#he's a strong man but everyone needs a mom y'know?

[rottttenlasagna]

mama's boy

[geminibsworld]

Preachers daughter (one shot *maybe* )

⚠️: daddy!kink (a bit) innocence!kink, pinv, fingering,oral recieving and giving (m & f)

it was a summer afternoon, church was just starting. pearl, the preachers daughter, sat up front smiling proudly, while her father preached about the good lord. her mother sat next to her, pearl looked around. her eyes landing on Jessie's gang, she rolled her eyes turning around to face the front. she was trying to listen to her father when she felt eyes burning into her. she turned around, her red lips agape, as she's met with bluest eyes she's ever seen.

Billy the kid, of course. an outlaw, basically. he had a wild reputation, he'd never kill anyone but he has a reputation. a harlot reputation. every girl and mom had been with billy. pearl could never, she would never allow it.

"Amen!" voices interrupted her, as she turns around clapping and smiling with everyone else. she stood up with her family, her dress sticking to her as it was 90⁰ outside. it was 1982, and things were simple. pearl and her family lived the simple church life. she liked it that way, simple.

"pearl," her father's voice came into peer, she turned and grinned.

"wonderful speech, daddy," her country accent sweet like honey. billy loved your voice, he knew you sounded like honey so you had to taste like honey. billy cleared his throat taking off his hat as he stood behind the family.

"hello.. young man," pearls father tight lipped smile, glared at billy. he didn't care, he knew what people thought.

Billy's hat was in his hands as he was showing respect, pearl smiled to herself behind her family.

"I've heard you need help on your farm, sir," Billy's gruff Texas accent played like a melody in her ears. she gulped, as she felt chills on the hottest day she's felt in awhile.

"well, uh, I don't know-" her father began.

"sir, I'm a hardworker and I can do anything you need, pay me or don't." Billy's pleaded, his voice trying to not sound desperate. truth was he needed work, he needed to take care of his own self too. he needed to eat.

♡

pearl was outside, on the porch watching Billy front a distance as he was shoveling hay. she watched his back, his tall broad frame yet skinny waist. he was strong, his muscles flexed, and he threw his head back taking off his hat and wiping his forehead.

pearl got an idea. she'd bring him water.

pearl walked out in a small white dress, nothing underneath of course, too hot for all that. her parents were already asleep, she felt bad but was so curious at the same time. she walked feeling the soft grass between her toes under her small feet, holding a jug of water. she felt so nervous, she hadn't talked to a lot of boys before, if so they were related due to her father.

she peered into the barn seeing billy, shirtless this time, sitting on the hay wiping his forehead again.

"y'know it's rude to stare," his voice caused her eyes to bug out of her head. she gulped before saying,

"well, you need water," she stated, quietly feeling nervous now. he stood up over her, and stared down at her, he smirked at her nervousness before grabbing the jug outta her hand and drinking while making eyecontact with her. he watched her shake, he almost laughed. so innocent, he thought. he wanted to see her shake in another way.

"thank you, maam," he handed the water back to her, she gulped nodding not making eye contact. billy noticed this.

"why won't you look at me ?" his voice low, causing a feeling to arise in her in her lower belly. she'd never felt that before.

"well, my momma said if I ever so much as look at a man they'll take advantage of me," pearl said, quietly. billy nodded, taking it in.

"well, I would never take advantage of such a pretty girl," his accent thick, and low now.

pearl gulped stepping back, looking at his naked large chest then back to his eyes then anywhere else. billy liked how innocent she was, how she wouldn't look into his eyes, he craved that.

*

pearl was cleaning up after the service. billy walked by and looked in the stained windows, seeing pearl bent over, he caught a view of her panties. her whole ass was out, and she didn't even notice or so he thought. he decided to walk in when she walked away, he locked the door behind him, quietly. she walked back into the room, she jumped seeing billy.

"h-hi william," she coughed, smoothing down her dress.

"hi, honey," his accent heavy, she shivered when he said that. she shook off her thoughts before asking a question.

"why are you here?" she asked, unsure. billy smiled at her.

"to see my favorite girl of course," pearl looked away, and continued to pick up every Bible.

"I don't think she's here, try again later. normally harlots don't go to church." pearl sneered at him, flipping her long dark hair over her shoulders.

"oh but she is," he stepped towards her, too close, she thought. she gulped, looking away continuing on grabbing every Bible.

"she wears little dresses, never a bra, and always wears the most innocent looking panties. but I know she could be my harlot if I touched her in the right place. would you like that, honey?" his accent low, and rough.

her mouth fell open, she was feeling something she felt the other night. her lower stomach bubbling in heat, a wetness poured in her panties.

billy noticed her silence and her reaction, she looked so small and innocent. he stepped forward, brushing a few hair behind her ear. her bright green eyes staring back. he leaned in and pressed a small kiss to her lips.

she was surprised and pulled back. his eyes darker and his lips fuller now.

she gasped at the sight of him, he was so beautiful.

"have you ever touched yourself before?" his southern accent breaking the silence.

"um no," pearl said, quietly. her cheeks reddened by now, she was biting her lip.

"may i?" he asked her, peering into her eyes.

pearl reluctantly nodded her head, billy picked up pearl like she weighed nothing.

"wrap your legs around me, dollface," and she did. he carried her to the priests office, shutting and locking the door then laying pearl down on the desk. her body lay there, as she anxiously waited, billy threw everything on the floor turning her body so it's long ways.

"billy, I've never done this before," she sat up on her elbows, hair a mess and her strap falling off her shoulder. billy laughed as he took off his belt and vest. he had lost his hat a bit ago, his hair had grown so much.

"baby, I know what you have and haven't done. I still wanna take care of ya," he leaned down between her thighs. she was soaked, she was so embarrassed, she tried closing her legs.

"let me taste you," he mumbled into her, before taking a long wet stripe to her wet patch on her panties. she moaned out, her hands fitting her dress. he pushed up her short dress more, exposing all of her.

"that feels nice," she said, not even realizing what was going on. billy smirked, pulling her white wet panties down her thighs. once they were gone, he pushed her legs up on the desk spreading her all the way open.

billy gasped, she was dripping. literally honey, he thought. he dove right in, no warning. licking her clit, she screamed out. his tongue playing with her clit, slowly.

"oh my-" she breathed out, whimpering. billy smirked to himself before speeding up, his tongue doing soft but fast. a feeling way coming up, she felt like she had to pee. she was a moaning whimpering mess.

"my messy baby, your pussy is soaking. can't wait to feel you around me. " he grumbled into her, she cried out as he took in all her juices, not missing any.

"feel good baby?" he sat her up, she lazily sat up. her hair falling behind her.

"take your dress off baby," she obliged, tiredly. billy smirked watching her as he unbuttoned his button up, and pulled down his pants. her dress was off as she watched him, she looked down and gasped.

"big, ain't it? sometimes the ladies call me billy the man," he laughed, "too bad, I only want you to call me that," he winked at pearl.

"I bet you say that to all the girls," pearl mumbled, looking down away from his gaze. two fingers lifted her head, their eyes met.

"I wouldn't lie to you, honey," he mumbled planting a kiss on her forehead, "now lay back and let daddy do his thing,"

she laid back, his large fingers rubbed her clit in circles. she was seeing stars, she was a whimpering messy little girl and billy loved it.

"billy,-" she breathed out, eyes rolling in the back of her head.

"baby, im gonna try somethin'" suddenly two finger plunged into her, his large fingers giving her a filling feeling. his fingers curled, causing this feeling to happen. billy continued, adding another finger. he finger fucked her, hard.

"daddy," she moaned, billy had to hold back his moan.

"fuck it," he mumbled, grabbing his hardened member spitting on it while rubbing in his precum. while pearl was in her own euphoric world, he played with her small bud rubbing in circles with his thumb.

he placed himself at her entrance, before pushing in slowly. inch by inch by inch, she could feel herself expanding around his large member. the farther he got in the more she wanted more, he pulled all the way out before sliding all the way back in hard. she cried out, he wrapped his toned arms around her back pulling her up, before slamming his hips into hers multiple times.

"fuck bi-daddy," she cursed as he fucked her roughly. rough sex was Billy's favorite and most girls liked it because his big cock.

billy moaned as he fucked her, their hips meeting, he pulled her into a messy kiss. he stuck his tongue in her mouth, she could taste herself. she sucked on his tongue causing this animalistic sound to come out of billy. he pulled away, before pulling her out and flipping her over so she was bent over the desk.

"such a pretty pink pussy baby, can't wait to destroy it," he spit on his cock, jerking it a few times before sliding into her wet hole.

she moaned, billy went in so deeply he could feel her cream on his cock. he grunted, her ass jiggling against him. he reached for her long hair pulling her back so she could look at him as billy was filling her up.

"fuck," she cried out as he plunged into her, billy was turned on, she was his bad girl. he wanted that, he wanted to turn her and he did.

"preachers daughter my ass," he only went harder, she clenched around him crying out. tears staining her pretty pink cheeks.

"you my dirty whore? huh?" billy grunted, pulling her head back more.

"oh my God yes daddy, I'm your dirty whore," she cried out, Cumming again on his cock.

billy was close, he became sloppy yet hard still. he wanted to cum on her back, he wanted to see the cum on her.

"fuck, honey, I'm close," he breathed, letting go of her hair, moving to her lips.

"daddy fuck, don't stop," they moaned together before billy pulled out and finished on her back.

pearl was out of breath, and sore. extremely sore, there was a liquid pouring down her legs. she looked around for billy, he wasn't there. she began to feel used, upset.

billy came walking in, his thermals on and a rag in his hand, she felt much relief.

"lemme take care of this mess baby," he smiled at her, she nodded grinning biting her lip as he wiped her and him clean.

"I'd like to see you again, doll," he smirked, she bit her lip hiding a grin slipping on her dress. she picked her panties off the ground, handing them to billy.

"keep these", she whispered before asking, " you workin today?"

billy smirked getting dressed, before looking at her .

"oh I'm workin' today darlin. I'll take ya home, and we can continue, if you'd like of course." billy said, smooth but sweetly.

"sure, daddy,"

she stopped calling her dad, daddy so dw no one will be confused or weirded out.

[real-sun-wukong-fan01]

Wukong successfully gaslit the entirety of heaven into thinking he’s a cis man. “Didn’t you introduce yourself as a woman when you first-“

“No?? Obviously not?? What is with you??”

Wukong accidentally made everyone think he was a cis male and then he starts saying how he relates to women issues (physical ones) because he has them, because he never transitioned and never really had the idea of doing it. He has no gender or body dysphoria, especially because he's comfortable in his body and he has no real concept of gender. He knows he's a female, everyone just calls him a he and he genuinely dosen't care. He's male? Okay.

So, when he starts saying how he does relate to those specific women issues and sometimes talks specifically like a woman (those bits where man and woman can't comprehend each other, but wukong can exactly understand women, but can't understand men) everyone gets confused.

Because, weren't you a MALE monkey?

his case of trans (or well, genderfluid in my eyes) is really fun, because he isn't like the classic type of "i ain't a girl I'm MAN" no.

It's him. Not caring about human way of seeing gender. Being comfortable with his female body of a macaque. But he still calls himself a male because he likes it that way. (He doesn't like the idea of woman at the time jttw takes place at least, he's fine on being any kind of gender really. As long as you don't expect him to be something he isn't, he can be everything. Your mom, your dad, your uncle, a female, a male, non-binary. Anything he wants that day.)

But when heaven or the jttw do fits out, they need a minute to process, especially when it's very early in the time (around 1500, and people weren't so..fond of women being strong ect. Y'know, the stereotypes and patriarchy.)

Because, a FEMALE MONKEY DEFEATED HEAVEN?

A female is that strong? What?

Wukong must be joking.

I would say they would be rather transphobic or just straight up don't understand.

because i do know that they didn't care about lesbians or gays, they were fond of it, emperors used to have male lovers. Not only in china, but the Roman empire also had emperors who had male lovers as well, and so on. It was a common thing at the time.

But trans? Genderfluid? Anything that isn't in the binary?

Eh. I don't think so, i still need to research about it, but i doubt.

If they are fond of it, then the only problem would be the sexism.

If women couldn't even work, imagine how much of a shock it would be having a "woman" being such a strong demon. Y'know?

but again there's the Kingdom of women, and there's the king macaque (pretty sure it's QUEEN, king in Chinese is the same as queen) so i also wouldn't be surprised if jttw was okay with women being strong ect.

Silly thought.

[angelic-writer]

Whumpcember Day 13 - Restraints (Alt 3. Drowning)

CW: Aftermath of torture, Drowning

"Please... Please stop this..." Mark pleaded as he looked up at O'Brien.

"Why? I've only just gotten started." O'Brien drawled.

"Stop it, please!! Don't hurt him!!" Bill screamed as he struggled against his restraints.

The blonde man simply smiled and pulled out his knife. He laid the blade against Mark's cheek, reveling in his flinches as blood slowly trickled down. "Well, aren't you adorable? You're just like a bunch of little lambs."

"Don't fucking touch me!! You won't get away with this!" Mark screamed.

O'Brien chuckled. "Still got that fiery spunk in you! I like that!"

"W-Why are you doing this?! We haven't done anything to you!" Jonah cried.

The blonde cocked his head to him, his neck almost bending at a horrific angle. "Why? Because you two got too nosey. You were trying to free the little sinners when I'm just trying to cleanse them of their wickedness."

"You think this is gonna help them?! You've been torturing them for days!! The police are gonna find them and they're gonna throw your ass in jail!!" Mark shouted.

"Now why would you be defending them? They're nothing but witches. They're just blemishes on this perfect town. You two didn't have to get involved, but you just had to stick your noses in where it doesn't belong." He sighs. "Y'know what? I'm getting tired of this. I was waiting until Jesus' birth to get rid of all of you, but it's become obvious that you guys won't listen, so..." He pointed his knife at them one by one like some sick game of Eeny Meeny Miney Mo.

"Eeny, meeny, miney, mo. Catch the tiger by the toe. If he hollers, kill them all. My mom knows the very best and you..."

Tick

"Are."

Tick

Tick

Tick

Tick

Tick

"It."

His knife hand landed on Mark. "Let's start with you first. Cause you've been such a good, but feisty boy." He pulled out the key and unlocked Mark from his restraints. He could've ran, but O'Brien already grabbed his by the hair. Everyone began shouting, crying and struggling to get out of their binds as Mark was dragged out of the room.

