#hector y chavo

[unofficialkfamtranscripts]

King Falls AM - Episode Eleven: Ringin’ Hell’s Doorbell

View on Google Docs

Summary: October 1, 2015 - After an unexpected listener call-in, the boys find a cassette tape in the mail and listen live as an adventure unfolds from one of King Falls less-friendly hiking trails.

[podcast intro music]

[KFAM intro music]

Sammy Welcome back, everyone. The time is 4:44AM here at King Falls AM.

Ben It’s a slow night. You wanna do… weather and traffic?

Sammy It’s warmin’ up! And if there’s traffic at this ungodly hour, we got problems.

Ben *snickers* Got that right, Sammy! Uh, before we go back to the phones in a sec, I’ve got an email I’d like to read you. I think you’ll get a kick out of this. [definitely smirking]

Sammy Oh! Well, very cool. Alright, whatcha got?

Ben [eager] So, you know I wrote the producers of Mission Apparition, right?

Sammy … No. What are you talkin’ about?

Ben Yes you do. It’s that brain tumor of a show on Channel 13?

Sammy I-I- I know the show, Ben! I’m saying I didn’t know you wrote them.

Ben Dude. You’re gonna love it. I emailed trying to get them booked as guests so we could tear them apart. *snicker*

Sammy Well, I mean, they did keep the lights on a few weeks back, running an ad, of course. [not hopeful] So, please don’t tell me you got confrontational?

Ben If telling the truth about their staged scares counts as confrontational, then… [smug] I totally did.

Sammy Okay, so you accost a paid sponsor of King Falls AM; please continue…

Ben *excited laughter* Okay, let me read this to you. “Dear Sammy,”- [aside] sorry, you— left your station email up.

Sammy Uh-huh.

Ben “Dear Sammy, We at Mission Apparition are extremely sorry! you feel the show is “Overly Produced” and not “true to the nature of actual distressed spirits.” In actuality, Dan and Larry are two of the most highly trained professionals in this field. While we appreciate constructive criticism, name-calling just isn’t needed. If you have any real suggestions to make the show better, please let us know.”

Sammy Ben. [resigned] What did you call them?

Ben Doesn’t matter. What does matter is that I wrote them back, and they’re going to be shooting a future episode- of the show- in King Falls.

Sammy No way!

Ben I said “we have many fine spectral establishments here.” The gauntlet was thrown down and they took the bait.

Sammy As much as I hate to say this, you’re gonna get to see the Mission Apparition guys in a real situation at least.

Ben Oh yeah. [stoked] I’m not sure which to offer up the old Slaughter House off Cottontail Hollow or the library.

Sammy I’m not gonna make a you’re-trying-to-impress-Emily comment here, because I know that that place is chock full of activity.

Ben Exactly.

Sammy But… [semi-muttered] You are trying to impress Emily.

Ben *deep breath* Whatevs. K-ca- Okay, get this though! After I told them I was co-host of a late-night AM talk show? they asked if I’d like to come on set so I can get an interview live.

Sammy Well, book it! Make it happen!

Ben Done and done.

Sammy But please stop using my email.

Ben No promises.

Sammy Alright folks, after that exciting announcement, we’re gonna open up the phone lines to you, our dear listeners. And, uh, Ben? You got a topic?

Ben *tsk* I absolutely do, but you can’t have it until a touch after the 5 o’clock hour, Sammy.

Sammy You heard the man, ladies and gents. It’s a bonafide free-for-all for the next ten minutes or so. Give us a call 424-279-3858.

Ben Or hit us up on twitter @kingfallsam

Sammy Lucky Line 1, you’re live with Sammy and Ben.

Line 1 [deep, nasally, almost bestial voice] Uh, yeah… *heavy breathing, smacking lips* Did you check the mail? Heh

Sammy [mildly sarcastic] Maybe once or twice in my lifetime, uh, do you have a topic? Or is this Ted Kaczynski[1] calling from prison?

Line 1 Uh… you’ll have a topic sooon… heh… [ominous click, dial tone]

Ben Yoouu know I should go take a look in our mail slot now, right?

Sammy [exasperated] Don’t.

Ben It’s a verbal triple-dog-dare! I’ll be right back.

Sammy *sighs* One day, it’s just gonna be a head. I just know it. Line 5, welcome to King Falls AM.

[ominous music]

Line 5 [voice is male, higher pitched, and very nervous] Oh, I got through! Sammy?! I- I need to speak with you in private. Please!

Sammy Iii’m gonna be a little bit sir- we just came back from break. But I’m happy to talk about whatever.

Line 5 We really can’t talk about this on the air. Ehh *nervous breathing* It’s about… wwel-I- *quick sigh* - I really don’t wanna say too much, but— I sent you a text message about, uh…ohh…a month or so back? We need to speak! It’s incredibly urgent!

Sammy Sir, I get a lot of texts over the course of a month.

Line 5 W-well- we can’t talk about this on the air.

Sammy Who am I speaking with?

Ben [returning] We have mail, Sammy!

Line 5 [almost whispered] I turned the power back on…

Ben Mr. Thompson?

Probably Mr. Thompson Err— no! [click, dial tone]

Sammy Hello? Sir?

Ben What was that about? [laughing slightly] I swear that dude sounded just like my old science professor.

Sammy Can you get a number on line 5, Ben?

Ben … Yeah! Yeah… uh, in a minute! Look at this!

Sammy *laugh* Is that a cassette tape?

Ben Yeah. No letter— just a tape. It’s labeled “D.D.” [eager] We should play this.

Sammy I hope it’s Duran Duran.

Ben I’ll just stick this in… heeere.

Sammy Uh, do you think we should listen to that first? I know you got a trigger finger on the dump, but…

Ben [smugly] You’re looking at the fastest finger in the tri-state.

Sammy You know, there’s a dirty joke there that, for our friendship, I’m just gonna cruise- right on past.

Ben Where’s the play button on this hunk’a junk? Merv, why do we have a cassette player in the studio?! It’s 2015.

Sammy I think you know why.

Ben [hands rubbing together] I’m excited! [sounds of tape being inserted in the player]

Sammy You better be payin’ attention. I don’t want to hear one –

[TAPE PLAYS]

Lance [heavy Australian accent, narrating like a documentary] “This is Lance McCord checking in. I’m about 5 kilometers off the Stealth Ridge Trail now. It’s heavily wooded and just getting thicker.”

