#he’s bitchy but he also desperately wants to believe we aren’t that stupid actually

[grandwitchbird]

“Epic Pooh” is the delightfully scathing gift that keeps giving. I don’t even have this much beef with LOTR. Like. I agree. But I don’t know if anyone has ever had this much beef. 10/10 stay nasty Mr. Moorecock.

[shoutogepi]

“Fuck You!””I Just Might.”

Bakugou Katsuki

word count : 7.1k holy hecc

[ ✘ (nsfw!) ]

themes : nasty nasties hehe.. choking, angry sex, dom bakugou (what’s new lmao), lots of sexy vengeful teasing, & almost being caught (? idk what to call that haha)

bio : You and Ground Zero are far from getting along in almost every aspect… except for getting off perhaps.

author’s note : wow another smut whodathunkit !!! This isn’t super romantic (Happy VDay my sweets!!) but goddamn if u thirstin today drink tf up bc the SALOON IS OPEN AND HERE’S THE SPECIAL ON DA HOUSE

side note: (Y/H/N) = your hero name, also the sidekick is 100% out my ass not real bc I didn’t feel like doing legit research heheh. also, all characters are aged up to long past UA-grad in this (so everyone is 18+!!)

tagging: @lordexplosionsextra per request -- hope you enjoy bb :) happy vday!

also available on AO3 here

   ─── ・°* ﾟ✧:* • ｡ﾟ:*･☽･*: ｡ﾟ•*:✧ ﾟ*°・ ───

🄰rms crossed, chest puffing in defiance, your gaze shoots daggers into his stupid smirk. “I’m not your fucking sidekick, Boom-Boy, so you can crawl back into the putrid swamp you came from and take your damn paperwork with you!”

“H-hey now,” Bakugou’s sidekick laughs nervously, hands waving in front of him as he shakes off the jab you just took at him inadvertently.

Bakugou laces his gloved fingers over his lap and kicks back in his chair, straightening his legs so his boots rest on the table across from you. “Listen, Princess, you know the rules. Whoever gets the final blow doesn’t have to do the nitty-gritty shit,” he answers, shrugging nonchalantly.

“You only got the finisher in ‘cuz I was busy doing everything else! You pop in at the last second and get all the credit and no busywork? Fuck off,” you fume, hooking your foot around the leg of his chair and ripping it toward you. Bakugou’s eyes widen as he falls backwards, tumbling onto the hard floor. He grimaces at you from the floor, vermillion eyes ablaze.

“It’s not my fault you’re too stupid to strategize! Don’t start shit you can’t fucking finish yourself!” He barks, voice spiking with fury. Ouch, that one stung your pride a little.

“You’re such an asshole,” you snarl, shoving the stack of papers off the table. The pages swirl in the air and scatter onto the tiled floor, some landing on the instigator’s lap. Bakugou’s palms crackle as his breath is stolen at your audacity. Your sidekick lets out a startled noise, jumping at the sudden popping. Bakugou’s sidekick has his hand on his temple, attempting to rub out the headache forming at this mess.

Why did you two have to hate each other so much?

The two sidekicks stand stiffly against the wall as you shove by them, Bakugou glaring at your ass as your hips swing around the doorway, out of his sight.

It’s late, the purple sky littered with the lights of the lively city. The villain you— or Bakugou, you suppose— had taken down earlier had been the last job of the day and you’re tired of the stupid bullshit he always serves you when the two of you work together.

Usually your agency kept the two of you on opposite boundaries of the patrol area, but you had begrudgingly needed help with this last offender of the day. Your quirk didn’t do incredibly well against villains with close-combat styles, but you could still manage. Unfortunately, the guy that had been causing mayhem earlier was beyond powerful up close, and he had landed a hit that knocked the wind out of you and made you slower than usual. It wasn’t a major injury or anything, but you’d probably have a nasty bruise on your torso after you took off this goddamn gimp-suit of a costume. Luckily, you had visited the in-house, agency healer in the infirmary upon arrival from the job, and they had sucked the nasty welt off your skin and redirected it somewhere else as their quirk allowed. The pain subsided mostly, just a bit sore where the bruise would’ve been.

You close the door to your office gently, a heavy sigh releasing as you make your way toward the desk. It was almost quitting time, but you still had to finish up the paperwork from the other case you had dealt with this morning. Clicking on the desk lamp, you breathe in to calm your frayed nerves, eyes closing briefly as you try to find the energy to finish your work.

The door bursts open, slamming almost immediately and tearing you out of your attempt at meditation. Bakugou stands in there, steam practically billowing from his nose and scarlet eyes flashing with agitation.

“Who the fuck do you think you are?” He snarls, prowling toward you with an accusatory, gloved finger raised.

“Excuse me?” You quip, irritation revitalized almost instantly. “Who do you think you are, storming into my office after the shit you pulled today?”

He stops in front of you, glowering down at you. You turn your face slightly, your eye level meeting his chest and not wanting to look at that. He was kind of muscular up close like this, you’d never noticed because you’d always created the most distance as possible between you two.

“Oh, you mean me saving your ass? Yeah, my bad, woman,” he growls, letting his gaze linger on the way your eyelashes kiss your cheek bones as you scoff, eyes closed in annoyance.

You glare at him, infuriated. “I didn’t need your fucking help! Did I ask you to come?”

He takes his time to reply, stare holding your attention briefly before he licks his lips. “No, but your sidekick did.”

The sentence is like a cold slap to the face, and you push him backwards with newfound anger. “Don’t fucking lie to me Bakugou,” you seethe, hands clenched into fists. “If you’re gonna lie at least come up with something believable!”

“Tch. She did call me, brat, and she begged me to come to your rescue like you were a goddamn damsel in distress,” he grunts, breaking eye contact with you as he hunches slightly, strong hands shoved into his pockets. Bristling at the refreshed anger rippling off of you, he already knows what you’re going to say. “She said that shitty villain got his hands on you, yeah right you had it under control.”

You don’t know what to say. You can’t really refute that the assailant had managed to hurt you, but you still wish Bakugou hadn’t heard that information. The asshole already thinks he’s the hottest shit in the agency, you really don’t want to give him any evidence of your weaknesses. So you sit on the edge of your desk, sighing once again. “I can handle one hit, dipshit,” you mutter. “It’s already healed anyway.”

“Yeah, yeah, you can take care of yourself,” he grumbles, gaze flickering to your grim expression before he looks intently at the picture on your wall.

The silence that ensues is uncomfortable. You had never really talked to Bakugou before-- usually every time the two of you were together you were having a shouting match, throwing insults back and forth relentlessly. You aren’t really sure how to reply, and you absolutely did not want to acknowledge that he had come to your rescue when you actually needed him.

Bakugou is as silent as you are. He wonders where you’d been hit momentarily, before pushing off the thought because god forbid he show emotions. He’d already had his fill of feelings for the day. He sure as hell would never tell a soul, but the second he had seen your sidekick’s name flash across his phone screen this evening, his stomach dropped like he’d been the one to receive the villain's punch, not you. Shoving away the intrusive thought, his trademark scowl surfaces to his face.

“You know, I still haven’t heard a ‘thank you’.”

His irritating voice slices through the tension in the room, and you bristle at his impudence. “Gee, Ground Zero,” he ruffles at his hero name, a frown bending his thin lips,” thanks so much for stealing my job and taking the credit for it too, and really— thank you so much for the paperwork as well. I’m just so grateful.”

“Tch. Don’t be so bitchy, you know I saved your ass today so just fess up and thank me already. You’ll feel better once you spit it out,” he provokes, thick arms crossing over his chest.

“Fuck you,” you hiss, scowling at his smug face. The snarl that breaks his lips is ignored as your eyes turn to slits directed toward him.

He laughs at your malicious look, mouth transforming into a sleazy grin. He can’t stop himself even though he’s a tad hesitant, but his bold and loud nature wins out and he says cooly, “I just might.”

You gape at him, the smile on his mouth escalating your agitation. “W-What?” You choke out meekly, palms pushing you off the desk to stand upright.

He has the gall to grin, taking a step toward you. His heavy boots clunk against the floor, and you move backwards only to bump into the desk again. You cast a futile glare at the desk, and when you look back at him, he’s looming over you. “I think it’s time we acknowledge this thing we have, (Y/H/N).”

Your lips part in surprise, the blush tainting your cheeks slightly. “I have no idea what you’re referring to,” you stammer. Your arms crossing over your chest, he can’t help but notice how your breasts squish upwards, cleavage visible through your skin-tight costume.

“I think you do,” he chuckles with a low voice, gaze regarding the pink pigment gracing your cheeks. He savors it, lips curling into a smirk. His hands meeting the edge of your desk as he leans in, his body brushes against your arms. You rear back, shock evident on your face with lips parted as he tips his head to the side. He cages you in, an unfamiliar look simmering in his crimson irises. “You can feel the tension between us too. I know it, Princess.”

You’re once again at a loss for words. What the hell is happening right now? You think, mind reeling desperately to change the subject. “I hate it when you call me that,” you spit out, looking up to catch his intense stare. It wasn’t dishonest, you hated his pet name for you. Just because you weren’t as careless as him, he’d tacked the snide nickname to you awhile back because he knew it pissed you off. “It’s a stupid name that only your idiot brain could come up with.”

Take the bait, please take the bait.

“The way you treat me like I’m beneath you, what else can I call you?” His breath fans against your cheek and you hate to admit it’s fresh and minty, not at all as nasty and troll-like as you’d convinced yourself it would be. “But I guess that’s ‘cuz you really wouldn’t mind having me under your lap, right?”

You gasp at his crude suggestion, knees smacking together as your thighs clench automatically. “Fuck off, Bakugou,” your voice trembles slightly, your palms hesitantly landing on his chest. Your attempt to push him is less than half-hearted, and he smiles at your crumbling resolve.

His fingers skim along the small of your back, perching his hand on your waist. You can feel its warmth through your costume and his glove, and your body bends into his hold on its own accord, your ass pushing back while your chest grazes his. He exhales harshly, his other hand docking on the top of your stiffened thigh, thumb falling into the curve between your legs. You wish it was higher up, and the recognition of your craving makes your blush a few shades darker.

“What was that?” He snickers, lips brushing your earlobe as his nose pushes away your cascading hair. He didn’t expect you to smell so good after a long day of fighting crime.

Your fingers grab onto his costume, clawing at the material and you’re not sure if it’s in anger or desire. But Bakugou is sure, his fingers rubbing your waist as he glances at your restless hold on his costume. “Oh, bite me,” you spit out, your bottom lip caught between your teeth.

His lips touch your jaw, and you can feel the sneer that rests so prominently there. “Manners, Princess… say please,” he chides, tongue poking out to trace the soft skin there.

A quiet moan escapes you and Bakugou groans loudly in response. He draws his face back to lock eyes with you, stare taught with the tension the two of you have built over all this time.

“You gonna tell me you’ve never thought about us fucking?” He inquires, eyes darting to your lips and returning to your gaze. “All those times we riled each other up, every time we pushed each other’s buttons over and over— you gonna say you never thought about getting me to shut the hell up by any means necessary?”

Your eyes roll in your head, from a combination of lust and disbelief. You cannot believe you're letting him hold you like butter in his hot hands, melting you and licking you up. You glare at him, his lips just close enough to distract you. You weren’t going to let him mould you like putty anymore. “I bet you wanna think that I have, Bakugou,” you whisper, and he looks at you with mild surprise adorning his handsome face. Your blush infects him immediately, a flush spreading over his own cheeks and he’s suddenly very glad his costume has a mask. “You think I haven’t noticed you checking me out every second of the day, Boom-Boy?”

He seems at a loss for words as your wrists wrap around the back of his neck, pulling his face down and level to yours. His brow bursts into a sweat as one of your hand curls around his costume’s throat piece, trailing south and following the delicious line between his pecs down his abs. Your fingernails scraping through his costume, his skin prickles as he gasps. Your lips meet his stubbled jaw, mirroring the action he had performed to you a moment ago. His fingers tighten their hold on you, his body jerking almost invisibly at the contact. “You ogle at me much more, little Miss Priss,” he says cockily even though his voice sounds forced.