He dragged him downstairs to a metal tub that was filled with water. He looked at him with that same crescent moon smile. "It's time for your baptism, Mark~"

Before he could get any air in, O'Brien threw the boy into the tub, holding his head down, causing him to struggle. He scratched at his arms, trying to fight back against the pastor, but he was too strong.

He pulled his head out, allowing him to cough and gasp before he was dunked in again. It happened again and again, Mark trying his best to hold his breath. He wouldn't let this man, this absolute monster, be the death of him. Cesar, his friends and the police are coming. They will save his cousins. They will know what O'Brien has done.

Suddenly, O'Brien bashed his head against the tub, causing him to wince. He planted his knee on Mark's stomach, squeezing the air out of his lungs. He started flailing and hitting him, clawing at his legs, but his grip remained firm. He started to spasm as the water started to fill his lungs. There was something so exhilarating about seeing O'Brien's prey struggle like this. To look at him with absolute fear in their eyes, knowing they're staring at the face of death. He was like a wolf staring at his prey struggling against his maw.

There is no hope for this boy. He will be forgotten soon. He will be nothing more than a fleeting memory.

His struggles grew weaker and weaker until eventually, he became still. He tilted his head, scanning his work. A shame. He was on his way to leading the next generation of Mandela citizens. Why did he have to throw it away for some sinners?

He left the kitchen, leaving behind the drowned husk of Mark Heathcliff.

When the priest came back, one look at his soaked robe told the other hostages all they need to know.

"So..." He widely smiled. "Who's next?"

[spookiestheadcanons]

You got any headcanons for the hauntiest house gang? I love those goobers sm

OH I DO!!!

...even though i suck remembering their names. ok so, i know most of them but i forgot the marge one and i'm unsure about the wolf. i saw that it was diego, but still, i'm not sure

i'll call him like that (+ the frankinsin's bride as aria) but if i'm wrong pls tell me so i can edit the post!!

also, i made the headcanons based on their interactions, but i'll do each one in different posts if requested.

Headcanons: Hauntiest House Gang!

for some reason i can't put the gif

Ethan is definitely the brat of the house

His favorite hobby is to annoy his friends somehow because their reaction is always absolutely hilarious

Well, except for Liv, she's the most fun one there and will annoy other with him play along

Streber and Leon are his main victims

Meanwhile, Diego is just... standing there

Nothing bothers that man, he's just so chill and so friendly

Streber is kinda the opposite tho, depending on what he's doing he'll TOTALLY get annoyed

"Oh my f-" *sighs* "Can you stop doing that?" "Doing what? I'm not doing anything! Oh, I'm not touching you!~" "...I hate you."

He never means it.

Y'know Kenny from South Park? Confi is basically him

They'll stay quiet and when you least notice they'll mumble the most random and cursed thing you'll hear all day

"Yeah and then when we came back-" "Guys did you knew that Fanta is like a naz-" "Confi please, not again!"

Aria is the most responsible one between them and everyone agreeded to call her Mom

She didn't got angry tho, she likes them a lot

The one who takes it most seriously is Liv

Liv's parents can't support her childish behaviour but Aria absolutely loves it

ANYWAYS

Diego and Leon get along very well, even better than Streber and Ethan

And they literally got to the point to match costumes-

They definitely work out together and Diego still can't accept how hidden Leon's muscles are even though he's SUPER strong

Streber was the one who got practically everything for the haunted house

"Woah, it's impressive! But... how you didn't got poor yet?" "I got my ways!~"

And some angst to end with some sadness:

Streber abandoned the haunted house after the incident. Yup, he quit

The way everything happened was just so traumatizing that he's scared even to leave on Halloween

With that, Ethan turned into the new owner of the haunted house

He went NIGHTS without sleeping because... well, Streber is smart and he's dumb, but he still needed to create new things to entertain children

And when the mirror broke? God, what headache

He could've just asked Streber to explain things, but just like the others Ethan didn't wanted to bother him and even less after such trauma

"Ethan, please, you need some sleep... why don't you try to fix it tomorrow?" "Yeah dude, look at you. Wait, where's your sock?" "Let's go already, we can... watch a movie if you like! Isn't it easier for you to fall aslee-" "No. Streber worked hard on this. I'll fix it as soon as possible."

And then the all of them decided to start helping him aswell <3

[xaracosmia]

ꕥ — WELCOME TO CATA COSMIA, AFTON KAZAMA. 🌕

ꕥ  — OOC INFORMATION;

name / alias: mocha

age: 29

pronouns: they/them

ooc contact: @ givemeurbread on twt!

triggers: N/A

other characters in xc: primula aoki & afton aoki - original characters, Twilight Sparkle - My Little Pony: Equestria Girls

ꕥ  — IC INFORMATION;

name: afton kazama 

age: 33

pronouns: he/him

series: original

canon point: n/a

app triggers: parental death mention, child abuse, psychological abuse, alcohol mention, general violence, human experimentation, firearms, scars/burn scars, needles,

personality: Years ago, Afton would be described as stubborn, reckless, aggressive, violent, and bloodthirsty. And while all of those can still hold true, he has calmed in his age. At first glance, Afton seems intimidating - a strong, straight posture, a hardened gaze, no nonsense. Yes, there are times where he’s a little rough, a little tactless, and maybe even downright rude - but, underneath that, is simply a man who wants to do right by his family. Though he may complain, he is terribly selfless, especially to children, and often goes out of his way to help the moment he sees someone in need. His no-nonsense ways simply comes from being ‘too old to deal with this crap,’ choosing to simply go straight for a solution. Can he be impatient? Stubborn? Reckless? Yes - old dog, and all of that. Does his venomous sass outweigh his younger cousins? Most definitely. But Afton, at the end of it all, is a man trying to leave the world better than he left it. 

something your muse struggles with: dealing with his trauma - his anger and aggression is from years of taking everything done to him, and putting it in front of him as a wall to make things easier, or to not think about it. afton really struggles with being open and vulnerable to almost anyone - even renji doesn’t always get to see the vulnerable sides of afton. 

your muse’s greatest strength: afton has such a strong sense of justice, even if it’s a little black and white at times. do what you have to to get the job done, and always do what you gotta do to protect the little guy. he’s also incredibly loyal to those that have his heart - once afton trusts you, he wouldn’t hesitate to hurt or be hurt for you. 

history / background:

“Wanna know my story? Interesting. Most people are lookin’ to hire me, or lookin’ to kill me. Thank Christ you’re neither. Two things I needa know, though.

One, do ya drink? I need a drink. And, two, gotta light?

Ah, figures. Anyway, ain’t much to tell. Was born in the heart of Kyoto, father was a proud scientist, mom stayed at home when I was a kid… Never found out why. She ended up leaving him when I was 16, anyway. I don’t blame her.

Dad taught me to fight when I was old enough. Came from a disciplined family, but I still thought a scientist knowing martial arts was weird. Held my first gun at six, and of course, I was shit with it. Dad said I took to it well though. 

School was decent enough. Made a few friends, a few enemies. Never got along with everyone: who does? At any rate, when I was old enough, Dad asked me if I wanted to get into the family business. I said I didn’t know, but I guess he had the answer for me, anyway - started training to be a bounty hunter. I was young, and the only other hunter in the family was my aunt, his sister, since his parents got outa the biz a while ago. It was strange, but he said it was what was best, that I needed to be ready for anything. He said it was an honorable path, so y'know what? Damn right I signed up. I wanted to make him proud.

He began training me with a blade when I was eight. Now, like I said, I was shit with the gun when I first started, and it was a pain to become the crackshot I am now. But I’ll never forget the look on pop’s face when I began blade training. Said it was like a fish in water. He was proud of me that day. To be honest, it was weird to hear it.

I grew up, I did my training, took my classes, and earned my fair share of scars. And I never once allowed my family history to dictate my grades, or my success in school. Every grade, every achievement, and every damn accommodation I got was because I busted my ass. It’s all I knew how to do, really, since I was a kid: work hard, and you get what you give.

… But somethin’ wasn’t right. I was gettin’ older, I was questioning why mom was still with my dad, their arguments. What my dad was workin’ on, why he was gettin’ so damn hard on me. But I got nothin’. And ya know what? Somethin’ about his attitude began to send chills down my spine. It didn’t seem right.

Just as I was preparin’ to take off, my younger cousin, Renji… His father had been killed years prior, but of all the bad luck, they got his mom, too, my aunt Jun. Sucks, man. He was a good kid. A good fighter. Shit with a blade for a while, but a damn crackshot. He stayed with us a while, but my dad, he… Started him on a training regiment too. Said we needed to be ready for anything.

I couldn’t leave him. Not Renji, not with my dad. I busted my ass during the day to help him, and even took the occasional bounty to save up money to get the hell outa there.

… Shoulda been nosier when I got the chance.

Ren had really hurt himself - dad didn’t give a shit. Never did, once we were older. I was rummaging through my dad’s shit for a new first aid kit, and I… Shit, man, I shoulda known.

I couldn’t understand the papers - there were a lot of words I couldn’t understand, Ren’s the smarter one, he would’ve. But all I could make out, was that my dad was contactin’ some woman, arranging the deaths of Ren’s parents. Somethin’ about needing custody because Ren’s “DNA sequence was the most compatible.”

I couldn’t look Ren in the face. I couldn’t even say anything to him. God dammit, I wish I woulda said somethin’.

My dad, the sick bastard… Told us he had one test left for us, one final struggle. Next thing I knew, I had a bag over my head, and Ren was screamin’, shouting that it hurt, that his blood was on fire. I fought, and struggled, and panicked before I was able to get loose of the bindings.

There was some… Syringe, near Ren, not like one I’ve ever seen. It was empty, but left the nastiest mark on Ren. He was writhing, crackles of electricity sparking around his body. As I knocked the last mook that held him down, I felt the worst pain ever in the back of my neck.

I was next - my own skin felt like it was on fire, and the lights became blinding. Black… mist trailed from my skin, and I felt like I felt every particle of it.

That was the second time my father told me he was proud. Proud that I actually survived. Well… I survived. Made damn sure he barely did.

Last I saw of dear old dad, he was a bloodied mess on the floor, until I carried my cousin out.

We wiped our records, traveled the country and got as far away from him as possible. I never wanna see that damn guy again. I didn’t want Ren to. I needed to protect him.

Can’t begin to tell you how much shit Ren n’ I have been through since then. He, uh… Found out. Renji found out that I knew, and, uh… It was bad, man. He looked about ready to kill me, but instead, he just… Went out to kill the old man, instead. I told him not to go. But he pretty much told me to piss off an’ let him do his thing.

So i did, but…  God. I was scared. I thought I lost him. I mean - who even survives that? I just… Thought he was dead, and then he just turns up, like nothin’ happened? But you can tell. You can look in a man’s eyes and tell when he’s seen things. When he’s changed.

Next couple of years went by well. Renji opened up to Vera and I more. We got into contact with Naoko and Fahy again - they had actually been lookin’ for us. They handle our jobs, now. Much more reliable than the two of us.

Even when Renji caught wind of the woman my pop hired to kill his parents, you could tell he was determined. When he came back half-dead, I knew he’d want another shot. And i was ready to tie him down to the damn bed, but the weirdest shit happened. Vera just told me to let him go.

… Renji and I have been with each other for as long as I can remember. We’ve had each other’s backs through hell and back, and I wouldn’t have anyone else watchin’ my back over that lightnin’ rod. And… I never realized that sometimes, I had him on a tight leash. I mean, alls I’ve ever wanted was to protect him. No one else would. But… She was right.

So, he left, after gettin’ his ass kicked by her - by Yukimura, the cold killer. And it was months until I ran into him again - wearin’ that damn mask again, still goin’ by the Reaper. Feh. He always was a fan of the dramatic. Anyway - Nao sent me, Vera and Fahy on a job to take out the last remnants of the whitecoats that were responsible for our gifts. But, damn, we weren’t prepared for her.

Primula Aoki. Renji’s little sister. My sick father decided to take she… well. They used her. She had… all of it, man. My shadow manipulation, Ren’s bioelectric conductivity, Fahy’s freaky omnivision. And she had some ruttin' magic. Could probably put an icicle through my damn head. But, Renji got through to her. An’ now our little circle of misfits and freaks keeps growin’. She’s a good kid. Sweet. Damn talented in music.

We began to realize that… yeah, we do a lot of bad stuff to bad people, for good people, but. Vee and I thought, ‘we can do more. We can do better.’

So we did. We made Vermilion. We still take bounties, do private security and body guard work. But we also help people with fixing, building, maintaining - anyone anyone needs, we help with. 

That’s all, I’m done talkin’ to you. So, either get me that drink, or you can skedaddle. Odds are, one or two people in here are lookin’ to kill me. Best for you to not get caught in the crossfire.“

powers / abilities: 

Shadow manipulation - Afton can create, shape and manipulate darkness and shadows. By itself, darkness is mostly used to cloud everything into total darkness, but by accessing a dimension of dark energy it can be channeled to a variety of effects, both as an absence of light and a solid substance. Abilities include:

Shadow walking: Afton is able to traverse through shadows and dark areas in a 100 yard radius.

Umbral dome: Afton can create a dome of dark energy that completely sucks out any natural or artificial light - it’s a double edged sword, as his own allies cannot see, as well. Only Afton is able to traverse the darkness.

Tangible wisps: Afton can create tangible wisps of shadows that can be used for blunt or bladed objects.

