#he'd hate me so much cause I'm constantly broke

[pineapplesneedrights]

..... so I decided to change my phone theme

It's a work in progress so nothing is final but I am loving where my dumb dumb little brain is taking meeeee

I don't wanna talk about how long it took me to make JUST this one part of my homescreen-

I'm so proud that I came up with the idea of the sigils being my app icons- not to brag but it felt very big brained of me

... what doesn't feel big brained is me deciding not to give them names so I have to sit there like a dumbass and try to remember which sigil is what app-

The things I do for aesthetics 🥲

[captain-mj]

PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD!! Write the mafia au. If you want to do just a little bit of exposition before the smut instead of fleshing it all out, I would still be thrilled!!! I'm so excited.

Okay! You've convinced me I'll make it! (Did not have to convince me at all I was already writing it)

Ghost liked his flat. It was more spacious and well taken care of than any shack he had been in as a child. As much as he liked it though, he never stayed in it long lately. He'd wake up, go to the gym, take a shower there and then go to his favorite place recently.

Soap was a nice person. He looked a little soft. Ghost knew he was 19, 20 in two months, and that he wanted to be in the military but had a shoulder injury in high school that kept him from doing so. Soap explained that if he could prove he healed enough, he could join but the damn bastards wouldn't listen.

Personally, Ghost saw the way Soap winced when his shoulder twisted too far and that he clearly didn't have full range of motion in it. He hoped the military would never take him. People like Soap shouldn't be around bad things like that.

"Simon! My favorite customer." He said it like the man didn't tower over him and had a fucking mask on. He was scary.

"Sometimes it feels like I'm your only customer."

"Not many people come in at 7:30 in the damn morning for a drink." Soap grinned at him and started fixing him his tea. Same thing every time. Ghost could probably make it better at home, but who wanted to when he could have Soap make it for him.

Ghost grunted in response and, while he waiting, got his money ready. He almost wished tipping was more common, just so he'd have an excuse to throw money at him. Maybe he could slide the bills into his pocket. For stealth, it would have to be his jacket pocket, but in his little fantasy, he slide it in to the pocket on the back of his pants and give his ass a little squeeze.

"Simon?" Soap broke him from his thoughts. "Someone turned off the machine for the water, it's going to be a minute." He didn't seem very apologetic.

"That's fine. How have you been lately, Johnny?"

"I've been good. Got any plans for the day?"

"Nothing."

Soap smiled at him. "One day, will you tell me about yourself, Simon."

Ghost shook his head. "Never gonna happen."

"Come on. Live a little. Let me know something."

"This is my favorite part of my day." Ghost gave him that, watching how Soap blushed and smiled.

"Thank you, Simon." The tea finished and handed it over to Ghost. "I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Always." He smiled at him.

Ghost left quietly. He hated this part of the day. He liked pretending to be normal.

So he went to work. The boss waved at him and smiled. "There ya are." He was a strangely jovial man considering their line of work. "Need you to deal with a guy that's been causing problems tonight."

"I see. What's his deal?"

"Same thing it always is. A junkie not wanting to pay his dues." He sighs.

Same old, same old.

He sticks around. Great thing about the mob is how neat they keep things. Maybe that's just Price. But there are records for everything. Nothing happens in Manchester that doesn't get a little page about it.

Ghost doesn't deal with it much. He's a glorified hit man. No need to clean his hands and work on something as tedious as making a note of every ounce of coke currently sold versus coke in a warehouse.

So he stood next to his boss and acted as an intimidating guard dog.

Once it got dark, he got the address of the junkie from one of his... coworkers and he did what he always did. He went there with a knife and made his way down the halls of the flat.

What a shithole.

It was... vaguely grimy in the way all cheap places feel. His mother cleaned constantly but it never felt quite clean enough. He wandered right to his door and raised his hand to knock.

The junkie opened the door and Ghost decked him. His target hit the ground, barking something out about if Ghost "knew who he was" and "how he was a powerful man".

Ghost put his foot on the man's chest. "John Price sends his regards." He put more weight on him, crushing his ribs under his foot like dry grass. A creaking sound came from the bone doing its best not to fumble and break underneath him.

"Wait. No. I said I'll get him his money. No need to do anything hasty."

"...What a fucking waste."

Ghost lost track of how long he hit the other man. Just that he knew it hurt. He beat him until his hands hurt. He ran his fingers through the blood on the floor, finding two teeth. After he was done, he double checked to see if he was breathing, he needed him alive to pay his debts, and he left the apartment.

Down the hall, holding groceries, was none other than Johnny. The gorgeous man. He saw the blood on his hands and paled.

"Simon?" He seemed unsure, like he might have the wrong guy.

Ghost lifted his finger and put it to his lips.

Soap swallowed and stared at him as Ghost left.

Simon thought that was the end of it. A disappointing end to an innocent thing he had with him. While he had hoped to at least get his dick wet for the first time in ages, he could admit defeat.

Ghost went back and gave Price the teeth. Blood got his desk but he just grinned. "You did great. Thank you." He smiled at him. "Sit down with me."

Ghost sat in the chair across from him and took the drink. He lifted his mask up for just a moment before drinking it.

They discussed some local happenings for a few minutes before someone knocked on his boss's office. "What is it?" Price called out, leaning back in his chair.

"Caught someone sniffing around."

"Well, bring him in then."

Ghost sighed. "Fucking hell."

Soap was flustered and he had clearly been slapped around. Nothing too bad though. Ghost was going to kill him. He didn't want to, but Price could be unpredictable and it was better for everyone if Ghost did it. He'd do it nice and fast. Easy peasy.

"Simon."

Oh my god. This dude is fucking dumb.

Price raised an eyebrow immediately. "Simon, you know this guy?"

"Know is a strong word."

"Is it money?" Soap interrupted, which luckily seemed to be more amusing to Price than infuriating. "Look, if Simon owes something, I'll pay it okay?"

Price made a face and Ghost rubbed his temples. "Johnny..."

"Look, I understand okay? You didn't have a choice in doing this an-" Ghost grabbed Soap's face and yanked him down so he'd half fall into him.

"Johnny. Keep quiet, yeah?"

Soap paused, face slowly turning more red.

"That's cute." Price laughed. "How old are you kid?"

"I'll be 20 next month."

"Cute. I guess he is in your age range, Simon."

"Sir it's not like that. At all." Ghost tried to explain, finding this more than a little embarrassing.

Price grinned. "Simon. Here's what you're going to do. You're going to make sure... Johnny here never, ever comes back. I'll leave it up to you. Want to put a bullet in his head? Go for it. But if you want to just break his legs... you can do that too."

Soap started to struggle. "Simon, you won't hurt me, will you?" He looked so distressed.

Ghost sighed. Fucking hell. He grabbed him by his coat and dragged him away. "I'll deal with it, Price."

Soap tried to get his bearings but just couldn't, feet unable to get on the ground properly. "Simon, wait, please."

Ghost pushed him up against the wall in a spare room and fit his hands around his throat. "You're an idiot. You get that right? Following me like that."

Soap had to stand on his tip toes, hands around Ghost's wrist. "I'm sorry."

Ghost growled at him. "Listen up. You're going to go home. You're going to go back to work tomorrow. And you're never, ever going to come back here. You understand me?"

"Yes, sir." He swallowed against the hand holding him.

"Good. You're not going to breath a word of this to anyone. Ever. And if you do, I'll make sure you never breath again." He pressed against Soap, crowding him.

And crowding the hard on he was wearing. He glanced down at how Soap was trying so hard not to grind against him.

"Oh.

Oh."

Soap flushed and whined. "I'm sorry. I..."

Ghost rubbed his thigh gently against him and watched him moan. "Fucking hell."

He picked Soap up by his hips and placed him down on a table, pushing him back so he'd lay down. Soap pulled his shirt up and off while Ghost unbuckled his pants and shoved them down. He grabbed Soap's jeans and yanked them down. "Your little white knight act was cute. Coming in here to save me. What were you going to do? Pay off my debts? Fight your way through them?"

Soap went to snap back at him but Ghost trailed his fingers along his cock and he quickly shut up.

"You're brave. I'll give you that. And god I want to fuck you." He spit on to his fingers and grabbed him, teasing his hole with the pad of his finger. "You going to let me?"

Soap tried to push against him. "I'll beg you for it. Got all undressed for ya."

Ghost slapped his thigh hard, watching him jump. "You're a fucking slag." He pushed his finger in gently and growled at the way the flesh gave.

Soap groaned in a mix of pain and pleasure. "No, it's not like that..." For a moment, Ghost worried he'd struck a nerve but Soap was rocking against his finger with vigor, trying to get it in deeper.

"Then what's its like? You just like this for me?"

"Yes. Just you." Soap promised, looking up at him. "I've wanted you for so long... I was just so nervo-" Ghost sank his finger the rest of the way in to make him shut up. He used some of the oil they had around to make it a bit easier and started to work him open.

"You're going to be good and tell me if it hurts too much, won't you?"

Soap nodded and braced himself against the table. Ghost used some of the... precum dripping from Soap's cock to stroke his own, getting himself nice and wet. He grabbed him by his hips and pushed in nice and slow. Soap's mouth fell open right before he screamed.

"Fuck you're so big I don't know if i can... So big..." His legs locked around his hips as he whined. He kept whimpering and crying out as Ghost just pounded into him. Those nice legs of his were up in the air and trembling as he took it.

Ghost kissed him hard and then pulled away to let him keep yelling. He should've been more careful with him. Distantly, he knew that. But Soap was gagging for it, begging him in between cries. He grabbed him tight and pulled Ghost to his throat which he peppered with kisses.

"Please don't stop! Please! Don't! Stop!" Soap choked when he came, cum spilling over his chest.

Ghost finished inside him, feeling how tight he clenched around his cock. He thrust in a few more times before sliding out. Silently, he dressed Soap and fixed his belt.

Soap rubbed his face to get rid of the tears. His legs were shaky.

Ghost looked at him for a moment. No outward marks. He didn't bite at his throat like he wanted to. But the limp he had was obvious.

"Johnny..."

"Simon..."

"Sorry. Was I too rough with ya?"

"No! No. i enjoyed it. A lot."

Ghost grinned under his mask and grabbed a pen. On Soap's wrist, he wrote his number. "I know where you live. You feeling lonely, send me a text." He squeezed Soap's ass and sent him on his way.

The horrified looks everyone else gave him clued him in to what they thought happened. It was for the best. If they thought he tortured Soap, they'd at least let it go.

Price stared at him, looking just a little confused.

"Let him off with a warning."

"I see..."

[goosemagician]

so I was in a silly goofy mood and got the spontaneous inspiration to make yet another anti-hero playlist

I'm kinda hyperfixated on this au and idk why lmao

it might just be the fact that it takes all the sad about tpoh and wraps it up in a nice little ball

and then proceeds to punt it at your face and break your nose

I love emotional agony

anyway this one's sad now and sadly not as tailored to the content it's meant for 'cause all the depressing songs are either about heartbreak or self-hatred but at least self-hatred fits

anyway https://open.spotify.com/playlist/2ytFKB5AUv4C53amQ7LOgZ

pls mention if I actually hit the nail on its head with any of these songs I would love to know

oh my GOODNESS AAAAALSDKFJLKSDJF

YES YES A MILLION TIMES YES

okay spewing thoughts below the cut here we go buckle in

"Marceline, is it just you and me in the wreckage of the world? That must me so confusing for a little girl," LITERALLY ONE OF THE FIRST SONGS I LISTENED TO WHEN THINKING OF THIS AU YOU KEEP READING MY MIND AAAAAAAA

"I need to save you, but who's going to save me?" RGB raised this child at the END OF A WORLD that he LOVED and now it's GONE AND DEAD and it MIGHT BE ALL HIS FAULT (at least he's convinced that's true) and he doesn't feel like he deserves Hero at ALL and he wants so badly to be there for her but this man NEEDS A SUPPORT SYSTEM SO BAD AAAA

"A sadness runs through him" is also a SUPERB sad RGB song. It's beautiful and elegant just like him but also so deeply heart-wrenchingly aching AAUUUGH

"Bird Song" SUCH a good Hero song. "Well I didn't tell anyone, but a bird flew by. Saw what I'd done he set up a nest outside." She holds so much guilt for the end of the world. She's constantly trying to stomp down all of her feelings because she believes, at least subconsciously, that having feelings that are anything but "good" and "pleasant" automatically make her a bad person, which she tries so hard not to be but, at the same time, tells herself that she is BECAUSE of this. She's ANGRY and SAD and DESPERATE but if she ignores it long enough, then maybe it'll go away--maybe she can learn to live with it and the way it drags her stomach to her toes or eats away at the light that once resided inside her.

