#headers turning red
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how many hoodies can i give this kid
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#itadori yuuji#yuji itadori#yuji mood continues with no signs of stopping ig#i love drawing folds on big ol hoodie sleeves gotta b one of my favourite items of clothing 2 draw#lmao idk if any1 remembers th band au that i was turning over in my head a year ago but ths where i got th hoodie logo idea#imaginary band merch. easter egg fr me and the 2 other people who were paying attention while i hyperfixated on tht au for a week#anyway i am wearing this yuuji i love him so much#this always happens sdhsdfj i draw myself a Dedicated Icon but then end up ditching it for some other random piece i finish the next week#2025 year of the yuuji ig#unless i fall in love w th next megu i draw and decide to go back 2 my roots which is always a possibility#u know ive been megumi on a dark red background for so long tht when i swapped i ws like. who is this who am i#i feel like im breaking dress code. betraying my brand image#its chill tho ill get used 2 it#helps tht it still more or less goes with my header and preferred colour palette#also lil pockey yuuji 2 match th gojo i did i LOVE this chibi style i want 2 put them in jars#maybe ill draw more and compile them all sitting in a line
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Maddie Simon Reunion Hug WHEN???
(If you like my art then please reblog it, also another version plus close ups are under the cut)



#the bestieism is strong with these two#'codependant much?' YES!!!!#i am so serious when i say that if they don't get a happy reunion where they hug for AT LEAST AN HOUR then i will RIOT!!!!!!#so serious about them i'm not even kidding#i'm happy to see wherever season 3 leads us i don't have many wishes but the one thing.. The One THING i NEED to happen is this!!!!#them reuniting and hugging and holding each other for forever!!!!!#thinking about the s1 scene where simon said something like 'i can't hug you but i can give you my jacket'#like#the ghost version of his jacket!!!#they want to hug so badly they are yearning for it imagine you can see and talk to your best friend but not touch them#not hug them not hold them when they're crying not even tap their shoulder to show them something i-#ahhhhhh they make me AHHHHH i'll never be normal about their friendship!!!!!!#lyxchen's art#anywayssss#i hope y'all like it :>#i really love how it turned out <3#might make this my header who knows...#school spirits#school spirits fanart#tried desperately to give maddie a different outfit to signal that she's you know.. alive but the red flanel is just so pretty on her <3#maddie nears#madison nears#simon elroy
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∿⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀🏮⠀⠀⠀⠀✶⠀⠀⠀⠀.⠀⠀⠀⠀♬



#gg moodboard#kpop layouts#kpop gg#kpop messy#kpop headers#kpop moodboard#moodboard#messy moodboard#messy icons#gg icons#gg layouts#alternative moodboard#turning red#turning red moodboard#turning red movie#mei lee#mei lee moodboard#disney#disney moodboard#red moodboard#green moodboard#pink moodboard
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your ability to turn every photo of Louis into black and red (and that too successfully) needs to be studied 🫡 love the new icon
hajwhuebsje thank you anon <3
I’m a little obsessed with that photo! it’s on my blog at least three times if not more, I was gonna wait for the rest of the HQ photos to drop (especially Joshua’s) before I changed my pfp but patience is not one of my strong suits 💀
look at him in that photo though 🫦 pure hot rockstar perfection
#anon#kind anon#also me turning all the photos red and black says more about how unhealthily attached to my header I am actually 🫣#I can’t get myself to change it#me & Louis 🫶🏽
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SUMMARY: The other Pillars are convinced Tomioka has something against the latest Hashira, but have no idea your husband is simply looking for you during your pregnancy. A/N: I think something glitched when I was making the header...didn't crop properly. Anyway, enjoy this trash and I'm sorry if it's not up to my usual standard but I just got the random idea in the middle of the night! WARNINGS: Fem Reader, pregnancy MASTERLIST/PREVIOUS FICS
Everyone was convinced Tomioka Giyuu hated you right from the start.
You were first introduced to the Hashira when Oyakata-sama called them all for a meeting on the latest reports of demon activity, but requested them all to stay a little longer before being dismissed. Amane gestured for you to come forward with a gentle smile and you shuffled out of the shadows with your hands clasped together in nervousness but with a bright bream upon your face. The Hashira’s eyes caught yours in surprise, wondering if you were perhaps a new Kakushi since you weren’t wearing a slayer uniform, but instead a traditional (f/c) yukata.
Then their eyes strayed downwards and changed their minds about that, but nonetheless still remained in confusion.
“This is our newest member, (y/n) (y/l/n), the (b/f) Hashira. She was supposed to join our ranks quite some months ago but due to her sudden pregnancy she will for now be an honorary member.”
The only sign of your anxiety was the blush on your cheeks and the hand rubbing at your swollen abdomen. “Hi everyone! I’m so happy to meet you all! I won’t be on the battlefield for some time and I’m sorry I can’t fight alongside you for now, but I look forward to getting to know you all. If you need anything, I’m always at the (e/n) Estate.”
The ice was broken and you were immediately approached by many of the Hashira. Himejima-san cried and wished you and your child good health, making you feel a little embarrassed but thanked him anyway. The Mist Pillar Tokito simply stared at you, then at the sky, then at you again before asking what were you doing here again (later on, he startled you by appearing behind and questioning you in that airheaded manner of his if he could talk to the baby).
You were also tackled by the Love Pillar who introduced herself as Kanroji Mitsuri and your new best friend as well as the calmer Insect Pillar, Kocho Shinobu, who despite slightly unnerving you with her smile touched you greatly when she said you could always stop by the Butterfly Mansion for checkups or simply a visit.
“How far along are you?”
“About five months, I think!”
“KYAAAAAAAAAAH! Your baby is going to be so cute! What’s it’s name? Do you know if it’s a he or a she yet? I can’t wait to be an aunt!”
“Heh, I’m not too sure yet, but I have a feeling it’s going to be a boy!”
Mitsuri squealed again, causing you to laugh at her genuine happiness. She whipped her head behind her and called out to the silently glowering Snake Pillar. “Iguro-san, don’t you think the baby will be cute? I really wish I’ll have some of my own one day!”
You and Shinobu shared a smirk as the Wind Pillar grumpily slapped his friend’s back and dragged the furiously red Iguro away, muttering viciously about not wasting any more time in hunting a Twelve Kizuki.
“Oh look, there's Tomioka-san. Why hasn't he come and said hello yet?”
“Ah well, a lone friendless wolf as always.” Shinobu didn't see you originally visibly brighten at Mitsuri’s words and turn surprised at hers.
Indeed Tomioka was standing awkwardly as always a little - long, actually - way off. What was not as always was that horrified, slack jawed look on his face instead of his usual blank, emotionless one.
“Tomioka-san? Are you alright? You've been making that face for a long time already…” Shinobu's eye twitched, but you didn't notice, suddenly preoccupied with Muichiro’s intense questioning of whether he could play with the baby when it was born.
“She shouldn't be a Hashira.”
The remaining Hashira found themselves narrowing their eyes at the Water Pillar's blunt, if not rude, words.
That would be just one of the many events that further convinced them of his intense dislike of you.
***
You started going over a lot to the Butterfly Mansion over then next few months, becoming a fast favorite among the girls for your cheerful attitude and your baby; even Kanao cracked a smile at you when you came around. When the other Hashira arrived to be healed you always made it a point to go pay them a visit and in turn you pretty soon had every one of them in your back pocket, including the harsh, loudmouthed Wind Pillar Shinazugawa who constantly gave you a jolt with the complete 360 with his attitude around you, to the point you could call him a good friend.
Being friends with him usually meant hearing him grumble about the stupid waterboy.
“Why doesn’t he ever look at you anyway, turning away like that. So rude, that little (beep) (beep) (beep)-”
“Eheh, Shinazugawa-san, don’t swear so loudly, he’ll hear you!”
You had stopped by to Sanemi’s room when Shinobu had mentioned he was there to be patched up after a mission and knowing how busy she was, had offered to go help change his bandages with the basic medical knowledge you had picked up over the years of being a slayer. Reluctantly she had agreed and so here you were, chatting away with him until he spotted Tomioka passing by (he poked his head in actually, otherwise Sanemi would never have noticed him) and started complaining about him once more, especially when you had called out to him and Tomioka had simply whipped his head to the side to stare into the distance.
Really, Sanemi wasn’t the only one to notice how Tomioka avoided you like the plague with that stupid, vacant, red expression of his.
“He’s just shy, he doesn’t mean to be rude!” You defended the poor Pillar, continuing with rewinding the new wrappings.
“Tch, you should see how he acts at the meetings, like he’s better than us or something,” was the growling reply. “(beep) doesn’t know how to (beep) talk with anyone with his (beep) attitude.”
“I don’t think he thinks he’s better than all of you, maybe it’s just something else,” You hum, finishing up. “That’s all! I’m glad the demon didn’t go any further than a scratch.”
Shinazugawa grunted, then his gaze caught yours and softened. “By the way, who’s the dad?”
“Oh, it’s -”
“(y/n)-san!” Three heads peeked in from the door shyly. “Can you come and play with us?”
“Of course! Bye, Shinazugawa!”
Like always the reply was only a “tch”.
***
Another thing was that he never stopped repeating what he said at the first time everyone met you: “She shouldn’t be a Hashira”, going as far as to attempt to prevent you from wielding a sword, although this was only noticed by Tanjiro.
You had agreed to the Kamaboko Squad’s requests (aka demands by Inosuke and begging from Zenitsu) to train together, despite Tanjiro’s worries which you brushed off. The boys were very rambunctious and did tire you out quite a bit, but you were having so much fun and they were so eager you just went on sparring with them until even Inosuke muttered a plead for a quick break, unable to beat your incredible swordsmanship.
“(y/n)-chan!!! Who’s the lucky guy you married?! You never told us and I want to know how he managed to score someone so beautiful like you so I can do it with Nezuko-chan!” Zenitsu simpered, scooting closer, ignoring Tanjiro’s scandalized look.
“What’s married?” Inosuke’s voice was muffled underneath his boar mask and the mountain of onigiri you had brought he was stuffing into his mouth, so none of you heard him.
You giggle, placing a hand on your stomach. “He’s very sweet, although he’s honestly very shy and doesn’t talk much. I’m sure you’ve met him before! Can you guess?”
“Woah, really?” Tanjiro brightened, wondering who it could be, but his next question was interrupted by an interrogative monotone.
“What are you doing? You shouldn’t be training.” Tomioka stood in front of them, the first time anyone had seen him interact with you without just staring at the ground. His face was as empty as the void but there was a tiny crease between his eyebrows and Tanjiro didn’t have to inhale to smell the worry reeking off him.
“I didn’t know you were so concerned about (y/n)-chan, Tomioka-san.” Zenitsu’s eyebrows shot up, disappearing under his hair while he glowered judgmentally.
Tomioka made no reply, only swiftly grabbing and removing the sword from your hand. “She shouldn’t be a Hashira, much less train. You nearly died fighting a demon not too long ago, you’re in no shape to be doing this.”
With that he abruptly walked off and left Zenitsu and Inosuke to scream at him for being such an un-gentleman and for not fighting with them while you looked away sadly.
Tanjiro wondered why he didn’t once smell dislike on Tomioka. Only fear.
***
“What’s he got against (l/n)?” Obanai joined in on the conversation from his perch on the tree. He’d look for reasons to hate against the Water Pillar all the time, but unlike the others this time round his hatred was justified.
Tengen rolled his eyes flamboyantly. “I know! He’s constantly acting like she’s a pest to be around, but she doesn’t seem to have beef with him. What’s wrong with that bland creature?”
“Oh come on! We don’t actually know if he hates her,” Rengoku protested mildly.
“Then why does he keep refusing to even make eye contact with her?”
“I mean, Iguro, you can’t talk, you only ever look at Kanroji” - Obanai turned away, blushing furiously as Tengen cackled - “but I get your point. The other day I walked in on them arguing. I can’t believe he would keep reminding her of past failures without keeping her current state in mind!”
“Perhaps he only wants to try and convince her to stay safe during this time and discourage her from slaying for now?”
“Rengoku, my best buddy, you’re too optimistic.”
“There’s no other reason he’d give her the cold shoulder 24/7.”
Soon the conversation drifted to other topics, but little would they know Rengoku was the closest to the truth…
***
Shinobu already had enough on her hands with all the screaming, panic and blood, but of course Tomioka just had to show up at the most inopportune moment.
It had been a relatively quiet day as the two of you sat on the engawa, exchanging war stories over tea when with a sudden cry you had doubled over in pain. Your water had broken and you were heading into labour - quickly.
Just barely the Insect Pillar had managed to get you to a bed and sent the Butterfly Girls scurrying for the necessities, hiding her uneasiness at the slight earliness of your boy’s arrival to keep you calm and help you through it. You were doing well under her coaxing to use Total Concentration Breathing, and thankfully Shinazugawa was still around to help you relax with a familiar face.
Then Aoi had burst in with a frantic expression and thundering footsteps from behind that certainly weren’t hers.
“Shinobu-san, Tomioka is demanding to be let in-”
“Keep him out!” Shinobu grimaced, returning her attention to you. She’s heard and seen what he’s like around you, and other than the fact he has no business to be here she didn’t want to send you into a further state of panic. “He doesn’t like her, and if he opens that mouth of his to say anything more I might be responsible for two deaths.”
You dug your nails into Sanemi’s proffered hand, screaming in pain. He winced but said nothing, only looking up with a determined look in his eyes at Shinobu. “I’ll go keep Tomioka out, just make sure she delivers safely.”
Without waiting for a reply Sanemi rushed out to bar the doorway, leaving Shinobu to assure and handle your birthing with the anxious assistance of the Butterfly Girls. The pain in your stomach was surely abominable, intolerable, and Shinobu found herself growing more alarmed with every minute the baby wasn’t coming out.
“(y/n), I need you to push harder, alright? Can you do that for me?”
“N-no - where is he?”
“Your husband? I’ll get someone to call him, don’t worry,” Shinobu lied with dawning horror that in the entire time she had known you…she had no actual idea who you were married to. “But he wouldn’t like you see you like this, right? You can do it. Just keep your breathing under control.”
“JUST (beep) OFF, TOMIOKA!” Shinazugawa’s voice bellowed through the Mansion. His stocky form soon appeared, stubbornly acting as an indomitable barrier against the equally stubborn Tomioka who was desperately trying to barge his way through.
“Tomioka, we don’t need unnecessary people here to worry (y/n) more-”
”THAT’S MY WIFE!”
Whether it was because Tomioka had never raised his voice before or the sheer shock of it all or the fact you reached out for his hand, Shinobu and Sanemi let him through.
***
“I thought I was going to lose you when I heard you screaming like that from outside.” Giyuu nuzzled deeper into your neck, absently stroking your baby’s tiny hand. “Don’t scare me like that again.”
You played with the strands of his hair with a teasing smirk. “You did to, banging into the room like that, with the “That’s my wife!”. It was very romantic of you, Giyuu~”
“I was in a rush.” Giyuu smacked his face into the pillow, embarrassed while you laugh.
“Ara ara~ Are you both done cuddling? I want to perform a quick checkup on your baby now, if you don’t mind, and all the Hashira are here to ask you a lot of things, Tomioka.” Shinobu stood at the doorway with her customary smile, a twitching eye and crossed arms. Behind her were the shadows of the others trying to peek over her shoulder or head into the room to congratulate you on your baby or beat up Tomioka (both for some).
“Ask about what?” Giyuu lifted up his head in confusion. You snort at his obliviousness, cooing at your precious sleeping baby before gently passing him to Shinobu.
“MAYBE ABOUT HOW (Y/N) IS YOUR WIFE AND YOU NEVER TOLD US?”
“KYAAAAAAAAAH! That’s so cute of you, Tomioka!”
“Do you hate us all or something?!”
“No…? No one asked and I thought (y/n) would have told you,” Giyuu said blankly, glancing at you with wide blue eyes. You sheepishly raised your shoulders.
“I tried to tell them but we kept getting interrupted or had no chance.”
“You did make us all think you hated (y/n) with your behaviour, Tomioka.” Shinobu raised an eyebrow. “After all, you rarely spoke to her and when you did it was only to reprimand her, but I can see now it was probably out of worry for your child and her…although rather harshly.”
“Oh!” You burst out laughing, shaking so hard you nearly couldn’t take back your awakening baby Shinobu was handing over. “Giyuu’s just very shy! See-”
You pressed a quick peck to his cheek.
giyuu.exe has stopped working.
#giyuu x reader#giyuu x y/n#giyuu x you#giyuu tomioka x reader#giyuu tomioka x y/n#kny x reader#giyuu x reader fluff#Sunny's Works
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“CRY BABY — jason todd.
PAIRING ! jason todd 𝒙 fem!reader SYNOPSIS! your boyfriend’s here, doesn’t matter if you need him during an important task. you need him now so that’s what he does; he shows up. WORD COUNT! 2.6k WARNINGS / TAGS! fluff, mention of reader’s hair + lmk if more found ! NOTES! based on this req.!! header bellow belongs to @/v6que © ahqkas — all rights reserved. even when credited, these works are prohibited to be reposted, translated or modified
THE GROCERY STORE WAS UNUSUALLY CROWDED FOR A FRIDAY EVENING, the fluorescent lights overhead buzzing faintly as you shuffled through the small grocery shop. You grabbed a cart and slowly pushed it past the holiday display at the entrance. The pine garlands and cinnamon-scented candles filled the air with cheerfulness of the holidays that felt out of place for your mood. The day had been fine, but a little . . . heavy, like the edges of everything you did were frayed. Shopping for groceries was supposed to be routine, calming even, but tonight it felt more like a chore.
You started in the produce section, eyeing the dark red apples stacked neatly in pyramids. Jason liked apples, especially sliced up with peanut butter, and you didn’t have any at home. You grabbed a few, along with a small bag of clementines—they were on sale, and the idea of peeling one later sounded comforting. You added some spinach to the cart, though you weren’t ure what you’d do with it yet.
The next aisle had the coffee and teas. You hesitated in front of the shelves, scanning for Jason’s favorite blend. He always said he didn’t care what kind of coffee it was as long as it had caffeine, but you knew he liked the dark roast with the smoky flavor. So, you grabbed a bag and tossed it into the cart before picking up a box of black tea for yourself.
In the dairy section, you grabbed a carton of eggs and some milk, along with a tub of the fancy Greek yogurt Jason pretended to hate but always ate half of when you weren’t looking. You added a block of cheddar cheese too, because he always complained when you didn’t have any “real cheese” in the fridge.
Finally, you grabbed a loaf of bread and a box of pasta before heading to the candy aisle. You’d been eyeing the peppermint bark in the holiday section earlier but didn’t grab it. Now you plucked a small bar of it off the shelf and dropped it into the cart. A little indulgence couldn’t hurt.
The cart wasn’t full, but it was enough. Enough to get through the week, enough to stock your kitchen for the nights Jason decided to stay over and make himself at home. He didn’t live with you—not officially—but his presence lingered in your apartment like a second heartbeat.
You made my way to the registers, where the lines were moving slowly. It was late, but the store was still busy, the energy of people rushing to finish errands before closing time crackling faintly in the air. You took your place in line, watching other customers inch forward and fiddling with the edge of your scarf.
It wasn’t a bad day, you reminded yourself, just a heavy one. You would unload the groceries back at home, make some tea, and settle in for the evening. Maybe you’d call Jason later, hear his voice and let the rough warmth of it carry you into something softer. The thought made the corner of your mouth twitch up in the faintest smile. And maybe he could even stop by, spend the night.
That thought warmed your heart.
The line at the register moved slower than you expected, giving you too much time to stand there, awkwardly fiddling with your scarf and glancing at your cart. The apples and kettle chips sat next to each other, an odd little pairing that made you think of your boyfriend. He’d swipe one of each, snack in hand, smirking like he’d outsmarted the whole grocery system.
Finally, your turn came, and you pushed the cart forward. The cashier was a lanky teenager with a mop of greasy hair tucked under his name-tagged baseball cap. His name tag read Trevor, but his expression read bored in bold letters. He glanced up at you briefly, his eyes darting over your cart with the kind of disdain only a teenager could muster before going back to his phone.
“Hey,” you greeted the kid politely, smiling despite yourself as you began unloading your groceries onto the conveyor belt.
“Yeah, hey,” Trevor muttered, clearly distracted as he shoved his phone into his pocket. He hit a button on the register with a little too much force and sighed loudly, like the very act of being here was an affront to his existence.
You handed over the loaf of bread first, thinking maybe you could set the pace for a smooth interaction. Trevor grabbed it and scanned it without a word.
“Paper or plastic?” he asked flatly, not bothering to meet your eyes.
“Um, paper, please.”
Trevor reached for the bags, shoving the bread in haphazardly before grabbing the apples next. The bag tipped slightly, the loaf threatening to crumple. You winced internally but said nothing, figuring it wasn’t worth the trouble.
As he scanned the rest of your items, you started to pull out your wallet. Your fingers fumbled for a moment as you searched for your debit card, the silence stretching uncomfortably.
“Do you, like, need the receipt?” Trevor mumbled under his nose, tossing it into the bag before you could answer.
“Um—yes, please,” you said quietly, slipping your card out of the wallet at last.
The teenager rolled his eyes, exhaling loudly. “Next time, maybe have it ready? Kinda holding up the line.”
The words hit you like a splash of cold water. You froze for a moment, face flushing as you quickly swiped your card through the reader. Your hand trembled just enough to make you fumble again, and you could feel the heat of embarrassment crawling up your neck.
“Sorry,” you mumbled, not daring to meet his eyes as you hurried to finish.
Trevor didn’t respond to you anymore. “Next!”
You grabbed your bags as quickly as you could, your vision blurring slightly as you turned away from the register. Your chest felt tight, the weight of the embarrassing moment pressing against the bones of your ribs as you hurried out of the store.
By the time you reached your parked car, the tension had built to a boiling point. You set the bags down in the passenger seat and slid into the driver’s seat, closing the door behind you with a soft click. The space felt safe, isolated from the world, and as soon as you were alone, the tears spilled over.
It wasn’t just the kid or his tone—it was everything. The way the week had dragged on endlessly, the tiny moments of frustration piling up like bricks until this one insignificant encounter became the tipping point.
You pressed your palms against the steering wheel, breathing uneven as the tears came in quiet, hot streams. They weren’t loud or desperate, just a release, a way to let go of the tension that had been weighing you down all day.
After a few minutes, the sobs subsided, leaving you feeling raw but lighter. You wiped at your face with your sleeve, sniffing softly as you leaned back against the headrest. The worst of it was over, but the ache lingered, a reminder of how fragile the balance could be sometimes. What you needed now was something solid, something warm to remind you the world wasn’t as heavy as it seemed.
Reaching for your phone, you scrolled through your contacts, thumb hovering over his name for a moment before you pressed it. The line rang twice before his voice came through, low and rough but tinged with familiarity and care. Jason always had a way of grounding you, his voice a tether when the world felt too loud.
“Hey, sweetheart,” he said, his tone already softer than usual. “What’s going on?”
And just like that, the weight in your chest started to ease.
“Hi,” you said, the word wobbling despite your best effort. “Are you busy?”
There was a beat of silence, the kind that told you he’d caught on. Jason’s voice shifted, quieter but firm, like a hand on your shoulder. “No, I’m not busy. You okay? You sound . . . upset.”
You hesitated, the urge to downplay it bubbling up. “I’m fine,” you said quickly, though you knew it wasn’t convincing. “Just . . . had a moment. Nothing big, I promise.”
“Sweetheart,” Jason interrupted gently, his voice like a steady anchor. “Don’t do that thing where you act like it doesn’t matter. Talk to me.”
You sighed, resting your head against the window now. “I don’t know,” you admitted. “It’s stupid. A cashier was kind of rude, and it just . . . got to me. I cried about it in the car, and I feel better now, but I guess I just—” Your voice cracked, and you exhaled shakily. “I wanted to hear you.”
Jason didn’t respond right away, but the silence wasn’t heavy. It was the kind of pause that said he was listening, thinking about the best way to hold you from a distance. When he spoke again, his tone was warm and firm, a voice that could steady mountains.
“First of all, it’s not stupid,” he said. “People can be jerks, and it’s okay to feel what you feel. You don’t have to justify that to me—or to anyone.”
A small smile tugged at your lips despite yourself. He always had a way of cutting through the noise in your head, finding the simplest truth in it all. “Thanks,” you murmured.
“Where are you?” he asked. “Still in the car?”
“Yeah,” you admitted. “Just . . . sitting in the parking lot.”
He hummed softly, the sound almost like a purr through the receiver. “Okay. Here’s what we’re gonna do. Take a deep breath for me—nice and slow. Can you do that?”
You nodded before realizing he couldn’t see you. “Yeah,” you said softly, following his instruction. The air filled your lungs like it hadn’t in hours, grounding you.
“Good,” Jason praised. “Now, I’m on my way to you. Sit tight, and don’t you dare think about apologizing for needing me.”
“Jason,” you started, but he cut you off.
“Don’t ‘Jason’ me, sweetheart. You’re my girl. That means if you need me, I’m there. Simple as that.”
The lump in your throat returned, but this time, it was different—softer, less heavy. “Thank you,” you whispered.
“Always,” he replied, and you could hear the faint sound of him grabbing his keys. “Now stay where you are. I’ll be there soon. And when I get there, I’m giving you a hug so big, you’re gonna forget what the cashier even looked like.”
You laughed softly, the warmth of it surprising you. “I’d like that.”
“Good,” Jason said, his voice lighter now. “I’ll see you soon, baby. Just hang tight for me.”
The call ended, and though the ache hadn’t fully disappeared, it was quieter now, tempered by the knowledge that he was coming. Jason didn’t just make the world feel manageable—he made it feel safe, like no matter how overwhelming the little things got, he’d always be there to pull you back to solid ground.
Ten minutes later, a sharp, sudden knock on the car window startled you out of your thoughts. You jumped in the seat, heart leaping into your throat as you turned to look—and there he was, standing outside in the cold, his broad shoulders hunched slightly against the wind. Jason’s cheeks and nose were flushed a soft pink from the winter air, and he had one hand shoved into the pocket of his leather jacket, the other gesturing for you to roll the window down.
You blinked, processing his presence as he gave you a small, crooked smile through the glass. “Come on, sweetheart,” he called, his voice muffled but still rich and warm, like it carried all the heat you’d been missing. “You gonna let me freeze out here or what?”
Scrambling, you fumbled with the controls and rolled the window down halfway. “Jason? What are you doing here?” Your voice wavered between shock and something lighter, something closer to relief.
He gave a soft huff, his breath visible in the cold air. “You really think I was just gonna sit around after that phone call? Get outta the car, baby.”
You hesitated for a moment, the weight of the earlier tears still clinging to you, but his steady gaze left no room for argument. With a sigh, you grabbed your scarf and pushed the door open, stepping out into the biting cold.
As soon as you were standing in front of him, Jason’s hands found your shoulders, his touch firm but gentle as he guided you closer towards him. “You okay?” he asked, his voice low and earnest, his green eyes scanning your face like he was trying to read all the parts of you you hadn’t said aloud.
You nodded, but the way your chin trembled betrayed me. “I’m fine,” I responded quietly, even though the words felt flimsy. “I was feeling better after we talked, really. You didn’t have to come all the way out here—”
Jason cut you off with a soft, knowing sound, one of his hands moving to brush a stray strand of hair from your face. His touch lingered, his knuckles warm against your cheek. “Yeah, I did,” his tone left no room for debate.
For a moment, the two of you stood there, the cold wrapping around you but unable to penetrate the bubble of warmth his presence created. His thumb grazed your cheekbone, and you realized you had been leaning into his hand without thinking.
“You’ve been crying,” he said softly, the observation carrying no judgment, only quiet understanding. “You don’t have to pretend with me, y’know. Not ever.”
The lump in your throat returned, but it was smaller now, manageable. You took a shaky breath and gave him a faint smile. “I just felt stupid crying over something so little. I didn’t want to bother you.”
Jason’s brows knit together, his expression turning almost stern. “Hey,” he exclaimed, tilting your chin up so you had to meet his eyes. “Your feelings aren’t little. And I told you—no matter what, I’m here. You don’t bother me, alright?”
You nodded, swallowing hard as the weight of his words settled over you like a blanket. His sincerity had a way of melting through all the self-doubt you carried, leaving only the quiet reassurance of his steady presence.
“Good,” he said after a moment, his hand dropping to take yours instead. He laced your fingers together, his grip firm and grounding. “Now, give me your keys.”
You blinked up at him. “What?”
He smirked, his nose still adorably rosy from the cold. “You’re not driving, sweetheart. Not when you’ve had a day like this. I’m taking you home.”
“You didn’t bring your bike?” you teased faintly, trying to lighten the mood.
Jason snorted. “In this weather? Hell no. Now quit stalling and hand ’em over.”
Reluctantly, you pulled the keys from your pocket and dropped them into his waiting hand. He gave you an approving nod before tugging you toward the passenger side door.
“Come on,” he said, opening it for you like the gentleman he only pretended not to be. “Get in. I’ll crank the heat for you.”
As you slid into the seat, Jason closed the door behind you and walked around to the driver’s side, his movements easy and confident despite the chill. When he settled in and started the car, the warmth of the heater began to fill the space, and for the first time that evening, you felt completely safe.
Jason reached over, brushing his hand across your thigh in a gesture so casual yet intimate it made your chest ache. “See? Already better,” he said, glancing at you with a lopsided grin.
And as the car pulled away from the parking lot, the groceries safely tucked in the back and Jason by your side, you couldn’t help but think he was right.
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I need lando ANGST. Make me cry! But also smut! Goshhhh I need it. Something like they’ve been distancing each other and things have been so tense and one day lando catches reader getting herself off so he says ‘if you wanted me to fuck you all you had to do was ask.’ And then he ruins here. But lots of angst in the beginning. Ty I love you xx
Endings, beginnings | LN⁴