Enhanced vision at night: While it isn’t complete night vision, Afton does have a bit of a natural edge when traversing in the dark. Think of it as the brightness was dialed up one or two times - not total night vision. 

inherent abilities:

Incredible swordsman - he is savage, ruthless, and efficient with any bladed weapon. 

trained in several forms of martial arts, mixed or otherwise, including styles such as judo, daito ryu jiu jitsu, taekwando, and krav maga.

 enhanced biological functions: the serum injected in afton severely altered his natural genetic makeup. his body functions are not superhuman, but much stronger than your average person, such as but not limited to:

muscle strength and density: afton’s muscles begin to repair quicker than a normal person, and the process to repair and fuse muscle fibers together are significantly thicker and stronger. he’s certainly no hercules but his strength isn’t anything to pass off as standard.

healing wounds: while afton still bleeds and heals like anyone else, his body reacts quicker and more intensely to identifying, and closing wounds. hemostasis to close the wound begins quicker, the blood cells travel quicker to create collagen and the other tissues needed to form scar tissue, and the strengthening of the tissue also happens quicker. while he doesn’t heal instantly (still far from it) a minor cut that would normally take a day or two to heal only takes hours; a broken bone that would take 3 months to heal might only take one and a half, a laceration would only take a week or two instead of several. again, he is not invincible, not even close, but his body’s cellular makeup works fast. 

alcoholic consumption; the enzymes in afton’s liver begin breaking down the acetaldehyde into acetic acid much quicker, requiring afton’s body do, if desired, consume more alcohol in order to feel it’s effects. 

items / weapons:

Taurus Raging Bull - An absolute hand cannon, Afton carries around an 8-cylinder Taurus raging Bull that uses .454 casul rounds. Thankfully, the only reason he carries it around is because his confidence in his accuracy actually matches his real accuracy. 

Ninjato - A 24 inch short straight sword, crafted by an old family friend known for their masterful work in bladed weaponry. Afton takes care of this blade as if it were his child. 

Amaya - a show of his caring side, Afton took in a chocolate lab puppy he found diving through garbage. She’s about 4 years old, but is hardly pushing ~55lbs/25 due to being the runt. Suffice to say, she’s forever puppy size. 

starting ability: shadow manipulation

starting item: taurus raging bull

extra: 

Paternal instincts rolled a D20 if you’re a minor he WILL politely ask if you need a homecooked meal and a supervised walk home. His nickname is Aftdad for a reason.

Goodness gracious his voice is more gravelly than sandpaper being dragged down an asphalt driveway.

body is littered with scars, most prominent being the wound over his heart, the burn mark near his neck tattoo, and a scar down the other side of his neck. 

Lots of tattoos. heavily tattooed right arm, sleeved in east-asian street art from his hometown. gaelic symbol of strength on left side of his neck, under his ear. 

has a pendant necklace held by a dark leather cord - half moon sigils are carved into it, an obsidian stone embedded in the middle. it was given as a 30th birthday gift from his friend, magdalena-orion hayes - he rarely ever takes it off. It’s only value is sentimental.

He is my one(1) cishet muse and even then I’m unsure about the het. 

6’2 but his posture is as straight(?) as he is. Creates almost an intimidating aura with it. 

discord id: .kagejin.

passcode: i love the way the bg is written

[humancomedy]

Human Comedy: Humanity - 9

Nazuna: ...Phew. Great job, everyone~♪

Location: Repayment Festival Stage (Ra*bits)

Nazuna: ...Phew. Great job, everyone~♪

That was a fantastic performance. There really isn't anything more I can teach you.

Mitsuru: Nii~chan, heeelp... The second the curtain fell, Hajime-chan broke down and started crying~!

Hajime: Hic...ghh... u-uuu...uweeeh...

Nazuna: Oh jeez, he's really crying like a baby... There, there, let it all out. The curtain's down, so the audience can't see you anymore.

Hajime: Uuu... Nii~chan...! Nii~chan, Nii~chan, Nii~chan!

Nazuna: Mhm. What's the matter, Hajime-chin?

Hajime: Hic... I'm so sorry for crying! Thank you so much for working so hard until the very end! From now to forever, Nii~chan will always be the ideal person I strive to be!

At home, I'm the oldest brother... So I always try my best to be the responsible one, to be a good kid...

But I came to Yumenosaki Academy, and I got my own Nii~chan.

It was such a relief, and I was so... happy, every single day! So, Nii~chan...

Uweeeh! Tomoya-kun~!

Tomoya: Why me!?

Man, you really can't help it, huh Hajime? There, there♪

You haven't changed at all when it comes to stuff like this... Wait, but you only used to cry like this when we were alone, so I guess you've actually changed a lot?

Thank you so much, Nii~chan.

You wouldn't guess it just by looking by him, but he likes to put up a front and act like a good kid, so he never does anything that might cause trouble or bother anyone.

But now, he's found a bunch of people that he’s comfortable enough around to show this side of himself, where he lets down his guard and cries his heart out…

I just think that's great for him.

I mean, I dunno if I'm qualified to say something like that...

But thank you, really. Mitsuru already said this on stage, but this is really all we need.

Just thanks. We don't need anything else.

Ahaha... I guess when it's not a play on stage, I'm the kinda guy who doesn't cry during times like this.

I just can't stop smiling for some reason~ Because I'm just so happy.

There's no reason for me to cry, so I'm smiling.

Nii~chan... Thanks for all your hard work, all these three years.

Mitsuru: Nii~chan Nii~chan! I love you, Nii~chan! Mwah mwah♪

Tomoya: What are you doing, Mitsuru...? It's our final performance, so we gotta show Nii~chan that we can be responsible and grown-up so that he won’t worry about us, y'know?

Mitsuru: But... But I'll miss him~! I know it's not like we won't get to see each other ever again, but...

But I'll still miss him...

Nii~chan, once you graduate, feel free to call me! I'll always be willing to run to you at the speed of light!

We might have to live far away from each other, but our hearts will always be together, forever and ever!

Just you wait! We'll become even more famous, and show up on TV aaall the time!

And even if we can't see your face, we'll wave at you with smiles on our faces!

When we do that, you should wave back too, Nii~chan! You should go, “Long time no see! How have you guys been doing? Are you working hard?”

With a gentle smile on your face, just like you always do...!

Uu...uweeeh...!

Tomoya: D-Don't start crying too, Mitsuru... M-Maybe I'm gonna cry too after all...

A-Anyway, before we mess this up! Nii~chan, we got you a present to celebrate your graduation! Please accept it...!

Nazuna: Ohhh? I mean, sure, but... We’re gonna get in the way of the next performers, so I think we should stop standing around here chatting and head backstage instead, okay~?

Repayment Festival isn't just for us, after all. Besides, this year was relatively smooth-sailing for me, anyway~...

I'm surprisingly feeling refreshed, like I don't have any regrets or unfinished business.

I feel like a mom who just successfully gave birth.

The good kid, the bad kid, the normal kid, every single one of you... You're all my precious darling children.

Grow up big and strong, and be wholesome and happy, Ra*bits~♪

Hajime: We will! Ahh~ my tears are finally starting to dry! My eyes feel so stiff, like they're starting to dry up...!

Anyway, Nii~chan! A bouquet for you, from all of us♪

Mitsuru: Go on, take it, Nii~chan! We all saved up money together to buy a big bouquet of flowers for you!

We let Hajime-chan choose all the flowers for us, since he’s the one who knows a bunch about flower language!

I put a whole lot of my feelings into these flowers! Decorate your home with 'em, Nii~chan♪

Hajime: Fufu. At first, I was worried that it might just be a waste of space for you, since live flowers would wilt...

But you don't seem like the type of person who likes pressed or dried flowers either.

We thought you'd prefer some fresh flowers that are full of life.

Tomoya: Mhm. And it feels like something you'd give on White Day, so it fits the occasion, doesn't it? And because it's that kind of season, we even got a little seasonal discount~♪

Nazuna: Ahaha. You didn't need to tell me that. We're not a weak unit constantly struggling with money anymore. ...Thanks, guys.

Fufu. I'm getting a little shy, what with receiving flowers and all. It's so pretty~ and it smells so nice...♪

Ahh... What do I even do with all this happiness?

← prev ❖ all ❖ next →

[luminous-shifting-vibes]

actual fucking quotes from the shiftblr coffeehouse discord server

out of context of course, what do you take me for? a sane person?

"they made lightning mcqueen hot"

"inch resting"

"Nix: Cars (2006) several people are typing..."

"im evaporating"

"enjoy precipitation"

"tow mater is more attractive than lightning mcqueen/hj"

"lightning mcqueen looks like he would call me a slur"

"why did I come back to a discussion regarding the attractiveness of vehicles"

"lark is the braincell of shiftblr tbh"

"you all need some grass in your life"

"me over here simping for block men and now literal cars"

"didn't nick wilde commit fraud canonically"

"i have no strong opinions on whether or not nick wilde is attractive"

"I AM AROMANTIC AND I AM NOT IMMUNE TO NICK WILDE"

"I am bisexual and I. Am not into Nick Wilde based on a simple fact he looks like he will drink all my pepsi and call me names"

"What is shiftbkr but not a bunch of simps"

"cries in Bianca Monroe"

"listen i have a folder called gayass

it is mostly pictures of kyoka jiro and virgil sanders"

"Nick Wilde x Reader where he steals your car 📷 carjacker to lovers AU 📷"

"he says "mama i like to step on keyboard""

"MY MOM JUST WALKED IN AND I HAD TO TELL HER I WAS LOOKING AT LIGHTING MC QUEEN HUMAN FANART"

"crab walks away"

""Y/N..." Nick whispered into your ear. "Your car...is a Honda Civic, right?" You looked up at Nick with a baffled expression. "Nick, my beloved? Whatever are you talking about?" "Just asking..." He said as he let you out of his embrace. "Hey, wanna see a magic trick, babe?" Your eyes sparkled. "Really, Nick? Of course!" Nick smiled. "Ok, close your eyes!" You giggled and closed your eyes, waiting for Nick to tell you to open up. Instead, you heard the loud rumble of a car starting up, and you open your eyes. Nick has stolen your car, and he has driven off into the sunset..."

"did y'all know his name used to be canonically Montgomery--he changed it to lightning mcqueen to get rid of his past"

"That is my exit number"

"cars trauma arc"

"wait do y'all know about car jesus" "as if jesus wasn't a ford focus in the bible"

"oh yall do not want to know about the trauma in my cars dr lmao"

"Dewit tau style babey make Lightning McQueen outlive everyone and stalk their reincarnations"

"Do they baptize other cars in like gasoline then"

"there is a pope car in the cars universe which means car jesus died for cars sins"

"NOT THE BOOMER MEMES"

"-lays facedown on the floor while caramelldansen plays-"

"like im serious how many of you guys endorse me falling face down on my floor" (NOT THE SAME PERSON AS PREVIOUS QUOTE)

"I will be Tall and no one can stop me"

"is a soft floor?"

"stop I thought faceplant meant like a succulent in the shape of a face instead of falling onto your noggin for a solid 10 seconds"

"Touch some grass??? What about eating grass"

"what if for every employee of the month i just printed out really horrible boomer memes"

"what ab smoking grass /j"

"Can the grassdirt smoothie be a special in the cafe"

"PLEASE IM ROLLING ON THE FLOOR REWRITINH THE DECLARATION OF INDEPENDENCE WHIKE SPEEDRUNINT MINECRAFT"

"you have to get good dirt from like the middle of a pennsylvanian forest for it to taste good though"

"I ate a four leaf clover as a kid cause i thought it would make me lucky"

"guys how do i see the mee6 leaderboard"

"I used to think i was half dragon and I ate plants out of sidewalk cracks"

"i think i punched someone"

"my parents told me to stop doing that so I looked at them and ate a flower"

"I ate grass when I was 9 bc I read warrior cats and thought I was a medicine cat ....................."

"bees are just spicy flies"

"I had a mental breakdown when I was three cause I didn’t know how to turn off a phone"

"My mom drank a bee once"

"when I was a baby I kinned ink sans."

"bro who here find the yellow hat man from curious george fine as heck 📷📷📷"

"mY LUNGSSSSSS"

"no one topping Him"

"I like em big"

"I think Moto Moto has no game like move over hunky boy I could beat you 1v1 Roblox Arsenal 📷📷📷"

"If you didnt have a crush on springtrap, jeff the killer, or Underfell/Gaster/Error sans don't talk to me /j"

"LOOK THEY'RE BOTH DILFS WITH ABS THAT WOULD FIGHT GOD"

"ZORO IS BANNED"

"Guys please help I found my old fnaf fanart from when I was 8 I'm in literal tears"

"OH NO BOT MY FIFTH GRADE HAMILTON PHASE"

"The worst attraction ive ever had has to be Sombra Overwatch"

"My family is like "save all ur art so I can sell it when you're famous" I literally could not sell this if I tried"

"screaming puppet"

"I just remembered Ive drawn overwatch/hamilton crossover fanart"

"my hermit crabs ate each other again"

"we're cannibals ????"

"having me here is a curse you have inflicted on yourselves and I for one am glad for it <3" "scitters around like a crab in anticipation"

"CARB DAY"

"WE NEED TO HAVE A WATCH OARTY"

"hey y'all ill be right back i have to throw away a crab carcass"

"if I watch cars I'm going to start laughing in the middle of it nonstop just because the word cars is funny and also cars are funny like how do you move silly little metal box with rubber circles"

"Lark asleep post catboy pitbul"

"Mwista Wowldwide! Nya!" "hermit crab 2: electric boogaloo"

"Is that why your name is chaos"

"manifest the crab power!!"

"cool dex fact: i can't read 📷"

"sighs adds to worship these entities list"

"with a knife <3"

"yeah and if he betrays me I could probably throw him across the atlantic ocean"

"give me his eyes"

"my good citizen i am a- wait no im nonbinary nvm"

"it worked on a fish idk what to tell you"

"what is gender??? Is that a board game?? If so can I be apples to apples that one's my favorite"

"CHUTES AND LADDERS"

"anyways actually my gender is Candyland"

"Oh god romes the destroyer of friendships/j"

"i am a simple gay i see math i run in the opposite direction survival instincts 101"

"math my beloathed"

"algebra makes me want to rip open a bag of swedish fish and swallow them whole"

"cackles in they're au characters and this will be very fun"

"pog !!!! me too ksajgks one of my drs is a sanders sides au"

"Is that bipper"

"tumblr sexyman"

"Good because he’ll fuck u up if u hurt a child"

"I want a wing-suit"

"looks like a bean would poison someone"

"my hermit crabs are cannibals what can i say"

"sonic the hedgehog kinnie"

"get yourself a man who is capable of the most ungodly actions but won't do them because of their morality owo"

"tell him he can steal my wallet"

"eyes"

"idk about y'all but I need blueberry sweet tea to live"

"y'know the red souls from soul eater i really want to eat those"

"but like only respectable crimes like stealing from elon musk"

"You can go cultbashing with he!"

"He acts like a flamboyant gay man, but if a flamboyant gay man was straight."

