#helena dragas

[city-of-ladies]

"The most notable players in Palaiologue politics were the empresses Yolanda-Irene of Montferrat and Anna of Savoy, and on the whole their record is woeful: Yolanda-Irene of Montferrat, second wife of Andronikos II, was unable to comprehend the succession rights of her eldest stepson, Michael IX, and since her husband remained obstinately unmoved by her representations she flounced off with her three sons to Thessalonika where she kept a separate court for many years from 1303 to her death in 1317. From her own domain she issued her own decrees, conducted her own foreign policy and plotted against her husband with the Serbs and Catalans: in mitigation, she had seen her five-year-old daughter married off to the middle-aged Serbian lecher Milutin, and considered that her eldest son John had been married beneath him to a Byzantine aristocrat, Irene Choumnaina. She died embittered and extremely wealthy.

When Yolanda’s grandson Andronikos III died early, leaving a nine-year old son John V and no arrangements for a regent, the empress Anna of Savoy assumed the regency. In so doing she provoked a civil war with her husband’s best friend John Kantakouzenos, and devastated the empire financially, bringing it to bankruptcy and pawning the crown jewels to Venice, as well as employing Turkish mercenaries and, it appears, offering to have her son convert to the church of Rome. Gregoras specifically blames her for the civil war, though he admits that she should not be criticised too heavily since she was a woman and a foreigner. Her mismanagement was not compensated for by her later negotiations in 1351 between John VI Kantakouzenos and her son in Thessalonika, who was planning a rebellion with the help of Stephen Dushan of Serbia. In 1351 Anna too settled in Thessalonika and reigned over it as her own portion of the empire until her death in c. 1365, even minting her own coinage.

These women were powerful and domineering ladies par excellence, but with the proviso that their political influence was virtually minimal. Despite their outspokenness and love of dominion they were not successful politicians: Anna of Savoy, the only one in whose hands government was placed, was compared to a weaver’s shuttle that ripped the purple cloth of empire. But there were of course exceptions. Civil wars ensured that not all empresses were foreigners and more than one woman of Byzantine descent reached the throne and was given quasi-imperial functions by her husband. 

Theodora Doukaina Komnene Palaiologina, wife of Michael VIII, herself had imperial connections as the great-niece of John III Vatatzes, and issued acts concerning disputes over monastic properties during her husband’s reign, even addressing the emperor’s officials on occasion and confirming her husband’s decisions. Nevertheless, unlike other women of Michael’s family who went into exile over the issue, she was forced to support her husband’s policy of church union with Rome, a stance which she seems to have spent the rest of her life regretting. She was also humiliated when he wished to divorce her to marry Constance-Anna of Hohenstaufen, the widow of John III Vatatzes.

Another supportive empress consort can be seen in Irene Kantakouzene Asenina, whose martial spirit came to the fore during the civil war against Anna of Savoy and the Palaiologue ‘faction’. Irene in 1342 was put in charge of Didymoteichos by her husband John VI Kantakouzenos; she also organised the defence of Constantinople against the Genoese in April 1348 and against John Palaiologos in March 1353, being one of the very few Byzantine empresses who took command in military affairs. But like Theodora, Irene seems to have conformed to her husband’s wishes in matters of policy and agreed with his decisions concerning the exclusion of their sons from the succession and their eventual abdication in 1354.

Irene and her daughter Helena Kantakouzene, wife of John V Palaiologos, were both torn by conflicting loyalties between different family members, and Helena in particular was forced to mediate between her ineffectual husband and the ambitions of her son and grandson. She is supposed to have organised the escape of her husband and two younger sons from prison in 1379 and was promptly taken hostage with her father and two sisters by her eldest son Andronikos IV and imprisoned until 1381; her release was celebrated with popular rejoicing in the capital. According to Demetrios Kydones she was involved in political life under both her husband and son, Manuel II, but her main role was in mediating between the different members of her family.

In a final success story, the last Byzantine emperor, Constantine XI, owed his throne to his mother. The Serbian princess Helena Dragash, wife of Manuel II Palaiologos, in the last legitimating political manoeuvre by a Byzantine empress, successfully managed to keep the throne for her son Constantine and fend off the claims of his brother Demetrios. She arranged for Constantine’s proclamation as emperor in the Peloponnese and asserted her right to act as regent until his arrival in the capital from Mistra in 1449.

Despite the general lack of opportunity for them to play a role in politics, Palaiologue imperial women in the thirteenth century found outlets for their independent spirit and considerable financial resources in other ways. They were noted for their foundation or restoration of monastic establishments and for their patronage of the arts. Theodora Palaiologina restored the foundation of Constantine Lips as a convent for fifty nuns, with a small hospital for laywomen attached, as well as refounding a smaller convent of Sts Kosmas and Damian. She was also an active patron of the arts, commissioning the production of manuscripts like Theodora Raoulaina, her husband’s niece. Her typikon displays the pride she felt in her family and position, an attitude typically found amongst aristocratic women.

Clearly, like empresses prior to 1204, she had considerable wealth in her own hands both as empress and dowager. She had been granted the island of Kos as her private property by Michael, while she had also inherited land from her family and been given properties by her son Andronikos. Other women of the family also display the power of conspicuous spending: Theodora Raoulaina used her money to refound St Andrew of Crete as a convent where she pursued her scholarly interests. 

Theodora Palaiologina Angelina Kantakouzene, John Kantakouzenos’s mother, was arguably the richest woman of the period and financed Andronikos III’s bid for power in the civil war against his grandfather. Irene Choumnaina Palaiologina, in name at least an empress, who had been married to Andronikos II’s son John and widowed at sixteen, used her immense wealth, against the wishes of her parents, to rebuild the convent of Philanthropes Soter, where she championed the cause of ‘orthodoxy’ against Gregory Palamas and his hesychast followers. Helena Kantakouzene, too, wife of John V, was a patron of the arts. She had been classically educated and was the benefactor of scholars, notably of Demetrios Kydones who dedicated to her a translation of one of the works of St Augustine. 

The woman who actually holds power in this period, Anna of Savoy, does her sex little credit: like Yolanda she appears to have been both headstrong and greedy, and, still worse, incompetent. In contrast, empresses such as Irene Kantakouzene Asenina reflect the abilities of their predecessors: they were educated to be managers, possessed of great resources, patrons of art and monastic foundations, and, given the right circumstances, capable of significant political involvement in religious controversies and the running of the empire. Unfortunately they generally had to show their competence in opposition to official state positions. While they may have wished to emulate earlier regent empresses, they were not given the chance: the women who, proud of their class and family, played a public and influential part in the running of the empire belonged to an earlier age."

