#he/him pins bc being out as a guy is somewhat easier for me than being out as a nonbinary-guy-ish.

[autism-corner]

i ordered some pronoun pins from an etsy shop and they arrived fine and well.... except for a the fact that a month later the same exact pins were delivered to me. again. so ive gotten twice the pins :(

[hermannsthumb]

Okay but what about Hermann is just horny 24/7, but he's repressing his feelings. And Newt who sees it and maybe is enjoying a bit. And one day Newt just pins Hermann to a lab wall, ties his arms with a belt or sleeves of his shirt and teases Hermann until he melts in his hands. And Newt murmurs to Hermann something like "sweetheart, you could have just said.." This thought makes me DEAD

a fic! somewhat obviously rated 18+/not for kids' eyes!!!!! so all hidden below the cut, lmfao. dedicated to people on side twitter bc boy do I love some light d/s + nerm

It’s not like Newt’s never looked at Hermann before. Look-looked, in like, a sexy, considering way. It gets lonely in the lab with just the two of them, after all, and usually Hermann is the only face Newt will see for hours, days, one memorable occasion when they were super-swamped with work, a week. His face is the only one that comes to mind when Newt wants to have sexy thoughts for that reason—it’s just, like, easier and takes less imagination to masturbate to the thought of the guy you see every day than anyone else. And Hermann is kind of hot, Newt guesses, in a weird, repressed nerd kind of way. He thinks it has something to do with not knowing what Hermann's bothering to repress so bad. Maybe he's got a hot bod under all those layers or sucks dick like a porn star or something. Or he's hiding how horny he is all the time and would love nothing more than to cut loose for once. (Newt would be happy to take one for the team!) It's gotta be that, because Newt can't imagine why else the thought of Hermann—scowling and hunching over a chalkboard in one of his god-awful tweed blazers—gets him so goddamn riled up every time he sticks his hand down his pants.

Whatever the appeal is, Newt's masturbatory fantasies tend to tilt towards very particular (and well-loved) scenarios: Hermann finally gets fed up with Newt’s obnoxious behavior and shoves him against a wall to teach him a lesson, or Hermann holds Newt down on a bed or the lab couch or the floor and has his way with him to teach him a lesson, or Hermann grips Newt’s shoulders and uses his mouth in any way he sees fit to teach him a lesson. Newt's real into the idea of Hermann being in control. Or, in other words, Hermann doing the doing, Newt doing the taking. Not that Newt is adverse to topping. He'd be down for it if Hermann was. (And not that Newt spends a lot of time considering what Hermann is down for, and whether or not letting Newt top him is on that list, but yeah, Newt does kind of hope it would be.)

He's just...always assumed Hermann would want things that way. Newt's kind of assumed that he would want them that way, too.

All of his preconceived sexy notions about Hermann come crashing down around him one completely ordinary day in the lab.

It happens in a flash, too. A couple of seconds max. Hermann is over in Newt's space (he flagrantly disobeys the tape line more than Newt does, no matter what he may claim), shouting at him about something dumb and waving his cane around for dramatic effect. Only he's not looking where he's waving it, and the end of it comes into contact with a vial of some somewhat lethal weird kaiju gland extract that Newt's been planning on experimenting with this week, and the whole thing fuckin' shatters. "Shit!" Newt says, at the same time Hermann says "Bugger," and, before Newt knows it, Hermann's reaching out to save a pile of Newt's lab notes from certain kaiju gland death.

Which is royally stupid of him. That stuff is already eating through Newt's wooden work bench like it's nothing—God knows what it'd do to Hermann's skin. Newt's messy notes are not worth it.

"Dude, no," Newt exclaims, and grabs Hermann's wrist to stop him.

And Hermann...moans.

They stare at each other. The kaiju gland extract drips to the metal floor, where it sizzles harmlessly.

Hermann pulls his arm away.

