#he probably did that a lot now that i think about it…
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ɪɴᴅᴜʟɢᴇɴᴄᴇ
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a three week paid-vacation provided by your captain gave rise to the opportunity to finally show you the gift sylus had gotten you. and no, it isn’t the yacht you’re on—but he wouldn’t be opposed to giving you that either.
[ !! ] — mdni | established relationship, smut, breeding kink, pregnancy mention, fingering, oral (female receiving), praise kink, mating press, unprotected sex, sylus is soft in the bedroom okay now hush ;; alcohol mention (sylus drinks whiskey), fluff. oh did I mention soft! sylus?? uhhh maybe more tags than this idk there’s a lot going on lmao. unedited af I know that’s a warning. if y’all see cut sentences just know it’s a brain glitch >.< lol
a/n: Happy Valentine’s Day! phew i got this out before it ended hehe just in the nick of time. I do wanna forewarn everyone I don’t actively write smut so I deeply apologize for any sort of repetitiveness or just it being inaccurate and rushed overall, my apologies. but please enjoy reading! bc i wanna curl up and die and delete this after writing it actually lmao I’ll probably never write anything like this again haha
word count: roughly 4.8k
The starry expanse of sky moves quickly outside of the window of the car, nothing but a blur of cosmic colors. Where you’re going you’re not quite sure, with all the secrecy from Sylus and the twins. It’s something Sylus has clearly planned for awhile, from the way he wanted you to dress tonight, but you’re still unable to put your finger on it.
At the very least, you’re glad that Kieran is the one that’s driving instead of Luke.
“Are you two going to tell me where we’re going yet?”
“Afraid not, Miss,” Kieran replies. “That’d be against orders from Boss.”
“Are we at least almost there yet?” you ask.
“We have about ten more minutes,” Luke chirps. “Then you’ll finally get to see Boss, don’t worry.”
You’re stunned into a mild fluster and look at your hands in your lap. You heard the twins snicker and you can’t help but shake your head incredulously. Oh well. You’re almost to your destination anyway.
After the last two months of an increase in Wanderer appearances, you could most certainly use a break. It’s been nothing short of hectic, battles here and evacuations there and the occasional dumbass that doesn’t want to listen to the warnings given out that an area is too dangerous to go into.
You softly sigh. You really shouldn’t be thinking about work.
You tug the large coat on your shoulders over you further, closing your eyes and sinking into the warmth and the smell of the man it belonged to.
Whatever in the world Sylus had planned must be big, even so that he couldn’t be bothered to tell even the twins exactly what he had in store. All the three of you knew was that he had a surprise, and the two brothers were more than happy to have the opportunity to have the base to themselves.
You just wish you knew where you were going.
“Is this it?”
“I think so. Ah, there’s Boss.”
Oh, already?
True to word, you open your eyes and see a familiar patch of silver against the darkness of the world. And you also happen to see a very, very large yacht not far from him.
A marina? You blink incredulously. A private fucking marina. Good lord, how much money does this man really have?
Upon stopping, you watch as Sylus turns his head slightly to the car. Luke quickly jumps from the passenger side and opens the door for you, ushering his hand outward dramatically and says, “After you, Miss.”
The heel of your shoe clicks against pavement as you step out, holding Luke’s hand for stability until you find your balance.
“Thanks, Luke.”
“Not a problem! Enjoy the honey— Uh, vacation!”
Luke jumps back into the car, more than likely to save himself from your questioning eyes. You can’t help but shake your head and make your way toward Sylus and the man in uniform, more than likely the captain of the yacht.
“Ah, Mrs. Sylus,” greets the captain with a tilt of his hat. His eyes blink as he does a once-over on you and then laughs. “I was wondering what kind of woman would tie such a man down, and now I understand. Please, come aboard.”
Your brows raise at Sylus as the captain pivots and boards the yacht. “Care to explain that?”
Sylus, in all his audacity, simply shrugs and smiles. “Nothing to explain, sweetie. He came up with that himself after I told him my lady would be joining me.”
You scoff in disbelief, but can’t help the small smile that falls to your lips. You take Sylus’s arm, wrapped your hand in the crook of his elbow as he leads you onto the ship.
“It’s beautiful,” you murmur, gazing around as he takes you to the deck. And you could only imagine what it would be like when you went out to sea.
“I figured you would like it,” he murmurs. “Glad to see my instincts weren’t wrong.”
You don’t miss the way his red eyes look to you, knowing he’s waiting for your words of affirmation. You laugh behind your hand, because yeah, he’s right.
You hum, taking his hand in your own. “Thank you for considering me.”
You also don’t miss the way his large fingers eagerly twine with your own, nor the way his eyes soften and blend with devotion and affection.
“Always.”
Thirty minutes pass before the ship takes off into the open sea. You barely feel it until Sylus has you stand to take you back outside from the dining area.
“So, where are we going?” you ask, gazing up at him.
Sylus’s mouth twitches into a smirk. “It’s a surprise.”
You grumble, humoring the man. “Of course it is.”
Sylus’s coat never leaves your shoulders the couple hours you’re both out on the deck. He seems to enjoy that, too; you wearing his clothes sparks something behind his eyes that you’re all too familiar with. The thought itself has your cheeks warming and thighs pressing together.
He flicks his wrist to check his watch when a timer beeps twice. You can’t help it when your eyes linger on his hand. You’ve always had a fixation on his them—on how big and warm they are in comparison to yours, on how his long fingers stretch across your body, and how they gently wrap around you and pull you close like he’d die without touching you. Those hands that had once forced you to attempt to resonate with him for three days had become soft, remorseful and loving. And he’d more than earned your forgiveness.
“Dinner should be ready.”
You grin. “You brought your chef?”
“Just for this trip,” he retorts, standing to full height. “Come.” His hand outstretches to you and you take it without hesitation.
You don’t miss the way his eyes briefly light up at the way your fingers immediately interlace with his. It’s a small joy to you, but to him it means everything—a testament to how far the two of you have come.
Dinner, as always, is perfect. Dessert even more so. You’re not too full, but more than satisfied. You give your compliments to the chef, who in turn happily skips back to the kitchen like he’s on cloud nine. And you can’t help but look at Sylus and smile as he downs his whiskey like it’s water.
“You don’t compliment your chef enough,” you comment. “One sentence from me and he acts like he’s never heard praise.”
Sylus hums as his brows raise, humored. He chuckles with the whiskey in his mouth before swallowing it to retort, “He knows his cooking is excellent. I suppose I just have a limit to how many compliments I can give out in a day.”
You place your chin in your hand. “Oh, really? Then how many do I get to have in a day?”
Adoration fills his ruby orbs. “As many as you want, my beloved.”
His hand reaches for your left over the table. Sylus’s thumb rubs over your fingers, resting atop your ring finger.
“Have I told you that you look exquisite tonight?” he whispers.
“You haven’t,” you reply cheekily. “I think you owe me a few more, don’t you think?”
The soft music in the background dies as you begin to hear your heart thunder in your ears. You do hope that Sylus can’t hear it pounding away like you can.
“Seems like I do,” he says in an exhale, leaning back in his seat but not letting go of your hand. His eyes have changed—once filled with adoration, now filled with a fire that makes heat rise to your cheeks and desire burn between your legs. “I don’t think I’ve shown you the bedroom yet, have I?”
You grin. “You haven’t. I’d like to see it.”
But what you don’t anticipate is your man standing and abruptly lifting you into a one arm carry. Your sharply inhale in surprise, arms immediately weave around his neck for support, but you know he’d never drop you anyway.
You trail your nose under his jaw, pressing a long kiss to his skin by his ear. Your fingers dig into his shoulder, the subtle presser making him hasten his long strides.
“Sweetheart—” Sylus gulps as you press two fingers to his mouth to silence him.
You pepper slow kisses down his neck, nipping at the skin every other kiss. It’s when you reach his collarbone you hear the click of a door. And seconds later you find the plush fabric of blankets underneath you and Sylus’s firm hand cradling the back of your head as he tilts your head back to capture your lips with his.
Between each heated kiss you attempt to catch your breath, only for your lover to devour your mouth with his own again and again.
“Mmmh— Sylus, let me—” another kiss “—catch my breath.”
He has a hard time pulling away. Sylus rests on one knee at the edge of the bed, hands grasping at the back of your bare calves as he catches his own breath and tries to pull himself back to his senses before he finishes himself off early.
While you toss your head back and close your eyes, trying to let oxygen catch up to your brain, Sylus lifts his head to look at you. He drinks in your appearance—the starry night sky sewn into the strapless obsidian dress (one that he had specially made for you) accentuated your body exactly the way he envisioned.
As he watches your breasts rise and fall with every breath, he feels his pants tighten even more. He’s so painfully hard just from simply kissing you—a testament to what you do to him, how deeply you affect him.
He rests his head against the plush of your thigh. As he trails his hand down your leg, he realizes you still have your heels on.
Your head snaps up at the feeling of one heel coming off, then the other.
“Sylus, what— Oh, shit.”
The momentum of him lifting your body further up the bed and hiking your dress up catches you off guard. His mouth latches to your thighs, kissing and biting all the way up until he reaches the fabric of your panties—the only thing between him and what he wants.
“Such a dark red, darling,” he hums. “Was this for me?”
“It might’ve been,” you tease.
As his finger loops around the red fabric covering you, Evol ready to help rip it off, your hand makes its way into his hair and tugs, forcing his eyes to attention.
“Rip these, I’m okay with that. Rip the dress, and I’ll kill you,” you say, half-joking. But damn did you really like this dress.
He chuckles, eyes glazed with lust. “Understood.”
As soon as he tears them away and hikes your dress even further around your hips, Sylus’s mouth does nothing short of devour your pussy. You let out the loudest, wanton moan you’ve ever heard from yourself as his tongue buries itself in and against your folds. Your head falls back against the pillows, hands moving to grip the sheets beneath you to maintain some semblance of being grounded as Sylus eats you out like a starved man. Your legs are over his shoulders, allowing him the best access to your womanhood.
“Oh— Fuuuck, Sylus. Ohmygod, please don’t stop,” you beg, threading one hand through his hair again, grip tighter than earlier.
His reply comes in the form of him pushing his thick middle finger inside of you and mouth sucking on your clit. You wail, bucking your hips into his mouth. His ring finger promptly follows, stretching your cunt and sinking deep inside of your walls. Tears of overstimulation line your eyes as you grasp at then pillow behind your head.
Both hands twine into his silver locks of hair, pressing him deeper into you. What you miss amidst your own haze of ecstasy is Sylus grinding himself against the mattress to find some sense of relief. His mind is at war, wanting nothing more than to cum right then and there versus wanting to watch his seed spill from your hole. It takes every ounce of self-control of his own body to not climax while he simultaneously loses his mind while his mouth is attached to your cunt.
“Don’t— Please— Sylus! Sylus, I’m gonna—”
Your back arches off of the bed, and you can’t help but press him further into you and grind against his face. Sylus’s arms wrap around your thighs, holding you steady. The deep groan of his satisfaction that leaves him only spurs you on further and further and further until your thighs clench around his head and you cum. Hard.
And Sylus more than enjoys sucking and licking away at your release as you climax, prolonging it as much as he can. He lifts your lower body into the air as he continues his onslaught of your pussy with his mouth and tongue, the pressure of your thighs on either side of his head making him dizzy. Your essence coats his chin and nose, your scent driving all his senses wild and pulls the remainder of his blood down to his cock.
He gains a free hand as you tighten your legs around his shoulders. He unbuckles his belt and slips it off with practiced ease before moving to unzip and unbutton his pants, tugging away at them.
When your hips stop shaking is when Sylus grabs your thighs with both hands and sets your body back down on the mattress. He hovers over you once again, taking in your disheveled appearance and partially-lidded eyes. His long fingers brush your skin and cradle your jaw.
“Still with me, sweetheart?” he asks.
You pant and gaze up at him. “Barely.” You swallow. “That tongue of yours is brutal.”
Sylus laughs. It’s almost enough to make him forget about the painful fact that his cock is straining against his pants. Until your knee brushes against it when you lift yourself from the bed and he groans.
You giggle as his head presses against your shoulder.
“You really shouldn’t neglect yourself like that,” you hum, wrapping an arm around his shoulder.
Sylus’s lips meet your neck opposite of your arm wrapped around him and presses a long kiss to your sweaty skin, murmuring hotly into your ear, “There’s no one to blame but you, beloved. And I highly suggest you take responsibility.”
You moan and arch into him as his hands work on your dress, unzipping the back entirely and lowering it just below your breasts. You arch your back so he can undo the bra, and as soon as it’s on the floor, his mouth is on your chest. Sylus sucks and bites at your nipples, worshipping them and your breasts as he grinds his clothed erection into your bare pussy, soaking his dress pants in your juices.
You begin unbutton his shirt through the haze of your desire… before you slip your hands through the remaining buttons and fully rip his dress shirt apart, exposing his thick torso. You both chuckle at the sound of the buttons hitting the floor.
“Impatient?”
“Like you aren’t,” you remark.
Sylus shrugs off his shirt in a fluid motion and tosses it to the side from one arm. You manage to slide off your dress within a few moments, just as Sylus manages to get off his pants and briefs and… Oh…
You’d almost forgotten how big he is. Sure, the two of you have spent a couple more… sensual evenings together since you had him use your place as a safe house (and then him bringing you to his), but it always makes you shudder when your eyes land between the apex of his muscular thighs.
His tip weeps with precum, heavy cock red and flushed and—
Sylus’s breath is hot against your ear as he asks, “Like what you see, darling?”
—goddamn it you need it inside of you.
Your nails dig into his bicep, your other hand wrapping around his neck to pull him into a heated kiss, and Sylus is more than happy to oblige. His kiss is deep and reverent. A small moan escapes him as you two briefly pull apart for air before diving back into one another.
Everything is hot; your cheeks are flushed with the heat of desire and your pussy aches to have Sylus buried inside of you.
You pull him down on top of you with the arm around his neck, your other hand grasping his cock and positioning it at your entrance. Sylus hisses, hips bucking slightly as his fingers clench at his attempts at restraint.
“Fuck,” he pants. His red eyes clear for a moment, turning into a gentleness reserved for you as he asks, “You think you can take it?”
“I think you ate me out enough earlier I’ll manage,” you joke. Then your nails dig into the meat of his back, the sensation making him softly hiss again. “But if you don’t I’ll be doing it for you then.”
Sylus chuckles, nose dipping to your collarbone.
“My beloved is always so greedy, isn’t she?”
There is no retort from you—only a loud moan as Sylus’s tip enters you fills the room. He stops after that though, and as you look up to him to ask him why he stopped, you’re stunned at the sight before you.
Sylus is flushed red, panting and sweating as his muscles flex.
“Sylus?”
“Don’t,” he warns, shaking his head. “Give me… a moment. You feel… too good.”
The implication is clear. Sylus’s head falls as he inches himself a little further, delighting in hearing you gasp as he sinks more and more inches of himself inside of you. It takes all he has not to just cum at the feel of you; every ounce of self-control he has is being tested. He’s never been harder in his life, and being inside of the woman he loves—who feels like heaven wrapped around his cock—only proceeds to spiral him into a deeper pit of pleasure.
“Sylus… Sylus, more, please,” you hears you beg.
He’s halfway in, trying to take his time and let the romance of the evening last. But at that, and the sensation of your nails digging into his back, he finds himself a goner and lets his hips fall into yours, sinking the remainder of his fat cock into the depths of your wet pussy. A deep shudder passes through him, bliss running through his body.
“Fuck. Fuck, you feel divine,” Sylus says in a deep exhale.
“You’re so big,” you gasp, eyes clouded with the haze of lust. “Oh, Sy, you feel so good.”
The praise goes to his head immediately. He drags his cock back out slowly and a whine escapes you, hating the emptiness. But when Sylus places your legs over his shoulders and leans over you, it’s over for you both.
Your eyes roll into the back of your head as Sylus rolls his hips, sliding his full length back into the warm expanse of your pussy. His head falls back, and the pace he sets proceeds to bury you both alive underneath overwhelming ecstasy.
“Do you have any idea what you do to me?” he pants, clenching his fist into the sheet. “How I feel every time I look at you? Utter perfection is all I see. Do you feel what you do to me, darling?”
All you can feel is Sylus’s weight on top of you and the feel of his heavy cock inside of you as he stretches you open on him, carving your pussy into the shape of his cock. His pelvis rubs against your clit deliciously, spurring you on further. As much as you want to drive your hips up to meet his thrusts, Sylus has you pinned down into a mating press and all you can do is take what he’s giving you.
The papping noises of your bodies meeting filled the room, sending your thoughts into an even dirtier place. He feels so good reaching so deep inside of you, tip rubbing against that special spot perfectly, like you’re made to be perfect for each other. You clench around Sylus at another thought and he inhales sharply.
“What’re you thinking about?” he questions.
You shake your head. “N-Nothing.”
His long fingers grab your jaw gently. “Tell me.”
And then he slows his pace. “No, Sylus—”
“Then tell me what my beloved is thinking in that pretty head of hers,” he murmurs into your ear. “Or else.”
“I was thinking… about… Uhm…” Sylus rolls his hips back into you, his heavy balls pressing against your ass as he awaits your answer.
“Well?”
“I, uh— A baby.”
At the word, you shy away into your arm. But Sylus doesn’t say anything, which makes you confused. After a couple seconds, you gaze back up at him. His eyes show how stunned he is, pupils blown as no doubt the word also revolves around his own mind.
“Sylus, I— Oh, fuucckk.”
His body weight presses your body into the mattress further, leaving you at his mercy as Sylus’s pace becomes brutal, like he’s let his base instincts take over. His big hand finds yours and twines your fingers together as he drives his cock into your pussy over and over and over again, the squelching noises only growing louder and louder in your ears.
“My kitten… wants a baby then?” He hums into your ear. “She wants me to cum inside of her and carry my baby, is that right?”
“It was… just a thought.”
He laughs as your pussy clenches around him more at his words.
“Seems like it’s more than just a thought.”
Sylus’s mouth meets yours in another kiss, powered by something more than just lust. Your brain turns fuzzy and hot, reality beginning to finally blur as another climax ascends from the depths of your core.
Your eyes shut as his mouth finds the sweet spot on your neck. He sucks and nips at the skin with his teeth and you’ve no doubt that there’ll be plenty of love bites scattered across your skin for days after tonight.
When he nips at your ear, you squeak and clench around him again. Sylus groans into your ear, “Do that again.”
You oblige, clenching down on him and making him piston himself in and out of you faster. Every thrust turns into one that pushes the air from your lungs. All you can see, all you can feel is Sylus—feel his body heat as he presses your body down with his; feel the thickness of his cock stretch you open and the weight of his balls as they slap against your ass.
And it feels so good. The shlick and pap noises are getting to you. The coil that’s been winding up all night finally feels like it’s about to burst. Your back arches off the bed, breasts pressing into Sylus’s firm chest.
“Ohmygod, Sy, gonna cum, gonna cum fuckfuckfuuucckkk!”
He nips at your earlobe, biting down on it gently before whispering into your ear, “Indulge, my love. Indulge and I’ll fulfill every single one of your desires tonight.”
At long last, the coil snaps. Euphoria pilots itself to your brain and all across your body. You shake from the intensity, having to wrap your arms around Sylus to ground yourself as you reach your high.
Your orgasm sends him over the edge. He thrusts a few more times before he finds himself pressing himself as deep as he can possibly go and releasing his seed inside of your pussy. It’s almost too much, even for him. He doesn’t think he’s ever cum harder than tonight.
Your bodies rock together as you both fall from the heights of cloud nine. Sylus peppers your sweaty skin with kisses, across the bruised love bites he’d left earlier.
It’s only when he feels himself soft enough to slip out of you does he ask, “A family?”
Sylus’s voice is soft. So soft in fact that you barely hear him. You take a moment to reply, only to find yourself being easily lifted from the bed and onto Sylus’s chest.
“It’s… Something that’s crossed my mind a few times,” you admit bashfully.
Silence fills the air for a moment before he asks again, in the same, quiet tone he’d just used.
“With me?”
Your smile stretches across your face instantly. Your lips meet his chest, right over his heart. Your eyes meet his—uncertainty meeting unconditional love.
“And no one else.”
The next three days after are filled with you and Sylus partaking in all the activities that his yacht has to offer (plus more intimate times across the boat and it’s other rooms). He’d told you at one point that he would’ve just used the one he sails on regularly. But due to him wanting to spend more time with you than anything, and for you to have fun during the trip, he’d bought another and hired the captain to ensure safe passage.
Tonight however, was the night that you both were supposed to be arriving at your destination. You tried to help the anxiety and giddiness inside of you, trying to flatten it under a cool demeanor but Sylus just saw right through you.
Of course he would.
“There’s no reason to be nervous. It’s not like I’m taking you into enemy territory,” he jokes, gaze flicking to you from the stars in the open sky.
“I know that. I just can’t help it,” you mutter.
You shiver from the cold breeze, and Sylus shrugs off his leather jacket and places it over your shoulders. He leans down and zips it partway, resting his chin atop your head.
“Those hunter instincts of yours need to settle down,” he hums.
“I wish they would— Sylus!”
A hearty chuckle leaves him as you bounce away from his hold. Your eyes narrow at his treachery.
“What? Did I do something wrong?”
“Don’t you try and tickle me,” you warn playfully. You slip your arms through the sleeves of his leather jacket, trying to pull the sleeves back from over your palms to point at him. “Or I’m gonna tickle you back.”
Sylus smirks and rubs his fingers together. “Is that a challenge?”
“Mr. Sylus, Mrs. Sylus,” greets a familiar voice.
Embarrassment makes you duck your head away from the captain for a brief moment before you look at him.
“Just thought I’d come and let you know we’ll be docking soon.” The captain takes his hat off and bows before you both. “Thank you for allowing me the chance to sail you both for the last three days.”
Sylus nods his head in acknowledgment “Thank you for giving us safe passage, Arthur.”
Arthur nods, reapplies his cap and heads back to steer the ship into the upcoming port.
You don’t get to watch as he disappears since Sylus wraps his arms around you, pulling your chin to his chest. He presses a sweet kiss to your temple and murmurs, “I do believe we’re here.”
The distraction of the captain was long enough that the scenery before you had changed into the moonlit sea into a large landmass illuminated by the full moon above.
Your jaw drops open at the sight, eyes lighting up as you get closer and closer to the port where the ship would dock.
“Sylus, where are we?” you ask quietly.
“It’s an island,” he states. “One that I bought awhile back and was making… renovations for.”
“Renovations? For what?”
He laughs softly and looks at you like you’re a goddess. “For whom, you mean.”
Your eyes widen into saucers. Is he…? Could he seriously mean…?
“Sylus, you bought me an island?” you inquire, utterly flabbergasted.
“I can’t exactly un-buy it, so I do hope you’ll like it,” he replies. To your ears and yours alone you can hear his wavering tone, like he’s awaiting your disappointment. You can’t have that.
You cup his cheeks and force him to look at you again.
“Sylus, I love it; even if it’s the most absurd thing I’ve ever been gifted, I love it. It’s just going to take me time to get used to it,” you tell him. Then you step on your tippy-toes and give him an eskimo kiss. “Thank you. I love you.”
You kiss him there at the front of the ship, wrapped in his warm, protective embrace, momentarily oblivious to the world and your surroundings.
What you’re also oblivious to, and have been since the start of the trip, is the fat diamond ring that’s been tucked away, hidden in Sylus’s bottom drawer to his dresser. And also to the fact of his other reason of being nervous.
To him hoping that you’ll say “yes” when he gets down on one knee to ask you to marry him.
But he’ll save that for later. Right now he intends to indulge and savor your lips on his and you being tucked into him, safe from the world to be loved and worshipped by him.
And hopefully, for the rest of this lifetime.
#༄ kasswrites.#sylus x reader#sylus x you#sylus smut#sylus x y/n#sylus x mc#l&ds sylus#sylus love and deepspace#love and deepspace sylus#l&ds smut#l&ds x reader
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Is there beef with the Holstein cows and you or what was that joke lol
It's kind of wild It's just never come up on this blog before, but I HATE holsteins. Bottom 10 cow breeds for me. I hate how they're so common they account for the majority of milk produced. I hate that they're the "default" cow to the point where some don't even know cattle HAVE other colors. I hate their tiny horns (IF THEY EVEN HAVE THAT. LOSER ASS HORNLESS COW) and their painfully massive udders.
Legit I'm trying so hard to not launch into a No Mouth Must Scream style AM speech-- shoot my hand slipped.
