#he’s another slightly modified random sky

[dhm-rising]

Ocean Guardian

Male Obelisk - Water Glowing

Midnight/Storm/Orca

Laced/Facet/Points

[imaginativewriter23]

Dokja Kim x Reader - Dandelions

Based on the song Dandelions by Ruth B.

Notes: Not edited. Just kinda a random thought and decided to write for this wonderful and underrated man.

© 2022 imaginativewriter23 All rights reserved, do not modify. Reblogs are appreciated! If you’d like to repost on a separate platform please ask for permission first!

You squeezed the stem of the white dandelion and shut your eyes until your nose scrunched up.

Dokja's hand rested on his hip as he raised his eyebrow looking down at you crouched on the ground.

You sniffled your nose from the wind blowing the white buds around you like snow.

"Are you done?" Dokja dryly asked.

You quicky hushed him, "I was just about to make my wish but you interrupted me."

Dokja huffed and looked at Gilyeoung and Sangah near the other side of the field mimicking your movements and making a wish upon a dandelion they plucked from the grass.

"Besides," you called to him, "I don't think a guy wearing a robe should be making fun of me."

Dokja grumbled, "You know if I got the chance, I would be wearing normal clothes."

You giggled and clutched your dandelion tighter.

Dokja moved to crouch down beside you. He rested his chin on his hand and watched the dandelions dance in the field.

Finally, you opened your eyes, took a deep breath in and blew into the dandelion and it's white buds into the air.

The fuzzy white buds dispersed into the sky. You placed the naked dandelion down and watched as your wish flew to the heavens.

"What'd you wish for?" Dokja asked.

You clutched your pants, "If I tell you, it might not come true."

"You made me wait that long for something I'll never know?"

You looked over at him and pursed your lips. You hummed and made a dramatic thinking face for a bit.

"No, I'm still not telling you."

Dokja made a face.

You sat on the ground and moved your legs to the side of your hip. You placed your palm on the ground to support yourself.

"Careful, you'll hurt your hand."

You chuckled and placed your hands in your lap instead.

"Why don't you make a wish?"

Dokja looked at the dandelion in front of him, "How do I know it will come true?"

"You don't. You're the one who has to make it come true. The dandelion just may send luck your way to help you."

"You're not wrong there."

Dokja pulled the first dandelion he saw out of the grass.

"Now, what do I do?"

"Exactly what I just did."

Dokja closed his eyes and thought carefully about what he would like to wish for.

You watched as some of the dandelion fuzz fell into his hair. You depicted how his bangs flowed with the wind and how his fingers carefully held the stem.

You could feel your heart soaring just by looking at the art beside you.

"Are you done?" You mocked.

He opened one eye and glared at you. Then, closed his eyes again.

He racked his brain to choose one wish. There was so many to choose from. But, there was one glaring wish he wanted to come true. If dandelions did help make wishes come true, he'd happily use it on this.

He opened his eyes and gently blew on the dandelion. The white buds adding to the sky once again.

You smiled, "Good job. What'd you wish for?"

Dokja frowned, "You first."

You hummed and played with your fingers, debating whether or not to share.

"Remember," Dokja propped his chin on his hand, "only you can make it come true."

You looked at Gilyeoung who was gawking a butterfly.

"I wished..." you felt your cheeks burn and turned back to your lap. You clutched your pinky finger.

Dokja stared as some fuzz blew past you as if you were an angel. He almost gawked at your long lashes and beautiful lips.

You took a deep breath and looked at the field, only to see Gilyeoung who was running towards you in the field.

You stood up, "Hm, maybe another day I'll make it come true."

Dokja's lips parted slightly and he stared at your rosy face. He turned to the dandelion field where Gilyeoung ran up to the both of you.

"Look! A butterfly landed on my finger!"

You gasped, "Wow, that's amazing! Look, Dokja."

Dokja stood up and patted Gilyeoung's head, "You really must be Fabre."

Dokja walked towards Sangah who was a few feet away from Gilyeoung.

"Are you ready to go?" He asked Sangah.

Sangah furiously nodded, "Yep! Gilyeoung and I made a lot of wishes! Did you make any wishes, Dokja?"

"Only one." He answered.

"Ah, what did you wish for?"

Dokja peeked at you with his peripheral vision, "I wished..."

You patted Gilyeoung's back as he smothered himself against your stomach.

Gilyeoung lifted his head to look at you, "Did you wish for anything?"

You glanced at Dokja without moving your head, "I wished..."

'that one day you would be mine.'

[taihjj]

Crash | Jujutsu Kaisen Imagines

Gojo Satoru | Angst | F! Reader

Summary: Achieving your dreams means loosing and gaining something in return. In your case, you must lose him to grasp your goal.

© 2021, All content belongs to taihjj. Do not repost or modify.

“I guess we can no longer look back, huh”, you smiled, staring at the tall man. His uniform has holes and scratches, drenched in blood.

Gojo Satoru gritted his teeth together, an insane amount of curse energy flowed to his chest.

“Don’t ever come closer to us nor to any students in Jujutsu Tech”, his beautiful yet dangerous eyes rolled in your direction.

Indeed his power awakened. You mused, head tilting to the side to avoid his gaze. One look and you might die from the tremendous curse energy igniting from his body.

 “Ya’ hear me, (Y/n)?”

The pillars of your heart started to crack, the once love and meaning of your world faded. You can feel a burst of a tear about to flow, eyes slightly watering from your lover's stern voice. One can never quantify or describe the amount of hate and disgust he has on his tone.

You flash a peace sign, swallowing the tears of sorrow down your throat. A big wide smile grew on your face, you faced him. It was then you knew, it will be the last time you will see the sky ever so blue and colorful again.

“Will you be alright with that, Gojo?”

The number of memories and meaning behind them all can never be explained nor can be erased. Will he be fine to start another journey all by himself? Will he be all right to fulfill a dream the both of you poured your hearts too and built together? The question hit the man harder than he thought.

The young white-haired man clenched his fist together. Why did it come to a point like this? Why can’t it be those days where the both of you would laugh at weird things. Why do you have to stray away from him?

“Stop talking, damnit”

Without looking he can hear the click of your heels, growing distant from his position. Every step, his heart hammers on his chest. Every step, he wonders what you become.

You were virtuous, who believed that jujutsu sorcerers are people as well. They are not a tool used for personal profit nor to feel inferior to humans. what caused you to change?

“Don’t worry Gojo”, You stifle a laugh and shake your head. You place your hands on your waist, looking up to the dull life.

“I’ll get going now”. You further swallowed the bitter taste on your tongue when a fading hard sob reached your ears, you closed your eyes to wither all shivering feelings. 

As if the pride tab of the teacher was tapped, Gojo produced an obnoxious laugh. He smiled brightly, pointing his students, “of course, I raised good students. Especially, Yuji-kun”

“bored? Y/n?”, a familiar deep yet playful voice called out. However, the man knew well to conceal his location. What do you expect from him though? A smirk grew on your face, “Happy seeing your student's, aren’t you?”

A sigh left your lips, leaning on a random tree. You expected a bigger view of the new student, Itadori Yuji, the vessel of Sukunas, performance on the battlefield but only arrived to see them playing baseball.

Although to you, the dullness that remained for the past few years became lighter. It was almost the same during your years in jujutsu Highschool played all over again. 

You stayed at the very back of the baseball field, observing the Kyoto and Tokyo students.

“Despite everything, it’s nice that we could still smile and wave at each other, (Y/n)”, you snapped out of your daze. Two heavy and warm arms wraps around your shoulders, the short hair you knew that became longer, tickles the side of your face. 

He continued loudly boasting about his students, making sure that the Kyoto teachers and principal could hear his voice at a far distance. It only made them dislike him more.

Don’t look back. The voice inside your head says. If you do, you will never forgive yourself for missing him, you want to hold him, and to look back and continue the unforeseeable future you used to share with him. You got what you wanted now, to be the head clan, in exchange for turning against him. 

You were drowned with his voice, a sun peeking through the sad and dark path you kept crossing. Even if your past lover cannot see it in you, a bright light slowly sheds on your night.

“I am right here, (Y/n)”, Gojo whispers, the grip on your shoulder increases, pushing you closer to his yearning body. “Please come to me”

“Come back”

Come back to him. Even when you hurt him, exchanged him for your selfishness. Make more memories with him. Continue the wishes you made with him, change the jujutsu world. Your lips tremble, the sorrow you held started coming back. 

“I’ll get going now”

You slowly push him off, never even sparing a glance in his direction. His blindfold slowly started to get damp. 

Gojo felt your smaller and rough hands hold his arms, resting your body against him. His blindfolded eyes travel to yours, “Please, find something more important to you than me”.

Once more, he can hear the click of your heels, growing distant from his position. Every step, his heart hammers on his chest. Every step, he wonders why didn’t he stop you from straying away from him. 

The most powerful jujutsu sorcerer gave himself a small pity smile, his shoulders hanging low, “Will you be all right with that, (Y/n)?”.

What a joke. The words you gave him, the day when he confronted you for executing Riko Amanai in exchange to be the right hand of your clan. Gojo knows that you think it was wrong. She was just a child, seeking to have a peaceful youth. But, what is so wrong to be selfish for once? I am a human, aren’t I?

“What if you begin to miss me, (Y/n)?” 

You stopped, turning to face him. Gojo's blindfold was off, his hair fell on his face. The messy white hair accompanied his sorrowful eyes. Once more, you gulped down the bitter taste feeling. You threw a peace sign in his direction, smiling.

“Then I’ll make myself remember a memory, a time we spent together, come back again”

© 2021, All content belongs to taihjj. Do not repost or modify.

[another-writer]

Stars in the Sky

Bucky x reader

Word count: 2.2k

Warnings: tooth-rotting, cavity-inducing fluff. Kinda slow-burn. Kinda not.

Summary: You’re alerted to the fact that everyone seems to know how you feel about Bucky, except Bucky himself - you’re suddenly compelled to do something about it thanks to some quick intervention. Did I write another verison of something I already wrote because I like this better? Yes. Yes I did.

It’s a one shot on its own,  but it’s sort of a part two to this guy here

You often noticed a lot about Bucky’s habits. He drank green tea to help him sleep; he flinched at the sound of white noise from the radio. And sometimes - most of the time - he would glance up at the sky, raking in the moon, usually as he entered the compound after a mission. Once you prodded his rib, walking alongside him, and pointed up where the International Space Station could be seen - you remembered to look the date up for him - snickering endearingly at his interest. Since then, looking up at the ISS sort of became a thing between you both. Another time, when you tried to impress him again, he ended up correcting you -

‘That’s Mars, kiddo. Mercury usually comes around later in the year.’

Bucky would get the most smug look across his features, the only energy he would show as you both dragged your feet along with the rest of the team into the compound for a much-needed bout of recovery. It was well-natured competition, trying to spot the planets or map out constellations, debate who was right, or which constellation was better, or working to find the ISS first knowing when it would be in orbit. You knew little, but you would stay up to read random facts, just to fuel Bucky’s ramblings. Bucky could be grounded, earthed in reality, but his eyes absorbed the stars and held them close. It was poetic to see.

‘Hey, [Y/N]?’

‘Sam,’ you replied distractedly, looking up at him from where you sat on the living room floor, Tony’s blueprints spread out in front of you.

Sam had poked his head around the door frame. ‘So, Natasha and I know you’re into Barnes and I bet her ten bucks I could get you guys to admit it. For the sake of my pride, could you just ask him out and then give me credit if Nat asks?’

You blinked and your mind went blank.

‘Wait, what?’

'I said I could do it in two weeks -’

Blood rushed to your cheeks. ‘Okay, thanks Sam,’ you said through gritted teeth.

‘- and I really wanna win this -’

‘I know,’ you seethed.

‘Oh, and we know Bucky likes you too -’

‘I know!’

Wait - what?

Your mind scrambled immediately, only just clocking what Sam had said.

‘Hey,’ Sam cheered lightly, smacking the doorframe in victory, deciding to ignore your panic-stricken state, ‘yes you do, that’s the spirit! Also, if you don’t do anything about it, I’ll resort to telling him because we can’t take the pining.’

You gathered yourself, unable to even respond to his last statement.

‘Go - away.’

But Sam was already out of sight before you could speak. You heard his footsteps began to distance, and your shoulders slumped, realising just how tense you had become in the past thirty seconds.

Was Sam right?

You and Bucky had a relatively fast friendship; you both were able somehow to encourage each other in the most childish activities which developed into a mutual trust. You told yourself you appreciated your other friends in the same way, but you couldn’t help it - you had an undeniable soft spot for Bucky. It just was never considered romantic to you because ... well, it wasn’t as if it could go anywhere. It wasn’t as if Bucky felt the same way.

You ran your hands through your hair, clutching it at the nape of your neck. There was a chance Sam was wrong. Perhaps you were unknowingly obvious in your feelings for Bucky - which was embarrassing enough - but ... Of all the bad dates or failed relationships you’d had, it wasn’t as if Bucky decided to step up to the plate.

But what if Sam was right?

The idea of pretending that Sam had never said anything to you was more attractive than acting on his words. But the worry that he would go to Bucky weighed heavily on you over the next couple of days. Needing his own space, Bucky tended to be in and out of the compound, sometimes spending nights in his own apartment not too far away. You were banking on the probability that if Sam and Bucky weren’t in proximity, you wouldn’t have to worry too much.

But you felt slightly paranoid, and you busied yourself with work that wasn’t even important to find an excuse to spend time alone. You hated how irrational you felt towards the situation. If Sam was going to out you anyway, you figured you may as well take things into your own hands.

Sam had said two weeks. You could work with two weeks.

By the time the following Thursday had rolled around, you had come up with a semi-constructed plan. Or, more of a back-up plan. If things felt like they were going south, you could easily distract him with the meteor shower that was on that night.

You managed to set everything up within an hour, early in the morning, taking a little longer to bring everything there in the first place. For the sake of your sanity, and making sure no one could walk in on your masterpiece, you asked FRIDAY to keep the top floor on lockdown (after alerting Stark, the man would freak if he’d found out somebody had done so without any warning); you were shuffling back into bed by sunrise, mind flooded with every possible scenario of what could come.

You wondered if Bucky would have said something by now if he did like you. He hadn’t, but perhaps it was for the same reason you hadn’t either - you hadn’t really allowed yourself to feel that way. Sam had pretty much opened the floodgates. 

You took a deep breath and leaned back against your door, sliding to the floor so your knees were drawn to your chest and held your phone in your hand, pausing for a moment before messaging Bucky to come to the compound that night.

Around six in the evening, you had FRIDAY re-open access to the top floor and had been waiting since - purely out of nerves - for Bucky to arrive.

‘You been waiting long?’ he asked, stepping out of the elevator nearly an hour later at your agreed-upon time.

You leaned into him instrictively as he put an arm around your shoulders, walking with you to the balcony.

‘No, you’re just in time,’ you breathed, sliding the door open, walking out first and gesturing for Bucky to follow you.

‘And remind me what we’re doing up here again?’

‘We haven’t hung out in a while,’ you reasoned, ‘it’s been weird.’

‘It has been ... but if I think about it, we usually hang out closer to the ground.’

‘Just trust me on this, Barnes,’ you promised.

Or don’t, you thought. It could go horrifically wrong.

It was cold outside, but not windy or wet or humid. The air nipped at your neck and fingers and sliced through your clothes. You realised you had honed in on the strand of Bucky’s hair that had fallen by his eye, flicking slightly in the breeze and looked away at the skyline. The sky was clear, dotted with stars. You walked and maneuvered so that Bucky’s back was immediately facing what you had set up; he was looking at you curiously but didn’t seem suspicious.

‘What’s going on?’ Bucky whispered.

You put your hands on Bucky’s shoulders and pushed gently, prompting him to turn around.

The balcony overlooked multicoloured lights dotted around the otherwise pitch black city, lighting the fallen snow like stained glass, the foreground standing conspicuously against the ink sky.

There were electric lanterns placed on the coffee table and armrest of the couch emitting warm white light that spread over the couch cushions and a mountain of blankets. A reed diffuser producing the scent of a bonfire and another that smelled like roasting marshmallows sat on a smaller side table next to a record player that was currently silent. You stared at it in contempt, thinking it was stupid to have it there. God, this whole thing was stupid. But you honed in on the telescope you had worked on for three days to modify. For some reason, it grounded you; it was like a distraction.

You watched Bucky take in the surroundings; his Adam’s apple was bobbing and his lips curled into a smile as he shook his head and rubbed his forehead.

‘What is all this?’ he asked, but he sounded … contented. Gratified.

Your hands were in fists, pushed into the pockets of your hoodie. Frankly, most of you was ready to run away.

‘I know you’re to be obsessed with this stuff,’ you said. ‘There’s a meteor shower tonight ... Thought it’d be nice.’

He nodded, thoughts spiraling and eyes glazing over. ‘This - this is amazing, I - ... thank you.’

You bit your lip, smiling fondly at his reaction, perching on the arm rest of the couch with your feet on the seat. ‘What was that thing again, your mother getting you a telescope?’

‘You know that story.’

‘Yeah, but I like it,’ you reasoned, resting your chin on your hand.

Bucky looked down, and you noticed a pink tinge to his cheeks you weren’t sure was a consequence of the cold or your words.

‘When my ma piled together a few pay cheques once and bought me a telescope?’ He paraphrased your words, sitting next to you. ‘It must’ve been like this big –‘ he added, placing his hands about a foot away from each other grinning at the memory. ‘I could barely see anything from it but I -’ He paused, seeming self-concsious like he usually did - ‘I’d, like, imagine there was this city on the moon and I’d think about how I’d get there one day.’

You felt your heart flutter his story, almost overwhelmed with how endearing it was, and decided to distract yourself. You took one of the blankets and draped it over Bucky’s shoulders, not missing the knee-buckling yet contented look he was giving you. You picked up the silver thermos from the coffee table and the dark blue mug and poured out a helping of green tea.

‘Think you’d still wanna go?’ you asked, handing him the mug that he cupped with his right hand for warmth.

‘Maybe one day,’ he shrugged, sipping his tea before setting the mug on the table. ‘I kinda like it down here too much at the moment.’

The momentary silence that settled was relishing, and you shared a look with him that felt new, weighted with something - a sort of warmth - you hadn’t seen before. Or, perhaps you just hadn’t noticed it.

‘So, Barnes,’ you cleared your throat, and leading him to the telescope, ‘you are promised a clear night; Venus is in orbit and there’s a meteor shower predicted for nine o’clock right until five a.m tomorrow.’

You knew he hadn’t dropped his curiosity. To his credit, you wouldn’t have either. But nonetheless, he was transfixed as

‘What is this for?’ His tone, though somewhat calm, was becoming slightly taunting. You didn’t hear malice, but you were slowly becoming more and more self-embarrassed.

You couldn’t tell him. The words were caught in your mouth. Even if you were brave enough to let him know how you felt, you had no idea how to express it.

‘For the meteor shower,’ you shrugged, ‘why else?’

‘[Y/N] ...’

‘James.’

‘How come no one else is here?’

‘Well, not everyone’s a space nerd like you.’

You falted under his gaze, and then it clocked. Bucky was giving you that look. When he figured something out before you did, outsmarted you, when you conceded in the last debate over Perseus being a better constellation than Orion.

And you wanted to throw up. You folded your arms over your chest, feeling your entire stature become stiff.

‘Oh my God, you know.’

Bucky shrugged casually. ‘Yeah, but, I wanna hear you say it.’

You clenched your jaw, trying to stifle the embarrassment bubbling in your gut. You can settle this. You’re rational. Don’t say anything. Deflect it back to the telescope. Something. Anything.

‘Were you always this annoying, or is that new?’

Oops.

You hoped you sounded as nonchalant as you meant it.

Bucky scoffed, the laugh lines around his eyes creasing. ‘Oh Doll, ‘m sorry, c’mere,’ he snickered as he closed the distance between you, englufing you in a warm embrace.

His arms locked comfortably around your waist and you blushed furiously when you felt him kiss your forehead and rub his hand on your back soothingly. Stiffly, and slowly, you wound your arms around him, heart jolting when he took it as invitation to hold you tighter, swaying ever so slightly.

You were thrown and confused, more so than sad. You were preparing for dismissal anyway. But you still felt a hollowness. Still, it was the most physically comfortable you’d ever felt. Bucky Barnes in a blanket was a gift to the world and you didn’t want to let go.

‘In defense,’ he said, ‘I didn’t really know until today.'

'’M not actually upset Barnes, you know that,’ you said casually, though your voice was tight.

‘I know,’ he said quietly. There was an underlying uncertainty in his voice. ‘You - ... You’re braver than I am, you know that?’

You cringed at yourself. ‘Jesus, ‘m so sorry -’

‘[Y/N], no, shut up.’ He leaned back, to look at you, the distance only fractional between you both. ‘You’re doing what I couldn’t.’

Doing what he couldn’t?

‘I didn’t think I should tell you,’ he continued, not quite able to meet your gaze as his voice began to trail. ‘Things were so comfortable, I thought you’d want them to stay the same.’

Bucky was looking at you like … like you had put the stars in the sky. Like you had single-handedly painted the snow and built the city skyline. It was head-spinning and unfamiliar and it made your heart beat wildly when he leaned his forehead against yours. He paused for just a moment like silent question, before softly pressing his lips to yours, your eyes closing as you eased into the kiss, arms going around his shoulders, as if you had done a million times before, holding him until you both needed air. As he pulled away, Bucky pressed severeal kisses - once, twice, across your cheeks, making you grin helplessly before steadying him straight, catching him with glinting eyes packed with a thousand constellations.

Before long and as if fuelled by some new energy, you ushered him to look into the the eyepiece, wanting him not to miss anything. The rest of the night was taken up by Bucky searching the sky, playing around with the telescope to get a better view, and pulling you in front of him, showing you the stars and falling cosmic debris. It was breathtaking, undeniably, but you felt it was only fair to admit that the starry-eyed glaze across Bucky’s features was more distracting at that moment.

And sure, you owed Sam big time. But for now, you felt privileged in the way Bucky shared the stars with you.

[changeling-rin]

Oh boy! Asking time! Which Elder Scrolls races would The Boys be if they were in that world? Also love your work btw.

Upon realizing that I don’t actually know all the races for the Elder Scrolls and promptly falling down a rabbit hole of research to fix that, I now present the following:

Gen is a Bosmer, because I can’t find another good reason for him to have a giant bird as a companion.  There is also, sadly, no good equivalent for living in the sky so you know what we’re gonna roll with it.  Also, their resistance to poison and disease seems like a good prerequisite for a healer to have, you know?

Speck is a Khajiit, and he’s so good at stealth that it’s like he’s not even there.  He can make himself shrink into the shadows until you’d have a better chance of noticing a mouse than him, and sadly this is the best I can do without an actual shrinking spell.

The Four are Bretons, who had an accident with a magic spell and ended up binding themselves together - but they’ve long since stopped caring about that, don’t worry.  They have, however, stopped messing around with magic.  It’s a bit of an odd choice, given their peoples’ natural affinity for it, but given what happened the last time it’s been decided that they should probably leave well enough alone.

Mask and Ocarina are Nords, though I did consider this for Wind because of the nautical factor.  But they seem to be rounded, jack-of-all-trade types rather than specializing like a lot of the other races do, and I like how that works with the Hero(es) of Time’s characters.

Dusk is also a Bosmer, he is an absolute master with a bow.  Plus he’s got this wolf that follows him around and would do anything he says even without Command Animals.

RGBV are Redguards, and they basically specialize in fighting as a unit.  They each focus on a slightly different weapon/style and use it to cover each others’ weaknesses.  They’re a bit odd for Redguards in that they actively choose to be a unit, but whoever said they had to follow the norm?

Lore is an Imperial, which I’m choosing specifically for their Voice of the Emperor ability.  Using your words to distract and calm your enemy sounds a whole lot like Lore’s Distraction Tactics, doesn’t it?

Sketch is an Argonian, because stealth.  He and Speck are the absolute best at what they do, even if Sketch’s brand of it is a bit different.  Where Speck relies on nobody knowing he was ever there, Sketch utilizes a ‘wallflower’ approach.  Sure, you see him, but why bother paying attention?  He’s just about as interesting as that painting he’s standing next to.

Realm is an Altmer, because they have magic for days and so does he.  Now if only it would stop acting up and depositing him in random dragon’s nests.

Wind is also a Breton, because I like how their mixed ancestry plays into his mixed ancestry of being a surviving Hylian of the flood.  Also, their magecraft is off the charts and hello, weather mage here.

Steam is an Orsimer because they’re the craftsman race.  He builds his own Train, modifies it to account for any terrain, and then plows people over with it.  I am honestly relieved that there is a craftsman race because I really wasn’t sure how to categorize Steam without that.  He’s just such a tinkerer, you know?

Shadow is a Dunmer.  Gray skin, red eyes, dark elf, are you kidding me?  I couldn’t have made a better match if I’d tried.  Also they specialize in Destruction Magic and if that doesn’t sound like a house-sized bomb I don’t know what does.

[fandom-will-be-my-fall]

Spill your heart out about Walter.

Okay so I basically got this question in what, January?? but I’m answering it now since I just rewatched the movie and have inspiration, sorry for the late reply Anon

Okay so, to start off this post with some keyboard smashing because that my primary go-to for expressing my emotions

sgklhfsgjksdlgdghkjlgjhOHUFLUSKHDGSLIDRGKJGKFSDHGlhjglksdhkglshglllllfa. knjcthxiudhusmnvsoidhéytbvonjyxclkkvbr. haeylicfvshdkgikc

HANDSOME BOY. HANDSOME. ‘NUFF SAID.

I could legit stare all day at his beautiful face… look at him. Enchanting sky blue eyes… fluffy, wavy brown hair, cute round cheeks, lovely smile… those hidden freckles that you can hardly spot and only in certain screenshots but nevertheless they’re there to raise the cuteness factor… ALSO HIS LASHES. MAYBE IT’S NATURAL?? MAYBE IT’S MAYBELLINE?? WE SHALL NEVER KNOW

Here you may be able to spot the freckles if you squint hard enough. I have 77 screenshots but this is the best example I could find.

Secondly… well, he’s a sticc. A short sticc at that (though still slightly taller than me bc I’m smol), but a sticc regardless! And that seems to be the most attractive cartoon body type for me. Don’t judge me, I just have a thing for twinks, I’m… twinksexual or whatever.

Look at him! He would fit through my doorcrack.

(Maaaybe the reason for me liking sticcs so much is partially the fact that I like the idea of a boyfriend I can protect and support, physically and emotionally. I’m mad at the universe for not letting me scoop him up in my arms bridal style and smooch the HECK outta him.)

I’ve encountered a few posts that claimed he’s got cake but, come on. That concept has canonically been proven to be false, even by Lance. This man is flat and you can pry this opinion off my cold, dead hands.

Speaking of hands! I like his big ol hands. Nice shape. They look soft. I wanna hold them.

According to a DVD commentary, and the visual facts, he has no shoulders whatsoever. Back in Venice Killian was able to restrain him effortlessly with only one foot on his chest, even as he kept struggling ans squirming and generally put in as much effort as he possibly could. Before then, he claimed the database was the first thing he has ever caught in his life.

Conclusion, our boi’s very much NOT athletic. Which makes sense for a scientist, braining all day and stuff, and because he probably barely even eats, or sleeps which are by the way both pretty concerning implications but anyway.

STOP BEATING UP THIS POOR FRAGILE LAD FOR GOD’S SAKE. Makes me want to protect him even more. That’s not necessarily a bad thing, but you get what I mean.

Now, on to the actual reason I’m so head over heels for him, a.k.a his personality.

He is one of the sweetest, kindest, purest boy characters I have ever seen in fiction, if not THE number one himself. (All my other cinnamon roll crushes are, or have been a villain at some point and WILL resort to violence if provoked.) Look at him, his pacifism… is unbreakable. He’s dead set on making the world a better place, by peaceful ways, and helping humanity. If that’s not a quality to be cherished then IDK what is.

And he’s just such a refreshing character. He likes pink, K-dramas, glitter, kittens, things that aren’t traditionally “masculine” (but is never made fun of those things in particular in the movie) and I love that. Nothing’s sexier than a man who’s, despite society’s shitty standards, openly and unashamedly himself!

His femininity is, if anything, just another turn-on. (This didn’t intend to sound sexual… but oh well.) I love his little hand gestures and mannerisms, dorky ramblings, the way he says “yep” popping the “p” at the end, all the small yet significant traits that were incorporated into his character. Bless you, SiD creators, bless you.

Have I said that he’s a genius?? Which is pretty obvious but c’mon, he graduated at 15!! He can modify human genes!! He successfully turned a man into a pigeon on the first try!! (The serum wasn’t the first prototype but we can assume he didn’t experiment on living humans with the previous ones.) And he’s still just 20!! Like what is that if not hella fucking impressive???!??

His inventions, to the untrained eye, may seem “stupid” or “childish” but alas! The observer couldn’t be more wrong! Because despite the odd designs and themes they’re all highly effective, as we have witnessed in the battle against Killian. And he is extremely creative for coming up with such ideas! Told you he’s brilliant!!

Which makes me all the sadder about how much they underappreciated him at the agency. In his words, nobody ever listened to him, or gave him a chance. They just left him and his “weird” ideas next to the men’s bathroom and called it a day. How could they be so blind? Didn’t they see the potential in his inventions? Oh well. Maybe I’m just being a smartass bc I have more knowledge, living outside that universe. But I’m totally right.

And I was honestly ready to throw hands with Lance for hurting the boi even further. (I’d stand no chance whatsoever, but still.)

Oh no baby please don’t cry.

He did cry in that scene though… you could see a tear rolling down his cheek and if it wasn’t for the machine beeping… He did have a pretty rough day afterall. But HEY, if we dwell on it too much the scene loses its comedic effect!! A guy gets sad over a stupid soap opera, har har har!! Now let’s move on, keep it fast and snappy for the kids, don’t let them overthink it!! Can’t have any emotional breakdowns onscreen. Keep it lighthearted y’know. Then let’s kill a random side character and have our dear protagonist almost die twice.

