#headcanon that she uses a torn plastic bag as a top

[sobredunia]

Mer Uzomi doodle from @neko-naruto 's fic

Ur honor. Her.

You can play Kenikari here! (And you can read the fic here)

@rotkad @7hefear @beetroot-merchant @ashingtonkisihita

@h3xt0r @bree-sae @helloidkwhatimdoing-0 @zecrisketch @princelyre

[scavengerfive]

Good Enough

I actually signed up for the Abel Secret Santa exchange which was nerve-wracking. Writing fiction about people you know is a bit weird, I know, but it’s all in good fun. I even got Sam to proofread it for me, but between him and me, it’s likely things are still a bit rough. Nonetheless, here it is.

I hope it’s something, @puzzle-of-many-pieces. Thanks for putting all of this together, @runnerzero and @notforconsumption. It takes place in some obscure limbo of season 1. I’m used to writing quiet, stoic, or shy Fives, so when Lyric said they headcanoned Five as vocal, Five ended up coming out as quirky and weird which was fun.

Merry Christmas! Happy Holidays! 

---

“Looking good, Runner Five.”

“There he goes again. It’s really unfair. How come I can never get Sam to flirt with me? It makes a man feel a bit insecure.”

“W-what? I-I’m not flirting… I was just–Five is making good time, and there are no zombs close enough to worry about. That’s all I meant.”

“Sure, it is. So, how come you didn’t say, ‘Looking good, runners’?” There are three of us out here, you know.”

“Well-I–I mean–I didn’t forget–I just… shut up, Simon.”

“Hey, you know the rules. Numbers only.”

“You!? You want to talk about rules?”

Jody’s muffled giggles were clear over the commlink, and you too snickered to yourself as Sam’s voice hit a new octave. Simon never failed to wind Sam up. You didn’t mind the banter. It was better than the oppressive silence of another ghost town or a chorus of the undead making their rounds. Like Sam said, there were no zombs in the immediate vicinity, so you couldn’t hear any eerie moaning filling the air.

You couldn’t see the other two runners anymore, but you trusted them to take care of themselves. You would all meet up soon enough anyways. For now, you scanned the signs of the buildings you passed. Each runner had specific items to collect, things the township was running low on, but there was enough leeway for you to snag anything you thought would be handy or appreciated.

You found yourself stepping into an old convenience store. It had clearly been ransacked quite a few times, but there were always things people overlooked. You bagged a few expired painkillers and batteries, along with twine and deodorant (which was definitely needed). Your eyes alighted on a box behind the counter, and with a small smile, you shoved it into your bag before roaming the aisles, snagging a few more supplies. You knocked some books into the bag along with magazines, paper, and pens.

“All right, guys. It’s time to head back home. You’ve got everything you need?” Sam asked.

The commlink was filled with affirmatives, and as you jogged back towards Abel, you were joined by Jody then Simon, the two runners falling to your side. You flashed a quick smile to each of them.

“So, how was your luck?” Simon asked, an easy smile on his lips.

Jody grimaced.

“I got most of my stuff, but it’s really hard to find a working radio nowadays,” she said. “Found a broken one. It should be good for parts.”

“Five?”

You adjusted the bag on your back, squinting into the setting sun. You thought you could see the radio tower in the distance even though you should be too far off to spot it yet. It was most likely wistful imaginings.

“Good. You?”

“Janine should be pleased. I got her those wire strippers she’s always asking for. Plus, a few things for the Doc.”

Your headset crackled to life, and you heard Sam’s voice over the commlink again.

“I’ve spotted a few zombs in your path, but they should shamble on before you guys reach them. Keep an eye out though.”

“Got it, Sam,” Simon and Jody said at the same time, and Jody added, “Thanks.”

The three of you ran in comfortable silence, each keeping an eye out for any nasty surprises lurking. Soon enough, you could actually see the tower this time, the red beacon switched on even though there was still enough light to see your surroundings.