We all know how that turns out ;)

"The Dark" by Ethan Jewell. oh BOY.

"She whispers in my ear why have you done this, and what have you done? Why couldn't you have made the right choice for once?" RGB and Hero are SUCH guilt ridden characters its INSANE. There's a particular argument in this story that's pretty much this line verbatim. RGB knows Hero isn't wrong for being upset that she was the one chosen to be "The Hero," and that's what hurts. He shouldn't have chosen her, but if he hadn't it would have just been someone else. He didn't know her when he chose her, but now he does, and he'll regret that decision the rest of his life, even if it allowed him the happiness of raising her and taking care of her and being by her side. She's been through so much because of that one choice he made, and RGB will have one hell of a time forgiving himself for that.

"It's hard to get out of a hole when they take away your rope." Hero WAS his rope, until she sacrificed her heart for him and was consumed by, well, Hate. "This can't be happening. No, this can't be real." The very person he's sworn to protect, the person who broke down his walls and taught him what it means to push forward when everything pulls you back, the person who made him take back every rule he'd ever made for himself, like "not getting attached," has been ripped from him and turned on him, spewing his own self-hatred right back at him from the mouth of his DAUGHTER. The daughter he doesn't deserve to have or to love as much as he does and yet. She has been his PURPOSE these past twelve years. The world he dedicated his life to at least try to save has ended. So now he dedicates his life to this little girl who shouldn't be here, yet is anyway. He lives his life in apologies, trying to make up for the fact that she's still in this broken world with such a broken man for a father figure. Owie wowie.

"Monster" by Dodie. Hero has deliberately done a moral u-turn. If she can't be a Hero, she'll be a Monster. THAT'S KNIGHT HERO THAT'S WHY SHE EXISTS AAAAAAAAA

I have a PLAN for the song "Trust Me Not." It's LITERALLY a conversation between Knight Hero and RGB it's PERFECT

"Heart for Brains" by Roar. "Life's hard when you're soft." Even though Hero wears a VERY similar mask to RGB, thinking she's a monster and trying so hard to act tough and hard and be everything this new dead world demands her to be, underneath it all, she's still just Hero. She's that kind, caring, empathetic girl we all saw and loved. Tweens in general are incredibly angsty but Tween Hero gets it BAD because of this exact reason. She cares, and she doesn't want to because it hurts. The end of the world hurt so many people and took so many lives and she blames herself for that every single day. The SAME EXACT PROBLEM RGB HAD UNTIL THIS POINT. he cared. He didn't want to. So he WOULDN'T. (But he did. Or else he wouldn't have raised an entire child). Hero and RGB are little microcosms of each other and I find it so DELICIOUS story wise.

"A Soreness so Familiar it Soon Becomes Unquestionable" by Crywank. THE WAY THESE SONGS HIT THE NAIL ON THE HEAD IS REMARKABLE??!! "The choice between attack or to apologize. I find contrived white lies so no more anger will arise. The harmony isn't mutual but maybe I am condescending," The TUG OF WAR going on inside of Hero is REDONK and this is PERFECT.

Long story short, I think you're a mind reader and thank you so so so so much for sharing this!!!

<3

[honeybadger118]

"Maybe we're fools"

BROK X MIMIR

Happens after the events with the fates and Mimir has been feeling down about what they said about him. Brok comforts him. Btw Mimir has a body here to make this a little more normal.

With Kratos and Freya gone to Asgard and Tyr away, Mimir has taken to sighing to himself every hour or so. He offered to go with them but having his body back and still getting used to now moving on his own he knew he would slow them down. 

Brok looked up from his work to see Mimir sighing again and looking at the window. 

“ What the hell’s his problem?” he gruffly gestured at Mimir. 

“ I don’t quite know but ever since they came back from seeing those fates he’s been acting like that” whispered Sindri as he cleaned the kitchen

“ I didn’t think that old goat had any insecurities considering he’s the smartest man alive and whatnot ” he remarked

“ Well, whatever it is, it’s been bothering and he hasn’t said anything to anyone”

Brok didn’t think it was any of his business what Mimir got up to but when Sindri stepped out to sweep the outside he found that the silence and Mimir’s obvious upset mood were suffocating

Damn Mimir, fucking making me all distracted so I can’t fucking work.

He decided to try and at least ask Mimir what happened out there. So, he set his tools down and walked over to him. Not one to beat around the bush or be subtle he said “ Well what the hell has you in the dumps?” 

Mimir stopped looking at the window and turned to Brok with sad eyes. 

When he said nothing Brok continued “ I figures you’d be celebrating and fucking jumping from joy at the copy of your old body that Freya made or something”

“ Well, I didn’t think you cared about my well being enough to ask Brok” Mimir chuckled

It was obvious to Brok,though, that the laughter did not reach his eyes and he was obviously trying not to answer.

Brok loses what little patience and remarks “ Alright, what the hell’s your problem? It’s obvious whatever those damn fates said bothered you”

“ Alright, you got me there. It's just that ever since we traveled to the dwarven realm I’ve been seeing with my own eyes just how terrible I was while working under Odin. Those fates said that after all this time I haven’t changed and as much as I hate to listen to them. Deep down ‘i'm inclined to agree” he said looking away

He felt embarrassed admitting this to the one person he'd been constantly arguing with since this whole mess started.

“ While Odin imprisoned me on the tree I never truly sat down to think about how many lives I’d affected trying to please that one-eyed fucker” he spat

“ Listen, I’ve alive for a long time and I’ve pissed off more fuckers than weapons I’ve made” he said

“ If I were you I’d do my best to fix whatever shitshow you caused, feeling guilty does nothing for anyone.You do what you can and then some.” he said while looking Mimir right in the eyes. That comment made Mimir look at Broke in a way he never had before. He was grateful that despite their obvious differences he tried to make him feel better.

 “Besides you’re probably gonna fuck up again in the future so don’t dwell to deeply in the past ” With that, the tender moment they had was broken by Brok’s comment.

Mimir’s eyes widened before bursting out into a hearty laughter as he slapped his knees ( yk that thing old men do) from amusement. 

Brok never really got a chance to see Mimir’s face while he laughed considering he was always strapped to Krato’s ass but as he saw the color rise to his cheeks from laughing so loudly he felt his own get red( or purple since he's blue) for a whole other reason. 

A few hours later Sindri came back having finished sweeping the front. As he put his cleaning supplies away and started disinfecting his hands he noticed that the tension had dissipated. Instead he saw Mimir curled up reading while setting a chair facing Brok and Brok kept working on a shield. He managed to peek at the smile Brok wore. 

He’d have to ask him what happened later.

@wafflesfan I hope you enjoyed this

[cyborg-franky]

Saw you did emergency requests.

I know you get a lot of these, feel free to ignore because I don't wanna burden you with anything.

If you wanna do it, here's my conditions in the request.

Ace x female Reader - Ace comforts reader who has a mental breakdown. I just want cuddles and kisses from someone I love so much.

Things I'd like to be included (you don't have to this is just to make it more personal)

- I have an emotional breakdown constantly

- I procrastinate too much that my grades are terrible.

- I'm always the therapist friend my no one ever helps me or indulges in my interests, so I end up feeling like trash as I sit there and listen to everyone else's lives.

- Too many toxic friends to count.

- I'm super lonely.

- I just wish I wasn't here. (Not in a suicide way just wanna hibernate for a while)

- my parents don't really believe I have mental illnesses.

- still suffer from bereavement because my therapist said my problems don't matter.

Sorry if this is too much. I love you Franky and I hope you look after yourself. You're amazing and deserve the world!

I have been there too many times myself my dear. I know how awful that is and I hope this helps you feel some comfort. I'm sorry this is a little later then I normally do them. If you need to vent you can reach out <3 and thank you for kind words, I love you toooo

Ace x F!Reader SFW Modern AU

- You were tired, burnt out, your mental health caused you to procrastinate too much and then it added to the growing list of issues that weighed down on you. - Ace watched as you typed away at your phone every night always being the one that people came to when they needed help, he noticed it was never the same way. - Your parents refused to believe you had problems, he didn't like your parents, it's why he always made you come and stay over his apartment when he could tell you were having an extra bad time. - When your so called friends weren't texting you about all their problems they were no where to be seen. He hated them too. - He'd suggested getting rid of them, you didn't need that toxicity in your life but you claimed you needed them, didn't want to feel alone. ---

You had been sat down next to him on the sofa, half watching a movie with him as you once again listened to your friend going on about something, they didn’t even ask how you were before the launched into their problems. You set down your phone, staring blankly at the TV, taking nothing in as you stared.

There was too much bubbling up, that was the last straw. Ace snapped his attention to you when you let out a cry. Tears running fast and free ad you absolutely broke apart before his eyes. His first reaction was panic, he wasn’t ever good at his own emotions let alone someone else’s.

You shook your head when he reached out to you, crying harder when he tried to pull you closer, you didn’t want to be a burden to Ace, didn’t want to show you had problems too. Ace, however, wasn’t giving up. He pulled you against him, strong arms holding you to his chest.

“Shhh shh, I got you, I got you” He repeated over and over in a soft tone, he patted your back, rubbing circles, rocking you ever so gently, his chin rested on top of your head, holding you so tightly. Letting you cry, letting you get everything out.

“I’m here” he said, firm, comforting.

“Those people don’t deserve you, your so kind, perfect, I know you think you’ll be alone, but you won’t” Ace sighed, seeing you pull away to look at him with those tear filled eyes.

“I’ll never leave you” He kissed your forehead, letting you just be.

“I love you Ace” you mumbled and kissed his chin, he moved so you could give him a soft kiss on the lips. “I love you too”

[hanniejji]

We already have enough fluff and cute stuffs for maple. Let's make some angst 😼

One time you mentioned that maple's strength is extremely strong for someone that age. Kazuha would have to remind them that constantly so they wouldn't broke or hurts something...or someone.

Maple tries their best to control their strength and they try to be gentle with others. But maple completely forgets how strong they are when they are excited.

"A BUNNY! LOOK BROTHER! ITS A BUNNY!!"

Kazuha chuckles "Yes, you can go and try to pet them, but be careful okay?"

"YOU ARE SO CUTE MR. BUNNY!"

Okay I'm not sure how to write this scene (I'm not a writer 🙄😒) but maple hurt bunny...a little bit more...

4000 yrs later

"Maple? Can you try to eat this? Please, at least a little bit"

It's been a week since the bunny incident. Let's say that Maple isn't their usual self. They refused to do anything.

"why me?! I never wanted to be that strong!! Everything what I do is just hurt others!! I don't want this!!!"

"Oh my Maple, please don't say that. There are so many amazing things you did, and having that strength is absolutely amazing. You didn't mean to hurt anyone, and that is what matters."

"But why me!!! I hate it so much! I just don't want it anymore! I can hear you wince everytime I hug you! Or when I squeezed mom's hand! And now I hurt a bunny!!"

"Maple-"

"Just- I just to disappear, all I do is hurt others and do problems..."

Ya you can imagine what's next it's to late for this🤷‍♀️ anyway can i be new anon??

(🍑 anon if it's free😒)

WHYD YOU GOTTA HURT ME LIKE THIS? yes you can be 🍑 :>

maple is just a ball of curiosity, they're shy yes but every kid can and will get carried away when excited.

i've mentioned how maple can be very observant when it comes to the people they love. kazuha literally raised them himself, of course they'd be as observant as he is. so it's no surprise that they can see how people react whenever they get carried away. training can only do so much and they're still so young, still unaware of their limits.

it breaks kazuha's heart to not be able to do anything to help them, but sometimes his words are not enough to comfort them. ultimately, the only person who can help them is themselves.

so kazuha tells then that.