[stop click]

Sammy Do you know this guy? “Lance”?

Ben Never heard of him. But if the “R” word was politically correct for broadcast? I’d totally use it for him right now. That trail is like the boonies within the boonies.

[play click]

Lance “So far so good. I was- I was a bit worried with all the tall tales surrounding the ‘Devil’s Doorstep.’ I guess that’s why I’m talking to you; tracing my steps. Nothing strange or out of the ordinary. I have noticed a lack of wildlife and birds, to be this far in the bush.”

[stop click]

Ben … There is no way.

Sammy “The Devils Doorstep”?

Ben Definitely the R-word— or has a death wish! Or both!

Sammy Where is this place?

Ben [reluctant] It’s north of King Falls. It’s a dark-ass set of woods. Obviously, this guy isn’t from around here because he’d know you don’t even talk about it, much less go there.

Sammy Ominous…

Ben And We Don’t joke about it.

Sammy [challenge accepted] It sounds so inviting, The Devil’s Doorstep. What kind of Welcome Mat do you think the Dark Lord picks out? Do you think he has a “NO SOLICITING” sign?

Ben Stop it. I know you laugh about stuff like this, but… Don’t.

[play click]

[eerie siren-like singing in bg]

Lance “Right, about 30 minutes from my last check in. My mobile has lost signal. It- looks like it’s just you and me, pal. I lost a little bit of, uh, time. I got turned around a few minutes back. All the paths are starting to look really similar, so, it’s hard to… [ominous chant-singing in bg. there’s static/rustling/indistinct whispers that fades in and out] Still no wildlife. I don’t know if any men or women have ever stepped where I’m stepping. I kind of like that.”

[stop click, siren song stops]

Sammy Did you hear something there?

Ben NOPE! NO SINGING.

Sammy I didn’t say singing. I said something.

Ben I didn’t hear anything!

[play click]

[static or whispers in bg]

Lance “It’s getting colder now. Darker. That or my- mind is playing the tiniest of tricks on me. Voices, singing— whispers. It’s, uh– it’s head games. [siren song begins] Nothing’s gonna stop me from making it to the gate.”

[stop click]

Ben I think that’s enough.

Sammy Ben, honestly. “Gate?” I’m not following here. You’re the expert, what’s he looking for? Or- or why’s he even looking for it?

Ben COMMERCIAL TIME! Let’s do this…

[“exciting” sports channel music]

Announcer [Mexican accent] Weekdays! 6 to 9 AM, Listen to the Hector el Chavo Show! The fastest growing show in the fastest growing demographic in the tri-state area! On King Falls Deportes! AM. Every week, Hector el Chavo discusses your favorite sports with your favorite players! Don’t miss out this week. Monday we talk to Big Pine Striker, Javier Rancor. Tuesday we’ll talk to Saddle Creek midfielder, Jorge Carpe-Gutierrez! And Friday we talk to King Falls Goalie Bubba “Super Gringo” Wallis! Tune in to Hector el Chavo Show, King Falls Deportes on 730AM. Your sports capital for goal!!!

[KFAM theme music]

Sammy And welcome back to King Falls AM that’s 660 on the radio dial. We’ve just been listening to a tape we received anonymously. Apparently, there’s a hiker out adventuring in—

Ben [desperately, voice breaking] LINE 8, you’re live.

Finn Ooh boy! Things are getting tense on that tape, y’know?!

Ben Forget the tape! Ha-how-how’re you doing, Finn? Is everything— still intact?

Finn Doin’ swell, just swell! [scratching sounds]

Ben You okay there, Finn?

Finn Oh sorry! Didn’t think you’d pick that up. I’ve just been scratchin something awful the past couple weeks. I got in some poison oak, or— something – I don’t know!

Sammy Glad to hear you’re doing well, after…

Finn *growling* [scratching continues]

Ben [apprehensively] … You got a travel buddy with you tonight, Finn?

Finn Oh, no. [horn in bg] Just got cut off going down the highway, here. [muttered] Lousy drivers… [almost shouting] we got three other lanes y’know! [distracted] Ahh! Look at the food billboards!

Sammy Okaaay. Um, what’s on your mind tonight buddy?

Finn Ah, just callin’ in to say hi… that sorta thing. Plus, this story? Wooweee, who is this guy? Have you talked about this place before? I don’t think I heard you mention it… Uhh, I don’t think…

Ben Because we don’t, Finn.

Finn Spoooky stuff, fellas!

Sammy Yeeaah… I don’t know if you were–

Finn *howls loudly*

Ben I- I’m sorry. Yyou gotta keep your pup- quiet.

Finn [confused] Pup? No doggy here! Just you two fellas- and mee, rolling down the rooaad.

Sammy You don’t have a dog with you, Finn?

Finn Couldn’t if I wanted to. I’m allergic. [scratching]

Ben Are… are you feeling okay? Did you ever get checked out after that night you hit that… were— dog?

Finn What?! I wouldn’t lay hands on a pooch! Are you feelin’ alright, Ben?

Sammy *laugh* He’s talkin’ about the dog you accidentally hit awhile back. Uh, y-you got out to check on it and the call dropped off?

Finn Uh… Naooo, wasn’t me. Y’know, I think I’d remember somethin’ like that! [honking in bg, sound of semi passing] Dammit all, I gotta go, boys. Can’t scratch, drive, and talk at the same time. Finish that tape, it’s givin’ me the willies!

Ben Stay awake and- stay safe, Finn… Make a doctor’s appointment!— maybe…

Sammy Or a vet…

Finn *chuckles* Oh, you two! I’ll catch you later. *loud howl*

[click, dial tone]

Sammy Now, Ben. You know- I love what you do on this show. I wouldn’t wanna do this with anybody-else… BUT. I’ve got a tiny issue with you cutting to unscheduled breaks during conversations.

Ben [innocently] Did that happen? I’m so sorry, I just… I’m so interested in—

Sammy In doing everything but playing that tape. You got us all interested now, man. You gotta follow through.