“So…”

Your eyes drifted over to look at Simon who had a mischievous smile growing on his face. You felt mild trepidation at the sight, but it was swiftly overpowered by a familiar excitement. You and Simon were dangerous together because you were too easily caught up in his recklessness. So, you were not the least bit surprised when the next two words came out of his mouth.

“Race ya?”

“Wait, what? Guys!” Jody yelled as you booked it after Simon’s cackling form.

“Keep up, Runner 4!”

“Not again, guys,” Sam groaned in your ears, and you grinned.

—

“You’ve really been keeping yourself busy, Five. I think you have your name down for every supply run we have coming up for the next month. All that on top of your regular missions? If you keep this up, Maxine might mandate a break for you, and I would agree with her.”

You were rifling through the sports equipment as Sam worried in your ears, something you were used to by now. You supposed some of these compression sleeves you were examining would be useful and bagged them. Extra protection. Circulation efficiency. Whoo!

“I’m fine, Sam. I won’t overdo it.”

“If you say so… what are you looking for anyways?”

“Cricket bat.”

“Why?”

“Request.”

“Ah…”

You moved into the next aisle, coming across some fishing gear and archery equipment. There were no rods left (understandably), but there were some string and a few hooks. You knew Janine would be eager to get her hands on anything useful, so you were quick to fill your pockets, snagging the hooks through your bag’s straps to secure them. There was little else of note but two plastic bows, a few arrows, and other archery equipment like sights and guards, which surprised you. You would have expected people to have taken everything, but you supposed archery wasn’t the most common skill. A bow and quiver of arrows would be an unnecessary burden if someone didn’t know how to use them.

You picked up a bow and plucked the string in thought.

Cr-clash!

A stand collapsed to the ground, and a zombie in a tattered shirt stumbled over it. It still had a name tag hanging off the torn fabric. The undead employee shambled towards you, arms out, and a moan whistling through its rotting jaw.

“Five! Is that a zombie I hear? Tell me it isn’t.”

“It isn’t,” you lied as you stumbled back, hand reaching out for something. D-mnit, you didn’t bring your bat because you wanted your hands free. The store was supposed to be cleared. You turned in time to see another zombie on the other end of the aisle, blocking your escape. Its groans joined the first. “It’s two zombies.”

“Aw, man… it should have been empty. Can you run out of there?”

“Not really.”

Your fingers closed around a smooth, narrow shaft, and with little hesitation, you notched the arrow and aimed at the first zombie which was closest, elbow high. One of your eyes squeezed shut, and the head of the arrow buried itself in the zombies forehead with a solid thud. With no pause, you grabbed another arrow, swung around, and got the second zombie through the eye just as its hand brushed your arm.

When it crumbled to the ground like the first, you waited a moment longer, just in case, before you let your stance drop. Your breathing was loud in your ears, and as you sought to calm your heart back down, your ears tuned back into Sam’s frantic voice.

“–VE! Answer me, d-mnit! What’s going on?! Are you all right?”

You blinked and let out a shaky breath. Slumped against the wall, you said, “I’m fine, Sam. I took care of them.”

“Thank G-d,” he breathed. “Don’t go quiet on me like that again. Not like that. I was worried.”

“Sorry, Sam. I’ll make it up to you.”

“You better.”

The twitching of the zombies’ bodies stilled, and you gingerly padded over to the first one, planting a shoe on its jaw. Wrapping a hand around the arrow, you yanked it out with a nauseating squelch. The tip was red and wet, but you figured you could wipe it down easily enough. You retrieved the second one similarly. Honestly, this wasn’t the first time you found yourself thankful since the outbreak for that summer at camp. Even you couldn’t miss with targets that close.

You left the shop minutes later with the cricket bat you had come for and some other useful supplies but not before snagging a thin book off one of the shelves that caught your eye.

“I’m heading back, Sam.”

“Good. You owe me a Curly Wurly for my troubles.”

