#he said he died of loneliness etc etc. establishing that he was gone

[scribbling-dragon]

im gonna be thinking about the implications of joel’s video for a long time now. why did he have to do this to me ;-;

[twdmusicboxmystery]

AK’s Script Notes and Why I Love Them!

Okay, I’ve gotten some questions about this the past week and people asking me to post about it. This actually came out before last Sunday’s episode, so I’m sorry it’s taken me so long to address it. (Life is crazy and all that jive.)

So some of Angela Kang’s notes came out from episode 1. Unfortunately, they’ve lit a fire under a certain dark ship who are now on a mission, and I know people are a little disturbed by it.

So, for anyone who hasn’t seen it, what surfaced were AK’s notes on the scene they released as a sneak peek for episode 1. The one where Daryl and Carol are talking and he says Ezekiel is corny, but he’s happy for her, etc.

I want to start by saying that my FB group actually talked about this scene and reached several conclusions long before AK’s notes came out. Because it was a sneak peek for the premiere, we had this scene broken down, analyzed to death and had practically written dissertations on it before it even aired. (Hehe.)

And I remember us specifically talking about whether there was a jealous factor involved. We decided that there was, but not in the way most people would think. We thought Daryl WAS jealous of Carol and Ezekiel, but not because he’s in love with Carol and wants her to be with him. Obviously. It’s because he’s jealous of what they have. He’s lonely and has never found happiness with a romantic partner.

I think some of his bitterness about Ezekiel’s “corniness” comes from the fact that Daryl never got to have this with Beth. I can see his thought process being a little bit spiteful like, “How come THIS guy who’s so corny gets this happiness and I don’t?”

So again, my group figured all this out before episode 1 aired. In it’s purest form, his jealousy is really more about Beth than Carol. And, perhaps even more to the point, about himself and his own loneliness. At this point, he’s seen SO many couples around him in the people he cares about: Glaggie, Richonne, Rosita/Abraham, Sashraham, Tara/Denise, Aaron/Eric, and now Carzekiel. I’m sure it’s on his mind a lot.

So these notes of AK’s surfaced and one word that people are zeroing in on is “Jealousy.” Naturally, it has a certain shipping fandom screaming from the rooftops that “C@ryl is endgame.” You just have to understand that they’re misinterpreting her notes

While it doesn’t define what she means by jealousy, that didn’t bother any of us because we already knew that and what it meant. If you break down the scene in conjunction with both Daryl’s and Carol’s long-term arcs, its very apparent what the jealousy refers to.

But if you want more proof, check out the word next to jealous that those shippers are completely ignoring and just pretending isn’t there:

Saudade. 

Saudade is a word that exists in Portuguese and Galicican, but doesn’t have a direct translation into English. As you can see from Angela’s notes, it means “a feeling of nostalgia or melancholy; longing for someone or something you love that’s gone.

THIS is what Daryl is feeling in this scene. And he’s never lost Carol. She’s never been gone (although she has tried to abandon him a few times). I know the shippers are trying to say it means he’s lost his chance to be with her or some such nonsense, but think about what’s been said in the show.

Then @bluesandbeth sent me THIS LINK, which describes what saudade means. Look at what is written here, guys. Everything about it screams Beth and nothing in here sounds remotely like Carol’s arc or character:

“…a deep emotional state of nostalgic or profound melancholic longing for an absent something or someone that one loves…the object of longing might never return…”

“Stronger forms of saudade might be felt toward people and things whose whereabouts are unknown, such as a lost lover, or a family member who has gone missing, moved away, separated, or died.”

Beth anyone? Missing girl theme, anyone? Carol has never fit ANY of these descriptions. But it goes on:

“Saudade was once described as ‘the love that remains’ after someone is gone.” 

“…the recollection of feelings, experiences, places or events that once brought excitement, pleasure, well-being, which now triggers the senses and makes one live again. (emphasis mine). It can be described as emptiness, like someone…that should be there in a particular moment is missing, and the individual feels this absence.”

See what I mean? For me, this is absolute confirmation from AK that Daryl is still thinking about Beth and it’s her loss still making him sad. (Thank you, Angela!)

Furthermore, in terms of basic logic, they would not send something like this out to fans (apparently it was part of the TWD drop box) that would have spoilers in it. So that ship saying this came out to hint that Caryl is about to go canon is kinda ridiculous. They wouldn’t be that obvious or put spoilers in the drop box.

I believe they included this to give us insight into Daryl’s loneliness. They wanted us to understand how Daryl is feeling during this scene. (Naturally some people are twisting it around to fit their own theories.) With that in mind, let’s look at some of these other notes because they really are fascinating.

Starting at the top, Angela’s notes say, (next to the line where Carol puts out his cigarette and says, “These things’ll kill you.”

“Want the sense of shared history between them, honest in a way they can’t be with anyone else; it’s 2 a.m. after the bar closed down, sitting on the hood of a car.”