Ben Okay– [definitely not having fun] it was fun! but I think we should just forget about it.

Sammy Impossible.

Ben S-sit down, don’t—

[play click]

Lance [wind gusting] “There’s no doubt that something is, uh, keeping me away from the gate at this point. [siren song in bg] My- watch has just stopped working, so I don’t know what time it is. I can’t really see the sun from the thickest overhangs to tell… I checked my compass [sing-chanting in bg] to ensure I was… [rustling] WHAT THE?” [creepy sing-chanting intensifies]

Super Creepy Whisper Voice “TURRRN. BAAACK. NOOOW.”

Lance “My fu[bleep]ing compass- is literally spinning like a top! There’s EVIL in these woods! You can feel it- in the air! It’s palpable!”

[stop click]

Sammy Ben! Don’t be mad!

Ben [seriously upset] We shouldn’t be playing this! This isn’t a joke, man! This is a tape that probably needs to go to the proper authorities! I’m gonna google Missing Persons.

Sammy Look, I’m not against that. But let’s finish this up, and at the very least talk to me. Tell us a little bit about the woods.

Ben If- if I tell you, will you stop playing the damn tape?

Sammy Absolutely! Help fill these last minutes until your actual topic of discussion arrives.

Ben *heavy sigh* The path, Lance is on, is called Stealth Ridge. It’s about a five-mile round-trip hike up north in- Perdition Wood.

Sammy You guys really know how to name things here.

Ben *deep breath* Okay, supposedly— as in, “legend-has-it” kind of talk, way off the beaten path— I mean WAY off, as in nobody’s ever seen it— is what he’s looking for. A cave called… [reluctant] “The Devil’s Doorstep”

Sammy Uh-huh.

Ben [agitated] Put two and two together here- Sammy! It’s an entrance to the gates of hell! Many people have went out looking for it! None have ever found it— SOME never return.

Sammy [softly] Have you been up there, Ben?

Ben Once…

Sammy And?

Ben Are you serious?! HELL NO, I haven’t been! I’m not crazy like Crocodile Dundee[1] on that tape.

Sammy I mean, he’s gotta be okay, right? The tape made it here! [getting nervous] I-it could’ve been him who dropped it off in our mail and called tonight! Right?

Ben This was fun for a minute, now it’s just massively creepy. Let’s move— [play click] SAMMY!

Sammy Du- you’re looking at me! I didn’t push the button!

[siren song]

Lance “It is so cold. [wind gusting] I’ve des-scended a great deal from the initial crest- of the ridge it seems … I saw what appeared to be—”

Super Creepy Whisper Voice “LAASST. WAARRNING. MORRTALLL.”

Ben TURN IT OFF!

[click of buttons being pressed on tape player]

[rustling/cracking in bg]

Lance “What the F[bleep] is that?!”

Sammy [sarcastically] Good job!

Ben Alright it won’t stop. Unplug it! I’m not kidding.

Sammy It is unplugged!

[creepy sing-chanting starts, chilling scream]

Lance *breathing hard* “It’s after me! … [calmer] Umm, I- I don’t know what that was. [song/chant continues in bg] I’m heading to the lip of this cove, here. I think I’m just gonna- wait it out- u-until morning. I’m wet, cold– I, uh, caught my jacket in the bush. I’m bleeding— Jesus… My, uh- my phone is missing. God dammit. It really is just you and— [rustling/cracking]

Super Creepy Not-Whisper Voice MEEE!!!

Lance “No! [impact noise] Help me!!” [sound of running, anguished scream from Lance]

[sing-chanting continues]

[KFAM outro music]

[CREDITS]

References

[1] Crocodile Dundee - Crocodile Dundee is a series of action comedy films centered around a crocodile hunter from the Australian Outback named Michael J. "Crocodile" Dundee.

[kingfallshistoricallibrary-blog]

Episode 11: Ringing Hell’s Doorbell

Sammy:

Welcome back, everyone. The time is 4:44 AM here at King Falls AM. Ben:

It’s a slow night. You wanna do…weather and traffic? Sammy:

It’s warmin up…If there’s traffic at this ungodly hour, we got problems Ben:

[chuckles]Got that right, Sammy. But before we go back to the phones in a sec, I’ve got an email I’d like to read you. I think you’ll get a kick out of this. Sammy:

Oh! Well, very cool. Whatcha got? Ben:

So, you know I wrote the producers of Mission Apparition, right? Sammy:

No… what’re you talking about? Ben:

Yes you do. It’s that brain tumor of a show on channel 13? Sammy:

I know the show, Ben! I’m saying I didn’t know you wrote them. Ben:

Dude, you’re gonna love it. I emailed trying to get them booked as guests so we could tear them apart. Sammy:

Well, I mean, they did keep the lights on a few weeks back running an ad, of course. So, please don’t tell me you got confrontational? Ben:

If telling the truth about their staged show counts as confrontational, then…I totally did. Sammy:

Okay, so you accost a paid sponsor of King Falls AM, continue…

Ben:

Alright, let me read this to you. “Dear Sammy,” sorry you left your station email up. Sammy:

Uh-huh. Ben:

“We at Mission Apparition are extremely sorry you feel the show is overly produced and not true to the nature of actual distressed spirits. In actuality, Dan and Larry are two of the most highly trained professionals in this field. While we appreciate constructive criticism, name calling just isn’t needed. If you have any real suggestions to make the show better, please let us know.” Sammy:

Ben. What did you call them? Ben:

Doesn’t matter. What does matter is that I wrote them back and they’re going to be shooting a future episode of the show in King Falls. Sammy:

No way! Ben:

I said we have many fine spectral establishments here. The gauntlet was thrown down and they took the bait. Sammy:

As much as I hate to say this, you’re gonna get to see the Mission Apparition guys in a real situation at least. Ben:

Oh yeah. I’m not sure which to offer up: the old Slaughterhouse off Cottontail Hollow or the library. Sammy:

I’m not gonna make a you’re trying to impress Emily comment here, I know that place is full of activity. Ben:

Exactly.

