#he's just an amalgamation of so many things i've already done

[deadbeat-motel]

ᑕᕼEᖇᖇIᗷOᗰᗷ ᗩᑎᗪ ᔕIᖇᑭEᑎTIOᑌᔕ ᖇEᗪEᔕIGᑎ

The last two designs for the main cast. With these two done, I can finally work on miscellaneous characters that I've been eyeing the most.

Again, thoughts below the cut:

My issues with their Original designs:

Sir Pentious:

I thought I would only have one thing to say about him (the unnecessary eyes) since he was my favorite in the entire original cast but having taken a closer look at him for this, I saw a lot of things that bothers me.

Too many eyes. specifically the lower half of his body has too many eyes and it seems detrimental to him. It's kind of painful to think about it since I do not think we ever see those eyes close. Is he just slithering on the ground with those exposed eyes? That's got to be irritating at best and damaged at worst as he continuously slithers on them.

There are eyes on the bowtie and the hat? There are already 4 extra eyes on his hood, so why have even more? I get that the original Pentious design was basically a monsterous amalgamation of eyes but the eye thing could have been scrapped altogether.

While his palette was the least red out of the cast (More so composed of yellows), it still blends in with the rest of the reds.

The claws are an unnecessary repeating design trait (Alastor and Vox notably have them too). I don't think it would've been too big of a difference to just keep his fingers fully black.

The stripes on his suit are too thick. It's called pinstripes for a reason.

I don't like how the hat is shaped to fit the head, It's awkward.

not a point, but I just wanted to say how the blue color palette works really well with him in that last episode.

CherriBomb:

She's not that bad of a design (She's sort of bland in my opinion) but it's the little small details about her that makes her so simple and also so complicated at the same time. There are so many batches of freckles scattered everywhere, little explosion lines on her skirt as well as the X on her chest, the tattoos are a jamble of random loops and bombs, and her tattering doesn't have an easy shape to consistently draw.

The thought process for these two:

Mx. Pentious:

Pentious goes by both Sir/Miss/Mx. but uses she/they pronouns.

Minimized the actual amount of eyes on her, I kept it only to her actual eyes and those on her hood.

Gave her a butterfly-shaped hood. It's nothing deep since it stems from the fact the notches in Sir Pentious' hood almost looked like one to my bad eyesight. I decided to play more into that idea.

I read some posts where people talk about how Sir Pentious should have a snout and while I understand why and fully support people giving him one, I really didn't want to add the snout to this design. It drove me crazy since I'm not a big fan of it. I tried a compromise where her head was shaped more like Phineas.

Kept the tophat but removed its eye and mouth. If I remember correctly, Viv took that from one of her co-workers from the pilot. I decided to just have it as a regular tophat.

It doesn't have all the colors, but her design does have the Neptunic flag.

I'm not sure if this even is a real snake but I based Mx. Pentious' design on this:

CherriBomb:

Scraped most of her features in exchange for a sukeban theme. I personally have zero knowledge about the punk scene in Australia.

A majority of the suggestions I received for her rough draft had something to do with the skirt. I elongated it and gave it a slit in which the magenta from the inside is able to pop out.

Thought it would be a cute detail to have her hair explode if she's angry.

----

Apologies this took too long to be posted, Life got in the way as well as the fact I was feeling shitty about Pentious' first draft. Her skin was an awkward and ugly shade of green and seeing some posts critical of Pentious' design got me to think a little bit more about what direction I'd like to move her redesign.

You could see this in the earlier rough sketches but this was how Pentious' first redesign looked like

[bonnieisaway]

BIG BOY spoilers for season 5 but I really wanna talk about how brilliant episode 1 is (I just woke up and I'm not in the fuzzy headspace I was yesterday)

Off the bat also I do wanna mention the art style is changing again a little! It's a bit different from season four so far. I really like the way it's looking though. Seven looks fucking GOOD in so many of these scenes

Anyways it took me an EMBARASSING four fucking minutes to realize that 1) this was not really happening irl and 2) that the dome was supposed to represent Seven's headspace

anyways The place they're standing in at the start is really interesting to me. They're on Chicken Island obviously but it's Chicken Island in Seven's head. And the way it is in his head is it's foggy, cloudy, and absolutely deserted. I mean there's already not many people on Chicken Island, but it's like dead empty. Much like this scene from the s3 outro:

(didn't know this ED had twenty fucking variations of this scene now jesus christ)

It also feels like it's littered with a lot of references from past episodes. The ducky floatie feels like a reference to the episode where we met DaChun in season 1, the coconut Hua's messing with feels like a reference to that as well, this all feels very reminiscent of invading Captain Jack's ship, the episode even starts with the "First mission" title card, which the show doesn't really use anymore. There's a lot of like, old references in here that all seem kind of tainted and dulled by this grayed out, melancholic perception of Chicken Island.

The second I saw this I instantly thought of the scene from season 3:

I just I dunno I really really like this. I like how they chose to represent his mindscape and the references to the past experiences he can remember.

And I also really like how the different levels represented the different poisons in his body. The first being a puzzle about Manjusaka, the second about the Dark Frost blade

(which also: there are random figures hidden in the ice in this scene that made me tweak out.

is that fucking blackbird? who the fuck are you)

I love how the wolf is drawn and reflects the exact effects of the blade. The animalistic, heightened senses, the fact it's not inherently an evil entity, it's capable of being nice, it's just got heightened aggression it can barely control. Anyway and then the fucking final layer.

Literally the exact spot he once stood in.

And the fucking. The thing that fights him. That tries so hard to stop him from opening the door. It's not just himself, it's a fucking amalgamation of every reason why he shouldn't, why he originally did this to himself: the Shadow killers, faces we don't even recognize, the girl in white, faces we'll probably never see again but that will haunt some deep corner of him, and it's himself. and it's not the thousand demon daggers that kills it, it's just the girl in white's blade. Her dinky little run of the mill sword.

I think it's really, really important that the "past him" asks: If you could've done this too, wouldn't you? Wouldn't you have run away? You would've wanted a new life too. Don't do this again. Don't do this to me.

I started this season worried we were gonna hard pivot at "oh, Seven and the past Seven are two different people" but they're not and this, to me, clearly illustrates that they're not. He wanted this. He wanted this life to end. He wanted to run away, he didn't want this life, exactly like I've been saying since fucking season 3. He wasn't a ruthless, cold hearted killer, at his core he was a child who did what he needed to. He only fought on missions, he was told directly to kill Stanians on sight, but he wanted to be empathetic, he wanted to care so badly, and he wanted to protect somebody. The FIRST fucking time he EVER gets to directly, blatantly, and loudly protect somebody he even MILDLY cares about, it's enough to convince him to never want to do this again. And now with the added context that the Thousand Demon Daggers was slowly killing him - he didn't just fight some demon and won but he signed his fucking life over and was bound to this sword that was ripping him apart, he wanted to leave so badly, and the only way he did was in a way that almost killed him anyways. Episode 2 made me afraid too, because of the way the flashback controlled him, but ultimately, he's already had these flashbacks THE ENTIRE SHOW. These have happened to him before, but now they're so much louder, they're overwhelming and powerful, he's conscious but he's not, he doesn't know how to stop, sometimes he doesn't even actually know where he is. He's not being 'possessed' by somebody else or something, he is somebody riddled with PTSD taken over by those memories.

I also really wanna know what it is 'Seven' is saying here. His mouth is obviously moving like he's speaking but there's no audio or captions to it, (Netflix if you love me you'll give me something good god,) but it looks like Seven doesn't know what he's saying here either. and I just really really really wanna know. This is going to become my new "what was in the letter."

Anyways feel free to pile on more thoughts cus thats all I have right now. I ran into this season (foolishly) (once again) praying I'd get end game Seven x Thirteen but it seems I will spend the duration of season 5 in the trenches, fighting for my life, kicking and screaming, shitting my pants and sniffling, begging, "NOOOOO HE'S THE SAME PERSON HE WAS BEFORE!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!!!! THEY'RE NOT TWO DIFFERENT PEOPLE!!!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Thirteen save me, save me Thirteen, Thirteen, Thirteen save me.

[7grandmel]

Todays rip: 22/07/2023

Margaret Faces Herself

Season 6 No Album Release (Read More) Blue Lady - Last Window: The Secret of Cape West

Ripped by adumb

In running this blog, I try to keep a pretty even balance between a lot of things. Popular, unpopular, genuinely excellent music, hysterical punchline, and so forth. Part of that balance, too, is in highlighting rips that mean a lot to me, versus their impact on the channel as a whole. But today, I really want to be self indulgent.

I think one of the absolute coolest things about SiIva being this amalgamation of different creators' visions is that everyone's love gets to shine through in different ways. It reminds me a lot of something like the r/place canvas - this vast field of everyone's passions spread about everywhere, some loudly, and some more subtly. I've already described how much music I've only found out about through being used on the channel, and that sentiment also extends to games. But to me, it swings the other way too: It warms my heart beyond belief to see niche games that I love get attention by the SiIva team.