(AM speech about why i dont like holsteins below the cut)
For starters, I have to give a brief lesson on what these terms mean; the "Holstein" is the American strain of the "Frisian" breed. Frisians are an ancient breed from Frisia, in the north of what we now consider the Netherlands. Crosses between the breeds are "Holstein-Frisians."
(There’s even more to this but im keeping it as simple as possible. Also one of my friends is Frisian and she is probably going to kill me for describing it like that.)
Historically, livestock was adapted to the environment they lived in. Frisians were bred by the Frisii people for hundreds of years in extremely grass-rich, lush, flat environments. The "polders" of the northern parts of the Netherlands. They're huge and eat a LOT of food.
Traditional Frisians were developed to produce as much meat and milk from a single individual as possible, without compromising the health of the cattle with constant inbreeding to get quick gains. We are talking about a breed that is over 2000 years old. They had the perfect environment to make The Ultimate Food Cow and by god they did it. I can respect that.
So, take that, drag it across an ocean to a place that does NOT have polders, and add the rapid enshittification of capitalism to it. BAM you've got a fucking holstein.
There is ONE goal for "improving" the holstein. Make More Milk. As long as the black and white milkbag leaks enough, nothing else matters. Health? Fertility? Feed ratio? Ability to not die of infection? WHO CARES. MILK LINE GO UP.
Over 90% of holsteins are inbred to start with, because Milk Line Go Up. To the tune of having an average COI of 8%-- where extreme negative effects (think Hapsburgs) start to crop up around 10%
Holstein bulls are aggressive bastards (many dairy bulls are), so no one wants to keep intact males in their herds, meaning most cows are artificially inseminated
Not being limited by the natural lifespan of a living bull means that the same stud can keep having direct offspring for decades after his death
Toystory the bull had 500,000 calves before he died, and hit over 1 million offspring in 2015. That's ONE animal and to put this in perspective, there are 9 million holsteins in the US.
DON'T WORRY IT GETS WORSE
Not only can 99% of holsteins be traced back to just two bulls-- 99% of male holsteins share one of two exact Y chromosomes with those two bulls.
The gene pool is so small that it's equivalent to about 60 individuals. Warrior Cat allegiances are larger than that. That's barely bigger than modern ThunderClan.
"Massive lack of genetic diversity" does not begin to capture the existential dread of this situation. Mark my words, WATCH, when the Bird Flu finally mutates a strain that rips through a mammalian population, it's gonna be in the USA and it's going to be through our dairy cattle.
This is not prophecy or me laying a curse on the land, this is the natural consequence of basing the stability of US milk production on the equivalent of 9 million clones of two classrooms worth of individuals, and then packing them in close quarters
And we don't have to wait for doomsday for the impacts to be apparent on the cattle themelves
Holstein fertility has also dropped by half since the 1960s when the intensive inbreeding really kicked into high gear
Because their whole body is dedicating all of their resources to milk production, they have a notoriously "bony" frame.
Show judges, however, like this because they think that's a very "feminine" look for a 1600 pound ruminant. Very normal thing to think.
Like. I don't know if i can communicate this to people who don't look at cows a lot (it's not quite as obviously dramatic as a pug skull) but here is a comparison of an "ideal" show holstein and an "unselected" holstein from a herd that's been established as a sort of "control group" for what they looked like back in the 1960s;
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/7dde979413cb37d913ecbaaeca5f3887/39655bf41b765d75-ba/s540x810/d380e3f6248926622e6b7d31ca2495aa2c9564bc.jpg)
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The way that the artery on the "modern" cow's belly runs to the udder like a big pink worm freaks me out the most ngl
The udder also bulges out from between the back legs
The show cow is so thin
And then compare these both to a Holstein-Frisian cross who leans more on the Frisian side;
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/8d945437682f231fd2ff2a57729648ae/39655bf41b765d75-2c/s540x810/56a6deefc60da98c38fb32cc30b779f44be3384f.jpg)
Proper weight, developed legs. Its biggest "problem" is actually just the udder shape-- deep udders, which "hang" low like that, aren't optimal for milk-focused breeds because the higher away from the ground the less chance there is of infection. In that department, the "unselected" holstein clearly outclasses the holstein-frisian.
But it probably won't be surprising to hear that the "show holstein," with its massive, swollen udder, is SUPER prone to infections such as mastitis.
But it is also just more prone to getting sick generally
And, to keep up with these insane demands, holsteins need a TON of food. You aren't going to just turn these things out into a pasture and be done with it. Even its ancestor the Frisian needed premium Dutch polder grass to be such a good cow-- crank that up to 11 with these Monuments to Humanity's Hubrice
The Texas Longhorn developed in semi-feral conditions and can eat a bush to become the best thing in a 10 mile radius. The Scottish Highland was iron-forged in upland moors with a steady diet of turf and rain.
Meanwhile if a Holstein has less than 5 homemade meals a day without poland spring bottled water it will die to death.
And the WORST part? You have to use these if you want to make money in dairy farming. It's WAAY too expensive to just run a suboptimal farm. Their milk isn't great, but they sure do make a lot of it.
...so Holsteins and Holstein-Frisians (and other "super efficient" breeds) have absolutely decimated heritage cattle. The American Milking Devon is a deep reddish brown with gorgeous horns and low maintenance; rare. Randall Linebacks are painted with lines of white speckles down the back and can be used for any purpose; critically endangered. The Niata was a pug-faced cow who could fight jaguars; extinct.
And THAT'S what makes me hate them most of all. I LOVE cows, but whenever I see a reference to one, it's a holstein. It's always boring black and white splotches with big pink udders. They're practically synonymous with "cow" when their homogeniety is actually hiding much cooler breeds from you.
Did you know cows can be tiger-striped?
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/9dbb892e3b985939c9b1c320cc742c17/39655bf41b765d75-9a/s540x810/7557a98abf245b3198daa03835ec547a0c9dfb65.jpg)
And that England has its own type of longhorn?
Or that cow horns can twist upwards like an antelope?
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/91657f6e42b50d3becd3c7143696055d/39655bf41b765d75-88/s500x750/b265e347445b750ef0c3c3a7a20733b43c1da111.jpg)
And that they can have REALLY LONG ears?
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/0d4c94c91e9528b02e00c824cc3145c2/39655bf41b765d75-54/s540x810/dff4a409839cfdb8b274ee5675ff41bd93e955bf.jpg)
And that they can be blue?
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/20f31e503c3f0c56e6f6d5c5c7bd3220/39655bf41b765d75-2b/s540x810/8ee8e36311f0376a5df5cc112f7c4e8cd08efa7b.jpg)
And that's not even getting into some of the cows that have gotten a small crumb of attention lately, such as Highlands, Ankole-Watusi, and Texas Longhorns. There's so many cool cows out there! And they're all really different from holsteins! MOST of them are also a lot healthier and produce tastier milk and meat!
TL;DR yeah i don't like holsteins and I like sniping at them. For reasons both legit and petty.
#Not wc#Cows#Yeens and cows are my favorite animals btw#Cows my beloved#Again kinda interesting it just never really came up until now? But this is a cat blog I suppose#But yeah cows are one of my special interests and have been for like... 10 years now
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Apology Accepted - Garrick Tavis
Summary: Garrick and you got off on the wrong foot from day one. But maybe things could have been different if you'd just given him a chance. And somehow all it takes is for you to be stood up on Valentines Day. A/N: Just a small Valentine's Day fic for you all to enjoy ❤️ Masterlist | Links
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“You excited for tonight?” Bodhi asks as he takes his across from me in the dining hall for lunch.
“What’s tonight?” Imogen asks, joining our conversation as Quinn gets up to join her girlfriend who just walked in.
“Y/N here has scored herself a valentines date for tonight.” Bodhi announces before I can get a word in.
A loud scoff has us all turning out heads towards the noise, Garrick having turned his attention to us. “You have a date? How much did you pay them?” He mocks with that stupid smirk of his, and that damn dimple in his cheek fully noticeable.
I roll my eyes at him and turn my head away. “I didn’t pay them anything, doubt I can say the same for you though.” I snap back, Bodhi and Imogen snickering at my comment as Garrick scowls at me.
“So do you have a valentine's date or plans then Garrick?” Imogen asks him, a knowing smirk on her face.
“I don’t need a day to tell me to do something romantic.” He grumbles.
“So that's a fat no.” I add, knowing if I turn my head he will be glaring at me.
“I doubt you two have any plans.” He shoots at Imogen and Bodhi, ignoring my comment.
“I’m doing a girls night with Quinn and her girlfriend.” Imogen says happily.
“So you’re third wheeling?” Bodhi teases, earning a bread roll being thrown at his head.
“Says the one whose plans were to hang out with Y/N here till she got a date.”
“Hey, those are perfectly valid plans for two very single friends.” Bodhi exclaims.
“And how did those plans turn out for you?” Garrick teases, causing Bodhi to sulk and ignore Garrick.
The tavern in town is packed with people tonight. Probably because it’s the only place nearby to go out for a drink or a meal. Meaning a lot of cadets and other people have chosen to come here tonight. I scan the room again, looking out for the infantry cadet who has asked me out. But yet again I come up short, only finding other happy couples enjoying their evening. Maybe Garrick was right and I should have paid for them to come on the date. maybe then I wouldn’t have been stood up. I throw back my drink, skulling the last of it. I put the mug down, shoving it away from me as I turn to get up from my table as a familiar large figure sits on the edge of the seat next to me, blocking my exit from the booth.
“So you teased me all of today about not having plans and being single, just for you to get stood up?” He teases as he cocks an eyebrow at me.
I roll my eyes at him. “If you’re here to gloat then save it and move out of my way.”
He ignores my command to move, looking down at me with those damned hazel eyes. Fuck, I hated what those eyes did to me. Hated what he did to me.
“Move over.” He tells me as he forces himself closer to me, making me move further into the booth to accommodate him. “You’re lucky I’m hungry.”
“How does that make me lucky?” I ask him as he waves down one of the servers.
He ignores me as he orders food for both of us, not even stopping to ask what I want, but annoyingly he somehow nails exactly what I want. The same thing I always get when I come here.
“You’re lucky, because now it doesn’t look like you’ve been stood up.” He tells me as he shoves a drink towards me, one he must have ordered before sitting down. “And you get to enjoy my company.”
“There’s nothing about your company to enjoy.” I snarl, taking the drink he offers me as I take a deep drink from it.
“I beg to differ.” He says smugly as he smiles at me, that damn dimple poping again.
“We’ve known each other for two years now Tavis, I think I’d know by now if there was anything to enjoy about your company. Which there isn’t.”
His eyes travel over me, making me squirm under his gaze. I hated when he did that. It’s like he knew how I really felt. That my feelings towards him had changed over the time we’d known each other. But I was too stubborn to admit it to him, knowing he’d just tease me relentlessly.
“You’ve never really given me a chance love.” He tells me as if he’s stating the obvious.
Our conversation is briefly halted by our food arriving, Garrick pushing the plate of roast chicken, mash potatoes and gravy towards me as he turns his attention to his steak.
“Why would I? You made it painfully clear you didn’t like me from day one.” I tell him pointedly.
He shakes his head as he chews his food. “No, you just took something I said the wrong way. I never disliked you.”
What? No, there’s no way. I remember that day. The comment he had made.
“If that's true, why have you let it carry on for the last two years?” I ask, turning to face him in the booth.
He turns his head, giving me his full attention. “Because you were hell bent on the idea I didn’t like you. Trust me, I tried to make it clear I didn’t hate you. You didn’t want a bar of it. Now eat the food I ordered you before it goes cold.” Gesturing to my plate dismissively as he turns back to his own food.
I turn back to the food, but suddenly I’m not hungry. Garrick’s words playing over in my head. Had I really been the reason this had carried out the way it had for the last two years? No, I knew Garrick. If he had wanted to be friends or change the outcome of that day he would have. Right?
“Maybe he did and you were too stubborn to see things differently.” My dragon drawls in my head.
“I don’t need your input right now.” I snap back at them.
I feel the huff of annoyance through the bond. “Clearly you do. So either remain stubborn and continue as you are, or listen to the damn boy. Might do you some good too. With how wound up you’ve been over him, you need a release.”
I slam up my shields, not wanting to deal with them right now. But I don’t miss the laughter from them before I do. But they were right. I had just thought Garrick was trying to be annoying. Lure me into a false sense of friendship after the comment he’d made. But looking back, I definitely could have taken it the wrong way. I’d just jumped at it. And now after two years, and knowing Garrick a lot better than I did… It would have been clear he didn’t mean it seriously. Fuck.
“I’m sorry.” I mumble, not expecting Garrick to hear it as I push a stray bit of chicken around my plate.
I know Garrick hears it clear as day as he turns his head towards me, feeling his eyes on me as he watches me. “What was that?” He asks, hearing the smirk in his voice already.
“I’m sorry.” I say a little louder this time.
Garrick turns in his seat, resting his arm along the back of the booth while the other pushes his plate away as he leans it on the edge of the table. “Sorry, I don’t think I understood what you sa-“
“I said I’m sorry!” I nearly yell at him as I drop my fork to my plate as he chuckles at me.
Instead of the smirk I expect to see, it’s a genuine smile. It’s something rare to see on Garrick. I’d only seen it a handful of times, mainly kept for moments to do with Bodhi or Xaden when he thinks no one is watching.
“Apology accepted. Now let’s get you another drink and make this a proper valentine’s date.” He says as he stands from the booth, taking both our mugs with him to the bar.
#fourth wing#fourth wing fanfic#the fourth wing#garrick tavis#fourth wing imagine#the empyrean#garrick tavis imagine#garrick tavis x reader#fourth wing x reader
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NO TIP?
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/f24453f6962ea7fdcb647d284fdcc166/b94a43db789220ae-b1/s540x810/c6da035b07bb978e006da9d7f73b79db804f6a0b.jpg)
pairing — racer!jeno x reader w - noncon, misogyny, g - dark, smut | masterlist
summary — you had been working on a new paint job for a pretty well known racers car. when he comes in to pick it up and you tell him it won’t be done until tomorrow, he switches gears and starts being a total asshole. you tell him to just get out, but he makes sure to give you a tip before he goes.
a/n — hencheri got this stuck in my head after this and this specific post, so i had to make something about this
you’d been working on a paint job for a pretty well known racers car for a couple days now. you think the guys name was jeno? you worked at a car shop but you didn’t keep up with that type of stuff. you hadn’t actually met him, but you were the one who’s been doing all the paint work for him. a new shiny coat on his expensive car for his show. you’d kill to have a car like this, it was nice as fuck.
you heard the door open and you realized it was probably him. you forgot that you hadn’t called to let him know that it’d be another day as the car needed some more time to dry. you fully prepare yourself for him to be a little angry, but you could’ve never prepared yourself for what he’d do instead of throwing a few snarky remarks at you. he walks up to your counter and eyes you up and down with an almost confused look on his face before he looks back at his car and turns back around to face you.
“i’m here to pick that up. should be under the name jeno.”
you cough before biting the inside of your cheek preparing for an outburst of some sort.
“sorry sir, it should be fully dried by tomorrow. it’s still a bit tacky.”
you swear he gave you a dirty look, but whatever, it was better than him screaming at you. you couldn’t speed up how fast a car could dry. if you could, you would, it’d make your job a lot easier.
“are you the one working on my car?”
“uhm, yes?”
he scoffs before looking back over at his car once again. he mumbled a “no fucking way…” under his breath and you just rolled your eyes before turning around to reach something hanging on the wall behind the counter.
“so then you wouldn’t know if it’s done or not.”
you still for a second and laugh slightly under your breath before you turn back to face him. what the hell was he talking about?
“sir, i worked on it, therefore i know that it’s done…even if i hadn’t painted your car, which i did, it’s pretty obvious to anybody that your car isn’t done. you can go touch it if you want, it’s still sticky to the touch.”
you hadn’t meant for it to come out with such attitude, but he was literally doing the same thing to you. you knew he was a racer or some shit but that doesn’t mean you should just bow down to him.
“i hope you’re not expecting a tip.”
seriously? he probably makes thousands a month and he can’t spare you a fucking tip? look at that nice ass paint job you just did. a gorgeous bright red, and it’d look even better when it was completely dry and shiny. you just ignore his comment and move over to him at the register.
“cash or card?”
he just slams the cash on the table without making a sound and you go to count it before he opens his mouth for yet another snarky remark.
“you really think i didn’t give you enough? you think i don’t got enough money, huh?”
you have to hold back from giving him a dirty look which was insanely hard by the way, and you’re sure you gave him some sort of look anyways because he made sure to give you a nasty look right after you had felt your eyebrows scrunch together at him.
“i have to count, sir. it’s got nothing to do with my personal beliefs. despite you not tipping..”
he slams his hand on the counter and you knew he had heard you.
“so, what? you’re just some greedy bitch who’s tryna empty out my pockets?”
you would have just told him to take the car and go but it’d literally be done by tomorrow and he already gave you the cash and you knew with his status that it’d be made into some huge deal. you put the money into the register and step back before placing your hands against your hips.
“excuse me? you can leave. you can pick up your car tomorrow since you already paid. unless you’ve got anymore questions, you can see yourself out.”
he looks down at the counter for a second before you see his fingers start to grip against the glass.
“i’ve got a few questions actually, ma’am.”
he takes a step towards the entrance of the counter.
“how long you been working here?”
he doesn’t give you a chance to answer before he take another step towards the opening to enter behind the counter.
“you’re a woman, what makes you think you have any business working here?”
he’s standing right at the opening to the counter now and you open your mouth but a small sound only gets the chance to slip out before he cuts you off again.
“you want a tip so bad, right?”
he’s takes his last step and is now fully behind the counter, standing right in front of you and staring you down intensely. you take a small step back and he quickly grabs your shoulder, his finger nails digging deeply into it.
“so why don’t i fucking give you one.”
he immediately turns you over by your shoulder and presses you against his back, wrapping a hand around your waist so you couldn’t get away from him. the place was empty, you were meant to close up tonight. you didn’t know what the hell he wanted. he literally just paid you the exact cash you needed, no way it was a robbery. you curse at him to let you go but he pulls you from behind the counter and over towards his car. he feels you up on the way there, forcing a hand into your pants and attempting to finger you, and that’s when you realized what he wanted and what was going to happen.
finally, you let out at least five screams before he slams a hand over your mouth. you were standing in front of the hood of his car now and you could feel his boner poking you right in the ass.
he continued to shove his fingers into you mercilessly and pulling out every few seconds to add a weak attempt at providing your clit attention. you stomp on his foot and he lets out a pained sound and a “you fucking bitch” before he pulls his hand out of your pants and shoves you onto the still tacky sticky hood of his car. you put your hands onto the side of the hood to push yourself up but he quickly presses his hand against your back to hold you down. you try to swing your arms back at him, hoping to hit something, but it does nothing, obviously. his other hand is still tight on your face and it’s threatening to slide up and cover your nose.
“what’s up with you uptight bitches, huh? thought you wanted a tip? i’d say fucking with a racer is a pretty big tip, right?”
he pushes your pants down along with your panties before you hear a belt from behind you and your pathetic squirms below him get more intense and reckless.
“you wanna be a bitch, right? i’ll treat you like a bitch then.”
and right then, he pushes his dick right in you. no easing, no stopping, he just goes right into you and immediately starts thrusting. you start to whine underneath him and you move your feet up from the floor hoping to hit him, but he just steals your idea and kicks you right in the back of your calf, hard. you immediately scream into his palm and feel like you’re sinking deeper into his car. you just lie there for a little, breathing heavy and you move your eyes up slowly and through his windshield you’re able get a slight look at the situation. you felt disgusting. you could see the sweat sticking to his face, his bangs bouncing with every relentless movement. and from how much you were sticking to the car, your body barely even moved from all the thrusts he was making. all you heard was the slight creakiness and bouncing of the car and his grunts and shitty moans. you hated him.
“you feel how big this tip is slut? wanna complain like a stripper not gettin’ enough money.”
he leans down into your ear and his thrusts suddenly quicken like a machine.
“maybe this’ll teach you not to take men’s jobs. what’s a woman like you even doing in an area like this?”
you whine against the palm of his hand and you just shake your head no. not at anything he said in particular, but just the whole situation. you try to mumble a few ‘stops’ underneath his palm, and you know that he hears them. you know he understands you don’t want this, but why the fuck would he care? was this really all because you were working at a job predominantly done by men…? seriously? when you feel yourself squeeze around him and hear him laugh, you feel absolutely disgusted with yourself and your body. your pussy was getting wetter and wetter, finally making noises everytime that his balls slapped against it. you get frustrated and you start sobbing angrily into his palm, stomping like a child against the floor. you would kick him again, but you knew the next time he kicked you right back, it’d be ten times worse than the first time. and so what if you managed to kick him off of you anyway? you wouldn’t get that far. he was ten times bigger than you and with your pants halfway down your legs, you’d trip over your own feet before you could even get one step in. the only thing you could do was wait until he was finished.
when you feel his fingernails squeeze into your back and feel something leak down your legs, you know exactly what it is and just pray that that’s enough and that this is all over. and when you hear the fabric of his pants brush against his legs and his belt clasp, your hopes have been fulfilled. or at least that’s what you thought. he didn’t release the palm that was on your mouth, only having moved his hand off of your back, now giving you more room to squirm. but he doesn’t let you get up. he moves the palm from your mouth to your head, pressing your cheek into the car and you can only yell so much in a position like that.
“get off of me! take your car and just go!”
you hear him scoff from behind you and you feel him circle his fingers on your clit before sliding them alllll the way down your slit until finally pushing them into your embarrassingly wet hole.
“you’d think after all that you’d get rid of that bitchy fukin’ attitude.”
he continues to finger you but once you feel him push a third finger in, you have to stop a moan from slipping. you try to move your hands up the car to create as much distance as you could between you and him. it became painful to do so as the paint had started to dry to your hands, but you continued anyways. but it wasn’t doing anything though, his fingers only follow you.
“we’re gonna stay here until you stop your bitching.”
and that’s when he slips a fourth finger in and you can feel yourself clench, and this time your body doesn’t let go, holding onto his fingers for dear life and he lets out a sick laugh. the moment you can tell that you’re about to cum all over his fingers, you try to push yourself up the car even more, becoming desperate, but it only encourages him to play with your clit as well now and he pushes your face harder against the car.
“i’m sorry—i’m sorry! okay? you can have the car for free—please!”
he scoffs and ignores your whining and continues to thrust his fingers into you. you became desperate, okay? what more could you do besides beg him to stop? he didn’t like your attitude? okay then, maybe your begging for mercy would detour him! but that’s not what he wanted. he wanted to strip you of any confidence and pride that you once had. he wanted to absolutely humiliate you. and when he saw you finish all over his fingers, he knew that had had. he immediately pulls his fingers out and he slaps your ass while laughing before moving back and you can hear him fumbling with something. you quickly push yourself up off of his car and it feels as if the skin is about to be ripped off of your face, but luckily, none comes off. when you finally free your face from the car hood, you’re met with a sight that would forever be engraved in your mind. your face print was totally embedded into his car. your hand prints littered it as well, and although your work top prevented a perfect outline, your chest was imprinted on there as well.
you quickly pull up your pants and go to move back but he quickly walks up beside you and throws an arm into your shoulder before looking down at you.
“it looks good doesn’t it?”
you just stare at it in disgust and he throws his shoulder off of you before taking a step back, grabbing his wallet and reaching in it before throwing a couple sorry ass twenty dollar bills at you like you were some stripper and a white strip of paper that lands on the car. you pick it up and realize it was a ticket to one of his shitty racing shows.
“you’re lucky i’m giving you one for free, front row too. better see you there, i want you to see my awesome new car design in action.”
he points to the prints on his car and you snap your head up to him, face wet with tears and painted with concern. you didn’t want to keep that shit on his car. so what if people didn’t know that the face print was yours? that’s humiliating as fuck! he squats down to your level as if you were a child and throws a hand onto your arm, squeezing it threateningly.
“if those prints aren’t still there by the time i pick it up tomorrow, i can assure you that you’ll see me again.”
he straightens his knees again, menacingly looking down at you before slowly removing his hand from your arm, dragging out every second before his hand finally drops and he simply just walks away. you just stand there stunned, money surrounding you and his car staring you dead in your face.
you turn to your side to get one last look at it. what were you supposed to tell your boss about what the hell that was? you can see yourself once again in the reflection of the windshield, your face has red paint all on its side and your hair is sticking up in a million different places, bits of paint stuck in it as well. a million showers would never be able to wash away what happened tonight, and a crummy hundred dollar tip didn’t make up for it either.
you stare the money dead in the face and let your tears drip onto the numbers printed on the paper. you’d be thankful if you never got a tip from somebody ever again.