"Clean this up," he snaps. He turns heel and storms out, giving Newt a spectacular view of the fiery red flush spreading down the back of his neck.

Huh, Newt thinks. That's something new.

-----

"I'm not some sort of sexual deviant," Hermann assures him. "I have. Er. Entirely respectable—tastes. Typically."

"Uh-huh," Newt says.

"Only this is quite out of character for me," Hermann says.

Newt pulls his tie taut around Hermann's wrists to watch Hermann squirm and grins, just a little, before knotting it loosely. "No offense, Hermann," he says, "but bondage isn't exactly hardcore. Besides, it's fine if you like out-there kinda stuff. No judgement."

“But I don’t,” Hermann says.

“I’m not saying you do,” Newt says, “I’m saying—”

“And this isn’t bondage.” Hermann sniffs. “Bondage sounds—”

"Look, dude, do I need to gag you?" Newt jokes.

Except Hermann maybe doesn't get the joke: his eyes widen, and mouth hangs open. Not exactly the shouty, loud response and demand for respect Newt was expecting. Also something new. Newt's learning a lot of very, very unexpected things about Hermann, and part of him wishes he had a notebook or his tape recorder on hand to take inventory of all of it. Subject A (Hermann Gottlieb) likes having his wrists pinned and his big dumb mouth shut up. Conclusion: ? "I—I beg your pardon?" Hermann says.

Today marks a week after the kaiju gland incident. A week of furtive glances across the tape line, Hermann's badly-hidden blushes, and Newt reevaluating every single goddamn thing he's ever thought or assumed about the guy (and himself, to be honest), and Newt was finally the one to snap. In Newt's defense, it wasn't totally out of the blue. At lunch time an uncharacteristically quiet and bashful Hermann slid a cup of coffee onto Newt's desk, mumbling something about how Newt really needed to get more sleep, and Newt just...

Hermann didn't moan when Newt grabbed his wrists that time; his tongue darted out over his lips, and he looked at Newt through the dark eyelashes of his half-mast eyelids. "Please," he had said.

Newt gets why Hermann was being so weird and cagey about it, he really does. It’s hard to admit to yourself you want something kinda embarrassing, and Newt knows it’s just as embarrassing for Hermann to like him as it is for Newt to like Hermann. Newt’s weird, and small, and probably smells bad, and Hermann’s weird, and smells bad (cigarette smoke and moth-eaten sweaters, but Newt jerks off to it anyway, huh, doesn't he), and is slightly not as small. But holy shit, if he didn’t melt into a puddle when Hermann breathed that out all desperately, like it took all he had.

“Do you want me to gag you?” Newt says.

He’s using the skinny tie Hermann claims to hate so much on his wrists, or he might’ve seriously balled up the fabric and shoved it into Hermann’s mouth. There’s not much else in the way of gags readily on hand in the lab, no fabric scraps or anything like that. Maybe they’ll try it later. He kisses Hermann instead, slipping his tongue past those open lips, and Hermann parts them wider with a throaty groan. "Ah, Newton—"

Newt didn’t really expect their first kiss to go like this. He didn’t expect their first kiss to, like, happen in the first place, but it’s especially weird that it’s happening while Hermann is bound up and pressed up against his chalkboard. Newt's been keeping an eye on Hermann's leg, careful of any sign that it's going to give out and that they should move this to the couch, but Newt's knee between both of Hermann's seems to be all the support he needs. “I’m here, dude,” he says, and slips down to press a gentle kiss to Hermann’s jaw instead, then his neck. Hermann tilts his head back with another groan; he flexes against his restraints.

Is Newt the first person Hermann's ever done this with? Or trusted enough to tell he wants to do this?

The possibility kinda just makes this all hotter to Newt. He drags the tips of his fingers up Hermann's chest, feeling his heart pound through the thick layers of his button-down and sweatervest, and drags them back down. He stops just at Hermann's bound wrists. Hermann groans softly. "Do you want me to touch you more?" Newt says.