A rip like todays is still sitting at just barely over 5K views with no album release, in large part due to being a rip of a very obscure Nintendo DS adventure game. Last Window has comfortably been sitting in my personal list of favorite games for a very long time, and it makes all fan content you find that much sweeter when you know just how uncommon it truly is. Because of that, and due to the general excellence of the rip itself, this track has been sitting in my YouTube playlists since it first released.

The two Kyle Hyde games just have this type of sound that's so unique to them, a kind of lounge-y jazz that's coated in DS-flavored marinade, that makes any song rendered in their style just pop. Though I lack the emotional attachment to the Persona 4 song used in this mashup, it fits the Last Window instrumentation like an absolute glove and highlights the emotion of both tracks simultaneously.

My perception of adumb's rips is very much like what this rip in particular means to me - his track record gives off the feeling that he's doing this as a fun way to show as much love as possible to the media he loves. I can talk all day about the quality and excellence of rips with 50 different jokes and visual elements, but...showing that love is so important, no matter how its done, or how many people you target it toward.

[bluecatwriter]

jonmina, holward (if you have done them already, helward)

Joke's on you, I'm answering all three because no one can stop me! :D JonMina (Jonathan Harker/Mina Harker)— HECK YEAH! 1. What made you ship it? Jonathan and Mina embody a whole bunch of tropes I absolutely love— childhood friends-turned-lovers, young married couple facing The Horrors, a very stable, respectful, and loving relationship that's mostly buffeted by outside forces, etc. I was in love with them even before I met Mina in the story. 2. What are your favorite things about the ship? I'm a really big fan of romantic partners who are genuinely best friends and deeply in love, looking out for each other as they face conflict together. I'll admit a lot of this is a sort of self-insert enjoyment: my spouse and I have been married ten years but are frequently mistaken for newlyweds because we're super annoying affectionate. I love angst and conflict as much as the next person, but sometimes I just want a couple whose love is one of the great stabilizing forces in the story, and I adore Jonathan and Mina for that.   3. Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship? Jonathan avoiding the oath to kill Mina and vowing instead to follow her into vampire hell instead is incredibly romantic (and hot as hell), but I don't see it as an unqualified good decision, and in fact see it as one of the few times he won't respect Mina's choice in a situation. It's pretty much the only decision Jonathan is capable of making at that point, given what he's been through and how he feels— but it still denies Mina's agency in the situation, which makes for an interesting tension. I think that tension makes their relationship even more compelling! Holward (Arthur Holmwood/Jack Seward)— Yup! 1. What made you ship it? I always thought their friendship was sweet (I'm a sucker for dudes comforting other dudes when they're crying, even if it's just a repressed manly squeeze on the shoulder like Jack manages at Lucy's funeral), but it wasn't until I wrote a fic about them (Words and Voice Fail Me) that I came to appreciate their romantic potential. 2. What are your favorite things about the ship? They're a classic sunshiny-golden-retriever paired with a sullen-wet-cat dynamic, which is always fun, but on a more serious note they're just complementary in many ways: Arthur tends not to overthink things while Jack runs in mental circles all the time, Arthur's used to abundance while Jack is in more of a scarcity mindset, and Arthur is very emotionally open while Jack is repressed. But sometimes Arthur really does need to think more carefully, not assume that everything will go his way, and keep his emotions in check a bit more, so Jack is helpful for him, too. They're a good match. I think they're sweet. 3. Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship? I honestly don't know enough fandom discourse to know which opinions are controversial. ;) Helward (Abraham Van Helsing/Jack Seward)— OH YES 1. What made you ship it? A vast amalgam of Tumblr posts, plus reading the text itself. This is one of those ships that feels absolutely canon to me— any version of the story without Jack and Van Helsing at least pining for each other feels like an AU at this point.  2. What are your favorite things about the ship? There are so many different ways to write/headcanon it! There are tons of potential obstacles between them— whether Van Helsing's marriage, the age gap, the former student/teacher dynamic, the internalized homophobia, you name it— and so many different possibilities for how their relationship can play out. It seems that no matter which way it goes, there's always a lot of delicious tension and pining and angst.  3. Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship? I've never seen a version of Helward that I didn't like in some way, so I think my opinions are pretty mainstream… considering that there's, like, seven of us who ship it in the first place. ;)

[leaky-pen]

Ok this was requested so here i am going wild:

First of all. The names for all of them are so perfect . I am a huge lover of puns and just funny sounding words in general so all of these have amused me so much.

I also adore how silly some of these are. I feel like compared to pokemon these are allowed to just be silly/goofy. Like yeah we've got silly pokemon but these just hit different.

Also sorry this took so long i kept getting distracted

So let's just do this in order ig.

Fondude: Literally love its expression. that is such a lil guy who is up to some mischief. You will probably hear this so many times i'll sound like a broken record by the end but it's name is also just so immensely entertaining to me. It do be a lil cheesy dude. The smile is so funny to me it looks like it would jaywalk.

Fonduo. I told you it looked it wold commit crimes and now it has. Also the name. So simple yet so perfect again. Its now two of em so its a duo. The way one of em is just stabbing the other? Kinda morbid but in the funny way. Like yes ur honor my client may have murdered a man but in his defense it was funny. And the expression on the stabbed one is so funny to me. Maybe i just suck at reading facial expressions( i mean i do) but he doesnt even seem in pain as much as just inconvenienced.

Meltitude: why do i love all of these names so much i am so easily amused. I've always had a soft spot for designs that are just a bunch of smaller things horribly fused. maybe it's just cuz i;m a fan of body horror but even in the most cartoony forms it never fails to satisfy me. Amalgamations from Undertale and that one enemy from Diablo 3 my beloveds. Love how it still has the hat but its now way too small for the creature as a whole. And is that the two little prongs of the fork sticking out? Has it just been near completely absorbed? Cuz that's great if so. Also looks incredibly deadly but that might be the lactose intolerance speaking.

Dubberuck. The name. That honking name. It is so fun to say out loud. That is like peak vocal stim material right there. It is such an amusing set of syllables. And look at it. Its a lil rubber ducky. With 2 heads. I love it. This thing is a peak lifeform. I want one irl.

Kadayadak: Aaaaa! The name is a palindrome! And it's design is the visual equivalent of a palindrome! And it's still a ducky!!! I wonder if this thing is big enough to ride on...? I want one of these as well i am literally on love. Its so cute!

Bubeloon: This thing. This adorable goofy lil thing. I love it's face so much. Look at its mouth. I can practically hear the goofy noise it seems to be making. And it's a lil pufferfish! Also kinda looks like one of those sea mines which i think is intentional? But yeah those mines kinda look like underwater balloons which fits with the name. Either way i think its positively adorkable. I love its sharp lil teeth.

Zeppeloon: Another name i love. I mean i just like the way zeppelin sounds already so makes sense i would like this as well. And i simply adore the concept of something like blimp being mashed with a wale and i'm surprised i haven't seen it done yet. I mean blimps are just like sky wales huh? Both are massive and float around in their respective environment.

Isopo?e: I actually cannot read what that one letter is.. uh that's on me i don't do well w anything other than typed text. But this thing. I want a line of fruit snacks shaped like it because that sounds like an untapped market. This thing is so cute. It is a lil isopod! it's just round and adorable. Idk what the size of it would be but i wanna be the kind of villain that spins around in my chair to face the hero but instead of a cat i'm just petting one of those things in my lap. I know we already have an isopod pokemon(and i adore it) but listen i love isopods and you can never have enough funny lil creatures. This thing is so round and friend shaped.

Kaisopod: I actually really like this thing. Like i cannot pinpoint what exactly it is that draws me to it other than my love of isopods but this is probs one of my favs from all of these. I love all of the legs. If this thing was big enough to ride on like a horse i want one. But i can also picture one being like moderately sized and you look out of your window at night just to see a huge gathering of them just scuttling across the empty streets. Would be really cool but also kinda spooky i bet. But like it an epic way.

Inseparapod: maybe its just cuz im in my splatoon era(yeah if the shiver pfp didnt clue ya in already) but i love octopi. They are genuinely such cool animals. And look at these lil things. And the as always the name is so good.

Octangle: Another top tier name and it feels like such a natural progression from the previous phase. If i was playing a game with these and my Inseperapod evolved into this i would genuinely laugh out loud. It is so funny. I would name it linguini and cherish it forever.

Uturnip: took me embarrassingly long to get the joke but i love this thing. Look at it scamper. I love this li thing. And not something i would EVER think to design. Its so novel and fun. And i love the way it was executed its so cute.

Daicone: Another concept i would never think of in a million years but still works. I love its lil face its got such big eyes. I don't have much to say like it just works.

Mareenghareta: I don't think i spelt that right but i'm too lazy to go double check. Anyway. Pizza fish?? Pizza fish. I love this thing. This would be another thing i want a plush of. Look at its silly little face. I ADORE this thing.

