#he probably hates me for “nagging” but shit this is not okay son !!

[simpotat]

Me: I am not a mother

Also me: *currently scolding the same thirteen year old in two different chats*

[reidsqlick]

You’ll be back, right? || (S.R)

pairing(s): Spencer Reid x Fem!Reader

summary: Spencer and you had been close friends, but due to an unexpected, sudden reason that friendship had fallen through, and led to what seems to be a rivalry.. what happens when you confront him of this?

warning(s): (MDNI 18+), softdom!spencer, unprotected sex, p in v, swearing, I don’t believe there’s any more but if there is please enlighten me 💔💔.

word count: 3,7k

Working for the FBI was a challenge, everyone who looked into the FBI, or had been an agent would tell you the same. As an agent, you’ve definitely come close to death many times throughout your career, you had known that’s what came with the job, and you more than ready for that. You were quite honestly ready for whatever this job could bring your way. Ready to tackle each obstacle with such ease, so much to the point you didn’t even care what could be thrown your way.

That’s what you thought until you had met Dr. Spencer Reid. Being transferred to this unit of yours was something you had no issue doing. Ready for whatever it brought you, whatever new challenges this career brought you. Nothing, and I mean nothing was going to get in the way of that mindset of yours you were so, ultimately set on.

Unfortunately, that mindset hadn’t met Spencer Walter Reid. The genius of the BAU. Mr. “187 IQ”. Once a twenty-four year old kid prodigy who knew more than most at that age. Now, obviously not twenty-four, and not quite a ‘kid prodigy’ anymore.

The man had gotten on your nerves since the day he chose his ego over you. Not cause he was necessarily a bad guy, he was actually friends with you. However, the shit that got on your nerves was the fact he was open about disliking you, his ego slowly becoming more important than your friendship sometime during your duration of working there.

Forever you thought about what you had done. At first, you two were oh so close, as close as one can get with Reid, at the time he at least could have tolerate saying more than at minimum, five word sentences to you in passing, or because Hotch had asked you two to pair up to go check things out.

He always teased you at work. Either making some snide comment about your intelligence, or critiquing the way you had gotten your part of the job done. God, it was aggravating to say the least. With each snide comment that was said in passing, the more he pissed you off.

You really hadn’t hated him. You had hated the way he was so rude towards you. You truly never got it, never understood how he could be so nice to you when you had joined, talking to you more than a friend should, but, hey.. he probably talked to everyone like that, right?

One day it snapped. He just… started being an absolute piss poor son of a bitch who couldn’t get enough of himself. Wafting in every comment of some girl on a case in passing, it stroking his ego. God, the man was so aggravating in every way possible. You just couldn’t understand what changed with him.

Yeah, okay. If we’re being honest with one another, I liked him, okay? I more than liked him. I kind of slightly loved him. When I first joined the unit, I had clicked with him the most. It was almost instant. Your shared love for ‘Doctor who’, and books. Most of all, you listened to him ramble. Not many do that, and when they do they always tease him for it.

Now he’s teasing you? Jesus, you couldn’t get over it. The man you once let into your heart, expressed your interests to him, let you be yourself around him, becoming such an asshat. That was beyond what you could’ve expected. Especially since it was so out of the blue.

Life is very against you as of late. You and the team are out on a case in Boston, where you’ll have to be staying in one of the “lovely” hotels there. The issue is that the team actually had gotten done with the case early. The hotel had been booked for a whole extra day.

So, due to Penelope Nagging Hotch so much to the point he actually gave in, you’re all going drinking. The hotel bar, obviously. Can’t stray too far from one another, yes we’re all FBI agents, but… safety first, always.

You weren’t one for drinking if you were honest, but it was a team thing, so you’d go. This case had ended up being much more stressful than it let off, and you kind of needed to cool off, and with the people you considered family.

You hadn’t dressed up, Jesus, no. Never. You aren’t one for dressing up. Yeah, you’re feminine.. just, sometimes dresses aren’t the comfiest, that’s one. Two, for fucks sake.. this is a hotel bar. It’s truly not serious enough to dress up for.

Just your leisure wear you brought, jeans, and a t-shirt. Don’t even get me started on the “Pick me” or “You’re so basic” shit, it’s just leisure wear, at a hotel bar. Fuck if I care, I’ll dress how I please.

Leaving your hotel room, you walk up to the elevator, pressing the ‘down’ arrow. Awaiting the elevator, to your surprise the one and only Spencer Walter Reid decided to waltz to catch it as well. Jesus Christ. He’s really not one for drinking. I know I’m not one for drinking, but he isn’t last time I checked.

The elevator dung open, and you stepped in, Spencer walking in behind you. You click the ‘one’, and wait for this ride to be over. You look around, trying to ignore the fact he was here. You look over at him for, what? A split second, and he catches your eyes.

Fuck. That was accidental… oh, what? He’s still wearing his suit. Jesus, you’d think the man would get into something more comfortable, yet… he’s Spencer Reid. He’s not getting more comfy than this.

Shit, this elevator ride is longer than you remembered it being. Yeah, you were on the twelveth floor, but why is it taking so long. You speak up, hating the silence. Might as well embarrass yourself more than you already had, mhm. Great fucking idea!

“Didn’t take you as much of a drinker, Boygenius.” You said, loud enough for him to hear you, but not quite loud at all. “You don’t know me, (Y/LN). You can’t ‘take’ me as much of anything.” He said, obviously annoyed. Shit.. why’d he have to be such an asswipe about everything he did. Jesus Christ you can’t say anything anymore, can you?

“Actually I do-“ he cut you off, “You do not know me. You think you know me, and I hate to break it to you, but you don’t know me. Don’t know why you somehow think cause we were close years ago when you first started working here, that you know anything. You don’t know me enough to classify me as a drinker, that’s one. Even if I wasn’t before, people change (Y/LN).”

Before you could even add, you were disrupted by the ding of the elevator. Thank god. But, seriously? Where does he think he gets off? You both leave the elevator, him in-front of you now. Walking to the bar, you were greeted by the rest of your team. Penelope enveloping you in one of her hugs.

Chatter between the team had went on for an hour or two, you hadn’t gotten drunk, but you were… tipsy to say the least. You really, seriously weren’t one for drinking, but Spencer being there, and his snarky ass comments from earlier truly set you off. You decide it’s better to go to your room before you get shit-faced drunk, so you say your ‘goodbyes’ to the rest of the team.

Pen pulled you aside, “Hun.. what’s up? You’ve barely spoken a word tonight. You’re just away from us, the group. Did we.. do something on the case that we missed? I can make someone apologize, cause (Y/LN)… I’m not gonna let stuff like that slide-“ you just sit silent. Giving her that look.

She looked confused. “(Y/N).. who,” you cut her off “Spencer. It’s nothing. Just.. we got on the elevator together and it got awkward again. Pen, you’re so lucky I love the rest of you cause I’d have already left cause of Spencer ‘I’ve got a stick in my ass’ Reid.” She and I chuckled.

She nodded, waving you goodbye. Telling the rest of the team about your departure for the night. You left the bar, walking towards the elevator, and clicking the ‘up’ arrow. It dinged not too long after, you entered, and clicked number twelve. As the doors were close to shutting, a hand came between them, forcing them to open back up.

Cause life hates me, who else could it possibly be except Spencer goddamn Reid? Jesus. Why’d we have to leave at the same time, why’d we have to get stuck in the same elevator again!? The ride was silent, well… for a while it was, until he decided it was just lovely to open his mouth, yeah this is just what you needed right now after your previous six drinks.

“Didn’t take you for much of a drinker, either (Y/L/N).” He chuckled, opening up the topic of conversation started just hours ago. “Hah, very funny Reid, I’m really not one.” He shrugged. “No? You didn’t sit at the bar and consume six too many drinks? That wasn’t you? Guess I’m imagining someone else as you.”

You sighed, staying silent. Not wanting to speak to him anymore than you already have tonight. You’re intoxicated, scratch that, you were more than intoxicated, and this really is NOT the proper setting for this. “Don’t wanna talk? Oh, wait.. you don’t want to speak to my face? That’s right. Okay, (Y/LN). I see, you can easily just tell people I have a “stick in my ass” and yet, won’t respond to me? That’s fine with me..”

Those words lingered.. oh they’re pissing you off. You looked at him, he was already looking down at you with the most aggravating smirk on his face. “You do have a stick up your ass. There? What do you want me to tell you!? What can I tell you? Last I remember I ‘don’t know you’ so how will I speak to you if I don’t even know you. Oh, and what can I say? Hmmm? Enlighten me, Spencer. Every time I do something you don’t like, you start running your mouth. Last time I checked, that’s the only time I’ve spoken about you behind your back, so you obviously need to get a grip, Reid.”

“You need me to enlighten you, do you?” He began, “Let me enlighten you, (Y/LN). You can say whatever you want, that’s fine with me, you simply just don’t bring me into it. We got that clear? I don’t need my coworkers thinking im some sort of dick cause you’re butthurt,” he looked at your eyes carefully “and intoxicated.”

“Why don’t you like me anymore,” I let out quietly. “Hm?” He said, clearing his throat. “Why. Don’t. You. Like. Me. Anymore!?” I said, louder. Tears violently threatening to spill. “What’re you talking about?” A tear rolled down your face “What am I talking about!? Jesus, how many times do I have to say it. We were friends, Reid. I liked you,” he was taken aback “I loved you. Jesus, did you forget about our friendship? I know it’s been a while.. but how many girls have to flirt with you to forget your friend? God, Spencer.”

He didn’t even say anything. You stood there, unaware of what was happening, obviously intoxicated. Tears spilling out of your eyes slowly. He looked over at you, looking at you, reading your expressions. He took two steps, making you two mere inches apart. He then leaned down, putting his forehead on yours.

You sniffled, “Reid, what’re you doing-“ “Can I kiss you, (Y/N)? Please say yes..” you nodded. “I need you to tell me I can kiss you, need you to tell me you want me to kiss you.” “Yes, Reid,” before you could even finish he grabbed the sides of your face, pushing his lips onto yours.

You kissed him back, with just as much eagerness as confusion. Don’t you hate him? What’s happening? Before you could even think properly the elevator dinged, you’ve made it to your floor.

He then moved his hands to your waist, leading you out of the elevator, lips still on yours, you pulled away. “Reid. What’re you doing?” Then, it came out. The years you wanted to know what happened, and he’s about to tell you. “I love you, too.” Your response? You pulled his lips back onto yours, walking backwards, finding your room.

You broke the kiss for a second, turning around to unlock the door, reaching for the keycard in your pocket, as Spencer wrapped his hands around your waist. When the door unlocked you basically ran into the room, closing the door behind you two. Once you turned around, your lips were already back on his.

You might be asking, why aren’t you talking this out? Why aren’t you asking what this is? His lips are telling you all you need to know, and you weren’t mad at all. Stumbling around the room, you made it to the bedroom and closed that door, as well. His hands still firm on your waist, he then pushed you against the bedroom door.

His mouth moved from your lips to peppering kisses on your jaw, to then sucking down onto your neck. You were letting out small whimpers, nothing too loud, but it was making him absolutely crazy. As he was marking your neck with visible bruises that weren’t going to be gone anytime soon, he moved his knee between your legs.

You began to grind down on this knee to create some form of friction. Fuck, you were getting louder. Seriously, (Y/N). I mean… seriously? You hate him. You hate how snarky he gets, hate how he makes snide comments, hate how good his lips feel traveling down your neck, hate how good his knee feels against your already aching cunt.

He then started to move his leg with the movements of your hips against him. Jesus. You’re putty in his hands, aren’t you? You’re done for. He then moved his hands under your shirt, starting to ride it up, asking you a question “Can I take it off,” he asked, all you could do was let out sorry whimpers as you were essentially getting yourself off on him, he stopped the movements of his leg, his grip on your hips tightening again “Hm?” All you did was nod, giving him your approval.

Once that was gone, he went back to working on your neck, sucking small bruises, moving down to your collarbone, receiving whimpers and low moans from you. He then moved his hands to the buttons of your jeans. “Can I?” He asked, you nodded again. “Can I?” He repeated. You speak up, “Mhm-“ he nodded, beginning to unbutton your jeans, and then unzipping the zip on them, causing them to fall to the floor.

There wasn’t much light in the room, only a lamp in the corner illuminating the dark room. Enough light for him to be able to see the wet spot in your underwear. He smiled, “You’re already so wet.” He said, circling small circles on your clothed clit, making whimpers fall from your mouth so desperately.

“You know,” he said, pushing your panties to the side, gathering up your arousal on two of his fingers “I love you. It’s why I ignored you so much,” he said, bringing his fingers up and down your slit, “too distracted to do my job sometimes, you know.” He said, inserting one finger into you, causing a breathily gasp leaving your mouth with such ease.

“Just thought if I ignored you, it’d help me from getting distracted with my job.” He said, moving his finger at a slower pace, curling it so every so often to get a reaction out of you. “It didn’t help much, though-“ he said, “I was still getting distracted, all the time. Couldn’t even focus on work, princess.” He added another finger, stretching you out even more. “You know what happens when I can’t focus on work? I get upset, love. Wasn’t even you I was mad at, I was mad at myself, for getting so fucking pent up over you.” He said as he continued his pace, curling his fingers every so often.

He then pulled them out, a soft, disappointing whimper leaving your lips. “Shh, I know. Let’s get you comfy, yeah?” He said, moving you onto the bed, beginning to fully undress you, leaving you exposed. “What about you…” you chimed in nervously. He chuckled. “Oh, right. Sorry, princess. Let me just,” he said as he begun to rid himself of his own garments.

When he rid himself of his prior clothing, all but his boxers, he then hovered over top of you, beginning to gather up more of your slick, rubbing your clit in small, tight circles leaving you an absolute mess. You then began to grip the hand he was using to prop himself up with, needy with greed, your eyes practically begging.

“You close already, princess?” He asked in that cocky tone of his, smirking. If he hadn’t been making you feel this good, bringing you this close to release, making you feel better than you could ever do yourself, you would’ve already hit him upside the head. You then nodded, moans leaving your mouth the easiest they ever had. He had then removed himself of his boxers, his cock springing up and hitting his chest, glistening with all his pre-cum.

Your mouth all but fell to the ground in shock, it was so pretty, he was so pretty. Looking down at you, he had begun alligning himself with your glistening cunt, gathering your slick, finally positioning himself at your entrance, “You ready for me, princess?” You bucked your hips, nodding quickly, “Are you ready?” He asked again, the need to be in you was strong, but the need for your consent was stronger. “Yes, please Spencer—“ He smiled, “Good,” he said, slowly sinking into you, disappearing into you inch, by inch.

He fully sunk into you with a low groan, and slowly begun thrusting into you, warming you up for him, he had then moved his hand between your bodies, and began rubbing your clit in painfully slow circles, watching your face contort with a dumbfound smile on his face. He had then began to move faster, causing you to get even louder than before, and then he finally found his pace, the perfect pace, the pace that hit that spot of yours so well, the spot you were sure never existed, as the men before him were never able to find it, let alone you.

But, fuck. You had to admit, it felt so good. “Spencer— fuck… keep, keep going,” you were putty in his hands, you were his to mold, “yes— like that! Fuck…” he couldn’t help but let out small grunts, and groans. He never knew he could have such an effect on you, he had played this moment so many times in his head, but he’s so, so thankful for his eidetic memory so he can actually remember this moment exactly.

“Feel good doesn’t it, Angel?” He groaned, “Hits where it’s supposed to,” your whimpers got needier, his thrusts got sloppier, “ts’ like this cock was made just for you.” that was it, that was truly it, drunk off his words, his every moment, “Spencer, I’m—“ he got even sloppier, faster, rubbing your clit with such speed you could explode right then and there, your legs began to shake around him.

“Let go, princess. I know you can, ‘know you want to, let it all out for me,” he said, groans getting louder, getting close to his own release himself, two more strokes and you were a dead woman, your orgasm hitting you like a tidal wave, head thrown back, moans louder than ever.

“Fuck, Angel..” he said, pulling out, stroking himself fast, needing his own release, and seeing you like this, cum dripping out of you, it’s just what he needed, it’s the prettiest thing he had ever seen, and now it was ingrained in his mind forever. “Where do you want me, I—“ you whimpered, he was so pretty like this, fucking his hand, head cocked back, groans leaving him.. “T-tummy’s fine—“ and there it was, leaving his cock just seconds later.

His body plopped next to you, hand finding your cheek, caressing it softly. “You did so good for me, Angel..” he smiled softly, you giggled at his compliment, words more innocent than the action you had shared just moments earlier. “Hey, hey let’s get you cleaned up, don’t need you a mess, now do we?” He chucked, leaving the room to grab a washcloth, and coming back with it, wiping his cum off your stomach.

Once you were cleaned up, he had grabbed clothes from your go bag, dressing you slowly, not wanting to overworked your already tired self, “Thank you, Spencer—“ you said softly, almost a whisper, he smiled with pride, “No need to thank me, princess. It wasn’t a favor.” You couldn’t help but giggle, “Mhm, I know— just thought I should thank you, mm never felt that good before, thought that was worth a thanks.”

Once you were in comfy clothes, he had lied next to you, caressing your face, “Angel..” he started, “I’ve gotta go back to my room..” he trailed off, not wanting to leave you like this, sleepy, and alone..

Before he could even finish what he wanted to say, you interrupted him “Don’t—!” He chuckled softly, “I don’t want to, I promise you.. I just need to grab something, okay?” You nodded, but a low groan left your tired lips.

He had gotten up from the mattress, it springing up due to the loss of his weight. Once he reached the handle of the door you yelled out to him, “You’ll be back, right?” your voice drowsy, dripping with tiredness.

He looked back for a moment, smiling softly, “Right.”

A/N: oh my god this is my first published smut my teeth are jittering, hands shaking… please please PLEASE tell me how I did if you could cause I actually can’t tell how bad or good this is. but yeah, I tried. P.S: this smut has been sitting in my drafts for over a MONTH.

[xysidhequeen]

Anon Positivity! Get well soon <3!

I will probably not get well anytime soon, sadly. I don't exactly have anything curable. But! What I do have is a reluctance to edit because I hate editing with a passion, and I do not have a beta. Which I should probably get. Actually that's a good idea, they could nag me to write more. I need to be nagged.

Anyways, what I have right now is another snippet. Enjoy.

~~~~~~☆☆☆☆~~~~~~

"Why don't you stop by the Mausoleum? I'm sure Jason would love to meet you," Danny offered, knowing full well that an invitation like that to a ghost or spirit was as good as telling them they could move in.

Ghosts and spirits were a bit like vampires. If you squinted. When you invited them in they kinda sorta just stayed.

It really was a good thing they had so many rooms. Mostly in preparation for the ghosts they expected to more or less move in as soon as the portal was functional.

Gotham beamed at the invitation, her lips, and her veil actually, split to reveal a smile full of needle-like teeth. It wasn't a nice smile, it was objectively horrifying. But Danny's 'fear' meter had been broken for ages. Horror movies didn't even phase him anymore, he'd seen so many eldritch beings they were as good as bedtime stories. So when he saw a smile that stretched too far, splitting paper thin skin and dripping with red, red blood he simply smiled back.

How could he not when he was being drowned under wave after wave of Happy/Home?/Home/Welcome/Gratitude/Love/Son!/Son/Care/Affection/Joy/Joy

~~~~~☆☆☆☆~~~~~

I love Gotham, okay? I'm trying not to fully spoil what she exactly looks like. She's creepy af though. Like. Really. Fucking. Creepy. Danny's just an unreliable narrator when it comes to creepy and gruesome. He's seen too much shit.

[maria-ruta]

How would a reunion between Blueberry and his parents look like?

previous post about Berry's parents

so Berry and his crew are bounty hunters

Maybe he go some mission that got his parents involved, nothing murder related though, he doesn't take missions like that. Maybe steal something from them or the other way around - do something for them (like deliver the package or save them from something)

But at the same time I think if he KNOWS its them - he would be tearing apart not knowing if he actually wants to meet them or not...

