#he makes absurd amounts of money and lives in a one room apartment where most furniture includes cinderblocks

[circus-k]

when i say bro strider is the most versatile character in all of media™ i mean it. you could do basically anything with him and i wouldn't bat an eye

[lady-literature]

Accidental Crime Boss Marinette

Okay so,, I have this AU in my head, right? (not surprised) and I’m lacking any real direction for it (still not surprised) but it basically goes like this:

Marinette moves to Gotham.

She’s drawn there for whatever reason and the kwami are saying something about balance and being a Guardian and her sacred duty and something but Marinette isn’t really listening. She’s too busy trying to find a shop front where she can open a bakery without having to worry about getting mugged every time she steps outside.

Chloé comes with her, obviously, because they’re friends and Chloé has a business degree she puts to good use actually running Mari’s bakery and online boutique while Mari gets to bake and fuck around basically. Adrien, Luka and Kagami are not there, but that’s mostly because they travel too much to settle down and keeping an empty apartment in Gotham is just asking for trouble.

Kagami is a world-renowned fencer and Luka travels the world for his music company. Not touring, but soaking up cultures and ways of life so he can make soundtracks to movies and tv shows. Providing the background and life to a film is more his style than touring the world ala his father, Jagged Stone.

Adrien is having the time of his life being Kagami’s trophy husband. He has no pressing responsibilities he doesn’t take on for himself and he gets to fuck with the world’s elite with little to no consequences. He spends most of his days donating far too much money to charities and orphanages and then causing minor scandals that land him on the cover of magazines.

He has much the same kind of ‘dumbass with a heart of gold’ persona to the media as Bruce Wayne does, only without the playboy bits.

(There is a wall in the back of the bakery, where Chloé and Mari carefully cut out and frame every headline and ridiculous picture Adrien has. He is very much delighted when he learns about his ‘wall of fame’.)

Anyway, Marinette finds herself with a bakery not overly far from crime alley, much to Chloé’s chagrin.

(“What do you mean it ‘just felt right’?! I swear to kwami, DC, you’re going to get us robbed and sold into slavery.”)

They do not get sold into salvery.

In fact, despite their less than stellar choice of locale, they do pretty well for themselves. The only problems they have (according to Chloé) is the army of children Marinette accidentally attracted.

When asked, Marinette tells everyone that it was an accident. Meanwhile, Chloé, standing behind her, will shake her head and insist there was literally never any other option for them the moment that first kid came in looking to nab some cash and a few pastries.

Mari lives by the phrases, ‘kindness breeds more kindness’ and ‘do unto others’ and all that other nice person shit. Chloé just lets Mari pseudo-adopt her strays and makes sure that they don’t steal anything too important in the time it takes her to gain their loyalty.

The kwami stay staunchly out of any arguments involving the kids (and eventually the homeless all along their street and every working girl in a five-block radius). They do so with a special brand of amusement that never means good things for either of them. (After all, the last time the kwami looked that amused, they moved to Gotham.)

The first kid is named Serrure, as Marinette comes to learn over the next month after he returns again and again, getting closer and closer like a feral cat. Other kids come during that time, all of them too small and too thin and too guarded for Mari's tastes. She wants to wrap them all up and tuck them into bed but she can’t. She has to be patient, has to be gentle. These kids are just as likely to bite her hand as they are to accept help.

Serrure becomes an almost permanent fixture at the bakery after that first month. Mari’s not quite sure what she did to get through to him, but she did, she supposes. He can’t be much older than eleven and looks nine, but after getting settled, she and Chloé discover this little slip of a boy is just as mischievous as Trixx and has all the dramatics of their favorite black cat.

The kwami, when talking about him, only refer to Serrure as Loki, even after Marinette scolds them for it. She eventually gives up trying to correct them, it’s not like Serrure talks to them anyway(yet)((that she knows of)).

There’s an apartment above the bakery, which is where Chloé and Mari and all her strays that grow to trust her enough live. It’s three bedrooms, and at first, Mari just buys as many bunk beds as she can fit into the spare room and calls it a day. The kids feel safe in her home, which isn’t too surprising. Everyone thinks the bakery feels safe, feels like home or comfort or whatever else eases their minds.

And Marinette should hopes so. She certainly put enough time and effort and magic and energy into the wards around this place for that to happen. To protect her and the children and all her strays that no one else will help.

But, she eventually amasses too many kids to fit into the one room. Chloé throws a fit about having to share with Mari again—“I had enough of that in university thank you very much”—but she relinquishes easily enough.

Mari buys more bunk beds, and Serrure has taken to sneaking into her room to curl up in her bed anyway, and sometimes the smaller kids who have nightmares will come in and pile on as well.

(There are only a few that Chloé will allow to do the same with her. It is considered a high honor and breeds a playful kind of jealousy that Chloé finds amusing. Mari scolds her for pitting the kids against each other.)

That only lasts them another two months.

“This is getting ridiculous,” Chloé tells her one day before the kids wake up. Mari is at the stove, cooking and baking for a small army while Chloé balances the books. “There’s not enough room for us all, DC, and the only reason someone hasn’t come barrelling down on us about the abundance of children is by the grace of your absurd amount of luck.”

“Well I can’t just kick them out, Queenie! What do you want from me?”

“Either we need to buy more real estate in this city—which I’d rather not do—or you open up the grimoire and start building pocket dimensions. I know you can. I’ve read the chapter.”

Marinette looks at her. “That is such a bad idea.”

They do the idea.

And then Mari adds about a thousand more wards to the bakery, carved into the wood and counter and anything that’s a permanent fixture. Doorways become particularly ward heavy, what with them being the entrances and exits to the hidden realms and children’s’ rooms.

The apartment above the bakery isn’t quite infinite but it gets pretty damn close some days.

This also means, of course, that all the kids definitely know about magic now. Some of them—Serrure—have known about it for a while she knows, but it’s different now. The kwami followed her around most of the time and she doesn’t keep them trapped in the Miracle Box like Fu did, but now that the kids know, they don’t bother staying hidden.