Tropizza: Not to be that person but pineapple does NOT belong on pizza. But i will make an exception for this guy as he is adorable. I love the shape/silhouette of it with the pineapple tail.

Dabberonni: I can confirm that i WOULD die for this thing. It would make such an epic blanket design btw. Anyway just like. Look at this thing. It's one of my favorites out of all of these stunning designs. I literally love its face. I could stare at this thing for hours.

Ok split this up so tumblr would stop yelling at me cuz of the however many character limit per block thing ig

Counterpillar: took me a second to try and guess what the concept was but i think its one of those lil thin things with all the discs on it you use to count with? like a single row of an abacus? I'm not fully sure still. If that is the design tho i love it. Might just be my love of the way bugs look talking again but this thing is so cute. Its so simple but so well executed.

Fortoon: i always had a love for cocoon shaped pokemon just because the idea of them were always hilarious. And this thing is all that and more. It is 5 steps above what metapod could ever be. It's a lil dice!! its a cube!!! Its so adorable

Blufferfly: took me a second to get the name cuz im a lil stupid but once i did i was in love. This is probably another one of my favorites. Its so simple but so wonderful. Its a butterfly with cards for wings. Its just that but it works SO unbelievably well. Its design just resonates with me like its so good. I dont even know what to say like i just love it.

Coboom: the first one i don't quite grasp. Still think its funny looking. I like it :)

Cocoboom: Explosives are just inherently funny. Have you ever seen cartoons? And this ones a pun so +100 points.

Combat: this was the only one that made me actually laugh out loud when i saw it. Like yeah some of the others were really amusing but this one made me straight up spit tea on my laptop screen. It is just so unbelievably amusing to me. Combat. Combat bat. Its just a bat with boxing gloves on. Funniest thing ive ever seen.

Upperkite: Its also really good. I know i say this for all of em but the names are so good. Its got more arms no which equals more punching. Which is great.

Elasteal: I love this thing. Its little face is full of such kindness.

Sealastic: Another one of my favorites. I just don't even know how to explain it but it fills me with such joy. It looks like a gummy worm ad i love it for that.

Crustatic: Another anther favorite. This thing is easily top 3. I love it so much design wise. Like i just love it so much i don't even have words its so good. I want to hand it sticks and watch it break them. I hope it will be my new best friend. I want to pick it up and hug it. I will feed it treats and love it forever.

Squeep: Do i even need to say anything? In a word: Squeep. But fr this thing is so amusing. I don't even know what squeep means but like yeah it sure is a squeep. I love it.

So yeah basically i was not kidding when i said the tags would have been a mile long if i wrote it all out. And yeah basically i literally love all of these so much. Thank you so much op for blessing my eyes with these.

okay so fun fact several months back i was brainstorming a game concept (basically: a pokémon clone, but with sillier types like cheese type or bone type, and battles are more like earthbound style, being up to 4v4 by default. also the creatures are called jankies (singular janky)) and designed a bunch of them together with a friend

our magnum opus is this one

[i-sveikata]

19 & 17 for the fanfic writer asks, pls and thank youuuuu! If those do not spark joy for any reason or if you've already done them, feel free to swap them for something else!

ooooh thanks angel! i'll give both of them a crack! :D

19. what are some books or authors that influenced your style the most?

Hmmm this is a very good question! i'm sure im probably an amalgamation of so many different influences tbh because i read A LOT but if i was going off authors where i've read a book or series and been like, damn i want to create something like this, then i would say:

Megan Whalen Turner (The Thief series), Kristen Cashore (Graceling Realm), Bridget Collins (The Binding), Marie Lu (Legend Series), Emily Rodda (Deltora Quest series) C.S Pacat (Captive Prince Series, Dark Rise), Madeline Miller (the Song of Achilles), V.E Schwab (Villains Series) & Nora Sakavic (All for the Game series).

I'll stop there otherwise i'll go on forever lol. (kind of honourable not-mention would be JK for the Harry Potter series too but since she's a TERF and genuinely behaving horribly i'm discounting her, the credit there would mostly be for building a love of reading as a young kid which arguably i could also credit to Emily Rodda, Ali Sparkes, Scott Westerfeld, Rick Riordan, R.L Stine, Meg Cabot, Suzanne Collins, Janet Austen etc) also kind of proud most of these are women tbh.

17. what is your favorite line you’ve ever written?

omg hahahahahahaha well first thing you should know about me is that i have a pretty atrocious memory lol so I really wouldn't know one off the top of my head unless of course i was rereading that story. That's not to say i haven't had moments where i've written a line or a description and have been like damn that sentence fucks lol so I'd know it when i see it? Sorry that's such a non-answer!

There's a line from my current original work that i really, really like but i'm writing that in the hopes of publishing eventually so i won't put it here that for obvious reasons. (sorry again that's such a tease)

But what I will give is a line from a current Vegas/Pete fic i'm in the middle of, which isn't really a spoiler since nobody will understand the context:

“Maybe,” he agrees, just to spite Vegas with the possibility. “But I guess you’ll never know.”

i wouldn't say it's my favourite line in the fic but it's one i certainly enjoyed writing ;)

thanks for the asks!!!!

[ddejavvu]

Hey I have this Eddie idea! Maybe lame but yknow how guitar players tend to have calloused fingers/hands? Let's say his gf went to watch corroded coffin perfom & it was his best yet; Eds just totally shredding on that guitar causing the calluses to bust open & bleed :( do ya think u could write something abt the reader patching his hands/fingers up after his show?? I imagine him bein totally hyped up on adrenaline like "whoa babe did you SEE THAT?!" while also bein a very needy & lovesick boy 🥺

cont: Continuing off that last part, Eddie just becomes so enthralled at the idea of someone nurturing and loving him so much while his gf patches him up. Sorry i couldn't fit the entire idea on one post but yeah. I've often thought about Eddie's possible musical injuries haha 😄

i'd literally give up my sense of taste to be able to patch him up after a concert.

--

Nothing pumps eddie with adrenaline more than performing. Something about the dingy bar lighting, the sticky floor beneath his boots, and the amalgamation of drunk middle aged men and his closest friends cheering him on has energy racing through him.

That's why it's so difficult to corral him so that you can fix the busted callouses on his fingers. He obviously isn't able to play with bandages on his fingers, he tells you very emphatically that they wouldn't be good for shredding, so they have to be administered after the show, when the damage has already been done.

"-you see that?! Like, that had to be the best show we've ever done. I was- man I was killing it! The guy in front of me was filming." He reminds you proudly, as if the camcorder hadn't been in your line of sight the entire time he'd been using it to record the performance, "I think he's a scout or something. He's gonna send it to a producer, 'make us big."

"I'll have to tour with you," You hum, fingers wrapping one of Eddie's own with a plain brown bandage, "You'll need a medic for after your solos."

Eddie's brows furrow, and he glances down at your hands, suddenly aware of your touch. He realizes with a start that he's bleeding, too busy rambling before to feel the sting of his cuts.

"Oh shit," He mumbles, staring at the bandage on his pointer finger. You reach for his middle, crouched by his feet to have a better view of his injuries.

"'Must've busted when I was playing," He hums, brain still whirring with excitement.

You nod, humming in agreement, "Probably. Unless you were playing with a cactus I didn't see?"

"Yeah, it's back there," He gestures to a corner of the room that you know full well does not have a cactus in it, giggling softly as you squint at his blister. You're making sure that no residual blood is left on the skin, the cotton ball in your hand stained a murky crimson, when you feel Eddie's lips against your temple, his neck craned down to reach you.

"Thanks for patching me up," He murmurs, his voice soft against your skin.

You preen under his affection, eyes scrunching in a smile as you nod, "Mhm. Can't let you drive with bloody hands."

"'Sounds kinda metal," He muses, and you know he's joking, that he won't actually smear blood over his steering wheel. Still, you jerk your head towards his guitar, the thin strings tinged red.

"I think that's just about the most metal thing you could have." You finish dabbing away at his blood, wrapping one last bandage around his cut, "You'll have to leave it all bloody and sell it when you get big."

"No way." He shakes his head, curls flying, "I'd never sell it."

"Why not?"

You're expecting a rant about his sweetheart, how he could never bear to part with the guitar that had carried him through so many shows. But he surges his head forwards, eyes narrowed in an incredulous stare, "Uh, 'cause then someone could clone me?"

[fancybehaviour]

Daddy Woes

Summary:

Harry is a good husband; so he sends his wife out on a much needed girls day. James Sirius is a naughty boy; so he sends his father down an anxiety spiral.

Notes:

Written for @harryandginuary BINGO!

Prompt I 23: “Why are there zucchini all over our kitchen?” “Do you not like zucchini?”

The sun had sunk low on the horizon, and in a few minutes would dissapear for the night. About dinner time, thought Ginny, as she made her way home after a long enjoyable day, her heels clicking rhythmically against the cobble. As she walked, she rewinded the highlights of her girls day out with Hermione and Luna in her head. Ginny had had an absolute hoot meeting her friends.She was sure she would continue to reminisce until the next time she could have such a day; after all being the mother of a seven month old meant that such trips were a rarity and she cherished them a lot.