But also during the missions Berry hides his face behind the helmet like

SO... even if they meet in person, Berry would be hiding behind his disguise and prettending he never knew them (which would be super stressful for him, bc he didn't see him in ages and wants to know how are they doing, and part of him wants them to acknowledge him and part wishes they don't know it is him. Keeping it together would take a lot of composture)

overall he will try his best to keep his real identity hidden till the end of the mission and beyond

but if it happens so that his disguise fumbles then it probably would be very chaotic and nerve wrecking

but hopefully would resolve into something like

bonus: my thoughts about theoretical Berry's parent's acceptance of his transition (put under cut for people who dont want to stress themselves with it)

I think his mom would be that kind of mom that still would nag about where did her daughter go and why did Berry not want to be such wonderful and beautiful girl, as well as guiltrip for various other reasons as well (like loosing of political positions/social aproval/family heritage/bloodline/etc etc the list goes on, all the things Berry ran away from, all he hates so)

while dad would be more accepting, just happy to know his kid is okay and glad to have son now. I don't think he is very progressive, just overall more chill and not giving shit about such stuff, like "hey kid tell me about your ship now". The fact that his kid is bounty hunter now is way more concerning for him

[cogbreath]

i waint to hea r your bbt things

sheldon is also not the only one whos autistic imo. im not certain of who i all headcanon as such, but i feel its a fitting one for amy and bernadette actually. i think a lot of the problems with the way sheldon's autism is written is the fact that other characters don't *respect* him about it. like his needs and behaviors are often belittled or treated as nonsensical. overall i think everyone should be much kinder and understanding about it towards him seeing as they are literally his friends and all.

also probably a nitpicky thing and a matter of my own autistic sensory preferences but i feel it makes more sense for sheldon to NOT wear his sleeves rolled up for sensory reasons. whatever though im allowed to project. also i think they missed an opportunity to explore his interest in vexillology more? like there was maybe 1 or 2 episodes i remember about it but if youve ever met a vexillology enjoyer you know its a common topic they gush about.

speaking of gushing i think the dynamic between sheldon and amy would be like. two autistic best friends who love to infodump at eachother and do parallel activities. at most maybe they have some sort of queerplatonic thing going on? but im not actually super versed in what that means despite being aromantic myself xP

oh anothet thing that bothers me is how the female characters are written as not getting any of the geeky stuff??? it's stupid. like, yeah penny isnt a nerd, but she's an aspiring actress i think she would know what a star trek is. -_- honestly like, all of them would understand a lot of those things and are probably into similar stuff. bbt seems to think that like, these are Guy interests that all women dont understand or get when in reality like, dc comics n shit like that, literally your average person can follow along so i hate that they make the women seem as if they don't understand star wars references.

obviously this is probably one of the most common complaints about the show but id love to have made a lot of the pop culture references controlled and niche. we dont need a reference every other 5 minutes, id like to define each character's interests in a more sensicle way outside of just "haha guys look theres nerd stuff on tv hahah did you guys get that reference"?

also another problem is the way howard behaves. like some episodes his behavior is like, sexual harassment at times, which is met with a laugh track every time. not cool, and unnecessary, should be written to be more respectful. and then of course id like to make him have a better view of his mother, the dynamic in the show is one based off of antisemitic stereotypes about jewish mothers, and thats shitty. i wont retcon it to be a perfect mother/son relationship, like they would definitely still bicker, but i want to potray his mother as more than nagging and obsessive, like perhaps she does care too much and doesn't always treat him as an adult at times, but i dont find a lot of the overall nastiness that happens in the show between them to be funny or interesting.

raj is a pretty okay character imho, but definitely needs to be written more respectfully. He is a major example of the trope of characters of colour being sidelined. like the fact he was the ONLY character to be single in the end of the series? its kinda fucked up lol. obviously as mentioned before i think raj x howard should be the canon outcome. howeber both of them are bisexual, they both are potrayed as having interest in women; but i also think their interest in eachother is serious, or at least should be written as such. its also probably likely that the way he's written in terms of his culture should be improved but i havent gotten around to that just yet. i also think his anxiety issues should have been written with more respect, like the fact he was physically unable to talk to girls i think shouldnt have been an issue he had with *just* women. it seems they were trying to potray him as having selective mutism? but obviously thats not a thing that ONLY happens when one is a around ppl they r attracted to.

bernadette im actually rlly excited to write better because she reminds me of myself at times. i will dial her mischievous nature and her interest in microbiology up to 10. i will make her infodump about prions just i do.

also imho leonard is transmasc. i dont have any like, "evidence" or theory for why i think that other than just he feels that way to me. not that we even need justifications for transgender headcanons around these parts though.

also wil wheaton will NOT be existing anymore as a character in the narrative due to the fact he blocked me on tumblr for some dumbass shit. LOL.

uh i didnt expect to actually have all that much to say about this show... LOL.. enjoy my rambling!

[kireimarkeu]

To You; l.dh

+another repost! did not make any changes to this work :) p.s this is one of my fav fics i have written :)

summary; bored in quarantine, your boyfriend decides to film himself telling you how much he loves you.

3k words

this was like… ½ edited LMFAO so there might,,, be mistakes…??? this was so tiring to make omfg, enjoy!! lol 

also i mixed the name donghyuck and haechan bc i couldn’t choose one lmfao ok!!! bye gn enjoy!! :)))))))

warnings: there’s a word f*t in it

+Day 1 3:34PM

Haechan adjusted the camera, making sure he could be seen. Once he was sure the camera was reflecting him properly, he leaned back against his gaming chair. 

“Um,” your boyfriend started, looking everywhere but the camera. “This is awkward,” he says, looking back at the camera.

“I started this, since we won’t be able to see each other for a month- because of quarantine,” he explains, “I honestly have no idea what I’m doing right now,” he laughs. 

After a few minutes of pure silence, your boyfriend opened his mouth to continue speaking, “I just feel like— I never really show much love to you?” 

There were times where your boyfriend would purposely avoid saying ‘I love you’ or avoid holding your hands whenever the both of you were outside. Honestly, you didn’t really mind, knowing Donghyuck was never the type to show affection. 

“It’s hard,” he says truthfully, “The boys knows how much I love you, and it sucks that I don’t know how to show you— or tell you, that I love you.”

Haechan bit his lips nervously, “and, I think this video is- or will prove that I love you?”

He wasn’t sure if he was even making sense at this point. 

Your boyfriend groaned, throwing his head back, covering his face with his hands. After a while, he looked back at the camera, “you know what, babe? Just watch the whole thing, okay?”

+Day 4 11:47PM

“Hi,” he smiles, letting out a huff, “this is kinda late, I spent the whole night playing games,” he says guiltily, playing with his fingers, looking away from the camera.

He knows that you didn’t like it when he would stay up until ungodly hours just to play games with his friends. You hated how he would put his health aside just to play games. 

He brings his hands up to brush his wet hair. 

“Uh,” he sighs out loud, pouting. “I feel bad for staying up late last night, so I’m going to spend the whole night with you today,” he laughs. 

Another moment of silence pass. 

“I don’t know what to say,” he whines. 

He sat there in silence, staring at the ground, figuring out on what to say. Should he tell you about his day?

“Well, I woke up at 5PM today,” he tells you, “I ate dinner with my family— mom cooked chicken today!” he says happily, “Then, I went to call you for a bit because I missed you a little too much,” he pouts. 

He scratched his head, “then I showered and now this-“ he says, pointing to the camera. 

“Um, it has been 4 days and I miss you too much,” he says truthfully, “facetiming isn’t working, I think I’m going crazy,” he laughs. 

+Day 5 7:38PM

He was talking halfway, talking about how much he admires you when his phone started ringing. 

“Oh?” he turns around to grab his phone from his bed. A smile formed on his face when he saw you facetiming him. 

He turned to the camera to show his screen, “Baby, you’re calling me,” he giggles before quickly answering to your facetime. 

“Channie~” you whine cutely when your boyfriend answered your facetime, “what are you doing, hyuckie?”

Usually, your boyfriend would complain whenever you would speak in a cute voice, but he secretly likes it. He secretly likes being babied. 

He looks at the camera that was recording the both of you. 

“Nothing,” he lies, “why did you call me, loser?”

You huff, raising your arms so he could see you laying on the bed. “I’m bored, hyuckie~ entertain me~”

He leans back on his chair, “wanna play games with me?”

Your face beam at his words, “Okay! I’ll get my X-Box ready now.”

Your boyfriend was the one who bought for you the X-Box. Well, it was an old version, but you loved it, nonetheless. It wasn’t like you played daily— you only played with boyfriend. 

“I’ll call you in 5, baby,” he tells you, already walking over to turn on the tv. 

“Kay, bye-bye, love you, Hyuckie,” you say in a baby voice, bringing your phone closer to press your lips on the camera. 

Donghyuck scrunched his nose in disgust, “yeah, yeah,” he says before ending the call. 

He quickly grab the camera that was still recording, he moved the camera closer to press a kiss, “I love you too, y/n.”

+Day 7 3:01PM

“Do you remember when you gave me the teddy bear— Oh my gosh, I feel like a youtuber,” he cackles. He shook his head, focusing back to what he was saying. 

“So, do you remember when you gave me the teddy bear?” he asks, “wait,” he says, standing up to grab the tiny teddy bear that was sitting on his bed. 

You had bought him the bear during your 200th day with him. Donghyuck didn’t really give the reaction you wanted. 

“Do you not like it?” you had asked him, disappointment laced in your voice. You didn’t dare look at him, upset with yourself that you had bought something that he didn’t like. 

“No, no!” he quickly replied, wrapping an arm around your shoulder to pull you into his chest, the other holding the tiny bear. “I love it,” he says. 

You knew it was a lie. He didn’t seem to like it. 

“I love it,” he says, “I know I didn’t show like I did at that time, but I need it with me every time I go to bed.” 

He scratches his head, regretting his actions that has had happened months ago. 

“No one has ever bought me a bear before,” he explains, “and when you bought it for me, it just felt— I felt, I felt happy? I felt fulfilled? Do you know what I mean?” 

“I really wanted to tell you that I loved your present, especially when you had bought me another present a few days later,”

‘it was to make up for the previous present’ was your reason. 

It broke his heart when you said that while handing him a couple bracelet. He wanted to tell you how much he loved your gift, but it was so hard for him. 

“I hated myself for not being able to tell you the truth, it’s hard—and it still is,” he sighs, “I hope by doing this, I can assure you that I love you..?” 

+Day 10 9:34PM

He was in the middle of filming himself when his mother comes in. 

“Donghyuck-ah, what are you doing? Do you want some fruits?” his mother asks, looking at his son, not noticing the camera perched on the dressing table. 

Instead of answering his mother’s question, he grabs the camera to film his mother. 

“Eomma, say hello to y/n,” Donghyuck says. 

His mother raised her eyebrows in surprised, “hello my dear y/n~ how are you?”

Your boyfriend giggle from behind the camera, “tell her how much you miss her,”

“I think I miss you more than Donghyuck does,” she jokes. “What is this for, Donghyuck-ah?”

Haechan placed the camera back on the dressing table, turning to look at his mum.

“I’m making a video for y/n until quarantine is over,” he explains as his mother walks in, wrapping her arm around her son’s shoulder. 

His mother’s heart warmed at his son’s words. 

“You’re growing up way too fast, our Donghyuck~” she cooed, pulling your boyfriend’s cheeks as he whined in pain. 

You would also pinch his cheeks almost every time the both of you are together. Whenever you had Donghyuck’s cheeks between your fingers, he would whine, pulling away from your grip.

“Eomma! I want strawberries!” he shouts after his mother left his room. 

He turns his attention back to the camera, “Anyways—”

+Day 17 2:35AM

“I really like your eyes,” Haechan confesses dreamily, “your eyes are the colour of shit,” he jokes, “but they’re so shiny, baby,”

The first time he realizes he’s in love with your glimmering eyes was when he brought you out on a date to star gaze. You were staring at the sky, a smile plastered on your face, amazed at how beautiful the sky was. 

When you noticed your boyfriend staring at you, you turned to face him. Your eyes captured his heart. How could someone have such bright eyes?

“Oh! And when you smile, you make my heart beat like crazy!” he chuckles. 

The first thing that caught Hyuck’s eyes when he had a crush on you was your bright smile. He believes that was the main reason that he fell for you. How you would always have a beaming smile plastered on your face everywhere you go. 

He thinks it’s adorable. 

The small dimples that was on the side of your lips whenever you smile. 

And your adorable little laugh he adores so much. 

Or the little birthmark you had on the corner of your mouth. 

After talking about you for a while, he let out a satisfied sigh, “I’m so whip for you, you know?”

After 17 days of making videos for you, it started becoming easier for him to show his love for you. 

“Everything you do makes me go crazy, do you realise that?” he asks you, “do you realize that everything you do makes me happy? No, you don’t have to do anything, your presence makes me melt.”

He laughs at how he was flirting, “you’re probably laughing too,”

His laughter died down, letting out a tired sigh, “well, it’s late and I’m going to go to bed before you nag at me some more,”

He let out a yawn, “goodnight y/n, I love you so much, you don’t know how happy you make me,”

+Day 20 2:56PM

This time, it was different. 

He was filming himself at McDonalds drive-thru. 

“Guess who’s this for?” he asks the camera, his gaze on the road. “Yes, you.”

He turns to look at the camera for a second before paying attention on the road, “you didn’t ask me to get you anything but I wanted to get something for you,” he explains. 

He was lying, this was just an excuse to see you, even for a second. Even if it’s 6 feet apart. Even if there was a glass between the both of you. 

“I think you know the reason why I’m buying this for you,” he says, referring to the food. “To make you fat! You’re right, y/n,” he jokes. 

That was also a lie. You tend to eat less whenever you’re stressed. 

After he found out that you had a project, he knew how stress you would be, and decided to get food, making sure you eat healthily. 

Your boyfriend would never fail to remind you how much he loves your body. No matter shape or size. He has always made sure you feel loved with who you are. 

“I think you know the real reason why I’m coming over,” he adds. When he reaches a red light, he turns to look at the camera with a pout, “I can’t help it, I miss you too much, y/n,” he says in a baby voice. 

He grimaces at his actions, shaking his head disapprovingly, “I am never doing that ever again.”

A few minutes later, he reached your house. He had texted you to that he was waiting for you outside. 

It took you a while to come out, but when you did, you had one of his hoodies over your body. 

He loves it when you wear his clothes, it makes him feel all giddy. 

‘One day, I’m going to wear all of your clothes’ he would say whenever you steal his clothes. 

You walked over to his car, “what the hell are you doing here, dummy,” you ask him, maintaining the distance. 

He grabbed the bag of food from the passenger’s seat and passed it to you from the window of his car. 

“Brought you food, you unappreciative bitch,” he tells you while you walk up to grab the food from him. 

You open the bag to see your favourite food, “my favourite food, too?!” you squeal, “Haechan best boyfie~”

He rolls his eyes, “yeah, yeah, go and finish your project,”

You nodded, the smile not leaving your face. 

“I’ll facetime you later?” he asks. 

“At 11,” you confirmed. 

He nods, signalling for you to go back in. You blow a kiss to your boyfriend before turning around to go back in. 

He quickly fishes out his camera, filming you walking back in your house. 

“Look at my baby all happy because I brought her food,” he says, “enjoy your food, pretty,”

+Day23 6:07PM

“Day 23,” he breathes out. “I didn’t expect it to go by so fast,” he blurts out. 

He puffs his cheeks out, “I don’t want to stop making videos for you, but you would just make fun of me for being soft,”

He had started growing content on making videos for you every day. 

“But at the same time, I can finally see you after a month, babe!” he says happily. “I can finally hold you in my arms, we can kiss until the world ends, we can also do it,” he says, wiggling his eyebrows. 

Well, he can’t lie he did miss doing it with you. 

He sighs, “anyway, when we can finally get together, we can watch movies, then come back to my place and we can cuddle!”

He missed that. 

Personally, Donghyuck preferred going over to your place but you preferred going to his place because he had games and a huge bed, and it was just comfortable. 

“Ahh,” he groan, “I miss you like crazy! I think I have to end this video early because I wanna facetime you right now,”

He grabs his phone on the table to call you. 

“Okay, bye babe, I love you, I’m going to talk to you now!”

+Day 25 4:03AM

“Hi,” donghyuck greet the camera. 

Anyone could realise he wasn’t in the best mood. 

It took Donghyuck a while to start talking, “we had a fight earlier today,” he says, his voice lace with disappointment and… hurt?

You had texted him just an hour ago, ranting about your homework. When Donghyuck replied to you a minute later, you got angry at him because he was staying up again at ungodly hours. 

He didn’t understand why you were so angry because you were awake at the same timing as he is. 

“I’m going to give you space, because it’s what you need right now,” he says. “I hope you know I still love you no matter what,”

He bit his lip hesitantly, “I know you don’t like it when I stay up with the boys, but I don’t like you staying up to finish your work either, baby”

He closes his eyes shut for a moment, taking a deep breath. “I hope you don’t get too stressed over school, eat healthily, and make sure you rest from time to time, babygirl,”

He lets out another sigh before reaching for the camera, “I love you,”

+Day 28 7:36PM

 Haechan purses his lips, staring at the camera, “today is a bad day,” he starts. 

Today he had woke up a little earlier than normal after talking it out with you a few days ago. He decided to get up early and help his mom with cooking, which only resulted him in getting scolded by his mother for making a mess. 

After that, he decided to play games with his friends, however despite playing for 5 hours straight, he didn’t get a single win. 

Now, he has tried to contact you, but you have not replied to him. Probably busy with school. 

He let out a huff, “take a break y/n,” he whines, “focus on me too~”

Letting out a pout he shakes his head, “kidding babe, get those A’s!”

“Well, now I don’t really have anything to do so I’m going to facetime you again, bye babe!”

+Day 30 10:18AM

“Hyuckie!” you call out, running to your boyfriend. When you reached him, you threw your arms around your boyfriend’s neck, making him stumble back a few steps as he grabs on your waist. 

You hid your face in his neck, breathing in his scent. He smells so good.

“You’re not going to let go of me until I say so,” you mumble, tightening your grip around his neck.

He chuckles at you, “I won’t let go of you until you say so,” 

Donghyuck was satisfied with having his arms wrapped around your waist, his face covered in your hair. 

After a few moments of the both of you just holding each other, you finally pull away from your boyfriend. 

“Y/n,” he says, making you hum.

“Wait,” you stop him, making him stare at you with wide eyes as he froze on the spot. 

“Can you kiss me first?” you ask. His eyes soften at your request. Your fingers trace his bottom lips, “I miss your pretty lips.”

He smiles at your words and nodded. Pulling you closer by your waist, he pressed his lips against yours. Your hands rest on his chest while you both share a needy kiss. 

After a few minutes, you pull away, breathless with crimson red cheeks.

Haechan raised his eyebrows as he resumed, “I made something for you,”

You gasped, “what is it?”

He fishes out a CD player. The CD held videos of him explaining how much he loves and appreciates you throughout the whole month. 

He passes you the gift. 

“Watch this at home?” he tells you. 

You grab the CD from his grip, “okay? What is this all about?”

“Just promise me you’ll watch it at home?” he asks again, staring down at you. 

“I will! I will!” 

After making videos of himself for 29 days straight, Donghyuck have concluded that he was so utterly in love with you. He was so in love with you that he didn’t know how to express how much he adores you.

[toomanystoriessolittletime]

late night calls

Summary: It all started with a phone call to the DEA office to tell Javier about the surgery of his father. You had insisted to take care of him after Chucho told you about the surgery. That you would fall in love with his son you had never met before? Just as surprising to you as it was to Javier.

Pairing: Javier Peña x F!Plus size reader

Wordcount: 4.1k+

Warnings: fluff, phone sex, mentions of bomb attacks, sexism, self doubt, yearning?

A/N: I know that probably more time passed between the bombing and Javier being send back to the states but I chose to ignore it. For the plot. Hope you enjoy it :)

Masterlist

*taglist in reblog

You still weren’t used to the heat. Yes, you did move to Texas because you wanted a fresh start. But the fucking heat would take some time to get used to. Nothing was holding you back in Maine. You had spent the last years taking care of your sick mother. She had died just before Christmas and with her all the family you had left. 

So coming with the new year you took a leap of faith, packed your things, and moved to a little town close to the Mexican border. You got a job at the local police station as a secretary that made a decent sum of money each month. Life was good. At least you told yourself so. 

You had made a couple of friends. Mostly the older generation of the town. You weren’t big on going out, nor had the town a big nightlife in the first place. That’s why you insisted on taking care of Chucho after he told you one day at the diner that he had to get a hip replacement. His wife had died a long time ago and his son wasn’t able to leave work.

“Don’t you have some better stuff to do cariño?” He had asked.

“What better way to start your day than on your Farm, Senior Peña.” You had winked at him.

Chucho might have been a stubborn old man, but once he got out of surgery and was in pain he was thankful that he accepted your help. That was also the first time you heard him talk about his son. Javier.

“Be a dear and call him to tell him I’m okay?” He had mumbled before he dozed off again. You had chuckled, kissed his cheek before you left him for the day to went over to his farm. Once you had taken care of everything for the day you sat down on his kitchen island and grabbed the phone, dialing the first number he had written down.

You had suggested moving into his place in his recovery time. It was a beautiful place. Mexico was just on the other side of the river down the property. But the best part about this place was the air conditioning. Okay… You really loved this place and it definitely was an upgrade to the small apartment you were renting in the city. 

Waiting for his son to pick up the phone you wondered what kind of job he would have that he wasn’t able to take care of his father. You didn’t judge him, okay maybe a little, you were more curious. You had seen some pictures of him spread through the house. But you had never asked about him.

“DEA Office, how may I help you?” A woman answered your call.

“Uhm… Is Javier Peña available? It’s about his father,” you tried.

“Oh of course. Agent Peña just got in. Please hold.”

Agent Peña? DEA? You had so many questions but they died on your tongue when the call connected again.

“This is Peña.” A deep voice said. He reminded you of his father.

“Hello Mr. Peña. I’m only calling to let you know that your father’s surgery went fine. He wanted me to forward this to you.”

“Javier, please. Not even my father likes to be called Mr. Peña.” 

“Oh I noticed that,” you chuckled.

“He’s fine yeah?” You heard something shuffle on the other end of the line. 

“Yeah. Already made some jokes and told me to make sure I feed the horses in the right order.”

“You’re taking care of the horses?”

“Yeah. I’m temporarily moving in to help your father.”

“That’s very nice of you. He never told me about you.”

“There’s not much to tell.” You got up and took out a bottle of water from the fridge. “I’m only here for the air conditioning.” You joked. He laughed.

“Fuck I miss air conditioning. Hold on.” You sat down again, hearing only damp voices.

“Fuck. I need to go. Please call me if something comes up. Dad has my home number too, right?” He was speaking quickly and you wondered what was happening. 

“Yes, he wrote it down for me. Everything okay?”

“Yeah hopefully. Just some work stuff. Keep in touch, yeah?”

“Will do Javier.”

Chucho got home a week later and he was the worst at listening to doctors’ orders. You still had to go into the station to work, but you spend your whole time worrying about him. It was funny to you how he seemingly had become a father figure to you in less than a couple of weeks. 

Of course you found him standing at the kitchen counter when you got to the ranch, the phone tugged between his shoulder and his ear, making himself a sandwich.

“Shouldn’t you be resting?” You asked, crossing your arms in front of your chest.

“I was. Then Javi called and I got hungry.” 

“Stubborn old man,” you grumbled and he rolled his eyes.

“Come on, I brought dinner.”

“Fine. Here. Javi wants to say Hello,” he handed you the phone before he slowly trotted towards the couch. Shaking your head you put the phone to your ear.