💌 REQUESTED by anon ──── Well. I was sobbing while writing this. Hope you're proud of yourself 💔
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𐙚 summary ──── They’re at a breaking point in their relationship, their stubbornness and jealousy pushing them so close to the edge. After agreeing to distance each other during an exhausting triple header, Lando returns home unexpectedly to find her in his apartment, trying to cope with his absence.
𐙚 pairing ──── Lando Norris x she/her reader
𐙚 rating ──── explicit
𐙚 category ──── F/M
𐙚 warnings ──── +18, mature/sexual content, angst, smut, toxic dynamics, emotional distress, descriptive language, masturbation, oral & fingering ─ (f)receiving, unprotected sex, swearing, potential relationship breakdown.
𐙚 word count ──── 5.1k
𐙚 date ──── Dec. 12, 2024
𐙚 a/n ──── This is my 10th work ayeee! Thank you guys so much for investing your time into reading my silly little stories, and for trusting me enough to bring your requests to life. I appreciate you a lot 🤍🎀
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IT'S LATE. THE kind of hour that turns Monaco into a still painting, muted and hollow, yet as breathtaking as ever.
Lando isn’t supposed to be home yet. The plan was to stay in Brazil for a couple more days after the race, but plans change when you're a professional overthinker. Somewhere between the chaos of three back-to-back races, he couldn’t stand the thought of another night in a hotel.
He needed to be in his own space so he could think.
The elevator ride to his floor seems like going on forever, his suitcase dragging heavily behind him, its wheels scratching aggressively against the polished floors the second he gets out of it. He’s expecting silence; an empty apartment, untouched, heavy with the ghosts of their last argument. But when he opens the door, the faint smell of her perfume hits him hard across the face, and his heart tightens.
His living room is dimly lit, the soft glow of a scented candle casting long shadows on the walls. A throw blanket is draped over the couch, and a half-empty mug of tea sits forgotten on the coffee table.
And then he sees her.
She’s curled up on the couch, wearing one of his oversized hoodies. Its sleeves cover her hands as she hugs her knees to her chest, her face partially hidden in the dim light of the room. Her hair is a little messy, and there’s a redness to her eyes that tells him she hasn’t been sleeping well — he knows he shouldn't, but he's glad he isn't the only one losing sleep over this. On a deeper level, it means they both care enough to let it consume them.
So, it has to count for something, right?
For a moment, he just stands there, staring. Then, the words spill out before he can stop them, or think of something else to ask, “Why are you here?”
Her head snaps toward him, her wide eyes betraying a mix of surprise and guilt. She looks like a deer caught in the headlights, frozen in place.
She straightens slightly, pulling the hoodie tighter around herself. “Lan…” she blinks in amazement, her voice barely audible.
“I just asked you a question,” he says, sharper than he initially intended.
He's not usually like this. But considering how they left things before he had to go, Lando is entitled to ask questions. It was her suggestion to separate, and finding her here only messes with his head more.
“I… know. I'm sorry,” she looks away, her fingers tugging at the hem of the hoodie. “I didn’t think you’d be back so soon.”
“I wasn’t planning to,” his suitcase thuds against the floor while he fixes his eyes on her. “Why are you in my apartment? We said we’d take some time apart.”
Her shoulders hunch defensively, but her voice remains the same as he knows it — soothing, carrying so much tenderness that it could stop wars. “I didn’t know where else to go.”
Lando exhales harshly, nodding while dragging a hand through his curls. “We agreed on space, remember?” he insists, “You can’t just show up here like nothing happened.”
“I didn’t—show up,” she snaps, her tone suddenly sharper. “I’ve been here for a while. I didn’t know you were coming back so soon,” she repeats.
“Okay, then. Let me get this straight. You're here, but you don’t answer my texts anymore,” he fires back. “Does that make any sense to you? ‘Cause it sure as hell doesn't for me.”
“I was going to,” she retorts, standing now, the oversized hoodie swallowing her frame.
Lando takes a step forward, his hands on his hips. “I don't understand you. I thought this was what you wanted,” he says, his voice quieter but no less intense. “Space. Time. A chance to figure out if we even work anymore.”
“Yes,” the girl agrees, “I wanted to figure us out, not pretend we don’t exist.”
Lando's voice rises, his frustration spilling over, “You think I’m pretending? I’m doing what I thought you wanted! Because every time we’re together, we just end up—”
“Fighting,” she finishes bitterly. “Yeah, I know. Do you think I enjoy feeling like this all the time?”
His shoulders slump slightly, the fight draining out of him. “I don’t know,” he admits, his voice softer now. “I don’t know what to think or do anymore.”
They stand there in silence, the weight of their shared frustration pressing down on them. She sits back down on the couch, clasping her hands on the edge of it.
When she finally speaks again, her voice cracks. “I don't want to fight, Lando. I’ve been staying here because I couldn’t be in my own place. Everywhere I looked, I saw you. I thought maybe if I stayed here, it would make sense to feel your presence, because it's your place.”
Lando’s jaw tightens as he lets her words sink in. The sight of her, wearing his clothes with tears in her eyes makes his chest ache. He wants to wrap himself around her and make sure nothing will ever hurt her again, but the ego works a double shift tonight.
Still, “I'm not mad that you're here,” he clarifies. “But why didn’t you tell me?” asks Lando quietly.
“I didn’t think it would make a difference,” she whispers. “I planned to leave before you… Well, it doesn't matter now.”
“See, that right there is the fucking problem. Of course it matters! Why wouldn't—”
“Because!” her firm voice interrupts him. “We keep hurting each other, and I honestly don’t think we'll ever stop. You’re stubborn and selfish, and I’m jealous, and we both jump to the worst conclusions about each other all the fucking time.”
Lando sighs, “Right,” he says after a pause, his voice laced with guilt. “I am stubborn and selfish,” he agrees, “I get angry too fast. Is that it? And you—you think I’m always looking for a reason to leave.”
Her breath catches as she looks down at a random point on the floor. “Aren’t you?”
The words hit him like a punch to the gut. He steps much closer, his voice firm. “No. I’m not. But you make it so damn hard to stay sometimes.”
He regrets his words the second they leave his mouth. He's aware that she's not the only one to blame for the situation that they're in, but at the moment, he's making it seem that way. He can't look at her hurt expression, so Lando closes his eyes for a second, a long silence settling in the distance dug so deeply between them.
She continues to look at him, anger flaring in her eyes. “Yeah, well, you make it hard to trust you, Lando. Every time you’re away, I feel like I’m waiting for the other bomb to drop.”
He finally opens his eyes, rubbing a hand over his face. “Alright, what do you want from me, hm?” he asks. “I don't know what you expect me to do.”
Her voice breaks as she replies, “I don't have any expectations left. I just want to stop feeling like I’m losing you all the time.”
Lando’s face softens, the exhaustion from weeks of racing and months of fighting etched into every line. He steps closer, slowly, until he’s standing in front of her. He crouches down so they’re eye level, his expression conflicted.
Even as hurt as she is now, he is still amazed by her beauty. Gazing down at him, she spreads her legs gently so she could make more room for him in her space. However, she's doesn't dare to touch him, no matter how badly she needs to feel him, just to remind herself that he's real.
“I'm so fucking tired, baby,” says Lando, his voice breaking slightly. “Aren’t you tired?”
She nods, a tear slipping down her cheek. “Every day, especially when you're not here,” she chokes out. “But I still want to try. God, Lando, I can’t imagine not trying.”
His hands reach for hers almost instinctively, but he acts with the same hesitation, pulling back at the last second. She notices, the flicker of hurt on her face evident in the way she squeezes her eyes shut, only to erase that image from her memory.
They sit in silence for a while, the air thick with unresolved issues and the weight of everything they can’t say. He studies her, trying to think ahead, but it’s impossible when she's like this — indecisive and lost.
Finally, Lando stands up, exhaling sharply. “I need a shower,” he mutters, heading toward the bathroom without another word.
She watches him go, her heart sinking. She’s still here, but somehow, it feels like she’s further away from him than ever. All she wants to do is jump into his arms and tell him she's missed him so much these past few weeks. Tell him how much she loves him, and that she would do anything to see him happy and satisfied with their life together. But she's too far away, and if she doesn't jump high enough, she could find herself free-falling, with no one to catch her on the other side. And that's too much of a risk, even for her.
When Lando comes back, his hair damp and his expression unreadable, she’s standing by the window, looking out at the city lights.
She doesn’t turn when he approaches, but she speaks softly, her voice small. “Do you even want me here?”
Lando freezes, her question cutting deeper than he expects. After a long pause, he answers, his voice low. “Of course,” he says. “But I honestly don’t think it's a good idea.”
She finally turns to look at him, her eyes searching his face. “Yeah…” the girl nods slowly. “I just—Lando. I can’t keep doing this if I’m the only one who believes we can make it.”
Lando nods. “Thing is, I don't know what to believe anymore,” he says honestly, his voice steady.
A simple truth that neither of them wants to acknowledge. But even as the words hang in the air, neither of them moves to leave. Because for all the pain, there’s still something tethering them together — something they’re both terrified to lose.
“I’ll take the couch,” he finally says, tugging the throw blanket off the armrest. His voice is flat, drained of the emotion that had filled it earlier.
“What?” she asks, startled.
“You can have the bed,” he clarifies, avoiding her gaze as he starts arranging the blanket. “It’s late. We’re both tired, and this… we can’t fix this tonight. We should rest and talk it out in the morning.”
She opens her mouth to protest, the words forming instinctively, but then she stops herself. He looks so tired, not just physically but emotionally. His shoulders are tense, his jaw set in that stubborn way she knows so well. He’s trying to create the space she's been asking for — not because he doesn’t care, but because he does.
“Okay,” she ends up saying, her voice small. Defeated. Once again.
At that, Lando turns to meet her eyes, his expression serious, almost distant. It’s a side of him she doesn’t see often, the version of Lando that’s careful and guarded. She hates it, hates the way it makes her feel like a stranger to him. But mostly, she hates that she’s the one who’s brought this out in him.
“Goodnight,” he says softly, his voice tinged with a finality that makes her stomach churn.
Alright then.
“'Night,” she replies, walking past him, their arms touching lightly.
She retreats to his bedroom, closing the door quietly behind her. The familiar scent of him — clean, musky, intoxicating but soothing, grounding her with its quiet presence and making her feel more at home than ever — wraps around her as she crawls into the bed they’ve shared so many times before. But it feels different now, colder, emptier. Foreign, somehow.
For a stupid, silly moment, she lets herself believe that things will be okay in the morning. That they’ll talk, really talk, and find a way back to each other. She clings to that thought as she stares up at the ceiling, her fingers clutching the edge of the blanket. But no matter how hard she tries, she can't shake the feeling that this is it.
Neither of them sleeps for hours after that.
IT'S FOUR IN the morning when Lando lies on the couch, his eyes fixed on the darkened ceiling as his thoughts race. He can hear the faint creak of the bed when she shifts, knowing she's not asleep, either, and it tugs at something deep inside him. He’s never been good at leaving things unfinished, and this is no different.
He pushes himself up from the couch for what feels like the hundredth time, his fingers curling and uncurling in frustration.
Maybe this whole thing was a mistake.
Maybe he shouldn’t have come home.
Maybe this is exactly why they need space, because when they're in each other's proximity, he simply can't think straight. Especially when she's just a few feet away, separated by only a simple door.
A door that masks the sounds of her soft cry.
Then, he hears the same faint sound, broken, but unmistakable. It cuts through his doubts like a knife through butter, sending a sharp pang of guilt and something deeper, a lot darker, straight to his chest. He hesitates for only a moment before moving toward the bedroom, his steps careful, almost hesitant. His hand hovers over the door, his heart pounding against his ribs as he takes a deep breath in.
Lando knocks softly, his voice barely louder than the quiet hum of the apartment. “Is everything okay?”
Nothing.
He knocks again, his jaw tightening.
The silence presses against him, thick and suffocating, until he can’t take it anymore. He twists the knob and pushes the door open, his pulse roaring in his ears as his eyes adjust to the dim light.
She’s sprawled on his bed, the sheets tangled around her hips, one hand clenched in the fabric while the other moves between her thighs. Her head is tilted back, her lips parted in soft, shaky gasps, and her eyes are squeezed shut like she’s trying to block out the rest of the world.
His throat goes dry, his emotions colliding in a chaotic storm of shock, desire, and something dangerously close to anger. Not anger at her — it never is — but at the situation, at the rift between them that’s left her seeking comfort this way. And at himself, for not being able to fix it.
He should walk away. He knows he should. But instead, he steps into the room, his movements slow and calculated as he crosses his arms over his chest, watching her intently.
Her eyes snap open, and for a moment, she looks utterly petrified. Her cheeks flush a deep crimson as she scrambles to sit up, her legs snapping shut as she fumbles for words.
“No, don’t let me interrupt you,” says Lando, his voice low and rough.
“You scared the shit out of me, Lando,” she stammers, her voice trembling. “I thought you were…”
Asleep.
“And I thought you were crying,” he says, wetting his lips. “Well, I was right in a way.”
The words hang heavy in the air, and she looks away, her hands twisting nervously in the sheets. He hates the way she shrinks under his gaze, but he can’t stop himself from taking another step forward. His jaw tightens again. He doesn’t know what to say or do, circling back to the same feeling.
He doesn’t know what he’s supposed to feel, either — hurt, anger, longing?
So much lust.
The silence stretches between them until it’s almost unbearable. And then, finally, she moves, swinging her legs off the bed like she’s about to leave.
But he doesn’t let her.
His hand shoots out, grabbing her ankle and tugging her back toward the edge of the bed. Her gasp echoes in the quiet room, her wide eyes locked on his as he steps between her legs, his grip firm but not forceful.
“What are you doing?” she whispers, her voice shaky, a mix of uncertainty and... hope that she already knows the answer.
“Fuck if I know,” he admits. His hands slide up her thighs, spreading them apart again, and he drops to his knees in front of her. “But I can’t just… I can’t leave you like this.”
“Baby,” she breathes, her tone caught between a plea and a warning.
“Let me take care of you,” he murmurs, his lips brushing against the sensitive skin of her inner thigh. “Please. I can't take this shit anymore.”
At the sound of his pleading, she reaches out, her fingers threading through his hair as her breath hitches. It’s all the permission he needs to press his lips to her warm entrance, soft and tentative at first, but when she arches into him, her body trembling beneath his touch, something inside him snaps.
Lando doesn’t hesitate once she gives in, her fingers tightening in his hair as her thighs tremble against his shoulders. His hands grip her legs, his touch firm but reverent, holding her open for him like he’s afraid she’ll change her mind.
The first swipe of his tongue over her slit is slow and deliberate, tasting her in a way that makes her breath hitch. He hums low in his throat, the vibration sending a shockwave through her that has her head falling back against the mattress.
“Lan…do,” her voice breaks on his name, a soft moan that sends a shiver down his spine.
“Always so sweet for me, love,” he exhales heavily, her scent intoxicating.
Lando's grip on her thighs tightens as he pulls her closer, his tongue moving with purpose now, circling her clit and flicking in a rhythm that makes her toes curl. The erotic sounds from between her legs make her close her eyes in pleasure, her pussy tightening around him with each intentional stroke of his tongue. He’s thorough, so meticulous, as though he’s trying to commit every whimper and every twitch of her body to memory.
“That's so good, Lan. Feels so good,” she lets out a string of moans, her eyes rolling as the air gets knocked out of her lungs. “Oh, god, I've missed your mouth so much.”
She traces her hand through his hair, holding him while her hips push forward, the bridge of his nose tickling her clit so sweetly. He wants to drown in her, to lose himself in the way she responds to him, every single time.
Each gasp feels like a lifeline, tethering him to something real, something he can hold on to when everything else feels so uncertain. Her fingers curl in his hair, tugging slightly as her hips begin to move against him, chasing the friction he so willingly gives. Lando's jaw clenches at the way she’s unraveling for him, and he redoubles his efforts, his tongue flicking faster, more insistently, as he pulls out to suck gently on her clit.
“Baby, please,” she's almost crying, her voice shaky, but still cutting through the air like a plea for salvation. “Need you… so close.”
Lando doesn’t stop. He can’t. Especially not when her legs start to tremble against him, her breathing becoming erratic as she teeters on the edge. Instead, he slides one hand from her thigh to her hip, pressing her down slightly to keep her steady while his other hand moves swiftly to where he has been tongue-fucking her. His long fingers slide gently through her wetness, curling inside as he finds the spot that makes her see stars.
She feels herself opening wider for him, then clenching harder while he adds just enough pressure to make her body tense, his tongue never ceasing its rhythm.
“Lando, I—” her words dissolve into a broken moan, and he knows she’s close.
His heart pounds in his chest as he keeps going, the sound of his fingers fucking in and out of her pussy blending so beautifully with the noise of his tongue lapping at her clit. He doesn’t care how long it takes; he’ll stay between her thighs forever if he has to. He won't move again until she falls apart beneath him. For him. Maybe then Lando will understand why he needs her so much, why the thought of losing her feels like losing a piece of himself.
When she comes, it’s like the world stops from spinning. Her body tenses, her thighs trembling as she cries out his name, over and over again, her release washing over her in waves. He should pull out and give her time to ride out her orgasm, but his tongue and fingers coaxing her through it, making her gasp for another breath, is sending shocks of ecstasy to his hardened cock. In his desperate attempt to relieve his pain, he rubs himself against the bed, but it is not nearly enough.
Finally, when her hands are falling limply from his hair, that's when Lando slows down his movements. He presses soft kisses against her inner thighs as he pulls back slightly, his hands gently stroking her soft legs.
“You alright?” asks Lando, his voice raw.
She looks down at him, her chest heaving as their eyes meet. There’s something vulnerable in his gaze, something that makes her throat tighten. His lips are swollen and glossy, his chin slick and glistening from her arousal. His breathing is as unsteady as hers, his chest rising and falling rapidly as if he’s just run a marathon. The sight of him like this — completely undone and yet so devastatingly composed — makes her stomach clench with need. More need.
“Mhm,” she manages, heat rising from her chest to her cheeks, while her hand involuntarily travels back between her own legs.
Lando slowly wipes the wetness from his chin with the back of his hand, his eyes never leaving hers. The motion is deliberate, almost taunting, as if he wants her to remember every second of her high. Then he rises to his feet, his big frame towering over her as he leans forward, bracing himself on either side of her hips. Her breath catches as he hovers above her, so beautiful and wrecked, his face so close that she can feel the warmth radiating from his skin.
She expects Lando to kiss her, her lips parting slightly in anticipation, but instead, he tilts his head and murmurs, his voice a low rasp that sends a shiver down her spine.
“If you wanted me to fuck you, all you had to do was ask, baby,” his unfiltered voice makes her heart race in her chest. “I don’t care that we’re fighting. It doesn’t matter how tired I am,” he continues, his eyes dark and piercing as they lock onto hers. “I’ll stop anything, drop everything, just to fuck my needy girl, yeah?”
The bluntness of his words, paired with the raw intensity in his voice, leaves her momentarily speechless, the pads of her fingers collecting whatever is left from her release. She whimpers softly, her lips parting again as she brings her fingers to his, pushing inside his mouth while watching his pupils dilating. Lando sucks on them with the same thirst as earlier, biting softly when she tires to pull out. At that, something inside her snaps. She surges up, her hands gripping the back of his neck as she pulls him into a fierce, desperate kiss.
His lips are warm and soft, slick with the taste of her still lingering there, and she can’t help the way she moans into his mouth. He groans in response, deep and guttural, as his tongue slides between her lips, claiming her in a way that makes her stomach flip.
It feels like fire and desperation, like he’s trying to pour all of his frustration into one single kiss. When his tongue moves against hers, she whimpers, the sensation achingly familiar yet entirely overwhelming. It feels like he’s everywhere, like he’s consuming her from the inside out, and she doesn’t want it to stop. Ever.
“Lan,” she moans into his mouth, “Please…”
Her pleading seem to break something in him. Lando pulls back just enough to meet her gaze, his lips curling into a slow, crooked grin, making her realize how bad she's missed seeing it. There’s something tender yet profoundly sad in his expression, though, a quiet heartbreak that makes her chest burn.
“Please, what? Hm, what do you need?” he murmurs, his hand tracing a soft, reverent path down her body.
His fingers graze her collarbone, her ribs, her hip, each touch filled with a tenderness that feels almost out of place amidst the heat between them. But she doesn’t care about the sadness or the hesitation. Not right now. She arches into his touch, her hands clutching at his shoulders as she's whispering nonsense, too drunk on him to make more sense than that.
Lando’s breath mingles with hers, his lips brushing hers in the faintest of kisses as he whispers, “You aching for me, baby?”
Her nod is small, almost imperceptible, but he feels it, and his hand slips down to her hip, grounding her. The weight of his touch is familiar, comforting even, and it sends a tremor through her body that she doesn’t try to hide.
“Hurts so bad,” she admits, her voice cracking as her eyes meet his.
“I know,” he nods slowly, his voice thick with emotion. “Can I me make it better?”
“Always.”
He presses his lips to hers fully now, a slow, lingering kiss that feels like a balm against the ache between them. It starts soft, tentative, as if they’re testing the waters, but quickly grows deeper. His tongue sweeps across her bottom lip, and she opens for him, sighing into his mouth as he kisses her with all the longing, irritation, and so much love that he’s been holding back.
His hands move with purpose, sliding under the hem of her shirt — his shirt — and pushing it up, exposing her bare skin. She gasps as his palms graze her sides, his touch igniting a fire that spreads through her veins.
Lando pulls back just enough to tug the shirt over her head, his eyes darkening as he takes her in. “My beautiful baby,” he says, almost like he’s reminding himself that she still belongs to him and vice versa.
Her cheeks flush, but she doesn’t look away. Instead, she reaches for him, her fingers tugging at the hem of his own shirt. He helps her, pulling it off in one fluid motion before pressing his chest against hers, their bare skin meeting in a way that feels like coming back home after a long, tiring trip.
They move together like this, slowly shedding the layers between them until there’s nothing left but their bodies and the weight of everything they've done wrong.
He lowers her onto the bed, his lips never leaving hers as he settles between her legs. The warmth of his body, the solidity of him, makes her feel anchored, even as the storm inside her threatens to consume her. And when he enters her, it’s heaven, deliberate, like he’s savoring every inch of her. She moans, her hands flying to his shoulders as he stretches her, filling her with his perfect length. He stills for a moment, his forehead pressed against hers as they both adjust to his size.
“Remember how easy it used to be?” he whispers.
She nods while his lips are brushing her temple. “Yeah. I remember.”
The first thrust is painfully slow, managing to pull a soft moan from her lips. But soon enough, Lando sets a rhythm, one that feels familiar, almost nostalgic, like they’re trying to recapture the simplicity of how things used to be. She matches him, her hips rising to meet his, their bodies moving together in perfect sync.
As the pace builds, so does the intensity and vulnerability between them. The kisses become messier, more desperate, and his thrusts deepen, driving into her with a force that feels like a mix of anger and love.
“I don’t want this to be the end,” he says suddenly, his voice cracking as her nails dig into his back, leaving crimson lines in their wake.
“No?” she asks, a little hesitant.
His movements falter for a split second before he recovers, his eyes locking onto hers. “God. No, baby,” he says, his voice thick with determination. “We can fix this. I swear we can.”
Tears well in her eyes, and she can see his own glistening in the obscure lighting. They’re both breaking, and yet neither of them wants to let go.
Lando thrusts harder now, the force of it making her cry out as her body arches beneath him. She meets him halfway, her legs wrapping around his waist as she pulls him deeper inside her, as close as humanly possible. The room fills with the sounds of their bodies slapping against each other, their breathing, and their muffled cries.
“I need you,” she whispers, her voice barely audible over the rush of their movements. “Like this, all the time. Only you.”
“You have me,” he replies, his voice breaking. “You’ll always have me, you know that.”
“Promise me,” she demands as she starts clenching around him, the heat building once again inside her.
Lando gasps at the feeling, fucking into her harder. “Shit, baby. I promise you. I promise.”
The weight of his words pushes her over the edge, her release hitting her harder the second time around. She cries out, tears streaming down her face as her body shakes beneath him. He follows moments later, his own climax tearing through him as he buries his face in her neck, his shoulders trembling with the force of it.
They stay like that, tangled together, their bodies molding into each other as they come down from the high. But the tears don’t stop. They cling to each other, crying softly as the reality of their situation crashes down on them.
“I love you so much,” he says, feeling her fingers tracing patterns on his back.
“I love you, too,” she admits without hesitation. “Do you think that's enough?”
Lando lifts his head, his eyes red-rimmed but full of a tentative hope. “No. But it's a start.”
PREVIOUS LN⁴ ONE-SHOT
MASTERLIST
Thank you for reading!
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© trashy track tales, 2024
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omfg you put into words all of my internal angry mutterings i have when I see stuff like that
friendly reminder that putting 'x reader' as the label on your fic and then using a cover photo with a waif thin, petite, rapunzel ass, instagram aesthetic, white woman as the very first impression of what your fic is supposed to be about is a dick move
even if you don't add any descriptors of what the reader looks like in your fic (which, most of you slip up and do add them and don't care to edit them out) - having the audience's very first impression of your fic be that the love interest is a thin white woman says a lot about your unconscious thought process while writing the fic.
it says a lot about who you consider to be desirable in society and who you want your audience to be thinking about and picturing while reading the fic, when they should be thinking about and picturing themselves being desired by their favourite characters for polite escapism.
just a little tidbit for you
#‘you toss your hair up into a messy bun’ NO I DONT?#‘your face turned red’ but it doesn’t tho#it’s honestly makes me feel so disheartened i’m ngl 😭😭#like i read a summary of a fic and im like ‘shit yeah this shit looks GAS’#and then there’s a cover or a header or a mood board with someone who looks NOTHING like me#and i’m like ‘oh damn so it’s not really ‘x reader’ it’s ‘x this-random-white-woman’#even if readers appearance is never mentioned in the fic#sadly i find it SO HARD to read a fic after seeing the image of the reader ‘character’ the author had in their head while writing it#^when it’s not properly tagged#if i go in expecting ‘x reader’ im expecting that#not ‘x aesthetic-pinterest-girl’#like i now that no one will ever write ‘x pacific islander! reader’ and that’s ok#but PLEASE at least leave SOME blank slates so i can imagine 😭
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𝐝𝐮𝐦𝐛 & 𝐩𝐨𝐞𝐭𝐢𝐜
prequel to juno