"Please," Hermann says, "ah, please, Newton—"

Newt does, smiling as he curls up on the toes of his boots and presses another kiss to Hermann's mouth. His right hand, he uses to ruck up Hermann's sweatervest and dig under his shirt; his left hand, he curls the fingers of in Hermann's skinny tie bindings to tug sharply. Hermann's chest is bony and warm beneath his palm. His heart is beating faster, and faster. "Please," Hermann begs again, and this time when Newt kisses him, he sags against Newt helplessly.

"Hermann," Newt murmurs. Hermann's breath is fogging up his glasses and making it difficult for him to see. Which is a goddamn shame, because Newt wants to, like, memorize the image of a flushed and panting and begging Hermann, tattoo it to his skin forever as a reminder of today, a whole big splash of color on his back where he was planning on putting another kaiju. Yeah, Newt takes back what he said earlier, Hermann isn't just kinda hot—he's very hot. He drags his tongue over Hermann's pulse point, and says, just as gently, "Hermann, you could've just said."

Newt would've done anything for Hermann when he grabbed Hermann's wrists and Hermann breathed out a simple please, and Newt would do anything for Hermann now. Newt would get every single tattoo removed if it meant making Hermann happy. He bites down on the sweaty, pale skin of Hermann's neck, unable to hold back a moan of his own when Hermann's whole body writhes with it, and shoves his hand down Hermann's oversized slacks.

"I want you to come," Newt mumbles, rubbing at him furiously, "I want you to come, I wanna make you come, I wanna—"

Hermann muffles his cry in Newt's shoulder when he does. Newt waits until he's stopped shaking to untie his wrists carefully, and isn't surprised when Hermann immediately grabs Newt's shoulders to steady himself. (Hermann thighs are still trembling from the awesome orgasm Newt gave him. It's pretty hot. But also, Newt should probably grab his cane for him.) "You—you've made a terrific mess of me," Hermann sniffs, vaguely annoyed, like he's reprimanding Newt for knocking a piece of kaiju intestine on the floor again.

Newt decides not to mention to Hermann that he kinda soaked the knee of Newt's jeans, too. He can do laundry later. "Sorry, man," Newt says, but Hermann gives another, happier sniff when Newt kisses his cheek. "I'll take care of it."

[radiantmists]

row part one thoughts

So I’m done with part one! this got super freaking long, so readmore:

Navani focus! I am so very happy about this, y’all have no idea. And given that the fused are going to strike at the tower, specifically to mess with the very fabrial Navani wants to fix, she’s going to do something amazing. 

Also, I don’t have to worry about her living to the end, or the tower being lost, because the epigraphs for part one seem very likely to take place after the events of the book.

I do have to worry about Kaladin, especially because I really don’t think spending more time around Lirin is actually going to help his mental state. 

That being said, I did enjoy the evidence that he was excited about his parents moving in-- the idea of him and Syl picking out toys for Oroden is so sweet. I’m excited to see him spending time with Oroden and his mom.

I’m less excited that Shallan and Adolin are leaving without him; I get why sending him on the honorspren expedition is a bad idea, but it seems like the parts of his support system that are adapted to his current situation, as opposed to his parents who are used to him as a child, have been systematically stripped away (Rock leaving, Windrunners deployed in Azir, etc).

I continue to be super interested in what Brandon’s doing with Rlain-- he still hasn’t been able to draw in Stormlight, and he refuses to bond with a spren who’s been coerced. I hope he ends up with a spren anyway; we know it’s possible from Venli, so the honorspren just have to stop being assholes.

I initially thought that Kaladin only ordered the grouchy honorspren to consider Rlain, not to bond him, and I kinda agree that he shouldn’t be allowed to threaten a spren into bonding someone; he knows how much they hate being trapped.

Which brings me back to Navani being threatened. Who could have had the chance to smuggle the spanreed ruby into her box? My immediate prediction would be the Mink, who goes missing with incredible ease, but we really don’t know enough about him at this point to guess. 