“You are really strict with him,” Javier said.

“Someone has to. Are all you Peña men this stubborn?” 

He chuckled. “You have no idea. How is he doing?”

“Overall good. Not complaining as much as in the beginning but then again I am bribing him with my delicious cooking.”

Javier and you had spoken to each other at least two times per week since the first time you called to tell him about his father’s surgery. You learned that he was a DEA agent on the hunt for Pablo Escobar. You learned that he was feeling guilty about not being there for his father and to take care of the ranch. You learned lots of things about Javier Peña. 

“Ah... Delicious cooking. Maybe one day you get to cook for me?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” You teased, hearing him take a sip of his drink. Whiskey probably. 

“Just that my father is praising your cooking so much I wonder if it really is that good.”

“Oh, it is, Peña.” You found yourself smiling. You heard him sigh.

“Everything’s okay over there?” You asked.

“Yeah,” he said too quickly. Definitely a lie. You nodded.

“You wanna stay on the phone while I prepare dinner?” you asked.

“Yeah,” he whispered.

The better Chucho got, the longer the phone calls between Javier and you seem to get. It was mostly at night after he got home from whatever he had been doing at work that day intending to check in on his father. But after a few sentences, he asked about your day. About how you felt. What your plans for the coming weekend were. 

“You sound exhausted Hermosa,” he sighed. It had been a long day at work and all you wanted was to grab a pint of ice cream and drown your sorrows.

“Just the usual sexist bullshit at the PD,” you groaned.

“Want me to kill them?” Javier joked.

“You take care of your nemesis, I take care of mine. But I appreciate the help.” You sat down on your bed, knowing that this was usually the room he occupied when he was here to visit his father. 

“Noted. But if it’s any help, I had a shit day too. They seem to get more frequent the longer I stay in this shithole.”

“Maybe you have to focus on the good things of being in this country. There have to be some. The food probably. I always enjoy new food. Maybe go to a museum? I don’t want to intrude but you don’t seem like you do anything besides work and well…”

It was pure accident that you had heard the voice of a woman one night when you had called him for a change. You knew that he looked good, you had seen the pictures, so it shouldn’t be a surprise to you, that he did have a girlfriend. He clarified that he didn’t, that this was just a woman he got intel from. You didn’t ask any more questions, it wasn’t your right. That it hurt to think of him and another woman was something you chose to ignore.

“I never thanked you,” Javier said. You let yourself fall back into bed, staring at the stars outside the window.

“What for?” you asked quietly.

“Thanking care of Dad and the ranch. Listening to my drunken ramblings. You’re a good friend,” he said. You smiled, a warm feeling spreading in your chest.

“You’re a good friend too, Javi.”

Chucho didn’t need anyone to take care of him. Not when he was back to his old health after a couple of months. But he had asked you to move in with him anyway. And you loved to live with the old man. Enjoying not being on your own all the time. And you loved helping him out at the ranch. The PD was still getting on your nerves and you were seriously considering just quitting.

“I hate it. I fucking hate it. I get one dumb line after another, just because I’m a woman. That I helped to get together the evidence to put that fucker away that killed all those women last year is not even of interest. FUCK!” you complained to Chucho. He knew about all of this already. Yet he jumped from his seat when he saw that you did cut yourself while making dinner.

“Careful.” He took your hand in his, leading you over to the sink to look at your wound. It didn’t hurt that much. 

“What about if I take care of dinner today, and you go and take a bath? Javier is probably gonna call in a bit…” Chucho winked, putting a bandaid on your finger.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” you frowned.

“Just that I see the way you smile every time my son calls.”

“Two whole days off? What are you gonna do with yourself?” You joked. You were laying in the bathtub, the phone in your hand as you talked to Javier.

“Don’t know. I feel like I need a home-cooked meal so I’m gonna nag Connie to cook one.”

You chuckled, crossing your legs.

“Is that water I hear?” he asked and you blushed. Why? You didn’t know. You had undressed numerous times while on the phone with him, but being completely naked and him knowing about it…

“I’m in the bathtub. Chucho’s orders. He’s making dinner before I kill myself doing it.”

You were met with silence.

“You okay, Javi?” You sucked your bottom lip in. “I did only cut my finger,” you joked.

“Just trying to get the picture of you naked in the bathtub out of my head.”

“You don’t even know what I look like.”

“Doesn’t matter. All I need is to hear your voice and I’m hard…”

“Javi…” you whispered, feeling hot all of the sudden.

“Will you tell me?” he asked.

“Tell you what?”

“If you think about me? Because you are on my mind all the time. I keep picturing how you look. If you have long hair or short hair. What color your eyes have. If your smile is only half as beautiful as your laugh. Fuck… I just wanna see you. I wanna feel you. I wanna taste you Hermosa.” 

Unintentionally your unoccupied hand had made its way down your body, your breath coming in short pants.

“Keep talking Javier…” you whispered, your hand slipping in between your legs.

“I want to touch you. Fuck I bet your skin is so soft. I’d worship you. I stay up at night wondering if I could fit your boobs in my hands. What sound you would make when I close my mouth around your nipple…”

“Shit Javi…” You moaned.

“I wonder how you taste. Are you wet for me baby?” he asked and you heard a zipper being undone on his end of the line.

“So wet. You always make me wet. I touch myself when we get off the phone, wondering how it would feel to have you here…” you whimpered.

“I would have fucked you on every flat surface in the house if I was there. The thought of you sleeping in my bed is making me lose my mind.”

You circled your clit with your fingers, a low moan coming from your lips.

“I wonder how you feel wrapped around my cock. I wonder how you sound when I make you cum. I want to hear it so badly…” You were sure he was fucking his hand and you whimpered at the thought.

“I wish it was my hand wrapped around your big cock right now. God, I wish it was your hand between my legs and not mine…” You bit your lips, keeping yourself quiet.

“Put two fingers into that cunt and make yourself cum. I wanna hear you…” he groaned on the phone. 

“Fuck Javi…” you cried quietly, two fingers inside your cunt. “I wish it was your cock and not my fingers.”

“Me too… Me too babe.” he moaned. “Circle that clit for me. Cum for me.”

Circling your clit you almost let the phone fall into the tub when you came with a low moan. You heard him cry out your name on the other end of the line before all that was heard was both of your heavy breathing. 

“Javi…?” you asked after a while, still high from one of the best orgasms you ever had. You heard the familiar sound of him lighting a cigarette.

“I meant every single word Hermosa. I want you.” You never thought you would hear these words from him or any man for that matter. You weren’t a typical beauty. You weren’t skinny, you loved food and your curves showed it. On most days you were happy with the way you looked. But you also knew how Javier looked. He was an attractive man and you knew he did indeed have a new woman every other night if he felt like it. He might be interested now, but once he would meet you, there was no way he would make true to all the things he said.

“You’re quiet.” he noticed.

“Yeah. Just coming down from the best orgasm I’ve had in a while,” you joked and he sighed.

“I might not see you, but I know that you’re lying.”

“Okay, it was the best orgasm I ever had.”

“Hermosa…”

“I don’t want to talk about it. Just let me enjoy the illusion of a handsome DEA Agent being interested in little ol’ me.”

“I’ll make sure you believe that it isn’t an illusion until we do see each other.”

Months went by and by now you were pretty sure you were in love with Javier Peña. The phone bill was taking dimensions you were almost guilty about, but Chucho only smiled not taking your money, telling you to make his boy happy. Safe to say he approved.

You had told him about your insecurities and Javier made sure to tell you every time you talked to each other that it didn’t matter how you looked. He told you that you could be green and he’d still go down on you the first time he would meet you.

And you wanted to believe him, you really did. You had told him how you looked after he tried to talk you into sending pictures of yourself “with or without clothes, I don’t care. Though you can guess what I prefer.” he had teased. Javier never made a secret about how much he liked you. Enjoyed talking to you. He told you he had stopped sleeping around for god’s sake. 

He was supposed to visit his father in a couple of weeks and the more time passed, the more nervous you became. You didn’t doubt that he meant every single word he said to you. It was years of being on the receiving end of jokes and being the ugly friend that automatically let you feel like you weren’t good enough.

The worst part was that you knew, deep down, that you were beautiful. You loved how you looked. But there still was this voice inside your head, telling you that you would never be good enough for anyone. That there was no way someone would ever fall in love with you.

It was a typical morning at work. You had your coffee and all the files you had to update. Javier had talked to you until you fell asleep, telling you that he felt like he was failing in taking Escobar down. He didn’t tell you much, not wanting you to worry or to risk someone listening, but you could tell that he was exhausted. “I fucked up, Hermosa. I really fucked up and I have no idea how to fix this,” were the words that he had whispered to you in the middle of the night. 

You didn’t ask what he meant, just telling him that you’d be there for him, no matter what.

Typing as usual you stopped as the song on the radio was, interrupted by a news report of a bombing in Bogota, Colombia. You knew that there were bombings all the time over there, and Javier always assured you that he was perfectly fine. But with how he was last night, you had a bad feeling.

“Fuck. When are they going to stop that shit over there? If I was there I’d caught Escobar years ago,” one of the officers said. You closed your eyes, breathing in deeply.

“Isn’t Chucho’s son over there pretty face?” The officer stopped in front of your desk and you opened your eyes.

“Yeah he is,” you said.

“Maybe if he would know how to do his job, shit like that wouldn’t go down like that,” he grinned and you wanted to stop, but your hand was faster. Slapping his cheek you got off your seat.

“And maybe if you would know how to use your dick your wife wouldn’t fuck your colleague over there, but you’ll never know, right?” You grinned, picking your purse and walking out.

“I’m taking today off.” You yelled over your shoulder as you walked to your car.

Javier didn’t pick up the phone. Which wasn’t what concerned you on the first day. He would have to deal with the shit that had happened over there. But when three days passed and you could see Chucho getting nervous as well you became restless. The ranch had never been so spotless. The horses had been fed in record time, and you took long rides along the river. If something had happened to him someone would have called, right? You couldn’t even reach his partner Murphy who you had talked to occasionally when Javier wasn’t at his desk. 

When a week passed and you hadn’t heard anything you were close to making your way to the airport to just fly down there. What if he died? What if he was gone and you hadn’t told him that you loved him? That you fell in love with a man you had never met before? Getting off the horse you sat down at the tree closest to the river. It was quiet here. This was the outer area of Chucho’s ranch, your favorite spot. You had joked about building a house here once when you were out with the old man and he had agreed that it would be the perfect spot. Sighing you drank from the bottle of water you brought.

Where the fuck are you Javier?

Another week went by without any sign of life from him. You had called the DEA office again but no one seemed to be able to give you an answer. You were growing restless. Working seemed to be the only thing that could get you off the spiraling thoughts of what if? You really had it bad for the man. Shaking your head to yourself you sighed as you parked your car on the usual spot in front of the ranch. Chucho’s truck was gone, he had a doctor's appointment to check on his hip and would meet his lady friend for dinner afterward. You had met her, Estella, once. She was a beautiful woman and Chucho seemed very happy with her. With a sad smile you killed the engine, getting out of the car. On your way to the house you groaned, turning around because you forgot your take out. You weren’t in the mood to cook and the pizza from that place that Javier had told you about was the best you had ever had. While you opened the passenger door of your car you heard the front door of the house open.

Shit. Burglars? You didn’t have anything on you, you could use as a gun. You knew you could probably make it to the horse stable to find something, but not in these fucking heels. Why did you wear these fucking heels? Maybe you could make them choke on the pizza? But then again you were looking forward to eating it. 

“Just take what you want, I won’t look.” You called over your shoulder, hoping to just be spared for the day. Closing your eyes you sighed when you were met with no reaction. You heard footsteps on the porch that stopped.

“Look, I’m really not in the mood for this bullshit today. So either take whatever the fuck you want or kill me….” you turned around and all the words died on your lips.

Standing there, leaning against the porch was no other than Javier fucking Peña. Alive. And looking even better than on the various pictures hanging in the house. He was bare feet, wearing tight jeans and a green shirt that was half undone. Opening your mouth to talk, all that came out was a gasp. He looked at you, his eyes mirroring the million emotions inside of you. Looking down at yourself you felt shy all of the sudden. This isn’t how you imagined meeting him for the first time. You wanted to be pretty. To wear some spanx. To have some make-up on. Closing your eyes you breathed in deep. You were happy to see him, you really were. But the ride of emotions you had gone through in the last couple of days took hold of you. Walking quickly towards him, you pushed against his chest, the air leaving his lungs in a puff.

“You fucking idiot. I thought you died.” You pushed him again.

“Do you have any idea how awful I felt since I heard the news of the bombing? You…” You pushed against his chest again, but this time he was faster, grabbing your wrists as he looked down at you. You felt the tears in your eyes as you finally looked up at him. Almost a year of phone calls and now he was standing here in front of you. Alive and warm. And smelling so fucking good.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered, holding both of your wrists against his chest as he looked at you. 

“I should have called but I told you I fucked up. Badly. And I had to fix it and…” he shook his head. “It doesn’t matter now. I’m here and fuck… you’re even more beautiful than I pictured you,” he smiled a little.

“Flattery will get you nowhere.” You huffed, still annoyed.

“No?” he asked teasingly, smirking at you as he leaned down. You shook your head, biting your lip. God, you wanted to kiss him. 

“Can I at least try?” he asked, his lips brushing over your temple. You swallowed, shivering when you felt his cheek against yours. Fuck. Why did he smell so good?

“You may try, but I’m really, really mad at you Javier.”

You closed your eyes when he released your wrists and put one of his hands on your back to push you closer against him. He kissed your cheek before he straightened to his full height and looked down at you, his other hand coming to rest on your cheek.

“You’re really sexy when you’re angry,” he teased before he leaned down to kiss you. You melted against him, your hands running up his chest, holding on to the back of his neck as one hand ran through his hair, to pull him down. Kissing him didn’t come close to anything you could have imagined, his tongue parting your lips and you couldn’t help the moan against his lips. 

“Still angry?” he whispered out of breath against your lips.

“Slightly less angry,” you whispered back before you found yourself in his arms as he carried you into the house.

[gaysimpsstuff]

Fatgum As a Dad

This was inspired by a conversation I had on a discord server, we all have daddy issues and want Fatgum to adopt us so here’s all the shit we collected.

There are some serious themes in here, mostly regarding the biological parents of the kid, but it’s vague as possible. If anyone wants me to add a trigger warning please let me know.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It all started when he was a kid, when he learned what an orphanage was. One of the kids in his class mentioned being from one, so when he got home he asked his parents about it. 

“Mom, what’s an orphanage?”

“Well, Taishiro, it’s where children that don’t have parents go. Then people can come and adopt the children. Why do you ask.”

“A kid at school said he’s from one, when d’you think he’s gonna get adopted?”

“He might, not all children get adopted. Some of them stay in the orphanage until they’re adults.”

“BUT THAT’S NOT FAIR!” he shouted. “EVERYONE DESERVES A HAPPY CHILDHOOD!”

“Well, honey, life’s not fair. And not everyone gets a happy life. It’s how most villains are made, actually. They were hurt more than everyone else and couldn’t handle it anymore. Not all villains are like that but many are. I think you should stay away from that kid, Taishiro. He might turn out a villain.”

But he didn’t stay away. And he made it his mission to become a pro hero so he could make a ton of money and help as many people as he could. He’d help even villains, keep them from doing something dangerous and inspire hope in them.

Then, he’d adopt any kid who needed a father. All the orphanages and foster programs would be empty. Homeless children off the street and in his house, being fed and clothed. He’d care for each and every one of them, not wanting a single person to feel like they didn’t belong. 

He finds most of his kids at pride parades. He walks around with a shirt that says ‘FREE DAD HUGS’ and a box full of candy. He remembered one of the kids walking up to him slowly.

“Um.. are you Fatgum?” 

“Yes I am!”

“Can I have a hug?”

“Yes you can, Kiddo!” he got down, and the kid put his arms on his stomach (Fatgum’s too big for anyone to fully hug, the dude’s taller than Allmight!) he wrapped his arms around the kid before he heard sniffles. He looked down and saw that the kid was crying.

“M-my parents never hug me like this!” they exclaimed. “They haven’t since I came out. They want to kick me out when I turn thirteen!” 

“Can I have their number? I’m going to... talk to them.”

He ended up taking the kid’s family to court, and since the parents were going to just kick the kid out anyways, they let Fatgum adopt them, but they kept nagging him about how he was ‘going to be raising a little demon.’

“Then call me Lucifer.” he spat right back. Now, that kid’s grown up, has pride flags all around their walls, and doesn’t ever doubt that they’re loved.

Fatgum probably bakes with his kids. Helping them up onto the counter to mix ingredients and play with the dough. If they mess something up or break a glass, it’s fine. He doesn’t yell at them or sigh and shake his head, he just kissed the kid on the forehead and helps them clean up the mess. 

The food always turns out amazing, and Fatgum always tells the kids that. All of his kids are now Gordon Ramsay level chefs and have probably met Gordon Ramsay. 

No matter what their body type is, Fatgum tells his kids their handsome/beautiful and are model worthy. If anyone comments of one of his kid’s body, whether it be negative or... ‘positive’ in a creepy way, you can expect that they’re getting slammed into the ground. No questions asked.

One of Fatgum’s kids is really good at make-up. Like, really good. So Fatgum did the only thing a rational father would do. 

Ask for a make-up job.

It didn’t end all that well...

“Hold still.. I gotta get the eyeliner on.”

“Gosh, Kiddo it’s making my eyes water.” 

“I know, just hold still... aaaand...... done! Now don’t touch it or it’ll smear!”

“Wow, that looks great! You’re really good at this!”

“Thanks, dad- you smeared it already didn’t you?”

“....Nope.”

Fatgum: I'm not gonna do it, it just seemed like a good option. 

Fatgum not even two seconds later after seeing a trans kid crying: now carrying said child on his shoulders while his spouse is chuckling in a corner after signing adoption papers I did it.

This man would get his kids almost anything they wanted. Especially kids with ADD/ADHD/Autism/Tourettes/Anxiety who need stim toys.

Kid: chewing on their nails.

Fatgum: here take this stim toy, and this one, you chew this one so that might help-

Kid ends up with more stim toys than they can count.

Fatgum: just doing his job 

The Daddy Issues Gang: Hi dad- oh shit wait- Hi- I- fuck- trauma ensues. crying

Fatgum: grabs the daddy issues gang we're going to the nearest courtroom say hello to your new father its me im the father ok lets go.

Kid: um, dad can I talk to you? 

 Fatgum, turning around quickly: yes? 

 Me: ‘he moved so quick, he's mad at me, I'm gonna get yelled at’ Sorry, sorry! 

Fatgum: uh, no. I'm getting you ice cream and a new stuffed animal no questions asked

He'd just know when something's wrong, and he’d be great at comforting.

His usual style of comfort is to let the kid sit on his stomach and tell him what’s wrong. His body is one giant pillow for his kids to lay on, he can fit at least eight of them if they cuddle in closely.

Once filmed a commercial dressed as the Cool-Aid man, and all of his kids were in the commercial.

Fatgum: Busts down wall  “OH YEAH!”

Director: “And CUT! Okay, try a little more aggressive-”

Fatgum, in tears: “I don’t wanna scare my kids.”

As stated before, if anyone makes his kids feel bad he’s punching them to the ground, but sometimes he’s not in a position where he can do that. Like if a Karen mom ever comes over.

"Linda stop bringing lemon squares if you're going to talk about my son that way because they're just as sour as your attitude."

Fatgum but he slaps the toxic members of your family and tells them to do better or he's taking you.

Then takes you anyway because you prefer him.

Fatgum with a sweater that says ‘mr dad guy on it’

Fatgum definitely watches ATLA, and quotes Uncle Iroh daily. When his kids are minding their own business they suddenly hear

“Leaves from the vine... falling so slow...” 

INAUDIBLE CHAOS AND PANIC

Fatgum agency cosplayed ATLA characters on Halloween.

Fatgum was Iroh.

Kirishima was Sokka.

Tamaki was either Momo or Appa.

Maybe get a couple others in on it too, Mirio could be Aang and if Kirishima convinces Todoroki to join for a while he’d totally be Zuko.

Fatgum lets his kids squish his face.

Fatgum used to work with a hero who was hard of hearing, so he learned sign language to help them, and he’s got the skill saved in case one of his kids might be deaf.

So one day, Kirishima invites Bakugou on patrol with him, and we all love that headcanon of Bakugou going deaf, so when he gets pissed at something, he starts insulting everyone around him in SL.

Fatgum notices and starts signing back to him.

YOU’RE ALL MOTHERFUCKERS AND I HATE YOU ALL!

Hey, now, let’s calm down and not call everyone motherfuckers.

FUCK YOU TOO

Bakugou...

Everyone thinks that they’re doing magic, because they’re making all these shapes with their hands and keep looking offended at each other.

Now, Fatgum tries his gosh darn hardest to keep up with the memes, so when his kids come home with good grades, he says “That’s so pog, Kiddo!”

All of his kids are embarrassed.

In the middle of a battle, he throws Kirishima at a villain and they both scream “YEET!” the villain afterwords forever lives in fear of the word ‘yeet’ because he thinks it’ll result in a human rock being thrown at his face.

Fatgum can’t text very well, because his fingers are just too damn big-

sonhsisntextsblooklikehthis'

Translation: so his texts look like this

you learn to understand his texts

Someone better get him a large tablet instead of a phone

If he gets married after he adopts the kids, there’s going to be a huge competition over who does the rings and who does the flowers etc.

If any of his kid’s ever bring home a romantic partner, you can bet your ass he’ll be all over them.

“What’s your average grade?”

“E-eighty percent sir!”

“And do you take sports?”

“No sir, I wish to be a biologist.”

“I see, I see...”