“Fine.”

—

“Runner Five, I thought I had ordered you to be taken off the roster for at least a week,” Maxine’s disapproving voice said through your headset.

You grimaced from where you were hunkered down behind a low wall at the edge of someone’s old yard. Dirt was working its way under your nails as your fingers burrowed into the wilted grass. The sound of the undead surrounding your hiding spot was almost deafening. You needed Sam right now, not a lecture.

“Now’s not the best time, doc,” you hissed into your mic, peeking over the faded bricks before ducking back down.

“You wouldn’t be in this situation if you had listened to me.”

“That’s fair but still not the time.”

“Maxie!” You could hear Sam’s muffled yell through the headset. There was a scuffling sound before his voice became much clearer. “How many times–Runner Five! What the h-ll?! I was only gone for three minutes. How did you end up surrounded by–what is it? At least, thirty zombies! Five!”

“Luck?”

He sighed, and a strained smile flashed across your face. You were certain that was a sigh reserved only for you.

“You’re giving me grey hairs, Five. I’m gonna get you out of there, and then we’re gonna have words.”

“Get me out, and you can have a whole dictionary.”

“Right. To your left, there’s a break between those two houses, the blue and green one. Head for it. You won’t be able to avoid catching some of the zombies’ attention, but you should be able to lose most of them if you are quick. Go. Now!”

You sprang up and made a dash for the gap Sam had pointed out. From the way the groans got even louder behind you, you knew you had been spotted. No worry. You’d dealt with worse. Compared to what you and Sara usually got up to, this was a holiday.

“Five, things aren’t looking pretty anymore. Change of plans. Can you get into that house right there? The one with the broken window. Yes, that one. In you go. Yup! Be careful. Don’t cut yourself.”

Your shoes crunched over the broken glass on the tiled floor as you levered yourself down from the sill. You peered around, hands tight around the handle of the bat you had collected from a garage before getting trapped in the neighborhood. You couldn’t be certain that there were no zombies waiting out of sight, ready to jump you if you let your guard down.

“If you can go out the front door, that street is a bit more deserted. It won’t be for long, so be quick.”

Your feet were nearly silent as you made your way out of the kitchen and into the living room, the room dim and musty. Expected when there was no one to dust. The smell of decay hit your nose, and you startled at the sight of a body on the couch.

Swinging around, you had your bat at the ready. It took a moment to register that the body’s head was caved in and slumped into the cushions. It didn’t look fresh. The blood had dried into a dark stain with clumps of hair in it. Someone else had already taken care of the zombie–if it had been one. Humans still killed humans despite the apocalypse.

“I don’t see you on my cameras, Five. What’s taking you so long? Your way out is getting more crowded by the second.”

“There’s a body. Dead.”

“Dead dead or about to bite you and make you one of them dead?”

“…dead dead.”

“One less thing to worry about… what is it, Maxine?” You heard a muffled voice. “What do you mean Five is supposed to be off running duty? Their name was… Five? What did you do?”

“Runner Six was feeling sick, so I covered for her.”

“Five…”

Your eyes perused the shelves out of habit, looking for anything an Abel resident might like. Wait…

You pulled down a DVD case and popped open the cover.

“Woah…”

“What is it?”

You snapped it shut, the plastic making a dull clicking sound. Looking back at the shelves, you grinned.

“Nothing. I’m coming out.”

You ran out into the horde a moment later and trusted Sam to get you home but not before a few more things made their home in your bag.

—

The gates rose before you, and you pedaled hard to clear them, riding under the spray of bullets that mowed down the zombies that had been on your tail. Residents looked up as you came to a smooth stop, a wild grin on your face that only died a little when you saw Maxine waiting for you with her arms crossed.

You held up your hands and waited for the klaxon of the lowering gate to go quiet.

“I swear, this time, I meant to help out in the kitchen, but Janine asked for me personally. I couldn’t say no, could I?”