So establishing their history and the fact that they’re BFFs. We already know all that, but AK was noting that she really wanted it to come through in the scene, which I think it did.

Below that from “snore fancy” through “corny” it says:

“Daryl – buried jealousy of Zeke but knows he’s not a bad guy. – King persona so counter to Daryl’s personality.”

It’s that last part that’s super-interesting to me. I already addressed the jealousy, but it specifically says that Daryl has the opposite of a king’s persona. Yeah, I could go off on volumes of tangents about this. I won’t, but here’s a few things to consider:

1. Daryl doesn’t consider himself a king. He considers himself something between humble subject and not-deserving-of-anything.

2. Maybe some of his jealousy/bitterness stems from the fact that he IS so opposite of Zeke. Like he thinks he’s undeserving BECAUSE he’s not at all like that.

3. It also goes to show that he and Carol both need someone as a romantic partner that is utterly unlike them. We’ve said it a million times: these two are ridiculously similar. That’s why they’r besties. But also why they wouldn’t make good romantic partners. They both have way too much of a predilection toward falling into darkness. Beth may not have a “king persona” (though we all know she’s the Queen of Diamonds) but her personality is VERY similar to Zeke’s, which is why she’s good for Daryl and Ezekiel is good for Carol.

Okay, you get the idea. Let’s move on.

Next, Carol’s line about how after what she went through with Ed, corny is really nice, is circled. Angela’s note says, “the heart of the deal for Carol – she’s probably never said this to anyone else.”

So once again, she can talk to Daryl about things she doesn’t talk to anyone else about. But I like that AK calls this the “heart” of the scene for Carol. This tells us a lot about the relationship from Carol’s side. She’s telling us why she’s with Zeke, why she wants to be with him, why she values his love so much. And Daryl understands not only because he knows her first husband abused her, but because he’s been the object of abuse himself. So he gets it. (Which is what it says one line down in the script: Daryl nods. He gets it.)

Finally, the part where Daryl says he’s glad and happy for her and she deserves it, AK’s note says:

“Vulnerable; heart of Daryl’s problem…wants things to be…they were but they’re not and he’s struggling with that.”

This is something Daryl’s says later to Rick in episode 1: he wants things to go back to how they were in the beginning with just their small group. He’s nostalgic for the prison and the fulfillment he felt there, but obviously, “you can’t go back.”

So yeah. That’s about all I have to say about this. Don’t let other shippers freak you out. They’re gonna say what they’re gonna say, and believe what they’re gonna believe and that’s their right. Keep in mind, they said the same thing about 5x06, because it was about Daryl and Carol running around Atlanta together. Nothing. They said it about their cabin scenes in 7x10. Nope. It won’t be any more true now than at any other time they’ve said it. The show, the show runners, and the actors have told us again and again that Carol and Daryl’s relationship is platonic.

In fact…okay this is a different ship and I’m sorry to mix them, but I was glancing back through Asks that I answered prior to 9x01 airing, and I received and answered a LOT of worried Anons about the Darsita ship. The Darsita shippers were really laying it on thick at that time about how that ship would go canon this season. 

Again, I’m a ship and let ship sort of person, but all their theories have already been pretty much disproved. We don’t know what will happen the rest of the season, of course, but we already know Rosita is with FG and spoilers tell us she’ll cheat on him…but not with Daryl. So please don’t let the shippers freak you out.

Yes, we’re shippers too and I’m sure they say similar things to this about us, but we’re also the only ones I know of that pay attention to actual symbolism in the show and listen closely to what tptb and others involved in the production actually tell us.

And then there’s that shot of Beth lying beside Daryl in Rick’s hallucination in 9x05. Just saying. ;D

[prixmiumarchive]

The Parabatai Oath

This may not be news to some of you, but my friend who brought me into the Shadowhunters fandom was unaware and thought it was really cool, so I wanted to write a brief meta post about it. (Thanks, @thethirteenthhouse!)

I should note that I am pretty much a show-only fan (full disclosure view expressed here) so I am only going by that portrayal. One can infer from the Shadowhunters television series that it is going with a worldview that posits that multiple mythologies are real, including one of a Judeo-Christian flavor. The notion of Nephilim is something that is borrowed and extrapolated from the Bible/Torah, etc. Given that, I think it’s fair to assert that Biblical mythology has a place in this world that is pretty solid.

Which brings me to the Parabatai Oath. I was watching 02x03 with thethirteenthhouse and when Jace began to recite the Parabatai Oath, I started to think... this is really... really familiar. And then it hit me.

Cut for length.

The Parabatai Oath is lifted straight out of the Book of Ruth, which is to my knowledge from both Jewish and Christian scripture. My perspective is a Christian one, so if anyone with a more Jewish background wants to jump in and counter my understanding of this passage from my religious background with the way it is viewed from another background, feel free, but I wanted to give a background ans summary for any who might be interested.