“DAD, YOU AREN”T INTERVIEWING MY PARTNER, ARE YOU? YOU SCARED OFF THE LAST THREE I DON’T WANNA DEAL WITH THAT AGAIN!”

“SORRY, KIDDO! I’LL LET THEM GO NOW! I’ve got my fucking eyes on you. Don’t screw this up.”

Hope y’all enjoy this, if y’all want I can write some headcanons for if Fatgum’s kid becomes a villain-

[schrijverr]

Translation Error

Bakugo’s mom is Dutch and at home, he speaks Dutch. He hadn’t realized the class hadn’t caught on yet, until he’s calling with his mom. After that, they notice more Dutch things.

(AKA, I’m Dutch and I’m having fun with making Bakugo Dutch as well)

On AO3.

Ships: none

Warnings: none, but tell me if I missed anything!

~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bakugo Mitsuki had not always been a Bakugo, she’d not even always been Mitsuki. Before she was a Bakugo, she had been a Jansen, Marjolein Jansen, and her parents had moved from the Netherlands to Japan for her fathers job.

But that had been when she was eleven and she was fluent in Dutch, teaching it to her son when he was young.

They were a multi-lingual household with Mitsuki swearing in Dutch as she stubbed her toe while Masaru told Bakugo to put on his shoes in Japanese.

Katsuki took great pride in the fact that he spoke two languages, often teaching swearwords in Dutch to the other kids on the playground.

However, after a few years the novelty had worn of for most and it became just another fact of life that Kastuki would sometimes swear under his breath in a different language or forget an easy word only to grumble a weird word until he had found the translation.

Being in a Japanese school and watching Japanese media, however, ensured that Katsuki was much more comfortable in Japanese than Dutch. Even if Dutch was the language he spoke at home, so by the time he entered UA, he hardly ever spoke Dutch outside of his mom and grandparents.

Since he hardly ever spoke Dutch, it took a long while for everyone in his class to even notice that he could speak another language.

Of course, when you were running for your life it was hard to notice that your friend was chanting “kut, kut, kut, kut,” under his breath instead of a more familiar swear and you didn’t see them talking to their mom at school.

So, it wasn’t until they moved into the dorms together that people started to notice it.

The first instance was mostly brushed off. Bakugo and Midoriya had been talking about hero training classes when Bakugo said: “We never really did more- more- more,” he snapped his fingers, obviously annoyed, and grumbled, “godverdomme, reddingswerk, wat is dat ook alweer?” he looked at Midoriya and repeated, “Reddingswerk?”

Midoriya shrugged, he didn’t know what the Dutch word meant. Bakugo groaned, before explaining: “What we did with Thirteen.”

“Rescue?” Midoriya offered.

“Yeah, that’s the bitch,” Bakugo said, “We never really did more rescue work after that, now did we.”

“Hmm, yeah, we should ask Iida about that, as class rep, he might be able to do something about it,” Midoriya agreed and the conversation continued normally.

He already knew of the Dutch and hadn’t been phased by it, while most the class had only heard the tone Bakugo used, which was as usual annoyed and angry, not really registering the language as different.

The next time someone could have noticed, but didn’t was when he was helping Kaminari with his English homework. Kaminari groaned: “How can you keep track of all these letters? It’s so confusing.”

“I already knew the alphabet,” Bakugo shrugged, remembering how his mother had showed him how to write down his name differently and the fairytales she used to read to him.

“That’s nice, wish that were me,” Kaminari said miserably, looking at his homework.

“It’s still fucking confusing,” Bakugo huffed, thinking of the English pronouncing ‘a’ as ‘e,’ while pronouncing ‘e’ as ‘i,’ or why they couldn’t say the ‘w’ like a normal person. He blinked out of his thoughts and said: “Oi, focus again, Battery-boy.”

Kaminari startled and whined, but turned back to his homework with much displeasure.

A few days later, Bakugo stubbed his toe on the table near the couches when he got up to grab himself something to drink. He grabbed his foot and swore: “Godver de tering zooi. Kut, kut, kut. Holy shit, godver. Wat een tyfus tafel. Fuck that hurt. Klere ding.”

Everyone blinked at the outburst, before Mina asked: “What the fuck was that?”

“That’s called swearing, Raccoon,” Bakugo glared at her, “Who even put this table here?”

“The school, idiot,” Jiro shrugged, not really looking further into the weird noises that had come out of Bakugo’s mouth, because she didn’t think it above him to know obscure swears, just to add to his repertoire.

Bakugo glared at her as well, but the throbbing in his toe had subsided and he wasn’t really looking to pick a fight when they were about to watch a movie. So he dropped it and just went to grab himself a drink.

It was not until his mother called him that people truly caught on to the fact that it was an entirely different language, instead of some weird swears here and there. His phone rang while on the couch and he groaned when he saw who was calling.

Kirishima asked: “Who’s mama?”

“It’s my mom, dumbass,” he said, before swiping to pick up and saying: “Hallo met is Katsuki, waarom bel je me, heks?”

The person on the other side of the line said something, while Kirishima and Mina stared in confusion at the incomprehensible babble coming out of Bakugo’s mouth.

“Kon dat niet wachten?” Bakugo replied after a moment, getting up to get a bit of privacy as he spoke, “Ik zit hier beneden nu met mensen, we zijn ons huiswerk aan het doen. En dat is pas over een week, ook nog, by the way. Waarom val je me daar nu mee lastig?”

Midoriya came in and Mina whispered to him: “What’s he doing?” with a nod to Bakugo.

The other boy looked at Bakugo just as he said: “Nee, ik heb het al met Aizawa besproken, ik kan gewoon dat weekend naar huis komen. Hij snapte ‘t toen ik uitlegde dat opa en oma van ver komen.”

So, Midoriya shrugged: “Talking with his mom, I suppose. I don’t speak Dutch, sorry.”

“Why is he even speaking Dutch?” Kirishima asked, completely confused.

“Because his mom is Dutch.” Midoriya was confused by Kirishima’s confusion, surely they knew this already?

A few more people walked in and looked between the three confused teens and Bakugo, who was oblivious to the stares Mina and Kirishima were giving him.

He nodded even though his mom couldn’t see and said: “Ja, dat weet ik. Ik heb het opgeschreven. Ik ben niet achterlijk hoor, heks. Natuurlijk vergeet ik ‘t niet.”

A silence fell, in which the newcomers also had a chance to be confused. Then Bakugo hung up with a: “Ja, ja, doei, spreek je later. Doe de groeten aan papa enzo.”

Bakugo turned back to see half the class looking at him and he snapped: “What are you all looking at, eh?”

Midoriya, god bless his heart, spoke up for everyone and explained: “I think they only just realized you’re half-Dutch.”

“Why? Are they dumb?” Bakugo frowned, he hadn’t made the conscious effort to hide it.

“Oi, we’re not dumb,” Mina got out of her stupor.

“Yeah, Bakubro, you could have told us,” cried Kirishima.

“What is that thought?” Bakugo said, “Should I have made an announcement out of it? Do the klompendans while hanging out the Dutch flag? Like what do you want from me? I didn’t even try to hide it.”

It was quiet for a moment as most had to concede that was a pretty solid point. In the end Tsu asked him: “Can you say something in Dutch?”

“Am I a circus monkey or something?” Bakugo growled.

Hagakure jumped in as well: “Please, Bakugo, I missed most of the phone call, I wanna hear what it sounds like.”

More people rallied behind her and Bakugo gave in, saying: “Jullie zijn allemaal stom en ik haat het hier.”

“What did you say?” Mina asked.

“I said that you’re all stupid and I hate it here,” Bakugo said, before turning to walk away.

During dinner that evening more people nagged him. Mina and Kirishima wanted to know what the phone call was about (it was his mom asking if he had gotten permission to come home to see his grandparents next weekend) and the people who hadn’t been there to see wanted to hear what Dutch sounded like (Bakugo hit the closest of said people and told them nothing).

After a while, Momo mused: “I thought your mother’s name was Mitsuki. That’s a pretty Japanese name.”

“Her actual name is Marjolein, but no one ever pronounced or wrote it right, so she just says it’s Mitsuki,” Bakugo shrugged.

“How do you even spell that?” Kaminari wondered.

“You’re not good enough at the Roman alphabet for me to spell it out to you,” Bakugo told him, before adding: “And I’m not sure if it’s the long ij or the short ei.”

Kaminari frowned at the insult, then said: “You just made the same noise twice.”

“Yeah, but one is i j and the other is e i,” Bakugo explained, “It’s the same sound, okay. You just write it differently. I think it’s the short ei, but I never use that name for her. I’ve only heard opa en oma call her that.”

“Who?” Kirishima asked.

“My grandparents, like grandpa is opa and oma is grandma,” Baugo said, hoping they would stop asking him questions, because he was tired of explaining and he just wanted to eat his dinner in peace.

Luckily most had caught on to his annoyed tone and left him alone, but Bakugo could feel that this was something new and interesting that would hold their attention for a while.

He was right, because that week he was often asked what the Dutch word for something was or what the thing he just said was (it was usually swears), but he managed to survive ‘till Friday when he got to leave campus for the weekend.

They were walking back to the dorms, so that Bakugo could grab his stuff, before leaving to go see his grandparents, when he got a notification. He looked and said: “Fuck yeah, m’n opa en oma brought me hagelslag.”

“What is that?” Kirishima asked.

“It’s- uhm, beleg- stuff you put on bread,” Bakugo explained, knowing this was very a Dutch thing and was already pretty weird in countries that ate bread regularly, “I’ll probably bring it with me Monday.”

The others nodded and Bakugo said goodbye, before leaving, excited to see his grandparents again after so long. They had moved back to the Netherlands when he was five, saying they missed their country. He didn’t understand, because it always rained in the Netherlands when he’d been there and he got nearly hit by a bike multiple times.

He had a blast that weekend by excluding his dad from as many conversations as possible while catching up with his grandparents.

Returning on Monday, he had to do a double take when Kirishima greeted him in Japanese and asked how his weekend had been, before he remembered that it wasn’t all Dutch anymore. He said it was good, before sliding into his seat.

That lunch break he got out some sweets from his bag, reluctantly sharing them with his friends: “They gave these to me, something about their youth and shit. Whatever.”

Mina held up a little brown stick like candy and asked: “What’s this?”

“A kaneelstokje,” Bakugo answered, seeing her helpless look, he expanded: “It’s - what that fucking word again - kaneel, uhm… ah, yeah, cinnamon. It’s a cinnamon stick. When you bite it feels weird, but they’re nice. I also have the cherry version.”

With a curious hum Mina stuck it in her mouth, then she bit and grimaced, before mumbling: “That was harder than I expected.”

“Your mistake,” Bakugo shrugged, shoving a stroopwafel in his mouth.

A few tables over Midoriya spotted them and skipped over, asking Bakugo: “Did they give you those pig head candies?”

“Biggetjes?” Bakugo asked, “Yeah, here. I don’t like these, but they keep giving me them. I would much rather have the monkey ones.”

“Those have licorice on them, Kacchan,” Midoriya made a face.

“They’re nice, now fuck off, nerd,” Bakugo grumbled.

“Pig heads?” Hagakure asked.

“Yeah, it’s in the shape of a pig head and it’s a fruit gummy,” Bakugo shrugged, “The ears are slightly different and the monkey version is part licorice.”

“That’s weird,” Mina told him.

“Then you’re not getting more candy,” Bakugo shot back.

“No, I wanna try the cookies. I’m sorry,” Mina quickly said.

With an eyeroll Bakugo handed her a stroopwafel, explaining that it was a hard waffle with hardened syrup between it. He had eaten them hot and soft once and he didn’t get the rave about them fresh of the hotplate, he much preferred them cold.

They ate the foreign candy with interest asking about them and laughed about the guttural pronunciation that it had to them, marveling how Bakugo could make the hard ‘g’ sound, while they struggled.

And the next morning the whole class came together to stare in horror at Bakugo’s breakfast. He had put butter on a slice of bread, then put chocolate sprinkles on it. When Jiro had asked what the fuck he was eating, he scowled and said: “It’s hagelslag, okay, Earbuds.”

“That’s hagelslag?” Kirishima asked, stumbling over the word.

“Yeah,” Bakugo, “Almost everyone eats it. You also have vlokken, but that’s just hagelslag except flat and a bit bigger, though they also have hagelslag XL. There’s also a fruit version, but that’s just flavored hardened sugar.”

Uraraka looked at Bakugo’s plate and said: “This just feels off.”

“Well, then don’t look at, ey, Round-face,” Bakugo growled as he hunched protectively over his plate.

“Can I try?” Kirishima asked.

Bakugo eyed him suspiciously, before handing him a bit of his bread. He watched as Kirishima tried it, face morphing into a grin as he said: “Dutch kids are lucky. They get to eat chocolate for breakfast. Are you sure parents condone this?”

“My grandfather has never eating anything different for breakfast in his life,” Bakugo said.

“Nice.”

And with that they decided that this wasn’t really something to get on the blond’s nerves about, since it wasn’t really a big deal, and the conversation moved on to different topics.

But the knowledge that Bakugo was multilingual settled as normal in the group over time and explained how here and there he would say something incredibly weird, seemingly thinking it’s normal.

No one had commented on it before, but now it was easier to understand why.

For example, when they were having a collaborative training with class 1-B, Kirishima punched Bakugo’s arm and said: “You should give a pep-talk. Come on, Bakubro, inspire us.”

“Nah, Midoriya is better at sticking a heart under someone’s belt than I am, he should do it,” he replied.

“What?” Kirishima asked, confused

“You know, encouraging people and shit?” Bakugo asked, only getting more confusion back, “No, not Japanese?”

“No, bro,” Kirishima grinned.

“Well, it still makes sense,” Bakugo grouched.

“I would say no,” Mina commented.

“Shut up, Raccoon,” Bakugo huffed, “It makes sense. You give someone your heart for courage and the best place to store it is on your belt. Like in Medieval times.”

“Still weird.”

“And you still have to shut up,” Bakugo shot back, “Just focus on beating those pompous motherfuckers.”

Because in the end, it didn’t matter which language he spoke, he stayed Bakugo. Swearing and competitive Bakugo.

~~

A/N:

Fun fact: a lot of foreigners have trouble with our ‘g’ which somehow can also be written as ‘ch’ as well as our double vowels, like ‘aa’ and ‘ee’

As for all the translations:

Kut means cunt, literally, but it is used like you would use shit (and yes, learning the verb cut in English class was very fun and completely misused)

“Godver de tering zooi. Kut, kut, kut. Holy shit, godver. Wat een tyfus tafel. Fuck that hurt. Klere ding.”

Goddamn the [swear] mess. Cunt, cunt, cunt. Holy shit, goddamn. What a [swear] table. Fuck that hurt. [Swear] thing.

When I put [swear] it’s bc I cannot explain why we swear with it and I do not want to put in the mental effort of explaining it and just saying it will make it sound worse than it actually is

The phone convo isn’t really interesting, but if anyone wants to know what Bakugo said:

“Hi, het is Katsuki, waarom bel je me, heks?”

Hi, it’s Katsuki, why are you calling me, witch?

“Kon dat niet wachten?”

Couldn’t that wait?

“Ik zit hier beneden nu met mensen, we zijn ons huiswerk aan het doen. En dat is pas over een week, ook nog, by the way. Waarom val je me daar nu mee lastig?”

I’m sitting downstairs with people right now, we’re doing our homework. And that’s in a week, as well, by the way. Why are you bothering me with that now?

“Nee, ik heb het al met Aizawa besproken, ik kan gewoon dat weekend naar huis komen. Hij snapte ‘t toen ik uitlegde dat opa en oma van ver komen.”

No, I already talked about it with Aizawa, I can just go home that weekend. He understood when I explained that grandpa and grandma came from far.

“Ja, dat weet ik. Ik heb het opgeschreven. Ik ben niet achtelijk hoor, heks. Natuurlijk vergeet ik ‘t niet.”

Yes, I know. I wrote it down. I’m not an idiot, witch. Of course I wouldn’t forget it.

“Ja, ja, doei, spreek je later. Doe de groeten aan papa enzo.”

Yes, yes, bye, talk to you later. Say hi to dad etc.

Only when translating this phone call did I realize how many filler words we have that don’t make sense in translation, so I just left them.

[mgg-theprettiestboy]

cross my heart (pt.3)

spencer reid x oc

cross my heart masterlist

word count: 1103

“Pretty boy’s got his head in the clouds.” Spencer snapped out of his daydream to find the source of the teasing sing-son voice. As suspected, it had come from Derek, who had a grin plastered on his face, “thinking about someone, huh Reid?”

“I’m thinking about the case,” he said, standing from his chair to go over to the poster board and pin another crime scene photo up.

“Uh huh, sure. C’mon, man, you know you can tell me anything,” Derek said, leaning back against the table covered in files and watching Spencer take a step back to view the whole pin board, his tongue darting out over his lips before he spoke, “there must be a key component of the profile that we’re missing, or we’re wrong about.”

He sighed, “okay kid, you don't wanna talk about it, that’s fine. But you know I’m always here if you do. So, what do you think we messed up? Maybe the gender?”

Spencer glanced to his friend, giving him an small appreciative smile before getting back to work.

-

“I’m glad you’ve found a nerd friend.”

Raye rolled her eyes, setting another mug down for Tamara to dry. This was one of those nights when The Hideout was completely empty. They usually had at least three or four people in at this unreasonable hour, but for once, there was a quiet period in the cafe.

“Thanks. And he’s not a nerd. Well, maybe a little. He’s a literature nerd, that’s for sure,” Raye said, and Tamara scoffed, “says the one with a degree in the subject.”

“I mean, yeah, I am. That’s besides the point,” Raye dismissed, picking up another dish to clean, “my point is, that I need to pick a new book to give him. It’s my turn to recommend something to him, and I can’t think of anything. Head empty, no thoughts.”

Tam rolled her eyes at her friend, “oh come on, suggest one of the classics. Tell him to read fuckin’ Hamlet.”

“No, Tam! Shakespeare is boring when you’re forced to read it. I need something that’ll impress him, something that he probably hasn’t already read,” she said with a frown. Tamara sighed dramatically, “dude, I don't know! I’m a faker, okay? I talk a big talk, and I own this cafe with the books and shit, but I haven't read like any of them. They bore me. I just like the whole academia aesthetic.”

Raye snorted a laugh, washing the final dish before drying off her hands, “I get it. I like it too. I guess I’ll just go to the library and see if any inspiration strikes me. It opens in a couple of hours.”

Tamara gave her friend a look, before glancing back down to her hands. She didn't want to make her concern for her friend so obvious, because she knew that her concerns would just be dismissed. But Tamara couldn't ignore the nagging feeling, that things just weren't right. “How are you doing? With everything?”

Raye inhaled sharply, “I’m fine. Don't talk about it.”

“I just think that maybe we should, G,” she said, before raising her hands in defence at the look she got, “sorry, I’m sorry, I keep forgetting.”

“Spencer heard you call me G that day we met. I told him it was a nickname for my middle name,” Raye mumbled, and Tamara raised a brow, “well, technically not a lie. Because it’s Giselle, right?”

“Right,” she nodded slowly, and Tamara sighed softly. The bags under her eyes were becoming more prominent every day, and they both knew it. Tamara pushed away the obvious concern, and took her attention back to their most urgent problem, “just recommend something you liked reading. That’s what he wants, right? To find out what you like, and read it?”

“I guess so, yeah,” Raye said softly, picking at her nails, “I just wanna impress him, I guess. I doubt he’ll enjoy Narnia as much as me.”

Tamara giggled, shaking her head, “you might be surprised. Doctor Reid is full of surprises, trust me.”

“Doctor?” Raye tilted her head, “i didn’t know he was a doctor.”

“Yeah, he’s got a handful of PHDs. I think one of ‘em is in math, can’t remember the rest,” Tamara said, as if it was the most casual thing in the world. Raye sat in silence, before shaking her head, “what can’t he do?”

“Probably cook. Or do laundry. With men, there’s always a downside, trust me. Glad I never have to get with another straight guys,” Tamara said, and Raye gave her a look, “you’re bi.”

“Yes, and? Doesn’t mean I’m gonna be running after any more fuckin’ straight dudes, no sir. Me and Ollie are very happy,” Tamara said, and Raye furrowed her brows, “I thought you guys were fighting.”

“We were. She found it odd that I suddenly had this friend from high school called Raye who I never mentioned before, and now spend so much time with.”

Raye felt guilt tug at her heart frowning, “I’m sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for, G- I mean, Raye. We kissed and made up. I think Ollie just got a little jealous that I had another woman in my life. You know I was always more friendly with the guys. I just never really had friends that were girls. And I never mentioned you, cause we went our separate ways after high school,” Tamara reasoned, hopping up to sit on the counter opposite where Raye stood. She just sighed, “I am sorry, though. I just barrelled into your life and now look at the consequences.”

“Shut up, you’re always welcome here. This is your home now. Where were you before this?” Tamara queried, watching as Raye sat on the counter opposite her. She took a deep breath, looking around the empty shop before answering, “California. LA, to be specific. I didn't really like it there. I liked Louisiana, everyone was so nice. Hated Florida. And Texas.”

“How many years has it been... since you’ve seen your mom?” Tamara asked cautiously, knowing it was a sore spot. But since she was slowly getting her to open up, she figured there was no harm in trying to ask. Raye flinched slightly, before murmuring, “it’s been six years.”

Tamara felt her heart hurt a little. She couldn't imagine a life without her parents, “I’m sorry. I can't imagine how hard it is. But you know, the way you're living... its not gonna be like this forever.”

Raye nodded in agreement, but deep down, they both knew that she might be wrong.