#tw noncon#nct smut#nct x reader#jeno x reader#jeno smut#lee jeno smut#lee jeno x reader#nct dream x reader#nct dream smut#dark nct x reader#dark nct#dark jeno#dark jeno x reader#yandere nct#yandere nct x reader#yandere jeno#yandere jeno x reader
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the bet | sirius black
pairing: sirius black x reader
summary: james bets sirius can't make you fall in love with him and now sirius is all over you.
masterlist
It started, like most ridiculous things in Sirius Black’s life, because of James Potter.
The Gryffindor common room was loud that evening, filled with students playing Wizard’s Chess, finishing last-minute essays, or just causing trouble. Sirius lounged on the couch, legs stretched over the armrest, twirling his wand between his fingers as he half-listened to James and Peter argue about Quidditch formations.
And then you laughed.
Not at him—though that wouldn’t have been surprising—but across the room, sitting with Marlene and Lily, head thrown back, eyes sparkling with mischief. Sirius had heard you laugh plenty of times, but for some reason, this one caught his attention. Maybe it was because of how easily you laughed, how effortlessly you filled the space around you with warmth and energy.
James, ever perceptive (and ever annoying), caught the way Sirius was looking at you and smirked.
“Mate,” he said, nudging Sirius’s boot off the couch. “You’re staring.”
Sirius rolled his eyes and sat up properly. “Please. I don’t stare—people hope I’ll stare.”
Peter snorted. “Yeah, alright.”
James leaned back in his chair, a knowing glint in his eyes. “You know,” he mused, “I don’t think Y/n ever actually fallen for your charms.”
Sirius scoffed, placing a hand on his chest like he’d just been gravely insulted. “Excuse me?”
“I mean, she flirts with you,” James continued, as if this wasn’t a direct attack on Sirius’s entire identity, “but she flirts with everyone. She’s probably the only girl at Hogwarts who hasn’t fallen for your act.”
Sirius narrowed his eyes, turning his attention back to you. You were a flirt—always had been. And you were good at it too, quick-witted and confident, never the type to get flustered. He’d flirted with you plenty of times, and you always matched him, grin for grin, quip for quip. But James was right—you never blushed, never got nervous, never gave him that look most girls did when he turned on the charm.
It was… interesting.
And Sirius Black loved a challenge.
“You’re saying,” Sirius said slowly, “that if I actually tried, she wouldn’t fall for me?”
James grinned. “I’m saying you can’t do it.”
Remus, who had been reading by the fire (and wisely staying out of this nonsense), sighed. “Here we go.”
Peter perked up. “Ooh, is this a bet?”
Sirius smirked. “It is now.”
James sat up straighter, eyes gleaming. “Alright then, Black. Let’s make it official. I bet you—” he paused for effect, “—ten Galleons that you can’t make her fall for you.”
Sirius raised a brow. “Ten? That’s all?”
James laughed. “Alright, big shot, fifteen.”
“Twenty.”
“You want to lose money that badly?”
Sirius leaned forward, resting his elbows on his knees, expression downright smug. “Oh, I never lose.”
Remus groaned. “This is a terrible idea.”
James ignored him. “Alright, fine. Twenty Galleons says she will never fall for you.”
Sirius held out a hand. James shook it. The deal was made.
Peter clapped his hands together. “Ooooh, this is gonna be fun.”
Remus muttered, “This is going to end in disaster.”
Sirius leaned back, stretching lazily, confidence radiating off him. “Just you lot wait. By the end of the month, she will be smitten.”
“Sure, mate,” James said, shaking his head. “Sure.”
Across the room, you turned slightly, catching Sirius’s gaze. Your eyes met his, and instead of looking away, you held his stare, tilting your head slightly as if daring him to make a move.
And just to be infuriating, you gave him a wink.
Sirius grinned.
This was going to be fun.
The game begins
Sirius Black was a man on a mission.
The very next morning, he strolled into the Great Hall like he owned the place—not an uncommon occurrence. But today, his target wasn’t just looking devastatingly handsome or stealing toast off James’s plate. No, today was about you.
You were sitting with Marlene and Lily, sipping your coffee and looking far too amused for someone who had barely started the day. The moment Sirius approached, Marlene smirked knowingly.
“Uh-oh,” she muttered. “Brace yourself.”
You looked up just as Sirius slid into the seat beside you, his signature smirk firmly in place. “Morning, love,” he drawled, reaching out and plucking a piece of bacon from your plate.
You raised an eyebrow but let him take it. “Flirting before I’ve had my coffee? Bold move, Black.”
Sirius grinned. “I figured I should start early. Give you the whole day to think about how devastatingly charming I am.”
You took a slow sip of coffee, holding eye contact. Then, deadpan: “Who are you again?”
Marlene cackled.
Lily snorted into her pumpkin juice.
But Sirius? He only grinned wider. “Ah, playing hard to get, are we? Don’t worry, love. I love a challenge.”
You tilted your head, smirking. “Do you, now?”
Sirius leaned in ever so slightly. “Mmm. And something tells me you do too.”
You pretended to consider this. “That’s true. But here’s the thing—I’m very good at it.”
Sirius chuckled. Oh, this is going to be interesting.
Since then, it was suspicious how often Sirius Black seemed to run into you that week.
He was always around, flirting, teasing, and honestly just trying to get your attention somehow. It was becoming a very odd habit to be around him that much.
It's been a few days now, and it seemed Sirius wasn't going to back down on whatever the plan he had in his head.
Try harder.
The Hogwarts library was your sanctuary. A place of peace, quiet, and most importantly, a place without distractions. Better saying, a place without Sirius Black.
At least, that was the idea.
Because of course, when you were finally alone, enjoying the rare bliss of uninterrupted reading, a shadow loomed over your book, and with it, his voice.
“Fancy seeing you here.”
You sighed without looking up. “This is a library, Sirius. People come here to study.”
Sirius Black had a very particular way of invading one’s personal space. Instead of just standing in front of your table like a normal person, he leaned forward, resting his elbows against the wood, close enough that you could feel the warmth of him.
“Yes, well,” he mused, “I figured you might be lonely.”
You finally lifted your gaze, unimpressed. “Oh, how thoughtful. And totally not an excuse to bother me.”
Sirius let out a dramatic gasp, clutching his chest like you had physically harmed him. “You wound me.”
You smirked. “Not yet, but if you keep talking, I might.”
His grin widened. “Feisty. I like it.”
“You like everything.”
“No, just you.”
You rolled your eyes, but you were smiling.
Sirius noticed.
He noticed everything.
And like the menace he was, he took that as an invitation.
With a lazy confidence that only he could pull off, he slid into the chair across from you, propping his chin on one hand. “So, what are we reading today?”
We. As if he was included in this activity.
You sighed, snapping your book shut with an audible thud. “Sirius, don’t you have somewhere else to be? Like, I don’t know, bothering James? Tormenting Snape? Staring at yourself in a mirror?”
“Multitasking, love.” He winked. “Besides, I like this game much better.”
You raised an eyebrow. “What game?”
“The one where I try to get you to fall for me.” He smirked. “And you pretend you’re not already madly in love.”
You let out a short laugh. “Oh, that’s what this is?”
Sirius tapped his fingers against the table. “Mmm, seems that way, doesn’t it?”
You leaned forward slightly, resting your arms on the wood between you. “I hate to break it to you, Black, but if this is your grand seduction plan, I’d give it a solid four out of ten.”
Sirius clutched his heart again, even more dramatically than before. “Four?! That’s a crime.”
“Would’ve been a three, but I added an extra point for effort.”
He narrowed his eyes, studying you. “You’re toying with me.”
You smirked. “What gave it away?”
Sirius huffed, but the grin never left his lips. He leaned back in his chair, crossing his arms as he examined you. His eyes flickered between yours, as if searching for a weak spot.
Then, he smiled.
That slow, dangerous, oh no kind of smile.
“Alright, then,” he mused, tilting his head. “I’ll just have to try harder.”
You arched an eyebrow. “That sounds suspiciously like a challenge.”
“Maybe it is.”
Your fingers tapped against your book thoughtfully. “So what happens if you lose?”
Sirius grinned. “I never lose.”
You leaned in slightly, dropping your voice to a whisper. “Sounds like someone’s overconfident.”
Sirius mirrored your movement, his voice dropping to match yours. “Sounds like someone’s tempted.”
You held his gaze for a long, tense moment, a silent battle of wills.
Determined not to let him win this round, you leaned in too, mirroring his movement, until your faces were barely inches apart.
“You know what, Sirius?” you whispered.
His smirk widened. “What, love?”
You reached forward, grabbed your book—and snapped it shut in his face.
Sirius jerked back, startled, blinking rapidly.
“Merlin’s bloody beard, woman!” Sirius exclaimed, rubbing his forehead. “That was uncalled for!”
You leaned back in your chair, casually flipping your book open again. “No, invading my personal space was uncalled for.”
Sirius groaned dramatically, slumping in his chair. “You are absolutely infuriating.”
“You love it,” you said sweetly.
Sirius huffed, but there was no mistaking the way his lips curled up. “One day, sweetheart,” he said, voice low and full of promise. “One day, you’re going to beg me to kiss you.”
You scoffed, flipping a page. “Highly unlikely.”
Sirius just smirked, standing up and giving you a mock salute. “We’ll see.”
And with that, he turned and sauntered out of the library, leaving you staring after him, suddenly very aware of the warmth lingering on your face.
The retaliation.
It's been weeks now.
Weeks.
And Sirius was still all over you.
At this point, it was clear that Sirius Black had declared war.
Your response to that? Oh, he had no idea who he was messing with.
Because if Sirius Black wanted to play this game, you were going to make damn sure he suffered for it.
So, the next time you saw him in the corridor—leaning lazily against the wall, that insufferable grin already in place—you stopped, tilted your head, and gave him a slow, deliberate once-over.
Sirius blinked, caught slightly off guard. But only for a second.
Then, he smirked, straightening up. “See something you like, sweetheart?”
You let the silence drag out, letting his own arrogance build up. Then, just as his smirk widened—
You hummed, tapping your chin. “Hmm. Almost.”
Then, with a slow, infuriatingly confident wink, you turned on your heel and walked away.
Sirius stood frozen in place.
For a solid ten seconds.
You could feel his confusion radiating behind you, the absolute whiplash of thinking he had the upper hand, only to be completely blindsided.
James, who had just walked up behind Sirius, witnessed the entire thing. He clapped Sirius on the back with a grin. “Mate.”
Sirius didn’t even turn.
James smirked. “I think you just got Sirius’d.”
Sirius finally blinked, coming back to himself. He turned to James, looking betrayed. “That—that’s not a thing.”
James snorted. “It definitely is now.”
Sirius turned back toward the hallway you had disappeared down, running a hand through his hair, still processing.
You almost felt bad for him.
Almost.
But then you heard his voice, muttering to himself as you rounded the corner—
“Bloody hell.”
And that?
That was exactly the reaction you wanted.
The shift.
The Gryffindor common room was warm with the crackling fire, but the corridors leading to it were anything but. The stone walls seemed to absorb every bit of warmth, leaving you slightly chilled as you walked back from the Prefect’s meeting. It had run longer than expected—something about Filch catching a group of first-years trying to hex Mrs. Norris (which, honestly, you would have given them extra House points for).
As you turned the last corner, you spotted him.
Sirius Black, leaning against the wall right outside the common room entrance, looking for all the world like he was posing for a magazine cover. His arms were crossed over his chest, one foot propped against the stone, his black hair perfectly tousled in that effortlessly charming way that drove half the school mad.
You raised an eyebrow. “Are you seriously waiting for me?”
Sirius smirked. “What makes you think I wasn’t just casually standing here, looking incredibly handsome?”
You sighed, exasperated but amused. “Because you’re Sirius Black. And Sirius Black doesn’t do casual.”
Sirius pushed off the wall, stepping in front of you, blocking your way into the common room. “Guilty as charged,” he admitted. “Though, in my defense, you do make it very hard to resist waiting around just to see you.”
You tilted your head, smirking. “That was almost sweet.”
He grinned. “Almost?”
“Yes, almost. But then I remembered you say this kind of thing to everyone.”
Sirius gasped dramatically. “Now that’s just slander. I’d never be this dedicated to anyone else.”
“Oh, dedicated now, are we?” you teased.
He stepped closer, closing some of the space between you, his smirk never fading. “You have noticed, haven’t you?”
Your smirk mirrored his, refusing to back down. “Oh, I’ve noticed.” You leaned in just a fraction. “I just don’t think it’s working.”
Sirius let out a soft laugh, but there was something in his expression—something unreadable, something a little too amused, a little too confident. “Oh, love,” he murmured, voice lower now, teasing but laced with something else. “You say that like you’re not enjoying every second of it.”
Your breath caught—just for a moment.
Not because he was right (which he wasn’t, obviously), but because of how close he suddenly was. The playful flirting had been going on for weeks now, but this? This was new.
You weren’t about to let him win, though.
With slow deliberation, you reached up and threaded your fingers through his hair, twirling a loose strand between your fingers. “Lovely hair,” you mused, watching his expression closely. “Shame if someone—oh, I don’t know—hexed it green.”
Sirius stilled.
It was brief, barely a second, but you felt it—the way his breath hitched just slightly, the way his smirk faltered for half a heartbeat before he recovered.
Then, he exhaled a soft laugh. “You wouldn’t dare.”
You grinned. “Try me.”
Sirius blinked, clearly caught off guard.
Then, he laughed. A real, genuine laugh, not his usual smug chuckle. “Merlin, you really are something else.”
You grinned. “Took you this long to realize?”
Sirius shook his head, still grinning. “I should be winning this, you know.”
You smirked. “Oh, you think you’re winning?”
He chuckled. “I know I am.”
“Sure, Black. Keep telling yourself that.”
His grey eyes flickered with something unreadable before he suddenly leaned in, just enough to make your heart stutter—not quite touching, but close enough that you could feel the warmth radiating off him.
His voice dropped to a murmur. “You love this.”
For the first time since this ridiculous game had started, you felt your heart stutter—just for a second. He was so close, his voice quieter than usual, like this moment wasn’t just another round of flirting.
You kept your cool, refusing to step back. “Of course I do,” you whispered. “I love watching you try so hard.”
His smirk widened. “Oh, darling. I’m not even trying yet.”
That was it. That was the moment you felt it.
The shift.
You weren’t sure who moved first. Maybe it was him, leaning in just enough to blur the lines of your usual banter. Maybe it was you, tilting your head slightly, eyes locked with his, breath caught somewhere between another teasing remark and something… else.
Whatever it was, the air between you shifted.
Sirius had been relentless these past few weeks, flirting with you at every opportunity, always pushing, always testing. But you had been just as ruthless—flirting back, laughing at his attempts, making sure he never got the reaction he was aiming for. It was a game, a fun one, a ridiculous one.
But now?
Now, you weren’t entirely sure what it was anymore.
You still had your fingers in his hair, twirling a strand between them as if you weren’t hyper-aware of the way he was looking at you. Sirius wasn’t just smirking now—his usual cocky, easy-going expression had melted into something slower, something almost… amused. Like he was watching you figure something out in real time.
His voice was soft, but there was no missing the amusement in it. “You’re staring, love.”
You scoffed, shaking off whatever that moment was. “So are you.”
“Course I am.” He grinned, tilting his head. “You are stunning.”
You rolled your eyes, letting go of his hair and taking a small step back—just enough to clear your head. “You’re insufferable.”
Sirius grinned. “And yet, here you are, still standing in front of me. Fascinating.”
You huffed a laugh. “I’m only here because you’re blocking the entrance.”
“Oh?” He glanced behind him, at the portrait hole, then back at you. “Say please, and I might move.”
You raised an eyebrow. “I’d rather hex you.”
Sirius gasped dramatically, placing a hand over his chest. “Violence? So soon in our courtship?”
You groaned, shoving his shoulder lightly. “Move, Black.”
He grinned but didn’t budge. Instead, he leaned slightly closer again, grey eyes twinkling with mischief. “Admit it.”
You crossed your arms. “Admit what?”
“That I make your heart race.”
You blinked. Oh, he was getting bold now.
You tilted your head, pretending to consider. “Hmmm… I do get a strange reaction around you.”
Sirius smirked. “Do you now?”
You nodded solemnly. “Yes. It’s called secondhand embarrassment.”
Sirius barked a laugh. “Merlin, you love giving me a hard time, don’t you?”
“Oh, absolutely.”
He studied you for a second, like he was debating his next move, and then—because he was Sirius Black—he smirked again and leaned in just slightly, lowering his voice to something almost dangerous.
“Don’t worry, love,” he murmured, “I like it rough.”
For the first time, you felt your brain short-circuit.
It was barely noticeable—the fraction of a second it took you to process what he had just said—but Sirius caught it. His smirk widened ever so slightly, his eyes flickering with triumph.
Oh, hell no.
You refused to give him the satisfaction.
So you did the only logical thing: you reached out, grabbed his tie (because of course Sirius Black wore his tie loose and messy), and yanked.
Sirius stumbled forward, his hands flying up instinctively to catch himself on either side of you, palms pressing against the wall just behind your shoulders. He was close now—closer than before, his face mere inches from yours.
His smirk faltered.
Your grip on his tie tightened. “Careful, Black,” you whispered, voice dripping with amusement. “You’re playing a dangerous game.”
Sirius exhaled a laugh, but it wasn’t as confident as before. His gaze flickered to your lips—just briefly, just enough for you to notice.
And then, just as quickly, he pulled back, his usual grin snapping back into place. “Well,” he said, voice a little too casual, “this has been fun.”
You let go of his tie, smoothing it down like you hadn’t just pulled him into your trap. “Oh, so much fun.”
Sirius ran a hand through his hair, clearing his throat. “Well then. I suppose I should let you get inside before you freeze to death out here.”
You hummed. “How thoughtful of you.”
He stepped aside, finally moving out of the way, and gestured dramatically to the portrait hole. “After you, my dear.”
You walked past him, but just before stepping inside, you turned back slightly, smirking. “Try harder next time, Black.”
Sirius chuckled, watching as you disappeared into the common room.
And for the first time since this whole thing started, he realized—he was the one who needed to be careful.
Because this?
This wasn’t a game anymore.
The realization.
If someone had told Sirius Black a month ago that he’d be spending every single day trying to fluster a girl and failing miserably, he would’ve laughed in their face.
If they had told him that, in the process, he’d start genuinely enjoying her company instead of just playing around? That he’d actually start looking forward to seeing her, not just for the game but because… he liked being around her?
He would’ve called them a liar.
But here he was.
You had barely stepped into the classroom when you noticed something was off.
Your usual seat, the one you had claimed since the start of the year, was occupied.
And not by just anyone.
Sirius Black sat in your chair, lounging as if he owned the place, a smug smirk firmly in place.
You narrowed your eyes. “You’re in my spot.”
Sirius stretched lazily, arms behind his head. “Oh? Didn’t see your name on it.”
You huffed, placing a hand on your hip. “Move.”
His grin widened. “Make me.”
Oh, he wanted this.
He was practically begging for you to retaliate, thinking he had the upper hand, that he controlled this game.
Well.
He was about to learn exactly why you were a worthy opponent.
You gave him an innocent smile, stepping forward slowly. He watched you, intrigued, likely expecting you to shove him out of the chair or hit him with a sarcastic remark.
Instead, you simply… sat down.
Right in his lap.
His brain, for the first time in his entire existence, short-circuited.
Sirius froze.
James, sitting across from the both of you, choked violently on his own spit.
Peter dropped his quill.
Remus barely glanced up from his book, but there was a very distinct twitch of his lips.
“Comfortable, love?” Sirius finally managed, voice noticeably strained.
You made a show of shifting slightly, settling into place, “Quite.”
Sirius swallowed. Hard.
James rolled his eyes. “You two are actually unbearable.”
You smirked. “What’s wrong, Potter? Can’t handle a little friendly seating arrangement?”
James deadpanned. “That is not a ‘friendly’ anything.”
Sirius, still struggling to recover, cleared his throat. His hands had instinctively settled on your waist when you sat down, and it seemed he just now realized it because they suddenly twitched, as if unsure whether to move away or pull you closer.
You weren’t giving him a single second to recover.
Tilting your head slightly, you turned your head back at him, bringing your lips dangerously close to his ear. “What’s the matter, Black?” you purred. “Speechless?”
Sirius inhaled sharply, gripping your waist just slightly in retaliation. “You wish,” he muttered back, his breath warm against your skin.
James slammed his hands on the desk. “I swear, if you two start shagging right now, I’m dropping out.”
Peter just covered his eyes. “I can’t watch this.”
Remus, without looking up, turned a page in his book. “Oh, please. They’ve been shagging with their eyes for months.”
Sirius barked out a laugh, but you could feel how tense he was under you. You weren’t supposed to be this bold. You were supposed to roll your eyes and huff at him, not actually play along.
You smiled sweetly. “You alright, darling? You seem a bit… tense.”
Sirius swallowed again, eyes locked onto yours, something sharp and dark flickering in them. “Oh, sweetheart, I’m more than alright.”
“Oh, bloody hell,” James groaned, dramatically slumping onto the desk.
Peter still had his hands over his eyes, mumbling something about his innocence being shattered.
Remus just turned another page, unimpressed. “If you lot are done providing the rest of us with free entertainment, I’d like to get through at least one class today without wanting to fling myself into the Black Lake.”
He narrowed his eyes at you, trying to act as if this wasn’t affecting him in the slightest. “I hope you realize you’ve just started something you can’t finish, love.”
You hummed, your face still turned to his, almost touching. “Oh, I always finish what I start, Black.”
Sirius, determined not to be outdone, tightened his grip on your waist ever so slightly, shifting just enough to remind you of where exactly you were sitting. His lips curled into a devilish grin as he leaned in slightly.
Peter peeked through his fingers at you and Sirius, then promptly covered his eyes again. “Nope. Still too much.”
“Careful, love,” he murmured, voice smooth as silk. “You might actually start liking it here.”
And that was when Professor Slughorn walked in.
“Ah, good morning, my dear students!” Slughorn’s voice boomed through the classroom, cheerful and oblivious.
You and Sirius froze.
James’ eyes widened. “Oh, this is better than detention—”
Before he could even finish that sentence, you had launched yourself out of Sirius’s lap so quickly it was like you’d Apparated.
Sirius, whose hands had still been on your waist, was left gripping air, looking momentarily lost before hastily readjusting his posture, trying to appear as if nothing had happened.
You were already in the seat beside him, perfectly composed, as if you hadn’t just been sprawled across his lap like a queen on her throne.
Slughorn, still cheerfully setting down his books, was thankfully none the wiser.
“This isn’t over” Sirius mumbled.
You smirked, pretending to focus on your textbook. “I’d be disappointed if it was.”
Something more?
Sirius Black did not get nervous. He did not overthink. He did not, under any circumstances, lose control of his own game.
And yet—
Ever since that moment in the charms classroom, ever since the way she had looked at him, the way she brought him closer by his tie, her face barely brushed against his—
He was a mess.
He kept telling himself it was nothing. A fluke. Just a moment of bad timing. He had spent weeks flirting with you, teasing you, pushing your buttons, waiting for that one moment where you would crack—where you would get flustered, where you would lose.
But now?
Now he wasn’t even sure what the prize was anymore.
It started at breakfast.
He had taken his usual seat beside James, stretching his arms over his head with a yawn. “Morning, peasants,” he greeted, swiping a piece of toast off James’ plate.
“Morning, git,” James shot back, snatching the toast back.
Sirius ignored him, gaze already drifting down the table—searching, waiting—
And there you were.
You were laughing at something Lily had said, your head thrown back slightly, eyes crinkled with amusement. The way you smiled—the way you always did that little thing where you bit your lip slightly when you were trying to suppress a laugh—
Sirius inhaled sharply and immediately looked away.
James, who had never in his life missed an opportunity to be annoying, noticed.
James narrowed his eyes. “What was that?”
Sirius took a bite of his toast. “What was what?”
“That.” James wiggled his eyebrows. “You looked at her like—like—”
“Like he wants to marry her,” Peter supplied unhelpfully.
Sirius choked on his toast.
James gasped. “Oh my god.”
Remus, who had been listening from across the table, sighed. “Please don’t start.”
James pointed his fork at Sirius. “You like her.”
Sirius, still recovering from his near-death experience, wiped his mouth and glared. “I do not.”
James grinned. “You do.”
“I don’t.”
“You so do.”
“I—” Sirius turned back toward you, ready to prove a point, ready to do something to remind himself that this was just a game—
And, of course, you were already watching him.
You raised an eyebrow, lips twitching with amusement. Busted.
Sirius swallowed hard. “Shut up, Potter.”
James cackled.
The day went on as always. Classes, quidditch practice, pranks.
