand.

"Damn, I'm sorry if I'm making a fool of myself, but I'm a huge fan. I'm Eric Sanders, and this is my beautiful wife Veronica."

Chiara’s lips curled into a knowing smirk as she glanced down at Eric’s hand on her arm before lifting her gaze back to his. Her eyes glimmered with playful mischief, and the tension between them was palpable. She let out a soft, almost mocking chuckle, tilting her head slightly.

“You’re right, Eric. I do follow my own rules,” she said, her voice smooth and dripping with sarcasm. She leaned in just a fraction closer, her breath warm against his ear. "Fine... But you know I love playing by my rules.."

Her eyes flickered back toward her date, who was laughing obnoxiously and obliviously with the other guests. Chiara didn’t miss a beat, slipping out of Eric’s light grip and sauntering back to her date with the same confidence she always carried.

She pressed herself into the curve of her date’s arm, glancing back at Eric with a sly, almost taunting smile before turning her attention to her drunken companion.

She let her laughter mix with the crowd’s, her eyes briefly catching Eric’s once more, as if daring him to make the next move

Game on.

[baekhvuns]

FUCKING HELL THE APP HAS BEEN GLITCHY FOR THE PAST 3 DAYS BUT I FINALLY MADE IT HERE

God, the news about Moonbin really punched me in the gut, I can't believe this... 💔😢😢😢😢 I wasn't a huge Astro fan, but I liked them, I was sad when Rocky left and now this... so heartbreaking. I went through a few situations like that in kpop, but it's always absolutely devastating. I went to his memorial yesterday 💔

Sorry if I don't reply to everything, I'm on the train half awake </3

What's up in the Baeksussy land? 👀 should I ask about your Yunho fic? 😅

Sjajhajshahagaha "RM only played well, because our players were injured" lmao of course you had to say that 😆. what n*zis?! 😭 the history of Catalonia and Spain is extremely vile and complicated and tbh I don't know every detail, but what is this bullshit, I had no idea until you told me.

Honestly football isn't that serious, why are they doing this :/

I think Leclerc got a ricochet because of the Ferrari team, idk if he had a scandal or whatever, I think I remember seeing something or maybe it wasn't him lol, but lots of people don't support him I noticed that. Hope the Lewis movie will be decent

Ofc Seonghwa is hot and pretty regardless, but he's even hotter with long hair, the baldness is ok if I can only see one side of his head 😭 but I'm glad to see there are more and more undercut dislikers, I know we're so brave for it, because Seonghwa loves his hedgehog head, but sorry 💔 at least dye your hair if you wanna be bald. And mushroom Hwa, sigh, why must I suffer so much :( everyone who saw blonde Seonghwa i'm at your door 💀💀💀💀 can't believe I missed it. His hair better grow at least 5cm before May.

Stop don't talk about Dozen cause I legit saw ads for him??? But seriously, can that bitch ass idiot Chris Lee make an announcement about him. SuperM isn't happening anytime soon I think, but I need him away from WayV. No Taeyong, no Taeyeon, no Seulgi. I lost by not going to the Dojaejung premiere

YY is quite shy actually, shameless but shy lol. Ten, Kun and Xiaojun looked at us up close when they were passing by and I just 🧍🏽‍♀️anyways I'm seeing them twice next week, but before that I'm going to see Atz though my seat isn't the best and I'll be separated from my friends, so that's not great lol

I won't survive wet Hwa. Kinda glad I won't be in Japan then. But they could go to Waterbomb Korea instead 🙄

I bought some NCT dolls, got a lot of pcs, and 2 shirts. Each member had their lil corner, it was a pretty cute set up. Another money grab from SM, but an adorable one. Aaaaaand I went to the Teezmon pop up and it was carnage out there, almost had to fight for Winklemon! I don't have time to queue on different days, so I sacrificed myself, it was worth it cause LOOK AT HIM, LOOK AT BOTH OF THEM https://twitter.com/nobodylikehwa/status/1649318208069836805?t=TLUM-4UlbakB3A6Pty4TBA&s=19

Ok beautiful man... https://twitter.com/thingshwa/status/1649675607578386433?t=sMRx1xkYH0oDKxSRSan4zA&s=19 guess the hair isn't that bad, but it could've been better. But seeing the setlist for that festival I'm glad I chose Taemin over it ajsjjababshajwjsjs don't they have other songs, it was literally LOVEsome festival but they had to perform SMN and The Real for the millionth time, I sleep 💤