Byzantine Empresses: Women and Power in Byzantium AD 527-1204, Lynda Garland

[ladydimitrescuspet]

What About What I Want? Chapter 5

AO3 link! sorry for the really long wait for this update! I've been so focused on other fics and honestly I've been thinking this story was a bit shit for a while so I was dragging out updating it! but it turns out it's decently written and that sparked a little inspiration in me! I hope y'all enjoy and let me know what you think if you'd like to! and apologies for any grammatical errors, I hope they're not too hard to figure out if y'all find any!

warnings: slightly nsfw

Tag List (only fill out the form once please): @lord-dimitrescu, @alwaysgoodnight, @paint-it-periwinkle, @lightspica, @ultimatebottom69, @sexyheisenbeast, @crazy-obsessed, @squid3, @inlovewithalcinadimitrescu, @the-obscurity, @sapphicalciee, @ladydimitresculove, @solemnnova, @itsyourgirlmalise, @the-little-shadow, @marvelwomen-simp, @rachelthefanfictionwriter, @d14n4ol, @peachesandlesbians, @celina1221, @theuselesslezbian｜Anna, @Gansito83, @Followingmyheartledmetoyou, (won’t tag, idk why)

-----

"Fuck, Al, I think I'm gonna cum. Again." You moaned, Alcina letting out a small chuckle at your words.

Alcina pressed her nose into your neck. "Again, you say?" She murmured into your neck as you fucked yourself on her cock. "Maybe we should take a break after this one, yes?"

"Mhmm," You agreed, biting your lip as your orgasm began building up. "Alcina, please, I'm so close. Please, please. Please bite me." You begged.

Alcina placed her hands on your hips as she slammed into you. "Not. Right. Now." You started whining nonsense at her. "Shush, draga mea. Now cum for me." Alcina grunted out as she pressed kisses to your neck, then your jaw, before finally claiming your lips in a heated kiss as your orgasm washed over you. The moans that you allowed her mouth to swallow sending her over the edge with you.

You smiled at her when the two of you finally broke the kiss. "So this is our life for a day and a half? Fucking the life out of each other?" You gave her another kiss before climbing off her. You let out a small sigh as you stretched, hissing at how sore you were. "Miranda wouldn't happen to have a shower here, would she?" You asked as you paced around slightly.

Alcina hummed. "Just the emergency chemical shower, I think." Alcina replied. "Perhaps we can take one together, save some time?" Alcina suggested as she got off the bed.

You looked at her with watery eyes. "I changed my mind. Does she have a bath here?" You asked. Alcina nodded her head. "Good. Can we... can we just relax for a moment? Together, I mean."

"Of course, darling." Alcina replied as she pulled you in for a hug. "We can do that. And we can end the ceremony right after, if you want."

You shook your head. "No, no, there's only a few hours left. I just... I just need a moment." You murmured into her stomach. Alcina nodded her head and picked you up, taking you into an adjoining room. When the bath was filled, she lowered you in before getting in behind you. You sighed as you leaned against her chest. "Alci, I'm scared." You said quietly after a few moments.

“What’s got you scared, love?” Alcina asked. She pressed a kiss to the top of your head. “Is it the ceremony?”

You nodded your head. “A bit.” You replied. “And something else.” Alcina pressed small kisses to your neck as you continued speaking. “There was this woman, this old woman. And she, well she… Alcina, please,” You whined.

“I’m sorry, darling.” Alcina apologised, pressed one more kiss to your forehead. “Continue.”

“Thank you.” You replied. You’d managed to calm yourself down to be able to speak once more. “The woman, she told me that Miranda was going to take our child.” The words made you feel sick. “If the baby is fit to be a vessel for her dead daughter, she’s going to take our baby from us. And I can’t….. Alcina, I can’t let her, I won’t let her.”

Alcina stayed quiet as she mulled your words over. “If that’s how it’s to be, draga mea, then who are we to deny Mother Miranda something that will benefit her?” Alcina asked.

You went stiff against her. “You can’t be serious, Alcina.” You said as you pushed yourself away from her to look at her. “Are you fucking kidding me? You’d just give our baby to her without question?”

“If it’s what she wants, yes.” Alcina replied.

You scoffed at her in disbelief. “And what about what I want, Alcina? Does what I want not matter? Does it not hold a fucking candle to Miranda and whatever the fuck she’s going to do with my child?” You asked. “This ceremony, it’s over. I cannot and will not be a part of some experiment to produce the perfect vessel for her dead daughter. I thought you cared about me, but now I know exactly where your loyalty lies.” You stood up from the bath.

“Darling, please, it’s… not here, we’ll talk about it at the castle.” You nodded your head as Alcina exited that bath with you, pulling you into her as she kneeled down to be level with you. “We can’t truly discuss this here. Miranda has eyes and ears everywhere, but when I said my family comes first, I meant that. And I promise you that no harm will befall our little one.” Alcina whispered into your ear.

You melted into her embrace. “Do you truly mean that? You won’t… you won’t go back on your promise?” You asked as you clung to her.

Alcina nodded her head as she picked you up and carried you back to the bed, putting you down gently before kissing you. “I promise with my whole heart that I won’t let her harm you.” She pressed kisses down your body until she got to your belly button. “Or you, little one. Mama’s going to keep you safe, you have my word.”

You let out a soft laugh as she pressed kisses all over your belly, your fingers finding her hair. You let out a soft moan as Alcina’s kisses got closer and closer to your sex. “Alci,” Alcina hummed as she breathed in your scent, her mouth watering. “Alcina, please,”

Alcina pressed the flat of her tongue against you before swiping up. “You taste so marvellous, my love.” Alcina whispered against you. You let out a whine when she crawled back up your body, giving you more kisses before she finally reached your face. “Te iubesc.”

You smiled at her before cupping her cheeks and kissing her. “I love you too.”

***

“I hate you, I hate you, I hate you!” You screamed.

Daniela looked over at Alcina. “Mother, is Y/N alright?” Daniela asked.