The children, at least, love them and the kwami adore them with all the ferocity a god can give. After Chloé gets over her ‘ew children’ phase, she throws herself into their education (on top of actually running the businesses Mari keeps, mind you). She has the help of the kwami, who act as personal tutors to the children, and it’s not long before the kids start to joke about her being the Principal.

(Some tried to call her Warden, but that joke didn’t last long.)

Marinette has also been telling the kids bedtime stories ever since this started. Old stories of the Guardian and Chosens who fought back the darkness, she shares all she knows of the Orders history with these kids and it’s not until Wayzz points it out to her does she realize what she’s doing.

“Ladybugs are known for renewal. It is no surprise that you are rebuilding what was lost.”

Rebuilding the Order using children was certainly not her intention but, well. She supposes there’s no place safer for her kids than what is shaping up to be the new Miracle Temple. It’s the only haven where they can learn to harness their Gifts and powers, it’s the only place where they can be surrounded by others like them without being thrust into superhero-dom.

Context: about a month into this whole circus, Marinette had realized there was a significant—almost all of them really—amount of metas and Gifted in her little hoard of strays. Which is… odd. Especially with how few metas there are in Gotham.

She had asked the kwami about it, and they have that amused look again. “You are their guardian.”

“Excuse me?”

“You’re their guardian. True, you are the Guardian of us, of the ancient ways, but you are a guardian at your soul too. You protect what is yours, and they are yours whether you realise it or not. The children can sense that, so they flock to you.”

And, huh. She supposes that makes sense but that’s also really kind of strange and weird and she doesn't want to think about that anymore actually.

So things are… fine, Marinette supposes. The bakery is doing well, and she has about two dozen-plus helpers running around underfoot to help tend to the customers or run to the store or help in the back with the baking. And every kid of hers has new clothes, their street things thrown out for being too ragged and replaced with something fresh made by Marinette’s own hands.

She embroiders little fairy wings into the clothes normally, because that’s what her cloaked wards look like most times and the kids like it and its technically the logo for the bakery and there’s a million reasons she does it.

It is, perhaps, her first mistake.

(“It was certainly not your first,” Chloé will snark one dayin the future.)

Because now Marinette has an army of magical children learning to wield their powers and not fear them and they’re all wearing what can be considered her insignia and uh oh, it looks a lot like Mari is some sort of up and coming mob boss who uses kids and prostitutes and the homeless as runners. People on the street start calling her the Pixie, start referring to Chloé—her second in all things just as Chat had been her equal—as Wasp, as Yellowjacket, as the Unseelie.

(They cannot seem to pick a name for her, but Pixie is all but engraved in stone. Mari is not sure who coined it, and she doesn't think she wants to know.)

The first time the whole situation is brought to her attention, she punches the idiot who dared even imply such a thing so hard she knocks him out.

Because look. The kids are hers right? And she watches out for the people near her, makes sure the working girls are treated as well as they can be and offers the homeless extra food and a dry place to wait out the storm. She offers her hand and gives them all a place to rest, to eat, to exist without expectations or consequences.

She does that because she’s kind, because it hurts her to see people in need, to see them suffer, not because she’s hoping to gain something from it.

The fact that most of them repay her in gossip or information or bend her ear about the newest goings on in the corrupt elite or filthy underworld is strange, yes, but it’s nice to know what’s going on in the city, she supposes. And one time, Kathy, who works on the corner of Brookes and Gilmore, warned her of a drug raid that saved her an unnecessary trip to the police station so it’s not like it doesn't have it’s uses.

But mostly, Mari doesn't really think about all the information that’s unintentionally or otherwise passed onto her. She remembers it all, because it’s rude not to listen when people talk to her, but nothing comes of normally.

Not until Serrure—now twelve and well versed in the magic of illusions and glamors and knows almost as much about this city as her or the Bats—bursts into the bakery one day and grabs Mari away from the front counter right in the middle of a customer ordering. She should, perhaps, be a little angry at that but Tony, one of the older boys and just shy of sixteen, steps into her place almost immediately, so.

And then Serrure speaks and everything is pushed aside in favour of the next words to fall from his lips.

“Someone took Sophie,” he says and she nearly sees red.

After Serrure, Sophie has been here the longest. She is the youngest of them all, only seven, but oh so clever and kind and while she looks nothing like her, everyone calls her Mini-Mari. If Serrure is her beloved first son, Sophie is her treasured daughter.

She’s out the door in the next moment, storming her way to their base. She has Sophie and a handful of extra kids back by sunset, a little frightened, but no worse for wear. She doesn’t make a big deal out of it, besides making sure that the idiots who dared cross her never do so again, but word gets out.

Soon, her kids and teens and adults begin giving her more than just information, they begin giving her problems. Ones she’s meant to fix because she’s Pixie. She’s safety, she’s protection, she’s the one the people start to turn to for help.

And enter stage left, one Jason Todd who’s all snark and charm and smiles wrapped up in a nice leather bow and tall enough that Mari likely could climb him like a tree. If that was something she wanted, she guesses.

(She wants. She just won’t admit.)

He becomes a regular at the bakery and befriends most of her kids.

Mari’s wary when he first takes an interest in them. They’ve been hurt and a lot of them are still adjusting to being safe and it doesn't matter that this man is hot enough to burn, if he steps even a toe out of line with her kids she’ll make him wish he was never even born.

But, she stops worrying eventually. The kwami like him well enough, but seem to think something’s odd about him—but its Gotham, who isn’t strange?—and both Serrure and Sophie take to him like ducks to water and they’re both good judges of character.

There’s a certain intuition they both have that reminds Marinette just a bit too much about herself and pure magic. Not for the first time does she wonder if they got such strong magic from their parents or if it cropped up in them randomly, fostered by fortune and chance and the magic that’s so deeply seeped into the bones of her bakery it’ll be here long after she’s gone.

And, okay, so she was a little right to be wary because Jason was mostly there to investigate her. Far too many people respect her and are loyal to her and she has a veritable orphanage in her pocket and also Harley and Ivy like her and it just- it doesn’t look good right?