-

NEXT CHAPTER

a short, but important chapter ;)

comment and tell me what you guys think! I have so many ideas for this fic, so feedback is always appreciated!

also i was considering maybe making this a reader fic rather than an oc fic? again idk so comment or send asks if you want :)

taglist: @slutforthegubes @pinkdiamond1016 @itsmyblogandillreblogifiwantto @fallinallinmendes @beyonces-breastmilk @spencerlikesapplejuice @pastathighs @gcblers @hushfakebitches @ijustcomeheretoread @thelovelyrose @187-reid @madison-malfoy @averyhotchner @haylaansmi

[baby-impalas]

everything ever | jacob barber

pairing: jacob barber x reader

word count: 2806

warnings: swearing, angst, pining, unedited, probably some spelling errors, drinking, mentions of drugs.

-

normally, jacob would be a smiley mess watching you dance. you’re so carefree and in the moment when dancing he thinks it might be one of the only true releases you have. however, watching you dance up against your boyfriend (who isn’t him), doesn’t exactly bode the same. 

it breaks his heart, in fact. 

derek (or ‘little bitch’ as jacob refers to him in his mind and around sarah) has his hands on your waist and his mouth pressed against your neck. you’re swooning completely for whatever he’s whispering in your ear, smiling and giggling like you couldn’t be happier. 

until you look over and see jacob watching you, breaking out into a smile he swears could power the city. you immediately turn to derek and say something, giving him your drink to hold before running over to him and practically jumping into his arms for a hug. 

“haven’t seen you in forever,” you say into his ear. the music is loud, but he could pick your voice out of any crowd. 

“since friday. yesterday,” he chuckles, setting you down and smiling at you. your eyes are bright and so full of spirit. fuck he has it bad. 

“yeah but it always seems like a long time when I'm away from you,” you say, knocking his shoulder playfully with your fist. 

you have no idea, he thinks. 

about an hour later you guys are sitting on a couch, your head leaned against his shoulder with your nose in your phone as jacob observes the party scene in front of him. it’s some kid he doesn’t really know that threw the party for the fourth of july. everyone’s drunk off their ass and a few people are really feeling the holiday, chanting ‘u.s.a.’ a couple rooms over. in the corner, jacob spot a girl he knows to be named aubrey. she’s dancing with mike greyson, possibly the dumbest college freshman jacob’s ever met. he doesn’t even know how the kid got in, to be quite honest. jacob doesn’t understand why aubrey, who’s quite smart, would waste her time on someone like mike. same as he doesn’t understand why you would wast your time with someone like derek. 

jacob knows he isn’t exactly a catch. he’s decently attractive, but he does have a bit of an anger problem. it’s something he’s gotten better at controlling over the years, and something he would never even think about taking out on anyone. he knows now better than when he was younger that it’s his problem, and he has to deal with it on his own. death seemed better than even thinking about taking his anger on you, and that’s where he and derek differed, it seemed. 

derek definitely didn’t hit you (no way in hell would you stand for that), he’s just raised his voice at you one too many unnecessary times. you talked to jacob about what he said to you and how it made you feel. 

how he called you an ‘uptight bitch’ for not wanting to get high before class. 

he’s right I should loosen up a little, you’d said. 

how he called you stupid for asking a simple question about some homework. 

I really should pay attention more, you’d said. 

fuck that. you shouldn’t have to make excuses for your shitty boyfriend being an asshole to you just because he thinks he can. if jacob’s ever been confident in one thing about himself, it’s that he should be the one holding you in his arms and whispering sweet things in your ear. 

he glances down at you, seeing that you were texting derek. 

shithead. 

you: i wanna go

derek : i’m having fun tho

you: I'm tired

derek: you can go

you: derekkk

derek: what?

you: please?

derek: are u always gonna be so nagging?

“hey,” jacob says, nudging his shoulder. you look up to him and set your phone in your lap. “i'm gettin’ kinda tired. you wanna go?” 

you basically snort. “yes please,” you say. 

jacob stands and takes your hand in his to help you stand as well. you’re a bit wobbly and hold onto him for balance. and even in the sweaty crowd all jacob can smell is your sweet vanilla perfume. 

once outside, you say, “I don’t even know why I came. I hate these parties.” 

“me too.” 

“then why’d you come?” you ask with a bubbly laugh. 

“cause you did,” jacob answers truthfully. you pause for a moment, nearly making him trip. “you okay?” 

you’re watching him carefully, the same way he watches people when they’re doing something particularly interesting. 

“yeah,” you say a little late. “I have to tell you something.” 

jacob’s heart hammers in his chest, and he swears his legs go a little numb. but he plays it cool, asking, “what’s up?” 

you don’t respond right away, instead brushing his tousled hair away from his eyes. he remembers a couple weeks after you guys had met, you’d said he had some of the prettiest eyes you’d ever seen. and shit if that wasn’t fuel for his fire. 

“you’re so pretty, jake,” you say, seemingly just remembering that you thought that about him. “and so smart. god you are so smart and you don’t even have to try.” 

jacob feels his cheeks heat up and thanks anyone listening that it’s dark outside so you can’t see. he opts to look at some trees over your shoulder, knowing that staring into your twinkling eyes will only make it worse. but you place a hand on his cheek and turn his head back to you. 

being so close he swears he might pass out. 

“you’re everything to me,” you say. “you’re just everything there every was. do you know that?” 

he tilts his head slightly to the right as his eyebrows knit together.

“I don’t think you know what you’re saying,” he smiles a little and you smile right back, immediately falling into a fit of giggles. 

“I'm trying to be serious,” you say with a pout and shit you look so cute. he’d let you break his heart over and over and over if you wanted to. 

“be serious, then.” 

you take a deep breath for dramatic and comedic effect. 

“I, uh...” you’re staring into his eyes with a sudden intensity that nearly knocks him off his feat. he can practically see the gears turning in your head, though one seems to stop and suddenly that intensity is gone and you’re looking at the ground. “I'm tired.” 

maybe his heart aches just a little. 

“let’s get you home, then.” 

you don’t lean on him anymore, seemingly so balanced you may as well be sober. 

the drive home is mainly silent. the radio plays everybody wants to rule the world at a low volume, and you rest your head against he window the whole time. you really weren’t lying about being tired. 

when you arrive at your house, jacob helps you inside because it’s very hard for you to walk half asleep and intoxicated. he helps you into bed, removing your shoes and covering you up. then, because he can’t help himself, he brushes your messy hair back from your eyes, and suddenly you’re staring up at him in a way that has him panicking. because you’re looking at him the way sally looked at harry. 

“jake,” you say, your voice thick with sleep. 

“i’ll see you tomorrow, yn.” 

what’s one more impulsive romantic gesture? he kisses you on the head. 

“jake,” you say again. “want you to kiss me.” he almost doesn’t hear it, you’re so quiet. 

“what?” he murmurs, his heart picking up in his chest as he looks down at you. he’s still bent over, so when you sit up you’re only inches away from each other. 

“I want you to kiss me again,” your hand comes up from under the covers and you rest your index finger on your bottom lip. “here.”  

fuck. your cheeks are lit with a blush and your sparkling y/e/c eyes are boreing into his. you smell so good and he’s sure you taste like everything wonderful in the world. 

“no,” but you’re not his girlfriend. “you’re drunk.” you’re derek’s girlfriend. 

“doesn’t matter,” you say, grabbing his shirt and not breaking eye contact. 

“matters a lot,” he says, wishing he had the will power to remove your hand and just leave. but he doesn’t. because it’s you. you’re his first love and right now you’re looking at him like he carries the universe, the way he’s always wanted you to look at him. 

“not if I think about it sober, too,” you say. 

oh. 

“well-” what the fuck does he say? you still have a boyfriend, he can’t kiss you. he can’t kiss you. he can’t kiss you. your lips are alluring and your gaze is honest in love. but he can’t kiss you. 

he can’t. 

“please,” you say. and shit now you’re begging. “jacob, I need you to kiss me right now or I may explode.” 

fuck. he doesn’t know what to do, so he does the only logical thing. he shuts off his emotions. ever since he was a kid, jacob’s been very in charge of his feelings. he’s not sure it’s a good thing, but it’s a thing that comes in handy in moments like this. 

“get some sleep, yn,” he says, finally standing up and pulling himself out of the spell you seemed to have him in. 

he knew you were pouting without even looking at you, for you’d made a big huffy sort of sound that he knows you do when something doesn’t go your way. you make a noise like you’re about to speak, but nothing comes out. jacob smiles down at you, and you lay back down, looking very tired again. 

he walks out, making sure to turn your night light on and lock your front door. he seems okay. anyone looking at him would think he’s completely fine. but in the safety of his car, the switch for his emotions seems to turn back on, and he feels his breathing pick up like he might cry. but jacob doesn’t cry. he hasn’t since ben rifken. so he just sits and feels the anger begin to spread. 

why the fuck didn’t he kiss you? because you have a boyfriend. but he hates the son of a bitch and if you like him so much why would you try and kiss jacob? what’s the point of being a good guy if you always get hurt in the end? isn’t there a point where his own happiness should come first? 

jacob hits his steering wheel, so conflicted with what the right answer is he feels his head practically swimming like he might be drunk. he’s not drunk. he’s sober and in pain. but who wouldn’t be? you’re y/n y/l/n. you're a four leafed clover and probably the reason the earth orbits the sun. anyone who wouldn’t move mountains for you is a fucking idiot. 

jacob drives home and doesn’t think about anything anymore. sometimes thinking hurts too much. 

-

you text him the next morning and ask if you can come over. he says sure and makes breakfast for you guys. eggs, bacon, toast, the whole nine yards. he’s assuming you don’t remember what happened last night, but he’s sure you felt like shit this morning. 

you arrive and greet him with a smile and a hug. your hair’s pulled up into a bun and you’re wearing the sweater he gave you last year after a late night in the city. it used to be his own, but it looks so much cuter on you. 

“hey,” you say. “did you make breakfast? smells good.” 

he nods, ushering you into the kitchen where he’d already prepared two plates. you give him a sweet, adoring smile like you can’t believe what he’d done. 

“you’re so sweet,” you say, jutting your bottom lip out. 

everything seems to stop for a moment when he looks at you. it hits him then just how head over ass he is for you and how he’d do just about anything to make sure that gorgeous smile stays on your face forever. 

he shrugs, sitting down next to you. “just doin’ what my dad taught me.” 

andy was always drilling into jacob’s head that if you want to get a nice girl under your arm, chivalry is the key. 

“ah, yes, I'm sure andy barber was quite the catch in his day. still kind of is, actually.” 

jacob’s jaw drops. “you’re hitting on my dad? my married dad?”

you laugh, nearly choking on orange juice. “not hitting on, just complimenting the barber genes. obviously good looks run in the family,” you say, nudging his shoulder. 

jacob turns away so you won’t see him blush. he’s surprised things aren’t awkward between you two after last night. seems you really don’t remember what happened. 

“okay, but the y/l/n genes are clearly one of god’s favorites.” 

“aww, you think I'm pretty?” you say, turning to him after taking a bite of bacon and batting your eyelashes at him. 

“you’re ethereal,” he says, almost to himself, as he looks at you. 

suddenly the energy in the room shifts, and you’re not looking at him so playfully anymore. he tries to think of something to shrug it off, but nothing comes to mind. all he can think about is how pretty you are. and how kind, and loving. 

“why didn’t you kiss me last night?” you ask. 

fucking what?

“what? are you serious? you were drunk.” and I'm an idiot. 

“well I stand by what I said.” 

it’s silent as you watch him, waiting for a reaction. anyone looking at you might think you’re confident as hell right now, but really you’re practically begging inside that jacob doesn’t kick you out for crossing a line. 

“well you have a boyfriend,” he says almost spitefully. 

then you’re pulling out your phone and clicking some buttons, and jacob’s scared for a moment you may be deleting his number or something. but instead, you put the phone on speaker and begin calling someone. jacob doesn’t see who it is, only barely recognizes the voice of the little bitch on the other end of the line. 

“sup, babe?” derek says though the phone. 

“hey. i think we need to break up.” you’re picking at a loose strand of fabric on your jeans, seemingly not phased at all by the fact that you’re breaking up with your boyfriend. almost bored, even. 

“what? you’re serious?” 

“yup.” 

holy shit holy shit holy shit holy shit-

“how come?” 

then you lock eyes with jacob, and his heart skips a beat. 

“I'm in love with someone else.” 

derek starts to say something, but you hang up on him. jacob almost laughs at the cold gesture, but he can’t, because next thing he knows you’re pressing your lips against his and he can’t do anything except kiss back and think, this is happening. I'm kissing yn. and she tastes so sweet, like orange juice. 

his hands are slipping from your cheeks to your arms to your waist because he can finally touch you. he can fucking finally feel your soft skin under his fingertips, and your lips against his own. it feels right, like you fit together in a way that’s bigger than either of you.

you pull away and look at him, gauging his reaction. as far as jacob’s concerned, you’re the only one who’s ever really been able to read him. you know exactly how he’s feeling and how to react to it. it impresses him more than anything else because he considers himself extremely hard to read. 

right now, though, he’s not hard to read at all. his eyes are twinkling with adoration and there’s a blush on his cheeks that’s even spreading to his neck. he’s dopey and so in love he can’t contain it. 

“you’re everything there ever was,” he says, repeating your drunken words from last night. you giggle and just holy fuck he can’t believe you love him. you.

“jacob-”

“I love you,” he says, moving his hand to your thigh. “always have.” 

that has you blushing and avoiding his gaze, and you look so goddamn cute. 

“I love you too,” you say, trying your best to look him in the eye. “I never loved derek. I just didn’t think you’d want me like that, so I tried to move on... long story short it didn’t work.” 

he laughs, though he’s in major disbelief that he wasn’t obnoxiously obvious with his feelings for you. he’s good at controlling how he appears to people, but loving you was something he could never really contain. 

and now, thank fuck, he doesn’t have to anymore. because you’re all his. 

[hoodedwing]

Sleep, Red Bucket

Summary: Tim and Jason work together on a case. Just that, Jason had a hard week and maybe just 3-4 hours of sleep. 

Characters: Jason, Tim, Alfred (mentions), Avalanche (no, not from X-men. It’s an original enemy for a man named Snow here)

Warnings: Child drug rings, Drugs, Wild night terrors, Unconscious self-harm, Vomiting, Blood, Injuries, Swearing,

Additional Notes: I used way too much references from The Crown and this is a sickfic

Word Count: 2,233 words

***

Tim stretches a little from where he's sitting on the couch, running his hand through ebony locks as he tapped away on his laptop. He was secretly glad that he managed to sneak out of the Manor, after being ratted out by Jason for not sleeping. He had barely escaped after being coddled by Dick (that man in spandex sure can hug) and hovered over by Alfred. Sighing contently, he closed the webpage he was on and gave a quick glance at the clock.

It was still eleven, nearing towards twelve actually. He knit his eyebrows in slight annoyance, Red Hood and him had arranged to meet at twelve and he wasn't here yet. Tim assumed Jason probably had a run in with some bitch of a gang or seeing the  kids or whatever he does at Crime Alley. He had long learnt not to touch that area, last time saw him with a batarang held against his throat.

Ironic for someone proclaiming to hate Batman. Tim snorted.

He was well into his thought loop when he heard the sound of metal against his window. Tim's head shot up and he hastily grabbed his bo-staff laying on the couch opposite him. Silently, he crept towards the curtains and laid to wait. The sound grew louder and he heard irritated whispers or the wind, he couldn't exactly pinpoint.

The window opened and Tim nearly smashed the intruder's head from behind when he heard a panicked yell.

"The fuck?!"

Tim breathed a little before yelling back. Oh thank fuck, its Jason only.

"And you couldn't use the damn door like any other human?"

Jason allowed a snort to escape before walking resolutely  to the couch where he sat down rather heavily and let out a small sigh.

"I died, I'm technically not human or I mean does that count?"

Tim rolls his eyes and settles back on the couch where Jason was laying stretched rather lazily and flipping through the case files, with his hood still on.

"So, as far as I know. Snow has multiple bases in Bludhaven. Wonder how Dickface hasn't run into him yet."

"Dick knows him as Avalanche. That's what he calls himself. Different street names."

"He'll fall eventually."

Tim almost laughs but he cannot exactly tell if Jason was joking or just plaintively didn't give two fucks. It also sounded a tad more tired.

"Mhm. Anyways, his largest base is pretty near your territory. I think you know it like the back of your hand."

He offers tentatively, trying to rebalance the edge of tension in the room.

"Yeah. Got it."

"Do you need-"

"No. He's on my turf. I get to take him out."

Jason takes slightly longer than he does to get up.  Tim sees it but doesn't call him out on it. He really doesn't want another stab mark. he watches Jason climb out of the window.

"Oh and Jason?"

Jason turns, in zero mood right now because the small throbbing in his head has grown a little.

"What?!"

"Get some shut-eye."

He scoffs and leaves.

—

Some hours in, Tim decided he wanted coffee so he gets up to go make himself.

He hears a faint rustle and pin drop silence. He quietly grabs the dang bo-staff again. As he creeps along the rooms, he hears the sound getting louder. It sounded like someone was having trouble.

He almost shits himself when he sees Red Hood asleep. In his apartment.

Tim narrows his eyes and does a quick surveillance of Jason's things. He sees empty cartridges and shell casings lying at his feet

The only physical response was Jason's head tilting at an angle and soft snores filtered by the Hood.

Huh, he's back and asleep. Already?

"Jason?"

Tim raised an eyebrow at Jason.

"Mm?"

"Oh good. Just checking if you're alive."

Jason turned on himself, curling his legs under himself.

"Al'wys am, Replac'ment. F'k off. Lemme sleep."

Tim frowned slightly as he inched his hands towards the hood but a gloved hand comes out of nowhere and squeezes Tim's wrist tightly who now lets out a yelp.

-

Tim pours the coffee but the thoughts of Jason doesn't leave his mind. Something wasn't so right about Jason. But then, nothing was ever right with Jason.

Was he bleeding? He did return late from whatever he was up to. He did slur his dreaded nickname. He refused to take off his hood. Was he sick? Did he eat?

He hears a loud scream that interrupts his second thought loop of the night. Tim almost spills the coffee on himself and half stumbles-half runs to the source.

Jason.

"J..Jason?"

Erratic breathing greeted him. Tim steels himself as he nimbly types the correct combination and takes the hood off against Jason's order. He isn't about to let someone die in his apartment.

Why does everything have to end up so damn difficult?

Tim barely glances at Jason as he shakes him.

"Jason. Shh. Jason?"

Jason doesn't comply, the thrashing increases in intensity as he yells his throat raw. He claws his forearms, scratching the scarred skin in nightmare-delirium. He manages to draw blood which gently falls onto the white couch, turning the area into a crime scene wildly in contrast to the source of blood. His eyes were tightly shut, thick black lashes glued to his sweat covered cheeks

Tim restrains Jason, tries to grab his hands but he manages to fucking fling Tim across the table. He crashes at the bookshelf, wincing when his arm whacks against a particularly thick encyclopedia.

Ah, he thought, the pain of knowledge.

He quickly gathers himself and sees Jason thrashing on the couch, whimpering like a wounded animal.

"What the fuck. Jason? Can..can you hear me?"

The whimpers alternate into raw screaming, it leaves Tim's heart cold and skin prickled. He doesn't have to know what Jason is thinking. He needs to snap the nightmare loop before he decided his throat was next and he-

Focus, Tim.

Tim rummages everywhere in the apartment, heartbeat loud in his ears. He knows it was best to wait it out but it was almost like it was a loop. He spots a whistle, one from the Charity Games Bruce hosted. Yeah, he remembered that one pretty well. Grayson won the race and he blew the whistle right in his face. Jason laughed and Barbara poked fun at him later on it.

He quickly blows the whistle at Jason who shot up with a frightening velocity. Tim literally held Jason down, stunned into silence.

"Jason?"

He only pinched his nose-bridge, other hand clenching the couch tightly.

"Do you want water?"

"No"

He barely croaked, turning on himself like a wounded animal.

Tim fetches a glass anyway. He also brought some bandages to wrap his forearms. Quietly, he does so, rubbing alcohol into it alternated with small flinches. When the procedure was done, Tim stepped back a little.

Jason turned on himself again, shaking. His eyebrows were drawn in pain, breaths almost wheezing. His face was now alarmingly pale and eyebags almost like bruises cover below his tired eyes

Tim didn't know what to say to him. Jason might shoot down all chances to talk about it.

"I'm going to take your temperature, is that okay?"

No answer.

Tim awkwardly fumbles around, he needed distraction to come up with a way to talk about it. There was no way he was leaving Jason in that terrifying loop he saw.

He knew he had the latest state-of-the-art thermometer that took temperatures in seconds but he chose the mercury one to buy time he needed to calm himself. He returns back to Jason who sat up again, hand resting under his chin.

"I'm not sick."

A whisper barely above the rattling of the heater.

"I still need to check, I haven't ruled out fever dream. You look like shit."

"Course."

Jason lets Tim do it as he quietly counts to the 180th second. Tim removes it and sees it at 96.

"That's cold."

"Anemic."

"Oh, that wasn't in your files. I'll add that in later."

Jason lies down again and his eyes flutter closed. Tim properly gives Jason a onceover, he looked almost vulnerable underneath the glinting armor.

"You haven't eaten, have you?"

His eyes open slightly again, eyes squinting at Tim's undisguised worry.

"Won't stay down."

Tim bit his lip. This was bad.

"Can you handle some soup?"

"Try to, can't promise."

Tim gets up to reheat the soup Alfred left for him two nights ago but something in him nags to not leave Jason alone with his thoughts. He puts on The Crown and unpaused at where Queen Elizabeth hears about Jackie Kennedy's unflattering comments about her.

Tim quickly takes the soup out and shoves it in the microwave. His work could wait another day or two. He had checked the camera feeds momentarily and saw zero sign of the target.

The microwave beeped and he takes it out, carefully pouring into two bowls and bringing it to the living room where he now sees Elizabeth doing the foxtrot.