It was your turn to curl your lips into a sultry smile, half-lidded eyes regarding his shocked, eager stare. “I thought I told you not to tell your phony lies, Bakugou,” your murmur against his jawline, hand curving around his pelvis and to drag down his outer thigh. “It’s a sin to lie, you know.” Your fingers skim the very ridge of the bulge in his pants, teasingly tracing the outline and watching him close his eyes, his grin seeming strained.

“You know a lot about sins, then?” he pants, sliding his hand down from your waist slowly, fingertips stretching eagerly to push into your plush ass.

You nip at his skin playfully, and he shudders in response. Your raise your head to meet his hungry gaze, your coy smile still beaming. “I might… You want me to demonstrate my knowledge?” Your tongue parts your lips, eyes falling to his slightly agape mouth. Your breath tangles, and his eyelids flutter shut as your lips graze.

The hand on your thigh grips your flesh tighter and you whimper, your mouth tingling at the harder contact of the kiss. His other hand slides south and cups your tailbone, calloused fingers bringing your ass toward him. The sudden movement surprises you, and you grab onto his neck, making his chin dip down as your hips slide into his crotch. You clash into him, your lips colliding as sparks fly through the air.

You both moan into each other’s mouths, the kiss desperate and hot. Your tongue pokes out to probe his bottom lip and he gladly receives your wet muscle with his own. Your legs trapped between his shuffle as you wiggle your hips, savoring his fiery hands gliding over your figure.

Bakugou’s hands are firm but warm, caressing your waist and hips and heating them up. He growls as your hips buck against his, rubbing the tent in his baggy pants. One of his hands slides along the smooth fabric of your hero suit, cupping the swell of your breast in his large palm as his thumb runs over your nipple. You throw your head back, and his lips gladly blaze the trail of your throat with a scorching urgency. Your fingers move to his arm pieces, clamoring at the top of the machinery near his elbows. He gladly slides the gadgets off, placing them in one of the chairs facing your desk while he rips off his black gloves. He hastily throws the neck piece onto the seat as well before he turns and captures your lips once more.

When his fingers return to your hips, you can feel the true heat of his burning palms through your bodysuit, making you arch into him wantonly. His tongue battles yours fiercely, both of you fighting for dominance as his hands glide up to your waist and fumble with your belt. You can feel his rigid muscles through his thin tank top, your hands wandering greedily underneath the right material to touch his smooth skin.

Bakugou smirks as your belt falls onto the desk, hands falling and grabbing onto your ass cheeks eagerly, pulling you closer to his body. You take the chance to shove your tongue into his mouth and he groans at the impact, jaw slackening as he allows your tongue to take control. He grinds into you slowly, making your thighs tremble with apprehension. His mouth detaches from yours, and the string of saliva connecting your tongues is sliced as his shirt flies through the air. You drink in the sight of his naked chest, muscles swelling and flexing, tapering down into a delicious V that disappears underneath his belt.

You grab the belt, yanking his body close to yours again and sighing as your lips meet once more. “You’re really man-handling me Princess,” he comments amusedly into your lips as your fingers grapple with his belt, toying with the latch.

“Shut the fuck up,” you snarl, teeth sinking into his bottom lip and harnessing a moan from him,” and touch me already, pussy.”

His vermillion gaze ignites, mouth crashing onto yours as his fingers slide underneath the swell of your ass. He lifts you like you’re but a paperweight, and you moan as your legs wrap around his hips. His tongue crushing yours, his kisses so intense that your head leans back at the sizzling force. You jump slightly as your ass meets the cushion of your desk chair, eyes opening to see he’d rounded the desk and knelt in front of you. His knees on the ground, he looks up at you haughtily, hands coasting slowly down your legs toward your center. “Is this where you want me?” he feigns innocence and you glare down at him. His thumb hooks the crotch of your leotard, and he shoves the material to the side roughly, making you gasp.

The cool office air greets your cunt, making it throb even more in arousal. “Bakugou,” you whine as he watches your face, shifting your hips in a feeble attempt to catch his attention. He slinks down, lips brushing over your panties softly as he watches you squirm. He grins against the black lace, thumb curling around the skinny part of the thong over your asshole, making you shiver.

“You’re right Princess,” he grumbles, tongue gliding over the wet spot that had leaked through the material, inhaling your scent pervertedly as he closes his eyes in triumph. Your bottom lip is prisoner to your teeth again as you watch his teasing movements, unable to tear your eyes away from him. “Sometimes when you’ve got me all riled up, I jerk off thinking about how good your bratty little ass would look bouncing on my dick.” You can’t help but whimper at his confession, rolling your hips against his mouth in desperation.

He smirks up at you, crimson irises glittering with savory mischief. His hands snake around your thighs, clutching onto the junction they meet your hips with vigor. He pushes your body down into the seat so you can’t wriggle any longer, and he feels your cunt clench against his chin when he nips at your panties, teeth dragging along your clit. You wail his name again lowly, harsh breaths ripping through your lungs.

He growls in response, thumb ripping the lace to the side and exhaling at the sight of your swollen cunt, grin broadening at the excessive glaze that he had caused. “Fuck,” he laments, tongue poking out to graze your clit experimentally. Satisfied with the way your hand flies to cover your mouth, he places a teasing kiss there. “You know,” he murmurs against your slick nerve,” More than once I’ve wondered how hot and sweet your cunt must be, hiding underneath this skimpy little leotard.”

You let out a shaky breath, eyebrows cinching as you glower down at him, meeting his pleased gaze. “Why don’t you find out for yourself then?” you hiss, baring your teeth at his infuriatingly proud smirk.

“Bet you’d like that, wouldn’t you, Princess?” Bakugou’s tongue glides along the side of your slit, making you stiffen and shut your eyes tightly. Of course he’s a fucking tease.

A knock sounds at your door to pull you out of your collapsing mind, and you sit up straight, eyes wide as Bakugou’s sidekick peeks into the room.

Bakugou stills, unsure as to who it is, staying hidden behind your desk and still holding your hips harshly.

“Hey Y/N, have you seen Ground Zero possibly? He’s stormed off as usual and I can’t find him anywhere,” the sidekick says, blinking at you with unsuspecting eyes.

“Oh, H-Hikaru,” you gulp, hesitantly placing your hands on your desk. Bakugou is quiet underneath you but you’re preparing yourself for the little shit to pull something stupid.

And he does.

Bakugou’s tongue slips between your folds suddenly, licking a large stripe from the bottom to the top of your slit, sucking in your clit and rolling his tongue around it brazenly.

“Oh my god!” you yell, hand slapping over your mouth too late. Hikaru looks at you incredulously, regarding your pink cheeks and sweaty forehead. “I can’t believe him! W-what an asshole!” you pant as Bakugou sucks harder, your pussy clenching onto itself. “He probably left so you’d do the paper… mmm, paperwork for h-him.” You abs are flexed so hard, straining in order to restrain the mess of moans that Bakugou is summoning.

Hikaru finds your tone a bit peculiar, but he continues anyway. “Uh, probably… Are you okay Y/N? You look kind of… sick,” he comments, head tilting to the left. “Did you get that jab checked out yet? I can take you to the infirmary if you want. If it’s bad I can drop you off at your place, too.”

Bakugou doesn’t like that suggestion. He doesn’t need to lick his fingers, your drenched core welcomes the digits instantly. Your walls accommodate his middle and ring finger eagerly and he smirks as they sink into you, knuckle-deep.

“Yes!” you shriek, quickly shooting a glare down at the blonde, your hair covering your face from his sidekick. “I mean— yes, I had it checked out and I’m f-fine, thank you for the concern, Hikaru,” you explain, a forced smile on your lips as you silently beg him to leave.

Bakugou stretches his fingers inside you, scissoring them to coat them in your essence before he puts them together again. His wrist strained in the forced position, he flicks the digits back and forth, almost laughing in glee as he recognizes that soft velvety spot deep within you.

Hikaru blinks at you again before he nods half-heartedly. “Okay… Well if you need me, I’ll be in the conference room doing Bakugou’s job,” he laughs, tucking out of the door and closing it finally.

“He wishes he could do my job, fucker,” Bakugou grunts, mouth immediately returning to satiating your needy hole.

You sag into the chair, a quiet moan floating out of you as Bakugou continues to finger you, his lips slurping up your clit once more. Shooting a heated look at him, you bare your teeth at him, and choke out a hiss,” Fuck you!”

Bakugou only chuckles, savoring the way your cunt throbs around his digits. “I didn’t think you were so impatient, brat.” He doesn’t slow his actions though, knuckles ramming against your skin. He enjoys the way you gasp as he moves your thigh over his shoulder, his tidy fingernails pressing into your trembling leg. “You taste pretty good, Y/N. I guess it’s just your personality that’s bitter,” he remarks, smiling against your sex as his fingers slide out of you.

You toss him a pointed look as he wipes his chin with the back of his hand. “Excuse you, Boom-Boy,” you chide,” only my friends get to call me that!”

“Tch, I get to eat your pussy but I can’t call you by your name? You really know how to make a guy work for it,” he scoffs, sounding mock-hurt, and now menacing over you.

You frown in response but it quickly melts into a smirk. “Don’t worry, Katsuki,” you observe how he closes his eyes, the corner of his mouth twitching as his hand turns into a fist,” I’ll return the favor.” You tentatively place your hands on his belt, undoing the clasp and resting the heel of your palm against his clothed, hard cock. You gently undo the fastenings around his thick thighs, placing the belt with his grenades onto your desk cautiously. You weren’t trying to be blown up just for some dick.

He hooks his thumbs into the waistband of both his black pants and underwear, annoyed with you taking your sweet ass time. His bare cock springs free, greeting your hungry gaze with an inviting sheen of sticky precum trailing down his hard length. You gawk at the sight, genuinely surprised to find he was so… well equipped.

“So this is why you’re so cocky, huh?” you state, eyes following the protruding vein running the entirety of his full, flushed member.

He barks out a laugh which dies in his throat as you press a chaste kiss to his weeping pink tip. Your tongue flat against your bottom lip, you slide his cock into your mouth and moan at the salty, provocative taste of him. His length almost as thick as your throat itself, you gag gently as you take him whole into your mouth before quickly pulling back. You place your hand around the base of his now-slick cock, your mouth sucking and bobbing on the top half of him as you jerk your fist at the same tempo.

Bakugou is much louder than you expected him to be, and the way his erotic, serrated breath is tearing from his lungs makes your pussy clench in desire. His chest heaves, the bulging muscles on his torso tense underneath his surprisingly smooth skin. Your other hand wanders up his abs, enjoying the way the ridges between them are so defined. He growls as your finger rubs over his nipple, his hand catching your wrist in a tight grasp but not doing anything to stop the action.

You purr on his cock, slippery hand leaving the base to cup his balls, eliciting a hiss from him as he sucks air in between his gnashing teeth. Confidence torrenting through your veins at his reaction, your jaw drops as wide as you can muster, your mouth gliding further down his length.

Bakugou’s empty hand collects the hair falling around your face, holding it for you as you weave back and forth. His jaw falls slack as the head of his dick rubs the back of your throat, summoning a soft gag that makes your mouth vibrate around him. Your wrist hurts a little from his tight grasp, but the way his fingernails dig into your skin makes your core shiver in delight. “Shit, Y/N.”

You don’t bother to correct him this time, thumb running over his balls just hard enough to make him shake a bit, savoring the way he is panting and quaking before you. The hand grasping your hair nimbly shimmies closer to your skull, his fingers twisting almost too tightly onto the roots of your hair. You allow him to coax your mouth closer, his arm guiding your face to take his length deeply. A low growl tears from the bottom of his lungs as you lock eyes with his impassioned stare. His hips nudge smally against your lips, his tongue poking out to run over his lip as he pulls back and glides back inside your sweltering throat.