(Well jokes on you Blue Sky! I’m no kid, but a devoted fangirl who can and will overthink any material of my fictional faves at any given opportunity.)

You know what else I love about him though?? His love for animals!! And pigeons, especially Lovey!! He loves her so much, gives her gluten free breadcrumbs, nuzzles her, the first thing he does when he finds out Lance can talk to the pigeons is ask if she loves him too!! Like… That’s so pure and wholesome.

This here. THIS RIGHT HERE. BROTP forever.

(Not gonna lie, I used to be crazy for pigeons for like, an entire year or something. Not as in looking up all the facts there are about pigeons as I do nowadays with cartoons, but I’d feed them regularly and write my little observations on their behaviors. Did you know they sometimes scratch their neck with their leggies like dogs do?)

I think I’ve summed up mostly everything I love about this nerd. Oh wait, almost forgot the sass!! I love how sassy and smug he can be sometimes, in like, a really harmless way but it’s still a very nice characteristic.

Since I’ve ran out of coherent things to say, here’s an incomplete list of things I want to do to Walter Beckett. Put at the end of this post so those of you who were only here for the analysis part and not the selfshippy gushing don’t have to read further:

kiss he

like seriously

just kiss he a whole lot

cover his whole face in kisses

one kiss for each of his freckles. a finishing kiss onto the tip of his nose. then repeat the cycle

hug him. hug him like the world is ending. hug him so tight he can barely breathe

then ofc let go and apologize bc I would never hurt him on purpose

cuddle him

hold him close, let him lay his head on my chest

run my fingers through his hair

listen to his breathing

discover that he’s fallen asleep on me and smile fondly, then soon drift off to sleep myself so we can wake up entangled in eachother the next morning

fuck he

pin him to a wall and snog he

make him go cherry red

fluster he

compliment him. praise him. appreciate him. he’s a prince, a hero, an angel, a wonderful human being and he needs to know this

feed pigeons together

listen to his scientific ramblings and bird facts

write him love letters and give them to him. maybe read it aloud myself if I’m feeling brave so I can see his reaction in real time

serenade he

be the love of his life, and have him be mine

just… soft things, man

cook something for this malnourished sticc

make him small handmade gifts

they’re nothing like his gadgets but I tried

draw he

have him be my muse in general

not like he isn’t now but it would be lovely if he was real too

carry him bridal style

be the feral cryptid that lurks in his house when he isn’t around

sing along to cheesy pop-song together really badly

watch cheesy rom coms

flirt with eachother clumsily until we’re both laughing at our awkwardness

or, alternatively, shower him with compliments until he literally cannot handle it

have sleepovers together

give him hand kisses

be of emotional support

[thebiasrekkers]

Make It Right [BTS Mafia!AU]

Plot: “It’s always darkest before the dawn…” It’s a dog-eat-dog world in Seoul, South Korea. One has to dwell in the shadows in order to reach for the light. What are you willing to sacrifice in order to feel the sunlight on your face? What will it take to drag you back into darkness? How long will the journey be to make it right?

Rating: NC-17 // NSFW

Genre: Series | Mafia!AU | Crime!AU | Angst | Romance/Fluff

Pairings: Jin x OC | Taehyung/Hoseok x OC | Yoongi/Jungkook x OC

Warnings: Graphic Violence, Heavy Language, Angst, Slow Burn, Smut

Previous Chapters: Prologue 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30 31 32 33

Links: FAQ || BTS Masterlist || Admin E’s AO3 || Admin E’s WP || [ REQUESTS ARE OPEN ]

Word Count: 2,764

Tag List: @prisczero​, @pinkpjmin​, @btsaudge​, @flowerwrites06​, @unoriginal-username15432, @halussali​

Chapter 33: Tomorrow

“I hope tomorrow will be different from today...”

© thebiasrekkers (Admin E). All rights reserved. Reposting/modifying our work is prohibited. Translations are not allowed. Plagiarism/stealing is not tolerated by any means. Legal action will be taken in instances of theft.

Occasionally there were things better left unsaid in life. This applied to every soul that could be counted, especially among people. Never tell the woman you were seeing that her ass looked fat despite how many times she asked. Never mouth off to someone who could kick the shit out of anyone who dared to cross them without batting an eyelash. Never reveal bedroom secrets to someone who had their eye keenly on someone else’s bedroom partner.

Yes, some things were better left unsaid and sometimes there were simply no words for what a person may have wanted to say. Keeping lips sealed was often for the best.

Jungkook kept his lips zip-lock tight the day Eden came home from work. She had “the look” on her face – the one that practically screamed ‘I’m deep in thought so don’t fucking disturb me’. He’d been waiting on her for nearly an hour, wanting to surprise her since he finished work early for the day. 

He wordlessly tried to take the groceries from her, but she refused. Instead, she insisted that he reach into her coat pocket for her keys. When he did, however, he was surprised to see that it wasn’t the set of keys he was used to seeing. The brass key was replaced with a stainless steel one and attached to it was a single keychain with a cartoonish looking puppy on it – its expression reminiscent of one of the faces Jungkook often made when he was pouting.

She waited for him to open the door, but the shock was too much. The meaning behind it was way more for him to process at that moment. When Eden shouted at him to open the door, he nervously slid the key into the lock and almost broke it in the jam. Finally, he opened it and quickly took the groceries from her, shuffling inside and almost tripping out of his shoes. She laughed when he tried to give the key back to her, brushing past him to head into the kitchen. Jungkook smiled, putting the key into his pocket. 

Neither of them said anything as they pushed around in the cramped kitchen, trying to put things up without getting in each other’s way. They were mostly successful and when he tried to grab her hand, Eden ignored him and started stripping out of her street clothes while fumbling for her shower things. Jungkook couldn’t keep the goofy smile off his face when he noticed her rosy cheeks, laughing and grabbing for her. He spun her around until he felt he might be sick. He kissed her hard, refusing to allow her to make it to the shower. Not before he made love to her on the floor.

Twice.

When he’d thoroughly worn her out, he laughed and rubbed at his sore shoulder from the punch he’d received from her. But it was worth it. So fucking worth it.

After they showered, Eden shuffled around in the kitchen and made dinner. Nothing fancy. Just a large pot of ramen with some chicken mandu thrown into it as an afterthought. For a moment, all Jungkook could do was stare at her; considering every movement and drinking in her presence. He loved the way she was in that moment: hair disheveled and loosely wavy, her clothes clean but torn and askew – as if she’d fumbled from the bed and walked into a thrift store to pick out her threads at random.

When they finished, he offered to do the dishes, but she insisted on doing them herself. Eden’s bare feet shuffled around on the polished wooden floor and every so often he could see the tattoo on her left thigh peeking out from under the hem of the extra-large shirt she wore. There was no way to explain why it was sexy, it just was.

Moo Shin, he thought, reading the hangul tattoo, Heaven’s warrior.

“I’m going out to smoke,” she said while drying her hands with a kitchen towel. She grabbed both her pack of cigarettes and lighter off the counter, shoving them into her pocket.

Jungkook stood up, grabbing one of the large fleece throw blankets off the couch and followed her. The nights were still a bit chilly, even heading into Spring, and he didn’t want her getting sick. Her hair was still wet.

She sat down on the perch of the roof, knees curled up to her chest, before lifting the lighter up to her cigarette. Jungkook took a seat behind her, wrapping the blanket around them both, before curling her close against his body. She was struggling with the lighter and he reached out, taking it from her and igniting it smoothly with one flick of his thumb. Waiting for her to inhale her first drag of pleasure, Jungkook moved to rest his chin on her left shoulder. Eden turned her head slightly to keep the smoke from his eyes and he smiled. While he often nagged her to quit smoking, he appreciated the little things she did to keep it from bothering him. Not that it did, but he never actually told her that.

“Jungkook-ah,” came her voice, gruff but the tone was soft, “do you want to keep living in the city?”

Smoke pillowed from her nostrils and he felt his left brow quirk slightly, his thumb pressing into her skin as it rolled under her shirt. He didn’t say anything. It was a question that was slightly jarring, and he took comfort in her warmth and scent in order to get his bearings.

It wasn’t like the thought hadn’t occurred to him before. City life was exciting, sure, and there were merits to living in the city. But there were days when he dreamed about returning to Hwaseong. It was country enough that he could see the stars and enjoy them, but small town enough that he wasn’t struggling or yearning for modern conveniences that made life easier.

Shifting while pulling her closer against him, Jungkook urged her silently to turn her body so that her legs were resting on the safer side of the roof’s perch. Eden looked up at him, cigarette poking out from between her lips while raising her brows curiously at him. His hands moved so he could cup her cheeks inside his palms. 

“If you want to stay, then I want to stay. If you want to go, then I’ll go with you.”

He watched Eden’s eyes widen slightly, clearly surprised by his answer. It was a simple one. Jungkook knew she was successful enough to pick up her business and move it wherever she wanted. If she struggled financially with that kind of move, then Jungkook knew he could pick up the slack. His brothers spent the better part of a decade making sure that he never had to spend his money unnecessarily.

“So honestly, Noona, that’s a question I should be asking you ,” he said softly, smiling down at her.

“Jungkook…”

“I’ve been alone for most of my life. Until I met my brothers, I didn’t have anyone. My parents didn’t want me, and I’ve always had to fend for myself. I moved to Seoul because that’s what the others wanted.” His smile fell a fraction and he felt his brows furrow. “…because I didn’t want to be alone.”

He shifted slightly, meeting her gaze, and Jungkook could feel his heart slamming viciously against his chest. Her eyes reflected the night sky, the amber colors of the streetlights giving them an ethereal umber glow. He reached out to grab her cigarette, disregarding it with a toss. She could yell at him after, but right now, at that moment, Jungkook wanted to kiss her and it was in the way. His kiss was not gentle, but possessive and borderline desperate as he claimed her mouth with lips, teeth, and tongue.

He didn’t want to share with her how much all of this meant to him. Not yet. It was still too new. Too fragile. It could be taken away before it truly began. Jungkook never wanted to be able to love her more than in the moment she’d first opened her heart to him, offering to simply be together in the here and now. To trust one another.

How could he tell her that? How could he tell her that he wanted to love her but also wanted to keep her for himself? Jungkook knew how independent she was and how determined she was to continue walking the path she chose for herself.

Would she allow him to walk beside her beyond the present? Beyond tomorrow?

Jungkook couldn’t help but dread every tomorrow that would pass.

Growling softly, he pulled back – sucking her lower lip in the process and releasing it only after he nipped it red and swollen. She breathed softly over his cheeks, smelling like spearmint and nicotine, and he grinned. Eden drove him to the brink. He’d said it before and felt there wasn’t a need to say it again. Instead, Jungkook drug one heavy palm down her side and pressed it between her thighs, flicking his wrist so that he was firmly holding the area he wanted to violate. She did this to him. Made his brain turn to shit and amped his body up for a lot of "mine" fucking. No one could blame him for it.

“This is your fault,” he muttered while grinning, leaning forward so that his mouth brushed lightly against her own, “you should take responsibility.”

He pressed his palm against her again, waiting for that soft little gasp that he loved to hear. He knew she would tell him no, but getting a rise out of her was almost as sweet as getting the green light. And when she said no and finished smoking her cigarette, they would go back inside to finish Empress Ki while cuddled up together on the bed. She would be revved up and distracted with wanting him, feigning sleepiness just to be mean.

But Jungkook knew she wouldn’t be able to take it anymore. She’d pounce and when she did, he would claim every inch of her until she was well spent. And as Eden slept for real, he would whisper to her how he really felt. About how much he loved her, how much she felt like home, and how he wanted to build something meaningful with her beyond tomorrow.

Nothing would be held back.

Seoul – Myeongdong; Jung District South Korea

The city was so loud.

There wasn’t a single instance of silence that could be had. Especially at night. Jungkook hated the city at night. The stars couldn’t be seen and there was so much white noise from the jumbled conversations that muffled around on the streets in conjunction with the ambient sounds from the city.

The parks in the city, thankfully, were a little bit quieter. Jungkook could tolerate the murmured sounds of metropolitan activity when surrounded by trees and nature trails. He sat down on a bench under one of the cherry trees. In a few months, the petals would be a soft pink. Dozens upon dozens of tourists came to take photographs while the locals simply enjoyed the landscape. A sign that winter was finally ending soon.

The bitter chill of everything dying would have renewed vigor knowing that a warm breath of life would follow suit.

“There’s at least one good thing about all of this,” said a voice nearby.

Jungkook lifted his head, peering into the face of Lee Jooheon. He flashed him his trademark dimpled smirk and Jungkook gave a half-scoff in response. Raising one brow, he watched Jooheon plop down onto the bench beside him.

“Oh yeah,” he asked, both of them leaning back in tandem, “what’s that?”

“I don’t have to fuck you up for wandering into our turf.”

“Fuck off,” Jungkook said dismissively, “you’re the one who told me to meet you here in the first place.”

“I know,” Jooheon replied simply, shrugging one shoulder as he rested one arm along the back of the bench, “but that’s because you aren’t some chicken shit. I knew you’d come.” He turned to peek at Jungkook. “You would have come even if you were still a Golden Jackal.”

Jungkook felt his lips press together in a thin line. “I’m still a Golden Jackal, Joo Hyung,” he said, tone even, “that hasn’t changed.”

Jooheon raised a brow at him. “Oh yeah?” He laughed. “Well, that makes oneof you.”

“What the hell does that mean?”

“It means that you’re all a bunch of toothless mutts now.”

Jungkook’s arm shot forward, fist curled and aimed to strike. Knuckles smashed into knuckles as Jooheon’s own fist collided with his. Nerves twitched as the two of them pressed their own weight against the other, bodies shifted toward one another. Jooheon’s smirk still held but Jungkook was far from amused, their arms trembling from the amount of force pressing against each other.

“I guess you’re still the Steel Claw after all,” he said, almost laughing.

Nothing about this amused Jungkook at all. “You’re lucky I don’t rip your spine out for what you did to Eden.”

Jooheon pouted, adding an extra bit of force behind his knuckles to push Jungkook’s arm back a bit. “Hey, I wasn’t the one who did it. That was Minhyuk Hyung.”

“Don’t fucking play word games with me, Yellow Jacket.” The honorific was dropped, replaced with his alias. Jooheon’s expression changed from a playful pout to an actual frown. “As far as I’m concerned, you Jade Fangs are all one and the same.”

Both Jooheon and Jungkook thrust their arms out, breaking the connection and effectively ending the mini strength match they were having. While Jungkook brushed his hair out of his eyes, Jooheon frowned and shook his hand a few times. When he stood, Jungkook followed suit and the two of them remained just a couple of feet away from each other. They continued to stare, not wanting to give off any sign of weakness. They may have dissolved the group, but that didn’t mean that he didn’t still carry himself like a Golden Jackal.

Jooheon could see that now.

Scoffing, Jooheon pivoted on his heels while stuffing his hands into his pockets. Jungkook relaxed a bit, but immediately felt his spine go rigid when his old friend turned around to look back at him.

“Changkyun-ah was serious when he gave that offer to Hoseok Hyung,” he said, craning his neck to face the sky, “and if you guys aren’t going to come back, there’s a chance you’ll try to interfere.”

“Interfere with what, Jooheon?”

“Some advice? You all should leave this city.”

Jungkook narrowed his eyes but said nothing. Jooheon lowered his head, his gaze shifting back to look at him.

“Leave, Jungkook-ah, while we still just consider you eyesores.”

“Ha!” Jungkook half laughed, half scoffed – a single brow raising in question. “Yeah, right.”

This time it was Jooheon who narrowed his eyes. “I’m serious.”

“And why should we?” Jungkook slowly folded his arms across his chest. “Why the hell should I even listen to you?”

“Because whether you remember it or not, we were friends once, Jungkook-ah. If you don’t want to be part of this anymore, I’d rather you not get swept up in the shit-storm that is brewing. And trust me when I tell you that it is coming.”

Jungkook watched Jooheon turn and began walking away, holding one hand up in farewell.

“Consider it a parting gift from an old friend, Jeon Jungkook. Whatever happens after this, just know it isn’t personal.”

He waited until he could no longer see Jooheon before finally falling back onto the bench. Even though he hadn’t done it, Jungkook felt like he’d been punched in the gut. He heard from Namjoon Hyung that a deal was placed on the table in front of Hoseok Hyung, but he didn’t take it. He refused to let their goals be obscured or smeared over someone else’s ambitions.

Pulling out his phone, he looked at the lock screen to spy the time. Instead of paying attention to the actual time, he focused on the picture he took with Eden. They were both smiling. She’d been obstinate about not wanting to take the picture until his own stubbornness had her relenting. It was the first time he got her to smile freely.

His brows knit together harshly as his grip on the phone tightened.

…did we make a mistake?

[phantomphangphucker]

Ectober Day 6 & 24: Silence & Nothing - Nothing To Ring In The Sound Of Silence

Logic says nothing gets to exist forever, but Danny has made a habit of defying both logic and the laws of the universe. But that’s just Danny, not everything or everyone else.

*Note: So I combined these two days in this fic because it just flowed so damn well for me. Originally this was just supposed to be for ‘Silence’ but it evolved. I didn’t really feel it long enough to break into two chapters.

It’s been a long time. A long time since everything happened. A long time since there’s been anyone. Danny stops in his floating to stare at the dilapidated statue of himself, speaking purely to hear sound, “the world’s been silent a long time”.

It hadn’t happened suddenly, of course it hadn’t. That was part of how Danny knew in his gut that he might not be able to do anything. See Danny’s problems, his fights and the catastrophes he stopped, they always popped up suddenly with great alarm. But the slow decay and breaking down of everything’s genetics had crept up on everyone.

It had started with the oldest of creatures and things. Old world ferns and bugs and birds. No one gave much of a damn besides those who truly loves those things. Sure some people mourned the extinctions, but humans had been driving things to extinction for a long time. Most of the world even rejoiced when misquotes seemed to get hit, but the fields of science went into a panic. Because with that drop, so too did many others decline in numbers; bats most notably.

But it wasn’t until some fruit plants started to go that the rest of the world began to worry. There had already been a food crisis and this would make it worse. Other people only cared that they would never get to eat another banana or leaf of lettuce again.

But the commotion was enough to get Danny curious. If this had started back when Sam was still alive, he would have paid attention sooner. But it had been a long time since her, or Tucker, or even Amity. It had hurt when the town had to be abandoned, no longer able to financially support all the excessive damage. Course Danny still protected the place, but repairs didn’t happen much. Leaving the place too destroyed to be inhabitable by humans. But Danny was part ghost, something stagnant, something that didn’t do ‘change’. So he never really left, just made Amity his lair in genuine. Modifying and altering it as he pleased. The roads glowed, the nasty burger always had ectoplasmic food even if no one worked there, buildings began repairing themselves, colours changed according to the halfas mood, etcetera. The rest of the world was perfectly content to let their saviour do as he pleased with the place and it even became something of a tourist hotspot and shrine to Phantom.

But it was also firmly a place no one wanted to actually stay in, catering to Phantom and Phantom alone. And he was weird, he’d always been weird. But after a few hundred years being stuck in between life and death. After losing all his human connections and many of his ghostly ones. He became a little too weird for most of humanity to handle long term. The snapping of fangs, the paranoia, the ease with which he could become a soldier on the battlefield, the utter disregard for his own safety, the treating of serious injuries like old friends and minor annoyances. He was too weird for most ghosts as well, the exception being other older ghosts. But most of those older ghosts were too stick in the mud or loners to be close with Phantom. An endlessly social, silly ghost filled with good-natured trickery and wanderlust. His lair was much the same, prone to playing tricks of the eye or leading people in circles. Sometimes disabling other ghosts powers at random or stealing their things only to return them as soon as the ghost left. The food that grew there, only appealing to Phantom himself. Mustard pickles that tasted of flowers, milkshakes made of frosted flakes that were somehow smooth not crunchy, apples that screamed with the texture of strawberry mousse. So while the place got plenty curious eyes and worshiping filled minds, it didn’t get any permanent residents. Other than the famous half-ghost himself.

And Danny didn’t really mind the silence, the chance to be alone, that his abandoned ghost town of a lair now granted him. It was a nice break from the constant action and sounds of battle that was his everyday life. So he relished it, the silence, the same way he relished floating lazily through the starry sky.

Smiling with nostalgia, Danny lands on the roof of the nasty burger, ghostly tail curling around the sign. Now Amity stood as one of the few places that wasn’t destroyed, that hadn’t crumbled to rot and litter. The irony of that makes Danny laugh. As he puts his head in his hand and looks up at the clear starry sky, light pollution no longer possible. He’d never thought he’d be upset about that. But he is. He is because of what it means. The lack of electricity, the lack of importance for it, the lack of humans, the lack of need for it. Danny’d always adored his night vision, did even more now, but what he wouldn’t give to get slightly blinded and startled by a fluorescent lightbulb suddenly going off. This thought gets Danny floating off the building to poke at a few lightbulbs. Sure electric had stopped being a thing in Amity long before the rest of the world. He had basically told everyone not to bother, seeing as he could and did just light the place with ectolights. What he hadn’t expected was having to eventually light the whole world with them. Now, well, now he didn’t even bother. There was no one or thing to make light for.

Danny himself hadn’t paid attention to, hadn’t really worried about, what was happening until the platypus went extinct. Other mammals rapidly following suit. And when the canines and felines got hit, that’s when the chaos started. When everyone started giving a damn in genuine. When the research got funded like crazy and became the focal point of news or awards.

Danny himself helped out by finding things for the scientist faster than any other person really could and bringing it back faster than even the best hovercoppers or jets could. This was the point where Danny managed to throw the world through another loop, surprise everyone again. No one really knew he was easily as intelligent as his sister, that his mind couldn’t decay because of his halfa state. Couple that with his body being constantly covered in a hazmat suit and being naturally antibacterial, well he was extremely helpful for the scientific and medical community. But Danny couldn’t help much when medicines couldn’t be made any more or when plastic became increasingly rare.

That was another thing about Danny and his problems. They came at him head-on and he faced them head-on. It was a battle, always something he could physically do. But not this time. This had been something marching forward slowly, decaying and eating away at all of life. So Danny did the thing he knew best and looked for ghostly reasons. Searched the Zone for any clues. And that, that’s when he truly began to worry, to freak out. Because the Zone wasn’t getting bigger, it wasn’t gaining any of the dead souls. Sure not everything that died became part of the Zone, but usually at least a third did. For nothing to be going to the Zone? That was more than just worrying, that was logically impossible. Asking around didn’t yield any results, and ClockWork had been concerningly impossible to find. In fact, Danny recalls, ClockWork had been impossible to find ever since then. Which makes him shiver, the implications of that were deeply concerning. Even if the enigmatic time ghost was supposedly immortal, like Danny. He’d even tried finding the other Ancients for answers, to no luck.

By the time he had hopped back into the mortal realm, the scientists had figured it out.

ClockWork had once told him that everything you see, everything you touch, all of it. Everything had a time limit. Everything was at the mercy of time. Even something as simple as genetics or air. And that time was apparently up. Everything’s genetics were functionally breaking down, Mother Nature being unable to reform it anew.

Danny remembers asking if they could reverse it, cloning was perfectly viable now just incredibly immoral and thus illegal. But of course, exceptions were made, except it didn’t work. No matter what they did the clones were never stable. Even cloning things as basic as chemicals failed. It’s chemical makeup or genetics turning to useless goo near instantly. As if forming those things lost was no longer even possible. In the end, Danny wasn’t too surprised, considering what he knew of Dani and her fate. Though a clone of him she had been, she wasn’t immortal, she was never truly stable. Eventually needing more and more treatments till it simply no longer lasted more than minutes. The two had made an agreement, had decided to let her fade with the closest thing to a father she ever truly had. And the closest thing to a daughter Danny would ever have. It would be unfair to bring a child into his half-life intentionally, so he never did and never would. That was a night he had grieved harder than almost any other before it, the ghosts and humans morning the loss with him, knowing exactly who and what the little black and white halfa girl was.

So with cloning written off, they had tried to create near exact replicas. Slightly changing things to try and achieve something stable yet similar enough to the original. There was some success on the smallest level before some extinct plants and missing medications became a lesser worry. Because then, then humans started to fall. Birth rates fell, till eventually there wasn’t a single baby in months. People started dying younger and younger. Started being unable to heal even paper-cuts or recover from the simplest of colds. Everyone became highly trained in first aid purely to keep their own bodies from falling apart on them. Synthetic skin and bones had never been more popular. Bionic limbs became so commonplace that seeing someone without any biometal was startling.

Danny did his part by being a highly mobile medical expert and being a pioneer in Biomech. Seeing as his very specialty was self accessing and self-treating injuries. Sure he frequently had to remind himself that these were humans and that they absolutely could not regrow limbs or liquify parts of their bodies to make reforming breaks easier. But he made it work and his knowledge had been vital for the survival of smaller towns and countries for a long time.

But then everything came to a head, Danny finally got the big impact he was used to. There wasn’t enough humans, nuclear plants were failing, safety measures weren’t being followed, people were ceasing to care. Danny tried to help keep order, but there’s only so much one guy can do. Getting any malfunctioning bombs off the planet, or cleaning water polluted with massive chemical explosions, or making sure collapsing skyscrapers didn’t destroy entire towns; took precedence over being a leader to the humans. Many parts of the world became uninhabitable in a very short amount of time and eventually, all Danny could do was check those areas himself for any change; giving reports back to the humans when he could. But it was at this point that Danny started to not relish the silence or being alone. He was too alone, everything was too quiet. No bugs buzzing, no undercurrent hum of electricity, no animal cries. It made his own voice jarringly loud in comparison, so he fell into silence more and more. Not just to avoid disturbing things or feeling too loud. But also because there started to not really be anything or anyone to talk to more and more.

He’s then reminded of a conversation he had with a young twenty-three-year-old scientist who looked something like a patchwork doll, as he floats to weave in between building windows slowly.

“It’s been a while since I’ve heard a good joke from you, Phantom”.

“Telling them to dirt and rubble feels pretty foolish”.

She had laughed, “yeah, I guess it would”, there was a sigh, a pause in the conversation, “I think maybe you should. Your humour is a pretty vital part of who you are”.

“I’m not fading. I can’t”.

“I know. It’s just. It’s worrying honesty. You always have a joke to throw around, no matter the situation or how bad. Now you seem at a loss”.

“I am at a loss. Ran out of Avengers End Game ones a while ago and those aren’t even relevant anymore. No one even knows what ‘Avengers’ is now. I ran out of material and there doesn’t really seem to be a point to saying them over again”.

“See that, that’s why it’s worrying. You may only be half-ghost, but you’re still not a creature of change. If anything you’re more inclined against change than full ghosts. And yet here you are, changed. And ghosts... ghosts only change truly when reverting back isn’t an option anymore”.

“I’m still perfectly capable of making jokes and finding humour”.

“That’s not really what I mean. I’m saying that... that I don’t really think the reason why you’re out of jokes can be reverted”.

Danny hadn’t responded to that simply watched her with sad eyes and with facts creeping into the forefront of his mind that he didn’t want to hear.

While she continued, “I think your being can tell, knows on some level, that this isn’t a battle for you to face. Isn’t an enemy you can fight. Isn’t a world for you to save. That this just can’t be fixed, can’t be stopped”.

The was a pause for a while before Danny had nodded slowly and stopped floating to sit on the counter, “I’m never one to back down or give up. But, yeah. I don’t have the drive, the protective desire, that I should”.

She had only nodded and gotten back to work.

Shaking his head to clear away the memory, that had been a big thing for him. Really realising his obsession wasn’t acting up, that he didn’t feel the need to help. It had really sealed the deal for him, as all the life around him slowly dwindled away. Which resulted in him spending more and more time with the collections of young humans, less and less time off on his own. The people noticed, seemed to understand. But also strongly had no desire to acknowledge why Phantom was spending as much time with them as he could. Like one does with a dying parent or a pet on their way to being put to sleep.  

It wasn’t long after that when Danny noticed something else, the Zone was...shrinking. Ectoplasm was seemingly beginning to decay and break down as-well. And unlike with the Mortal Realm, the most complex things went first. The most sentient of ghosts. And unlike the Mortal Realm it happened fast; in days even. Pandora’s fading had been cataclysmic, Danny had to hide away her box after ghosts kept stealing it. And that had started a long trend of Danny having to find this artifact or that potentially world-ending weapon, and hide them away. Being forced to split his time between the two dimensions as everything fell apart. Both sides had noticed this change in behaviour. Commenting that Phantom seemed like a man running around trying to keep the sky from falling down. Danny had cracked a few jokes about that, but they lacked the bravado and mirth they usually held.

And by the time the Zone plants started to wither away, Danny had pretty well abandoned the Zone. Instead spending what time he could with the remaining humans and living animals. All there was to see in the Zone was buildings and the occasional flora, which hardly needed his comfort. But all the same, he elected to not tell the humans. Not wanting to stir up hopelessness or panic. Though his actions told them all they needed to know. They just didn’t tell him such.

At this point, humanity was functionally split between anarchists and small communities. The communities eventually falling into anarchy themselves, as people lost any belief in things ever getting better. Danny had watched, tried to keep some level of order for a while. But eventually saw the pointlessness of it and people just trying to have some damn fun at the end of the world. Finally acknowledging what this was, what it had been; the apocalypse. And with this acknowledgment he changed, he joined what was left in screwing around. Unnecessary destruction, reckless self endangerment, the rock star lifestyle. Drugs, sex, and rock and roll. Fast, loose and with complete disregard for the future. What was left of the humans flocked to him at this point, riding the high of someone who could let them do things there’s no other way they could do. To say a lot of things had been crossed off bucket lists and final wishes granted, would be an understatement. Even if it made the loss of each individual person hurt Danny all the more. He really was always a self-sacrificial fool. A weaker more selfish person would have just left everyone to their fates. Not walked by their sides till they eventually could walk no more. Till the world fell and life simply stopped existing.