18+ MINORS DNI
a/n: someone asked about this and honestly thank you so much for doing that, i love the idea and have been obsessing over it for weeks now. hope this does the first part justice (also i couldn’t figure out which filter i used on the first fic’s header and now this one pisses me off bc it looks different 😔)
also, i’m totally in love with this dynamic. i might keep writing oneshots about these two specifically because damn 😭 i can’t let them go
summary: college!au, fuckboy!nat and reader trying to get her to commit
warnings: smut, tipsy sex, implied dubcon (very brief, not between reader and nat), exhibitionism, unprotected sex, cheating but not really, vomiting (mentioned)—not sure if there’s anything else, but lmk if you find something so i can add it
word count: 18.5k (ik it’s long and i apologize for that but i promise it’s worth it if i may say so myself)
✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷
The basketball hits you in the back of your head.
It's not the most painful thing to ever happen to you, but the impact is enough to make you stumble. A dull ache shoots through your skull and you turn around, glaring at whoever the offender is.
Red hair, basketball jersey, hands lifted in silent apology before you can even say anything. Natasha's been walking behind you for about five minutes now and, unbeknownst to you, she's been staring a little too much. Staring hard.
Short white skirt, baby pink lacy top, high heels — it's enough to make her lose her train of thought. Paired with the sun framing your body, the sight is lethal.
It's also enough to make her forget about Clint. Once he'd realized she's staring, he knocked the ball out of her hands and sent it flying.
All she wanted to do was check out whoever's walking in front of her. Suddenly, she has to deal with an angry, no less gorgeous girl staring her down.
Her thoughts falter. Her witty self is gone. All that remains is a mushy brain and the urge to somehow turn things around.
"Say something", you demand, rubbing the sore spot on the back of your head.
"...His fault, not mine."
You tilt your head, briefly glancing at her jersey. Natasha Romanoff — you know her. Not intimately, just in passing. You exchanged names once, during Welcome Week. You’ve seen her in bars, been to some of her basketball games. Usually, she's tangled up with some other girl.
Natasha picks up the ball again. She holds it out to you, almost like a peace offering. Your lips twitch and you lower your hand from your head.
"You ever play?", she asks.
You snort. "I don't think my high heels are gym approved."
"High heels or not, I think you'd look pretty good on the court." She leans in, voice dropping to a murmur. "Or against the lockers. Pick your poison."
Next to her, Clint rolls his eyes. He's seen her do this way too many times before. Find a girl, flirt with her, take her home. Then, complain about a hangover and a phone that's getting blown up with messages and voicemails. All it leads to is another girl who got ghosted by Natasha Romanoff.
You raise your eyebrows, unimpressed. You're familiar enough with her reputation and, truthfully, you like to protect your peace. No need for more drama, right?
But the sweat glistens on her biceps — she must've finished basketball practice not too long ago. Loose strands of red hair curl in the moist heat. Green eyes twinkle. You look away, at the parking lot stretching out next to you. Painfully uninteresting, but you're trying to keep your thoughts from wandering into dangerous territory.
"You're going to the cafeteria?", you ask, finally glancing at her again. Pull yourself together.
"Mhm", she says, tossing the ball into the air and catching it with one hand. "You, too?"
"No." You tilt your head, smiling sweetly. You step back and lift your hand, waving. "Have fun!"
You turn and walk towards the main entrance, skirt swishing and heels clicking against the pavement.
All Natasha can do is stare, eyebrows raised. The basketball drops and rolls away, causing Clint to curse and chase after it, but she's still staring. Only when he returns and punches her arm does she turn around.
"What?"
"You’re not serious."
"Oh, come on. That was harmless."
"That?" He wheezes, tucking the ball under his arm. "With you, it's never harmless."
Natasha lets out a dismissive sound, but her eyes have tracked you again. She's used to girls falling into her lap, not them walking away without so much as glancing back at her.
Nothing about this is, or will be, harmless.
. . .
Natasha's not the type to spend her Fridays studying, but she has no choice. That is, if the prospect of studying includes running into someone who seems to be avoiding her.
The lighting inside the library is dim. Pages rustle, keyboards click, people murmur softly. It smells like old books and the coffee you brought along in your thermos.
On the table in front of you, you've got a real setup — laptop, books, some notes, a few pens. You're distracted, which is good. You don't notice the people entering the library, don't notice the students making a little too much noise. This way, you can study more efficiently.
You also don't notice when Natasha walks in, but she notices you. All it takes is one glance in your direction, and suddenly, she's on her way to your table.
She slides into the seat across from you and stretches out. Her legs bump into yours. When you look up, she grins faintly and crosses her arms behind her head.
"You lost?", you mumble, directing your attention toward the laptop in front of you again.
"I'm right where I want to be."
"Doubt that."
Natasha steals one of your pens and twirls it between her fingers. She stays quiet for a moment, watching you, taking you in. Oversized sweater, off-shoulder. Lacy bralette peeking out from underneath. Hair half-up, slightly messy, and a delicate necklace around your neck.
You look up and your eyes meet. You tilt your head.
"Looks like you're staying."
"Am I not allowed to?"
"As long as you left your basketball at home", you say, reaching for a marker, "it's fine."
"I told you that wasn't me", she points out, stealing the marker from you. She flicks off the cap and draws a crescent on one of your notes. You look up, eyebrows raised and lips pressed together to keep them from twitching. She shrugs. "Matches your necklace."
"I almost got a concussion", you say, grabbing the marker again. "And you were right behind me. So I'll assume it was you."
"That's odd", she says. "Girls usually don't get concussions when I'm behind them."
You scoff, tucking some hair behind your ear. Natasha hums and leans in, arms crossed on top of the table. Her eyes are a deeper green now, courtesy of the dimmer light inside the library, but they shimmer just as much.
You shake your head and shift in your chair, fingers tapping against the book in front of you. "You're here to study or piss me off?"
"A bit of both. Multitasking, you know." She tilts her chair slightly, balancing it on its back two legs, making herself comfortable.
You're still not sure what she wants from you, but you have your assumptions. You know who she is. Everyone does. Star athlete, newest captain of the university's basketball team, current record holder of hooking up with the most girls. At least that's what everyone says about her.
You're certain they have a point, though. You're witnessing it with your own eyes. Natasha Romanoff is a flirt, a fuckboy, and you're her latest victim.
"I'm here to study", you point out.
"I can see that."
"And you...?"
"Keeping you company."
"Who's saying I want company?"
Natasha shrugs. "You haven't made me leave yet."
You sigh, conceding, then lower your eyes again. You skim the vocabulary list of French in front of you. If you'd paid more attention last semester, you maybe wouldn't be struggling as much now.
Natasha leans in, glancing at the vocabulary as well. Se doucher, s'habiller, être d'accord — she glances at you, at the slightly bored look on your face, and taps your arm with a pen. You look at her.
"Ton français est déjà pas mal", she whispers, "mais j'aimerais bien entendre comment tu gémis dans cette langue."
You feel the heat rise to your cheeks before you can stop it.
There's no way she just asked you to moan in French.
"You're way too fucking bold for your own good."
"Yeah?" She hums, getting up from her chair. She walks around the table and you turn your head to keep her eyes on her, but suddenly, her mouth is right next to your ear. "I've found that it works."
You look up, slowly, until your eyes are boring into hers. Her mouth is inches away from yours, heat radiating from her plush lips. Then, your eyes dart lower. You stare at them.
She notices. Of course she does.
A smirk forms on her face. Small, barely noticeable, but irresistible. It convinces you that maybe two can play this game.
"Alors", you mumble, "fais-moi gémir."
Natasha pauses, surprise crossing her features. But then you're packing up — stacking books and papers, putting your laptop into your backpack — and she almost puts her hand on your arm.
"You were being serious?"
"Hm?" You look up, head tilted and glossy lips shimmering. You shake your head. "Oh, no. I'm going home."
"This is the second time you're doing this."
You sling the backpack over your shoulder and glance at her. "Pretty sure it's not the last time, either."
She shifts on her feet, jaw clenched and hands tucked into the pockets of her sweatpants. Before you can leave, she quickly steps in front of you.
"There's this party", she says. "Next week. Pietro's place. Perfect spot for you to reject me a third time."
"Pietro?", you ask, raising your eyebrows.
"One of the Maximoff twins."
"Right." You nod. "Sounds lame."
"It won't be", she insists. "Just...come by. Have a beer. Maybe you know a few French party tricks?"
You exhale, trying to stop yourself from smiling. It's a lost cause, though, and the way your face seems to soften gives Natasha whiplash.
"We'll see", you say, brushing past her. "Guess you'll just have to keep an eye out for me."
"Okay", she mumbles.
You pause, arms wrapped around the books you're holding to your chest. You look at her one last time, then you step out of the library.
. . .
A steep staircase and dim lighting don't pair well.
One hand sliding along the railing attached to the wall to keep yourself from falling, you're slowly making your way down the stairs and into the basement. As soon as you've stepped inside, the stench hits you.
Air thick with smoke, smelling like vodka and sweat. Weed and cheap perfumes, pizza and something not unlike the sourness of vomit. You scrunch up your nose and glance at your friends.
Everything is exactly how you expected it would be. Neon LED strips, worn couches, a dying potted plant in the corner. The bass from the speakers is rattling the walls. Someone's rolling a joint on the coffee table.
In your tiny corset top and silk skirt, you definitely feel a little out of place. Then, you spot her.
Grey hoodie with the sleeves rolled up, basketball shorts, a bottle of beer in her hand. She laughs at something Clint says, then tips back her head to take a sip. As she's moving her lips from the bottle's mouth, she quirks her eyes in your direction.
What comes next seems to be the longest hour of your life.
60 minutes of tiptoeing around each other, of glancing across the room, of trying to distract yourself. You're tense, you both are, you're tipsy, and every time you try to focus on something else it fails horribly — which is exactly why a game of 'spin the bottle' is both a blessing and a curse. Looking at the expression on Carol's face, though, you feel like Natasha may have meddled in this.
You gather on the couches. You sit on the armrest, one leg crossed over the other, and watch Natasha as she sits down on the floor right across from you.
The bottle spins a few times, but you barely pay any attention. That is, until it's your turn.
You spin the bottle. You watch it almost land on Natasha, but then it stops too soon. Before you know it, you're kissing one of Clint's friends.
You're tipsy enough to not care too much, but Natasha's lips form a thin line. She lifts her bottle to her mouth and takes a swig.
The game continues. More kisses, some resembling pecks and others turning into full make out-sessions.
Suddenly, it's your turn again. You spin the bottle, watch it closely — and it lands on Natasha.
First, there's a beat of silence. Someone whistles. Heart racing, you clear your throat and put aside your drink. You get up, approach her, and end up in her lap. Her hands come up to rest on your waist.
"Not rejecting me this time?", she murmurs, looking at your mouth. Your lipgloss has been tempting her all night.
"Third time's a charm", you reply, running your hands along her jaw and up into her hair. Silky red locks, smooth between your fingers.
Natasha exhales quietly. She leans in, closing the distance and pressing her lips to yours.
It's controlled at first. Nothing but a firm press of lips. Beer and weed, lipgloss and strawberries.
Bass that's making the floor thrum. Warm hands and plush lips. You feel her heat against you. Natasha, dazed and undone, pulls you closer until your body is flush with hers.
Her hands sneak higher, fingertips grazing the hem of your top. Your fingers curl into the fabric of her hoodie. Your lips part, and so do hers, and her grip on your sides tightens.
Your thighs are snug around her middle. Her hands move lower, to the part beneath your ass, and grasp at the soft flesh there.
Suddenly, it's desperate. You're tipsy enough to be bold, so you deepen the kiss further and further. Natasha goes along with it, because why shouldn't she? — This is what's she's been wanting for weeks at this point.
At some point, you're forced to remember you aren't alone. You pull away, breathless and flushed, need growing inside your buzzing body. Natasha stares back at you, breathing heavily, her shorts uncomfortably tight. You see a muscle in her jaw tick.
Swollen lips tingle, kiss bitten and slick with her taste. Her fingers twitch against your sides, the suppressed urge to get up and drag you away apparent.
There's no need to say it out loud. You both know you're getting out of there, and you're doing it together.
You get off her lap and sit back down in your spot. She keeps looking at you, her knees tucked against her chest to hide the issue the kiss left her with.
You last five minutes. You shift, glance at her, let your eyes sweep over your friends. Having decided you're done waiting, you get up and disappear in the hallway. Natasha's eyes track you down, then she scrambles off the floor and shoves her beer into Clint's hands.
"Don't wait up", she says, already chasing after your retreating figure.
You glance over your shoulder as you're going up the stairs. Sure enough, Natasha's following close behind.
You start pushing open doors. Bathroom? Occupied. Living room? No way. Anyone could walk in on you.
One of the bedrooms is empty. Judging by the looks of it, it belongs to Pietro. Messy desk, unmade bed, empty bottles on the nightstand. At this point, though, you really don't care.
You hear the door close and turn around. A few seconds later, you're tangled up with her. Hands roam your body impatiently, lips move in sync with yours. You try to walk her backwards, maybe push her against the wall, but she hoists you up by your thighs and carries you to the bed.
You're too tipsy to consider whether this can end well, but you're also horny enough that you wouldn't worry even if you were sober.
Natasha is almost sober — two bottles of beer don't have much of an impact on her at this point —, but she doesn't care, either. You've been on her mind for weeks. You've been that dirty little fantasy she jerked off to, that one girl that somehow managed to catch her attention in a room full of others. This is something she needs.
She spins around and sits down with you in her lap. You pull away for a second, only to tug at her hoodie. She peels it off, revealing a fitted tank underneath. Muscles taut, chest rising and falling rapidly. Her hands reach for your corset top, fumbling with the stubborn fabric.
"Fucking- how do you get this off?"
"Try being less rough", you mumble, smiling, and use your finger to tip her chin up. You kiss her. Her tongue sweeps past your lips.
The corset top comes off, and Natasha moves you onto your back. She tugs down her shorts just enough to get what she wants.
All it takes is one look at her, and you instantly realize this will hurt. You knew she's big — you felt it sitting on her lap. But looking at her now, hard as a rock and flushed and pulsing, your tipsy brain starts to grasp that making her fit will be a challenge.
"You'll be fine", she promises, having noticed you staring. She rolls on a condom and crawls on top of you. Her lips meet yours and she guides herself into place.
You moan into her mouth. Her hips roll against yours, easing it into you inch by inch. It stretches you out. You're soaked, but getting her fully inside you still proves to be difficult.
She keeps her eyes glued to your face, watching every little reaction as she buries herself in your swollen cunt. Your thighs wrap around her waist, trembling, and she bottoms out.
"Doing so good", she pants. She pulls away to bury her face against your neck. She starts moving her hips, fucking her throbbing cock into you. You mewl and whine, manicured nails raking down her muscular back. "Wanted this for so long."
"Yeah?" You moan, nails digging into her skin. Your hips rock against hers. The bed shakes underneath you.
Gripping your waist tightly, she pulls out and thrusts back into you. It's enough to knock the air out of your lungs.
"Yeah", she grunts, placing open-mouthed kisses along your neck. "Wanted you so bad."
Your eyes flutter shut. You lift your hips, meeting each of her thrusts. The orgasm builds up, and you come around her cock.
In the morning, you're up first. Sunlight is filtering through the curtains, the air smells like sex and sweat.
You roll over and see Natasha, still asleep and one arm behind her head. The other is tucked under your body. Once the fog in your head has cleared up, you realize you've just added yourself to her list of disposable one night stands.
'Not that serious.' That's the words she says whenever she's questioned about her hookup habits. Now you're part of that, as well.
You sit up slightly and pause. When she stays asleep, you slip out from underneath the covers and pad through the room. You grab your skirt, your underwear, and put your clothes on.
"Y/N?", she mutters, rubbing her eyes. You look at her as you stand there, slipping your high heel on. "You leaving?"
"It's not that serious, right?", you say.
You grab your purse and Natasha leans on her elbow, studying you. In the early morning light, with your hair messy and your lipstick smudged, you look even more tempting. If she was different, she'd beg you to stay. She'd try to make more mornings like this one happen. Maybe she'd even see if there could be more than sex to this.
But that's not who she is, or at least that's what she tells herself. Still, she clears her throat and shrugs, almost awkwardly.
"Not staying for breakfast?"
"Not today", you say, hand on the doorknob. "See you around?"
"Sure", she mumbles. The door falls shut behind you. Any chance at getting you back into bed with her is gone — for now, at least.
Natasha exhales slowly and sinks into the mattress again. She stares at the ceiling, jaw clenched and one hand fisting the bedsheets. She doesn't know why she's so frustrated. You said it yourself: 'not that serious'. Nothing is ever serious with Natasha.
After a few minutes of silent sulking, she decides it's the lack of sleep that's got her acting like this.
. . .
Natasha doesn't chase.
She tells herself that multiple times — usually when you make fun of her for getting clingy, or soft. When she asks for your number, when she starts texting you late at night. When the hookups become more frequent.
It's still just sex, but something more begins to build. Friendship, affection. Something that feels like love but can't be — or that's what you both tell yourselves.
When you get a text one evening, you expect it to be another booty call. You've been hooking up for a while now, and not a day goes by where you don't see each other.
It's not an invitation to come have sex, though. You look at your phone and raise your eyebrows.
Natasha: please tell me you
know how to take
care of a kitten — 8.37 pm
Natasha: Y/N im
begging you — 8.38 pm
*image attached*
You: what the fuck — 8.40 pm
Natasha: COME OVER — 8.40 pm
The sight you get when walking into her dorm is ridiculous in the best way possible. Natasha — all muscles and basketball shorts — and a little kitten clawing at her hoodie.
It turns out that Natasha, leaving the court after practice, heard something meow pathetically. At first, she wanted to leave — it was pouring rain, and she was tired, and truthfully, she can't take in every stray she runs into.
Then, she saw the kitten. Tiny, partially hidden in a bush, its fur soaked. It meowed again.
She tried to walk away. A few minutes later, she was stuffing the tiny thing into the kangaroo pocket of her hoodie.
"Aw, so cute", you coo, sitting down next to her. "I guess the kitten's cute, too."
She shoots you a glare, but the effect is destroyed by the little feline trying to catch one of her drawstrings. "You could try helping."
"No fun in that." You reach for Natasha's hands and start adjusting them. That little bit of contact is enough to send heat into her cheeks. "It's still wet. You need to dry it."
"I tried! It bit me."
"Yes, yes", you mumble, grabbing a random towel and silently praying it isn't full of sweat or other gnarly bodily fluids. "It fits in your palm, but it's so scary."
"It has knives for hands."
You dry the kitten off together. Once that's done, you show her how to hold it. But then, it knocks.
"Randy here", someone calls. Your resident advisor.
"Wait, let me-"
"No!" Natasha, panicking, grabs the kitten. All you can do is stare, stunned, as she yanks down her hoodie to stuff it inside. The poor creature lets out a pitiful mew, and your eyes widen in horror.
"Natasha!", you hiss.
"Shut up!" She grips the front of her hoodie when the kitten meows again, as if she can physically will it into silence.
You give her a bewildered look. Then, you remember.
Randy hates cats for multiple reasons. Mild allergies, bad encounters when he was a kid, general lack of fondness toward other living beings. Pets aren't allowed in the dorms, either way — but he'll even shoo the strays away. He's awkward, but he's not a pushover. If he finds out about this, he'll rat you out.
Another knock. More impatient this time.
"Uh, guys? It's Randy! Open up?"
"A minute", you call back, smoothing down your hair. Natasha is wrestling with the kitten inside her hoodie. She winces when it buries its claws in her chest.
Cheeks flushed and expression somewhat schooled, you make it to the door and open it. Randy stares at you. Clearly, he expected someone else.
"You", he says.
"Me."
"This is Romanoff's dorm, though."
You step aside just enough for him to catch a glimpse of her. You glance over your shoulder as well. When you see her flushed face and the wiggling hoodie prison, you quickly block his view again.
"What do you need?"
Behind you, you hear a muffled mew.
"Just wanted to pop by", he says, looking over your shoulder again. You cross your arms and lean against the doorframe, chin lifted in silent defiance.
"We're studying", you lie. "So please leave?"
Another mew. Natasha is fidgeting, trying to keep the kitten and her hoodie in place. She could swear she's never sweated this much in her entire life. Her fingers shake as she gently adjusts the kitten.
This is the first time everything between you begins to feel different. You're not sure what it is — the absurdity of hiding a kitten? The panicked looks she keeps shooting at you? Her softer side, so unlike what she's shown you so far? —, but you feel yourself slipping into a dangerous situation.
Falling in love with Natasha can't end well.
Randy frowns and shifts, his head tilting. You scoot to the side, silently cursing his nosiness.
"I got a test tomorrow, Randy."
"Yes, just-"
"No", you say firmly, heart thundering with a mix of anxiety and thrill. He sighs. "Whatever it is, just come by tomorrow. I'm sure we'll run into each other again."
He gives you one last skeptical look, then steps back. You shut the door and turn around only to see Natasha barely holding back laughter. She's still shaking, the kitten finally pushing its head through the neckline of her hoodie. A tiny paw presses against her collarbone and your stomach flips.
Not the cocky athlete. Not the shameless flirt. Just a girl in her dorm, a girl you're starting to like more and more, freaking out over a kitten.
You cross the room before you know it. Hands cupping her face, heart rabbiting with exhilaration, you lean in and kiss her deeply.
It's the first crack that appears in your just friends-facade.
. . .
Most people expect the casual stuff to be less complicated than actual relationships.
In many cases, that's true. In others, it absolutely isn't.
The emotional intimacy is there, but there's no commitment. Neither of you has the right to get jealous, but it happens anyway. There are expectations, but there are no labels. Either of you could walk out at any given moment.
It's thrilling. It's terrifying. It makes every hookup, every kiss, feel like something worth chasing.
Then, you fight. Usually, it's nothing serious, but it sucks anyway. It creates this odd push-and-pull, this combination of cursing each other out only to end up in bed together. It leads to jealousy plays and spikes of irritation, sleepless nights and desperate text messages resulting from being lonely and horny.
This time, it started when Natasha flirted with someone at a bar. You were there with a couple of friends, and when you turned around to order another cocktail, a girl had approached her. Suddenly, you caught her flirting shamelessly.
It wasn't what made you fly off the handle, though. The nudes in her phone, hours after you'd had sex in her dorm, were.
Not that serious, she said. We're just hooking up. Casual, you know. I wasn't even interested in her.
You kept yelling, anyway. She glared at you, but it wasn't too intimidating. You know she's scared of you, for some reason, so you kept bawling her out. The night ended with you blocking her.
Almost a week later, you're still ignoring her. You're pissed, and it'll stay like that until she apologizes, so you keep her number blocked and your bed empty.
Wanda is the one who drags you to a sorority party. Mainly because she likes one of the girls there, but also because she thinks you need to get out of your dorm and find a rebound. Plus, the theme is 'movie characters', and she can't miss that.
The word rebound makes you frown, though.
"It wouldn't be a rebound", you tell her. "We never dated. No wounds I need to distract myself from."
"Y/N, honey, that girl always leaves a wound."
Maybe she has a point. Trusting her judgment, you end up going to that party. You step into the room, and the first person who looks at you is none other than Natasha.
She sees your costume and forgets how to function. A green, short dress, shimmering wings on your back, makeup flawless. Ballet flats with pompons on the toes.
Tinkerbell. Short and sweet — very on point.
Her thoughts are a mess. No way. She did this on purpose. To ruin my night. What if I ruin her, instead?
Fuck, I need to sit down.
Her hand tightens around the beer bottle. Her jaw clenches as she grinds her molars.
But you? You're barely paying attention to her. You're smiling already, talking to Wanda about everything and anything — some concert, the kitten she took in — while Natasha is losing her mind. You're sipping drinks, chatting with people, laughing.
You step closer to some guy in a Joker-costume. He leans in, mumbling, and you giggle. He reaches out to tuck some hair behind your ear.
It's barely something, but Natasha feels like she's witnessing a war crime.
She downs one more shot, her brain fuzzy, and then gets up. You feel her hand on your back, pushing you away from the guy. You're too surprised to react properly.
"She's not interested", she snaps when he tries to stop her.
"Since when do you speak for me?"
"Shut up", she mutters, wrapping her arm around your waist.
You stare at her, frowning. Is she drunk?
Maybe. Not necessarily. She could be completely sober and still act like an idiot.
"I was hoping I wouldn't have to talk to you tonight, you know."
"Sure", she grunts. "That's why you're dressed like this. To piss me off."
You stop and tear yourself away from her embrace. She pauses, blinking.
"Not everything I do is for you!", you snap. "And I'm tired of you acting like it is!"
"Then why are you dressed like that?", she barks.
You glare at her, your back against the wall. She's walked you into some hallway — secluded, dark, but close enough to the party so you can still hear the music. The ground is vibrating, shaking beneath Natasha's feet, and her head spins with a mixture of anger and want.
Your costume isn't helping. The short dress, the sparkling material, the smooth skin of your thighs. Now she's not only drunk and pissed, but can also feel herself harden and twitch in her camo pants.
"Are you kidding? I'm dressed like this because I look good!"
"Obviously", she retorts, stepping forward. The dog tag around her neck dangles in front of you, her alcohol-warm breath fanning your mouth. "You always do."
Her hand comes up to press against the wall beside your head. You look up at her, expression forcibly blank. She leans in closer, breathing heavily. Her lips almost touch yours, but you push your hand against her chest.
"You're drunk", you say.
"I'd want you even if I was sober."
"You don't get to say that", you hiss. "Not after what you did."
"And what did you do?", she says, fingers curling and fist pressing harder against the wall. "I saw you, you know. With that clown over there. What do you even want from him?"
You stare at her, both of you out of breath. Something about this situation is turning you on — how close she is, how she smells like that one cologne you love on her. How you're alone, bodies inches apart. How her hips twitch, and her eyes both search and avoid yours. How, despite it all, she's actually jealous.
"It's just casual, right?", you murmur.
Natasha furrows her eyebrows. Her lips curl into a faint smirk. "That's something you worry about?"
"No."
"Liar."
You shove her. She stumbles closer anyway, grabbing your face and kissing you.
Teeth clash, bodies intertwine against the wall. Your hands grasp at the material of her tank top. Your back hits the wall, again and again, and her hands move to fumble with your dress. She bunches it up around your hips, her fingers quickly finding the front of your lace panties. She groans when she feels how wet you are.
"Who'd you wear these for?", she pants against your neck.
Your hips buckle into her touch, chasing friction. She rubs against you through the thin fabric. You moan and Natasha sees stars.
"Fuck- fuck, Nat-"
"Stop talking", she gasps, pulling you into another kiss. Her fingers nudge past the fabric and slide against slick heat. She works you open, filling the hallway with quiet squelching sounds.
Her fingers fuck into you. You moan, back arching, and reach between you to fumble with the zipper of her pants. You yank the fabric down enough to let her cock spring free. Pink-tipped and veins throbbing, oozing precum.
Natasha's breathing stutters when she feels your hand around her cock. You stroke her, slowly at first, and her head drops against your shoulder. Her fingers are still inside of you, but the movements become more irregular.
"Shit", she whines, burying her face against your neck. You smear precum down her length, lubricating it. Her fingers curl inside you and you almost let go.
She pulls away and tears her pants down. Not willing to waste any time, she squeezes your thighs together and pushes her cock between them. She fucks herself with your plush thighs, the shaft just barely grazing your clit, precum making your skin slick.
Beads of sweat roll down her temple. You stare at her, equally lightheaded and mesmerized.
Finally, she hikes up your thigh and aligns herself with you. She thrusts in, deep, and both of you moan.
Wet, hot, tight. Natasha's losing her mind.
"Tinkerbell, huh?", she pants, snapping her hips forward.
"Yeah", you moan, meeting each of her thrusts. She laughs roughly, pressing her lips to your neck. "Bet you've never fucked a fairy before."
"Can't say I've had the pleasure." She grunts against your neck, then lifts her mouth to your ear. The coil in your stomach tightens. "Wanna cum inside you."
Not thinking straight, you nod frantically. You grab the chain around her neck, keeping her close. Her cock throbs hotly inside you, and your clit is so swollen that it hurts each time her skin rubs against it.
She couldn't stop if she wanted to. She's so deep, so close, chasing it, and your soft moans and whines aren't making it any easier for her, either. Hot spurts of cum shoot into you, your own orgasm milking out every drop as your walls tighten around her.
Natasha sags against you, spent. Her cock twitches inside of you, a white and sticky fluid dripping down your thighs, and you exhale shakily. The noises from the party — muffled music, voices, the bass — takes you back to reality. Back to the dark hallway, the fight, the fact you just had sex without even considering you could be walked in on.
You're sticky, overstimulated. Dizziness is setting in. The music thumps, but it's nothing compared to your pounding heart. Natasha breathes against your neck, her arms still keeping you trapped against the wall, and you finally push her away.
"You still need to apologize."
"I just made you come", she says.
"You really think that's a smart answer right now?"
"No, but-", she says, but you shove her off and the words die on her tongue. She frowns, opening her mouth again, but then it shuts when she sees her cum drip down your thighs. She stares, her half-erect cock twitching once more.
"Don't even think about it", you say, glaring and straighten your dress. "Apologize, or I'm leaving."
"There's nothing to apologize for", she says after a few seconds of silence. She pulls up her boxers and cargo pants and zips up again. "We're not official."
Just like that, you regret everything that happened in the past ten minutes. You regret ever getting to know the feeling of her finishing inside you, of ever thinking things could change. You regret thinking you could be the odd one out, the one who makes her change.
You don't say anything. You step back, using your hands to remove most of the cum sticking to your thighs, and walk away.
Natasha's heart races as she watches your figure disappear. She doesn't chase. And yet, she runs after you.
She catches your wrist just as you're about to leave the house. She spins you around and pulls you into her arms, kissing you.
You want to shove her away. You want to let this go. You should let it go.
An hour later, you unblock her number.
. . .
Popcorn, soda and a horror movie at a flashback cinema.
It was Natasha's idea. She was the one who came up with it, thinking it'd be nice to see you squirm. Maybe you'd clutch her arm, hide your face against her shoulder, make her feel needed. Though, she obviously couldn't tell you that.
You couldn't say no, even if a part of your brain kept telling you to. Two hours, spent in a dark room, hearts racing and bodies too close to ignore the heat burning between you.
You were right. It is dark, and intimate, and you notice her stretch and put her arm around your shoulders. You roll your eyes. Way too cliche.
Her breath fans your ear. Her thumb slips under the shoulder strap of your top. She teases the skin there, listening closely to see if you'll react in any way.
You don't. But then, her free hand pushes up the hem of your top to touch your stomach. Fingers travel higher, graze the lacy bra, and then dip underneath the fabric.
In front of you, you watch Krueger kill Glen. A Nightmare on Elm Street — a classic, one that'd probably leave you with at least a week worth of sleepless nights, but you're barely able to focus.
Natasha cups your breast. Her thumb rolls over the nipple, flicking it, tugging at it, until it's pebbled against her touch.
Then, you feel her mouth on your neck. Her tongue darts out and licks a stripe over your throat.
Your thighs press together in a hopeless attempt at keeping the wetness at bay, but it's no use. You shift in your seat, hoping no one will notice.
On-screen, it's a bloodbath. Between your legs, it's like a dam broke.
"Scared yet?", she mumbles, twisting and rolling the bud until it's raw and almost painfully sensitive.
"Watch the damn movie", you hiss through gritted teeth.
"I've watched it twice", she says dismissively.
You'd ask why she picked it. You don't have to, though. It's obvious — she did it so she could feel you up under the cover of darkness.
You don't fully understand why. You could do this in either of your dorms. You'd have more privacy, more time. You wouldn't risk being caught and getting banned from this cinema.
It's a nice cinema, though. The speakers are loud enough to cover up the moans that escape you.
Your hands grasp the armrests, nails digging into soft fabric. Natasha keeps trailing kisses all over your neck, wet and open-mouthed, and your hips shift desperately.
Fingers curl. You're trying to keep yourself from grabbing her stupid hand and pushing it between your legs yourself.
In the end, you don't have to do that. Her hand comes up from underneath your shirt again. You feel it inside your panties.
Your thighs spread just a little bit. Just enough to allow her fingers to gather wetness before thrusting into you. Your hips nearly jerk off the seat.
She thumbs your clit. Her fingers piston into you, setting a fast, relentless pace.
"Got plans for spring break?", she mumbles, like she isn't fucking you stupid inside a movie theater right now. Like her fingers aren't drenched with your slick. Like she isn't about to rip through her own sweatpants.
You almost laugh, but then her fingers curl just right. You whine, hand jerking and knocking over your popcorn. Natasha gives a breathless chuckle against your neck.
"Taking that as a 'no'", she muses, voice a whisper, and pulls out only to thrust back in. Your hips buckle. "How's Miami sound, baby?"
"Fuck."
"You a fan?", she mumbles. "All our friends are going. Tony said he'd get us a surprise."
Your vision blurs. Your lower belly tightens, heat shooting into it. The pleasure builds up, relentless and overwhelming, and your hips wiggle in the seat.
People are being murdered brutally on-screen. Blood, screams, booming speakers.
The real horror? She pulls out.
The emptiness hits you suddenly. You gasp quietly, feeling the pleasure shift into an aching, throbbing sensation. For a moment, you consider shoving your hand between your legs just to get it over with.
"I'll fucking kill you", you hiss, grabbing her slick hand. "Finish that."
"I'm not a fan of exhibitionism."
"Want to end up like that guy on the screen?"
She snorts quietly and sinks back into her seat, not making a move to help you out.
You shift, again and again, the movement giving you some much needed friction. But it's not nearly enough, and before you know it, your hand is pushing past your underwear.
Natasha watches, wide-eyed, as your hand starts to move. Something about it makes blood shoot into her lower half.
"Jesus Christ", she practically moans, her hand flying down to press against the bulge in her sweatpants.
She watches you squirm in your seat, soaking your own fingers because she left you desperate. Your hips roll up into your hand, chasing that high, and when it finally comes, the noises that escape you are enough to make thick ropes of milky cum shoot into Natasha's boxers.
She wasn't even touched properly. Watching you was enough.
The aftermath is a mess. Both of you wrecked, panting, her boxers drenched and your thighs sticky.
You feel her warm breath against your ear.
"So, Miami?"
. . .
The entire campus — no, the entire city — knows Tony Stark is extra.
Still, you don't expect him to pull up with an entire bus the day you're going to Miami for spring break.
"It's like The Magic School Bus", you say.
Natasha's got her arm around your shoulders. You're both leaning against the wall in front of your dorms, the early morning sun blinding you. You lift your hand to protect your eyes.
The people around you, groggy from waking up at 6am, are rubbing their faces. Oversized hoodies and disposable coffee cups galore, none of you too sure whether this is worth it. It feels more like a school trip than spring break.
"Would love to see him in a Mrs. Frizzle getup", she mumbles.
Clint, standing in front of you, snickers. He's got his arms around his girlfriend. You eye his outfit, which consists of a Hawaii shirt and khaki shorts, and are silently glad Natasha decided to go with something less obnoxious.
Steve grunts as he closes the luggage compartment. A total of 15 people are going to Miami, and he had to haul every suitcase and duffel bag into the bus.
"Done? Took you long enough", Tony says, arms crossed. He nods at the bus. "Come on."
"20 hours", Natasha mutters, walking into the bus with you. You find two seats in the middle and sit down. "I'm going to lose it."
"They're taking turns driving. You can literally sleep the whole way there. You'll be fine."
She grunts and plops into the space next to the window. You sit down and she pulls you closer, hand slipping under your top and resting on your stomach. Smooth, warm skin, her fingers drawing circles.
Your friends are staring. You know they are. It's not everyday that they see Natasha cozying up with someone like this.
A 20-hour bus ride is long enough already, but time really starts to drag when you're spending it next to the person you can never quite figure out.
Hour 1. You talk, quietly, and share earbuds.
Hour 2. Tony apparently managed to find one of the few buses nearby that have a/c. You shiver, Natasha notices, and suddenly, you're wearing her hoodie. You breathe in her scent.
Hour 4. Bored and tired, you both stretch out your legs and accidentally nudge each other. She doesn't pull back, it turns into a mindless little game of footsies, and your feet tangle.
Hour 5. You fall asleep. You didn't mean for that to happen — but she's warm against you, and her hoodie's soft, and a sip of the vodka she brought along knocked you right out.
Hour 7. You wake up, slowly, to find out the seat next to yours is empty.
"Where's Nat?", you ask sleepily.
"Taking a leak", Clint calls from the driver's seat. Wanda turns toward you, a knowing look on her face. You roll your eyes.
A minute later, she's back. She slides into the seat next to you, arm immediately resting over the backrests of the seats, and hands you a little flower. You twirl it between your fingers, studying it, and Natasha gets that dreaded warm feeling in her stomach again.
"Hope this didn't hurt your credit score."
"Be grateful."
"I am."
Her lips press against your cheek before she can stop herself. Everyone stares, and Natasha mutters something about you 'just having fun.' Her words sting.
Hour 9. Golden hour. The playlist is slower, the bus quieter. Her fingers tap an absentminded rhythm against your thigh.
Hour 14. Sleep-deprived and travel-weary, the idiocy is hitting you at full force.
Natasha pulls you into her lap, hands roaming your middle. You curl into her, grinning stupidly. She smiles against your neck and drags her lips higher up, kissing your earlobe. Her tongue darts out, just barely touching the shell of your ear. You laugh, and the others stir in their sleep.
You both freeze for a moment. When everyone stays quiet, she shifts you in her lap until her mouth can press against yours.
Hour 19. You're two hours away from your destination. You're way too honest and tired to keep the walls up. Hands intertwine, breaths mingle. You're sprawled out on the seats, squished together, but you don't mind.
"You ever think about leaving?"
"Leaving?", you murmur.
"Yeah. Just leaving. No plans, no destination. No...bullshit."
You're not sure why she's asking you, of all people.
Hour 21. You finally arrive at the hotel. You each have separate rooms, but it's 5am, and you're exhausted and needy, and Natasha ends up in your bed. Head on her chest, you fall asleep.
. . .
Just friends, you've told the others. Just having fun, you know.
Friends — but you're not kidding anyone.
You spent the first day in Miami sleeping. In your hotel room, on the balcony, and now, on the beach. You're on a lounger, a beach umbrella protecting you from the UV rays. Her face is planted between your boobs, her hand resting on your ass with her fingers under the fabric of your bikini.
You're not alone. Your friends are everywhere around you, either napping or suntanning, drinking cocktails or swimming. You're not sure whether this is what spring break is supposed to be like, but it's nice. Peaceful, slow, quiet.
Natasha grunts in her sleep, nodding her head to push her face further into the plush heat of your body. Your arms wrap around her head.
So much to do, so many things to see — yet it still feels like she'd rather be wrapped around you than anything else.
You see Tony return with a bag of food. Your hand trails down her spine, an attempt to gently coax her into wakefulness.
"What?", she mutters, fingers curling.
"Stark brought cheeseburgers."
"Don't care. Let me sleep."
"I'm hungry."
Natasha looks up, eyes bleary. You smile faintly when you notice the light sunburn on her cheeks.
"I want food", you add.
She stares at you, eyebrows furrowed. Then she sighs and sits up, raking one hand through her hair. It's curled at the ends from the saltwater, with little grains of sand in it. She gets up like going to grab you some food is the most obvious thing to do.
You lean back, watching her. You're so lost in thoughts that you almost don't notice Daisy poking your side. Your head turns.
"What?"
"Her? Really?"
You shift, looking away again. "What about her?"
She shrugs, but silently, she immediately comes up with an entire list of reasons. At the top — the fact that Natasha's slept with basically every girl on campus and hasn't had a relationship last longer than a week so far. It's happened to her as well, but there's no way she'll tell you that.
"Nothing", she says evasively. "She's just got this whole...dumb and poetic-thing going on. Like, she has no clue what the fuck she's saying, but it sounds good anyway."
Natasha, crouched down in front of the greasy paper bag, grabs two burgers. Your head lolls to the side and you almost sigh when she looks up and puts her jawline on full display. It's too easy to want her, even if you maybe shouldn't.
"She's not dumb", you say, glancing at Daisy again. You hesitate. "But she's not poetic either. I mean, that sex joke she made yesterday?"
"You laughed, though."
"Huh?"
"You laughed", she repeats. You give her a deadpan look. "Seriously. You laugh at all her jokes."
You scoff, shaking your head. Internally, though, you're wondering whether she's right.
You watch Natasha return, two burgers and a soda in her hands. You scoot forward and she plops down behind you, letting you sit between her legs. Daisy doesn't say anything, but the look on her face is telling enough.
. . .
Logs and branches in various stages of burning, smoke curling into the air, sparks drifting upward. Embers glow, stars sparkle mirthfully, tequila burns your throat.
You're sitting on blankets, feet buried in the sand, and watch the bonfire. Natasha's next to you, roasting marshmallows and sipping tequila. You nudge her when she puts the bottle a little too close to the fire.
"Careful there."
"I am", she mumbles, looking at you. Her eyes roam all over your face, drinking in every feature. She has no idea how mesmerized she looks. She has no idea how helpless she looks. She's tipsy, and she's warm, and she's in love. The thought would scare her, but her brain isn't capable of much more than staring at you and keeping her awake.
If she had to choose between the two, she'd pick the former.
People are dancing, swaying around the bonfire. Music is playing on portable speakers. Her hand finds yours. Suddenly, you're stumbling through the sand.
"Hey, my marshmallow!"
"Screw that", she says, turning to pull you in close. There's that stupid little smile on her face, the one that makes you gravitate towards her. She leans in, hot breath fanning your lips. You tilt your head.
Hands smooth down your sides, the fabric of your bodycon dress silky under her palms. She leans in, nose almost touching yours.
"Bet you wanna", she mumbles, drunk and testing her limits. You roll your eyes, but don't pull away. "Don't give me that look."
"What look?"
"Like this is funny."
"It is funny", you say. Her hands grip your waist, pulling you even closer. "You're ridiculous."
She scoffs, hands sliding down your sides. Hooking her thumbs under the hem of your dress, she starts bunching it up around your thighs. You swat at her hand.
"Not here", you say, glancing at your friends. Another knowing look from Wanda. You flip her off.
Natasha doesn't respond. Her head dips into the crook of your neck, peppering the perfumed skin with kisses. Wet, warm, worshipping. She's smitten and drunk and hard, and the ocean is right nearby, and if she tries enough...
"No."
She groans, her fingertips digging into your thighs. She presses against you, already straining against the fabric of her shorts.
"They're not even watching."
"They are", you insist. "You're the one who keeps telling them we're friends, anyway. So let's not go overboard."
Another noise of disapproval. She's drunk, and you're soft and warm, and she'd probably fuck you right here in the sand if given the opportunity.
Also, enough guys have been staring at you all night. She wants to give them something to stare.
You pull back and cup her face. You look right into her eyes. Her heart skips a beat. She's a goner.
Now everyone is staring. This time, neither of you notices.
(Because even drunk, she knows it's you.)
. . .
It's rare that you and Natasha part during that week in Miami, but it does happen.
She's at the bar, you're in your hotel room. She's ordering drinks, you're making sure your hair looks nice. She's chatting up some girl, you're twisting and turning in front of the mirror to see every angle of your body.
Natasha doesn't even know how it started. All she remembers is waking up alone, the memories of last night fresh in her mind.
A beach concert. You, in front of her, complaining about not being able to see. In hindsight, she knows you must've been exaggerating; in that moment, however, she didn't care. She grabbed you and hoisted you onto her shoulders.
People stared. Her shoulders felt like the top of the world. When you slid down, she didn't let go.
A few hours later, at 4 in the morning. You, tipsy, in her lap. Strong arms wrapped around your middle. A heart that beat a little too fast.
It's overcompensation. She's desperate to prove to herself that what she has with you still isn't anything serious, but she knows that's ridiculous. Looking at the girl in front of her — tiny bikini, full lips, messy eyebrows — she feels nothing. Just months ago, she would've done everything in her power to get her to sleep with her.
Now? Static. Boredom. Emptiness. It's frustrating and it's terrifying.
The girl leans in. She brushes her fingers along Natasha's bicep, down to her forearm and to her wrist.
Natasha swallows, trying to focus. Much to her dismay, she can't remember a single trick. She feels like she doesn't even know how to flirt anymore.
Then, you walk past. Black strapless bikini, a net wrap around your waist, tan lines on your shoulders. You walk past, barely noticing them, but Natasha jumps up and pretty much dumps the girl she was talking to.
You don't pay her any attention. It only makes things worse.
You round a corner, and Natasha puts her hands on your waist. You turn your head to look at her.
"I thought you had somewhere else to be."