You moan forcefully, savoring the the strangled noise that slithers from his now gaping mouth. Taking initiative once more, you begin to jerk your neck back and forth quickly, wincing as his grip tightens on your wrist. Bakugou tries his best to repress his moans but the way your bratty throat welcomes his hard cock makes him see tiny, fizzling explosions when he closes his eyes.

His hips rear back, and you almost fall off the chair as you lean in to close the distance. He catches you easily, hot hands landing on your shoulders as his gaze locks with yours, inexplicable desire sizzling between the two of you. His hands fly down to collect your ass cheeks, and he picks you up just to place the apple of your cheeks on the desk behind him. Teetering on the edge of the wooden furniture, your legs wrap around his waist, and his lips slam onto yours again. His fingers frantically running over your super suit, he snarls in frustration when he can’t find the zipper.

You laugh at him mockingly, catching his eye as you pinch the zipper on the side of your neck, the material shrinking away immediately with elasticity. He watches as your breasts pop out of the silky, neoprene-like fabric, bouncing with hardened, pink nipples standing perkily to greet him.

“No bra?” He reprimands but his time sounds more turned on than accusatory. “Princess, you’re so naughty.” His hands fly to your tits, groping the soft and supple flesh with fervor. You unzip the rest of your side, pulling your arms out of the sleeves and carefully angling your hips so you can slide the suit off into a crumpled pile on the ground. In just your tiny little thong now, Bakugou closes the gap, pressing flush against your clothed center and grinding his wet cock against your damp underwear.

Your head tilts back and you whine, gasping as his mouth slides along your throat, hot tongue caressing the tender skin. “Please, Bakugou,” you wail, his thumbs rubbing your sensitive nipples hastily.

“God, you must be tight if you’re this high-strung,” he purrs next to your ear, enjoying the way your cunt clenches noticeably underneath your panties. Speaking of those… his fingers snatch the delicate lace to the side, his other hand grabbing his dick and running his swollen tip over your slit. He dips the head into your hole but recedes instantly, brushing it over your glistening trove before repeating the action. The teasing has your head spinning, harsh pants falling from you both and mingling in the thin divide between you. He can’t take it any longer, his hips snapping into yours as his dick easily disappears halfway into your steamy, aching cunt. “I fucking knew it,” he grunts, jaw clenching as your velvety walls embrace his girth, your cry of pleasure music to his ears. “Your cunt is so snug around my cock.”

His hips push into your thighs further, only stopping once he’s balls-deep, sunk completely in your flittering sex. Hand leaving your thong to the side of your cunt, he grabs your hip and pulls your ass close. You groan at his cock nestling even deeper into your sopping hole, and your hips jerk against his as his hand curls around your lower back, securing itself so his fingers coil snugly around your waist. You choke on a sob as he thrusts into you again, his thick member prodding you in a very private place.

“You better fuck me already,” you growl at his pace that was testing your nerves, ready to be fucked into submission. Not that you were going to go down without a fight.

He chuckles cockily, a sly grin on his lips. “Your wish is my command.” His hips slam against yours and your teeth sink into his shoulder, muffling a scream of desire. He ruts into you with ease, your arousal making it almost effortless for his cock to spread the tense walls of your desperate pussy. His free hand claps against the swell of your ass, the noise slicing through the air and you scowl at him. It’s like he wants to be caught.

Ragged breaths tumble from the both of you, your saliva trickling down his chest as your teeth are still fastened into his broad shoulder. “F-Fuck, Bakugou,” you keen, each time his pelvis pressing against you tightly forcing your vision to shake.

“Katsuki,” he huffs, his left hand pushing your chin up to capture your half-lidded gaze. “Say it, Princess— fuck, tell me who’s making you feel so good,” he demands, eager to hear his name leave your lips in such an intimate way once more. His hips change tempo from his fast and hard pace to a slower, more sensual rolling motion, milking the desired reaction out of you.

The novel movement pressing deliciously against your clit, your unabashed whimpers fall onto his eager ears.  Your fingers raise to pinch the top of his black eye mask, pushing the material up over his forehead so it tucks his ash blonde hair back. Looking into his eyes and admiring his uncovered, handsome features, you shoot him a sinful pout. “Ka— ah! Oh, Katsuki,” you gasp, your hands flying up to claw desperately at his muscular back.

Bakugou relishes in your lewd reply, eyes rolling back into his skull in delight. He lets out a gravely groan, increasing the tempo to a needy, impatient pace. The extra stimulation on your clit makes your legs shiver around him, your heels digging into the plush top of his ass. His hand slides back to grip around the back of your neck, leaning in to take the side of your ear between his teeth. His fingers on your throat press into your skin, his thumb pushed into your racing pulse. Hand squeezing just the right amount, it becomes pleasurably harder to breathe and you pant, tongue poking out as you wanton gaze meets his. “I’m gonna make you cum so hard Y/N,” he growls, almost snarling at you as your body bounces against his, watching your hair dance and shake around the erotic expression on your face.

“Eat shit,” your nose twitches in annoyance,” You’re gonna burst any minute now.” Your cheeks are dusted in a telling flush, your body feeling heat spread throughout. His hand tightens on your throat and you moan, loving the way your breath tears slightly.

“You’ve been clenched down on me this whole time,” he reasons, lips close enough so you can feel his ragged breath. “You can’t deny how your body reacts to me, even if you don’t want it to.”

You roll your eyes. Even buried between your legs at a time like this, he insists on pushing your buttons. “Oh, you want me to clench, Katsuki?” you inquire, tone confident in contrast to the wanton shake of your body. 

He shivers as his name leaves your sinful lips, and the breath in his lungs is sucked out of him as you clamp your pussy as tight as you can around him. His hips stutter and you revel in the lustful way his face contorts, his eyes screwing shut temporarily.

When his vermillion eyes open again, his predatory gaze adding wood to the fire between your legs. “Bad girl,” he admonishes, an unruly grin lifting the corners of his mouth. His hips slam against yours, railing into you at an unimaginable speed and harshness. “That’s a cute try, Princess, but you’re gonna cum before me no matter what.”

You can’t even respond as he thrusts into you, your pants ripping through the air and mingling with the quick slapping noise echoing through the room. You hate to let him win but you can’t hold yourself off from your impending orgasm, the pressure in your core multiplying at an alarming rate as each thrust deliciously stimulates your deepest, most secret place.

“Katsuki,” you whimper, your spine arching into his touch while his hand keeps its hold on your throat. “I’m so close, please,” you beg, your toes curling forcefully as your eyes roll back.

Bakugou smiles at your submissive tone, purring out, “That’s better.” His hand leaving your throat to rub his finger on your clit, your body trembles in his hands. He leans into you and his lips conquer yours passionately, tongue darting in between your lips to caress with yours. His tongue pulls back as he takes your bottom lip between his teeth, his wolfish stare daring you to follow his ensuing command. ���Cum for me, Y/N.”

Your body tenses as you reach your climax, but Bakugou continues to assault your g-spot mercilessly. Your arms shake in euphoria, nails pressing in to form desperate scratches on his skin. It feels like he is snapping you in two, and you absolutely love it. Tears prick the corner of your eyes as you wail out, relief washing over your limbs feeling like ice cold lemonade on a torrid summer day.

Pussy fluttering around his cock so deliciously, Bakugou moans at the new intensity. He swears as he keeps going, despite his own orgasm approaching. The image of you squirming in ecstasy underneath him makes him gasp immodestly. His hands clasp down on your hips roughly, making it even easier for him to pound into your soaked cunt as his teeth release your reddened lip. “Fuck, you’re so fucking tight,” he huffs, sweat glistening on his built chest as he thrusts into you particularly hard. “So much better than I could’ve ever imagined, holy shit, Princess.” He moans a little loudly, not holding anything back anymore. He is so fucking close.

“Katsuki, please,” you sob, your g-spot still being pummeled relentlessly, never getting a break from his assault and dragging your orgasm out longer than you thought possible. “I want your cum on me so bad!”

Bakugou throws his chin into the air, harsh breaths floating out as the flesh of your hips turns white under his oppressive grip. He grunts as he pulls out, his searing streaks of cum spurting out forcefully, shooting up to lace over your tits and down your stomach. His thighs tremble as he snarls, his first immediately jerking his cock as more of his cum gushes out of the tip. He gasps for breath, and he groans as your lips press to his captivatingly. He leans into your kiss, savoring the feeling of your sweet lips against his.

You shift in his hands, the once-rough palms now sliding over your skin carefully, fondling your body as his lips nibble at your own. You entertain it for a moment, nails trailing down his chest, thumbs rubbing into the ample muscles beneath his skin.

He pulls back, a lazy grin and satisfied eyes regarding you. “Well, that was hot,” he admits, eyebrow quirking upwards as he tries to even his choppy breath. You pull a handful of tissues out of the box on the corner of your desk, handing him a few which he gladly wipes over his drenched member. You sigh in content, head leaning back as you regulate your own breathing.

Bakugou makes you jump in surprise as he runs a new tissue along your torso, cleaning up his mess. You eye him playfully, secretly relishing in the way he is so considerate. He shuffles back a step like he can feel you appreciating his uncharacteristically caring actions, tugging up his underwear and tucking himself in with a smug grin on his lips.

“It was pretty good,” you say casually, sliding off the desk and pausing as your still-tingling core shifts, making you realize how tender you already are.

Bakugou rolls his eyes, handing you your costume from the floor. You snatch it out of his grasp condescendingly, glaring at him as you step into the leotard with quivering legs. “Pretty good?” he barks, eyeing your slow movements. “You’re still shaking, Princess.”

You shoot a glare at him, arms slipping into your costume and tucking your breasts away from his lingering eyes. “Fuck you.”

“You just did.” He replies smugly, and you ponder relieving the sudden urge you have to slap the look off his face.

“Whatever, Boom-Boy,” you quip, zipping up the side of your suit.

Bakugou chortles as he pulls on his shirt, fastening the loops around his thighs. “By the way,” he looks sideways at you with a smirk. “You came first, so I won.”

“You were, like, ten seconds behind me,” you scoff.

“After you, nonetheless,” he almost chirps, savoring in the irritation visibly building in you. He slips on his gloves, sliding his arms into his grenade-looking arm pieces. “Do I get a prize, Princess?”

You glance at his suggestive crimson eyes, pondering the idea of it. “You can choose the place next time,” you wink at him, clipping the belt on your waist with finality.

He seems pleased with the answer, his smirk widening as he steps closer to you. Your fingers pinch the bottom of his mask, dragging the material down to its correct location over his eyes. He shamelessly allows his gaze to rove over your body, recalling how tight and needy you’d been just minutes ago.

“Next time, I’m gonna make you beg,” he warns, opening the door and slipping through, seductive gaze locking with yours. “Can’t wait ‘til then, Y/H/N.”

And after that, working together became a whole lot easier.

   ─── ・°* ﾟ✧:* • ｡ﾟ:*･☽･*: ｡ﾟ•*:✧ ﾟ*°・ ───

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make sure to shoot me a comment/ask/reblog if you enjoyed ♥︎ I’d love to receive any feedback!!!

thank you so much for reading!! Happy Valentine’s Day sweethearts :)

➥ masterlist

𝐂𝐨𝐩𝐲𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 © 𝐒𝐡𝐨𝐮𝐭𝐨𝐠𝐞𝐩𝐢 𝟐𝟎𝟐𝟎. 𝐀𝐥𝐥 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭𝐬 𝐫𝐞𝐬𝐞𝐫𝐯𝐞𝐝.

[larstenobar]

Okay so I mentioned it in the tags but I kinda wanna talk about my experiences with So/uth Pa/rk. I say this as a cis, gay, non-Jewish man. I also say this as someone who used to actually engage with the forums on the main site. I also say this as someone who played. both the two major video game RPGs. So I am speaking not from reaction to other people’s reactions but from my own personal knowledge. This post is incredibly long so it’s under a read more. In it I provide what I believe are the actual effects of South Park on its viewership but I need to stress that I think it’s the wrong energy to blame parents for letting their children watch the show.

Don’t blame the parents, blame the show.