"you can curse this fate all you want, but doing so will only cause you more harm than to others," he holds them tightly in his arms, "the only person who can help you is yourself, maple. you need to understand that there is more to this power than just suffering. only time will reveal how you will discover its true value and potential," he'd wipe their tears with his thumb, caressing their red and puffy cheeks, "and while you do so, and while everyone cowers away from you, believe that i will always be right beside you."

[tinyboxxtink]

"Caught In The Storm" *Part 7*

I'm sorry I cut the last one at a REALLY bad part and this chapter HAS to end here. I'M SO SORRY It's so short!

....Especially because I think I'm gonna wait to post the rest tomorrow. {later today?}

I'm so sorry don't hate me!!!!

PART 8 IS HERE!!!

Tag List

@wanniiieeee

@gibbs274

@lolliepopsicle

@milkshqke

@chasingeverybreakingwave

@aprildecker-blog

@word-scribbless

@objection-argumentative

“Hey baby I grabbed us some champagne,” Nathan smiled, coming back with two glasses of champagne. “Hey guys isn't she amazing?” He acknowledged the others.

“She really is,” Olivia smiled back.

“Hey So--sweetie, I know that this is your big night. But I've got a really big case tomorrow so I need to take off. Are you going to be okay?” Nathan made a “Sorry” face.

You looked back at him, stunned. Was he really going to take off on your big night? You looked at the group of your family who didn't seem as offended as you felt; which was weird, because they usually feel more protective of you than you do.

“Are you serious?” Rafael suddenly came up from behind you out of nowhere. “You're going to abandon your girlfriend on the biggest night of her life?”

“Rafael.. I don't think you need to be so hard on him,” Olivia told him through gritted teeth.

Something was going on. Something Rafael was clearly not in on. He looked at Liv, still confused.

“How are you not more upset about this?” He asked her. “I'm the biggest lawyer in New York and I'm not even leaving for a case!”

“I just think that you should let Nathan do what he needs to do,” Olivia insisted.

“Whatever,” Rafael rolled his eyes while You looked between all of them with a super confused look on your face.

“I mean if you have to go, then you have to go. I'll see you tomorrow,” You smiled awkwardly at Nathan.

“Thank you baby I promise I'll make it up to you,” he smiled. “I love you very much and congratulations again I'm so proud of you!” He said before running off into the crowd.

“Can you believe the nerve of that guy?” Rafael scoffed

“Why do you care so much?” You suddenly turned back to him with an angry look.

“What are you talking about?”

“Why do you care what my boyfriend does?” You asked him again angrily. How dare he just insult Nathan like that.

“I don't,” Rafael scoffed.

“Bullshit,” you spat. “You constantly drag on him at work. He tells me things, Rafael. That’s what two people do when they love each other, they TELL each other things,” You enunciated, making it clear this was bigger than Nathan.

“So why are you so mean to him?” You accused him.

Olivia, Nick and Fin watched the fight unfolding between you two in nervousness, looking around as if they were waiting for something to pop off quickly.

“I just don't think that he's good enough for you!” Rafael finally yelled, causing the others to gasp softly.

“Barba, I really don't think that now is the time to start this…” Amaro tried whispering to Rafael, but he was too angry to hear anything.

“I'm sorry, he's not good enough for me?!” You laughed sarcastically. “Then tell me Rafael,” you started, with tears starting to form. “Who is good enough for me?”

Before Rafael could answer, you heard someone tapping on a mic. You looked to the stage to see Nathan standing there with a huge smile. You looked to the left and saw Sonny and Amanda had returned with food watching anxiously. You looked at Rafael who was staring in horror. You felt your heart racing.

“Please don't be happening….” You begged Silently.

“Hello all. I don't know if you know me but I'm Nathan Price, Y/N’s boyfriend. I know that this is the biggest night of her life, I know it's something she's wanted for a very long time, and I am so proud of her.” He looked at you with love and affection.

“And I know that tonight is all about her and her album, and her accomplishments and I don't want to take away from that but..”

“No no no…” you thought you heard Rafael whisper. You glanced over but Nathan started talking before you could see him.

“Y/N could you come up here please?” He asked.

Everyone in the room turned to look at you. You took a shaky breath and made your way up to the stage. You could feel the hot lights burning down on you like the sun. You knew that you should be absolutely ecstatic In This moment, if it was going to be what you expected it to be.

“I love you so much Y/N and I am so proud to call you mine,” he started. “And I want to be able to call you mine for the rest of my life so…” he knelt down and pulled out a huge diamond ring.

“Will you marry me?”

You could hear the whole room gasp and then go so silent, you could hear a pin drop in the room.

You looked out into the crowd searching for Rafael's face to see if he was excited for you or something else. But all you could see was the bright lights, nothing else. You felt your hands shaking, your whole body was shaking, your breath was quickening, you were sweating. You should be absolutely happy in this moment, here was this great man, asking you to be his.. his? Like you were his property? Whatever. He's asking to spend the rest of his life with you and he was a good kind man. And you didn't have anyone else.

After a very long time of you in your head, in a very awkward silence Nathan jokingly whispered. “Kind of leaving me hanging here babe,” with a nervous laugh.

“I am.. I.. well..” You took a deep breath and put on the biggest smile you could.

“Of course I will, Nathan,” You answered as tears were lining your eyes. You knew that people would think that you were crying in happiness, but you knew that they were for a different reason. Nathan smiled hugely and put the ring on your finger and then picked you up and spun you around.

“Now it's the happiest day of my life!” He laughed.

Afterwards you went and found your family in the crowd. They were all smiling hugely.

You knew this was going to happen didn't you? You asked

“Maybe... Olivia smiled. You looked over to Kelsey and Kenny. “And you too? Maybe…” Kenny Laughed.

You looked at Kelsey, who had a guilty look on her face. This is exactly why she was trying to talk you out of being sad last night. She knew that Nathan was going to ask you to spend the rest of his life with him, to trap you. Trap you shouldn't be the first thing you think of when being engaged you realized. Then you also realized that Rafael was nowhere to be seen.

“Where did Rafa go?” You asked innocently and you saw everyone's faces but Nathan's turned into weird looks.

“Oh I think he left,” Kelsey piped up. “I think he actually did have a case in the morning,'' she added with a smirk. You wanted to yell at her that he wouldn't do that, especially after he gave Nathan such a hard time.

You wanted to yell at her that she should have minded her own fucking business, and now she was setting you up to be stuck for the rest of your life. You wanted to tell her that a best friend would never let their best friend be anything but happy. But instead you just smiled sadly and said:

“I guess so,”

Outside the party, Rafael was standing outside practically hyperventilating. He couldn't believe that he had screwed this up so bad. He couldn't believe that he didn't stand up and say something while that stupid prick was talking. He couldn't believe that he hadn't said anything sooner. He regretted so many things, so many times and now he really had lost his chance and he'd have to live with it forever. He broke down crying as he sadly walked away from the party and you, forever.

[ethanharli]

Pairing(s): Kuroo Tetsurou x Top Male Reader.

Warning(s): Cursing, Angst/Fluff.

DNI; if you use she/her pronouns.

__________

A sigh ripped past my throat as I stared down at my feet with hazy eyes, feeling the rain hit my body without mercy while I sat on the curb, not wanting to go home to where my parents fought and argued for the millionth time, at least my twin sister is at her training camp so she doesn't have to endure this shit. Then there's the fact my phone broke during my mother and I's fight, so I couldn't call anyone to see if I could stay over, even though I'd rather not bother anyone anyways, they probably got better things to do than deal with my ass. Groaning at the thought I tried to wipe the tears from my eyes when I heard footsteps approach, "[Y/n]? What are you doing in the rain?" My eyes widened at the familiar voice, turning my gaze his way I saw my usual bed headed boyfriend standing besides me, holding his umbrella over the both of us.

His cat like eyes staring down at me with confusion and worry, something I could never get used too. "They're fighting again.." Was all I muttered out, running a hand through my drenched [H/c] hair in order to move it out of my face while Kuroo held out his hand. "Come on then you're coming home with me" I had no time to object when he was already pulling me off the ground, forcing me against him, which nearly made us topple over, but an unusual sly smirk was now present on his face as he looked up at me, but the smirk wasn't one of the usual ones that girls and guy's alike would swoon over. "Should we get going?" I could only nod, keeping my gaze on him while he laced our fingers together, practically dragging me along with him under his umbrella.

His coat had a few wet spots from loose rain drops, the red of it reminding me of his Nekoma volleyball jacket. His focus stayed in front of us, a lingering determination hidden under the beautiful hazel of his eyes that I could look into for hours, and the way he held himself with confidence is something I will always admire, wishing I could do so myself, and mean it at least. Feigned confidence is something I can do well, but Kuroo has been the only one to see past it, hell he even pointed it out when we first met. "Getting a good look?" He chuckled, tightening his grip on my hand a bit in a comforting way that slowly brought a heat to my cheeks, "Maybe.." I muttered out, quickly turning my gaze away from the shorter male when a small, genuine smile was brought to his lips.

As much as I tried I couldn't stop my thoughts from wandering to their usual dark place, staring down at Kuroo and I's joined hands with furrowed brows. How could he love someone as expressionless as me? I can barley smile, I can't speak my mind without being scared of what he might think or say afterwards, even if deep down I know he cares, and that he'd never do anything to hurt me. It truly makes me wonder, how someone as great as him, would want to be with someone as broken as me, it's simply a hard pill for me to swallow. The sudden tap on my shoulder brought my attention back, seeing that we had finally arrived at Kuroo's house, him holding the door open for me with that worried gaze of his.

"Sorry.." Walking inside I took off my shoes and slipped on the slippers I kept here, not really wanting to walk throughout his house since I'm still soaking wet. "C'mon you need to get in the shower, you're a baby when you're sick" He laughed, forcing me up the stairs towards the bathroom while my heart fluttered in my chest, wanting to hear more of his laughter until he finally shoved me in the bathroom, "I'll bring you clothes and a towel, then after we can cuddle on my bed." After that I started my relaxing, skin melting hot shower only taking about ten minutes since the idea of cuddling with my lover was all to tempting. So when I stepped out the bathroom, dressed in grey sweatpants and a T-shirt I looked around the room for the middle blocker, sighing in defeat when I couldn't find him and simply sat at the edge of his bed.

I laid the towel on my head, not caring for the little water droplets that hit my cheek, slowly sliding down to my neck as I looked at the floor.

"He deserves better than you! No one could even bother loving you! He's probably just a whore for your cock!"

My mothers words rang through my head as tears slowly gathered in my eyes, blurring my vision almost immediately. I always wondered why she'd bring Kuroo into our fights, telling me constantly that he'd be better off fucking a pretty girl then being a whore for a guy like me. I had never been so angry at her, I never cared for when she'd insult me but insulting Kuroo was out of the question, it was immediately after she shouted the word that I threw my phone behind me, shattering its screen and putting a hole in the wall. I hated fighting with her, knowing she's just pissed that dad wouldn't give her a good fuck anymore simply because he found his co-worker much more interesting.

Tears slowly flooded from my eyes as I let out a choked sob, resting my elbows on my knees as my head hung low, feeling my body tremble and my chest ache. My breath caught in my throat when slim fingers slid under my chin, pulling my head up so I could look into that gorgeous hazel I fell in love with many years ago. "It'll be okay [Y/n], I'm here" He whispered out, the soft tone was something I hadn't heard much of, but was calmed by nonetheless, my hand reached out, grabbing the front of his shirt and pulling him towards me, a pleading look in my eye begging for him to climb into my lap which surprised him greatly. Never once in our relationship have I initiated anything that involved physical contact, hell I couldn't even utter the words 'I love you' because every time I tried my mothers words would weigh me down.