Her legs ached from all the walking around she did while she helped Luna shop for her trip and she was looking forward to taking the nice long bath her husband had promised to draw her. She let out a sigh as she thought of sinking her aching legs in a hot bath, her husband perched at the edge of her bathtub as she gave him an exaggerated recount of the day's events peppered with silly nonsensical jokes, him guffawing at them all even though he had already heard them all. He did that a lot these days, laughing. Especially since the birth of their beautiful boy.

She felt a swell of love rise in her as she thought of her family; her seven month old baby son who could scream the house down and her loving husband who tried his best to give her respite from the said infant. 

"Harry?" she called, pushing the front door to close and locking it. "James darling? I'm back home. Did you boys have fun?". She continued heading towards the kitchen where she could hear noises, taking care not to trip over the many toys that were strewn about their living room. Courtesy of their many relatives and friends, James seemed to have an amount of toys that seemed absolutely ridiculous to Ginny who couldn't remember seeing so many toys even at the Burrow, that had been the residence of seven children. Making the matter even more ridiculous was the fact that James's favourite toys were actually the copper pots and pans that he liked to bang about making noise.

It was only when she reached the kitchen and took in the desecration that it was  that she realised that perhaps today, she might be the only one in the Potter household who might have had any semblance of fun.

Eyes darting from her slightly whimpering son in his high chair, to the trail of food spills surrounding him to the multicoloured stains adorning her husband's apron and his miserable face, she decided to address a whole other issue: “Why are there zucchini all over our kitchen?” 

“Do you not like zucchini?”, asked Harry, in a tone that might have been wry if it weren't for the long suffering expression on his face.

"Absolutely not. Can't believe you thought I did, the honor of questionable taste will forever be Hermione's ."

He gave a laugh that seemed more for her benefit (making Ginny wonder if parenthood had done a number on her humour too) and set about cleaning up. Ginny walked into the kitchen and lifted the whimpering toddler into her arms. She pressed a loud smacking kiss on both of his chubby, chubby cheeks, and rocked him gently, seemingly this was all that was needed for his whimpers seemed to slowly subside. She could feel Harry's eyes on them as he continued to clean up the mess; she remained silent, waiting for him to tell her what was weighing on his mind.

Instead he said, "He missed you," so she turns around to see him, looking at them softly with a look on his face that Ginny could only describe as melancholy. It reminded Ginny of her fifth year, when he looked at her like that, like she was everything he wanted but was unattainable.

It seems she was going to have to demand answers after all. Very well.

"Alright Potter, spill. Whatever happened today that has got you relapsing into your teenage angst?"

He laughed, and this time it was a genuine one; BINGO!

Pulling a chair at their kitchen table and settling himself down he said " James kept crying after you left. A lot." 

"Uh-huh. Nothing he hasn't done before. "

"Yeah. Sure. But today I just realised.."

"Yeah?" She asked, settling down into the chair opposite him, shifting James into her lap who seemed very fascinated with playing with her hair.

Harry watched him for a moment and then continued, "I know James crying is nothing new. Yet for some reason, it just bothered me today, you know."

"Uh-huh."

"It made me feel like a bad parent." he confesses, looking a bit surprised himself, perhaps at that he had spoken it out loud, yet continued with "I have been feeling like it a lot these days."

There.The dam had finally broken. Ginny had long since suspected that Harry was having troubles with parenting. She had caught him brooding about with a tea mug in his hands instead of going back to bed after whatever ungodly hour James Sirius had decided to wake them up. 

She tried many times,to get him to talk, but between her own exhaustion, an infant with a strong pair of lungs and Harry's stubborn refusal to burden Ginny with anymore than she was already dealing with nothing had come out of it. But now that he seemed to want to talk, Ginny did not stop him.

"I just… "he paused, and swallowed, something he did when he was overcome with emotion but wanted to bite it down.

"I want to do this right. I have never wanted so badly to do something right in my whole life. Family..it means everything to me and I want to be a good father but I'm afraid I am failing."

"You are an amazing father, Harry."

He shook his head. 

"Am I?"

"Yes" Ginny agreed furiously.

Harry looked into her eyes at that and she hoped he could read her, that he could see himself from her eyes, how she fell in love with him more and more everyday as she saw more and more of dad Harry.

Looking away he continued, "I sure don't feel like it. Today, while you were away, all Jamie wanted was his Mum. I tried everything, feeding him your milk, his favourite toys - yes the pans and pots, we are lucky we have no neighbours- feeding him all sorts of baby food and yet nothing seemed to work for long before he started wailing again. "

Ginny replied, "I don't want to sound like I'm being condescending, but this is the only way I can seem to put it- he's a toddler Harry. No one knows why toddlers do what they do. If he was fussy with you today and missed me I doubt it's because he has decided you were a bad parent."

"I know that - rationally.But the part of me - the same part of me that gets jealous of blokes trying to chat you up or worries that Ron is going to make a new best friend  - that part of me makes me think I have been a bad father."

"Today when Jamie kept crying for you, and I wasn't able to calm him down or feed him any of the amalgamation of baby foods I made- it just felt like I was in over my head, without a clue about what was doing. I might as well have been one of those dads who say they are 'babysitting' their kids and leave them up to their mothers and that's not- I never want to be that."

"I don't just want to do this right, I want be good at this. Like I am at Quidditch or catching dark wizards. I know I can catch a snitch, I know how to find a criminal on the run from law. Just like that, I want to be good at taking care of my son...but today, everything I did kept failing and that made me think.."

"James dented your confidence, didn't he," she said softly.

"He did," Harry agrees looking over at the boy who was happily sucking on his toes, completely ignorant of the spiral he had sent his father through.

Lacing her fingers with his, she said,"My mum told me, with parenting, there's bad days and good days, but you've got to understand that having bad days is not equivalent to being a bad parent."

"I imagine she had a lot of those, with seven of you," replied Harry wryly.

"Two of them Fred and George", Ginny reminded him.

They sat for a moment in silence both lost in thought.

"Gin-"

 "Harry" ,they both started at the same time, and Harry motioned for her to go on.

"I was just thinking - I had help with this. My mum, Fleur, Angelina, my teammates - I had people to talk this with. To reassure me that I wasn't doing things wrong. But you don't have that."

"No. But I've got you."

"You do," she agrees. "But also, maybe you should talk to people too. Maybe my dad or Bill or George"

He snorts at that. "If anyone had told me ten years ago that I'd be talking parenting with George.." he trails off as Ginny gives a light chuckle.

"Seriously though," she says again,       "Give it a try. I'm always here though. To listen. Or if you wanna get competitive over who is the worse parent".

Grinning, he says "I fed him courgettes Gin. He hated it. I'm winning this game." and she smiles at him, simply happy to see him happy.

"Oh and what is it?", she asks, and at his quizzical raise of eyebrows she elaborates, "that you wanted to say? You wanted to say something but you let me go first."

At that he gives her a wide smile and says, 

"Just that I love you."

[r1-jw-lover]

Hello again. This is going to be a long response so buckle up.

Thank you for explaining how you felt about your side of the situation. I only joined Star Wars fandom since 2 years ago at most, so I could only imagine how it looked like personally engaging with fandom, both the good and bad sides, as a fan of colour back when Disney was releasing Star Wars movies every year back to back. But I definitely have heard of all the drama.

Maybe it's the way I have curated my fandom experience on Tumblr, but I'm sorry to hear that you have to see outright Sabine hate on her tag, which is outrageous, to say the least.

There was always a side of the Star Wars fanbase who dislikes/hates Sabine Wren long since Rebels (just Star Wars fans being Star Wars fans *derogatory*), but those who had complaints about her since Ahsoka usually, at least from what I've seen, loved her character in Rebels but hated her in Ahsoka, and most of them rightfully blame it on Dave Filoni's writing rather than Sabine herself or the actress who plays her.

I won't argue with you on how you view Sabine being shipped with Shin; it is understandable, and a valid opinion to hold.

About the Jedi, yes, they are an orientalist amalgamation of samurai and Buddhist monks that George Lucas took inspiration and appropriated from, but the way I see anti-Jedi fans defend their stance, and that in itself is sadly a very popular thing to do in Star Wars fandom, their behaviour mainly stems from an unwillingness to accept non-Western values, particularly Asian values, as the way of life for a Jedi, and an inability to stop projecting their own religious trauma onto a group of fictional Asian-inspired monks.

Since we are already on the topic of the Jedi, the reason I said Dave Filoni and his writing of the Jedi in Ahsoka spits in the face of Asian philosophies is, in particular, in regards to his take on attachment.

I think we can all agree that it is well-known a core philosophy of the Jedi, which George Lucas takes inspiration from Buddhism, is the concept of non-attachment. For all his appropriation of Asian and other cultures, George Lucas was pretty consistent about the Jedi's practice of non-attachment in the original and prequel trilogies, and in spite of his rather mixed execution, the fundamentals were quite in line with how it was viewed in Buddhism.