Sammy:

BUT…. You are trying to impress Emily. Ben:

Whatevs. Okay, okay, get this though! After I told them I was co-host of a late-night AM talk show, they asked if I wanted to come on set so I could get an interview live. Sammy:

Well, book it! Make it happen! Ben:

Done and done. Sammy:

But please stop using my email. Ben:

No promises. Sammy:

Alright folks, after that exciting announcement, we’re gonna open up the phone lines to you, our dear listeners. And, uh, Ben? You got a topic? Ben:

I absolutely do, but you can’t have it until a touch after the 5 o’clock hour, Sammy. Sammy:

You heard the man, ladies and gents. It’s a bonafide free for all for the next ten minutes or so.  Give us a call 424-279-3858. Ben:

Or hit us up on twitter @kingfallsam Sammy:

Lucky Line 1, you’re live with Sammy and Ben. Mr.X:

Uh, yeah… [heavy breathing]  Did you check the mail? Sammy:

Maybe once or twice in my lifetime, uh, do you have a topic? Or is this Ted Kaczynski calling from prison? Mr.X:

Uh….you’ll have a topic soon…[hangs up] Ben:

You know I should go take a look in our mail slot now, right? Sammy:

Don’t Ben:

It’s a verbal triple dog dare. I’ll be right back. Sammy:

[sigh] One day, it’s gonna be a head… I just know it. Line 5 welcome to King Falls AM. Mr.Thompson:

Oh, I got through! Sammy?! I – I need to speak with you in private. Please! Sammy:

I’m gonna be a little bit sir. We just came back from break. But I’m happy to talk about whatever. Mr.Thompson:

We really can’t talk about this on the air. It’s about…I really don’t wanna say much. I sent you a text message about…oh…a month or so back? We need to speak. It’s incredibly urgent! Mr.Thompson:

Sir I get a lot of texts over the course of a month. Mr.Thompson:

Well, we can’t talk about this on the air. Sammy:

Who am I speaking with? Ben:

We got mail, Sammy! Mr.Thompson:

I turned the power back on…

Ben:

Mr. Thompson? Mr. Thompson:

Err.. no! [hangs up] Sammy:

Hello? Sir? Ben:

What was that about? I swear that dude sounded just like my old science professor. Sammy:

Can you  get a number on line 5, Ben? Ben:

Uh, yeah, yeah, in a minute. Look at this! Sammy:

[laughs] Is that a cassette tape? Ben:

Yeah, no letter - just a tape. It’s labeled “D.D.” We should play this. Sammy:

I hope it’s Duran Duran. Ben:

I’ll just stick this in…here. Sammy:

Uh, do you think we should listen to this first? I know you got a trigger finger on the gun, but… Ben:

You’re looking at the fastest finger in the tri-state. Sammy:

You know, there’s a dirty joke there that, for our friendship, I’m just gonna cruise right on past. Ben:

Where’s the play button on this hunk of junk? Merv, why do we have a cassette player in the studio? It’s 2015. Sammy:

I think you know why. Ben:

I’m excited! Sammy:

You better be payin attention. I don’t want to hear one – Lance:

[Australian accent]This is Lance McCord checking in. I’m about 5 kilometers off the Stealth Ridge Trail now. It’s heavily wooded and getting thicker. Sammy:

Do you know this guy “Lance”? Ben:

Never heard of him. But if the “R” word was politically correct for broadcast, I’d probably be use it for him right now. That trail is like the boonies within the boonies. Lance: So far so good. I was- I was a bit worried with all the tall tales surrounding the ‘Devil’s Doorstep’ I guess that’s why I’m talking to you and tracing my steps. Nothing stranger or out of the ordinary. I have noticed the lack of wildlife and birds to be this far in the bush. Ben:

[stops tape] … There is no way. Sammy:

The Devil’s Doorstep? Ben:

Definitely the R word or has a death wish. Or both! Sammy:

Where is this place? Ben:

It’s north of King Falls. It’s a dark ass set of woods. Obviously, this guy isn’t from around here because he’d know you don’t even talk about it, much less go there.

Sammy:

Ominous… Ben:

AND we don’t joke about it. Sammy:

It sounds so inviting, The Devil’s Doorstep. What kind of Welcome mat do you think the Dark Lord picks out? Do you think he has a “NO SOLICITING” sign? Ben:

Stop it. I know you laugh about stuff like this, but…don’t. Lance:

Right, about 30 minutes from my last check in. My mobile has lost signal. Looks like it’s just you and me, pal. I lost a little of time I’ve been turned around a few minutes back. All the paths are starting to look really similar, so, it’s hard to…Still no wildlife. I don’t know if any men or women have ever stepped where I’m stepping. I kind of like that.

[singing in background] Sammy:

Did you hear something there? Ben:

NOPE. NO SINGING. Sammy:

I didn’t say singing. I said something. Ben:

I didn’t hear anything. Lance:

It’s getting colder our and darker. That and my mind is playing the tiniest of tricks on me. Voices, singing, whispers. It’s – it’s head games. Nothing’s gonna stop me from making it to the gate. Ben:

I think that’s enough.

Sammy:

Ben, honestly. Gate? I’m not following here. You’re the expert: what’s he looking for? Or… why’s he even looking for it? Ben:

Commercial time. Let’s do this… [ad]

Hector:

Weekdays 6 to 9 AM listen to the Hector y Chavo show, the fast growing show in the fastest growing demographic in the tri-state area. On King Falls Deportes AM. Every week, Hector y Chavo discusses your favourite sports with your favourite players. Don’t miss out this week, Monday we talk to Big Pine striker Javier Rincon. Tuesday, we are talking to Grassy Creek midfielder Jorge Papi Gutierrez and Friday, we talk to King Falls goalie Bubba Super Gringo Wallace. Tune in to Hector y Chavo show on Kings Falls Deportes at 7:30 am. Your sports capital for gooooooooal.

Ben:

He friggin hears it too

Sammy:

And welcome back to King Falls AM that’s 660 on the radio dial. We’ve just been listening to a tape we received anonymously. Apparently, there’s a hiker out adventuring in – Ben:

Line 8 – you’re live. Finn:

Oh boy! Things are getting tense on that tape! Ben:

Forget the tape! How- how’re you doing, Finn? Is everything still intact? Finn:

Doin’ swell, just well! [scratches skin] Ben:

You okay there, Finn? Finn:

Oh sorry! Wasn’t sure if you picked that up. I’ve just been scratchin something awful the past couple weeks. I got in some poison oak, or something – I don’t know! Sammy:

Glad to hear you’re doing well, after… Finn: [growls] Ben:

…. You got a travel buddy with you tonight, Finn? Finn:

Nah, nah – just got cut off going down the highway, here. Lousy drivers…we got three other lane you know! Ah! Look at the food billboards!