But Danny did, always would, as he was left standing looking between two worlds were nothing existed anymore. Where there wasn’t even air to make sound or any single thing besides him to break up the silence.

Danny runs his fingertips across the green road, slowly floating to sail outside of his lairs boundaries. To a vast empty expanse, buildings to ash not having his ectoplasm to build them up again and again. Chunks of the planet itself breaking off as the planet's core cooled away. The bits of hard ground illuminated by his glow and the few still travelling light of dead stars alone, the sun having winked out long ago.

Danny turns intangible and slips into the ground, floating down to sit on the Earths core. Before being jarred by his ghost sense going off for the first time in eons. Turning his head to his old mentor and friend, in their white beard and simple purple cloak. Turning his head away as he speaks, “it’s been a long time, Father Time”.

Earning a smirk from the Ancient ghost, “indeed”.

The two sit in silence for a while, Danny laying on his back on the Earths core, “makes sense I guess”.

“You hardly needed me. You and the Earth”.

Danny snorts, “I guess that says it all, doesn’t it. Nothing to do and nothing to help”. The two fall back into silence again, before Danny sits back up and leans into ClockWork to cry. Just the knowledge of something, of someone else being there made the sound of it less massive, less jarring, less painful. As ClockWork rubs his back, giving a level of comfort only a being that saw the end coming and had existed before all other sentient things, could provide.

Danny eventually sniffling and wiping his nose, “is there anything I could have done differently?”.

ClockWork sighs, knowing the self-punishment and blame had been coming, “I’m sorry Daniel, but this is how it has to be. Like all things, everything must have its end. To eventually fade into oblivion and the nothing”.

Danny curls his fingers into ClockWork’s cloak, “but me, I’m still here. I’ll still be here”.

ClockWork pats his head fondly, “of course. Always. Even nothing needs a guardian. And, as it always does, something comes from nothing”.

Danny nods, makes sense he was an Ancient himself but that hardly phased him. Instead asking, “so there will be life again?”.

“And therein lies something that not even time can tell”.

Danny gives a somewhat hallow smile, “I thought you knew everything”.

ClockWork bops him on the nose with a soft smile, “only nothing can know what nothing has in store”.

Danny rests his head on ClockWork’s lap, “so me, the Ancient guardian of nothing”.

ClockWork pets down Danny’s hair as he speaks, “as it always was to be”, leaning over to kiss Danny’s hair, whispering as to not break the silence to severally. The silence that their young companion had grown comfortable with and would surely be surrounded by for a long time to come, “and nothing needs nothing to truly flourish”.

Before fading away and leaving Danny alone to sleep on top of the very core of the planet he loved so very much. As even it too began to crumble away into nothing, having been the last remaining thing in the universe. Once sustained only by Danny’s will and ectoplasm. Now falling away finally, as his being accepts what he truly is. The nothing after something and the nothing before something. The one true constant of the universe. For nothing doesn’t need something to exist but something never exists without nothing. Leaving nothing as the guardian of the universe and the guardian of nothing to guard it all forever.

End.

[kathyprior4200]

Hazbin Hotel: That’s Entertainment! (Remix)

ORIGINALLY OWNED BY VIVZIEPOP, NO COPYRIGHT INTENDED.

 Enter the royal Magne Family

In Heaven, perfection, order, fun, and peace are priorities. God is an elderly man with a similar appearance to Jesus. His Archangels serve has his guards and advisers. They make up a larger angel council, which discuss different matters. Some of the citizens are humans with white wings while others are animal-like. The majority of angels have white faces, red blushes on their cheeks and silky hair.

The dark creepy robotic angels of death are used to exterminate the citizens of Hell to not only reduce their population, but to also plant fear. They have silver weapons that can kill any demon, as well as humans. They were made creepy on purpose: to fight fear with fear. They are sent down once a year to purge the citizens at random.

The buildings in heaven are silver, gold, and some are embedded with precious gems. The citizens learn prayer, singing, dancing, and being kind of each other. The society is heavily bent on rules: honor thy father and mother, no smoking, drinking, lust, or gambling. Cussing isn’t allowed. The barrier separating the worlds is a Christian cross within a circle, similar to the pentagram in hell in the red sky.

  Heaven and Hell are actually two sides of the afterlife coin. Though they may be opposites, they also coexist together. The majority of inhabitants were originally humans from Earth (except the evil humans went to Hell, while heroic humans went to Heaven).

 Lucifer and Lilith both bonded, due to their experiences of being banished from Heaven and Eden respectfully. Lucifer was originally a light-bearing angel, and part of God’s inner circle. He looked very similar to his current appearance: white face, short white elegant hair, and pearly white teeth (not sharp fangs). Like the other archangels, he would make sure that everything was in order, that rules were followed, and that the formerly humans were having fun. He even helped make chains of flowers and daises (which now disgusts him).

Lucifer’s fall began one fateful day when God decided to give flawed humans a second chance. Now, instead of only heroic individuals granted access to Heaven, He welcomed ordinary people with open arms. What was even more bizarre, was the arrival of former humans now in animal-like forms and vivid colors: horses, dogs, lions, eagles, even mythical creatures. Appalled by the sudden changes, Lucifer claimed that those “inferior mortals” should not be granted access to paradise. God and the other archangels disagreed with him.

 Raphael was Lucifer’s opposite. Unlike him, Raphael was kindhearted and discouraged any form of pride. He took his role in service to God very seriously…and if that meant the creation of humanity, then he would still be loyal.

 It wasn’t long before Lucifer and the archangels Michael, Gabriel, etc. engaged in battle. Lucifer wasn’t alone: there was another angel named Azrael who was Lucifer’s friend and adviser. While Lucifer fought Raphael, Azarael clashed with Gabriel.

And of course, Michael battled Lucifer’s darker form, which had emerged from him after his anger was released. Michael used a flaming sword while the darker Lucifer used the same version of Lucifer’s weapon, the Morning Star. This darker Lucifer was quickly vanquished from Heaven and would later form Satan.

  Refusing to obey God, Lucifer, Azarael and the other rebel angels were cast from Heaven and banished to Hell as punishment. Azarael would later become a demon and a teacher of the dark arts in Hell.

 Lucifer is one of the few who knows the names of the robotic purge Angels of Death: Puriel, Kushiel, Teneluehus, Raguel, Wormwood, Jeheel, Zacheniel, Ababhar, and their leader, Abaddon. Originally regular angels sent to punish the souls of sinners, they were later modified into the ultimate killing machines. Sent down to Hell once every year, they slaughter the citizens at random to control the population and strike fear into those who oppose God. Lucifer, however, wasn’t afraid…he only wanted vengeance for his banishment.

 Instead of fearing his evil form…Lucifer embraced it. Testing out his newfound powers of destruction, he decided to take a position of power and rule as he saw fit. How did he do that? By murdering opponents and becoming the king of Hell. (However, he and Satan were different entities).

 The first king of Hell was Bael, who had the power to make himself and his army invisible. Paimon was the second king, teacher of science, the arts, and made great contributions in expanding Pentagram City. The third king, Beleth was ruthless and cruel to the lower class and even to his own subjects. He rode a black war horse made of dark flames. Beleth overthrew Paimon and Bael and became ruler before Lucifer arrived. Asnodi was a king of another circle of Hell, with the heads of a bull and a man. Vine was gender neutral and created storms using only their mind. Beleth defeated the seer kings Purson and Balam, the bull king Asnodi, and even Zagun, a ruler who could turn water into blood and oil. The remaining kings were under the authority of Beleth and Zagun.

 Eventually, Lucifer engaged in battle with Beleth and the kings…and won. He became the new ruler of Hell and the older kings were quickly forgotten. The apple was adapted into the architecture of the hotel and an apple was also prominently on Lucifer’s staff and white hat to show his status. This is reminiscent of the legend of Adam and Eve, and a way to remind both Lucifer and Lilith of their pasts. The couple also created purple snakes for decoration and defense, also related to the snake Satan, who had deceived Eve in the myth.

 Lucifer had fellow frenemies known as Astaroth (the dragon creator of self- doubt) and Beelzebub (a greedy wealthy Fly Lord). They made the Unholy Trinity and each agreed to rule different areas of Hell (though Lucifer was the most powerful of the three and was known by the majority of Hell).

 Lucifer then met the beautiful Lilith, with her long pale hair, graceful figure, and powers of her own. She had been Adam’s former wife and wanted to be equal to him instead of submissive. Lilith was kicked out of Eden and was given a choice: either reside in Hell or be forced to give birth to demonic offspring only for them to be killed each day. Lilith chose Hell and soon gave into her selfish ways.

 Her life changed when she met Lucifer. Here was an individual so similar to her. Emphasizing over their past lives, enjoying each other’s appearances, (add in a couple of drinks of heavy wine) and they soon gave birth to Princess Charlotte, also known simply as Charlie. Lilith and her husband were constantly busy with keeping up their status, interacting with other elite officials, etc. Lilith also worked as a model, becoming very influential.

  Charlie’s Childhood

 A loud screech echoed throughout the industrial hospital somewhere in Pentagram City. Lilith was lying down on a bed, shaking legs apart, sweat coating her forehead. Beside her was her husband Lucifer, who put a comforting clawed hand on her shoulder.

“Keep pushing, mon amour,” he encouraged. “It should be over very soon.”

“That’s what you said several hours ago,” Lilith countered, her face straining. “We were so close to making it back to our comfortable home, but then…”

She paused after catching her breath.

“…my water broke, and now we’re at this slum of a hospital instead. With these…things to keep us company.”

She looked at the busy imps nearby with disdain in her silvery eyes. One of them was busy administering medication into her lower back to ease the pain. Two others stood close to her legs, ready to deliver the child.

“My privacy invaded, just before my midnight photoshoot,” she muttered. “At least I haven’t changed into my nicest dress yet.”

She currently was wearing a crimson long red dress with black zebra-like stripes running diagonally down the front. Another dress was neatly folded in a nearby suitcase. She blew a strand of her long blonde hair away from her pale face. Her signature long red horns protruded from her head. Her black crown of thorns was nettled in her leather purse on a side chair.

Lucifer was wearing his traditional white and red dress suit with a black bow tie below his neck and fancy long white pants. A large white top hat nested over his blonde slicked back hair. A purple snake and a red apple were also on the hat. His cane had a matching red apple on the top. His skin was pale white, his eyes were yellow, and his cheeks were rosy off to the sides.

 Lilith sighed, already concerned with her upcoming tasks for the week. Besides modeling and negotiating with elite officials, she was a singer of a band called Resist. “When I’m done with this, I’m going to have to come up with another song for Resist. Maybe something called, “Angel Anarchy.” Or “Oppressive Heaven.” “Evil’ is ‘Live’, Backwards?” Should I do a haunting solo…or try for a metal scream?”

The contractions began again, and the demon mother wailed in pain for several minutes.

“Make it stop, make it stop, uuuughh…” she groaned.

Lucifer turned away slightly. He was used to hearing and seeing his opponents and victims writhe in pain, especially after his conquest of Hell many years ago.

But seeing his wife in pain like that…

“I’m going to be a father…I can’t believe it…”

“It is nice to have a greater purpose in life, besides just being rulers of Hell, don’t you think?” Lilith asked.

“I guess you’re right,” Lucifer answered. “When our child is old enough, he or she will be able to carry out our traditions and be a great ruler someday. I already picked out a boy name: Azarael, after my former friend in Heaven.”

“I don’t know,” Lilith countered. “It reminds me of those bastard angels too much.”

“Eldritch, then.” He suggested. “It means “old ruler.” Our last name means “fierce warrior.”

“Absolutely not,” Lilith argued. “What good would it be to have our child named after the last name of our rivals? How about a girl’s name instead? Something like…Vivienne! It means “alive.”

Lilith looked at him. “Have you looked into our ancestry books at the library again?”

“I have to find something to do when I’m bored,” he said. “Playing instruments is wonderful, but sometimes I need some ideas.”

Lucifer was still too embarrassed to admit that he was bad at playing the guitar and keyboard.

“Do these ideas involve rooms besides our grand library?”

Lucifer grinned and playfully winked. “Maybe they do.”

“Remember when we met at that concert for the first time?” Lilith asked, taking deep breaths, trying to ignore the lingering pain.

“Oh yes,” Lucifer said, nostalgia in his eyes. “I’ve never heard anyone sing as beautifully as you did that night.”

“And then we went to the Damnation Bar several days later after Krampus came along for the holidays?”

“Yep, I remember. Stupid old me got into a drinking contest with Beezelbub. You were drinking blood red wine and laughing your head off.”

“You did look pretty silly dancing on the countertop when you thought you had won the contest.” She let out a soft musical laugh.

Lucifer rolled his eyes. “But I did though! That Fly Lord cheated by flying around and gulping down several glasses in all six hands. I almost destroyed him, too, but the room was spinning too much.”

 Lilith smiled. “The best part was when you went through your drunken phase. You massacred a group of demons because you thought they worked for Jesus.”

“And we had tons of fun back at home,” he admitted.

“It was both pleasure-inducing and equal,” Lilith added. “Unlike my terrible first intimate encounter with that stubborn Adam. I did love being on top at the very end!”

“Ooookay,” said a nearby imp out loud. “I think I’ve heard enough for now. How about I check to see what’s going on in there…”

The imp male adjusted an emerging bald head and Lilith seethed. “You touch me like that again, and I’ll use your entrails for a necklace!”

“What’re you gonna do? Charge me for rape? I’m just lucky to have a job in general, but that doesn’t mean I have to enjoy it. Of all the snob patients I’ve worked with…”

A flick of Lucifer’s fingers caused the imp to explode in a mess of blood and organs. A dragon demon with a doctor’s coat peered in.

“Clean that up,” he mentioned to another imp with a mop and walked away. As the janitor imp did his work, a red-faced female imp arrived into the room. She peered over at the ultrasound.

 After half an hour, the contractions began again, this time, more intense.

  “NON, NON…MERDE!” she swore.  Lilith pushed long and hard, gripping onto the side of the bed.

Lucifer and the imps comforted her over her yells.

Then at last…the bald baby’s head emerged from between her legs, the head covered in blood. The placenta soon followed.

“It’s a girl!” announced the imp.

After the baby was cleaned, the imp placed the infant into Lilith’s arms. Lucifer and Lilith both cried with joy.

“She has your horns,” Lucifer said, watching as small red horns shot from her head, then retreated back in.

“And your face,” Lilith added.

Sure enough, the girl had the same rosy cheeks and pale face as her father. Stubs of white fangs were already peeking out from her gums.

“You know what?” Lilith asked. “I think I found the perfect name for her.”

“I think I do, too.”

“Charlotte,” they both said out loud.

“Congratulations, you too,” said the female imp, who began running some diagnostics. “Part angel, part demon,” she mentioned, after a DNA test.

“Very powerful indeed,” Lucifer said with satisfaction. “She will make a great Princess someday. Charlie the Great.”

 When the family got home, Lilith placed Charlie in a comfy crib in the upstairs room. Charlie wailed and cried, not wanting to go to sleep.

“I have an idea,” said Lucifer. He snapped his fingers.

Two small animated snakes soon hung above her crib. They spun in slow circles on a mobile. Charlie stared mesmerized, even reaching out a small hand to pet their lavender heads. Lilith opened a window where the screams of victims and the roars of fires could be heard. Lucifer’s haunting lullaby added to the dark ambience.

 “Rock-a-bye baby in the dark pit

When the corpses rot, the flames will be lit

Writhing in pain as life slips away

Never see again the bright light of day”

   Little Charlie was soon fast asleep.

Lilith gently kissed her daughter on her forehead. “Sweet nightmares, my darling.”

   Many years later, Lucifer was dragging a young Charlie over to a large room for her piano and music lessons.

“Daddy,” she cried, “I don’t wanna go!” The young girl was wearing a black skirt, a nice white shirt with a black bow tie and black tap dancing shoes. She clutched one of her demon dolls in her hand.

“It is important that you learn the proper techniques of playing and singing traditional songs.”

“But I wanna sing my own songs!” the child protested, her short curly blonde hair bouncing up and down.

“We can’t get what we want all the time,” said her father. “If you want to make a good impression on our people, then practice is the first step. Particularly at such a young age.

 Charlie pouted as she walked into an ornate room with a black grand piano in the center. Her music teacher was a plump woman with peacock feathers in her black hair, teal skin, and a dress of sequins.

 Her instructor led her through several songs. Charlie’s shaking fingers struggled to hit the right keys at the right time. She flinched every time she made a mistake.

 At one point, she got so frustrated, that she transformed into her demonic self and sang one of her songs in a fury. Standing up and spreading out her hands, she lifted up the grand piano and threw it into the air. The instrument landed on her music teacher with a large crash. The demon teacher gasped and then her body went still.

Charlie covered her mouth with her hands as a tense silence filled the space.

“Oh, I’m sorry…I didn’t mean it…I just didn’t want to play anymore…”

She glanced nervously at her father. But instead of anger, her father was crying tears of joy.

“Oh my dear Charlotte, I’m so proud of you! You did a splendid job.”

Feeling relieved, Charlie beamed and embraced her father.

 As the years went by, Charlie went through lessons on dining etiquette, manners, demonology history, music history, and politics.

   During one quiet day, a young Charlie frolicked in the brown grass, while bare trees reached for the beige polluted sky. She wore a dress of white and dull lavender, with a matching colored sunhat with a pink bow on her head. She smiled as she sat down on her knees. A bunch of small red daisies dotted the field and she picked them up one by one. She held a bundle of them in her hands and sniffed their sweet scent. She heard a familiar voice nearby.

“I never knew that natural beauty could exist in this place.”

Charlie turned to see her mother walk gracefully through the grass. Her corset-like dress was light brown down the front, with long white sleeves and a dark brown top covering her shoulders and neck. Black gloves covered her fidgeting hands. A brown sun hat with a black spider and web on top nestled over her long blonde hair.

Lilith knelt down beside her daughter in the grass.

“Isn’t it wonderful, Mommy?” the young girl asked. “A whole bunch of flowers here for us to enjoy. Most of the demons here don’t appreciate the small things in life.”

“That’s true,” Lilith replied.

A strange sadness appeared in her eyes, which were yellow with black sclera.

Charlie looked over. “What’s wrong, Mommy?”

“Oh, it’s nothing, Charlotte,” she replied.

“Do you think I’ll be able to make friends?” Charlie asked. “It seems like not many people want to be my friend. They don’t even care that I’m a so called princess.”

 Lilith tried to find a way to comfort her.

“Well, you’re always optimistic, positive in almost any situation. And you’re quite tough as well. No one has messed around with you.”

“Like Daddy, said, “don’t take any shit from demons.’ What shouldn’t I take from them, exactly?”

“Oh for Satan’s sake,” Lilith murmured.

“Huh?” Charlie asked.

“Nothing,” she said, waving a hand. “It just means be careful who you trust. Some may want to be your friend, but others are…wary. We’re the most influential family in Hell and we strive for chaotic order.”

“Meaning like having parties and singing songs and stuff?”

Lilith hesitated. “Well…yeah, if you wish.”

Charlie beamed. “Oh, that’s wonderful! I bet we will do a great job for our new friends. Thanks, mommy!”

Charlie embraced her mother and then ran around happily in the park.

There was no point in Lilith telling her what was really on her mind. That Hell was no place for happiness and innocent fun. That many demons feared their family and envied them.

That Charlie would always be powerful and different…

…being part angel and part demon…and never living a previous mortal life.  

 Souls Inside Monsters

“Charlotte, it’s almost time for the show to begin. Hurry on down!”

A young teen demon was sitting in front of a mirror decorated with yellow eyes with black pupils along the elegant rim. She put on a dash of red lipstick while her two goat dolls, Razzle and Dazzle fixed her hair.

 “Dad!” called the blond-haired princess from inside her room, “I told you to call me Charlie! Charlotte sounds too…strange.”

“Well that’s your name, you should be used to it by now.”

 Charlie rolled her eyes and stared at her reflection: golden yellow eyes, a ghost white face with red blushes off to the side of her cheeks, razor sharp fangs when she smiled. She was so excited, she could barely sit still.

 When her attendants were done, she stood up to admire herself and her outfit. A candy red pinstriped dress nearly touched the floor and felt slightly tight around her waist. An enchanted light purple snake was wrapped around her waistline, both serving as decoration and self-defense in case of grabby onlookers. It was very similar to the snake that her father Lucifer kept around his white top hat (though both were protective of their owners thanks to Lucifer’s magic). Spider web leggings covered her pale legs and on her feet were black tap-dancing shoes. One of her feet was already moving up and down slightly. Finally, Charlie wore a black spiked crown with a red apple gem in the center.

 “My 150th birthday!” she exclaimed, doing several happy jumps. “I’ve been waiting for this moment for a while.”

Indeed, it had been 150 years since she had been born in Hell to the king and queen. Unlike humans, the demons hardly aged at all, or if they did, it was a very slow process. (Then again, they were already dead, so it didn’t really matter.)

 But Charlie had heard of the interesting human tradition they called “birthdays” on Earth. She insisted to her parents they had to celebrate hers once a year.

 While Lucifer had been reluctant, Lilith agreed.

“We can’t participate in that foolish human tradition,” Lucifer argued. “Especially since we aren’t alive and our people are supposed to be suffering twenty four, seven.”

“If it makes our daughter happy, then so be it,” she said. “Besides, no one else has to know. It’ll be one of our traditions.”

“Very well,” he said. “But since Charlie gets a special day of her own, why don’t we make some days special for us…if you know what I mean.”

He gave her a devilish wink and she grinned in return. “A special day for domination…I’m up for that.”

Charlie had then entered the room, asking “What’re you talking about?” and the topic was changed.

“So, about that meeting with the other overlords?” Lilith asked her husband.

“As usual, I warned them they needed to know their place.”

Rolling her eyes, Charlie had left to play the grand piano.

 “Are you coming or not?” Lucifer asked, snapping her back to reality.

“I’m ready!” she called, opening the door.

There was her father in front of her, smiling his nearly ever-present grin. Like her, he had (much shorter) blond hair, a white face, blushes on his cheeks, and yellow eyes. He wore his usual white and candy red suit, with his white top hap with a snake along the rim. A black staff appeared in his hand with the Forbidden Fruit on the top: a red apple. Lilith walked over to stand beside him, wearing an elegant red dress and her usual black crown between her red horns on her head. She had blond hair even longer than Charlie’s and was taller than Lucifer.

“Oh Charlie,” exclaimed her mother in a soft voice, “You look so beautiful! You remind me of me when I was your age.”

 Charlie embraced her mother in a happy hug. “Come on, now,” Lilith said, letting go and beckoning her to come forward. “Our guests are waiting.”

 The “guests” were actually some of Lucifer’s snakes which he reluctantly enchanted to take on the appearances of…

 “Disney Princesses and Harry Potter wizards,” Lucifer muttered in disgust. “It could’ve been wounded demons sprawling in pain on the ground like in the past…”

 Charlie walked down the curving staircase down to the lobby of her family’s mansion. The “princesses” smiled and waved at her and some threw flower petals to her (which were actually dried scales dyed pink.)

 “You know how much she doesn’t like that,” Lilith mentioned. Charlie took the stage and began to sing.

 “But those enchantments aren’t even real,” he said. “It’s one of the ways to prepare her for her future duties as Hell’s princess.”

“And what’s the other way?”

Lucifer whispered into his wife’s ear and her eyes widened in both delight and hesitation.

“Oh that’s right. Today is also that day.”

“Surely she will enjoy getting a glimpse of what happens out in the world,” Lucifer smiled.

“But…what if it’s too much for her?”

“Too, much?” Lucifer asked. “She’s 150 now. She has to be ready. It’s a growing up right of passage that cannot wait any longer.”

 They watched Charlie take a bow as her doll demons clapped.

 “Trust me,” said Lucifer. “She’ll be delighted to witness her first…”

 “Cake!” Charlie squealed. “Oh my Satan, that’s amazing!”

 A devil’s food cake was rolled and set on a table in front of her. It had chocolate frosting (per her request), spidery snakes on the top and a fat red apple candle.

 After singing to her in their deep hellish voices saved for certain occasions, Charlie pointed her clawed finger at the candle and the flame shot into the air, bursting into red apple fireworks. The noise spooked the apparitions and the regular snakes appeared once more.

For the first half of the private party, Charlie entertained her parents by demonstrating her dancing skills up on stage. For Charlie, dancing wasn’t just a hobby: it was a way of life and a method to express her deepest feelings that she couldn’t put into words. Razzle played the grand piano and Dazzle played a violin as Charlie sang.

 As the day neared its end, the clock outside rang out twelve times. In the past years, Charlie would head upstairs to her room to watch musicals while her parents went outside for some “entertainment.” Now this time, Charlie would get a chance to be with her parents.

 “It’s a special surprise, sweetie,” said Lucifer. “Since it’s a big day for you, I’d like you to follow us.”

 He said it as if it were an order. Feeling bewildered, but still very excited, Charlie let her parents led her up the elevator and toward the uppermost balcony. Razzle and Dazzle followed close behind.

Soon, the group walked onto the balcony that overlooked the crimson sky and dark clouds of hell.

 Charlie stared out into the distance as the clock tower rang one last time.

 “I don’t see anything,” she said. “Are we waiting for fireworks? Or a rainbow?”

“Silly Charlotte,” said her mother with a smile. “You’re about to witness something even better than those things.”

 “A spectacle that you’ll gladly remember for years into your rule,” her father added.

 Charlie smiled wide, until seeing a speck of something in the distance. It looked like a circle of white light that slowly grew larger into the shape of a portal.

 “Huh?” she asked.

 Lucifer smiled. “Charlotte, welcome to your first Extermination.”

 Then…a swarm of dark flying creatures burst out of the portal. The shadowy figures rained down on the city below. Charlie looked closer and could see they had black feathery wings, dark curved horns and glowing white halos on their heads. Each one carried variations of spears, harpoons and other weapons in their hands.

 “What are those things?” she asked.

“They’re angels,” said her mother.

“Angels?” she asked. “You mean like the ones in human myths?”

“No, dear,” said Lucifer, his grin wide. “These are no myths.”

 All of a sudden, one flew close by and Charlie reeled back in fright. The angel that glided past had an LED mask on with a large sinister grin and an x over its right eye. The angel threw the spear in his hand, and the weapon struck a large parrot-like demon in the heart. The bird let out a shrill squawk as it plummeted to the ground.

Charlie glanced down at the streets and let out a sharp gasp.

 Down below, demons of all shapes and sizes scattered from the onslaught of angels descending on them like hungry vultures. A demon with three heads was unfortunate enough to have a harpoon struck through all his heads, causing the creature to collapse. Two other angels were choking a red dragon demon, the creature’s eye bulging. Two hellhounds whined in pain as electricity from another spear struck them both in the backs. The bipedal canines crashed to the ground and did not move again.

Nothing but screams, robotic laughter, and carnage. The longer she watched, the more frightened Charlie became. Soon, the rotten stench of death filled her nostrils.

She glanced back at her parents casually watching the show from their chairs like it was a musical.

Tears sprang from Charlie’s eyes.

“What is all this?! Why are you showing me this?”

“It’s a yearly extermination to reduce the population of sinners once a year,” explained Lilith. It was like she was talking about the weather.

“Those are our people!” she cried. “And you’re just letting this happen?!”

“There’s no need to act so brash,” Lucifer scolded. “It’s just a natural way of ensuring that evil gets a through cleansing.”

“Cleansing? This is murder!”

“Sadly, it’s a necessary act,” Lilith added.

“As you know, I was once an angel,” said Lucifer. “I was banished down here and nearly killed myself. But then God, the angels and myself came to an agreement. The Exterminators could kill citizens in Hell once every year, while we, the royal family, would be left alone. It does make sense, considering we are the most powerful individuals here.”

Charlie took several ragged breaths. “What’s so special about us? What about them?!” She pointed down toward the fleeing demons rushing into cars, stores, and even dumpsters to try and get away. Down over at the poor section of Imp City, the imps were even less lucky. The one ones who could escape were ones with enough proficiency to create small portals or to shapeshift into Exterminators to trick them.

 “This is Hell, Charlotte,” Lucifer said, eyes narrowing in frustration. “Suffering is what those lowlife scum deserve to experience. Just be lucky that we don’t have to deal with that.”

 “Vaggie,” Charlie breathed almost in a whisper, already concerned about her friend.

 “Now stop fooling around and embrace this momentous occasion,” said Lucifer.

 “No,” Charlie said.

“Excuse me?” asked Lucifer, eyebrows raised.

“NO!” she cried, tears running down her face. Her eyes turned red and her long horns emerged from her head. “I’m not gonna sit here and let more of my people die. I can’t believe you hid this from me all these years!”

 Charlie summoned Razzle and Dazzle and the two goats lifted her up and carried her down to the streets.

 “GET BACK HERE AT ONCE!” Lucifer bellowed.

Ignoring her father, Charlie landed down on the cracked asphalt, nearly stepping on a severed horned demon head. Razzle and Dazzle hovered nearby.

She saw three angels corner a frightened cat demon with a spotted brown face who held her paws up. Spears pointed toward her head and heart, the feline gave one last sorrowful meow.

“HEY!” Charlie bellowed in her demonic voice. She was seeing red. Her black shoes clacked against the pavement. “STAY AWAY FROM MY PEOPLE!”

The three angels turned at the same time, their eyes glowing red and teeth spread out when spotting her. The cat demon scurried up the wall with her claws and leaped from roof to roof out of sight.

 Flames receding from her body, horns shrinking back, Charlie backed up in fear and gulped as the angels advanced, their weapons at the ready. Razzle and Dazzle shuddered and held on tightly to Charlie’s hands. Just as the angels threw the spears and Charlie closed her eyes…

 She heard a sickening thud.