At night, the castle was quiet, the corridors nearly empty as Sirius found himself walking beside you after curfew.
It had been an accident, really—one of those oh, you’re here too? kind of moments. You would both been sneaking back to the dorms after separate misadventures and had somehow fallen into step beside each other.
You weren’t even teasing anymore. Not really. Just talking.
And Merlin help him, Sirius liked it.
He liked the way your voice softened when you talked about things you loved. He liked the way you sighed dramatically every time he said something mildly ridiculous. He liked the way you walked—confident, effortless, like she owned every damn corridor of this castle.
And he liked—
Oh.
Oh shit.
“Sirius?”
He blinked. “Hmm?”
You studied him for a moment, eyes glinting with curiosity. “You okay? You looked like you were having an existential crisis just now.”
He scoffed. “Please, I don’t do existential crises.”
You smirked. “You sure? Because you definitely looked like you were having a moment.”
Sirius rolled his eyes. “I was just… thinking.”
You gasped dramatically. “Thinking? You?”
He huffed a laugh. “You’re hilarious.”
“I know.”
There was a pause—a comfortable, easy silence.
And then you nudged him lightly with your shoulder. “You never answered.”
Sirius raised an eyebrow. “Answered what?”
“What you were thinking about.”
His stomach flipped.
He could lie. He should lie.
But instead, he just—
He looked at you.
And damn it all, he knew.
He had known for a while.
Sirius cleared his throat, stalling. “Oh, you know. Just deep, profound thoughts about life and the mysteries of the universe.”
You shot him a knowing look. “Uh-huh. And by that, you mean?”
He smirked, hands tucking into his pockets. “Why the bloody hell Filch still uses oil lamps when we have lumos.”
You rolled your eyes but laughed, shaking your head. “Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant, Black. Truly, your intellect knows no bounds.”
“Glad you noticed,” he quipped, nudging you back lightly.
And then it happened again—that lull. That moment of easy silence that should have been awkward but wasn’t. It was almost… nice.
Because you were watching him—really watching him—with those knowing eyes of yours. And maybe he was imagining it, but your usual teasing smirk wasn’t there. Instead, there was something softer, something curious, like you were actually interested in his answer.
Sirius hated it.
Because it meant something had changed.
He wasn’t supposed to enjoy your company like this. He wasn’t supposed to find it fun to just walk and talk with you without trying to one-up each other. He wasn’t supposed to feel his chest tighten slightly when you laughed at something genuine he said, rather than some over-the-top flirtation.
Merlin’s bloody beard, he was in trouble.
And he definitely wasn’t supposed to notice the way the moonlight caught in your hair, or how your eyes sparkled when you were amused, or how—
“You’re doing it again,” you observed, voice teasing but gentle.
Sirius blinked, forcing himself back to reality. “Doing what?”
“Thinking too hard,” you said, nudging him again. “That’s twice in one night. Are you feeling alright?”
“I’m fine,” he insisted, maybe a little too quickly.
Before Sirius could even attempt to come up with something—something witty, something that would push this moment back into the realm of teasing where it was safe—the sharp sound of footsteps echoed down the corridor.
They both froze.
Filch.
Sirius grabbed her wrist without thinking, tugging you into the nearest alcove. You barely had time to press yourselves against the stone wall before Filch’s lamp light flickered against the opposite wall, his grumbling voice growing louder.
Sirius could feel your breath against his neck, warm and too close. You were right there, pressed against him, your body tucked between his and the cold castle wall, and Merlin’s bloody beard, this was not helping his already spiraling thoughts.
You shifted slightly, just enough to glance at him, your lips dangerously close to his jaw. “Well, this is cozy,” you whispered.
Sirius huffed a quiet laugh, though his heart was hammering. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”
You smirked, your voice low, teasing. “Maybe.”
Filch’s footsteps paused just outside the alcove.
Sirius didn’t breathe.
Neither did you.
For a moment, it was just the sound of Filch’s muttering, the flicker of the lamp light, the distant creak of the castle settling.
Then, mercifully, the footsteps started moving again, fading into the distance.
You exhaled slowly. “That was close.”
Sirius turned his head slightly, the movement bringing his lips just a fraction closer to yours. “Too close,” he murmured.
You were looking at him now, your eyes catching the faint glow of the lantern light. There was something different in them—something Sirius couldn’t quite place, but felt deep in his chest.
You weren't smirking anymore.
And neither was he.
The air between you shifted.
Your gaze flickered to his lips—so fast he might have imagined it, but Merlin, he hoped he didn’t.
His grip on your waist tightened slightly, just for a second. He could lean in. He could close the space. He could—
Footsteps again.
You jumped apart.
This time, it was Peeves, floating lazily through the corridor, humming some dreadful little tune to himself.
Sirius exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair, trying to gather himself. When he turned back to you, you were watching him with an unreadable expression.
Then, because you were you, you smirked.
“Almost had a moment there, Black.”
Sirius, still feeling the ghost of her warmth against him, forced a grin. “You wish.”
But his heart was still pounding.
Not a game anymore.
It had been building.
For weeks, maybe even months. The teasing, the flirting, the lingering glances, the casual touches that weren’t so casual anymore. Every moment had been leading up to this—an inevitable collision of something they both had tried (and failed) to ignore.
And, as it turned out, there was only so much tension two people could handle before something snapped.
You were alone in the Gryffindor common room—again. It had become your place, their quiet retreat when everyone else had gone to bed. Sirius lounged on the couch, legs stretched out, hands behind his head, exuding obnoxious levels of confidence.
You sat beside him, one knee tucked under you, arms crossed, watching him with amusement.
Sirius smirked. “You stare at me an awful lot, love. Starting to think you actually fancy me.”
You scoffed. “Please. I stare at you the same way someone stares at a particularly dumb puppy.”
Sirius gasped, hand flying to his chest. “You wound me.”
You smirked. “You deserve it.”
“Oh, come on,” he drawled, shifting so he was closer to you. “Admit it. You think I’m irresistible.”
You rolled your eyes. “You wish.”
“I know,” he shot back, winking.
And that—that damn wink—was the final straw.
Because Sirius Black was—
Infuriating.
Cocky.
Too smug for his own good.
And yet, for some stupid, ridiculous, absolutely insane reason—
You wanted him.
And you wanted him to shut up.
So, without thinking, without hesitating, without any of your usual control—
You grabbed the collar of his stupid perfectly rumpled shirt—
And kissed him.
Sirius made a muffled sound of surprise—because, to be fair, he had not expected that.
But then—
Oh.
Oh, he liked this.
Your hands were tangled in his shirt, holding him in place like you were daring him to move away (as if he ever would ). His mind short-circuited, all thoughts completely gone except for you.
And Merlin, you kissed like you meant it.
Like you had been holding back just as much as he had.
Like you knew this had been coming all along.
Sirius reacted instinctively—one hand moving to the back of your neck, the other gripping your waist, pulling you impossibly closer. He tilted his head, deepening the kiss, savoring the way you melted into him—
And, bloody hell, he was gone.
He stared at you, breathing heavily, lips tingling, brain struggling to catch up.
When you finally pulled back (too soon, far too soon), Sirius was dazed.
You smirked. “Finally shut you up.”
Sirius blinked.
And then—
He grinned.
“Oh, love,” he murmured, voice lower than before, hands still on her waist, “if that’s how you plan to shut me up, I’m never stopping.”
You laughed—breathless, amused, maybe even a little shaken—but you didn’t move away.
Sirius tilted his head. “You liked that.”
You raised an eyebrow. “So did you.”
Sirius smirked. “Obviously.”
A pause.
A shift.
The air between you still charged, still crackling with something you could no longer ignore.
And then—
“Are we going to talk about this?” you asked, voice softer now.
Sirius exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair. “Honestly?” He met your gaze, something real in his expression. “I have no idea what to say.”
You hummed. “Good. Me neither.”
Another pause.
Another glance at your lips.
And then—
Sirius smirked. “Wanna do it again?”
You rolled your eyes—but then you grabbed his tie and pulled him in for another kiss.
And this time, neither of you were pretending.
You both didn’t stop at just one kiss.
Or two.
Or three.
It was impossible to stop when every touch, every kiss, every breath made you want more.
Sirius wasn’t sure how much time had passed—minutes? Hours? A lifetime?—before you finally broke apart, still tangled up in each other on the Gryffindor common room couch.
You were curled into his side, head resting against his shoulder, your fingers lazily tracing patterns over the fabric of his shirt. Sirius had one arm slung around your waist, holding you way too close for someone who was definitely not in love.
(Except he absolutely was).
The fire crackled in the silence, casting flickering shadows around the room.
Neither of you spoke for a long time.
And that was the problem.
Because now—now, you both actually had to deal with this.
Sirius was screwed.
Absolutely, entirely, undeniably screwed.
Because less than twelve hours after the greatest (and most terrifying) kiss of his life, the Marauders found out.
And they did not take it well.
“YOU DID WHAT?!”
Sirius winced as James’ very loud, very dramatic voice echoed through the dormitory.
Peter, wide-eyed, turned to Remus. “I knew something was up!”
Remus smirked knowingly. “Oh, we all knew.”
James, meanwhile, was pacing the room like a madman. “Okay, okay, hold on—” He spun on Sirius. “You kissed her?”
Sirius sighed. “Yes.”
James pointed aggressively. “And you liked it?”
Sirius scowled. “Obviously.”
Peter gasped. “Oh, no.”
Remus snorted. “Oh, yes.”
James took a deep breath, eyes gleaming with mischief. “Pads…” He grinned. “You like her.”
Sirius froze.
And that—that tiny moment of hesitation—was all they needed.
James screamed.
Peter looked shocked.
Remus looked entirely too smug.
Sirius groaned. “For Merlin’s sake, I don’t—”
James tackled him onto the bed. “YOU’RE IN LOVE.”
Sirius nearly threw his pillow at him. “I am not in love.”
Remus, sitting across from them, raised an eyebrow. “You do realize you’ve spent every waking moment with her lately, right?”
Peter nodded. “And you don’t even flirt with other girls anymore.”
James smirked. “And you look at her like she hung the bloody moon.”
Sirius scowled. “I do not.”
James leaned back, arms behind his head. “You know what? I think we should all start placing new bets.”
“Oh, do tell,” Remus said dryly.
James grinned. “I bet he admits he loves her by the end of the month.”
Sirius choked. “I don’t—”
“Oh, come on, Pads,” James interrupted. “It’s so obvious.”
Peter nodded. “You’re, like, way too soft around her now.”
Sirius scowled. “I am not—”
“You literally tucked her hair behind her ear yesterday,” Remus said flatly.
Sirius froze.
James and Peter howled with laughter.
“HE KNOWS!” James cackled. “HE KNOWS HE’S SCREWED!”
Sirius groaned, running a hand down his face. “I hate all of you.”
James smirked. “No, you hate yourself for falling so hard.”
The truth.
Sirius had never been nervous before.
Not really.
Not in a way that mattered.
But now? Now, as he stood in the dimly lit common room, watching you sit cross-legged on the couch, waiting for him to say something, his heart was pounding.
Because this was it. This was the moment he decided to stop being a bloody coward and actually talk to you.
No more hiding. No more pretending.
Just… the truth.
Sirius exhaled sharply, running a hand through his hair. "So, um… I need to tell you something."
You raised an eyebrow, amused. "That sentence is never a good sign."
Sirius smirked. "Depends on your definition of ‘good,’ love."
You rolled your eyes. "Alright, Black. Out with it."
Sirius hesitated. He could still back out, still pretend nothing had changed between you—
But he didn’t want to.
He took a breath. “The whole flirting thing… the game we were playing.” He met your gaze. “It started because of a bet.”
You didn’t even blink. “I know.”
Sirius frowned. “Wait—what?”
You smirked. “I know about your little bet with James.”
Sirius groaned, rubbing his temples. “Of course you do.”
You eyes sparkled with mischief. “Did you really think James Potter could keep his mouth shut about something that entertaining?”
“Merlin,” Sirius muttered. “I should have.”
You laughed, then tilted your head. “Why are you telling me this now?”
Sirius hesitated again—but only for a second. “Because it’s not a game to me anymore.” He met your gaze, something real in his expression. “I like you. And I didn’t want this to be built on a stupid bet.”
You didn't speak immediately. Just studied him, like she were assessing him.
Sirius forced himself to keep his usual bravado at bay, to let you see him instead of the version of himself he usually put on for the world.
And then—
You smiled.
A real, genuine smile.
“Well,” you said lightly, “that’s interesting.”
Sirius narrowed his eyes. “Why?”
You bit your lip, amusement dancing in your expression. “Because, Black… I had a bet too.”
Sirius blinked. “What?”
You grinned. “James bet me that I couldn’t make you fall for me.”
Sirius froze.
His brain short-circuited.
And then—
“I’m going to kill him.”
You cackled, clapping your hands. “Oh, this is perfect.”
Sirius groaned, sinking onto the couch beside you. “James bloody Potter.” He looked at you, half-amused, half-furious. “You knew?”
You nodded, smug. “Of course.”
Sirius threw his hands in the air. “James set us up.”
You shrugged. “And it worked.”
Sirius opened his mouth—then paused.
Because—
Oh, Merlin.
It did work.
He turned to look at you. “You actually like me?”
You rolled your eyes. “Why do you sound so surprised?”
Sirius scoffed. “Because you were supposed to be the one hopelessly falling for me.”
You smirked. “Guess James was right, then.”
Sirius groaned. “I hate him.”
You nudged him playfully. “No, you don’t.”
He sighed dramatically. “Fine. I love him. But I also hate him.”
You laughed, then reached out, twining your fingers through his. “For what it’s worth,” you said softly, “I was never playing a game with you. Not really.”
Sirius’ heart stuttered.
Because this—this was real.
And it was terrifying.
And he loved it.
He turned your hand over in his, brushing his thumb over your knuckles. “Yeah?”
You smiled. “Yeah.”
Sirius swallowed, something tight in his throat. “So what do we do now?”
You grinned. “Well, first—” you leaned in, voice dropping to a whisper. “—you kiss me again.”
Sirius smirked. “Oh, darling, I thought you’d never ask.”
And this time, when he kissed you, there was no bet, no game—
Just the both of you.
The aftermath.
It quickly became common knowledge that Sirius and his girlfriend (which still sounded insane to him) were the most ridiculous couple to ever exist.
Because while other couples held hands and whispered sweet nothings, Sirius and you—
Well.
You teased each other, you flirted relentlessly, annoyed each other and at the same time also had your soft moments.
James Potter deeply regretted his life choices.
Because here’s the thing—when he first made the bets, it was supposed to be hilarious. Watching Sirius try (and fail) to seduce someone who actually gave him a challenge? Comedy gold.
Watching you break Sirius Black’s unshakable confidence? Even better.
And then, somehow, those two idiots actually fell for each other.
Now, every single day, James had to deal with this.
James sat at the Gryffindor table, glaring across the Great Hall.
At you both.
Sirius had an arm slung lazily around your waist, smirking as you stole food from his plate like it belonged to you.
You weren't even subtle about it. You would just reach over, pluck a piece of toast from his hand, and take a bite without breaking eye contact.
Sirius, instead of protesting like a normal person, grinned and leaned in. “Careful, darling,” he murmured, voice low. “If you keep stealing from me, I might have to take something from you.”
You smirked. “Oh? And what exactly would you take, Black?”
Sirius’ smirk widened. “Guess you’ll have to find out.”
You just shook your head and smiled, he reached out to take a sip of tea from your cup. It was strange how comfortable you were around each other.
You yawned, resting your head in his shoulder, the moment quickly shifting from teasing to softness. This was the kind of thing that always happened between you, you could just go from full on annoying each other to the cutest moment ever.
"Tired, baby?" Sirius whispered, his fingers caressing your hip softly. His voice soft.
You had a small smile in your lips. "It's all your fault and that horrible Muggle game"
"You were the one that kept asking for a rematch" Sirius grinned, letting a soft kiss in your hair.
James slammed his fork onto the table. “I hate this.”
You and Sirius came out of your love bubble, looking at James while trying to hold back the laughter. James was definitely regretting his life decisions.
Remus, barely looking up from his plate, hummed. “No, you don’t.”
James gestured wildly. “They’re so annoying.”
Peter snorted. “They’re exactly the same as before. Just… more obnoxious.”
Sirius turned to James, absolutely radiating smugness. “Something wrong, Prongs?”
James scowled. “Yeah. You two.”
You raised an eyebrow, feigning innocence. “Why, James, I thought you wanted us to be together.”
“I take it back.”
Sirius chuckled, pressing a ridiculously over-the-top kiss to the top of you head just to piss James off more. “Too late.”
James groaned, flopping onto the table dramatically. “This is hell.”
Remus patted his back. “You did bring this upon yourself.”
James let out a miserable sigh. “Worst idea ever.”
#marauders era#x reader#marauders#x yn#fanfic#harry potter#remus lupin#sirius black#james potter#sirius black x reader#sirius black x you
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So I saw a post on Pinterest and I thought it would be a good idea for a fanfic?im just gonna type it out and explain it after
Peter: im back from my trip i got you another magnet mr.white wolf
Bucky:cool stick it on
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Tony: is that peters shopping list on your arm?
Bucky: yea
Tony: what the
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Tony: Peter you need to stop using buckys arm as a fridge
Peter: Mr. White wolf said it helps him associate the arm with something other than murder
Tony: crying
So basically I was wondering if you could do this well not this interaction but like reader and Bucky are friends and reader is Peter? If that makes any sense?
STICKERS
⤷ JAMES B. “BUCKY” BARNES
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![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/61525fee78e5bc3ff4aecb6c55e628bd/bfaa2047bf3f6630-ac/s500x750/006ccc76347dab8ee55667c0c3e7a8f25aff3216.jpg)
![Tumblr media](https://64.media.tumblr.com/7d7fc0bd613b3ba8ea7cf50b5679b089/bfaa2047bf3f6630-f0/s500x750/1656c4e2c3b885b5c5261f1496db6a45f3ea6ddd.jpg)
ᯓ★ Pairing: James B. “Bucky” Barnes x teen!gn!reader
ᯓ★ Genre: platonic, fluff
ᯓ★ Word count: 2.5k (I'm so sorry if it's too short, hope you like it anyway)
ᯓ★ Summary: Bucky always lets you stick stickers to his vibranium arm but had never told you why...until now.
ᯓ★ I hope I understood the request well, and I tried to make the reader gender neutral since it wasn't specified in the ask, hope you like it <3
ᯓ★ Songs & Superheroes tales - The Game (to make a request, follow the rules on the link!)
ᯓ★ MARVEL Bingo (requests open)
ᯓ★ Masterlist
ᯓ★ If you are a Charles Xavier fan click on this link!
ᯓ★ English isn’t my first language and this isn’t proof read
The hum of the compound is familiar by now. Machines whir softly in the background, the faint scent of coffee lingers in the air, and somewhere in the distance, you can hear Sam and Tony bickering over something that probably doesn’t matter. This is home—at least, as close as it gets. It wasn’t always, but things changed. The world changed, and you had to change with it.
Being here is better than being out there. You know that much. The compound is safer. It’s structured. Sure, it’s a little weird living with a bunch of Avengers, but it beats the alternative. When SHIELD fell apart, a lot of things got messy, including your life. No family, no place to go, just a kid caught in the middle of something bigger than them. Steve found you first, said they’d figure something out, and now, somehow, you’ve ended up here. Officially, you’re under the Avengers’ protection. Unofficially, you’re the compound’s resident stray.
“Alright, what is it this time?”
Bucky’s voice pulls you out of your thoughts, and you glance up from where you’ve been hunched over the kitchen counter, fidgeting with a fresh roll of stickers. He’s standing in the doorway, arms crossed, looking at you with an exasperated sort of fondness.
You grin. “You make it sound like I’ve done something bad.”
He raises an eyebrow. “Haven’t you?”
“Depends on your definition of ‘bad,’” you say, tearing off a small sticker shaped like a cat. Without hesitation, you reach out and press it to the cool vibranium of his forearm. It sticks perfectly, just like you knew it would.
Bucky sighs like a man who has known deep suffering. “Why do you keep doing this?”
“Because you let me,” you answer simply, peeling off another sticker—this one shaped like a tiny watermelon slice—and placing it beside the first.
It’s true. You started doing this months ago, fully expecting him to shut it down after the first few times. He never did. The first time, it had been a dumb impulse, something to break the tension. You’d been talking, and without really thinking about it, you’d stuck a star-shaped sticker onto his arm. He’d given you a long, unreadable look but hadn’t peeled it off. That was all the encouragement you needed.
Now, it’s a habit. Every time you see him, you add a new one. Sometimes, he’ll pretend not to notice. Other times, he’ll act put-upon, like he’s carrying some great burden. You know better, though. If he really hated it, he wouldn’t still be standing here, letting you decorate his arm like it’s an elementary school art project.
“I let you do a lot of things,” he mutters, watching as you place a little frog next to the watermelon.
“And that’s why you’re my favorite,” you say, grinning.
“Steve’s gonna be hurt,” he points out.
“Steve’s got enough fans,” you reply, reaching for another sticker. This one’s a smiley face with sunglasses. You stick it on his wrist.
Bucky glances down at his arm, then back at you. His expression softens—just a little. “Y’know, people used to be scared of me.”
“Yeah, well,” you say, adding a rainbow to his forearm, “they clearly weren’t looking hard enough. You’re a giant teddy bear.”
He scoffs, but there’s no real heat behind it. “A ‘teddy bear’ with a metal arm and a kill count.”
“Even teddy bears have claws,” you say, shrugging. “Besides, you let a teenager put stickers on you. That automatically lowers your intimidation factor.”
Bucky huffs but doesn’t argue. You know he won’t take them off. He never does, at least not right away. Sometimes, hours later, you’ll spot him across the compound, still wearing them.
That’s enough for you.
It doesn’t take long for the others to notice.
The first one to point it out is Sam.
You’re both sitting in the common room, Bucky on the couch, you curled up on the opposite end, sorting through a new pack of stickers you got from a store Tony let you raid on a supply run. They’re good ones, too—holographic, shimmery, some even glow in the dark. You’re in the process of carefully placing a tiny raccoon on Bucky’s wrist when Sam strolls in, eyes scanning the room before landing on the two of you.
His brows pull together. “Uh, what the hell is that?”
Bucky, who has clearly mastered the art of selective ignorance, doesn’t look up from his book. You, however, grin and wave. “What’s what?”
“That,” Sam says, pointing at Bucky’s arm like it personally offended him.
Bucky finally sighs, lowering his book just enough to glare over the top of it. “You’re gonna have to be more specific, man.”
Sam narrows his eyes and gestures again. “That. The stickers. What am I looking at?”
You lean back, admiring your work. By now, Bucky’s metal arm is covered in a vibrant mess of stickers—cartoon animals, little hearts, a glittery UFO, and even a miniature Avengers logo you’d snuck in just for fun.
You beam. “Art.”
Sam blinks. He looks at Bucky, then back at you, then back at Bucky. “And you’re just…letting them do this?”
Bucky shrugs. “Yeah.”
Silence. Sam stares, mouth opening and closing like he wants to say something but can’t find the words. Eventually, he just lets out a short, disbelieving laugh. “Man, you really are getting soft.”
Bucky flips him off without looking up.
You take that as permission to add another sticker—a rainbow-colored star, right on his shoulder.
Sam shakes his head, muttering something under his breath before grabbing his drink from the fridge and heading out, still looking vaguely disturbed by what he just witnessed.
Of course, Sam being Sam, the moment he’s out of the room, you know he’s going to tell the others.
The next one to comment on it is Natasha.
You’re sitting at the kitchen counter, helping yourself to a bowl of cereal, when she walks in. She nods at you in greeting before grabbing a protein bar from the cabinet. It’s a normal morning, nothing out of the ordinary—until she glances at Bucky and does a double-take.
She tilts her head slightly. “Did you get in a fight with a Lisa Frank notebook?”
You nearly choke on your cereal.
Bucky, who is now used to this reaction, doesn’t even blink. “No.”
Natasha takes a bite of her protein bar, studying him. “Then why does your arm look like a kindergarten art project?”
Bucky doesn’t answer, so you take it upon yourself. “Because I put them there.”
Natasha arches an eyebrow. “And he let you?”
“Obviously,” you say, popping another spoonful of cereal into your mouth.
She’s quiet for a moment, her sharp gaze flicking from you to Bucky. You half-expect her to make a snarky comment or tease him, but instead, she just hums and says, “Huh.”
And then she reaches into her pocket, pulls out a tiny cat magnet, and sticks it to his forearm before walking away like nothing happened.