But Jason’s a good detective and it doesn't take him long at all to see that Mari is just as sweet and kind and loving as she appears to be. Not long after that, Red Hood declares Pixie and all of hers, under his protection. She, of course, is more than capable of taking care of her and hers, and the underworld knows this, has seen it, but he does it anyway.

The news, of course, gets back to Mari and she is… confused. Why would the Red Hood do something like that? She’s heard talk of him being sweet on kids, but to claim her? They’ve never even met.

Bonus points for Jason being there when she’s told about it. He kind of raises his eyebrow at her because, huh, that was fast, and then spends the next few minutes talking up the Red Hood to her much to her utter bafflement.

He actually keeps doing that too, talking up the Red Hood. Mari thinks he has a crush on the man for the longest time because of it. Until he reveals he is Red Hood, then she just wants to punch his stupidly handsome face for being such an idiot.

Shit happens from there and things go down and the two spend a couple of months dancing around each other and intentionally and unintentionally ruling the criminal underworld and at one point Marinette definitely punches Bruce and Batman in the face—separately, much to Jason’s unending joy—and she also definitely adopts Duke/Signal as well because that poor boy needs to know he’s not alone.

And it’s just them being domestic and badass and lowkey raising an army of children and falling in love while the kwami and the kids and Chloé are all in the background just yelling at them to get together already!

Which, they do. Eventually. After all the secrets come out and Jason knows about the magic and Order and meets Mari’s other friends, ie Kagami, Luka and Adrien who are all intimidating for wildly different reasons. And Mari finds out that Jason died and came back (which earns him the nickname firebird btw) and that he was a Robin once upon a time but is now Red Hood and oh my kwami it all makes sense now.

Jason confesses like three times via classic Victorian romance novel quotes because he’s a fucking literature nerd but it’s not until he basically spells it out for Mari does she really understand. it’s all very sweet and heartwarming and then the pair duck into one of the empty pocket dimensions they have lying around and aren’t seen for three days.

(No one really goes to look for them tbh)

Chloé definitely teases them about early honeymoons and things but besides the two being even more ridiculously lovey-dovey than usual, life goes back to normal. Or as normal as it gets for them. 

And they all live happily ever after the end.

[redpandaramblings]

Laundry Day. Sero x F!reader

Content warning- Mature humor, Mineta mention, sexual situations, heavy petting.

 “Come on!  It would be so much fun!”  Mina was bouncing on her heels, practically vibrating with excited energy as she tried to convince the group to go along with her scheme.

“So let me get this right.” Bakugo sighed.  “You want to do this fucking thrift store scronging thing for Christmas?”

“Yep!”  Mina said.  “Let’s be real, none of us have a lot of money this year, and this will be a way to have a lot of fun on a budget!  It’s simple.  Everyone finds the weirdest or most inappropriate thing they can buy for five bucks or less, and then we have a white elephant party on Christmas Eve!”

“White Elephant?” Kirishima asks, tilting his head.

Kaminari nods, jumping in.  “Yeah man!  Means people take turns picking gifts out of a pile.  Or they have the chance to steal a gift someone else already opened.  Basically, don’t go picking stuff thinking it will go to a specific person.”

“Is this going to be just us?  Or are we inviting everyone?  Because I live in curious fear of whatever Mineta would manage to dig up.”  You asked from where you were lounging.

Mina blanched while Denki cackled in delight.

“Oh god, we have to invite everyone now!  Imagine Midoria’s face!  Imagine Iida’s!”

“It’s settled!  Party at Bakubro’s!” Kiri cheered.

“Oi shitty hair! Don’t fucking invite everyone over to my place!”

“But you make the best curry!  Please?  For your bestest friends in the whole wide world?”

“Fuck no!”

“Pleeeeaaaase?”  Kiri pleaded.

“NO!”

Kirishima looked around the squad, communicating silently as everyone nodded.  As a collective force, you all turned your best puppy eyes at Bakugo.  He squirmed, firmly trying to look away from all of you.  You all started fake whimpering and whining.  You knew you had won when Katsuki’s lips briefly twitched into a smile.

“Alright!  Alright!  Now stop it, you fucking extras!”

“Three cheers for Bakubro!” Sero exclaimed.

The weeks flew by and before you knew it, the party was upon you.  Katsuki had grumbled and bitched the whole time, and yet now was gazing with pride at the absolute spread he had spent the last two days cooking.  Everyone had showed up, had gorged themselves, and were now in the process of opening presents.  There had been a couple weird mugs, a lamp made out of a deer leg, and Iida had had the misfortune of opening the gift Mineta had brought.  Everyone stared in horrified awe at the three foot long, hot pink dildo.

“Are those teeth marks on it?”

“Yep, teeth marks.”

“Mineta, where the hell did you find this thing?”

“I swear I got it at a thrift store!  The price tag is still on the base, look!”

“Yep.  That’s a price tag.”

“I’m not drunk enough for this.”

“I wanna bite it.”

“Y/N!  NO!”

There was a lot of laughter and teasing as the evening continued, gifts continuing to be claimed or stolen at a slow pace.  Just about everyone after Iida had tried to steal ownership of the horror dong as it had been nicknamed.  Denki had just stolen it from you, so you had to pick a new gift.  You pointed toward a box that was rather conspicuously wrapped entirely in tape.

“Okay, someone toss me whatever the hell Sero got.”

The black haired man gave a little fist pump as he snagged the box, walking over to sit next to you as he handed the box over.  He casually pressed against your side and slung an arm around your shoulders.  “Amiga, I’m honored!  You’re going to love it!”

“Yeah, I’m going to love it if I can ever get into it.”  You began the process of slowly unwrapping the absurd amount of tape.  “Seriously, anybody got a knife?”

A chorus of “no”s replied, no one actually bothering to look for one.

You gave a dramatic groan.  “You’re all awful and I hate each and every one of you.”

Hanta gasped and placed a hand over his heart.  “Even me, Querida?”

“Especially you, you office supply elbowed freak.”  You replied, sticking your tongue out at him even as you snuggled more comfortably into his side.