FINALLY THEY STOPPED BEING HWAPHOBIC AND RELEASED THE VIDEO. But Also??? MBC I WILL MURDER YOU https://twitter.com/sunshine_1117/status/1650758031624536064?t=uM8gBXsy1JvryCcx95IxWg&s=19

OK NOW ABOUT LEE TAEMIN I WAS SCREAMING SHAKING CRYING HE WAS SO ODOROBOL AND HE'S BLONDE!!! AND SHINEE ANNIVERSARY EVENTS SOON?! AND AN ALBUM TOO AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CAN'T BELIEVE I WITNESSED HIM IN THE FLESH AFTER 10000 YEARS AND SHINEE FAN MEETING TOO I NEED TO EXTEND MY STAY OR SOMETHING 😭😭😭😭

GOD IS HERE https://twitter.com/iheartshinee_/status/1649652153051656192?t=pgNdOdJ1qqF44fRo3XpwZw&s=19

Thoughts.... https://twitter.com/thinkingabtpsh/status/1649982703133917184?t=XO-Eh9icKw8N2BRjlluZQQ&s=19 the only football player I respect tbh

Stop!!! https://twitter.com/sunshine_1117/status/1650752854209208320?t=bt9_qH1LFxJB7OEPNDBmRg&s=19 and HOLY FUCKING?!?!?? https://twitter.com/pshsource/status/1651063478076198921?t=-7pBj-QaZOAMvmC7leNCjA&s=19

2006... if he's an uncle then I'm a grandma https://twitter.com/minjaeries/status/1650826458313662464?t=_sfGCe2HyJO0qXndMyR9aQ&s=19 - I went to the Teezmon shop with a few ppl including my friend's sister and her friend, they're 17 and so fucking weird, never felt such huge generation gap. Hope to never see them again <3 - DV 💖

hello!!!

FUCKING HELL THE APP HAS BEEN GLITCHY FOR THE PAST 3 DAYS BUT I FINALLY MADE IT HERE

IT LITERALLY HAS BEEN THE FUCKING UPDATES AND EVERYTHING COULD NOT EVEN SEE THE TEXT BC OF IT GNWMFJWK ANYWAY HOW ARE U

God, the news about Moonbin really punched me in the gut, I can't believe this... 💔😢😢😢😢 I wasn't a huge Astro fan, but I liked them, I was sad when Rocky left and now this... so heartbreaking. I went through a few situations like that in kpop, but it's always absolutely devastating. I went to his memorial yesterday 💔

it really did no 😭😭 i was a moderate fan esp after always you era… after san dropped his cover and then, it all kind of repeated almost,,,, i still do not believe it honestly, like just like that???? how come??? it’s unreal to me,, it really is always, always devastating and leaves such a mark man,, it really is heartbreaking 😭😭😭 you did?? did u perhaps see the shawol who left candies there,, on the letter she wrote if moonbin met jonghyun and if they both talked and if they are travelling and that they should stick by each other’s side 😭😭😭 hoping his sister is doing well i can’t believe how much pain she’s going thru, gone too young

Sorry if I don't reply to everything, I'm on the train half awake </3 /// What's up in the Baeksussy land? 👀 should I ask about your Yunho fic? 😅

no worries! baeksussy land has been watching older romcoms! rn as im writing this im watching monster in law 😭😭 …yunho,, yeah i VFKWHDKWJDKWBDK see i was writing it and i was gonna continue onto the nsfw area and then the news came and it just doesn’t feel right to write anything atm so i have it on hold!

Sjajhajshahagaha "RM only played well, because our players were injured" lmao of course you had to say that 😆. what n*zis?! 😭 the history of Catalonia and Spain is extremely vile and complicated and tbh I don't know every detail, but what is this bullshit, I had no idea until you told me. /// Honestly football isn't that serious, why are they doing this :/