“You could have, and you will,” Maxine said. “The guards have been informed that you’re not allowed to leave Abel for the next week, so don’t expect anyone to raise the gates for you–even if your name is on the roster.”

“Aw… Maxine…”

“Five.”

“I’m an Abel runner and an able runner,” you said, grinning when Maxine groaned. “If I can run, shouldn’t I?”

“If you overdo it, you won’t be able to run when we need you to.”

She frowned when you snickered at her unintentional pun. You sobered up (sans a small pout) and nodded.

“Fine. Doctor’s orders are doctor’s orders,“ you ceded, climbing off the bike. "I’ll be by the clinic for my bite check in a second. I just need to drop some things off. Scout’s honour.”

“I’m certain you’ve never been a scout.”

“Fine… runner’s honour.”

“You have honour now?”

You mock gasped as you walked away then went in search of Runner 16. You figured the bike was too big to hide, and too many people had seen you ride in on it, so you might as well deliver it to the runner now. The back tire was a bit flat, but it got you home safely. You were certain the runner would be able to fix it up, no problem.

Now, Sixteen didn’t cry per se, but you were certain his eyes looked a little misty as you passed him the bike. You awkwardly waved off his effusive gratitude and made an escape to your room that barely had any space left in it, digging through your supply bag and tossing some things onto your bed, which was about the only free space left at this point. The more people trusted a runner, the less likely their bag was taken from them the moment they got back to Abel and all the supplies stored away.

You had managed to get about the last few things you were looking for before Maxine took you off rotation. There was more you could have gotten, but this should suffice. Thankfully, no one checked the rooms regularly, or you would have gotten in trouble by now. It was worth it though. This was the best way you knew to express what you didn’t know how to in words.

You took the rest of the mostly full bag and stepped out of the cramped room. On the wall next to your “door”, where you had first missed it, a small, hand-written note was stuck to the wood. You peeled it off. At closer inspection, you realized it was a flyer for this year’s holiday party, hosted by Jack and Eugene. You’ve heard stories about past ones. You were almost surprised Janine would allow it (if the men indeed asked her permission), but you also knew she knew the importance of keeping up morale. She would most definitely regret it by the end of the night though.

Tucking the slip of paper away into your pocket, you adjusted the bag on your shoulders and jogged out of the runners’ quarters. You made sure to drop off the rest of the collected supplies and made a quick detour to the comm shack to return your headset. Then, you went to the clinic where Maxine was waiting for you.

—

Despite your best efforts, you did not manage to sneak out of the township for a run again. It was a long shot, but you tried anyways. The guards, however, were not willing to risk Maxine’s wrath, not when she had reign over the good stuff, like aspirin and plasters, so you were stuck helping out around the township. You took a shift in the kitchen almost every day and volunteered to read to the children at the school where they were working their way through the Harry Potter series.

Around the township, you could see the oncoming holiday season due to the collective efforts of Abel’s residents. There were festive decorations, found or made, hung up on or tacked onto different buildings. There was even a tree in the quad, small but brightly decorated. Simon had brought it in.

You breathed into your hands, having forgotten to wear your threadbare gloves before you started making your way to the clinic to help Maxine. There had been an accident with one of the construction efforts. No one was killed, but there were a few injuries that Maxine needed a few extra hands on. You liked to be useful. Plus, you hoped, if you put yourself in the good graces of everyone, you might be forgiven if you got caught tonight.

—

It was moments like this you wished you had an operator in your ear, preferably Sam, but you knew he would talk you out of this or get you both caught. You wouldn’t want to get him in trouble. Plus, he would probably spill everything.

It was risky being out past curfew. The consequences were severe because Janine and the Major enforced them, but it was also the best time to act if you wanted your plan to be a success. The only downside was that you had to keep making trips back to your room because everything was too much to carry at once. Each dash back to the runners’ quarters increased your chances of getting caught, but it was unavoidable. You were surprised you made it this far anyways. The apocalypse had trained everyone to be light sleepers, and you found yourself blending into shadows more often than not when a groggy individual swung first, opened their eyes later.