“They’re fine.” Alcina said, patting her daughter’s hand reassuringly. “I think. I’ll go check on them. You tell your sisters that dinner will be ready in a bit.” Daniela swarmed off at her Mother’s instructions. “Darling, are you alright? Daniela’s a bit worried about you.”

“That bitch called.” Alcina raised her eyebrow. “Miranda, she called. She wants to… she wants to see how we’re doing, how the baby is doing.” You placed your hand over our belly, protectively.“I don’t want her here, Alcina.”

Alcina sighed. “There really is nothing I can do to stop her from coming to the castle, my love.” Alcina replied as she walked over to you. “It’s been two months since the last time she was over here and Mother Miranda assured me that she didn’t want to use our baby as her vessel, the thought never even crossed her mind.”

“But she could’ve been lying to you, Alcina. Lying to me.” You sighed as you leaned into her. “I don’t trust her, I can’t.” You shook your head with a small sniffle. Alcina leaned down and pressed a kiss to your forehead.

“Alright. I’ll delay Miranda’s visit to the castle as long as I can, but she will have to see the baby at some point. To make sure it’s healthy.” Alcina said.

“I know, I know, but… Can’t Donna do it? I trust her.” You replied.

“Donna can do some things, but there are…other things that Miranda will need to do when examining the child that Donna can not.” Alcina responded. “Just one examination, dear, that’s all she has to do until the baby is born. Is that okay with you?”

You frowned. “Just the one?” Alcina nodded her head and you sighed. “If it’s only the one. And you have to promise to stay in the room, please.” You grabbed her hand and squeezed it.

“Of course, darling. And Donna can do the rest of the examinations and then Miranda will do the one after our little one is here. Sound like a plan, my love?” Alcina asked. You nodded your head, not trusting your words. “Good, good. Now, dinner is almost ready and I’m sure the girls are bickering like they always are when I’m not around. Shall we?” Alcina offered you her hand and you took it.

“You really don’t think Miranda will take the baby once it’s born? Or during the examination?” You asked as she led you to the dining room.

“Darling, listen. I’ll say it as many times as I have to, I won’t let anything happen to our child. And I’m sure the girls would say the same things. Right, girls?” Alcina asked as the two of you entered the room. The two of you got a chorus of “Yes, of course, Mother,” from them and it made you smile a bit. “There’s that gorgeous smile of yours, my love. I promise, our baby is safe and nothing will happen.”

You let out a deep breath, nodding your head. “I’m sure you’re right.” You said.

Dinner went by quickly and soon you found yourself in Alcina’s study, sitting in her lap. “The old woman mentioned something else.” You said softly as you played with Alcina’s curls. She hummed. “Mentioned that if the baby wasn’t to Miranda’s standards that a few years from now, she’d find her perfect vessel.”

“Hmm, is that so?” Alcina asked. You nodded your head. “Then we really have nothing to worry about, yes? I doubt a baby born into the Dimitrescu family will serve as a perfect vessel. I mean, I was a… failure of her experimentations. As were Karl, Donna, and Salvatore.” Alcina replied as she did some paperwork. You opened your mouth to reply, but Alcina spoke again first. “That’s enough talk of this for right now. You need your rest, as does our child. You’re free to fall asleep right here, but if you’d be more comfortable in the room, I can have Helena take you to our chambers." Alcina suggested.

You shook your head. "No, I want to stay with you. You can carry me to the room once you've finished here." You said as you snuggled into her. Alcina chuckled, but pressed a kiss to the top of your head.

"Very bold of you to assume that I would do such a thing, little one." Alcina teased. When you didn't respond, Alcina noted that your breathing had started to even out indicating that you were asleep. "Sweet dreams, iubirea mea." Alcina whispered before pressing a kiss to your forehead.

[pies-writes-and-more]

PIES’ FIC RECOMMENDATIONS FOR JUNE 2020

Click HERE for the amazing fics I read in May 2020!

NOTE: If you’ve got an incredible fic that you are super proud of or if you think that I should read something you’ve read, PLEASE SEND IT TO ME! I’m really big on StevexFem!Reader, BuckyxFem!Reader, WandaxFem!Reader, CarolxFem!Reader, and Stucky fics!!! (And of course any fics with gender neutral readers is ALWAYS welcome :) )

If you do end up reading these fics, please tag me if you reblog them or comment on them!! I’d love to see your guys’ reactions :)

PS. if these links dont work for some reason, please let me know so I can update this list because I was very distracted halfway through making this so it might not be perfect!

SPECIAL MENTION FIC/POEM RECOMMENDATION

Okay so I’m not doing this because I’m trying to give myself a shoutout however, @wxstedhexrt​ and I have been collaborating in a poetry inspired fanfic collection called Falling! Tis a BuckyxFem!Reader series and if I do say so myself, it’s fucking adorable. 

The real reason I’m mentioning it is because @wxstedhexrt​‘s poems are some of the most real and gorgeously written things I’ve ever met so please give them a look! 

She has this series on Achilles and Patroclus, this collection about the word Silver, gorgeous poems from last year (involving Icarus, Apollo, and Helen of Troy), and so many more!!! Check out the tag #poetry or #mywriting on her blog!!! Send her some love :)

ANYWAYS BACK TO THE FANFICS!

1. Homecoming by @scentedsongrebel | Steve Rogers x Desi!Reader “You bring Steve to Mumbai to meet your family“ Yall want some wonderful representation in your fic reading!!??? READ THIS ONE! It’s so fucking wholesome and I love the whole story line of Steve learning more about his partner’s culture so that he can impress her family. Fucking adorable. 100% fluff with a wonderfully diverse reader and author!!!!

2. Iced Tea by @kaunis-sielu | Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader I don’t think there’s an official summary for this fic ( @kaunis-sielu pls correct me if I’m wrong) BUT LEMME TELL YALL. I AM A SUCKER FOR BIKER FICS. WE LOVE BIKER STEVE. This was 100% FLUFFY and we LOVE IT. Amazing job!!!!!!

3. let me show you by @moteldwelling | Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader bucky gives reader a “redo” on her first time, and takes her virginity. Listen here people. This smut took my soul and dragged me to hell and back. I am a SUCKER for Bucky fics but this one like took my life away. We love a man who makes sure his lady is having a good time when being intimate with her!!!!! we stan a good boi. Anyways if I keep thinking about this fic, I’mma need to go shower so I’mma end this here. Go read for yourselves and then cry with me about why Bucky Barnes isn’t in our lives. 18+ readers only of course! 100% HOT. FUCKING. SMUT.