After a couple more minutes of dramatic whining and tape unwrapping, you finally got the box open, only to reveal the gaudiest t-shirt you had ever seen.  It was a nauseating shade of Pepto Bismol pink.  There was glitter.  And oh god, what the thing said.  You started cackling.  You held it up for everyone to see, discovering as you did so that this had to be the largest shirt you had seen in your life.

“Ooo, nice one Hanta, that’s really awful!”

“Someone steal this from me, please!”

“No way, Y/N!  It’s the perfect addition to your wardrobe!”

“Hermosa! I’m wounded you would get rid of my gift right after opening it.”

“Look at this thing!  Fatgum would swim in it!”

You made a show of grumbling, but you stowed the shirt back in its box and enjoyed the rest of your evening with your friends.  When you got home quite late that evening, you shoved the box into the back of your closet and didn’t think about it again until almost a year later.

~~~

Today had been the day from hell.  You muttered curses to yourself as you stomped down the hallway to your apartment.  Work had been harder than usual, the kind of day that made you grateful to make the long commute back home.  So of course today would be the day that the subway would be taken over by a villain who had a sludge quirk.  Asshole had flooded the cars with the thick, foul smelling, viscous ooze that reminded you of things unmentionable.  You and the other passengers had had to scramble to make sure no one ended up in over their head.  Lucky everyone had been saved.  Unluckily you and many others, you had spent the better part of two hours standing shoulder deep in the muck.  It was in your hair.  It had soaked your clothes.  It was in your underwear.  And the icing on the cake was of course it was your friends and neighbors who had rescued you.  Of course your crush had seen you when you looked like you had taken up competitive septic tank diving.  

It took you three tries before your key actually got in the lock.  You shuffled into your apartment and straight for the bathroom.  Grimacing as you peeled your clothing off, you unceremoniously chucked everything into the hamper before stepping into the shower and turning the water as hot as it would go.  You stayed in the shower for over an hour scrubbing and rescrubbing every inch of you.  With great reluctance, you eventually stepped out of the shower, reaching for a towel.  You lazily dried yourself off as you walked into the bedroom, intent on putting on pajamas and pretending you didn’t exist for the next several hours.  

You opened your underwear drawer only to be filled with a deep sense of dread.  Empty.  Your pajama drawer? One pair of extreme booty shorts that say “creepy” on the butt.  Your t-shirt drawer?  Empty.  Your closet?  Empty.  Frustrated tears threatened to slip down your cheeks as you realized that the shorts were the only clean item of clothing in your apartment.  You had been meaning to do laundry for a while, but you hadn’t realized that it had gotten this bad.  As much as you hated to, you were going to have to do your laundry tonight.  You put the shorts in and  looked through your closet again, desperate enough to find a sheet to try and fashion into a toga when you spotted a rather bedraggled tape covered box.  You hadn’t thought about your ridiculous white elephant gift in several months, but now?  Well, it technically was a shirt.  It certainly would cover you better than an improvised sheet toga.  Before you could think twice about it, you opened the box, grabbed the shirt, and slipped it on.

The shirt swam on you, going past your butt.  The color was bad, and you winced at the image on the front.  But, you were now decent enough to venture down to the building’s shared laundry room.  So, after grabbing your hamper, detergent, and quarter jar; you did just that.

You hummed the Mission Impossible theme to yourself as you descended the stairwell to the ground floor.  Most of your friends lived on this level, but chances were they were fast asleep at this time of night.  You were glad of that as you hurried along.  You really didn’t want to run into anyone wearing your current getup.  It took several minutes to sort your laundry into a few machines and get everything started.  You were leaning against the last machine in the line, debating going back to your place or just staying here when you heard something that made you freeze.  Upbeat whistling that was growing closer each second.  You knew that whistle You did not want to see the owner of that whistle right now.  You had already been embarrassed in front of crush today, you really didn’t need him showing up for round two.  You were debating how quickly you could scramble into a dryer to hide when Sero Hanta entered the room.  

He briefly glanced your way.  “Hey Y/N!  I figured I might see you here.  I’ll admit I’ve seen some shit, and that was gross even by my standards.  I wanted to ask how you were doing.  Make sure you weren’t injured or any…”. He trailed off when he finally registered what exactly you were wearing.  His grin turned positively feral as he set his own laundry bag to the side.

“My, my, my.”  Sero gave a rumbling chuckle.  “Whatever do we have here?”  Sero’s eyes could sweep up and down your body.  His signature grin grew wider as his gaze lingered on your t-shirt clad chest.  

You crossed your arms, attempting to hide the gigantic image of a lime green, glittery, prancing unicorn proclaiming “I’m horny!”  What were the odds that someone else would be washing their clothes at two in the morning?  Apparently changes were pretty damn high, you thought as you leveled a half hearted glare at your friend and neighbor.  

“It’s laundry day, Hanta, don’t read into it.”

“But Hermosa!  How can I not?  The first time I see mi corazón wearing the gift I so painstakingly chose for her?”  He waggled his eyebrows as his trademark teasing grin spread over his face.

You blushed, turning your head to the side and refusing to look at him.

“You’re full of crap, Cellophane.  It’s been a really shitty day, and this was literally my only thing to wear.”

Sero nodded and hummed, turning to put his own laundry in the machines.  “Si, si.  It was a rather difficult time, it looked like.  And you okay though?  Not injured?  I didn’t get a chance to catch up with you after the fight was over.”

You groaned, tilting your head back and covering your face with your hands. “I’m afraid I got a nasty case of extreme embarrassment and took a heavy blow to my pride.  Of course you fuckers had to be the heros on duty for that whole debacle.”

Hanta looks at you seriously as shoves disorganized armfuls of laundry into the nearest machine.  “I’d rather it be me saving you than anybody else, Querida.”

You let your hands fall to your side with a disgruntled sigh.  “Why?  So you can witness all the embarrassing situations you can blackmail me with?”

“Well now that you mention it, yes.”  Sero dumped an obscene amount of soap into the washer before turning it on.  “However,” he purred in a sinful voice that startled you.  He stalked toward you like a hungry jaguar.  He stalked toward you like a hungry jaguar.  Squeaking, you inched away from him until the back of your legs were pressed firmly against the cold metal of the washing machine. Hanta leaned over your retreating frame, placing an arm on either side of you, caging you in.  “Querida mia, I want to always be able to make sure you are safe.”