Second question, what ‘new fabrials’ does she need to stop making? It has to be a big deal, something she’s known for; it has to be conceivably causing suffering to someone. I do wonder if maybe it’s just the ones with spren trapped in the physical realm, instead of Cognitive, but Navani definitely didn’t invent this procedure-- why would they be holding her responsible?

Another possibility is that whatever Gavilar was doing has been pinned on her, which would make sense-- she’s known to be an artifabrian, whereas almost no one really knew what he was doing.

Almost no one-- Nale and another male herald (who I think by elimination has to be Kalak?) probably know the most. Nalan probably wont be helpful, though he’s promised to come teach Szeth Division at some point.

(Also, it’s hilarious that we all were wondering what relations were going to be like between Szeth and everyone else, and they just put him in jail. Navani’s encounter with him was wonderfully chilling, and true to the way he’s depicted in books 1 and 2. We like his antics with Nightblood, but he’s very much not stable and his reasons for switching sides don’t make any goddamn sense, tbh.)

On the other hand, we do have two heralds who are giving as much information as they’re capable of! Which doesn’t seem to be much, given that Taln is incoherent and Ash apparently doesn’t know anything. But still, it seems like several of our fonts of ancient wisdom have become very forthcoming, which is. So exciting. 

Wit’s only talking to Jasnah who also likes keeping secrets so who knows if we’ll actually get to hear any. Navani’s perspective on him is interesting, and I wonder why no one seems to have told her how clear he’s made it that he is actually something ancient-- Dalinar, Shallan, and Kaladin all seem to know. 

I also wonder who (if anyone) knows he’s a Lightweaver now. I continue to worry about what Hoid is planning on doing with all the forms of Investiture he’s collecting, but we didn’t get much info on him here.

Except Vasher seems to know a fair bit about him! Vasher wins the award for most useful worldhopper in this part. Like, guys, he explained the Returned. He didn’t even just explain it in a way that was confusing in-world but made sense to readers-- he explained it in a way that Kaladin, who knows very little about the wider cosmere, could understand. 

I do appreciate that it’s made clear that he figured out this stuff himself, and that his understanding could be (and has been) flawed. Still, we now have a workman’s understanding of basically all forms of immortality and resurrection thanks to him, which is fucking amazing, yall.

The other big sharer of this part: Mraize. We finally get some insight into one thing the Ghostbloods want-- a way to transfer Stormlight off-world. We’ve long known that the Ghostbloods were among the most organized worldhopping powers active in Stormlight-- for all we know the 17th shard is still hanging out in the purelake-- but this gives them an interesting context. They’re vaguely opposed to Odium but they don’t seem to care all that much, as long as their goals for power and/or economic fulfillment work out. Beyond that things aren’t clear. Yet

Which brings us to Shallan!

If she fucks this up and doesnt get the answers Mraize promised I will scream.

She’s become fairly stable, and also remarkably open about her alters. I think it’s kind of interesting that Kaladin is in the know but her brothers aren’t-- no matter how much she loves and cares for them, their lives are pretty clearly separate.

I’m pretty annoyed that she hasn’t told Adolin about the Ghostbloods, honestly; she really wouldnt have to explain much of her past to explain that she’s investigating them, and I really don’t think Adolin would take it badly. I mean, I don’t think Adolin would take any of Shallan’s past too badly, but I imagine her infiltrating a secret society wouldn’t even register for him.

I’m curious to see how the trip to see the honorspren is going to develop them and their relationship; Kaladin’s not going, so the love triangle is probably going to continue not to be an issue despite Adolin expressing worry about Veil straying, which, thank fuck for that.

Adolin rebelling against Dalinar is great-- I love how Kaladin notes that Adolin isn’t following the codes with religiousness anymore, but he’s ‘found his own balance.’ I’m a bit concerned that Brandon is going to write this as a problem, instead of something fair and natural; while I do think Adolin does have to come to terms with things a bit, he needed to stop hero-worshipping Dalinar and it’s good that it happened.