The spears had struck a pair of black fiery wings. The spears vanished in flames before flaming swords materialized out of thin air. The angels were struck by the swords, causing them to back up.

Lucifer’s eyes were red, his temporary black wings made from his enchanted snakes merged together.

“LEAVE.”

His demonic voice could stop the heartbeats of an entire group.

 Charlie slowly stood up once the angels had retreated and stared into Lucifer’s glowing red eyes. He slowly turned his head toward her. Though he was furious with her, she could see a small tear roll down his cheek before being evaporated by the heat.

“IF YOU EVER DO SOMETHING FOOLISH LIKE THAT AGAIN, I’LL MAKE SURE YOU NEVER LEAVE OUR MANSION. YOU WILL BE GROUNDED UNTIL THIS PLACE FREEZES OVER. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?”

Charlie nodded with a whimper.

“YOU WILL ACCEPT YOUR ROLE WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT.”

 Charlie glanced over toward a group of demons and gasped. As her father raised his hand toward her, something inside Charlie stirred. A peculiar feeling in her temple, just between her eyes began to tingle with warmth. It was almost as if time stood still.

 When Charlie stared hard at the three homeless demons from a distance, she could almost see their faces briefly morph into their formerly human ones from their past lives: a white skinned bearded man with a bottle of alcohol in his hand, a mother with a cut-up face in torn prostitute clothing, a sobbing blonde boy in the mother’s lap just learning how to use a gun…

 Before Charlie could say anything, a glowing magenta pentagram surrounded her and she was transported back to her room with Razzle and Dazzle.

  In high school, Charlie met Vaggie, a moth demon who would soon become her best friend, and girlfriend. Vaggie was frequently bullied by the other demon kids, but Charlie’s demon form was enough to get them to back off.

“Hi, I’m Charlie!” the princess said, bubbly.

“I’m Vaggie,” the young girl said shyly. Vaggie had long white hair and a pink ‘X’ over her left eye. Her overall appearance was goth-like. Her sclera was light pink and she wore a white mini-dress. Her left stocking had pink stripes while her right stocking was navy blue. There was even a pink bow in her hair. The two friends grew closer as time went on. Vaggie even gathered the courage to share how she died one Halloween night.

“It was back in 2014,” she said. “I was a regular Latino human who was fascinated by bugs and the supernatural. Punching asshole guys and slicing their nuts off was super fun. You know, black guys and white guys insulting my culture and all, I just wasn’t having it.”

She continued. “People thought I was weird, but I didn’t give a fuck. I was in love with this cute girl in my class, but this guy who claimed he was my boyfriend didn’t like that. He kept calling me a butch bitch and wouldn’t leave me alone. One night, on my way home from a punk rock concert, he appeared behind me and slammed me against the wall. He tore off my bra, pulled down my pants and…”

Her breath caught in her throat. Tears fell from her eyes. “His friends were standing there too…they just laughed at my naked form. He went into me over and over, and over again!”

She buried her face in her hands, as Charlie held her tightly.

“I’m so sorry, Vaggie,” she said quietly.

“Not only that,” she stuttered between sobs, “he stabbed me here…”

She pointed to her left eye,

“…and here…”

She mentioned to her breasts…

“…and finally set the rest of me on fire.”

 Charlie was crying too, sharing her friend’s pain. “I can’t imagine what’s that’s like. To go through that…and being a human…”

“Well, I’m not a human anymore,” she said, wiping away her tears. “I’m a demon stuck in this hellhole. There’s a good reason I don’t trust men…I never trusted them when I was alive. Don’t even get me started on my abusive father.”

Charlie sat and listened, providing a source of comfort for her friend.

   That’s Entertainment: present day

 Both of Charlie’s parents envisioned their daughter as an asset to the family business. She was the princess of a hotel and they hoped that by encouraging demons to remain in fear and respect of their family, that no conflicts would arise.

 But then, Charlie proposed something radical, unexpected…and even dangerous. She wanted to create the Happy Hotel as a place for sinners to redeem themselves. Lucifer thought it was a joke at first. Charlie had laughed and explained her plan.

 “Isn’t it brilliant?” she asked, a smile on her face. She stood in the living room of their elegant home. “This could be the solution we need that could benefit everyone.”

Her father was not amused and her mother was skeptical.

“How would running a hotel cause the demons to change so fast?” he asked. “Your plan is impractical and downright ridiculous.”

“What makes you think this idea will work?” asked Lilith.

“Glad you asked,” said Charlie. She cleared her throat, opened her mouth wide and stood on a table.

Lucifer held up a hand.

“No singing necessary.”

Charlie let out a sigh and hoped down. “If the demons could become good people who give up their bad habits, just think how much better this world would be. Heaven wouldn’t need to exterminate the population year after year. Crime rates would drop, gambling and drugs would become afterthoughts. Who knows? Maybe those reformed enough could leave to live better afterlives!”

“Leave?!” asked Lucifer. “You do realize that demons were sent here for a reason. If they were to change their ways, then our economy and society would crumble. Even worse, there would be revolts, riots.”

Charlie stared with curiosity. “What’s bad about that?”

“It’d put our family and legacy at risk!” Lucifer replied. “Our livelihood depends on preserving tradition and establishing a chaotic order, if you will.”

“Our legacy could change for the better,” Charlie countered. “No more killings and despair for everyone. You may not think that anyone cares about purges, but I know that there are families out there who have lost beloved members due to those purges.”

“Me and the other demons do care about the purges,” Lucifer stated. “Which is why it would only get worse if demons decided to change.”

Lilith put a comforting hand on her daughter’s shoulder. “Charlotte, I understand that you’re trying hard to do what’s best for Hell. I, too, wish things could have been different. Unfortunately, things are the way they are. It can’t be helped. Why make matters worse to begin with?”

 Tears started to fall from Charlie’s’ golden eyes. “Why aren’t you guys listening to me?”

She pulled away. “If all of us want better lives here free from killings…”

She pointed to her drawing of the Happy Hotel on a piece of paper,

“…then this is the only way to make it happen.”

Lucifer crossed his arms, his eyes glowing red. “You will, under no circumstances, open that hotel.”

Charlie’s fangs grew slightly longer. “I have to try!”

Lilith sighed softly, looking back and forth as her family members argued.

Charlie took several deep breaths and placed her hand over her heart. “I know there’s good in every demon here. They just need to be reminded of their potentials, their purposes.”

“The purpose of demons,” said Lucifer with a glare, “is to suffer in damnation forever. None of them can be redeemed, that’s just who they are. The sooner you realize that, the better.”

Charlie groaned out loud in frustration. “I refuse to believe that!”

Lucifer sighed. “I know I can’t change your beliefs, but I’m still in charge. As king, I forbid you to…”

“La la la! Can’t hear you!” Charlie called, covering her ears.

“Now you’re just being childish,” said Lilith. “I’d send you to your room, but you’re 117 years old.”

“I feel like I’m 17 instead.”

“Age doesn’t matter,” said Lucifer. “Our legacy does, however. I will not allow you to drag it through the mud.”

“Then I’ll just create a new one!” said Charlie. Anger flooded her head and spread through her arms. Sparks of electricity danced around her clawed fingers. Charlie backed up from the living room and entered a long hallway. Her father followed.

Lilith stepped back and cussed under her breath. She knew a fight was coming on, and it was never pretty.

Charlie summoned balls of fire from her palms. Lucifer summoned his staff into his hand, a long black one with a red apple on top. The fireballs shot from Charlie’s hands but her father made them vanish on the spot with a wave of his hand. Charlie jumped into the air, ready to attack. Using his staff, Lucifer created a hole that dropped Charlie to a farther spot down the hall.

 “I hate portals,” Charlie muttered.

 Closing her eyes, Charlie conjured a flaming unicorn and hopped onto its back.

“For cupcakes and rainbows!” she shouted as she galloped forward toward her father.

“Enough of this!” he yelled. He shot a band of red energy at the unicorn, destroying it. Charlie tumbled to the ground, and then righted herself. Her entire body was then engulfed in flames, her black horns growing from her head. A volley of flames spread from her in every direction, breaking several windows and nearby vases. One painting depicting humans being thrown into a lake of lava crumbled to ash.

Lilith came into the room and gasped. “Charlotte!” she scolded. “That painting cost 240 souls to purchase!”

Ignoring her mother, Charlie danced around, avoiding her father’s attacks. “I’m sticking with my idea!”

Lucifer held out his hand, and a glowing red pentagram appeared on the floor under Charlie’s feet. Charlie jumped into the air, only for her to be surrounded by a web of neon red vines. Charlie’s fire from her body could not burn away the sharp vines restraining her.

“Father…let go!” she yelled.

Lucifer walled over to her, slowly. “Be grateful that you are my daughter,” he said. “If you were anyone else who had questioned me…”

“Lucifer,” warned Lilith from behind.

“Listen well, Charlotte, because I won’t say this again. If you know what’s good for you, you will give up on your idea and start behaving like an adult.”

“But I am an adult!” Charlie protested, no longer struggling. “And I’ve decided as princess to continue on with opening the hotel. It will be what’s best for us.”

The vines around her tightened.

Flames sparked in Lucifer’s eyes. “If you think causing a war is what’s best for us, then you are gravely mistaken. I had high hopes for you all these years. But now…you’re nothing but a failure.”

Charlie stared in newfound shock, eyes wide. She felt a stabbing pain inside her that had nothing to do with the vines.

 Failure.

Failure.

Failure.

That was all she ever seemed to be in her father’s eyes.

 She thought back to her rivals, Helsa and Katie Killjoy. Helsa was a woman with gray skin and octopus tentacles for hair. She had been Charlie’s rival since they were little.

“You and your family are an utter disgrace,” she had said, flaunting her pink fur jacket, dark skirt and high heeled boots. “You’re a naïve fool with such airheaded ideas. How I’d love to see you humiliated and my family reach the top.”

 And then there was Katie Killjoy, who was potentially even worse. Homophobic and self-centered, she cared only about her appearance and good ratings on the news.

“You call yourself a princess,” she had scoffed, blowing a cigarette, “but you’re scum, just like everyone else.”

 Charlie willed for her memories to go away. Since the beginning, Charlie had felt like an outsider. It wasn’t just because of her friendlier personality in comparison to those around her. It was also due to the fact that she was the only one born in Hell…everyone else had lived past lives on Earth or Heaven.

 Lilith stepped forward and destroyed the vines with a wave of her hand. Everyone took shaking breaths and became silent for a moment. Charlie’s horns retracted back into her head, and the flames dwindled and disappeared around her body. Charlie was free and she promptly stomped away, head lowered.

Lucifer spoke in a booming voice that echoed throughout the room. “We will come back to this!”

“Charlotte, do not go outside yet!” Lilith warned before Charlie was out of sight.

 Charlie stared out the window into the crimson sky of Hell. Lilith was right to be concerned about the outside world. To Charlie’s horror, the purge was underway. Robotic angels with sinister smiles and red Xs for eyes swooped down and stabbed any demon that they could find. They were immune to demonic magic, as shown when one green eel-like demon tried in vain to push back an angel with his magic. One stab to the eel’s chest brought the monster to the ground, lifeless. In the shadows, one demon with thick dark gray hair like a lion, plucked an abandoned spear from a fallen demon. Another demon in a lab coat took notes on a clipboard. The feline-demon walked with the weapon proudly, considering selling it on the black market for a huge price. Passerby ignored the imp demons who began feasting on the bodied body.

Charlie let out a yelp as something went flying toward her. A bat demon was thrown hard against the window and its body slid down the glass pane before falling. Dark blood was left behind, streams flowing down like thick raindrops.  An angel of death slowly turned its head toward Charlie. She gasped in fright, moving out of sight with her back against the wall.

 She wished that her girlfriend Vaggie were with her to comfort her. She had met the emo-like, misandrist woman back when they were very young. They were childhood friends whose friendship developed into something deeper. Complementary opposites, Vaggie’s no-nonsense personality kept Charlie grounded in reality…sometimes.  

 Charlie often wondered…could there be a better place for demons? Heaven was inaccessible and only for the elite and those who met strict qualifications. Hell was overpopulated with people…some were evil for sure…but others just made mistakes.

Those lucky enough to forego Heaven and Hell went to a limbo place where there was dark nothingness…at least that what her father claimed after eavesdropping on humans during his fall to Hell.

 Could that really be it? If the angels were to kill everyone, would the victims just cease to exist? Would those formerly lost humans serve no purpose other than suffering in their afterlives?

 She tried to imagine what mortals might be feeling. She didn’t know very much, but she figured that they had the same desires as herself.

 “Should I really keep going? Should I try to provide more opportunities for the people here? What if I really am a failure?”

 It seemed like forever, but eventually, a deathly silence announced that the purge had ended. The numbers below a clock tower read 365 days until the next purge. Charlie slowly walked outside onto a balcony. She couldn’t bring herself to look at the carnage down below.

Among the broken weapons and corpses, “fuck you, heaven!” was written in red on a nearby wall. “Cleanse!” was scribbled on posters of an angel of death. Up in the sky, a lone planet with a pentagram loomed overhead. More signs displayed advertisements, porn, drugs, and drinks. In one area, a figure of a demonic woman in promiscuous clothing posed next to a sign that read “Porn Studios.” In a shadier part of town, large red signs read “punishment,” and “your days are numbered.” A demon with the head of a bull picked up a fallen head from the ground and loaded it into his shopping cart of other heads. Casino signs flashed in the darkness and faint music pounded from strip clubs.

Tears fell freely from Charlie’s yellow eyes. Her long blond hair fluttered in the breeze. She wore a black bow tie, black suspenders, and a white shirt under her pink tuxedo.

Charlie lifted her finger into the air and colorful fireworks boomed in the sky.

Feeling free to express herself, the demon princess sang her lament.

 “At the end of the rainbow, there’s happiness

And to find it, how often I’ve tried

But my life is a race

Just a wild goose chase

And my dreams have all been denied”

 “A ray of hope in this world of black

I wish the world to be free of sin

But no matter hard I try

I can’t get by

I never seem to win”

  “Why have I always been a failure?

What can the reason be?

I wonder if the world’s to blame

I wonder if it could be me”

 “I’m always chasing rainbows

Watching clouds drifting by

My schemes are just like my dreams

Ending in the sky”

 “Some fellows look and find the sunshine

I always look and find the rain

Some fellows make a winning sometimes

I never even make the game

Believe me”

 “Will this world be a better place?

Or will loss never go away?

The choices I face, me, a disgrace

Loss of hope here to stay”

  “I’m always chasing rainbows

Watching clouds drifting by

My schemes are just like my dreams

Ending in the sky”

  “I’m always chasing rainbows

Waiting to find a little bluebird

In vain.”

   Not too far away from Charlie’s location, a slender female demon wearing a black dress, opened up red curtains and watched the fireworks in the sky. Toward the back was an overlord demon wearing a black top hat with a skull on it. His face was stormy gray and his four eyes were yellow. He casually sipped from a red goblet. Behind him was a shadowy figure of a cyclops woman…and Lucifer sitting on a chair, holding his cane.

 At Valentino’s Porn Studios, a demon named Vox with a TV head and a woman with dark violet hair posed for a selfie. The woman, Velvet, grinned and checked her phone. Valentino, the head of the company, was elaborately dressed in a fur coat with hearts, wore pink heart-shaped sunglasses and a dark pink top hat. He tapped his clawed finger impatiently as he glanced down at the messages.

 Valentino: Did you get my money, Angie baby?

Angel Dust: I’m wittha John now. I don’t get why this needed to happen so soon after the extermination tho. Boss.

Valentino: Just do it. No sass. K sugar.

Angel Dust: Yes, Val.

 Down below, a demon with a mane of hair proudly took a discarded weapon and left to sell it on the black market. An emotionless woman in a lab coat walked around with a clipboard, taking notes. Imps with top hats began to feast on the bloodied corpse in the street. Up above, a woman wearing a pink hat with feathers and skulls crossed out the word “Franklin” on the sign “Franklin and Rosie Emporium.”

  TURF WARS

 The time on the grand clock read 5:07, and down below, the next cleanse would occur in 365 days. A small blue demon fell down to the ground with a yell, a cloud of dust rising in the air. The demon had four arms and large red eyes. He touched his face and body, clearly relieved.

“Oh, I’m alive. I’m alive!” he exclaimed.

Immediately, he was run over by a speeding car, exploding in a flash of blood.

The car stopped on a road, where a Jackpot Hotel and Casino stood in the background.

A tall, white demon walked out of the car and rested his elbow on the top of the door. He slicked back the hair on his head with one of his pink gloved hands. Being a spider demon, he had multiple arms. He wore a black bow tie, tall stiletto boots, and a shirt with pink and white stripes. His irises were pink, the sclera in his left eye dark instead of white. Pink dots resembling small eyes were lined up below his eyes.

 “Thanks for the fun time, hot stuff,” said the driver.

The white demon closed the door. “Yeah, yeah, listen. Keep this discreet, hear me? I can’t let it get out I’m offering my services to randos on the street. It was a quick cash grab, ya got that?”

Travis, the dark owl demon scoffed. He wore a black hat and both his eyes were red. One eye had black sclera.

“Whatever you say, slut!” he mocked with a laugh.

The white demon cupped his face dramatically. “Ouch, ooh, such an insult!”

Travis stared nervously, a small heart in his left eye.

The white demon leaned in, showing a mouth full of fangs. “Let me know when you come up with something creative to call me, you sack of poorly packed horse shit.”

He poked Travis in the face with one hand, and grabbed his collar by one of his other hands.

“Tell the missus I said hi,” he added before giving Travis a quick kiss.

“Schnookums. She’s not coming back. Pack of poor…” Travis muttered, rolling up his window and speeding off. The car squealed and flipped over on its side in the air, falling with a loud crash.

 The white demon glanced over at a nearby store. A sign advertising a casino with a pack of cards on the front read, “Casino: just a few wins away.” Beside an elevator, was a fridge with an upside down cross on the front. A vending machine with the word “drugs” on it in white letters, caught the demon’s attention. Giddy with excitement, he walked over and glanced down at the options:

 Coke

Bojack

McWeedies420

Squip

Hero-in

Krunchy Krokodil

Angel Dust

  The demon pressed “Angel Dust” and a white sack fell to the bottom. With a greedy smile, he took it in his hand. Coincidentally, Angel Dust was also his name.

With a yoink, a small gray imp demon snatched the bag from Angel’s hands.

“Hey!” Angel called angrily.

“Up yours, drag show!” he taunted, before being crushed to death by a boulder.

“Oh my god!” Angel cried in terror, racing to the scene.

But it wasn’t the fallen thief he was concerned about.

“My drugs! Damn it!” he cursed, picking up a piece of the sack.

  Overhead were neon signs on top of buildings. One in yellow letters read “Begg Slut” and another one in teal: “I couldn’t think of a pun for our shop but we sell hard drugs!”

  Angel turned around and spotted a flying metal aircraft, which was firing lasers at buildings. It looked like an industrial rocket ship made with gears and a steampunk style to it. A metal hook hung from the bottom of it. The lasers struck the buildings, which caused bright pink explosions to fill the air.

From inside the ship, a serpent overlord stood high above over the controls, laughing manically. Down below, his deviled egg minions stood and watched. Each of them wore black top hats and pinstriped round clothing. They were called Egg Bois.

The room had deep purple walls, cabinets for the minions and decorations of their leader along the wall.

The overlord was Sir. Pentious. He wore a gray coat with yellow vertical stripes down the front. He had a black tail with yellow stripes and pink eyes all over. He wore a top hat with a moving pink eye and a grinning mouth of fangs. He sprouted a demonic grin of his own, his hood also full of several pink eyes.

 Up on the platform, he oriented two levers in his hands, the control button in the center displaying a pentagram design.

“Those other cowardly sinners dare not hinder my territorial takeover! A wise decision. The power of my machines are unmatched! No other demon can compare to the likes of I!”

One egg minion with #23 on his back added, “Gee that was pretty swell boss!”

“Yeah!” another chimed in: #666.

“You really showed them what for!” called a third.

Another minion teasingly ran his fingers up the overlord’s spine. “I like it when you shot them with your ray gun…”

Sir Pentious punched a minion out the window and whirled around in anger. The other minions backed up. “I wish he’d shoot me with his ray gun,” a minion whispered, head lowered.

Sir Pentious rolled his eyes at his masochist minions. He turned back to the controls and grinned. Pentagram circles revealed the areas he had taken over and the other territories ahead. “At this rate, I will seize control of the entire west side of the Pentagram by day’s end!”

He laughed and bragged some more. “And nothing, not a single beast in this inferno of suffering, will be able to take back this empire from my constrictive grasp!”

As to prove his point, he grabbed a minion in his tail and tightly squeezed him.

Another minion blew a noisemaker and then popped open a blue bottle of a brown drink. The overlord threw the minion across the room as the eggs celebrated down below.

“Hell will be mine,” he declared, “and everybody will know the name of Sir Pe…”

“Edgelord!” yelled a voice.

“Pardon?!” Sir Pentious shot back in shock. “Who said that?!”

He leaned in close to two of his minions, not pleased.

“What did you just say to me, you fried chicken fetuses?!”

The minions shook in fear.

“Speak up!” he hissed.

“It wasn’t us, mister boss man!” said a minion.

 Just then, an object shot through the glass at the front, creating a small hole. A small pink bomb with a black skull on the front, landed on the floor. Sir Pentious observed it for a moment…the bomb looked like a cherry…which could only mean…

The bomb exploded, covering the room in sparkles and thick red smoke.

Sir Pentious coughed and swiped some of the smoke away.

“You looking for a fight, old man?” a female voice challenged.

Sir Pentious spotted his rival standing proud and casually catching another bomb in her hand: Cherry Bomb.

Towering tall in pink high heel boots, ripped black jeans, a pink crop top with an x on the front, long strawberry blonde hair, a single pink eye with an x that took up most of her white face…a grin of sharp teeth…it was her alright.

“Why don’t you get that tinker toy bullshit off my turf before I smash it…” she declared before catching her bomb. A random barbell of metal crashed into the floor close to Cherri Bomb.

“…more.”

“Oh, you wanna go, missy?” Sir Pentious retorted. He flicked his hood back before opening it. Well, I’m happy to oblige!”

He let out another evil laugh as his minions closed in, holding stun guns, which crackled with yellow electricity.

But Cherri Bomb wasn’t scared. With graceful leaps, she avoided the blasts and threw down another bomb. She used the cover to escape, jumping down and swinging once from the anchor at the bottom of the flying craft. Landing gracefully on the ground, she continued her assault from below.

“Catch me if you can, snake man!”

“Get her!” he bellowed through the red smoke, the eggs quickly running around in a frenzy.

 The minions jumped to the ground after her, the overlord following suit. Cherri Bomb dodged a blast, grinned and picked up the minion egg. She spun around and threw the minion straight into Sir Pentious’ face. He threw the egg back at her, and she caught it with one hand.

“Thanks for the gift!” she called out, before cracking the egg open with an evil grin. She placed a bomb into it, then threw it back at him...straight to his face. Sir Pentious could only make a face of surprise before the egg blew up in pink smoke.

“Why you little…”

Cherri Bomb ducked as another egg sailed over her head.

 Just then, a familiar drug-addict white demon stomped on an egg minion and threw a grenade in the distance.

“Angel Dust!” called Cherri Bomb, happy to have her partner in crime arrive.

“Great to see you too, sweetie!” he teased.

Another pink explosion filled the air as the fight continued.

“Hey, thanks for the backup, Angie!” Cherri Bomb said as she fired a flaming red arrow with a large gun over toward Sir Pentious.

Angel Dust laughed, leaning against volcanic rock as cover. He threw a grenade over his head.

“You kiddin’? This is the best action I’ve seen in ages!”

A pink explosion rocked the streets.

“Where have you been anyway?” she asked. “I thought you up and died or some shit.”

“I wish,” he remarked as he lit another fuse and handed the bomb to his ally. She threw it forward, then ducked behind the rock next to Angel.

Angel continued, “I’ve been staying at this crappy hotel on the other side of town. Some boards are lettin’ me stay rent-free if I play nice.” They covered their ears.

A column of green smoke rose into the air with a fiery whoosh. The duo leaped over the rock and charged at the army of egg minions. Using four arms, Angel Dust fired rapidly from a gun at the minions, making some of them explode.

He sighed, and used one of his hands to gesture. “Y’know, no fights, no pranks, no “problematic language.” Her words, not mine.”

He tripped an unsuspecting minion, sending him into the air and exploding in a yellow yok mess. He waved a spiked club and continued firing his gun. A pot shop stood in the background, with marijuana leaves near the sign.

“These bitches are no fun!” Angel complained in frustration. Splatters of yok landed on his head and face. “I’ve been clean for two weeks!”

“Holy shit!” Cherri Bomb yelled after avoiding a green explosion and leaping into the air.

Angel scooped up yok with his finger. “Well, sorta clean.” He smashed apart another egg minion with his club. “As clean as you can get with a shitload of Bolivian marching powder.”

Angel’s shadowy silhouette displayed sharp fangs as Cherri posed in the background, one of her boots missing. A sign read “50% off meth” above a small super market.

A black chain wrapped tightly around Angel’s waist and chest, sending him flying backwards. Cherri Bomb gasped as her ally was pulled away. Sir Pentious threw the chained Angel Dust hard onto the ground a distance away. He landed with a thud against volcanic rock.

“Oh, harder daddy!” Angel teased with a wide smirk.

Sir Pentious gasped, eyes tearing up. “Son?!”

Angel Dust stared blankly, one eye raised, a look of disbelief on his face.

Cherri Bomb rushed into action, landing a sharp kick to Sir Pentious’ back. The villain landed on the ground, then hissed threateningly.

“You whores have no class!” he exclaimed. “In war, the side remembered is the side with the most…style.” He straightened his black bowtie with a spring.

Cherri Bomb broke open an egg and tossed the shells aside. Angel stood up, freeing himself from the chains.

“Or the side that ain’t dead,” she added.

“Speaking of style, is your hat like, alive or something’?

Sir Pentious hissed. “Oh, well, that’s none of your goddamn business, now is it?”

Angel continued, “Would that make your hat the top and you the bottom?”

He and Cherri burst into laughter. Even a pink “loser” sign pointed at the oblivious villain. “Ooooh,” said a minion near him. “One hellish burn.”

“I’m going to blow you to bits!” Sir Pentious yelled, pointing at them.

“Hmm! Kinky!” Angel teased.

An advertisement displaying a plate of, sausage, eggs and a tomato slice stood halfway buried in the ground. A glowing pink sign pointing down read “pussy.” Another yellow sign read, “Sex here.”

“I’m not like that! Pervert!” yelled the villain. Cherri Bomb and Angel Dust held in laughter.

Angel suddenly pushed Cherri Bomb out of the way, as an egg minion shot tendrils of claws from behind them. The claws had eyes in the center and grabbed onto Angel’s four wrists. He struggled to free himself, the cords stretching.

Sir Pentious chuckled. “Not so cocky now, are we?”

“Y’know, you really need to watch what’s coming out of your mouth,” Angel remarked. “Cocky…cumming, you get it?”

The villain didn’t respond.

Angel sighed. “I’ve been making these sex jokes the whole time!”

A drill poked out from the ground, Angel avoiding it. A minion held a drill in his small hands at Angel. Two extra arms popped out from Angel’s body, holding his rifle.

“And it’s obvious you ain’t catching on.”

He cocked his gun. “I mean, it’s just sad!”

He jumped into the air, freeing himself and firing the gun. The laser hit Sir Pentious, and his gray top hat fell off.

Cherri Bomb popped up next to Angel. “So, think you’re gonna get into a lot of trouble for this?”

“Eh, what’s one little brawl gonna cause?” He shrugged his shoulders and retracted his extra arms. Sir Pentious lay fuming on the ground.

More egg minions scrambled over to the edge of a high cliff, overlooking the scene. Egg shells and yok puddles littered the cracked street.

Cherri Bomb playfully elbowed Angel. “Glad ya haven’t changed. You know you’re my favorite guy to party with!”

“You know it, sugar tits,” Angel replied.

“You ready to finish this?” she asked. She rolled a bomb from one of her shoulders to her other shoulder, then into her hand.

Angel cocked his gun again. “Born ready, baby!”

The duo charged at Sir Pentious. Everyone yelled. More egg minions fell and Sir Pentious realized he was running out fast.

 After several more minutes of battle, Sir Pentious and his remaining minions retreated back to his ship. “This isn’t over, sluts!” he declared at his enemies. “I’ll have my revenge!” The ship hatch closed. The egg minions steered the ship and it rose into the air, almost sending the overlord flying out of the craft. He tossed out more minions in response before taking the controls and flying the craft away.

Angel and Cherri Bomb high-fived.

“See you around,” she said.

“Until the next brawl,” said Angel.

Cherri Bomb waved goodbye and blasted music from an Eye Pod (a device made from an actual moving eye. “Hello, daddy. Hello mom. I’m your ch-ch-ch-cherry bomb! Hello world! I’m your wild girl. I’m your ch-ch-ch-cherry bomb!” she sang out loud. Angel Dust laughed and continued on his way.

After buying some more amino and pot from the 666 Shop, Angel met with Charlie and Vaggie in a white monster limo. A great day indeed for the promiscuous demon.