You placed your hands on his chest, halfheartedly trying to shove him away.

“That’s very touching.  Now get out of my personal space.”

 “But Querida,”  Sero murmured, his voice going low and sensual, moving closer until your hips pressed against each other.  “There’s nowhere I’d rather be than your personal space.  Si supieras las cosas que quiero hacerte...”

With him so close, there was nothing you could do to disguise the shiver that ran through you at his words.  

“Oh?  What’s this?”  Sero said.  His large hands traveled to your hips, his long fingers finding their way under the hem of your shirt to tantalizingly stroke your skin.  He leaned forward, voice turning to a growl with his mouth next to your ear.  “Hermosa likes me speaking Español, hmm?”

You bite your lip before giving in and nodding.

“Well, in that case…  Taco supreme!”

The fingers that had been stroking your skin suddenly became deadly, horrible tickle weapons; digging into your sides and moving rapidly.  You shrieked with surprised laughter, thrashing from side to side as you tried to escape.  However, Hanta’s large frame and firm hips kept you pinned against the washing machine as his traitorous fingers continued their assault.  He continues to tease in between his own laughter.  “Nachos grande!  Cinnamon Twists!  Quiero Taco Bell!”

Tears are streaming down your cheeks as you wheeze and slap at his chest.  “Stop!  Stop!  You horrible man!”  He gets in a few more tickles before he does stop, wrapping his arms around you, pulling into a tight hug as you both take a few moments to pant and calm your laughter.  He nuzzles your neck before asking softly, “Feel better?”

You nod, just enjoying his warm body wrapped around you.

“Y/N?”

“Yeah?”  Your voice just as soft as his, one of your hands finds its way up to stroke his hair.

“I’d really like to kiss you right now.”

“Please.”  You whisper softly, tugging at his hair just enough to encourage him to move his head back.  Your lips find each other, cautious and gentle at first.  Then, Hanta nips at your lower lip, and you let your mouth fall open with a whimper.  The kiss is hunger and passion, and heat.  Tongues wrestling, teeth lightly biting and teasing each other as hands roam and grope.  Sero’s hands find the back of your thighs and soon he’s lifting you, setting you down on the edge of the washing machine.  He presses himself between your spread legs, bucking against you, and you can feel his hard length teasing you through your clothes.

“Wanted this so long.  You have no idea how long.  Y entonces hoy estaba tan preocupado por ti.  Cuando vi que estabas en peligro, quise matar a ese villano y encerrarte donde nunca más estarías en peligro.”

“Me too.  Wanted this so long, but didn’t think you felt the same.  Now get back here and kiss me like you mean it!”

He happily complied, his lips fitting over yours as if they had been made to be placed together.  The kisses and touches didn’t stay innocent long, his hands finding your breasts through your shirt, teasing and pulling at your nipples.  One of your hands traveled down to stroke the obvious bulge that was rutting against you.  Between his thrusting and the vibrations of the machine you were sitting on, your shorts were becoming visibly soaked.  His fingers found their way up a leg hole and he moaned sinfully when he found there weren't any undergarments keeping his touch from your soaking folds.  It was your turn to smirk, pulling away from his kisses to whisper in his ear.

“I told you, Darling.  Laundry day.”

“Amore, you’re going to be the death of me.”  He groans, shoving his face into your cleavage as he slips a finger into you.

You laugh breathlessly.  “You better not die on me, Hanta.  What I have in mind will be much less fun if you’re dead.”

“HOLY FUCK!”  Shouted a very recognizable voice from the doorway.  Your groan was not from pleasure as you rested your head on Sero’s shoulder.

“Piss off, Denki.”

“Hanta’s finally getting some honey!  Score man!”

“What’s going on?” Mina’s sleep heavy voice drifted in from the hallway.

“Y/n and Sero are going to Pound Town in the Laundry Room!”

“Denki, en el nombre de Dios, I will kill you if you don’t back out of that doorway and let me finish what I started.”

Bakugo’s voice rang down the hall “No fucking in the goddamn Laundryroom!”

Kiri’s voice soon followed “Take it easy, Tsuki!  They can clean up when they’re done!  Get some guys!  You need condoms?”

Sero sighed deeply, pulling his hand out of your pants as your shoulders shook from silent laughter.  “I think, Hermosa, we can agree no fucking in front of the friend group?”

You nodded, laughing as you jumped down from your washing machine perch. “Not until the third date at least.”

Sero moaned softly, not expecting the way that statement had made his cock twitch.  Acting quickly, he scooped you up, and threw you over his shoulder like a sack of potatoes.  “My room.  Now.”

“Ooo, Caveman Hanta.  Sexy.”

Denki jumped to the side to let Sero pass, calling after you “Don’t do anything I wouldn’t!”

You called back “Well, I’m going to do Hanta, so what does that say about you?”

Sero’s hand came down on your bottom with a firm smack as he continued down the hallway and around the corner, taking you two toward his apartment and out of sight.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Spanish guide- 

Amiga- Friend

Querida- Darling

Hermosa- Beautiful

Querida mia- My darling.

 Si supieras las cosas que quiero hacerte- If you knew the things that I want to do to you

Y entonces hoy estaba tan preocupado por ti.  Cuando vi que estabas en peligro, quise matar a ese villano y encerrarte donde nunca más estarías en peligro.-  And then today I was so worried about you. When I saw that you were in danger, I wanted to kill that villain and lock you up where you would never be in danger again.

Hey guys!  Pan here, hope you enjoyed it.  It’s been quite a while since I’ve put any of my fanfic out there, so please be gentle with me.  I just used Google translate for the Spanish, so I’m sure some of it is very wrong.  If you have corrections, please feel free to send them my way!  Also, if you see any triggers that need tagging please let me know.  I also accept constructive criticism, and appreciate having spelling and grammar mistakes pointed out.  Also want to take the chance to answer this question ahead of time-

“The fuck is up with the dildo?!?!”

The Dildo of Doom is based on real events.  That actually happened.  One of my former sorority sisters found the dong of death at a thrift store.  It did indeed have teeth marks on it.  Human teeth marks, I should clarify.  Truth is stranger than fiction.

I have to thank @reinawritesbnha for helping me edit some clunky sections.  If you aren’t already familiar with her work, please check her out!

Taglist- @reinawritesbnha @nkjktk

[chubbymoongoddess]

So I was thinking of something dark that slowly starts to get better?

TW for Rape, ABO, mpreg