He’s clearly excited to go to Shadesmar so that he can talk to Maya more, so that will be a big part of things, which will be nice. I do wonder what exactly Shallan will be doing during the travel-y parts of this, though I imagine negotiating Shadesmar won’t be simple even if it won’t be as chaotic as last time.

(It is vaguely hilarious to me that they’re sending the couple who are bonded to a cryptic and a deadeye to meet with the honorspren and apologize for the Recreance. How could this possibly go wrong.)

I’m not super sure what to say about Venli’s plotline? It’s super interesting, I love the complex political hierarchy of the Fused and the way Leshwi deliberately is lower in status bc the position gives her more latitude. (Though it’s not clear to me how this status is determined.)

I like that Venli isn’t just joining up with the humans; I was excited about the possibility but I guess it would feel cheap. She seems somewhat aware that the Fused won’t just let her get what they want-- and more cognizant than Leshwi that they wont just fade away if the war ends-- but I’m not sure I see how exactly she’s going to go forward from here.

She is going to help the Fused trying to infiltrate the tower. Raboniel is experimenting with spren somehow, and Venli can see into the Cognitive Realm with ease; that should be interesting.

(Sidenote, Raboniel reminds me heavily of Semirhage, and the Pursuer reminds me of Demandred. I can’t imagine Brandon is totally unconscious of the parallels, especially given that these are his “dark one’s” constantly-resurrected leaders, and I think that’s fun)

Leshwi is also worried about humans learning to trap the fused, or perhaps all singers, the way they did the unmade. I am also worried about this, as it seems like a temptingly effective but also horrific solution to the issue of the constant resurrection of the fused. 

The most promising thing about Venli’s storyline is that she might make it easier to reach a resolution to this whole series that doesn’t require the extermination of one side, which I have some faith Brandon wouldn’t do.

(It’s hilarious to me that they just yeeted Nergaoul into the ocean, especially considering that you can see trapped spren in shadesmar somehow, and oceans there are land.)

In any case, Venli is going to collide with the tower squad soon enough, probably by the end of the book, and I’m excited.

I hope this doesn’t end with Rlain defecting away from the humans and to her, though that would be understandable especially given his inability to fully integrate with the Windrunners.

Sundry other things-- I wonder if Navani’s drive to understand will help her deal with Re-Shephir, who to my understanding is still lurking in the depths of the tower somewhere? It’s interesting to me that trapping the unmade doesn’t seem to actually require any radiant powers.

My other theory, which I’d been developing over the course of rereading the last couple parts of Oathbringer, is that the ninth unmade is the Sibling, and that it would have to be reawakened, possibly cleansed somehow, and possibly re-imprisoned in the tower fabrial in order to make it work fully. The ‘resistance’ that Dalinar describes in investing the tower seems to support this, at least to me.

I do wonder which Shard the sibling is aligned with; parallelism would suggest Odium, and this kinda makes sense if she’s something like the unmade, though how this would then allow her to repel void creatures i’m not sure.

(Huh, when did I decide the sibling was a she? I think the stormfather does call her that, although in that case why aren’t they the sister? Hmm...)

What does it mean that Wyndle figured out chairs? I’m genuinely fascinated.

Jasnah’s abolishing slavery!! This does more to endear her to me than literally anything she’s done in the past few books. I do anticipate a significant fight over this, especially since a throwaway line in Shallan’s first scene suggests that freeing the singers has actually caused a huge spike in the slave trade, as was predicted a couple books ago. I can’t wait for Kaladin to hear about it.

The Kholin’s don’t trust Taravangian; I’m a bit unclear as to how much the rest of the coalition actually knows about what he did, though my understanding is that it’s a nonzero amount. I’m actually a bit disappointed that he’s reached an agreement with Odium, as now rather than jockeying for the best position he’s just straight-up following instructions and trying to get Odium to win. He’s not trying to save as much of the world as possible anymore; all he can save now is Kharbranth.