"Simp Satan 📷"

"definitely arson"

"They look like they enjoy lemon squares and other lemon desserts"

"Satan is all-powerful but he spends most of his time building honeymoon locations because he is convinced that the protag loves him"

"bc shes the reincarnation of his dead wife or something i guess"

annd here's a quote from our very own dream (@shiftingwastaken) that sums this post up:

"shiftblr but context makes it worse"

[the-breath-in-air]

Fixing "Boy Erased" (2018)

I recently decided to watch Boy Erased (2018) again, now that we're a couple years out from its initial release (and hype). And I came away with some thoughts.

First, something I think worked. You know that scene near the end, when Jared (Lucas Hedges) is trying to leave the conversion camp and he's racing through corridors and whatnot. That whole sequence works, but there's one moment that really stands out.

Jared attempts to get his phone and Michael (one of the 'camp counselors') tries to physically wrestle it away from him. There's a bit of a fight but eventually Jared makes his way to the bathroom and he calls his mom to come take him away. He then emerges from the bathroom and says to Victor Sykes (who runs the camp), "If you, or anyone else puts their hands on me, I have witnesses." Victor puts up his hands and says, "Nobody's gonna put their hands on you. Why would anybody do that? Come and sit. We're gonna wait for your mom, okay?" Then there's a hard cut to this:

Victor Sykes and Brandon literally laying their hands on Jared and praying. And I love that juxtaposition because it brings to light the violence inherent in this situation. They're restraining him through enforced religious acts. There's violence in this prayer.

And on top of that, it serves as a pretty good metaphor for the whole film. Jared's parents (especially his mother) believe they're helping but really they're hurting. They can't see the violence of their actions in sending him to the camp.

If only the rest of the film was working on this level.

Problem the first: Audience as observer. The film is really about observing its subject, Jared, as he experiences these events. But it isn't about giving us any insight into his perspective or interiority as he does so. The camera is looking at Jared more often that it is revealing to us what he's seeing. Perhaps the most obvious example of this issue is with the perfume ad scene. Jared is on a run and he comes across a perfume ad on the side of a bus stop with a bare chested buff guy. The camera shows us the ad, and then the rest of the scene has the camera (and thus, the audience) placed some distance away as we see Jared first touch the ad, then throw a rock at the ad, and then scream "fuck you" at it repeatedly. The ad itself isn't salacious enough to illicit that kind of response in the average audience-goer, and the camera is so disconnected from Jared's experience that we aren't really gaining insight into why this ad is affecting him in such a strong way. It ends up making it so that scene really does not work.

This isn't to critique Lucas Hedges's performance in that scene. It's more to say that all the other elements of that scene make it feel ridiculous - because the audience has not been guided toward viewing that ad in the same way that Jared does in that moment.

The second problem: Casting. To be absolutely clear, this is not a knock against any of the actors performances. On the contrary, I think everyone was pretty dang exceptional. Rather, it's more a conversation about casting choices. Two of those choices really stand out as somewhat misguided: Xavier Dolan as Jon and Emily Hinkler as Lee.

Turns out Emily Hinkler is a nonbinary actress. Lee (the character) is a cis guy who is conspicuously unmasculine. (If you've seen the movie - he's the one who gets hit in the head with a baseball). Casting a nonbinary actress as a cis boy at a conversion camp feels a bit off on it's own in that a conversion camp would be forcing people to adhere to assigned genders at birth. But I could get behind it as a sort of statement, like, a casting decision as direct opposition to the enforced gender binary of a conversion camp. i.e. Why should the movie adhere to the oppressive gender binary that the camp would? However, by casting a nonbinary actress as the least conventionally masculine character - it actually feels like it ends up reinforcing the binary. Lee's defining trait is that he's small and unmanly and, afaik, he's the only one of the male characters who is not portrayed by a cis man.

My issue with Xavier Dolan's casting is much simpler: Jon feels like he was written as a teenager and Xavier Dolan was approaching 30 when this was filmed. Maybe it wouldn't have bugged me so much if I didn't already know who Xavier Dolan was when watching the movie? Like, maybe if you watch it without knowing the actor's age, it works better? But also, the character feels like a teen but isn't explicitly stated to be a teen. So whenever he was on screen I kept wondering if actually part of Jon's situation is meant to be that he is 30 but stuck in a sort-of adolescence due to his relationship with his abusive father. Or did they just cast Xavier Dolan to portray a teenager?

This brings me to the third problem: Not enough of the ensemble. Jared, and thus the audience, spends proportionally, little screen time with the other people at the camp. They are rarely shown talking to each other - especially outside the restrictive observation of the camp's 'counselors.' This could be part of the point - i.e. that the camp is so isolating - but that isolation wasn't really highlighted by the camera/scenes/dialogue...so it really feels more like it's just an oversight. The movie focuses on Jared and his individual story and so the rest just fell by the wayside.

This is really unfortunate because there are some (potentially) great characters in there, especially Jon and Gary. Jon went through the program once before and is now back for a second time. We don't know what happened to make him come back. He appears to be 30-ish but he's staying at a hotel with his abusive father. He is completely invested in the program and treats his sexuality like an addiction. He has even taken it upon himself to forego all physical contact with other men (not even a handshake). His self-loathing is at once horrifying and heartbreaking.

In contrast, Gary (Troye Sivan) knows the entire program is bullshit, but he's playing along for his own survival. He's over 18; he lived with his boyfriend for a year prior to coming to the camp. So that begs the question of how his family convinced him to enter to the program. Also, Gary's so invested in his own survival, that he stays silent and is complacent in the abuse and violence he witnesses against others in the camp. He is both a victim and a bystander (at times).

I think this film would've really benefited from spending more time with these characters (as well as Sarah, portrayed by Jesse LaTourette, and Cameron, portrayed by Britton Sear) in the camp and seeing how they all interacted with each other. Give us a sense of their different contexts and perspectives - and give us a better sense of the ways that conversion camps disempower the people sent there (even people like Gary, who knows it's bullshit). It's the thing that makes all the other movies about conversion camps work so well.

Which brings us to the fourth problem: the ending. If we spend more time with the ensemble, we'd either end up with a really long movie or we'd have to cut out something else. Well, folks, we can cut about 10 minutes off the end. Everything after the dinner Jared has with his mother post-escape can go. The climax of the film is when Jared finally decides to leave the camp. The resolution comes when his mother places herself in opposition to Jared's father (which she had never done before) and decides that she's going to take Jared home. And the emotional resolution comes when she admits to Jared that they made a mistake and that they harmed him by sending him to the camp.

Everything after that is extraneous. We don't really need to see Jared living in a city with a boyfriend, or see him begin to reconcile with his father. His relationship with his father was never the emotional core for the film. Boy Erased is, in some ways, a movie about self-actualization and that's the sort of movie that's best to end with something a bit open-ended. Y'know...a sort of end-that's-just-the-beginning kind of thing. Because the story of Jared falling in love and dating and moving out and gaining the self-confidence to confront his father - well that's a whole other movie. And here it gets shoved into the epilogue, which does the whole thing a real disservice.

Then there are the informational cards at the end. Two stick out as being particularly frustrating. One, "The real Victor Sykes left L.I.A. in 2008. He now lives in Texas, with his husband," feels irrelevant and unnecessary. The audience cares about what happened to Gerrard Conley (who wrote the story and whom Jared is based off of). But why do we care about what happened to the real guy who ran the camp? We don't...except for the jab about him now being married to a man - which feels like it's a more significant point for the cis straight people in the audience than for anyone queer. Turns-out-ex-gay-pastor-was-actually-just-gay-the-whole-time is not revelatory, I gotta say.

Then there's also this:

The emphasis about conversion therapy "practiced on minors," feels a bit disconnected from the film we just watched - which emphasized how abusive and traumatizing it is, even for adults. And in the U.S., all states currently legally allow conversion therapy for anyone 18+. Only Washington D.C. has banned it. And that, to me, is equally egregious, yet it isn't mentioned. The film itself challenges the notion that it's somehow okay for this to be practiced on adults because it's ostensibly their "choice," and then the info cards at the end shy away from that stance by focusing on kids.

I think the thing I find most frustrating about this movie, is the wasted potential. As I said at the beginning of this, there are some moments that really stand out in how they use the medium to convey meaning. There are some choices in how the film uses light and brightness (or lack thereof), that are pretty dang good, too. But ultimately, it's a film I feel so detached from and I think some of what I explained above is part of why.

[super-unpredictable98]

Hard Candy (~Misfits AU~)

Chapter 25: The Day We Killed (Fake) Jesus

Warning: Strong language, alcohol, mention of drugs and r*pe, violence and death, discussions regarding religion.

(Hard Candy Masterlist)

The record label building was proper posh, I felt a little out of place as I waited for my meeting to start. Every single decorative item in that office seemed like it was worth my entire flat. The floor was shiny, almost metallic, reflecting the lights from the chandelier.

- Hello, Lydia - a tall man in his 50's came through the door like a ray of light, a true explosion of energy - we spoke on the phone, I'm Brendan. 

- Hi - I shook his hand, suddenly feeling very underdressed as I admired his suit.

- So, did you get my e-mail? About the contract? 

- Yeah, I just have a few questions.

- Shoot - he leaned back.

- First, I'd like to know about the payment, the document said I'd get royalties, but what does that exactly mean?

- That means for every time your album is sold, your song is downloaded or streamed, you'll get some money. We can negotiate the amount, talk to the music publisher... You'll also get paid for your studio time and live performances, you can either get a percentage from each ticket sold or a flat rate, it depends. 

- Ok, so how long do you think it would take for me to get my album out?

After that meeting I ran to the bar, Nathan had texted me to let me know everyone was there. I ran like a lightning bolt and jumped in his arms as soon as I arrived.

- How was it, baby? - He looked at me hopeful.

- I've got a deal! - I shouted at the top of my lungs.

Everyone screamed and celebrated with me, especially Nathan. 

- I can't believe this! - He lifted me up and spun around a few times - This is perfect!

- Congrats! - Kelly pulled me into a hug.

- I should thank you, Kel, I couldn't have done it without you... And you Si! 

- I'm so proud of you, Peanut! - Simon kissed my forehead.

- Can't believe I'm friends with a celebrity! - Alisha jumped around.

- Well, not yet - I chuckled - but I have my first performance on Christmas eve, just to test the waters so we can get the production of my first album started. Of course, you're all invited... There's only one thing: I need a stage name, I can't go in there as Lydia Bellamy, mom and dad would freak.

- Why don't you just go by Lyds? Or Lyddie? - Alisha suggested. 

- Lyddie sounds good - Curtis nodded.

- I like it, but what would my last name be? - I chewed on my bottom lip.

- You could use my last name - Nathan shrugged - y'know it'll be yours too  sooner or later, so why not just take it?

Kelly nearly choked with the implication of what he just said, everyone looked at me agape, I felt like I could just faint or explode or both... Did he really just say that? 

- I guess that's it then - Kelly said - you'll be Lyddie Young!

- I have to admit, it does sound very cool - Nikki mumbled.

- Oh my God, I can't believe this is happening! - I was on the verge of tears - Is there any way this night could get any better?

- Well, we have some news too - Curtis smiled.

- We sold our powers! - Nikki cheered as if that was something good.

- Hold on, what? - My excitement melted away - All of you?

- Yeah - Simon seemed a bit upset too - except for Nathan.

- I might be stupid, but I know you'd kill me and without my immortality, I'd be dead for good - he joked.

- Oh, thank God - I sighed and leaned against him - but what the fuck were you guys thinking? 

- We each got 20 grand - Kelly showed me a pile of money - come on, can't be a little happy for us?

- I don't think this is right, but... If you guys are happy, who am I to bring you down?

- How about some shots then? - Curtis grabbed a bottle of tequila from the bar.

- Now that you're goin' travellin' suddenly you're all cool about handin' out free drinks - Nathan cocked an eyebrow as be poured salt on my chest.

- I'm so looking forward to not having to listen to your shit... - Curtis handed him  the shot and some lime.

- I'll miss you too - Nathan in one fluid motion drank the tequila, licked the salt from my chest, and shoved the lime in his mouth.

- So you and Nikki are going away? - I did my shot as well.

- Yeah, we're going to Thailand - she took Curtis' hand.

- But don't worry, we won't leave until after your performance - Curtis assured me.

- Empty the till and the safe - an unexpected voice coming from the door made us all jump.

A disturbed looking guy pointed a gun at us, he looked really scared, maybe he was on drugs or some shit...

- Yeah, good one, mate - Nathan scoffed.

- Just give us the money! - The robber yelled.

- We're not giving you shit! - I got up - So you better piss off, man!

- Lydia, what are you doing? - Simon tried to stop me.

The man pointed the gun at me, but Nathan stepped in, using his body as a shield.

- D'you t-t-think I'm joking? - The robber stuttered.

- Actually... I really couldn't give a fuck - Nathan said, defiantly.

- Back off! - The man seemed more afraid to shoot than Nathan was of getting shot.

- Go ahead - he took a few steps - shoot me! I'm immortal...

Just as the man pulled the trigger, I quickly made a force field around all of us. He stared at the translucent blue veil in disbelief.

- Kel, call the cops - I looked back.

Before she could even dial the number, the thief ran out as fast as he could. I waited a few seconds before lifting the field surrounding us, just in case the guy changed his mind.

- That was amazing, Lyds! - Simon hugged me tightly.

- It was really hot... - Nathan joined, embracing me.

- Hot? You just stared at the barrel of a gun and said you didn't give a fuck! Don't tell me about hot.

- Oh, so you liked that, did ya? - He purred into my ear while nuzzling my hair.

- Can you imagine what would happen if we didn't have our powers? You guys are insane for selling them... - I looked around - No money in the world could make me sell mine.

- Yeah... Maybe we did fuck up, didn't we? - Curtis grimaced.

——————————————————-

- So keep practicing these progressions, repeat them until you can do it with your eyes closed.

- Hey, rockstar - Nathan came into the living room - Barry called, he said it was urgent.

I said goodbye to my student and wrapped my arms around Nathan's neck.

- Alright, what was it? Did they get the powers back?

- No, turns out the fella wanted 40 grand for each power, and Nikki's and Alisha's have already been sold.

- Shit... Well, for Alisha I guess it's not a big deal, and Nikki kept teleporting out of nowhere, but the others must be pissing themselves.