Bucky stares after her, brow furrowed. He lifts his arm slightly, looking at the magnet now clinging to the vibranium.
You snort. “You’re officially a walking fridge.”
He groans.
It only gets worse from there.
A few days later, Steve notices.
You’re in the gym, watching Bucky and Steve spar while pretending to be invested in a book. In reality, you’re mostly waiting for them to finish so you can rope Bucky into watching a movie with you.
Steve circles Bucky, eyes narrowed in concentration. He throws a punch, which Bucky easily dodges. There’s a beat of silence before Steve suddenly drops his stance, frowning.
“…Are those stickers?”
Bucky sighs. “Jesus Christ.”
Steve squints, stepping back to get a better look. “They are.” His frown deepens. “And…are those magnets?”
You bite back a laugh.
Bucky glares at you like this is somehow your fault (which, to be fair, it is).
Steve crosses his arms. “You’ve been walking around like this?”
“Yes.”
“And you just…let them do it?”
“Yes.”
Steve blinks, clearly struggling to process this information. You can practically see the gears turning in his head, trying to reconcile the image of his best friend, ex-Winter Soldier, walking around covered in colorful stickers and fridge magnets.
Eventually, he just sighs. “You’re impossible.”
Bucky smirks. “Took you this long to figure that out?”
Steve shakes his head, clearly exasperated, but doesn’t push the subject further.
You take that as a win.
Tony’s reaction is arguably the best.
You’re in the lab with Bucky, keeping him company while Tony messes around with something that looks vaguely explosive. He’s in the middle of rambling about some new upgrade for Bucky’s arm when he abruptly stops mid-sentence.
His eyes narrow. “Hold on.”
Bucky tenses. “What?”
Tony steps closer, squinting at his arm. He lifts a finger and flicks one of the magnets, watching as it wobbles slightly before settling back into place.
“…Are you kidding me?”
Bucky groans. “Not you too.”
Tony bursts out laughing. “Oh, this is rich. You—you’ve been walking around like this? Just letting them stick things to you?”
“Yes,” Bucky says flatly.
Tony looks at you, still grinning. “You did this?”
You nod proudly. “Yep.”
He lets out an impressed whistle. “Wow. I gotta say, Barnes, I didn’t think you had it in you.”
Bucky rolls his eyes. “Are you done?”
Tony pretends to consider. “Nope.”
Bucky mutters something under his breath and turns to leave, but before he can make his escape, Tony suddenly grabs a Stark Industries magnet from his workbench and slaps it onto Bucky’s bicep with a satisfied smirk.
Bucky glares at him. “I hate you.”
Tony winks. “No, you don’t.”
You snicker as Bucky stomps out of the lab, now sporting a Stark-branded magnet.
Despite the teasing, Bucky never takes them off right away.
Sometimes, you’ll catch him absentmindedly running his fingers over a sticker while he’s reading or training. Other times, you’ll see him glance down at his arm, something soft and unreadable in his expression before he quickly schools his face back into neutrality.
You don’t push. You don’t have to.
He lets you do this because he knows it makes you happy. Because he knows it makes you feel safe.
And, maybe—just maybe—because he doesn’t mind it as much as he pretends to.
The stickers—and now magnets—become a daily ritual.
At this point, everyone in the compound has noticed. Clint, predictably, laughs himself half to death when he first sees Bucky with a sparkly unicorn sticker on his wrist. Thor, on the other hand, is completely unbothered. He takes one look, nods approvingly, and later gifts you a set of Asgardian insignia stickers that you immediately slap onto Bucky’s arm. Even Bruce, who usually keeps to himself, quietly asks if he can contribute and hands you a little atom-shaped magnet one afternoon.
Bucky grumbles about it, of course. He sighs dramatically when you press another sticker onto his arm, acts like it’s the greatest inconvenience in the world, but he never actually stops you. He never pulls away. He never tells you no.
And he never takes them off until he’s alone.
You start paying attention, watching him when he thinks no one else is looking. He’ll be in the middle of a conversation, his fingers absentmindedly brushing over the stickers on his forearm, tracing the edges. You notice that he doesn’t cover his arm as much anymore—not as often as he used to. Before, he wore long sleeves even in the middle of summer, like he couldn’t stand the sight of it. Now, he just lets it be.
That realization sits in the back of your mind for a long time.
Then, one day, you ask.
It’s late.
Most of the compound has already turned in for the night. The common room is quiet, dimly lit by the glow of the television, where some old black-and-white movie plays with the volume low. You’re curled up on the couch next to Bucky, a fresh pack of stickers in your lap.
You press a new one onto his arm—a tiny golden retriever wearing sunglasses—before hesitating.
“Hey, Buck?”
He glances down at you. “Yeah?”
You fidget slightly, turning the next sticker over in your hands. “…Why do you let me do this?”
Bucky blinks, like he wasn’t expecting that question. “Huh?”
You gesture vaguely to his arm, now covered in an assortment of colorful stickers and small magnets. “This. Why do you let me put them on you? You could’ve told me to stop. But you didn’t.”
For a moment, he’s quiet. His expression shifts—just a little—but you catch it. A flicker of something uncertain, something careful, like he’s picking his words before speaking.
Then, finally, he exhales.
“…Because it helps.”
You tilt your head. “Helps with what?”
Bucky glances down at his arm, his fingers skimming over the stickers.
“You know what this arm used to be,” he says, his voice quieter than before. “What it used to do.”
You don’t say anything. You don’t need to.
He swallows, his jaw tight. “For a long time, it felt like it didn’t belong to me. Like it was just…a weapon. A part of me that wasn’t really mine.” His fingers brush over the little cartoon raccoon you stuck near his wrist. “But then you started doing this. And…I don’t know. It’s stupid.”
“It’s not,” you say immediately.
He lets out a short, humorless laugh. “Maybe not. But it’s…different, now. When I look at it.” He pauses, then shakes his head. “When I see the stickers, I don’t think about the things I’ve done. I think about you. About Sam rolling his eyes, Nat sneaking magnets onto me, Steve acting like he doesn’t get it even though he does.” His voice softens. “I think about now. Not then.”
You don’t know when your eyes started burning, but suddenly, it’s hard to see. You swallow thickly, trying to blink away the sting.
“Oh,” you say, and it comes out smaller than you meant it to.
Bucky glances at you, eyes sharp. “Hey. Don’t cry on me, kid.”
“I’m not,” you lie, furiously rubbing at your eyes. “It’s just—you just said something really nice, and my dumb emotions weren’t prepared for it.”
Bucky huffs a quiet laugh. “You’re ridiculous.”
“Says the guy covered in stickers,” you sniff, but you’re smiling now, even if your throat is still tight.
Bucky shakes his head, rolling his eyes, but there’s something softer in his expression when he looks at you.
“…Thanks, kid.”
You look up at him. “For what?”
He gestures vaguely at his arm. “This. The stickers. Everything.”
You don’t know what to say to that, so you just grab another sticker and carefully press it onto the back of his hand.
Bucky glances down at it. It’s a tiny heart.
He smiles.
I'm so sorry if this it's too short I didnt know what else to add :(
#amethyst arachnid#marvel#marvel x reader#marvel fanfiction#comics#gaming#movies#x reader#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes x reader#bucky fanfic#bucky barnes#bucky x reader#bucky x you#james buchanan barnes#winter soldier#the winter soldier#james bucky barnes#platonic fanfic#platonic relationships#platonic#gn reader#x gn reader#x you#light angst
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i literally never said it was some evil thing he did. perhaps i think it is, perhaps not. but on the post, all i said was that trump removed it from whitehouse.gov, which is a fact. i will not be emailing because you are correct. there are plenty of other places in which i can find the constitution. besides, i have my own copy downloaded now. i dont need the constitution on whitehouse.gov. it was just an observation i made that it was now missing from it.
i never claimed to be a "giant of intellectual honesty." im just some kid on the internet. im just saying, if a lot of people think you did a nazi salute, which i think we both agree is a horrible thing to do, then wouldn't you clarify? yes, he said "my heart goes out to you" but i mean afterwards. after all chaos and arguments such as this one we're having right now. wouldn't you apologize and clarify that that was NOT your intention? he literally never denied it. that's what worries me.
does this not concern you? you're denying he did the salute, so i'm assuming that you agree that being a nazi is very bad and you say he didn't do it because you believe he is not a very bad person. but why did he make jokes about this? i know some people believe "dark humor" can include things like this (i don't, i think this is most definitely going too far, but the whole dark humor conversation is a debate for another time) but even if you're one to excuse these kinds of jokes, this is NOT the time. he's worked his way into politics, he's a politician now. a US politician holding as much power as he does is not supposed to go online and make nazi puns when accused of being a nazi.
i'm going to sleep now, since it's quite late for me. assuming you're also in a timezone in the us, it's either 2, 3, 4, or 5am for you (unless you're in hawaii or alaska which is pretty cool honestly). i'll probably block you in the morning because i really don't care enough to continue this argument. it's that easy, yknow, especially on tumblr. if someone's posts annoy you, you can block them! nobody takes it personally here. i really do hope you are right in the end and all my fear is for nothing. if that does happen, i will apologize to you personally. have a great night, a great weekend, and a happy president's day because that's coming up on monday :)
i have a folder in my computer called "just in case" where i have important documents saved, like the constitution (since trump REMOVED IT from whitehouse.gov) and books that might get banned
im obviously going to add more, if anyone has any reccomendations please let me know. just wanted to share because i think its a good idea going into these next 4+ years.
EDIT i've also added a clip of elon doing the nazi salute because its taken down a lot of places and likely will be removed everywhere. as well as screenshots of what happened when you searched "presidents in order" (it did not show biden) and "president from 2020-2024" (it showed trump) but have since been fixed
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Just recently came across your blog and saw requests were open again! I especially love the Sonic fics in the movieverse.
I’ve seen scenarios where there was a teen!Wachowski and is essentially a sibling to them. I thought it would be cute for something like Sonic, Knuckles, and maybe even Shadow (he’d have joined the family, obviously) acting protective brothers over their human sibling since they’re not nearly as strong or durable. Any scenario would do, though I can’t help but think of if it involved dating someone and they would react like: are they cool enough? Are they strong enough? Are they working for G.U.N.???
Anywho, if you get to this, I would like to see how you write it out. Thanks!
Omg yes I was thinking about something like this and I'm all for it!
Pairings -> Sonic the Hedgehog, Kunckles the Echidna, Shadow the hedgehog x Sibling Reader (platonic)
Warnings -> None
Note -> Them being protective over their human older sibling
Genre -> Fluff
Sonic The Hedgehog
I feel like he will be the less protective one out of the three of them
He would probably ask a lot of questions though to get some information about them if you were dating someone
But in all seriousness I feel like he would help you
Since he thinks he's the most romantic guy out there
Sonics just a goof, a dork
"You have a what!?" Sonic screamed out which made you quickly cover his mouth as you shushed him
"Be quiet Sonic, Mum and Dad doesn't know yet, dad would probably freak out if I told him now" You spoke out
Sonic moved you hand as he was awe "Aww you told me before anyone else?" Sonic was so happy that you told him
"But in all seriousness, what are they like?" Sonic asked "Are they cool? Sporty? Popular?"
"Woah calm down, I will tell you everything, just don't tell the other though, I'll tell them myself soon"
"Tell me the details Sib"
Knuckles The Echidna
He would be the protective one besides Shadow
Like he doesn't want your heart to be broken by a weakling
But you reassure him that this person was really sweet and wouldn't do anything to hurt you
"A what now?" Knuckles asked, Knuckles wasn't quite familiar with the term partner so you explained it to him in a simple way
"A partner is where me and that people are together in a relationship where we love each other" You explained to him hoping he would get it
Knuckle just nodded, his face still in a frown while his arms was crossed against his chest
"Are they strong enough to protect you, If not then they are not worthy of your kindness" Knuckles huffed
You just rolled your eyes "I hope they are, but please Knuckles they are really sweet and wouldn't let anything happen to me I promise"
"Have you told the others" Knuckles asked
"I did tell Sonic, but later I will tell Shadow and hope that goes well"
"You should tell him now"
Shadow The Hedgehog
Oh boy
This was going be a long conversation with you and Shadow
Shadow was quite the grumpy and protective type
You knew he was gonna ask questions about them anyway
"Hey Shads" You greeted him while he was sitting down the comfy couch
"Hey" He gruff, as he watched the TV in front of him, "I need to tell you something"
Shadow the turned off the TV then looked at you
"Are you hurt?"
"No! no I'm not I just need to speak to you about something"
"That is?"
"I have a partner"
His ear flicked at that word, he was then processing what you just said than it finally clicked
"You mean that you are in a relationship with someone?"
You nodded "Yep" Nervously sweating
"Are they secretly working for G.U.N? Are they strong enough to protect you? What if they hurt you later in the future?"
"Woah slow down Shadow, No they don't work for G.U.N if they did then I wouldn't be with them"
Shadow stared at you then sighed
"I will be fine Shads, If anything happens I know you and the others will protect me"
-A<3
#sonic fanfiction#sonic the hedgehog movie#sonic movie#sonic fandom#sonic the hedgehog#sonic 3 movie#sonic 3#sonic movie 3#sonic x reader#sonic the hedgehog x reader#knuckles the echidna x reader#knuckles x reader#knuckles the echidna#shadow the hedgehog x reader#shadow x reader#shadow the ultimate lifeform#shadow the hedgehog
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Unspoken Signals
A/N: reaaaallly tried to get this out for v-day. It’s been a while, I’m a bit rusty, but this is a quick fic w Harry and you as coworkers and a casual something else. Hope you enjoy 🫶🏼
—————————————————————-
“Well this is different,” I comment.
Before me sits a dozen children and they’re all very quiet. It’s music to my ears after the last hour.
“I didn’t know kids could even do yoga.”
“You didn’t know kids could stretch?” I raise a brow.
“The meditating part,” Harry clarifies. “I didn’t know they could quiet their minds and their demon mouths.”
I laugh softly and turn back to the kids. A couple are starting to get restless, peeking one eye open or scratching their noses—picking them more like. But it’s nice for the few minutes.
Both Harry and I worked at an art museum that had recently lost some of its funding and had decided to open up revenue streams by introducing “kids fun weekends”. So despite having zero training in early education, staff at the museum found ourselves having to look after children and host workshops from time to time.
So far we’d been volun-told to help with a crafts day, a movie night, wellness day, and an upcoming museum sleepover.
And I was so not being paid enough to deal with hyperactive children.
“Why do kids even need a wellness workshop?” Harry continues to whisper back to me. “They’ve got stressful jobs or something? Bloody put me on one and let me go home.”
“Anyone can experience stress Har,” I roll my eyes. Harry was one of those people who didn’t care about being politically correct when he spoke. Which led to a lot of bickering between us that most of our coworkers had gotten used to.
“The stress of any of these kids does not bloody compare to the stress of an adult.”
“Don’t be such an ageist,” I reply.
“Ageist? What the fuck,” he swears. “Do you just put a word in front of -ist and create a new prejudice?”
I gasp and hold his shoulder, “prejudice? Where did you learn such a large word?”
“Now you’re just being a word-ist,” Harry says smugly.
I snort despite myself, “And you’ve always been a prick.”
“Piss off,” Harry whispers. “This is unfair.”
We stand in silence, forced to do our job of keeping watch over the kids. But as they grow more agitated and so does Harry, I realize I really didn’t want to be here either.
“Well have you seen the new fake-Monet collection?” I ask.
It wasn’t actually fake-Monet. It was a local artist we were hosting in our community gallery that showcased…local artists. The first piece we ever saw hung up looked like a Monet so we took to calling him that.
“No. Not after that first forgery.”
“Wanna ditch this and check it out?”
“Fuck yes.” Harry’s eyes finally draw some life to them.
We leave our two other coworkers to deal with freshly-meditated children and sneak away.
The art museum wasn’t a large building; the ground floor was taken up by the open lobby, offices, the gift shop, and some of the more permanent exhibits. The second floor had revolving galleries and the community gallery sat on the third floor.
“D’you think anyone’s actually going to buy the guy’s fakes?” Harry asks.
“Probably,” I jam the button for the lift. “I saw a couple more pieces and they were beautiful.”
“You find any piece of art beautiful.”
“Well they are! It’s easy to find beauty in a lot of things if you’re not a prick.”
The lift arrives and the doors open; the reflection inside show a tall curly-haired annoyed bloke. Walking in with him is a shorter girl, rolling her eyes.
“I’m not a prick.” He looks down at me. “I just have standards.”
Suddenly in the enclosed space of the lift we’re gravitating towards each other like we tended to do. I smile up at him sweetly and he tsks and pushes me away by my chin; a conversation taking place with just our eyes.
The thing with Harry and me—because it was just a thing we didn’t label, was simple: we liked being around each other (despite being able to get on each other’s nerves).
We kinda just orbited each other and we were comfortable with it; some days he would follow me home and we’d hang out, get dinner, sleep together, and other nights I’d show up at his and we’d fold right into one another.
It was fun, and it felt cool not to label it. It felt very adult, like Harry and I were mature enough to appreciate the other in every aspect without being possessive enough to need to label it. Like somehow we were proving just how secure we were by doing it like this.
“You just like being judgemental,” I say and as the doors open onto the third floor I turn to walk out. “Because you’re an idiot.”
Outside stand at older couple who’ve definitely heard the last bit. I apologize and pray they don’t complain to anyone about the staff.
“Very unprofessional,” Harry goads as he laughs. “Do you harass all the elderly at the museum.”
“Shut up!” I shove him against the wall and he stumbles down.
“Oi!” He calls out as I walk away. “Oi! Help me up!”
“Help yourself!” I finally turn. He’s sprawled on the ground like this was his bedroom—because I’d seen the inside of his bedroom I would know. But he stays for so long I hurry back, not wanting anyone to walk past and get us in trouble for laying in the middle of the hall.
“I knew you’d come,” he smiles sweetly, his large hand in the air ready for me to grip.
“C’mon—“
I see it coming too late and he’s already trapped me in. He pulls me forward and I stumble into him, nearly catching myself on the wall. Nearly. I tumble into him instead.
“Grow up!” I scramble off of him as quick as I could. Because the one unspoken rule in this thing between us was staying nothing but platonic coworkers at work.
And that was the other thing about us—this unlabelled situation we were in. That as casual as we appeared there was a lot of orchestrating going on behind the scenes in order to be this nonchalant.
For example, only touching outside of work, not asking about dates the other went out on the weekend before, like saying you’re funny and where’ve you been when it’s been a while so as not to say I really like you and I want to be around you more and when you’re not around I miss you more than an unlabelled half should. Like getting drunk when I spot him at a club with another girl so I can continue to convince myself I really didn’t care all that much.
It was just Harry. At most we were just friends.
“This is me grown up,” Harry catches up to me. He can sense I’m annoyed and maybe he’s crossed a line so he lingers slightly behind.
I ignore him as I push the glass door into the gallery. This was one of my favourite spaces because of the large windows and views of the garden below planted by friends of the museum.
But mostly I loved it because it was a revolving door of local artists and it reminded me that everyone had a story to tell. And every story was beautiful.
“Don’t cry this time,” Harry whispers to me as he walks down the gallery to the far end.
“It was one time,” I mumble. That I actually cried. Usually I just teared up.
I couldn’t help it though, there was so much meaning and time put into these pieces. So much love and grief and every emotions on the spectrum. And I felt it all.
I decide I’d stop calling the artist fake-Monet because with a few more paintings I began to recognize his own signature style. He paints about personal community and finding it in public spaces—pockets around London.
“Hey look at this one,” Harry says when I’m a few pieces away. I walk over.
It’s unmistakably Hampstead Heath, the park a half hour walk from here and 15 from Harry’s place. It’s where we spent a lazy summer day a month or so ago. We were both free on the Saturday, our calendars opening up. I met Harry at his and we’d trekked through the hazy city to feel the cool breeze of the sturdy trees and the splash of the water. Despite the stickiness, we’d tucked into each other and pretended the shade was enough to keep us cool—enough to be so close. We read our book, took a summer nap, ate our picnic, and chatted about the rest of our lives. Passerbys would see two friends, or maybe two something-mores.
It’s only when the sun slinked down towards the horizon did we pack up. We walked back to his flat, took a shower together. We had dinner with his friends. It had been such a beautiful day I had ached with it because I knew how temporary it was.
But how perfect it had been. It had felt bigger than us.
Harry pointing it out toes that line again; he remembered it too, as something to reference. As something to compare to the beautiful richness of the tapestry before us—lavenders and lilacs, pinks and blues, sage, and dusty hues.
“Beautiful,” I murmur. We’re standing shoulder to shoulder now, I can’t tell who’s leaning on who.
“It…actually is.” Harry says in a hushed voice back. “I’m sorry fake-Monet that I doubted you.”
I look up at him in surprise, Harry rarely changed his mind. “Actually?”
“Yeah.” He looks down at me. “I think I get it.”
The expression in his eyes as he says this, as they fill with meaning, I have to look away. But the painting doesn’t help. It’s too full of my own meaning. Our meaning.
But there was no our.
“Wow.” I straighten up and move closer. “Look at that blending. And the details those are actually people.”
“They’ve all got their own shadow too.” Harry moves closer towards me again. He points it out.
“I’m gonna go look for shadows in the others.” I chirp just so I can get away. So I can keep denying.
A few hours later, the day is giving to nightfall. I badge out with Harry and we walk down the steps towards the iron gates.
“See you tomorrow?” I ask.
“I’m not in tomorrow.” He reminds me.
“Oh yeah your parents are in town?”
“Yep,” he fidgets with his phone and we stand in silence for a beat.
“Well I should-“ I say just as he asks, “Would you want to-“
We pause, awkward laugh. We were never awkward.
“You first,” I urge, wanting to know what he was going to ask.
“No it’s nothing. I should go. Got to clean my flat before my parents see how I live.”
“Don’t forget to hide the rolling papers from your bedside,” I tease. “And the magazines under the bed.”
“Oi I haven’t got magazines under the bed,” he smiles. His dimples make a handsome appearance. “They’re loud and proud on the coffee table now.”
“Except you haven’t got a coffee table.”
“If you know so much about my flat how about you come home with me and help me clean it? You can stay over.”
Come home with me. Casual, so casual.
But I know how calculated it had to be. I’d been there. Somehow I knew this is what he’d been trying to ask in the first place.
“What time are your parents getting in?” I ask.
“They’re early birds. Probably after 8.”
“8? Holy hell.” I swear.
“They want to do breakfast and then take me to visit my grandparents.”
“Right. Yeah well, imagine I’m still not out by the time they show up. That’d be so awkward. And there’s no way in hell I’m getting up before 8.”
His cheeks take on a slight blush. “They’ve…it wouldn’t be the first time they came over to a girl in my bed YN. I’m not 16.”
“I know. But…still awkward.”
“So?”
“I…don’t want them to get the wrong idea. We’ll see each other the day after. You’re working then right?”
My heart squeezes a bit at his crushed look before it’s swapped for happy, for easygoing. “Yep. Can’t get rid of me that quick.”
We part ways, I go mine with a heavy heart.
***
“So,” I check in with Harry at lunch the day he’s back. It had been a hectic day yesterday with a new group of kids and a new workshop to facilitate. Plus someone was quitting after being yelled at and Harry had missed it all so I wanted to update him. “How was your day off.”
“Shite,” he says. We walk a few streets over to a Pret. “Mum and dad wouldn’t stop whinging about my future and about settling down like I’m a fucking balding man in my 50s losing all prospects. I’m only 25!”
“Yeah total bummer having a day off for that,” I comment even though I have a hard time getting my next breath in. I can’t imagine my own parents caring that much about my life to spend a whole day with me talking about it. And what if I had stayed the night and accidentally bumped into them—would they have approved?
Should I even care?
“Then my nan basically told them to piss off but they started filling her head with it and then she’s asking me about any girls I’ve taken on dates lately. Started giving me relationship advice!”
“What was that?” I tease. “Take her on a walk and buy her some flowers? Go star gazing? Movie for 2 quid?”
Harry glances at me and his seriousness throws me off balance a little.
“What?”
He opens his mouth, then shrugs and closes it. “Nothing.”
“Sorry did I offend you?” I try to think of why he might be reacting this way.
“No, she actually did say some pretty old-fashioned shite. But I can take it from her. It’s my parents that drive me nuts.”
“Well I wish you were at work. Want to hear what happened?”
So I change the subject and we talk about what he missed. He’s more subdued today and I don’t read into it. He wasn’t mine to read into, I have to remind myself.
We talk about the gallery sleepover in two weeks, whether we were actually going to come in our PJs. When we get back to work we’re on different floors and I try not to miss him again.