“Hey! Who’s there? Joe!”

You threw yourself down behind a woodpile as torchlight shone where you were just moments ago. With your back pressed against the wood, splinters embedding themselves into the fabric of your coat, you held your breath.

“I didn’t see anything, Pete.”

“I was certain… never mind. No one would be stupid enough to be out here now anyways.”

You bet your -rse there’d be someone stupid enough. Case in point: you. You smothered your anxious snicker before you could give yourself away.

Waiting with bated breath for the light to move on, you still waited moments more before you risked moving. You had only one more delivery to make anyways, but it would certainly be the riskiest, which is why you saved it for last.

The wall of Janine’s farmhouse loomed over you, and you questioned your sanity once more. You must be insane for even considering breaking into Janine’s home, let alone actually doing it, but here you were, pushing open a window you had made sure was unlocked earlier when you visited to drop of some files. You weren’t going to try anything fancy like getting into her room. You were stupid, not suicidal. The counter should do.

When you got the window open wide enough, you bent down to pick up the items you placed on the ground after you managed not to drop them on your way over. You straightened up…

Click.

…only to be face to face with the barrel of a rifle.

Sh-t.

“Runner Five, I do hope you have authorization to be out past curfew. Though, where you would have gotten that authorization, I don’t know, since I’m the only one who can grant it.”

“…Happy Christmas?” you squeaked, holding up your gifts with a shaky smile.

—

It smelled like death. You were ready to die. Your muscles shook as you hefted another shovelful of semi-frozen sh-t to add to the growing pile of semi-frozen sh-t in the wheelbarrow before driving the shovel back into the earth.

Latrine duty. You supposed it could have been worse. Janine could have been shot you or exiled you, or worse, taken you off running duty permanently. You shuddered at the thought then scratched your nose through the handkerchief that did little to block out the smell. At least, it wasn’t as bad as it was in the summer when the rain made it all wet and the sun made it smell to high heaven. As winter settled in, it only really hit you when you were ankle deep in it. You just hoped you wouldn’t smell like sh-t at the party tonight.

The intercom announced that it was time for breakfast right when your stomach growled, and you shucked the shovel to the side, peeling off and folding the work gloves before placing them on the shelf. You pulled on the new gloves you had traded a screwdriver for because it was getting too for your old ones to do any good. You would come back after you’ve eaten. You’ve been working since sunrise and deserved a break.

As you walked through Abel, towards the kitchen, you took a moment to observe the residents moving about around you. You could see lil’ Molly, walking hand-in-hand with Ed, clutching her old bunny which now bore a red knit hat and scarf. The tot fussed with it then babbled excitedly at her dad. They passed by Runner 16 who was standing with his new bike, gesturing wildly as he spoke with a big smile to Runner Six who was clutching a blue notebook and pen.

You hid a smile and joined the food queue to wait for your ration, listening to the conversations around you.

“I just woke up and found a Cluedo box in my room. Unopened. Do you know how rare that is? I don’t know…”

“…a Bible. A little worn and marked up, but it’s not missing any pages. When I saw it, I just started crying…”

“…new boots and pants. I’m almost embarrassed to ask who knew I needed…”

“It was only a pack, but I had just about forgotten what gum tastes like. You want one? I have…”

“…loose tea. I can finally have a decent cuppa. Just because the world ended…”

“Five?”

Your head jerked up, and you realized you were at the front of the queue. Some people were giving you weird or impatient looks, but you just grabbed a tray and worked your way down the table. There was a rare offering of hot chocolate at the end, and you took a cup. You wondered how the kitchen got their hands on hot chocolate mix and smirked to yourself as you inhaled the rich scent in the steam.

“Five! Over here!”