Putting aside how The Clone Wars and The Bad Batch are both full of whitewashing and racism among other things, Dave Filoni's earlier works in The Clone Wars and Rebels when it comes to the Jedi were aligned with Lucas' message of non-attachment for the most part. Unfortunately, when it comes to the Ahsoka show, Filoni chose to drop the ball so hard by making his half-baked plot as well as his Jedi-but-not-Jedi OCs Ahsoka Tano and Sabine Wren into mouthpieces of a mocking narrative to say: "attachment is good actually".

There are many other fans out there who delve deeper and in greater detail in their analysis and criticism about this issue, and they have done it better than I could ever do, but I think it doesn't need to be said that the whole gist of it effectively threw something that was taken directly from Buddhism itself into space trash. While those of us who have been critical of Dave Filoni from day one saw it coming from a mile away, we didn't expect how badly he would utterly and so openly butcher even this, the one thing that George Lucas got right about Asian philosophy.

Yes, I may appreciate how Dave Filoni had inserted various tidbits from Japanese culture into the Ahsoka series for what it is, but another person may find it contemptuous, even insulting, in light of how he treated the Jedi and their Asian-inspired philosophy.

Yes, Dave Filoni may have attempted to make Force-sensitivity be less about natural talent and more about training, which is more in line with how in many fantasy stories in Asian cultures, especially in Chinese culture which I'm most familiar with, even the most gifted characters had to work their way up to become as powerful as they are. But this is Star Wars we're dealing with.

As much as it's influenced by Asian cultures, Star Wars itself, and in turn, the Jedi, has connected in many ways with many other people around the world. A great part of Jedi culture centers around being Force-sensitive, and this aspect along with the larger story surrounding the Jedi resonates more with Jewish audiences than Asian audiences. And that's okay. It takes place in a galaxy far, far away.

This is where we intersect into Sabine Wren. I'm not saying the Mandalorians cannot be Jedi, or that Sabine herself hadn't uphold a few Jedi values she absorbed from Kanan and/or Ezra at multiple points throughout Rebels, but never was it hinted at that Sabine could possibly be Force-sensitive. Sabine wielding the Darksaber for a while doesn't change that.

But I could be wrong. I have no right, as a fan and consumer, to decide for Dave Filoni what is best for a character of his own creation. But I feel like this is giving him credit he doesn't deserve for the major changes he did to her character (mostly to prop up Ahsoka Tano), which conveniently ignores the rules of the universe and inadvertently takes away what was a meaningful facet of the Jedi for some and fantasy/escapism for others.

Maybe the idea of Sabine Wren being Force sensitive could have been written and executed better, and without doing a disservice to her personality, her values, her Mandalorian culture or the development she had been through, by a different showrunner, but not by Dave Filoni, as many fans have rightfully complained.

At the end of the day, this is just my take on things. As much as I hate it, we as fans of colour couldn't run away from confronting and reconciling the racism permeating in Star Wars media, whether through the material itself or the fandom at large. After all, as you have said, this is the first time in 46 years since its existence, since its 'stealing' of Asian cultures to build its foundations, that the franchise gave us an Asian Jedi on screen.

No amount of racism/racialised misogyny thrown at Sabine Wren is justified. Nonetheless, if I can reassure you a little, most of our gripes on this Mando-verse live-action portrayal of Sabine has nothing to do with her and everything to do with the decisions, creative or not, Dave Filoni and his Disney/Lucasfilm overlords chose to make.

another thing that's exhausting about the star wars fandom is how there's literally dozens of think pieces about how Sabine can't possibly force sensitive????

Like I'm only 3 pages in the ahsoka tag and already I've seen like 6 anti jedi sabine posts? Like can we talk about how freaking anti asian racism that is?

can we talk about how the actress for sabine is literally Asian?

(sidenote this was the only live action sabine gif I found and of course its freaking shinbine i'm gonna kms)

anyways this franchise is nearly 50 years old and they just now got an asian actor to be a Jedi????? even though lucas wanted toshiro mifune to be Obi Wan Kenobi???

because the Jedi are literally an orientalist amalgamation but in space????

i'm so angry rn.

mod laina

[maxwell-grant]

Downfall of a Dark Avenger Part 2: Shadows of Manhattan

Having finished reading Al Ewing’s El Sombra trilogy and having had enough time to digest it, I’d like to talk about the trajectory of it’s titular protagonist, the character and series’s relationship with it’s influences. Relating to The Shadow and Zorro and general pulp archetypes, and also the way it incorporates Astro Boy’s Pluto into the mix.

This part is focused on Gods of Manhattan and El Sombra’s first appearences in Pax Omega and the ways in which the urban vigilante manifests itself in the books. 

In Gods of Manhattan, El Sombra takes a backseat to it’s central players, Doc Thunder and The Blood-Spider. I’ve mentioned how Thunder, while ostensibly a Doc Savage/Superman amalgam, also combines aspects that allow the character to condense the entire history of the superman into a single being, but to a character very much centered on the future and in progressive ideals, described in the book as someone considered both the city’s ultimate savior as well as viewed as "a faggot, a liberal and a miscegenationist”. In that regard, the Blood-Spider becomes his opposite. Perhaps the most comprehensive savaging of the dark detective/The Shadow ever put on paper, that has a larger point behind the questions and criticisms it brings up to what this kind of figure can be. 

"You can hardly have a war on crime unless you are the one defining what a crime is. First rule of the war on crime: everyone is guilty or something"

Us am vigilantes! Am us not men? Us use violence to effect social change! Am us not men? Us bring terror to underclass, make streets safer for overclass! Am us not men? Am us not men?

Making them loved rather than feared. Having them fight crime, or the right kind of crime, at least. Created a persona designed to appeal to the worst in people, to bring the citizens of New York around to his cause, his war on crime, which would, of course, then become a war against ‘urban crime’. Or some other little euphemism. ‘Inhuman’, for example. Sounds a lot more relatable than subhuman, doesn’t it? Comes to the same thing, though.

Although The Blood-Spider is an evil take on The Shadow, most of his character traits are taken from characters that followed him. He’s got the moniker, savagery, fright tactics and branded murders of The Spider, he climbs buildings and has a civilian identity akin to Spider-Man’s, with constant name references to characters like Stacey, Jonah and a redhead named Mary Watson, with him sharing a name with Peter Parker as well as Batman villain Jonathan Crane, he’s got Rorschach monologues that are echoed by his associates past his demise in white supremacist organizations dedicated to carrying off Spider’s legacy, predating HBO Watchmen’s take on Rorschach legacy. If Doc Thunder is all about taking the superhero’s past to create a better future with it, Blood-Spider takes the future of the urban vigilante and uses it as a conduit to enact a barbaric and reactionary agenda in service of undoing everything Thunder stands for, even before he’s revealed to be a Nazi agent. 

Blood-Spider is what happens when the absolute worst aspects of said characters are brought to the forefront and twisted by a dose of reality. He’s to The Shadow what Plutonian is to Superman, the most sour way said character and legend can be twisted into something horrendous. He’s the Doutrinador in a fedora, everything I vehemently argue that The Shadow wasn’t, and yet seems sadly ever closer to as more and more comics dehumanize the character. He’s Howard Chaykin’s Shadow, naked and raw and exposed for what it ultimately is. An insult and a wake-up call, if a necessary one.

In fact, said poisoning of a legend is explicitly a plot point in the book, because the book establishes that, before The Blood-Spider, the city’s main vigilante used to be a man by the name of Blue Ghost, friend of Doc Thunder and, although a mysterious public figure, still firmly on the side of good. Unfortunately, moral victories aside, “good” alone doesn’t cut it in the world of El Sombra. 

You took a look at the Blue Ghost - mysterious masked avenger, operatives all over the place, big fan-following with the working classes, and you figured...we need one of those. Just take away the Japanese orphan kid and replace him with a foxy Aryan chick.

Blue Ghost is almost a textbook Spirit analogue, even defined as being beat up a lot as his main asset, except here, he’s placed as Doc’s counterpart that died before the story began and is now replaced by a darker and more horrendous counterpart, and because The Spirit was influenced by The Shadow, it opens a roundabout connection. You can read this as a comparison between the shift from Adam West’s Batman to Frank Miller’s Batman, or a comparison between The Shadow and earlier more straightforward pulp vigilantes like Jimmie Dale, or a comparison between the pulp/radio Shadow and later iterations of him or analogues to his archetype that upped the nastier aspects. Again, nothing in El Sombra is ever quite just one thing. 

And at last we come to El Sombra, who spends much of the book caught in between the duels of Doc, Untergang and players in between. And it’s interesting that here, while El Sombra’s final victories over the story’s major conflict lie in his willingness to team up with Doc, despite knowing of his origins as a Nazi weapon, his victories over Blood-Spider instead come from turning tricks of The Shadow against him. First, when he discovers Spider’s true nature, spying on him by pulling a Fritz the Janitor. And then in the finale, when he schools Spider on what a real shadowy avenger looks like. 