Teenage (17yrs) omega J/imin going out to a party with some of his friends one night on a weekend (He'd never miss school or go on a school night. He's top of his class.) He aims to stick with his group and only have a few drinks but things don't go as planned and a very handsome alpha starts to speak to him. He has no intentions to do anything with this alpha, but he does talk to him to be nice plus.. he's enamored by the way he smells. Through the course of the night, J/imin ends up drinking just a little more than he was supposed to and he ends up drunk. He dances with the alpha and ends up having the time of his life with him but when the omega starts to feel sick and sleepy, he can't seem to find his friends at all. The alpha he had met offers to take him home and usually he'd reject this but his head is spinning, he has a fever, he can't see straight and he feels like he's going to throw up, so he agrees. Little does he know he's started his heat but he's so drunk that he just thinks he's had too much to drink. The alpha leads J/imin out to his car and at first it seems like it's going well. He's listening to all of J/imin's directions and even agrees to drop him off a few blocks away so he doesn't learn where the omega lives. It changes though when the alpha locks all of the car doors and pulls into a dark alleyway. Major alarms go off in J/imin's brain and he starts trying to get out but the alpha pulls him back. He's screaming and crying at first but the alpha tells him to shut up or he'll rip his tongue out. During the rest of the time J/imin is silently sobbing until the alpha is finished with him, telling him that if he speaks a word of this he'll find him and kill him before throwing him out in the alley and speeding away. This terrifies J/imin and he ends up limping home and sneaking up to his room. His parents are asleep anyway, it's late. He strips himself of his clothes and scrubs himself raw in the shower before crawling into bed and trying to get some sleep.

The next few weeks J/imin acts as if the night at the club didn't happen. The alpha's words have him terrified and he doesn't want to die. His friends had asked what happened to him that night as they had thought he left early without saying anything and he had told them that he did because he was sick. They bought it. During the middle of his fifth class, the omega has to excuse himself to rush to the bathroom to throw up. His best friend T/aehyung follows him out to make sure he's okay, rubbing over his back the entire time. with a worried expression on his face. Once he's finished, J/imin curls up into a ball and cries. He knows what's going on. He knows that his body had been acting weird lately and this just confirmed it. He had a pup coming. he had his rapist's pup coming. His sobs turned into a full blown panic attack and T/aehyung had to back up to give him some space, talking him through it all the while. Once J/imin was calm enough to speak, he told T/aehyung everything but begged him to keep it a secret which, his best friend pinky promised to do. It seemed childish, but J/imin knew he meant it.

The next issue was telling his parents. It took the omega a whole week of building himself up just to gather his parents in the living room for a "talk." He wanted to cry but he put on his brave face and told them. His mother immediately started to cry and his father looked like he was going to blow a gasket before spewing a slur of hateful speech toward his son, calling him a "slut", no good, and useless among other things before telling him to pack his shit and get out. His mother tried to intervene but J/imin's father's words were final. So, with his heart shattered, the omega packed everything he possibly could carry in the few bags he had in his room, mainly clothes and a few special items he cared for, like a stuffed dog his mother had given him on his 3rd birthday. At the door, his mother gave him the tightest hug she could but it was short lived as his father pried them apart. J/imin gave one last look to his parents before leaving the house, hearing the click of the lock once the door was slammed behind him.

Having nowhere else to go, he headed for T/aehyung's. He should have called first, sure, but his cell phone was buried in one of his bags so he showed up on his best friend's porch, eyes dry until T/aehyung opened the door and frowned. That's when J/imin broke down and fell to his knees. The other omega helped his best friend inside, getting him situated on the couch and scenting over him to try to calm him down. It worked for the most part so he got J/imin some water before asking his parents if he could stay there for a while. Thankfully, T/aehyung's parents loved J/imin and agreed, not caring that he was pregnant. They set him up in T/aehyung's room, even giving him his own makeshift bed for the time being until they could get him a proper one. That night both he and T/aehyung sat up, talking about the pup. J/imin was.. conflicted to say the least. On one had, he wanted to get rid of it. Wanted nothing to do with it and maybe then... maybe then his parents would let him come home. Maybe his father would apologize..but on the other hand, he wanted to keep the pup. It gave him a new sense of purpose. The two stayed up long into the early hours of dawn before J/imin finally decided that he was going to live for this pup. He was going to do everything he could to give it the best life possible.

Over the next 9 months, J/imin continued to go to school and excel in every one of his classes. It was only around the time that his pup came when he had to start missing. He had a healthy little boy and had named him Jasper and he absolutely adored him with all his heart. How could something so precious come from something so.. evil? Unfortunately, due to J/imin having to care for his pup, he had to start missing school more and more to the point where he had dropped out. He didn't want to.. God, he didn't want to but his pup mattered more to him at the moment. Since he was no longer going to school, he got a job working overnights to help T/aehyung's parents out while he stayed there. Thankfully T/aehyung's mother had agreed to watch Jasper while J/imin worked. The two lived there until after graduation. J/imin had managed to save up enough money for a small apartment downtown while T/aehyung had gone off to college, making J/imin to promise to call him every night on his breaks.

Now, the only work J/imin could find without much of a hassle was at a strip joint. They would only let him wait tables until he turned 18 and now that he finally was, he was able to start dancing. Sadly though, he had to bring Jasper with him as he couldn't keep asking T/aehyung's mother to keep watching him. The club didn't give a shit and the other dancers adored him. Over the years, J/imin bonded with everyone of his coworkers. They would all keep an eye out for each other, especially J/imin and his pup. They were special to the other dancers and they weren't afraid to kill anyone who dared to hurt them. Every single bit of money that J/imin made went to his bills and his son. The omega never gave personal dances and never went home with anyone, no matter how much they offered him. He just.. couldn't. He didn't like to be touched by strangers. He'd go into full panic mode if anyone so much as grabbed his wrist. Some nights were hard and J/imin barely made enough to pay his rent, some nights only Jasper would get to eat and when he saw that his father had nothing, he'd split his food and offer it to J/imin who would try his best not to tear up, thank his son and eat what was offered.