LMFAOOOO ITS TRUE HEY PEDRI WAS OUT, DEMBELE IDK IF HE HAS LEGS ATP, DE JONG WAS OUT ????? rm karma 🤚🏻benz kroos and modric next season last season <///3 yEAAAH UHUH THEY DID THAT. I DONT EVEN KNOW WHATS WRONG WITH THEM??? THEYRE LIKE REWRITING HISTORY FOR FOOTBALL??? ARE THEY MAD???? they did this bc barca’s president said that rm has historically been favoured, and they made a whole video out of it, got the govt involved and damaged relationships 😭😭😭 ultimate rm L,, LIKE THIS OVER FOOTBALL??? it’s really not that serious wHAT

now…..man city v arsenal 😶😶😶 how are u holding up anon

I think Leclerc got a ricochet because of the Ferrari team, idk if he had a scandal or whatever, I think I remember seeing something or maybe it wasn't him lol, but lots of people don't support him I noticed that. Hope the Lewis movie will be decent

i think his only scandal is the one where he didn’t kneel for the blm thing, idk much about it but twt f1 stan’s blew it up and the media were trying to frame him as a racist for not kneeling and it got pretty bad bc it became a topic about who was kneeling and who isn’t instead of the actual discussion, was super messy all around !!! other than that i think ppl mostly just pity him bc his prime years are being wasted at ferarri,,, mostly everyone likes him bc he’s quite consistent w driving and is down to earth at his ripe age, max is quite disliked 1. bc of his dad, 2. bc of him on the track 3. anger issues. the bigger scandal was with mazepin who apparently was involved w putin somehow??? he’s the one EVERYONE hates, no question, it created a big BIG scandal, he was annoying on track anyways so deserved but he’s really disliked universally 🔫 hope so too!! much needed f1 movie finally!!!

Ofc Seonghwa is hot and pretty regardless, but he's even hotter with long hair, the baldness is ok if I can only see one side of his head 😭 but I'm glad to see there are more and more undercut dislikers, I know we're so brave for it, because Seonghwa loves his hedgehog head, but sorry 💔 at least dye your hair if you wanna be bald. And mushroom Hwa, sigh, why must I suffer so much :( everyone who saw blonde Seonghwa i'm at your door 💀💀💀💀 can't believe I missed it. His hair better grow at least 5cm before May.

hear me out, long hair hwa at the waterbomb festival 🤚🏻😳🤚🏻 no cause i looked up photos and even that tread, why was the literally bald from the back during wonderland era 🤨 LIKE STRAIGHT UP BALDING BRKQHDKWHCKS ????? PREPARING FOR ENLISTMENT??? hedgehog head STOP 😭😭

Stop don't talk about Dozen cause I legit saw ads for him??? But seriously, can that bitch ass idiot Chris Lee make an announcement about him. SuperM isn't happening anytime soon I think, but I need him away from WayV. No Taeyong, no Taeyeon, no Seulgi. I lost by not going to the Dojaejung premiere

NO WAY???? THERES ADS FOR THAT MAN??? 🤨 u know even if those allegations were fake, im never forgetting what he did to baek 🔫🔫 dO not care that was actually so painful to watch, forever a dozen for ever a 12,,, CHRIS LEE NEED TO LEAVE AND TAKE THAT 12 W HIM !!!!!!!! he contributed nothing in terms of voice to superm or wayv, really, most of it was carried by the other members repeatedly ??? I SWEAR NOT GOING TO THE DODAEJUNG PREMIER WAS UR FIRST MISTAKE

YY is quite shy actually, shameless but shy lol. Ten, Kun and Xiaojun looked at us up close when they were passing by and I just 🧍🏽‍♀️anyways I'm seeing them twice next week, but before that I'm going to see Atz though my seat isn't the best and I'll be separated from my friends, so that's not great lol /// I won't survive wet Hwa. Kinda glad I won't be in Japan then. But they could go to Waterbomb Korea instead 🙄

shamelessly shy 😭😭😭 oh he’s chaotic evil 😭😭😭 JFBWNDWJFKW STARSTRUCK WERE U DNDNDN AAAAA BOTH ATEEZ AND WAYV??? anon how will u survive wet hwa, ALONE????

I bought some NCT dolls, got a lot of pcs, and 2 shirts. Each member had their lil corner, it was a pretty cute set up. Another money grab from SM, but an adorable one. Aaaaaand I went to the Teezmon pop up and it was carnage out there, almost had to fight for Winklemon! I don't have time to queue on different days, so I sacrificed myself, it was worth it cause LOOK AT HIM, LOOK AT BOTH OF THEM https://twitter.com/nobodylikehwa/status/1649318208069836805?t=TLUM-4UlbakB3A6Pty4TBA&s=19

anon u better pack ur suitcases tight bc im in my way for those shirts, SM MONEY GRAB WORKS WONDERS UNFORTUNATELY,,, AAAAAA DID U GET ALL THE WINKLEMON’S STOPPP THATS SO CUTE GET OUT 😭😭 KQ FOLLOWING SM’S MONEY GRABS