"Amigo...that's my sword"

The voice came from the darkness above them, where the gaslight did not reach. The Spider's blood ran cold for a long moment, and then he grabbed hold of his other gun, tearing it from its holster and raising it to fire a volley of bullets into the darkness. "Where are you? Show yourself!" he hissed, turning in place, the gun raised to fire at the slightest sound or movement.

"You're not the only one who can hide in the shadows, my friend. I've got very good at it, over the years."

"Show yourself!" Another volley of shots, with no result. Was he throwing his voice? Was he everywhere at once? Was he a shadow himself? A ghost?

The voice echoed from another place now, continuing his speech exactly where he had left off. And still that mocking voice echoed from the shadows above.

"See, I didn't know if you were a good guy or a bad guy. I mean, sure, you killed people, and you were kind of a dick about it, you know? But I didn't know if you were one of the bastards. I didn't know if you needed to die or not, amigo."

The gun clicked empty. He was out of bullets. He turned again, and there was the man in the red mask. Just standing there, in the middle of the concourse. His smile didn't look human. And his eyes. Oh, his terrible eyes...

"Stay back." The Spider whispered, and his voice sounded in his ears like a frightened, animal thing, waiting to curl up and die in its hole.

The man in the red mask only laughed. A rich, deep, joyous laugh, a laugh that echoed and filled the whole station, bouncing from pillar to pillar, careening through the great vaulted arches. Such a laugh!

Then the laughter stopped, and he fixed the Blood-Spider with a look that would freeze the fires of Hell.

And suddenly - quite suddenly - there was no Blood-Spider. There was only Parker Crane, the Nazi. Parker Crane, the traitor. Who thought he could destroy America, and only managed to destroy himself. Parker Crane. Just a man wearing a mask. He ran, and left the sword behind him.

"Nice trick," Doc murmured, turning to the masked man. "Throwing your sword from up on the balcony - good aim, by the way - then throwing your voice and a little mental suggestion to make him think you were up in the arches where he'd been. Where did you learn that?"

The masked man shrugged, lifting up his weapon. "In the desert. You can learn a lot in the desert, if you put your mind to it."

By the story’s end, once Lars Lomax, Thunder’s arch-enemy and Lex Luthor, takes center stage as it’s ultimate threat, Parker Crane is left a traumatized, broken shell unable to even move, utterly stripped of any mystique or power that his mask and guns may have brought him. And in the end, El Sombra finds him, neutralized and no longer a threat to anyone. And he makes his choice.

El Sombra knew what it was to hate, to hate so hard and so long that you knew nothing else, to hate so strongly that it crossed that line into something beyond reason.

He lifted his sword, resting the blade in his palm for a moment, considering. Crane only stared, weeping and making his soft, mad noises. El Sombra sighed, shaking his head. "You know, I don't know if I can kill a guy who's already dead. Even if he is one of the bastards."

"Don't let him in here." Murmured Crane, his eyes wide.

"Shhh, I won't let him in," smiled El Sombra in response, trying to be reassuring. "You'll never have to face him again. I promise. It's okay, amigo. It's okay."

It was strange. He knew he should feel hate for Parker Crane. It was Djego's job to bear things like pity and doubt, to feel sorrow and shame. That was Djego's role in their team of one. El Sombra was there to take never-ending revenge and to laugh and to never look back. But to know that his murder of Heinrich Donner - his righteous kill - had resulted in so much harm coming to so many... and now to see the leader of Undergang, the man he'd come to New York to kill, just an empty, broken madman, a shell of a person... El Sombra wondered if he was changing.

"Don't," whispered Crane, a tear rolling down his cheek. "Don't let him back in."

El Sombra smiled, placing a hand on his shoulder. "It's okay, amigo. I'm going to go and make sure nobody ever needs to see him again. And I couldn't have done it without you." He squeezed lightly. "You didn't mean to, but you did some good. Remember that."

Then, gently, he pushed the tip of the sword through the front of Crane's skull and into his brain.

He was not incapable of pity. But he was who he was, and he did what he did.

And broken or not, the bastards had to die.

We’ve seen El Sombra struggle and be faced with choices, choices between Djego and El Sombra, choices between kindness and violence, between peace and conflict. We’ve seen the conflict in his soul between things that he knows are right, because Djego is a good man with a good soul who wants good things for himself and others, and things he knows he must do, because he is El Sombra and El Sombra was created to kill the bastards that brought his world to ruin and therefore it’s what he must always do. And in the end, El Sombra is simply stronger. He has to be. But strength and violence and hatred can only get one so far. 

Gods of Manhattan is the trilogy’s moral compass, the book that most clearly defines the morality the series operates on. And in between the spectrums of justice embodied by Doc and Crane’s approach, between the two urban avengers in The Blue Ghost and Blood-Spider, El Sombra made his choice. And it’s the first choice that dooms him.

Enter Pax Omega, and we learn that, 4 years since the previous book's events, El Sombra joined a squad of agents called Yankee Bravo Seven, who work for an organization named STEAM, who enact missions against Nazis to turn the tides of war. He is joined by several other types of characters, including The Blood Widow, Crane’s former assistant Marlene Lang now having taken up the moniker (just as Nita van Sloan did for The Spider, even with the “Widow” prefix). We see that El Sombra has joined a team of bantering heroes and even formed a friendly rivalry with a man named Savate, modeled after Batroc the Leaper. 

But we see that the hunger for vengeance still burns, still burns beyond reason, restless because it’s been 4 years and the war still isn’t over and Hitler still isn’t dead by his sword. And it’s that restlessness that again dooms him, when he once again makes the wrong choice and betrays leader Jack Scorpio, Scorpio who had personally brought him on board and gave him the best shot he ever had at getting to Hitler. 

El Sombra frowned. "We need to make our move now."

Scorpio shook his head. "Not yet."

"What?" El Sombra looked incredulous.

"Wait for my signal, I said! Damn it, I need you to trust me!" Jack Scorpio reached up to brush the back of his finger across his forehead, and realised he was sweating. 

Through his special glasses, El Sombra's aura was glowing an angry, pulsing red, like a throbbing vein. "Just...trust me. I'm asking you to hold back for just five minutes. There's more going on here than you know."

El Sombra just stared at him, his lips pulling back from his teeth in a cold snarl.

"Trust me. That's all I ask." Jack Scorpio looked into the blazing eyes behind the bloodstained mask, and spoke softly, soothingly, almost desperately. "Can you just hold back for one minute?"

The eyes behind the mask narrowed.

"Can you?"

PERSONNEL FILE: DJEGO "EL SOMBRA". TO EYES ONLY: THIS INDIVIDUAL IS HIGHLY DANGEROUS. IT IS STRONGLY RECOMMENDED HE NOT BE INCLUDED IN ANY OPERATIONS CLASSIFIED ABOVE TOP SECRET OR HIGHER. (I'll take the risk - J.S)

El Sombra spat in Scorpio's face.

"Chinga tu madre."

Then he drew his sword and leaped down into the fray.

After the mission is over, with the base destroyed and a major victory secured, although with Jack Scorpio having been killed, the team disbands. El Sombra continues to wander the forests near the Luftwaffe base for about two weeks, killing as many Nazis as he can, until an explosion blast hits near him, knocking away his mask and portions of his leg and arm, and rendering him unconscious for 8 months. By the time he wakes up, the war has ended, and so has El Sombra for the past 7 years.

Djego was afforded the best of medical care at the hospital in Venice. El Sombra was nowhere to be found.

His mask had been torn off in the explosion, along with some of the meat of his leg and arm. He walked stiffly, now, with a pronounced limp, and his left arm was all but useless, hanging limply at his side. The Wildcat crew had salvaged his sword, but Djego had little interest in using it.

Gradually, he regained his mobility. The back of his head itched constantly, and he suffered from horrendous mood swings, when he would rage against the Fuhrer and the bastards, or weep helplessly, like a child. But gradually, he found his personality stabilising in the gentle, antiseptic atmosphere of the hospital. He found that Djego - so long despised as a weakling, a coward and a fool - was capable of a kind of gentle, melancholic wit that made him popular.

Djego healed and grew, and the itch in the back of his skull began to subside, as El Sombra relinquished his grip.

Djego felt his heart seize in his chest. The cloth was missing a scrap at the end, and there was mud ground into the fabric along with the old bloodstains; but it had two evenly-spaced holes in it, and was unmistakably a mask. It seemed to be looking at him.

He takes up gardening and establishes himself in the city of Brandenberg, he becomes a fixture of the city and a friend of it, he enters a relationship, and El Sombra never appears again.

Until a mysterious stranger named Leonard Lorraine, walks through his door one day, saying he’s got a mission to fulfill, and hands him his mask. And, once again, El Sombra is simply stronger, and he makes the wrong choice again. 

Djego shook his head and tried to step back from it, but his legs wouldn't move.