Her thoughts falter. Then, she shakes her head.
"Nowhere else", she promises, kissing the back of your neck. "Where you going?"
"The pool", you say, adjusting the tote bag you've got slung over your shoulder. You weave through the crowds of half-naked people.
An hour later, you're both in the water. You haven't forgotten about her flirting at the bar, but she has. The second you walked by, that other girl was off her mind.
You're in the water, a drink in your hand and Natasha standing behind you with one arm circled around your waist. Her fingers slip under the strap of your bikini top, and she pulls at it to let it snap back. You glare at her, but she just smirks.
You're surrounded by your friends. Wanda is sitting on the edge of the saltwater pool, a cocktail in hand. Clint is snoring on one of the loungers. Sam jumps in headfirst, making Wanda squeal when she gets splashed with water.
Natasha leans in, lips against your wet shoulder. Water glistens on your skin. Hours pass, and the sun dips lower. Everything is washed in orange and gold. You're facing her now, arms wrapped around her middle. She runs her hand up your back and gently tugs at the clasp of your bikini, but this time, she doesn't let it snap. She just holds it.
You're staring. You both are. She's in way too deep.
The group asks whether you want to go to some club. You agree and go back to the hotel the change.
It's just the two of you now, hands brushing and skin sun-kissed, barely clothed. You both prefer this, but neither of you says it out loud. You step into the elevator, only in swimwear and with your hair damp and smelling like saltwater. Natasha so close, skin still damp from the pool.
The numbers on the panel tick. She watches your reflection in the elevator's mirror. You catch her eye and tilt your head. She pushes her hands into the pockets of her swimming trunks and looks away.
"You okay?"
"Fine", she mumbles. She's not one to get scared easily, but she's terrified.
You hum, unconvinced, but don't press further. It dings, the elevator doors slide open, and you step out. Natasha trails after you, noticing way too much. The strap of your tote bag sliding off your shoulder shouldn't be important. The water drops rolling down your spine shouldn't be important.
You shouldn't be important. This started as a fantasy, a hookup. Nothing that should've lasted more than a night or two. And yet, here she is. Not walking past your hotel room to get to her own, but stepping in right after you.
Inside, it's cool from the air-conditioning. Natasha plops down on your bed, hands tucked under her head and legs stretched out. She watches you as you dry your hair with a towel, and your eyes meet. It's quiet, way too quiet, and you clear your throat.
"We're leaving in ten", you remind her.
"We have to?", she asks. You glance at her, already in front of the mirror and changing into a dress. She swallows.
"You told them we'd go."
"Changed my mind."
"Well, I didn't." You adjust the straps of your bra. "What, you want to miss out on a night in Miami?"
"We have other nights."
You slip into a dress, but internally, you've slammed your foot down on the brakes. Natasha shifts on the bed, turning her head to look at the ceiling instead. You watch her through the mirror, something inside you twisting. You're not sure you want to leave, either.
"You okay?", you ask quietly.
Her head lolls to the side. "I'm good."
You hesitate. "We don't have to go, you know."
"It's fine. We said we would."
"I mean it." You pad to the bed and sit down beside her. She rolls onto her side, her hand trailing over crisp white bedsheets and coming up to rest on your thigh. "We'll order room service."
"No more cheeseburgers", she says.
You smile faintly. Tony has been in charge of getting everyone food a few times too many.
"No", you say, brushing some hair away from her face. "Anything else."
She hums. She glances at your face, then averts her eyes. Her head tips forward and her lips press against your knee. You reach out absentmindedly, running your fingers through her damp hair.
"Don't tell me you're tired", you mumble, smiling.
"Not tired enough", she says. She tugs at the hem of your dress. "So we're not going?"
You sigh. "Apparently not. Why?"
"May as well take this off."
You laugh, swatting at her hand. It's no use, though — she grabs you, pulls you down with her, keeps you trapped with her arms. You squirm.
"That's the real reason, huh?!"
"Maybe", she concedes, grinning. She kisses you, her hands moving to bunch up the fabric of your dress around your thighs. Hands roam bare skin, slowly, memorizing it. She pulls away and presses her lips to your shoulder, then her eyes drift.
For a moment, she just stares.
You nudge her.
"Natasha."
She blinks, meeting your eyes. Right — keep moving.
You're not used to her being this slow. Hands seem to move in slow motion. Lips drag across skin. Her nose brushes against yours.
The dress comes off and is tossed aside. You roll on top of her, feeling how warm and damp from the pool she still is.
"I should've gotten you a towel", you mumble, cupping her face. "You'll get a cold, with the a/c on."
Natasha just smiles. She tucks you against her body, forehead leaning against yours, and reaches into her swimming trunks. Hand around her length, she lazily palms herself before starting to pump herself to full mast. Not that much is missing, anyway.
"I'll be fine", she replies.
Her lips brush against your forehead. She keeps her hand around herself, but doesn't rush it. Her movements are lazy, unhurried. For the first time ever, you feel like your time isn't limited. It's a nice feeling. Maybe you'll let yourself get used to it.
She tugs off the swimming trunks, the fabric clinging to her skin. Finally, she rolls on a condom. Nudges your thighs apart, moves one to rest over her hip.
"Come here", she mumbles, one hand cupping the back of your head. "Let me feel you."
The head of her cock taps against your entrance, teasing you. You do have all the time in the world.
A breathless little moan escapes you. Her skin is cool from the a/c, with an undercurrent of heat beneath it. You press closer, making her strokes deeper. Her hips roll into yours, her arm stays wrapped around your waist. You meet every thrust, eyes slipping closed.
"Fuck", you breathe.
"You're good, baby."
Defined abs flex with every roll of her hips. You tug her closer, even deeper, and she grips your hip in an effort to stop herself from rutting into you mindlessly.
Your hand slips between your bodies. Your thumb finds your clit, swollen already, and circles it. Breathless little sounds escape you.
Natasha moans. She kisses you, traces your spine with her thumb, gently presses you down into the mattress. It's lazy, soft, and you've found a steady rhythm that works for you.
You're slick with arousal, but pulling out and rocking back in is still a challenge for her. Natasha grabs your thigh and pushes your knee to your chest, opening you up more. You whine and break the kiss, mouths inches away as you both breathe heavily.
"Not gonna last long at this rate."
"We got all night", she pants, thrusting her throbbing tip against something deep — so deep it makes it your hips stutter. "You got plenty of time to last long."
She's in so deep she barely has to pull back. She just grinds in deeper, cursing under her breath whenever you clench around her. Her cock is swollen, aching and twitching, and she can feel herself get closer to the edge as well.
Your hips jerk off the mattress when she rotates them with her hands. She laugh, voice rough, and kisses your throat.
"Yeah?"
You nod, clutching her biceps. "Right there-"
"You got it, baby. You got me."
Another roll of her hips. The pleasure builds, making all your nerve endings tingle with the approaching orgasm.
Breathy pants against your neck. A hand maps out your side, your thigh. Groans in response to whimpers, the sun outside disappearing from the horizon. A hotel room, darkened by the lack of sun and cold from the air conditioning.
The heat increases. She starts pounding into you, her nose nuzzling your neck. More kisses.
"I'm close."
"Me too."
"Wanna cum in you."
Your mind jumps back to the first time you did that. Back at the sorority party, after you'd had that fight. You remember the feeling, and a part of you craves it, but you also know you got incredibly lucky back then.
"Don't want to be a mom yet", you say, words punctured by little grunts.
Natasha whines at the mere thought. She loses rhythm before you do, her thrusts becoming sloppy and desperate.
She comes first — hard. You feel the way the condom swells when she spills into it. You feel her throb, feel the continuous twitching against your walls. It pushes you over the edge as well.
Thighs trembling and hips rutting, you moan. Natasha catches your mouth, swallowing every sound, and keeps rolling her hips until you stop.
Her hips twitch. She's wrecked, but there's no way she's pulling out. She kisses your collarbone instead, dazed and spent.
"Nat", you mumble, aftershocks coursing through you. "I'm full."
"Fuck", she pants. Her head drops forward and her forehead comes to rest on your shoulder. "Feel so good."
"Better than the club."
"Agreed."
You spend hours like this. Intertwined on your bed, in the shower, over the table. When you finally decide to call it a day, Natasha's too tired to think properly.
Her face is tucked against your side. Her hand is on the inside of your thigh. She nudges your ribs with her nose.
Two words make everything better and worse.
"You're different."
. . .
Things go both up- and downhill. Sometimes, everything seems perfect. She kisses you in front of others, tipsy and clingy. She sleeps in your bed. She washes the salt out of your hair and kisses the underside of your thighs.
Red lipstick on her shirt colors, her nails painted with your favorite nail polish. Risky snaps and smelling like your perfume. Secretive kisses, messy kisses that end in spit-slicked lips, smiling into kisses before pulling away just to hear you whine.
She loves every second. Every second of it terrifies her, but she loves it.
She doesn't know why she ends up ruining it.
There's something that feels way too serious about waking up under you every morning. About how defensive she gets. How she uses sunscreen to draw shapes on your back. Your friends teasing her isn't helping, either.
It's harmless at first. It hurts, but it's harmless.
She disappears at a party. You have no idea where she goes, or what she's doing. When she returns, she doesn't tell you anything.
She's always been touchy, and that hasn't changed. Her hand ends up on someone's thigh. Her arm rests over someone's shoulder. You try your best to ignore it.
Then, the text messages. They light up her screen at night, flashing names you don't recognize. Natasha grabs her phone and flips it over. You scoot away from her.
She ignores the people who text her, but she doesn't tell them to stop, and she doesn't block them, either.
During another party, she's without you. It's rare that this happens, and she knows it. But the others know it, too.
"Single again?", Tony asks, handing her a vodka shot. She rolls her eyes but doesn't respond, instead knocking back the shot. "Where's your girl?"
She rubs her eyes. They're tearing up from the alcohol. "Seriously, shut up."
"No, I mean it. Where's Y/N?"
"Maybe they broke up", someone adds unhelpfully.
"Can't break up if you were never dating in the first place."
"Were you dating? I mean, with your track record..."
Natasha averts her eyes, jaw tense. She leans against the wall and starts counting the cigarette butts on the ground. But she's panicking, and she doesn't get far.
"Come on", Clint says, nudging her. He has no idea just how much damage his words are about to cause. "You can tell us, you know. We'd love to know if someone finally got you to dip your toes in the monogamy-pond."
She has two options.
One: admit she's all in with you.
(Not happening. She hasn't even been able to admit that to you, or herself.)
Two: prove that nothing's changed.
(How the fuck is she supposed to manage that?)
Natasha drags a hand down her face. She feels hot all over, her cheeks tingling, her fingers numb. She steps away. They all start talking at the same time, a chorus of we weren't being serious and come on and take a joke, man.
She edges past a small group of men and bumps into some girl. Natasha barely pays her any attention, but the girl's eyes linger. She watches her slide onto a barstool and order a shot from the bartender.
She downs a shot, then another. The girl watches her for a while, then she sits down next to her. Natasha glances at her, barely reacting.
Sun-kissed skin, glowing. Wavy blonde hair. Red dress, barely-there and accenting every curve. Exactly the kind of girl she used to go for.
Glossy lips tug into a smile. She touches her bicep and runs her fingers down to her forearm.
"Alone here?", she asks quietly. Her head tilts. Natasha curses silently when the simple mannerism reminds her of you.
"Nobody else around me, is there?"
"I suppose not." The girl leans in. Her breath is sweet and fruity, with notes of alcohol woven into it. "Oh. But now there is."
Natasha smiles reluctantly. The girl is flirting, and she's about to let it happen. This is her opportunity to prove she's still herself, prove that nothing's too serious yet.
Too many shots. Too much alcohol, even for Natasha. She's not someone who likes to feed into stereotypes, but she's Russian, and she's been drinking for way too long. She can hold her alcohol — still, she ends up drunk and with some girl in her lap.
Natasha doesn't even know her name. She comes up with the genius idea to call her Blondie.
More alcohol. Suddenly, she feels unfamiliar lips press against hers. Ignoring the nauseating feeling of guilt in her stomach, she kisses her back harder. Her tongue gets sucked into the girl's mouth, hands squeeze and roam her biceps.
"Wanna get out of here?"
Natasha, drunk but still able to think, hesitates. Blondie cups her jaw.
"Getting shy on me?", she teases. That hits her right where it shouldn't.
They get up. They stumble to the hotel. They burst into the room.
Lips clash, hands unbuckle a belt. She hardens slightly, but it's nowhere close to what you manage to do to her. Blondie starts peppering her jaw with kisses, and her hand dips under the waistband of her boxers. Natasha's head is spinning, drowning in panic and vodka.
She wants to tell herself this doesn't mean anything. That this just proves she's still herself. But she knows the truth.
She feels her hand around her half-erect cock. She grabs her wrist.
"Wait", she says, swallowing. "I don't-"
The girl pouts. "I thought you wanted this."
Natasha shakes her head. Does she want this? No. Does she know what she wants, though? She's not sure.
She looks away. The girl starts moving her hand inside her boxers. Natasha's stomach turns.
The door clicks open.
For a moment, all you can do is stare. You don't even process it at first. It's too surreal. Natasha wouldn't do this. She's known for sleeping around, but those last few months couldn't have been in vain.
And yet, the air smells like alcohol and sweat. Natasha and some girl are half-naked, and they're clearly in the middle of something you don't want to know about. Hand still in her boxers, wrapped around her, touching what you had in your mouth just hours ago.
Your heart stops, then slams against your ribs. First, you feel nothing — then it's just pure anger. The other girl glances at you, lazily, and you'd love to do some serious damage with that chair to your right.
Natasha, immediately sobering up, curses and pushes the girl away. You're out of the door already, storming down the hallway. You hear footsteps behind you, and you change your mind about taking the elevator. Instead, you take a turn and rush down the stairs.
"Y/N, wait! Fuck-"
You shake your head, running faster. She's close behind.
You make it into the lobby. Natasha's running, shoving people aside. Her heart is racing, and for the first time ever, she feels like she truly fucked up.
She's done similar stuff before. Slept with girls only to ignore them literal hours after, ghost people, lie and cheat and hurt the ones around her. It feels different now. Worse.
Finally, she makes it. She reaches for your wrist, fingertips grazing your skin, but you whip around and pull away.
"Don't fucking touch me!"
"Please, please just listen-"
"Listen? I'm supposed to listen? Go on then, explain!"
Natasha stops in her tracks. She starts babbling, face flushed and hands shaking. You're still in the lobby, and people are looking at you weird, but you block them out. You block everything out, everything except the hot, boiling feeling of disappointment in your veins.
You knew it from the beginning — falling in love with Natasha can't end well. Here you are now, four months later, and you realize just how right you were.
"Look, I- I regret this, okay?", she says, desperately, pathetically. "I didn't want it to happen. I just- I drank, I drank too much, and she was right there, and I was terrified-"
You let out a bitter, hurt laugh. "Oh, you regret it? Well, that changes things. I'm sorry for assuming."
"No, baby, I mean it", she says, eyes pleading, and grabs your hand. You draw back as if singed by her touch. "Please."
"No", you say. You can feel the moisture forming in your eyes, the tears way too close. "No. Seriously. Fuck you."
"Y/N..."
"You're so full of yourself", you spit, stepping back. She steps forward again, but you rebuff her attempt once more. "You really think you're worth any of this? That any sane person will keep playing this game for you?"
Her face falls. She shakes her head, trying to pretend like your words didn't cut to the bone.
"You're not worth it", you say. "You're not worth any of it."
Natasha has to agree. All she can do is watch as you leave.
. . .
You ignore her. You block her. You stay away from her.
And still, somehow, she's everywhere.
On campus, at parties, outside the library. In basketball shorts and hoodies, an iced tea or black coffee in hand. Apologies lay on her tongue, ready and waiting to be served to you, but you're not in the mood to listen to any of them.
Natasha knows she's being pathetic. She's gone from 'the girl who doesn't chase' to 'the girl who's sadder to look at than a blind puppy'. She used to get any girl she wanted, no matter who, but now, the one girl she likes can't even bear to look at her.
She's aware you don't want to hear it, but she keeps trying, anyway. In the hallways, when you're on the way to class (you start regretting ever telling her where your seminars take place), in the cafeteria (which you start to avoid going to), in the parking lot.
"Can we talk?"
"No."
"I'm sorry."
"I don't care."
"Y/N, please."
You whip around. "Can you quit that?!"
Natasha freezes, hands lifted. Your chest twists at the sight — almost half a year ago, not too far away from where you're standing right now. A basketball and a girl that was a little too cocky. If you'd known, would you've still taken that same route? Or would you have taken a detour?
"I'm sorry", she repeats, more quietly. "I don't know what to say. I don't know how to make it better. But I miss you, and I'm sorry, and..."
And what?, she thinks. And please take me back? And I've never been this miserable over anyone before? And I love you?
She still can't say any of it out loud. She just rubs the back of her neck and shifts on her feet.
You stare at her, waiting, not saying a word. You're letting her sweat because she deserves it. You're letting her hope that you might forgive her.
Then, you turn around. You leave abruptly, not even bothering to give her the satisfaction of a response. Natasha stands there, staring, before finally reacting.
"It wasn't that serious, anyway!"
You flinch. Just barely, but she notices anyway, and her blood runs cold. She can't fathom why she'd even say that — all of this is her fault.
You leave. Again.
. . .
It's midnight when something hits your window.
You're in bed, not doing much. Staring at the ceiling, scrolling through whatever social media app your finger clicks on first, trying to somehow fall asleep.
It's quiet, aside from the rain outside. It's been storming for hours at this point, but the heavy downpour has turned into a slightly gentler hissing.
Then, a thump against your window disrupts the near-silence.
You sit up with a start to look at it. Faint cracks have appeared in the glass, forming a suspiciously circular shape. You hesitate for a second — god knows who's throwing shit at your dorm window in the middle of the night. This is New York, after all. Tons of crazy people running around, even on campus. Maybe it'd be safer not to check.
Then, it hits you. You blink, slowly, before getting up and padding to the window. You open it and look down only to find out it's Natasha. She's standing there, basketball in hand and bottom lip briefly tugged between her teeth, her clothes and hair soaked from the rain.
"Can we talk?", she pleads.
You stare at her. You step back and close the window.
The second you're back on your bed, Natasha exhales in frustration. She's panicking, rubbing her face and clenching her jaw. She has to do this, though. She has to get you to talk to her.
She lifts her hands and aims again. The ball flies through the air and slams against the window again — this time, too hard.
Glass shatters, a basketball shooting straight into your room. You stare at it in disbelief, too shocked to react, before finally jumping up. You grab the first thing you find, which is a half-empty vodka bottle, and step in front of the window to hurl it at her.
Her eyes widen and she barely dodges it. It shatters on the pavement, clear liquid spraying.
"What the fuck is wrong with you?!", you yell, grabbing the next object. Another bottle, this time a plastic one. She curses when it hits her shoulder.
"Y/N, please-"
"No!" You search your desk frantically. You grab one of your old French books. Natasha jumps aside.
"Jesus Christ! Can we not make this a pattern?"
"Oh, you're sick of patterns?", you yell. You see a pair of scissors and immediately know what to do. You return to the window, basketball and scissors in hand, and her jaw slackens. "That's funny!"
"Wait", she says, scrubbing her hand down her face. "That thing's damn expensive."
You glare at her, breathing heavily. "That's your priority right now?"
"I'm not saying that, but I do care about it-"
The blade stabs into the rubber. Air hisses. The ball deflates in your hands, and you toss it in front of her feet. Natasha winces.
"That was a limited edition, babe."
"I don't fucking care!"
Natasha looks up. For the first time all night, you feel something close to guilt. She's drenched, defeated, water dripping from her hair and down her face. Her hoodie is completely soaked, and her expression is absolutely wrecked. She's so unlike the cocky girl that hit on you not too long ago that she's almost unrecognizable.
In that moment, you hate her. Still, she's looking at you like you're the only thing that matters.
"Tell me how to fix it", she pleads. "Just tell me what to do."
You glare at her, still out of breath. The anger is making your blood boil, hotly and thickly.
"Get your ass upstairs", you hiss. "NOW."
Natasha looks like she just short-circuited. She's frozen in place, blinking up at you through the rain, water drops catching in her eyelashes. Slowly, she grabs her deflated basketball and starts moving to the front door of the building.
Wet sneakers squeak, her steps heavy. She walks up the stairs and finds your dorm — stickers on the door, ranging from Strawberry Shortcake and Tinkerbell to a lipstick kiss print and a heart with the words 'try me' inside. She hesitates before knocking.
The door opens. She slips into your room, clutching that stupid shell of a ball like it'll save her. You slam the door shut.
Your room is too you. She used to love it, in a way. Pink blankets, vanilla candles, lipstick marks left on your desk from that time she had you bent over it.
She turns around and her thoughts falter. A flimsy blue babydoll dress, lacy and short. Your thighs are on full display, distracting her a little too much.
Why did you have to wear this? How is she going to focus?
"And?", you prompt.
"Uh...", she says dumbly. She's staring, and she's not able to stop. "I, uhm..."
Natasha's soaking wet, freezing and humiliated. She came here to patch things up with you. And now, her biggest problem is that she wants to bury her face between your thighs.
It's too late when she drags her gaze back up. You've caught her staring.
"You've got to be fucking kidding me! You're still thinking with your dick?!"
"No, I-"
Her back thuds against the wall and she winces, but no complaints come from her. She's aware that she deserves this, so she doesn't fight back.
You shove her, again and again, letting her body hit the wall. She's bigger than you, towering over you, strong enough to grab you and haul you across the room. Yet, you've got the upper hand.
"Say something, you coward!"
You need her to react at this point. You need the silence to stop, need her to do anything else but stand there and take your rage like a kicked puppy.
Silence. Barely a reaction. You fist the front of her soaked hoodie and shake her. Your heart is thumping against your chest.
"You had a ton to say when you were hitting on me!", you shout. "Now you'll just stand there?"
She nods weakly. It's enough to make your chest burn as the desperation flares again. She can't be that indifferent.
Tears burn in your eyes, hot and stinging. You continue to shove her, keeping this one-sided fight alive. Because that's what it is — one-sided. It has to be when your counterpart is acting like a damn vegetable.
"Fucking fight me, Natasha!"
An order, or a plea. You're not sure.
She stares at you, gaze trailing to your lips. She shouldn't be thinking about kissing you, or about taking off your dress and letting it slip to the floor. She should stay rational. If she does something dumb, she's done for. She—
"So we're not hooking up, I guess."
Oh.
Eyes wide, heart stopping for just a split second. Oh, she's dead.
If you were mad before, you're livid now. You slam her against the wall, making her let out an 'oof' for the first time since this started. It's not just a spat, it's a full blown fight. The worst one you'd ever have, if you think about it.
Your fists thunder against her chest, then you grip her hoodie again.
"I'll kill you, you fucking bastard!"
The back of her head hits the wall. She grunts, finally grabbing your wrists. But her grip is as gentle as possible, considering you immediately try to break free from her grasp.
"Hey", she says, out of breath and pleading. "I wasn't thinking. I'm sorry."
"Seems to be a common theme with you!", you hiss, tears gathering in your eyes. "Fuck- let go!"
"Only if we talk!"
"Let go!"
She shakes her head. You struggle against her grip, twisting your wrists and kicking and fighting, then the tears break free. You sob, the noises tainted with frustration, and thrash against her.
"I hate you", you sob out. The words hit her right in the chest, like gunshots and needles all at once. "You led me on for half a year, and for what?"
"I wasn't leading you on", she promises, desperate to fix things. But god, it's hard to fix something you think has already shattered. "Please believe me. I just- fuck, I'm bad at this."
You shake your head, breathless and sobbing and furious, and slam your arms against her. "Stop talking! Fuck, just- just-"
Natasha's heart is beating so fast she thinks it'll jump right through her chest. Not a good idea. She's pretty positive that if that happened, you'd grab and squish it until it bursts like a balloon.
"Please hear me out", she begs. "Just for a moment. Fuck, Y/N, I- I-"
You sob, fists managing to hit her chest once more.
"You what?"
"I love you."
You freeze. There aren't many things you're certain of when it comes to her. Everything feels like an illusion, like something that could change tomorrow.
What you are sure of, though, is that she's never said these three words to anyone.
The question now, though, is whether this is an illusion as well. Whether she's trying to find a way out of this by telling you another lie.
"You think I believe anything you say?", you sob, the tears coming harder.
"I mean it", she says, squeezing your wrists and rubbing her thumb across your skin. Her eyes search your face frantically, trying to see if you'll listen for at least a second. "I love you, and it's fucking terrifying, but I do, I love you, and- fuck, I'm not used to this."
You shake your head, unwilling to let her words cut too deep. But they do, they cut, and not only to the bone but through the bone.
"If you loved me, you wouldn't have done that. You wouldn't have slept with someone else, you- you wouldn't have made me stay just friends."
She decides not to comment that, technically, she was about to sleep with someone but didn't go through with it. You're not hitting her anymore, but if she dared voicing that thought, you'd probably straight-up murder her just like you did her poor basketball.
"Because I'm not used to any of this", she says, voice quieter. "I've never been in an actual relationship, Y/N. I don't do that. I sleep with girls and move on. I don't- I don't just fall in love. But I fell in love with you, and I'm too fucking stupid to act right."
You stare at her, breathing heavily and swallowing. She sounds sincere. You feel like an idiot for thinking that, but fuck, she sounds like she means it. And that is the worst part.
You're certain this might end up killing you eventually. But your lips press against hers just as suddenly as she appeared in your life.
You kiss her. Hard, desperate, furious. Natasha, stunned, hesitates before putting her hands on your waist. You cup her face, grabbing it, and tug her closer.
Your lips slam against hers, again and again. You walk backwards. Natasha, confused and hardening amid all of this chaos, follows obediently.
You suck on her tongue. She exhales, shuddering against you. Her hands tighten around your waist.
You push your hand into her shorts. She pauses, startled.
"Fuck me", you say. "Do something right."
"Y/N, you-" Natasha cuts herself off, breathing heavily. Then she's all over you, pushing you down on the bed, kissing and sucking on your neck, teeth scraping against skin. Hands under her damp hoodie, nails raking down her back and drawing blood. Her breath stutters, her face is pressed against your neck.
She wants to fix this, fix whatever's left of you. Return to what you had and make it better this time.
She kisses down your throat and reaches your chest. Latching onto your breast through the thin fabric of your dress, her hands push your legs apart.
Lacy underwear comes off. Her fingers are cold against your slick heat, making them slide in easily. She sucks on your boob, leaving a wet stain on the delicate fabric. Your back arches.
You grind against her, head thrown back. "Not like this", you pant. "Get on the bed."
"What?"
"You heard me." You sit up, grabbing the front of her hoodie. "Come on, asshole."
Natasha doesn't let anyone boss her around. But it's you, and she's done enough damage, so she scoots off you and lays down. You lean over her, your hair creating a curtain around your faces, and kiss her. Your hands trail down her front, right to her shorts. You pull them down just enough to be able to straddle her cock, easing it into you and stretching you out.
You roll your hips against hers, the tears having dried on your cheeks. You stare down at her, both of you out of breath, and fist the damp fabric of her hoodie.
The bed creaks beneath you. Cold gusts of wind enter the room through the broken window. She feels the same — throbbing, filling you entirely, her hips thrusting off the bed — but something's off.
You push the feeling aside and bob up and down, moaning quietly, your breasts bouncing with every movement. Natasha watches you, both mesmerized and worried. The fight was intense. You were sobbing, thrashing — for good reason. But now, you're riding her like a you've forgotten about everything.
She opens her mouth, wanting to say something. You grip her hoodie tighter.
"Don't."
"Y/N, are you-"
"Don't make it worse."
She keeps her mouth shut. She grips your waist instead, fucks up into you, letting you take what you need.
Is this what you need?
It used to be. You're not sure anymore.
A few more thrusts. Natasha thumbs your clit. Watches you fall apart for a second time that night. Comes when you do. You ride it out, pulsing around her, feeling her hot seed spill into you. Three, four spurts, heavy and filling you up.
You shudder, thighs sticky, and lift your hips to make her pull out. Coldness surrounds what was once enveloped in tight heat. Natasha wishes she could make you sit back down, but she's not in the position to ask for anything anymore.
You roll off her and lay down on your back. Shoulder to shoulder, your feet right next to the middle of her calves. You're right next to each other, but there may has well have been hundreds of miles between you.
She hesitates before glancing at you. Your eyes are staring up at the ceiling, face blank, distant.
Her fingers brush your hand. You don't pull away. She intertwines them with yours.
"Nat?"
Your voice startles her, makes her breath hitch. She closes her eyes. "Yeah?"
"You should go."
Despite having anticipated this, her heart drops. It takes her a bit to get out of her frozen state and sit up. Part of her thinks like she'll never feel this again, so she just sits there for a moment.
The various shades of lipstick on your nightstand. The high heels next to your closet. The fucking shards on the floor.
You, in bed, refusing to look at her.
She gets to her feet and falters. This can't be it, but this is it. At least that's what it feels like.
Natasha leaves her deflated basketball where she left it, right near the door. She puts her hand on the doorknob, twists it, and steps out.
This isn't it. It can't be. She'll make sure of that. But for now, all she can do is leave you alone for once.
You look up when you feel her linger. She's watching you, her body already half-concealed by the door. Then, her mouth opens.
"It was serious", she mumbles. "It never wasn't."
The door shuts.
. . .
You and Natasha ending up in the same place is a coincidence.
You were just trying to distract yourself, and Natasha got dragged here by Stark. Clint would kill him if he knew — he's been trying to keep her away from basically every girl in existence. Tony, on the other hand, believes she just needs to get laid.
She's told him that that's the last thing she needs. That that's what got her into this mess. But he doesn't listen. He's very convinced she just needs to 'act like herself again.'
"That one."
"No."
He turns, then points the mouth of his beer bottle at a girl with blue hair. "That one. Dyed hair, meaning she's probably unstable, meaning-"
She kicks his ankle. "Stop being a pig."
He whips around, looking offended. It's a show, though. It always is. "Excuse me? May I remind you of that girl in sophomore year? When you made up that story because she-"
"Okay, okay. Got it, I'm a hypocrite. Now stop trying to hook me up!"
He smiles, eyes sweeping across the room as he tries to find another victim. "You're sure? Give me five and I'll find someone with daddy issues."
Natasha sighs, knocking back a tequila shot. It burns, but not in a pleasant way. Whatever bar Tony dragged her into — the alcohol they serve is cheap, the lights flicker, and it smells like something rotten. But, according to him, it's the least pricey one in the area. Which shouldn't be an issue, considering he's rich and likes to splurge, but for some reason, he enjoys the low quality booze more.
He keeps pointing out various girls. 'Insecure. I can tell by the way she adjusts her dress.' 'Got dumped. Look how she keeps checking her phone.' 'Hey, a slut. Your soulmate!'
She almost rams her elbow into his side. Then, she spots you.
It's been almost two weeks since that night in your dorm. Two weeks of little to no sleep, of resisting the urge to apologize again, of regretting every tiny thing that happened since that night in Miami.
You haven't been doing better. You've been trying to move on, but it's hard. Moving on from someone who feels like home is like trying to move mountains.
There you are now, sipping cocktails and listening to some guy go on and on about something. He's been buying you drink after drink, and truthfully, you've been going along. Getting drunk isn't the worst thing you can think of in that moment.
Natasha blinks and rubs her eyes. Her heart is beating faster, rabbiting in her chest like it's trying to escape and run toward you.
"Oh. Oh, no. Not again."
She turns, frowning. "What?"
Tony gestures in your direction. "Haven't you done enough?"
"Okay, man."
"Seriously. Better find a new heart to rip apart."
She grits her teeth, clutching the shot glass in her hand. You're still oblivious about her being in the same room as you. Although, you seem to be oblivious about pretty much everything else, too.
She's seen the look on your face a bunch of times before. Too many times to not realize. You're drunk.
And the guy next to you? Still talking, still flirting, still pushing drinks in your direction. Still hovering.
You sway. He touches your side, right where your ribcage is, and tries to pull you aside. Natasha snaps.
Shoving her way through the crowd, she's by your side before Tony can tear away his eyes from some strawberry blonde girl. She moves next to you, wrapping her arm around your shoulders and essentially nudging the guy's hand off.
"What the fuck, dude?"
"Take a hike", she barks. "Can't you see she's drunk?"
He scoffs. "She's only had, like, a couple drinks."
"She looks like she's about to pass out!"
"Nat?"
She glances at you, startled and worried. "Hey, baby. You good?"
You look at her lazily, eyes squinted and head spinning. "You're here."
"Yeah", she murmurs, softening.
Whoever that guy was — it takes one look at the two of you to realize that his little plan won't work out. He clenches his jaw and walks off, fuming silently. He'd fight her if he didn't recognize her face. Of course it's Romanoff.
"I'm dizzy."
"Let me get you out of here", she says, looking for your jacket. It's not even May yet, and the nights are cold. She finds it and tries to get you to put it on. When that doesn't work, she wraps it around your shoulders. "Still can't hold your alcohol, I see."
"Fuck you", you mutter. But you're drunk and safe and warm, and for once, you don't mean what you said.
Natasha rolls her eyes and helps you up. She turns around, and thats all it takes — you trip and crash into the bar, knocking over a glass of wine.
"Hey!"
"Oh, hush", Natasha says, shooting a glare at the upset girl and steadying you. "That shit's cheap as hell, anyway."
"Burns, too", you add, grasping the front of her letter jacket.
She smiles faintly, your arm over her shoulders, and leads you outside. She has to bend over a little since she's taller, but she doesn't really care.
The night is cold, and the way to your dorm is longer than it should be. When she's on her own, it takes two minutes. With a drunk you by her side, however, it takes fifteen.
You stumble. You curse her out. You throw up into a hedge.
Going up the stairs is easy. Getting you into your dorm, however, is not. You're on the floor, one hand grasping the metal rods of the railing behind you, and ignore Natasha's attempts to coax you into your room.
"Get inside."
"No."
"Y/N."
"I'm tired."
"Your bed is right there."
Eventually, she just grabs you and hoists you over her shoulder.
Pajamas, water, bed. She sits down, hesitates before tucking you in. You stare at her, still not sobered up.
Wet eyelashes — did you cry? She didn't see you cry —, oversized shirt, smudged lipstick. A mess if she's ever seen one, and you're usually so put together.
"You should sleep", she starts. Your eyes flutter shut. "You need anything, before I leave?"
"You know damn well", you mumble, face half-buried in your pillow. She swallows.
"Painkillers?", she asks, ignoring what you said. "For the hangover. A bucket, maybe?"
"Don't do that."
Natasha exhales, slowly. She rubs the back of her neck and glances at your window. At least that's fixed now. Everything else still seems to be in shambles. Even if she tried to pick the shards up, they'd cut delicate skin and draw blood.
"What?", she asks reluctantly. Absolutely no part of her wants to know the answer, yet she can't help but ask.
"Don't act like you care."
She opens her mouth, but you've passed out already. Guilt churns in her stomach, but there's no way to get rid of it. She can't apologize — you're asleep. And even if you weren't, you probably wouldn't listen.
No apologies, then. Instead, she cleans up after you. Puts aside your dress, your high heels. Orders coconut water and bananas from some local convenience store that delivers this late at night (good for hangovers, apparently, at least according to the internet) and tucks you in.
. . .
There's no trace from her when you wake up. Just a note next to some groceries, saying: good for your hangover.
It takes you a moment to remember last night. You're disoriented, hungover, and the entire room seems to be spinning. Once the memories have fought their way through the mess in your head, you freeze. Everything seems to go silent, even the birds and cars outside.
A guy, putting his hands on you. Alcohol. Natasha. At the bar, in the street, in your dorm. Touching you without actually touching you.
Now, she's gone. No trace from her, except for a random stalk of bananas and a bottle of coconut water.
You stare at it, unsure. You unscrew the bottle and take a sip. Not bad.
Wiping your mouth with the back of your hand, you grab your phone to check it. No message from her, but Daisy sent you a picture of a flyer for the basketball game later that night.
Daisy: you coming? — 8.21am
You: forget it — 8.59am
Daisy: not a question anymore.
you're coming to the game — 9.00am
You: im really not — 9.00am
Daisy: school spirit or something
like that. you can't avoid her for the
rest of the semester — 9.01am
Unfortunately, she has a point. You fight it at first, but you know you have to go. Not for Natasha. Not so you can fix what's broken (though 'broken' is one hell of an understatement at this point).
You'll go. You'll watch. You'll leave. Maybe that'll help you leave things behind.
When you enter the university's gymnasium, you feel her friends' eyes on you. Not too long ago, your friend groups had mixed and mingled — Carol and Wanda, Sam and Daisy, Tony and Bruce. Now, they barely talk. Neither of you made them take sides, but it happened anyway. Everyone else seemed to split when you broke up, too. Though, it wasn't really a breakup.
You slip through small crowds of people, following Wanda and Daisy to a row of empty seats. It's loud already, with some pre-game playlist playing and everyone talking loudly. People throw popcorn, yell, laugh. It's rare that you feel out of place, but this time, you do.
"You really dolled yourself up", Daisy says, handing you a coke. "Is that lace?"
You glance down, realizing the neckline of your top is a little too low. You quickly adjust it. "I threw on the first thing I saw."
"Uh-huh."
"I can still leave", you hiss. She smiles and nudges you.
"Not yet", she mumbles, right as the teams walk onto the court. You follow her gaze and feel your heart speed up. "There we go."
Natasha. In her jersey, hair pulled back into a low bun, green eyes flickering across the stands nervously. It doesn't take long until she spots you. You both freeze, and the entire gymnasium may as well have noticed.
Nobody noticed, of course, except for Daisy and Wanda. They're all caught up in themselves. To you, it still feels like they did, because nobody else matters in that moment. It's you and her, and everything else is a blur.
Daisy doesn't dare say anything. She saw the look on your face, and she's not risking anything. Because even if she knows your relationship with Natasha was a whirlwind — it was still the most genuine thing she'd seen you get involved in.
Natasha averts her eyes. Knowing you still came here is both the worst and best thing in the world.
Carol, also on the team, noticed this little moment between you. She pats her back and tells her to come warm up.
The game starts. Natasha's team wins possession.
You stay in your seat, watching her. She's playing aggressive today, you can see that. Scoring hoops, pushing past defenders, blocking shots.
She's on top of her game today, and you refuse to acknowledge why.
Then, she runs across the court. She gets fouled, hard, and slips. You jump up right when she slams onto the court, a low thud echoing through the suddenly silent hall. But she bounces up like it's nothing.
"You looked worried there."
"She fell", you mumble, arms crossed over your chest. Daisy raises her eyebrows, but says nothing.
Halftime. Natasha's team is slightly behind, with the other team leading at 30-32. She makes her way to the bench and grabs her water bottle. She looks distracted at first, absentminded, but then she finds your face in the stands and you realize what exactly is distracting her.
Maybe it should've been obvious. Maybe part of you doesn't want to believe it, though.
You hold her gaze for longer than necessary. Daisy goes silent next to you, Wanda tilts her head curiously. You finally lower your eyes and fidget with the seam of your skirt.
The second half begins, and Natasha's team catches up as quickly as it loses the lead again.
You're actually frustrated for her. You watch the way her jaw tightens, how she briefly rubs her eyebrows, how she rolls her shoulders. It's a tough game, and even worse?: something's at stake. She's got something to prove.
She's getting more aggressive as the seconds pass, even forces a foul. When someone throws a cheap elbow while she's guarding someone and the referee doesn't call it, she loses it.
Your eyes widen as she gets in the referees face, snapping at him and gesturing with one hand. He tries to calm her down, but it seems futile. There are multiple things stressing her out, and there's only so much she can take. Your stomach twists at the sight, because despite everything that happened, her frustration still seems to be yours.
Eventually, she backs off and jogs back onto the court. Looking up, she searches for you. You nod, tentatively and your heart pounding, and she lowers her head and exhales.
One minute left before the game ends. The score is tied.
It's electric now — the players are sprinting, the ball is a blur. Natasha runs, dribbles, hesitates. She finds your face in the crowd, glancing at you for just a fraction of a second, and then jumps and swishes it through the net.
The gym erupts, the buzzer sounds. She doesn't hear any of it.
Her team is celebrating, and so are the people in the stands. Someone shakes and opens a bottle of beer to spray others with it, everyone is yelling, the cheers are so loud you feel like your eardrums are in genuine danger.
Natasha isn't celebrating. She's walking towards the stands, nervously wiping her hands on her shorts.
Whether this is a good idea or not, she doesn't know. But it's too late now. She's right there, right in front of you, only a row of people separating you from her. Out of breath, sweaty, adrenaline crashing. You stare at her, unsure, and watch her grab the bottom of her jersey.
She pulls it over her head and tosses it in your direction. You don't catch it — it hits your chest and falls into your lap.
You look at her, hesitating. Is she being serious?
She is. She stands there, staring at you, still trying to catch her breath. It's an impossible task, with the way you're looking at her.
Swallowing, she turns around. Daisy nudges you, and you finally grip the stupid jersey. It's still warm, smelling like sweat and cologne.
Natasha walks away, soles squeaking quietly on vinyl ground. She glances at you over her shoulder, briefly, but it's enough.
She looks away. You jump up.
You shove people aside and hop down the rows in front of you, reaching the court. You're practically sprinting at this point, desperate to reach her before she gets to the locker room.
You grab her, spin her around, kiss her so hard she almost stumbles. She groans, but it shifts into a soft whimper. She drops the bottle she was holding and grips your waist.
Around you, people are still cheering, still celebrating. But this is the real victory.
You deepen the kiss, drag your fingers through the damp baby hairs at the back of her neck. Her lips are salty, addictive, her body thrumming against yours.
Natasha tastes something sweet, fizzy, matching the way her stomach tingles. You're here, choosing her in front of everyone, and god, it feels good.
Time slows down. She inhales against your lips, sharply, her fingers digging into your skin. You get on your tiptoes, allowing her to stand a bit straighter. You pull away just enough to take a breath, and she makes a quiet noise of protest.
By the time you part, your lips are swollen and slick. Natasha's looking at you like you hung the damn moon, like you're the reason her heart is slamming against her ribs. Which you kind of are.
"You- I-"
You manage a smile, your fingers still playing with her baby hairs. How often does she get nervous? Once in a blue moon.
"You did good", you mumble, studying her. She swallows thickly. "Finally."
"I'm so sorry", she mumbles, wrapping her arms around you and pulling you against her. Your feet leave the ground. "I'm so fucking sorry. Fuck. It was all a mistake. I..."
You don't let her finish. You kiss her, again and again, until the tension slowly disappears from her shoulders. She pulls away and buries her face in your neck. It's not the basketball game that's leaving her shaking — it's you.
"You're a moron."
"Mhm." Her lips press against your shoulder.
"An idiot. An absolute buffoon."
"That's fair."
You pull away again, still clutching her jersey in your hand. Natasha gives it a quick little nod, and it looks so ridiculously shy you can't help but laugh.
"Say it", you tease, cupping her cheek. She frowns. "Come on. You're a big girl, aren't you?"
A deep breath in, then out. Her eyes sweep across your surroundings, making sure no one's listening.
"Put that on", she finally mumbles. "It's yours now. I'm yours."
You press another kiss to her cheek, then step away and put on her jersey. Your jersey, actually. Sweaty and damp, smelling like her.
Natasha smiles softly. She fidgets, shifts, then grabs your hand.
"We never had an actual first date, you know."
You hum. She's right. You hooked up, and then continued hooking up. There was never anything that even resembled an official date.
"What're you saying?"
"You, me." She squeezes your hand. "Maybe a nice restaurant? Or takeout? We can have a picnic. I don't know, I don't usually do this."
You want to say no at first. Not because you don't want to, but because the after game-celebration is in full swing. The entire team is talking about going to a bar.
But then you realize that Natasha hasn't spared them a single glance since the buzzer announced the end of the game. She's been here, with you, looking at you, asking you out on a date.
The fuckboy athlete who keeps everyone at an arm's length, now actually taking something seriously.
You kiss her, already leading her out of the gym.
"Yes. But no cheeseburgers."
✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷ ✷
🌙 tagged (as per request): @esposadejoyhuerta
#short n sweet au#short n sweet#natasha romanoff#natasha romanoff x reader#black widow#black widow x reader#lesbian#wlw#fanfic#x reader#marvel#marvel mcu#smut#fluff#wlw smut#moon’s fics
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Take A Break | Toto Wolff x Wife! Reader
Summary: Toto has been pushing himself too hard trying to get the upgrades sorted. As his concerned wife, you plan a surprise visit.
Warnings: Tooth rotting fluff. Bad writing
Requested: Yes by Anon (Hope I did this justice)
2024 season. There's a little blurb halfway through as well.
F1 Masterlist
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mercedesamgf1 just posted