Sam waved widely at you from his spot at a table, his smile big under a red tinged nose. An orange knit hat shoved his bangs down over his eyes, and he brushed them aside to beam at you as you walked over to where he was sitting with Jody and Simon. Jody was hunched over yarn and knitting needles, having chosen to brave the cold it seemed rather than wear gloves that would hinder her work, while Simon seemed intent on inhaling his meal with no room for coming up for air.

“Five!” Sam exclaimed as you sat across from him. He was clutching a DVD case to his chest. “You wouldn’t believe it! An actually copy of Toy Story. No one’s been able to find one since the outbreak. It’s unbelievable. When I went to the comms shack this morning to check the equipment, the case was just laying on my desk–along with a jar of Marmite and a bat. Can you believe it?”

“Yeah,” Simon said between mouthfuls (or rather, with a mouthful). “I found a football in my room. Don’t know how it got there. It certainly wasn’t there when I turned in.”

Jody flashed him a disgusted look at his lack of table manners before she beamed at you.

“It looks like Abel’s got itself a Secret Santa. They got me yarn and needles, wool, a strander… just about everything I needed to keep knitting.”

“And a bow and arrows,” Sam added. "Which is–majorly cool.”

“Yeah,” Jody said with a blush. “I guess they must have heard me on Radio Abel. It’s sweet. They even got me a book on how to make my own supplies.”

You saw Janine queue up with Sara over Sam’s shoulder. The two women were conversing, and when one looked at you, the other turned too. Janine had a glare that you would swear was not as harsh as usual while Sara cocked a brow at you. You could see she was carrying a familiar, hardcover book.

You tried not to wheeze. She knew, didn’t she?

“Did you get anything, Five?” Sam asked.

“Huh?” you gasped, looking back at him. “Oh… I got new socks and these gloves,” you said, holding up your hands and wiggling your fingers. “Warm and cozy.”

“Do you think they’ll come out?”

“Who?”

“The Secret Santa.”

“I think if they had wanted credit, they wouldn’t have gone through so much trouble to avoid getting found out,” you said, sipping your hot chocolate when Sam squinted at you.

“I just don’t get how they did it,” Jody said.

“They’ve got to be a runner. Or working with one,” said Simon.

“No, that’s obvious. I meant how they delivered everything. What about curfew?”

“Maybe they got permission from Janine or got a guard to help them.”

“Or maybe they just didn’t get caught,” Sam added, an amused smile on his face as he shot a look at you.

Hah! You sipped your hot chocolate aggressively and almost choked as it burned your throat. You didn’t need this type of irony or suspicion in your life right now.

“And thank G-d for the hot chocolate.”

“Are you all going to the party later? If I heard correctly, Jack and Eugene got their hands on some booze, and I, for one, am thirsty,” said Simon.

“When aren’t you?”

Simon shot a glare at Jody then you for snickering.

“I should be back from my run on time,” Jody said. “Are you still grounded, Five?”

“Haha… yes…” You huffed. “Which means I’ll be around for it at least.”

“I’ve got a shift at the clinic today, so I’m free tonight,” Simon said.

The intercom came to life over their heads, calling all runners on duty today to retrieve their headsets and report to the gates for briefing.

“That’s my cue as well,” Sam said as Jody packed away her knitting.

“See ya, guys,” Jody said.

The two took their empty trays with them as you and Simon bid them good luck. You turned your focus to the rest of your meal, wanting to eat it all before it got too cold.

“So, did you get permission from Janine?”

“For what?” you asked around a banger halfway in your mouth.

“To sneak around past curfew.”

“…I don’t know what you mean. Oh, look at the time, I have to get back to latrine duty. See ya, Simon.”

Smooth.

—

“And let us make a toast to the Secret Santa that brought a little more needed cheer to our dreary existence this year!”

“Jack!”

“What? It’s true.”

“Doesn’t mean you have to say it. To our very Secret Santa who we are all very thankful for.”