Now, J/imin's landlord was a real scumbag and would often pick on the omega for every little thing he could and would always try to flirt with him. J/imin ignored his advances of course which pissed his landlord off. It got to the point where he had told J/imin that he was upping his rent and if he couldn't pay it by that Monday then they'd be out on the street. J/imin argued with him for a while to which his landlord gave him an ultimatum. Sleep with him or pay the rent. There was absolutely no way J/imin would sleep with him, so he opted for paying the absurd amount of rent. He would try and work more often, would try to do more dances but it wasn't enough as he had to pay other bills and feed his son. He almost had a breakdown before his next set but managed to compose himself so Jasper wouldn't see. While dancing, the omega caught the eyes of a handsome man. Tall with silver hair and wearing glasses. The stranger motioned to him that he wanted to talk afterward which usually J/imin wouldn't agree to and he'd ignore the person, but he was desperate and maybe this man would pay him enough to keep his apartment,

Once he was finished dancing, he motioned for the man to meet him by the back door. When he walked out of the dressing room, he had to catch his breath. This was an alpha and he was at least a foot taller than J/imin. He wanted so badly to run. Run back into the safety of the dressing room. But he had to do this. Not for him, but for his son. He was right. The alpha wanted to take him home for the night and he was going to pay way more than he needed for rent. As much as J/imin wanted to throw up, he accepted, telling the alpha (who's name he learned was N/amjoon) to wait outside in the parking lot for him to which N/amjoon agreed. Back in the dressing room, the omega got his regular clothes back on and tidied up his station, getting everything he needed into his bag that he brought to and from work. He kneeled down to Jasper, cupping his little chubby cheeks in his hands. "Baby, Daddy is going to be gone for tonight so you're going to stay at uncle H/oseok's tonight, alright?" The pup squealed in excitement! He loved his uncle H/oseok very very much and J/imin was thankful to have made a new friend in his fellow dancer. With a few kisses on the cheeks and a tight hug, J/imin said goodbye for the night to his son and everyone else before heading out to meet the alpha in the parking lot.

He was led to the car, which was nice unsurprisingly and got in. He took in deep breaths all the way to N/amjoon's home, a really nice house near the beach, until he was led inside. The moment N/amjoon put his hands on J/imin's waist, the omega screamed and flinched away. It had the alpha taken aback and J/imin apologizing profusely while he teared up. N/amjoon shook his head, keeping his distance all while trying to comfort the crying omega. It took a while but once J/imin realized that N/amjoon wasn't a threat to him, he managed to calm himself. The alpha asked if he wanted to talk about anything and J/imin just... spilled his guts. To a perfect stranger who had brought him home to fuck him. He told him about what happened when he was 17. He told him about Jasper and T/aehyung and his parents and what happened with his own parents. He even told him about the landlord and why he agreed to go home with N/amjoon. By the time he was finished, he was shaking and crying again. N/amjoon managed to coax him into the living room, wrapping a blanket around his shoulders. "Well, I'll tell you what. You're gorgeous but after this.. I don't want you to have to have sex with me if you're not comfortable. How about we talk. Get to know each other and I'll still pay you. Is that alright?" At first J/imin denied it, not wanting to take the alpha's money if he wasn't getting what he expected. But after a few more attempts from N/amjoon, J/imin finally relented. The two stayed up all night talking. About anything and everything they could think of. It turned out that J/imin had a lot in common with this alpha. He even found himself cheering up and having a good time with him. When it was time for him to leave, N/amjoon handed him a wad of cash, smiling at him. "as promised." Jimin teared up again.

He collected Jasper from H/oseok's, thanking the other omega profusely before heading home to pay his landlord, who accepted the money but told J/imin that it still wasn't nearly enough. The omega bared his fangs, balling his fists up. "That's more than the amount you told me!!" The landlord grins, pointing to himself and then downward. J/imin tenses and shakes his head. "no. No I will not. I refuse." "Then you need to be out in the next three days." No amount of arguing would help. He tried. For the first time in his life, J/imin cried in front of his son, who cried with him, not knowing what was upsetting his father so much. J/imin hugged the pup, explaining that they're going to have to move and when Jasper asks where.. J/imin tells the truth. "I don't know." He can't ask H/oseok. He has a family of his own and he doesn't want to impose. He can't ask anyone else he dances with either. They're friends and they protect each other but he doesn't know their personal lives as much as he knows H/oseok's. It's then that he remembers that N/amjoon had given him his phone number. He didn't want to. He really didn't. He had only met this guy a day ago! But he really had no other choice. A shelter wouldn't take them in. He was a single parent and they didn't like people like him. With a deep breath, he dialed the alpha's number, hands shaking as he waited for him to pick up. It took only two rings for N/amjoon to answer with a cheery "hello!" but it was quickly drowned out with J/imin speaking way too fast through his tears. "I..I hate to ask but can my son and I stay with you? Just until we can find somewhere else to go please. I.. I have no other options. He.. the landlord wanted me to.. do give him favors even after I gave him the money. P..Please N/amjoon..Please." The line was quiet for a moment and the omega had figured that the alpha was going to say no. Instead, his soft voice came through the receiver. "stay there. I'm coming to help you pack and pick you two up..and I have to have a chat with your landlord."

It took him about half an hour to arrive and at first Jasper is weary but after a few moments of getting to know the alpha, the pup is all over him. Asking him questions and showing him the little bit of toys he has. N/amjoon is instantly in love, helping the little family of two pack up all of their belongings and taking them to his car where he tells them to wait. He goes to talk to the landlord, giving the man some very threatening words, even lifting him off of the floor by his shirt. He gets their money back all except the amount for the last rent J/imin had to pay before meeting with the omega and his son and taking them back to his place. He had set a room up for J/imin and had another room set up for Jasper. "We'll fill these with new things over the time you're here but for now.. these two rooms are yours. You don't have to pay me rent. I don't need it. All I ask is that you treat me like a friend, alright? I know we just met but I promise you, I'm not a bad guy." J/imin wanted to hug the alpha but couldn't.. so he managed a teary eyed thank you. Jasper on the other hand, squealed and hugged N/amjoon's legs as tightly as he could. "thank you mister J/oonie! Thank you!"