Tim places the soup at the table and gives one to Jason who cradles one in his arms, eyes unseeing at the television. Tim carefully watches Jason's face. His cheekbones had hollowed slightly and were clenched. Probably an aftereffect defense mechanism. Tim thinks.

"Do you feel like throwing up again?"

An imperceptible shake as his eyes glue at Philip yell at Charles while dangerously maneuvering the plane with tears streaking down Charles' face. Tim sees something momentarily shift in Jason at dad yelling at son.

Oh shit, trigger, trigger, trigger.

Tim abruptly switches off the television. This time, Jason properly turns at Tim.

"Why?"

Tim narrowed his eyes.

"Its..nothing, Jason. Not letting you go through that hell I saw."

"Funny you say that, been happening for two weeks straight."

Jason spits it with vitriol. Tim physically feels the force of the words. Biting, cold, hard. He moves back, as if the force displaced him. How the hell did Jason still have enough strength to do that? a half of Tim wondered.

He tried to open his mouth but settled to stretching his lips into a thin line.

"I said don't-"

"I'm not about to fucking ask or clarify anything remotely related to what just transpired. Listen to me carefully, all I want to know is whether you're sleeping enough. Yes or no?"

Tim hissed, chin dipping down with practiced ease. Jason seemingly curls onto himself more before grumbling, this time lacking the usual bite.

"Three in four days. Fuckers won't stop fucking recruiting kids on my territory to sell drugs. The hell am I supposed to do? Sleep while the kids get roped in a sick fuck of a game?"

Tim nods in understanding, clearly regretting his outburst. He watches Jason sag heavily against the couch and tip his head back. His eyes were pinched shut this time with his jaw tightening with more of the earlier tension Tim noted. He laid a hand on Jason's temple and carefully, he inched his hand throughout his head, warm fingers making their way through. He hears small sighs of relief when he reaches the sides. Tim slowly maneuvers Jason onto his lap and continues to stroke his sweaty bangs. Jason only winces again at the bright, florescent lights

"Headache?"

"Mhm."

He turns on himself, groaning quietly. he places an arm over his eyes. Tim continues to massage his temples, rubbing reassuring circles.

"How bad?"

"..."

"Want painkillers?"

Jason shakes his head, lights glaring in his eyes and everything spinning.

"Hate..meds. You know..that."

Tim seemed to consider that but got off the couch.

"Be right back, I'll dim the lights."

Jason almost whimpers again at the lack of heat of Tim's fingers as the dull throbbing increased and pounded behind his eyes. Jason wished he could will the damn thing to stop, if he could only sleep it away without the fucking nightmares. He curled on himself for the umpteenth time that night, wishing he was dead again.

He feels a dip in the couch and then firm fingers return, pressing hard. Jason gasped out.

"T..Tim."

"Sorry. Is this better?"

Tim apologetically whispers as he decreases the pressure against the wild throbbing. Jason silently hummed in agreement and leaned into the touches.

"Sorry, I overstayed.. I should go."

"You would, if you slept enough. How many hours did you get just yesterday alone?"

"Got here right after the run-in with Snow and be'fre was the druggists."

Tim narrowed his eyes while Jason closes his, worn out by the small conversation.

“What about you?”

He smiles a little at that, always caring about someone else before himself.

"Alfred made me sleep two nights ago at the Manor. I hid out here to find that intel."

"T'hts n'ce."

Tim places his hand on Jason's shoulder and watches as Jason's breathing evens out into soft snores. He threw on a blanket and quietly took his laptop to begin work, the soft blue glow illuminating the room.

“Tim?”

Jason sleepily opens one eye to where Tim settled down with his laptop. He motions Tim to join him who hesitates before lying down beside him. He presses a quick kiss on Jason’s forehead before adjusting himself under Jason’s neck. Jason only let a small hum of approval before encircling Tim with a soft hug.

“G’night.”

[indigosandviolets]

I love love love your writing so much! Your headcanons for the basterds have brought me so much joy!! Could you do a fight and makeup headcanon for the basterds? Thank you!!

angst! oh, lord, give me the strength for the angst. some of these are after the war, others are during, and one is before. some of these aren’t really angsts, and i KNOW that’s what y’all want, i just :/, y’know?

Aldo Raine

you guys have had little arguments over stupid shit like as follows

“Where’s my knife?”

“What?”

“Where the hell is my knife?”

“Where it always is. Cupboard over the fridge.”

“Why?”

“So that way the kids can’t get to it?”

“Oh. Right. Sorry.”

“Why the hell do you need your knife?”

“...”

“Aldo—“

but your first really fight fight was over something your mother said and it quickly escalated from her just nagging to a fully-blown shouting contest between the three of you

she didn’t like that Aldo was in charge of a band of blood thirsty Nazi killers and she especially didn’t like that fact that he had you kill 100 fucking Nazis

he was pissed that she assumed Nazis weren’t as bad as they were, which your Basterd ass agreed with 1000%

but slamming his knife (eating, don’t worry) into the fucking table over it? that’s where you got mad at him

“Aldo! What the fuck are you doing?”

“Making a point, damnit.”

“Not in my fucking house.”

yeah, he slept on the couch that night and didn’t drive with you while you took your mother home

but you came back to a new kitchen table that he made with your kids

now with 100% less stab marks!

Donny Donowitz

you and Donny don’t really fight

but then there’s fucking monopoly

you two are incredibly competitive. like shouting at each other and pulling out the rules when something seems fishy competitive.

so yes. you two are childish as fuck because you fight over a fucking board game. there, i said it.

it gets scary when you move past the shouting stage and into the calm furious

“Donny, I swear to the great lord above, if you take the last house I will take the broom and beat your head open with it you absolute tampon shitter.”

“Okay, what did I do?”

“You bought Boardwalk you son of a bitch.”

if you thought he was intense, you’re underestimating yourself

“Y/N, jesus, I’m sorry. Holy hell. Do you wanna take a break for a minute?”

“...yeah.”

he went and got you some tea to help you calm down while you negotiated a “business trade”

“Alright, so I give you Boardwalk, and in return you give me a railroad and the Electric Company?”

“Yeah, alright. That works.”

“And a kiss?”

“You’re pushing it, Mr. Donowitz.”

“I know, Mrs. Donowitz.”

Hugo Stiglitz

you and Hugo have only fought over one thing and that was when a German officer looked at you the wrong way during an interrogation and instead of fucking dealing with the problem, Hugo put a bullet through his fucking head

it was so fast that you hadn’t even noticed the way he had looked at you before his brains were all over the back of a tree in the middle of a French forest

“Stiglitz, what the hell was that? What the fuck was that?”

“That look.”

“What look? What the fuck is that matter with you?”

“On his face. It didn’t sit right with me. How am I in the wrong?”

“Because he had the look for two seconds before you popped a cap right between his fucking eyes, that’s why!”

“I was protecting you!”

“There was no imminent danger, Hugo! His hands were tied behind his back for fuck’s sake!”

“If anyone saw the way he looked at you, everyone would treat you like schissen, Y/N.”

“And why the fuck do you care so much about the way someone treats me?”

“Because I love you, damnit!”

“...what?”

“Ich liebe dich, Y/N.”

“...Ich liebe dich auch, you German bastard.”

Wilhelm Wicki

you two fought over you going to war with him

Wicki got drafted after a few years of you two dating and you were very much in love with each other and you were not about to let him go off to war without you

but he also didn’t want you going to war either

your thing was political science, not military fucking strategy

“Wicki, I just don’t see why I can’t go with you. I’m not gonna let you die out their alone with people you don’t know!”

“I have to go, you don’t.”

“Wilhelm Wicki, I do. What the hell am I supposed to do here? Sit and wait for a letter telling me whether or alive or not while I just buy war bonds and pray to God that it fucking helps?”

“You sit here away from the line of fire because I don’t want you fucking killed, Y/N!”

You look at him for a few seconds before saying what you have to say.

“Look, Wilhelm, I get your concern, but if you die, then I have no idea what the hell I’m going to do. If I go with you, then I’m giving myself a purpose, and if you die you’ll die with someone you love, someone you know inside and out. If I don’t and you die, then you’re dying alone and I don’t think I could live with myself if that happened.”

Wicki just looks at you for a few seconds before sighing, pinching the bridge of his nose, and then looking back and nodding. “Okay.”

“I love you.”

“I love you, so much.”

Smithson Utivich

Uti and you got into a fight over the military and it was interesting

so, here’s the thing: Uti was drafted. you enlisted. and you were debating on become career

you were currently a Sergeant and had a little bit of college experience, and with a recommendation from your commanding officer in the OSS you could’ve easily become an officer

thing is, if you were to stay in the military, Uti couldn’t go with you and he was not about that

“I don’t understand, Y/N. We did our fight. We fought for the people no one wanted to fight for, we did our part.”

“Smitty, we both know damn well I won’t have the same respect unless I stay in.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Where the hell else am I supposed to work?”

“We live in Manhattan, there’s plenty of work!”

“For you! What about for me, huh? Am I supposed to just bus and wait tables or be a secretary while you get to have an actual job and get your wartime respect?”

eventually you both calm down and decide to start searching for a job together in the newspapers where you would both get the same pay (he tried finding on where you would get more)

you guys hate fighting so coming out of it with something that benefits you both? best thing to make out of the situation

Gerold Hirschberg

you and Hirschberg fought during the birth of your daughter Sarah

you know, the standard couple’s fight

“Gerry! I’m going to fucking kill you! I am going to fucking kill you!”

“Okay, okay.”

“You did this shit! I would’ve been fine, but this is shit is on you!”

“I understand.”

“You’re gonna die. You’re gonna fucking die. “

“At least I get to fuck while I die.”

the look you gave this man. the nurse had never seen so much “are you shitting me right now” in one look

“Get the out.”

“Y/N-“

“Get the fuck out.”

“I’m sorry—“

“I said get the fuck—“

“I know what you said, and I’m sorry, but we both know that I need to be here to see the birth of our child, right?”

“...fine.”

you named your daughter Sarah and when her first word was “Damn!” you were not surprised whatsoever

Omar Ulmer

you and Omar got into a fight after Operation Kino because of the sheer bullshit around everything

he admitted his love to you right before Operation Kino, after TWO YEARS of him harboring feelings, so you were kinda pissed because you had been into him for a long time and he didn’t say shit until the night he would probably DIE

he didn’t, so you did have the opportunity to argue with him

“Are you kidding me? Omar, I love you, but what the hell is the matter with you?”

“I thought I was going to die, I knew I had to say something!”

“And I’m glad you did, but you had two years, Omar! We could have died at any time during that. We were literally at war.”

“And I didn’t want to distract you from the war!”

“I was already distracted by you! Wondering whether or not I had a shot with the one guy in this entire group who wasn’t a complete asshole or smartass.”

“Y/N—“

“No, Omar, what the fuck. You don’t wait until you’re about to die to tell someone you love them.”

After a little while, you two just hold each other and cry together (shut up, he can cry. fuck you) and make up and decide where you want to live after the war. very sweet, i must say

[myheroheacanons]

Wish You Were Sober

Overview: Kaminari drags you out to a party. You of course have a huge crush on him. Sad part, he can only admit his feelings for you when he drunk. 

Pairing: Denki Kaminari x gn!reader

Word Count: 1,126 words

Warnings: Underage drinking, mentions of smoking, angst

Author’s Note: I wrote this because I absolutely love Conan Gray, like so much. Listen to Kid Krow, now. It came out on my birthday which made it so much better :) . Anyways, I thought this would sting a little, so enjoy! Love you all! 

“Please y/n!” Kaminari whined, throwing his hands over you. He’s been nagging you about this party for what seemed like a decade. In reality, it’s only been a week. 

“Why do you want me to come anyway?” you question, letting out a tired sigh. 

“Because, you need to get out more! Plus, you’re my best friend, why wouldn’t I want you to come” he declared giving you a smile. To any average person, they would be happy to hear that. But to you, those words stung. You’ve been in love with Denki Kaminari since freshman year. The moment you met him. Now you guys were graduating in a couple months. And never once have you confessed your feelings. But you knew he didn’t feel like that about you. He asked out any girl he thought was attractive.You apparently, were not on that list. But you knew how he got at parties. You’ve been to one with him on multiple occasions. And when he got drunk, he was even flirtier. Towards you especially. That is maybe what made you hate parties so much. Maybe the fact that he only loved you when he was so drunk he was about to black out. Still, one look into his beautiful eyes made you weak, and you gave in. 

“Fine” you said letting out another sigh. 

“Yay!” Kaminari cheered, turning you around and pulling you into a warm hug. 

This party's shit, wish we could dip. Go anywhere but here. Don't take a hit, don't kiss my lips. And please don't drink more beer.

You knew this was going to happen. You hated this party, so much. All you wanted to do was run out and go home. Kaminari was greeting some of his other friends. You just awkwardly stood near him, giving his friends a smile. 

Moving from group to group, Kaminari chatted their ears off. He was always such a social butterfly. Finally, you saw some familiar faces. You waved to Sero and Mina. You and Kaminari made your way over to them. 

“How are you enjoying the party?” asked Sero. “It’s nice” you say, giving an awkward smile. 

“Awww y/n, lighten up!” Mina put an arm around your shoulder, laughing. You saw from the corner of your eye Kaminari down another cup of beer. Everyone was laughing and enjoying themselves. It felt like you were the only one feeling miserable. 

I'ma crawl out the window now .'Cause I don't like anyone around. Kinda hope you're followin' me out. But this is definitely not my crowd.

After you and Kaminari got away from Sero and Mina, you asked him to take a break on the couch. 

“Anything for my lovely y/n!” He said, putting an arm over your shoulder and leading you to the couch. That statement made you blush, but he was drunk so you didn’t pay attention too much. You finally found some rest after walking around for hours. You looked over at Kaminari, who was staring at you. You closed your eyes for a moment, looking down. 

“I’m leaving” you stated as you got up. 

“Wait what?” Kaminari stood up with you and tried to stop you. 

“I don’t like anyone here, I’m leaving” you repeat yourself. Kaminari followed you as you made your way to the front door. You felt the cool air hit your body. It was March after all, so it wasn’t completely warm yet. 

“What’s wrong y/n?” Kaminari questioned, resting a hand on your shoulder. 

Nineteen, but you act twenty-five now. Knees weak, but you talk pretty fly, wow. Ripped jeans and a cup that you just downed. Take me where the music ain't too loud

“You’re only 17 but you act like you’re so grown up…” you say bitterly. What’s wrong with you? It’s almost like all the built up frustration over the years was coming out and spewing out of you. 

“You’re drunk, yet you still manage to flirt with me and keep breaking my heart” you say now on the verge of tears. You start making your way down the path of the huge house, in which someone’s son was throwing a huge party in. 

“Wait, y/n!” Kaminari yelled and ran after you. 

“Cmon, don’t go! You know I never meant to hurt you! And I actually thought I was pretty immature for my age.” he said, voice getting quieter towards the end of the sentence. 

Trade drinks, but you don't even know her. Save me 'til the party is over. Kiss me in the seat of your Rover. Real sweet, but I wish you were sober.

You stood in the middle of the lawn. You didn’t know what to say. “Just take me home. Please Denki” you said not making eye contact. He opened his mouth to say something. But then closed it again. 

“Okay” is all he said, as he made his way to the car. He had a sad expression on his face as he fiddled with the keys. You got into the passenger seat of the car and looked out the window. Your head was throbbing and you just wanted to cry. 

“Y/n…” Kaminari almost whispered. You finally gathered the courage to look him in the eyes. Yes, those eyes. They were always your weakness. His eyes, they were always so kind. It’s like he never had a single bit of malice in his body. 

“Yes, Denki?” you asked. And then you saw it. He was leaning in. His pink soft lips were inches away from yours. He put his hand on your cheek and smiled. 

“Can I kiss you?” he asked. Before you had time to think this through, you nodded and he closed the distance between you and him. You’ve imagined this kiss probably about a hundred times. But the real thing was better than you have ever imagined. You let yourself indulge in this dream for just a little more. Because you know this would never happen again. You know that he is only doing this because he’s drunk. But you continued to kiss him. When you finally broke apart, he gave you another smile. You wanted to return it. But you didn’t. 

“That was great Denki, but I’m not stupid.” you said letting go of him. His eyes widened and he had a questioning look on his face.

“Huh?” he said trying to take your hand but you pulled away. 

“I can’t be with someone that can only love me when they’re drunk” you said turning around. 

“Y/n…” he said. Sadness was laced with his voice. 

“Take me home.” you said, continuing to look out the window. 

“You know I meant that, right?” he tried to reassure you. 

“Real sweet, but I wish you were sober” 

[eddiemunsonssoulmate]

At the end of the day I’ll walk with the heart of a lion

Summary: JJ Maybank is about as local as they come. Latest in a long line of fishing, drinking, smuggling, vendetta-holding salt-lifers who made their living off the water. Best surfer around and mild kleptomanic, probably also a future tax cheat.But what made him into the young man he is now?

Word Count: 10.320

Warnings: Domestic abuse, child abuse, drugs, alcohol, violence, angst

A/N: Okay so this one...well. It's kinda taken a life on it's own. It was supposed to be just a small OneShot about JJ's early home life, a few headcanons thrown in here and there about his mother, how his father became so shitty. Things like that. Now you've 10k for JJ's background how I imagine it. It starts with his pre-school life and goes up until the vanishing of Big John, so around a year before the show starts. I hope you enjoy!

Available On: AO3

There was a time, I used to look into my father's eyes In a happy home, I was a king I had a golden throne

“Mom, look”, the blonde boy said and came running into the house, holding a dead fish as high up in the air as he could. “I caught it all on my own!”

His mom turned around and smiled at the boy literally glowing with excitement, patting his head. “Good job, JJ”, she said and crouched down in front of him to place a kiss on his cheek. 

“This is going to be a feast!”, his father exclaimed as he came up behind his son, carrying a box with fish and ice inside.

It had been the first time that his dad has taken him fishing and JJ loved every second of it. It was pretty exciting for a six year old after all. He had been nagging his father about this for weeks and today was the day he had finally agreed. 

JJ had literally jumped out of bed this morning, way earlier than usual, only to crawl into the bed of his parents to wake them up with excitement in his voice. 

“Mom, mom, can I help?”, he said and climbed up on the counter where his dad had placed the fish, looking inside the box.

“Are you sure you can handle such a big knife?”, his mother asked and showed him the knife she was going to use.

“I’m a big boy!” He pouted a little at his mother, he could fish so he could totally prepare dinner with it.

It took a little longer than usual but dinner was ready soon enough and he felt like he was the happiest kid on earth right now. He liked the outdoors things with his father but also really liked helping his mother around the house. Cooking, baking, cleaning, it didn’t matter to him as long as he could spend time with her.

“Can we go again soon?”, JJ asked his father, his mouth still full of food and it made his dad laugh.

“Sure we can, buddy. But first we have to fix your tree house okay?” His father smiled at the young child in front of him and JJ nodded. 

They had built a treehouse together a few months ago but the last storm hadn’t been kind to it, so it needed some fixing. It was JJ’s favourite place to be when he wanted to be alone, sometimes he would even sleep there when it was warm outside. He had a pretty good view over the property and felt like a king in his home.

The boy grinned and kept eating as fast as he could as his favourite cartoon was about to start soon and missing even a second of it was not an option.

Later on he was snuggled between his parents on the couch, wrapped in a blanket, watching TV. A particular scene involved the protagonist going to school and JJ clapped his hands.

“I’m so excited for school!”, he said and snuggled closer to his mother who slowly stroked his blonde hair that he had clearly gotten from her.

After this summer the first year of school would start for the small boy and he had been talking about it for quite some time. It was probably normal for kids that age to be excited about going to school but JJ had always been so full of energy that he seemed even more excited.

“Bedtime story?”, he yawned when his show was over and his dad was carrying him to his bed. 

“You know I’m not good at telling stories”, his father answered and JJ just chuckled against his neck.

“You always say that and you still tell me stories afterwards.” It had become their routine ever since JJ had asked for the first story years back and his father would always try to deny it.

Of course he got another story and, as usual, he fell asleep during that. His father gave him a kiss to his forehead before leaving the room. It might have been a small room but big enough for a kid his age, decorated with love by his parents.

 When everything you do Don’t seem to matter You try but it’s no use Your world is getting blacker

 School certainly hadn't been what he had expected. Actually, he hated it most of the time. He wanted to go fishing with his father, spend time with his mother, learn how to surf even though the waves would swallow him. Sitting in a cramped classroom together with other kids he didn’t get along with wasn’t his favourite activity. The learning was fun, sometimes but everything else was a nightmare for the active kid that prefered to run around instead of sitting still.

“I don’t want to go there anymore”, he said one day as he came home, throwing his backpack into a corner and falling face down onto the couch. It’s only been a few months but he was already done with it, already trying to think of a job he could get at his age already but coming up blank.

“Why’s that, sweety?”, his mother asked and walked over to him to pat his head gently.

“The other kids are mean!”, he said as he sat up, pouting at his mother. “They make fun of me because I can’t read as well as the others!”

“Oh, you’ll learn soon enough. School only just started, it just takes a while.” His mother kissed him on his forehead and sat down next to him but JJ didn’t want to hear it. His parents had always told him he was a really smart boy but right now he felt really stupid.

“But they laugh about me because I’m the only one!” He didn’t understand why it was only him that had trouble with letters and words.

His mother pulled him on her lap and into a hug. “Some are faster, some are slower. That’s okay.”

“Am I dumb?”, he suddenly asked and his mother laughed softly, shaking her head. The other kids had been calling him dumb quite often and it didn’t seem to stop, no matter how many times his teacher scolded them.

“No, you’re one of the smartest boys I know”, she said and he pulled away, grinning from ear to ear at her, a small twinkle in his eyes. If mom said that, that had to be true, right? Mom was the best, after all. The kids wouldn’t be smarter than his mother.