Ok beautiful man... https://twitter.com/thingshwa/status/1649675607578386433?t=sMRx1xkYH0oDKxSRSan4zA&s=19 guess the hair isn't that bad, but it could've been better. But seeing the setlist for that festival I'm glad I chose Taemin over it ajsjjababshajwjsjs don't they have other songs, it was literally LOVEsome festival but they had to perform SMN and The Real for the millionth time, I sleep 💤

bro is majestic, a rockstar 🤚🏻 the wet hair look is prepping us for the waterbomb festival fbwnfbsn NO BC WHY WAS THE SETLIST ALL HYPE bring out time for love it’s that song’s turn !!!!! can’t believe im saying this, tired of them performing smn and the real, u got so much more pls use it 😭😭😭🤲🏻

FINALLY THEY STOPPED BEING HWAPHOBIC AND RELEASED THE VIDEO. But Also??? MBC I WILL MURDER YOU https://twitter.com/sunshine_1117/status/1650758031624536064?t=uM8gBXsy1JvryCcx95IxWg&s=19

FBMWFWKBDWAMJDKS THE AGGRESSION THE WAY I SCREAMED AT GHAT 😭😭😭 SAW WHOLE HASTAG DEMANDING KQ TO DO BETTER,, the not giving seonghwa promo bc he’s ‘naturally popular’ oKAY??? MAKE HIM MORE POPULAR 😭😭😭

OK NOW ABOUT LEE TAEMIN I WAS SCREAMING SHAKING CRYING HE WAS SO ODOROBOL AND HE'S BLONDE!!! AND SHINEE ANNIVERSARY EVENTS SOON?! AND AN ALBUM TOO AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA CAN'T BELIEVE I WITNESSED HIM IN THE FLESH AFTER 10000 YEARS AND SHINEE FAN MEETING TOO I NEED TO EXTEND MY STAY OR SOMETHING 😭😭😭😭

YES I WAS WAITING FOR THEIF BRMQBDKWHDWKDHWKDHKW THE LEE TAE MIN HOW THE HELL DID U SURVIVE, HOW WAS HE, HOW DID HE LOOK LIKE, WAS HE OKAY, WAS HE COMFY WAS HE SINGING OKAY WAS HE COMFORTABLE FHAMFJK U NEED TO EXTEND IT IDC IDC U HAVE TO SEE THEM ANON COME ON PLS FBMWBDK

GOD IS HERE https://twitter.com/iheartshinee_/status/1649652153051656192?t=pgNdOdJ1qqF44fRo3XpwZw&s=19 /// Thoughts.... https://twitter.com/thinkingabtpsh/status/1649982703133917184?t=XO-Eh9icKw8N2BRjlluZQQ&s=19 the only football player I respect tbh

STOP I MISSED HIM SO MUCH THAT SMILE 🥹🥹🥹😭😭😭 now, that football player looks like he plays for spurs

and they’re going madrid, if i see them do hala madrid it’s ON SIGHT but the organizers are the kpopflex ppl so 😬

Stop!!! https://twitter.com/sunshine_1117/status/1650752854209208320?t=bt9_qH1LFxJB7OEPNDBmRg&s=19 and HOLY FUCKING?!?!?? https://twitter.com/pshsource/status/1651063478076198921?t=-7pBj-QaZOAMvmC7leNCjA&s=19

oh if he pulls up wearing white. anon. record, zoom do everything u can to CAPTURE IT IDK BUY A CAMERA TAKE PHOTOS FJWKFHWK DO IT FBWNHDKW AND THAT PHOTO COLLECTION??? 😩😩😩 ON MY WAY TO STEAL BC WHAT THE FUCK THAT HAIR

2006... if he's an uncle then I'm a grandma https://twitter.com/minjaeries/status/1650826458313662464?t=_sfGCe2HyJO0qXndMyR9aQ&s=19 - I went to the Teezmon shop with a few ppl including my friend's sister and her friend, they're 17 and so fucking weird, never felt such huge generation gap. Hope to never see them again <3 - DV 💖

LMFAOOOO UNCLE FBWNFJEK 2006?????! WHAAAAAT???? generational gap…anon sometimes i wonder how much older ur are than me, def like a solid 6-7 years 😭😭😭, boomer.

woah woah first rosalia and now this? actually this sounds similar ngl

😭😭😭

WE WON ANON WE WON TOTALLY SPIES REBOOTTT

[blondrichclosetwitch]

At least I didn’t fake it

Oh yeah, all the stuff they tell you about in the movies

But this isn't chocolate boxes and roses

It's dirtier than that

God, I know

Through the week,you love an' laugh an'labour, but on Sunday…don’t forget to love thy neighbour

Just know that I'm always parallel on the other side

Now they come so far and they've waited so long just to end up caught in a dream where everything goes wrong; now you can't walk away from the price you pay

But now I’ve got the running gun blues (fun fact: this is a song about PTSD)

My den of dissolutes my dirty jokes

Chaos

You can have the keys to my house

“…but you know sometimes I’m a liar.”