"No," he whispered. "No. Please"

"I was happy," pleaded Djego. "Doesn't that matter to you?" He picked up the cloth in trembling fingers, looking into the empty eyeholds. "Doesn't that mean anything?"

There was no answer. The patrons of the bierkeller did not even notice anything was happening.

"I was happy," Djego choked, and then, in one spasmodic motion, he pulled the mask onto his face, and secured it tightly, so that the knot once again rested in the back of his head, where it belonged: so tightly that it might never come off again.

El Sombra looked at his hands.

He prodded his belly, amused at the rounded shape of it, and took a couple of steps back from the bar. The limp was gone.

He laughed, very softly, so as not to disturb the patrons.

Djego and Lorraine walk through the desolate streets of Berlin, which in the years since has completely sealed itself from the outside world through an impossibly thick dome, and Djego discovers the city completely bereft of life, with only a few lobotomized robotic citizens aimlessly wandering and chewing on the mountains of corpses in the city, as their Nazi ideology reached it’s inevitable outcome of total annihilation of any and all that the party could find an excuse to slaughter in the name of purity, which eventually included it’s few remaining members. In this world, Hitler has been a brain inside a robotic contraption ever since 1945, and it’s amidst this scenario that El Sombra, while thinking about how his final confrontation with Hitler would play out, eventually finds what’s left of Hitler. 

All around them, there were the sounds of machinery, but the Mecha-Fuhrer was completely silent, utterly motionless. In the centre of its chest rested a tank of toxic green fluid, and on the surface of the fluid, a human brain floated, like the corpse of a goldfish.

It was quite dead.

El Sombra stared at the Fuhrer for a long moment. Eventually, he spoke, and his voice was cracked and raw, and choked with rage. "Is...is this a joke?"

De Lareine smiled his terrible smile. "The Fuhrer's body needed a great deal of maintenance and repair, you know. After two years, one of the processes delivering oxygen to his brain failed...and there was nobody left to repair it. He died, slowly." There would have been some pain, at the end".

El Sombra slammed his fist into the great iron throne on which the massive body sat, shattering his knuckles and tearing the skin from them. He didn't seem to notice. "Some pain," he choked, through gritted teeth."

El Sombra was still staring into the empty, dead eyes of the Fuhrer.

El Sombra again chooses poorly. It’s this moment, above all else, that truly damns him to his fate, as we come to see what is it exactly that a persona created for the purpose of vengeance has, when said vengeance is robbed from it. Like Parker Crane, his persona crumbles completely to expose the petty, ugly little feelings that drove it to such grandstanding antics in the first place, and the allmighty El Sombra is exposed for the all-too human failings that damned him once and for all.

"This isn't right," he said, eventually, in a strangled voice. "How...how can it end like this?"

"Why shouldn't it?" De Lareine shrugged. "Here's a thought. Maybe, despite his twenty-year tantrum and all his dressing up, spoilt little Djego is not the centre of the universe -"

El Sombra turned, face red, tears streaming from his eyes, and charged at De Lareine, slashing his sword. El Sombra crashed down onto the floor, into the soot scattered about, as De Lareine walked around him.

"Did you really believe Adolf Hitler would wait around for your sword? Did you not imagine that it might be better for him to seal himself off in a hole to die, instead of murdering and enslaving continents until you finally got around to him? Did you think you were the hero of your own little story, El Sombra, with your mask and your laugh and your-"

"Shut up!" El Sombra cried out, scrambling to his feet, the sword shaking in his hand, tears and snot running down his face. "He was mine! He was mine to kill!" He lifted the sword, the tip trembling. "Bring him back," he screamed, "do you hear me? Bring him back to life!"

De Lareine had to laugh at that.

And in the end, El Sombra is crushed, spiritually and physically as his spine is shattered by Lareine, who begins to experiment on him as he lays dying, ready to fulfill fate’s greater purpose for El Sombra. Ready to become not just the perfect machine Pasito’s conquerors intended, but a superior design. Ready to abandon his former life, ready to abandon everything that defined him, ready to shed any and all traces of Zorro and Shadow and pulp hero in his system, because the age of pulp heroes and superheroes has passed. 

The metal man emerged from his hole, dragging the corpse of the Fuhrer behind him.

The brain in the metal man's chest would, perhaps, live for thousands of years. He wondered how he would spend the time.

He remembered little of his former life; he had been a man named El Sombra, or perhaps Djego. He had been stupid - he realised that now - but that was something he would never be again.

Apart from that, there was only a succession of faces, the memory of laughter and of a final, awful betrayal that had destroyed him. But there was also the sense that a great and terrible mission had ended at last, and it was time for a new life to begin.

The metal man took a last look back at the great dome of Fortress Berlin. Somewhere in there, the Leopard Man was hunting, freed from his own mission. And in the Fuhrer's old office, the empty, lifeless clay of El Sombra - or was it Djego? - lay, discarded, like a butterfly's cocoon.

The metal man thought on this, as the Fuhrer rusted at his feet and the tanks began to approach from over the hills ahead.

He would need a new name.

It’s now the age of Pluto.

[leviathan-says-hi]

Ask 21 / Tag 21

Answer 21 questions then tag 21 people you’d like to know a little better. Tagged by @fahrenflame Hope you're doing well! 😊

× Nickname ×

Levi, I guess? Not too many nicknames, most people think my actual name's bizarre enough and just go with that 😅

× Real name ×

Leviathan

× Zodiac ×

Pieces 🐳

× Height ×

Uhhhh...like 5.7"-5.8" ish??? Maybe???

× What time is it? ×

13:03

× Favorite musician ×

Marilyn Manson, Ghost, My Chemical Romance...idk honestly. I don't really listen to whole artists anymore, I just find random songs I like by all different people and throw them in a huge playlist, so most of my 'favourites' I literally know like 1 song by ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ whoops. Individual songs I've been enjoying lately though are:

° Nightmares - Easy Life (hence the recent animation lol)

° The Bidding - Tally Hall

° Boys Will Be Bugs - Cavetown

° Carnal Carnival - Here Come The Mummies

× Favorite sports team ×

Ngh...not so much a sports person ngl, but my dad gave me his Oakland Raiders baseball jacket he had as a kid and I wear that a bunch so er...go Raiders?

× Other blogs ×

Oh god I have a whole bunch. I have the really bad habit of making a new one everytime I get wrapped up in something then kinda abandoning it...I'm probably most active on my Ghost one @cardinal-cornucopia

× Do I get asks? ×

Nah, not so much

× How many blogs do I follow? ×

Christ, like...4,000 I think. I've been here a while, what can I say 😅

× Any tumblr crushes? ×

Eh, more so admiration than crushes, but there's a few people who are pretty rad, yeah

× Lucky number ×

13! 6 is pretty chill too

× What am I wearing right now? ×

Having a slouchy day revising for uni stuff, so grey sweatpants and my Unus Annus shirt 👍 Comf

(Quick side note, imma be pretty busy until the start of February when the new semester kicks in / spring exams are over, so hopefully I can start back up drawing/animating then!)

× Dream vacation ×

Maybe a road trip? I'm not really one for travel but a long, chilled-out drive to nowhere sounds really good rn

× Dream car ×

Welp, my sucky health means I would be considered the biggest of liabilities on the road so was basically told it's not even worth getting my licence 😅 BUT teenage me was really into motorbikes and was actually saving for a Suzuki GN125 👌

× Favorite food ×

Probably mac n cheese? Any form of instant noodle/pasta that can be microwaved at 3am between assignments. University broke me, what can I say

× Drink of choice ×

Blue raspberry jolly rancher soda / Pink grapefruit Fanta / Vanilla coke are my sugary weaknesses, but I also really love weird tea flavours like strawberry cupcake green tea and pineapple with grapefruit!

× Languages ×

English...barely 😅 Tried learning Russian but got sick so had to stop. Brain don't work so good ✌️ Think I still rember the alphabet/1-10 though!

× Instruments ×

Okay, okay so like, hear me out...I play banjolele. Well? No. Enthusiastically? Very! For anyone who doesn't know it's like the ungodly amalgamation of a banjo and ukulele and I love it to death. I also have a full sized banjo and ukulele not smushed together too so I guess they count separately too? But yeah, banjolele's my main squeeze 🖤

× Celebrity crushes ×

🤫

× Random fact ×

I've got a few months of neuroscience left before I should get my psychology degree, and I've been (unofficially, shh!) invited to stay on and complete a masters degree in research methods! Whoo 🎉🎊✨ Sounds boring, I know, but my academic dream would be a PhD in evolutionary psychology/neuroscience soooo...Slowly, slowly doing the thing 👍

× Tagging ×

Been out of the loop for a while so no idea who's done this already or not, sorry!