  The Happy Hotel Interview

  Transcript during the 666 News:

“BREAKING NEWS: A LARGE SCALE TURF WAR IS UNDERWAY IN PENTAGRAM CITY BETWEEN SIR PENTIOUS AND CHERRI BOMB. THE SURROUNDING AREAS ARE COVERED IN DEBRIS, SO PLEASE AVOID DOWNTOWN ON YOUR COMMUTE TODAY. TRAFFIC IS “HELLA” BACKED UP. GET IT? “HELL” BUT WITH AN “A” AT THE END? THAT’S A WORD YOUNGER PEOPLE SEEM TO ENJOY USING. I DON’T REALLY LIKE IT, THOUGH. I WROTE IT BECAUSE IT SEEMED LIKE THE NATURAL KIND OF PUN TO MAKE FOR THIS SITUATION, BUT NOW THAT I SEE IT IN TEXT, I FEEL LIKE IT WAS A MISTAKE, A MISTAKE I CAN’T TAKE BACK…LIKE CHEATING ON MY WIFE. I’M SO SORRY, MARTHA. I SHOULDN’T HAVE DONE IT, BUT YOU DID GAIN A LOT OF WEIGHT AFTER THE BABY AND I REALLY NEEDED SOME SPACE. YOU KNOW, WHAT? NO, THAT WAS A GOOD CALL. I BANGED THE CLEANING LADY, AND THAT WAS A PRETTY NICE TIME, EVEN THOUGH SHE LAUGHED AT ME WHEN I TOLD HER I COULDN’T GET OFF UNLESS SHE LICKED MY FOOT FIRST. I DON’T SEE HOW THAT’S A WEIRD REQUEST. MAYBE IF I’D JUST GET A HOOKER, SHE WOULD’VE BEEN MORE AGREEABLE. THE POINT IS, MY WIFE IS A FUCKING BITCH. ONE TIME, WE WENT TO THE ZOO AND I GOT REALLY MAD BECAUSE I THOUGHT THE ORANGUTAN WAS MAKING FUN OF ME. HE KEPT DOING THAT STUPID DUCK LIP FACE? THEIR LIPS ALL PUCKERED? THEN IT STARTED SCREAMING, AND THAT REALLY PISSED ME OFF. MY WIFE TOLD ME IT WAS JUST A MONKEY, AND TO “CALM DOWN.”

 A neon logo appeared on the screen, displaying “666 News” in a circle with a neon eye underneath. The names of the news cast appeared on the bottom of the screen.

A skeletal demon woman with short blonde hair and a large toothy grin stood wearing a pink dress and a pearl necklace. Sitting at the other chair, dressed in a blue business suit was a demon with a gray gas mask for his face along with short white hair. They were live on the air.

 “Good afternoon!” said the woman. “I’m Katie Killjoy.”

“And I’m Tom Trench,” said the man. “Chaos at Pentagram City today as a turf war is raging on the west side between notable king Sir Pentious and self-proclaimed spunky powerhouse Cherri Bomb!”

Two pictures surrounded by flame borders showed Sir Pentious wearing a yellow “music band” shirt, doing a peace sign and wearing his top hat as a baseball cap with a dopey expression on his face. The other picture showed Cherri Bomb flipping the bird and standing under glittering spotlights.

“That’s right Tom!” Katie added. “After the recent extermination, many areas are now up for grabs! Demons all over Hell are already duking it out to gain new territory!”

The clips showed Sir Pentious fighting Cherri Bomb with his egg minions.

“Those two seem to really be going at it, huh? Looks like they’re fighting tooth and nail for that hot spot!” Katie popped a tooth and a nail into her mouth.

“And I’d sure like to nail her hot spot!” Tom Trench said with a chuckle.

Katie giggled forcefully. “You are a limp dick jackass, Tom. Or should I say…”

Adding insult and injury, she poured her hot coffee over his crotch…

“No dick!”

“Augh! Not again!” he groaned.

Another picture surrounded by a border of flames displayed Charlie with the letters “Princess of Hell” next to it.

Katie continued. “Coming up next, we have an exclusive interview with the daughter of Hell’s own head honcho, who’s here to discuss her brand new passion-project!”

Tom Trench winced in pain on the desk.

“All that and more after the break!”

She broke her mug in her hand, and turned to Tom Trench. “Suck it up you little bi…”

The TV went off air, displaying Katie’s mouth and eyes, colored bars and “off air” with a pentagram in the “O”.

  Inside the break room, Vaggie adjusted Charlie’s black bowtie. Nearby, a red tinted sign said that smoking was, indeed, allowed. Another sign read “on air,” in large letters.

“Okay, you remember what to say?” Vaggie asked.

Charlie took a deep breath, enthusiasm in her voice. “Yes! Let’s do this!”

Vaggie put a comforting hand on her shoulder. She signaled with two fingers for her to pay attention. “Just, look at me and I’ll mouth it to you.”

Charlie sighed. “Come on, Vaggie! I know what to say!”

She walked over to the pitcher of red punch. “I just feel like we need to…I don’t know, make things sound more exciting…”

She tossed a donut aside before gasping.

“Oh! What if I…”

“Sing a song about it?” Vaggie finished.

“You knew I was gonna say that.” She playfully tapped her friend on the nose.

Vaggie adjusted Charlie’s bowtie again and shook her shoulders. “Because I know you. But please don’t sing. This is serious.”

Charlie snapped her fingers and briefly winked. “Well, you know, I’m better at expressing myself through song!” She stood on the table and arched her arm dramatically. Down below, Charlie’s doll demons Razzle and Dazzle chewed on donuts.

“But life isn’t a musical, hon,” Vaggie reminded her.

“Fine,” Charlie said with a slump. Then she brightened again.

“But I do have these other ideas of what to say.”

She got off the table and pulled out a piece of paper, hopping excitedly. “The highlighted bits are my favorite parts!”

Vaggie took the paper and scanned it in disbelief. “Uh, it’s all highlighted. Is this a drawing?”

“Yes!” Charlie answered. She pointed to her picture. It showed a list that read: “4, unicorn kisses,” “5, dolphin high-fives?” and “6, sing show tunes = happy ending!” She drew stick figures of demons standing on clouds under a rainbow with a sun and red hearts with faces on them.

“That’s the happy ending, see? Everyone’s smiling and happy in Heaven!”

“I don’t think it’s that simple,” Vaggie stated. She then begged her: “Just please follow the talking points we went over.”

She pulled Charlie close and stared her directly in the eyes. “And do. Not. Sing.”

Charlie sighed exasperatedly. “Fine.” Then she trotted over and spoke in an accent. “I’ll just have to resort to my impeccable improve skills.” She gave a salute, several moves of her head and went outside.

Vaggie somehow knew that this would not be going well.

Charlie walked over to Katie Killjoy, who posed in her red dress, smoking a cigarette.

“Hi! I’m Charlie.”

She waved and held out her hand.

“Katie Killjoy,” the woman deadpanned before blowing out smoke and snapping her cigarette. “I’d say it’s a pleasure to meet you, but that would be a lie. You can put that away,” she regarded Charlie’s hand. “I don’t touch the gays. I have standards.”

“Yeah?” Charlie asked nervously, looking at a big flashing sign that read “Hell’s #1 News!” “How’s uh…how’s that working for ya?”

“Look, my time is money, so I’ll keep this short,” Katie cut in. She invasively tapped Charlie’s chest and nose with her finger. “We’re not here because we wanted you here. You’re here because Jeffry couldn’t make it for his cannibal cooking segment.”

Katie mentioned to a billboard that showed a tall man with glasses, short blonde hair with a white chef’s hat, a red apron, red suit, red horns, and a red devil’s tail. He held a platter of poop, skulls, and raw meat in his hands. Above it read “It’s Dahn Good! Cooking show: Guarantee Cannibalicious!” “Who approved this show?” was written on a sticky note tapped to the corner of the advertisement. Tom Trench shook his head in his seat. “Sex! Murder! Weather!” were displayed on a column three smaller signs.

Katie fluffed her hair, swayed her hips, and continued: “You might be some royal bigshot, but that doesn’t mean shit to me. I’m too rich and too influential to give a flying fuck about what some tux-wearing demon “princess” wants to advertise.”

“But I…” Charlie began.

“So don’t get cute with me, honey,” she warned, getting into Charlie’s face, “Or I will fucking bury you!”

“And we’re live!” said a voice.

Katie rushed back into her seat with a bony crack of her neck.

“Welcome back!”

Charlie sat in a chair next to her.

“So, Charlotte…”

“It’s Charlie,” she squeaked.

“Whatever,” Katie dismissed. She took a frustrated breath and clicked her red pen in her hand. “Tell us about this new passion project you’ve been insistently pestering our news station about!”

“Well…” Charlie cleared her throat. She looked nervously at the demonic crew in front of her. Vox, a demon with a TV head, had “words” flashed across the screen in angry red letters. There was a guy with a black top hat for a face, an Egyptian-like female with a white poodle, a woman with teal skin, a demon with glasses and green snake hair, a demon with two thin heads, several red horned demons and a few overlords. Another woman wore a hat with hanging beads and colorful Day of the Dead makeup on her face. Vaggie encouraged her to go on.

Charlie took a deep breath.

“As most of you know, I was born here in Hell, and growing up, I’ve always tried to see the good in everything around me.”

Katie clicked her pen impatiently. She spotted a green caterpillar and stabbed it with her pen with a predatory grin. Ink splattered on Charlie’s face and around the area.

Charlie continued, wiping off the dark pink ink from her face: “Hell is my home and you are my people. We…”

Vaggie gave her a thumbs up and a smile.

“…we just went through another extermination. We lost so many souls, and it breaks my heart to see my people being slaughtered every year. And no one is even given a chance!”

Charlie banged her fist on the desk, waking Katie from a bored drooling daze. A buff demon with horns and four eyes with a skull bull face wore a shirt with the word “crew” on it. An imp with a heart on his forehead stood nearby.

Charlie made her way forward. “I can’t stand idly by while the place I live is subjected to such violence! So, I’ve been thinking. Isn’t there a more humane way to hinder overpopulation here in Hell? Perhaps we can create an alternative way to change souls through…redemption?”

Charlie pulled the buff demon into a side hug. “Well, I think yes. So that’s what this project aims to achieve!” She ran back to the desk.

“Ladies and gentlemen, I’m opening the first of its kind! A hotel that rehabilitates sinners!”

 The audience stared in stunned silence. Not even the flesh-eating crickets were chirping through the awkward quiet.

 A bloodstained logo “Radio Hack” was displayed above a window which provided a stack of dozens of TVs inside. One demon watching had deer antlers and a flaming blue face, one of the many cruel overlords. Crymini, the 90’s hellhound, stood with a little demon wearing a jester hat upside down. Two hellhound twins stood nearby, one with dyed red hair, the other purple. A neon sign nearby read “Bar” “Klub Kanji,” and “used TVs.”

In a bar, dark demons wearing cowboy hats were playing pool, not even paying attention. The lead demon wore a cloth over his grinning face and had a large barrel gun for an arm. His friend looked like a demonic bug, and another looked like a mustached villain from an old film. Meanwhile in a bar, purple and blue dragon-like demons sat and drank while casually watching the TVs overhead.

Charlie stuttered, “Ya know…’Cause hotels are for people passing through…temporarily…”

A tattooed dark blue reptile demon stood up and let out a loud laugh.

“Is this girl for real? She thinks, you hear what she thinks? She…heh, heh, heh, oh she’s nuts.” The demon walked away with a small lavender creature and a tall maroon being wearing punk rock clothing and crazy neon hair.

Charlie added, “I figure it would serve a purpose…a place work toward redemption!” She weakly added, “Yay.”

 One demon leaped away as a tall shadowy figure stood in the background…

The figure stood right next to a ratted flier which read “Beware him! Do not fuck with him!” “The Radio Demon” was scrawled in white on demons screaming and fleeing from a monster with antlers overhead.

The man smiled and tilted his head a notch as he watched the TV with curiosity and amusement. His shadow next to him briefly morphed into a shadowy face with antlers on top. He spotted the fliers out of the corner of his red eyes, holding in a laugh.

“Who, me? ‘Obviously’ not! I’d never put on a show and make other demons flee to their graves.”

Just the thought of it got him excited.

 He had heard of the demon princess before, but he wasn’t expecting her to appear on TV. He certainly never heard of an idea so crazy before. Making sinners good people was even less likely than making pigs fly (which was one magic trick he could do on occasion).

When Charlie started to sing, the red eyed demon couldn’t help but tap his cloven feet and silently hum along.

“Haven’t been this entertained since I broadcasted my massacre of the ninth circle city. This pretty Charlie character is intriguing…”

 Befriending the princess, and doing something different seemed like a good idea. He glanced over at a faraway Happy Hotel building.

He knew where he would go next.

  Back at the news station, a cameraman with blue hair and a white face looked up and scoffed, “Stupid bitch.”

Vaggie punched him hard in the face in response, causing him to fall off the chair to the ground.

Charlie stared around her, concerned. “Look, every single one of you has something good deep down inside. I know you do.”

A light bulb went off into her head. “Maybe I’m not getting through to you…”

Vaggie face palmed, knowing what was coming next. “Oh no…”

Charlie snapped her fingers and her bodyguard demons appeared. One sat and began to play a grand piano.

 Summoning the Disney princess within her, Charlie belted out her song:

  “I have a dream

I’m here to tell

About a wonderful, fantastic new hotel

Yes, it’s one of a kind

Right here in Hell

Catering to a specific clientele”

 Razzle and Dazzle howled along…

The tempo rapidly picked up…

 “Inside of every demon is a rainbow

Inside every sinner is a shiny smile

Inside of every creepy hatchet-wielding maniac

Is a jolly, happy cupcake-loving child”

 “We can turn around

They’ll be heaven-bound!

With just a little time

Down at the Happy Hotel!”

 “So all you junkies, freaks and weirdos

Creepers, fuck-ups, crooks, and zeroes

And the fallen superheroes, help is here!

All of you cretins, sluts and losers

Sexual deviants and boozers

And prescription drug abusers

Need not fear

Forever again

We’ll cure your sin

We’ll make you well

You’ll feel so swell

Right here in Hell at the Happy Hotel!”

  “There’ll be no more fire

And no more screams

Just puppy dog kisses, and cotton candy dreams

And puffy-wuffy clouds

You’re gonna be like, wow!

Once you check in with me!”

 “So all your cartoon porn addictions

Vegan rants, psychic predictions

Ancient Roman crucifixions

End right here!”

 “All you monsters, thieves and crazies

Cannibals and crying babies

Frothing mouthers full of rabies

Fill with cheer!”

 “You’ll be complete!

It’ll be so neat!

Our service can’t be beat!

You’ll be on easy street! (Yes!)

Life will be sweet at the Happy Hotel!

Yeah!”

  Throughout the song, Charlie imagined giving a shiny cupcake to a masked killer, holding cotton candy and a brown puppy in her arms in the clouds…avoiding the attacks of every horror movie serial killer… (Music Logic)

She pictured throwing drugs into a bin of fire, giving shots to monsters, giving money to charity, disturbing porn additions with a bra…

Snatching a “My waifu” porn mag of out a demon’s hands…

Throwing away demon’s cell phones…

Knocking over crosses…

Avoiding a scary spider overlord with yellow bat wings and pink eyes all over his body…

Giving demons big hugs…

 Charlie emerging in her horned demon form from a flaming pentagram, and jumping with joy in a land full of candy, rainbows, and ice cream.

  Charlie finished with a pose on the table, arms in the air and panted.

The top hat demon smiled. “Wow! That was…shit!”

 The crowd burst into rancorous laughter and boos, including a blue demon made of fire in the boo section. Katie shrieked and banged her fist on the table.

“What in the nine circle of Hell makes you think a single denizen of Hell would give two shits about becoming a better person? You have no proof that this little experiment even works! You want people to be good just…because?”

Charlie lifted up her head. “Well, we have a patron already who believes in our cause, and he’s shown incredible progress!”

“Oh?” Katie asked, leaning in, “…and who might that be?”

“Oh just someone named…Angel Dust.”

“The porn star?” asked Tom Trench in disbelief. He subconsciously unzipped his zipper and Katie whirled on him; “You fucking would, Tom!” Her sharp nails left marks on the table.

Katie turned back to Charlie. “In any case, that’s not even an accomplishment. I’m sure you can get that hooker to do anything with enough booger sugar and lube.”

Someone wolf-whistled in the audience.

“Oh, I beg to differ,” Charlie argued, holding up her fingers. “He’s been behaved, clean, and out of trouble for two weeks now.”

 “Breaking news!” announced a voice as music came on. Excited, Katie pushed Charlie aside. “We are receiving word that a new player has entered the ongoing turf war! Let’s go to the live feed!”

To Charlie’s sheer horror, Angel Dust was seen on screen, crushing egg shells and fighting with Cherri Bomb.

“Oh shit,” she breathed.

“Oh shit indeed!” exclaimed Katie with a grin. “It looks like the one who has just joined the battle is none other than…”

She let out a dramatic gasp…”porn actor Angel Dust! What a juicy coincidence!”

The screen showed Angel Dust with the words “Angel Dust in ‘Well, Ok’: 18+.”

Satisfied, she turned back to Charlie. “You must feel really stupid right now.” Katie and Tom laughed again.

“Ratings!” Katie and Tom added with jazz hands.

“Don’t look at this!” Charlie called, waving her arms in vain from behind the screen.

“Well, it sure looks like your little project is dead on arrival. Tell us, how does it feel to be such a total failure?”

 Failure. Failure…Charlie could see her doubt reflected in Katie’s pink eyes and overbearing shadowy figure. Katie and everyone laughed some more, their jeers painful to Charlie’s ears.

“Yeah?” Charlie asked. She snatched up Katie’s red pen and held it triumphantly. “Well, how does it feel that I got your pen, huh? Bitch!”

Katie glared dangerously. Charlie dropped the pen with a nervous smile, “Oops.”

Katie grew taller, her form turning to shadow. Out sprouted claws, four extra sharp appendages, and four red eyes on her face like a spider. She launched herself at Charlie. Charlie pulled her hair and landed punches as the alarm went off in the news room. Katie crawled on the desk in all legs, baring her fangs before Charlie jumped at her and knocked her off the table. Tom Trench got so distressed that his entire body burst into flames.

Charlie ran out of the news room, Katie following her close behind, as everyone yelled.

“And stay out, you retarded dike!” Katie cussed as Charlie made a run for it down the sidewalk. Charlie was tempted to strangle the homophobic, news diva with her bare hands…but that would only contradict her goal…if she even had one anymore.

 Vaggie followed her and the two of them didn’t say a word as they waited for their ride. Soon enough, a white limo with a monster mouth on the front of the vehicle rolled to the curb. Vaggie and Charlie climbed in…and so did an ecstatic Angel Dust. The doors closed and they drove off toward the Happy Hotel.

 Car Ride to the Hotel

 Charlie had never felt so humiliated in her life. She sat in her seat and curled into herself. Once again, her ideas were dismissed, mocked, ridiculed. No one was willing to see the good in themselves. The demons were content to wallow in suffering, violence, and cruelty until the end of their afterlives. Tears were already threatening to spill from her yellow eyes, but she held them in.

Maybe her father was right. What if she really was a failure, like everyone said?

As if reading her mind, Vaggie gave her a small hug next to her. “You’re not a failure, Charlie. It’s just…no one understands your ideas. People think they’re…I don’t know…outlandish?”

She got a sad sigh from Charlie in response. “I just wanted to make things better for my people. I know I don’t feel much like a princess, but at the same time…I feel like it’s my duty…my destiny to being some cheer to this place.”

“Heh. No one can ever top your optimism,” Vaggie mentioned, with a playful roll of her eyes. “Your happiness can be spotted miles away.”

A small smile formed on Charlie’s face. “Well, at least I can pull myself up and keep going…”

Vaggie stared, hopeful…

“…But today isn’t one of those days.”

Vaggie slumped slightly. “I did warn you not to sing.”

“I couldn’t help it,” she countered. “How else was I supposed to get my message across?”

“Not everyone likes singing and music all the time.”

“My family does.”

“But the other demons aren’t your family.”

 Charlie stared out the window at the buildings whizzing by. “Sometimes I feel like my family is bigger than just my parents.” She turned to look at her girlfriend. “You’re my best friend, sorta like my older sister…and the only one who seems to get me. You’re part of my family already.”

Vaggie chuckled softly. “Without me, you wouldn’t have lasted very long out in the big world.”

“For once, I agree with you there,” Charlie replied.

During several minutes of silence, the two demon girls locked hands just out of sight. It was their habitual way of showing comfort, and it worked on the many days when Vaggie didn’t want any hugs.

“Don’t get too discouraged,” Vaggie said. “We’ll get back to the hotel and figure things out from there.”

“I kinda feel like singing another lament now.”

“Please don’t.”

“Fine.”

 The limo drove past the 666 Shop, the Nightmare Night Club, and an Evil Donuts store, complete with slime and worms displayed on the donut structure. Pink eyes decorated the ceiling of the car. Charlie curled into herself again, and took a puff of a breath. Even the painted eyes seemed to judge her every move. She glanced over at Vaggie, whose eye was twitching in annoyance.

Angel Dust was busy playing with the button, making the car window go up and down, up and down. He froze when he saw an angry Vaggie staring at him.

“What?” he asked with a shrug.

“What? What?!” Vaggie shouted, pulling out chunks of her long white hair. “What were you doing?!”

Angel sighed. “I owed my girl buddy a solid! Isn’t that a “redeeming quality?” Helping friends with stuff?”

“Not with turf wars that result in territorial genocide!”

“Eh, you win some, you lose a few hundred,” he said with a snicker. “It wasn’t that bad anyway.”

He propped up his long legs and pushed the window button again. Vaggie tossed a dagger at the button and it fizzed out in a shower of sparks. Angel stared, shocked and terrified. Vaggie growled in warning.

“Aw come on, I had to!” Angel protested. “My credibility was on the line!” He sighed. “I mean what kind of reputation would I have of people found out I was trying to go clean? It just throws out my entire persona.” He lifted up his furry chest.

“Your credibility?” Vaggie asked in anger. “What about the hotel? Your little stunt made us look like a fucking joke!”

“No, no no, babe. Jokes are funny! I made you look…uh, sad. And pathetic! Uh…oh with progeria!” Charlie covered her face with her hair as Angel blabbered on.

“Great! Now I’m bummed thinking about it! This thing have any liquor?” He bent down to the floor and tossed a bottle aside. He then flicked a wrapper away onto a seat.

Vaggie was fuming. “Can you please just try to take this seriously?”

“Fine, I’ll try. Just don’t get your taco in a twist, baby.”

“Was that you trying to be sexist or racist?”

“Whatever pisses you off more. Is there seriously no liquor in here?”

“I’m gonna kill him,” Vaggie swore, crossing her arms and sitting back down.

“Too, late, toots. Wait, would that make me double dead?” He laughed slowly and loudly. “And where exactly do I go to, double Hell?”

He laughed again. “Sorry, you’re stuck with me, bitch. Get used to it.”

Vaggie swore in Spanish (“Son of a rabies bitch”)

“Listen, who cares if some jagoffs got hurt?” Angel nonchalantly asked. “Most of them are ugly freaks. Look around! Got a bunch of fuckin’ harlequin babies down there.”

“You’re one to talk,” Vaggie muttered.

Angel laughed then yelled “Hey!” in protest. “This body is flawless! Everyone wants some of me and I’ve got the creepy fan letters to prove it!”

He pulled out a dirty piece of paper from his enlarged furry chest that read: “Show me your feet! Bryrin. #1 fan/critic.” There was a picture of a young angel in the lap of a naked man, licking Angel with his green tongue. He had a tattoo of Angel with a red crossed out sign.

This time, Charlie spoke up. “That was really uncool, y’know, Angel.”

Vaggie growled and turned to her friend. “Uncool?!” She mentioned to Angel. “After that train-wreck, there is no way anyone is gonna wanna stay at the hotel. All thanks to you and your selfish bullshit!”

Angel glanced at a discarded pile of ash and used cigarettes. “Does this mean I don’t get a free room anymore?”

Vaggie spread out her hands as if asking “Well, what do you think?”

He let out a mock sigh. “Ah, well, shucks.”

Charlie pulled off her dark pink shirt, revealing a white shirt with a black bowtie.

“Hey, come on, we don’t know if things are over yet. Try to relax, Vaggie. It’ll be okay!”

Now it was Vaggie’s turn to let out a small smile of thanks. Charlie placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, and her friend calmed down.

“What would I do without you?” Vaggie asked. She and Charlie slowly leaned into each other, their heads gently touching.

“Get a room, girls!” Angel remarked, before receiving a “Shut up!” from both of them.

 Finally, the deviant crew arrived at the Happy Hotel. It was an elegant building fit for any demon who wanted to stay a few nights. Eye designs lined the border of a dark pink canopy at the front like a creepy mosaic. Branches jutted out from the roof as part of the structure. Old fashioned lanterns attached to the wall had flames flickering inside, nonstop. The double doors consisted of stained glass windows with red apples in the center. Little stained glass snake eyes peered unblinkingly at them from around the larger window in the door.

 Angel, Vaggie, and Charlie got out of the car and threw open the double doors. A random black bug scurried away from the incoming light. A yellow sign read “Concierge” behind a pink “welcome” banner. The check in table was decorated with colored flags leaning toward the floor and random balloons with small star shapes on them. A vase was decorated with yellow eyes along the sides. Another flower pot was in the shape of a human mouth…white flowers posed above. Vaggie sighed and plopped onto a red cushioned couch in the style of a monster’s mouth.

The red rug down the hallway was decorated with the same eyeball designs, apples on the end, plus shadow skulls of horned monsters in the center.

All around the room, were pictures of Charlie as a little girl with her father and mother on various trips.

 Angel Dust came across a red fridge leaning low against the wall. He opened the door and pulled out a purple box labeled “Popsies.” He shrugged at the dripping ruined box and took out a popsicle. He gave it a lick, talking with his mouth full.

“It’s prolly a good idea to get some actual food in this place. Y’know, to feed all the wayward souls ya got in here.” He laughed nervously, trying to cheer Charlie up. But Charlie just sat sadly on a wooden box in a darkened area of the room. Angel closed the fridge door, sucked on a popsicle and reached out one of his arms to her…then hesitated. He walked away, letting her have some alone time.

Charlie walked past the two posing elephant statues balancing balls on their trunks, and toward the front door. She opened the door and went outside. Holding out her purple cell phone, (or “Hell Phone, hah, get it?”) she pressed an icon with the word “Mom” decorated with a heart and horns on the m’s.

Charlie took a deep breath as a voicemail tone came through.

“Hey Mom. Um, I know I keep calling, and you must be busy. Really busy. But, um…the interview didn’t go well and…I don’t know if I’m going to make a difference. I don’t know what I’m doing. I could really use some advice, Mom.”

She slid down and sat on the stone ground, tears falling from her eyes. “I think Dad was right about me. A-anyway, I’ll stop talking before this gets long. Love you! Bye.”

She ended the call with a tap and rubbed her eyes with her hand. Standing back up, she opened the door, closed it, and leaned against the stained glass window, eyes closed.

  Enter Alastor (and Sir Pentious)

 A slow ominous knocking from outside interrupted Charlie’s thoughts. She opened her eyes. It was a rhythmic knock, sounding like “shave and a haircut.” (Or was it “skunks in a barnyard”, or “imps in a cauldron?” She wasn’t sure.

   An ice cold feeling of dread spread through her veins. No other demon would ever do that kind of knock.

 Unless…

 She tentatively reached out her hand to the door handle, and quickly pulled it open.

 Sure enough, the most feared demon in Hell was standing right outside her door.

He towered over her, wearing dark red dress pants, a red dress shirt along with a dark red pinstriped coat underneath. His shoes were black with red hoof prints on the sides. The two black lines in the center of his dress shirt looked like an upside down cross.

Charlie slowly looked up at his red knotted bowtie, then to his thin gray face. His beaming smile displayed yellow sharp teeth and took up much of his face. On his head were red and black tuffs of hair and fur that resembled deer ears. There were even two small black antlers coming from his head. His sclera and eyes were crimson red, with an oval shaped monocle over his right eye. He carried a magical cane which resembled a vintage microphone.

 Charlie’s face morphed into sheer terror, eyes wide as saucers.

Eyes glowing red, the man began to speak.

“Hell…”

She slammed the door in his face.

Opened the door…

“…o.”

Slammed it again.

  Alastor stood, shocked in front of the stained glass door, smile still plastered on his face, hand and curved claw in the air.

 “Well… that was…rude,” he thought. “Usually people are too sacred to answer when I come by. Or they rush to try and please me because they know I could slaughter them at any time. I’ll just wait here then…or maybe break this door down…”

  “Hey, Vaggie?” Charlie called.

“What?” Vaggie replied in annoyance.

Charlie flashed a nervous smile. “The Radio Demon is at the door!”

“What?!” she demanded.

“Uh, who?” Angel asked. He sucked erotically on his popsicle.

“What should I do?” she asked, pulling at her lower eyelids.

“Well, don’t let him in!” said Vaggie.

 Charlie was tempted to do just that. But she also had a duty to not leave any sinners behind. She took a breath and opened the door again.

“May I speak now?” the demon asked.

“You may…” Charlie replied.

  The man held out his gloved hand. “Alastor, pleasure to be meeting you, sweetheart, quite a pleasure.”

He eagerly grabbed her wrist and leaned his face close to hers before strutting inside. Charlie stood, dumbfounded, her hand still out.

“Excuse my sudden visit,” he went on, “but I saw your fiasco on a picture show and I just couldn’t resist. What a performance! Why I haven’t been that entertained since the stock market crash of 1929!”

He bobbed his head side to side and burst into laughter. “So many orphans!”

Vaggie suddenly pointed a spear weapon at him. “Stop right there!” She swore in Spanish under her breath: “Carbon hijo de perra! (Son of a bitch!) I know your game. And I’m not gonna let you hurt anyone here, you pompous, cheesy, talk show shitlord!”

Angel peeked around the corner to see what was going on.

Alastor merely laughed slightly and nudged the weapon away with his fingers.

“Dear, if I wanted to hurt anyone here…”

He added in a low creepy tone, “I would have done so already.”

His red eyes briefly turned to red radio dials and radio static filled the room. He tilted his head slightly, letting his chaotic magic roam. Vaggie and Charlie were frozen in fear as they caught glimpses of red Voodoo symbols, static, and warped reality.