Sammy:

Um, what’s on your mind tonight buddy? Finn:

Just callin in to say hi… that sorta thing. Plus, this story? Wowee, who is this guy? Have you talked about this place before? I don’t think I heard you mention it. Uh, I think… Ben:

Because we don’t. Finn:

Spoooooky stuff, fellas. Sammy:

Yeah… I don’t know if you – Finn:

[howls] Ben:

Uh, I’m sorry. You gotta keep your pup quiet. Finn:

What? No doggy here. Just you two fellas, me… rolling down the road. Sammy:

You don’t have a dog with you, Finn? Finn:

Couldn’t if I wanted to. I’m allergic. [scratching] Ben:

Are… are you feeling okay? Did you ever get checked out after that night you hit that…weredog? Finn:

What? I wouldn't lay hands on a pooch! Are you feelin’ alright, Ben? Sammy:

He’s talkin about the dog you accidentally hit a while back. You got out to check on it and the call dropped off?

Finn:

Uh…. No, wasn’t me. I think I’d remember somethin’ like that [horns honking in background] Dammit all, I gotta go, boys. Can’t scratch, talk, and drive all at the same time. Finish that tape, it’s givin me the willies! Ben:

Stay awake and stay safe, Finn. Make a doctor’s appointment, maybe…. Sammy:

Or a vet… Finn:

hah, you two. Catch you later. [howls] [hangs up]

Sammy:

Now Ben, you know I love what you do on the show. I wouldn’t wanna do this with anybody else….but, I’ve got a tiny issue with you cutting to unscheduled breaks during conversations. Ben:

Do that happen? I’m so sorry, I just… I’m so interested in – Sammy:

Doing anything but playing that tape. Got us all interested now, man. You gotta follow through. Ben:

Okay – it was fun, but I think we should just forget about it. Sammy:

Impossible. Ben:

S-sit down, don’t – Lance:

There’s no doubt that there’s something keeping me away from the gate at this point. My watch has just stopped working so I don’t know what time it is. I can’t really see the sun from the thicket, it’s hard to tell. I checked my compass to ensure I was… WHAT THE -[singing] Eerie voice:

TURN. BACK. NOW.

Lance:

My fu[sensor] compass is literally spinning like a top! There’s EVIL in these woods! You can feel it in the air! It’s palpable! Sammy:

Ben! Don’t be mad! Ben:

You shouldn’t be playing this! This isn’t a joke, man! This is a tape that probably needs to go to the proper authority! I’m gonna google Missing Persons Sammy:

Look, I’m not against that. But let’s finish this up, and at the very least talk to me. Tell us a little bit about the woods. Ben:

If- if I tell you, will you stop playing the damn tape? Sammy:

Absolutely. Help fill these last minutes until your actual topic of discussion arrives. Ben:

[sighs]The path Lance is on is called Stealth Ridge. It’s about a five mile round trip hike up north in Perdition Wood. Sammy:

You guys really know how to name things here. Ben:

Supposedly, as in, legend-has-it kind of talk, way off the beaten path – I mean way off, as in nobody’s ever seen it – is what he’s looking for. A cave called The Devil’s Doorstep

Sammy:

Uh-huh. Ben:

Put two and two together here, Sammy! It’s an entrance to the gates of hell! Many people went out looking for it, none have ever found it. Some never return.

Sammy:

Have you been up there, Ben? Ben:

Once… Sammy:

And?! Ben:

Are you serious?! Hell no, I haven’t been! I’m not crazy like Crocodile Dundee on that tape. Sammy:

I mean, he’s gotta be okay, right? The tape made it here! It could’ve been him who dropped it off in our mail and called tonight, right? Ben:

This was fun for a minute, now it’s just massively creepy, let’s move – [tape starts] SAMMY! Sammy:

Dude, you’re looking at me! I didn’t push the button! Lance:

It is so cold. I’ve descended a great deal from the initial crest of the ridge it seems. I saw what appeared to be – Eerie Voice:

LAST. WARNING. MORTAL Ben:

TURN IT OFF!   Lance:

WHAT THE FU[sensor] IS THAT?!

Sammy: Good Job!

Ben:

Alright it won’t stop. Unplug it! I’m not kidding! Sammy:

It is unplugged! [scream from tape] Lance:

It’s after me! [singing in background] I – I don’t know what that was. I went in to look at this cove, here. I think I’m just gonna wait it out until morning. I’m wet, cold – I caught my jacket in the bush. I’m bleeding, Jesus. My- my phone is missing. God dammit. It really is just you and – Eerie Voice:

ME!!!!! Lance:

No! Help me!! [screaming] [singing]

[outro]

[jmvalerous]

Aventuras del ultimo día de clases (31/03/2017).

Todo comenzó como a las 5 de la tarde, yo me estaba muriendo de sueño, de hambre y cansancio. Estaba mareado y ya veía borroso, pero tenia que terminar todo mi trabajo y hacer extracciones de DNA en el laboratorio.

Pero era viernes, así que a esa hora todos suspendieron sus respectivas actividades y ya por fin pude irme, así que iba con Héctor comiendo un queso chihuahua que le habían regalado y en el camino desde el laboratorio hasta la estatua del caco, encontré muchos amigos, incluyendo a Diana y Astrid. Desde lejos me hablaban que fuera, así que fui corriendo y llegue hasta donde estaban, resultó que estaban viendo una capsula del tiempo que hicieron como evento para el día del Egresado en la facultad, en ese momento me dieron ganas de poner algo que valiera la pena, pero no tenia nada de nada, por eso, en ese momento pensé en tomarnos una fotografía, y a un chavo del grupo llamado Omar se le ocurrió ir a revelarla en City club. Así que fuimos Diana, Omar, Welsh y yo a City club.