That show is genuinely horrible. I’ve seen a lot of people questioning how anyone could let children watch it - and to that I say you’re not adding anything to the conversation by shaming parents for letting their children watch that show. 

My own parents weren’t even out of their twenties when I watched the show, and many other parents grew up with the show as a non-issue. Young parents make mistakes.

At the time it came out and its early years only extremely vigilant parents realized how problematic the show was and the news was hard to spread without social media. At best you could inform your parent friends and hope they listened.

The show’s main characters are children, many parents found/find it hard to believe that a show with children as the main characters could be bad for those children. If the show were exactly the same but the children were college-aged then it would be another raunchy show they could easily see is not meant for their kids.

There’s a good portion of children who watched the show that weren’t actually allowed to watch it because their parents weren’t as tech savvy as them and therefore didn’t know about pirating/streaming until it was mainstream. We who grew up with YouTube knew you could put in [show] episode 1 part 1 and start watching. (this is gonna be another point later btw)

I know that it’s hard for you guys to even know all the reasons it’s problematic because you all barely scratch the surface of it’s problems. But before we even get into the meat of its problems (Science Denial, Homophobia, Transphobia, Ableism, Anti-Semitism, Islamophobia, etc.) we have to look at the very premise of the show.

The main characters begin in fourth grade. Fourth Grade. There’s a phenomena in our culture where we believe that children saying stupid stuff is harmless, and we forget that when children hear children speak - even animated children - they are hearing their peers. And peers learn from each other. This is why the show is so insidious, because it makes it easier for children to digest the messages.

Another thing that’s very important to note is that - while it’s labelled satire, every single joke is played straight, and the straight man character (usually either S or Ky) are ridiculed by the culture they’re surrounded in. Don’t believe me? Think I’m over-exaggerating? Think about the election episode, where they had to pick between a literal piece of shit or a douche. Our Straightmen were constantly saying how ridiculous the situation was, but everyone around them was telling them they were the ones who were stupid for not particpating in the election until they eventually break and submit to the absurdity. This is a light example, but it’s the typical formula. If they aren’t actively participating in the absurdity around them, they’re ridiculed until they break. What this tells the audience isn’t that the people who were particpating were stupid, but that they were right.

Now that we’ve looked at the show premise, let’s get into the details. A note: This is just what I remember from approximately age 5-18, the latter years I’d been turned off from it slowly so I wasn’t as engaged but it was not any better then. Since this is just what I can remember without looking through episodes or looking up articles, this is going to be a small sampling of things that stuck with me. Be assured, there was much, much, much more.

Science Denial and its effects on the viewers.

This is the lightest thing I can recall, and probably going to be the smallest section as it’s mostly centered around their stand-in for global warming, a cryptid figure called M/an/Be/ar/P/ig. Al G/ore was painted as a desperate, raving lunatic for believing in the phenomena, and was even implied to be making it up by having him dress up as the cryptid. I don’t have to explain why this is wrong, but we need to look at the effect this had.

On the one hand it made fans think that Global Warming (as it’s something A.G. believed in) was a hoax. Furthermore, it made them believe that anyone who believed in it was telling lies, which was overwhelmingly the most progressive people. A direct effect of these jokes (which they apologized for but never stopped propagating btw, MBP was still a joke when I stopped watching) was that progressives were seen as over-dramatic and stupid.

Now, I am not saying people watched these shows and immediately thought “oh wow, how fucking stupid of A.G. I don’t believe in climate change anymore.” It’s more like this: “Oh haha, S thinks A.G. is annoying, I like S so I agree, A.G. is annoying. You know, A.G. is kinda annoying with all that global warming, maybe there’s something to him being over-dramatic? Gosh why can’t these progressives see that it’s not that big of a deal. If they trust A.G. then they MUST be blowing other things out of proportion.” That’s the thought processes it trains its viewers to have.

LGBT+ Characters

Okay so there’s actually a lot of things that go into the Homophobia of S/P. And it goes back to the very beginning of the show, and is both explicit and implicit. There is a huge problem with these, but the main problem isn’t so much that they exist, but the show’s attitude towards their own ‘jokes’ and the ways in which fans suck up that thought process.

Before I get into this, there were some things that I need to say in favor of the show - not because I think the show deserve praise, but because there were some things that I latched onto and showed a surprising nuance. There’s like one thing, really but it is, of course, attached to something that’s a much larger issue within the show, so while it is a small glimmer, it’s in no way outshining any of the problems in the show.

For a while, the teacher underwent gender reassignment when he (the teacher currently identifies as male from my last interaction with the show) got breast implants and presumably bottom surgery (I vaguely remember a surgery but honestly that could be an invention) he was in a gay relationship. His then boyfriend had a very heartfelt and difficult conversation about how he still cared about him and how he’ll never hate him for being the woman that he wanted to be, but there was no way that he could pursue a relationship with him. I thought that this was a very mature depiction of a very difficult situation that is never really talked about. However, as I implied earlier, this is attached to a larger issue. Before any of you start having second thoughts about your ideas about S/P’s portrayal of gay and trans people, immediately after getting broken up with the teacher became violently homophobic as a backlash, I vaguely recall a group being formed.

Our main examples of LGBT individuals in the show are these big four (five?):

The afforementioned teacher

The teacher’s boyfriend, who wears leather gear at school and can’t stop talking kink even in front of the child characters

A character called B/ig G/ay A/l who is just as stereotypical as his name implies.

T/weak and C/raig, who are classmates of the focal characters. There’s a lot of reasons this is problematic, none of them being the age of those involved in the relationship - but the portrayal of them is hugely problematic.

Since I’ve already touched on the teacher, we’ll get into them first. When he was introduced, he was a sort of ambiguously gay character who was very bitchy and spoke with a slight lisp that eventually became a canon gay character with his relationship with the Kink Character. He was violently hateful towards his class, verbally abusing them all the time and often particpating in bullying children. Furthermore he’s seen as incompetent. This is problematic not because he’s a gay man doing this (though it’s not great either) but because this taught children that teachers don’t care about them and that they shouldn’t listen to them because they don’t know what they’re talking about anyways. This goes into their anti-intellectual stance mentioned earlier. It enforces the idea that education systems are useless, not because of the institutional problems they have with racism, but because of the incompetence of the system.

Going back to the point of this, still with the same character, let’s further explore the problems they had when the teacher had an arc as a trans woman. Honestly, I didn’t pay much attention to it, but the show made a point to let you know that the other characters were uncomfortable when Mr. G became Ms. G. The most damning thing about this, however, is the fact that Mr. G detransitioned bc he realized he wasn’t a straight woman, just a gay man. I think this is problematic because it frames transitioning as a sexual strategy. I don’t think I have to go into detail on why that’s problematic. And while this isn’t actually a tie into how horrible their handling of this character is, it should be noted that he’s the character that went on to be their T/rump stand-in.

The next character is the Kink Man.

God, the character’s personality isn’t actually all that bad. He’s loving and caring and empathetic and actually usually on the right side of topics, but. He doesn’t separate his kink from his personal life. He’s always strutting around in leather-daddy gear and has a lisp. His name is literally Mr. S/lave. There was an episode where he shoved a hamster in his ass. To viewers, he represents the dirty gays that keep shoving their sex-life down their throats - and this view is never, ever, ever subverted, so since the show never makes fun of people for having that view it reinforces that idea in their minds.

Honestly the least problematic character of the LGBT characters that I mentioned was BGA. He’s still a stereotype, yeah, he has a gay dog and is super flamboyant and constantly talks about how proud he is but honestly that’s not really all that bad. I can’t directly recall anything bad about him except that he’s incredibly flamboyant, speaks with a lisp, and loves to call things he owns “BGA’s Big Gay [noun].” Relatable. That doesn’t mean there was nothing problematic, it just doesn’t immediately come to me.

Now, for the next most problematic “representation” in the show. First, T&C showed no signs of actually being gay before. I do recall them both being my favorite characters before they became a couple, however. T is a coffee addict which has some suspect aspects we’ll get into later, and C used to flip everyone off. This was why they were my favorites. They became gay literally when fangirls started shipping them in the show. I’m sure there was an actual fandom movement, but their getting together was incredibly forced - that was part of the joke btw, that gay shipping is always forced. What’s horrible about this is that this was in an episode about ya/oi.

Now, let’s try to dissect this issue. First off, what this tells viewers is that being gay was not a natural part of who they were, but was an active choice (if you’re being kind) or something society forced on them (if you’re not.) The two were actively fighting with the narrative that they were gay and in a relationship. I think their actual agreement for being boyfriends was more of a mutual public display than an actual relationship, but it’s a fuzzy memory because that whole episode felt like a fever dream.

What’s worse about this, is that the show actually displayed ya/oi depictions of these children within the show. Nothing NSFW, but clearly sexually charged situations were definitely shown. At the time, they were 5th graders. 9/10 year olds for those not in the states. This emboldened actual CT shippers “If the show could do it, then so can I” was the general mentality on the forums I was on. So we can talk on pedophilia to reasons why this show is awful.

And those are just the named recurring characters. Another commonly recurring character is a prostitute with a deep voice who is very sloppy looking that, from my recollection, is implied to be a transwoman. This might have just been a conclusion I drew when I was young however - but even that is reason to be critical of the character, that such a conclusion could even be drawn means it might have played a factor in the character’s inception.

They also “Solved Overpopulation” with a gay orgy. I don’t have the language to define why this sat so wrong with me, but I remember being very deeply hurt by it. I think it has something to do with the idea that homosexuality is a choice and that it should only be accepted because of the potential benefits it has for population control.

Islamophobia and Racism

Okay so I’m just gonna come out the gate by saying that they fought hard to depict the prophet Mohammad. Like, hard. And they did it twice - one time went almost unnoticed but the second had a huge backlash from the Islamic people. For those who aren’t aware, it’s sacrilege to depict Mohammad. It’s like desecrating a church, maybe worse - I really have no frame of reference for how bad it’s viewed, but however bad it is, it still boils down to being a strict taboo that S/P broke not once, but twice.

Now, as I keep reminding, my memory gets hazy for many things, especially things I wasn’t aware of being insensitive early on. I have vague memories of terrorists being depicted in traditional Sikh garb, and similar instances of directly relating Islam with terrorism. I don’t recall the show ever making fun of anyone for relating Muslims with terrorism, for all those fans out there saying they make fun of everyone.

There was an episode where the characters wore blackface. There’s a black character literally named t/oken b/lack. Sure, that could be satire and maybe even be defended if they subverted the trope, however it should be noted he’s not the only black character in the show! There was an episode where there was a child adopted from Africa whose name escapes me - he was emaciated and devoured food at an alarming rate and generally was a nuisance if I remember correctly.

There was an instance where one of the main character’s father was on Wheel of Fortune. The category was people who annoy you. the letters on the board were ‘N_ggers.’ You know where this is going, the father said the N-word. The word was really naggers, but the rest of the episode was a sympathetic journey with him dealing with being ostracized. He became known as an ‘n-word guy’ which was treated as a worse term within the universe. I say this because a law was passed where the phrase was outlawed and they said you had to have a space of at least 5 words between ‘n-word’ and ‘guy’. Also, the n-word was said multiple times by a number of white characters. Now, I know the argument people make about this episode. They say that we were supposed to find the scanario ridiculous, but the issue I take with it is more that we’re led to feel sympathetic to racists who’ve had their lives ruined for being racist. That’s the issue with South Park’s brand of ‘satire’. It satirizes one issue, but doesn’t touch on the problematic things used to support that satire.

Almost every single Mexican character is a stereotype of some sort. Either a laborer who can barely speak English, a gangbanger, or some other stereotype. There was an episode where they had C’s hand become a famous Latina popstar by singing about Mexican Food themed songs, like the actual songs ‘T/aco F/lavored K/isses’ and ‘T/aco B/urrito’. The hand’s name was Jennifer Lopez, I don’t know of these songs are direct parodies bc I’ve only heard Jenny From the Block.