Then just as quickly, the noise and magic ceased and Alastor shook his head, eyes back to full red.

“No, I’m here because I want to help!” He bowed.

Charlie was sure she hadn’t heard him right.

“Say what now?” she asked, eyebrows raised.

“Help!” he responded with another laugh. He held up his microphone staff. “Hello? Is this thing on? Testing, testing…”

He tapped it and a glowing red eye appeared in the center. “Well, I heard you loud and clear!” the microphone responded, eye shaking in fear.

“Um…you want to help?” Charlie asked.

 Alastor appeared behind the demon girls, hands on their backs, switching from a shadow to his regular self. Both Vaggie and Charlie flinched.

“With…” he mentioned in an imitation of Charlie’s voice,

“…this ridiculous thing you’re trying to do!” finishing in his normal voice. “This hotel!”

Charlie could hear the call bell ding twice on the table, even though no one was there to ring it.

“I want to help you run it.”

“Uh…why?” Charlie asked, confused.

Alastor laughed again. “Why does anyone do anything? Sheer absolute boredom! I’ve lacked inspiration for decades!”

He placed his elbow on an annoyed Vaggie’s head. Then shoved her aside.

“My work became mundane, lacking focus, aimless! I’ve come to crave a new form of entertainment!”

He laughed again.

Charlie looked downcast. “Does getting into a fist fight with a reporter count as entertainment?”

“It’s the purest kind, my dear! Reality! True passion! After all, the world is a stage! And the stage is a world of entertainment!”

Charlie brightened a bit. “So, does this mean that you think it’s possible to rehabilitate a demon?”

Alastor help up a hand and laughed. “Of course not. That’s wacky nonsense! Redemption, oh the non-existent humanity! Nononono, I don’t think there’s anything left that could save such loathsome sinners! The chance given was the life they lived before; the punishment is this! He spread out his arms. “There is no undoing what is done!”

“So then, why do you want to help me if you don’t believe in my cause?” Charlie asked.

Alastor smirked and looked at Charlie over his shoulder. “Consider it an investment in ongoing entertainment for myself!” He pulled her close to him with his arm and twirled her around in a quick dance. “I want to watch the scum of the world struggle to climb up the hill of betterment! Only to repeatedly trip and tumble down to the fiery pit of failure.”

“Right…” Charlie began, slowly removing his clawed hand from her shoulder.

Alastor took her aside for a walk. “Yes indeedy! I see big things coming your way, and who better to help than I.”

 “Ah, so uh, what’s the deal with Smiles over there?” Angel asked Vaggie.

“Wait, you’ve never heard of him before?” Vaggie asked. “You’ve been here longer than me!”

Angel shrugged his shoulders.

“The Radio Demon, one of the most powerful beings Hell has ever seen?”

“Eh, not big on politics,” he replied.

Vaggie, annoyed, leaned in close to explain.

“Decades ago, Alastor manifested in Hell, seemingly overnight. He began to topple overlords who had been dominant for centuries. That kind of raw power has never been harnessed by a mortal soul before. Then, he broadcast his carnage all throughout Hell, just so everyone could witness his ability. Sinners started calling him The Radio Demon. (As lazy as that is). Many have speculated what unimaginable force enabled him to rival our world’s most ancient and destructive evils. But one thing’s for sure: He’s an unpredictable source of danger, a wicked spirit of mystery, and a violent monster of chaos, the likes of which we can’t risk getting involved with unless we want to end up erased.”

“Ya done?” Angel asked with a snicker. “He looks like a strawberry pimp!”

“Well, I don’t trust him!” Vaggie argued.

To be fair, do you trust any man? Any men? Men?” Angel asked with a slight laugh.

Vaggie ignored him and walked up to her friend.

“Charlie, listen to me. You just can’t believe this creep! He isn’t just a happy face! He’s a dealmaker, pure evil! He can’t be redeemed! And is most likely looking for a way to destroy everything we’re trying to do.”

“I…” Charlie began. “…we don’t know that. Look…I know he’s bad, and I know he probably doesn’t wanna change, but the whole point of this is to give people a chance! To have faith things will be better! How can I turn someone away? I can’t. It goes against everything I’m trying to do. Everything I believe in.”

Alastor stared in fascination at a family picture on the wall. It showed Lucifer dressed in white, Lilith in a dark purple dress, and Charlie as a little girl wearing a brown and white dress in the middle. The picture border consisted of branches and yellow eyeballs and a dried rose in the upper right hand corner.

 “Such a lovely portrait! A picture of perfection! It’d be such a shame if something awful were to happen to them…”

 “Just trust me,” Charlie added placing comforting hands on her girlfriend’s shoulders, “I can take care of myself.”

Charlie,” warned Vaggie, “Whatever you do, do not make a deal with him!”

From a distance, Alastor opened up the palm of one hand, claws curled inward. Both girls glanced in his direction, worry on their faces.

 “I’ll have these two in the palm of my hand…”

 “Don’t worry, Charlie replied to Vaggie. “I picked up one thing from my Dad…” she spoke in a manly voice, “Ya don’t take shit from other demons!”

Gathering her courage, Charlie marched over to the Radio Demon.

“Ok, so…Al. You’re sketchy as fuck, and you clearly see what I’m trying to do here is a joke. But I don’t.”

Red Voodoo symbols appeared around Alastor, then vanished.

Charlie continued. “I think everyone deserves a chance to prove they can be better. So, I’m taking your offer to help. On the condition that there be no tricks or voodoo strings attached.”

Alastor twirled his cane and held out his hand. “So it’s a deal then?”

Flashes of eerie green light surrounded him, electricity snaking up the walls.

“Nope!” Charlie yelled, holding out her hands. The energy stopped. “No shaking! No deals! I…hmm…”

Charlie decided to try another approach.

“As princess of Hell, and heir to the throne, I uh, hereby order that you help with this hotel, for a long as you desire.”

A moment of pause…

“Sound fair?” she asked.

“Fair enough. Cool beans.” Alastor shrugged, walking on and making his cane disappear. Charlie breathed a sigh of relief and even did a thumbs up.

Alastor stopped and spotted Vaggie off to the side. He smirked in a way outside observers would describe as lecherous. He tickled her under her chin with a finger.

“Smile, my dear! You know you’re never fully dressed without one!”

Alastor hummed happily on his way, while Vaggie growled in disgust and rage.

“So…where is your hotel staff?” Alastor asked.

“Uh, well…” Charlie began. Alastor peered at Vaggie through his monocle. “Oh ho ho ho, you’re going to need more than that.”

He walked over towards Angel.

“And what can you do, my effeminate fellow?”

Angel grinned. “I can suck your dick!”

“Ha! No.” Alastor deadpanned.

“Your loss,” Angel said with a slight laugh. Alastor summoned his cane.

“Well, this just won’t do!” Alastor exclaimed. “I suppose I can cash in a few favors to liven things up!”

 The spell came easily in his mind: “dife sèvitè, reveye.”

  He snapped his fingers and a fire sparked to life in a small circular fireplace. Animal skeletons decorated either side of the wall.

A dark figure plopped down onto the chimney floor.

Alastor walked over and picked up the creature with his hand. A large single yellow eye was revealed. Angel, Vaggie, and Charlie peered at the creature. In a puff of smoke and a squeak, the creature revealed herself. A cute cyclops girl was wearing a pink dress with a poodle on the front, her short wide hair dark magenta with a streak of yellow.

“This little darling is Niffty!” Alastor introduced, before dropping her. She landed on her feet.

“Hi! I’m Niffty!” she greeted with a wave. “It’s nice to meet you! It’s been a while since I’ve made new friends!” She laughed slightly and her pupil grew smaller, darting in circles.

“Why are you all women?” she asked. “Have any men here?! I’m sorry, that’s rude.” She missed the fact that Angel was male, for obvious reasons.

She briefly picked up Charlie, while Vaggie held her spear defensively at her.

“Oh man, this place is filthy!” she exclaimed, running around and lifting up couch cushions. “It really needs a lady’s touch, which is weird, because you’re all ladies, no offence.” She chewed on a black spider she found, then rushed toward some stained glass windows.

She darted around, using a dust ruffle to clean them. “Oh my gosh, this is awful! No, no, no…Nope!”

She raced around, removing cobwebs, then poking at a piece of a voodoo doll. Well, it was actually a live blue beetle doll that Alastor had stabbed with a clothing pin for Niffty to play with. Alastor looked amused, while the others stared in disbelief.

 “So fortunate of me to have met her in Hell. A former chimney sweeper in the 20th century. Heard she died from too much smoke. Services are still good! Though, I didn’t give her much of an option to begin with…”

   Meanwhile, at a casino, a cat demon placed a joker, an ace, a 2, and a fourth card down on the table. He had black and white fur, wore a black top hat and had red wings with card suits decorated on them. He also had long red eyebrows and wore a red bow tie.

“Ha!” he declared in triumph. “Read ‘em and weep, boys!”

He suddenly felt himself being forcefully pulled out of the room through space and time.

“Full…whoa!”

 “Transpòte ganbadeur la.”

 He ducked as a curtain of red energy surrounded the existing space. Voodoo symbols flashed in the background along with eight yellow eyes, a creepy voodoo skull and a purple skeleton of a worm-like creature. Another voodoo skull with horns appeared for a moment not too far from tan ghost-like spirits with creepy faces and a row of jagged teeth.

 The cat demon figured he must have had too much booze to drink.

 “…the hell?”

 As the images faded, he soon found himself at the hotel bar, not in the previous room at the casino. A large “Come and play Blackjack” sign took up much of the wall behind him. Most peculiar, the gray wood walls were missing halfway up, replaced by the red themed décor of the hotel. Husk was sitting in a portion of the casino he was in. It felt like he was in a house with no roof surrounded by the outside world.

 “What the fuck is this?”

He saw Alastor and pointed an accusing claw.

“You.”

“Ah, Husker, my good friend!” Alastor cheerfully greeted. “Glad you could make it!”

Alastor’s head briefly had the appearance of large antlers sticking out from either side. When he moved it, it was revealed to be an antler skull with glowing green eyes hanging in the background. Snakes were wrapped around one of the white curtains supporting a bar stand. “Big Booze,” “Welcome” and “Big Soul” signs were placed overhead on the stand. Neon green card suits consisted of the designs at the bottom of the stand.

“Don’t you “Husker” me, you son of a bitch!” Husk spat, and swiped Alastor’s hand aside from his shoulder. “I was about to win the whole damn pot!”

Husk stared in anger as the stacks of money and chips on the table vanished in static.

“Good to see you too!” added Alastor.

Husk face palmed. “What the hell do you want with me this time?”

Alastor grabbed hold of him, startling him so much that cards fell from his hands.

“My friend, I am doing some charity work, so I took it upon myself to volunteer your services! I hope that’s okay.”

Husk was taken aback. “Are you shittin’ me?!”

“No, I don’t think so,” Alastor replied. He casually brushed off his sleeves.

Husk shoved the Radio Demon off him. “You thought it would be some kind of big fuckin’ riot just to pull me outta nowhere? You think I’m some kinda fuckin’ clown?”

“Maybe.”

Audience laughter emitted from the microphone.

“I ain’t doin’ no fuckin’ charity job,” Husk protested.

Alastor appeared next to him. “Will I figured you would be the perfect face to man the front desk of this fine establishment.”

He pointed toward the bar stand with the staff. The sound of audience clapping came from his radio staff.

“With your charming smile and welcoming energy…”

Alastor spread the corners of Husk’s mouth upward into a demonic smile of yellow teeth. Husk frowned seconds after he let go.

“…this job was made for you!”

Alastor strutted over toward the bar stand, the soles of his shoes revealing red hoof prints as he walked.

“Don’t worry, my friend,” Alastor continued, “I can make this more welcoming…if you wish.”

With a curve of his fingers, a green bottle of cheap booze appeared on the counter.

Husk stared with wide eyes, suddenly very thirsty. He swore he could hear the sound of a slot machine.

“What, you think you can buy me with a wink and some cheap booze?!” He took the bottle on anger. “Well you can!”

He immediately guzzled it down and walked away.

 “Too easy,” thought Alastor.

 By this time, Charlie, Vaggie and Angel Dust had arrived to see what the commotion was about. Vaggie rushed toward the bar, furious.

“Hey, hey, hey, hey!” yelled the moth demon. “No, no bar, no alcohol. This is supposed to be a place that discourages sin! Not some kind of…mouth, brothel, man-cave…”

Angel lunged himself into her, knocking her to the floor.

“Shut up! Shut! Up! We are keeping this.” He pointed at Husk with multiple gloved hands.

He slid up to Husk. “Hey,” he said in a flirtatious voice.

“Go fuck yourself,” Husk deadpanned, drinking his booze.

“Only if you watch me,” Angel retorted.

To make matters worse for Husk, Charlie leaned in close to him, excitement and red stars in her eyes.

“Oh my gosh! Welcome to the Happy Hotel! You are going to love it here!”

“I lost the ability to love years ago,” Husk replied, gulping down more booze.

Alastor walked in, an ever-present grin on his face.

“So, what do you think?”

Charlie ran over to him. “This is amazing!” she beamed.

“It’s okay,” Vaggie said from nearby, arms crossed.

 Alastor laughed and pulled the two girls close to him. “This is going to be very entertaining!”

  Alastor conjured fire in his hand…Charlie stared in wonder at the flames and the voodoo symbols. He pushed Vaggie aside and changed his attire. He now wore a fancy red suit with a white undershirt and a black bow tie. A red top hat appeared on his head, complete with small spikes along the black band and two needles sticking out from the top. He twirled Charlie around in a dance, the princess looking stunned. Pointing his finger over her head, he transformed Charlie’s outfit. Her blonde hair was now short and wavy. She wore an elegant black and red dress, black gloves, a pink hat with a small black bow and black heels. She looked like a dapper lady from the early 20th century.

 Charlie stared at her conjured clothing in amazement.

Vaggie was on the floor, fuming.

Alastor picked Charlie up and threw her into the air. She yelped in delight and landed gracefully next to him. Two glowing apples and a skull with deer horns flashed in the background.

Reality had been altered to the Radio Demon’s liking. The entire room was lit in psychedelic colors. Voodoo symbols and shapes were etched in every nook and cranny, including a pair of pink claws reaching for the door. Alastor and Charlie waltzed in the spotlight as electro swing music began to play in the distance. The all-encompassing noise, though, was the signature radio-static sound.

 Alastor sang his reprise to Charlie:

“You have a dream

You wish to tell

And it’s so laughable

But hey kid, what the hell! “

 Charlie found herself sliding down one of the apple-etched railings, Alastor leading the way. They landed on the lower floor as Alastor continued his reprise.

Deer statues and painted antlers were everywhere.

Back at the bar stand, Husk sat looking bored. Vaggie hissed at Angel grabbing onto her shoulder, while Niffty stared in wonder. Alastor snapped his fingers and their outfits changed as well.

Angel was wearing a neon pink suit, Husk a pink bow tie, Vaggie a dark dress, with her hair now smooth and long, and finally Niffty, with a cute top hat with small flowers.

 “‘Cause you’re one of a kind

A charming demon belle!

Now let’s give these burning fools a place to dwell

(Take it, boys!)”

 Alastor snapped his fingers once more and shadowy imps rose to life from a hole in the ground. The happy spirits played a trumpet, a tuba, and a drum set. Charlie snapped her fingers to the beat, while Vaggie watched with worry. She reached out to her friend but was pulled away by Alastor. He enveloped the group into a tight hug, followed by glowing images of dark spirits staring at them. Niffty watched in amazement, but not the other three.

Alastor pulled Husk and Angel close again. He rubbed Angel’s head with a white hat and went on his merry way. Husk gave him the bird as he left.

Vaggie stood, annoyed in the spotlight. Using his cane, Alastor added a feathered peacock hat and a white fox fur to her outfit. Then out of nowhere, he slapped her butt.

“Pompous pervert!” Vaggie thought in rage as he wondered away.

Alastor danced some more, kicking a horned skull to the side. In the background, Niffy happily swept up the bits of bone.

 “Inside of every demon is a lost cause

But we’ll dress ‘em up now with just a smile!

(With a smile!)

And we’ll chlorinate this cesspool

With some old redemption flair

And show these simpletons some proper class and style!

(What’s in style? Oh!)”

 He made his way to the circular fireplace, where he waved his staff. Shadows arrived to join the party, including a shadowy version of himself, with large antlers and fangs. He made it disappear in a poof, then snuck toward Charlie. He led her in an upbeat dance, spinning her around, helping her match her steps to his. Charlie blushed when toyed with her cheeks. As Charlie was led away, Vaggie stood in the background, horrified and disgusted. What was happening to her friend?

Charlie and Alastor laughed as they danced, the princess locked in a happy trance.

 “Here below the ground

I’m sure you’re plan is sound!

They’ll spend a little time

Down at this Hazbin Ho…”

  Alastor was about to finish his song, when an explosion burst apart a window behind him.

  Niffty stared in amazement, shouting “Whoo!” before she was blasted backwards, the door hitting her in the face.

 Alastor’s spell soon wore off and everyone was back in their regular clothes. Alastor, Husk (still drinking), Niffty, Charlie, Angel, and Vaggie, peered out of the hole to see what was going on. Vaggie had her weapon at the ready.

 Looking skyward, the group saw a cracked blimp in the air. It had a small random band aid with a sad face on it along the rim. A familiar snake villain popped out of his hideout.

“Ha!” Sir Pentious laughed. “Well, well, well, look who it is harboring the striped freak! We meet again, Alastor!”

Apparently, he was also rivals with Alastor.

But Alastor simply asked, “Do I know you?”

The snake boss looked disappointed. Then he said in anger, “Oh yes you do! And this time, I have the element of…surprise!”

The villain raced toward his pink velvet chair and pulled a lever. A metallic cannon lowered to the ground. The cannon fired up with pink energy as pink smoke appeared around them.

“He laughed manically. “I’m so evil!”

Then he added, “I have an Egg army!”

 “Well, we have an Alastor,” Charlie responded.

 Alastor snapped his fingers, red tendrils of smoke rising from his hand. The weapon froze in mid fire and a fiery portal opened up below the blimp.

 A horde of black tendrils rose from the hole, latching onto the ship. One tentacle ripped off the cannon and threw it into another smaller portal, causing it to explode in pink smoke. One of the tentacles had already smashed a hole in the large round window.

Sir Pentious looked on in shock as his Egg Bois slammed against the wall (one of them read #Ouch.) One of the eggs cracked open, spilling out yellowish brains and small organs among the stains of yok. Sir Pentious and another minion were thrown against the wall.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa!” he screamed before he was slammed against the ceiling by a black limb.

“Oh, that hurt!” he cried.

Sir Pentious screamed as he was dragged along the floor and lifted up slightly. He was held in place, surrounded by the wrapped up tendril. At once, the tendril shrunk and squeezed the helpless snake. The Egg Bois ran around screaming as black cracks appeared on the floor and walls.

From the outside, more black tendrils were closing in. Red voodoo symbols appeared around the blimp.

 “Ede m 'sèrviteur.”

Four horned shadowy spirits with red auras floated around, wearing toothy grins.

 The tendrils were now wrapped around the entire blimp, holding it in place like thick black vines.

 Red radio waves filled Alastor’s eyes as he circled his fingers and worked is magic. Voodoo symbols appeared all around him as he altered the state of reality. Radio static consumed the air.

The vines thickened and completely enclosed the blimp. The spirits swooped around it in excitement, with echoing shrieks. The aura around the tendrils glowed a fiery yellow, the same color as the portal rim.

 “Kalfu! Destriksyon pa bra nwa.”

 Alastor closed his four-fingered hand which began to glow. The tendrils proceeded to crush the blimp. Pink rays of light shot from the center and the blimp exploded in a loud BOOM!

Pink smoke spread everywhere as the spirits sped away. The tendrils broke into severed bloody pieces that rained down to the ground. Alastor smiled victoriously, while behind them, the group of five stared in utter terror and shock. (Save for Niffty who had a small smile on her face).

 “Well, I’m starved!” Alastor exclaimed, turning around to face the group. Who wants some jambalaya?” He spread his arms out. “My mother once showed me a wonderful recipe for jambalaya! In fact, it nearly killed her!”

He laughed as he led the way back to the hotel. The others followed.

“You could say the kick was right out of Hell!”

He added while laughing at his own joke, “Oh, I’m on a roll!”

Charlie and Niffty smiled while Husk, Angel, and Vaggie looked on with concern. Angel blew Husk a kiss, which earned the druggie demon a glare from the gambler. Charlie turned to Vaggie excitedly. Vaggie reluctantly went along with Charlie’s idea, even giving her a small supporting smile. As long as Charlie was happy, then she was alright, too.

From up above, the hotel looked like a mashed-up haunted house. An old dark train was perched on a balcony, with some monstrous faces carved in. A ship, reminiscent of the Titanic, was leaning upwards against the building as part of the structure. An old carousel served as part of the upper balcony and windows. Skull designs decorated the small windows in a row. Finally, on top of a giant yellow eye, was the sign “Happy Hotel” supported by pillars of worn wood.  

Alastor continued, “Yes, sir, this is the start of some real changes down here! The game is set! Now…”

 He glanced up and pointed his finger toward the sign. Pink electricity shot out and made contact with the sign.

The sign now read “Hazbin Hotel.”

 “Stay tuned,” he finished with a low sinister laugh.

 Back at the crater, smoke took the faces of demons and rose into the air. Broken egg minions littered the ground. One minion rubbed his head. With a shaking arm, Sir Pentious lifted himself up from the gaping hole, fangs shattered.

“Now will you shoot me with your ray gun?” asked the minion.

Sir Pentious face-planted on the ground in response.

[the-digimon-tamer]

Chapter 25 - Nightmare Motorcycle is out now on FanFiction.Net and ArchiveOfOurOwn! Check them out with the links or find it after the break!

Title: The Tamer v2.0 - In HIs Name

Fandom: Digimon

Rating: T

Synopsis: In the next adventure of the Digimon Tamer, the lives of Juri, Rika, and Henry change forever when digimon begin crossing over into the human world. But it’s all just a story, right? Just a book series by an author no one has seen in a long time. Why are they here and can they save their world before something worse follows the digimon?

The Tamer v2.0: In His Name

Chapter 25: Nightmare Motorcycle

Henry ran up and down the sand where their friends has been a moment before, “Crap! Where’d they go? We have to find them!”

He was about to chase after the beam of light when Leomon grabbed a hold of his shoulder, “No dice! Do you have any idea what’ll happen if you just jump in that? There’s no guarantee that you’ll go where they did. You could end up anywhere! And what good will you do them then?”

“We can’t just leave them!” Henry argued back, amazed that the lion was barely breaking a sweat as he tried to get free. In fact, the lion lifted him up into the air casually, dangling in front of his face, “Don’t worry. They have Renamon and Andromon with them. I can’t think of anyone better to have at your side. Those two can take care of them. What’s important now is that we keep a level head.”

“Moumantai, Henry!” Terriermon patted his partner. Juri looked to Takato, who was still staring off into space silently and tapped on his shoulder to snap him out of it. He didn’t react. It took Guilmon nuzzling him with his snout to finally snap him out of it, “Huh? Oh, hi boy.”

“Are you out of your funk, now?” Terriermon asked gesturing at the beam of light as it moved along the desert sand, “Because we’ve already run into a serious problem and I’m pretty sure you didn’t even notice.”

“Sorry, what’s going on?” Takato looked between them in confusion, finally noticing half of their group were not present, “Where’d everyone go?”

Terriermon chuckled at being proven right while Leomon groaned in frustration. He really hadn’t noticed their friends getting sucked up into the pillar of light! Juri pointed him towards the ever growing distant beam of light and explained, “They got sucked up into this beam of light that went past us!”

Takato raised an eyebrow in surprise, tracing the beam of light skyward, “Beam of light? From what? It’s not connected to anything! It just…sort of goes up forever.”

He traced its path with its finger up the sky until he was pointing straight up, “Well, crap that is a problem. They could be anywhere. They could even be in a completely different world!”

“Yes, we know! How do we find them?” Henry demanded, “Because we’re not going to find them just sitting here doing nothing! Who knows what trouble they’ll get in by themselves? Especially Kazu and Kenta. And you know Rika’s probably going to try and pick a fight.”

“She hasn’t been that bad lately,” Guilmon offered in her defense.

“I think they’ll be fine. They have Andromon and Renamon too. Really, the only one I’m worried about is Kazu,” Takato answered sheepishly, “But if we’re going to find them, we can always go to the Hallowed Bastion. I can track them from there. Come on!”

He turned on his heels and started walking off in a random direction, stopping to check his digivice, and then continued on in a slightly different direction. Guilmon raced after his partner while the rest of them swapped nervous glances. There were so many questions now and Henry asked first, “What’s the Hallowed Bastion?”

“Home City of the Ancients,” Leomon answered quietly, lifting Juri up on to his shoulder, “We should keep up. We don’t want to fall too far behind.”

“How far is it?” Terriermon asked, climbing up onto Henry’s head to sit without asking. He was heavy on Henry’s head, until the digimon spread out his ears to offer some make shift shade. Takato pointed ahead, “That way! Maybe a few days? Actually, we’re going to stop by an old house if that’s okay. I want to get something first.”

“I see time has done nothing to modify your concern for others,” Leomon commented quietly, something Takato chose to ignore. Juri was less sure of that statement. As far as she could think, Takato had always been trying to help others. He’d even been trying to stop fighting between other digimon! She poked Leomon’s head and asked, “What does that mean, Leomon?” 

The lion grimaced, “The last time I saw The Tamer, he was less concerned with the well being of others and more concerned with ensuring they fulfilled their destiny. Whatever that would be. Even if it meant forcing them to watch the people they cared for die.”

None of that sounded like the Takato she knew. Then again, she realized that this wasn’t even the Takato she knew. This Takato was just someone wearing his face and running around with his name. The real Takato was lost…possibly in this world. Thinking about all of this made her heart feel heavy.

And why did Leomon feel the need to bring up destiny? Did he know something she didn’t? She looked back at Leomon, “How do you know all this?”

“I don’t know all the details because I wasn’t there, but supposedly he allowed someone’s mother to die to ensure that certain events happened the way they were supposed to,” Leomon answered. He looked her way and offered a small smile, “It’s alarming but I’ve learned it’s better not to worry about it. It’ll make you paranoid. Make you do things that you normally wouldn’t. I think another one of the digidestined said it best: destiny will work itself out either way, so why worry about it?”

That hardly made her feel better. She felt a lump forming in her throat and tried to swallow it, but couldn’t it. Maybe it was just too hot and dry to do it? Yeah, that had to be it.

…

Impmon followed Makuramon and the hostage Calumon through the endless desert and complained, “Hey! How much farther is this place yous was talkin’ ‘bout?”

“Not much farther, dear Impmon,” the monkey answered playfully, poking the cage he was using to hold Calumon hostage, “Isn’t that right my dear little pet? Oh, what fun we’ll have when I return you to Lord Zhuqiaomon!”

“I don’t think I’ll like your idea of fun,” Calumon’s voice quivered in fear. Makuramon answered by shaking the cage as violently as he could, “Oh, come now Catalyst. I’m sure you’ll enjoy all the little games we’ll play when we finally meet our Lord!”

“I hope you ain’t expecting me to bow coz’ I don’ got no lords,” Impmon folded his arms, growing irate the longer he followed this monkey. It was the smart decision at the time - the monkey had him in a death grip and he’d be dead if he didn’t agree. But now he was wondering if death would’ve been the smarter choice. It would’ve saved him from having to listen to this monkey chatter on and on about crap he didn’t care about. 

A small bright light appeared in the distance, one he hadn’t seen before. Impmon’s eyes narrowed and he looked at Makuramon with a raised eyebrow, “What’s that?”

“That is my destination. I do have a gift to present. But don’t worry, Caturamon will take care of you,” Makuramon cackled. Impmon didn’t like the sound of that laughter and turned to see a snarling dog just inches from his face. He leapt back, preparing two balls of fire in his hands, “How’d you do that?”

“Why is that the first thing everyone asks me?” the dog asked, noticing the cage in Makuramon’s hand, “Is that it?”

Makuramon held out the cage with a big old grin on his face, “Indeed it is! The catalyst given digimon form by the Sovereigns themselves! And do help this poor little fellow. His services were useful in the acquisition of our goal.”

“Alright,” the dog nodded, getting so close to Impmon that his breath made him gag, “Listen well, little one. I am Caturamon, servant of the Sovereigns and guardian of this area. Tell me what you seek and I will help you acquire it.”

Impmon rolled his eyes, skeptical of the wish granting and keeping the fireballs close, “Hey, I ain’t da wishin’ type.”

Caturamon grunted his disapproval, snarling at the imp before blowing out the flames in his hands. Impmon panicked and reignited another set of flames quickly only to have them blown out again. Caturamon then added, “I can do this all day idiot. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity. Anything you want, you can have at our lord’s grace. But this offer will only come once and won’t be given again. What do you want, child?”

Impmon continued staring skeptically before finally answering, “I want the same thing I’ve always wanted: to survive. If that means bein’ strong or smart, I don’t care. I want to not need anybody’ or anythin’!”

Caturamon stared at the imp in surprise, and that annoyed him, “WHAT?”

“Who hurt you?” was all he asked. Impmon was taken aback by that question because of how close it hit to home, “Who says anyone hurt me?”

“No ‘mon is an island,” Caturamon explained, “To want no one or anything...who hurt you?”

“NOBODY!” Impmon snapped angrily. Caturamon closed his eyes, taking a long and deep breath as if to indicate his frustration. Then he sighed, “Very well. I will grant your heart’s desire: but what that means is power. Power unlike any other. And only one can grant that power. The sovereign himself! Lord Zhuqiaomon.”