4. Under the Rainbow, Draga mea by @binkysteebnpewter | Wanda Maximoff x Fem!Reader Again, I don’t think there’s an official summary for this (pls correct me if I’m wrong @binkysteebnpewter) and YES, I KNOW i put this in my May recommendations but I finished reading the series in JUNE so it is HERE AGAIN and DESERVES to be HERE AGAIN BECAUSE WE LOVE FICS WITH 100% GAY SHIT AND LOVE <3 I am a fucking sucker for the love that Wanda and this Reader have together. If you’re not convinced, ask @wxstedhexrt how much I cried reading it lol. anyways an amazing series that I will continue to go back reading again and again because i LOVE wlw fics <3 

5. Oh no, that’s bad by @andyl394 | Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader You’re a college student, you’re mad angry, Bucky ruins your paper, that’s not good is it? I read through this 20-part series like there was NO TOMORROW and god DAMN. We love hilarious social media AUs but this one really killed me. I always love Bucky who is soft and shy in fics but the Bucky in this fic was a LITTLE SHIT and i had so much ANGST. Anyways, if you read this fic, you may want to slap the characters BUT I PROMISE THERES AN ADORABLE HAPPY ENDING!!!! 100% INCREDIBLE

6. Home by @evanstush | Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader It’s been 2 years since the last battle and it’s now Morgan’s 7th birthday, and well, Tony being Tony, he prepared a small party for her little girl, inviting everyone from the team, including you. So Kate decided to rip my heart out with this fic and have me on my knees sobbing so that’s cool. That’s it, that’s all I have to say. JK, this fic actually is like half and half FLUFF and ANGST but lord is it worth it. Kate, you know I adore you so much and your fics play a big part in why! God this girl deserves more love on these stories because holy shit I’m DEAD.

7. Baby Self by @honeyloverogers | Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader Alternative to Babies! Assemble, What if it was you that got turned into a baby instead? YALL WANT FUCKING FLUFF!?!?!?! 1000000000% FLUFFFFFFF AND CUTENESSSSSS (with like a little bit of a piece of shit lady who comes around but like its cool because a baby says fuck lol) THIS WAS A FIC WRITTEN LIKE NO OTHER. I LOVED IT SO MUCH. IT WAS SO PERFECT. Think of endgame and that moment when Scott turns into a baby??? Yeah now scratch that and think of Y/N if SHE turned into a baby and the avengers couldn’t figure out how to turn her back right away so now everyone has to take care of this baby HGOIDHFOISHFOISDHF the baby fever was so real in this fic ughhhhh <3 

8. Insecurities by @evanstush | Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader You’re 7 months pregnant, and you can’t help be so insecure about some things. And here’s Kate again bringing me back to life with more wholesome fluff and a wholesome husband who loves his wife so fucking much and ugh i- i read this fic over and over sometimes and it just makes me realize how much i want this adhfoiasjdfoi <3 I aint pregnant but if I WAS i would want this steve to be comforting me ugh 103874203847% FLUFFFFFFF <3 

9. Requested fic (idk if it has a name??? sorry) by @donutloverxo | Steve Rogers x Fem!Reader Request: Hey, as for the headcanon requests how about Steve giving a lift to a girl in need when it's raining heavily or smth? I don't know where this idea came from 😅 Did yall need some confirmation that Sarah Rogers raised her son the fucking right way?!?!? WELL HERE YOU GO. THIS MANS OUT HERE BEING AN ABSOLUTE SWEETHEART <3 ugh we love wholesome drabbles really <3 amazing workkkkk!!!!!

10. Leather and Lace by @queen-kass-the-writer​ | Steve Rogers x AFuckingKickAssFem!OC :) Steve Rogers hardly expects anything to come out of a sleepy night at his new favorite dive bar until a pristinely dressed little lady saunters into the bar with a delicate smile but a wicked uppercut. Biker!Steve x Helena Alright so this is a little different than the above fics because THIS IS AN OC FIC :D now if any of yall know me I don’t tend to read OC fics HOWEVER Kass is INCREDIBLE at churning out fics. I had gave her an idea of a Biker Steve fic and like BAM she made it :O (seriously i don’t know how that is... to have an idea... and actually produce it?!??!) It’s a hilarious story of Biker Steve being head over heels Helena which is adorable (and a character named after me being Bucky’s shithead date lol hilarious) YALL BETTER READ THIS SHIT BECAUSE IT’S 100% WONDERFUL

** ** ** ** ** ** **

Okay so I know that this list is FAR shorter than my last recommendations list. I suckkkkked at reading fics this month lol. I’m definitely going to try and read more in July so here’s to hoping! Love you all a ton :D

[nrosei]

"Draga moja Helena!

Proslo je dosta vremena od posljednjeg pisma i iako mislim da nisam ni ocekivao odgovor, nadam se da ti je pomoglo da razumijes zasto sam ucinio to sto sam ucinio. Sigurno me mrzis zbog toga, ali ako te tjesi, ja sam sebe mrzim jos vise. Bio sam sebican, glup, zaslijepljen... Sve ono za sto si me optuzila. Iako te tada nisam zelio slusati, znam da si bila potpuno u pravu. Je li prekasno da kazem da mi je zao?

Molim te, vjeruj mi kad kazem da te volim vise od icega na svijetu. Bez obzira na sve sto se dogodilo i sto jos uvijek mislis o meni, zelim samo da budes toga svjesna.

Oprosti mi, molim te!"