However Kuroo still gladly slipped into my lap, moving his arms to rest on my shoulders while mine wrapped around his waist securely, burying my face into the crook of his neck, simply wanting the touch of my lover against me. The feeling of Kuroos fingers running through my hair slowly calms my painful sobs, turning them into quiet sniffles, taking a deep breath of his scent that I craved for everytime he was away. My hands stayed on the small of his back, pulling away from the hug just enough so I could rest my forehead against his, brushing our noses together softly as I stared into his eyes that looked torn from my own broken gaze. "Sometimes I think my mother is right, I truly believe I don't deserve you, you've always been there for me no matter what and what have I ever done in return? She makes me feel like I'm just dead weight to you, and honestly most the time I believe it."

Before he could interrupt I brought my hand to his cheek, brushing my thumb along his cheekbone in order to cut him off, "You always stuck to me though, even when so many people threw themselves at you, people that could've been so much better for you, you still chose me, an emotional broken wreak of a man." He stayed silent as I talked, biting his lower lip with a twinge of something hidden behind those pools of hazel, watching me intently when my gaze shifted towards his lips, moving my hand so that my thumb could pull his lower lip from his teeth.

"But god damn you manage to make me feel so fucking special" I whispered out, feeling his grip on my hair tighten by a fraction as I captured his lips with my own, loving how surprisingly soft they felt against my own, but the kiss ended as soon as it started, even though I couldn't bring myself to pull away to much. "I want to be with you for as long as you'll let me, cause fuck Tetsurou I love you to much to let you go" I mumbled against his lips, looking into his half lidded eye's that brightened with so much happiness they literally teared up, and being anxiety filled I thought I had made him upset for a moment, but that thought quickly left when he smashed his lips against mine with so much force that I fell against his bed.

He had the biggest smile I've ever seen as he pressed his palms against my chest, looking down at me with a loving look I happily returned, smiling back at the bed headed male, "You have no idea how long I've waited to hear that! God I love you, you idiot!" He laughed, leaning down to press a, this time, soft kiss against my lips.

"I love you too Testu."

[mithranqueersmusings]

I Think I'll Love You Too III

Chapter: 3/?

Rating: U

Summary: George and Ringo have been going out officially for a couple of months. Ringo anticipated that dating a stripper would be complicated, but he didn't understand exactly how complicated it would be.

Tags: Modern AU, Established Relationship

Pairing: George Harrison/Ringo Starr (Background McLennon)

AO3 link here / Fic masterlist here

Ringo hadn't been back to The Helter Skelter since he and George had started dating, much to the disappointment of John who had been begging constantly. However there cane a point where George began to grow suspicious, evidently he was worried that his relationship history was beginning to repeat itself. Not that he expressed any of these concerns to Ringo, instead he dropped passive aggressive hints and made vague comments which unfortunately reminded Ringo of the potential downsides to dating. Once the clues had been deciphered, Ringo vowed to return to the club the following night which seemed to please both John and George.

"You're not gonna get jealous are you?" George had asked while getting ready for his shift "Because if you are, just don't come."

Ringo certainly wasn't enjoying the harsher side of George but he understood the defensive tactic well "Of course not." He sat behind George who was doing his makeup in the mirror and wrapped his arms around his waist "What have I got to be jealous about?"

"I'm just saying..." George leaned in to the touch "You might think you won't get jealous, but when you see me rubbing my arse on some ugly bloke you might flip."

"George." Ringo said sternly "Stop worrying, please. I'll be just fine."

"Hmm, if you're sure." George sounded distracted as he coated his eyelashes in mascara.

Ringo had headed back home when George had left for work, he saw no use in hanging around the club so early in the evening. He caught up on some much needed sleep, his body was still rather exhausted. When night fell, John was excitedly knocking on Ringo's door. Awakening feeling groggy and disoriented Ringo shuffled over to open it. John burst in immediately, swinging the door so violently that Ringo had to jump backwards to avoid being hit.

"Jesus!" Ringo scolded "Could've taken my nose off."

"I'd be doing you a favour." John joked with a grin, collapsing onto Ringo's sofa "You got anything to drink?"

"Nice to see you too." Ringo scoffed, closing the door.

The two of them shared a few cold beers before heading out to the club, blasting the radio as they drove through the night. John was eager to see Paul, even though they'd spent the last few nights together, it was refreshing for Ringo to see his best friend so happy.

Ringo had forgotten how loud the music had been, the vibrations rattling in his ears as they made their way past the bouncer and into the warmth of the club. It was relatively packed, unsurprisingly for a Saturday night, but luckily their usual seats at the bar were free. John didn't even have to order a drink, as soon as he sat down he was being served without a word. Ringo supposed it would be an impressive sight if they weren't in a strip club, the thought passed his mind that John had paid the bartender prior just to make him look cool.

Ringo didn't recognise the dancer on stage, they had short platinum blonde hair and intricate tattoos dotted across their skin. Neither of them paid much attention, far more invested in their own conversation. Eventually they were shooed away from the bar to make room for other customers, so they sat at the back of the rows of chair and continued their nonsensical discussion as best they could.

"Ey up." John's tone changed as he nodded his head towards the stage "Someone's got their eye on you."

Ringo didn't register the words entirely at first, both his thoughts and visions gradually  blurring as he drank more and more. John nudged Ringo to direct his attention, the dancer was making their way through the throng of customers who were eagerly waving money in the air. Gradually they maneuverered over to Ringo and John, swinging their hips with their eyes glued to Ringo.

"Shit." Ringo breathed with a hint of a laugh.

He looked around the room to see if George was around, but there was no sign of him. As the dancer got closer and closer, Ringo figured there was nothing he could do but humour them and to get the whole thing over with as soon as possible. He could hardly complain, it was the guy's job after all. John seemed ready to burst into a fit of laughter upon witnessing Ringo's dilemma, his face scrunched up in an attempt to keep it in.

It was strange to compare the difference in emotion Ringo felt when being singled out by this new dancer versus how he'd previously felt with George; surprisingly the nerves were still present but were far more of a negative rather than actual excitement. Ringo leaned back in his chair a little in an attempt to gain some distance from the blonde dancer who had begun gyrating in front of him, but the gesture was mistaken for encouragement as he only intensified his lewd movements. John's laughter began pouring from his pursed lips, luckily the music masked the noise so that the dancer took no notice.

Ringo felt a hand on his shoulder, he assumed it was John trying to further his discomfort but then he heard shouting behind him and he knew something was up. Turning his head, Ringo saw an extremely pissed off looking George.

"You trying to be funny?" George was yelling, his hand possessively pressing down on Ringo's skin.

The other dancer seemed unfazed, passing George a momentary glance before reaching his hand forward to caress Ringo's cheek; at least that's where Ringo assumed he was aiming for it never reached it's destination. George gripped the dancer's wrist, the anger in his face melting away into a strange kind of satisfaction.

"Watch it." George spoke in a low voice, Ringo hardly even heard it.

By this point John was unable to restrain his emotions, his mouth agape in shock for a few moments before laughing again; George paid no attention to him, his dark eyes fixed solely on the blonde in front of him. He tried to shake George's hand off, it was causing quite the scene, but couldn't. After a few more moments of struggling, George released his grip and the dancer shuffled sheepishly away and attempted to finish their number with the little dignity they had left.

Ringo started laughing now, mostly because he was nervous, but was silenced when George ordered him to meet him outside. John gave Ringo a look which said 'good luck' with a mixture of both encouragement and worry.

In the cold air of the night Ringo felt himself sobering up a little, he hadn't fully registered the whole situation but it still felt pretty comical to him, though that may have just been the alcohol.

"You alright?" Ringo broke the silence, offering George a cigarette who snatched it.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah." George mumbled as he lit it.

"One too many 'yeah's there, I think." Ringo chuckled.

George just looked at him, saying nothing. Ringo knitted his brows together in worry.

"Er- You gonna say anything?" Ringo shifted his weight between his feet awkwardly.

George said nothing for a few more moments then finally said "I'm sorry."

Ringo laughed again "Sorry? For what?"

"I..." George broke off his speech with a huff "That was out of line. On my part, I mean."

Ringo rolled his eyes and moved closer to George, interlacing their fingers together "Don't be daft, George. I get it."

"But- I just..." George sighed, Ringo had never seen him so internally frustrated, he tried to speak again but Ringo silenced him with a kiss.

"You don't have to explain yourself to me." Ringo said firmly, his hands cupping George's cheeks.

"I- Alright..." George huffed, closing his eyes in an attempt to dispel the frustration "I really hate that new prick."

Ringo laughed, breaking whatever tension was laugh "I can tell. What's his deal anyway?"

"Oh, I dunno." George flicked his cigarette away "Think he's jealous of me or something. Can you blame him?"

"Not at all." Ringo hummed happily, planting a short kiss on George's now cold lips.

Ringo could feel the tension leaving George's body: his shoulders lowering, his breath slowing. He wondered whether he'd ever be able to have a drama-free night at this place.

"You wanna go back in?" Ringo offered, rubbing his thumb on George's cheek before pulling the hand away entirely.

"Sure, sure." George still seemed a little distracted, Ringo knew he wasn't being told everything "Let me get you a drink."

"If you're offering." Ringo smiled, leading the way back into the humid club.

"Will you stay until I finish?" George asked, sounding almost shy "Please." He added after a moment.

"Of course." Ringo held the door open for George to walk through.

Inside George led them over to the bar where he ordered another round for both Ringo and John. He placed a brief kiss on Ringo's cheek then vanished into the crowds. Ringo let out a huff of air, managing to find John who had moved to the front of the stage and was hollering even louder than the music. It was no mystery as to why, Paul was currently onstage spinning around the pole in a way Ringo only assumed was incredibly difficult. He was wearing no shirt yet a multicoloured tie was hanging around his neck, his trousers a sheer black material with relatively high platform boots on his feet.

When John realised Ringo had returned, he offered him a cheesy grin which revealed how drunk he really was. His face lit up when Ringo offered him yet another drink, accepting it gladly and downing it almost instantly.

"Everything alright?" John yelled into Ringo's ear, his eyes not moving from Paul.

"Yeah." Ringo shouted back, it was all that needed to be said.

As soon as Paul had finished his number, he sought John out in the crowd instantly and the two disappeared giggling excitedly into one of the private room. This left Ringo alone to think and, more importantly, drink. He spotted the blonde dancer serving drinks later on but avoided eye contact as best he could.

George had been appearing and disappearing throughout the night but Ringo didn't really mind, it wouldn't be too long until the club was closing for the night. Ringo tucked himself away in a distant corner, finishing an array of drinks and scrolling through his phone aimlessly.

Eventually John resurfaced, dark bruises dotting the skin of his neck, with a very satisfied grin. He didn't hang around for too long, helping Ringo finish some of his drinks, before excitedly saying goodbye to head to Paul's for the night. It was a relief to Ringo, he no longer had to worry about getting him home safely.

George appeared only several minutes later, his skin covered in a sheen of sweat from exertion. Ringo smiled at him drunkenly, stumbling up from his seat and banging into the table which knocked a few empty glasses over.

"Ready to go?" Ringo asked "You're sober enough to drive, right? Because I am not."

"Sure thing." George pulled Ringo close to his body "I'm bloody knackered, let's just get to bed."

Ringo made a noise of agreement "Lemme just have a piss, then we'll go."

"You don't wanna go in there, trust me." George scoffed, nodding his head towards the toilet "It gets blocked every night, it's dead grotty."

Ringo curled his lip up in disgust "Really? I don't care, I'll just-"

George stopped Ringo from turning away "No, no, really, it's dreadful. I'll just get us home quick, alright?"

There was a strange tone to George's voice, at least Ringo thought so but his senses were considerably dulled from the alcohol. Ringo gave him a quizzical look but allowed himself to be pulled out of the club all the same, his stomach feeling a little sensitive as the car pulled out onto the road.

George was silent, his hands gripping the wheel tightly as he drove. Ringo wasn't quite sure what was awaiting him when they were fully alone back at George's place, but he knew it was something big.