- Yeah, so we need to meet them at the Community Center right now, apparently that crazy cunt from last night was doin' it for Jesus.

- That nutter we've seen at the patio the other day?

- Exactly, he bought a fuckload o'powers and told everyone he's Jesus Christ. He tried to attack Alisha earlier usin' her power against her.

- Son of a bitch... Let's go then.

Nathan and I ran to the Center as fast as we could, the others arrived shortly after. We had no idea where this fucker could be, but something told me he had something to do with the soft moaning coming from the locker room.

I couldn't believe my eyes when we walked in: that guy from the patio was mindlessly counting his money while a young blonde girl was sucking his cock. That was probably one of the most disgusting things I've ever seen, and I live with Nathan.

- That's him - Alisha pointed. 

- Can I help you? - "Jesus" asked, not bothered at all by our presence.

- Can't go around pretendin' t'be Jesus, what's God gonna say? - Kelly scolded.

- I don't think Jesus was a fan of blowjobs - I mocked.

- I gave my life to him - "Jesus" sneered - I went without money and sex, what a joke... I preached and prayed and no one gave a shit, but then you do a few miracles, everyone thinks you're the messiah.

- Sorry, would you mind gettin' her to stop? - Nathan gestured to the girl on her knees - It's very distracting.

- One of your followers tried to kill us last night! - Curtis shouted.

- You're exploiting the vulnerable - Simon said with disgust.

- Takin' money off people... - Kelly added.

- Sexually assaulting girls - Alisha completed.

- That's the Catholic Church, my love - "Jesus" chuckled.

- He's got a point - Nathan looked at me - when I was growin' up in Ireland if the priests weren't fiddlin' with you, you were one o'the ugly kids...

- Natty - I gulped nervously - please tell me you just got really hot in secondary school...

- So, if we're done here, how about you come with me, sexy thing? - "Jesus" tried to reach for my hand.

- Fuck off, man! That's my girl! - Nathan barked.

- Oh, that's cute...

Next thing I know, "Jesus" managed to grab my hand and a familiar feeling washed over me. That electricity that I felt when Alisha touched me the day after the storm. I had absolutely no control over what I said or did and my senses were completely numbed.

- Let her go! - Simon's scream was the first thing I heard as I came back to my senses.

- Freaky, I like it - "Jesus" flashed me a devilish grin.

- I will finish you... - Curtis gritted his teeth, but before he could even get close to that wanker, he teleported away from the room.

Nathan and Simon were holding me, I was still panting, trying to understand what happened and catch my breath.

- Oh, Lollipop... Oh, sweetheart... - Nathan cringed.

- What the fuck? - Nikki widened her eyes at me.

- What happened? - I asked.

- You said it - Nathan inhaled sharply - the thing.

- Shit! Did I really? 

- Yeah...

- It's ok, we all knew - Kelly tried to console me, but it just made things worse.

- Honestly, that's probably the least weird thing you're attracted to - Alisha looked pointedly at Nathan.

- Kill me now! - I cried, hiding my face in his chest.

- Don't worry, Peanut - Simon rubbed my back gently - no one's gonna say a word. Right, Nikki?

- Sure - she quickly agreed - I didn't even know that was a thing, but to each their own.

- Hey, baby - Nathan brought my chin up so I would look at him - don't cry.

- How can I ever be taken seriously after this? - I whimpered.

- D'you remember when Barry said he wanted to piss on Alisha's tits? That was way worse... By the way, did she ever let you do it, man? - Nathan turned to Simon.

- Shut up, Nathan! - Alisha screeched.

- We need to get the fake Jesus - I quickly got back to my feet.

- I can't believe that guy - Nathan started walking in circles - we may have done sod all with our powers, but we never abused them! We never raped or murdered anyone...

- She raped me - Curtis pointed at Alisha - and we killed loads of people.

- Ok, but we're the good guys, right? - Nathan looked at me for backup.

- Yeah, we're the heroes - I patted his shoulder.

- We can't get him, whenever we get near him he'll just fuck off somewhere else... - Alisha pinched the bridge of her nose.

- We need our powers, we can use this to buy them back - Simon was looking at one of the lockers, filled with cash that "Jesus" probably stole from innocent people.

Without a second thought, Nathan, Simon, and Curtis dragged the locker out of its spot. Nikki, Alisha, Kelly, and I took the other end as we tried to move it outside of the Center. If you ask me, there were better ways to get that money out of there, but at the time no one could think of anything.

- I think that belongs to me - "Jesus" stood in front of us.

- Come get it if you fuckin' want it! - Kelly shouted.

- If the mountain won't come to Muhammad...

- Oh, now he's startin' on the Muslims! - Nathan rolled his eyes.

- Don't make me laugh now, you dick! - I struggled to not let go.

The Jesus guy put both hands out and we started to feel the locker being pulled from our grasp, I can't believe that fucker also has telekinesis! That thing became a tug of war really fast and it seemed like we were losing, until...

- Let go, guys! - I whispered.

- What? Are you insane? - Nathan narrowed his eyes.

- Trust me, do it now!

Thankfully they all trusted me and let go of the locker. It flew like a bullet across the hallway and hit fake Jesus right in the head at full-blown speed. Money was flying everywhere when the door swung open and a few seconds later, we realized that twat was dead. 

- Fuck, I just killed someone! - I uttered in disbelief.

- Welcome to the club - Kelly sighed heavily.

Nathan ran to grab the money, doing a cross sign as he did so, we all looked at him incredulously:

- What? Just in case he really is Jesus... - He shrugged.

- Let's get the money and piss off - I rushed to gather everything, shoving it back in the locker - before the followers notice...

- Now I understand why we didn't tell you what we did to become rich - Nathan chuckled.

- Let's go get our powers back! - Simon exclaimed.

- We can get any powers we want! - My eyes lit up - I want Simon's power!

- No, it's mine! - He countered.

- Not if I get it first - I waved the money obnoxiously in front of him - what are you gonna do? Tell mum?

- Don't you dare... Blossom!

- What did you just call me? - I gasped.

- Oh, this is gonna be good... - Nathan giggled, sitting on top of the locker.

- Blossom! - Simon teased, ready to run away.

- I'm gonna kill you, Barry! - I chased him down the hall like a maniac while he laughed hysterically.

After I gave my brother a good beating (no, I didn't actually beat him, it's alright), we took the locker to the spot where this guy, Seth, bought and sold powers. 

That place looked like it came right out of a mafia movie, it was terrifying, but I've been there before... I mean, after.

- Hey, man, d'you have like a menu or somethin'? - Nathan asked.

- Here's the list of powers I have available - Seth gave us a piece of paper.

- Let's see... - I ran my eyes over it - Here! I want instant self-healing and enhanced lung capacity.

- Enhanced lung capacity? - Kelly looked at me confused.

- Can you imagine the long notes I'll be able to sing with this shit? 

- Reality warping... - Nathan mumbled - I think I want this one!  

——————————————————-

- This makes a lot of sense... - I said to Nathan as we arrived at Simon's flat - You never told me you had immortality, you only told me about the reality warping. You used to do the most beautiful things to cheer me up.

- Really? Like what? - Nathan locked arms with me.

- Like fireworks...

- You mean like this? - He snapped his fingers creating tiny colorful explosions right in front of my eyes.

- Yeah - I leaned against his shoulder.

As soon as we walked in, the air was filled with voices, all of them congratulating me on my performance earlier and letting me know "how amazing" it was. 

It did feel great to be on stage, it was like something finally clicked inside of me, that's my calling, it's what I'm meant to do with my life.

- Thank you so much, guys, I'm just happy you all made it - I hugged each one of them.

I couldn't imagine a better way to spend Christmas eve, they were my family, I love them all so much... I never once regretted coming back, but those were the moments that truly made me see that I did the right thing. 

Happiness isn't always gonna come to you, sometimes you need to create your own opportunities and run after something that seems long lost. Sometimes you need to fight all the odds, to break every rule, to make every difficult decision in order to find that one thing that makes you happy.

After an amazing dinner (well, it was just Chinese takeout, but it was amazing...) we all reunited in a circle next to the Christmas tree to open our gifts. 

I got some amazing ones: very nice clothes, rare comic books, collectible action figures and such. When it was Simon's turn, I couldn't believe the size of that box.

- Si... I think this might make the camera I gave you look stupid - I unwrapped it as fast as I could, and couldn't hold back the tears when I finally saw it.

- I thought you might like it, Nathan mentioned you had to sell yours - Simon smiled timidly.

- A blue Fender Stratocaster with a Hot Rod amp - I could barely breathe - that's exactly like that one I had, thank you, Si!

I jumped in his arms and didn't let go until Nathan tapped my shoulder. He was already wearing the new jumper I knitted (it had a huge N on it just like the ones Molly Weasley makes for the kids in Harry Potter), and filming the whole interaction with the cell phone I gave him.

- I think it's my turn - he cocked an eyebrow. 

- Ok, I'm anxious - I turned to him, my legs bouncing nervously.

- It's not as big as Barry's... I think he might be tryin' to compensate for somethin', but I hope you like it.

Nate reached into his pocket and pulled out a tiny blue velvet box, inside there was a ring, a silver ring with the outline of a heart in the center. I had to cover my mouth to keep from screaming, what the hell was happening?

- Nathan, is this a...?

- Well, I think we should probably figure our lives out before we can get married, but you see how the heart is empty in the center? There's a second part that completes it, this ring is a promise. 

- A promise? Of what?

- A promise that I'll love you as long as you let me, that I'll try to make you happy every single day, that I won't leave you for some pregnant girl, that I'll never stop bein' the shameless prick you fell in love with, that I'll never cut these curls you like so much, and that one day, hopefully very soon, I'll marry you. If you take me...

- Of course I will - my vision was blurred by my tears - I love you so much.

- I love you too, Lollipop - he pulled me close into a tender kiss.

- This is the most romantic shit I've ever seen - Kelly was shocked - what happened t'you, Nathan? 

- Well, I need to cuff her before she realizes she's too good for me, am I right? - He put his hand up for a high-five. 

- I guess you are - Kelly purposefully left him hanging.

- Would you look at that? - Nikki taunted - He can be a decent human being after all. 

- I think I'm gonna cry - Alisha fanned her eyes trying to keep her make-up intact.

- Ow, you seriously lost your cool - Curtis teased. 

- Shut up! It's Christmas - Alisha folded her arms and Simon held her.

- Come on, Curtis... It's cute - Si smiled.

- Oh, I almost forgot - Nathan got an envelope from the pile of gifts - there's a second part.

- More? - I gaped, already overwhelmed by part one.

- Yeah, I don't know if you'll like it, but... I did some research. D'you know this fella called Lin-Manuel Miranda?

- Natty... What did you do? - I forgot how to breathe for a second.

- I thought since we're all goin' to New York in the summer and all... We could go to this show, In The Heights, have you ever heard of it? 

Nathan handed me the envelope and inside there were Broadway tickets, great seats, right in the middle of the sixth row.

- NATHAN YOUNG! I can't fucking believe this... This is... Oh my God! I've always wanted to see this show!

- Did I get it right then? 

- You always do, you're the best boyfriend anyone could ever ask for - I ran my fingers through his hair.

- Yeah... Let's not exaggerate - Kelly mocked.

Tag list: @crisis-of-joy​

[deathbydarkelves]

I decided to make playlists for Cathala and Tarinne plus explanations for why I chose each song because I entered one of those ADHD fugue states and if I didn't finish this task I would die

Anyway here are the two links (they're youtube playlists because I don't have spotify. I would obviously recommend using an adblocker if you're just gonna watch on youtube) and the explanations for each song are below the cut :) Each playlist is about an hour long.

For Tarinne’s:

1. Foggy Nights: I consider this her theme so putting it first as a sort of intro only makes sense.

2. Here’s a Health to the Company: I think this works as an example of her general disposition. She’s a people person, and always a fan of singing these sorts of songs in taverns, on ships, or what have you. It also kind of feels like a sendoff to soldiers, which I imagine symbolizes her joining the Sentinel Army and quickly thereafter fighting in the Third War.

3. Wartime Prayers: Somewhat self-explanatory, this is symbolizing her seeing war for the first time, but I also included it because the last line transitions SO WELL into the next song.

4. The Hollow: This song is an intro to an album I've never heard so I don't know the context, but I really love it because it sounds like someone praying to their deity and like I mean c'mon. Elune. Tarinne's praying to Elune to guide her through the war. Do I need to elabo-

5. Wave Walker: KILL DEATH MAIM AHAHAHAHA

6. Isil Elun’falo: Just a super rad fan-made night elf song that's basically "wow we sure do love Elune" said in twenty different ways for four and a half minutes. But it ROCKS and I LOVE it.

7. Chewing Cotton Wool: This song is about losing a loved one (I did have to check but yeah that's what it is) and I use it to symbolize Tarinne losing her mom during the war. The last line, which includes the song's title, I especially like. It's referring to how morticians (apparently) put cotton gauze in a corpse's throat and mouth to keep body fluids in and make the face look more natural. So there's a fun fact for you.

8. See U Soon (Song for Dad): Just a short lofi piece to rest a bit, and it was also chosen because the title's in reference to Tarinne growing closer to her dad after losing her mom. She still visits him at his leathers and furs shop in Stormwind fairly often, especially after dangerous adventures. She just wants to make sure he knows she's alright ;-;

9. No Lullaby: Right back into it with a song that I use to represent Tarinne's general feeling of not being able to go home because it's not there anymore. She's felt like this since the end of the Third War, but it's especially strong since the whole Teldrassil thing. But I like the ending, "who said you're on your own," because it contrasts the repeating of "alone" in the rest of the song. And it's kinda like "hey, listen, you're not the only one who feels like she can't go home." I mean that's probably how basically every single night elf feels right now skxnks

10. The Moss: This song juxtaposes classic fairy tales with scientific facts about the world and I love it to BITS. I'm using it here to represent both Tarinne's love for storytelling but also her sort of... part-time historian/archaeologist/conservator career.

11. Rasputin: I just associate this song with her for some reason and this was the best place to put it.

12. Electric Feel: Moving on to focus more on Tarinne's relationship with Cathala now. This is an extremely great and somewhat 😏 song that I also included because the electricity theme is appropriate because Cathala has lightning powers and y'know it's from Tarinne's perspective or whatever.