Ya en City club, revelamos la foto y una copia para cada quien, aunque aun moría de hambre, así que fui con diana a ver que compraba para comers, luego, pasamos por un pasillo con puras señoras con muestras gratis de comida y fuimos a casi todas. Ya después compramos una bolsa de charrones y pues, técnicamente esa fue mi comida. Terminando eso nos devolvimos a la facultad para poner la foto en la capsula. Volviendo a la escuela, pusimos la foto en la capsula y aun seguían varios de los chicos de la foto, y todo estaba muy loco en la facultad! pusieron lunecillas y muchas mesitas con sillas, ademas de que pusieron a los de mesa directiva de meseros y había músicos tocando violines, todo por el día del egresado.

Entonces, entre los músicos que estaban tocando en la escuela, todos vestían con traje muy formales, pero, había uno con camiseta tocando así tal cual, y yo lo conocía! era un amigo que estaba buscando desde hace unos días. Terminó de tocar y me puse a platicar con el de unas cosas, para ese momento ya solo estaba presente Diana, Astrid y su Aramis, pero se agregó este chavo (Dalí) al grupo.

Fuimos al metro y todos terminaron yendo por caminos distintos, sólo quedamos Dalí y yo. En eso, nos encontramos al amigo que que estuvo en la fiesta de vinz y se unió a nuestro grupo. Íbamos todos para el mismo camión, así que nos subimos al camión y en eso me encuentro a Hector, un amigo con el que había ido al Museo Marco hace poco, y ya el grupo había cambiado completamente del que era al inicio. Entonces ya Hector y el amigo de vinz se fueron y continuaron su camino en el camión, mientras Dalí y yo nos bajamos para ir a su casa, porque quería que me ayudara con algo. Quería que Dalí me ayudara a terminar la canción que había hecho hace unos días, llegamos a su casa fuimos por su saxofón y luego en su carro pasamos a mi casa por mi guitarra. Por suerte, en ese mismo momento una amiga suya llamada Delcia lo invitó a ir a su casa, Dalí le dijo que si podríamos tocar ahí con ella, y dijo que si.

Resultó que era una casa con puras chavas, las amigas de Dalí eran cantantes, pianistas, violinistas y todo eso. Así que nos pusimos a ensayar la canción y les gustó demasiado. Les dije que era un regalo para mi chica, así que estaban entusiasmadas por escuchar y ayudarme si es que se podía.

Yo no las conocía a ninguna, pero me cayeron bien y nos hicimos amigos muy rápido. Y volvió a pasar el mismo suceso de antes, el grupo de amigos de ese momento había cambiado completamente por segunda vez. Entonces fuimos a comprar sushi mientras les explicaba como era la canción, ya después ensayamos un rato y esta fue la canción:  http://jmvalerous.tumblr.com/post/159103225230/feliz-cumplea%C3%B1os

Feliz cumpleaños, Tamara.

[tuseriesdetv]

Noticias de series de la semana: Apple renueva en masa

Renovaciones

CBS All Access ha renovado Why Women Kill por una segunda temporada

Disney+ ha renovado High School Musical: The Musical: The Series por una 2ª temporada

The CW ha renovado The Outpost por una tercera temporada

The CW ha renovado Pandora por una segunda temporada

Apple TV+ ha renovado For All Mankind por una segunda temporada

Apple TV+ ha renovado See por una segunda temporada

Apple TV+ ha renovado Dickinson por una segunda temporada

Apple TV+ ha renovado Little America por una segunda temporada

Apple TV+ ha renovado Home Before Dark por una segunda temporada

FOX ha renovado Bless the Harts por una segunda temporada

Disney Channel ha renovado Raven's Home por una cuarta temporada

Cancelaciones

NBC ha retirado Sunnyside de la parrilla en su primera temporada. Seguirá online.

NBC no encargará más episodios de Bluff City Law. Su cancelación dependerá de la audiencia en diferido.

Noticias cortas

Daniella Alonso (Cristal), Michael Michele (Dominique), Sam Underwood (Adam) y Adam Huber (Liam) serán regulares en la tercera temporada de Dynasty.

Sonya Walger (Molly Poole) y Krys Marshall (Danielle Poole) serán regulares en la segunda temporada de For All Mankind.

NBC ha encargado un episodio adicional de Sunnyside, once en total, para su emisión online.

El accidente de coche en el que se vio envuelta Helen Hunt, que no resultó herida seriamente, obligó a parar la producción del revival de Mad About You hasta el lunes, donde se evaluará la situación basándose en la disponibilidad de Hunt.

La producción de Cowboy Bebop se detiene durante entre siete y nueve meses por una herida en la rodilla de John Cho que requiere cirugía y rehabilitación.

Incorporaciones

Russell Tovey (Years and Years, Looking) protagonizará el thriller sobrenatural Because the Night. Será un hombre que lleva diez años huyendo de un secreto cuando alguien de su pasado (Bertie Carvel, Doctor Foster) se presenta en su puerta con noticias que desencadenan una serie de decisiones catastróficas. Les acompañan Amrita Acharia (Game of Thrones, The Good Karma Hospital), Nina Toussaint-White (Bodyguard, GameFace) y Paul Bazely (Benidorm, Critical).

Mackenzie Davis (Halt and Catch Fire, Black Mirror) y Himesh Patel (Yesterday, EastEnders) protagonizarán Station Eleven, limited series adaptación de la novela de Emily St. John Mandel (2014) para HBO Max que nos muestra a los supervivientes de una gripe devastadora mientras intentan reconstruir el mundo aferrándose a lo mejor de lo que se ha perdido. Serán Kirsten y Jeevan, dos supervivientes. Escrita y producida por Patrick Somerville (Maniac, The Leftovers). Diez episodios.

Se confirma la participación de Greg Kinnear (Little Miss Sunshine, As Good as It Gets) en The Stand interpretando a Glen Bateman, un profesor viudo con artritis que se une a Stu (James Marsden) en un viaje para conocer a Abigail (Whoopi Goldberg). Heather Graham (Californication, Angie Tribeca), Eion Bailey (Once Upon a Time, Band of Brothers), Katherine McNamara (Shadowhunters, Arrow) y Hamish Linklater (The Newsroom, Legion) serán Rita Blakemoor, una mujer adinerada que intenta escapar de Nueva York; Teddy Weizak, un superviviente acompañante de Harold (Owen Teague); Julie Lawry, una conquista de Lloyd (Nat Wolff); y el doctor Ellis, un coronel militar y especialista en enfermedades infecciosas.