***
“I actually brought mine—the appropriate pair.” My coworker jokes. We’re in the staff kitchen making an afternoon tea. Tonight was the gallery sleepover and I was not looking forward to it. But because I was working it I had the day off tomorrow and at least that was something to look forward to.
“I just brought a ratty tee. I don’t think I’m sleeping anyway.” I say.
“I hate that we got picked for this,” she continues. “I actually don’t even like kids. Why do you think I have none?”
“Well tonight will just be birth-control.”
“Trust me I don’t need it.” She cackles and walks away. My phone buzzes with a text.
Harry: Might be late tonight. cover for me if anyone asks?
Y: ur not even working the day how are u gonna be late?
Harry: got a thing. Just cover pls?
Y: obv
I wonder what was going on with him.
We hadn’t had a lot of opportunities to hang out the last week and work had been too busy to properly catch up. Plus our manager had been putting us on conflicting projects so I really had been missing Harry.
Even though Harry and I were friends there was something about distance and fondness that was proving true lately. And I hated it. So I’d gone on a string of dates this week. Hence my busyness.
I’d gone out on a date a week ago and even though I ended up going back to his place all I wanted to do was text Harry. Ask him if he was up, what he was doing. I’d forced myself to shut my phone so I wouldn’t be tempted.
After we close the doors to the public that evening we begin setting up for the kids’ sleepover. It’s so hectic nobody notices Harry’s late but he slides right in helping me string the lights in our biggest gallery. We work on the projectors next, I yap to him for 10 minutes straight and he barely replies. He’d been quiet since he got here.
And for the next few hours Harry and I entertain and help children have fun, we put on a fancy puppet show loosely based on famous artists—art projections included.
We sneak away to the kitchen after we take our bow for a tea break.
“Wouldn’t happen to have a flask on ya?” Harry sighs as he strains his tea bag.
“God I wish,” I stare into the dark abyss of my earl gray. That performance had really taken it out of me. “Who d’you think’s most likely to have something stashed away?”
“Well,” Harry yawns like he hadn’t slept all week and points to an upper cabinet. “Behind the cleaning stuff.”
“What?!” I gasp. “Seriously?”
“Well last time I saw it was last Christmas. Probably got some alcoholics here. I dunno if the stash is still there.”
“Well this is naughty,” I find a couple travel-sized liquor bottles like the kind you get on planes. I take one so that somebody else can have the delight of the other.
Harry sticks his mug out and I empty half the bottle, doing the same to mine.
“Make sure it’s covered,” he advises when I throw it in the bin. I shake it around until I can’t see it.
“Much better,” I cheers my mug to his. He catches my eye and it feels like we’re co-conspirators again. I pass a smile that’s only half-returned. “So what’s the deal with you?”
“Hm?” He doesn’t look up from his drink.
“I’ve barely seen you all week. And you’re late tonight. And you look haggard as hell.”
He shrugs, “I’ve been helping one of my mates out with moving out of his girlfriend’s. They broke up. He’s a mess so…”
“Oh.” I wasn’t expecting that. “That’s kind of you.”
“You sound surprised.”
“Do I?” I widen my eyes.
“Piss off.”
He cracks with a smile—a full Harry smile and I feel my heart beaming just to soak it in.
“Are you doing anything tomorrow?” I ask tentatively. I knew he had the day off too.
“Uhm,” cagey Harry returns. “Maybe. I’m not too sure right now.”
“Ah okay.”
We sip in silence that threatens to smother us. I get up as quickly as I can without wasting my precious drink.
“I’m gonna head back out.”
“Alright.”
I head back to the star-lit room where sleeping bags are laid out like mismatched brick throughout the floor. Some kids are cozied within, others sit on top. They’re all engrossed in the “bedtime story” being told by a local author.
It’s sweet, I think. This would become a core memory for a lot of these kids, drinking in the whole night through all their senses. I wish I had more memories like this. Maybe then I wouldn’t be so fragile all the time.
Adults staying overnight got their own gallery blankets and I drag one over to the far end, enough for any kid who needed assistance could find me but far away that I could be on my phone and not distract them.
Some time later another body joins me with his own blanket.
“Sorry,” Harry says as he sits.
“For what?” I play pretend. Just like these kids were doing tonight. What could you possibly be saying sorry for? What could I possibly feel entitled to you for? We’re just friends.
“For being weird earlier. I…well I have to tell you something and I’m being weird instead.”
My heart begins to thump in my chest.
“Tell me what?”
“So I’ve um…I’ve got a-“ Harry clears his throat. I glance up at him and he’s looking out towards the ceiling. “I have a girlfriend. I know we…we’re not…”
“Jeez Har,” even though ever atom inside of me is keeling over with something I can’t exactly examine yet, I play the joker. The friend. “If this is you telling me you’re getting serious with someone that’s all you have to say.”
“Really?” He turns to me and on the shiny hardwood floor so does half his body. I ignore how his knees feel pressing into mine. “You’re…okay?”
His voice is anything but casual.
“Yeah! It’s not like we’re a thing.”
Even still, I can’t say it. I die a little more.
“Yeah well I wasn’t expecting it. She’s the daughter of someone my dad knows? Pretty sure they orchestrated it but we went on a couple dates and then she asked…well she wanted to be exclusive I…”
“Well that’s good. For you.”
“Yeah?”
“Yep.”
“Thank god,” the air whooshes out of his lungs.
“I feel like I should be offended. You thought I was going to be mad or something?”
“No not mad…” he trails off. I look at his reaction and find him looking at me already. Even though it’s dark I can still see his eyes and they feel like they’re reading everything on my face. In a hushed tone he repeats himself, “not mad.”
I shrug, biting my lip hard to feel something other than the emotions threatening to overwhelm me. Emotions I never thought would surface this strongly.
“I’m good. Actually I’m not good. I think that bottle we found was rubbish I’ve got to go toilet—“ I use his knee to pull myself up. “Save my spot.”
I walk away without sparing a glance back because my act is crumbling. I’m crumbling. And I don’t understand it.
If you asked me two weeks ago I would have gone on how fun it was to be with Harry but how the idea of being with him seriously would be weird. Would throw off our balance. But now I want to puke my guts in the toilet at the idea of having to let him go. Because he’s the one who moved on.
And as hard as I try tears still escape my lashline and make trails down my cheeks as I study myself in the brightly lit mirror. How could I be mad when we were just casual? How could I hate him if all he did was look for something serious. Someone serious.
Suddenly what had felt fun and mature feels childish and disposable.
I was disposable fun.
“Get it the fuck together,” I tell myself. “You’ve got nothing to cry over. You could get yourself a boyfriend too. He’s not your soulmate or something jeez.”
I blow my nose and give myself another pep talk before exiting the toilets back to where Harry waits for me.
“You alright?” He asks. A loaded question.
“Yeah. Regret doing this for the whole night though.”
“You could sleep. I’ll take first shift.”
“I’ll get in trouble.”
“Who gives a shit,” Harry tugs me so that I fall against his shoulder and it’s the worst thing in the world.
I don’t curl my arm through his like I might’ve before. Or cozy into his chest. I stay there like a stiff robot until sleep takes me. Even then it’s not long enough.
—1 month later—
I’m heading home after an uneventful day, ready to sink into bed and turn my brain off. These days my brain talked too much and I really wish there was an on/off switch for it.
“Um hiya?” A soft voice says as I exit the turnstile in the lobby. I turn towards the voice and it belongs to a sweet looking girl about my age with harsh features softened by a layered bob. On me it would look ridiculous but she looks like she was born to rock the style she was in.
“Hi,” the rule of thumb was even though you were clocked out if you exited from the lobby in work clothes and somebody stopped you, you had to help them. I’d forgotten to tuck my badge away today damnit.
“I’m waiting for someone? He hasn’t been answering his texts I was just wondering if-“
“You could ask reception?” I point to the desk behind her. “They can page who you need.”
“They weren’t really helpful,” she shrugs. “I’m assuming you work with him? Harry?”
It’s the last name I’m expecting from her lips. I nearly stumble back trying to take her in again with the new knowledge of who she might be.
“H-Harry?”
I’d heard her the first time. I’m just trying to grasp at a second to collect myself.
This must be his girlfriend. The one who wanted to be exclusive. And I hated that I’d liked her in our two minute interaction.
He hadn’t spoken much about her since he told me a month ago but since half of our relationship before her was being intimate, we barely talked and when we did it was mostly just work and the relationship felt really fragile and rough.
I could see what Harry saw in her—she was attractive. And not pushy; she let Joey at reception push her around which was hard to do. And she was meeting Harry here, at work. It must be getting serious.
All these thoughts race through my mind in a millisecond.
“Oh! Harry yeah,” I nod when she confirms. “Of course I know him. I think he was in a meeting might be why…I can go back in and check if you-“
“Oh no! Sorry I’m not trying to be a bother. You’re probably going home I just wanted to make sure he was still in?”
“Yeah! Yeah he’s in. I’ll tell Joey—reception, to page him if he’s out. He’s nicer than he seems.”
“That’d be perf,” she beams. I die a little more, unsure why I was helping her this much. Unsure why it bothered me this much.
Ever since Harry had ended the thing we didn’t have, my life had felt haunted. The ghosts of every emotion I killed in the moments we’d been together began to surface and they were torture. Biggest of all was regret and shame. Regret over what could have been if I’d just admitted how deeply I felt months ago. Shame because I wasn’t supposed to feel this way for Harry. Because he obviously didn’t feel the same way, he never would, and it would be embarrassing to ever admit it.
Our actual relationship had gone like this after that night—avoidance -> awkward small talk -> light bantering -> finally, being able to talk semi-normally again.
We stopped hanging out outside of work however, so every day I got to see him was a day I was excited to go into work. My friends told me I had to do something about it—confess and see what he says, or move on.
And I’d tried to move on. But every guy I tried to date didn’t hold a candle to the flame that warmed my heart; to the idiot I had the misfortune of falling for after we ended things.
Or maybe I was just the idiot.
And here I was self-sabotaging by helping his girlfriend. There was definitely something wrong with me.
“Elsie!”
Both our heads turn to the voice.
“There he is,” I say but she’s already squeezing my arm and walking towards him. Harry doesn’t realize I’m standing there and I watch him smile at her in a way that sends a spike to my heart. Then he notices me.
“Oh YN,” his eyelids flutter a few times too many. “Uh-“
“YN god sorry I didn’t even get your name,” Elsie turns back to me. “YN was helping me.”
“Yeah? Thanks,” Harry looks visibly relieved and flashes me a grin. I raise my brows and smile back.
Home. I had to get home.
“Well I figured Har already had a hard time finding a girlfriend, I didn’t want him to lose her so quickly. This isn’t even a very big place.”
Harry’s expression is unreadable but Elsie laughs.
“Very funny,” Harry responds.
“I know.” I gear myself up to say bye. “Well I’ll see you tomorrow, let you get to wherever you’re going. It was nice-“
“Well we’re just hanging out with some friends,” Elsie says.
“YN knows a few of them,” Harry says. I watch his eyes bug a little as he realizes he’s stepped onto a minefield and watch him back away smoothly. “Some of the younger crew go out for drinks sometimes.”
“Ah,” Elsie says as Harry wraps his arm around her shoulder from behind. He was laying it on thick but I don’t think Elsie noticed his hiccup. “Well why doesn’t she come!? YN you should join us! One more friend!”
“Oh I don’t think she wants to-“
“I was honestly just gonna go ho-“
I stop talking the same time Harry does.
“No you should!” Elsie says. “Don’t listen to Harry.”
I catch his eye and they’re saying please don’t.
Don’t tell me what to do, mine say.
Don’t be stubborn.
Challenge accepted.
“Ok! Maybe one drink.” I say as Harry huffs. It felt dangerous, having a non-verbal conversation in front of his girlfriend.
I was an idiot, I confirm. An idiot making bad decisions.
“Yay! Let’s go.” Elsie takes Harry’s hand and drags him to the front door. I nearly laugh at his face as he’s dragged past me—he was mad.
And it comes out a couple hours later. By then I’d had more than a single drink, have befriended most of the people I don’t know at the table and have caught up with those I do know. Harry had been mostly attached by the hip to Elsie and I tried not to stare daggers at it.
They’re an interesting couple, you can tell Harry is distracted most of the night and she tries to accommodate by being around and talking to him. He leaves a hand on her at all times but she doesn’t wrap herself around him the way I used to. Maybe she wasn’t touchy.
Maybe I was being obsessive.
So I distract myself with everyone, with drink, with a particularly cute boy who introduced himself as Elsie’s uni friend. Who happened to be brother’s with Harry’s old flatmate. Small worlds.
“YN,” Harry tugs my sleeve as Grant and I talk—if you can call heavy flirting just talking.
“What?!” I snap after the tugging gets aggressive.
“I need to talk,” He points to himself and then me, “to you.”
I could see he was well past tipsy. It wasn’t often Harry drank to this point so I follow him to find out what was going on.
I follow him to a patio table that had just been vacated, empty glasses littering the surface. An untouched shot sits in the middle. The tableau tells a story—art was everywhere.
“What?” I ask.
“What’re you doing?”
“What am I?” I laugh. “What are you doing? I think you’ve had a few drinks too many mate.”
“You’ve got drinks,” he replies.
“Yeah…” I look back at the half finished drink I left at the bar. “I did have more than I thought. I feel like I drink a lot more when there’s a lot of people around? Otherwise I’m just nursing my drink-“
“Why did you decide to come out tonight? When you’ve met my girlfriend.”
Girlfriend.
“When I’ve…what?! Your girlfriend invited me no thanks to you.”
“Yeah but you never come out anymore. And suddenly you want to come out when Elsie asks?”
“What d’you mean I never come out anymore?”
Harry sighs. “You stopped hanging out.”
“Yeah because you got a girlfriend? You stopped inviting me out!”
“No what? No! You’re always…it’s an open invitation I don’t need to specifically invite you out I-“
“So why did you invite me specifically before?” I call him out, feeling more sober than I was a few minutes ago. “You stopped inviting me. We stopped hanging out. And so I stopped inviting you when I went out cuz I thought you had a girl and I didn’t want to make it complicated I-“
My voice catches on an unfiltered emotion and I want to die. I feel heat creep up my cheeks as I try to swallow it down and hope Harry doesn’t notice. Fuck!
“Anyway your girlfriend invited me so I came! It’s not a big deal.”
“I didn’t…” Harry scratches his nose and looks uncomfortable. “I didn’t mean to stop. I…it was complicated and I-“
“It’s fine. Whatever Har.”
“It’s not,” his brows come together. “Obviously s’not. I’m sorry? I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to make you feel…”
I almost laugh at what he’s said and how it sounds: I didn’t mean to make you feel. Well, neither did I.
“Yeah whatever. I’m not mad about it.”
“Sorry.” He says instead.
“Thanks,” I clear my throat for good measure, not wanting to be too emotional. I want to tell him I missed him but I don’t think it would be appropriate.
“I thought-“ he breaks off with a laugh. “Nevermind.”
“What?” I push him lightly. “You know I hate when people don’t finish their thought. It’s going to drive me crazy—what?”
“No this one you won’t like. Nevermind.”
“Tell meee,” I poke his shoulder until he slaps my hand away.
“Stop that! I hate when you do that!”
“I know.” I say smugly. “So?”
“It’s stupid. I thought you came here to annoy me or something. And then you’re practically sitting in Grant’s lap…”
He’s right. I wouldn’t like it.
“Hold on,” I bring my hand down on the table. “You thought I was flirting with Grant to annoy you? Why would I-what!?”
“Like I said,” he doesn’t make eye contact. “It was stupid. Nevermind!”
“No it’s not nevermind. You don’t drive what decisions I make in my love life.” Lie. “Got that?”
“Jeez you can’t get angry after forcing me to say!”
“I can!”
“Can you quit bitching I don’t have time for this.”
“I’ll be as big of a bitch as I want to be.” I cross my arms.
“Unfortunately, I know.”
“That’s a completely stupid thought to have-“
“Surely not all your thoughts are winners. That’s why you don’t say all of them.” Harry says, then laughs. “Actually you do. And I always have the displeasure of hearing all of them.”
My jaw drops. “It’s like you’re purposely saying the stupidest shit right now. Like you want to be a prick.”
“C’mon you little shite,” Harry tugs my arm until they uncross. “I’m joking, remember jokes?”
I want to say something snippy, tell him off, but as my arms fall away his hand slides down until the tips of our fingers brush. It makes me feel touch-starved, like I’d been isolated in the woods for the last two months growing crazy for human touch.
Harry senses the shift and his smile dies down, his throat bobbing up and down.
How was it that Harry, out of every man I’ve ever met and continue to meet, has this effect on me? How can one touch quiet my mind so completely while pushing my heart into overdrive.
Why, I want to ask the universe. Why was it this man in front of me that made me feel so intensely?
“YN,” he says.
I should pull away. I should because his fingers creep further now pressing into my palm. I want them to slide higher until they’re tangled in my hair, pulling me closer. I wanted him closer.
“I missed you,” it comes stumbling out. And the shock of it pulls me out of whatever trance I just found myself in.
I pull my hand away and Harry straightens up, his gaze clearing too.
“Sorry.” My heart is in my throat now. “Sorry. I didn’t—that was inappropriate. I’m gonna go back now…”
“Wait,” he calls out as I head back to Grant knowing my heart wasn’t in it anymore. That I was going home.
“Hm?” I try to blink away the shame as I turn back towards him.
“D-do you…regret anything?”
I raise a brow and he flushes. I was making this torture for both of us but I wanted him to ask.
Stupidly, I wanted him to know.
“Between us. I know we never…we’re just friends. But did you ever regret…us?”
I shake my head. “No. No. Never. It was some of the best times.”
It’s like I’ve said the wrong thing. His face falls and I decide I had to go. Had to. I was afraid what else might be spilled out between us.
I don’t even remember what I tell Grant, just that I grab any of my belongings that I can spot, ask him to throw his number into my phone, and hightail it out. And I nearly make it to the tube when a warm hand grips my arm.
“Get off—oh!” I nearly whack Harry with my purse but he ducks anyway. “What the fuck Har!?”
“Sorry. Sorry sorry!” He lets me go and I miss his warmth. “I didn’t realize!”
“Yeah! You can’t just grab a woman at night like that!”
“Obviously! I wasn’t thinking! I was just trying to get to you-“
“Why?”
“Bloody hell you know why YN!”
I stare at him. His face doesn’t hide a single thought, a single emotion. It’s vulnerable, and terrifying.
“Don’t take the piss.” He grabs my arms and gives me a shake. “You know. You know.”
“I-don’t do this. Har, you have a girlfriend. I don’t want to be that girl ok?”
“Why?”
“Why? Because that’s awful and-“
“No! Why didn’t you say anything when we were together? Any time we were together? When I told you I had a girlfriend? Why were you always so…cool?”
“Me? Cool?” I laugh. “There’s nothing cool about me Har.”
“Well you’re hard to fucking read then! I dunno! I was always leaving hints and signals that I actually liked you. And you always ignored them!”
“Hints? Signals?” I gape. “When the—what the hell do you call hints?!”
“I…I wanted you to meet my fucking parents for god’s sake. Did you really never-“
“If I’m hard to read so are you mate,” I lean against the closest thing—a mailbox. My legs are jelly. “Was that when you vaguely suggested I wake up in your bed while your parents were down?!”
“Fine well I bought you chocolates that one time, I’ve even got some of your tees in my room! I-I tried to plan romantic dates for us—Hampstead! I tried to tell you-“
“What?” I’m not asking him anything. I’m just questioning everything; everything I avoided and played off had meaning. Of course it did. Everything had meaning, but I’d just thrown our dictionary out the window so it would mean nothing. Because I was afraid.
“Really?!” Harry sighs. He crouches down and runs his hands through his hair. “Am I that bad? I thought I was making it so clear but you always brushed it off. I felt like an idiot for falling for you when it was just s’pose to be casual. I thought I was being a bloody simp.”
I inch down to where he crouches.
“You fell for me?” I whisper.
When he looks at me it’s with eyes that look like broken seaglass. With a mouth curved down so low that I want to kiss into a smile. Into a laugh.
He cups my face, his thumb brushing my cheek. I give in to the sigh and his lips lift ever so slightly.
“How could I not?”
“I thought I drove you crazy?” I grasp his hand. “I thought I was just a fun distraction I-“
“I never said the second part.” He interrupts.
“You sure?”
“You were reading the wrong hints.”
I laugh and so does he. It almost turns into tears.
He stands and extends a hand that I take, his warm palm covering mine.
“Now’s when you return the confession,” he says without letting go. “So?”
“What? I’m not hiding any confessions!”
“Liar,” he tugs me close. “Your heart’s racing.”
“That’s from getting up so quickly.”
“You’re full of shite.”
We’re smiling so hard I’m sure we look like crazy people on the street.
But he had a girlfriend. Oh god. A sweet girl I’d just met today.
His expression grows confused as mine must turn to worry. I untangle myself.
“Harry…”
“I know.” He finally clues in.
“We can’t-“
“I know.”
We stare at each other for a heartbeat.
“I’m gonna go. Or else…”
“Just like that?” He asks.
“How else is it supposed to be?” I demand. “We can’t do this Har. And please…if you like her…respect her at all—don’t break up with her just to be with me. I wouldn’t be able to stomach it.”
“Then I’m just lying to her.”
“I…” I shrug. “I dunno. I just don’t want to be the reason for her heartbreak okay?”
“You’re being a sensitive snowflake. Breaking up with her is the right thi-“
“You can’t call people snowflakes-
“I can if that’s what they’re being-“
“I’m going home.” I tell him. It’s the last thing I want to do.
He opens his mouth with whatever quick retort he always had. But he must think twice about it. His face draws into a frown.
“Sort yourself out.” I instruct him. “Just sort it out. And then one day soon we can see…y’know.”
I half turn away, but can’t bear to leave without touching him one last time. Who knows when the next time will be. I flit to him so I can press my lips against the warmth of his cheek, so intoxicating. Like an addict only sniffing the alcohol in their cup. And when I feel his body loosening, about to hold my own, I flit away and rush into the tube without a glance back.
I don’t register anything on the ride home. I’m too shocked to even cry about it.
I wash the day away, the scent of him and the look on his face when he realizes we each had been trying to hold out own glaring neon signs to each other.
It’s late when there’s a knock on my door. I figure it’s my roommate forgetting her keys, and since I’d been laying on my bed in my towel after my shower too numb to sort myself out I end up opening the door basically naked.
It’s Harry.
His eyes roam over my terryclothed figure with a smile.
“What—what are you doing here!?” I grab the edge of my towel to keep it in place.
“Were you expecting someone else?” He asks.
“No-stop!” I push my hand into his chest as he crosses through the doorway. “Why are you here?”
His eyebrows draw together, hurt. “I…I didn’t think I was that drunk—we did just admit our feelings to each other a few hours ago right?”
“Yes but!” I put my hand down because his heart is beating fast under my hand and I don’t want to feel it a second longer. “You were also supposed to sort yourself out and-“
“Can you just let me in?”
I stare at him.
He stares back.
“Fine!” I give up and move aside. He closes the door behind him. That’s when I notice his hands. “What’s that?”
“For you.” He holds a bouquet up. “I know they’re shitty. I couldn’t find much at this time of night-“
“No hold on, I don’t understand.”
“We’ve wasted enough time throwing out shitty hints that apparently neither of us could read. We should never be detectives.”
I stay still, waiting for an explanation. Any bloody explanation as to why he’s here and not with his girlfriend!
“I went back to Elise. She knew something was wrong right away. I tried to deny it. She asked if something was going on between us-“
“God seriously Har! I said not to-“
“Did you want me to go back and pretend to be in love with her when I just had a fucking bomb go off in my life!? I know you don’t want to be that girl YN but I don’t want to be that shitty guy who stays with someone because he feels bad! What does that make me?”
I can picture Elise’s face in my mind. Oh god.
“She wasn’t mad-“
“You wish.” I snort.
“No she wasn’t. Well she was at first because she thought I was with you and her at the same time. I explained. I apologized. She got it. She…turns out she was still hung up over her ex. That she really liked me but she was mostly doing it to get her parents off her back. Because they never like who she dates. Which wasn’t a great thing to hear but…I’m pretty sure I saw her catching a cab as I was leaving. Maybe she went back to her ex.”
I’m dumbfounded with his retelling of what happened after I’d left.
“She’s okay. Are we?” He asks when I don’t reply.
The bouquet looks rough, like it was maybe clutched too hard and the flowers are nearing the end of their life. I imagine Harry rifling through a flower stand to find something for me. Coming here because he couldn’t wait.
I was kidding myself. I couldn’t wait either.
“Okay.”