13. Bedroom Hymns: You know why this is here.

14. Movement: I can't talk about love songs without talking about Hozier, okay. This is just a nice, slower song to relax a bit with.

15. Never Let Me Go: I have an entire goddamn music video in my head with Cathala and Tarinne for this song and it’s very dramatic and emotional and I had to include this song or I’d die. Basically just listen to near the end of this song when she's repeating the title over and over, and imagine the two of them seeing each other at opposite ends of a battlefield after the dust settles and they rush towards each other and fall to their knees holding on as tightly as they can because they got separated early on and each thought the other was dead. Then you'll know how I feel when I listen to this song.

16. Nothing That Has Happened So Far Has Been Anything We Could Control: First of all I love the title, and second of all there's a big section in the middle (1:49 to 2:47) that I like to interpret as the two of them grappling with the fact that they're not really quite sure who or what they're fighting for anymore. Their people, yeah, but there's so many alliances and semi-permanent enemies and only-on-every-other-thursday-enemies all intertwined and the world is just so very confusing and they're trying to make the best of it. Elf school didn’t include international, interracial politics in its curriculum. It did however include how to properly plant trees, and AP calculus (this is a joke).

17. In Dreams: I like to imagine this song is something the two of them would say to each other, as a way of saying “even when everything we know is gone, even when the world ends, I will still be by your side. And if I’m not, don’t fear, for I will find you.” It makes a nice note to end on :)

For Cathala’s:

1. muse: Just a nice lofi intro to get us into things :) I don't see this song as her theme, like I do with Tarinne and the first song in her playlist, but I like it quite a bit. I don't actually really have a theme for Cathala yet, I'm currently going with a version of Way of the Monk from WoW's OST but I'm still looking for something better.

2. Frogs Singing: I included this because it's about just appreciating nature, which works because night elf and also mindfulness and meditation is a whole thing.

3. Tongues: This is a song about feeling distant from your peers which is like Cathala's whole existence! She's this weird mix of two cultures and ultimately she feels out of place regardless of where she is or who she's with. Also the theme with not understanding what people are saying works because the poor woman had to learn Pandaren from scratch and that shit ain't easy. I think blizz said somewhere probably that Common is just a language that EVERYONE knows inherently because Video Game but that's bullshit in my opinion. I'll allow spells that let you understand foreign languages to an extent (Comprehend Languages from D&D lets you understand the LITERAL meaning only, which I like), but every culture and species in the universe knowing Common is silly if you think about it for more than two seconds.

4. Kung Fu Fighting: I'm legally required to include this song. Also I prefer the Kung Fu Panda version, I'm sorry.

5. Harder Better Faster Stronger: I vicariously experience having a great work ethic through Cathala and that's why this song is here because she has 999 Determination and does Too Many push-ups every day or something idk. I was gonna say "every morning" but I have a headcanon that elves only need to sleep every couple of days (sort of a nod to "elves don't need to sleep at all" from D&D, and to explain why NIGHT elves are active at all hours of the day) so that doesn't work.

6. What's Up Danger: This song is Cathala's whole Vibe. Almost zero threat assessment skills in this woman's brain. If it can be punched, she will punch it.

7. Eye for an Eye: Fairly self-explanatory, it's a song about wanting revenge so... yeah. Checked that box. It was this or The Vengeful One by Disturbed but ultimately The Vengeful One's religious symbolism probably makes it fit better as a Tyrande theme lol ("I'm the hand of god, I'm the dark messiah." Did you mean: the Night Warrior)

8. Survivor: Cathala's survived a lot of shit and this could kinda be her making fun of herself for it because "Gods, man! Don't I deserve a break!"

9. Ashes: Really the reason I include this song is the last chunk (2:42 to the end) because holy shit. Listen, if I was gonna include a song with fire motifs, it was gonna be a somber one like this.

10. Into the West: This can kinda represent Cathala just trying to fucking breathe and recover from Teldrassil. Also works because I dunno it has stuff to do with the elves in LotR, I haven't seen those movies in a while. It sounds nice and is melancholy so I included it.

11. Like Real People Do: Cathala loves Tarinne a lot you guys have I ever menti-

12. Into the Wild: Tarinne changed Cathala's world for the better and she's super fucking grateful she has her by her side. Kinda goes without saying but you know.

13. Chasing the Moon: I have a vague music video in my head for this of them falling in love and it's very cute so there's that. Also it's in this specific spot because hey she may be deeply traumatized but she's still got a fair number of things/people in her life that make her happy so :)

14. Follow My Girl: I've got a theme going in my head that while Tarinne is fairly certain of her place in the world, Cathala is still trying to find hers. She outlived all her connections on Pandaria because Elf Lifespans(tm) and the only members of her family still alive are distant relatives she never knew very well.

15. Wish That You Were Here: This works both to represent Cathala on Pandaria feeling super homesick, and for more recently after Teldrassil. Either way, it's a message to her parents and sister.

16. Mr. Fear: She does her damnedest to hide it but she's absolutely terrified something like Teldrassil's gonna happen again! That fear drives her to do everything in her power to protect who and what she can. As long as they're not Forsaken, cause she's still got her biases, that compassion even extends across faction lines. She never really got the whole Alliance/Horde thing anyway. Innocent people shouldn't have to die, regardless of who or what they are.

17. Ordinary Day: Not to get super out there but I think this song works as symbolizing Cathala really trying to hold on to her faith in Elune, but ultimately feeling pretty abandoned. I mean she can clearly see Elune's influence everywhere. But Elune sure ain't doing Cathala any favors as far as she can tell! It also ends the whole playlist on maybe a bit of an uncertain/open-ended note, because this "losing faith" aspect is a new thing with her and will definitely be something she continues to struggle with for a while. On a related note, I should say Tarinne is still very much devout but she gets what Cathala's feeling and doesn't force anything on her, and vice versa. And Cathala wouldn't become atheist, the night elves aren't monotheistic and she still worships all the other deities, it's just specifically Elune she's a little :/ on.

[jcmorrigan]

001 - Kingdom Hearts

Favorite character: On the villain side: VEXEN IS BEST ORGANIZATION XIII MEMBER. Shoulda stayed evil, though. I like it when he complains and screams about everything and hates everyone. He's one of my favorite villains, just, like...in general. So fun to write. Also attached to Demyx, but I actually liked him more in III than II because it reminded me of my rawr lolspeek weeb days when I f/o'd him without knowing what f/o'ing was and then transitioned this to shipping VexDem like heck. On the hero side: MY GIRL KAIRI! But honorable mentions go to Sora, Riku, Aqua, Ven, Terra, Xion, Roxas, Lea, Ienzo, any Disney character I loved beforehand (this is way too fuckin many to list), Merlin (OKAY I WILL SINGLE HIM OUT), Yen Sid (I'LL SINGLE HIM OUT TOO), you know what let's also single out the Mickey+Donald+Goofy power trio...just...any KH hero who isn't part of the Yozora stuff or the KHUX stuff. ...Except I also LOVE Strelitzia, and she is the only KHUX-exclusive kiddo I care about but I care about her MANY. (Oh, and there's a least fave I have who's a "hero" but that's a debatable label). I would go on about why I love all of them but...that's too many characters to elaborate on

Least Favorite character: See, I think the real answer is Yozora, but the thing is I just tend to forget about him or not care (unless I'm doing a weird AU where he's Noctis' bratty Nobody, don't ask). He kinda represents the Shark Jump and I don't like watching that scene where he literally petrifies Sora for not being strong enough. But again, I can just kinda forget about him if he's not fed to me through a social-media unit. The one I LOVE TO HATE is Master Eraqus. The man actually triggered me back in the day. He is purity culture. He is the overbearing parent who will not accept you unless you are perfect. He is by and large the reason VAT didn't communicate with each other properly. He was the one who taught Aqua to think in absolutes. He lied to Ventus for years and then insisted to kill him was the only option, and then, when Terra tried to defend his brother figure/friend without knowing WHY Eraqus was doing such a thing, Eraqus didn't offer an explanation and instead switched targets to Terra citing that the problem was Terra's lack of OBEDIENCE. Eraqus is just very "my way or the highway" and uses his moral high horse to justify doing things that utterly lack compassion in any regard, which is something that GETS to me on a deep level, and let me tell you, I hated him for so long until I realized he was actually a super fuckin fun guy to imagine as a Bigger Bad in AUs that either have the KH protags teaming up or have villain protags needing a "greater good lawful evil" figure. And I just have found too many good memes about him cheating at chess and killing children. I have to laugh. Making fun of him is fun. He's a ridiculous character. That said, this recent trend of "erase everything bad he ever did and paint him as the ultimate hero of the saga" makes me raise eyebrows for SEVERAL reasons

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): VexDem, SoRiku, Kairi x Jaune Arc (RWBY), Aqua x Rosalina (Super Mario Galaxy) x Bayonetta, IsaLea, Ventus x Papyrus (Undertale), that was six but they all needed to be mentioned

Character I find most attractive: Ienzo. HOO BABY he is adorable. I saw someone make a Valentine's Day gifset of KH and FF characters shortly after III dropped and seeing his smiling face paired with a romance quote made my heart FLUTTER

Character I would marry: Probably Ienzo, see above. He's also a very kind guy. Favorite redemption in the modern era.

Character I would be best friends with: I hope the Destiny Trio would adopt me into their friend circle the way they've tended to do with every other inter-world denizen they've come across. I would love to have them as my positivity squad. Or, y'know, two positivities and one "it's okay to screw up" guy. Just. I would love to hang out with them. I often worry that I'm unlikable to my faves, but even though I would usually prefer to hang with the villains, I can pretty much guarantee these three would be open-minded about me. (Do I kiiiiinda wanna be friends with Vexen though? Of course I do. He'd hate me but maaaayyyyybe he would see me as one of his pet idiots who makes him look smarter, and we could bond over our fragile egos?)

a random thought: You ever think about that one NPC lady in Traverse Town who refused to tell you where she was from because it was none of her business? You ever wonder where she WAS from? What her world was like? How she ended up being the survivor of the Ansem Apocalypse when it hit her? All I know is that when I read her lines out loud (I used to read KH speech balloons out loud all the time), I gave her a Southern accent for no discernible reason and I stand by it. That woman has a twang.

An unpopular opinion: I don't want KHUX to be canon because I feel it's smaller-scale and takes a lot of mystery out of the worldbuilding. I always assume that the KHverse just includes ALL worlds in fiction, and that includes their thousand-year histories, meaning the Age of Fairy Tales should've happened long long long LONG LONG LONG ago and not five generations. And whatever screwed up the world should've been more than just five people having a fight, and whatever saved it should've been more than just five people getting along, and Daybreak Town really suffers from having to stick to mobile-friendly graphics and therefore is the least aesthetically attractive KH town ever, and I don't like that Lauriam and Elrena used to be such selfless people. I do still love Strelitzia because she's shy and relatable and quirky (sitting on the roof) and she questions authority and if you go with shipping subtext she's probably bi (or pan?), but I don't like the "Lauriam's dead sister for his arc's drama" bit. I liked when Marluxia was angry because he wanted to run Organization XIII but it was in the hands of an idiot who wasn't him. And more than anything I just like imagining that the Age of Fairy Tales was something bigger, further in the past, and more mysterious than something designed for a mobile game. Scala ad Caelum, however, I like a lot better because there IS a lot of mystery there and also it's a very pretty town with an amazing design.

my canon OTP: I really only count the Disney couples as the "canon" ones, so this is a question of picking my favorite Disney couple that shows up onscreen. I hope I'm not forgetting an important one, but I think the title has to go to Aladdin/Jasmine, which is always perfect in everything. (This would be an ENTIRELY DIFFERENT STORY if KH had ever adapted Treasure Planet, and if it ever gets the mind to adapt Treasure Planet then even if I don't care about that game I will immediately declare that Amelia/Doppler takes the KH canon OTP crown. *taps watch* Get on it Squenix)

Non-canon OTP: SoRiku, which I counted as "basically canon" after DDD until III decided it wasn't sure. But I'm just a sucker for how DDD is the two of them all "HE'S GOT MY BACK AND I'VE GOT HIS AND I'D DO ANYTHING FOR HIM SO LONG AS HE'S HAPPY." It's just the best kind of Friends-to-Lovers, except when you take all canon into account it's Friends-to-Rivals-to-Enemies-to-Friends-to-Lovers and that's a very juicy dynamic. BUT ALSO: VexDem, which is a nostalgia ship SO STRONG I had to accept that it eclipsed my former Vexen ships by a mile and I wanted to go back to my roots. That one, I have a much longer essay about that I'll just have you refer to so I don't repeat myself for pages. To make a long story short, their scene in III was JUST DELICIOUS.

most badass character: OOF THEY'RE ALL BADASS but in the end it's between Sora and Aqua, because Sora gets the widest RANGE of abilities across the series that he masters while Aqua gets the most POWERFUL abilities due to her Mastery (Command Styles seem like they'd be the most OP things ever in-universe and I'm here for it because flashy battle moves make brain go brr).

pairing I am not a fan of: SOKAI, Xehaqus, RikuNami, Vanitas/anyone not evil

character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): OH BOY. KAIRI THE MOST. YOU ALL KNOW WHY: lack of screen time, Fridging for drama, forced romance to invite death flags (they really wanted to milk that death to get people talking didn't they?), giving Alyson Stoner ZERO direction to actually follow up on Hayden Panettiere's performance. But then I remember that they made Vexen redeem and lose his entire personality and I just...uuugghhhh. I can't believe he died twice in this series. And then Demyx is FUN but also I know he's flipped sides as well, which means he won't be fun much longer! Xehanort seems to switch motivations to whatever makes him the biggest threat (and several of Eraqus' old flaws seem to be mysteriously glued onto him), Sora isn't a motormouth anymore, Riku just doesn't get anyone who cares about him anymore because everyone's distracted by Sora and Kairi, IS ANYBODY GOING TO ADDRESS THE ACTUAL ISSUES THAT DROVE THE WAYFINDER TRIO APART, oh God Marluxia and Larxene you're good guys now what have they done to you

favourite friendship: I really like each of the trios. But you know what's even BETTER than the trios? If you put...all of the trios together...meaning Sora, Riku, Kairi, Mickey, Donald, Goofy, Aqua, Terra, Ven, Roxas, Xion, Lea, Hayner, Pence, Olette...and then you added Isa back in there...and you gave them Ienzo...and you brought back Naminé...and you say that Subject X is Strelitzia and you have her turn back up so she can have justice done...AND YOU HAVE AN ULTRA KEYBLADE GROUP OF FRIENDS. As for Vexen, any purely platonic relationship I have for him is a crossover but trust me I have many crossover pals for he

character I want to adopt or be adopted by: See everyone I listed above in the friendship question. They can either mentor me or let me be their big sis/mom. But also, I will GLADLY be Merlin or Yen Sid's daughter. (But also would I kiiiiinda wanna be a VexDem daughter? This is the worst idea. Still wanna try)