Patton Oswalt (Veronica Mars, Veep) se une a la segunda temporada The Boys. Se desconocen detalles. Goran Visnjic (Timeless, ER) y Claudia Doumit (Timeless) serán recurrentes como Alistair Adana, el carismático líder de una misteriosa iglesia; y Victoria Neuman, una prodigiosa joven congresista.

Missi Pyle (Impulse, Mom) y Holley Frain (Gossip Girl, Grey's Anatomy) serán recurrentes en The Betty Broderick Story, la segunda temporada de Dirty John, como Karen Kintner, una esposa y madre divertida y carismática del círculo de amigas de Betty (Amanda Peet); y Evelyn Crowley, una amiga amable y comprensiva de Betty que está casada con un colega de Dan (Christian Slater).

Natalie Morales (Santa Clarita Diet, Parks and Recreation) será recurrente en la segunda temporada de Dead to Me como Michelle, una mujer que conoce a Judy (Linda Cardellini) en la residencia.

Justin Kirk (Weeds, Kidding) se une como recurrente a Perry Mason. Se desconocen detalles.

Jason Behr (Roswell) se une como recurrente a Roswell, New Mexico. Se desconocen detalles. Gaius Charles (Friday Night Lights) y Justina Adorno (Grand Hotel, Seven Seconds) serán recurrentes como Bronson, un granjero local; y Steph, una joven educada, brillante y mordaz que nunca pide perdón por ser como es.

Derek Cecil (House of Cards, Treme) y Max Beesley (Jamestown, Ordinary Lies) serán recurrentes en The Outsider, adaptación de la novela de Stephen King, como Andy Katcavage y Seale Bolton.

Stephen Lobo (Snowpiercer, Continuum) será el detective Jim Corrigan en el crossover del Arrowverse.

Naomie Harris (Moonlight, Collateral Beauty) y John Dagleish (Christopher Robbins, Mary Poppins Returns) se unen a The Third Day. Harris protagonizará la segunda mitad interpretando a Helen, una mujer firme que llega a la isla buscando respuestas.

Richard Flood (Shameless, Red Rock) será recurrente en la decimosexta temporada de Grey's Anatomy como el nuevo jefe de cirugía pediátrica.

Andrene Ward-Hammond (Claws, The Righteous Gemstones) y Ellen Tamaki (Charmed) serán recurrentes en la segunda temporada de Manifest como Kate Bowers y Drea Mikami, nueva capitana y nueva compañera de Michaela (Melissa Roxburgh).

Joe Minoso (Chicago Fire) será recurrente en la tercera temporada de Get Shorty como Hector, líder de una banda de Capotillo (República Dominicana) que controla el crimen en Los Ángeles.

Garcelle Beauvais (Siren, The Magicians) será recurrente en la segunda temporada de Tell Me a Story como Veronica Garland, una socialite y mujer de negocios casada con el padre de Simone (Ashley Madekwe).

Pósters

   Nuevas series

Path�� y Vendôme han adquirido los derechos del reportaje en exclusiva del The New York Times sobre el incendio que arrasó Notre-Dame y desarrollan una miniserie en colaboración con el periódico. Se grabará en inglés, aunque algunos personajes hablarán distintos idiomas. Se buscan guionistas y directores.

THR3 y Grupo Chespirito preparan un universo de series, películas y cómics sobre los personajes creados por Chespirito que empezará con una serie biográfica del actor, creador y protagonista de El Chavo del Ocho o El Chapulín Colorado.

Mark Boal (Zero Dark Thirty, The Hurt Locker) escribirá la limited series Fall And Rise: The Story of 9/11, basada en el libro de Mitchell Zuckoff, para ABC. Contará las historias de aquellos que murieron, se salvaron o cambiaron para siempre en el atentado.

Freddie Highmore (Bates Motel, The Good Doctor) escribirá y producirá junto al escritor británico James Mitchell la comedia negra Homesick que prepara TBS. Basada en las experiencias de Mitchell y centrada en la relación entre un veinteañero con un desorden alimenticio y su madre narcisista, explora temas como la salud mental, la imagen física, la masculinidad tóxica y lo que significa desafiar las expectativas de género.

HBO desarrolla The Most Fun We Ever Had, adaptación de la novela de Claire Lombardo (2019) que sigue a cuatro hermanas que luchan por existir a la sombra del idílico matrimonio de sus padres y cuyas vidas se complican con el regreso del hijo que una de ellas dio en adopción hace quince años. Escrita por Lombardo y Anya Epstein (The Affair, In Treatment). Producida por Amy Adams (Sharp Objects) y Laura Dern (Enlightened).

Sony Pictures TV ha adquirido los derechos de A Spark of Light, novela de Jodi Picoult (2018), para convertirla en una limited series. En ella, un hombre armado toma rehenes en una clínica de salud reproductiva y un negociador de la policía recibe un mensaje de su hija (Joey King; The Act, Fargo), que está dentro junto a una enfermera, una mujer herida, un doctor, una provida que se ha convertido en paciente y una joven que quiere interrumpir su embarazo.

BBC Two encarga seis episodios de The Witchfinder, comedia sobre un presuntuoso cazador de brujas (Tim Key; This Time With Alan Partridge, Brassic) y su inquisitiva y grosera sospechosa (Daisy May Cooper; This Country, The Wrong Mans) en su camino a un juicio por Anglia Oriental, al este de Inglaterra, en 1647, en un momento de guerra civil, hambre, peste, puritanismo, superstición y ganas de encontrar chivos expiatorios. Creada, escrita y dirigida por Neil y Rob Gibbons (This Time With Alan Partridge, Veep).

HBO Max encarga Grease: Rydell High, spin-off de Grease centrado en el instituto en los años 50, con personajes conocidos y nuevos y con grandes números musicales de la época y canciones nuevas.