“Can we make a cake?” He really loved baking with his mother.  He himself wasn’t very good at it but his mother was very skilled at baking all kinds of goods.

His mother agreed and they went on to the kitchen. “But don’t eat all the batter before we actually make the cake!”

JJ just giggled and nodded. 

He would do it anyway.

It would only take a couple of more weeks until the young boy decided to do something against the bullying he had to endure.

“JJ, what happened?”, his mother asked as she came into the office of the principal with quick steps. They had called her and she had come as fast as she could, worried about her little boy. He just sat there on the chair that was way too big for him, swinging his feet back and forth.

“Nothing”, he mumbled and didn’t look at her, too ashamed of himself.

“Mrs. Maybank, good that you’re here”, the principal said and got up to shake her hand briefly, signing her to take a seat next to JJ’s before sitting again. “Your son broke another student’s nose today.”

“You what?”, she asked and put a hand over her mouth in shock while looking at the normally so innocent boy next to her. “Why would you do something like that?”

“He kept teasing me because I can’t read well and because I’m smaller than the others! And dad said I should stand up for myself and not take any of their shit!”, he said loudly, angry that no one seemed to understand his situation.

“JJ! Language!”, his mother rebuked him and he pouted even more. “I’m so sorry that happened, is the other child okay?”

“He will be but this is unacceptable behavior. If this keeps happening we have to suspend or even expel your son”, the principal explained and JJ’s mother ran a hand through her hair, not sure how to handle all of this.

“Yes of course. I’ll make sure it won’t happen again.” She nodded in agreement.

The principal asked JJ to leave the room for a moment and wait outside. After the boy left he leaned over on his desk, closer to the woman in front of him. 

“There’s also a thing the teacher had noticed. Your son might be dyslexic. That’s probably the reason why he gets in trouble with other students. We would like to test this with him, can we make an appointment soon? If it’s confirmed he can get the support he needs to catch up.”

The blonde woman agreed and soon enough it was proven that JJ was in fact a dyslexic. They finally had an answer why he had troubles reading and writing but the bullying still didn’t stop and JJ wasn’t one to just keep taking it without a fight back.

Following weeks were full of talks with teachers and the principal as JJ was acting out even more. He didn’t hurt them bad and only defended himself when he got bullied again but he had always been the one to get in trouble the most.

Therapy was even in the talks and also extra lessons for kids who were struggling. One of many things that JJ started to hate about school. He really liked math, biology and sports but staying in school longer only because he couldn’t read so well? Ridiculous. He tried to sneak so often that his teachers had to accompany him to the extra classes.

His mom was slowly getting all over her head with him and his father...well. He was at home all the time currently after losing his job but didn’t seem to care about his family too much right now. He was dwelling in self pity and prefered to drink away his pain.

The first time JJ had come home from school and saw his father passed out on the couch he thought that he was dead, freaking out but only waking him up with it, earning a scolding for that. His dad had gotten quite loud and that was totally new for the young boy.

It wouldn’t be the last time he would find his father like that, he only didn’t say anything about it anymore, simply accepting the fact that his dad seemed to be tired a lot.

“Mom?”, he asked as she was tugging him in one day. 

“Why is dad like that? He is drinking so much and sleeps a lot. Is he tired because he’s trying so hard to get a job?” He still didn’t know why he needed the alcohol for that but as his parents always had told him, alcohol is for grown ups and he shouldn’t care about it too much.

His mother sighed and tears were building up in her eyes while she shook her head. “He will be fine, I’m sure he’s trying really hard to find one in the mornings when you’re at school. And then he is so exhausted he needs to sleep.”

“But why the beer? It smells and tastes horribly”, he answered and pouted, his eyes full of wonder because he couldn’t grasp the concept of it. For him, any kind of alcohol smelled bad and every time his father let him try a tiny sip it was disgusting.

“Sleep now”, his mother simply replied and pressed her forehead against his for a second before turning the light off and leaving the room.

His father hadn’t tugged him in in weeks.

No one had told him bedtime stories ever since.

 I hear her scream from down the hall Amazing she can even talk at all She cries to me go back to bed

 It was at the end of the next summer that his father came home with a huge grin on his face.

“Honey, I bring good news!” The older man came into the house while his mother and JJ were baking cookies, enjoying the time together while his father was out of the house for once.

“Oh?”, she simply said and cleaned her hands to turn to her husband, JJ sitting on the desk and sneakingly putting his finger in the batter. He really had a sweet tooth.

“I found a new job at the docks!”, he said and pulled her into a hug, swirling in a circle. The little boy grinned at his parents finally looking happy again.

“That’s wonderful”, his mother said and pressed a kiss to his lips.

JJ didn’t really listen to his parents talk about boring jobs, the only thing he hoped was that his father would stop with the beer and tell him bedtime stories again.

“Would you please leave some of the batter in there?”, his mother said as she came back to him and he already had another finger of it in his mouth, grinning sheepishly at her.

When the cookies were done he went over to his father in the living room, giving him a huge plate of cookies. “For you! To celebrate the new job!”, he said and smiled at his father which caused the older man to ruffle his hair.

“Such a good boy”, he said and took one of the cookies that were still warm and JJ looked behind to his mother, beaming with pride at her but she didn’t seem to look. He tilted his head while watching her for a moment how she just stared off in the distance.

She was probably happy on the inside, that’s what he had hoped.

He would soon enough find out that he was wrong about that.

JJ returned home after a long day of school and extra courses a few months later, he was exhausted and annoyed. He was improving but only really slowly and it was annoying him that the other kids seemed so much smarter than him. He didn’t really understand that it wasn’t his fault.

Even before he opened the door he could hear yelling inside the house. The voices of his parents were clashing and he bit his bottom lip, hand still at the doorknob. They seemed really angry and he wasn’t sure if he wanted to go inside right now. 

When he was about to turn around and go to the treehouse instead, the door opened and his father was standing in front of him, eyes filled with anger and he was breathing heavily. He didn’t say a word, just slightly shoved the boy aside before getting to his car and driving off.

JJ watched him leave before going inside, dropping his bag immediately after seeing his mother sitting on the floor.

“Mom!”, he said and ran over to her, crouching down besides her. “Are you okay?”

Her eyes were filled with tears and she seemed hurt but she just nodded. “I’m fine, sweety”, she sand and pulled him into a hug, sobbing slightly against his shoulder. He wrapped his little arms around her and didn’t say a word.

“Where did dad go?”, he asked after a long moment and his mother shook her head.

“I don’t know. Probably to work, you know he has to work really weird hours.”

The boy nodded and grabbed his mother's hand, trying to pull her up on her feet. She smiled at him with sad eyes and got up, dusting off her clothes before going to the kitchen. It looked like she was walking a little weird.

“What were you fighting about?”, JJ asked with curiosity and her mother shook her head at him once more.

“Not now, JJ. Go to your room and make homework okay?”

His face dropped and he pouted before he went to get his backpack. He hated when they had secrets from him and for some reason he felt like there was a lot that he didn’t know.

Instead of doing his homework he looked out of the window, waiting for his father to come home but it was in vain. He was also pretty sure he could hear his mom crying and he really wanted to go and hug her but she didn’t seem to want him there right now.

Three days would pass before his father returned home, drunk and with a lot of money in his hands.

The little boy had no idea that his father’s new job involved smuggling and his mother had found out.

He hadn’t seen the first time his mother got hit by her own husband.

He would hear a lot of crying from the bedroom the following weeks.

 Hey mom, hey dad When did this end? Where did you lose your happiness?

 Second grade was almost over and things had changed at home. He couldn’t put a finger on it when exactly it had happened but he could feel that there was a lot of sadness in his mother and a lot of anger in his father.

He sat outside on his swing that was right under the treehouse, his parents were inside, having a grown up talk he wasn’t allowed to listen to even though he was dying out of curiosity. At first he thought about sneaking to the kitchen window that was open so maybe he could listen to them but then he was sure they were probably fighting again and he didn’t want to know that.

They had to love each other, that’s what parents did, right?

His mother didn’t smile anymore, not even when he came home with good grades or when he baked her cookies. Nothing made her smile. She tried to fake it but he could see that her eyes were still sad no matter how much she smiled.

His father on the other hand was away quite often but whenever he came home he barely talked to his mother. JJ didn’t know why and when he asked, they always said it was fine when it was clearly not fine.

No one had watched his cartoon with him for a while now and he never got to hear those bedtime stories from his father again, not even with the new job as he had hoped. Instead of this, he had to go to bed alone because his mother would lock herself into the bedroom in the evening and his father was either out at work or at home drinking. JJ didn’t like that.

“Don’t you dare to leave!”, Luke suddenly yelled angrily and JJ looked up, watching how his mother left the house with quick steps, hurrying over to the car almost as if she tried to run away.

His father caught up to her fast and grabbed her arm, pulling her back to him quite forcefully.

“Let go of me!”, she yelled right back at him and hit his arm multiple times but it was in vain. The grip was strong and there was no chance of getting away now.

JJ stopped the swing and got off it, walking over to his parents and looking at them with big eyes. They were fighting again. It seemed bad. He didn’t want it to be bad, why was this happening?

“Dad?”, he asked as he stopped next to them with a little distance. There was something about his father that scared him so he didn’t dare to go closer. “I think mom wants to go.” His voice was quiet, almost like a whisper but it was loud enough for his parents to notice and look over to him. It was an obvious fact that he was starting but for him, it seemed important to tell his father at this moment.

“None of your fucking business, kid.” The tone was harsh and it shocked JJ, his father had never talked to him in such a way. He took a step back and his bottom lip started to wobble a little. His dad had been barely angry at him and even then, it was just a mild scolding. This time, it felt like a vocal hit to the face.

“Luke!”, his mother hissed and he turned back to her, glaring into her eyes.

“What? Tell your worthless son to use his brain something in school instead of annoying grown ups! Maybe then we will get a little bit of peace and not worry about him anymore”, he growled and didn’t look at JJ again before letting go of the woman, walking inside with heavy steps, slamming the door shut behind him.

JJ just blinked at what happened, tears dwelling in his eyes when he looked at his mother. Her face fell and within a moment she was kneeling in front of him, holding his face in her hands.

“Oh sweetheart, he didn’t mean it like that. He is just really stressed from work”, she tried to explain and pulled him into a hug where the boy started to sob. Why would his father call him something like that? He normally only called small fish they didn’t need worthless. He didn’t want to be like that.

He had no idea what was going on but he didn’t like it. The fighting, the sadness, the anger, the yelling, all of it. Was it his fault?

“I don’t like his new job”, he sniffled against her shoulder and she nodded in agreement.

“Don’t tell anyone, okay? Nothing good would happen then. Promise me?”; she asked with a gentle voice as she was brushing a strand of hair out of his face and he bit his bottom lip and nodded.

JJ had no idea that the coming week would be even worse than what he had just experienced.

His mom was away a lot, would leave when he was at school and come back in the late afternoon which almost always caused a fight with his father when he was at home. It was a constant yelling of ‘Where have you been?’ and ‘Who did you visit?’ like his mother wasn’t allowed to even leave the house.

He spent an awful lot of time in the treehouse as soon as it got worse. Home didn’t feel safe anymore with all the yelling and his parents not even paying attention to him anymore. There was no fishing, no baking, no bedtime stories. He sometimes felt like a stranger in his own house.

During another warm night he had decided to sleep in the treehouse so he wouldn’t need to see his father drunk on the couch or hear his mother's cries from the bedroom. At some point he got thirsty and the sun was already gone so he figured it would be safe to go inside. 

He came in from the side, tip-toeing into the kitchen to get himself a glass of water which he gulped down pretty quickly, filling up another to take it with him into the treehouse. They didn’t have water bottles anymore, the only bottles in the house were beer bottles.

JJ was almost out of the house again when he heard the sound of something breaking and his mother’s voice screaming out in pain. He blinked and walked over to the bathroom where the door stood open enough to see what was happening.

His father was towering over his mother as she was leaning against the dresser, a lamp and a few books on the ground.

The glass of water dropped to the ground and shattered into pieces as the young boy saw how his father’s fist connected with his mother’s face. It took him only a second to sprint over and jump on his father’s back.

“Dad, stop!”, he yelled and was already in tears. His appearance shocked both of his parents and made them freeze in place, especially his father.

It was long enough for his mother to slip out of him.

“I’m done with you!”, she spat at him and grabbed an already packed bag before getting out of the house.

JJ slowly let go of his father and dropped to the ground, looking up at his father with eyes full of terror.

“See what you have done!”, Luke yelled and went to run after his wife.

The young boy on the ground just looked after his father as the tears continued to roll down his face. 

Was it his fault his mother had left?

That’s at least what his father kept telling him in his drunken rage the following weeks because his mother did not return home. 

She never came back again and he started to blame himself too.

 Because of you I'm ashamed of my life Because it's empty Because of you I am afraid

 Life had been a nightmare ever since his mother had left them. He never even heard from her again. That was one of the many reasons why the boy thought that it was his fault. If it wouldn’t be, she would at least write him a letter or call, right? But she didn’t, not even for his birthday.

No one in school wished him a happy birthday because no one knew, not even the teachers. Or they didn’t care so he didn’t care much either as he just wanted to get home and into his treehouse to hide from the world.

As he came home he checked the mailbox but there was nothing. He had prayed every night that his mother would send him a birthday card but it was as empty as his stomach.

He gulped when he walked into the house only to find his father snoring on the couch, surrounded by beer bottles that hadn’t been there this morning. A sad sigh left his mouth when he was looking around. No birthday decoration, no cake on the table with candles to blow out, no gifts.

His father probably didn’t even know it was his birthday. How could his lovely father turn into that angry man in front of him was beyond the young boy. It hurt so much. He had never felt so lonely in his life.

When he went over to the fridge his stomach made some loud noises and he held it with his left hand, rubbing it a bit. He didn’t have any lunch money for school so that hadn’t been an option. Sadly, the fridge didn’t seem to be an option either as it was only filled with a couple of beer bottles.

JJ bit his bottom lip and looked over to his father. He had to ask him as he didn’t have any money to buy something.

His legs were a little shaky while he was walking over to his father, the last time he had woken him up during one of his drunken naps it ended in lots of yelling and throwing things around.

“Dad?”, he said very silently and shook his father’s shoulder slightly but the older man didn’t even move. “Dad”, he tried again this time louder and Luke finally moved a little, grumbling something under his breath. “Dad!” This time his voice was actually loud enough for his father to stir.

It took only a moment for the older man to grab the hand of his son and hold it tightly. “The fuck you want?”, he asked and groaned loudly, putting his free hand against his head, having quite the headache from drinking all night long.

“I’m hungry”, the boy said and bit his bottom lip only to get a glare from his father who let go of the small arm between his hands, sitting upright.

“So what? Make yourself some food”, he replied with anger in his voice and reached over to a full beer bottle.

“Dad, please. Stop drinking and buy food, I don’t have any money for that!”, JJ said with frustration washing over him. “If mom would be here this wouldn’t be happening at all!”

That caused his father to glare even more at him and he got up within a flash, shoving the boy to the ground into some empty beer bottles which broke, cutting JJ’s arm. He hissed in pain and looked up at his father with fearful eyes.

“It’s your fault she is gone! Get a job if you want money!”, Luke screamed at the child in front of him, throwing the full bottle at him, the impact right next to his head. The smell of alcohol reached JJ’s nose and his whole body was shaking, not sure if his father had actually aimed at the ground or just missed his head.

His father had never hurt him until today.

Deep in his bones he felt like it wasn’t going to be the last time.

Weeks passed by and he had to adapt to his father’s moods or else he would get a beating, over and over again. Whenever he said or did something wrong he would immediately feel it. Bruises were covering his body but when a teacher or another child asked what had happened he would just lie, telling them he fell while playing, things like that. After all, he had promised his mother to keep quiet about it or bad things would happen.

He was wandering the streets with an empty stomach once again, not quite sure where to go, he just didn’t want to be at home with his father, so he tended to spend as much time away from the place he used to love as possible.

At some point he reached a place where he had never been before and if he was honest, he didn’t even quite know how he got here, probably a wrong turn he took at some point. There was a house and it was a little hidden from the bushes but it had a pier and seemed quite bit.

“Hey there”, someone behind him said and when JJ turned around he looked into the eyes of a boy with fluffy hair that was longer than his own.

“Hey”, he replied, not quite sure what to make of the situation. The other boy was holding a ball in his hands and grinned. JJ felt like he had seen him around, probably at school but as he wasn’t a fan of other kinds, they probably never talked.

“I’m John B.!”, the other child said and held one of his hands out, waiting for JJ to shake it which he did.

“JJ”, he replied and smiled slightly back. Before he could say anything else his stomach was rumbling loudly and John B started to laugh.

“You hungry, JJ? My dad makes the best pasta and it should be done soon!”, the brown haired boy said and seemed totally excited for such simple food, something JJ could understand. Yesterday he had to eat moldy bread because his father didn’t get groceries again, it was a surprise he wasn’t ill yet.

“I’d love that”, JJ said and grinned, following John B. to the house where he also met the father of the other child, a nice man that took care of his son, something JJ only barely remembered.

They became friends quite quickly and soon enough, JJ was at John B’s place more than anywhere else. Not even the treehouse could compete anymore. Luke never asked where he had been anyway and Big John, John B’s father, never asked any questions as he seemed to notice the sadness inside of the blonde boy.

With them, JJ didn’t feel so lonely anymore, knowing he had a place to go when he needed food or just a hug. Big John became like a second father to him, one that was worth being called like that. He wasn’t judged here, was bullied because of being dyslexic and Big John would always help him with his homework, something Luke had never done at all.

Since JJ was coming here, the beatings almost stopped as he barely saw his own father anymore. If it was for him, the Routledge family could just adopt him but sadly that wasn’t an option.

 I never noticed, until I focused On everything you did, you said You lit the fuse inside my head Thank you for reminding me Of why I'm sick inside Thank you for the venom Did you think it would paralyze?

 Four years had passed with JJ living at John B’s place more than his own, four years had passed without a word from his mother. At this point, she was dead to him. It was easier to call her that instead of thinking that she is out there, maybe happy with another family.

He was a teenager now and with that, he noticed the change around him quite well. He wasn’t a little kid anymore that only got glimpses of what was going on.

His father was a smuggler and a drug dealer and the only things he ever bought with that was alcohol. JJ hated him and normally he would be happy to have Big John as his second father.

Sadly, things had changed at the Chateau. Big John had become obsessed with a ship called ‘The Royal Merchant’, some legendary ship that sunk and had a lot of gold on board. He didn’t pay as much attention to the boys as before and didn’t tolerate JJ at his home that often anymore as the boys were quite loud when playing and hanging out.

Big John still loved both of them dearly but he wasn’t good at showing it anymore, so the boys spent a lot of time outside, doing their own thing, things that mostly weren’t really legal but no one cared anyway, so why should they? Shoupe showed up sometimes to scold them but they never really did anything so bad that he needed to arrest them. Most of the time the also simply ran away and Shoupe let them go.

It was also the time where the problems with the Kooks started. As soon as Middle School started, a lot of the former ‘normal’ kids went to a private school, some kind of Academy at Figure Eight and a bunch of them went off to private schools, not good enough anymore to learn at the same place like people from the Cut.

If you seperate kids like that, making one side feel special and the other side feel worthless, it wouldn’t take long for them to drift apart. The rich kids felt superior, were arrogant and threw around with money.

JJ was just someone from the Cut who didn’t have any money, sometimes didn’t even have food and with his temper, he was easily provoked by a lot of them. That was one of the reasons why he was at the police station currently.

A few of the boys who bullied him in his early years for being dyslexic and not having the best clothes were Kooks now, well, had always been but now it was showing even more. It had ended up in a fight which he had lost as they had been five and he had been alone, John B probably at home where he should be late at night.

“JJ? Your dad is here”, Deputy Shoupe said and JJ’s clenched his hand into a fist to stop his body from starting to shake in the first place. He already knew this wouldn’t end well but there was nothing he could do about it.

“I’m so sorry that you had to put up with him. I’ll teach him a lesson”, Luke simply said and Shoupe sighed, already expecting what the home life might be as Luke had been at the station quite often himself, mostly for drunken rampage.

“Make sure he understands that law actually applies to him and he isn’t a kid anymore. He is 13 years old and should act according to that,” the deputy tried to explain as he didn’t want to bring kids here that often but sometimes he had no other choice.

He had no idea that JJ would become a regular at the station just then.

The blonde boy huffed at the words of the deputy, his body tense and clenching his jaw a couple of times. He had no desire to go home with his father only to get beat up, maybe he could run away as soon as they got out of the station, Luke wouldn’t chase him because at the end of the day, he didn’t seem to give a shit about him.

Luke nodded and grabbed his son’s arm, pulling him outside a little more forcefully than needed. 

“Let go of me”, JJ hissed and tried to get his arm loose but Luke wouldn’t have any of it. He only let go as soon as they were in the car. So much for trying to run away.

“Listen you little shit, I don’t care if you’re around or not but for god's sake, don’t make me get you out of there, understood?”, Luke sounded angry but the boy next to him was more surprised that he didn’t get hit in the face already. Cramped spaces with his father couldn’t be a good thing and JJ just waited for the first right hook to hit him.

The boy didn’t say anything, simply looked out of the window while biting his bottom lip. Luke grumbled something under his breath before he started the car and drove them home.

To no one’s surprise, as soon as they got home JJ got pushed around, got yelled up, his father kicked him to the ground and gave him a couple of bruises together with a lot of insults that had burned into JJ’s mind at this point. He was used to all of this and yet it hurt so much, every single time.

It was the first time in quite a while that he had slept in his own bed, too exhausted to leave this place that had turned from home to hell. He should have run away again, to the Chateau or to the woods, somewhere where no one could hurt him but his body was giving out.

The next day he was about to get out of the house but his father saw him. “Where are you all the time anyway?”, Luke asked but didn’t sound really interested.