[covjek-casopis]

književna premijera: ROMAN DRAŠKA SIKIMIĆA "ČVOR NA OMČI", 2019, ulomak

Idućeg jutra probudio sam se uznemiren. Sanjao sam da je pao Mjesec, pao je dok sam pokušavao da ga fotografišem. U plamenu je pao, zacrvenio se i, onako, kao da je malo u sebi pukao, kao čovjek, i onda je narandžast kliznuo s neba; čekao sam udar na Zemlju, da nas sve poubija, ali on je kliznuo negdje drugo, taman kao da ima gdje drugo da padne. Onda sam se probudio; probudio sam se, mislim, jer sam bio ljut što nije pao na sve nas i što smo se uopšte probudili. Znam kako bi taj momenat pada Mjeseca na Zemlju izgledao nama koji ga vidimo dok se približava, ali nisam mogao da pretpostavim kako bi bilo onima sa druge strane planete. Sve to mi je, zatim, dosadilo i postalo besmisleno. Prestao sam da razmišljam. Izašao sam iz kuće. To radim odmah čim se probudim. Porodične kuće izjutra izgledaju prijeteće, zidovi se nakon dugog sna zbijaju i sve izgleda manje, krov samo što se ne sruši, vazduh je potrošen u snovima ukućana, treba odmah otići i ostaviti sobama prostora da se oporave od nepodnošljivo dugog prisustva ljudi. Uostalom, taj jutarnji izlazak iz kuće predstavlja svojevrsno rađanje čovjeka. Izmišljao sam tako razloge za svaki svoj postupak. Izašao sam, dakle, sa izgovorom da je to rađanje. Do kafića u kome sam radio kao konobar postoji jednostavan put, jedna ulica bez skretanja, ali ja sam, kao i svakog jutra od povratka iz bolnice, išao u suprotnom pravcu, prema maloj šumi od pedesetak stabala kestena, prošao bih kroz taj mir, ispod krošnji, pa u sporedne ulice i ponovo bih izašao na glavnu, i tako stigao na krajnje odredište, u taj kafić, čuvenu Jazbinu. Sjeo sam i naručio kafu. Na mobilnom telefonu vidio sam poruku od Helene. To stvorenje već nekoliko mjeseci daje sve od sebe da istraži mogućnosti nabavljanja vještačke šake za moju desnu ruku. Slala mi je tekstove i slike o bioničkim rukama i šakama, a ja sam bio uporan da ne želim nikakvu bioničku šaku. A onda sam otišao i dalje - insistirao sam da želim botaničku ruku. Postao sam nesnošljiv sa tom idejom; znao sam da je suluda, nemoguća, glupa i djetinjasta, ali zbog toga mi se još više svidjela. „Želim grane umjesto prstiju“, govorio sam Heleni. „Da li si svjesna, draga medicinska sestro, kakav bih tada konobar bio? Hej!“ A ona se smijala i nervirala u isto vrijeme. Bio sam previše neozbiljan, prije svega prema njoj. Sa Helenom sam se prvi put nakon povratka iz Beograda u Hercegovinu čuo u neobičnoj okolnosti. Bio sam na groblju kad me prvi put nazvala. Otac i ja smo sahranjivali šaku. „Hoćeš li ti izgovoriti neku molitvu, ili posljednji pozdrav, nešto? Mislim da nije red da ja govorim bilo kakvo amatersko opelo“, rekao sam tog dana ocu. Nije slušao šta govorim, samo je skočio u grobnicu našu praznu, dostojanstveno da spusti moju pokojnu šaku. Mogao je, bez ikakve sumnje, samo da je ubaci, ali očevi naši drže do takvih stvari kao što su smrti bližnjih, pa makar to bila i samo nečija šaka, valja joj se pokloniti i poštu joj odati. U tom trenutku zazvonio mi je telefon. Zvala je Helena. „U toku je sahrana“, počeo sam da govorim odmah čim sam pritisnuo dugme da se javim, ona nije stigla ni da me pozdravi. Nastavio sam: „I nije baš mnogo ljudi došlo, tačnije, samo otac i ja smo tu, i pomislio sam, sad, kad vidjeh da ti zoveš, kako nešto nedostaje: svakoj poštenoj sahrani je potrebna žena, a ti si, uz to, i nekako povezana sa pokojnicom, pa sam pomislio da bi možda voljela da prisustvuješ, makar bežično, i ako želiš, reci neku posljednju riječ za šaku, otac i ja smo bez teksta, ili smo samo suviše ponosni da kažemo neku oproštajnu misao.“ Otac je gledao u mene kao da nisam normalan. „Jebi se!“, rekla je Helena i prekinula vezu. Otac je uskoro navukao tešku kamenu ploču i ja nisam osjetio ništa prema svojoj šaci koja je ostala ispod nje. „Eto“, rekao je otac gledajući u mene. „Probaj tu drugu da zadržiš na sebi malo duže.“ „Hej, nisam ja kriv! Reci to Demijanu!“ „Taj konj nije ni za šta kriv, konju.“ „Nisam ni ja, i ja sam samo životinja!“ Tako je prošao naš razgovor na sahrani. Pokupili smo se odatle; groblje nije neprijatno mjesto, ali svakako da nije bilo prijatno stajati pored rupetina u kojima ćemo, jednom, zauvijek, svi završiti. Kasnije me otac pitao zašto sam uopšte rekao da mi pošalju šaku, to niko normalan ne radi. Nabrajao mi je sve ljude koje je znao a koji su izgubili ili ruku ili nogu, niko ih nije, kaže, sahranjivao, osim nas. Nisam imao odgovor na njegovo pitanje. Uostalom, oni su krivi, zašto su mi uopšte ponudili da biram? „Jesi li našao nešto?“, prekinuo je moje razmišljanje Vanjski. On je konobar u Jazbini već šest godina, radili smo zajedno tri. Pita me jesam li uspio da nađem neki posao. „Ništa još. Gledao sam nešto na par mjesta...“, rekao sam. Bez nekog posebnog razloga lagao sam; nigdje nisam pitao, ništa nisam tražio, čak ni pomislio nisam da se raspitam, ili da makar razmislim koji posao bih sada mogao da radim. Promijenio sam temu. „Ko je bila ona djevojka sinoć?“, pitao sam. „Koja?“ „Stajala je pored mene pet minuta. Nisi je vidio?“ „Nisam. Pa radio sam, ne mogu sve da vidim.“ „Mislio sam da žene ipak vidiš i dok radiš.“ „Kakva je bila?“ „Navija za Mančester. Znaš li neku koja navija za Junajted?“ Vanjski se zamislio. „Ne znam nijednu koja voli fudbal uopšte“, rekao je. On je bio zaluđen tom igrom, igrao je fudbal na lokalnim turnirima i u svim ostalim prilikama, a nadimak je dobio zato što je uvijek pogađao vanjsku stativu. Počeli smo zatim priču o Mančesteru i sezoni koja je u toku. Nisam bio raspoložan za tu priču, ali sa Vanjskim nisam mogao da je izbjegnem. Posljednjih mjeseci ni o čemu nisam mogao da razgovaram, nijedna tema me nije zanimala, u glavi je sve bilo kao nakvašeno i često bih mislio da zapravo ludim. Ako čovjek može da onjuši svoj mozak, onda mi se upravo to događa. Vanjski je radio i pričao. Došao bi do mene i rekao jednu rečenicu, i onda otišao da usluži ili naplati. „Stari je mogao još koju godinu da vodi tim“, kaže i ode. „Zašto nije ostao dok osposobe nekoga da ga zamijeni?“, pitao bi i nastavio da radi. Ja nisam razmišljao ni o čemu. Padao sam kroz svoje misli, privezan za teška i nejasna osjećanja, tonuo sam sve dublje, bio sam majmun koji pada sa drveta, beskrajno visokog stabla, padao sam kroz grane velikom brzinom i ni za jednu nisam mogao da se uhvatim, samo sam padao, padao i bio šiban po licu svakom granom koja mi promakne. A promicale su sve. Ali disao sam. Samo to. Disao. Nakon izlaska iz bolnice tonuo sam svaki dan, sve dublje propadao u nešto što bi moglo da se zove beznađe. Nije mi to bilo toliko nepoznato polje, okopavao sam ga i ranije, ali ovaj put osjećao sam se kao šraf bez glave koji će propasti u neko sasvim novo crnilo, bez mogućnosti da se ikada izvuče. Osjećaj da nemam čime da se zadržim bio je mnogo više poražavajući od samog propadanja. Možda me jedino još omča može zaustaviti u ovom padu?