“I told you, I ain’t got no lords!” Impmon protested, suddenly finding Caturamon taller than he was a second ago. That couldn’t be right. He was eye level a moment ago. Unfortunately, it took Impmon just a second too long to realize he was sinking into the ground like he were stuck in quicksand. He tried to step out of it, but the struggle only made him sink faster, “HEY! WHAT GIVES!? What kinda trick is this? Get met outta here!”

“Do not resist. All will be well,” Caturamon said, failing to be any more reassuring than that stupid monkey. Impmon growled, trying to grab at Caturamon in vain to keep himself above the ever rising sand. But it was too late now. His arms were now submerged in the dirt, leaving only his flailing hands reaching desperately for something. As it made its way up to his face, he tilted his head up to keep it above the rising earth. With his last breath, he cursed the damned dog and the monkey. He cursed himself for being so careless. Darkness took him, followed by a vision of large bird wreathed in flame. Then a flash of fire swallowed him.

…

They walked for the rest of the day, stopping only at the end of the day to eat bread from Takato’s bag and sleep out in the open. As the night grew colder, they tried to get a fire going but had nothing but the bread wrappers to burn - something that only lasted a couple of seconds before the flames burned out. So they spent that night mostly going cold - something Guilmon vocally complained about despite being in a large desert. 

Juri slept by Leomon’s side, since his fur and his large size made him nice and warm. Sleeping beside him reminded her of when she was younger and her dad had been more open with her. It reminded her of all the times he’d let her fall asleep on his lap while he was working or watching TV, before carrying her to bed and tucking her in for the night. It was probably her best night’s sleep in a long time. When she awoke the next morning, she found that the others had also moved in to be beside Leomon at some point in the night. Maybe he was just too warm to resist in this frigid cold desert. And she was well aware how insane that sounded when she thought it out loud. 

They headed out again after a quick breakfast of some more bread and hurried on in the direction Takato led them. It was another day of endless trekking through arid heat under a baking sun until they saw what looked like several small mounds in the desert. From afar, it looked like a mass of hills. But the closer they got, the more it began to resemble igloos of mud with their doors sealed shut with scrap metal.

“What is this place?” Juri asked, looking around curiously at the many huts. The place was almost like a ghost town, except ghost towns had signs people used to live there. But there were clothes hanging off clothes lines and smoke coming from the chimneys. So someone had to be living here now, right? Takato took one look around, “A village by the looks of it. Let’s see if anyone’s home! HELLO! Anybody here? Were friendly! I promise! Don’t mind the lion! Or the dinosaur. They’re the nicest. The bunny dog thing is more dangerous than they are.”

“Hey!” Terriermon grumbled, sticking out his tongue at Takato and turning his head in disapproval. Takato ignored him and knocked on one of the doors. When no answer came from inside the abode, he banged harder, “Anybody? Somebody? Hello! I swear we’re friendly!”

“Takato!” Henry pulled him back, “What are you doing?” 

“Knocking,” he answered quietly, “What does it look like I’m doing?”

“No, I mean why are you banging on the door? We don’t know who lives in there!” Henry corrected him anxiously, “For all we know, it’s some crazy dangerous digimon who’ll eat our face.”

Despite his concerns, Takato shrugged it off and patted his head, “Don’t be ridiculous Henry. Only Kuwagamon do that and they tend to live under the sand, not in huts this small.”

“Okay, so what if it’s something else? Something that wouldn’t mind eating us!?” Henry pointed out. He and Takato stared at each other for the longest time before he knocked on the door again, throwing all of Henry’s concerns out the window with it. Henry groaned in frustration, just as the metallic door slid open for a little brown bear made of dirt to peek out, “Hello?”

Takato put on his cheeriest face, “Hi! We’ve lost some friends and are looking for them. Then again, we’re also a little lost ourselves. Do you have any water or some food?”

“You’re not with that demon, are you? The crazy demon motorcycle,” the little brown bear asked. Takato looked back at the rest of them with a raised eyebrow, skeptically remarking, “Demon motorcycle? Don’t be ridiculous! We’re not with a demon motorcycle! I’ve seen a crazy puppet, statues comes to life, and even world ending monsters from outside reality and not once have I ever seen a demon motorcycle!”

“What kinda digimon is that?” Juri pointed at the brown bear, “I’ve never seen one before like this.”

“Chuchidarumon. They’re a subtype or Frigimon only made with mud instead of ice and snow,” Takato answered knowledgeably, “They’re a really docile digimon too. Normally friendly. This motorcycle must have you guys really spooked if you’re locking all your doors!”

“Get away from the door! If the motorcycle sees you, it’ll come back!” a voice rang out from inside the hut. The door slammed shut after that, followed by the unmistakable sound of the click of several locks. Terriermon frowned, “Well that was rude.”

“What do you suppose they mean by demon motorcycle?” Leomon asked. Henry shrugged and pointed out, “More importantly, why do they keep talking about the motorcycle and not the rider? I’d think the rider is more dangerous.”

“Does anyone else hear that?” Takato asked, holding up a finger for complete silence. Juri closed her and cupped a hand to her ears, hearing only the distant sound of the wind blowing past. She opened her eyes and answered, “I don’t hear anything.”

Terriermon’s ears perked up and he added, “I do! It’s like a...a rumble.”

“Something’s coming,” Guilmon added, lifting up his nose to sniff the air. Juri closed her eyes again and tried to listen carefully. Nothing. No wait, there was something. A soft hum or rumble. Like an engine. A motorcycle engine! And it was getting closer and louder. Turning her head towards the noise, she saw the unmistakable shape of an unridden motorcycle roaring their way with no one riding upon it. And the headlight of this motorcycle flashed a grim blood red as it raced towards them, like a singular eye pierced into their very being to judge them. She gasped and Leomon groaned, “You’ve gotta be kidding me! They were serious!? A demon motorcycle!?”

“Oh, that is new,” Takato said almost too gleefully, “A self driving motorcycle!”

“Uh...it’s coming right at us,” Henry pointed out.

“We should run,” Terriermon added, pulling on Henry so that he would turn and start moving. Everyone did just that, hurrying towards one of the huts and climbing on top of the mounds to avoid the rampaging vehicle. At first, it seemed they would be safe but that did nothing to slow the machine down or hinder it as it rammed at full speed into the side of the hut. It shook violently, Juri grasping on to her partner for dear life while he dug his sword into its side to anchor them. The others were hardly fairing any better, trying to keep from getting knocked off and hanging on only by digging their hands straight into the mud. The hut shook one more time and motorcycle emerged from the other side, throwing a Chuchidarumon forward onto the ground and running it over. The digimon let out a single pained cry before disappearing into data. During that brief moment the motorcycle passed under them, Juri swore she saw what looked like a small metallic rabbit riding on its seat - so small that it was hardly noticeable. In fact, it was smaller than Calumon of all things. And it didn’t look to have any arms or legs! How was it driving the motorcycle? 

The motorcycle turned on its spot and revved its engine at them, producing a loud roar as it charged again. This time, it raised up its front wheel to transfer its momentum and raced up the side of the hut.

“JUMP!” Takato shouted, as they all leapt off the hut in time for the motorcycle to fly past them and land on the other side. Leomon kept Juri on his shoulder, “Hang tight, Juri. This motorcycle really is a demon!”

“No, there’s someone riding it!” Juri pointed out, “A little rabbit thing!”

“A rabbit?” Takato repeated, eyeing the motorcycle carefully. It had already regained its footing and was readying itself again, rushing their way. Takato ran in front of them and shouted, “HEY! LOOK AT ME! COME AND GET ME!”

“TAMER! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?” Leomon roared out, rushing forward to stop the boy. The motorcycle had already turned though and was rushing right at him. Takato continued onward though, flailing his arms above his head, “That’s right! Over here! Come and get me!”

“What is he doing!?” Juri gasped, closing her eyes to avoid seeing what she thought she was going to see. There was a loud thump and soft crash. Her heart stopped. The only person who had any idea how to get them back had just thrown himself in front of a motorcycle! They were doomed! Royally doomed. She peeked her eyes open a little to see Takato on the sand, cradling something in his arms as he looked over his shoulder at the motorcycle continuing into the distance. Now with Guilmon riding upon it. As he stood up, Juri could make out the metallic rabbit in Takato’s arms and it weakly apologized, “I’m sorry! I saw everything. As soon as I was on the seat, I lost all control. It was like the motorcycle was making me do those things!”

“It’s alright, MetalKoromon,” Takato assured the little bunny and stroking its head. He handed the digimon over to Leomon and announced, “Do you mind holding this? I need to go save Guilmon!”

“HERE I COME TAKATOMON!” Guilmon roared at the top of his lungs, turning the motorcycle to face him. There was something off now about the red dinosaur, something different about him. Almost like he was possessed. MetalKoromon urged Takato, “Don’t do it! If that motorcycle gets you, it’s all over! All it wants is to find stronger riders! As soon as it does, it kicks off whoever is on it and kills everything else. Please! Don’t do it!”

“I’m not letting anything happen to Guilmon,” Takato said, adjusting his goggles over his head to cover his eyes. He looked back at Leomon and declared, “Be ready to knock me off as soon as you can!”

“What are you going to do?” Henry asked. Takato shrugged, “Get on the motorcycle, see what happens, maybe take it for a ride afterwards.”

He ran forward again and Henry groaned, “What’s with the throwing himself in danger act? Is he crazy or stupid?”

“We all know it’s both,” Terriermon remarked.

The motorcycle revved again, and Guilmon shouted, “YOU’RE ALL MINE NOW!”

“Then come get me!” Takato shouted back, standing in front of the motorcycle with his arms wide open. The motorcycle roared its engine and charged in again, going faster than it had before. Still, Takato didn’t move. Just as she was sure he’d get run over this time, the motorcycle’s brakes shrieked as it slid to a stop in front of him. It idled there with Guilmon staring Takato down, “YOU KNOW WHAT I WANT!”

“Yeah, I’m right in front of you. No need to shout. Or be rude,” Takato rubbed his ear. He stepped onto the side of the motorcycle and took hold of the handle bars. Immediately, Guilmon fell off in a daze so that Takato could get on the seat. He was hilariously small on its large frame, scooting as far forward as he could to grab both the handle bars and the foot rests, “So how does this work? Is it immediate or - CONTROL ACHIEVED! NOW WE RIDE! FIND STRONGER! KILL ALL ELSE! Yeah, I don’t think so. Also, why do you sound like Rika? IMPOSSIBLE! CONTROL HAS BEEN OVERRIDDEN! SURRENDER TO MY WILL! I AM THE BEAST! With all that shouting, I don’t doubt it. YOU WILL RESPECT MY WILL! Don’t tell me how to live my life. It’s my body and it’s my choice!”

It was weird. One second, Takato was screaming at the top of his voice and the next he spoke with the calm he’d shown before. And he was arguing with himself using the two voices. 

“Tamer, what’s happening?” Leomon shouted at him. Takato answered, “The demon motorcycle is trying to take over my brain, I think. It’s not very good at it. I HEARD THAT! That’s because I said it as loud as I could. YOU WILL BREAK BEFORE ME BOY! Boy? I’m older than you, I think. Also you look really familiar, have we seen each other before? HOW DO YOU RESIST!? BREAK! BREAK! BREAK! Not with that attitude, I won’t. Maybe you ought to try asking nicely? It’s not going to hurt. AAAAAAARRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH! I WILL RUN YOU DOWN!”

“Is it safe to get close?” Henry asked aloud. Takato shot him a dirty look and roared, “TRY IF YOU CAN MEAT BAG! TOUCH MY TREADS! I DARE YOU! It’s probably safe. I still have control over the finer motor functions so it’s not like it can make me rev the handle bar. WHY WON’T YOU SUBMIT? You didn’t say please. SO YOU WILL IF I DO? I didn’t say that. I HATE YOU SO MUCH! GET OFF! But I just got comfortable.”

Henry stared at him quietly before asking the obvious question, “Okay, so what happens now that you’re on there? If we knock you off, does the motorcycle just topple over or does it start moving on its own?”

“WHY DON’T YOU COME CLOSER AND FIND OUT MEAT SACK! LET ME RUN YOU OVER! KILL! KILL! KILL! Don’t be rude. Those are my friends and you should treat them with respect. THEY CAN RESPECT MY TREADS! KILL THEM ALL! YES! KILL THEM ALL! Okay, that’s totally uncalled for. And I don’t know, Henry. It’s not going anywhere so I think I’m in control of it but who knows what’ll happen,” Takato replied with a shrug. Leomon readied his sword and marched over to Takato, quietly answering, “There’s only one way to find out. Hah!”

He swung it as hard as he could so that the flat end of the blade struck Takato in the chest. The boy grunted, thrown off the bike and landing beside it with a frown, “Wow! What a trip! I’d do it again if I didn’t have to fight a killer bike for control of my own body. Now where did you come from? I mean...you weren’t here last time I was in the Digital World. Another world? Another version of the Digital World? What’s your story?”

“Not knowing things seems to be a theme for you, doesn’t it?” Terriermon observed. All eyes were on the motorcycle now as it sat there unmoving. Its engine was still running despite having no rider, but it had lost all ability to propel itself forward without a rider to steer or keep it balanced. Then it toppled over into the sand. Guilmon sniffed the motorcycle and Takato dusted himself off, “Well, that’s that. We should not do that again.”

“We? That was all you, Takato,” Henry slapped his back, then looked back down at the motorcycle. They were all thinking the same thing, even though they weren’t saying it. They should probably destroy it. Leomon raised his sword above his head, “Well, let’s finish this!”

“Wait!” Takato interrupted, “If we destroy this, someone’s going to need to absorb its data. The last thing we need is for its data to get loose into the Digital world! Who knows what kind of damage that could do if all that...killing intent ended up scattered. It might drive us all crazy. Or, worse, it could just mean the motorcycle reformats somewhere else. And then we’ll be right back where we started.”

“Are you sure about any of that?” Leomon asked, poking the motorcycle with the pointy end of his sword. The motorcycle revved its engine in protest but that just made Leomon jab it harder. Everyone else leapt back in surprise, covering their ears as it roared even louder. Terriermon commented, “I guess it’s still kicking.”

“But it doesn’t look like it can do anything without a rider so who cares?” Henry pointed out. The motorcycle continued to rev its engine in protest, trying in vain to do something other than just lay on the ground. The noise started to draw attention though as the mud bear digimon started to emerge from their huts en masse to see the motorcycle for themselves. One of them looked at it, “Is it…is it beaten?”

“Looks like it,” Leomon said, continuing to poke it with his sword, “As long as no one else climbs on it, it’ll just lay there and gather dust.”

That announcement drove the motorcycle into a rage as it started roaring its engine as loud as it could, making its rear wheel spin so fast that it began to spin in place on the ground. The Chuchidarumon retreated away in terror until Leomon jabbed his sword between the spikes of the rear wheel to stop it from spinning. The sword made a sickening grinding noise as the wheel became stuck on the sword and the engine finally died. Takato pointed at the motorcycle, “Are you done throwing a tantrum? Because it’s not going to help you get out of your situation. And it’s not going to make us help you get up. So why not stop with this and-”

As Takato continued to lecture the motorcycle, another soft rumble caught their attention. Juri clung on to Leomon, “Earthquake!”

“Not an earthquake! A sink hole!” Takato said, moving back from the motorcycle as the ground opened up just ahead of them. As they retreated away, the hole widened large enough to swallow the motorcycle into it. About a meter down into the hole was a layer of boiling hot magma that consumed the motorcycle. The motorcycle revved its in engine, creating a horrible grinding noise as it sank into the molten crag and burst into flame. One of the Chuchidarumon threw a rock at it as it sank in, “Good riddance!”

“That stupid thing has been terrorizing us for weeks! We could only leave our homes for a few moments at a time before it came to attack us!” another added, “Thank goodness it’s all over.”

Juri shared that sentiment - watching Takato go half insane like that was terrifying. What would possess the motorcycle to even behave like that? Why was it so driven to destroy everything? What had the Digital World ever done to it to make it like that?

The earth began to rumble again, and the surface of the lava began to ripple outwards until the motorcycle emerged. It flew out of the pit that had opened in the ground, driven by a new rider - a tall man wearing all leather under black armor. It wore a violet mask over its face, concealing everything but three glaring eyes full of blood thirsty glee. The rider cheered, “OH YEAH! THIS IS POWER, RIGHT HERE! REAL POWER! OH, I CAN FEEL IT! ALL OF IT! LISTEN UP! I AM BEELZEMON, RIDER OF THE BEHEMOTH, KING OF THE DIGITAL WORLD, DESTROYER OF WORLDS, AND WRECKER OF YOUR SHIT!”

“Well now I’ve seen everything and I hate it,” Takato threw up his hands in frustration, “I mean what did I miss? The Digital World is a lot more surreal than I remember.”

“He smells familiar,” Guilmon sniffed in the Beelzemon’s direction, “He smells like…Impmon.”

Juri squinted her eyes at Beelzemon, unsure there was a resemblance between the digimon. She had only seen Impmon once, and this was definitely not him. But Guilmon seemed to recognize him. Takato blinked and pointed at the digimon in disbelief, “That’s Impmon? He’s a lot taller than I remember.”

“Wait, Impmon is the one who kidnapped Calumon, right?” Henry pointed out. Beelzemon grunted, “Hmph.”

“Where is he!?” Terriermon shouted, “Don’t you know what you did by giving him over to the Devas!”

“So what? That ain’t my problem,” Beelzemon growled, revving the engine of the motorcycle. Takato snapped his fingers, “I got it! You’re infected by the motorcycle! It’s in your head and making you exceptionally violent! We just got to fix that and knock you off.”

“Knock me off? What? Are you mockin’ me!?” Beelzemon roared. He cracked his knuckles and reached for a strap on the side of the motorcycle, producing a double barreled shotgun which he cocked by spinning it in his hand. He pointed it straight at them, “I’ll show you! TAKE THIS!”

“DUCK!” Takato shouted, diving onto Guilmon and pushing him to the ground. Henry followed suit, holding Terriermon close as he dove for the dirt. Leomon followed suit, removing her from his shoulder and hugging her tight as he leapt for safety behind one of the buildings. All of the Chuchidarumon ran away in a panic, running into their homes for safety while Beelzemon roared, “THAT’S RIGHT YOU LITTLE SHITS! RUN! RUN AWAY! AH-HA-HA-HA!”

“So did he always swear this much or is that just the motorcycle?” Terriermon asked, watching Beelzemon rev the engine again as he turned the motorcycle towards them. He grinned ear to ear and revved his engine one more time before turning away from them. He raised his middle finger at them and rode off into the distance, taking one last chance to shout, “I DIDN’T NEED HUMANS’ THEN AND I DIDN’T NEED ‘EM NOW! SCREW YOU DWEEBS!”

“Well, at least we know Impmon’s safe,” Takato said dryly, taking a moment to dust the sand off himself before helping his partner up. Guilmon frowned, “He seemed really mad. I hope he’s not mad at us.”

“I doubt it,” Takato frowned, “We got two choices: go after him to find Calumon or keep going to the Bastion to find the others.”

Juri didn’t like the fact that they had two equally difficult choices to make in front of them and frowned at Henry’s answer, “That shouldn’t even be a question. We find Rika and the others, then we go after Beelzemon. Besides, without Calumon, none of our digimon can digivolve. We’ll need as many of us together as we can to stand a chance. Rika’s our best fighter and Juri’s still new to all this. No offense, Juri.”

“None taken,” Juri waved it off, putting on her biggest smile while feeling more useless than she had a in a while. Leomon was probably the strongest digimon on their team right now, and she hadn’t done anything with him. Rather, he’d taken initiative on everything. She felt like a horrible partner right now.

[shreddedparchment]

The End of the World Pt.7

Thor, Rescue, and War Machine

Pairing: Thor x Reader

Word Count: 3,355

Masterpost

Warnings: None

A/N: Okay...I tried to hold off. I couldn’t. I kept thinking about the story and I had to get it out. Oh well. I had lots of fun writing this particular part as it had some action in it and I was listening to the remix of Another One Bites the Dust from Iron Man 2 when I was writing it. Hope you all like it! Don’t feel shy if you do. I love to hear from y’all. xoxo

Spending the night on a beach with Thor definitely has to be in your top five nights ever. Seeing as how things ended with “the snap” you feel a little guilty for feeling so happy. Its bursting from you. Unbidden and uncontrollable, as you land on the same balcony that you'd first seen Pepper in what you now know as the Rescue armor, you don’t protest as Thor leans down to steal another kiss. He slides his hand into your salt encrusted hair. You can still smell the ocean on his skin and its intoxicating.

You place your hands on either side of his face and return the affection and follow it up with one, two, three more pecks. With a sappy smile on his face, Thor takes your hand and leads you towards the atrium. You know that's not what it’s called but it’s the largest living space you’ve ever seen and it’s not exactly a living room since there are two meeting tables, a large display screen, and the kitchen there. So, it’ll do.

As you two get closer you can hear a muddle of voices talking in worried tones. Thor stops and looks at you, his previously relaxed brow now furrowed. You cling to his arm a little closer and follow him when he leads you into the atrium. At the second meeting table stands Rhodey, Pepper, Bruce, while Tony sits at the head of the table with his elbows on his knees and his head in his hands. The sight of him makes your stomach churn a little but you force yourself to focus on the newest addition to the group.

She stands upright, her back at attention with her arms crossed over her chest.  You remember her with red hair from the few times you’d seen her on TV but the blonde isn’t bad. You can still remember the time she was questioned over Shield collapsing because of some Hydra thing or other. Again, before you knew Thor.

She looks severe, her own eyes narrowed at something at the center of the table.

“Natasha?” Thor recognizes her faster and releases you as he moves towards her. Natasha looks over at the sound of her name and her face breaks into a pleasant smile.

“Thor! Jeez, have you gotten bigger?” As they reach each other they exchange a brief hug.

“I thought you and Steve were helping the Black Panther in Wakanda?” Thor glances over his shoulder at you and turns back to Natasha, but holds his hand open back towards you.

You move forward and take it; a relief washes over you for some unknown reason.

“Oh, well Steve is still there. He sent me to help Pepper with her mission in Washington.” Pepper had already gone to Washington? “And who's this?” Natasha's voice is kind and polite.

“Y/N this is Natasha, who you might know as the Black Widow. Natasha, this is Y/N, my intended.” Thor says proudly looking down at you.

There are several reactions, all at once.

“What? Oh, my God. Wow.” Bruce says, he sounds happy.

“You did it, already?” Pepper asks excitedly.

Rhodey claps his hands twice. “Yeah, alright. It's about time something good happened.”

Tony's head shoots out of his hands as he turns his only slightly less drunken gaze on both you and Thor. He doesn’t say anything, and his expression is unreadable. You don’t have long to contemplate his look because Natasha suddenly hugs Thor and you.

“Congratulations, Thor, Y/N. I’m so happy for you. And it's,” She laughs a little as she looks at Thor and then back at you. “Nice to meet you.”

It is a little weird that she only just met you and you’re suddenly engaged to Thor, but she does seem genuinely happy for you both.

You can’t help but wiggle the ring on your finger as you smile like a fool at Thor in your own, now renewed excitement.

“Nice to meet you.” You say, also with a slight laugh.

“So, what were they hauling?” Rhodey probes. Suddenly, it's all business again. Pepper leans forward and opens a plain looking cardboard box. She pulls out only one of the many small tubes inside. She holds the glass vial gently with one hand, gently balancing it from one silver tipped end to the other. As it comes into the light you see that the vial is full of an almost opaque blue liquid. It’s almost as if it wants to be clear but can’t quite fully manage it. As Pepper angles it this way and that you notice an odd shimmer within the blue liquid. It looks like small veins of a bright orange substance. You lean in closer to see if you can get a better look at the lines but as you’re trying to get your look, you notice that Tony is still watching you and Thor, some strange emotion in his eyes.

“Is that Super Soldier Serum?” Bruce wonders. He takes a step away, his hands coming up to wipe at his shirt just underneath his chest where he leaves them nervously.

“Yes.” Natasha says, plainly, her voice hard as she stares at the vial Pepper holds.

“What’s that?” Rhodey says, leaning in towards the vial. “May I?” He holds out his hand for it and Pepper hands it over to him.

“How did you come by this?” Thor asks, looking straight at Pepper, his brow furrowed again. How can they all go into business mode so quickly? Lots of experience probably.

“We intercepted a shipment as it was being transferred between two shadow groups.” Pepper begins then leans with both hands on the table as she gives Thor her full attention. “We’re not sure who they are or who they even report to. With half the population gone it’s left lots of facilities open. People are getting into things that they never would have before. Our defenses are down and so is everyone else’s. These new groups are exploiting those weaknesses to their full extent. I can only assume what they were going to do with this stuff but after what Tony said about the other Super Soldiers in Siberia, I thought it would be best if we got these off the streets.”

Other Super Soldiers? There are more than just Captain America? “What other Super Soldiers?”

Thor looks at you and wraps one arm around your shoulders but before he can explain Bruce suddenly looks down and pulls a vibrating device out of his pocket. He looks at the screen for two seconds then looks up at Thor, his eyes wide and his mouth slightly open. “I think we found them.”

In the same moment both Bruce and Thor are racing down out of the atrium and down the hallway that leads to the lab. You watch Thor leave with a heavy heart and fidget with your ring again. The others give them a quick look as they race off but otherwise turn their faces back to the table.

“This looks modified.” Rhodey says as he passes the vial into Natasha’s open hand.

“I wouldn’t doubt it. Everyone seems to be trying to get this to work better.” She tilts her head to the side slightly as she considers the vial then hands it back to Pepper. “Quick fix.”

You glance over your shoulder towards the lab again, your heart dropping as you admit to yourself that you might have to say goodbye to Thor much sooner than you’d hoped.

“How many of these did you find?” Rhodey moves to pull the box closer but stops as Tony suddenly gets to his feet. You turn your gaze on him and catch him still watching you. His expression is more readable now. He’s serious, considering you it seems, and for a moment he even looks smug? The look vanishes quickly as he turns away from the table and wanders off into some random door that you hadn’t noticed before.

You’re not the only one watching him. “How long has he been like that?” Natasha asks.

“Too damn long.” Rhodey’s annoyance seeps into his tone making him sound bitter and angry.

“I didn’t count how many were in this box but it’s full. And we found seventeen other boxes just like this one.” Pepper sighs turning her gaze back on the vials. She places the one she took back in the box and then places her hands on her hips. “Whoever we took these from is going to want them back.”

“Yeah they are.” Rhodey agrees. “Maybe we should-”

You don’t get to hear what you should maybe do. There’s a small thud that draws everyone’s attention to the wall of windows that makes up the balcony that you’d walked in through.

“Everyone get down!” Natasha shouts, but before you can react a ball of heat explodes from the wall of glass. It shatters and the glass flies towards you as you fight against the blindness the bright and sudden flash has given you. The force of the explosion throws you onto the ground and you feel yourself hit one of the chairs on your way down. No way you didn’t break something.

As the smoke settles you hear a rush of feet over shattered glass around you but you still cannot see. You blink your eyes, trying to clear them, and look around at where you were sure Natasha, Rhodey, and Pepper had been standing.

“Y/N, are you okay?” Natasha’s voice comes from somewhere to your left but you’re winded and you can’t answer right away. You hear her grunt and then the sound of fists hitting flesh. “Pepper, there’s too many of them.”

“I got it!” Pepper cries out. You hear the unmistakable sound of her suit. You push yourself up into a sitting position, one hand nursing your right ribs, as your eyes finally begin to clear. There, where Pepper had been standing, is Rescue. Pepper disappears behind the mask of her suit and lifts off the ground. She flies, full speed at two men clad in dark clothes. They could be hoodies and ski masks, but they look sleeker. She vanishes through the now open wall, into the night sky taking a man in each hand. Natasha throws herself into her punches, hitting one, two, three black clad men after the other. She knees one in the stomach. Swipes the legs out from underneath the second. Punches the third in the face, once, twice, three times. As the first comes back and aims a hit she blocks it, throwing her weight into the block then goes for his stomach. He yells in his anger. He brings his other arm up and over to hit her hard over the head, but Natasha grabs his arm, side-steps the move, and brings the arm hard down on her knee. A sickening crack echoes around you as the man’s arm breaks. He falls to the ground. Natasha has no chance to catch her breath as the second and third men have recovered, and both charge her. Your eyes fly to Rhodey who is also fighting two men. He extends his arm and his shining silver and black armor fly towards him from down the hall. As the glove falls into place he lunges forward in a full body punch and hits one of the men. He goes flying. The rest of his suit arrives covering him head to toe. A well-aimed uppercut sends the second man into the ceiling and back down to the floor in a heap. As a third man rushes towards him he extends his arm in a fist. A small panel at his wrist slides up and to the side to reveal a small missile.

“No explosives in the house.” Natasha shouts as she ducks a punch and delivers one herself. “We’ve got civilians in here.”

It takes you a second to realize she means you. War Machine looks at you then opens his palm and sends a repulsor beam at the man instead. It hits him square on the chest and he flies through the open wall and off the balcony to the ground below. Natasha turns back to a new two men and lays one out with a hard kick to the face. She twirls around a punch and kicks hard at the back of the second man’s leg. He falls to his knees. She wraps her arms around his neck and squeezes until he stops moving then lets him drop. She moves towards the wall of glass as Rescue comes flying in and lands roughly on the floor. War Machine moves towards the two and they survey the men littering the floor. Five by Natasha, two by War Machine, one on the ground below the balcony, the two that Rescue had taken out. Under Rescue’s arm is the cardboard box that had been sitting on the table.

Her mask slides back revealing a slightly sweaty face. “There were six more outside, waiting about half a mile outside of the property. Some of them got away. My priority was the box but I don’t think they’ll be trying again.” She looks at the broken wall then her gaze falls on you.

“Y/N? Are you-”

A penetrating shout from the other side of the room cuts her off. “Y/N?!” Thor is a near blur as he races towards you and drops to his knees to get a look at you. “What the hell happened?” He demands as he looks to the others then back to you.