[jjmaebank]

JJ Maybank - She Will Be Loved

A/N: This is based off the song She Will Be Loved by Maroon 5, I hope its okay I'm still trying to get back into the groove of writing again ://

I RECOMMEND LISTENING TO THE ACOUSTIC VERSION WHILE READING

Warnings: mentions of an emotionally abusive relationship, a lot of talk about struggling with self love and body image

Words: 1.9k

masterlist

+

Beauty queen of only eighteen she Had some trouble with herself

You were the most beautiful thing JJ had ever seen. He could stare at you all day. The way your hair flowed so perfectly in the wind on the HMS Pogue; the way your eyes glistened and lit up when you talked about something you were passionate about; the way you played with your fingers or chewed the inside of your cheek when you were nervous. He loved your laugh, oh how he loved it. He could be having the worst day, have got in a bad fight with his dad and your laugh would make him forget all about it. That's why he was always trying to be funny and cracking jokes; he wanted the satisfaction of knowing it was him who caused that beautiful sound.

So he never understood why you were so insecure, so broken. He noticed the way you looked at yourself, talked about yourself even, like you were worthless...and it broke his heart. You would always play it off as a joke every time you made a derogatory comment about your body, but JJ knew you better than that. He could see right through your facade that masked how fragile you really were.

He was always there to help her, she Always belonged to someone else

So JJ made it his job, his mission even, to be there to make you see just how special you really were. Every time you insulted yourself using a joke, he wouldn't laugh, instead he would tell you just how wrong you were. You wouldn't know how to respond to his plethora of compliments, all you could do was blush and look down at the ground, telling him to stop spurting nonsense.

But JJ wouldn't give up, he just wanted to make you feel beautiful, he wanted you to see yourself the way he saw you...absolutely gorgeous, inside and out. Oh how he longed to be able to call you his, there was nothing he wanted more.

But he couldn't. You belonged to someone else, Rafe Cameron. He hated that boy, not only for the way he treated the pogues but for the way he treated you. He knew Rafe planted these self-depreciating thoughts in your head; it was no coincidence that they'd started when you began going out with him. JJ just couldn't wrap his head around why you were with him, he couldn't fathom why someone as kind and gentle as you would want to be with someone as monstrous and selfish as him.

The truth was you were afraid that you weren't capable of being loved and thought that Rafe was all you were going to get. You were as in love with JJ as he was with you of course, but you'd convinced yourself he could never feel the same way, ignoring the blatant signs that you were wrong. Yes, Rafe caused a huge strain on your mental health, constantly reminding you what was wrong with you, but he said those things because he loved you. Or that was what you convinced yourself. He just wanted you to be the best version of yourself right?

You were so scared of solitude, of being alone for the rest of your life as you watched JJ fall in love with someone else that you were oblivious to the fact that this was in fact JJ's reality. He had to watch the girl he loved convince herself that a boy who made her feel worthless was all she deserved.

You would get into fights about it...all the time. JJ just couldn't bear the fact you were with him. He'd end up yelling at you for being so naive as to think what you had with Rafe was actual love.

"Can't you see he doesn't love you (Y/N)?" He pleaded, his voice cracking.

"You're wrong...he's the only one that does," you whispered sadly.

Those words were enough to break him. All JJ could do was stand there and look at you in complete disbelief, and so he stormed out of your house leaving you in tears.

I drove for miles and miles and wound up At your door I've had you so many times but somehow I want more

It had been a week since you and JJ last spoke, since he stormed out of your house. JJ was driving around The Cut after getting into a fight with his dad and receiving another beating. But the pain from his fresh bruises was nothing compared to the pain in his heart every time he thought about you, which was every damn second.

All JJ could think about whilst driving about in the rain aimlessly was how close you two were, how much you meant to him and how this week without you had felt like a year. He had you, you were his best friend, but he wanted more...and he couldn't keep it to himself anymore. He'd spent too long keeping it a secret and all for you to wind up with someone who didn't deserve you. Hell, JJ didn't even feel he deserved you, but he wound up at your door in the middle of the night anyway.

I don't mind spendin' everyday Out on your corner in the pourin' rain Look for the girl with the broken smile Ask her if she wants to stay awhile

He could feel his heart beating out of his chest as he stepped onto your porch. After hesitating for a few moments he finally plucked up the courage to knock on your door. He didn't know what to expect as it probably wasn't the most appropriate time to be confessing his feelings for you, his feelings that he was sure were unrequited.

After receiving no response, JJ decided if he didn't tell you tonight, he wasn't ever going to, so he wasn't leaving. He began to chuck small pebbles at your bedroom window, getting completely soaked from the rain that was pouring down on him. Finally your light turned on. You looked at your window and saw JJ and began to smile. But JJ could see how broken you were, despite being genuinely happy to see him.

You opened your window and shook your head in disbelief at the blond haired boy.

"JJ, what are you doing?" You whisper shouted.

"Can I stay a while? It's wet out here." JJ grinned. You nodded.

You let him in and urged him to tip toe up your stairs as not to wake up your parents who had miraculously slept through his racket. You both sat down on your bed, silence consuming the two of you at first, neither of you daring to speak first.

"I missed you," you whispered.

"Me too,"  he said, smiling through his sigh.

And she will be loved, and she will be loved

JJ took in your appearance, you looked...worse. Your eyes had dark bags underneath them as if you hadn't slept the entire week and they looked bloodshot. Your lips were chapped and broken, a sign that you had been chewing at them more than usual. It broke his heart knowing that your external appearance only showed a fraction of how you felt inside. You needed to be loved, properly loved. Not the love you thought you had with Rafe, but a love only you could bring yourself. You needed to love yourself, and he knew you wouldn't do so without help, his help. So he was going to love you the way you needed to yourself until you could finally see how deserving of it you were.

"(Y/N), I need to tell you something," JJ said gently, gazing into your eyes.

"What is it?" You replied just as gently.

Tap on my window, knock on my door, I Want to make you feel beautiful I know I tend to get so insecure It doesn't matter anymore

"You deserve to be loved," JJ started, causing you to tilt your head in confusion.

"What?" You asked.

"You deserve love, (Y/N)," JJ repeated seriously, never breaking eye contact with you.

"JJ...I-I don't know what you mean, I-I am loved, Rafe-" you stuttered before JJ interrupted you.

"You and I both know Rafe doesn't love you," JJ stated, raising his voice ever so slightly.

You went silent. You did know, you knew it all along but you'd just hoped the day you had to face the reality of it would never come. Rafe never made you feel loved, all he would do was make you hate yourself more and more. Tears began to well up in your eyes as you looked down at your hands, they'd began to shake and you'd started to chew at your bottom lip again, causing it to sting. You felt so unbelievably alone despite the fact that the boy you loved was sat only inches away from you. All you wanted to do was tell him the truth, about how Rafe was simply your attempt to fill the void in your heart, the void caused by the thought of JJ not reciprocating your feelings. This thought that you'd spiralled into a false truth.

"But I do," JJ whispered.

In that moment, it felt as though your heart had leaped out of your chest. Your eyes widened as you looked up from your hands and into JJ's blue eyes. They were full of sincerity, kindness, adoration...and love, genuine love.

"W-what?" You croaked.

"I love you, (Y/N)," JJ repeated, just as sincere as before, "and not in the way I love Pope, or Kie, or John B...I am in love with you (Y/N)."

JJ felt as though a weight the size of his entire body had been lifted from his chest. He stared at you in anticipation, dreading what words might escape your lips, but also excited. You stared at him in shock, not being able to believe what you were hearing. JJ Maybank was in love with you this whole time? How blind could you have been?

"H-how could you love me?" You asked in disbelief.

"Because you're beautiful (Y/N), inside and out. I know you don't see it, but I want to help you see it. I wanna make you feel beautiful. I don't care what it takes, hell I stood outside your house in the pouring rain throwing pebbles at your window so I could tell you this!" JJ gushed, cupping your face instinctively so you would look him in the eye.

You'd never felt more special, more meaningful, more loved. You let a tear slip down your cheek. You were crying, but for the first time in forever they were tears of happiness. JJ tenderly wiped your tears with his thumb as you looked up at him.

"I love you too, JJ Maybank," you whispered in absolute adoration.

"I love you more than you could ever imagine, (Y/N) (Y/LN)," he smiled, some tears of his own escaping at the beauty of this moment, it was everything he'd dreamt of and more.

He did it, he finally got the girl...and he, JJ Maybank, was going to make sure you were loved the right way.

+

a/n: dhfksdkf this is my first song fic in 2 years, I'm so nervous idk whether I like it or not but I promised myself I would post this, I really hope you enjoyed

[liemonyellow]

such unimaginable things - (a sky full of song)

read on ao3

previous

Summary: Roman just needed some space. Janus gave him all he had.

Pairings: roceit (requited unrequited love)

Warnings: major character death, implied/referenced suicide, roman angst

"I'm here to apologize."

Roman glared hard at Jan- Deceit, ignoring Patton's traitorous presence beside the slimy serpent.

"Save it. I’m not interested in hearing it."

Ja- Deceit's crestfallen face tugged at his heart for only a moment before he steeled himself. In time, Roman would might bring himself to forgive him, but he wasn't feeling very forgiving towards anyone lately.

"Roman-" The prince's sharp scowl stopped Patton from continuing.

"Are we done here? Unlike some of us, I have work to be doing and I totally have time to waste on apologies from people I don't want to see." He hoped Deceit could taste the bitter lies. He hoped they stung. He hoped he couldn't tell which one it was.

If they did, the yellow side didn't show it. Instead, he asked, "What can I do to earn your forgiveness?" To earn back your love?

There was something to his voice in the way he said it. Quiet. Vulnerable. Desperate, even.

Roman almost broke, but didn't. He wanted so much to pull the serpentine side into his arms and never let go, to kiss away the frown on his lips and the watery sheen in his eyes, to finally declare to him and all the world that he loved him, and at last openly accept all that silent, overflowing adoration he could sense so constantly from him.

But he couldn't. Not right now.

"Nothing," he said. "Just... leave me alone."

Patton put a hand on Deceit's shoulder and said something about waiting for another time. Deceit stared despondently into Roman's determined eyes before he turned toward the moral side and nodded. Roman's fists clenched tighter. No. No matter his unspoken feelings, or Janus's, he had to stand by his convictions. Why should he feel possessive or jealous over him when they had no real relationship beyond furtive glances, longing gazes, and lingering stares? (Even if Roman could practically feel their combined romantic emotions rolling off of both of them in ever-increasing waves.)

They left.

Roman stormed into his room, slamming the door behind him. He stood there, unsure where to look or what to do.

He spotted something yellow, buried underneath the disorganized heap of abandoned and discarded art projects that he hadn't yet had the heart to get rid of. Roughly fishing it out, a corner of it messily tore off as it caught on something else. He gingerly held the torn piece in place and gave it a good look.

It was an unfinished watercolor painting of some red-and-white striped roses laying alongside some nemophilas, with a fluffy bumblebee resting on one of the latter’s petals. He'd already painted in the bee and the baby blue petals when he suddenly realized he hated it, so he’d tossed it aside and ultimately forgot it as more and more of his unsatisfactory work piled up on top of it.

Roman was staring, mind adrift, at the mangled tatters of it clutched in his fists before he realized he'd shredded it, his fat, wet teardrops splattering and soaking into the torn scraps as they fell from his eyes.

He plodded over to his desk and laid the pieces down gently, flattening the creases and puzzling them together into a broken approximation of what it once was.

He pulled out a new, crisp sheet of watercolor paper, his favorite pens, and his very finest paints, and set to recreate the piece.

A sudden, inexplicable sense of dread caused him to pause mid-stroke. A drop of scarlet splattered onto the bee, which Roman hurriedly wiped away before it soaked into the paper. It didn’t, but the bee now had a slight orange tinge. It looked fine, so he continued, ignoring the escalating feeling of something being missing until he finished.

Hours later, he put down his brush. The new painting was similar, but not the same. The flowers were better rendered, the lines more confident and sure, the ink darker and richer, the watercolor more vibrant. The bee, however, was now nestled among the striped petals of the rose.