The room cheered while Jack bickered back at Eugene. Jody accepted a cup from Simon and shifted over to let him sit.

“So, when are we going to tell Five that pretty much everyone knows it was them?” Simon asked.

Ed, who was nearby, snorted, and the two runners chuckled. They could see you by the wall with Sam, the two of you watching Jack and Eugene drunkenly joke off. You were clearly trying to hide a smile in your sleeve.

“What did Five get you, Ed?” Jody asked.

“Some old driving games,” Ed said over his cup. “I missed playing them. And they got Molly a hat and scarf for her rabbit. She adores them.”

“I don’t think we should tell them,” Jody decided.

“Why is that?” Simon asked.

“They clearly went through so much trouble to keep it a secret. I don’t think they’d want the attention.”

They saw you look up when Sam leaned over to say something to you, and you started sputtering, gesturing wildly in what looked like denial.

“So, what? We say nothing?”

“I know, the idea is new to you,” Jody teased, grinning at Simon’s offense, “but yeah. We all know. That’s good enough. Let’s let them think they got away with it.”

“All right. Here’s to ‘Secret’ Santas,” Simon said, raising his cup.

“And oblivious Fives.”

"I’ll drink to that,” Ed said.

“Hear, hear,” crowed those around them.

Jody snickered when the commotion caught your attention from across the room, but she wasn’t too worried. You weren’t the most perceptive, but, at least, your heart was always in the right place. She figured that was good enough.

[southsidelover]

⭐️ ⭐️ ⭐️ you know who they’re from 😉 and a bonus ⭐️ for dealers choice!

stars for our headcanons meme + @stormedchaos

Going to trim this beneath a cut for length!