I do wonder how he’s concealing his compassionate days now that everyone knows he’s a genius; it’s easy to pretend to be stupid when you’re smart, much harder to do the opposite. Maybe he just says he’s sick.

...That’s probably enough.

[transmogrified-benmaxwell]

Why did you choose those specific zodiacs for the characters?:O

Sorry this took so long to respond to, but exams and finals have really been beating the literal shit out of me! I’m still glad you asked anon because I have lots of thoughts on this! Here’s the post anon is referring to in case anyone wants to see who is who.

Dallas: I don’t have too much to say since he’s already a Taurus, naturally I do see him more as a Pisces. Pisces tend to be the more gentle and compassionate of the signs and also tend to be more fearful in general as they are sensitive. They have a self sacrificing nature so that others will love them and not leave them and sometimes they become overly emotional when unable to cope with certain situations (i.e. Dallas being mad about Malek leaving to go to college even though he knows its irrational, but then not bringing it up because he’s self sacrificing his feelings to not make Malek upset).

Malek: If Malek isn’t a Gemini I don’t know who is. Like, this boy is a social butterfly which most Gemini’s naturally are and people are drawn to him. More often than not, people are attracted to his duality of a personality which enables him to be both intellectual (bitch wants to major in Bio-Chem and something else like double majoring and in such INTENSE fields???? He’s a fucking GENIUS) and creative/artistic (uhm??? he can sing and play three fucking instruments and even draws a little like??) which tends to be a trait of the twins. He’s well-spoken (boi speaks 3 languages and knows ASL come on now) and is funny/witty which is another trait people tend to like him for and is what makes Gemini’s more sociable. However, a downfall to the Gemini’s vast thinking is the persons indecisiveness. Malek can’t even decide at first if he really likes Dallas or is just pitying him and then when the feelings get stronger he can’t decide to tell him or how to act and it creates lots of conflict and doubt. Gemini’s don’t always have the easiest relationships because of their indecisiveness which leads to nervousness and I think is reflected a lot in Malek’s feelings for Dallas.

 Poppy: I know a lot of people kind of associate bad feelings with Scorpio’s, I actually think Poppy represents a lot of the good qualities neglected by other people that Scorpios have! Poppy is loyal to death and is very secretive in all the right ways (she literally is seeing both of her very close friends pinning over one another but shes too loyal to disclose the others secret even if something good could come out of it). She’s a strong and powerful force to be reckoned with which is why I think a majority of the baseball team respects her. However, sometimes her overwhelming passion and power are what can cause her to get confrontational (I know Poppy and Dallas have had a few hashing outs that were ugly and this makes sense for the two signs as Poppy can get jealous and resentful while Dallas can be sensitive and overemotional which can make the signs clash occasionally). At the end of the day though, Poppy really just has an overly protective and passionate heart and like most Scorpios, just really freaking wants some love. 

Parker: I thought Parker might be a Taurus, but after reading about all the signs I really found him to be a Libra. Libra’s are naturally the peace keepers of the group and have an affinity for beauty and harmony. Maybe Parker doesn’t actually go out of his way to make peace, but his common neutrality towards situations (literally one post I remember is he’s just like “I love both cats and dogs can we all get along” when discussing who was a cat or dog person I think? it really solidified this idea) and choosing to recognize both sides helps everyone feel balanced and maybe even wanna get along even if it’s just for his sake (not that they all fight or anything that frequently?). Parker’s absolute adoration for nature and hiking and the outside makes sense with the Libra sign as they have a thing for peace and beauty which can both be seen in nature through Parker’s eyes. Also, his general charming sweet nature can totally be seen by everyone (uhm let us not forget how Shook Tyler was when Parker gave him the honey lemony thing with ease bc Parker is a sweetheart and even though he’s shy, he can lowkey be a charmer without knowing it). His downfalls are seen in the Libra sign as he’s prone to being able to see both sides to any situation, but this can leave him feeling voiceless as sometimes people have a black and white way of thinking. He often retreats and gives up when conflict arises and lets others voice over him, rather than actually giving his peacemaking opinions. I believe he’s also got a strong empathetic nature which can be a downfall when it leads him to being manipulated or guilted into believing things very easily. 