“Okay??” He asks but he’s closing the distance because he’s reading me. He already knows me.
“Fine.” I say as he loops his arms around my waist. I stretch my arms up around his shoulders, clasping them at his neck. Something throbs deep in my chest. I missed him.
“I missed you,” he says. Always reading my mind.
“I didn’t know I could.” I say to him. His eyes are filled with a raw emotion that mirrors whatever’s aching in my chest.
“You’re like something from the gallery,” he cups my face. “Beautiful and original, breathtaking and you pass by it every opportunity you get just to get another glimpse. It makes you realize what you’ve been missing your whole life.”
“Aw Har,” my voice wobbles. If this was Harry when he was direct and not giving shitty hints I don’t know how I was going to survive us.
“What?” He whispers.
“You’ve got a soft side. You’re not actually a prick.”
His dimples make an appearance as he smiles. “I told you. I’ve just got standards don’t I.”
I wanted all of him—god how did I fool myself this whole time. I wanted all of him. He was just so lovely. “I think you’re going to ruin me,” I whisper back. His grin disappears and he tugs me ever closer.
“You’ve already ruined me.” He says. “I can’t look at any piece of art without thinking of you. I can’t go a day without wondering about you.”
“Is that healthy?” I murmur. My heart drums.
“Who the fuck cares about healthy?” He laughs.
We gaze at each other, the blood rushes through my body at high speeds.
“Mutual ruin?” I ask.
He responds with a kiss so passionate that I forget how to breath. I’m sure my towel was being held up by our bodies at this point.
“Mutual ruin. Or you can just ruin me.” His lips brush against my ear, feather down my neck. “I’m madly in love with you YN. There’s nobody but you.”
I don’t know whether to laugh from giddiness or cry from how my heart overflows.
“Har, I think I get the hint.” I say instead. He laughs.
“Fucking finally.”
💟💟💟💟
#harry styles#harry styles fic#harry styles x reader#writingsfromhome#harry styles fanfic#harry styles imagine#harry styles fluff#harry styles angst#fic#harry styles one shot
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A Coffee Heart pt 3
First Previous Next
" Drake, why are you looking at a civilian's family history "
"The adults are Midwestern villains their secret hero son may be my long lost twin and they also have a daughter but she's mostly fine by herself. We might need to overthrow an entire government branch though"
"Excuse, me"
" You're excused"
After chatting with Danny for a while and getting more information without it sounding like an interrogation also making sure he'll be fine for couple of hours I went digging for the rest of the day.
And oh boy you won't believe what I found.
The Fenton's are fucking wild, after breaking through several firewalls just for the town and then even more for their security I found out 'the haunting world' really means haunted like ghost haunted. These people are the definition of mad scientists proudly stating that they built a portal to another dimension in their basement, and judging by the floor plan right below where Danny sleeps, said portal was letting dangerous ghosts out onto the city, but not all of the ghost are like that though.
The 'echoscientist' are heavily biased when it comes to ghost stating that they are 'nonsenseient' and 'don't feel pain' that they need to be a 'contained' 'experimented on' or even 'eradicated'' which is bullshit and horrifying. It's pretty obvious that there are several neutral and even some good ghosts appearing, most noteworthy being Phantom the hero of Amity Park (I know that majority is painting him as a villain but that is so far from the truth! there is an hour long video of him playing with children at the park helping everyone with daily tasks and more) also it seems pretty clear to me that Lazarus water and ectoplasm are similar in compounds which is frankly something I rather not think about right now.
The Fenton's cause so much property damage it's not even funny. they seem to not care for human lives and their excuse for doing so being 'dangerous ghost in the area' when it's clear that Phantom has it handled they don't even shoot at the attacking ghost they shoot at him which is so wrong on so many levels. the anti-ghost inventions they make seemed to even cause several attacks as well. Phantom already has enough on that his plate with the ghost attacks being 24/7.( Poor guy looks exhausted and burnt out) He doesn't need to have to hide/escape/be afraid from the people he's trying to protect. Hell even the red huntress(another vigilante) makes allies with him then shoots him in the back when the danger is over.
Looking closer at Phantom he has fluffy, soft, and thick white hair that seems to move like it's underwater; piercing, glowing, Lazarus green eyes; body type like Danny's but you can see more of the muscle and shape with his clothing being more skin tight, speaking of clothing he looks like he's wearing a hazmat suit with a symbol(a stylized D with a P in its negative space) postered on it and a utility belt. both the symbol and utility belt were added on later to the original suit which seems to resemble the ones the Fenton adults wear constantly
Actually Phantom looks a lot like Danny in general. . .
And Phantom has been called 'halfa' by some of his rouges. . .
No. . .
OH NO
Phantom and Danny looks so similar because they are the same person!?! after looking at Danny's school absences, tardys, and straight up running out of the class with the ghost attacks they line up
Danny seamlessly shows up with injuries that phanton has gained from Ghost attacks (but they're also injuries that seems to come from something else). Danny is apparently known to run from ghost attacks and as soon as that happens Phantom comes around the corner. Phantom uses Fenton tech that has been modified from the original, which probably he did, another similarity to add between us. . .
Wait I can add being a vigilante/hero as a similarity between us as well!
SHIT! Phantom is a ghost, dead, not living, did my twin brother die at some point!?! Cuz he sure as hell wasn't born like that!?! It must have been the day the portal was open. from what I was able to gather he was the only one home that day and the portal spontaneously worked after failing at first. And about a week later the first official ghost attack happened.
Also what is all this shit about the Anti-Echo Acts and the GIW!?!?! A whole government branch dedicated to the horrendous sayings of the Fenton adults!?!?! It looks like a lot of the Ghost attacks are dying down because it's became too dangerous for them to be out there.
We probably wouldn't have even noticed about all bullshittery with the government and this town in pacifically if if it wasn't for danny coming here.
. . . . .
Danny is here.
He is Phantom.
He said he was forced to be here.
He was forced into leaving his town.
The town that is attacking him at every corner.
With a support system that seems to be nonexistent.
And from looking at the old videos/photos he was learning everything from scratch.
With barely any appreciation for the things he does.
With the government trying to dissect him ( the fuck)
So logically after taking down the government and shutting down the portal if possible ( don't know if Danny needs it or if they environment has changed too much) Amity Park wouldn't need a hero if there's nothing to do there.
plus with their treatment of obvious heroes they could deal with their shit themselves, how does he deal with that I don't know.
They wouldn't mind if Phantom stays in Gotham would they? Probably not.
Oh well
He should probably start that welfare check now he'll do a more thorough investigation with the government later, twin brother priority right now.
" Drake, where are you going? You can't just say all of that and leave! Drake!!"
Yup welfare check
(think I'm getting better at writing shit!)
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Galentines, a 141 drabble.
Just a little fluff for us girlies, happy Galentines!
.........................
"What's all this for?" John asks, as you put another handful of pink and red in the trolley, smile beaming as you deposit chocolates, decorations, and snacks.
"Its Galentines!" You smile, eyes shining.
"The girls and i get together, bring a dish, and watch rom coms or something together, with a few games and snacks. It's my chance to show the love for my girlfriends this year."
John smiled, seeing his birdie radiating happiness always put him in a good mood.
"So what do you need?" He asks, his Captain brain mentally checking off things on a list.
"I have decorations, and sweets, i just need something for the girls to drink, and then i can go home and set up."
Nodding, John turns the trolley to the drinks aisle.
"Want those fancy straws and cups we had for your birthday?" He asks over his shoulder, smirking at the heart eyes you give him.
"Perfect." You reply, throwing your arms around his middle.
./././././././././././././././
"Babe, the girls are over later, can you pass me the baking tray?" You ask Johnny, who was wolfing down his cereal, staring at his phone.
"Johnny!" You say a little louder, startling him.
"What do you need, hen?" He replies, putting his phone down.
"The baking tray, im making those heart pastries for the girls tonight."
He hands you the tray, a furrow in his brow.
"Have i forgotten something?"
You roll your eyes, lately Johnny had been glued to his phone, so probably didn't even hear you talk about your plans.
"Galentines, the party?" You remind him gently.
A look of recognition passes over him, getting out of the chair, he wraps his arms around you, burying his face into your neck.
"M'sorry lovie. Just had a lot on my mind." He apologises, pressing a kiss to your neck.
"Gotta head out early today, need anything for your party?" He asks. You reply with a shake of your head.
With a quick kiss on your cheek, he heads out the door, waving to you from the car.
"Wonder what has him up so early?" You muse.
Little did you know, he's been planning a valentines surprise, and was waiting on the notification on his phone to say it was ready.
./././././././././././././././././././
"The red ones or the pink ones?" Kyle asks, holding out both pairs of shoes from your closet, trying not to stare at you in your pretty outfit.
"I think the red?" You mull over, taking them both and trying them on, walking around your flat.
You and Kyle had been friends for a really long time, so when the opportunity arose that you needed a flatmate, he was the perfect person to ask. Little did you know, he had feelings for you that you matched with your own.
"R-red's good babe." he admits, watching the way the heels made your legs look longer, he wonders what they would look like wrapped around his hips.
You smile, fiddling with the buckles on the ankles before standing up to your full height, even in heels you came up to Kyles chin.
"You look pretty, where are you and the girls headed tonight?" He asks, focusing his gaze on yours.
"The cocktail bar in town, then i think Harriet wants to go to the strip club, they have a male show on tonight." you reply, a little blush fluttered over your cheeks. You wonder what it would be like to have Kyle dance for you.
"Ah, strippers, cocktails, heels.. bad combo, will you need picking up?" Kyle smiles, a dimple flashing in his cheek.
"You read my mind, if you don't mind waiting up?" You laugh, your eyes shining with mirth.
"Let me know when you need me, and i'll be there." With a deep look, you realise Kyle meant so much more than just tonight.
You lean in, the night now charged with a thick tension.
"Promise?" you murmur, eyes not leaving his.
"Promise." He answers easily, before taking you into his arms, pressing a soft kiss on your lips.
./././././././././././././././
"I miss you." You say into the phone, Your face appearing on Ghost's screen.
"I know, love. But I'm home soon." A gruff voice answers.
"Did you get my flowers?"
You smile, panning the phone back to show him the vase and the matching flowers, a mixture of the darkest tulips and lilies he could find.
"I did, and i love them. Thank you." You beam.
"And you are all ready for the girls thing tonight?" He asks, his voice softening as he relaxes in his chair.
"I am, nice to have the girls over, but-" You pause, not wanting to add the the guilt you knew he was feeling already.
"I know, soon." He finishes your sentence for you.
You hear a commotion on his end, and the call drops suddenly, you send him a text to say you will ring him after the girls leave.
You spend the day prepping food, and making sure the house is clean, along to a playlist of all your favourite alternative love songs.
The party is a success, the girls took your mind off Simon for the night, facemasks, a movie marathon and enough snacks to shake a stick at made you appreciate your girlfriends more.
Shortly after midnight, and the last girl had gone, you heard a key in the door, and there he was.. With a massive smile on his face.
"Told ya it would be soon, love." he mumbles into your hair as you pounce on him, pressing kisses all over his face.
"Happy Valentines."
././././././././././././././.
@kaeyasfuturewife @xoxunhinged @muneca-lemon-steppa @gardenof-venus @misshugs @soraya-daydreams @frudoo @renpodz @yesornowaitidontknow @thevoiceinyourheadx @shadowdark00 @rynbeerose @lunamoonbby @incredible-walker @identity2212 @pukbadger @urbimom @corvid007 @wordsfromshona @shadows-empress @m00xy @canyonmooncreations @oniraki @evie-119 @havoc973 @kylies-lover-blog @ishipdabands @cmbghost @heckinspooks @midwesternwitchery @eggy-yoke @redzluvvesage @masterclassofescapism @s-a-v-a-n-a-34 @skeletonsucker
#call of duty#call of duty mw2#fanfiction#fanfic#call of duty modern warfare 2#simon ghost riley#simon riley#ghost#simon riley x you#simon riley x reader#task force 141#taskforce141#john price x reader#john soap mactavish#john price call of duty#john price#kyle gaz garrick#gaz x reader#141#cod#captain price#kyle garrick x reader#galentines#cod galentines#soap call of duty#soap cod#soap x reader
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Ascended Fanboy
inspired by a suggestion from @innermostthoughtsartappreciation
James stood in front of the mirror, disappointed with what he saw. He looked just like he always did — same greasy brown mullet, same patchy neckbeard, same unhealthily pale skin, same flabby body. The only part of him that had changed since he'd last gazed upon his reflection was his brand-new tattoo.
It was a simple drawing of his favorite character from his favorite anime. He'd gotten it in an attempt to stand out — and while it did stand out, it was mostly in a negative way. Evidently, many people found it "distasteful" and "unfit for a member of polite society." It didn't even help him connect with other fans of the anime!
But that wasn't even the biggest issue with the tattoo. No, the real reason James was standing shirtless in front of his bedroom mirror was that the skin around the ill-advised tattoo was rapidly becoming discolored. Starting a few inches from the borders of the tattoo, his vanilla-white skin abruptly transitioned to dark chocolate. Strangely, the tattoo itself also seemed to be affected, the anime girl's blue hair and bulging eyes dissolving into swirling black lines.
"Ugh, I knew there was something funky about that tattoo parlor," James sneered to his extensive collection of cartoon memorabilia, Funko pops, and body pillows.
They, of course, did not respond. They wouldn't have done so normally, because they were inanimate objects, but right now they were slowly but surely fading out of existence, which made things a lot harder for them.
But James didn't notice that tiny little detail, because right before his eyes, the discoloration was starting to spread. Inch by inch, his white skin was darkening, darkening. He rubbed a hand over the changed skin, but it didn't feel any different from regular skin. That probably ruled out skin cancer, at least. Small mercies. Although, come to think of it, he did feel a little tingling at the tattoo site...
That small sensation was all the warning he had before his entire body erupted. He could feel every muscle, every bone in his body rippling and reshaping, from his masculinizing head to his rapidly growing toes. It felt like a swarm of bees had taken up residence inside him, but it was the most pleasurable feeling he'd ever experienced.
He rose in height and shrank in width — but not by too much, because his rolls of fat were being converted into mounds of muscle: Bulging biceps, wide lats, meaty quads... His stomach collapsed in on itself, melting away into a perfect inverted triangle garnished with six cobblestone abs. He still had tits, but now they were pecs instead of moobs.
The changes had mostly avoided James' face, but that would soon be corrected. There was no reason for the Black Adonis he was becoming to have the head of a white geek, after all. Melanating skin and masculinizing muscle converged around his neck and spread up from there. His Adam's apple became more prominent, deepening his voice to a sensual baritone. His lips plumpened up, and his nose flattened out, and a thick black mustache emerged between them. His neckbeard tamed itself into a short, tasteful beard. His hair was undergoing rapid improvements as well — coiling up and receding into his skin until his mullet had been replaced by a textured fade.
Comparatively, the final changes were tame. Stained sweatpants shifted into gym shorts that left nothing to the imagination. A gold chain appeared around his neck, not hanging but resting comfortably in the groove between his pecs. He blinked, and suddenly he had piercings in his ears and nose.
James stared at himself in the mirror, dumbfounded. Where a dumpy, overweight white man had once stood, in his place was a prime specimen of Black manliness. He blinked rapidly, trying to understand what had just happened, but when he opened his eyes again, he was Jamari.
He liked being Jamari a lot better, he realized. Not only was he a rich and famous athlete, but he also had much better taste in tattoos. Better taste in general, Jamari conceded, nodding in approval at his surroundings, which had transformed from a nerd's wet dream to an expensive private gym. His previous body had been optimized for pirating anime and playing Paradox games, but this new one was optimized for working out, winning national championships, and posting thirst traps for his millions of horny followers.
Raising his bicep up to his head, Jamari attempted to find the tattoo that had started it all. But there was no sign of the anime girl, just tasteful calligraphy in the same style as the art engraved in the rest of his body. What was the character's name again? What had she even looked like? He couldn't remember. All his previous nerdy fandom knowledge was fading away, but it had been replaced by expertise in sports, exercise, and celebrity culture — more than a fair trade.
Jamari gave the mirror one last smirk. Damn, he looked fine today. His adoring fans would not be disappointed with what they saw.
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#male tf#male transformation#mental transformation#mental tf#personality change#race tf#race change#racial tf#racial change#nerd to jock#jock tf
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Clueless | H.Z.
Pairing: Hange Zoë x reader Summary: Your research partner, Hange, is clueless about romance. Or so you thought. Content: just fluffy research partners trope A/N: i survived college hell week so here you go. HVD HANGE LOVERS!!
"I didn't know you could walk slower," you remarked as Hange strode beside you.
Early training was exhausting, coupled with the paperwork you have to handle after. Just thinking about it drains your energy.
Your ever-energetic Section Commander only beamed at you and responded, "Well, I have to match your pace more often now."
"Why is that?"
"Since we became research partners?"
Your head racked in confusion, gaze snapping back to them.
"Research partners? Since when?"
"I knew you still haven't read Erwin's notice," they said matter-of-factly, pulling a folded sheet of paper from their uniform. "He thinks your works are impressive and said we should work together on a new trapping device."
"That... sounds exhausting..."
"Right! Exciting, isn't it?" Hange smiled, too deep in their excitement that they misheard you. You can never keep up with that amount of enthusiasm, try as you might.
After pulling an all-nighter last night to organize files, your commander now wants to transfer you to the thinking team. Great.
"When are we going to start?" you asked Hange.
-
It turns out that working closely with Hange would present unexpected issues. You have no problem with Hange or the work itself as being with them brightens your day more than you cared to admit. Sometimes you wonder why they're so good at making you smile and laugh even at the face of mathematical formulas and complex design structures but that's a question for another day. Your real musings lie on the question of why they're so clueless about people hitting on them. Surely, the box of chocolates left on their desk with hearts scribbled all over it or the cadets swooning over them when they passed by the corridor weren't just people being friendly as Hange always liked to think.
This present issue became more clear when Valentine's Day arrived. To think that your lot makes time to celebrate this event is amusing. You were with Hange the whole time that day, brainstorming and sleepless that you almost forgot about the day of love happening just outside your doors.
"What if we try it? You know, outside?" Hange offered, sipping on their fifth mug of coffee. "See if it works?"
"Hange, it's a long-range weapon. And there are people outside," you muttered sleepily, yawning as you walked towards the window to allow some sunlight in. You drew the curtains and looked down. "People celebrating apparently."
"For what?" Hange asked absentmindedly, busy scribbling down a few ideas that you probably have to illustrate later.
"Dunno," you yawned again, drawing the blinds back. "I'm sleeping. You can't stop me."
"Go ahead," they said, thumb pointing at the bed. "I'll wake you up later."
-
When Hange woke you up about an hour later, you hid under their pillows and bargained for another five minutes of sleep.
"No, silly, we're not going to work. I brought something," their voice came, lifting the pillows you're hiding on.
Their brown eyes beamed at you, holding up something as your vision cleared.
Chocolate?
No, not just that. They've got an armful of it.
"Where on earth did you get all of that?"
"Outside the door," they muttered, opening one to munch on it. They offered you one. "Surprising, huh?"
"Well, it's Valentine's Day." You only remembered about a minute ago.
"It is?" Their eyes widened momentarily. "I thought it's tomorrow."
You laughed softly, taking a chocolate from their hand. "We've been staring at plans all week, we didn't know."
"About time," they spoke, sitting on the spot next to you. Their eyes met yours and for a moment, you were tempted to look away as if gazing any longer will melt you in a puddle. It's not helping that they seemed to enjoy looking at you more than anything else recently. "Let's have dinner. There's a new dinner just outside the quarters."
"Did, uh, did we miss dinner downstairs?"
"Yeah... I forgot about it." A sheepish grin crossed their face. "Doesn't matter, though. It's only 9 PM."
-
It turns out that diners were occupied that day, couples swarmed the place as the buttery scent of baked goods wafted in the air. After the long queue, you managed to take back four sandwiches which you ate in your shared room.
Hange sat on the bed next to you, scribbling equations, crossing them out, and starting over again. It was adorable how their brows crease when they think.
"Hange?"
"Hm?"
"Shouldn't you sleep?"
They smiled, "Later."
"Happy Valentine's Day," you mumbled sleepily, curling up next to them.
"You too." Hange's gaze lingered on your sleeping form, thinking of the reservation for two they booked yesterday.
They stayed up late that night, writing down equations, and dimming the lamp to allow you some sleep. They were asleep until afternoon slumped over their papers which you diligently put away when you woke up that morning. You only understood half of what was written, guided by Hange's short annotations on the page. It warmed your insides, knowing that Hange wrote these equations for your designs. The invention you're both working on felt more feasible and easier to envision.
-
"It's working well, Commander," you reported to Erwin later that day when he asked about the device's progress.
"It must have been, huh? Hange knows how to gather a great team," he smiled amicably. "They specifically requested for you."
Your cheeks heated up, smiling warmly even on your way out of Erwin's office.
Hange was waiting in the corridor, notebook discarded and eyes lighting up when they saw you. They half-run in your direction, energetic and beaming as always as though they had enough sleep.
"Ready to go?" They asked, walking beside you.
"Where?"
That same charming smile you always notice creased their cheeks.
"Maybe the diner has a seat for two this time."
#hange zoë#hange zoe#hanji zoë#hanji#hanji zoe#hange snk#hange x y/n#hange x reader#hange x you#hange zoe x reader#hange zoe x you#hange zoe x y/n#hange aot#aot x you#hanji zoe x reader#hanji x reader#hanji x you#hanji x y/n#aot hanji#aot fanfiction#aot x reader#attack on titan#shingeki no kyojin#snk fanfiction#snk#14dyh-writes
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Second chapter!! Happy Valentine's day <3
Bruce finds you at work and doesn't leave you alone.
< first chapter
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The next day at work, it all feels like a fever dream. Did you really meet Bruce Wayne? And talk to him all night? You feel a bit nauseous just thinking about it, but you just remind yourself that you'll never see him again. Even if you did get along really well...
Whatever, you'll just daydream about kissing him in the moonlight, that's just as fun as the real thing, right? Not that you could compare it to the real thing, you'd have to kiss someone at some point to know what it's like.
Maybe you should have kissed Bruce yesterday, he certainly seemed like he would have been ok with that, but that was probably just wishful thinking anyways. Oh well, too late now.
The bell that lets you know somebody entered the store rings and rips you out of your thoughts. Fuck. You hate when there's costumers, which is why you chose to work at the shittiest bookstore in Gotham. And are hiding in the back.
You're supposed to say something like "I'll be right with you!", but you're not going to do that. You hate talking loudly. Especially to strangers, especially when you can't even see them. But you never even say anything when you're out in the front and making direct eye contact with them, so whatever. You just hope they won't ask you for help with finding anything, just having to ring them up is bad enough...
Why do you have to get costumers at all? Fuck, you should really look for a job with less contact to people, but this is the best you've been able to find so far.
You reluctantly leave the safety of the back room, only to find a guy in an oversized hoodie and sunglasses absolutely beaming at you. Why is he looking at you like that? Should you know him?
Only when he takes the sunglasses off do you realize that it's Bruce. No way, how did he find you? You feel your palms getting sweaty.
"Finally! I found you! Do you know how hard it was to find this book store with the minimal description you gave me?"
Not hard enough, apparently, considering that he was able to find you this soon. It hasn't even been a full day!
He's still smiling at you. "I've been to multiple book stores this morning! I'm so glad you told me you'd be working today, or I would have had to ask everyone if you're one of their coworkers!"
"Yeah, well, if I had wanted you to show up here, I would have given you more details, probably." You deadpan, hoping your voice isn't shaking.
He's not deterred, he just keeps talking as if you hadn't said anything: "Wanna get lunch with me? When's your break? We could go to that café around the corner that I saw on my way here!"
Is he not getting that you don't want him here? Well, you do want him here, but you don't. You want him to think you don't want him here so he'll leave before you can embarrass yourself.
"I can't leave for my break, I have to stay here. I'm the only one working right now, I can't just- just lock up and get something to eat." Your boss actually allowed you to do just that, but when you came back from doing it the first time, an angry costumer was waiting for you and yelled at you for 10 minutes about how it's rude to just close the store in the middle of the day. You don't want a repeat of that, so you started eating your lunch at work whenever there were no costumers. Which is almost always, luckily.
"I could go get you something and we can eat here! It doesn't seem like you get a lot of costumers so we won't even be disturbing anyone!" Why is he so persistent? Can't he go talk to some supermodel or something?
"I'm not hungry." You kind of are, actually.
"That's fine, we can just talk! I just wanted to spend some time with you. You know, I haven't clicked with anyone like this in a long time, I couldn't just let you go."