[fairynavi]

stronger than you | strong! fem! reader hcs

you are a 2nd year manager of karasuno and here are hcs on how noya, tanaka, and ennoshita react to you being physically stronger than you seem

☆ nishinoya yuu

you, along with yachi, were introduced by kiyoko as new managers for the club. you've been in the club for quite some time now and you're well acquainted with everyone now

especiall noya since the both of you are in the same year (and he's very excited about how they have a manager who's in the same year as him)

noya is just an energetic and spontaneous ball

he'll go to your classroom and shout your name so you could go to the clubroom together

you would find it very endearing if it weren't for the knowing looks your friends would give you whenever noya came by

OKAY SO

you joined in your 2nd year after leaving the martial arts club

why'd you leave? you weren't too keen on the suffocating competitive atmosphere in the club

the club president wasn't very good in keeping everyone organised

the club was overall just a mess and you didn't want to get involved in any more problems

while everyone's cleaning up, hinata and kageyama snuck to the court a bit a do extra spiking drills

you heard them bickering but you didn't actually expect they'd do anymore drills

but at this point, you weren't surprised anymore

this time, hinata went a bit all out and the ball came flying towards an unsuspecting noya who was drinking what's left of his water bottle

fortunately, you were nearby

you immediately drop whatever you were holding (which were brooms) and immediately go in front of noya, fixing your stance (like how you would during a hand to hand spar)

you use your arm and hover it steadily in front of your face where the ball was going towards

you successfully stop the ball, which you grab from the floor

you're unaware of the stares from the other people in the gym

"hinata! kageyama! be careful! you could have hurt someone!" you lecture the first years, to which they immediately apologize for (after they've completely processed what you just did)

you turn around and look at noya, who's just looking at you in awe

"noya-san? you okay there?" you wave your hand in front of him, where he finally responds by blinking

he finally processes everything, he's confused, he's blushing, he's staring at you in awe because a girl saved him?? a v v pretty girl saved him from a ball that could've hit his head??

he's just shocked, my dood

for the first time, he's at a loss for words

"earth to noya-san?"

he finally speaks

"[y/n]-san... that... that was so aWESOME! you're... i guess you were stronger than i had initially thought, y'know? thanks for saving my head there! you're so cool, [y/n]-san!"

you're blushing now too

sure, you've been called cool by other people, but it seems that when noya says it, it just feels so different

"thank you, noya-san..."

the next few days, he'll just bother you about where you got so strong and when he learns that you know martial arts, he just WANTS you to teach him some self-defense

he was already attracted to you when you joined the club as a manager

now he learns that you're actually physically stronger than you seem??

bro, he's infatuated

wait no, scratch that

he's head over heels for you

expect a lot of compliments from him

also expect a lot of, "[y/n], do you think you can carry me?"

"for the last time, noya, i am NOT carrying you"

☆ tanaka ryuunosuke

you already knew tanaka, during your 1st year, even before joining the karasuno volleyball club because of ennoshita

but you've only met with him once or twice on the rare occasions where you'd do a group project with ennoshita

you joined the volleyball club in your 2nd year as a manager for the boy's team when the club that you were previously in had disbanded due to lack of members

to everyone's surprise, tanaka recognizes you the moment you enter the gym

you quickly become well acquainted with everyone

it's been like 3 months since you've joined the club and you're comfortable with walking home with everyone

especially with tanaka since coincidentally, you live in the same neighborhood as him

this one particular day, tanaka says he'd forgotten his textbook in coach ukai's shop while you were already walking home with him

you guys weren't that far from his shop but you were already tired enough to go back with him

you let him go and retrieve his textbook, assuring that you'll be fine on your own

he runs back to the shop and you lean onto a pole nearby, waiting patiently for him

that's when two creepy men approach you and begin small talk, getting into your personal space too many times

they crossed the line when one of them tried to lift up your skirt, the other one pinning you onto the wall

before they could do anything else, you immediately go under his arm and out while it was still a bit loose and you immediately strike your hand on his nape, earning a pained groan from the man

the other one hesitated to attack you but he did, trying to punch you, but you immediately dodge, making him stumble and fall

using whatever strength you had left, with your adrenaline helping, you lift the other and drop him onto his companion, earning groans from the two of them

the moment tanaka comes back, he's immediately in front of you, in a very defensive stance, barking at the strangers

he doesn't look at you as he grabs your arms, pulling you close to him as you continue walking home

finally, he looks at you and notices the state that you are in

your blazer's unbuttoned, the blouse underneath lost the top button, your clothes are creased and your hair is just everywhere

you're sweating, still not recovering from the adrenaline rush from earlier

lowkey you look attractive rn

"[y/n]! are you okay?! are you hurt?! the hell happened back there?! did those guys try to touch you?!"

"tanaka, chill, i'm fine. just some random dudes trying to get touchy with me. nothing i can't handle"

he's relieved that you're okay and he makes sure you get home safely (ohoho what a gentleman) and once he gets everything in his head, he's in love

i mean, who wouldn't be attracted to a girl who just DESTROYED two men trying to touch her

the next day when you greet him, he's all blushy and scared because you might beat his ass if you felt like it

he later learns that you were taught self-defense at an early age and continued training up until now

tanaka will stare at you whenever you're talking with someone, hoping you wouldn't notice, but boy's just too obvious about his infatuation

the whole team probably knows his crush on you without him confirming it

☆ ennoshita chikara

you joined the volleyball club shortly after transferring to karasuno in your 2nd year

you're classmates with ennoshita, so you were relieved that you knew someone in the team

you quickly became friends with everyone on the team a few days later due to them being very friendly and kiyoko never leaving you confused during practice

once you're comfortable enough with them, you've shown your very playful side

leading you, along with noya and tanaka, to get some lectures from ennoshita

you were never one to actually do dumb things, but you always encouraged them to do the dumb thing

"im not a bad influence i swear" turns into "lmao yea, you should totally give that snake a pat"

even though you seem playful, you're still very reliable when the situation calls for it

you stopped a good amount of class fights and bickering to avoid it elevating to a physical fight

you've also stopped hinata and kageyama's bickering a few times

of course, ennoshita's noticed this and has developed an admiration to you

he didn't notice the thin line between admiration and infatuation

he finds himself staring at you a lot during practice now, always denying that he had a crush on you and just convinced himself that "i just respect her a lot"

it's currently the last day of the tokyo summer training camp, and you're helping out unloading a few more stuff that they bought

you're carrying two fairly heavy coolers, both of which are filled with refreshments

ennoshita sees you and sprints up to you, offering to help

"oh, there's no need ennoshita-kun, go ahead and eat, you should enjoy yourself"

there it is, that very sweet consideration that sends ennoshita's heart flying

"don't worry [y/n], i want to help you"

you smile and take up his offer, giving him one of the coolers

he almost droos the cooler from how heavy it was

he initially thought it wasn't at all heavy since you didn't at all look like you were having a hard time, he underestimated the weight of the cooler

you look at him in worry but then you burst into a fit of laughter, earning some attention your way

ennoshita was embarrassed as he tried to tell you to stop laughing at him

"sorry ennoshita-kun, but that was the reason i didn't want you to carry it, come on, give that back to me"

he stares at you for a bit, still not over the shock of learning how strong you actually are

you wave your hand in front of his face and he comes back to reality

"no, no, i can carry this, your shoulders might get sore, [y/n]"

AWWWW HE'S CONCERNEDD

while the both of you walk, you tell him about how you underwent some intense (somewhat unnecessary) training during middle school as you were part of the track & field club

once you deemed that the training was far too much and your body couldn't take it anymore so you quit when you went into high school

the reason you transferred was because your mom landed a job as a teacher for karasuno high

he's in awe about... just about everything about you

it's honestly not hard for him to fall for you at this point

he'll listen to you the rest of the day, wanting to get to know you more and more

when someone goes to help you carry something particularly heavy, he anticipates for their reaction over you being stronger than they are

he just loves you at this point, really

i hope i depicted them properly TwT

[gophergal]

Genderbent Slasher Headcanons

So yeah, this is based on the kotobukiya horror bishoujo figures cause I'm a weeb and a perv, but I do add the scars, deformities, and blemishes present on the guys to some extent. Cute girls make me weak and so do murder men, so putting them together has stolen my soul.

Jay Voorhees

She's very shy, like, unbelievably shy. The first thought that crosses her mind when someone intruders on the camp is to hide. She's actually scared of people, the poor dear! That's not to say that she won't kill you; she has a machete for a reason, you know. However, she does prefer trying to scare people away if she can.

She's not as tall or built as her male counterpart, but she has a body to put most average guys to shame. She's strong as hell, and tall to boot. 6'4" and she can easily lift a guy with one hand. Frankly I want her to do that to me but y'know-

Now let's say she found herself an S/O, someone kind who can look past her asymmetrical face and intimidating presence and can see her for the sweet, cute woman she is. She is SO affectionate. compared to Jason, she's actually very likely to initiate touch with her S/O. Would cuddle you all day if she could, but she doesn't know her own strength either. She needs reminded that you have ribs and that they'll break if she's too rough on you.

Better yet, she craves positive attention and you should give it to her. Pet her hair, kiss her face, and can she please be the little spoon? She thinks herself too man-ish sometimes and isn't comfortable in her own brand of feminity, so treat her like a princess. Bring her wild flowers and tell her that her eyes remind you of the lake itself, but also remind her that you love a strong woman and she is no less a woman for her body and interests.

Marybelle "Sissy" Sawyer

Thicc Texan girl, need I say more? She's all plush curves and has a total mom bod despite not actually being a mom. She has the personality to match too! Taking care of your older brothers will do that to a lady. Don't get me wrong, under those plush curves is ton of muscle! She's 5'7" without her boots on, but don't let that fool you, she will knock your ass to the ground.

Slightly more assertive than Bubba. Now it's not by much, but Drayton isn't nearly as hard on her. He's still mean, but he recognizes how sensitive his baby sister is and hates to make her cry. In fact, all three of her brothers are very protective of her. She's still in charge of the meat though, so she's still no pampered princess.

Now, prospective S/O, you will get the shovel talk of a lifetime. "You hurt our Sissy and you won't even make a good stew meat when we're done with you," that's what the Sawyer men'll tell you. No worries, Sissy loves you too much to let them hurt you.

Speaking of loving you, she's another big cuddle bug. She's very gentle though, and likes when you rest your head on her chest and thighs so she can play with your hair and be close to you. Would love to do fun things with you, like doing your makeup together! She's got an eye for color, even if she is heavy handed. Don't wear makeup? She likes to make crafts too, or just relax with you when you have the chance.

Freddie Krueger

(no I'm not going to change her name, nothing works quite like Freddy does so I'm just going with the feminine form of it.)

A party girl. That's it. She'll drink every last drop of booze you have and pull some wild shit. She's also really bitchy. She's a ton of attitude in a really small package. How small? 5'2" and if you mention it, you might just end up on the business end of her glove.

Would never admit it, but she's genuinely a little insecure about her burns. She's nowhere near being a burnt chicken nugget, like another dream killer we know, but she has a good number of marks on her body. She enjoys how scary they make her though and, like nugget man, will use this to her advantage.

Oh, S/O, you poor soul, you've chosen a high maintenance woman, that or she chose you. Either way, she wants your attention. She's all for PDA and will push your boundaries as she sees fit. Likes to mark you up in hard to cover areas. Also, somehow, still refuses to admit that she just wants love. She'll swear up and down that she's not a cuddler, but will always end up in your arms at the end of the night.

Michelle Myers

Shes far more outright hot headed than her male counterpart. Where he will watch a victim with a simple curiosity, she will twist the knife, fire in her good eye as she drinks in their pain. She looks like a model in many ways. She's the type of woman everyone wants or envies, until they end up her victim, that is. She's 5'11" and has an average build. Not skinny, curvy, or muscular to any extreme.

She seems cold, and she is, but it's because doesn't know how to deal with her emotions. Small things set her off and it's not pretty. She likes calm places and calm people. You have to stay calm and alert if you want her to be interested enough in you not to kill you.

So she's chosen you to be her S/O, how exciting! Don't expect her to court you for long, she isn't a patient woman. You'll know she's interested when you find her in your bed at 2am. She's possessive too. Any kisses she gives are ravenous and leave you with bruised and bitten lips. She marks you as hers, carefully carving her initials onto you. And she is always big spoon every time you cuddle. If you try to hold her she'll kick you off the bed or into a wall.

But if you are calm and patient where she is wrathful and impulsive, Michelle will show you another side to her. Her kisses will lose their hunger and will gain a gentleness to them. She still marks you, but with her mouth and teeth rather than her blade. And finally, she'll sit in your lap and let you hold her. To have her feel so safe with you is an honor and an achievement.