_________________________

DRAŠKO SIKIMIĆ rođen je u Ljubinju (Hercegovina) 1984. godine. 2016. objavio je svoju prvu pjesničku zbirku, pod naslovom "Smotuljci". Ubrzo je publika dočekala i "Ogrebotine", a potom i "Moje kosti ujedaju". "Čvor na omči" njegov je prvi roman. Za sebe kaže kako često misli da je vuk, pa izbjegava ljude. Ne voli računanje vremena i rijetko priča. Smatrao bi se boljim čovjekom kada bi saznao da ga je neka ptica pogledala. Osjeća se važnim kada se pas lutalica zaustavi pored njega. Nada se da su životinje srećnije zbog pogleda koje im upućujemo.

[portalmunicipiosbaianos-blog]

Saída de Bebianno pode pavimentar queda do governo

 Se as revelações divulgadas pela imprensa na última semana sobre um esquema de candidaturas “laranjas” nas eleições do ano passado envolvendo o PSL se confirmarem, o Congresso poderá instaurar um processo de cassação da chapa Bolsonaro/Mourão.

A análise é do colunista da Folha de S.Paulo, Celso Rocha de Barros. O escândalo, revelado pelo mesmo jornal, aponta que o então presidente do PSL e hoje ministro da Secretaria-Geral da Presidência, Gustavo Bebianno, liberou o repasse de recursos públicos do fundo partidário para duas candidaturas com características de serem laranjas, ou seja, quando a pessoa não tem intenção de concorrer de fato, mas participa do processo com o objetivo de desviar recursos do fundo eleitoral.

Possivelmente preocupado com a imagem, o presidente Bolsonaro decidiu pela exoneração de Bebianno. O ato ainda não foi publicado no Diário Oficial da União, mas deve acontecer oficialmente nesta segunda (18) ou durante a semana.

O colunista Rocha de Barros avalia a crise como fruto de dois movimentos que disputam as forças no Planalto: o bolsonarismo das redes, ou a turma de Olavo de Carvalho, incluindo os filhos do presidente; contra a turma dos que apoiam Bebianno e defendem o funcionamento de um governo normal, “no bom e mau sentido”, pelas vias institucionais já conhecidas. Deste lado estariam Rodrigo Maia, recém-eleito presidente da Câmara, o vice-presidente Hamilton Mourão, militares e a turma que aprova a reforma da Previdência.

Ao que tudo parece, o olavismo venceu a briga pelo afastamento de Bebianno, mas Rocha Barros pondera que isso poderá resultar na derrocada da família Bolsonaro no poder. Isso porque o quase-ex-ministro estava a frente da articulação do governo no Congresso. Em outras palavras, sem Bebianno e suas articulações Bolsonaro terá dificuldades para aprovar as reformas no Congresso e, pior, pode estar pavimentando o caminho para a sua própria queda.

“Se as denúncias contra Bebianno forem referentes a essas negociações [da articulação do governo com o Congresso e distribuição de cargos], ou se os aliados acharem que toda negociação será exposta pelo Twitter, a articulação política do governo Bolsonaro morre”.

Barros já havia pontuado em outro artigo que “com rede social” se derruba Renan “mas não aprova reforma”. Ele destaca que, pela forma como Carlos Bolsonaro tomou a frente do pai, desmentindo via Twitter que o presidente e Bebianno conversaram na última semana, logo após às denúncias da Folha, pode significar que o vereador tem denúncias mais graves contra Bebianno, difíceis de “serem abafadas por muito tempo”.

“Em segundo lugar, como notou o jornalista Alon Feuerwerker, não é fácil para um governo se desvencilhar de sua facção mais leal, a que cai se ele cair. Bolsonaro não é indispensável para Guedes, para Moro, para os generais. Mas é indispensável para os doidões do Twitter. Os olavistas teriam o mesmo espaço em qualquer outro governo? Não”.

Com esse quadro, o presidente precisa se perguntar se vale se manter “cercado de gente leal em um governo fraco. Porque se ele desistir de Guedes, Moro e, especialmente, dos generais, não chega o Carnaval”, conclui.

 Ø  Caso Bebianno: uma história mal contada. Por Helena Chagas

 Presume-se que Jair Bolsonaro saiba por que está demitindo Gustavo Bebianno e que este saiba por que está sendo demitido, embora diga que não. Quem não sabe de nada somos nós, que engolimos a conversa que passa pela ciumeira do filho 02, pelo jogo de empurra em torno do laranjal de candidatas do PSL e pela quebra de confiança gerada por vazamentos mútuos de conversas palacianas. É evidente que há mais, possivelmente muito mais, na história dessa demissão mal contada – e até agora mal executada.

A denúncia da Folha de má-gestão dos recursos do fundo eleitoral, até como ponta do iceberg, é um ingrediente da receita, mas não o elemento suficiente. Se assim fosse, o ministro do Turismo, Marcelo Álvaro Antônio, até agora intocado, também estaria na marca do pênalti.