liked by ynwolff_official, lewishamilton and others
mercedesamgf1 boss man hard at work
1,198 comments
ynwolff_official you better be looking after him
→ mercedesamgf1 yes, ma’am. we’re doing our best
→ ynwolff_official tell him if he doesn’t stop working late, he’ll be in trouble when he comes home
→ mercedesamgf1 stop making the admin team threaten me, schatz. they keep coming into my office shaking and you’ll get me into trouble with hr - toto
user1 tell him to make an insta
georgerussell63 he looks like a sith lord
→ ynwolff_official i think you mean, very handsome
→ georgerussell63 i’m not going to say that about my boss
→ alex_albon why not? you were telling me the other day that you think he looks much better in the white shirt than the black zip up
user2 anyone else think he looks tired lately?
→ user2 he’s been working extra hard to get the upgrades ready, i’m guessing
→ user3 plus wifey and jack haven’t been able to make a race in a while so he’s probably missing them after that triple header
user4 george won’t be getting those upgrades once yn tells toto that he wouldn’t admit he was handsome
→ mickschumacher i’ve already told
→ georgerussell63 betrayal



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Strolling through the Hungaroring paddock, you kept a tight hold of your son’s hand. Bustling bodies brushed past, paying the the pair of you no heed, which worked well with your surprise.
Over the past few weeks, Toto had been working tirelessly to ensure the upgrades were ready and working in time for the Hungarian Grand Prix, albeit to the detriment of his own health. He’d been sleeping less, running himself ragged to ensure Mercedes didn’t remain fourth in the constructors. After winning at Red Bull Ring and Silverstone, he knew the potential was there. All he had to do was unlock it. But that had meant shorter calls with his wife and son, fewer responses to messages and a growing distance that he hated feeling during the season. And so, arranging a surprise visit during race weekend had been the most obvious solution.
Mercedes hat sat atop his dark hair, Jack babbled about everything he could see as the tall form of George Russell guided you towards the garage.
“Hello, stranger.” Lewis’ voice met your ears when he caught sight of you. “Toto didn’t tell me you were coming. What’s up, little man?”
George vanished into the back of the garage, searching for the Team Principal. Leaning over to the Brit, you pressed a kiss to the cheek of the 7x WDC. Lewis gave your shoulders a squeeze before pulling Jack up into his arms, whisking him over to where the W15 was being polished.
“George, this better be important. I was in the middle of an analysis report-.” A disgruntled Austrian accent filled the garage, bringing a smile to your face. You could picture the deep frown twisting his handsome’s features without even turning to see it.
“Liebe?”
The silver arrows watched the tension seep out of their Team Principal’s face as he took in the appearance of his wife. Striding across the garage floor, he pulled you in for a tight hug, and pressed a chaste kiss to the side of your head. Aware of the eyes on you both, he had to refrain from pressing his lips to yours. Denying you both the deep kiss you truly desired.
“Surprise,” you whispered, slipping your arm around his waist. Your hand automatically rubbing soothing circles against his hip.
“I’m so happy you’re here,” he murmured into your hair, inhaling the familiar scent of home.
“You sounded like you needed us.”
“I always need you.”
“Well, then, let’s go rescue your son from Lewis.”
Holed up in Toto’s office, the Wolff family basked in their first moment of family time since over a month. Toto had ordered everyone to leave them alone until qualifying was due to start or somebody was dying. Thankfully, the team listened and so he spent the past hour listening to his son tell him about school and watching Lewis win a race on telly.
Fussing over the amount of coffee cups in the waste bin, you turned to lecture your husband on his inability to get enough rest but paused, mouth open. Curled up on the deep couch pushed against the wall, Jack was snuggled into his father’s lap. His iPad had fallen to the side, and soft snores escaped from his mouth. Glasses askew, Toto’s chin rested on his son’s head, eyes closed tight. Father and son, exhausted from the excitement of their day.
Taking a quick picture on your phone, you smiled at the sight of your family. Reaching into Jack’s backpack, you pulled out his blanket, draping it over your favourite boys.
“Ich liebe dich,” you whispered, pressing a kiss to each of their foreheads.
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mercedesamgf1 just posted



liked by georgerussell63, mickschumacher and others
mercedesamgf1 our favourite family 🐺
1,554 comments
georgerussell63 admin, you used the same quote for a photo of toto with me, lew and mick the other week?
→ mercedesamgf1 we were paid to do that
→ alex_albon great now he’s crying
→ landonorris ha! at least our admin love us more than zak
→ mclaren don’t tell on us!
mercedesamgf1 inside scoop; toto asked us to print out the photo of yn and jack to put in his office
mickschumacher does this mean i can take the little wolff karting?
→ ynwolff_official only if you promise to come for dinner
→ georgerussell63 and me?
→ user5 poor toto can’t escape his drivers even during his time off because his wife adopted them all
lewishamilton nice to see you and jack in the paddock again, yn
→ ynwolff_official and you, lew. hopefully we can attend a few more now that the summer holidays are here
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ynwolff_official just posted



liked by valterribottas, mercedesamgf1 and others
ynwolff_official my favourite part of summer break is the view
1,003 comments
mercedesamgf1 tell boss man to bring that smile back with him
→ ynwolff_official don’t worry. i’ll be sending him back to work extra happy
→ lewishamilton yn, love, this sounds less than family friendly
→ ynwolff_official oops
user6 oh she’s FEEDING us
user7 has george joined you for a sleepover yet
→ ynwolff_official of course. he’s like the son i didn’t ask for
→ georgerussell63 but you love anyway?
→ user8 silence speaks volumes
user9 yn wolff thirst trapping her husband was not on my 2024 bingo
→ user10 silly season is extra silly this year so yn obvi thought she would participate
→ user11 and we love her for it
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Requests for F1 smau's are open. You can see who I write for on my masterlist :)
#formula 1#f1#formula 1 smau#f1 smau#formula 1 social media au#f1 social media au#social media au imagine#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 headcanon#formula 1 drabble#formula 1 one shot#formula 1 fluff#formula 1 x reader#f1 imagine#f1 headcanon#f1 drabble#f1 one shot#f1 fluff#f1 x reader#toto wolff#toto wolff imagine#toto wolff headcanon#toto wolff drabble#toto wolff one shot#toto wolff fluff#toto wolff smau#toto wolff x reader
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🎁Baptise in Your Thighs Till it Hurts 🎁
🎁Pairings: Satoru Gojo x Reader x Ryomen Sukuna
🎁Summary- You are broke for Christmas, so you decide to take an offer to strip for some powerful CEO's, what you don't know is these two hand picked you, and now they're fighting over your body for Christmas- PWP there is NO PLOT lol
🎁CW- MDNI- Oral sex (m and f recieving) degradation, dollification lowkey, lots of dirty talk, Sukuna calls reader slut, whore etc- rough sex, threesome, eifel tower, multiple orgasms, p in v sex, multiple creampies, decorating reader w/xmas lights, Satoru whimpering and going feral, Sukuna smacking us around a bit, teensy bit of coke use, they're yandere, competitive sex 🎁WC- 5.1k
Comments and reblogs appreciated if you enjoy this smutfest (I'm shaming my ancestors with this one- (this header too cute for this FILTHY shit fr- this was a gift for hitting 3k followers- ya'll CHOSE thislol<3)

You’re not quite sure how you ended up here, dressed in a slutty christmas mini skirt, with white floof on the bottom, bright red fishnets and a little red top that’s covering almost none of your tits, dancing for a room of CEOs and business men. Handsome, tall, gorgeous fucking CEO’s, when you’re not in fact a stripper, on the night of Christmas Eve.
The offer had been way too good to turn down, you are slam broke after Christmas shopping and bills. There were a few other girls there, some already giving the men lap dances, the two men that are watching you eagerly, however, are Mr. Gojo and Mr. Sukuna, the ones that run this entire sky high building.
Mr. Gojo was towering tall, with shocking white hair and insane blue eyes, smirking as he watched you dance under the red glow of the giant room you all are in, it’s some insanely huge VIP room. Mr. Sukuna sits right by him, an ankle crossed over a knee, smirking at you as well, his shoulders are so broad it’s like that suit has to stretch over him, even his dress shirt is stretched on his strong chest.
He has tattoos decorating his hands, you wonder if they’re everywhere errantly as, they both watch you and murmur to themselves, you get self conscious, you wonder how you even got such an offer for this much money. Surely these men could get whoever they want, and probably experienced girls, you’re just a barista, and you only know them from serving their coffee.
One day one of their assistants came in and offered, so here you are, making more tonight then you would all month. You feel a set of ruby and azure eyes drinking in every inch of your body, as they sit alone on that red sofa, Gojo is sipping some fruity drink, Sukuna, whiskey on the rocks, vastly different, yet they both contain this cocky, rich aura.
“C’mere, sweets.” Gojo murmurs now, crooking two insanely long fingers, as the other women are taking the various men over to different rooms, giggling and running with drinks.
Is this… some sort of sex party!?
You walk over nervously, trying to get used to the insanely high platform heels, when Satoru yanks you on his lap, big hand splaying the smooth expanse of your back, bare in the scanty outfit. “Hello, Mr. Gojo.” You murmur, and he chuckles, hand slipping down to grip your ass as you sit on his thigh.
“You’re so cute. Isn’t she, Ryomen?” Satoru says softly, and Sukuna grins now, slipping a hand up your fishnet clad thighs, you gasp at the sensation.
“More than cute. Fucking sexy.” He snatches you off Satoru’s lap in two seconds, and Satoru huffs.
“Excuse me!? Rude.” Satoru snatches you back up, like you’re some toy, some little doll they’re playing with. “Me and her were talking.”
“I don’t wanna talk.” Sukuna has you back now, straddling him, it’s literally fucking obscene how you’re pressed against him, the only thing under this skirt is a bright red thong.
“Excuse me now? Are you all competing over me?” You ask, Sukuna snorts, gripping your chin roughly, squishing your cheeks.
“Mouthy brat, huh?” You glare, earning his eyebrows arrogantly.
“Ooh, she’s so cute mad, look at that nose scrunching up.” Satoru cooes, coming close and inhaling your hair, exhaling against your neck, tickling you.
“Are you sniffing me?” You demand.
“Oh she smells so good.” Satoru pulls back, grinning at you, and Sukuna turns your face to him roughly.
“Attention on me.” You roll your eyes, and earn his glare.
“I got paid to dance, not to do anything else.” You go to hop up, turning away, for you to get a resounding smack on your ass. You gasp, turning back to the two of them feigning innocence. “Listen, you two can fuck whoever, look at you all.”
They both stand now, Satoru directly in front of you, pressing you back against Sukuna’s hard body, men towering over you, men that smell good, that look good, that feel good. You gulp a bit, trembling now, feeling your nipples perk up, pressing on Satoru’s abdomen, and heat pool in your stomach.
“Sweets, all we want for Christmas is you.” Satoru says softly, leaning down, cupping your face, while Sukuna roughly grips your hips, his hard length already pressing on your back, as his mouth comes to your neck.
“You’re so fucking corny, Satoru, shut the fuck up.”
Satoru glares. “Yeah, fuck you, I’ll keep her to myself.”
“No you won’t. What he means is, we’re having you tonight, brat. We only want you.”
“We have only wanted you. Pretty barista.” Satoru smiles and kisses your lips now, with a lour ‘mwah’ earning Sukuna to turn your face to him, slamming a kiss, brutal and needy.
“You all… um I… mnh!” You cry out when Satoru’s cupping your breasts, thumbs brushing over your nipples, and Sukuna’s big rough hands slip around to your tummy, pressing on it, touching you over your panties, moaning.
“Already wet, Satoru. She’s so easy.”
“Stop talking about me like I’m an object. Assholes.” You glare back up at Sukuna, he seems even more pleased, Satoru reaches and touches you now too, making the panties sticky and drippy, as you clench around nothing.
“We’ll pay you double for the night.” Satoru says, and you sigh, shaking your head. “Triple?”
“I won’t fuck for money… I don’t even strip you know. Mnh!” You’re crying out again, head falling back on Sukuna’s strong chest, his starch dress shirt brushing your skin when he bites your neck, hard.
“Then let us keep making you cum all night, pretty.” Satoru’s biting the other side of your neck, your legs wobble so much you think you’ll just fucking collapse.
You feel the music thrumming along with your pounding heart and racing pulse, streaming through your veins, when Satoru’s walking you backwards, and you end up right on Sukuna’s lap. Satoru slides down your panties as Sukuna pulls up your skirt, his other arm wrapping your waist, while Satoru eyes your pussy, moaning while he gathers the slick pooling there.
“Oh my god she’s so fuckin’ pretty.” Satoru cooes, kissing the hood of your clit, you gasp at it, hands pulling on his hair. “Yes baby, pull me.”
Sukuna pulls your thighs apart as they threaten to close, laughing softly in your ear, his hands holding you open as Satoru’s part your lips. “Gotta get you nice and ready for us, brat.”
“Wh-what… I… Gojo!” You scream his name as he swipes his tongue up your slit, all while Sukuna is wrapping a huge tattooed hand around your throat.
“Satoru. While I’m drinking your pussy.” He looks up under snowy lashes at you, tongue dripping with saliva and your arousal. “She’s so yummy.”
Sukuna takes one of your hands, making you touch your puffy clit, then sucking on your finger, groaning out. “Fuck you taste good. Why don’t you cum for us, let’s feel you.”
You weakly whine out as Satoru is licking you again, this time fucking you with his tongue, Sukuna sloppy kisses you, biting your lips until they’re swollen, choking your throat tighter until you can’t breathe. Everything goes fuzzy as his ruby eyes glint, watching you hungrily as he squeezes away your oxygen, and Satoru’s tongue is in your velvety walls.
His nose bumps your clit as the wet muscle fucks you, until you’re screaming out, a hand pulling at his hair and earning his groan, when he flicks his tongue up to swirl your clit, making you cum so hard you nearly pass out. It washes over you in waves, all while Sukuna is controlling your breath, you scream out weakly, gushing wetness all over Satoru’s pretty face.
“Could crush your throat, y’know?” Sukuna whispers in your ear, letting you go as Satoru leans up, glistening from you and kissing you. You eagerly kiss him back, leaning up and crying out as Sukuna plunges two fingers in your slick hole, groaning at how your walls flutter. “Slutty little cunt.”
“Fuck.” Is all you manage, gazing at Satoru’s eyes, and Sukuna scoffs.
“I wanna keep you, I’ll eat you all the time.”
“That’s enough, up brat.” Sukuna taps your hip, Satoru helps you up, unsnapping your little bra, exhaling as your tits are revealed. Sukuna’s in front of you now, however, and Satoru sits, pulling you on him, pecking kisses up your neck as Sukuna’s pink hair is in your fingers, you pull at it and earn his moan. “Go ahead, put me where you want, little slut.”
“Little… you… ah!” He plunges his face against your cunt, devouring you at a pace you can’t stand, Satoru laughs now, turning your face to look into his pretty eyes.
“He’s so rude, I know Sweets. Oh…” You’re grinding on Sukuna’s face, head thrown back as you scream out, Sukuna bites your clit hard, the pain pricking you as Satoru is squeezing your tits. “You trying to outdo me!?”
Sukuna comes up for air, a psychotic look now on his face, he undoes his tie just a bit, before spitting on your clit, you’re gasping now. “I’ll always outdo you.”
“Will not!” Satoru says, but Sukuna plunges two fingers in your cunt, pressing up and down, working them in and out so quickly you’re a drooling mess. “Aww, look at her, so fucked out already.”
“Drooling, stupid pretty face.” You can’t manage a glare when Sukuna is fingering you like this, thick, long, calloused hands, and Satoru is pinching your nipples, kissing you and drinking in your cries, as Sukuna dives back down, one hand running over his cock, straining against his slacks, sucking your clit in his mouth as he’s pumping.
You feel the pressure building and building until your orgasm hits, you’re gushing ridiculously all over Sukuna’s face, wetness pouring on him as he laps it all up, sounds of the squelching wetness and him drinking you loud, even over the music that’s still playing. He sucks and bites each puffy lip, leaning back and smacking your pussy, as Satoru smacks your titties.
“Wh-what the… f-fuck…” You barely are able to think or function, much to their delight it seems.
“She came more for me. Amateur.” Sukuna says, and Satoru snorts, kissing a sticky hot trail up to your ear.
“She likes me better, I’m sweeter.”
“Tch, her cunt likes me better. Time to go take this somewhere else, though, what do you think, brat?”
“I’m no brat, you’re a dick.” You say with a scowl, he just smirks.
“Fuck you’re cute angry.”
“I’m not going anywhere with you.” Satoru has the suit jacket off himself and thrown over your shoulders, bringing you against him.
“See, she likes me more.” Sukuna rolls his eyes, hoisting you up over his shoulders like you’re nothing.
“Excuse me!? Set me down now!” Satoru smacks your ass, you glare at him now. “Really, you too?”
“It’s so bouncy, I’m sorry baby.” He leads you all out into the cold night, where you’re now shivering, until you’re plopped unceremoniously into a limo by Sukuna, laying you on the seat and eyeing your body hungrily, just in a skirt, ripped fishnets and Satoru’s open jacket.
“Fuck you’re pretty.” He murmurs, surprising you for a moment, you feel him hard and heavy over you, making your mind whirl. “My place.”
“No, mine!”
“Mine is closer.” He narrows his eyes up at Satoru, as his big hands slide down to your tits, and he’s bending over, sucking one into his hot mouth, you moan, body arching up against your will.
“You’re hogging her now! Oh fine but get up.” Sukuna sighs, releasing your nipple with a pop, but he just leans over you.
“Open that mouth, little slut.” You shake your head, and Satoru is laughing as Sukuna is opening your mouth for you.
“Told ya, she likes me more, I could ask her.” Sukuna spits in your mouth, you gasp, choking on it, he kisses you messy and sloppy, before getting up, grabbing the liquor bottle and downing a shot.
“Open, pretty.” Satoru says sweetly, but you feel he’s just as devious, though you can’t turn down his pretty eyes for shit. You do as he asks, to Sukuna’s anger, and Satoru spits in your mouth now too, humming as he closes your jaw. “Swallow. Open.” You do as he says. “You’re such a good girl for me.”
“Oh fuck you, Satoru.” Sukuna pops open a ring, you look in confusion as he takes a little line of white powder and snorts it, shaking his head.
“I want some!” Satoru leans up and snorts a line, taking some of the powder now and rubbing it all over your gums, making them numb. You gasp at the sensation, only for Sukuna to take some, spreading your thighs, shoving two fingers in your cunt, making it go numb.
“Oh my… what the…”
“Coke lips times two.” Satoru says with a maniacal laugh, opening his slacks then, gently brushing your hair back. “Why don’t you use them, baby?”
You’re on your knees in the seat, turned as Satoru pulls your hair up, and reveals his long, thick cock, pink tip drooling precum already. You feel your pussy clench around nothing, lips so fucking numb you can’t stand it. You lap some of the precum up, earning his whimper, Sukuna’s back behind you, taking another shot and rubbing your clit in rough circles.
“She’s soaking wet, must love being used.” Sukuna says, you hate it, that he’s right, but you focus on Satoru’s cock now, sucking it in your numb lips, he bucks his hips up as you do, starting to suck him inch by inch, drooling saliva down his length as his precum coats your tongue.
“F-fuck… baby…” Satoru’s shoving your mouth down on him, sliding his length down your throat, you choke on it as that tip hits your uvula, pussy starting to feel so good with the mix of the cocaine, your wetness, and Sukuna’s fingers. “Oh your throat… so tight- ah!”
You hear an unbuckle behind you, pulling up with a pop now, spit dripping in lines, Satoru exhales, kissing you again, before Sukuna has you turned, and you’re faced with his insanely thick cock. It’s as big as Satoru’s if not longer, but it was so much more girthy, you actually gulp, intimidated at how the fuck it’s going to fit, much to his pleased laughter.
You weren’t even sure Gojo would fit, but… that?
“Oh no. I need a shot for this.” You say, Satoru’s snickering and Sukuna strokes his length, grabbing your chin.
“Can’t take it, brat? Too big?”
“Jesus.” He hands you a shot now, you down it quickly, before kneeling back down, starting to lick at the thick reddened tip of him, oozing so much precum it’s ridiculous.
“You can take it, slutty brat.” He huffs, Satoru is running his tip along your soppy folds, exhaling as he watches your mouth slip down Sukuna’s length, you slowly take him bit by bit, feeling him tense and moan, his head falling back.
“Her pussy… oh my god.” Satoru whines out as his tip is running between your lips, teasing your clit and making you jerk, which Sukuna uses as an opportunity to shove your mouth down his cock further, you pull up sputtering.
“Don’t do that, ugh! Dick.”
“Excuse me?” He pulls your face up and smacks it lightly then, Satoru pulls you back against him.
“Don’t smack her pretty face.” Satoru kisses your cheek where it’s stinging, you glare at Sukuna, smacking him right back, making his cock twitch and Satoru snort in laughter as he pulls you back to suck him, fucking up into your mouth.
“She liked it.” Sukuna smacks your ass hard now, and you do like it, you’re moaning all over Satoru’s cock, slobbering on it. “Now get back here.”
“Ask nicely.” You say, and he shakes his head, brows raised as he leans over you.
“Fuck no. Come get this cock down your throat, if you can take it all I’ll make sure to pay you triple.”
“Nope, not wrecking my throat. I like to be able to swallow.” Sukuna rolls his eyes, yanking you back, you’re sucking him down helplessly. “You like it, don’t you, being used?”
You’re whining when Satoru’s stupidly long fingers sink into you. “She’s so ready to get filled.”
The car stops, and you’re wrapped back up in a jacket, this time Satoru has you picked up in his arms, bridal style versus Sukuna’s caveman tactics, as they lead you in an elevator up to Sukuna’s penthouse. You barely register how gorgeous his place is, how sleek and nice, when Sukuna’s yanking Christmas lights down, and Satoru’s sliding a Christmas hat on each of you.
“In the spirit you know.” You blink rapidly, Satoru has slipped off your skirt, eyeing your red fishnets. “Should we keep these on?”
“Yes but take off her heels, I feel she’ll try to kick me.” You giggle, earning both of their sardonic looks, and you then quiet. Satoru bends down, taking off your heels, as you stare at the lights Sukuna is holding in his hands.
“Sukuna… what the hell are those for?” Sukuna begins to wrap them under your tits, and soon Satoru and Sukuna are decorating you like some fucking tree, Satoru is wrapping one of your legs and literally giggling, and Sukuna one of your arms, the lights are glittering and glowing against your skin. “What the fuck, how coked out are you two?”
“Very.” They answer together, Satoru’s eyeing your tits hungrily, the rope of lights sits under and above them, pronouncing them beautifully, the santa hat tipping over his white hair just so when he smacks kisses on them.
“Me first.” Satoru says suddenly, and he’s carrying you over to the bed now, some insanely huge and fancy four post bed, with a beautiful floor to ceiling window outlooking the city.
“She’ll have to loosen up for me anyway.”
“Oh whatever.” You’re on your hands and knees now, the lights pressing into your flesh, Satoru’s burying his face against your pussy again, as Sukuna’s undressing, revealing a muscular, ripped body covered in black tattoos. He’s so sexy your mouth goes dry, much to the asshole’s pleasure.
“Cat got your tongue, brat?” He raises a brow, so cocky.
“Nope.” But you eagerly grab at his released cock, stroking him up and down, tongue flicking over the veins. Sukuna moans, head falling back, while you suck as much of him as you can.
“That’s it, she’s finally being a good girl.” Sukuna muses, Satoru’s got your clit in his mouth, making you so close you’re about to cum again, before he’s now lining his cock up with your little hole.
“Ready, sweets?” He asks, you turn back and look at him with lidded eyes, his lean, chiseled body, like made of marble.
“Y-yes.”
He smacks his tip on your cunt over and over. “And what do we say?”
“Please, Satoru- ah!” Satoru sinks his cock inside you in one long stroke, so long he bottoms out and hits your cervix, you scream out, opening your mouth for Sukuna’s thick ass dick to slam back in your mouth.
“F-fuck she feels s’good… she’s so tight.” Satoru whines, fucking into you, hands grabbing your bare hips, further pressing the little led bulbs and wires into your skin, you’re cumming all over him so quick it’s stupid. “So easy, huh? Just getting started baby.”
Satoru’s sweet boy act is essentially ended, he goes feral as he fucks into you, his heavy balls smacking your clit, you hear the noise of his skin smacking yours, and you gulping Sukuna’s cock as much as you can. “Look at me, now.”
You obey him, this random stranger, his voice commanding as he cups your face, fucking your throat as Satoru fucks your pussy. You’re so filled as they pull and push you between them both, choking you and stuffing you so full. Sukuna’s eyes are dilated to the point they look black, and Satoru’s now rolling his hips just so, forcing your eyes to roll back in your skull at how good it feels.
“Fuck she’s tryna milk me.” He whines out, leaning over you, you feel drips of his sweat on your bare skin when he’s bending over you completely, and your walls are gripping him like a vise. “Baby you’re sucking him s’good, look at you.”
“Perfect, pretty little whore.” Sukuna agrees, Satoru’s pulling your hair now, yanking you off Sukuna, pulling you onto your knees and fucking up into you, you scream out, while Sukuna comes and smacks your face again, each cheek, sharply hurting. “Admit you like it.”
“Oh f-fuck off… I like Satoru better.” Sukuna’s eyebrows go low, canines showing as he grins, finger pressing against your clit, forcing you to cum again all over Satoru’s cock.
“Knew she liked m-me more. Saw her first.” Satoru kisses you now, licking up Sukuna’s precum right off your lips, as you register his words, weakly shaking, your body trying to register all the pleasure it’s given.
“Saw me first?” You mumble, but now Sukuna has pulled you off Satoru, bending you over the bed, your feet are just dangling his bed is so fucking tall, and now Satoru’s cock is back in your face, he’s brushing your hair back sweetly. “No… what do you mean saw me first.”
“I saw you first, Satoru’s just the one that had the idea before me.” Sukuna’s thwacking his heavy cock on your ass, groaning as he pulls your thighs apart, fingers trailing down the ropes of lights coming off your left thigh, wrapping it back on. “Look at your slutty cunt, so cock thirsty, beat up already”
“Your pussy is pretty.” Satoru says with a smile, gasping as your tongue runs back up his pretty cock. “Mmm, taste how sweet you are?”
“Bring her roses too, simp. Oh my… fuck never mind- ah- don’t… blame you… fuck…”
“Ah!” Your back arches as you let out a muffled cry.
Sukuna’s groaning as he sinks inside your eager cunt, luckily Satoru stretched you some, because taking him is too much, you’re bucking your hips damn near fleeing, he grunts and drags them back. “Oh don’t run, brat.”
“You can take him, baby.” Satoru’s shoving his cock back up inside your mouth now, and tears prick your eyes as he gags you, and Sukuna’s sliding his cock even deeper, burning and stretching your skin.
“Your cunt is perfect. Fuck you’re not leaving.”
“Excuse-ah!” You go to say something, but Sukuna’s sinking even deeper, meanly bullying his way through your walls until he stuffs you so full, you’re screaming around Satoru’s length, Sukuna’s pressing your head down further, and Satoru is moaning and whimpering, cock twitching in your mouth.
“Oh, make her do it again, fuck… and I want her at my place.” You’re deep throating Satoru as Sukuna moves, and he fucks you hard, brutal, but it’s so goddamn good you can’t stand it. You’re whining as you look up at pretty blue eyes, feeling Satoru’s long fingers curl around your throat.
“Not a chance. Cunt is made for me.” Sukuna huffs, slamming you harder, pulling your hair and pulling you off Satoru, in some insane game they’re playing with you. Satoru taps your open mouth with his cock over and over, you whine out as his tip is rubbing your spot, making you see stars. “Oh she’s close again, ha!” He slams his cock so deep you feel like you’re split apart.
“You’re too rough with her. Tell him you like me more.” Sukuna fucks into you now, hammering his cock so fast you scream, unable to do anything but drool, dazed and stupid. “Sukuna let her talk.”
“Need to cum inside her, fuck, brat has the best pussy.”
“N-not a brat.” You manage to whisper, they both laugh at your attempt.
“She’s so cute, ugh.” Satoru pinches your cheeks now, before you know it Satoru is on his back and you’re riding him, or trying to, he’s so monstrous you’re basically shaking and trying to fuck half his cock, as Sukuna’s behind you, slipping two fingers up your little ass hole, you start gushing and throbbing around Satoru’s cock.
“Get the lights off me.” You mumble weakly, and they both ignore you, your hands are braced on Satoru’s chest, he looks at you with lust filled blue eyes, biting his full lower lip and pressing his fingers into your pelvis, when Sukuna picks you up, shoving his cock in your pussy instead, slamming into you, before putting you back on Satoru’s cock again.
Sukuna’s hand wraps back around your throat as you ride Satoru’s cock weakly, Satoru’s hitting that spot so deep, you’re hoarsely crying out now, shaking as you cling to both of them. “Can you take us both at once?”
“No way.”
“In the ass-”
“No way!” Satoru pouts up at you.
“Baby I wanna fuck your ass so bad though.”
“Uh-uh. And certainly not you.” You scowl back at Sukuna, who tightens his hand with a laugh.
“I’m cumming inside you first then.” Sukuna lifts you, they both are throwing you around like some little fucking rag doll, Satoru’s stroking his cock as Sukuna has you on your back, pressing your thighs up high, the ropes of the lights burning, you cry out, and he looks down at your tummy, grinning. “God look at you, fucked out little slut.”
You’re gasping when Sukuna leans low, his heavy weight on you as he slides your thighs so high, one over his shoulder, arch of your foot against his chest, making him so much deeper. You see the huge bulge move inside your tummy, making you heat up, cheeks furiously hot as you’re soaking his length.
“Can you take two loads baby?” Satoru asks, laying next to you now, jerking his cock, you weakly nod, earning his kiss, before Sukuna’s got your mouth again.
“Gonna fill you so full, gonna drip us for days, then fill you again. Slutty brat, want it huh?” You nod again, because you’re fucked too stupid to argue, and when Sukuna shoves so deep you’re cumming again, milking his cock for all his sticky white ropes of cum, drooling out of your hole now, down his cock. “Fuck… fuck… you…”
He kisses you, oddly sweet for pounding you full as you’re roped in Christmas lights, his santa hat falling to the side finally, pushing more and more cum inside you, exhaling and finally getting just a tiny bit less hard. You’re spasming, orgasm washing through your wrecked body and mind. Sukuna kisses down your neck, brushing your hair back and looking at you.
“Gonna knock you the fuck up, hah.” You gasp, eyes widening, making him grin like a psycho again.
“No, she’ll have my babies thank you.” Satoru’s on you next, shoving his cock inside you, you’re already dripping Sukuna’s cum as he does, it’s so filthy and nasty, the wet sounds Satoru’s cock makes, as he’s on top of you, and watching his own bulge in your tummy, now grinning like a psycho himself. “Oh fuck, feel me?”
“Everywhere.” You murmur weakly, because you do, and your words make him moan out, slamming your thighs up in a mating press, you’re folded in half as he fucks out Sukuna’s cum and yours.
“Gonna get his all out before I fill you with mine. I’ll cum even more. Fill you s’good pretty girl.” Satoru’s eyes are so bright blue it’s impossible to look at, but your own eyes are slamming shut as the nth orgasm hits, you’re covered in goosebumps as Sukuna watches you all, his cock still heavy and semi hard, in fact it’s getting hard again already.
You’re clinging to the sheets under you weakly, Satoru’s pumping his hips, you’re so wet your cunt greedily sucks him up, Satoru’s long fingers press deeply against your calves as he rails you, slowing finally, hips stuttering, you start feeling him thicken so deep. He’s grabbing your face with both hands now, whining into your mouth as he fills you full of cum.
Your second load pumped is even more cum than Sukuna, he’s stuttering his hips as he lets out breathy cries, you’re shaking as he shoves his cum so deep, against your cervix, pumping it more and more. You feel like you’re going to pass out when he’s finally done, you feel too full, feel it in your stomach, and soon Sukuna is on one side, Satoru on the other, untangling you.
They pull off the lights and are brushing their fingertips up and down your skin, covered in lines and forming bruises. Satoru’s gently kissing them, and Sukuna is humming with pleasure as he presses against the divots in your soft skin. You’re struggling to get a coherent thought to work in your fucked out brain when Sukuna stands now.
“Shower, brat?” He asks, and you exhale, nodding.
“Yeah but I can’t stand up.” You earn two big ass grins, Sukuna picks you up and carries you, Satoru’s firm ass is jiggling just a bit as he runs over to the bathroom, starting the hot spray.
“Weak and pathetic.” Sukuna says, with a tsk, you glare up at him again, as he takes off the santa hat that somehow stayed on your head, you have absolutely no clue how so. “But so fucking pretty like this.”
“So pretty.” Satoru turns you to him, kissing you deeply, you limply fall against him, body still shaking, cum dripping out from both of them, sticky on your thighs, you feel fucking boneless now. “I’ll wash your hair, sweets.”
“Mmhm.” Is all you manage, now the three of you are in the huge tiled stand up shower, Sukuna closes the glass, entrapping you all in the steamy hot spray, it beats down on your body, making your aches ease as the scalding water hits.
“And you’ll wash my hair, brat.” Sukuna says, you snort.
“You’re too tall.” He gets on his knees, Satoru’s cock is pressing on your back as he massages your scalp, kissing down your neck, and Sukuna is staring up at your bare cunt, all puffy from how much it’s been through. You gasp when he kisses it.
“Merry Christmas to me.” He murmurs, lapping at you again, Satoru is biting your neck and wrapping his arms around you.
“Our little present.” Satoru smacks little mwahs of kisses, big hands gripping your tits. “You’re so on the naughty list now.”
Sukuna laughs against you. “You’re an idiot, Satoru.”