“Some guys broke in.” Natasha moves to your side as well and begins to check out your arms and legs then moves to poking at your sides.

Thor looks at the unconscious men on the floor and glares in their direction before he brings his gaze back to you and exchanges his rage for worry.

“I’m going to go patrol the perimeter.” War Machine moves to the balcony then lifts off and flies off into the sky. Rescue moves towards your small group and places the box on the table again. “F.R.I.D.A.Y., call down to the hospital wing and get a doctor up here. And call security up here to collect these guys. Lock them up.”

“Calling now, Miss Potts.” A few seconds later. “The doc will be here in ten minutes. He was asleep.” A cool and slightly accented voice sounds from somewhere around you but you’re not sure where exactly it’s coming from.

“I’m going to go help James.” Pepper’s mask falls back into place and Rescue flies off from the balcony too. A moment later several men and women wearing dark blue uniforms rush in and in teams of two remove one intruder after the other.

Natasha finally reaches your right side and as she pokes at your ribs you gasp and flinch away from her touch. “Broken ribs maybe just fractured. We’ll have to get her x-rayed. What’s keeping that doctor?”

Natasha gets to her feet and hurries out of the atrium. As the last intruder is removed Thor scoops you up into his arms and carefully places you in the nearest chair. Even the slight jostling has your side burning. You try to keep as much of the pain from showing up on your face as you can. You don’t want him to see you like that.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N. I should not have left you here alone.” Thor’s voice is hard and full of regret. You reach up and place your hand on his cheek as he kneels beside you.

“You didn’t leave me alone, you left me with War Machine, Rescue, and freakin’ Black Widow. None of you could have predicted that someone would attack.” You look to the wall, now a gaping hole of shattered glass and broken supports. “I guess being here isn’t as safe as we thought?”

“I should have protected you.” Thor insists.

“Thor, you couldn’t have done anything differently.” You didn’t want him focusing on the attack, so you shift the focus to the only thing that might matter more than you. “What happened with Bruce? The scanner? Was it your people?”

Thor sighs. “It might be. I was coming to tell you that I’ll have to go but now…I don’t think I should. I’ll send Rocket and he’ll be able to lead my people here to Earth. He’s the smartest Captain I know, and he’s travelled space by ship much more than I have.”

“What? You can’t not go just because of this.” You gesture at the chaos around you.

“I will not leave you here. You are right, this place is not safe.”

You frown, unwilling to be the reason Thor is kept from his people. Not only does it bother you that you’re keeping him from his rightful place but the fact that it’s for something as stupid as possible broken ribs. “You’re not staying. You’re going.”

“How can I possibly-”

“I refuse to be a choice between you and your people. You’ve asked me to marry you and with that comes certain risks. I’m prepared to take them.” You keep your voice steady and manage to forget the pain as you focus on convincing him to go.

“I know but-”

“Unless you regret asking me to marry you? You think I can’t handle it?”

“What? No, never. I could never think that. I know how brave you are, but you shouldn’t have to deal with injuries or danger.”

“And yet, I will. Thor, go. Like I said the other day, I will be right here, waiting for you. I promise.” You reach out for his face and pull him in for a quick kiss. His hands find your shoulders and then cling to you as if he’s worried you’ll disappear. When you pull back, you lick your lips and sigh. “Please don’t make me the thing that holds you back.”

Thor sighs. “Alright.”

Relief washes over you. “When will you go?” Your relief disappears, replaced by nervous fear. You don’t want to be away from him.

“Immediately. The faster I go the faster I may return to you. I will not be gone long.” He promises. He pulls you in for another kiss, this one longer, stronger, and tender. He pulls away suddenly, leaving you wanting more. He moves towards the balcony and stops once he’s reached it to take a long look at you. He holds out his hand and storm breaker flies into it from where? You don’t know. As it touches his hand he’s suddenly bathed in bright blue and white electricity. It singes his regular clothes, replacing it with his black armor and red cape. His gaze on you is unbearable. His brow drawn down at the outer corners as he struggles with his decision. His blue eyes fill with more and more hesitation the longer he looks at you. His shoulders are tense and the muscles of his arms flex as he grips Stormbreaker’s handle tightly. He clenches his jaw, finally resolving to go. “Please stay safe for me.”

“I promise.” You give him a small smile for reassurance and hope that your own sadness at seeing him go is well hidden. He holds up Stormbreaker and in a flash of bright white rainbow light he’s gone. You’re alone now. Natasha has yet to return. You can hear the distant sounds of Rescue and War Machine flying around the facility. You look down at your arms and then slowly stand to look at yourself in the reflection of the surprisingly undamaged monitor. Your face is covered in small scratches from the glass, your arms and legs as well. Aside from the ache in your ribs, you feel your right leg also burning. This is what he saw when he looked at you? A damaged human, weak and frail. No wonder he didn’t want to leave.

Would he be focused on his mission? He would be wondering if you are safe. Distracted. A weakness. His hindrance. Anger bubbles up in your chest and your eyes shift to the cardboard box on the table.

@bionic-buckyb @mdgrdians @biawol @ulired @markusstraya

[flippinoptimist]

> Vel : Meet a nerdlord

Today at 2:45 AM

deputyheadmistress Alright, someone talking to you on my behalf about a lack of privacy got to me a bit. But I'm not upset with you for how the internet behaves.

flippinoptimist thats lurky, theyre a little closer to omniscient than is average for most beings, and like kind of giving advice, and they mean well i think they meant it mostly to make me stop chargin around in like, manic mode, though, even if stuff relatin to you was the causal start of the chain sorry you got dragged into it miss granger, and that i wasn't doin the tact thing

deputyheadmistress I didn't mean them, I meant the thread about different faux book titles. But a close to omniscient being is, I suppose, something I'll also have to get used to. I'm at least a bit used to manic teens, though it's not the best way to get shocking information.

flippinoptimist i think my earth age would technically start with a two, but thats sorta recent after you spend enough time around here you get used to the like, multiverse

deputyheadmistress Can we, perhaps, stop talking about the multiverse for a few moments? And talk about something a bit more grounding, like your particular brand of magic. I'm very curious.

flippinoptimist sure its sorta a fusion of everything ive run across, since the inherent stuff that my ~destiny~ tried to put on me isnt the same kind of stuff as the place where im learnin the inherent is more of a "woo, heres a big abstract concept, you are an incarnation / channeler of a shard of it, neato"

deputyheadmistress That sounds like a lot to dig into, but alright.

flippinoptimist the school part is about how you can structure thought and energy flow into symbols and runes and things i'm focusin on artificing ..and the inherent part has given me a knack for illusions i cant figure out how to actually cast spells but im good at making things!

deputyheadmistress Oh! I was very good at ancient runes during my time at Hogwarts, and while I haven't managed to do much with it since graduation, other than an enchanted bag, I'd be really curious to see what similarities there might be. I wonder if you can cast spells. Logic seems like it'd point to yes, but if you're from somewhere else...

flippinoptimist id be curious about them!  i know the words to a few spells but ive never seen  them and do naut have a wand of the kind you are thinking of the wands i know about / make each have a specific spell in them, and are locked to create a specific effect that triggers when a gesture or word or w/e happens

deputyheadmistress That's terribly inefficient.

flippinoptimist sure, its Terrible

deputyheadmistress ... Is that referencing those historical people of note who end up being so infamous people associate them with the word 'Terrible' as well?

flippinoptimist naut much different than having a necklace that makes you invisible though yes! it also enables a billion terrible puns

deputyheadmistress I was curious. It's a bit strange to add it yourself, don't you think?

flippinoptimist (ba dum tsh)

deputyheadmistress Oh.

flippinoptimist it is

deputyheadmistress Well, that explains that, doesn't it?

flippinoptimist but my species has this thing, where on adulthood we each replace our kid name with an adult Title

deputyheadmistress Oh, it's a cultural thing.

flippinoptimist yeah, and i chose a human one

deputyheadmistress Alright. I read a little bit on that.

flippinoptimist because humans are neat and i like them

deputyheadmistress Oh! Well, I'm glad you like humans, then.

flippinoptimist and i respect a lot of the cultural things i see in most of the human places i have found

deputyheadmistress Good, I was about to ask that.

flippinoptimist also everything that comes out of japan is amazing

deputyheadmistress I don't know how I could let you use a wand from here, but I want to try.

flippinoptimist id love to try if you can think of a way! i am pretty good at establishing first contact with new universes, and i could get you alien tech and magic to check out if you wanted for various definitions of alien

deputyheadmistress ... Alien tech won't work so well on Hogwart's grounds. I had to heavily modify this computer so it'd function here.

flippinoptimist i am curious about how

flippinoptimist alllsooo....  ill have to find a copy of the magic version of getting around from place to place

deputyheadmistress Oh! I wrote a whole thesis on how to make magic more compatable with muggle text over the summer, let me...

flippinoptimist but i know where to find it!  couple of steps and itll work out okay

deputyheadmistress I'll send it to you later. It's a bit lengthy, and I have to type it up here. Alright, I'll hold.

flippinoptimist okay i hate to say this because i am definitely interested in exchangin data and showin things, but it feels rude not to remind you before we get much further that a step of getting this to work is probably going to involve me (random internet stranger) havin to figure out what your coordinates are, so i can write them in the format needed for the circley part i can get you the circle rune pattern either way, but if you want a way to actually use it, id need to basically track your IP but, like, fancy and involving you running a thing on a computer let me know if you want to do that part, but heres the circle diagram

flippinoptimist -- flippinoptimist began sending file : transportationcircle.pdf --

deputyheadmistress I have been warned about random internet strangers.... I may have to work on protection wards for a moment, for the sake of safety.

flippinoptimist sure thing i highly advise not using that w/o fillin in coordinates the way it says, and also not without knowin your home coordinates if you step through that thing, the only way back is to know how to write your home address, you know?

deputyheadmistress Alright

flippinoptimist to find home coordinates, install one a these chat programs, and send me a private message, i can use a couple a tools to trace the connection from there and get your code

deputyheadmistress This is certainly the sort of decision I want to be making at five in the morning. Alright, I've got everything set up. What is life without adventure, and the chance to make the headmistress mad at me.

flippinoptimist lol the decision will still be here at not five in the morning, but you wont be able to blame it on the time then shit i should give you the programs shouldnt i -- Discord, Trollian! --

deputyheadmistress Thank you.

flippinoptimist i have a set of coords i can give you that are explicitely for being a neutral place to meet people, but the sky isnt done yet so its janky lookin but!  the building is finished

deputyheadmistress I've chosen a fairly neutral place for the moment, don't worry.

flippinoptimist ok!

deputyheadmistress > Message him on Discord. This will be absolutely fine. Totally.

flippinoptimist > He messages her back!  About two minutes later, he gives her the number version of her coordinates, which she can use to get back home from anywhere.  He also gives her the coordinates to the convenience store, which he mentions is "a pocket dimension under construction"

deputyheadmistress > She'll... Write that down and probably not do anything with it for a while. > If he tries to look at her coordinates directly, it will really really not work, as if his machine were glitching, but he can probably go a few miles out for a nice view of a scottish country side.

flippinoptimist > Neat!  He ..does poke that far, but then sets his machine to go back to looking somewhere else.  The coordinates are saved, but he promises to himself to not use them. if somebody gives you coordinates, you can go places, or people w/ yours can send you stuff or come visit

deputyheadmistress Alright. This is going to take a bit of getting used to, but if you want to come over you can.

flippinoptimist > ..man, he was supposed to be in time out, but lately he'd been doing so well ..until today.. and he'd been leaning into choosing the Chaotic choices more and more often... > What good was putting yourself in time out if you didn't stick to it?

flippinoptimist crazy o clock in the mornin probably aint the best time for first impressions, though its temptin as hell.  i could send across some small magic gunk and weird alien snacks as a proof of concept, and meet you like, tomorrow or another day soon?

deputyheadmistress That sounds good! I'll send you some magic things too, then.

flippinoptimist sweet!  we can compare notes

deputyheadmistress > Time to gather some of George's jokes and some magical candy.

flippinoptimist > He would send an invisibility ring, a few novelty disguises, a small opal that made anyone within line of sight experience a slightly sweet taste (in a well-shielded bag), and a variety of alternian mass-produced snackfoods labled in a clearly alien language.  Ones he thought might not creep out humans too bad.

deputyheadmistress > Bertie botts every flavor beans are a necessity, though she does make sure to include a carefully penned note about what flavors he may come across that are less pleasant. Chocolate frogs are included as well, of course. Things that turn skin different interesting colors, fireworks that make flame animals bound through the air.

flippinoptimist > He is going to admire the hell out of and carefully store these for later perusal.

deputyheadmistress > He also gets a somewhat large coinpurse that he can shove his whole arm in and still seem to not run out of room.

flippinoptimist okay this is a pretty neat bag stupid question and no i am not going ot try, what happens when you turn it inside out

deputyheadmistress You could turn it out for a really long time. I think it'd be annoying to stuff it back in though

flippinoptimist okay, what if i went for a swim in the ocean with it is there a limit?

deputyheadmistress Of course there's a limit. But it can hold a tent or two, several thin blankets, changes of clothing, general everyday use things, and of course money. Thin things work better, obviously. You could probably fit thick blankets, but it'd be way more annoying both to put them in and pull them out.

flippinoptimist that makes a lotta sense and is pretty interestin i have a tech way of carrying lots of stuff, but you mentioned tech was sad

deputyheadmistress Oh! I have a print version of the paper I was going to type up.

flippinoptimist ive got an amulet thats basically like a mr potato head that disguises you all the runework lines up so you can unclip parts and clip in different parts

deputyheadmistress > Send that along, also. There's moving pictures involved, with her pictured. Oh wow.

flippinoptimist modular!

deputyheadmistress I don't think describing it as 'Mr Potato Head' is reassuring, for a disguise, but a modular disguise is interesting.

flippinoptimist it only works when everything is seated in firmly and shut, but its also sort of like legos > He .. sends a modular disguise amulet over too, with a couple of bits and pieces it only does disguises for my species, but hey, maybe thatll be handy

deputyheadmistress Maybe.

flippinoptimist pro tip if you are ever going to go to a place with my species, ask them which color of person is best for you to be can of worms subject really

deputyheadmistress That sounds racist as hell.

flippinoptimist oh yeah

deputyheadmistress Joy.

flippinoptimist p much sometides people call the usual empress "fish hitler" most of the dudes i know are huge rebels

deputyheadmistress The magical world just recently got done with a war similar to Hitler's.

flippinoptimist but!  there are placeswhere things are fine its just good to check if a place is one of them first

deputyheadmistress So I'm a little sick of that.

flippinoptimist i hang out in like three different places where she got deposed differentamounts of time ago yeah thats aight

deputyheadmistress At least there's that.

flippinoptimist speaking of humans, its great how often its naut like that like, sometimes, but anyway people can be pretty cool when teyre given teh chance

deputyheadmistress I do like to believe in the inherent goodness of people, despite how much bad has happened.

flippinoptimist i think people can choose how theyre gonna be theresa lotta nice reasons to choose not to be a dick

deputyheadmistress I should hope you wouldn't need reasons, but yes there are reasons to be nice.

flippinoptimist sometimes bein mean is tempting, otherwise people wouldnt do it you get all wrapped up in somethin, dont see all of it, then suddenly you get a reality check an gotta go "hey is this where i wanna be" and then people ignore the question because they dont wanna think about it and then its sealed, theyre dicks and theyll stay that way

flippinoptimist till they look around again

deputyheadmistress I suppose.

flippinoptimist i spend a lotta time thinkin about it i was a jerk when i was younger, and i decided to be nice instead so i spend a lot of time talkin to dudes who are or were also jerks and we all get better! cause i can help them find the reasons they need to start

flippinoptimist also jerks are sometimes kinda hilarious, and theyre often pretty good at shit.  otherwise theyd have learned better when they ran into a problem they couldnt solve w/o help.

deputyheadmistress It's getting a bit late. I think I should probably turn in for the night, before all of the teenagers wake up and need scowling at.

flippinoptimist that is probably a thing i hope you have a good night miss granger it was nice meetin you

deputyheadmistress It was really interesting talking to you, Vel.

flippinoptimist i try for interestin

deputyheadmistress Do you really need to try?

flippinoptimist not really

deputyheadmistress Have a good night. I'll talk to you tomorrow.

flippinoptimist bye!

[therealwriterinblack]

This is a somewhat updated version of my earlier On Belief post.

From time to time people make the statement “You can believe what you want.”  This is not the first time I have encountered that idea but it caused me to stop and think.

A classic example of this is Pascal’s Wager:  If you believe in God and are wrong, you lose nothing, but if you don’t believe and are wrong, you end up in Hell.  Thus, to be safe, it is best to believe.  Implicit in that is that one can simply choose whether or not to believe. Can people really simply choose to believe, or not believe, something?  Or put another way are there really people who can do that because I cannot.I cannot simply decide that, today, I am going to believe in invisible purple unicorns (and you “invisible pink unicorn” types are heretics), nor tomorrow that the purple unicorns have pink polka dots.  I cannot simply choose to believe that the Apollo shots, the Russian robotic sample return missions, and everything else were hoaxes and the Moon really is made of green cheese (despite appearances where a “white cheese” such as Parmesan would be a better fit).  And I cannot simply choose to believe that I’ve got an invisible friend in the sky who made everything and is controlling everything.

Is it a matter of practice?  Do I have to be like the White Queen and work my way up to “believe seven impossible things before breakfast”?  In any case, I can’t just choose to believe something.  I have to be convinced–evidence, logic, a good story, something.

One of the things that one has to understand about me is that I am a scientist both by profession and by inclination.  As a result, I take the position that there is an underlying reality to the Universe and that my job is to try as best I can to learn/understand what that reality might be.  Science, religion, philosophy, Zen Buddhism, all are approaches to attempt to comprehend that underlying reality.  These approaches may be better or worse at moving toward that comprehension (I submit that no one ever has, or probably ever will, completely obtain that comprehension).  They may be closer or wider of the mark.  But the goal is moving toward that comprehension.

Different people, at different times, may have seen parts of that underlying reality.  Others might have been mistaken by what they thought was that underlying reality.  To me, Asatru (More on this later) is the idea that the Germanic/Norse people saw a bit of that underlying reality a bit more clearly than others such that the Germanic/Norse deities are at least a partial description of real powers in the Universe (or possibly a “meta-Universe” of which our observable Universe is but a part).  I do not know if this is so or not.  It might be true, or might not.  But am willing to entertain the idea and explore it seeing if I can find evidence to support it–as I have done with other ideas in the past.

It’s possible that the underlying reality is, in some manner, shaped by our beliefs (I don’t say it’s likely, but it’s possible).  It’s also possible that that underlying reality is supremely indifferent to what or how we believe.  Either way, it is what it is and we seek to find that “what is”.  I find, for the most part, that I approach from the perspective of science (look for patterns, try to determine a “rule” for the pattern, compute what must happen or must not happen if the rule is true, look to see if it does or does not. Boiled down to “how do we know if we’re wrong” and then go look) because I have found it very effective at sorting wheat from chaff as it were.  OTOH, I’ve encountered things that I cannot explain with my current understanding of science and so recognize that there are things that my current understanding of the world, obtained through science, is far from complete.

As Shakespeare put into the mouth of Hamlet, “There are more things in Heaven and Earth than are dreamed of in your philosophy, Horatio.” That, of course, does not mean that any particular fancy one might come up with is one of those “things” and, in fact,  that’s not the way to bet.  As big as the Universe is, it is only (so far as we can tell) one but the possible “might be’s” are endless.  There are simply more ways to be wrong than there are to be right.  Still, our knowledge, both as a species and as individuals, of the way the Universe is is incomplete and we do well to remember that.

One example of the “incomplete” nature of my, personal, understanding comes from my training in the Martial Arts.  Over the years I have studied several martial arts.  One of them was “Togakure-Ryu Ninjutsu” as popularized in the US by Stephen K. Hayes. (I know.  I know.  It was a passing phase, okay.  And not without its benefits even so.)

One part of that training was various “sensitivity drills” designed to open us up to “energies” (quotes because these “energies” do not meet the definition of energy that I know as a physicist) beyond those accessible to our normal senses.  One day, we did a particular drill which involved standing in a circle, about 20 feet across facing away from the center.  One member of the group would stand in the center holding a wooden “training pistol.” He would point the pistol at one of the people at random in the circle and focus his attention on that person as if he meant to attack him.  We were supposed to “feel” the intent and, when we felt it, pivot to face the person in the center.

During the course of the exercise I felt “twitchy” and would jerk my shoulders as if I were about to turn but then I’d go back to my original position.  Then, after several minutes, without any conscious intent on my part I found myself facing the center and there the person was, pointing the wooden gun right at me.

I’m well aware of the kinds of things where a person might pick up on something without realizing it:  seeing a reflection, feeling air pressure from the motion or breath of the person involved, hearing movement, that sort of thing.  There were no reflective objects in the training area.  At a distance of 10 feet I don’t think I would have felt any slight breeze from his motion or his breath, certainly not to the extent of being able to discriminate between his pointing at me or at the next person over.  “Targets” weren’t chosen in sequence so I couldn’t just spot the person next to me turning and know that I’m next.

Was there something that simply cued my physical senses at a “subconscious level” telling me that that was the time to turn?  I don’t know.  I’ve eliminated the obvious ones but who knows what might have been there that I don’t know about.  Or could it have been something else, something that goes beyond, sight, sound, taste, touch, and smell?  I don’t know.

Now, many of my beliefs, the ones that make up “me”, were formed when I was very young.  I believe that falling down hurts because I’ve fallen down a lot and, sure enough, it hurt.  But a lot of my beliefs aren’t so prosaic.  I believe many of the things I believe simply because that’s the way I was brought up in my “formative years” and taught whether by precept or by example, that that’s the way things are, taught by people I had reason to trust (teachers at school, parents, and so forth).  These beliefs are not always logical.  They are not always well supported by evidence.  And the experience may simply be that they’re the ways I saw and I didn’t see other ways.There is a certain reasonableness in believing what one is taught from youth.  Parents, teachers, and to a lesser extent peers, are all people one has reason to trust to some extent.  When all, or even most, of them tell you a thing over the course of years it is natural, it is reasonable, to believe it.  It is not always right, but it is reasonable.  Without new evidence or argument of some sort it appears far less reasonable to pick up a new belief.  If one decides that one cannot accept, cannot believe in, the God with which one was raised, it is not reasonable to simply decide, arbitrarily, that one is going to believe in a flying spaghetti monster, at least it is not for me.  And so I look for experience, evidence, and argument and logic before accepting new beliefs.

An example is religion.  I was raised in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints (LDS or Mormon).  Now, the Church has many beliefs but one of the ones that was endemic to my teaching (whether official Church doctrine or not) was Young Earth Creationism, well, slightly modified Young Earth Creationism since one of the Church’s scriptural books “The Pearl of Great Price” contains a description of a planet “Kolob” described as being nearest to “heaven” and for which a single day was 1000 Earth years.  So the “six days” of Creation could have been 6000 years.  However, as I started learning more about science, particularly geology and biology, I learned of a huge body of evidence that the Earth was far older than what I had been taught.

One small piece of that body of evidence was the existence of what geologists call angular unconformities.  This is a case where rock layers, originally horizontal and flat, had been bent or tilted by geologic forces, partially weathered away, and then new layers of sediment laid on top of it to be gradually compressed into rock(1).  This process, to occur naturally, would take a long time indeed, far too long to happen were the Earth only a few thousand years old.

Example of Angular Unconformity

How Angular Unconformities are made.

And so, once I started questioning my previously unexamined belief in Young Earth Creationism, I started looking at the totality of my belief in the LDS religion and I soon found that I just didn’t believe it any more.  Too much contradicted the evidence that was available to me.

That did not, however, mean that I was simply going to grab onto any other belief that came my way.  Nor was I going to exclude the possibility of things beyond my understanding, things that could include a “God” or “Gods.” Loss of belief in something does not automatically mean belief in its opposite.  It did, however, put me in a position to consider different beliefs.  I looked at Wicca for a while.  While I do not doubt that many are sincere in their beliefs, I did not find the evidence to support those beliefs compelling.  Nor did I find the idea of reincarnation particularly appealing when I look at the world, do the numbers, and figure the odds of being reborn to a situation better than my current one.  That does not mean it isn’t true–“appealing” and “true” have no necessary relationship–but appealing or not, I did not find the evidence as presented to be compelling.

I looked at Buddhism, Shinto, Hinduism, and various neo-Pagans.  I also looked at various forms of Christianity.  Oh, and I took a brief look at Islam.  I found none of them particularly convincing.  And so my agnosticism remains.

People have tried to present me with what they saw as evidence.  I have had fundamentalist Christians who have invited me to their Church to see people speaking in tongues and the like which, they believed, would convince me of the reality of their version of the Christian God.  They did not appreciate that I could point them to studies on “religious ecstasy” which showed similar effects in a wide variety of contexts and, since it is not limited to their religion is therefore not strong evidence for any particular religious belief.  Others have pointed me to people who have “died and come back” (technically a “near death experience”), but I can point to the work of Dr. Susan Blackmore and others on the neuroscience involved and how the typical “near death” effects can be shown to stem from the biological structure of the brain.

And so my agnosticism remains.

I continued to search in part because humans have a need within them–whether evolutionary or otherwise–for ritual and symbolism.  I did not find anything I could truly believe in but, I did find one form of religion immensely appealing:  Asatru.  As part of my exploration, I read Diane Paxson’s “Essential Asatru” and Greg Shelter’s “Living Asatru” (I have since lost my copy of Shelter’s book and would dearly love to have both of those as ebooks).  One of the things I found most compelling is the idea that “wyrd” is something you build out of accumulated “orlogg.” In short, sin and punishment are not there because of some arbitrary “God says so” but rather are simply the natural result of the accumulation of ones actions.  I also found the “Nine Noble Virtues” which strike me as a far better model for a “good life” than the Ten Commandments (half of which amount to “stroke God’s ego.”) Oh, and it became clear from my readings that these gods, if they did exist, were supremely indifferent to whether or not anyone believed in them.  They didn’t care what you believed.  They only cared what you did.  If a non-believer is looking for a source for ritual and symbolism, what better than in a religion where the gods don’t care whether you believe?

These and other reasons made Asatru very appealing to me.  While being appealing is not, in itself, enough to be convincing for me, it was enough for me to see about giving the practice a chance.  Perhaps, if I gave the religion a chance, the Gods, if they exist, would see fit to provide me with evidence that would convince.

One chance for that came when one of our dogs, a six-month-old puppy, was very sick and was not expected to live much longer.  You have to understand, I am very much a “dog person.” While I’m fond enough of cats, my worship of the canine stops short of idolatry…barely.  Dogs aren’t just “pets” to me they are “furkids” (picked up that term from our regular pet sitter).  My daughter (eight years old at the time of the events–five years ago as of this writing) also loves our dogs dearly.  Now, add to that that we had only shortly before these events lost an old and beloved family pet (who I truly hope is awaiting me at “Rainbow Bridge”) and you see that this was a very traumatic event for our family.  I decided to make an effort.  I purchased a four lb “Engineers Mallet” (similar, in my conception, to what Mjolnir would be) carved Thor’s name into it in Elder Furthank, anointed it with some of my own blood, and sacrificed it into a large nearby body of water asking Thor, if he existed, to “hold his hammer between Trunks and harm” and to intercede with Eir, who Snorri described as the best of physicians among the Gods to grant Trunks healing.  I also offered a bottle of Guinness (Paxson said that “Stout” was a good offering for Thor) to Thor to that end.

Time passed.  Much to the surprise of everyone, including the vet, Trunks perked up and seemed to be healthy and happy.  A couple of months later, the vet said that the ultrasound techs were curious about what had happened since Trunks seemed to be doing so well.  They offered to do a follow-up ultrasound for free and the vet agreed.

The follow up ultrasound was completely normal.  The large internal abscess was gone.  The kidney irregularities were gone.  The spots on the spleen were gone.  I had a perfectly healthy young dog.

Did Thor intercede?  I do not know.  Human and animal bodies are complicated things and seeming miracles can happen from entirely natural causes.  On the other hand, I found the bottle (which I had left on the front porch, behind the railing) in the same place but empty.  Maybe somebody came along and drank it the put the bottle back.  My daughter said that maybe Thor accepted the offering and came and drank it.  I offered another bottle as thanks on the possibility that maybe Thor is real and had accepted the first offering.  That one was found later, in the same place, about half empty.

And five years later, a dog that we truly believed we were on a “death watch” for is still with us, healthy, happy, and active.

So it could be.  By itself, it’s not enough for me to truly believe.  There are other possibilities (including that I’m underestimating how long it would take for the drink to evaporate).  But it’s a start and enough for me to continue my exploration of Asatru.  Who knows, perhaps in time, bits and pieces will come together enough until I find that I truly believe and am no longer simply exploring.

One of my core beliefs is that there is an underlying truth to the Universe. At some level, what is, is, and what is not, is not. Anything else is chaos. And as a scientist I want to know and understand as much as I can of that underlying truth. If part of that truth is that Odin and Thor (by whatever name) are real beings, than I want to know that. If there is something more to human “being” than electrochemical reactions in the complex neurological structure of the brain, I want to know that.

And if none of that is true. Well, while I might be less happy with that knowledge, I still want to know. My quest is for “truth”, whatever it might be. I’m willing to entertain possibilities outside the “conventional” (see above) but in the end, I want to know what is.

Belief is not the same thing as proof. However, even belief, at least for me, has to have something behind it beyond just blind speculation. I don’t believe in invisible pink unicorns or flying spaghetti monsters. I do believe in “dark matter” even though I haven’t observed it and the evidence is rather abstract and mathematical. I don’t need proof to believe, but I do need something to go on.

On Belief Redux This is a somewhat updated version of my earlier On Belief post. From time to time people make the statement “You can believe what you want.”  This is not the first time I have encountered that idea but it caused me to stop and think.