And you’re unhappy; this is only a guess

Two rites make one wrong

Beautifully oblivious before you were hid inside a stranger you grew into as you learned to disconnect

Buried in the bottom of a canyon in hell but I swear I'll find your light in the middle

The beach and the sea over the friends that we've known and those that we now know and those who we've yet to meet

Over the farmer, over the preacher, over the gambler, over the teacher, over the lawyer, over the voyeur

Happiness is so hard to find

Caught in your own creation

There’s a hole where your heart lies and I can see it with my third eye

I have nothing left

Cause there was someone that I knew before

I let her take all my gold and I have nothing left

Heard she moved into a trailer park

Secret Societies.

(Stood with those girls before)

(The hair in pairs it just got nasty)

(And now those girls are gone)

Someday

We’ve come to the end of that era

—What about Thunder Thighs?

—Oh if I had them here.

“Most of whom are now in jail… “

…or dead.”

“Or dead.”

Bija mantras

I waited for your letter

I have no feeling for you now, now that I know you better

I hide inside of my private prison(SOTD)

All your two-bit friends, they’re shootin' you up with pills

All your two-bit friends, they put you on the stage

They thought it'd be good for a laugh

How could you treat me this way? You know you broke my heart ever since you went away

Well I'm fed up and I need to go out of existence or just down the road forever

thoughts of you every moment, I am used to your being there.

even if I don't see you one day, I wonder like crazy.

“It might be fun to have a kid that I could kick around. “

“..but then again pristine isolation might not be the best idea. “

Teach em how to plant a bomb

Jesus Leslie Jeff Andy Lucy Bunny Marlon Tom Carrie Steve Star

“I’d need a damn computer to keep track of all these names.”

“I hope it’s true what my wife said to me.”

White light - White light gonna drive me out of my mind

Seems to me you only see what people want you to see

Soon we'll be married and raise a family…it was just..

It's time for t and meet the wife

And when they ask us are we happy inside, you’ve got nothing left to hide

Not one resemblance to the man I met

Oh to owe not anyone

Nothing

To be not here, but Here

Amazed to stumble where gods get lost

Je me rapelle debout près du mur

Et je t'embrassais, comme si rien ne tombait

Et la honte était de l'autre côté

On pourra être un héros, pour juste une journée(2nd time heroes played Today)

Those eyes you know I still think of them sometimes but you’re away in Eden and I’m still here, the heathen

Get out of bed, pick up the phone

Time to tell the press

I ain’t jokin, woman

I’ll hold my breath til I hit the floor; eventually I know I’m doomed and then I looked at the ceiling fan and my back started buzzing so I guess that means you fucked with that

While we’re on the subject, this song was huge in 2017. First I was told Jakk, the TR and myself were triplets, and that she seduced him and got pregnant with his child, which is incest right? Anyway. Storyline song.

This is the sound of someone losing the plot…making out that they’re okay when they’re not (SOTD)

I’m guided by a signal in the heavens

Ah, you loved me as a loser but now you’re worried that I just might win

I don’t like what happened to my sister*

Well it’s Father’s Day and everybody’s wounded***

No time for romantic escape and your fluffy heart is ready for rape

I told you twice in our love letter

I want to know, in consideration of the faculties and impulses of the human soul

In consideration of our arrogance

Our radical, primitive irreducible arrogance of reason

We have all overlooked the propensity

The paradoxical something which we may call perverseness

Through its promptings we act for the reason we should not

For certain minds this is absolutely irresistible

It is a primitive impulse

The overwhelming tendency to do wrong for the wrong's sake

We persist in acts because we feel that we should not persist in them

So I want to know

Why persist in action when you know that it's wrong?

I should have quit you a long time ago.

Actually what I think the lemon song is about: once a long time ago, Jakk showed me a picture of blond biting a lemon. It was a cute coquettish picture. But then all of a sudden lemons started being left around my trees, after I learned the symbolism of lemons in witchcraft. Whatevs