And while S/P tends to stay away from very direct anti-black jokes, they don’t shy away from other races. There’s an asian character whose business is called ‘c/ity wok’, but he always pronounces it ‘shitty’ because the joke here is ‘oh haha asians have funny accents’ and literally nothing else. I honestly believe that asians receive the WORST treatment on S/P when it comes to facing racism, but I’m not qualified to make that claim. Other examples of anti-asian racism: There was an pokemon episode where they said that Japan was using anime to indoctrinate youth, they literally had the kids operate fighter jets to make an attack on the U.S. What’s worse about this, is that whenever the Japanese execs were questioned about this, every time, they dropped their pants to show how small their penises were and how they should be pitied for it. Another instance, I very strongly remember a depiction of asian characters as being lemon yellow with eyes like this: \ /. There was an episode where they had Asians violently murder whales with glee. They lean into anti-asian racism so much harder than any other form of racism - the only thing they’re worse about is their antisemitism, which will get its own section later.

Antisemitism

God there’s so much. Jew Gold, nazi imagery, the entirety of c/a/r/t/m/a/n as a character and there are so many posts on this website by people much more qualified than me to delve into what exactly is wrong with this and the depictions of it, so I’m mostly just going to catalog what comes to mind and then speak about the actual factual instances of S/P inspired antisemitism I’ve witnessed and been party to.

There was an episode devoted to Jewish people having a secret bit of gold around their necks. This was proven true in the universe when Ky gave up his ‘J*w Gold’ to C.

Ky’s mom is such an overbearing harpy who bulldozes over everyone, this was later explained as her having Jersey-Blood (yes this was a Jersey Shore joke) but before that it was completely because she was a proud Jewish woman.

Ky’s father is depicted as weak-willed and piddling. He always wears a yarmulke no matter the situation.

Ky is often depicted as being whiny and non-commital

OF ALL THE CHARACTERS, KY IS THE ONE WHO IS DEPICTED AS A HYPOCRITE THE MOST

Ky’s cousin with the same name is depicted as in poor health, complains about everything, whines about things not being fair bc they don’t go his way, and has caricatured Jewish features

As mentioned above, there are hosts of Nazi imagery associated with C

C has said every Jewish slur I have ever heard. In fact he introduced me to the concept of antisemitism

Ky, in a Christmas episode, is depicted as wishing he could celebrate Christmas and Hanukkah is depicted as a sort of consolation prize that’s Not As Good.

Ky’s father was an internet troll, and the trolls were. literal trolls. with certain features that are not great.

The following image is the Prophet Moses:

And there’s more and more and more. I will not accept anyone saying that this is just jokes because I know firsthand how insidious their treatment of Jewish people is because this show literally made me think it was okay to engage in Antisemitism. I made greedy jokes, like saying a got J**ed when i was screwed over, or that someone who was being greedy was being a J*w. I am not proud of this, and I think I grew out of it relatively quickly as I dropped that language in middle school.

But not everyone did. Even some of my closest friends were still saying they got J**ed when we were graduating high school. There were no Jewish people at my school, so there was no humanizing face for the Jewish people for us. Thank god for the Nanny or who knows what kind of person I’d be now. There were people even worse than me, I should mention. There was one person in my school who literally used J*w as a stand-in for loser because of this show. This show was the only interaction with the Jewish faith that most of my classmates ever had, and the same is true of many rural towns in America who have only Protestant populations.

Fatphobia

All the most unlikeable characters are fat. C. Ky’s mom. The gun-toting republican. And there are other specific episodes where they equate fatness to not being healthy. In their episode partnered with WoW (don’t forget that happened, y’all) the main antagonist was depicted as a no-life having loser and he was, surprise, fat. This show draws a very direct line between being fat and being unlikeable.

Sexism

God, the portrayal of women is so horrible, literally my only entry here is going to be one single link:

Note all the other isms depicted in this btw.

Substance Abuse

The prostitute mentioned in the LGBT section would wander into scenes screaming about how she wanted crack. There was an episode where they created a league of basketball players who were comprised entirely of ‘crack babies.’ I’m being generous by not putting that in the racism section because most of the babies were BIPOC which says something about the kind of people that M/att and T/rey think are addicts.

The character T/owelie is supposed to show an addict, but his addiction is literally just weed which means they’re claiming weed is addictive.

I can’t even begin to describe the show’s relationship to alcohol. As a child of an alcoholic, I can say that it’s not fucking cute that they made S’s dad a violent drunk. It’s genuinely scary to see your parent fly into a rage because of their alcoholism and them reducing it to a joke was, I think, one of the points where the ‘it’s just a joke’ mentality started to break for me personally. 

While we’re on the subject of parents, C’s mom was literally a crack addict who was also a full service sex worker. The correlation is not sympathetic in the slightest. And even worse was Ke’s parents. They were depicted as abusive, neglectful, drug-addicted rednecks. This was sometimes played to make you sympathize with Ke, and it worked because even now I can hardly think of how Ke himself was problematic rather than the situations he was in. (He’s the one who gets gruesomely murdered every episode) I don’t know if this is because of selective memory, if he was genuinely just the least problematic in the show, or if I’m waxing nostalgic for the show. Regardless, as I said, his situation was mostly played for sympathy. However, it was also played for jokes almost as often.

Pedophilia

The children are put in sexual situations a nonzero amount of times, they make priest molestation jokes, and they made jokes about MJ.

Slurs

Yeah they said them a lot. There was the aforementioned N-Word Guy episode, but there was also an episode that thinly mirrored immigrants coming to America for work and the people (time-travelers) were called ‘Goobacks’. I think the word ch*nk was used a nonzero amount of times, C used every slur for Jewish people in the book. None of these were censored by the show, any censoring was done by networks.

Why make this post?

Because I know people know this show is garbage, but I think it’s important that people know why it’s garbage with specific and nonspecific instances of why the show was problematic.

[crystaljins]

Schemes and tricks to win her heart | 03

Characters: Taehyung x Reader  Jin x OC

Word count: 3956

Synopsis: Rich company heir Kim Seokjin has a plan to win the heart of the girl of his dreams, and you, his little brother’s best friend, are dragged along for the ride. His younger brother objects, of course. Bestfriend!Taehyung and Chaebol!Jin

Notes: This part was probably the most fun to write. I tried to be funny, and hopefully I succeeded but even if I didn’t at least I enjoyed myself. That’s the important thing, right?

1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5

In which Jin never does things by halves.

The next morning you receive an odd text from Jin while making breakfast. It says “Good luck.” That’s it- no context, nothing else. Confused, you ponder over its meaning for a moment- could he have gotten your exam dates mixed up? Did he send a text to the wrong person?

Luckily, you are not kept in suspense for long because almost as soon as you receive the text, you hear an urgent knocking on your door. Sighing, you set down your toast and walk across your apartment. It is probably your neighbour with another noise complaint- Jungkook and Taehyung had been over late last night, making a lot of noise while engaged in a board game with your roommate. It might even be your roommate who had left earlier without her phone. Regardless, you answer the door completely unsuspecting in your teddy bear pyjamas and with your bed head.

Jimin and his fiancée stand on the other side, grinning brightly, and it takes you a few seconds to recognise the looks in their eyes and comprehend what the numerous duffle bags set at their feet are for. The second you do, you panic, your eyes flying wide as you try to slam the door shut.

“No.” You say quickly. “No way!”

Jimin prides himself on his quick reactions, however, and shoves his foot between the door and the frame before you can lock them out. Suddenly Jin’s cryptic message becomes clear. Jimin gives you an ominously bright smile, his foot still wedged in the door, and you’re not proud of your next actions since you always pride yourself on your maturity, but you begin to kick repeatedly at Jimin’s shoe like the child you really are.

“Stay out! You’re not welcome here! You and her both- I know what’s in those bags!” You declare, as Jimin and his fiancée begin to push against your door with all their body weight.

“We can do this the easy way, (Y/N),” Jimin exclaims, his voice strained as he leans against the door with all his might. “Or I can call Jungkook and have him hold you down!”

At the mention of Jungkook, you pale and are distracted enough that Jimin and Chaeyoung gain the upper hand and the door to your apartment is thrown open, and you along with it.

You try not to lose any time though, and you are on your feet and racing across your apartment before they can get to you.

“No makeovers!” You cry. “This isn’t a drama- I’ve told him how I feel about his stupid rich man makeovers!”

Jimin stands on the opposite side of the coffee table from you, his hands held up pacifyingly while Chaeyoung makes herself comfortable, dragging in the duffle bags and producing clothes and makeup and skin products from their depths.

“Now, now, (Y/N),” Jimin begins, his voice airily calm in that annoying way he uses to peace-keep arguments. “It’s not a makeover! It’s a gift! How many girls can say they’ve had one of the richest people in Korea pay for their wardrobe?”

“A lot! Taehyung gets around!” You cry, grabbing the open textbook on your coffee table and wielding it before you like a shield. Chaeyoung, meanwhile, has waltzed into your bedroom and comes back out with an armful of clothes. “What does Jin have over you that he put you up to this? I’ll double it!” You exclaim desperately. Jimin shakes his head.

“Just the knowledge that there will be one less fashion disaster in the world and he’ll finally get his happily ever after with Sooyoung. And an all-expenses paid cruise for our honeymoon.” He informs you, and your heart sinks- you’d hoped it was like a $20 or something that you could actually afford but you should have known better when you’re dealing with super rich company heirs.

“Jimin, babe, I think we’re gonna need more garbage bags, it’s in a lot worse state than I originally thought.” She calls, dumping another armful of your clothes in your hallway. You stare in anguish at your wrinkled clothes, and the distraction is all Jimin needs to leap across the table and wrestle you into a headlock.

“I got her Chaeyoung!” He calls. “And we didn’t even have to call Jungkook! Now, you can keep struggling, (Y/N), or I can call Jungkook to sit on you, but we know either way I’m going to get my way.”

++

Taehyung finds you decked out in a bathrobe, with a face mask half-peeling off your face. You stand on the back of your couch brandishing a pair of metal tongs before you like a sword while Jimin, similarly attired although his face mask is more adherent than yours, dodges your frantic swipes. He waves what Taehyung thinks may be a dress frantically at you like a white surrender flag.

Beside the chaos, Chaeyoung is also sporting the bathrobe/facemask combination, but she is significantly more calm, flipping through one of your textbooks while you and Jimin duke it out.

She glances up as Taehyung deposits the bags of snacks he was carrying onto the kitchen countertop.

“They’ve been like that for like, ten minutes,” She informs him. “I think they’re at a stalemate.”

Jimin makes a dive for you with the dress.

“It’s cute!” He yells, while you dodge his dive, still waving the tongs around like a madman.

“It’s slutty!” Is your answering screech, and Taehyung, not for the first time that week, promises to murder his brother. Painfully. Sighing, his digs his fingers into the bridge of his nose.

“Have you been like this all morning?” He questions, and Chaeyoung nods, flipping another page of your textbook. Taehyung doubts she’s actually reading it because they’re bone dry and boring as and he’s really not sure how you spend as much time studying as you do.

“Most of the morning, at least. There was a little interlude where she let us put a facemask on, but when I pulled out the dress she jumped onto the back of the couch with the tongs and hasn’t come down since.” She explains. She flicks another page idly, like she is thumbing through a magazine.

“What are you even trying to do?” Taehyung asks, and Chaeyoung shrugs.

“Well, Jin called in a favour in exchange for paying for our honeymoon, and said he wanted us to give (Y/N) a makeover.” Chaeyoung says, giving another distasteful glance at how Jimin grabs for the tongs and you whack him with them. “I believe his exact words were ‘Make her look hot but bitchy’.”

“And why aren’t you helping?” Taehyung asks.

“I’m the brains- Jimin’s the brawns. I make her pretty but he does all the manhandling. That’s how we roll.” She answers. Taehyung gives her an incredulous look.

“How often do you force makeovers on people that you have a system?” He asks, horrified, and she merely smiles mysteriously.