CHANCE ENCOUNTERS - VERONICASummer humidity made everything, and everyone, just a little bit more wild. The Serpents doing, what Serpents would, small time dealing along the borders of the Southside, late nights left struck at Pop’s, the one place that hugged the edges of the train tracks, without discriminating the citizens on either side of them. Smoking cigarettes outside, cast beneath the neon glow of the sign as a car glided up alongside of her, a girl slipping from the back, a cape on, as if she were some macabre red riding hood as she glanced her way, full lips painted dark, her face wholly unfamiliar.For a moment, feeling that grace of what it was like to have the breath stolen right from her lungs, cheeks left flushed, cigarette ashing against her shoes. Not even registering the indignity of it as she walked on by her, unconscious of the way that she followed her with her eyes, with the unspoken ‘who are you’ on the tip of her tongue. A fascination that she knew not to show, swallowing thickly as the eyes of the older man behind the driver’s seat glared her way, kicking at the dirt with discomfort as she followed behind her, cigarette forgotten as she walked purposefully into the other girl, blinking back with her mouth forming an ‘oh’ of surprise, as if this weren’t all so perfectly engineered.“Oh shit, I’m so sorry–!” lying through her teeth, Toni’s fingers carving through her pink hair, squinting at her for a moment. “… you must be new here, right? Sorry, this is a small town, we kind of all know each other. I’m Toni. Toni Topaz.” the beginning of a story, that she hadn’t anticipated in the slightest. Skin so soft, hand shaken, casual conversation shared with her grasping at a grease stained paper bag, and Toni, arms crossed, explaining this town in bemused tones until she found in her the struggling confidence to ask her to take a tour with her on the back of her bike, the highlight, of this low life, all caught up within a single request.BEST FRIENDS, RIGHT? - FPHe’d always been there within her life. At six, he was there at her birthday party, remembering the distinctive raggedness of him, leaning against the cheap formica countertop in their home, the crispness of his leather jacket. And Toni left, staring up, offering a piece of cake as her father placed a hand at the back of her head and told her to give them space so that he could talk with his best friend. Right, right, she understood that concept, a toothy grin and she was gone, flitting back amongst the other Southside children, sugar hyping up her soul.At twelve, he was there in the court room at her side, her face drawn impassive and cold as the sentencing was announced out loud, each ‘guilty’ verdict making her almost throw up amongst the aisles. His hand holding hers, even as she felt lightheaded and ready to faint, barely hearing him as he whispered to her father across the bar, where she heard him make FP promise to take care of her as he was lead away, shackles and iron, all. Saying nothing as he pried her from her seat from the gallery, taking her to Pop’s to try and feed her a meal, solemn and too serious both, as she swallowed past the bites of food and asked, cooly, if he knew who was the first foster family on the roster. It took her until she was sixteen to get a job at the Whyte Wrym, knowing she shouldn’t, but knowing too that FP leaned hard to get it for her. Not quite expecting to be the one that soon took care of him, too, recognizing the broken pieces within the man that tried to find his answers at the bottom of a bottle, learning first hand what alcoholism was like as a disease as she dragged his heavy form backwards to his trailer, emptied, on the nights he drank too much. Charting his highs, his lows, the good and the bad of him home life in the number of beer bottles he’d order from her. Asked one night why she tried, and she could only laugh, glancing his way with a tiny shrug of her shoulders, as best as she could muster. “… dad probably wanted us to take care of each other, is why.” GOOD MORNING - JUGHEADShe didn’t want to come back here in those ugly moments; when there was a door that locked up too ready, when she’d cleared through the awkward feelings with Betty well enough to play the good friend instead. Nervousness settling within the pit of her stomach when she knocked, holding up a plastic bag, an SNES and a copy of Mortal Kombat 3, she laughed when asking if he didn’t mind following up on that ‘my trailer is your trailer’ comment he’d made over breakfast. That last time they’d ever talked about anything around herself, considering that good enough for now, slipping by him at the nod of confirmation, setting up within his living room.Yellowing controllers in hand, a plastic bottle of pop between the both of them to split. The midi-influenced sounds tinkling between them, wondering if they’d ever sleep, hyped up on sugar, on glowing greatness on the screen, on that smile on his face that she hadn’t seen in ages. Figuring now was a better time than any other offered up to ask, “How’re things?” to gently lead into the fact that she knew, and it was good for him because he deserved the kind of happiness that he found in her. “She’s something all right. More like her mom then she probably knows.”Laughing at the shutter from him, but continuing on, anyways, her eyes gluing themselves to the screen and the colour that flashed over it in vivid detailing. “But forreal, it’s… good. She evens you out, you know? I guess I was wrong about all that stuff about her leaving and… that’s good. You’re a good person, Jughead. You deserve good people around you.” knowing well enough that she, that Sweet Pea, and that all of them, really, were not quite the good people required to guide him and the person he was, who he wanted to be. FOR FREE? - ALICELean like a whip, she looked angry within each picture she found within her old house. Just like FP, another friend, another woman who used to stand by the teenaged faces of her parents. The woman that they could only speak of with a note of distain in their voices that they could never quite iron out, despite all efforts. She used to be amazing. A real fucking rattlesnake, they’d drink, reminisce, about their old crew, the friends that they’d been at the time. Nothing like the woman who now posted her portrait beneath her byline, her features like a hawk, her words always angry, harsh, stomping down upon the place that she hailed from.Toni never saw her in the flesh, save those sideways glances when shopping for food. In person she always seemed tired, weighted down by two children, a husband with a list for everything. Not at all like the woman in her torn leggings in the photographs, but perhaps there was a reason for that. Dressed up in gaudy jewelry and colours that didn’t suit her, “She looks better in black and green.” she’d confide to her mother, which would always earn her a laugh and a pat on the top of her head.And seeing her in the flesh, campaigning against the scourge of the South, only filled her with a sense of shame for the woman that she’d once been. Seeing in her the cost of what it was to chase the dream of a better life, how it forced a person into disavowing all that once was the world. Knowing that there was nothing free in this world, and in seeing Alice Cooper, seeing the cost of her Northsider life, her Northsider husband, and her little slice of the American dream