“Why do you care? At least I’m not drinking my life away”, JJ huffed and was about to get out of the house but stopped in his tracks, seeing his father’s wallet on the small table that was standing next to the door.

One look back in the living room to make sure his father was busy watching TV and he reached into the wallet, taking out a couple of bucks, not counting them. He simply put them in his own pockets and was out of the house.

After he was away in safe distance he counted the money and grinned when he saw that it was at least 60$. An idea was forming in the back of his head and he went downtown.

Later that evening he and JB were out with the boat. Big John taught them how to use it and only told them not to go too far. Thankfully his friend didn’t bring up his bruised face, JJ didn’t want to think about it, simply wanted to enjoy the time.

John B was quite surprised when JJ pulled out weed and alcohol.

“We gotta live a little, man. With your old man being busy and mine being an asshole, we have to look out for ourselves!”, JJ said as he stood at the bow and took the first pull on the blunt. He started to cough heavily and JB laughed loudly.

“Yeah, you’re not sounding like you’re going to survive that”, he teased and earned a glare from JJ.

It was the first time they got drunk and high and it would for sure not be the last time.

It also ended up in JJ getting beat up heavily by his father as soon as he found out that his son stole from him.

Only another reason to look for an escape from the world.

 So why do good girls like bad guys? I had this question for a real long time I've been a bad boy and it's plain to see So why do good girls fall in love with me?

 The past year had passed quickly enough and life wasn’t getting any better, not really. At least that’s what a sane person would say. JJ on the other hand found his life to be getting quite good, drowning his sorrows in alcohol and weed he consumed at parties at first, then also whenever he felt like it.

Deep inside he knew this wasn’t healthy and he shouldn’t do it, he might just end up like his father but he understood the power of those things to numb your feelings to a point where you didn’t care anymore. The only thing he cared about was having a good time with his best friend. No, with his brother, John B.

Now that Big John was totally drowning in his research the boys had a lot of time on their hands, skipping school more often to hang out on the boat, surfing whenever they could. JJ had become quite good at it, always claiming he was the best surfer on the island.

“Who’s that?”, JJ asked one day while they were laying on the beach, taking a break from surfing and enjoying the sun.

“Who?”, John B asked and looked into the direction where his friend was looking, seeing two girls who just came to the beach. “Oh. I don’t know, some girls?”

“Yeah, obviously, thank you for that observation. But the blonde one? Damn”, JJ said and licked his lips with a wolfish grin.

“JJ, no. Leave them be”, John B said with an edge in his voice and JJ raised his hands in defence.

“I’m just looking okay? Besides, they’re looking back.” He wiggled his eyebrows at JB and then looked back at the girls, waving a little.

“You’re embarrassing”, John said and facepalmed at his friends being way too obvious. “And you have no idea how to flirt.”

“Tsk, do you see this face?”, JJ asked and drew a circle around his face in the air. “This face doesn’t even need flirting skills, it’s totally enough. Also, I can flirt, watch me.”

With that JJ got up and sat down in the sand in front of the girls, talking to them for a while, John B watching him in horror. That was more than embarrassing now and he wished he could just bury himself in the sand.

Soon enough, JJ was waving him over and he obviously had no choice but to join them.

They had spent the whole day with the two girls and had a lot of fun with them, showing them their surfing skills and even teaching them some surfing basics. At first everything seemed like they would just be some tourists, here for the summer. Outer Banks was the paradise on earth after all.

It wasn’t the last time they had met up and soon enough JJ had to admit that he had a crush on Emma, the beautiful girl with blonde hair and green eyes. For him, she was beautiful.

“So, there’s a party tonight at the beach, you wanna come?”, Emma asked as she sat next to JJ on a fallen tree trunk on the beach and he grinned at her.

“You mean the boneyard one? I was planning to ask you that”, he exclaimed and she laughed, leaning her head against his shoulder.

“I can’t wait”, she whispered and he put an arm around her, blushing slightly while they were watching the sea. It was a calm day but he had no idea how messy it would get.

The party was already going strong when he and John B arrived later that evening and he didn’t waste a second to throw himself into it. Alcohol, weed and the girl he liked in his arms. He had a great time all night.

“I’m going to take a piss”, he said slightly drunk and Emma nodded, also quite intoxicated. She went over to another girl, probably a friend of her and JJ took another pull at his blunt again before throwing it in the sand, then going over to the woods where no one would see him.

Unknowingly to him, three boys were following him and caught him off guard while he was following nature’s call.“Hey Pogue!”, one of them said loudly and JJ jumped, pulling his pants up and buttoning it quickly.

“Damn, I know I have a pretty cock that y’all want to get a look at but don’t scare me to death. Also, not interested in boys, sorry”, he slurred in his drunken state but sobered up as soon as the first punch hit him right in the face.

Two of the boys rushed behind him to hold him while the one that spoke to him was cracking his knuckles.

“Leave the hands from my sister, alright? Dirty people like you shouldn’t touch her”, he said and hit JJ in the stomach which almost caused him to puke.

“Emma’s a Kook?”, he asked in disbelief while trying to catch his breath from the punch. He had no idea until now and it hurt more than it should. She should have told him.

“Yes, she is. That means she is better than you are, so stay away.”

The boy punched him again and again before the other two let JJ fall to the ground where he held his stomach in pain, cowering there and watching how blood was dripping from his lips.

“I already touched her a little bit so sorry about that. Guess she’s dirty now,” he coughed with a small laugh in between.

The words riled the Kook boy up and he kicked JJ in the ribs until he fell to his side, body bruised and bleeding. He spat on him before he signaled his two boys to leave.

JJ breathed heavily and felt like his whole body was falling apart right now. He had really liked that girl but the gap between Kooks and Pogues were almost a bottomless pit. Soon enough she would have left him anyway when she found out that he didn’t have any money. 

Her brother had ripped the rose-colored glasses right out of JJ’s face and he sighed heavily.

His life would probably never change. He would always be that worthless piece of shit that couldn’t do anything right. He would never be worth anything.

It was only two hours later that John B found him bruised and battered, almost passed out on the ground.

For JJ, it had only felt like minutes while staring at the sky, watching the trees move in the wind.

He didn’t want a doctor so John B just took him to the Chateau, wondering why his father wasn’t there but maybe it was for the better right now. He took care of JJ’s wounds and let him rest in his bed while he slept on the couch for the night.

The next morning, JJ felt like death. His body was hurting, his head was exploding and the realization washed over him that his first crush, his first love, was gone and he had no chance of getting her back. Maybe he was over dramatic as he was only a teenager but the pain was real.

John B came in with breakfast and sat down at the bed.

“How are you feeling?”, his friend asked and JJ just scoffed.

“Exactly how I look like”, he answered and reached to get a sandwich from the plate. Even chewing hurt.

“I see.” JB said and looked at his brother. His face was bruised badly, several cuts and a blue eye and he knew there were a lot of purple bruises under the blanket. “You going to tell me what happened?”

“Emma’s a fucking Kook and her brother reminded me that I’m just a dirty pogue”, he explained after swallowing and his eyes were filled with anger.

“She’s what?! Damn, I didn’t see that coming”, John B said and took a sandwich on his own, putting the now empty plate aside. “I’m sorry, heartbreak is shitty.”

JJ huffed and clenched his jaw. “A heart can’t break when it wasn’t even whole to start with.”

Silent fell over them for a while and JJ took a deep breath. Ever since his mother had left them and his father turned into this...monster, he didn’t feel like he was whole. There was a void in his heart that no one had been able to fill. Emma had come close, giving him some kind of love that he had been missing over all those years and yet, that was gone too before it even started. He would probably never see her again and it made him so, so angry.

“Who’s her brother?”, JB asked after a while, trying to get JJ out of his head before he got deeper into any thoughts he shouldn’t think.

“I don’t know, it was dark and I had trouble seeing anything, ya know, being drunk and getting beaten up at the same time.” He didn’t want to sound so sarcastic but he couldn’t stop right now or else he would cry. It was a self mechanism kicking in, protecting him from pity and his friends from worry. “But you know what that means, right?”

“I’m not sure I like where this is going.” John B finished his sandwich and looked at JJ, whose whole body was tense now.

“It’s war. We pay those Kooks back, somehow. They’ll wish they never got that close to the Cut”, he growled and for a moment, John B could swear that his friend was changing even more.

The sweet innocent boy with the sad eyes from a few years back were gone, replaced by someone who just wanted revenge on the world.

In a way, John B could understand him. The anger, the fear, the sadness and he would stay by JJ’s side, no matter what.

 There's so much more You can reclaim your crown You're in control Rid of the monsters inside your head Put all your faults to bed You can be king again

 Revenge had this funny thing of never ending.

Pogues vs Kooks. Over and over again. At this point, it was mostly Rafe Cameron and his minions that was annoying them to no end. There wasn’t an exact moment where it had started but given their nature, it was easy for them to provoke people who had less than them. It was a rivalry that wouldn’t end that fast.

JJ and John B had made some more friends along the way, Pope Heyward and Kiara Carrera. The latter was actually a Kook but after a long time, JJ came to accept her into the group because he had proven herself. She was now one of them, a Pogue, something her parents and old ‘friends’ weren’t fond of.

He had found a little family within them. A family that didn’t ask many questions when they met up and he was all bruised. At this point, they all knew about his father and that they couldn’t change a thing. He was taking it in silence because he knew he had no other choice. The police wouldn’t care and given that he was at the station quite frequently, he didn’t want their help anyway.

Overall, authorities weren’t much of his thing. Too often disappointed by the police or his teacher when he was trying to get help without saying it outright because he just couldn’t. No one helped him, he was on his own, he had learned that. If you wanted something, you had to get it yourself. The only people he truly trusted were his friend and trust didn’t come easily with him.

Life had also this thing of throwing him rocks in the way. Well, this time, it was actually John B’s rock and it was quite a big one.

His father had gone on a trip to find ‘The Royal Merchant’ and never returned. The authorities didn’t take much time to declare him dead, boat in the storm, shit like that. His uncle was supposed to take care of John B now but well...he wasn’t the most reliable person on this island.

When it happened, John B had changed quite a bit, sadness and anger taking over him and the only person who was there for him was JJ. He was there all the way during the first three stages of grief and he would stay for the others too.

First came denial, neither of the boys wanted to accept the fact that Big John was dead. He could still be alive after all, just being lost somewhere. He might find his way home again, no one knew and yet, they claimed he was dead so they wouldn’t need to keep looking. JJ had almost beat up Shoupe at the news but seeing John B just sit in his living room in silence without being able to talk stopped him.

The world became meaningless for a while and JJ had to accept the fact that it was hurting him almost as much as it hurt John B. It wasn’t his own father that had gone missing but it almost hurt like it was because Big John had been quite a father figure to him all those years. The following days were filled with getting drunk and weed, trying to numb the feelings that were eating them up inside. Everything felt overwhelming at once and the boys were really happy they had Kie and Pope to keep them grounded, at least a little bit.

It didn’t take long for the denial to pass and suppression of feelings didn’t help anymore. the feelings they were trying to keep inside were coming to the surface and they were a handful.

Anger was red, anger was fire, anger was starting shit with some Kooks that ended up with the two boys being hurt pretty badly but they finally felt something other than pain on the inside. It helped them to feel alive again after all the numbness.. JJ and John B were at the Chateau, bruised and battered but damn, it had been worth it. It also got them quite the scolding from Kie.Sadly, society had always been afraid of anger but right now, it was the only anchor, especially for JJ who never really learned how to deal with his feelings with anything other than anger, his father had taught him that early on. Sometimes he wished he could control it but it never worked, his fist connecting with a face before he could even finish thinking about it.

Third was bargaining, something that JB would be doing for the next year until the truth would come out but right now, it was the only thing that kept him sane. JJ on the other hand wasn’t so sure anymore, he was already so done with being in grief. He already knew these feelings from when his mother had left and he hated all of them and yet, there was no way to stop them, they’ve tried that after all.

“I can’t believe he’s gone”, JJ said to his friend as they were laying on the pier, just chilling and watching the clouds move in peace.

“He’s not. I know he is alive, I can feel it”, John B said and sighed heavily.

JJ looked over at him and bit his bottom lip. The loss of Big John almost felt like he had lost his own father. He wasn’t sure if it was okay to feel like this because he knew that it hit John B way harder than him but Big John had always been an anchor in his life, someone he could go to when he had some real troubles even though he didn’t use this option much as he got older but it had always been there.

But now? Now every option was ripped away from him.

His mother? Off to somewhere, probably living a better life, one that she deserved. JJ understood that she had to leave because of his father being a violent bastard and her son being a worthless piece of shit. One look at him now would just prove the point. He skipped school, he got drunk and smoked weed on a regular basis, he might have a job but it was only paying enough so he could buy food and beer because his father was only buying one of those two things..

Speaking of, his father was still a bastard. After Big John’s death and John B’s uncle moving in for a while he didn’t have the chance to stay over as they needed to get their affairs in order. During that time he had to go home if he wanted to sleep in an actual bed and his father didn’t miss a chance to start beating him quite frequently again. JJ knows that he should defend himself, just punch back but at the same time, there was still that fearful child inside of him that screamed ‘No, just take it’. So he was doing just that. Maybe he would have the courage one day but right now, he was still too afraid.

Big John was out at sea, maybe dead, maybe alive, no one knew. Of course JJ would prefer it if the older man was still alive but the chances were small, he had to admit that. He wouldn’t say it outright to John B, leaving his best friend the little hope he had left.

“Let’s just hope your uncle manages to get his shit together so they don’t take you to the mainland”, JJ said and sighed heavily while sitting up to look at his feet dangling close to the water. He knew that child services would take his best friend away at some point if it wasn’t working out with his uncle and they only had foster care on the island. He wasn’t going to let that happen.

“I know he will, he’s already trying very hard”, John B said quite hopeful but one look from JJ and the blonde boy knew that his friend wasn’t so sure about that himself.

“I’ll sneak you out of here if I have to, off to Mexico or somewhere else”, JJ said and JB started to laugh a little.

“Thanks, I appreciate the effort.” John B smiled at his friend and JJ grinned back at him, giving him a thumb up.

“We’ll stay together, no matter what. Someone has to protect your dirty ass from the Kooks anyway.” JJ was pretty convinced he was the best person to protect the people from his group as he had the best right hook.

“Hey boys”, Kie said as she was arriving at the pier and both of them got up. “I bought some treats.” She held up a basket with food and beer and JJ grinned at her.

“That’s my girl”, he said and was about to reach over to grab himself a bottle of beer but she just held the basket away.

“First, not your girl. Second, these are for later”, she said and pushed him away with a hand slightly.

JJ held both of his hands over his heart. “Ouch, you wound me.”

Kie just rolled her eyes and she and John B got on the boat. They had planned to go to the marsh together today, just forgetting the world around them with a small party on their own. It had become one of their favourite places.

“Sorry, I’m late!”, Pope said and came running, breathing heavily.

“Whoa calm down there before you pass out”, JJ said and clapped his friend on the back who was bending over, hand on his knees, trying to catch a breath.

JJ and Pope got on the boat too and John B was starting the motor. They had no idea what was coming up for them during the next year.

The bargaining would soon enough become depression and acceptance with a lot of more rocks in their way.

The blonde boy was standing at the helm, steering the small boat to the marsh and smiled a little to himself.

Life wasn’t perfect but it was good enough for him. His found family was there for him if his biological family wasn’t. His father would probably never change and yet, he sometimes felt that Luke loved him, somewhere deep down between the surface, between all the anger and the drinking.

He promised to himself that he would stand up to his father one day, that he would escape the poverty he had grown up with. He never wanted to be hungry again, never wanted to steal to survive.

One day he would get out of this life and make something out of it. He may hate his mother to some degree but she always wanted something better for him. 

He wanted to make her proud. He wanted to make his friends proud.

Most of all he wanted to stop feeling worthless and he would find a way to do that.

He also promised to himself he would never lose someone again that was important to him and he would do everything for his friends.

[evanescent-art]

❝ Dabi Todoroki :: Short Story :: If I fall ❞

  。＼｜／。

Synopsis :: Dabi may have been caught, but the interrogation couldn't break him more than his childhood already had.

。／｜＼。

Okay, you got me. I'm crazy. But listen here - The fact that I acknowledge it in an intellectual way makes me just as sane as everyone else. It's not like I do the shit that I do for no reason. In the beginning, I had a guilty conscience. I questioned constantly if I was doing the right thing. Always had a nagging voice in the back of my head that told me that I would regret it one day. This voice happened to remind me that once I go, I can't turn back. It took awhile, but believe me when I tell you, that voice is long gone.

Now, I feel nothing.

Except, of course, these damned handcuffs that felt likey they were cutting into the flesh of my wrists. Using my quirk was futile. With these cuffs, there was a tingling sensation throughout my body. That feeling you get when your hands or feet are on pins and needles. Even If I wanted to, I wasn't stupid enough to try and fight my way out of this interrogation room with a building full of hero-wannabes.

The door behind me opens and closes. I suck in an annoyed breath and prepare for the obvious.

"You go by Dabi, right?" a man slid into the seat on the opposite side of me, gently sliding the folders on the table in front of him.

"Aren't you observant," I drawl, feigning amusement in my tone. I look this man dead in his dark eyes. He doesn't seem to be intimidated, but I wanted him to know that neither was I.

He cleared his throat, finding my sarcasm a good enough answer. I raise an eyebrow. I can't stand half-assed people.

He continues despite my clear disinterest, "my name is Koriko Ho-"

I really don't care.

"-and I'm going to ask you some questions," he glances down at the paper. "For starters, Is Dabi your real name?"

I chuckle slowly.

"Wouldn't you like to know?" This time I actually am amused. They seriously can't expect me to just hand over my identity so easily. I almost find it insulting. Only an idiot would do that, especially in my damned-to-all-hell case. Yet, the idea of my father's name being all over the news for his villain-son appealed to me a little. The humiliation it would undoubtedly give him was tempting, truly.

"We'll find out one way or another," his voice sounded as though it was forcing to stay calm. His slight discontent brings me further satisfaction. I allow the corner of my lips to curl into a small smirk. Koriko takes a small breath.

"You know what, how about we not beat around the bush, yeah?" Koriko says. Now he's speaking my language. "You were turned in by pro-heroes after a fight in an abandoned building downtown. You were left behind by your colleague, am I correct?"

Left behind isn't the term I would use. I did this willingly. I may be a damaged villain, but the one's that were there for me I have their back. I'm loyal. It was a classic 'wrong place, wrong time' sort of deal. I needed to gather just enough time to let Toga get away. If staying behind to face a fight alone to allow someone like a sister to me escape while she was recovering from her own wounds, so be it. It's worth it.

"I'm not telling you a damn thing. Save your energy for someone more useful to you," I advise. I lean back in my chair, keeping my eyes trained on him.

He pressed his lips into a thin line, takes a deep breath, and pushed his glasses up his nose.

"I tried to do this the moral way, you know," he tells me, as if I knew what the hell that meant. Until he adds, "without my quirk."

"Your quirk?"

"Feeling reading. I try not to do it as often as possible," Koriko pursed his lips and looked me up and down, no doubt noting my momentary surprise. "After all, people like to keep their feelings to themselves. Yet, you are a curious case."

So I've been told many times. I stay silent.

"You're in a lot of pain," he continues. His eyes go over my excessive burns for a moment. "Physically and emotionally. Mostly emotionally."

"I don't need you as my damn therapist," I scoff.

"I sense depression. I sense something hollow as well. Anger." Koriko looks as though he wishes he could stop, but doesn't. I begin to get a little uneasy, because I happen to be a personal person that takes a great offense to someone violating my mind, "Yet, you have it all bottled up, huh?"

"Stop."

"You need help. You want help."

"No, I don't. I'll deal with shit on my own like I always had," despite my deadpanned tone, it was obvious to this man that he was striking some nerve. The nerve that I have of violating my thoughts. My feelings. The only thing I was able to keep to myself.

Koriko smiles a bit.

"That's where the hollow feeling comes from, isn't it?" He says to me . It seemed that the more irritated I got, the more intrigued he became. I liked it better when he was the one getting angry. Then again now that I think about it, it probably wasn't anger. More like stain from trying not to use his quirk. I suddenly felt like the little bit of power I had left had been taken away.

What's the point?

I was going to jail. Most likely for a long time. It wasn't like I could save myself. The realization that I was only stalling the inevitable hit me hard. Suddenly, all I wanted was to get out of this room. Away from this man. I grew tired.

"Touya Todoroki," I tell him. The name sounded disgusting coming off the tongue. I look away from him to avoid the shock on his expression.

"Now that explains it," Koriko nodded slowly, stopped himself to think for a moment, then added. "I heard things, you know. That you were the one that drove your own mother crazy, not your little brother. Just rumors, of course."

I wanted to hurt him.

My expression shifts to a rage that I try and breathe deeply to contain it better. An image of that pathetic woman comes to my mind. She did nothing. Nobody ever did anything. She sat by and let me hurt. Let her children hurt. Oh, I never blamed my siblings. They were victims to that ass just as much as I was. I can only Imagine how it's been since I've been gone. I suppress the urge to envision it myself.

Shoto looked like me, didn't he?

It hurt because this man was most likely right. And I hated it.

"I'd hate to see the look on Endeavor's face when he sees you like this," Koriko was starting to sound like a demon, nagging at my deepest ticks. It was like he was made to do this. I hated him. I hated everyone.

"I don't give a damn what he thinks anymore," I seethe. If I could slam my hands on the table I would have. "Why do you insist on being so invasive?"

"Because I happen to think that you are far too young and damaged to be sitting in front of me!" Koriko raised his voice, standing up with his papers. He looks strained now.

"Where are you going?" I ask.

He stops and turns to me, unsure of what to say at first.

"Because your feelings are far too intense for me to take right now. It's making my head hurt."

I was left to do nothing but let those words sink in.