#heheheheh I love melancholy angst

[hitwiththetmnt]

Sad Robot P1 | P2

[atherix]

oh my.. the new chapter sure was a rollercoaster and i am about to make zero sense because my brain is in absolute shambles

at first i was like ok sweet more dream lore but then I was like PEARL PEARL PEARL YES WE LEARN MORE

but then you IMMEDIATELY drop the sepia thing and the STORM AND THE DOORS AND “a dream is never just a dream for us” IM—

and you flipped it so fast with the eye color change and the pain and double life pearl angst is really comin through so strong

so at this point all I can think is grian pls dont die pls you gotta go to scar and then the poor bird has been wrecked emotionally once more and I am left with a distant melancholy vibe that is only temporarily relieved by sweet scar and his half aware attempt at comfort (my poor heart can’t take it)

how you manage to pack so much emotion into one chapter like this i will never understand but just know i am still 100% fully invested in this story

Understamdable <3

HEHEHEHE I love the dream lore in this fic mmmm. BUT ALSO PEARL YES <3 Pearl lore <3 It hurts <3

Hehehehehe there was so much going on yes :) And I love ominous warnings mm

DOUBLE LIFE PEARL YESSSSS god I love her so much, Pearl my beloved. I really leaned into Double Life Pearl's loneliness and abandonment issues mmmm <3

Hehehe gods yeah the emotional wreckage <3 poor Grian. I am putting him through it <3 Scar is such a sweetheart, he loves his Birdie so much, pain and delirium be damned <3 he gonna try to comfort Grian even if he's just about dying hhjkgkfdk

I very much enjoy destroying people emotionally so I am glad to see it landed right <3 Thank you for reading!! <3

[urijihoons-blog]

Bokuto: Clarity

/ Kōtarō Bokuto x reader /

genre: pure angst

wc: 1399

summary: It’s your anniversary with Bokuto and you surprise him at a tournament, but someone’s been lying to you.

warnings: sadness

a/n: Hehehehehe I wrote something and it’s full of ✨angst✨

///

All you can hear are the clicking of your shoes on the airport tile.

You’ve had this trip planned for a while, and have everything down to a t. You arrive at the airport right after his volleyball match ends, which by the excited texts he’s been sending you (and the fact that you followed the score online during your flight) his team won his match. Just as you assumed, you expected nothing less. You would grab food from this barbecue place around his hotel that he’s been talking about constantly every night you two FaceTime, and you would surprise him. You would spend this night together, watch his final match tomorrow, and explore the city in next couple of days.

You haven’t seen him in a while, 2 and a half weeks to be exact, because he’s been at this combo training camp/tournament. This distance, this time between you, it isn’t new. It’s his job, and you fully respect that. You still talked on the phone everyday, FaceTimed every other day, and texted constantly. He’s a very attentive person, especially when he misses you.

Tonight is no different. You FaceTimed him while secretly closing your bakery for the night, right before his semifinal game. You gave him as much encouragement as you could over the phone, knowing it still meant a lot to him to have your support. You received text messages immediately after the game, reading them while you sit in the taxi on the way to get dinner. His texts outline every detail, every spike, every rally, every wish that you could’ve been there in the crowd. But he understood why, he understands that you can’t just abandon your business, not for his volleyball game, even if it is your anniversary.

You look down at the ring, turning it over and over around your finger. That’s the whole reason you’re doing this anyways. You closed up shop early to be able to leave and celebrate his win and your 4 years of dating, which would come to an end because of your wedding soon. Butterflies flutter in your stomach just thinking about it.

The cab suddenly stops and you get out, leaving the money behind. You pick up his order quickly, taking brisk steps. You can see the hotel sign just a block down. Its only been a few minutes and you’re already in the building, going up the elevator. You check previous texts, ‘Babe, you know I always stay in room 428. Just in case you ever want to surprise me :) xx’ And, finally, you could do just that. Give him the love and support and encouragement in person, instead of through a screen. The thought of seeing him made you halfway sprint down the hall, your rolling suitcase struggling to stay on its wheels behind you.