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #420

lol blaze it (i’m funny i swear)

In your opinion, which fast food place has the best fries? Without a doubt, Bojangle's. Good. Shit. Are there hurricanes where you live? Yeah, they're common here. What do you hate the most about yourself? I'd really rather not get into this right about now. What song are you listening to right now? "Beast of Gévaudan" by Powerwolf. What was your first concert? Alice Cooper. Also my only concert. What’s your favorite Johnny Depp movie? Alice In Wonderland. Who did you last say “I love you” to? My sister. Do you like pumpkin pie? Anything pumpkin-flavored is a hell no from me. Do you know anyone named Austin? Knew, rather. Do you know anyone who is having a baby? My friend recently announced she and her husband are having their second child in December. What was the last thing you cried about? Just PTSD. Do you prefer regular or chocolate milk? I like both, but I prefer chocolate. Do you think you are an argumentative person? Definitely not. How many deep dark secrets do you have? Two or so, idk. What was the spiciest thing you’ve ever eaten? Some wings at Buffalo Wild Wings with one of the hottest sauces. Wanted to die. ... Yet I continued to get that one whenever I went for years lmao. Who last called you sexy? I don't know. Would you class yourself as a good role model? In some ways, but in a lot of other ways, no. Are you scared of the dark? No. Do you have a motto? No. Who did you last see on webcam? The doctor that overlooks my TMS progress. Do you need a haircut? I need a trim for sure. How would you react if your mother told you that she was pregnant again? Well, considering 1.) she's way past menopause and especially 2.) she's had a complete hysterectomy, y'know... that's kind of impossible. She also hasn't been with a guy in many years, so she would have to be joking. You log into Facebook and see the red ‘1’ notification next to the message icon. Who do you want it to be? -___- Would you rather exercise alone or with other people? ALONE. You will NOT see me exercise in front of other people. What is the most difficult or involved video game you’ve ever played? The most involved is DEFINITELY World of Warcraft, and I guess you could consider it the hardest too, given some of the much more difficult things I've done in it. It itself isn't a hard game whatsoever, but you can pursue some really hard achievements. Ever watch the show Supernatural? If you have, then what’s your favorite episode? I used to love it, but just stopped watching eventually. My fave episode... Man, it's been too long to remember many. Probably one of the funnier ones. I remember I specifically liked the bit where they were in your everyday comedy show, as well as the one where I THINK Dean kept trying to prevent Sam from dying. I just remember the "Eye of the Tiger" bit that is pure gold. Ever heard of flavored honey? If so, what’s you’re favorite flavor? Oh, no, but that sounds good. Do you remember what your favorite show was when you were little? Yeah, Pokemon. Do you put anything besides cheese on grilled cheese sandwiches? Besides butter, which I think is pretty standard, no. When it comes to books, what do you think is the “perfect” amount of pages? Uh, I dunno. It depends on the book. I don't really care about page numbers. Would you ever be interested in going scuba diving? Yeah. Out of all of your friends/relatives, who would you say has the best vocabulary? Girt, probably. Are any of your fingers or toes deformed? What about the nails? I don't think so? When is the last time you cried? I was sobbing earlier today, fun stuff. Would you ever date somebody that has been divorced more than once? Most likely not. ESPECIALLY at my age. What are some stereotypically nerdy things that you like? Oh god. WoW, M:tG, big glasses, anime (does that count? idk really), video games... a lot of stuff, really. Have you ever attended a wedding that ended where the bride and groom didn’t actually get married? What happened? Y I K E S, no. That would be SO uncomf. What scares you the most about becoming a mother (hypothetically, if you don’t want to have children)? Actually raising it properly, physically and emotionally. Would you ever want a job in fashion? What would you enjoy about that type of job? No. Would you ever be a surrogate mother? No. What do you think would be the best and worst parts about being a twin? It'd be cool to have someone you feel an almost supernatural connection towards, but I'd also feel like I wasn't as "original" as I would be if I was born alone. Do you feel that your childhood was more rough compared to others around you? I mean it wasn't awful at all, but sure, in some ways compared to at least someone. How would you react if you found out today that you were actually adopted? Well today I'm a wreck, so don't tell me. I want to know that I wasn't lied to for 25 years. Have either of your parents ever cheated on one another before, that you know of? How would you react if you found out today that one of them cheated? I'm not entirely clear on this, but I'm 90% sure Dad cheated on Mom with his now-wife. Dad also accused Mom of cheating, but I HIGHLY doubt that's true. Do you like cleaning and organizing? Not really. How would you react if you found out you were infertile? If you don’t plan on having kids to begin with, what is a long-term goal you’d be crushed to find out was impossible to achieve? Fuck having kids. I'd be a terrible mother. So to answer the other question, I'll be pretty, pretty sad if I can't get permission to spread Teddy's ashes at Yellowstone. Would you take your dream job if it were out of the country? Well, obviously not considering my dream job is a meerkat biologist, and I'm not moving to Africa. Have you ever been robbed? No. Is anyone close to you an alcoholic? Not anymore. Dad was, but he's recovered. Have you ever dumped anyone? Yes. What kind of tea do you drink? I hate tea. Do you know anyone in a gang? No, and I hope I never do. What’s the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for you? Risk his fucking sanity and health to try to hold my fucked up self up. What is your orientation? Gay? Straight? Metrosexual? Anything other? Bisexual. I've kinda been questioning pansexual of the late, though. I don't know. Have you ever done anything really dangerous or illegal with friends? Not to my memory. Name three feelings you’re feeling right now: Regret. Hopelessness. Loneliness. And the reasons for these feelings? Take a wild fuckin' guess. How do you feel about your life right now? It's an actual dumpster fire. Is it easy for you to like yourself? Why or why not? Fuck no. Because there's just not very much TO like about me. Even on my good days, I see flaw after flaw in myself. What subjects come naturally to you? English, some aspects of science. What subjects do not? Math, economics, politics, history... Do you read more fiction or more non-fiction books? Definitely fiction. When I read a book, I want an escape from the real world. How has today been for you? BOY HOWDY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! What did you do? Went to TMS therapy. Sat on the Internet. Cried. :^) Are there any candles lit in the room you’re in? No. Are there any lava lamps near you? No. I want one, though. Do you like cats or dogs better? Cats. Are any of your friends a pothead? Yes. What’s a goal you’re trying to accomplish soon? Start losing weight again. That'd be pretty goddamn grand. Are you a high maintenance person? Definitely not. The last time you yelled as loud as you could, what was the reason? I was having a nightmare. Have you ever been heartbroken? For sure. Who did that to you? First Dad, then Jason. Did you go through an ugly stage as a kid? Boy, did I. The last type of sandwich you made or ate: A pb&j. The last time you spent most of the day in bed: Literally every day. I do just about everything in bed. Pathetic, I know. The last friend or acquaintance you made: Ummmm idk. The last thing you took pictures of: A hydrangea bush. The last time you were scared: Now. The future is terrifying, my friend. The last thing you looked up online: The definition of a word to ensure I was using it correctly. The last thing you disagreed with: So I've been watching John Wolfe's old stream of him playing Alice: Madness Returns, and he went on a total soapbox about smoking being okay essentially because we're all gonna die eventually from something, and I really disagreed with it. Does your house have a separate laundry room? No, just like a closet. Do your parents still help you financially? I'm still entirely dependent on them. Does your car have a backup camera? No. Have either of your parents ever been in trouble with the law? Not to my knowledge. Have you ever had a pet that lived to be really old for its breed/species? REALLY old, no. Teddy was definitely up there, but beagles have lived longer. What was the last strong scent you smelled? Lysol. Have you ever told someone to their face that they were ugly? Christ, no. Is your bed against more than one of your walls? No. Have you ever been attracted to someone’s parent? Don't think so? Have you ever pole danced before? No. Have you ever broken into someone’s house? No. Have you ever seen a live bat? Yes. What is the most amount of money you’ve spent on a meal before? I dunno. Have you ever taken a woodshop class? No. How much time do you spend on Facebook, if you have one? Funny you ask, because as of today I decided to take a break from it for awhile. I've found it's nothing more than a breeding ground for envy and making me feel like a horribly incompetent adult. Has a teacher ever made you hate yourself/your work? I had one photography teacher in college that I was NOT a fan of. He was super, super hard on everyone, like to an unnecessary degree. We were students, not pros. Have you ever been on the barrier or front row at a concert? No. Are your parents supportive of you? Somehow.

[wooyoungleeeeeex]

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Welcome! Welcome, all!

today, you're gonna be learning,

my nicknames for allll of the other members!

strap yourself in! This'll be an interesting ride!

»»————-　➴　————-««

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First, Hongjoong hyung!

--- > @joongielee

I like to call hyung names that'll annoy him, not because I hate him or anything. I just find him getting mad funny. ☺️ some names I call him are endearing, but most of 'em aren't. If he can be mean to me then I can be mean to him! >:D

--❝Tiny❞ -> I'm not creative, okay? He's small.

--❝dad/appa❞ -> because he's like a father to me 🥺 and I'm the bratty son!

--❝Mean lil bitchy gremlin❞ -> this one isn't one I call him directly, I call him it in passing. If I'm talking about him to one of the other members I'll probably call him this.

--❝Annoying hyung❞ -> everyone can be annoying, but especially Hong-Hyung. Like, just because I didn't do my chores doesn't mean you have to complain at me??

--❝Pretty Leader Hyung❞ -> y'know, surprisingly enough there are times where I'm not the problem. I look up to my amazing hyung a lot. 🥺 or... Y'know.. Sometimes I'll use this so he gets me what I want..

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Next up: Seonghwa Hyung!

--- > @hwaseongler

I'm a little bit nicer to Seonghwa hyung because he scares me... (but trust me when the two hyungs are together; that's the scariest >^<) but I still like to be a bit of a brat >:D nobody can stop me!!

--❝Mom/Eomma❞ -> this one's pretty simple, him and Hongjoong hyung are basically married (right? I just wasn't invited to the wedding..) Joongie's the dad and Hwa is the momma 😌

--❝Satan??/devil❞ -> you people don't know this but - ahem.. SEONGHWA HYUNG IS EVIL!

--❝Best Hyung™️❞ -> I know what I said, but Seonghwa hyung is just as amazing as he is evil. It's not a contradiction, it's just the truth.

--❝Scary part 1.❞ -> being in his presence is intimidating.

--❝Evil Biatch.❞ -> once again, I would never call him this directly because I'm too scared to because that's too mean, but I think it. I think it a lot.

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Next! Yunho Hyung :D

--- > @yungiggle

I have my good nicknames and my bad nicknames for each member. There's a lot less for Yunho because he hasn't wronged me very much...

--❝Puppy Prince❞ -> you've seen him right? He's just a happy puppy! 🥺

--❝Giant Scary❞ -> as cute as he is... When he wiggles his fingers at me I get afraid.

--❝Professional Traitor❞ -> if you ever need someone to be a traitor for you, Yunho's your guy. I can't tell you the amount of times I have asked for help and he's ended up joining my enemies instead. 😤

--❝The BCG❞ -> the big cuddly giant. His hugs are amazing. ☺️

--❝Big Sweetheart❞ -> look, Yunnie's really nice 🥺 well, most of the time.. And I respect him for that! Being nice to Wooyoung gets you my respect! >:3

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Let's keep this train rolling~

--- > @yeoswitch

Yeo hasn't caused me many problems, so I'm happy to say that I have mostly good names for him. ☺️

--❝Shy n' Cute❞ -> he's adorable 🤩 and super shy! When I get my ler hands on him imma wreck him >:D

--❝Mister Silence❞ -> sometimes he just ignores me- like c'mon Yeo, I know you don't find me that annoying.

--❝Bestieeee❞ -> my bestest friend of all!! 🤩🤩 I love you Yeosangie!

--❝Tiny: the sequal❞ -> he's not as small as Hong-Hyung is, but he's still small. 😎

--❝Disney Prince❞ -> he does look like a Prince tho- like c'mon ya'll. He's suuuuper pretty!

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Neeeeext, the wonderful... The adorable!

--- > @squeakysannie !!

Sannie's too adorable to me mean too.. But like I said, nobody escapes my bratty wrath. But I'll be kinder so that I don't get beheaded. 🥰

--❝Dimples❞ ->

Do I need to say anything else?

--❝Sir-Squeaks-Alot❞ -> if you couldn't tell already, Sannie is a squeaker. Give him a good ol' poke and you'll get a cute squeak. 🥰

--❝Cuddles❞ -> he's so cute and cuddly, please 🥺

--❝Weaklee❞ -> he gives off big lee energy! Not that surprising since y'know... He is a lee but still, it's adorable how weak he is to tickles 🥺

--❝The Favorite Child❞ -> nobody will deny that San is always the favorite no matter what. It doesn't matter if he misbehaves, he's still the favorite.

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Neeeeext up! We're almost done!

--- > @cockyswitchsong

Mingi is... Complicated.. I'm afraid of him but I also like messing with him. So I'll be nice... Ish.. We'll see how it goes, y'know?

--❝Scary part 2: the scarening❞ -> like I said, I'm afraid of him. He's not as scary as Seonghwa hyung, but there is still fear 😰

--❝lil' bitch boy.❞ -> I have no words for this one... It's just- something that I call him..? When I'm feeling particularly annoying?

--❝Deep Voiced demon.❞ -> like, holy shit that's scary. Especially when he teases, good God.

--❝The BCG, just smaller and meaner❞ -> Mingi can be cuddly too, like Yunho he's tall and perfect for cuddling! But like... He's a lot meaner and sneakier then Yunho.. 🥺

--❝Sneaky Snek.❞ -> You can't tell Mingi any of your secrets.. He won't keep them.. I know from experience since everyone knows my most ticklish spot now..

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And finally! Last but not least!

--- > @jonghosofthours !!!!

Look, Jongho and I.. We don't get along well in this world. He is the reason I can barely get away with anything! I mean, I love him! He's a good cuddler but jeez..

--❝H E N C H❞ -> You can't run from him, he'll pick you up with ease.

--❝Scary part 3: the strong boy scare.❞ -> when he holds you down and looks at you - eugh- it sends shivers down my spine just thinking about it.

--❝Obeidient little cock-a-doodle-doo.❞ -> he always listens to hyungs, it's annoying. I can't get a suitable partner in crime here >:( well, I guess it's just every man for himself 🤷‍♂️

--❝holy shriek❞ -> and I thought I was loud.

--❝competetive little bish.❞ -> everything. is. a. competition. And it's even more annoying because I always end up losing!

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Then... There are nicknames I give all of them at times too...

--❝B-Boy❞ -> basically stands for bitch boy but nobody has figured it out yet >:)

--❝cock-a-doodle-doos❞ -> the politer way of saying "cocks" or "dickheads" ☺️

--❝Annoying twerpy hyungs❞ -> I can take any new negative adjective and turn it into a great insult! The others have heard much worse then this one.. What can I say? Even though I always get the "LaNgUage!" complaint, I'll never stop cussing! >:D

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༻✦༺ 　༻✧༺　༻✦༺

Now I'm just gonna end this by saying... Guys, I love you. And I'll be locked in my room if you need me. :)

Thanks for reading ya'll! Cya later! Or not- because I might die! But I'll try not to!