He considered his art for a few minutes. It still felt incomplete. He was missing something.

Without really thinking about it, he allowed his instinct to guide his hand, drawing out in looping curls some of the finest calligraphy he’d ever done.

For my beloved Janus

Roman realized he was smiling, but also tearing up again. He rubbed at his heart. Something was missing, still.

Then came a knock on his door.

It wasn't typical for anyone to knock. Roman left his door unlocked to let the other sides simply walk in or, in Remus's case, barge in unannounced. Virgil knocked, but his was much more hesitant and shy, not crisp and solid as this one was, and he had graduated to knocking and then letting himself in a few months after he was accepted.

Janus had never visited Roman personally. Not before that morning, and Patton had knocked then, a rapid, fluttering knock, greeting Roman with a sad smile before letting the other side take the stage.

Roman almost fell over himself scrambling to get to the door, yanking it open, his heart hammering in his ears as it pumped pure hope into his veins.

It was Remus.

Roman tried not to let his disappointment show as his smile faltered. (When did he start smiling again?)

Wait.

Remus never knocked.

"Hey," Remus said. He looked unblinkingly into Roman's eyes, some strange, unidentifiable emotion brewing behind his crimson irises. He let out a breath, looking away.

"I don't know how to tell you all nice-like and shit, but… he's gone."

Roman blinked, not understanding. "Who's gone?"

Remus just gave him a look. He seemed almost... sad? Roman almost wished Jan- Deceit was here to translate his brother's unusual moodiness. No one really got Remus, save him. Roman supposed he could understand how the snack mamba might learn to tolerate his brother since they were both Dark Sides for so long, but best friends? He didn't understand it, and probably never would.

Remus continued without answering. "Patton's pretty torn up about it, y'know. Probably thought he coulda stopped it. If I knew what he was planning, I would have stopped him. I know you would've, too.”

Roman had no idea what he was talking about. The strange sensation in his heart grew heavy with unfathomable loss.

His brother paused for a moment, chewing on his words, then said, “It's not your fault."

Wait, what?

Remus held out a pale yellow envelope.

"He left this for you," he said somberly and far too softly for his usual self. Roman took it, half-aware of what he was doing, focused as he was on the dark, watery eyes of his brother. "I'm sorry, Ro."

Remus gave him one last despairing look, then turned around and left.

Roman stared at the envelope for a full minute before he went into autopilot, breaking the seal carefully - absently noting the gorgeous floral design impressed into the lovely honey-gold wax - and pulled out the letter. There was a single, fresh rose petal, striped red-and-white, tucked inside the folded paper, smelling of sweetness and spice. The note read, in Janus's graceful cursive lettering:

As you wish.

And below it, in smaller writing:

No.

I'm sorry.

I love you.

No.

For the second time that day, Roman found himself weeping over a piece of paper.

Roman stepped into his room, barely registering the door shutting behind him.

He leaned back against it, sliding into a heap on the floor, clutching the letter to his heart, shoulders trembling violently as he sobbed silently. How had everything turned out so badly?

Janus.

Janus was gone.

Forever.

Roman had been planning to confess after the wedding. First, he would apologize, and explain that he'd done what Thomas would have done anyway, because it was the right thing to do. And, in this imagined conversation, Janus would have agreed and said something along the lines of, "You did what you thought was best, and however it turned out, you did well," and then Roman would declare his love, which he knew for a fact that Janus reciprocated, and then they would embrace and kiss and become the most sickeningly-sweet lovers in the mindscape. But instead…

This was all his fault, wasn't it? If only he had chosen the callback, if only he had let Janus say his piece about mental health without kicking up such a fuss, if only he had more gracefully responded to the reveal of his name, his wonderful, beautiful, perfect name that Roman never deserved to know, let alone speak, not after this.

If only he'd explained what he had meant by "nothing" and “leave me alone”.

Because Janus didn't need to do anything more for Roman to forgive him after he apologized. Because Roman knew he would forgive him, eventually. He just needed time. He thought Janus understood.

But he hadn’t.

And now he never would.

Roman cried.

[levbug]

𝐒𝐀𝐅𝐄— 𝐚𝐤𝐚𝐚𝐬𝐡𝐢 𝐤.

#pairing ー akaashi keiji x royal! gender neutral! reader

#warnings ー royalty au! a few curses here and there. also a mentioning of being locked up, not getting fed enough, arranged marriage (its the plot do beware), marriage to men older than 50 to a younger person, death of natural causes

#wc ー 2.2k

you lay on the grass with akaashi, enjoying the view of the stars above you. it had been months since you two have done this, and you could never tell when the next time would be, so you just savoured the rare calmness you only felt when you were with the boy.

as each day passed and your arranged wedding was nearing, you and akaashi found yourselves getting busier and not having enough time to spend with each other. it broke both your hearts' that, soon, you'd be married and it wouldn't be to him.

you desperately wished to be wed to him, but you were from different worlds: you being royalty and akaashi being the prince's, your brother's, most trusted servant. it wasn't acceptable in the eyes of others.

"so what if it isn't? it's not anyone's business on who i fall in love with. let them say whatever." you had responded angrily to akaashi after he brought it up. he shook his head and held your face gently between his calloused hands.

"i know, your highness, but it's not as simple as it sounds." he kissed your forehead. you relaxed as his lips touched your skin, smiling as you heard him address you by your royal title. his silly nickname for you made you forget about your anger. akaashi was the only one who could do that to you.

the consequence of marrying a commoner seemed like nothing, but it was everything. you would lose your royal status and be forbidden to ever see your family again. it was a cruel punishment, but you were tempted to disobey the rules and do it. maybe even start your own family with akaashi and live in the town.

but every time you saw koutarou's infectious grin, or heard your father's booming laugh that couldn't help but make everyone around him chuckle as well, or caught glimpse of your mother's soft (eye colour) eyes that matched yours, you would second-guess yourself. you loved your family, but you also loved akaashi.

akaashi had convinced you to stay with your family, despite wanting nothing but to go to marry and live the rest of his life with you. he had seen how torn you were and and decided to be selfless, saying he'd be happy to just be able to see you everyday surrounded by those you loved.

koutarou knew of your situation, but there was nothing he could do. he wouldn't become king soon enough, definitely not in time for your wedding, so he couldn't change the rules or call off the marriage. he knew how much you loved akaashi, just looking at you he could tell, and it saddened him that he was helpless in this situation.

your betrothed was the king of seijoh. he was a sleazy old guy with a bad temper and horrible manners. he was at least thirty years your senior and you'd be his sixth spouse. he disgusted you to no end. he touched you inappropriately on the first night you met and when you called him out on it, he dismissed it as a good ol' joke.

he had only chosen you to be his spouse because he saw a painting of you and deemed you physically acceptable. you knew if he found out about your courtship with akaashi, he'd have you executed, as he had with his last spouse. he was globally revered and he knew it, using it to his own advantage.

"keiji?" you called to him softly. he looked down at you with his beautiful dark blue eyes, awakening the butterflies in your stomach. 'gosh, keiji, you never fail to make me feel this way.' you thought, staring back up at him, cheeks heating up under his soft yet intense stare.

"yes, love?" he said softly, voice barely above a whisper. your heart rate sped up a bit at the nickname, as it was rare for him to call you anything but your given name or 'your highness'.

"i don't want to get married to that creepy old fucktard." your sudden statement caught akaashi off-guard and he couldn't help but chuckle. he found it amusing how even if you were raised to be 'proper' and speak only the politest words, you would do the exact opposite.

"well, you don't have much of a choice. when the king says he wants you, it's you he's gonna get." akaashi said, sitting up so he could look at you. "no matter how disgusting it sounds, it's our reality."

"i know, i know...it's just surreal how someone can just choose who they want to marry and the other has no choice but to accept, because if they didn't, it would possibly result in war." you sat up as well, glaring at the ground in frustration. akaashi noticed how riled up you were getting and held your hand in his, tracing small circles on the back of it.

"you know i love you, right?" he said, his grip on your hand tightening slightly. "if i could, i'd fight that sorry excuse of a king for your hand in marriage."

smiling at his sincerity, you scooted closer to him and leaned you head on his shoulder. you felt tears well up in your eyes as you thought of all those days and sleepless nights you had spent imagining your future with the boy who sat next to you.

"i wish i could stay and keep the life i made with you." you sighed. akaashi closed his eyes and just listened to your soft voice. "it's true, i'll never be over you because i've built a future in my mind with you and now hope is gone. there's nothing left for me to do."

akaashi's eyes opened as he heard this. "that's not true. as much as i hate to think of a life without you, you don't need me. you're wonderful, bright, and young. you don't need my love to continue living. and don't bother arguing, because we both know i'm right."

tears threatened to fall from you eyes and it took everything in you to not cry. "listen, (first name), i hope you know i love you, because i really do and i can't say it enough, but with the king, you'll survive. you'll be safe with him, and i'll be content knowing you are."

the tears you had been trying to stop earlier were now falling freely from your cheeks. akaashi took you into his arms and hugged you tightly, rocking you back and forth in attempts to calm your crying.

when your sobbing had been reduced to small whimpers and sniffles, akaashi held you at arm's length to look you in the eye. "k-keiji, puh-please promise me you'll al-lways love me." you hiccuped, your puffy red eyes staring at him desperately.

"i promise. and you promise to always love me?"

"i suh-swear."

akaashi had been wrong about one thing; you were not safe with the king. it had taken years for you to return to your home because the king had forbade you from ever visiting fukurodani when he found out you and akaashi had been exchanging letters.

the old sleaze had treated you like a prisoner, only letting you out of your room when there was an event or when there were visitors and he needed eye candy.

his son, tooru, had been much kinder to you. he was a year older than you and was extremely attractive. you thought you would've fallen for him if you weren't already head over heels for akaashi.

tooru would sneak up to the tower you were locked in and bring you some food, knowing that they didn't feed you enough. you were eternally grateful for him and constantly let him know.

one day, though, tooru was earlier than he usually came and this time he was accompanied by two guards. you recognized one as iwaizumi, as he had also occasionally given you extra food, but the other one had pink hair and you weren't familiar with him.

"tooru, is everything alright?" you asked the taller male as you heard keys jingling in the cell's lock. you were sure there was no event tonight, since usually a handmaid would be the one at the door, never the prince. "did something happen?”

"i'll explain it to when you get out." his usually cheery voice was devoid of all emotion. the door swung open and you jumped back, startled. the two guards helped you stand up.

you were a bit wobbly on your feet, as you hadn't been let out in a month. the guards noticed though, and held you by your arms gently as you walked down the stairs.

a million thoughts rushed through your head as you descended down the tower. was koutarou alright? was this about your family or fukurodani? were you being sent to execution? tears welled up in your eyes at the last thought, knowing full well that the king was merciless enough to kill you for no reason.

when you had made it down the last flight of stairs, you were sat on a soft, plush couch which contrasted to the cold, hard stone floors in your tower. tooru sat in front of you with a somber expression.

"my father is dead. he died last night of natural causes." he said grimly. as much as you hated the king, he was still tooru's father and you couldn't help but sympathize with the grieving man. the king had taken so much from you, but your humanity was not one of them. "you can go back to your kingdom, now."

"tooru, i...i'm sorry about your father." he nodded, and you knew those weren't the right words to say. you couldn't grasp the idea that the king was dead and you were just stunned at the fact that you were free again. "when will your coronation be?"