Ben: Hmm Ben was harder as I don’t have too much information on my boi yet, but I found him to be like a Sagittarius because of his good humor and natural friendliness. Everyone likes him and everyones his friend because we’re all attracted to his humorous nature and positive outlook on most situations, however, I think maybe this is what can cause him to repress lots of his feelings. His willingness to be positive for others and neglect his personal needs can cause him to ignore his own feelings to make sure he isn’t bringing anyone down? I’m not sure, I’d have to know more and so this is my guess, but if this is it then he’s likely a Sagittarius as they often forget to tend to their own needs when trying to be sunshine for everyone else and never wanting to lose the positivity their friends/family bring them.

Blake: Aside from Malek’s, I think Blake’s was the easiest sign to critically evaluate and put out there because he’s so OBVIOUSLY a freaking Cancer. Those under the Cancer sign are absolute softies and are so freaking lovable, but sadly, you can only see this side of the sign if you get close enough to break through their hard, grumpy outer layer. More often than not, Cancer’s have a hard time expressing their real emotions and this can partially explain Blake’s “I hate everyone” personality because it’s so much easier to pretend he hates everyone else when really he just can’t talk about how much he hates himself. This can also help explain Blake having negative feelings towards Dallas because Dallas is more sensitive and isn’t quite on the same level of hiding emotions as Blake is and how Blake might see it as is, here is this kid who’s open (somewhat) about his feelings which is pathetic and is loved more than he is meanwhile Blake’s putting all his emotions and feelings in the closet to not burden those around him and he’s regarded as an asshole. Another downfall of the Cancer sign that Blake has is his clinginess because afterall, once he finds someone he can actually open up to, it’s hard for him to ever want to let go of the one person that brings that out of him. This can really make him look like a needy, grumpy jerk, but honestly this boi just wants some love and relief my guys. Just some more little things, Cancer signs are so imaginative and loving/protective and this can be seen in his love for theater and literature, and his way of treating those he’s especially close close to.

Tyler: Lmao lowkey made Tyler a Taurus because it’s got a very nice compatibility with the Cancer sign and I’m Gay™, but also not the only reason. The Taurus sign is a stubborn one, much like the Bull that represents it. This can be both good and bad as he’s stubborn when it comes to arguing and fighting, but this can be great when the person of the sign is on your side of things as they are fiercely loyal and willing to be patient with those willing to try and he’s very reliable. This is kinda shown in Tyler’s friendship (hhMMMM 👀) with Blake as he stubbornly cares about Blake despite his negative tendencies and stays loyally by his side. This somewhat leads to Tyler enabling Blake as once said in a post, but Tyler can’t help it under the Taurus sign because once he’s become attached he’ll do whatever he can to make his partner happy (even if it’s not always by the best means). This can lead to some self sacrificing which the Taurus sign will happily do (only if they want to though, never by force they are too stubborn for that) and kinda explains why Tyler enables Blake despite his better opinion and sacrifices being batter so that Blake can. Much like the Taurus sign he craves stability and some kind of routine, but also too much can be boring.