Wait, is he serious? Well, why else would he go through the effort of looking for you... But still, you can't quite believe it. Are you being pranked?
"You should go. What if costumers start showing up? I'm sure you don't want some weird fan to recognize you."
Bruce ignores what you say and stays. He talks to you for about half an hour, well, mostly he talks at you, until he has to leave because his lunch break is over. You just stand there, perplexed. Does he really want to hang out with you?
He returns the next day. And the next. And the next. Every day, always during his lunch break. It takes a few times until you stop trying to ignore him, a few more times until you start actually talking to him, and a few more times until you agree to eat lunch with him. Not go anywhere else, just eat your own lunch at the bookstore.
You can't stop yourself from trying to push him away a little bit, though.
You put down your fork. "You know, it's rude of you to keep visiting me at work, where I can't just leave. This is basically harassment."
"If you want me to go, I'll go. Just say so, and I'll never show up here again, I promise."
You don't want him to leave. Well, you do, because you don't want to get even more attached, but you don't, because, well, you're getting attached. You can't bring yourself to make him leave.
You huff and roll your eyes. "Whatever." You pick your fork back up and continue eating.
He tries to suppress a smile. Gross. He's so cute.
Whenever he catches you playing a silly game on your phone (which is basically every time he enters the store, as you love slacking off), he insists on befriending you on it if possible, so when you're not hanging out he'll send you a booster on your candy-crush-esque game, or play against you on a quiz app.
Sometimes he uses the chat option there to tell you to go to sleep when it's late and he catches you playing, even though he's obviously awake as well! Hypocrite. It makes you smile every time.
One day while you're eating lunch together, a few months after he first showed up, he puts down his fork and says: "I think I need to make this more clear. I am interested in you romantically. I want to date you."
You almost spit out your lunch, but manage to swallow it without choking. "H- Wh- Huh? What?"
"We can just be friends, I'd love to be friends, we already are friends, in my opinion, but I would also love to date you. So if one day you decide that you want to date me, please let me know."
You already want to, but you will absolutely not be informing him of that, thanks. Asking for what you want? What are you, a well adjusted person? You blink owlishly at him instead of saying anything. That should suffice as a response, right? No, you should probably say something.
"...Look, even if I was interested in dating you—", which, again, you literally are, but why would you tell him that;
"—you're famous, and at some point it would come out that I was dating you, and the paparazzi would publish one single picture of me and I'd immediately panic so hard I would pass out and die. This—" You point your fork between the two of you. "—is already risky enough. Whatever this is, anyway."
Bruce, as always, chooses not to address the parts of what you were saying that were clearly your anxiety speaking and simply grins.
"So you do want to date me? It sounds to me like you're just looking for excuses. Don't worry, if I don't want anyone to know about you, noone will! People don't tend to recognize me when I'm not wearing a suit, especially in environments where they're not expecting me, so anywhere outside of my workplace and fancy parties. It's worked so far, hasn't it? Not a single person has recognized me here! Dating won't change that. So, if you do want to go on a date with me, just say the word. Please."
What word? Wait, he means that metaphorically, right? No, but seriously, what would you say, how would you say that without sounding totally weird?
"That's not what I was saying. At all. Stop misinterpreting me." You roll your eyes at him. He changes the topic, but he keeps smiling until he has to leave.
Lying awake that night, you think about what he said. Does he actually like you? Or is he just pretending, because he likes a challenge? Knew you'd be difficult to get close to, and he gets a kick from being someone's first relationship, kiss, everything, and then leaving them? You feel nauseous and you suddenly feel cold. How are you supposed to figure this out? You try to tell yourself that it's only your anxiety speaking, that Bruce is actually a nice person and wouldn't do that, but you can't quite convince yourself.
The next day, your way home after work (and after pretending your conversation with Bruce yesterday didn't happen, which luckily he played along with), you see something on the ground that reflects the light in a way that catches your eye.
What is that? It's kind of hidden behind a trash can.
You take a step closer, hoping it's not some kind of trap, but you can't think of a villain who would hide shiny things on the floor to kill civilians. At least not in that color, the Joker would make it colorful, and this object appears to be... black?
Oh, it's a Batarang! You've never seen one up close, but they can't be super rare with how often people online post about having found one, there's even one guy who collects them and has an entire wall plastered with them. Allegedly. People online are saying that most of them are probably replicas, but you can't tell, as you've never seen a real one. Until now.
That makes you think, just how many Batarangs does Batman have? More than enough if he let's random people keep them. You think about picking it up and taking it with you. It would be really cool to have a Batarang...
You reach out towards it, but stop right before you touch it. Is it stuck in the floor? Fuck, just how sharp are those things...?
Maybe you should leave it here, you'd just cut your hand open on it, trying to get it unstuck.
Plus, maybe Batman will find this one if you leave it here, and then re-use it! Reduce, re-use, recycle, Batman!
You leave it where you found it, after taking a few pictures of it as proof.
The next day, Bruce asks you if you did anything interesting yesterday, like he does every time he sees you. Usually you'd say no, but you did find that Batarang... Would Bruce care about that?
While you're contemplating, Bruce says: "You'd have said no by now if nothing had happened! Come on, please tell me?"
Fine! Whatever! You'll tell him, even if he'll probably think it's boring.
"Ok, so, on my way home yesterday... I found a Batarang. And, um, it got me thinking, well, first of all, how many of those does that guy have? If he's just leaving them lying around like that, right? Oh, and, it was so sharp, it was stuck in the floor, though I guess maybe that just means Batman is really strong? Either way, I thought he doesn't kill, right, but considering what he's working with it's a miracle no criminal has ended up dead yet, right?" You stop rambling, realizing that Bruce hasn't said anything yet. At least he appears to be amused.
"You have a lot of thoughts about Batman, huh?" He grins. "Yeah, he must have tons of those things, I've seen the posts. Did you take it with you?" He didn't respond to your killing thoughts... Oh well, you did give him a lot of information all at once.
"No, I didn't... But I thought about it! I mean, it seems like that's what everyone else is doing, but with it being stuck in the floor like that I was worried I would cut my hand open trying to get it unstuck! And with my luck there would have been germs or poison on it and my wound would have gotten infected, like, immediately, and I would have died. So I left it there for Batman to hopefully find again. I mean, he should probably be reusing the ones he already has, right? Reduce, reuse, recycle, I'm just helping Batman be more climate friendly!" There you go, rambling again.
Bruce seems almost too amused at all of this.
"Well, do you want it? I can come with you when your shift is over and help you get it unstuck, if you want. If nobody else has already taken it. I'm sure Batman won't mind. And if it ever comes out that he's not trying his best to be climate friendly, I'll personally go kick his ass, I promise."
"Uh. Um. You don't have to do that!"
"...Kick his ass or go get the batarang for you?"
"I meant getting the batarang, but also please don't fight Batman. He'd wipe the floor with you. No offense."
"Well, first of all, I think I'm just as strong as Batman-" You roll your eyes at him. Dork.
"And second of all, I don't have to get it for you, but I want to. Please let me?"
Ok. Fuck. Whatever. This is the first time you'll be seeing him outside of work, excluding your first meeting.
"Uh. Ok? I, um, my shift ends at 8."
"I'll pick you up in front of the store, then. It's a date!"
"Uh! No, well, yes, but, it- um-"
"I'm just teasing you." He winks at you. Winks! Is he trying to kill you? You turn your face towards your food so you don't have to look at him. Asshole. Stop being so hot.
Later, at 8, he's already waiting for you in front of the store while you're locking up.
"Ready to go?" He smiles.
"Uh, yeah! Sure!"
You start leading the way to where you found the batarang, talking about whatever comes to mind on the way.
Finally, about halfway on your way home, you reach the place where the batarang should be. You hope it's still there, but somebody else could have taken it. You push the trashcan it was behind to the side, and...
There it is!
"Look, it's still here!" You turn around to Bruce, smiling. He smiles back. You fight the urge to giggle or hide your face behind your hands, he needs to stop being so cute.
"Didn't you say it's stuck in the ground? Why wouldn't it be here anymore?"
"Uh, you said you'd help me get it out? Somebody else could have done the same thing!"
"Right. But they don't have my getting batarangs unstuck from the ground skills."
You roll your eyes. How often could Bruce have come in contact with a batarang? His only advantage compared to you is that he's stronger and not afraid of cutting his hand open. At least that's what you think.
You watch as he grabs the batarang and gets it unstuck in seconds. Seriously? It was that easy?
"Woah. I think I would have been able to do that myself, that looked super easy. Sorry to have made you come all this way..." Apparently it wasn't stuck in there as much as you thought? Even if a considerable part of it disappeared beneath the ground. Hm. Weird. Maybe there was a batarang shaped hole there before it landed there? Or Bruce is just a lot stronger than he looks.
"No, I'm glad I came along! I wouldn't have wanted you to cut yourself accidentally." He wraps the batarang in a piece of fabric. Some kind of rich people tissue, maybe.
"Let me carry it home for you?" He looks at you in a way that makes you melt a little bit. Ok, fine.
"Oh, uh, sure!" You did enjoy walking around with him. And not just because walking with someone in Gotham is safer than doing it alone.
"Also we could maybe order dinner? And eat together at your place?" And let him into your apartment that's not cleaned up? That looks shitty even when it is cleaned up?
"Don't push it."
"Or we could go somewhere? I'll pay, of course."
And absolutely embarrass yourself and make him never want to see you again and talk about you to journalists that you're a horrible person, which gets published in every newspaper ever so you have to move and change your name? Ok, maybe that was a bit dramatic.
Bruce can clearly see the anxiety on your face.
"It doesn't have to be a date, if you don't want that."
Be brave! Be brave! You can do this!
"Uh." You almost choke on your words. "And... if I do... want that...?"
You might actually pass out, this is horrible. If he doesn't respond in less than a second, your flight response is going to win and you'll run away. And quit your job, so he can't find you again.
"That would be wonderful! We can take it slow, ok? Absolutely no pressure to do anything you don't want to do whatsoever, I promise."
You nod, not feeling brave enough to say anything. Maybe those were your last words ever.
"So... Dinner at your place? As a date?"
You nod again. Shit, fuck. Are you actually going to date Bruce Wayne? What were you thinking? Wait, does going on one date even mean you're 'dating' him? What's the definition here?
You start walking again, leading Bruce to where you live. If he hates your apartment and leaves and you never see him again that's fine and you'll be able to handle it, right? But that won't happen, so calm down. But if it did happen, you'll be fine and ok and fine. It's fine! Oh fuck, what if you misunderstood him? Did he even mean dinner tonight? Are you embarrassing yourself by assuming he'll come with you right now?
Bruce walks right beside you and starts talking again.
"I'll order. What do you want?" While saying this, he puts an arm around your shoulder. You tense. Woah.
"You said you'd take it slow!" Look at that, you can talk again.
"Too much?" Yes. But also no. But yes. But no.
"I don't know! Maybe?" He takes his arm away and you can breathe again, but somehow at the same time you miss his warmth.
"Don't worry, I'll take it so slow. The slowest. You won't regret dating me, I promise. This'll be so much fun, you'll see." He smiles.
You don't know about that, but you do know that at the very least it'll be interesting. You hope he won't notice you looking up what the definition of dating is on your phone while he's ordering food later.
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been seeing a bit more discourse on here about whether heian era sukuna would have concubines so…
culturally speaking, yes i do believe it’s entirely plausible since concubines were a thing back then. we even see yorozu mention she doesn’t want sukuna to have concubines if they get married
the only reason I think he wouldn’t have them is because of sukuna’s personality as gege has written him- the key aspect here which ive said before and will say again is that i do believe he is canonically asexual. why? if a man like sukuna had a sexuality he would be a MENACE. sukuna does things entirely for his own pleasure, he clearly likes to eat and sex isn’t a very far off indulgence from food (imo). i also think he would use sex to assert his power/authority as well. but gege is not that type of author, and so for the sake of jjk, i would say sukuna is written like he’s asexual.
now if he did have a sex drive and in this case let’s just say he’s straight, i do think it wouldn’t be crazy he’d have concubines. people argue he can barely stand yorozu so he’d be too annoyed to have all those women around him, and yes true, but as it’s written in a lot of fics with this concubine set up, the women exist solely for his pleasure— their lives don’t mean anything to him beyond what’s necessary (sex) and so for that reason im assuming the average heian era concubine of sukuna would go to great lengths to be deferential and take care not to bother him, understanding his ruthless nature
the only other likely reason i could think of if heian era sukuna was NOT asexual, is that he didn’t have that kind of noble estate setup to keep concubines around. but he was shown to have a himuro which were expensive back then and pretty much only owned by nobility. and if he had an ice house, that meant he stored food and was probably settled somewhere. so i dont think it would be too insane to stretch it so that he had an estate as well.
the point is, if we stuck completely to the canon version of him it would simply be no fun
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My valentine forver- Jude Bellingham
5 years old
"Y/n I want to ask you something" Jude said as we were playing together during lunchtime
"What is it Judey?" I asked
"Will you be my valentine?" He asked
"Sure but what's that" I said
"I don't really know but my mummy and daddy keep talking about a Valentine's Day and being each others valentine so I guess it's just something best friends do" he said
"Ok I'll be your valentine as long as you push me on the swings" I said
"Deal let's go" he said grabbing my hand to help me up
~~~~~~~~~~
"Hey sweetheart how was your day?" My mummy asked when she picked me up after school
"It was good Jude asked me to be his valentine" I said
"He did what?" She exclaimed
"He said its something best friends do and he's my best friend so now we are each other's valentines" I said
"That's exciting we'll have to talk to Jude's parents about that" she said
9 years old
For what feels like the first time in forever it's nice enough for us to be allowed outside at break time. Me and my friends all wanted to play football with the boys as they always think they are so good but we think we are just as good. There wasn't enough of us to make a full team to play the boys but we drew straws and organised ourselves into two teams. I ended up on the same team as Jude which is what I was secretly hoping for as we've played together before and we worked really well together so I was happy to get to play with him again.
The years of friendship mean that Jude and I are pretty in tune with each other especially on a football pitch. Today was no different we didn't really need anyone else on our team as we both managed to run round the kids on the other team and pass back and forth until the ball went in the back of the net. It was so much fun but most importantly I was glad to make the other girls proud as maybe now the boys will take us seriously and let us play with them more often. Sadly we didn't get to gloat for too long as the bell rang meaning we had to go back to class. On the way back in I went to grab my water bottle but before I could Jude grabbed it for me as his was right next to mine.
"You played great out there you should really join a team" Jude said
"My mum won't let me she says I can't do both football and dance and I'm committed to dance this year but maybe next year I'll do football" I said
"Maybe you can join my club and we can play together" he said
"That would be fun" I said
"Wait y/n before we go into class I need to ask you will you be my valentine?" He asked
"I'm sorry Jude I just don't like you like that I like being friends but that's it I'm sorry if that hurts your feelings" I said running off to go back into class
Jude looked a little sad for the rest of the day which made me feel awful but I just don't like him that way in fact I don't like any boys that way because that's gross. I like our friendship we play together at school and he's taught me a lot about football but that's it nothing else.
13 years old- Jude's POV
Come on Jude you can do it. It's not that difficult just say the words. What's the worst that could happen. Well she could say no but she's done that before and I survived but this time it feels different we aren't 9 anymore and dating isn't something to be sneered at anymore. Being rejected now will probably hurt a lot more but I can't be thinking about that or else I'll chicken out for like the 5th time.
I've had a crush on y/n for years but this past year it's only gotten worse. She's just so beautiful I can't stop myself from staring at her from across the room when we are in class together. I'm not the only one who has a crush on y/n all the guys in our year and even some in the year above are always talking about how pretty she is. I'm not as popular or as attractive as some of the guys who also like y/n but I'm hoping that after our many years of friendship she'll feel the same as me and if I can ask her first then I think I stand a good chance, at least that's what I'm telling myself.
After school today we have football practice and y/n will be there as she plays with the team when she's allowed as the school doesn't have a girls team. I made sure to get changed quickly so I could be the first one out there so as soon as y/n was ready I could ask her out as we warm up. As she made her way outside she was talking to one of the other guys in the team Jack and she had a big smile on her face which isn't unusual but it did make me a little nervous.
"Hey Jude" she said as she came over
"Hi you seem extra happy today what's going on?" I asked
"Jack just asked me out so we're going to go on a date this weekend as long as my parents let me but they like Jack so I'm confident" she said
"Oh wow I didn’t know you liked him" I said trying not to give away my disappointment
"I've liked him for a while but I never told anyone a I only ever get teased for saying I like anyone so I kept it to myself" she explained
"Well I'm happy for you" I said completely lying
It really broke my heart that she's with someone else but I really should've seen it coming she's the prettiest girl in school it was only a matter of time before someone asked her out. That doesn't mean it hurts any less but I'll get over it and at least we are still friends even if she can't be my girlfriend I can still hang out with her.
15 years old - Your POV
Maybe love just isn't for me. I've been with two guys over the last few years and both have cheated on me with one of my friends so I've lost a lot of friends but luckily I still have Jude. Since all the drama I spend a lot more time with him as I know he won't betray me and there's no drama surrounding him which is exactly what I want I don't care about being popular and having lots of friends anymore I just want true friends. I call Jude my friend but that's not really how I feel about him after spending more time together I realised that I truly enjoy Jude's company in a way I've never enjoyed being around anyone else. I'm not entirely sure when my feelings started to change but it must've been before my last boyfriend cheated on me as it hurt but I wasn't as upset as the first time because I just wasn't as emotionally attached anymore.
I've had many chances to tell Jude how I feel but I just haven't been able to make myself do it. I'm not stupid I know there was a time when pretty much all of the guys in school had a crush on me Jude included but I don't know if he feels the same now. He used to get awkward around me which is what gave him away but he doesn't act like that anymore which makes me think that he doesn't like me that way anymore. Jude has been such a good friend to me since we were 5 but especially the last few years we are always together whether it be at lunchtime in school or kicking a ball around down the park at the weekend. I value our friendship so much that I can't bring myself to tell Jude how I feel, the possible rejection isn't worth our friendship to me.
I've put my feelings aside for a few months now but as it's approaching Valentine's Day and I hear my friends talking about that their boyfriends are doing for them it makes me a little sad and maybe a little jealous that I don't have that with Jude. In a completely genius move I'm spending the next few days with Jude helping him get some extra training in as he's playing a big match soon and he wants to play well and he likes to test his skills against me. Our plan is to go straight from school to the park where they have football pitch we can play around on until it gets dark.
~~~~~~~~~~
"You're going to do great in that match you are definitely too much for me to be able to keep up with" I said
"You're still coming back from injury though" he said
"You still beat me fair and square like a million times trust me you've got this" I said
"Do you have any plans Sunday?" He asked out of nowhere
"Thats Valentine's Day right definitely no plans for that day" I laughed trying to make a joke of how sad my love life has been
"Then would you like to go on a date with me?" He asked
"What" I said completely in shock
"That was stupid I'm sorry forget I ever said that" Jude panicked
"No I would love to go on a date with you the question just took me by surprise I had no idea you still felt that way about me" I said
"Wait, still you knew I had feelings on you" he said
"Yeah you weren't exactly subtle a few years ago but now you are definitely better at hiding your feelings I had no idea you still liked me" I explained
We laughed about it before actually planning our date after texting our parents to make sure they'd be willing to take us and make the reservation at the restaurant we wanted to go to for us as we aren't actually old enough to do that. On the way home from the park I couldn't stop smiling thinking about going on a date with Jude after all these years of friendship and feelings on both sides but never at the same time. When we got to my house Jude grabbed my hand and leaned in to kiss my cheek which made me blush like I've never blushed before but it felt right being with Jude in this way.
19 years old
I'd have never guessed that the airport would be so busy on Valentine's Day but I guess it makes sense with people going away or going to visit long distance partners which is what I'm doing so I guess I'm part of the problem. Since Jude went to Germany our relationship has changed quite a lot but we are still just as happy as before. Originally I was supposed to move with him and join Dortmund's women's team but I tore my acl over a year ago and haven't been able to play again since so instead I opted to go to university instead. Last year we couldn't be together to celebrate so we had a date over FaceTime but this year I'm surprising Jude as he has no idea I'm coming. With the help of some of his teammates who I knew well from coming to visit as much as I can I've planned dinner at a nice restaurant and then we are going to a show at a nearby theatre but most importantly I'm going to Jude's apartment to wait for him to come home from training to surprise him with it all.
My flight landed a bit late but I got through the airport quickly so I managed to get to the apartment with about half an hour to spare before Jude is due home. I spent my time freshening up a bit and setting out the presents I got him on the coffee table. When I heard him opening the door I got up and ran to hide somewhere to really make it a surprise. He came in and saw what I'd left for him on the coffee table and started to read the card which is when I came out from the room I was hiding in and snuck up until I could sit next to him. I managed to make him jump then he just stared at me and didn't say anything.
"What are you doing here?" He asked when he was able to speak
"I thought I'd come and surprise you as we didn't get to spend valentines together last year" I said
"I've missed you so much I'm so happy you're here" he said
"I'm here for a few days so we can spend plenty of time together but tonight I have things planned for us so we need to get ready in an hour" I said
"What have you planned?" He asked
"We are going to dinner at that restaurant that you said is really nice and then afterwards we are going to the local theatre to watch a show" I said
"That sounds amazing I'm so impressed you've managed to pull this off" he said
"I had a bit of help so hopefully it all goes to plan" I said
"As long as I get to be with you it doesn't matter what goes wrong I'll have a good time" he said
21 years old - present day
The last year or so has been a rollercoaster once Jude moved to Madrid and settled in I joined him to do my masters degree instead of staying home for another year. Because of all this last year we didn't celebrate valentines at all really as Jude was away for a game and I had exams but this year he's promised me he's going to go all out to make up for it. I have no classes today so Jude booked appointments for me to get my hair, nails and makeup done so all I have to do is pick an outfit when I get home which is already a lot but he made sure to make it clear that this is only the beginning.
My first appointment was my hair appointment so I just got a trim and got it styled then came makeup which I left up to the makeup artist as she definitely knows better than I do. I already looked so much better just after that but I still had one more appointment. Jude remembered where I like to go to get my nails done so he booked the appointment with the girl I always go to so we got to catch up as it's been a while since I've had someone other than me do my nails. Usually I have ideas of what I want to do but this time I didn't so she suggested some someone French tips so that's what we did. My nail girl is good but today she took extra care in making sure they were perfect and wouldn't let me leave until she was happy but it was so worth it.
After all of my appointments I felt really good about myself even more so when I got home and got dressed in the dress I decided I wanted to wear. Jude also put on his outfit which he looked so good in so I insisted that we take pictures together before we leave as we never both look this good one of us is always having a bad hair day so we have to take advantage of both feeling good about ourselves. After taking pictures Jude told me we needed to leave as there was a car waiting outside for us which was I was expecting to just be an Uber or something but it was actually a really fancy car. The driver greeted us and offered us glasses of champagne which is definitely not what I was expecting but Jude did say he was going to go all out so I should've seen it coming.
The car took us to a really nice restaurant which surprisingly wasn't too busy despite it being Valentine's Day. The place was definitely decked out for the occasion as there were candles on all the tables and lots of roses all around including a few rose petals on each table. Dinner was lovely all of the food was amazing and we had a great time but that wasn't all Jude had planned so we got back into the car which took us to this beautiful park in the city. As it was dark no one else was around so we walked around for a bit and then made our way to the big lake in the middle of it.
I was enjoying the view looking at the reflection of the moon in the water when I felt Jude's hand slip out of mine so I looked over to see if he was ok. When I did I saw him down on one knee holding a ring box. I really didn't expect Jude to propose tonight so I was shocked but also incredibly happy as he truly is the love of my life so getting married to him is something I've dreamed of a lot. Jude grabbed one of my hands while my other one went to wipe the tears that were falling down my face completely out of my control.
"Y/n since we met when we were little kids we've had a connection that I've never experienced with anyone else and when we started dating I realised I was the luckiest person on earth get to be with my best friend and soulmate now I think it's time to ask if you'll marry me and be my valentine forever" he said
"Y-yes of course I'll marry you" I managed to stutter out as he slid the ring on my finger
"Thank god I was so nervous you'd say no" he laughed
"Why would I ever say no" I said
"I don't know I was just worried you'd think this is too much or a bit corny to do it on Valentine's Day but this day has been important throughout our relationship so it felt fitting to get engaged on the day we had our first date all those years ago" he said
"Its perfect it means so much to me that you thought so much about it that's what I really care about" I said
"I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you" he said
"Me too" I smiled
#jude bellingham x reader#jude bellingham imagines#jude bellingham imagine#jude bellingham#football imagine
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