“Often enough. Anyway, if you’re here, please make yourself useful and hold her down or something, she has a ‘date’ tonight and I haven’t even started waxing!” Chaeyoung says. Taehyung stiffens, feeling for some reason like a stone has dropped into his stomach. The thought that you are going on a date is horrifying enough on its own, but just the fact that it is his brother that has him in this situation… grimly, Taehyung yet again promises himself that Jin is going to pay for this.

In the meantime, however, you have agreed to this, and Jin is pretty desperate, so he supposes that as your best friend and Jin’s only brother, it is his job to ensure you do the best you can do. With a sigh, he rolls up his sleeves in preparation.

“The things I do for you guys.”

++

It takes a lot of fighting and struggle, but once Taehyung joins the fight, you really don’t stand much chance. He holds down your arms while Jimin sits on your legs, scrolling through his phone with a bored expression on his face. You have pretty much had the fight drained out of you, and so you settle for glaring at Taehyung with defiant eyes while Jimin’s fiancé turns from whatever she had been preparing on your kitchen counter. Taehyung winces when he sees her brandish a stick dripping in hot wax before her. He even considers letting you go, but then they would have wasted all that time subduing you for nothing.

“Now hold still,” Chaeyoung says with a half-smile. “Or I can’t guarantee the safety of your eyebrows.”

You go eerily still after that- you must truly love your eyebrows to put up with the treatment that follows. Taehyung watches with a morbid kind of fascination, and you silently plead with eyes so pathetic he would have caved at multiple times were it not for the look Jimin gives him. Jimin is as sweet as honey, but boy can he give death glares.

“Please take better care of yourself.” Chaeyoung pleads as you pat moisturiser onto your skin, looking violated. “You have such a nice face, if you’d just put some effort in!”

Oddly, you flick a glance to Taehyung, before dropping your gaze. You mutter something under your breath. He doesn’t catch what you say, because the next thing he knows, Chaeyoung is shooing both him and Jimin out of the room, declaring that she wants your final look to be a surprise.

Taehyung spends the next little while engaged in a boardgame marathon with Jimin- your roommate eventually comes home and joins in, along with her boyfriend, determined to get her revenge for losing so brutally the night before. He has forgotten his initial intention in coming over, and he is so focussed on winning the current game of codenames that he is wholly unprepared for when you step out, hair and makeup done and wearing the dress Jimin had been waving at you earlier like a lunatic.

Oh. All the air wooshes from his chest at once and he drops the card he was holding. Is he paralysed? Why can’t he move? Why can’t he breathe?

The dress on its own it stunning- white and form-fitting and off the shoulder, but coupled with the way your hair is carefully curled and falls gently around your face instead of piled haphazardly on the top of your head to hide the fact that you haven’t washed it like it usually is, and how your face is carefully done up to accentuate the shape of your eyes and your long lashes, overall the look is devastating.

Beside him, Jimin lets out a low whistle and Taehyung silently agrees, and probably would have mimicked the sound were his lungs not stubbornly refusing to expand.

“Wow,” Your roommate exclaims. “What’s the occasion, (Y/N)?”

“A date.” Is your awkward, clipped response as you lean forward to slip on heels that are so high, Taehyung fears you may break your ankle. Then your words register and he feels an odd, near painful sensation right where his stomach sits, like indigestion only sharper and worse.

A date. You have a date. With his brother. Yes, it is a fake date, carefully orchestrated so that the two of you will run into Sooyoung on the way home from a dinner with colleagues that Jin was actually invited to but blew off for the sake of his idiotic plan. But he’s watched enough romcoms to know how this plays out- a makeover, a romantic setting, two people out together and suddenly seeing each other in a new light… He feels sick. Like he may throw up. This is bad for his health. What’s wrong with him? Why does he feel like this?

His phone buzzes, lighting up with a notification, and he glances down at it. Suddenly he experiences a sinking sensation- he had forgotten he had agreed to a third date with a girl in one of his classes, one that, up until that actual moment, he had actually been looking forward to. Yet all of a sudden, with the knowledge that you’re going to be sitting out in a nice restaurant with Jin instead of marathoning Netflix in the background while you scan through that absurdly thick textbook of yours like you usually do when he has a date, the prospect of a date doesn’t seem that exciting. He’s not sure why- he just knows that it is.

“Is it too late for me to read out that essay of why you shouldn’t do this?” Taehyung says slowly, resisting the urge to press his palm into his chest and make sure his heart is still functioning as normal. You shoot him a look. One that had sent many a lesser person scrambling away, the one you had perfected over the years to let people know you thought they were beneath you and one that was rarely directed at him and frequently directed at his brother.

“I shredded it.” You say simply. Taehyung’s jaw drops in offence- he had spent time on that! He had even gone into uni just to deliver it to you (and have a makeshift coffee date with aforementioned girl from class but that’s beside the point)! Before he can protest, however, you are all interrupted by a ring on your doorbell. You all turn towards it, and then all eyes on the room turn expectantly towards you. You blink, unaccustomed to the sudden attention, before groaning.

“I’ll get it.” You announce.

++

Flowers. He brought you flowers. You blink stupidly at the no-doubt absurdly expensive bouquet of roses before you lift your gaze to Jin. He is dressed to the nines, looking proud of himself, but as he registers your expression, his face falls.

“Are they too much?” He questions. You look at him with a frown, but the more pathetic he looks the more you find yourself caving to the urge to be just a little nicer.

“A little.” You finally say. “We aren’t actually dating, and it’s not like Sooyoung’s going to see these, so…” You trail away. Jin brightens.

“Ah, but it’s the thought that counts! Besides, these also double as a thank you for giving up your evening for me.” He explains. “I know my idea is stupid, but I really am desperate, and I’m so thankful that you’re doing this for me.”

Embarrassed at the sincerity in his voice, you merely duck your head.

“It’s not a big deal. I’ll just pop these in a vase and we can get going.” You say. You pause. “But I thought dinner was meant to be the thank you? Does this mean we aren’t actually eating?” You question. Jin shakes his head with a laugh.

“No, don’t be silly, dear future sister-in-law. When you’re as rich as I am, you don’t need to be stingy with your gratitude.” Jin says. You glare at him, telling him exactly what you think of him flaunting his wealth, before ducking away to put your roses in a vase, ignoring the curious eyes that watch you.

Dinner is a pleasant enough affair, though Jin is understandably nervous and subdued. He really spares no expense, and the restaurant is definitely the nicest you’ve been to in your short life. You remember when you were in school, how jealous you had been that your friends got to go to restaurants like this on the regular while you were the only attendee in the school who had to work a part-time job and maintain your scholarship. High school you would be jumping in glee right now, and so you indulge her and enjoy the expensive meal without guilt.

Finally, the long-awaited moment arrives- Jin checks his clock and informs you that Sooyoung had been planning to head home around this time. He grabs his coat and helps you into yours, before offering his arm for support. You are grateful for it because while you can most certainly handle the heels you are wearing, you still feel a touch unsteady.

Jin texts his driver to come pick you up as you wonder down the street, vaguely in the direction of the restaurant you had been invited to. You glance around- you have never actually met Sooyoung, and so will be clueless if she walks past you.

“Thanks for dinner.” You say as you walk. He shakes his head.

“It was nothing! Taehyung told me you always wanted to go there and it’s close by where we had to be.” He informs you. He has calmed down a lot as you stroll along, and even begins whistling cheerfully as he leads you in an aimless wander. You wish you could say the same, but your nerves pick up, particularly with the mention of Taehyung adding an inescapable weight to the light-hearted conversation you tried to keep up.

Just when you are beginning to think that maybe Jin messed up, you hear a tentative voice behind you.

“Seokjin?” Her voice is gentle, and to your surprise, laced with hurt. Jin stiffens, and you see him take a deep, calming breath, before he faces her, an awkward smile on his face.

“Sooyoung?” He answers. His smile is horrifically fake and fabricated, and you feel mildly uncomfortable. You also feel not yourself- like the skin you’re wearing isn’t yours. It’s an odd, out of body experience like you’re watching the scene unfold as a spectator. “What a coincidence! What are you doing here?”

She doesn’t respond, her gaze instead flickering hesitantly to you. Jin smiles and tightens his grip on your arm.

“This is (Y/N), my date, I might have mentioned her- I’ve known her since highschool.” He says as an explanation. You do not say anything, still gripped by the strange sensation that you are a spectator in this conversation and not a participant.

You don’t know what expression you expected Sooyoung to have when the deception finally occurred. You didn’t have a face to picture in the first place, but you had imagined maybe you would see relief, or confusion, or curiosity. From the way Jin made it sound, Sooyoung had been completely uninterested in him and probably hoping he would meet some other girl and move on. If you were in her shoes, you probably would have wanted Jin to leave you alone.

Which is why the heartbroken expression on her face completely throws you. You know the look- you wear it well, and heartbreak is written in every line on her face, in the stiffness of her posture, in the unshed tears that glimmer in her eyes.

She turns tail and flees without a word.

For a moment, there is silence, awkwardness. You doubt Jin had thought through how this would actually play out, so you are unsurprised that he is gobsmacked. He flinches, as if to run after her, but then remembers he is holding your hand. He releases, glancing down at his hand as if it doesn’t belong to him. Then determination fills his eyes.

“(Y/N), the driver’s on his way if you just wait here. I’m so sorry, but I have to go after her.”

And just like that, Jin is sprinting away, leaving you standing on the pavement alone, like an idiot.

You just watch him go.

++

When the driver finally pulls up, you are not expecting to see Taehyung sitting inside as well. He too, looks surprised, as he scans the area around you.

“Where’s Jin?” He asks, clearly confused. You shrug, trying to conceal you surprise at his presence.

“He ran off after Sooyoung. Guess the fake-date did its job.” You slide in beside him, and miss the sharp intake of breath as his gaze once more takes in your carefully made up appearance. He shakes himself out of it quickly, and ponders your words.

“You mean he just left you on the side of the road?” He questions incredulously. You nod, tucking your jacket more tightly around you body and fixing your attention on a ladder that has appeared on your stockings. Better that then focus on how close Taehyung is, and how you can smell him at this proximity, and if you turned your head just the slightest bit you’d be gazing straight into his warm brown eyes.

“Yeah. I mean I don’t think either of us planned what would happen after we ran into Sooyoung, but hey, it could be worse. He could have made me catch a bus in these heels.” You say. A muscle in Taehyung’s jaw tightens as he grits his teeth in annoyance.

“He could have at least waited.” He says sourly. You shrug, unaffected. Taehyung whirls on you, then. “Are you ok?” He demands. You blink, confused.

“Yeah? I’m fine.” Is your response. He scans your face and you pray that the meagre lighting of the car conceals the way heat rises to your cheeks under his gaze. “Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Aren’t you disappointed?” Taehyung questions. “That he chose Sooyoung over you?”

“Not really.” You say with a yawn, suddenly registering how exhausted you are. “That was kind of the point, wasn’t it?”

“But like… are you sure a part of you wasn’t hoping that that wouldn’t happen? That maybe he would fall for you with all these fake-dating shenanigans?” Taehyung presses. You shoot him an odd look, puzzled.

“No. Why would you even think that- have you been joining in on his romcom sprees again?” You demand, irritated. Honestly, you were going to burn your collection, it had caused you too much trouble this week. Taehyung shakes his head, and chews his lip pensively.

“So… you don’t feel anything for my brother at all? Not even a little bit?” He says. You snort, and shake your head.

“I do feel something for him.” You say. Taehyung’s eyes flash with panic. “Relief when he leaves the room.” You snort at your little joke, but Taehyung doesn’t look amused.

Annoyed, you change the subject.

“What about you? How are things going with your lady love?” You say, trying to feign nonchalance when really you are burning with curiosity. Taehyung sighs and slumps back against the car seat.

“Awful. I got dumped- again.” He admits. He turns his head so that he is staring at you out of one eye, his cheek pressed against the sleek leather car seat. “I have such rotten luck when it comes to my love life. I really liked her too- that was our third date. That’s why I’m here- I texted our driver to pick me up on the way to get you guys since it was on the way.”