CBS Television Studios prepara un revival de la película y la serie Clueless con el regreso de algunos personajes pero un tono más dramático. La nueva versión, escrita por Jordan Reddout y Gus Hickey (Will & Grace, Man with a Plan), se centraría en Dionne (Stacey Dash), que se convierte en la chica más popular tras la desaparición de su amiga Cher (Alicia Silverstone).

Fechas

La undécima y última temporada de Will & Grace se estrena el 24 de octubre

Guilt se estrena en BBC Two el 30 de octubre

La tercera temporada de No Activity se estrena en CBS All Access el 21 de noviembre

The Outsider se estrena en HBO el 12 de enero

Tráilers y promos

The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel - Temporada 3

Shameless - Temporada 10

The Man in the High Castle - Temporada 4 y última

Dickisnon

The Outsider

Atypical - Temporada 3

No Activity - Temporada 3

The Sinner - Temporada 3

[gbertea]

Bochas: 11° Provincial de Parejas 2ª Categoría.

Bochas: 11° Provincial de Parejas 2ª Categoría.

11º CAMPEONATO PROVINCIAL DE BOCHAS

2da. Categoría Parejas

Asociación Luque 2018

Del viernes 10 al domingo 12 de agosto se llevara a cabo el 11º Campeonato Provincial de Bochas 2da. Categoría modalidad Parejas, denominado “ROBERTO Chavo COMBINA”, y en homenaje a “HECTOR LUIS La Pocha CEAGLIO”, organizado por la Asociación de Bochas Luque y fiscalizado por la Federación de Bochas de la Provincia…

[fernandortizg]

Mis estimados y ficticios lectores; si ustedes por casualidad, en algunos otros años habían pasado por esta página en las fechas de septiembre, podrán haber notado que era mi sitio una tribuna en la que afirmaba, año con año, que el patriotismo en México no existe y que lo poco que medianamente hay, solo se presenta durante los quince primeros días de septiembre. Este año me cayeron el hocico.

Cada año presumí mi patriotismo y critique a quienes, por el simple hecho de hacer una peda con los cachetes pintados de verde blanco y rojo, presumían su orgullo de ser mexicanos, y cada año también los invité a seguir demostrando su patriotismo todo el año.

Para este 2017, tenía ya listo un artículo que, a Dios gracias, no terminé por falta de tiempo y que iba a llevar por nombre “Septiembre y el falso patriotismo”. ¡Qué bueno que no lo acabé!

Porque el pasado 19 de septiembre los mexicanos callaron mis llamados de patriotismo para demostrarme que de la mano con ese valor viene otro más importante: la solidaridad.

Y no hablo de la solidaridad como programa institucional de la que hablaba Salinas, sino de la que espontáneamente tomó las calles del país tras los sismos, primero el del 7 de septiembre en Oaxaca y con más fuerza en la Ciudad de México luego del terremoto del martes 19.

Hasta el cansancio se difundieron los videos de edificios cayéndose, de construcciones bailando, del gringo que no soltó la cerveza en Xochimilco, pero con el paso de las horas las redes encontraron una vocación más noble difundiendo los rostros de quienes salieron a ayudar.

Y vimos todos a los chavos que a las dos horas del sismo ya estaban levantando escombros con tal coordinación que sugería ensayos de meses; vimos al señor qué salió a repartir tamales gratis a los brigadistas, a la pareja de adultos mayores que regaló champurrado. Vimos a Frida y los binomios caninos de rescate; a los Topos, a los hipsters, a los fresas, a los millennials.

A los estudiantes de la UNAM que mientras organizaban brigadas cantaban el Cielito lindo. A los efectivos del ejército que marchaban por las calles de La Condesa en medio de aplausos. A las televisoras nacionales que, en medio de sus filias y fobias transmitieron ininterrumpidamente por más de 30 horas.

Y vimos también miles de centros de acopio en todo el país repletos no sólo de donativos, sino de manos, gente que hacía fila para ayudar un rato y demostrarle al mundo que no existe el cangrejo mexicano.

Vimos a las marcas que pusieron el ejemplo donando víveres: a Heineken México enlatando agua, a ADO transportando gratuitamente a voluntarios de protección civil o a Facebook, Google y Apple que donaron cuantiosas sumas en favor de la reconstrucción de nuestro país.

Vimos a los discapacitados ayudando; vimos caras de rescatistas irreconocibles por tanto polvo y cansancio, vimos la bandera nacional ondear mil veces… pero también vimos el llanto profundo de un soldado al no poder rescatar con vida a una de las víctimas del sismo.

Estas imágenes dieron la vuelta al mundo y estoy seguro que pasarán a la historia por ser un claro ejemplo de la fortaleza de los mexicanos. Por eso este septiembre hizo la diferencia. Por eso este mes y sus terribles acontecimientos me callaron la boca.

Es cierto, podremos no ser patriotas siempre, pero cuando lo somos, alcanza para todo el año. ¡Ya no dejemos de serlo!

  Fuerza México, canta y no llores.

  A person sits on the roof of a little house while looking at the rubble of a collapsed building after an earthquake hit Mexico City, Mexico September 20, 2017. REUTERS/Ginnette Riquelme

A tin can with the writing “We are with you” is seen at a collection centre for people affected by an earthquake in Mexico City, Mexico September 22, 2017. REUTERS/Jose Luis Gonzalez

MEXICO CITY, MEXICO – SEPTEMBER 21: Rescuers and volunteers work in a textile factory that collapsed two days after the magnitude 7.1 earthquake jolted central Mexico killing more than 250 hundred people, damaging buildings, knocking out power and causing alarm throughout the capital on September 21, 2017 in Mexico City, Mexico. The earthquake comes 32 years after a magnitude-8.0 earthquake hit on September 19, 1985. (Photo by Hector Vivas/Getty Images)

Rescue dog Frida looks on while working after an earthquake in Mexico City, Mexico September 22, 2017. REUTERS/Jose Luis Gonzalez TPX IMAGES OF THE DAY

Solidaridad y patriotismo: lo que el sismo nos dejó. Mis estimados y ficticios lectores; si ustedes por casualidad, en algunos otros años habían pasado por esta página en las fechas de septiembre, podrán haber notado que era mi sitio una tribuna en la que afirmaba, año con año, que el patriotismo en México no existe y que lo poco que medianamente hay, solo se presenta durante los quince primeros días de septiembre.