"friday." he responded with not an ounce of emotion. his usually bright brown eyes were dull. you pitied the poor man and suddenly embraced him. he was surprised by this but didn't pull away. soon enough, soft sobs could be heard from him.

you had decided to stay until tooru's coronation and then head home. the brunette appreciated your thoughtfulness immensely and promised he would visit you whenever he would have the chance.

when you arrived to fukurodani, you were immediately swarmed by journalists and reporters on the docks. they asked questions about your time at seijoh and what it was like to marry an older guy like the late king. it was nerve-wracking to be surrounded by so many people after being isolated for so long and you felt your anxiety building up within you.

luckily your guards had gotten you out of their reach and now you were on your way to the palace. your home. where your family resided. where akaashi was.

keiji.

everyday for four years you had daydreamed of what your life would have been like if you had married him instead. everyday for four years you wished to see his face and hear his gentle voice. everyday for four years you longed to be in his embrace.

when you had stepped through the palace doors, you had immediately run into your brother's arms. the king had been surprised by your informal greeting, but hugged you back, as he had also missed his sibling.

one you had pulled away from koutarou's embrace, you caught sight of the familiar messy black hair and gun-metal blue eyes you had fallen in love with.

you ignored koutarou's protests as you sprinted into akaashi's arms, making the boyーer, manーgrunt from the force of impact and stumble a bit before catching himself from falling.

as a result of so many years of not getting enough human contact, you had become a touchy person, constantly hugging others or touching their hands or arms as if to remind yourself that they were real. that this wasn't some concocted reality. as if looking for comfort.

when akaashi wrapped his arms around you though, you felt a heat flood through your body. it made you feel human, after years of being treated lesser than a pet. it was like a warm blanket placed on your shoulders after jumping into a cold lake. it felt like the feeling of sipping hot cocoa near the fireplace after playing in the snow for hours.

it was like waking up from a bad dream.

akaashi felt you shaking, hearing you sob breathlessly between his arms and looked at you concernedly. but he noticed that you weren't crying because you were sad or scared, you were crying in relief.

he wondered how awful the king had treated you. it angered him that he could hurt you so much. you noticed akaashi's furrowed eyebrows and the dark look in his expressive eyes, telling him to relax because it was fine now. everything was good. you were okay. you were fine.

you were safe.

[whiro-sh]

I don't want to keep going if it's not with you~

So basically I had this idea for a one shot and I thought, why not share it? I don't know if you'll like it but I had fun imagining and writing it so here you go !

Tw self-harm/ suicidal thoughts

>angst with a happy ending

Summary: The Doctor finally come back to Sheffield after escaping the Judoon prison. It has been six hard months for Yaz, will the Doctor be too late to save her favorite companion ?

(angst with a happy ending, cause I'm a sucker for a happy ending)

It had been six months, six months that the Doctor sent them back to earth. Forced to go back for their own safety. Yaz knew that, Graham and Ryan told her enough. She knew the Doctor just wanted to protect them. The boys had understood it and accepted it and if at first it was hard to go back to normal life, after a month or so they seemed to be okay. They were still missing their amazing alien friend of course but they had moved on. Graham had started seeing other friends more often and Ryan started dating Sonya.

The only one who hadn't moved on - who didn't want to - was Yaz. She had tried at first, truly tried. She went out with some friends, got a promotion at work and even tried having a date with someone but it didn't work out. Truth was Yaz was not accepting this situation, she couldn't forget the Doctor and the life she had with her, she couldn't imagine that the Doctor really died that day on Gallifrey. She had constantly this hope of hearing the engines' noise of her favorite spaceship, of seeing a blue box parked in front of her flat. She dreamt countless time of the Doctor coming back and each time waking up was awfully painful. The harsh reality was painful.

As weeks passed she slept less and less at night, not wanting to see the familiar face of the blond in her dreams. She focused on her job to forget how she hated being stuck on earth, not knowing if the Doctor was still out there or not. Her family did see at first that Yaz wasn't well but soon she learnt to hide the bags under her eyes and the trace of a night spent crying silently under her makeup . She began to live in a lie, putting a great amount of effort to hide how broken she was.

One night worst than the others, she cut herself on her right wrist to ease her pain. She hadn't done that since highschool but right here and right now she felt relief in the pain. So she did it again and again, taking care to hide it well too. Yaz knew she couldn't keep up like that, she needed help but who could understand her ? They would force her to stop if they found out. Yaz didn't want to stop, this was the only thing helping her to cope.

Graham was in his room when he heard the familiar sound of the TARDIS in his living room. It had been so long that he first thought that he dreamt it but when he saw the blond coming out of the blue box he realised all this was real. The Doctor was there, smiling shyly at him. She looked skinnier than the last time he'd seen her, her hair had grown too. She seemed fine though a bit tired.

'Hey' said the woman timidly

For only response she received a hug from the old man.

'I thought we'd never see ya again doc !'

She froze for a moment she'd forgot what it was to feel someone against you. It was soothing, reassuring.

'Are you okay ?? What happened !'

'Long story but I'm fine had a little nap of 2 or 3 days in the TARDIS and a good meal.' her smile grew wider as she felt more comfortable. 'Where are the others ? How much time as it been ? I hope they are okay, how is Yaz ?'

Graham smiled at all those questions, he'd really missed this crazy woman.

'Six months only' he said but could see the worries on the Doctor's face. 'Ryan is fine, Yaz is... Coping in her own way, I haven't heard a lot from her recently'

The Doctor could remember like it was yesterday the girl's face when she left her. It had broken her hearts but she had to leave, she had to save her fam even if that meant dying for it.

The sound of a door opening interrupted the duo.

'Grandad we have to go, Sonya just-' he stopped abruptly when he saw the Doctor. 'Oh my god, no way !'

'Hi Ryan' said the Doctor amused by Ryan's surprise. The boy instantly gave the woman a big hug just as did Graham a few minutes before.

'I'm so happy your alive doctor !'

'Glad to see you too.' she answer truly happy. 'Yaz isn't with ya ? I missed her, I'd love to see her'

Ryan's smile disappeared as he suddenly remembered why he was here.

'Sonya just called me, Yaz is in the hospital...'

'What ? What happened son ?!'

'Apparently she collapsed while on duty and was very pale so they decided to call an ambulance.'

A few minutes later all three of them where in the hall of the hospital. Nadja was there too, she'd just finished her conversation with a doctor.

'Nadja !' called Graham.

The woman turn to them and was very surprised to discover the Doctor by the boys' side. She wanted to ask her where she was during all those months but right now she was more preoccupied by what she had learnt from her daughter's doctor.

'Is she okay ?' asked Ryan.

'They said she collapsed because she was weak and tired, I knew she wasn't sleeping well but I never imagined it was so serious...'

'She going to be okay...' tried to reassure Graham

'That's not... That's not all. She also has marks on her wrists and thighs. How could I not see them ? He said judging from the cuts that she had been doing that to herself for a few weeks now.'

The Doctor felt a rush of culpability and sadness, Yaz's state was her fault and she knew it. She had hoped the girl would move on from her, build her life but it appeared to be quite the contrary. Yaz's was drowning, what would have happened if she didn't come back ?

'We saw nothing either Nadja but we're gonna help her now, everything will be alright' said Graham.

'Can we see her ?' ask the Doctor, she felt the urge to see the brunette with her own eyes and be with her.

'She's sleeping, the doctor said we can visit her tomorrow.'

The Doctor wanted to insist but knew it was useless, she would have to wait and she hated that. Her brilliant, amazing Yaz in such a poor shape because of her. The blond hated herself for not escaping sooner. Yaz kept her alive and gave her a motivation to get out when she was in the judoon prison, now she needed to save and protect her.

The boys went home for the night, the Doctor parked her TARDIS in a street nearby the hospital ready in the morning to run back and find the girl she had dreamt of for months. It was around 1 am when she received a call from Nadja.

'Doctor I need your help ! It's Yaz, she ran away from the hospital, no one knows where she is !'

The Doctor didn't wait a second, she ran a scan of the area for trace of artron energy. Yes it had been six months since Yaz had travelled in a time machine but she should still have some trace left on her. Indeed she found out that the girl was only a few box away from the TARDIS position. The blond stormed out of her ship and ran as fast as she could.

She finally saw the brunette, she was in the middle of an empty street only wearing her hospital gown. She seemed lost and scared like a little girl, looking frantically around her like something was chasing her.

'Go on kill me you stupid machines !' she yelled.

The Doctor wasn't sure who the girl meant by machines but decide to slowly come closer, hands up to show she wasn't a threat.

'Yaz.' the girl froze

'No... No it can't be... It can't be you !' the brunette wasn't trusting her own eyes. If the Doctor was her it must meant that she was dreaming. The blond took a new step toward her.

'Hey Yaz, it's okay I promise..'

Yaz took a step back.

'No ! You said that the last time, but you disappeared, you left me like you always do ! I wake up and you're not here' she said now sobbing.

This broke the Doctor's hearts.

'Oh Yaz, my beautiful Yasmin Khan, what did I do to you.'

'The Cybermen I heard them, they are coming.'

'What do you mean ? Is that why you ran from the hospital ?' the Doctor asked taking her sonic to scan the area. No trace of any alien species. No Cybermen. 'Yaz it's okay, what you heard must of been some machines in other rooms next to yours. You're safe I swear.'

'How are you really here... You're DEAD ! You're-You're...' she cried harder falling on knees. She was exhausted, body trembling in this cold night.

The blond came closer and fell next to Yaz and she noticed the bandages around the girl's wrists. She was so angry at herself for letting that happen. She pulled Yaz in a tight hug.

'I'm so sorry Yaz, so sorry. I'm real I promise. I'll be here tomorrow when you'll wake up, I want to be by your side and never leave you again.'

This felt real thought Yaz, she wanted to believe this was real. Tomorrow she'd be sad again but for now she just enjoyed the warm embrace.

The Doctor took out her coat and put it on Yaz shoulders, she also noticed the girl was barefoot and decided to scoop her in her arms.

'It's okay now...' whispered the Doctor.

'I miss you so much... I love you Doctor.' the brunette whispered back before falling unconscious.

Yaz woke up the next morning in her hospital room. The first thing she felt was sadness as she opened her eyes to see the bedside empty. That's why she didn't like to sleep but before her thoughts could go farther she heard a familiar voice.

'Hey you...'

The brunette turn her head and saw the Doctor.

'So it was real...' she said softly, genuinely smiling for the first time in months.

'Pretty much yeah...'

'You've come back, you're here.' the girl stroke the Doctor cheek gently like to make sure the woman wasn't an illusion.

'I'm here Yaz and I love you too.' said the Doctor gently but serious.

Yaz's smile grew wider and she did what she didn't that day in the TARDIS just before the blond left her and the other humans. Yaz leaned forward and kissed the Doctor.

They didn't hear Graham, Nadja and Ryan enter the room.

'Seems like things should alright for those two now' said Graham glad and relieved.

The End

[wwhitewwolff]

Good morning

Bucky Barnes X Reader

Warnings: cheating, insecurities, lies, angst, misleading storyline?? This one is long

Summary: when Bucky stops texting his long distance girlfriend good mornings each morning she gets suspicious, going back to America to visit him she's in for a surprise she had never expected.

A/N: guess who's writing again? No one because no one guessed because like 3 people will read this and it will be dead forever *shrug* I feel like this storyline is really misleading so, sorry? Also AOS is a main theme for this but if you don't watch the show it really doesn't matter

This is Bobbie btw for anyone who wants to know what she looks like for this

It had been over a year since you had seen your boyfriend, well properly seen your boyfriend, moving back to England was a hard decision for you but you knew it was the best one, you knew that taking the promotion was the best thing you could do but your mind was still constantly plagued with insecurities and worries, but you knew Bucky wasn't like that, he could never? Could he?

It had started about 3 months ago, his usually cheerful morning texts which never failed to bring a smile to your face had stopped, almost ceased to exist, from his constant hey, baby! How's my gorgeous girl? To his babyyy! Wake uupp! It's been too long! Facetime me when you're free my pretty doll. his morning texts had fallen to a simple hey or I'm busy we'll talk later and the main fact he never bothered to text first anymore had caused your usual insecurities to skyrocket, why did he never have time to send you a simple hello anymore? Or more importantly who meant he didn't have the time?

Your phone buzzed as you say in bed, mind plagued by thoughts, you immediately shot up, hopefully Bucky had gone back to usual? Opening your phone you had found a simple text from your boss Phil 'meet me in the headquarters at 10', why was Phil in England? More importantly why did he need to see you?

Standing up you prepared yourself for the day to come.