Evidentemente, há muito mais por aí, como até registramos aqui ao falar dos “Milhões de motivos do P$L” ( https://osdivergentes.com.br/os-divergentes/os-milhoes-de-motivos-do-pl/) na semana passada. Se as investigações pedidas por Bolsonaro sobre o próprio partido avançarem, isso pode vir à tona.

E justificaria até a suposta decisão da família Bolsonaro de tomar distância e trocar o enrolado PSL por um novo partido, uma suposta nova UDN, conforme informou o Estadão no fim de semana. Seria, quem sabe, o início de uma nova narrativa, na qual o presidente e seus filhos, insatisfeitos com as mazelas do partido pelo qual se elegeram, vão buscar outra turma.

O problema é que presidente da República não muda de partido nem de turma assim como quem troca a chuteira pelo chinelo Rider. Deixar ex-aliados magoados e bem informados no caminho é a melhor receita para a queda – e que o digam todos os que caíram na história recente do país, sempre com contribuição decisiva e muito maior de gente de casa do que de adversários.

Bolsonaro parece só agora estar percebendo isso, e não terá outra explicação para o fato de vir prolongando a novela da demissão de Bebianno desde sexta-feira, quando teria decidido em definitivo exonerar o ministro.

Só que, depois do desgaste e da série de trapalhadas que marcaram os últimos dias, não há mais solução boa para Bolsonaro. A demissão, ou até uma improvável reconciliação, será sempre uma história mal-contada, prato cheio para aliados pouco confiáveis e adversários.

 Ø  Bolsonaro piorou sua situação com a estapafúrdia demissão “elogiosa” de Bebianno. Por Kiko Nogueira

 Bolsonaro fez a demissão mais estapafúrdia da história da política brasileira.

Cinco dias após uma crise criada por ele e pelo filho Carlos, exonerou Bebianno.

O discurso tem cara de pedido de divórcio em que o sujeito tenta se fingir de bonzinho para não acabar na draga completa.

O porta-voz Otávio Rêgo Barros alegou que a razão é de “foro íntimo do nosso presidente”, um clássico que significa tudo e não significa nada.

Depois a assessoria de Jair divulgou um vídeo patético.

“Desde a semana passada diferentes pontos de vista sobre questões relevantes TRUXERAM (sic) a necessidade de uma reavaliação”, diz ele.

“Tenho que reconhecer a dedicação e comprometimento do senhor Gustavo Bebianno à frente da coordenação da campanha eleitoral em 2018. Seu trabalho foi importante para o nosso êxito”, continua.

“Continuo acreditando em sua seriedade”.

Ora. Se acredita, por que está mandando o cidadão embora?

Trata-se do mesmo homem que ele chamou de mentiroso juntamente com seu menino esquisito Carluxo, numa execração pública.

O teatro todo foi encenado de maneira a ver se Bebianno não abre o bico sobre o laranjal do PSL, os respingos em Jair e o que mais o agora ex-ministro tiver na manga (ele foi tesoureiro da campanha, lembre-se).

Ofereceram Itaipu. Ele recusou. Ofereceram a embaixada de Roma. Idem.

Ele sabe muito. E já deixou claro agora que seu alvo será Jair e suas crianças disfuncionais.

Onyx passa a ser, agora, o único civil com gabinete no Planalto.

Até quando?

Tic-tac, tic-tac…

 Fonte:  Jornal GGN/Os Divergentes/DCM

[catladydavenport]

Desde mi bisexual Mujerilidad (Dialogo Mujeril de dos Virginias)

“La vida es un sueño, el despertar es lo que nos mata.” Virginia Woolf.

“Duermo poco… por eso sueño despierta” G. Virginia Davenport.

Inglaterra fue fundada por una terca guerrera celta, Boudica (Boadicea en mi infancia), una reina iscena a la que los romanos golpearon en público, y cuyas hijas violaron.

La respuesta de Boudica fue el levantamiento celta que arraso con el poder masculino mas letal del mundo antiguo, su rebelión provocó tal crisis al imperio romano que necesitaron aplicar las mas feroces estrategias de guerra para contener la ira de una Mujer.

Desde la ira de Boudica hasta la ira de los patriarcados hijos sanos de aquel macho romano herido, se extienden muros de opresiones que van mutando, vistiendo de charro soldado a la moda el nuevo traje de un emperador machista, cuya autoridad real, como sus ropajes, solo es vista por otros como el.

“Las mujeres han vivido todos estos siglos como esposas, con el poder mágico y delicioso de reflejar la figura del hombre, el doble de su tamaño natural” Virginia Woolf.

Hay un puente desde el segundo tomo de “El Segundo Sexo” de Simona de Beauvoir, una cadena de concreto patriarcal que aprieta a las mujeres, incluso a las lesbianas, a un matrimonio político obligatorio con el hombre.

La mano de ese hombre aprieta a todas, tanto en el matrimonio simbolico que le aplica la androcracia católica a las monjas casandolas con un Dios hombre, sin importar su orientación sexual, como en su reciclaje en el matrimonio igualitario que instituye la monogamia patriarcal entre mujeres que aman a otras mujeres.

Y nosotras, con nuestra sumisión naturalizada al patriarca con la apatía y la inacción como consecuencia, duplicamos sus microtamaños para que así, parados de puntitas, puedan acceder a los espacios de poder.

Como en las Secretarias de Diversidad Sexual del PRD y de Morena, en las que homunculos rosados, como Antonio Medina y su sobrepesada de misoginia lengua con guante de box a control remoto, Manuel Oropeza,o Jaime Lopez Vela, excluyen a Mujeres Lesbianas, bisexuales y TTTrans de una representación política.

“Si el Homopatriarcado nos llama Mujeriles por criticar sus acuerdos misoginos, lesbofobicos, transfobicos y feminofobicos… entonces soy Feminista Mujeril” G. Virginia Davenport .

El termino despectivo “Feminismo mujeril” fue publicado en un post de facebook como consecuencia de un enfrentamiento entre mujeres feministas del estado de Nayarit y activistas gay lacayos del subsecretario de diversidad sexual del PRD, Manuel Oropeza.

el perredista Oropeza fue declarado como “persona no grata” por colectivas del movimiento de Mujeres por las agresiones que propinó a una activista feminista que le reclamó intentar parasitar una iniciativa ciudadana por la identidad de las personas Travestis, Transgenero y Transexuales.