A summary of the Book of Ruth (colored by my own perspective) is that it is the story of one of Jesus’s ancestors who was a foreigner to Israel. It tells us that there was a woman named Naomi (later Mara) who had gone to a country called Moab with her husband and two sons. They established a life there and settled down to form permanent roots. Eventually, Naomi’s husband died and left her two sons. The two sons married women of Moab and they continued to live there about ten years. Eventually, both sons die as well while Naomi is yet living, leaving her two daughters-in-law widowed. 

While in grief, Naomi decides that she will return to the land of Israel because she has heard that the Lord has blessed Israel with a good growing season and an abundance of food. One of the ways Israel’s social system at the time was set up to care for the poor was a rule that employed grain harvesters were not allowed to pick up any grain they mistakenly dropped or which fell from whatever vessel they were putting the grain in. Any grain which fell to the ground was free for the impoverished. I assume, then, that even though Naomi was an older woman (or at least middle-aged) her plan was that at least there she would not starve. And yeah, it sucks, but basically the expectation was that most women did not have jobs or professions sufficient to fully support themselves, even if they were capable of some trade. 

Anyway, Naomi’s daughters-in-law pack up to go with her, widowed as they are. And she tells them to go back home even though she loves them because she cannot provide a good life for them. Presumably, they had effectively become her daughters through marriage to her sons, but she had no more male relatives. In this largely patriarchal society, male relatives were not only empowered to but were (at least ideally) obligated to care for their female relatives. This might include sisters, nieces, widowed mothers, and so on. It was heavily reliant on the practice of levirate marriage, however. This is a practice where if a woman’s  husband dies without leaving her a male heir, she is obliged to marry her brother-in-law of nearest suitable station and age (even in cases where it may cause polygamy to my understanding) basically forming a social contract, if not a conventional marriage, where he is supposed to take care of her and attempt to give her a male heir. Then, presumably help care for that male heir, his son, until he is old enough to take on the male responsibility for taking care of hims mom or something like that. And I know, I know, this is gross to any modern feminist sensibilities we have, but bear with me.

The above circumstances explain why socially and economically it was pretty impractical and a mutual burden to take on for Naomi and her daughters-in-law to stay together, even though they were very much family-by-marriage in some sense. Naomi tells her daughters-in-law that whatever their sense of obligation to and love for her, they should return to their home and their families and gods because she cannot hope to provide them with future husbands, or a surrogate father, or anything like that. Orpah (not Oprah) agrees and lovingly tells her mother-in-law farewell.

Ruth, however, cannot stand it. She clearly has a deep bond with Naomi that she refuses to break, whatever the consequences. She loves her absolutely and would forfeit and forsake anything for her. I’ve seen a handful of arguments that this is an example of wlw or sapphic love, and while I’m not here with an axe to grind, I would argue instead that we see a bond that is every bit as strong and deep as a romantic one but which is different in quality. (On the other hand, I would 100% argue that it’s really, really hard to read David and Jonathan as bros, but I recorded their narrative here a long time ago.)

In Shadowhunters, it is said that parabatai being in love with each other is not a good thing. It is my understanding that it is because it would place an undue strain on the bond that is already so powerful and produce dark magic or something, but ask thethirteenthhouse to explain that to me again. So, I would argue that Ruth and Naomi’s bond is the Type for this kind of bond, drawn from the mythology from which the Angel and other things are drawn. Basically, it is a love that supersedes practical reason or practical intent -- it has nothing to do with practical companionship, with romantic love and a cessation of loneliness, with procreation (in the case of people who can procreate together). Instead, I would posit, the parabatai bond is the equally beautiful, altogether more rare bond that forgoes practicality. It promises nothing in return for itself except the fierceness of its own commitment. It is a commitment and love that, while it may strengthen the bearers at times, seems more liability than benefit in a lot of other ways. I would just point to Alec’s straining and suffering when he has been at odds with or looking for Alec as an example. Mutual,committed romantic love is a series of implied promises made to another person that, hopefully, hold that person up, in exchange for those same or similar promises and support and a gratification of longing for that person. It would seem that being a parabatai comes with none of those stipulations or fringe benefits (though I am certainly not belittling them). Being a parabtai is a promise of oneself and oneself alone. Being a parabatai has need of a person as a consequence as much as a prerequisite for the commitment and continuation of that relationship. Being a parabatai would seem, to me, to be a kind of commitment and connection that calls for and promises nothing except you and me against whatever should oppose us and that alone and that is enough.

And so, I leave you with the Parabatai Oath (also known as Ruth 1:16-17):

16 And Ruth said: “Entreat me not to leave thee, or to return from following after thee; for whither thou goest, I will go, and where thou lodgest, I will lodge. Thy people shall be my people, and thy God my God.

17 Where thou diest will I die, and there will I be buried; the Lord do so to me, and more also, if aught but death part thee and me.”

And the Parabatai Oath adds: “The Angel do so to me, and more also, if aught but death part thee and me.”