Phoebus: Okay don’t judge me for this but essentially, my first reasoning for making Phoebus an Aries was because I saw this pun about Aries signs that always “ram” through their problems LOL and it led me to just think this is how Phoebus battled through his osteosarcoma. Literally just slammed his head at test results in doctors offices until they changed to healthier ones. Aside from that idiotic note, Phoebus is witty and confident much like the Aries sign which is what causes him to clash with Malek when he acts all foolhardy and shit. If Malek and him could stop being so competitive, you’d actually find they’d be pretty compatible friends (or lovers???). He’s energetic and full of an adventurous attitude which will likely lead our poor mans in trouble. RIP

Dev: I don’t really know, in a lot of ways Dev just kinda reminds me of Malek and this leads me to connect them as Gemini bros. Dev is charismatic and a social butterfly and those are some high characteristics of the Gemini sign since they’re supposed to be the best communicators. 

Noah: I solely made Noah a Leo because Leo’s tend to have an almost pretentious nature around them as they tend to think highly of themselves (not all Leo’s, lmao not here to offend anyone!) and having the upbringing Noah does it only makes sense. He’s not afraid to speak his mind which is both beneficial (he helped our eggman the greg man when he stood up to his father) and negative (I wouldn’t say he probably hasn’t offended a ton of people in his time). A positive though is he’s clearly “creative” much like the Leo sign with his making movies and stuff.

Paulina: We really know nothing about Paulina yet, all we know is she is absolutely stunning and has the purest smile. I really just want her to be a sensitive Pisces because they can be the most caring and endearing sign of all and if I get to see that smile forever because she is constantly being a sweetheart than I will die accepting her as a Pisces taking it to the grave.

Charlie: We also don’t know a lot about Charlie, but since she is the team manager I put her as a Sagittarius under the assumption that she can at least be somewhat disciplined and is really good at organizing and being productive. I assume she is ambitious and maybe in my minds eye I like to imagine her as a sweet ol’ grouchy pants so pessimism is her Thing™

Sara: I’m all for loud and proud shameless lesbians so I was reading up on Virgo’s and the word comes from the word Virgin which by original definition meant ‘beholden to no man’ so my gay ass starts kicking and I am like, yes yes Sara is a Virgo die hard lesbian who will never bow down to the cis white man! But aside from that nonsense, Virgo’s tend to be independent creatures and this is a vibe I get from my girl Sara, she probably keeps lots of things unsaid about herself whether from shyness or past drama or both. However, she’s not so independent that she is uncaring or unloving and she likely tends to fret over the others wellbeing when they act foolish or put themselves at risk (i.e. my girl Sara will take a baseball to the face for Poppy 2k17 its time to ride or die bitch theres no going back)

Ari: Maybe I’m just biased towards Capricorns but I just see them as the grouchy “i love you now shut the fuck up” types and this is what I get from Ari. Much like other Capricorns, it’s difficult for Ari to express their feelings ESPECIALLY ones of affection (Ari “I’m allergic to loving expression pls don’t ever smile that fondly at me again I might vomit” Florenosos). Instead, due to the hiccup in miscommunication, they tend to relay their feelings using other likely troubling means (i.e. Ari bullying Phoebus to show affection lmao same). 

Wendy: Honestly Wendy’s feminist ride or die attitude is what led me to Aquarius because this sign tends to be the humanitarian of the signs and strive for equality in all aspects of life. She freaking defaced school property to prove a point my guys she’s a freaking Aquarius like only the Aquarius sign goes that hard and to such lengths to make sure their voice is heard.

Greg: Gregman the Eggman is a Virgo because he’s hella shy and independent. Boy can’t speak for himself for shit but often makes sure to look out for others (i.e. making sure Noah doesn’t do dumb shit and protecting the five foot weasel even though he can’t communicate the problematic things said weasel does). He’s practical and analytical and this often is what leads others to dismiss him as boring because he’s too shy to show any other side of himself or his interests. All in all, the eggman needs better friends and to erupt from his yolk filled shell.

Welp that’s pretty much all I got. I could literally be on the ball or so far from the truth that Bell is literally laughing their ass off at my poor attempt at analyzing these characters. NEVERTHELESS, I tried and here you go. Go read eerie crests here and thank/support the precious author and artist @littlestpersimmon for the content we get