Thank you all again for 3k, now I'm going to... take a shower after editing this.
#gojo x reader#sukuna x reader#jjk x reader#jujustu kaisen#jjk smut#gojo smut#sukuna smut#ryomen sukuna#satoru gojo#satoru x reader#satoru x you#sukuna x you#jjk men x reader#jjk men x you#jujustsu kaisen x reader#smutfest#gojo x you#gojo x y/n
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ೃ⁀➷ body electric ˗ˏˋ꒰ 🦢 ꒱
╰┈➤ suguru niragi x former!lover!reader imagine
a/n: i would like to give a special thank you to @lumillsie for the layout of this post and for the filter used on the header! please note that i do not agree with the choices of niragi and for any fanfictions i write about him, those controversial actions will be omitted!
˚ ༘♡ it was the strangest thing, stepping out of your bedroom and into a world that had ceased to exist. the familiar cadence of life, the hushed creaks of the old family estate, the distant sounds of the city beyond, had been swallowed whole by silence. you called out, expecting an answer, but none came. the lavish halls stretched empty, the doors left ajar as if abandoned in an instant. outside, the streets of tokyo stood frozen in time, emptied of their ceaseless crowds, their neon-lit chaos. no cars idling at intersections, no distant murmur of conversation, no footsteps beyond your own.
˚ ༘♡ for hours, you wandered, a lone figure adrift in a dead city. the absence of life gnawed at your mind, an eerie stillness pressing against your skin. you searched for movement, for any sign that you weren’t the last person left in the world. then, at long last, you found them, a handful of strangers clustered in the remains of a building complex, their faces etched with the same confusion and fear that pained your expression. pitiful consolation burned in your chest, only to be doused by frustration. they knew nothing. no one did.
˚ ༘♡ then came the notification, it read the following, “visa: 3 days remaining.”
˚ ༘♡ your heart pounded as you turned to one of the others, demanding to know what it meant. their answer was worse than anything your mind had conjured. you had three days to play. three days to win. fail, or refuse, and your visa would expire. and when that happened, you would die.
˚ ༘♡ it sounded absurd, a nightmare spun from exhaustion and fear. but then the first game began.
˚ ༘♡ a siren wailed through the building, red emergency lights casting the halls in an unnatural glow. a door slammed open. and then he appeared.
˚ ༘♡ a towering figure draped in dark clothing, a horse mask concealing his face, the gleam of a gun heavy in his hands. he did not hesitate. the first shot rang out, cutting through the confusion, splattering blood across the walls. screams shattered the air. chaos erupted, bodies scrambling for cover as the game of tag began, except this wasn’t a game. not really.
˚ ༘♡ you ran. every breath burned, every heartbeat a countdown to death. the masked man moved with terrifying precision, his steps unhurried, methodical. you turned a corner just as another shot rang out through the air, a body hitting the ground behind you. fear coursed through your veins like fire, but survival drove you forward.
˚ ༘♡ in the end, you lived, not by skill, not by strength, but by sheer luck. a young man and a woman, moving like they had done this before, found the safe zone in the final moments. you barely made it, collapsing against the wall, lungs heaving, the taste of fear still thick in your throat. the masked man vanished. the sirens cut off. eerie silence returned.
˚ ༘♡ your phone buzzed again. your visa had been extended.
˚ ༘♡ the next day, you could hardly move. fatigue and shock weighed you down, pinning you to the cold floor of the abandoned building you had taken refuge in. your mind refused to process what had happened, but deep down, you knew. if you didn’t move, if you didn’t act, you wouldn’t survive the next game.
˚ ༘♡ it was pure chance that you ran into them again, the two who had saved you. the young man introduced himself as ryohei arisu, the woman as yuzuha usagi. you thanked them, though words felt meaningless after what you had just endured. when they asked if you wanted to join them, you didn’t hesitate.
˚ ༘♡ arisu mentioned a location called the beach, a rumored sanctuary where players had gathered. a sliver of hope in a city that had become a graveyard.
˚ ༘♡ it took time, careful observation, and calculated risk, but after following a group of players you recognized from the game of tag, you knew you were close, but without warning a devastating blow was delivered to the back of your head and you were entrenched by darkness.
˚ ༘♡ when you woke, your wrists were bound, the scent of lavender incense thick in the air. a lavish room stretched before you, unfamiliar faces standing in the dim light. a man entered, draped in a loose robe, his presence far too casual for the circumstances. he grinned and extended his arms in a welcoming gesture, “i am sure you all have questions, and we have the answers you are searching for.”
˚ ༘♡ the robed man, who introduced himself as the hatter, was the self-proclaimed ruler of the beach. with a charismatic grin, he explained the laws that governed this facade of a sanctuary, his voice smooth, practically hypnotic, as if he had rehearsed it countless times before.
˚ ༘♡ one. all playing cards collected from the games belonged to the beach. they believed that obtaining a full deck would grant them passage back to the original world, though there was no proof, only blind faith and desperation. two. all members were to follow the will of the leader, the hatter himself, and his chosen executive members. their word was law. questioning it was not an option. three. the most sinister of all, betray the beach, and you will be executed without mercy.
˚ ༘♡ his delivery was casual and lighthearted, but the dread of those mandates settled akin to lead in your stomach. there was no room for dissent. you were not being invited, you were being conscripted.
˚ ༘♡ with no choice but to comply, you were ushered away, given a simple command: change into swimsuits. no exceptions. it was a method of control, a way to ensure no weapons could be concealed. but beyond that, it was humiliating. a stripping away of your identity, reducing you to just another body in the beach’s twisted paradise.
˚ ༘♡ you were led into a grand dressing room, its gilded mirrors and velvet benches a stark contrast to the world outside. racks of swimwear lined the walls, bright, revealing, designed for spectacle rather than function. hesitant, you sifted through the options before settling on a pearl-white one-piece with a sweetheart neckline, elegant yet understated. even so, the thought of baring yourself in such a vulnerable space made you uneasy. for a sliver of modesty, you grabbed a sheer cover-up, draping it over your shoulders before stepping out into the heart of the resort.
˚ ༘♡ and what you saw left you speechless.
˚ ༘♡ the beach was alive with indulgence. men and women in vibrant bikinis and neon swim trunks danced freely, their bodies moving under the golden glow of the sun. cocktails sloshed in their hands, music pulsed from unseen speakers, laughter rang out like the city had never vanished. it was surreal, a fever dream of excess set against the backdrop of an abandoned world.
˚ ༘♡ but beneath the revelry, there was something off. something calculated.
˚ ༘♡ as you moved through the crowd, you felt it, the leering gazes of men trailing after you, drinking you in like you were just another prize in this lawless haven. your grip tightened around your cover-up, pulling it closer, shielding yourself as best as you could without drawing attention. searching the crowd, you finally spotted familiar faces, usagi and arisu, standing off to the side, their expressions indistinct.
˚ ༘♡ relief rushed through you as you hurried over. “i thought i’d never be able to find you two.”
˚ ༘♡ usagi glanced up, her eyes taking you in. she wore a navy blue two-piece, a peach zip-up jacket pulled tightly around her frame despite the heat. her voice was low, almost conspiratorial as she muttered, “can you believe they’re making everyone dress like this? it’s humiliating.”
˚ ༘♡ arisu, arms crossed, let out a slow breath, gaze drifting toward the endless stretch of blue sky. “you think what the executives said is true?” his voice was laced with doubt. “that if we gather all the cards, we can go back?”
˚ ༘♡ neither you nor usagi answered. because what was there to say? it was a fool’s hope, a dangling promise intended to keep the beach running, to keep its members playing the games. no one knew if escape was even possible. and something told you that the people in charge of these depraved, debauched games didn’t care.
˚ ༘♡ the vivacious laughter and excitement that had consumed the resort mere moments ago began to wane, like a tide pulling back, exposing something far more menacing beneath the surface. you felt it before you saw it, a change in the air, an unspoken tension that rippled through the crowd, silencing the drunken revelry. turning your head, your breath became erratic.
˚ ༘♡ a group of men strode through the party, their presence suffocating, the very energy of the beach seeming to warp around them. at the front of the pack, you recognized him immediately, the man who had taken down the tagger during your first game. his presence had unnerved you then, and it unnerved you now. he moved with the quiet confidence of a predator, his muscled frame tense beneath his tank top, his sharp eyes scanning the crowd with indifference. he looked like a member of the yakuza with his shaved head and vicious attitude.
˚ ༘♡ yet, it was the figure behind him that truly sent a chill down your spine. a man dressed in black, his hood drawn up over his head, a long, gleaming blade clutched in his grip. his head was shaved clean, but tattoos inked his stark white skin, crawling down his neck like a web of curses. he didn’t speak. he didn’t need to. his very presence was suffocating, a walking omen of violence.
˚ ༘♡ your gaze steadily drifted to the figure on the left, and your entire body locked up.
˚ ༘♡ no.
˚ ༘♡ your heart lurched, your stomach twisting into knots so tight you felt nauseous. your breath caught in your throat, your knees going weak beneath you. your mind screamed at you that it couldn’t be, that it shouldn’t be. but it was.
˚ ༘♡ “hey, aguni, who is this jerk staring at you?”
˚ ༘♡ the masculine voice with a taunting edge, slashed through the unbearable silence, your gaze landed on him. niragi.
˚ ༘♡ he stood before you, a rifle slung casually over his shoulder, his smirk razor-sharp and laced with cruelty. but your eyes weren’t on the weapon. they weren’t even on the piercings that now lined his eyebrow and tongue, nor the unruly strands of black hair that had grown out since you last saw him.
˚ ༘♡ the same eyes that once held warmth, shyness, devotion. the same eyes that once looked at you like you were his entire world. but now? now they were malicious and dark, devoid of anything kind and compassionate. the cocky bravado was there, the smirk, the teasing edge to his voice. but for a fleeting second, just a fraction of a second, his mask slipped. his expression faltered. he recognized you. he wasn’t expecting this, he wasn’t expecting you.
˚ ༘♡ arisu, beside you, blinked in surprise. “you’re the guy from the game of tag.”
˚ ༘♡ aguni, the man leading the group, barely spared you a glance. instead, his gaze flickered over the three of you, his lips curling in something that wasn’t quite a sneer, wasn’t quite pity. “i see your friend died.” his tone was cold, impersonal. “what a shame. the weak ones survived.”
˚ ༘♡ niragi, however, was no longer looking at arisu or aguni. his full attention was on you. his fingers twitched at his side, his head tilting slightly, like he was trying to piece together if this was real or some bizarre hallucination. then, before you could even think of what to say, he took a step forward, closing the distance between you just enough to make your breath catch in your throat.
˚ ༘♡ ”it’s been a while, honey.”
˚ ༘♡ his voice was laced with mockery, with that menacing brutality, but there was something else too, something genuine. a sliver of sincerity buried beneath it all, a trace of something that made your heart ache, remnants of the niragi you once cherished so deeply.
˚ ༘♡ “why are you hanging out with this loser?” niragi seethed, his voice ridden with contempt as his glare locked onto arisu. before arisu could even process the insult, let alone defend himself, niragi swung the end of his rifle into his face with a sickening crack. the impact sent arisu crashing onto the cold, tiled floor, his head snapping back against the hard surface.
˚ ༘♡ blood gushed from his nose and mouth almost instantly, painting the shining white tiles in deep crimson. he barely had a chance to react before niragi loomed over him, lifting his boot and slamming it into his ribs. arisu curled inward, gasping in pain, but niragi wasn’t done. he kicked him again, this time in the head.
˚ ༘♡ usagi let out a panicked cry and dropped to the ground beside arisu, her hands flying up to shield him. “stop! please!” she shouted, desperation cracking her voice. she tried to shove niragi away, but he barely stumbled. without hesitation, he turned and shoved her back with enough force to send her sprawling across the floor.
˚ ༘♡ “what the hell are you doing?” you snapped, horror and disbelief flooding your veins. your mind reeled, unable to make sense of what you were seeing, of the man standing before you. niragi had once been the one suffering under the weight of cruelty, bullied relentlessly until he had nearly been broken. you had been the one to step in, to defend him, to pull him from the insults and beatings of others. and now, here he was, standing in the shoes of the very monsters who had tormented him.
˚ ༘♡ what happened to him?
˚ ༘♡ “niragi, enough! no more!” you yelled out, but he ignored you, lifting his boot again as if he had already decided arisu’s fate.
˚ ༘♡ you didn’t think. you acted. you threw yourself in front of him, your body a barrier between niragi and the bloodied mess of arisu curled up on the floor. usagi was already huddled beside him, shielding him as best as she could. you could see niragi’s rise and fall as adrenaline coursed through his veins, feel his eyes boring into you, but you didn’t care.
˚ ༘♡ “what have you become?” you shouted, your voice shaking, your emotions threatening to swallow you whole. “have you lost your mind because of these games? is this who you are now?”
˚ ༘♡ niragi stood motionless, his expression darkening. for a minute, something unreadable glistened in his gaze, something vanishing, something buried beneath layers of cruelty and indifference. then, his lips coiled into a sneer.
˚ ༘♡ “what have i become?” he mocked, his tone laced with amusement. “why are you being so melodramatic?”
˚ ༘♡ your heart pounded as you looked past him, at the men standing behind him, watching without saying a word. this was for them. niragi wasn’t just acting out of anger, he was performing, playing the role expected of him, preserving whatever foreboding image he had built here.
˚ ༘♡ he exhaled sharply and tilted his head, his smirk growing. “get out of my way, would you?” his voice was almost teasing, but there was a dangerous edge beneath it. he reached out, fingers brushing against your cheek in a touch that once would have made you feel more beloved than any woman in the world. but now? now, it was no different than the most potent of venom.
˚ ༘♡ your grimaced with revulsion, and before he could even register it, you jerked away, stepping back like his touch had burned you. niragi chuckled, shaking his head. “come on, don’t be like that,” he mused. “i promise we’ll have all the time in the world to catch up, after i finish with these two.”
˚ ༘♡ he moved to step around you, his patience wearing thin, but you blocked him again. this time, your stance was firmer, your hands clenching into fists at your sides, your fingernails digging into the skin of your palms. you could feel your pulse pounding in your throat, but you forced yourself to meet his gaze, unflinching.
˚ ༘♡ “niragi, please.”
˚ ༘♡ his name left your lips softer this time, stripped of the anger, stripped of the disbelief. it was a plea, not simply for arisu’s sake but for his, for the young man you once knew, the one you once loved.
˚ ༘♡ niragi hesitated. for a short while, something in his expression changed. you held his gaze, hoping, praying, that somewhere beneath the layers of cruelty and violence, he still remembered, those late-night phone calls, the way he used to look at you when he thought you weren’t watching, the warmth of his fingers laced through yours on lazy afternoons at the café. if there was anything left of that niragi, maybe, just maybe, he would stop.
˚ ༘♡ his smirk twitched, his tongue flicking over the silver piercing on his lip. then, with a lazy wave of his hand, he scoffed. “eh, whatever,” he muttered, swinging his rifle back over his shoulder as if nothing had happened. “this is no fun with you whining in my ear.” he turned away without another glance, striding off like he had already forgotten all about you. the rest of the men followed, their presence dissipating as quickly as it had arrived. aguni lingered for a tad longer, his expression obscured and harsh, before he, too, disappeared into his horde of followers.
˚ ༘♡ you stood bewildered, the tension in your body unraveling all at once, leaving only nausea in its wake. the atmosphere still buzzed with energy from the resort party, but it all felt so far away, like a different world entirely. your mind returned to arisu and usagi, they required your help.
˚ ༘♡ you spun on your heel and dropped to your knees beside him. he was still on the floor, barely conscious, his face drained of color, his body limp. usagi knelt beside him, pressing her zip-up jacket against his forehead to slow the bleeding. the fabric was already stained deep red.
˚ ༘♡ panic surged through you. you reached out, brushing arisu’s shoulder tenderly, trying to ground yourself as much as him. “i’ll get help, okay? stay here.”
˚ ༘♡ usagi nodded, her jaw tight, her focus entirely on arisu. you pushed yourself to your feet, your heart hammering as you turned and ran. you didn’t know where you were going. you didn’t even know who you could turn to in a place like this. but you had to hurry. arisu was losing too much blood, his life was in danger, because of niragi.
˚ ༘♡ your mind still couldn’t fully grasp it, the sheer impossibility of what he had become. your sweet and loving boyfriend you once knew was gone, replaced by a man who could smile through savagery, who could beat someone half to death and consider it entertainment.
˚ ༘♡ niragi was gone. whatever had taken his place, you weren’t sure you wanted to understand.
a/n: my first alice in borderland fanfiction! if you have any thoughts or requests, please let me know! 🤍
#alice in borderland#aib#niragi alice in borderland#alice in borderland fanfic#alice in borderland fanfiction#alice in borderland fic#aib x reader#aib niragi#suguru niragi#niragi suguru#niragi x reader#niragi fanfiction#niragi fanfic#the hatter#chishiya alice in borderland#arisu#ryohei arisu#niragi x female reader#niragi x you#niragi x y/n#alice in borderland x reader#suguru niragi fanfiction#suguru niragi fanfic#mira kano#keiichi kuzuryu#kuzuryu#usagi#kuina#aguni#aguni morizono
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not sure if youve done something like this before or if its too suggestive but maybe the reader is a little nervous to be intimate because she’s inexperienced or has never had a bf before? with isagi or anyone tbh
“𝐟𝐢𝐫𝐬𝐭 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐨𝐧𝐥𝐲”

a/n: header image had everything to do with this post
definitely suggestive!
ft. isagi yoichi, itoshi rin, nagi seishiro, mikage reo, itoshi sae, shidou ryusei, kaiser michael, ness alexis, karasu tabito, yukimiya kenyu
isagi yoichi
he immediately notices you're nervous and his tone softens right away.
he’s super patient, like, won’t even kiss you unless you give the tiniest nod of approval.
“we don’t have to rush anything, okay? i just like being near you.”
isagi would totally ask you what you're comfortable with, hands twitching a little at his sides because he also gets flustered when it’s serious.
if you mention that you’ve never had a boyfriend before, he gets wide-eyed and a little red.
“then… i’ll make sure your first is really good. not just like… that! i mean, like, relationship stuff!!” he panics and waves his hands around.
he’s such a sweetie though, will always check in with you and hype you up like, “you’re perfect, you know that?”
itoshi rin
stoic exterior but the moment you say you’re nervous or new to this, he blinks.
“... that’s fine.” he says it so matter-of-factly, like it’s not a big deal at all.
but inside? heart doing backflips because you trust him enough to say that.
he’ll adjust instantly, pulls away a little, gives you space, his touches turn featherlight.
he won’t tease. instead, he mumbles a quiet, “you can take your time with me.”
might shyly lace your fingers together and just stay like that for a while.
he respects your boundaries to a T, but lowkey gets a little possessive like, “you’ve never had a boyfriend before? then i’ll be the only one.” (he’s dead serious btw.)
nagi seishiro
when you admit you’ve never had a boyfriend, he tilts his head like, “huh… really?”
not because he thinks it’s weird, but because he genuinely can’t believe someone as cute as you hasn’t had one before.
he goes, “guess i’m your first then. sounds kinda nice,” with a lazy grin.
he’s surprisingly gentle. like he’ll curl his arm around you when you’re nervous and go, “you don’t have to do anything you don’t wanna, okay?”
nagi’s love language becomes being near you ��� long hugs, head resting on your shoulder, casual hand holding.
if you flinch or hesitate, he pauses and mumbles, “sorry… too fast?”
then just flops next to you and opens a game. “wanna watch me play instead?” it’s his way of saying he’s happy just being with you.
mikage reo
reo is so smooth but the moment you confess you're inexperienced, his face softens completely.
“oh… hey, that’s totally okay. i’ll take care of you,” he says with the gentlest smile.
he's a natural flirt, but he dials it back for you. goes from flirty to full-on boyfriend mode.
“you don’t have to impress me, y’know. i already like you just the way you are.”
if you’re nervous about kissing, he literally whispers “can i kiss you?” like it’s sacred.
he spoils you with reassurance: “you’re doing great,” “you’re cute when you’re shy,” “i feel lucky to be your first.”
will not shut up about how honored he is to be your first boyfriend. texts you “first bf privileges 😛” as a joke but is lowkey whipped.
itoshi sae
he raises an eyebrow when you tell him, like, “never had a boyfriend? huh.”
then gets this smug, slow smirk. “guess you’ve got good taste now.”
but then he sees how genuinely anxious you look and his tone shifts immediately.
“hey. it’s okay. i’m not going to rush you. ever.”
he’s really good at reading your body language. if you tense even a little, he backs off with zero complaints.
instead of being touchy, he becomes comforting, like letting you wear his hoodie, brushing hair behind your ear, soft glances.
if you ever cry or feel embarrassed, he’ll literally hold you and mumble into your ear: “don’t be ashamed of that. i’ll go slow. you don’t have to be perfect with me. just be you.”
shidou ryusei
when you say you’ve never had a boyfriend, he blinks.
“you’re tellin’ me no one’s ever hit that?” cue your face going red.
he laughs when you get flustered, but his tone changes quick once he realizes you're actually nervous.
“okay, okay, sorry. i’ll behave. promise.”
he genuinely tries to dial it down, even if it kills him to not be all over you.
surprisingly good at physical comfort. throws an arm around you lazily and lets you hide your face in his hoodie.
whispers stuff like, “you’re cute when you’re shy,” and then immediately goes, “wait, sorry, was that too much?”
lowkey proud to be your first. wanted to ruin everyone else’s chances from the start.
kaiser michael
“you’ve never had a boyfriend?” he says with that signature smirk, but something soft flickers in his eyes.
he gets cocky for a second: “figures. you’ve got high standards.”
but then his expression shifts, and he actually looks… serious.
“i won’t mess this up,” he says, more to himself than you.
kaiser can sense hesitation in a heartbeat. he reads you like a book (well he does read psychology books).
instead of teasing, he leans in and says, “tell me what makes you comfortable. i’m listening.”
runs a hand down your arm slowly, like he’s testing the waters, and waits for your reaction.
terrifyingly good at making you feel like the only girl in the world, but also shockingly gentle when it counts.
ness alexis
he freezes the moment you confess you're nervous about intimacy.
“oh… oh no, did i do something wrong? i didn’t mean to rush anything!”
poor baby panics a bit, apologizing and waving his hands around.
once you explain, he calms down and becomes the sweetest boy ever.
“thank you for trusting me with that,” he says with a pink blush on his cheeks.
he’s super respectful and extra careful after that, asks before everything, even hand-holding.
will write you little notes like “you make my heart beat really fast” and leave them in your bag.
he's just so honored to be your first that he treats the relationship like it’s the most precious thing ever (because to him, it is).
karasu tabito
“wait… seriously?” he raises a brow, not mocking, just surprised.
then he leans back with a teasing grin: “guess that means i get to corrupt you, huh?”
you smack his arm, and he laughs, but quickly softens when he sees you're actually nervous.
“hey… i’m kidding. mostly.” he nudges your shoulder. “you don’t gotta prove anything to me.”
he’s smooth, but chill. sits with you on the floor, back-to-back, talking about random things until you’re comfortable.
if you get shy, he shifts into “calm big brother best friend energy” mode and jokes around to make you laugh.
but then he’ll randomly drop a line like, “y’know, it’s kinda cute being your first. i’ll make it worth it.”
yukimiya kenyu
his first instinct is to reassure you.
“thank you for telling me. i’ll make sure to be extra mindful of how you feel.”
he’s the kind of guy to ask permission before leaning in or even brushing your hair behind your ear.
yukimiya is elegant with his words: “i don’t want to rush something so important. you deserve tenderness, not pressure.”
the type to take your hand gently and rest it over his heart so you can feel how fast it’s beating, too.
absolutely adores the fact he gets to be your first, but never brags about it.
just smiles to himself like he’s memorizing the moment, tucks a piece of your hair behind your ear and murmurs, “you’re doing so well. i hope you know how beautiful you are.”
© 𝐤𝐱𝐬𝐚𝐠𝐢
#blue lock#blue lock x reader#bllk#bllk x reader#blue lock headcanons#isagi yoichi x reader#yoichi isagi x reader#rin itoshi x reader#itoshi rin x reader#itoshi sae x reader#sae itoshi x reader#nagi seishiro x reader#seishiro nagi x reader#michael kaiser x reader#kaiser michael x reader#ness alexis x reader#alexis ness x reader#karasu tabito x reader#tabito karasu x reader#shidou ryusei x reader#ryusei shidou x reader#yukimiya kenyu x reader#kenyu yukimiya x reader#first and only
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Claiming - Max Verstappen (Dark Fic)
Words: 2,231 Summary: In a world where F1 drivers can claim someone as a wife while at a race, here is Max’s version. Note(s): DARK FIC, NSFW. Reader is essentially kidnapped. I’d like to thank lovey on Ko-fi for commissioning this. I had a lot of fun writing this and oh boy did it take a turn I wasn’t expecting. Takes place in 2023. Also, once again thank you to 🦢 anon for this idea and all your thoughts! Claiming wouldn’t be a thing without you.
Charles’ Version
Masterlist | Support Me!
Since a month ago the emotion she’s felt most is confusion. From the moment a security guard and an FIA official escorted her from the grandstands to the Red Bull garage, to Max Verstappen’s drivers room. From him gently grabbing her hand and kissing the back of it, to the conference room where the FIA official explained things to her and god, she felt like she had only heard every three words, to now.
Max is the source of all her confusion, because he is confusing. He’s aggressive and dominant on track. So clearly hates press and events he’s forced to go to. If he likes you, he likes to make you laugh and make sure you’re happy. He’s attentive in a way she didn’t know was possible.
As soon as they were in Monaco after the race, after he claimed her, and she fiddles with the heavy diamond ring on her finger at the thought, he had taken her to the grocery store, claiming that his fridge and pantry were empty since he’d just come home from a triple header. She hadn’t realized then but as they walked through the grocery store he had watched her closely. Watched what shelves she paused at, what brands and items she put in the cart versus the ones she made small faces at. Making a note of them all.
It wasn’t until a few days later when someone came by to drop off groceries and she saw all that all the groceries were things and brands she likes that she started to realized that it’s quietness in the grocery store, him following behind her, hadn’t been him giving her a bit of space, some grace, but rather him making notes of what she likes.
She’s unable to hide anything from him, which is even more confusing, because he doesn’t know her. Had chosen her seemingly on a whim. When she was told why she got taken his driver’s room by the FIA official, she had thought it was some sort of prank, a joke, but as three different binders had been laid out in front of her and proof of everything had been shown to her, had proved that she had been claimed, that she was now married to Max Verstappen the odd, weird, confusing reality had sunk in.
She had honestly figured as she laid awake next to Max that night that she would be just kept at his place for quick relief. Asked to undress and roll or bend over whenever he needed a quick easy fuck along with someone to keep his place clean and cooked meals in the fridge. She hadn’t expected for him to not even touch her like that.
He did however like to look at her like that. Eyes darkening, just a little narrowed as his jaw would sometimes twitch, deep breaths through his nose. But he never touched her like that which made her more confused because he did touch her.
He kissed her hand in greeting, put his hand on her lower back, would sling an arm around her waist, put his arm over her shoulders. He’d make their legs intertwine in bed or practically blanket her with his body when he didn’t have her cuddling into him, head resting on his t-shirt covered chest. Max hadn’t even tried kissing her on the lips despite clearly wanting to with the way he would sometimes stare at them as she talked.
Max Verstappen is confusing.
—
Max knows that he was supposed to claim a wife much sooner than he did. He could have done so the day of his first win, when they pulled him aside and told him that he could. He knows that’s what they wanted. They wanted him to claim a wife, to calm down, to bring a little less negative press to the sport. Luckily it was up to him to decide and there was no way in fucking hell he was claiming a wife. He made that clear in his celebrations with the team and his private words to people about how the FIA could fuck off.
He was also lucky that Red Bull backed his decision. He was their first driver since Mark Webber to get to claim a wife, the youngest in the history of the sport. The FIA couldn’t pressure him into it or punish him for not claiming anyone yet, but they could try and flaunt options for him to choose from. And they did. They did every year at nearly every race until finally the start of the 2022 season happened and there was a number one on his car.
That didn’t mean they stopped during the 2022 season, it was just significantly less than before. And now in 2023, just a few races away from winning his third championship, they hadn’t bothered him at all. The end of Monza marked them never being able to bother him again, he thinks as he watches his wife look at the clothes he had delivered for her. His now three championship trophies somewhat framing her with how she stands in front of the large couch.
They were all in her sizes, some from brands that she already had clothes from and other’s from more luxury brands that he had to be familiar with. She liked the one a lot, her fingers kept going back to the two tops from there, rubbing the fabric. He’ll have to take her to their store after COTA, he muses. The heat in Qatar had been too much for his poor wife and it had even got the better of him.
“Do you like them?” He asks, wrapping his arms around her from behind, relishing in the sharp inhale she gives, the slight sped up breathing.
“I do. They are all really nice.”
He presses a kiss to the top of her head, making a note to not buy her anymore hoodies, or at least buy them for himself and wear them a few times. She had worn so many of his, he figured she’d want one or two of her own, but the hoodie was the only thing her eyes and fingers had not returned to. “Good. I have some jewelry coming for you tomorrow as well.”
“Oh, thank you, Max.”
“Of course, vrouw.” He smirks at the way her body shivers at the Dutch word for wife.
—
It’s been nearly three months since Monza, since Max claimed her, since she became his wife. Which means it’s been three months since the last time she got off, six months since she last had sex. The sex part she can deal with, but she doesn’t think she’s gone this long without masturbating since she learned what it was and started doing it. And it feels like it’s killing her.
Because Max… Max is handsome. She’s seen tweets and things about how Max is ugly and she can’t even begin to comprehend that. He has some of the bluest eyes she’s ever seen, a nice jaw just barely covered with facial hair, slightly pouty lips and god it kills her that she hasn’t kissed them yet, kissed the freckle that rests on his top left lip. He has broad shoulders, strong arms, large hands, fingers that make her thighs press together when they tap against her hips or press into her. And his thighs. Every time she sees them, whether it’s in shorts or boxers, she can feel herself clench around nothing.
Maybe he wouldn’t affect her so much if he didn’t so clearly want her back. But he does. His eyes more and more frequently watching her, want simmering in them. And he’s never been shy about his morning wood, but instead of tilting his hips away from her, scooting away, or just adjusting her so it’s not pressed against her, now he stays. Lets her choose to move away when she feels him against her.
She never moves away, not until they absolutely have to get up.
She’s reached her limit, however. She constantly feels turned on, a warmth always burning inside of her, sometimes getting stoked to burn a little hotter and she fears that if she doesn’t get off in the next few hours she will jump Max. It’s tempting to just get to it, just lay down and fuck herself quickly, but that won’t leave her satisfied. She needs more than one quick orgasm to satisfy herself and she’s in luck because Max is leaving the house, having been invited to a paddle match.
She accepts the kiss on the cheek he gives her, wishing him good luck and then waits by the front door for a few minutes before turning and nearly rushing to the bedroom. Her arms somehow get tangled in her tank top as she pulls it off and her fingers fumble with her pajama pants and underwear as she tries to push them down. It takes longer than she wants, but finally she’s undressed. There’s an urge to fall onto the bed, but she forces it away, forces herself to take a deep breath as she goes to their closet.
Going to one of her shoe boxes, she lifts the lid, breath shaky as her fingers touch the lace of a La Perla balconette. She had never spent more than seventy dollars on a bra before Max, had privately thought people who spent more than a hundred dollars on scraps of lace and fabric were crazy but as she feels this against her fingers, she understands why people spend so much.
Her fingers are surprisingly steady as she puts on the balconette and matching panties. As she looks at herself in the mirror, hands rubbing at the body, her breath catches. She looked good, hot even. The lace against her skin making her blood rush.
She’s nearly back into the bedroom when she spots the shirt that Max had been wearing to sleep in last night. It’s just barely hanging on the edge of the hamper, about to fall on the floor. Before she can stop herself, she snags it and throws it on, breathing in the familiar and nice smell of Max.
Laying on the bed, she runs her hands over her body, eyes fluttering shut as they go under her shirt. Her breath catches as they trail over her stomach, fingers pausing at the waistband of her panties before moving back. They trace over the lace details of her top, breath catching when the tips of her fingers catch on her pebbled nipples. Moaning as she twists and pulls at them lightly, thighs pressing together.
She continues to play with her breasts, enjoying the feel of them and the lace in her hands. Drawing moans and whines from herself as she squeezes them, pinching and twisting her nipples, grazing her nipples with the tip of her finger. She’s aching for more, her panties damp. Her dominant hand leaves her breast, fingers just about to slip into her panties and there’s a hand clamping around her wrist.
Her eyes fly open, a gasp leaving her. “Max.” Her other hand drops away from her breast.
His grip on her wrist tightens, eyes darker than she’s ever seen them. Her name comes out in a near growl.
Her tongue darts out, swiping across her bottom lip and Max’s eyes fall to them at the motion and she breaks. “Please. Max, please.”
“Please what?”
She takes a shaky breath, “Touch me, kiss me. Please, Max.”
It’s like she blinks and he’s on top of her, his hand no longer gripping her wrist but instead gripping at her hip as he kisses her. She moans at the roughness of it, not even noticing him adjusting her until he’s fully in between her legs, one of them hitched around his waist. She only notices when he grinds their hips together, the friction making her break the kiss, panting as her fingers rake over his back.
“Max. Please.”
“What vrouw? Am I not kissing you?” He presses a kiss to her neck, over the flutter of her pulse. “Touching you?” He rolls his hips into hers.
She throws her head back at the contact. “I want,” a whine leaves her as he dips his head, running his tongue over her still lace covered nipple. “Fuck, Max.”
His hand still gripping her at her hip tightens its hold and she hopes he leaves bruises. “What do you want?”
“I want,” She nearly loses her train of thought again when grinds into her again. “Want you to fuck me. Please, Max, want you so bad.”
He groans, head resting on her chest as he gives a slightly stuttered thrust.
The slight loss of control makes her moan, her other leg moving to wrap around him, encouraging him to grind against her. She wants him. She wants him to touch her everywhere, not leave a single place that hasn’t felt his touch. She wants to feel his breath against her lips, his teeth sinking into her skin. She wants the press of bruises as he holds her tighter than maybe he should. She wants him sinking into her over and over again even though she hasn’t felt it once yet. She wants and wants and she doesn’t think that doing this once, twice, a hundred, a thousand times, will satisfy that want.
#max verstappen imagine#max verstappen x reader#f1 imagine#f1 x reader#formula 1 imagine#formula 1 x reader#max verstappen dark fic#max verstappen smut#f1 dark fic#f1 smut#sins fics#claiming a wife : max#claiming a wife
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Stick it Out to the End