You slow as you see the room numbers closing in. It’s happening. You stand in front of the door and look down at yourself. You straighten out your sweater and run your fingers through your hair, trying to look at least halfway presentable. He won’t care, he just misses you. He says it everyday, multiple times a day. He just wants you. Giving yourself this little reminder, you knock on the door. For a second, you realize he may be out with his teammates, but then you hear the shuffle of footsteps.

“-yeah, and this must be our room service!” He opens the door and stares at you in utter shock. Your eyes take him in. His hair was down and wet and you could smell his body wash from the foot of distance between you, he must have just stepped out of the shower. Shirtless, but had on basketball shorts. A normal night. His golden eyes were bright with surprise, but his body stiffened, and his face looked.. scared? Concerned?

Maybe he was just confused.

“Bo!” You beamed, taking a step towards him, “I missed-��

“What’d you get us?” You heard a smooth voice purr from behind him. Your muscles instantly went rigid, and your eyebrows furrowed. Who-

And then you saw it.

A slim hand crept around his torso from behind, a face suddenly appearing from behind his shoulder. Her hair was wet, and her smile dripped with poison. She wore nothing but a towel hugging tightly around her body, and her hair was wet.

Your eyes stung with tears, and you were seeing red. You pushed through them both, neither of them giving much resistance. Storming into the room, you go straight to the bathroom, snatch the unnamed girl’s clothing, making sure they were drenched, and walked back into the suite. Bokuto’s sitting on the bed, as still and silent as a statue, covering his face with his hands. The girl, who once looked at you with a little smirk, now looks at you in unbelief. You shove past her, open the door gripping her arm, force her into the hallway, and drop the sopping clothes at her feet. The door slams in the girl’s face before she can even begin to protest her exile.

Silence envelopes the room as your back slides down the door frame. You finally let out the sob that has been tearing at your throat, and Bokuto immediately looks up. Getting up from the bed, he takes careful steps and finally rests on his knees in front of you. “Y/N,” his voice almost breaking, but just as he tries to take your hand, you flinch. “Please.”

You shake your head, barely being able to look at him through the tears welling up in your eyes, the nausea and disgust filling your stomach. “no.” You barely let out, turning your face from him. You feel his hot tears fall onto your hands.

The silence returns, along with pain and regret. You sit there for God knows how long, and finally decide on your next move. As soon as you stand up, Bokuto is there beside you, trying to comfort you, trying to explain himself. His words are muffled to you, only bits and pieces come through what feels like a glass barrier between you two. You grab your purse, and take out the box containing his anniversary present. “it was only for tonight-“, “-means nothing to me”, “let me fix this”, “I can make this right”.

You stop dead in your tracks, you hand clutching the doorknob. You think over your next course of action, but continue on your way. You grab your suitcase, and stalk down the hall. He continuously tries to stop you without grabbing you, a fear of seeing you flinch under his touch. Instead, he tries to grab your suitcase, questioning you, “Where are you going?”, “Seriously, Y/N, where are you going?”, “Don’t go out there by yourself, it isn’t safe this late at night”, “let me go with you, I’ll keep you safe”. His words are still muffled to you, and you wonder if that will ever return back to normal. For now, that doesn’t matter. You don’t know if it will ever matter. You reach the elevators and press the down button.

“please say something to me, Y/N”.

That was clear, no muffle or fuzz to his voice. Crystal clear. There was a need in his tone, a desperate need, but what was it exactly? You decide not to dwell on it. Instead, you turn around and look at him one last time. His hair is tousled down, his eyes bloodshot and slightly puff from crying, and his face red and melancholy. His tall, muscular frame that normally stands tall and proud is slouched. He looks as though he’s lost. You reach out a hand to cup his face, running your thumb under his eye to catch the tears. Bokuto closes his heavy eyes, leaning into the warmth of your touch, grasping his hand over yours. The elevator door dings, it’s time.

“Happy anniversary, my love.” You whisper with a sad smile, feeling your own cheeks become wet with tears. You step onto the elevator before the door closes, before he can realize that you’re actually leaving, before he can stop you.

The face he made when he looked up in between the closing doors was one of horror. He took a step forward, “Please, I-“ was all you heard before they completely closed in on you. Leaving you as alone as you came.

///

Should I make a part 2? 🧐

Update: here’s part 2 :)