@pierlerett

@cardicishot

@markipliersin89

@nameless-jinx

@haunted-kazoo

@goodboysatan

@copias-caboose

[heck-im-lost]

A beautiful Christmas

Genre: just pure fluff

Pairings: romantic logince, platonic LAMP

Word Count: 1859

Warnings: slight self doubt about presents being good enough but nothing serious, cursing

Notes: this is for the @darknightvirgil 's Christmas exchange: I had @adultmorelikeadolt so enjoy my friend!!!

also, how do you title haha. this was a direct stream of consciousness so I have no clue how good/bad this actually is because it just seemed so good in my head...

and on AO3:

Taglist: @creativity-killed-thekitten

Logan stared blankly at his computer screen. He knew that he had been working too hard for too long without a break, but the next video still wasn't close to being ready and he couldn't let the fans down again. They had had to wait so long for the last video and he could not let it happen once more. He wanted to go down and see them all, but he just had so much left to do.

Roman had repeatedly told him to take care of himself more. And Logan knew that he was letting his boyfriend down, and pushing him away, but he had to get this finished goddamn it.

There was a knock at the door.

"Uh, yes. Come in."

Roman burst dramatically into the room.

"Hello, my one true love! I have come to drag you out of this dungeon! You are under arrest for overworking yourself and not seeing your boyfriend! We're going Christmas shopping, specs! Get yourself presentable and then get yourself outta here!"

"Uh, well Roman, I should really finish this off before going out anywhere. It's not that I don’t want to be with you, not at all my dearest. But this is important and there will be time for trivialities after I have got this done. I promise."

"I'm afraid you don't have a choice on this one, Specs! Christmas is in only a few days and then it will be over, the fans can wait on this one. And anyway, I want to spend Christmas with you, not have you in here by yourself. Take a break, Nerd!"

"But- I-" Logan looked down at his work and sighed. "Alright then. I was rather missing you anyhow."

Roman held out his hand and Logan took it, allowing himself to be pulled up into Roman's arms.

"I love you, gorgeous." He whispered into Logan's ear, rubbing his boyfriend's back gently.

"I love you too. I'm sorry-"

"It's okay, let’s go."

~

Roman had constructed a shopping mall in the mindscape many Christmases ago to buy gifts, at first it was undeveloped; the shop keepers has empty faces and the shops felt floaty, like in an old memory that you couldn't quite remember if it was real or a dream. But as Thomas grew older Roman had more references to go from and was more accomplished at imagining things into existence. An amalgamation of the best bits of every mall Thomas had ever been to, the mall was now so well built that it felt as real to the sides as standing in Thomas's own living room. And every year at Christmas he would put Christmas decorations everywhere, and they would go Christmas shopping together.

~

Roman excitedly led Logan to the entrance to the mall, where Patton and Virgil were eagerly waiting. Well, maybe it was just Patton who was looking eager, but this was the first time Virgil had come along himself, without thinking that he was unwanted and having to be persuaded to come, so it would do.

"Okay kiddos! We'll split up now, and then all meet in the cafe again in a couple of hours, does that sound okay?" Patton was jumping up and down with excitement. "Oh, I just love getting people gifts! I'm super duperly looking forward to this!!!!!!!!!!"

"Okay, well I'll go with Roman, and you and Logan can go around together. Let's go." Virgil looked expectantly at Roman, who nodded slightly.

"Logan!!! Let's go kiddo! See you all later!!!"

Logan smiled one last time at his boyfriend before he was whisked away by Patton.

"Why did you want to come with me, Charlie Frown?" Roman may have been insulting him, but the kind smile on his face let the anxious side know that there were no hard feelings.

"Welp I didn't get much sleep last night and I knew that if I went with Logan he'd just lecture on about healthy sleep schedules and healthy caffeine intakes and it would just be rubbish. And you aren't that bad." Virgil gave a quick smirk at Roman. "Come on, I want to go get Patton some stuffed toys."

~

"Oh God Patton, what am I going to get him? He has been so incredible to me and none of this seems good enough! I can't just get him a lacklustre gift that he will look at once and then put on a shelf and forget about! I need to get him something that will show how much he means to me! But-" Logan frantically paced up and down, his speed almost matching that of his racing thoughts.

"Calm down, it's okay kiddo! Everything is okay! You don't have to get him the perfect gift, there might not be anything that shows just how much you love him, as love is so much more than things you can buy. It doesn't matter though, just get him something that shows how much you care about him. Something that shows you were thinking of him. That’s all."

"I suppose it would be stupid to attempt to convey such an abstract, intense feeling as love in simple material items. I will just get him something that I know he will like. Come on Patton! I have an idea."

~

“Oh, Virgil what am I going to do what am I going to get him? I love him so much but this time it feels like no gift, nothing I could do would show him how much I care about him. I am one for romantic gestures, you know me, but nothing I could get him would be enough for what he deserves! I have to get him something, but- “

"Dude it's okay! That guy is so in love with you you could get him one shoe for Christmas and it would become his favourite thing and would go on his special things from Roman shelf. We both know he has one. You don't have to stress out about this - it's my job to stress out about things. Just get him something that shows that you are thinking about him - all he really needs for Christmas is you."

"Virgil?"

"Yeah?"

"Virgil the emo who lives in an angst cave where it is always Halloween?"

Virgil sighed.

"Yeah?"

"Did you just reference Mariah Carey's 'All I Want For Christmas Is You'?"

"I hate to say I did. But I knew I needed something dumb and Christmassy to get to you. And anyway, I've got all of my gifts for the others, let's finish up getting yours before we have to meet up with the others, okay?"

"Okay, my dark and stormy knight. And thanks, I've just had the best idea of what to get my special Nerd!"

~

As he and Patton made their way into the cafe, Logan hoped that the ridiculous shape of the long, narrow box he was carrying wouldn't give away what it was. But when he saw Roman and Virgil, already sitting at the table next to their curious pile of bags and boxes of equally strange sizes, his worries left him. His boyfriend looked amazing. And it looked like Virgil was somehow already on his third cup of coffee.

"Are we late?" Roman spotted Logan looking nervously at Virgil’s coffee mugs

"No Virgil just decided to order three cups at once to avoid having to queue again. Anyway, how did it go, my beloved? Was it worth coming out?"

"OF THE CLOSET!" Patton burst out, laughing as he sat down next to Virgil.

"It went very well, Roman, my love. I have got everything I needed, and- well- I am glad to be back here with you." Logan felt himself blush and smiled, thinking of spending time with Roman: his work forgotten.

"I am too, my shining star."

~

It was Christmas day and Patton had woken them all up at exactly the time he was allowed to. (After one year when Patton had woken them all up at 4:30 in the morning because he was awake and excited and wanted to open his presents as soon as possible, they had enforced a strict "no waking people up before 8:30 on Christmas day" policy.)

Patton handed Virgil a cup of coffee, Logan a cup of tea, Roman a cup of peppermint tea, and excitedly led them all to the living room, where the presents were piled under the tree.

"IT'S CHRISTMAS!!!!!"

"Yes Patton, and we are very tired so please don't yell in my ear." Logan took a long sip of his tea, and looked across at Patton who was bouncing up and down like a child. "Right then Patton do you want to go first?"

Patton excitedly grabbed a package - it was from Roman. He hurriedly tore at the paper, until out came a Winnie the pooh plushie.

"Oh my God Roman I love it! Aaaaaagh thank you!!!!!" Patton was positively bouncing.

"Squeeze the paw Patton."

The Winnie the pooh song started playing.

"Aaaaaaaagh!!!!!!!! It's perfect!!!!!!!"

And they continued like that, taking it in turns to open presents until there were just two left under the tree.

"Logan, for you, my precious."

"Way to sound like Gollum" Virgil muttered, and Roman shot a glare in return.

Logan slowly unwrapped the present, the last and biggest present from his boyfriend. He methodically cut each piece of tape, to reveal-

"A telescope! Wow Roman- I- Thank you so much I have always wanted to look at the stars outside my window properly."

"I just imagined you looking through the telescope and explaining to me the constellations. It would be so romantic and I know you would have lots to tell as you always wanted Thomas to be an astronomer."

"I would love that Roman! Now, here you go, and be careful with it." He handed Roman the long package.

"I have been so curious about what this could be!!" He started to unwrap the meticulously wrapped present.

"It could be a pogo stick." Virgil remarked.

"Or a tube of jelly beans. You know how you can get the long tubes and they are full of jelly beans and they-"

"We know them, Patton.” Virgil smiled fondly at Patton. “It could be a long thin hat."

"It could be a broomstick. I don’t know why Logan would get him a broomstick but it could be."

Roman finally rolled the box out of the wrapping paper. He gasped.

"I thought you said it was too dangerous!"

"Well I know how much you enjoyed it so..."

"What is it? What is it?" Patton leant over to get a closer look.

"My wonderful, amazing, perfect boyfriend who I love has gotten me a new KATANA!!!"

"And this one is weighted so it is actually statistically easier to use and will result in less chance of you getting injured, whilst being more effective in battle. I made sure to do quite a lot of research before buying to ensure I got the right one, so I hope it is satisfactory."

Roman grinned.

"It is more than satisfactory, Nerd. I love you so much, did you know that?"