summary: michael is desperate to get into oxford's prestigious bullingdon club; unfortunately for him, they command him to do the impossible to gain admittance
pairing: michael gavey x bimbo!reader
warnings: mature/explicit, 18+ (minors dni!), no use of y/n, afab reader, bimbo reader, mentions of hazing but nothing horrible/extreme, virgin!michael, breast/nipple play, praise kink, piv sex, protected sex (wrap it b4 u tap it), oral sex (f receiving), consensual filming, dirty talk, cursing, what i hope is saltburn-esque humor, mild size kink, mild angst but happy ending, let me know if i missed anything!
word count: 12.7k
a/n: images in the header are for aesthetic purposes only & are not used to describe the reader! she's back and she's long as hell but what else is new!!! this is my first time writing bimbo!reader and while she wasn't super bimbo-y, it was fun getting my feet wet! hope y'all enjoy!
likes, comments, & reblogs are very appreciated but never required!
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Michael
Michael couldn’t help but feel his heart speed up in his chest as he wound through the quiet corridors clutching tightly to the cryptic note he’d found stuffed in his pigeonhole that morning – just a page torn out of a standard notebook covered hastily written red ink; wholly un-intimidating as far as cryptic notes were concerned. Really, he was surprised to see they didn’t put more effort in; with as secretive and imperious as this little club was, he had been expecting some sort of extravagant stationary, perhaps even some gold embossing.
Coming to a stop in front of an unassuming janitor’s closet door, he narrows his eyes behind the gold frames of his glasses, staring at the door with a nearly accusatorial expression. Michael swivels his head once more, his brows furrowed as he checks and re-checks every door in the vicinity before turning back to the one he stands before. Scoffing, he unfolds the note with a little irritated sigh and quickly scans the page again, mouthing the words to himself for the millionth time that day.
The riddle had been easy enough to figure out, some trivial little lines about dead men walking, the mob, finding God, and looking to one’s heart pointed right toward some hush hush basement beneath the Merton College Chapel. That, and it didn’t take a genius to see that each line consisted of a specific number of words, pointing him right to the very door he stood in front of now – 129.
Fucking amateurs, he’d thought after cracking the code in under half an hour. But that was earlier. And now, as he stares at the stupid dull grey janitor’s closet door in front of him, Michael can’t stop the little tendrils of doubt from creeping into his periphery. He’s sure this is the right door and positive this is the right place and yet… janitor’s closet. He checks his watch, 11:50 PM on the dot, and glances up and down the dark, shadowy corridors once more, half expecting one of the twatty rich assholes to jump out and start snickering at him, making fun of him for thinking that a no one like him would’ve ever received an invite to a club like this.
Shaking his head, he reaches for the doorknob anyway, he’s come this far so he may as well. He freezes a little when it actually turns and his blue eyes go wide when he pushes the door open, shivering a little as he’s met with a wall of cool, dank air – eau de basement, just as he’d expected. A little actually impressed sigh passes his lips when he pokes his head in, an apprehensive smile blooming on his lips as he takes in the eerie red lighting spilling up the stairwell from the God-knows-what downstairs.
He winces as the door squeaks when he tugs it open but he doesn’t stop, emboldened now as he knows he had been right once again. He takes the stairs quickly, probably too quickly given that he hasn’t a fucking clue what or who could be down here, but before he can dwell on the idea too much, he’s faced with another corridor. This one, unlike the ones upstairs, is narrow and brick-lined and leads in only one direction, straight to another closed door at the other end.
Michael squints against the bright red light coming from a spotlight that had been haphazardly set up on the stone floor and walks down the hallway, his steps speeding up as he hears the janitor’s door above him open and close once more. His breath hitches a little as he opens the second door and quickly steps inside, like ripping off a band-aid.
He freezes once more when a strong hand latches onto his shoulder and quickly jerks him further into the room, making him yelp as he stumbles, trying to keep pace with whoever the hell is leading him.
“What the –”
Before he has time to so much as blink, his back thuds against a brick wall and finally he looks up, the vicious scowl he’d prepared morphing into a look of disturbed confusion as he eyes a row of other students, about fifteen and all men from the looks of it, dawned with black –
Oh, Christ, are those ski masks? He thinks as he eyes them up and down, How fucking banal… at least it’s not hooded cloaks. He nearly rolls his eyes as he scans the rest of the room, taking in the dim lighting interspersed with blues and greens from more of those stupid party boy spotlights. Glancing to the side, he sees another boy in his year, some guy he only knew from a few classes and passing glances in the hallways, but even still he’s comforted to not be alone down here, no matter how cliché this whole affair seemed.
His blue eyes snap forward as the door, the only door, to the room is opened once more and some other poor sap is hastily dragged across the room, only to be smacked on the wall to his left. Again, it’s just some other boy Michael knows from classes, though he doesn’t know why he expects any different – it’s not as if he knows many people outside of the forced proximity of a lecture hall. Which was really his only reason for putting up with this bother, for seeking it out in the first place; a quick flash of him placing a tightly folded up sticky note with his name and pigeonhole number in an old, beaten up copy of King Lear in the library played in his mind – the price he seemed to pay for loneliness.
Distantly, the bells of the chapel began to chime, signaling the hour. Once, twice, and eventually twelve times – midnight. Time to start the show, Michael surmises.
“Welcome, initiates,” one of the hooded men says in a tone that makes Michael glare judgmentally, his voice pitched down like some idiotic knock-off Darth Vader. He steps forward from the row they stand in and holds his arms out open at his sides, “Consider this your first foray into the Bullingdon Club.”
Again, he has to bite the inside of his cheek to hold in a scoff. This was all just so… juvenile? He was beginning to sincerely doubt that this was the über clandestine club that granted its members all sorts of connections to various businesses, societies, and insider information that even the richest of the rich couldn’t buy.
Unfortunately, his face seemed to betray more of his emotions than he intended and the masked boy steps forward once more, his dark eyes zeroing in on Michael.
“You,” he says gruffly, pointing a finger in his direction, “Something you wanna say, initiate?”
Out of habit, he pushed his glasses up on his nose before he spoke, perhaps foolishly bold given the situation.
“Doesn’t this all seem a bit much for three people?” He scoffs, shaking his head slightly, “I mean, masks, really?”
The hooded boy stops for a second and studies Michael closely, one hand on his hip, “What’s wrong with the masks?”
“Well, what’s the point? There’s, what, fifteen or sixteen of you? And three of us?” He asks, glancing around the room, which he now realized very clearly used to be some run-of-the-mill storage room, probably forgotten about by now.
The boy laughs sarcastically and shrugs his shoulders a bit, his voice back to its natural pitch, “It wouldn’t really be a secret thing if we just invited half the student body, mate.”
Michael supposes his reasoning is sound and says as much with a little hum and nod of his head, eyebrows raising dismissively.
“Anything else?” The masked boy asks, crossing his arms over his chest.
“The masks don’t really disguise you lot that well,” he observes, pointing at one of the other boys standing in the row, “That’s Harry from Multivariable Calculus.”
“Shit…” Harry mutters under his breath, the sound carrying through the concrete room. A few of the other boys in the row lean over and place comforting hands on his shoulders and murmur words of encouragement, much to Michael’s dismay.
“Why’re you here, initiate?” The lead boy asks, turning back to Michael.
“Dunno,” he shrugs again, pushing his glasses up his nose, “Friends, I guess.”
A couple of the boys in the row make little noises, mutters of empathy that make the blond’s eyebrows furrow together in confusion as he glances up and down the line.
“And this was your first thought? A secret society?” Harry from Multivariable Calculus asks with a little laugh, “Not like… chess or something?”
“Don’t really like chess…” Michael says with a little shrug. Apparently a good enough answer for Harry, who makes a little noise of understanding and nods his head.
After another moment, the lead boy clears his throat, which shuts up the rest. “Anyway,” he says, his voice falsely low once more. “Each of you will be given a task…,” his dark eyes glance between Michael and the other two boys as he paces in front of them, “Perfectly customized to challenge you, to push you to your absolute limits.”
The masked boy pauses his little speech and gestures back to three of the other boys standing in the row behind him who then step forward and walk over to the dank brick wall that Michael and the other two boys stand against. He studies the boy that walks towards him carefully, his eyes narrowing in suspicion when he notices how much shorter he appears to be.
Finally, the boy comes to stand before him and presents a plain white envelope, though Michael’s lips spread into a hateful smirk when he sees an all too familiar pair of old, beat up trainers on the boy’s feet.
“Oliver?!” He hisses meanly, shock lacing his voice as he jerks back the hand he had reached out for the envelope, wincing as his elbow collides with the cool wall behind him. He glances around the room, noting the few pairs of eyes that were on him, before fixing his gaze on the boy before him once more with a harsh glare, “You’re in Bullingdon?”
The boy in front of him hesitates for a second, cutting a sideways glance toward a taller boy that was busy presenting an envelope to the boy to Michael’s left, before he sighs and looks back at him, blue eyes peeking out of the holes in his ski mask. “Yeah,” he huffs, shrugging his shoulders defensively, “How’d you know it was me, then?”
“You look like a goddamn twelve year old!” Michael jeers, his voice low and vicious as his hands curl into fists at his sides, “How’d you manage to get into this club anyway?” He questions, seething, “They only let you in if you have the money or the marks and I know for a fucking fact you don’t have either.”
Oliver sighs again and rolls his eyes, which makes him see red and grit his teeth, although he doesn’t miss how the shorter boy’s eyes cut to the side again quickly. He opens his mouth, but before he can get a word in edgewise, the blond cuts him off with a little mocking laugh.
“Don’t tell me that’s fucking Catton,” Michael groans lowly with a shake of his head, breathing heavily as he feels the same sense of anger and betrayal he’d felt all those months ago well up in him once more, transporting him right back to the stupid damn pub, “You’ve got to be bloody kidding me, is this shite little club only full of cunts?”
“Look, I’m –”
Oliver starts to speak again, only to be cut off when the head boy traipses over to where they are, coming to stand ominously behind him with his arms clasped behind his back. His dark eyes dart between the two boys before he speaks.
“Problem over here, lads?”
“No,” Oliver answers quickly, staring warily up at Michael as he practically shoves the envelope into his arms, “Just complete the task, initiate. You have thirty-six hours.”
Before Michael can blink, Oliver turns his back and stalks back over to the other boys, taking his place in the row once more. The head boy looks Michael up and down appraisingly before nodding to the letter in his hands with a sly smirk.
“I can’t wait to see how you fare with that one, Gavey,” he says, his voice low and threatening, as if he’s in on the most delicious joke, “Remember, thirty-six hours, initiate.” He chuckles softly and departs, returning to stand in the center of the room.
Everyone stands still for a moment, Michael and the other two boys to his left and right holding their respective envelopes nervously, unsure if they were supposed to open them now or not. Thankfully, the head boy clears his throat, commanding all eyes to him once again.
“Initiates,” he says slowly, his voice no doubt already hoarse from this little farce, “Failure to complete your tasks will result in a permanent ban from Bullingdon; no second chances. We expect results as well as proof of those results,” his dark eyes scan over the three boys once more, one corner of his mouth turned up into a mean smirk, “We’ll be seeing you back in this location Sunday at noon. Your thirty-six hours begin now… have fun.” He finishes with a taunting laugh before turning and exiting from the room, the old door creaking as he pulls it open before disappearing into the faint red glow of the hallway, followed by the rest of the fifteen boys in an orderly line.
As soon as the old door closes, the sound of paper tearing echoes around the dimly lit basement as Michael and the other two boys hastily tear open their envelopes. Pulling out a little slip of paper, his eyes go wide as a wave of dread washes over him. His eyes scan over the paper again and again as he nervously shoves his glasses back up his nose once more, silently willing the chicken-scratch words on the paper to somehow change, to give him some other command.
His heart is pumping so loudly in his ears that he misses it when one of the other boys tries getting his attention, his head snapping up suddenly as a hand waves in front of it.
“Oi!”
“W-What?”
“What did they give you?” The boy asks, nodding at the scrap of paper in Michael’s hand.
He clears his throat and tries his best to come off as casual, though he hardly cares with the way thoughts begin racing through his mind. “Oh, um,” he starts, glancing down to read over the paper once more, “I just uh, have to sleep with someone is all.”
The other two boys gape at him for a moment before groaning frustratedly. The one that had first spoken to him holds his paper out and smacks it disdainfully with the back of his hand.
“What the hell?” He asks gruffly, glancing between his paper and Michael, “Why’s yours so bloody easy?”
“For real,” sighs the second boy, rubbing the back of his head, “Ours are damn near impossible. They must already be decided on you to go so soft. How am I meant to steal the fucking Selden Map from Bodleian?” He laments, brows furrowed as he stares down at the paper in his hands.
“Yeah, and I have to transfer ten thousand pounds out of the chancellor’s bank account and into mine!” The first boy sighs, shaking his head, “At least your mum’s head of conservatorship here, you can at least get within a stone’s throw of the map. I have to commit fucking wire fraud!”
The two boys grumble for another moment as Michael silently descends into a tailspin, his blue eyes unfocused as he stares at one of the dingy brick walls of the basement, trying desperately to formulate a plan, any plan. He merely glances up as the other to head for the door, spitballing ideas for each of their tasks.
“Isn’t your dad the president of Julius Baer? Can’t you just get him to pull strings?”
“Oh, yeah, fantastic idea! I’ll just ring him and ask the old man to commit a felony! What could possibly go wrong there?”
Michael tries to tune out their bickering as the three of them ascend the staircase and trail out into the hallway of Merton College Chapel once more; the two other boys don’t pay him any mind as they continue whispering amongst themselves, their voices trailing quietly down the hallway as he leans with his back against the cool metal of the janitor’s closet door.
Sighing, he reads over the directive again, his blue eyes catching on the sharply scrawled letters of a very familiar name, one that makes his cheeks flush and his heart race. He swallows nervously, Adam’s apple bobbing in his throat.
How could they know to do this? He wonders sheepishly. It’s not like he’d mentioned her to anyone; hell, he’d never even said so much as three words to her! No, his pathetic little crush was entirely in his mind.
Too much of a coward to even say hi, he bemoans, trying to stave off the sense of shame he felt as he considered how many times he’d finished with her name on his lips, her pretty face and soft curves and sweet smell and little girly outfits whirling around his head since he’d spotted her on the first fucking day; he’d pined ever since and she didn’t even know he existed! How could she?
This is fucking impossible, he thinks miserably, wishing that he had any other task. He’d rather steal the Queen’s own goddamn family jewels than this. He glances at his watch once more and groans when he sees it’s almost already two in the morning; pushing himself up off the door, he hangs his head as he scurries back to his dorm room, thoughts spiraling as he plots.
You
A laugh bubbles up past your lips as you sway your hips, your whole body vibrating as “Umbrella” blasts through the speakers while you dance with your friends, partying to celebrate the end of term.
“You can run into my arms, it’s okay, don't be alarmed!” You sing happily, yours and your friends voices mingling together with another peal of laughter; you take another sip of your drink as you move along with the beat of the song, savoring the fizzy strawberry daiquiri as you begin to feel a bit warm from the little rush of alcohol, already on your third drink of the night.
You smile proudly as you spot Felix in the crowd, his hazel eyes already fixed on you, or well, fixated on your chest. His attention makes you preen and you bite your lower lip, the sickly sweet taste of your cherry lip gloss filling your mouth as you purposefully bounce up and down on the balls of your feet.
The thin straps of your pastel pink dress hold on for dear life as your chest heaves enticingly, and you giggle when you see those hazel eyes widen just a bit, no doubt tracing over the glittering chain of your necklace, following down to where it settles, a little sparkly pink diamond nestling temptingly at your cleavage. You teasingly wink, blushing a little when you get a wink back, and go back to dancing with your friends, knowing from experience that Felix preferred to approach rather than be approached.
You dance with your friends for a few more moments, grinding up against any warm body you can find as a raunchier song begins pumping through the speakers, before you feel eyes on you yet again. Smiling at the attention, you glance around again, the low, colorful lighting of the pub making it hard to tell exactly which direction your admirer’s coming from.
Your eyes flit over a few familiar faces, you can’t help but sigh in relief when you notice that Oliver’s eyes are thankfully planted firmly on someone that is not you, though a confused little crease forms between your brows when you realize that Felix’s aren’t either. Turning your head, you sway along to the music still as you look around quickly, your feet beginning to ache finally from the precious little satin Chanel heels buckled around your ankles.
Your eyes finally lock onto an unexpected gaze, a fresh wash of pink coloring your cheeks as blue eyes glance shyly away from you. A little giggle titters past your lips as you lean over to one of your friends, patting her shoulder to get her attention.
“You know who that blond guy is? With the glasses?” You call over the music, nodding over in your admirer’s direction as he stands awkwardly back against the wall by the entrance, clutching a still-foamy pint.
She glances over before turning back to you with a little shrug. “Michael something, I think!” She says, her breath warm as she leans in closer so you can hear her, “I thought Oliver knew him!”
Your eyes immediately find the brunette, predictably following Felix around like a lost little puppy, before you look back over at Michael. You can’t help but feel a bit bad when you see him quickly look away from your direction again before staring intently into his pint glass, one hand shoved in the pocket of his khaki pants.
“I’m gonna take a breather for a second!” You yell over the loud music, leaning in close and cupping a hand over her ear.
“Aw, babe, come on!” She pouts playfully, tilting her head at you, “Stay longer!”
You shake your head with another little laugh and gesture at your feet, “These are sooo cute but they’re killing me!” You laugh, finishing off the last sip of your drink, “I’ll be over by the notice board!” You tell her, blowing a kiss as you walk away from the dance floor of the small, cramped pub.
Finally, you reach the little area by the front door and lean back against the wall, taking in a much-needed deep breath as you pull your little tube of lip gloss out of your bra and carefully reapply some more, smirking when you glance over out of the corner of your eye and see a certain blond boy already shyly eyeing you.
Rubbing your lips together with a little pouty pop, you tuck your gloss back in your bra once more before slowly approaching Michael, prettily manicured hands clasped behind your back to help shamelessly push your chest out more. His wide eyed stare makes you giggle and blush as you study him, eyes flitting appreciatively up and down his lithe frame; so much potential hidden away under a little button down and khakis.
“Haven’t seen you here before,” you tease, smirking when he blushes and all but chokes on his beer, coughing for a few seconds before finally speaking.
“I… Me?” He asks awkwardly, glancing around for seemingly anyone else you could be talking to.
Lucky for him, you find his awkwardness endearing. Truthfully, you had for months, never missing the way his eyes always happened upon you in a crowd. There was something impressive about the boy, something that had made your mind drift to him on more than one occasion, even if you were already under someone else.
“Of course you, silly,” you laugh softly, leaning against the wall next to him and tilting your head curiously, “You’re Michael, right?”
His eyes go wide again and nods wordlessly before finding his voice. “Yeah, Michael,” he says with a reserved little smile, “Gavey! Michael Gavey…” He adds awkwardly, cheeks flushing even more when you giggle, seemingly charmed by his inability to string two words together. He nods as you introduce yourself.
“I know,” he says before blinking, eyes going wide behind his gold framed glasses as he awkwardly glances away, “I just… I mean I’ve heard your name before, that’s all.”
“That’s all, huh?” You echo with a flirty little giggle, twirling a lock of hair around your finger as you let the moment linger, just wanting to push him a little. “What’re you reading?” You ask curiously, cocking your head to the side a little.
“Maths,” he nods quickly before looking down into his pint glass once more as if fizzling beer is the most interesting thing in the world, “I don’t really like it all that much, though… I mostly only picked it because I’m good at it.”
“Ooh,” you coo softly, nodding along with his words as you watch him carefully, “You must be wicked smart, I can’t do maths to save my life.” You comment with a little giggle, biting your lip when he seems to perk up at that comment and looks up at you with a little grin.
“I can do it in my head,” he says lowly, an unexpectedly cocky edge to his voice that has your heart picking up in your chest, “Ask me a sum,” he says, a challenging glimmer in his eyes.
You hum softly, biting your lip as you think for a second, “Uhm, seventy-two plus a hundred and thirteen?”
“One eighty-five,” he chuckles after no more than a second before scoffing a little, “Come on, give me one that’s hard, love.”
Love? The little pet name makes you raise an eyebrow before you laugh softly. “What do you mean a hard one?” You giggle, shaking your head, “That one was hard!”
“That was hard for you?” He teases, making your cheeks tingle as a pink flush settles over your skin, “What’re you reading, then?”
“Art history!” You chirp proudly, chuckling nervously when you see him roll his eyes a bit, “What? Something wrong with that?”
He shakes his head dismissively, quickly polishing off the last of his pint before setting the empty class on a table and turning back to you, pushing his glasses up his nose with a grin, “Ask me another one, then. Biggest numbers you can think of.”
You don’t know why, but something about his little challenge has you blushing again, like he’s testing you somehow. But still, you take a moment to think of some numbers, biting your lip and quirking your eyes up toward the ceiling.
“Six hundred thirty-two times… eight hundred ninety-one,” you hum, cocking your head to the side as you watch him closely. His eyes seem to glaze over, only for a second, before once again he’s spouting off numbers like a calculator.
“Five hundred sixty-three thousand, one hundred and twelve.”
Your eyebrows raise at that as you gawk at him. “Wow…,” you breathe after a moment, blinking as you stare up at him, “You’re, like, super smart, then?”
“Suppose so,” he says, smiling shyly again as he tucks both hands into the pockets of his khaki pants.
You study him for a moment as the conversation lulls, finding something endlessly fascinating about the boy; the way he could swing from being so cocky and self assured to shy and awkward makes your stomach do summersaults. Turning your head, you spot your group of friends still dancing and you look back at Michael with a little sigh as another upbeat song blasts loudly through the pub.
“D’you wanna get out of here?” You ask, smirking when he looks up at you shyly.
“W-What?”
“My dorm’s only, like, a minute from here,” you flirt, sweet and enticing as you make him blush somehow more, “We could go somewhere more… quiet?”
He stares at you for a moment, shocked that you’re asking him of all people to come back to yours before he nods and nervously runs a hand through his wheat colored hair, unsuccessfully trying to act casual. “Yeah, yeah, I can do that.”
“Yay!” You giggle happily, flirtatiously grabbing one of his hands as you saunter past him, heading for the exit, “C’mon, it’s like a five minute walk!” He nods wordlessly and you can’t help but smirk as he follows you like a lost little puppy.
True to your word, it’s only a few minutes later when you and Michael reach your dorm room, after you’d stopped for a minute at the entrance to your hall to chat with Farleigh, who seemed very interested in the nerdy boy following at your heels. You just couldn’t wipe the smirk off your face as you and Michael left him standing at the doors, mouth open and a wicked little gleam in his eyes; no doubt, he’d immediately scurried off to the King’s Arms.
The door to your room opens with a tiny squeak, blasted old building, and you all but prance inside, turning back to the blond boy still lingering in the doorway with a smile.
“Am I going to have to invite you in like a vampire?” You joke with a little laugh as you bend down to quickly undo the buckles of your heels, letting out a relieved sigh when you finally step out of them, leaving you in frilly white ankle socks.
Michael finally steps into your room with a huffed laugh and quickly kicks off his shoes, you smirk when you see his Star Wars themed socks. “‘M no vampire, love,” he quips, gold framed eyes darting around your room as he looks over every detail. You grin at the little blush on his cheeks and perch on the edge of your bed to watch him, head tilted ever so slightly.
“It’s, uh, it’s cute in here,” he observes, his voice a low hum as he takes in your frilly, lacy curtains, plush white rug, and equally girlish floral bedding, all encased in the faint pink glow of the heart-shaped fairy lights strung up around the room, “Just like how I imagined…” He breathes, so lowly you doubt he meant to say that bit aloud.
“Like you imagined?” You echo with a little giggle, quickly reapplying your lip gloss before setting the little tube on the corner of your desk.
“I just… I – It’s just very… you, is all I meant,” he stutters, running a hand through his hair awkwardly, the apples of his cheeks flushed a dark pink.
His awkwardness is so endearing, you can’t help but grin. The more time you spend with him, the more interesting he seems to become; this bumbling, nervous boy is so different from the one you’ve seen on campus so many times. On campus, he’s comfortable, quiet still, but with a definite air of confidence – clearly in his element as he prowls through bookshelves in the library or explains some complex math formula in the quad.
“So, you think about me often, then?” Your voice stays sweet, innocent almost, though you can’t help but tease him; he’s so pretty when he blushes.
“No!” He answers quickly, whipping his head toward you from where he’d been studying the various pictures tacked up on the walls, everything from boy band posters to stills from Clueless and Legally Blonde. “I mean, yes, sometimes, I…,” he fumbles again and pushes his glasses up his sharp nose, “I think about you a normal amount.” He says finally, glancing at you quickly before looking away.
You hum softly and stand before walking toward him with a kind smile, though you don’t miss the way he keeps glancing down at your cleavage, or the way his Adam’s apple bobs in his throat when he swallows nervously.
“A normal amount?”
“Mhm,” he nods, gaze unsure as you come to stand in front of him, teeth biting into your plush lower lip as you twirl a piece of hair through your fingers, “As much as I think of anyone else.”
“So…,” you breathe, drawing out the word as you reach up and fiddle with the collar of his button down shirt, the turquoise gingham a bright blue blip among all the blush tones of your room, “Every time I’ve caught you looking at my tits in the library or in the quad or in the hallways��� that was just a normal amount?”
You giggle as his eyes go wide, his lips opening and closing like a fish out of water. Deciding to take mercy on him, you run a finger down his chest, playfully fiddling with the buttons on his shirt.
“Relax, I’m not mad,” you shake your head, smiling when the tension in his shoulders visibly eases, “Why wouldn’t I want a cutie like you staring?”
His lips part at that as he sucks in a little breath, blue eyes widening behind his glasses. “You think I’m… cute?” He asks breathlessly, heart pounding under your fingertip.
Your teeth sink into your bottom lip once more as you nod, cocking your head to the side just slightly as you peer up at him. “‘Course I do, honey, what’s not to like?”
Again, he gawks at you, blinking in shock and swallowing nervously.
“I –”
“I do have one question though…,” you tease, pouting a bit as you slowly and carefully undo the very top button on his shirt, relishing the way his breath hitches in his throat.
“Y-Yeah?” His voice breaks, making you giggle while he blushes somehow deeper.
“Mhm,” you nod, undoing the second button and pausing when you find a splash of hair across his chest, the same shiny wheat color as the hair on his head, causing a familiar knot to begin twisting itself up in your belly, “Why were you at the end of term party?”
He blinks for a second, evidently taken off guard. “I… W-Was it invite only?”
His question nearly makes you snort and you shake your head, the corners of your lips twitching as you try not to laugh. “No, sweetie,” you peer up at him through your lashes as you rest your hand against his bare chest, smirking ever so slightly when he shivers, “I just meant, I haven’t seen you at parties before… doesn’t really seem like your kind of thing.”
“I, well,” he stammers, the bottoms of his glasses fogging up from the heat radiating off his cheeks, “I just –”
“It’s for that club, yeah?” You ask finally, giggling at the shocked expression on his face.
“How do –”
“You lot are not nearly as sneaky as you think,” you laugh cheekily, bouncing excitedly on the balls of your feet, “Plus, I heard Felix and Oliver whispering about something to do with tasks a few weeks ago… and boys are very bad at keeping secrets once you get their cocks out.” You add with a little giggle, taking Michael’s hand once more and dragging him over to your plush bed. You sit him on the edge before all but climbing in his lap, smiling cheekily as you straddle his thighs, your knees digging into your soft bedding.
“So,” you start, holding onto his shoulders to balance yourself and smiling a little when he finally touches you, lightly resting his hands on your hips, “What’s your task, hm? I heard they made them, like, particularly brutal this year.”
“I don’t think I should say,” Michael murmurs with a little shake of his head, making you pout.
“Oh, come on!” You bounce on his lap a little, not missing the way his eyes seem to be drawn to your breasts like magnets, “I want to help! Is it something at the King’s Arms?”
“N-No, I really don’t think –”
“I know they keep the important rugby trophies there,” you think aloud, still playing dumb, just wanting him to say it, “Is that it? D’you have to steal one? One of the boys that works there owes me, I could get him to let you in after hours…” You prattle on, speaking faster and faster as Michael shakes his head beneath you.
Finally, he seems to reach a breaking point and his grip on your hips tightens. “I have to fuck you!” He blurts out before sighing.
“Oh, really?”
“I… I have to fuck you –”
“Mhm?”
“And prove I did somehow.”
“How interesting!”
He narrows his eyes at that and peers up at you suspiciously, studying you carefully. You can’t help but giggle, loving the way you feel when his eyes are on you, and you smirk when he finally blinks in realization.
“You… you knew this whole time, didn’t you?”
A sly smile spreads across your lips as you nod, squirming excitedly on his lap. “Like I said,” you chuckle with a little shrug, “Not. Sneaky!” You tease, punctuating each word with a little boop to the tip of his nose, unable to resist.
He stays silent for a moment, gazing up at you with a strange mixture of awe and unease before he finally speaks through a deep sigh. “So, I suppose this is the part where you tell me to leave?”
Well, that comment throws you off. You cock your head to the side, confused, as your eyebrows furrow together. “Why would I ask you to leave?”
He sighs again and grits his teeth, looking dejectedly at the floor. “Come on, love,” he mutters, looking anywhere but you, “I-It’s not like you’d ever want to –”
“Ever want to what?” You ask with a frown, gently grabbing at his chin and tilting his head up, forcing him to meet your gaze, “You think I don’t wanna fuck you, honey?”
“Well, I –”
“Michael,” you say pointedly, raising your brows as you smirk slightly, staring deeply into his blue eyes, “I’m the one that came onto you, yeah?”
“I… I suppose.”
“Mhm,” you hum, nodding your head as you run your fingers through his short hair, not missing the little sigh that leaves his lips when you push yourself closer to him, your chest pressing tightly against his, “And while I’m not thrilled at our first time being for some stupid little task –”
“It’s,” he cuts you off shyly, shaking his head ever so slightly, “It’s – I’ve never…” He stammers, nervously gripping at your waist once more.
You can’t help but smile softly, so charmed by him over and over. You nod your head knowingly, raising your brows just a bit. “I know, honey,” you whisper reassuringly, “We don’t have to, I’ll let you take a pair of my panties or whatever else, but we don’t need to do anything.”
He sighs up at you again, so taken with you he feels like he could scream, and shakes his head more, grabbing at your hips tighter, like he’s afraid you’ll disappear. “N-No, I… I want to,” he nods, swallowing anxiously, “I do, I just… don’t really know what I’m doing.”
You nod again, listening carefully as he speaks. “So, is it all new or…?”
He shakes his head and smiles a little, shyly, though the sight of it still makes that knot in your belly tighten further, making you blush on his lap while butterflies swirl around inside you. “I’ve kissed before,” he says lowly, chuckling awkwardly as he seems to get bolder, causing you to shudder when he lightly rubs his hands over your waist and hips, “And done… hand stuff.”
You giggle at his boyish explanation and bite your lip when you smile at him, wiggling in his lap as a heat begins to settle at the apex of your thighs. “Can I kiss you, honey?”
His Adam’s apple bobs in his throat again, making you want so badly to press soft, glossy kisses to it, but you resist, determined to make this good for him.
“Yeah,” he nods eagerly, blue eyes fixated on your lips.
You smile softly before leaning in and finally pressing your lips against his, both of you sighing at once. One of his hands stays at your hip while the other comes to rest in the small of your back, pressing you more tightly to him as your lips move together, his motions surprisingly fluid and practiced.
You make a small noise in the back of your throat when you feel his tongue licking at your bottom lip, and eagerly allow him access with a little sigh. Your fingers busy themselves with unbuttoning the rest of his shirt, making him shudder beneath you when you skim your hands over his bare chest and stomach as his tongue flows with your own, the bitter, coffee-ish flavor of the pint he’d had earlier still on his tongue.
Impatient, you pull back long enough to look at him for reassurance, smiling when you earn a little nod. You kiss him once more before tugging his shirt off, flushing when he groans lowly as you trail kisses down over his jaw and neck before swiping your tongue greedily over his Adam’s apple, making his breath hitch.
“F-Fuck,” he sighs brokenly, bolding tracing over your thigh until his fingers are tucked up under the silky, baby pink material of your dress. His touches make you shiver as goosebumps bloom over your skin, making you whine against the pale column of his throat, “Can I?” He breathes, fingers toying with a strap of your dress while the others slowly inched the bottom of it up higher and higher.
“God, please,” you mewl, nodding against his throat, your head on his shoulder. He shudders at the feel of your breath on his neck and nods once before tugging at the bottom of your dress. You sit up to help him, whining when you feel his hard length pressing against your thin, lacy underwear, “You don’t need to ask, Michael. Want you to take me however you want.” You whisper as he tugs your dress over your head, blue eyes meeting yours for a second as he nods before they skim lower, widening as he takes you in on his lap wearing only a bra and panties.
“Holy shit,” he breathes, making you giggle shyly as you lean in and softly kiss over his cheeks, “You have…you’re – you’re perfect,” he sighs, brazenly cupping your breasts, skimming his thumbs over your nipples through the thin pink fabric of your bra and smiling proudly when he feels them harden at his touch, “You’re perfect, but these are… holy shit.” He repeats, his voice breathy and mesmerized as he takes in your chest for another moment while you softly card your fingers through his golden hair.
You gasp through a little giggle when you feel his length twitch, even through his trousers, and wiggle on his lap, blushing when the movement earns you a broken groan. “Yeah?” You whisper cheekily, watching as he marvels at your chest for a second longer before quickly unclasping your bra and shrugging out of it, tossing it down onto the floor with his shirt and your dress, “What about now?” You tease, proudly arching your back as you bite your lip.
He groans again, louder than he has all evening, and instantly ducks his head down. The feel of his soft lips wrapping eagerly around one of your nipples makes you cry out, gasping sharply as he sucks at the sensitive bud before he runs his tongue over it. You cradle the back of his head in your hands, fingers lightly pulling at the short strands of hair, as he switches from one breast to the other, kneading whichever one is free with his hand.
Needing something, anything, you finally pull him off of your chest after a few moments, laughing when he all but whines, and smiling even more when you take in his disheveled appearance – blond hair sticking up at odd angles from where you’d run your fingers through it, cheeks flushed as his glasses sit crooked on his nose, and his blue eyes staring up at you hungrily.
You shift back on his thighs just enough to snake a hand between the two of you and he gasps when you cup the bulge pressing against the zipper of his khakis. “You want me to suck your cock?” You ask cheekily, lightly squeezing at his length.
He surprises you by shaking his head no,gulping slightly with an awkward laugh before answering. “I do, I really fucking do, love,” he breathes, kneading at your breasts as he stares up at you sheepishly, “B-But I really want to last and if you… if you suck it, I –”
“Okay, okay,” you stop him with a kiss, “We’ll table it for next time.”
“N-Next time?” He questions, fighting to keep his eyes open as you press kisses against his neck once more. You nod against his shoulder and press kisses up to just beneath his ear.
“I’m not letting you go that easy, honey,” you whisper, chuckling when he shivers. You spend another moment softly kissing and biting at his neck before speaking again, “Have you ever eaten anyone out?” You question, pulling back to look at him.
He shakes his head, his eyes flicking between both of yours as he looks up at you. “No.” He answers simply, his voice hardly a whisper.
You can’t help but smirk coyly and cock your head to the side, running a finger through the little patch of hair on his chest just to see him shudder. “You wanna try it?”
He nods eagerly and surprises you once again by quickly swinging you around, maneuvering you until your head rests on the pillows of your bed. You squeal at the movement, laughing with him as he settles over you, his narrow hips slotting easily between your thighs as you silently marvel at his unexpected strength, the shock of it going right between your legs.
“You want me to lick your pussy?” He asks lowly, grinning when he sees your eyes widen ever so slightly.
“You’re quite something, huh?” You breathe, still gazing up at him in surprise.
“Observant,” he shrugs, smirking as he sits up, kneeling between your legs, “You aren’t the only one who is, love.” He teases, quickly undoing his belt and trousers and groaning as he pushes them down his thighs, stopping at his knees.
Your eyes go wide at the size of his length, it’s clearly very impressive and it’s not even out of his plaid boxers yet. That smirk stays plastered on his face as he leans back down to hover over you, hastily removing his glasses and sitting them on your desk before sloppily kissing you for a moment, surprising you yet again by trailing wet kisses down your neck.
“Michael…” You sigh dreamily, arching your back toward him when he starts kissing over your chest. He groans from deep in his chest, mouth pressed against the fat of your breast.
“Fucking hell,” he curses, teasing your nipple again with the tip of his tongue, “Say it again, love.”
His simple command sends shivers down your spine and you mewl, squirming underneath him, “M-Michael!” You moan again, fumbling over your words as he sucks at your breast again before he lifts his head.
“Good girl,” he purrs with a sly, easy smirk that makes your heart jump, a soft sigh tumbling past your lips. He shifts further down the bed, kissing down over your ribs and stomach, his confidence seemingly growing every time he presses his lips against your skin; the thought makes your head spin.
Finally, he hooks his fingers into the lacy sides of your panties, and his eyes peer up at you as he tugs them down over your hips before flinging them onto the floor. “Oh, my God…,” he sighs, staring greedily at your pussy, a broken groan sounds from his throat when you spread your legs more.
You bite your lip and giggle, smiling shyly as you tangle your fingers in his hair once more. “Like what you see?”
He nods his head rapidly, making you chuckle again as he stares up at you, an almost pained expression on his face. “I… uh, w-what now?”
He’s so endearing, you can’t help the little sigh that leaves you and you sit up a little, leaning back on an elbow as you use your other hand to spread your center open. You bite your bottom lip once more when he whines a little, seeing you all spread out before him, flushed folds already slick and shiny.
“Lick here, honey,” you whimper as you skim your fingers over your clit, so keyed up from only a few kisses that you gasp a little when you feel yourself clench; Michael looks like he may pass out.
Ever the dutiful student, he gives you one last look before diving in. Your head falls back with a whiny gasp as his tongue snakes over your clit, just as you’d instructed. A long, shuddery moan leaves him, vibrating against your cunt and you watch as his blue eyes all but roll back in his head.
“Just like that, Michael,” you praise, tugging at his hair ever so slightly, which only serves to make him moan more. Your chest heaves as you watch him, determined not to let your eyes squeeze shut while he licks and kisses and sucks at your pussy like a man possessed, “Holy shit!” You whimper loudly when he pushes his tongue into you, groaning lowly when he feels your walls clench around it as he presses his nose perfectly against your clit.
“You taste so good,” he gasps, wrapping his hands around your thighs to keep you exactly where he wants. He peers up at you through blond lashes as he feasts on you, sucking eagerly at your clit and savoring the way you shiver and squirm from his motions.
Unbelievably, you already feel that warm, familiar tug in your belly beginning to grow, making your whole body feel flush and taut. “Just like that, just like that,” you whine urgently, grabbing onto his hair tighter and guiding his mouth exactly where you need it, your eyes finally rolling back and fluttering shut, “Holy fuck, don’t stop!”
Michael grunts as you tug at his hair, his own hips rutting greedily against your pretty bedding — cock throbbing so hard there’s no doubt he’s leaked through his boxers. He watches you carefully, studying your movements and reactions as best he can while he rhythmically licks at your clit.
“Oh, shit!” You cry not even a moment later, your whole body seeming to stutter as your muscles finally relax. You mewl as your high finally washes over you, savoring the way Michael groans into your cunt as he feels it contracting on his tongue. Your eyes stay squeezed shut as shivers roll up and down your spine, shuddered cries leaving your lips.
Just as his touches begin to border on overstimulation, you have enough wherewithal to push him away, and he releases your center with a lewd little pop.
“Was that good?” He asks through a breathless laugh, swallowing as he looks up at you, evidence of your arousal still shining on his lips and chin.
“Good?” You huff, eyebrows raised as you gaze down at him, “You’re sure you’ve never done that before?” You question in disbelief, chest still heaving.
He smiles shyly, already pink cheeks seeming to flush deeper from your praise as he chuckles. You cup his cheeks when he leans over you again, whimpering as you taste yourself on his tongue.
“You’re unbelievable.” You sign as he kisses down your neck again, making him chuckle against your skin.
“Just observant,” he grunts, shuddering when you wrap your legs around his trim waist. You gasp as his length brushes over your still sensitive pussy, impossibly hot and hard even through the thin fabric of his boxers. His fragmented sigh makes you smile and you tug his head up, blushing as you look up at him.
“You ready, honey?” You breathe, giggling when he nods his head again eagerly, his hips stuttering instinctually against your center. “Here, let me…” You trail off, the two of you separating for a moment as you lean over and pull open the top drawer of your desk, pulling out a pack of condoms and tearing one off before laying back down.
You watch enraptured as he kneels between your legs again, pulling down his boxers finally. “Holy…” you gasp when his cock finally bobs free, twitching up to rut against his lower stomach; he’s long and thick, curving a little as veins run up the underside, leading to a flushed, leaking head. He smiles shyly again at your attention as he shuffles awkwardly out of his trousers and underwear, kicking them off and onto the floor.
You hand him the condom and watch as he rolls it on, giving him a little reassuring smile as he does. Once it’s securely in place, you pull him back to you, eagerly kissing him once more and wrapping your legs securely around his waist. Both of you moan in unison when his length glides through your folds, the head catching perfectly on your clit.
He pulls away with a little gasp, hovering over you as he glances down at your hips. “S-So, I just…” He trails off, watching as you reach down with one hand, grunting softly when you wrap your hand around his cock.
Carefully, you position him at your entrance and angle your hips a little. “Go on, honey,” you encourage with a soft smile, running your other hand over his chest.
Nodding once, he presses forward and swears he sees God. “F-Fucking hell,” he groans, loudly sighing your name as he carefully guides himself into you, absolutely in awe at the way your hot cunt grips him. His eyes squeeze shut, his hips resting firmly against yours as his chest heaves, breaths coming in short, sharp pants.
You aren’t fairing much better, head spinning at the way he splits you open, pressing incessantly at each and every sensitive spot within you. You pant against his neck as he stills, pressed deeply within you.
“D-Do… fuck, do I just…?” Michael stutters, giving half-hearted little thrusts to test the waters.
“Yes!” You answer instantly, anxiously nodding up at him as your hips wiggle against the bedsheets, making him swear and shudder above you, “Just move, honey, do what feels good.”
He groans again and gives a little nod before experimentally moving his hips again, pulling out more this time before pushing back in. “Shit,” he breathes above you, burying his face in the crook of your neck as he grunts with each roll of his hips.
You pant underneath him, spurring him on by pressing your feet against his backside, urging him to move faster and faster as the frilly lace from your socks tickles his pale skin. “You’re doing so, so good, oh, my God,” you breathe, your voice high-pitched and whimpery as you tangle your fingers in his hair again, knowing by now that it drives him crazy.
Above you, Michael’s hips slowly but surely begin to stutter, his thrusts starting to peter out as his breathing picks up. “I’m —!”
“Wait!” You blurt suddenly, smiling wickedly as he comes to a screeching halt, pushing himself up enough to stare down at you with wild eyes, “I have an idea…” You tease with a little giggle.
“W-What?”
“You have a phone, yeah?”
“…Yeah?”
“One that can, like, take video?”
“Yes?”
“Grab it,” you laugh, pushing him off of you with a laugh. He rolls his eyes with a smirk but does as you ask, clumsily pulling himself from your heat before stumbling over to where his khakis had landed. He shuffles about for a second before pulling a silver phone from the pocket of his trousers.
“Now what?” He asks curiously, positioning himself back between your thighs, cock twitching meanly.
“Film me.”
“What?!” He gapes at you, brows creased.
“Film me, honey,” you giggle, biting your lip conspiratorially, “For your little task, you need proof, yeah?”
“Well, yeah, b-but I can just take your panties or something, I don’t —“
“Or you could bring back something better…” You smirk, shrugging your shoulders playfully, “We don’t have to but… it could be kinda hot?”
He pauses for a moment, eyes flicking between you, your pussy, and the phone in his hand before he nods once, curtly. “We… we can try it.”
“Yeah? You wanna?”
“Yeah,” he quips, catching you by surprise as a mean little smirk spreads over his lips, “Wanna see the look on Catton’s face when he sees you creaming on my cock.”
Your eyes widen and you huff out a shocked laugh, a zing of electricity lighting behind your eyes. “You’re insane,” you say softly, an endeared smile on your lips.
He snickers, his whole demeanor seeming to change before your eyes as he transforms from this shy, stuttering boy into an astonishingly cocky man. “You like it, love,” he teases, grabbing his dick and positioning himself at your entrance yet again.
“Wait!” You giggle again, blushing as he groans.
“You don’t want to anymore?”
“No, no, not that,” you assure him, affectionately running your hand down one of his shockingly muscular arms, “You can film me… on one condition.”
“‘N what would that be?”
“Take me on a date.” You breathe, suddenly shy. You know he’ll agree to it, but even still, your heart pumps wildly in your chest.
He stares at you for a second, blinking dumbly as he processes your request. “You want me to take you on a date?” He asks, flushing so deeply that the soft pink hue cascades all the way down to his chest.
Giggling, you nod your head, giving his forearm a reassuring squeeze. “You need to start giving yourself more credit, honey.”
He sighs at that, a little astounded huff, before he’s suddenly grabbing at your calves and pushing your legs up toward your shoulders, all but bending you in half, anxious to get his cock back into you. You gasp at the movement, and chuckle at his eagerness, a sound that morphs into a whiny moan when he slides back home.
“Christ,” he grunts, shoulders heaving as he gets used to the way you feel around him once more, “Y-You feel so good, love, fucking perfect.”
“You’re so big,” you whine, nodding as you look at him like he hung the stars in the sky, “You’re so good, Michael, you have no idea.”
He groans above you, hands shaking as he grabs for his phone, flipping it open and quickly opening the camera as his hips rut into you, making the springs of your bed creak softly.
As soon as Michael gives you a little nod to let you know he’s filming, you truly put on a show — or well, you at least stop trying to quiet yourself down and be conscientious of the people in the rooms next to you. The way he has your legs bent back makes him feel somehow bigger and causes his cock to hit that sensitive spot within you with pinpoint accuracy every time he thrusts in, making you clench around him and moan loudly each time he moves his hips against you.
You watch as he angles the camera down a bit, no doubt pointing it at the spot the two of you are joined together, letting the camera record his cock sliding in and out of you. When he moves it back up, however, to get your face as evidence, you plaster on the cheekiest grin you can muster.
“H-Hi boys,” you tease breathlessly, smirking as you lean up on one elbow. You wave with your other hand before blowing a kiss to the camera, which makes Michael cockily laugh.
“Fuck, I gotta…” he mutters after a few more seconds, carelessly dropping his phone down on the bed before roughly grabbing at your thighs with a bruising grip, one that makes you mewl and arch your back toward him. The two of you moan and whimper in unison as he begins thrusting wildly, seemingly too worked up to care about anything but cumming.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck!” You chant over and over, head spinning as he bullies your sweet spot.
“That’s it, love,” Michael murmurs, his voice gruff and low as he stares down at you, strands of his hair sticking to his forehead; he looks wilder than you’ve ever seen him, the thought only serving to push you closer and closer to the edge. “S-Shit, that’s it. Fucking come for me, cream on my cock; please, please, please,” he murmurs, leaning down to press desperate kisses against your neck and collarbones.
The new position causes his pubic bone to rub deliciously over your clit, making you seize beneath him with a loud whine. Your toes curl, heels still pressing into the small of his back. “M-Michael, holy fuck!” You practically squeal as your high finally washes over you once more, stars dancing behind your eyelids as you go lax and pliant underneath him.
The feel of your walls pulsing around his cock has Michael reeling, his hips somehow thrusting even faster as he both desperately wants to cum while also never wanting this feeling to end. “C-Cum, honey, cum,” you pant softly, cupping his cheek with one hand and turning his face toward yours.
That does him in and the rubber band in his belly viciously snaps, making him shudder above you as his thrusts come to a halt, cock twitching wildly inside you as he empties himself into the condom. You watch him in awe, taking in every detail from the way his nose scrunches up as his eyes squeeze close to the way he whispers your name over and over like a prayer.
The two of you lay in silence for a moment, his breath warm against your neck as he slumps against you trying to catch his breath.
Eventually, you can’t help it anymore and let out a breathless giggle, which only intensifies when he props himself up on an elbow to peer down at you with a smirk.
“Something funny?”
“Just,” you breathe, trying to calm yourself enough to get words out, “Just… wow,” you finally say, giggles petering out as you look up at him, the soft gleam in his eyes makes your heart clench in your chest.
“Good wow?” He blushes, looking down between the two of you as he pulls himself from your walls with a little hiss.
“Very, very good wow,” you confirm, grinning as you watch him pull off the condom before he peers up at you with a sheepish grin. “Tie it off, honey,” you instruct, smirking as he does just that, before nodding to the little wastebasket by your desk.
He gets up with a groan and quickly tosses the condom in the trash before turning back to you, the bashful look on his face making you blush.
Unable to resist, you grin at him and spread your arms with a giggle, wordlessly inviting him for a cuddle, which he gladly accepts. The bed creaks slightly as he lays back down, relaxing his head on the pillow just beside yours. Again, the two of you stay silent for a moment, content to merely gaze at one another, before he shyly looks away and sighs.
“I…,” he starts, blue eyes blinking and flitting around your room as he gathers his thoughts, “Thank you,” he finally says, looking back at you with a little half smile.
Your brows furrow at this as you grin at him. “What’re you thanking me for?”
“Well, f-for… this,” he says, gesturing vaguely at the two of you before sitting up just slightly and fishing around in the blankets for a second. “And this,” he sighs, holding his phone up before twisting around to set it on the corner of your desk, turning back to you. “I just… I know you didn’t have to, is all, so…”
You cock your head to the side as you prop yourself up on an elbow, eyes narrowing as you study him closely. “And people have the nerve to say I’m thick,” you joke, lips spreading into a wide grin as you gaze down at him, “I wanted to do all this, Michael. I’m the one that came onto you, remember?”
“W-Well, yeah, but —“
“No buts!” You laugh, pressing a finger against his lips as you shake your head, “I have eyes too, you know.”
“What does that mean?”
“You haven’t been the only one watching someone for months,” you giggle shyly, pressing your forehead against his, “I meant what I said about that date, too.”
His arms wind around your waist, holding you tight as he processes your words with a dumbstruck smile, blushing under your gaze. “Whatever you say, love,” he concedes finally, pressing his lips against yours sweetly.
He yawns tiredly when he pulls away from you after a moment, which only makes you yawn as well, and you glance over at the little clock on your dresser. “Christ,” you gasp, turning back to him, “I didn’t realize it’s already almost four… you can crash here, if you want?”
He considers it for a moment, knowing he has to be back in that stupid little basement by noon and making a mental map of where exactly your dormitory is in relation to the Merton College Chapel. “I… I can stay, yeah,” he finally nods after a moment.
“You’re sure?”
“Love, I’m not sure my legs work well enough yet to walk out of here anyway.”
Michael
Groaning, Michael slowly blinks his eyes open, rubbing them softly as he sits up in bed with a yawn. Blindly reaching over for his glasses, he’s confused when he doesn’t feel them in their usual spot and finally opens his eyes properly.
He stares, confused for a moment as to how exactly he somehow got transported into what appears to be Barbie’s damn dream house, before the events of last night come flooding back to him.
“Holy shit,” he breathes when he turns his head and sees your still-sleeping form beneath your flowery sheets, your hair tousled wildly on the pillow as your shoulders rise and fall evenly still with each breath. Looking around, he finally spots his glasses and puts them on before reaching for his phone, and cursing again when he sees the time.
11:47 AM.
He practically falls out of your bed as he tries to extricate himself from the sheets, and he hears you wake with a start behind him as he grabs wildly at his clothes on the floor.
“Michael?” You ask questioningly, your voice still hoarse from sleep as you, frankly fucking adorably, rub at your eyes before fixing him with a curious look.
“Gotta, shit, gotta run,” he explains quickly, cursing as he nearly loses his balance trying to tug his trousers on, “Need to be at Merton Chapel in, like, Christ, ten minutes!”
“Ohh,” you giggle softly, watching with amusement as he finishes getting dressed, hair and clothes so disheveled that he’s sure he looks like the very definition of the walk of shame.
Just as he’s tugging his shoes on and making a mad dash for the door, you stop him. “Here,” you smirk, holding out the same lacy pair of pink panties you wore last night, “For proof,” you explain, nodding to the phone in his hand, “Along with that. Should be more than enough,” you giggle proudly.
He smiled sheepishly as he pockets your underwear. “T-Thanks,” he nods, turning to leave before you stop him once more.
He can’t help but blush when you lean in and press and quick kiss to his lips, your cherry chapstick rubbing off on him some. Pulling away, you playfully smack his chest with a little grin. “Go get ‘em, honey.”
Nodding, he smiles again before finally pulling your door open and bounding down the hallway. “I’ll text you, love!” He calls, peering back just before he rounds a corner, “About that date!”
It’s 11:58 on the dot when he flings the basement door open, only to be pulled over to the same stupid dank basement wall, his back hitting it once more with a dull thud.
Glancing around, he sees the ski-masked boys again, all fifteen of them, standing in a row with the head boy slightly out of line. To his left stands one of the other initiates, clutching a black tube of some sort.
The basement stays silent for a moment before one of the masked boy’s watch alarms goes off just as the bells in the tower begin to chime.
Once, twice, all the way up to twelve. Noon.
Right on cue, the head boy steps forward even more and looks between Michael and the other initiate. “Your friend couldn’t be bothered to show his face, then?” He asks, dark eyes peering at the boy next to Michael.
He scoffs and shakes his head, glaring at the head boy. “He’s still at the bank!” He snaps, “All the way in bloody Switzerland,” he kicks at the dirty stone floor as he explains, “Dickhead,” he finally mutters lowly under his breath.
“Shame,” the head boy quips, clasping his hands in front of his waist, “Some men are simply not cut out for Bullingdon.”
The boys in the row behind him nod knowingly, each making some little noise of affirmation until the head boy quickly stops them, holding a fist up by his head, bringing it back down to his side when they shut up.
“So, initiates, what’ve you got?”
The boy next to Michael steps forward first and hands the black tube to the head boy with a sigh. “There,” he says, gesturing to it, “There’s your bloody map. My mum could get sacked for that.”
The head boy pops open one end of the tube, a document sleeve Michael now realizes, and gingerly extracts a rolled up piece of parchment from it, unrolling it just enough to confirm it's what they asked for.
“Well done, initiate,” he nods, seemingly impressed as he flashes a smile at the boy, white teeth gleaming creepily through the slit in his ski mask. Carefully, he rolls the document up again before sliding it back in the tube, “Your commitment to Bullingdon will take you far. Welcome to the fray.”
The boy stands still for a moment, eyeing the document tube with an almost regretful expression before curtly nodding and taking his place back against the wall.
“And then there was one,” the head boy murmurs, dark faze fixed on Michael, “I seem to remember we gave you quite the… interesting task indeed, initiate. How did you manage?”
Smiling damn near arrogantly, Michael all but skips up the head boy and proudly pulls your panties from his back pocket, letting them dangle from his index finger. “See for yourself.”
The head boy grabs them by the edge and studies them for a moment, turning back to the row of boys behind him with a questioning glance. The boy Michael knows already to be that cunt, Oliver Quick, glances between him, the panties, and Michael, before cutting a sideways glance to a tall boy standing next to him.
“These could be anyone’s,” the head boy says, turning back to Michael as he shakes his head, “You could’ve nicked them from your sister or something, we’ll need more than this, initiate.”
“Don’t even have a sister,” Michael quips, shrugging his shoulders with a little frown.
“Okay, like, your cousin or something then –”
“Don’t have a female cousin,” he says with a shake of his head, “All boys.”
“The point still stands!” The head boy finally snaps, making Michael bite the inside of his cheek to hide a little laugh, though the corner of his lips still quirks up in a smirk, “You haven’t got any proof, do you? Is that why you’re stalling?”
Huffing a little laugh, Michael finally lets himself smirk meanly and steps closer to the head boy as he pulls his phone from his pocket, flips it open, and navigates to his video gallery. “Is this enough proof?” He teases, pressing play on the most recent video.
The picture is small and grainy but there’s no doubt as to what’s happening as the sound of your pretty whimpers and moans echoes around the brick basement, along with the wet smack of Michael’s cock driving into you again and again.
The head boy stares at the screen still as curiosity gets to a few of the boys in the row behind him and they all come crowd around Michael’s phone, eyes widening behind their ski masks and mouths falling open.
The tallest one, the one Oliver keeps glancing at, lets out a long sigh as he peers down at the small screen and brings a hand up to his head as if he were going to run it through his hair before remembering the mask he has on. With him this close, Michael finally notices the little silver barbell stuck through his eyebrow and shivers as his lips curl up into a sadistic Cheshire cat smile, a tidal wave of savage pride crashing through his system.
Finally, fucking finally, I get something he wants, he thinks as your breathy moans continue to pour from the speaker of his phone, tinny and muffled in some spots where he’d accidentally covered the microphone, but beautiful, beautiful and because of him.
After a moment, the video ends, the tiny phone screen reverting back to it’s little thumbnail as the head boy peers up at Michael, the rest of the club members taking their places back in line, though he can’t help but notice that Felix’s broad shoulders are slumped now and Oliver stands ever closer to him, like some kind of fucked up bodyguard.
“I’ll be damned, initiate,” the head boy sighs with a shake of his head, “I really didn’t think you had it in you.”
He watches as Michael merely nods and pockets his phone again, holding it tightly in his fist even still. After a second, he smiles widely and claps a hand on his shoulder, shaking him slightly.
“Welcome to Bullingdon.”
Some time later, Michael finally exits the basement, a few of the club members, sans ski masks now, nodding goodbye to him as they disperse across campus, meeting adjourned.
He wasn’t really sure what he’d been expecting from the initial meeting but it was mostly them prattling on about where exactly they had all their grubby little fingers, poked in seemingly every facet of society from Parliament to local newspapers.
Braggy cunts, Michael thinks as he ambles outside, glancing up at the sky as he steps into the Mob Quad, surrounded by stony old buildings.
Smiling to himself, he pulls out his phone and quickly finds your number in his contacts list, blushing when he sees you’ve taken the liberty of adding some girly heart emoticon next to it. He hardly has time to press it against his ear before you answer.
“Well?” You demand with that now familiar giggle, some unfamiliar pop song playing in the background.
“I’m in,” he confirms, nodding to himself as he slowly walks in the direction of his dormitory, “Thanks to you.” He smiles like an idiot when you laugh.
“Don’t sell yourself short, honey,” you tease, he can picture your bright, glossy smile in his head, “You earned that spot.”
Michael merely shakes his head with a happy little sigh. “So,” he starts, clearing his throat and pushing his glasses up the bridge of his nose, “About that date… I was thinking the King’s Arms? Tonight at six, if that works?”
“Oooh, tonight at six,” you repeat teasingly, an image flashing in his mind of you twirling your hair around a perfectly manicured finger, “Someone’s quite eager, hm?”
“Can you blame me?”
“Hmm, I suppose not,” you giggle, pausing for a second, “It’s a date then.”
“Fantastic,” Michael sighs, trying with every fiber of his being to sound casual and cool about the whole thing, even as his heart threatens to beat out of his chest.
“See you tonight, Mr. Bullingdon,” you tease, making a little kissy sound into the phone before hanging up.
Michael pauses for a moment, standing to the side on the pavement as he nods to himself. If it weren’t so fucking cheesy, he’d raise his fist in the air, victorious, à la Judd Nelson at the end of The Breakfast Club.
Instead, he flips his phone back open and navigates back to your video. Sighing, he stares at the little thumbnail for a second before deleting it, pocketing his phone once more, and continuing back to his dormitory.
He has the real thing now.
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#michael gavey#michael gavey fanfiction#michael gavey fanfic#michael gavey smut#michael gavey x reader#michael gavey x you#michael gavey x y/n#michael gavey x bimbo!reader#bimbo!reader#bimbocore#saltburn#saltburn fanfiction#saltburn fanfic#saltburn fic#saltburn smut#michael gavey fic#ewan nation#ewanverse#emerald fennell#ewan mitchell#my writing
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♥ Love you Love you Love you Love you
AND 100 FOLLOWERS THANK YUO SO MUCCH AAAA FLAMEREAVER PHAINON AAAA!! Phainon header art is mine!! Flamereaver phainon fanart below at the end of the post