You try really hard to hide your delight at the revelation that Taehyung was dumped, you really do, but you cannot keep the elation from your voice.

“It’s ok- you can join the spinsters’ club with me.” You offer. Taehyung snorts.

“Try not to sound so thrilled to see me knocked down a few pegs.” He responds. He pauses then, carefully deliberating his next words. “Can I ask you something?”

“Shoot.” You say, turning your attention to the window because his gaze is too heavy and overwhelming.

“Why did you agree to Jin’s plan?” He asks. You stiffen. He can see you’re going to refuse to answer, so he presses a little further. “Please. I have to know.”

You sigh, resigned, knowing you can never refuse him anyway.

“I sympathised with him. I knew how desperate he felt.” You say, turning your gaze back to Taehyung. He watches you almost sleepily.

“So it’s not because you like him?” He asks. You shake your head.

“Of course not.”

[placesthatchangedpeople]

A former resident about Eating Recovery Center

Hi! I'm new here. I've procrastinated for ages wrt joining reddit because I generally don't like it very much, but some communities speak to me. This is one of them.

The place I was sent to wasn't as bad as some of what I see here, I think because it was (purportedly) single-issue, rather than "treating" all kinds of teen trouble. They were hand in hand with wilderness camps and boarding schools, though. Their marketing directors - the people who gussy up the website and advertise their 97% parent satisfaction rate - were trained by, and have past experience at, CRC Health. They run Aspen education programs, and a whole bunch of other ones. They regularly sent kids off to wilderness camps or schools after they finished with ERC. It was like the "next step".

The place that I was was called Eating Recovery Center (ERC) and it's located in Denver, CO, although they have off-shoot locations in Texas, California, and more. They do have an adult treatment center as well, but I believe it is less abusive.

The child and adolescent inpatient and residential facility is awful, but incredibly popular. They've spread to something like ten states, luring families in with their garbage website. The whole thing is written like "Parents, you're so stressed, and it's because your child is a Gigantic Problem. We know how hard it is to have horrible kids. Please, send them to us, and we'll rehabilitate them while you get to relax and connect with the fun parts of life, which you haven't been able to do with your lil problem child over here." It's marketing genius. Whenever a kid says "hey, this is abusive", not only do they say that the kid is a dirty liar who just wants to leave, they actually say that this is proof that it's working. Like, "Your child has been taken prisoner by their Evil Disorder. As we cure your child from the Disorder, the Disorder gets scared and lashes out. Your true child is waiting underneath, and they're very excited to be healing. The more that your child fights our program, the closer to recovery they are. Claiming that we are abusive is, in fact, a sign of recovery." That's a summary, but you get the gist. It's like a god damned exorcism.

I was a patient there in 2013, in September. I wasn't there for long, because I made a fuss about their abuse, and I was 18 and they knew they couldn't fully shut me up, so they transferred me to a lower level of care. They did, however, convince my parents (who, to their credit, were just desperate and didn't want me to die; they've since acknowledged that they fucked up) that if I signed myself out of treatment, I should not be allowed home, and should be left to live on the street. The idea, I think, was that this would "shock" me into getting better. Yet they (the RTC staff) also told me that they didn't care if I was any better when I left so long as I followed their rules in the meantime. But, details. So.

They were emotionally and psychologically abusive, as well as neglectful and I'd say perhaps physically. Psychiatrically, too. The shittiest thing they did, in my opinion, was lock my twelve year old friend in isolation for 14 hours as punishment for exercising (I do not know how much she'd been exercising, but since this place considers standing up from a seated position to be 'excessive movement', it was probably nothing - standing up without permission was considered an infraction). She wasn't allowed so much as access to a bathroom, and wound up defecating on herself. Staff didn't see this as a problem. They told her it was her fault, and that she needed to make better choices.

The threat of isolation as a punishment for ignoring behavior warnings (three "redirections" and you're punished) was always there, and this room was called the "quiet room", if I remember correctly. During my stay there, there was one patient who was eleven years old and had some sort of developmental disability, and they kept him in isolation for what I think was days. I remember that he regularly wound up in there and that we could often hear him crying and screaming. How therapeutic /s

Patients were given NG (nasal gastric) tubes if they refused a meal. I had an NG tube put in, which didn't bother me very much, but it made my nose run like no other and made it really hard to swallow solid food. It wouldn't stop dripping during nighttime snack, but we weren't allowed Kleenex or napkins. I asked a staff member for a napkin due to literally not being able to stop the deluge of snot from my nostrils, right, and she kept refusing and said she wouldn't help me until I finished my snack. I kept asking and eventually, she gave me a really bitchy look and threw the napkins at my face. This isn't particularly abusive, I think, because napkins don't hurt, but that's just not the kind of behavior that should be shown by somebody working in a treatment facility. The staff would regularly scream at kids who didn't finish snacks or meals.

I, along with several of the kids, regularly didn't finish meals. And by regularly, I mean over the course of my first day or two, so not much of a precident, imo. This issue was brought up after dinner, when the group gathered for a post-meal check-in. Patients were encouraged to name the patients who were not finishing meals, explain how said patient was bothersome to them, and then the staff would shame the patients who were named, and ask the other patients to help come up with an appropriate "response" (punishment). The staff decided that we should be made to sit at a separate table, in a separate room, during meal times, and not be permitted to speak to each other, nor communicate in any other way. If we made prolonged eye contact or started giggling, we were reprimanded. Talking at meal times was one of the ways that patients coped with having to eat large meals, and it kept morale up, and they took it away as a punishment. It certainly doesn't make anyone eat better. When we had downtime, we were closely monitored so that we never discussed our grievances re: the program, with each other. We managed to anyway, by whispering and speaking as quickly as possible, by writing notes which we then had to dispose of (since they went through all of our belongings and journals, and withheld these things whenever they arbitrarily deemed them inappropriate - my journal was confiscated because I wasn't displaying the proper mindset). But staff were always looming, and it was stressful.

I don't remember exactly, but I'm pretty sure that I wasn't allowed contact with my parents for the first three days of my stay. I could be conflating it with some other hospital or center, but I don't think so. All parents of patients were encouraged to stay in the Denver area for as long as possible, and my parents rented a condo (while also forking out some $30,000 per month) and came in for family therapy a couple of times a week. Family therapy consisted of my "therapist" (she was licensed, but I've no clue how) encouraging my parents to complain about me, and when I said that I didn't like something my parents had done, she just said, "well, I don't think they're doing that. That's not what I see at all. Maybe you should change your behavior/perception/etc." She gave me these ridiculous assignments a few times each week, and I never completed them, because they were stupid and I was on Mission: Get Myself Kicked Out of Here, but I found the way she handled this to be a red flag. She was /so/ disappointed that I hadn't done the assignments, and looked at me all sad, and said "[name], that hurts me. It hurts me when you ignore these things that I've worked so hard on for you. I want to help you. This is hurtful, can you see that?" The fact that she was so manipulative without a single qualm really worries me, because the majority of the patients were younger and less defiant than I was, and bought into all of the brainwashing and manipulation that these people touted.

The majority of them came from abusive homes, but the RTC's whole philosophy is that mental illness treatment has been centered on parental flaws for too long, that parents are perfect, and that kids are bitchy little problems for no good reason. This is a tempting philosophy both for parents like mine who aren't abusive and don't want to be told that they are, and for abusive parents who want to be validated and excused.

Everyone there was deprived of sleep (I used to fall asleep on the concrete floors), water (only one cup with meals), and the right to use the bathroom when we needed to. Staff actually bragged about having had patients pee on the floor before, like this was some kind of accomplishment, not letting children pee.

The psychiatrists would keep children on medications that the children complained about, things that didn't help, and I was personally fine with my meds but I had friends who were being kept on awful medications. They eventually just started doing that thing where they move the pills to that little pocket between their teeth and cheek, swallow the water, pass the "swallowed pills" check, and then spit them out.

Somehow, at one point, the staff got it into their heads that I wasn't changing my underwear every day. I have no clue how this happened, but they implemented a policy where I had to show them my clothes each day so that they could "make sure" I was changing all of them. Like, what? That doesn't even make sense to me, because wtf, but it was just really degrading. This might be slightly TMI, but when I was on my period (and I have endometriosis, so it's really heavy and makes me nearly pass out/vomit when I'm not on 'round the clock birth control), they still wouldn't let me use the bathroom except on Their Schedule. I had to beg to be allowed to use it, and they got so mad at me. Like, sorry? I can't actually do anything about this?? That was really degrading too. As if I wanted to tell a whole bunch of hostile, abusive near-strangers that I'd bled through my clothes again, damn.

I don't remember ever having a phone call. I saw my parents on weekends for an hour, but there wasn't much communication. When they kicked me out of residential and put me in partial hospitalization (a ten-hour-a-day every day outpatient program in a nearby building, also run by them - it was a "step down" thing), they told my parents to never let me have my cell phone for longer than thirty minutes, and to watch me (and its screen) the entire time I had it. To go through all of my electronics and journals to make sure I was Doing It Right. They told my parents that withholding everything I enjoy until I recovered was completely reasonable, and that it was okay (even good) to kick me out on to the street if I was noncompliant. Hilariously, I'd nearly been sold into sex trafficking not two months before I went to ERC, when I was 17, and I'm like, y'all, if you'd kicked me out I'm absolutely sure I would have been trafficked for real. Like, damn, talk about a bad idea. The whole reason I developed the eating disorder, self harm, suicidal behavior etc was because I was sexually abused as a kid, but we weren't ever allowed to discuss anything of any real import in therapy groups, and anyway, I was just A Problem Child, not traumatized /s

To this day, I still can't handle the word "manipulative". I use it very occasionally myself, but for the most part, seeing it used to describe anyone just makes me bristle. Even genuinely manipulative people. I just can't handle it. I was branded as manipulative so many times just for hurting and wanting real help.

I know that most other patients there went through worse things than I did, but I don't know the extent at all. It seemed like the younger the kid, the worse the abuse. Some of the young kids were able to quickly adapt and become The Perfect Patient, but those who didn't, got it bad.

I'm glad that I was relatively lucky (a three month stay, a somewhat less abusive center, being older). But all of these places just piss me off so much. The general public knows nothing about it. I've lurked on this subreddit before and finally decided to bite the bullet and post on it. I know my RTC experience wasn't anywhere close to as bad as it gets, but it still screwed me up for a long time. Luckily, I'm 100% mentally healthy and happy these days, but it took a lot of work and was only ever made worse by ERC and abusive therapists like them.

[arsenicpanda]

If you haven't received the prompt yet: 001 for Riverdale, 002 for Bughead and 003 for Jughead. I'll give you some new prompts if you've received these already :P

I have not received these, thanks so much!  Let’s go!001 | Riverdale

Favorite character: Jughead, but Betty’s a close second

Least Favorite character:  Of the characters that actually recur, I’d say Hal because ugh.  Hal.

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): bughead, choni, varchie, joavin, falice

Character I find most attractive: Toni is the most attractive, but I am personally the most attracted to Jughead, and it distresses and upsets me because.  Because Jughead Jones, what the fuck.

Character I would marry: I would not marry a single one of these disaster people.  I am not capable of the amount of crime required of a Riverdale relationship.

Character I would be best friends with:  Veronica, because she is one cool and nice lady who would cut a bitch for her friends.

a random thought: My favorite way to pitch this show is: a.) there exists an episode with a room full of wigs and it is exactly as weird as it sounds b.) an actual episode description: newly-minted junior gang leader Jughead Jones and future mob associate Archie Andrews drag race the leader of the gang the Ghoulies to get the drug jingle jangle out of the schools and off the streets and it is exactly as weird as it sounds.

An unpopular opinion: I really liked season 2b; it’s my favorite.  It’s like live action Durarara!!, full of crime and darkness and wtfery.  It is exactly to my tastes, and I love it.

my canon OTP: Betty/Jughead, hands down.