"Hey y/n/n!" Your good friend and teammate Bobbi chirped as she brought you your regular morning drink

"mornin' Bob" you slurred out as you wrapped your coat around your frame tightly, shivering as you took in the very open windows.

"someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed today. Argh! No! Stop throwing things at me!" Hunter shrieked as Bobbi began throwing pillows at him.

"Wow, adorable couple" you mumbled as you took in the pair, after getting remarried the pair had fallen deeply in love once again, you wished you could have that but unfortunately being the director of S.A.B, shield associations Britain you barely had the time to speak to Bucky, yet alone the time to break up with him or move on, whereas normal couples may have fallen apart you were way to busy to even think about dating or parties or even making new friends, you stuck to your own lane.

"hunter! Barbra!" A familiar, fatherly voice boomed as the familiar figure of Phil Coulson stepped into the office, taking in the pair he hadn't seen since Russia "I thought you two were never coming back to shield?" He grinned happily

"we could never leave our dear y/n alone in a country! She's so far into work she hasn't even been shopping yet!" Bobbie exasperated "and please, Phil! Dont call me Barbra! Barbra is far worse than any possible nickname you could give me!" The blonde grinned cheekily

"Bobbie, stop being so dramatic, we went shopping last month!" You shook your head playfully as you took a seat at your desk, gesturing for Phil to sit opposite you beside Hunter -who had perched himself happily onto one of the plush leather chairs-

"I need you to come back to New York for a while" Phil stated softly

"what? Really? Ohmygosh nofreakingway!" You shrieked happily

"English, y/n/n!" Hunter playfully chided, wagging a finger at you as you practically glowed, you had missed your friends and especially Bucky.

"when?" You asked excitedly

"next month, I'm sending agent Piper to hold things down till you get back here" Phil smiled at the young woman, barely reached her late 20's and still so experienced yet full of life. A small smile graced his lips as he watched the h/c girl jump up and start rambling.

• time skipy•

The buzz of the quinjet filled your ears as you stepped off, e/c orbs wandered as you took in the familiar tower in which your boyfriend and some of your closest friends lived, sighing deeply you grabbed Bobbi's hand and quickly guided her to the doors

"nervous?" She asks over the low rumble of the quinjet ascending back into the air and back to the main s.h.i.e.l.d base. Turning your head to face Bobbi you opened your mouth to deny but quickly remembered how useless it would be- you knew the spy since s.h.i.e.l.d academy! She knows you better than you do and vice versa

"I don't know why, b! I mean I'm going to see some of my best friends AND my boyfriend!' you blurted out exasperated, anyone walking past might have looked at you like you're crazy but Barbara Morse was your best friend in the entire world and she had seen much worse than you screaming out into the rough winds.

"y/f/n" she stopped walking abruptly piping your linked arms backwards with her "has Bucky been acting weird with you?" She asked inquisitively, shrugging you immediately regretted not speaking to her about Bucky before, she would have helped. "Oh y/n/n; you didn't you tell me? No wonder you're so skitterish today! Whatever it is I'm sure it's nothing too big, Bucky loves you and I can even tell that without meeting the man! He's probably on a mission or something, he IS an avenger" Bobbi calmly rubbed your back as she spoke, guiding your hand to the identification scanners.

"thanks Bob, you always know how to make me feel so much better. I love you" you sighed dreamily, aiming to annoy the woman "oh you cow! Stop being so corny!" The blonde laughed aloud and she lightly smacked your hand, walking into the escalators you began calming your nerves, you felt like a giddy teenager going to her first date. And you hated it. The fact that a few stupid texts had lead you into this trivial paranoid stage had fully set into your mind. It was Bucky for god's sake! James Buchanan Barnes, the same James who stumbled over his words when asking you out, the same bucky who arrived an hour early to pick you up for said date and almost died when he realised, the same Mr Barnes who quit the avengers (although for 10 minutes) to be with you. He was your Bucky and you don't need texts to know that.

As the elevator doors pinged open you and Bobbie stepped out and into the large lounge which occupied the avengers.

Looking up Steve's mouth gaped open before jumping up and accidentally flipping the table over as he ran towards you "Y/N/N! YOU'RE HERE OH MY! I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU IN SO LONG! I MISSED YOU!! AND IM SO SORRY ABOUT HOW HE-" Steve blabbered out as he squeezed hugged you tightly, barley taking in anything he was saying you were quick to end his ramblings

"'tevie! I've missed you and all but shhhh inside voices remember" you laughed as the soldier nodded looking like a lost puppy

"sorry y/n/n but I've missed my best friend so-" this was when Bobbie felt to make her presence known "hold up! Wait a minute! If anyone is y/f/n's best friend; it's ME. So sit down mate, she's mine" bobbie stated proudly, reminding you of your (then) puppy when meeting Bucky

Shaking your head you introduced Bobbie and greeted everyone else, sitting down inbetween Pietro and Wanda you looked around the room, the obvious man who wasn't in the room still plagued your mind "hey,guys where Bucky?" You asked with a small smile, the avengers a looked at you as if you'd grown 2 heads "what? Can't I see my boyfriend?" You laughed, greeted with silence you stood up "I check I'll check his room then?" You asked wearily before all but sprinting our the room, barely noticing how the room erupted and bob and Steve had run after you.

The elevator door closed as soon as you stepped inside, you were so confused, why was everyone so shocked? Especially when you called him your boyfriend? And Steve looked mortified! Taking a deep breath you stepped out and walked to your "boyfriends" door

"hmm yes buck!" A feminine voice sighed from the room as you neared it, stopping about a step away from the door you could almost feel the tears gathering in your e/c orbs, pushing them away you stopped to listen...not a sound came out, your mind must have been playing tricks surely!

Gulping a big breath of air you stepped forwards and opened the door quickly "Bucky! Surprise! I'm- Oh my god" your playful tone turned quiet and lifeless and you took in the scene Infront of you, bucky laying almost naked ontop of a scantily clad Natasha

•

Steve knew something was wrong the moment you asked for Bucky, why would she ask where Bucky is? Bucky had told the team he broke up with her to date Natasha MONTHS ago, then y/n called him her boyfriend and the entire team was stunned as it dawned onto steve.

Bucky didn't break up with his girlfriend, he was cheating on her with Natasha whilst the girl was off being a good person in England.

Steve quickly ran after his friend, Bobbie following shortly after as they attempted to keep up with the h/c girl, when the elevator doors closed quickly the man knew he was far too late.

"Rogers? Care to explain?!" Morse snapped as she stared up at the giant of a man

"buck...no" too in shock to believe Bucky, HIS Bucky would do this, words Jumbled and the man leaned against the wall awaiting the lift to come

"spit it out Rogers! If something is wrong with my best friend I need to know!" Barbara placed a hand onto the blondes arm, staring into his eyes as she searched for answers

"Bucky said they broke up, he's been seeing natasha since October"

•

Bucky knew he'd messed up, quickly scrambling off of natasha and throwing the blanket over her barely clothes body the ex assassin stared up at his girlfriend...well ex now he guessed

"you... little...I can't even.." you gasped out as you stepped back into the hallway

"y/n! Baby no!" He cried running after you

"OH FUCK OFF BARNES" your calm yet betrayed tone turned Malicious as you turned too him in a rage and screamed, the other avengers at this point had caught up and we're watching shocked, they had seen your angry side of the field or in life or death situations (or scariest of all, during monopoly) but never had you ever screamed or raised your voice at any of them and here you were fists clenched and body shaking as you stated at the man Infront of you.

"YOU ARE HONESTLY THE MOST EVIL MAN I'VE EVER MET! WHILST IM OUT THERE WORKING SO HARD FOR SHIELD YOURE WHORING AROUND WITH THAT SLAG?!" You screamed, natahsa at this point had stepped out and stared at you in shock

"Hey! You want a punch, bitch?!"

"she's not a slag!" The pair yelled at the same time, this just fueled your rage.

"OH FUCK OF! DON'T KID ANY OF US NATASHA YOU SLEEP YPUR WAY THROUGH LIFE AND YOU BARNES IM SURPRISED YOU EVEN GOT NATASHA SEEING AS YOURE SO FUCKED UP I'M EVEN SURPRISED YOU GOT ME!" you had no idea where this was coming from but rage and pain from all these few months had come crashing down on you

Feeling a familiar and protective arm wrap around your shoulders you expected the figure to pull you away, or hug you, or calm you but no- Barbra Mose does NOT tolerate betrayal and most certainly not when it's directed at her best friend

"you're surprised? Babes, the whore has probably slept around with half the world, i mean the cheap cunt probably had to flash her saggy boobs and that bitch ran to her with open arms" Bobbie stated, her voice strong and insulting yet everyone without even knowing this woman could tell that she was about to commit a murder.

"let's go, hun" bobbie stated, your energy gone as you pushed through the team behind you, however you stopped and turned to see that Bucky and natasha, although looking guitly had traveled to eachother, you turned back to face them and took menacing steps towards them, as soon as you were in range of the pair you cocked your fist back and bought it to the throat of your boy- your ex.

"bye Barnes, rot in hell with this demon of a woman"

And with that you called Phil, you wanted to disconnect the avengers from the S.A.B and told him that you would be extending your trip; it was time to step up as director, you were here now and your job was to make sure Sheild is at the top, and no sex obsessed dick of an ex is gonna break you.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Okay it's so bad I know but the first parts were in my drafts for so long and I need to start writing again, I accidentally deleted my Steve imagine AND the first Bucky imagine so I'm trying to get those back but I'm also trying to actually right again. No one's gonna read this I know but it was a fun idea I had that strayed far, plus as long as I like my writing I'll keep doing it and maybe I'll do a part 2? Idk

[creedslove]

Victor Being Jealous Of You And Hank McCoy - Headcanon

A/N: I'm still cheating on Victor but I can't stop! Send me help 💔

- Victor never thought he'd miss you as much as he did now, when he first broke up with you

- To be honest, he didn't even know why he had broken up with you in the first place other than the fact he was one stubborn asshole

- It didn't matter how many times you assured him you loved him for who he was and was proud of that feeling, he still let his insecurities get the best of him

- Which wouldn't be so serious if he had actually spoken to you about it, instead of breaking your heart the way he did

- Victor enjoyed the fact he had to soon leave on a mission, to let you know things between you two were over and simply disappear from your life

- He ignored your calls and messages, while you felt you never mattered to him

- A few months passed by and you were back at the Institute and that was what brought you and Hank together

- He was all the time kind and polite towards you, completely ignoring the fact you were once ‘Sabretooth’s s/o’, which still caused some people to be wary/make fun of you

- When he asked you to assist him during some tasks, you realized how impressive he really was, intelligent and organized

- It didn't take long before you guys bonded over things you had surprisingly in common

- What neither of you suspected was that Victor stalked and watched you from afar constantly. Needless to say, he hated seeing you and Beast that close

- Hank used to take you to small dates, or just spend a quiet evening listening to music with you

- However, you also missed wilder things like you did with Victor, for example hunting and hanging out in the woods

- You convinced Hank to take a night walk

- “Come on, Doctor McCoy, it will be fun!”

- He agreed because honestly there was nothing that man wouldn't do with you

- You didn't expect to have Victor following you two in the shadows so when he quickly trapped you against a wall you couldn't help but feel terrified

- “What, Y/N? You thought I wouldn't find out you were spreading your legs for this fur ball here?”

- Hank went in a full Beast mode and tried helping you out

- Both men attacking each other furiously, while you simply didn't know what to do other than beg them to stop

- The only thing that froze Victor, was seeing how desperate you were when he clawed Hank

- That hurt him so deeply because he realized you wouldn't worry as much if Victor himself got hurt in the fight

- He simply looked at you with anger and hurt in his eyes and disappeared in the shadows just the way he showed up; suddenly

- You quickly checked on Hank and sighed gladly to see he wasn't seriously injured

- Victor watched you snuggle closer to Hank as you both left the place quickly and headed home. He swore revenge because you'd be his again, even if it meant he'd take you against your will

__________

I hope you've liked it! ❤

@silverwing2522