The first time you met Phainon, he was leaning against the marketplace wall, bathed in the amber glow of Amphoreus' setting sun. His fluffy white hair ruffled in the breeze, and his blue eyes sparkled with mischief as he greeted you with a grin, the picture of an ordinary young man with a penchant for teasing.
But you were never one to trust easily. Especially not when his swordsmanship—so graceful, so precise—felt oddly reminiscent of a ghost story whispered through the alleys at night. But in the end you fell for him, you fell into an inescapable rabbit hole for him.
The Flamereaver.
A nameless swordmaster who carved a path of ruin, driven by a thirst for the Titans’ Coreflame. A shadow in the black tide, their identity unknown.
You brushed the thoughts away at first. Phainon was charming, sometimes irritatingly so. He paid attention to the smallest details, catching things even you overlooked. His laughter was easy, his movements controlled, but there was something about him—something lurking beneath the surface. A momentary flicker in his gaze when he spoke of fire, of war, of lost things.
And then the Grove of Epiphany burned.
You stood at the edge of the ruin, the scent of ash thick in the air, staring at the lone figure amidst the wreckage. His back was to you, but you knew that stance. That impossible, immaculate swordplay.
A gust of wind carried the embers, and he turned.
Phainon’s blue eyes met yours, and for the first time, they were cold.
Madness and obsession entwined within them like an inferno restrained by sheer will. His sword—slick with molten red—gleamed under the fractured moonlight.
“Ah,” he murmured, voice still as light as before, but tinged with something… older. “I suppose you’ve figured it out now.”
Your heart pounded. “You’re the Flamereaver.”
Phainon sighed, running a hand through his ashen locks, expression almost sheepish. “I preferred when you just thought I was a little too perceptive.”
“Why?” The word came out raw, barely above a whisper.
He tilted his head, considering. “Because I must. Because the Coreflame calls.”
His sword rose, an invitation, a warning.
“Will you stand in my way?”
You didn’t know how to answer.
Because the Phainon you knew—the one who smiled, who made a game of guessing your thoughts, who felt so achingly human—was standing before you, wreathed in the flames of a legend that should never have been real.
And yet, he was still Phainon.
Still the man who watched the stars with you.
Still the man who now waited for your answer, his gaze unreadable, his grip on his sword loose—but ready.
The flames crackled around you both, but all you could hear was the sound of your own heartbeat.
And his quiet, unwavering breath.
Then, he spoke again, his voice softer, almost pleading beneath the weight of something neither of you could control. "I didn’t choose this. The Coreflames… they are my burden. I must take them all, or—" He clenched his jaw, shutting his eyes for a moment before opening them again, burning with desperate resolve. "Or everything will be undone."
His fingers tightened around his sword, knuckles pale. "It’s madness, I know. But I have no choice. Every Coreflame I claim brings me closer to an end I cannot escape." A bitter chuckle escaped his lips, but there was no mirth in it. "So tell me, will you hate me for it? Will you turn away now, knowing what I am?"
His gaze softened—achingly so. Even with those cold, inhuman eyes, he looked at you as if you were something precious. Something he wished he could hold onto, even as the fire consumed him.
"If you stay…" Phainon exhaled, his grip trembling for the first time. "You will see what I truly am. And I fear—" He hesitated, his voice dropping into something barely above a whisper. "I fear that I will not have the strength to let you go."
The fire roared behind him, licking at the ruins of a past he could never return to.
And yet, in this moment, with his sword lowered and his heart laid bare, Phainon stood before you—not as the Flamereaver, not as a legend, but as a man on the edge of despair, clinging to the last remnants of something real.
You.
And then, as if realizing his own weakness, Phainon took a step back, forcing steel into his voice. "You should leave." The words were clipped, calculated—like the swing of a blade meant to sever something before it could grow too deep. "Go before I change my mind."
But his eyes betrayed him.
Even as he turned away, as he tried to retreat into the cold, his gaze lingered, filled with something twisted and aching. A love so consuming it bordered on obsession. A longing so desperate it threatened to unravel him.
Phainon had always been good at deception. But not with you.
Not when his very soul was screaming for you to stay, even as his lips told you to run.
And in that moment, you understood.
Phainon did not fear the Coreflames. He did not fear battle or ruin or even his own demise.
He feared losing you.
And the worst part? He already had.

Your breath hitched as you took a hesitant step forward. The embers danced around his silhouette, painting him in a light both divine and damning.
"Phainon…" You whispered his name, but he did not turn. His grip on his sword tightened instead, knuckles bloodless.
Another step.
The blade was at your throat before you could react, its edge gleaming with the reflected flames of everything he'd destroyed.
"Don’t."
The word was hoarse, raw, barely above a breath, but it carried the weight of something lethal. Phainon's expression was composed, carved from cold steel—but his eyes.
His eyes betrayed him.
They held the torment of a man drowning, even as his hands pushed you away.
"You don’t know what you're doing," he continued, voice sharper than the blade itself. "I warned you. You should have listened."
But you did know. You knew exactly what you were doing.
And you knew what he was doing, too.
You could see it in the way his fingers trembled, the way his chest rose and fell with breathes too uneven for someone as disciplined as him. You could feel it in the space between you—so close yet impossibly far.
"Then tell me to leave," you said, voice steady despite the sting of metal against your skin. "Tell me you don’t care. Tell me you wouldn’t regret it if I walked away right now."
A flicker.
Just for a second, his lips parted—silent, breathless, as if the words had caught in his throat before they could escape.
Then, his jaw clenched.
He pressed the blade a fraction closer, the bite of it sharp but not enough to draw blood. It was a warning. One that you knew, deep down, he would never follow through with.
"Go," he forced out. "While you still can."
And yet, despite his words, his gaze remained locked onto you, burning with something far more dangerous than fire.
Something desperate.
Something that screamed that if you took another step, if you reached for him—he would break.
And he would take you down with him.
But maybe… maybe you were already falling.
"One more step," he murmured, his voice flat, almost bored, "and I’ll carve you open like the rest."
A lie.
You knew it was.
You could see it in the tension coiling through his muscles, in the way his grip on his weapon was almost too tight, as if it were the only thing tethering him to this wretched act of self-denial.
But his eyes—
Those blue, frostbitten eyes were void of the warmth that once greeted you at dusk. They didn’t waver, didn’t soften. They remained locked onto you with the lethal calculation of a man who had convinced himself of his own monstrosity.
And still, you moved closer.
Another step.
Another drop of blood slipping from his blade.
Something inside him snapped.
With a sharp inhale, Phainon moved faster than breath, his weapon slashing outward—stopping just short of your throat. Close enough for you to feel the whisper of its edge, for the heat of freshly spilled blood to radiate between you.
You didn’t flinch.
He noticed.
His lips curled into something that wasn’t quite a smirk, wasn’t quite a snarl. "You don’t get it, do you?" His voice was quiet, laced with something dark. "I am not playing with you."
His weapon remained poised, steady, the weight of it absolute.
And yet, in the flickering light, you saw it—the minuscule tremor in his fingers, the unspoken war behind his stare.
He wanted you to fear him.
He wanted you to run.
But even now, with his face splattered in blood and his hands heavy with ruin—he could not bring himself to push you away.
"Why aren’t you afraid?"
You didn’t answer. Because you knew fear had never been the problem.
He let out a sharp breath, his control slipping. "Damn you," he whispered, his grip tightening. "You should be running. You should hate me."
A muscle in his jaw ticked. He took another step forward, backing you into the ruins. Not to corner you—no, it wasn’t that. He just wanted to be closer. To see you clearer.
To feel your warmth in the cold abyss he had thrown himself into.
His free hand, the one not gripping his sword, twitched at his side. He wanted to touch you. To brush the soot from your skin, to trace the shape of you with reverence, to make sure you were still real. That you hadn’t left him behind like the rest.
Phainon inhaled sharply through his nose, his expression twisting. He was losing this battle.
"You don’t understand," he growled, his voice raw now, slipping past the walls he had built. "I would burn this world for you. I would tear the Coreflames from the Titans themselves if it meant keeping you safe."
His blade lowered an inch. His control cracked another fracture.
"But you… you are the one thing I cannot have." His voice was hoarse, his breathing uneven. "Because I would ruin you. I would drag you into my flames, and I would never let you go."
You could see it now, the full weight of his obsession. The way it clawed at his ribs, at his very being. He could not afford to love you, and yet he did—so completely, so utterly, that it hurt.
And still, despite it all, you took another step. Closing the space between you.
Phainon shuddered. His sword fell from your throat. He let it drop, let it clang uselessly to the ground between you. His hands, empty now, hovered—hesitant, desperate, aching.
His breath was unsteady, his entire body wound too tight, as if one more second of restraint would shatter him entirely.
"You should run," he whispered one last time.
But his hands had already found your face. His sharp golden claws went over your skin, the cold metallic claws made you shiver, touch featherlight, as if he was afraid he would break you.
Or maybe… as if he was afraid you would break him.
His forehead pressed against yours, his breath warm, shaky. His heart thundered against his ribs, wild, unrestrained.
"I should let you go," he murmured, but his grip only tightened. But Then— Phainon trembled.
For all his power, for all the flames that had swallowed cities at his command, he was fragile beneath your touch.
His breaths came shallow, uneven. His body was wound tight, every muscle locked in a battle he had already lost. And when your fingers—warm, steady, unbearably gentle—cupped his face, he broke.
A sharp, wounded inhale. A shudder.
Then, the first whimper left his lips.
It was soft, barely there, but it shattered something inside him. He tried to hold it in, to swallow the weakness, but it was too late. His knees buckled slightly, his weight pressing into you, seeking something—anything—solid to hold onto. His forehead still rested against yours, but now he was trembling, his breath hitching as the first tear slipped down his cheek.
"I…" His voice cracked. His hands, rough with callouses and stained with blood, clutched at you like you were his last tether to sanity. "I can’t—"
Another whimper, this one quieter, almost strangled.
Phainon, the Flamereaver, the man who had stood alone against armies, who had burned everything in his path, was crying.
Not for the world he had lost.
Not for the lives he had taken.
But for you.
Because he knew he could never have you the way he wanted—not without dragging you into his fire, not without dooming you to the same madness that consumed him.
And yet, he couldn’t let go.
His fingers dug into your waist, clinging as if you might disappear. His body shook against yours, and when you ran your thumb over the tear-stained skin of his cheek, another broken sound escaped him—something between a sob and a sigh of surrender.
"You shouldn’t be here," he whispered, but it was an empty protest. One he didn’t believe himself.
Because when you held him, when your fingers combed through his bloodstained hair, he leaned into you like a man starved.
Like you were the only thing that had ever been real in his world of fire and ruin.
"I love you," he choked out, the words raw, torn straight from the depths of his soul. A confession and a curse all at once. "I love you so much it’s killing me."
His grip tightened, desperate.
"And if you don’t leave now…" He exhaled shakily, pressing his damp face into your shoulder, his body curling inward, caging you against him. "I’ll never let you go." . . . . . You had always loved Phainon. Not just the man who teased you beneath the golden glow of Amphoreus’ sun, not just the warrior with an unreadable gaze and a blade that moved like lightning, but all of him—the bloodstained, broken, and burning parts too.
Your heart ached, raw and desperate. He had tried to push you away, to scare you with the sharp edge of his blade, but he had underestimated you.
You were just as lost in him as he was in you.
With trembling hands, you cupped his face, your thumbs gliding over his cheekbones, wiping away the smears of blood that marred his skin. The red smeared under your touch, streaking his pale skin with warmth that did not belong to him.
His breath stuttered, his lips parting slightly, but he didn’t pull away.
He never could, not from you.
Your thumbs brushed down, grazing the corner of his mouth, lingering there. His lips were slightly chapped, parted as if he wanted to say something, but the words never came. Instead, his breath hitched—a shuddering, fragile thing—and you could see the war raging inside him.
The desperation. The love so overwhelming it made him weak.
Phainon’s hands twitched against your waist, torn between pulling you closer and keeping you away. But you made the choice for him.
You surged forward, claiming his lips in a kiss that burned.
It was not gentle. It was not soft. It was everything you had both held back for too long.
Phainon inhaled sharply against your mouth, a strangled gasp lost between your lips as his hands finally—finally—snapped up to grasp you, no longer holding back. One hand tangled into your hair, the other clutching your waist so tightly it almost hurt, pressing you against him as if you might disappear if he let go.
You deepened the kiss, tilting your head, and he whimpered against your mouth. The sound made your stomach twist, heat pooling in your chest as your fingers slid into his silver-white locks, pulling slightly. He groaned, the sound low and needy, and then he kissed you back with a fervor that nearly stole your breath away.
Phainon kissed like a man who had never known softness, like he was trying to carve the memory of you into his soul. His lips moved against yours feverishly, desperately, like he was terrified this moment would be ripped away from him.
His tongue flicked against your bottom lip, hesitant, seeking, and you granted him entry without hesitation. The kiss deepened, turned messier, hotter. He swallowed your gasp as his arms caged you in, his body pressing you closer, like he was trying to mold you into him, to make you his in every way possible.
Your hands slid down, over the hard lines of his shoulders, his chest, feeling the tension coiled in his muscles. His heart pounded beneath your palm, beating wildly, erratically, and you realized—he was scared.
Not of you. Never of you.
But of what he might do to keep you. Of how far he was willing to go.
Phainon broke the kiss with a ragged gasp, his forehead pressing against yours, his breath warm and uneven. His hands trembled where they gripped you, his body taut with restraint, as if he was fighting himself even now. "Please.. Stay.. By you, I am forever incomplete."

THIS WAS RUSHED IM SORYRYR IM USING MY MOBILE DATA
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