El subsecretario de diversidad sexual del PRD reaccionó contra las feministas con un ataque doble del patriarcado mutante:el homopatriarcado compuesto por hombres gay convocó a una marcha del orgullo para invisibilizar la realizada por mujeres diversas, entre ellas trans, y un brazo del transpatriarcado, a través de una mujer transgenero aliada de ellos, emitió una convocatoria en apoyo del “pride” homopatriarcal.

El concepto del “Feminismo mujeril”, emitido desde ese transpatriarcado como una supuesta crítica a la transfobia de varios sectores de feminismo patriarcal terf es un contrasentido ridiculo que provoca lo contrario, y demuestra lo impulsivo y misogino del patriarcado mutante arcoiris.

“La Mujer no nace, se construye”, señala Simona de Beauvoir, su discurso se basa en distanciar a la Mujer de la Hembra a la que considera la prision de la especie. De Beauvoir desgenitaliza a la Mujer, con lo que el término “Mujeril” es también aplicable a Mujeres Transgenro, Transexuales y Travestis de la misma forma que a Cisgénero.

Por lo que, la intención insultante del termino “Mujeril” radiografia una equivocada intención de insulto machista, una economización intelectual similar a la comicidad involuntaria de un transpatriarcado tenue, que elije lanzar su declaración de simbiosis homopatriarcal en apoyo del subsecretario de diversidad sexual justo en un momento en el que las feministas de Nayarit denuncian una ola de feminicidios.

incluso la representante mas radical del transpatriarcado insertada en el patriarcal feminismo transfobico TERF, Miranda Yardley, guru de la endotransfobia, fue superada en sus reduccionismos genitoreproduccionistas por el “feminismo mujeril” del transpatriarcado aliado de oropeza.

““No son las catástrofes, los asesinatos, las muertes, las enfermedades las que nos envejecen y nos matan; es la manera como los demás miran y ríen y suben las escalinatas del bus”. Virginia Woolf.

Los andamios estructurales del patriarcado heterosexual y de sus mutaciones homopatriarcales y transpatriarcales cruzan con sus alianzas simbólicas el mundo que nos rodea, y nos mantienen en sumisión, creando millones de microfeminicidios simbólicos que pasan desapercibidos por la naturalización de la cotidianidad patriarcal.

Ya no solo es el feminicidio corporal, el asesinato de nuestras vidas en manos del macho heterosexual, del hijo sano del patrarcado, ni la cosificación de la cuerpa de la mujer feminizada por los medios de comunicación del sistema de poder machocrata,

Opera el odio del machismo estrictural hacia la vida de la victima, el ensañarse con su vida descalificandola desde sistemas de morales diseñadas para resguardar la dignidad del padre, del novio, del esposo, del macho, como justificación del asesinato patrarcal.

El matrimonio, como institución de control a la mujer para el privilegio del hombre, fue creada por el patriarcado heterosexual y posteriormente pintado de rosa y vendido a las mujeres lesbianas, bisexuales y TTTrans como un idealizado instrumento de normalización social.

La codificación de nuestras cuerpas por nosotras mismas pasa por los estandares automaticos que define el sexismo heteropatrarcal, de tal manera que el analisis sobre la forma en la que las Mujeres concebimos nuestras anatomias sigue los estandares analizados por Susan Sontag en su ensayo de 1974 sobre la Belleza de la Mujer.

La Mujer no solo debe enfrentar con sus dientes, uñas y sobre todo su inteligencia la cosificación del sexismo heterosexual. Desde la disidencia a la heteronorma, las Mujeres lesbianas, bisexuales y TTTrans enfrentamos tambien la misoginia del hompatriarcado que, en forma de "dragas”, da salida al desprecio a la mujer que escenifican los gays homonormados u homonormos contra las caracteristicas sociales femeninas.

Por eso es necesaro para el sistema homopatriaral establecer complicidades con el transpatriarcado, para tener agencias que tiendan puentes con la colonización del gay homonormo hacia el movimiento de Mujeres TTTrans, el cual comienza romper ataduras y generar su discurso propio.

No es gratuito que el transpatriarcado se inaugure como aliado del homopatriarcado justo en el momento en el que el Movimiento de Mujeres, a través de la colectiva rebelde “Las Constituyentes CDMX Feministas” impulsó la inclusión de las poblaciones TTTrans en la Constitucion de la CDMX, enfrentando el rechazo de sectores lesbico gays homonormados.

Como tampoco es gratuito que esos mismos agentes del transpatriarcado nieguen e invisibilicen el papel de la lucha feminista en la inclusión de las tres poblaciones TTTrans a la constitución, y quieran hacer pasar la alianza historica entre Mujeres TTTrans y Cis feministas como un logro espontaneo de una alianza homopatrarcal.

En la inglaterra post boudica, las mujeres que llegaron a reinar fueron llamadas “Lobas” (She Wolves) por su fuerza y ferocidad, e incluso por sus enfrentamientos contra el patriarcado monarquico inglés.

Afortunadamente, las Mujeres y las shewolves, incluida alguna que otra Doberwoman,también nacemos afuera de Inglaterra.

“Todo es efímero… como el arcoiris…” (Virginia Woolf)

Julio 2017. Ciudad de México.

Para mis hermanas feministas Yolitzin Sillas Marii Manzano Aide Aguilar Mónica Pedroza Rosa María Cabrera Lotfe Shibboleth Olvera Italia Springfhield Helena Fernanda String Ariana Guedea Dulce Kim Diana Lopez Muñoz Monica Adriana Beltran Cabrera

[endlessrebirthrpg-blog1]

Draga Edström, PB: Helena McKelvie

Bienvenida a la vuelta 2.0 ^^

[nrosei]

"Draga moja Helena!

Zao mi je, ali opet ti moram pisati. U onim trenucima mi silno treba netko, a ti si jedina koja bi mogla razumjeti. Postaje tesko, ponekad se osjecam usamljeno i jako me strah. Lakse mi je kad pomislim da postoji netko, netko tko me razumije, iako pretpostavljam da se jos uvijek nisi pomirila s onim sto sam ucinio ni s mojim odlukama. Ljubavi moja, nisam ni ja. A najgore od svega je to sto si bila potpuno u pravu. Ovo je ludo mjesto, luda situacija i doista ne bih trebao biti ovdje. Molim te, pokusaj shvatiti da, ma gdje bio i sto god radio, uvijek mislim na tebe.

Oprosti mi, molim te."