Non-canon OTP: This is a rare occasion where I’m on board with all the canon ships, so…Cheryl/Veronica/Toni?  Can I pick an OT3?  Let’s say I can

most badass character: Cheryl.  That girl is stupid competent and terrifying and I love her.

pairing I am not a fan of: B*rchie.  It’s just…not my thing.

character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another):  The writers criminally underuse Josie and Kevin.

favourite friendship:  Based on what we’ve seen, Betty and Veronica or Betty and Kevin, but I want more of Jughead and Toni and, in an ideal world, Toni and Betty.

character I want to adopt or be adopted by:  Mary Andrews, who was smart enough to leave that helltown, can be my new mom

002 | bughead

when of if I started shipping it.  I genuinely do not know the exact point, but it was before 1x06.  By that time though, I was in deep and so excited when they kissed.

my thoughts:  Somehow this pushed its way pass almost all my other ships to be my all-time second favorite ship, and I’m still not sure how or why?  Like, they’re super sweet, but also full of crime and willingness to do anything for each other, and I think it’s the last part that gets me, but I’m not 100% on that.

What makes me happy about them: Seriously though, they would do anything for each other, and it is absolutely beautiful.  Also, they have so much in common and are clearly on the same wavelength.  Also also, the way they look at each other oh my god, have you ever seen anything so perfect?

What makes me sad about them:  The idea of unnecessary college-related angst and the possibility of them ever breaking up is DDD:

things done in fanfic that annoys me: When they don’t feel like themselves.  Like, Betty is too sweet without her spine of steel or Jughead is just mean as opposed to grumpy and kind of bitchy.  I’m also not a fan of role reversals for this ship; it just doesn’t feel right.

things I look for in fanfic: mutual pining, especially Jughead’s pining because that boy pines SO GOOD.  Also, crime is always a plus!

My kinks:  oh my god, these two…like, you could sell me on most kinks with these two.  But definitely varying levels of bdsm (preference for switch!bughead), choking/breathplay, knifeplay, edgeplay.  Jughead loving to eat Betty out and getting off on her getting off aren’t kinks, but they are things I very much enjoy.  Same thing goes for his love affair with her shoulder and their mutual tendency to cup each other’s faces.  That wig can choke though.

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: hahaha, no.  It would take a different run of the show for that.

My happily ever after for them:  There are only two acceptable outcomes.  1.) Escaping Riverdale and living full lives literally anywhere else. 2.) Staying as co-gang leaders and fighting for the Southside community.  One of them can be a gang lawyer or something, idk.  The point is: crime!

003 | Jughead Jones

How I feel about this character: I love him.  He is so dramatic and full of self-righteousness and devoted to the people and things he cares about.

All the people I ship romantically with this character: Betty.  That’s it.

My non-romantic OTP for this character: I love his friendships with Archie and Toni, but I think I’m more interested in the one with Toni at this point. Unless his relationship with his dad counts, then I pick that one.  Might shift to JB once we meet her though.

My unpopular opinion about this character: I loved him cutting off Penny’s tattoo in 2x09.  It was such a great moment of crazy and desperation and a desire to protect.  It weirdly worked too, even if there were serious repercussions later.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon:  I want Betty and Jughead to solve a crime by committing one.  I also want to watch FP try to parent his son.

my het ship:Betty/Jughead

my fem/slash ship: Jughead/Sweet Pea

my OTP:  Betty/Jughead

my OT3:  Oh god, I am so bad at this.  Uhh…Betty/Jughead/Veronica?

my cross over ship: Jughead/Mikado Ryuugamine (Durarara!!).  They both seem like such nice young men, but then…

my kink:  See the Betty/Jughead answer, honestly.  But also, is the way he looks at her a kink?  It feels like it should be.

a head cannon fact: Jughead has either been in love with Betty for like 3+ years or since she said she believed him about his dad, there is no inbetween.

my gender bend:  None, really. But girl!Jughead would have the most beautiful hair, much like boy!Jughead.

[thank-your-lucky-stars]

So when I’m asked about The Theory™ or if I think there’ll be a twist in this Robron/Rebecca/baby snooze-fest storyline, it’s honestly hard to know how to answer because I’m constantly flip-flopping between; “there must be a twist, this is too stupid to be real.” and “this is so stupid, and written so badly, surely they aren’t clever enough to make it more than it seems?”

There are a lot of storylines I haven’t liked, not just with Robron and not just with Emmerdale, but I have appreciated that they’ve been well told, well written, and well executed. This storyline has been bad and unnecessary, but above that it has just been executed so poorly.

All of this could’ve been done while keeping all the characters intact (even Rebecca’s!) Like....that’s what bothers me most, the way there have been times where they have just utterly slaughtered these characters (Robert especially), and it has just been....unrealistic? That’s what’s most hard to stomach for me. I can handle most things as long as they’re believable.

I ended up watching last Friday’s episode (the episode following on from Maxine’s). I’d been told not to watch it, but I reached a point where I just thought “screw it” and I did. Honestly, it wasn’t actually as bad as I expected. To me it was just....lazy. Like really shockingly lazy.

The scene in the pub. It was like the writer (I believe it was Sharon Marshall but correct me if I’m wrong?) had been told “right, we need Chrissie to blurt out to a pub full of people that Bex is still pregnant.” It was like Sharon yawned, rolled her eyes, and just....couldn’t really be arsed to think of a realistic way in which Chrissie could do this.

So she had Robert randomly man-handle Bex for literally no reason??? More or less unprovoked, he just grabbed her?? It was so stupid, that I don’t even accept that as a thing that happened; I accept it for what it was, which was an Incident purely to provoke Chrissie to yell “don’t, she’s still pregnant!” or whatever the chuff she said. 

It was lazy. Which....yeah, lazy writing happens. But why did she have to make Robert behave like that?

If the writer had’ve just taken like.....3 minutes, she could’ve come up with a situation which wouldn’t make Robert look like a mad-man. It took me approx. 30 seconds to think of a realistic scenario that would’ve prompted the needed reaction from Chrissie without throwing Robert under the bus yet again.

Say Aaron goes over to C+R, as he did. Has a word, as he did. Then Chrissie could’ve made some bitchy comment (which she kinda did, but....it should’ve been worse). So say Chrissie says something mean to Aaron “you’re a total idiot forgiving him, what a mug you are!” etc etc.. Cue Robert standing over Chrissie, in an intimidating fashion, protecting his husband and himself, but NOT BEING PHYSICAL WITH HER. Just standing over her and telling her to shut her mouth or something.

Then Rebecca could’ve jumped up to her sister’s defence, knowing full-well Robert wouldn’t hurt her but not liking the way he’s standing over her. Say Aaron puts a hand on Robert’s arm too, trying to get him to cool it.

And then Robert sort of shrugs both Bex and Aaron off, not aggressively as such, but just enough for Bex to lose her footing and maybe stumble into the table (she’s dramatic, it would work). Then Chrissie can deliver her Needed Line and be like “omggzzzz careful, she’s still pregnant!!!11!!!” and BAM - the required moment, the typical Pub Reveal is achieved.

Like....it took me about 10x longer to type it out than it did to think of that. Because.....it’s really not hard.

But this is Emmerdale’s problem lately; it seems like people - the writers - just simple cannot be arsed. And that is why this storyline is a shitshow. This is why it’s embarrassingly bad. And this is why I’m unsure if there’s a twist or not.

Is this done on purpose? Do the writers know a big twist is coming, and they either A) are just going through the motions until things Get Good, B) they think this whole thing is stupid so they literally cannot be arsed to try and make it any good, or C) this is all deliberate; they’re fucking with us, deliberately being inconsistent, unrealistic, messy, lazy, just so we lose faith, so that when The Twist finally comes, it’ll be all the more surprising, like “omg!! they tricked us, this is awesome!!!” 

or maybe it’s D) and there is no twist, this storyline really is this bad, the writers know it’s this bad, and they’re just....putting as little effort into it as possible.

OR MAYBE IT’S E) and they actually think this is good, they think they’re doing well, but it’s just coming across badly on screen?

This is why I’m so unsure. There are enough loose ends to make a twist totally believable. I do think Bex is actually pregnant, because if she isn’t then they’re really going to have to explore her mental health, as clearly there is something very, VERY wrong for someone to go to these extremes to pretend; or maybe if she isn’t actually pregnant, she believes she is. So ED would have to explore some kind of delusion, we’d have to dig deeper into Bex and her mind which would be something we have never, ever had. She’s not a real character at this point, so I would actually be totally down for this. I wonder if ED actually care enough to explore this, which is why I think she really is pregnant.

If she really is pregnant (it does seem so), it’s so bizarre that nobody has really questioned whether or not the baby is definitely Robert’s? Like even Aaron? Like he asked if R+R were “safe” when they slept together, but he didn’t say “yeah but how can you/she be 100% sure the baby is yours...?” - like I’m not sure why they’re making all of these characters appear to be utterly stupid when they’re not? If I was Aaron or Robert, I would be demanding a DNA test. No question at all. If I was Bex I’d want a DNA test too. Same if I was Ross!!!

Like....there are so many holes it makes my brain ache. I’m honestly trying not to think about it too much, or speculate too much, because....it hurts. It’s exhausting. There are so many holes and loose ends that we could all go on until the end of time about why this is stupid, why there HAS to be more to it....

....but as time goes on, I don’t know....it seems less and less likely.

But I’m also convinced Moira is pregnant? I haven’t watched ED since like Tuesday or something, and I’ve missed the odd episode before that (for example, Maxine’s Thursday episodes the other week, I’ve only seen the Robron stuff, as I was working/out/away and literally didn’t have a chance to catch up with several days worth of episodes until Wednesday) so I don’t know if anything more has been said about why she’s been acting odd lately, but I do think it’d be awesome if we/she found out she was like 6 months pregnant or whatever, with either Pete or Cain’s baby. In which case.....like I know two women are allowed to be pregnant at the same time, but would they really have two complex baby storyline’s going on at once? 

This is getting long and I know I’m offering nothing new, but I haven’t really spoken about any of this in weeks haha, apart from briefly in a few chats with people, and I was just sort of thinking more about the behind the scenes stuff (the writing) than trying to write meta for the characters or anything, because I don’t feel like we’re having enough consistency for me to try to understand what’s going on in Robert’s or Aaron’s heads right now, because - apart from Maxine’s episodes - it just has not been good enough and it’s all been about plot instead of the actual boys.

We had that Friday episode ending with that “showdown” between Aaron and Rebecca, and in the next episode it was like it never happened. Friday ended with Aaron seemingly completely thrown, contemplating his entire marriage, and then the next time we see Robron everything is kind of okay, and there’s no mention of what Bex said?? Does Robert even know Aaron saw her? We had Aaron crying, more or less saying he couldn’t accept the baby, and then in the next episode he’s like “whatever you want to do is fine by me” to Robert???

Then we had Robert apparently not giving a flying fuck about Bex and the baby, and the next he’s anxiously looking at his phone waiting for news on Bex/the baby when she’s in hospital.

So like....there’s too many gaps to try and figure out WTF Aaron and Robert are properly thinking right now. And it’s really poor storytelling, and it looks even WORSE off the back of Maxine’s episodes, which were consistent, realistic, character-driven and they MADE SENSE. Which is something most other episodes have been lacking lately.

So yeah. For now I can only really focus on the motives of the show as a whole, of the writers, of the behind the scenes crap....because all of this has been so poor, so poorly executed, that it’s made it hard for me to connect to the characters involved properly, which therefore makes it impossible for me to really focus on their thoughts and feelings right now (apart from Aaron knowing his husband cheated which is just......almost too painful for me to even really contemplate lmao).

I still want to talk about ED, about Robron, about Aaron and Robert as individuals.....like I don’t want to lose that. But what’s been happening on screen for over 2 months now has been so exhausting and disappointing that I don’t really have too much to give right now (apart from all of this!!! which is a lot longer than I anticipated!) 

so yeah....I’m just trying to get my head around all of this, trying to figure out whether to properly truly accept this as our reality or whether to desperately hang on to a twist that might never come. I’m honestly, genuinely in a constant battle between thinking “this is it” and “this can’t be it”. So....yeah!