J/imin continued to work at the club as the months passed. At first he started to save up for an apartment but as time went by, his and N/amjoon's friendship had slowly started to turn into something else. There was still no touching.. sexually anyway. J/imin had gotten comfortable with hugs and even cuddling. It took him a while but N/amjoon never ever pushed him to do something he didn't want to. Eventually the two started dating. Months upon months went by and J/imin had fallen head over heels for this alpha. He never thought he'd be loved for the way he was but N/amjoon never pushed. They didn't need to have sex right now it's okay. He was ready when J/imin was finally ready, whenever that may be. The omega had quit his job a month later and as sad as he was to say goodbye to everyone, he was happy he didn't have to deal with the creeps anymore. He got to stay home with his son, get a full night's sleep for the first time in six years. Jasper was transferred to a better school as well.

All the comfort had eventually caught up to J/imin and over the next two years, he had gained weight. A lot of it. He had ballooned up to 410 pounds and now sported a large double belly, a wide, dimpled ass with thighs to match and his hips brushed against the doorframes in the house, a large double chin and round face complete with overly puffy cheeks, his arms were flabby and he had a little roll of fat over his elbows and his moobs were fat and heavy, jiggling whenever he walked. He still hadn't gotten comfortable enough for sex..and with all the added weight didn't think he'd ever be comfortable. He felt.. absolutely and utterly ugly. Sure, the weight gain was from him being comfortable and happy but what if N/amjoon left him now? What if he threw him and Jasper out on the streets because he wasn't attracted to the omega anymore? A night came where J/imin asked N/amjoon this and the alpha looked almost offended. "Minnie, I love you for who you are, not what you look like and besides, all of this happened because you're comfortable for the first time in your life since you were 17, right?" J/imin nods, looking down to which N/amjoon cups his chubby cheeks, making him look the alpha in the eyes. "Baby, I'm always going to want you and only you. I promise. I like how soft and squishy you've grown. Your hugs have gotten even comfier and it's always nice to have you cuddling against me. I'll admit, sometimes it turns me on, but I'll never act on that until you're ready, okay? I promise."

J/imin teared up, biting his lip. For the first time since he was 17, he opened his mouth to ask N/amjoon for sex. "I..I'm ready. It's been.. It's been 8 years now.. and I know it's going to stick with me forever.. but you've made it easier for me to forget. You've made it easier for me to love.. and touch and be touched again. I.. I love you Joonie.. please.. please I'm ready." N/amjoon confirmed with the omega that he was sure three more times before they began and another three times during. Each time J/imin confirmed that he was okay, that he was enjoying everything. For the first time in 8 years, J/imin was happy and enjoying himself. He felt loved. He felt comfort and N/amjoon was so gentle, always asking if he was okay or if what he was doing was too much. Afterward, when they were snuggling in bed, J/imin knew that he'd never have to be afraid again.

[realm-sweet-realm]

A Worthwhile Investment, chapter 3

Please enjoy this Grant x Shawn story. Yes, I split it into two short chapters. Apparently I can’t be succinct with these two... hopefully I made the right choice!

Next is Thomas x Allison!

Time went by. The studio worsened in most respects. Though its installation was nothing out of the ordinary, it felt as though the ink machine was creeping through the halls, its long pipes growing into new areas. Wherever it went, it left the scent of sickly rubber ink and stained through the walls, like a creeping, musty black mold. That alone would have brought down morale, but it was nothing compared to the financial crisis. Every department was operating on a slashed budget, and yet Joey refused to lower his demands on any of them. Whenever someone quit out of anger, there was relief- it meant that those who remained would be less likely to be laid off. The studio was a rotting body, ravaged by the parasite of the ink machine and struggling to move its massive weight now that so many of its workers were gone.

Grant was not handling it well. His department understood that it the studio’s financial problems weren’t his fault, but he didn’t blame anyone else for hating the man who had decided how much to slash their budget, or who told them, while they were already underpaid, that their paycheck would be late because there simply was no money to pay them. It was his job to prevent this from happening. But with Joey spending more and more on Bendyland and the ink machine, and refusing to downsize anything when it was really overdue to do so, it was proving impossible. It was soul-crushing.

Things weren’t easy on Shawn, either. Fewer staff for the same amount of plushes meant having to work longer and faster, and making plushes out of cheaper materials meant that there was less room for error before the cheap, delicate things they’d been reduced to selling simply fell apart. Shawn was getting screamed at more than usual nowadays.

At least they had each other. During better times, their relationship had been on and off. There were periods when one of them just couldn’t handle the other’s issues or couldn’t handle being in a relationship at the moment, and they’d break up, only to get back together after a while. Shawn had even dated other people during their temporary breaks. Neither of them were especially serious about their relationship, so it worked for them. Now, they were together for the foreseeable future. There was little time or energy for romance anymore, but they stole the moments they could and hoped that things would eventually improve. Shawn had even moved into Grant’s house at the time. This was good for both of them- living with someone else made things easier domestically during this busy time, and it was good to come home from a difficult day at work and meet up with someone who loved you and brightened your mood.

“Ah think we should quit,” Shawn said one day over dinner. “None-a this is healthy. I’m sick of it, you certainly ain’t yourself, and anyhow, yer always saying the company won’t last another year.” Shawn saw Grant hesitate. “Well, Ah’m quitting. Join me or don’t, Ah don’t care.”

“I have a feeling that things will improve once Bendyland opens. It’s supposed to open in three months,” well, it was supposed to open over a year ago, but hopefully they could reach the new deadline, “so, let’s see where the studio is in five months. If we’re not having a much better time at work by then, let’s do it. Or you can quit sooner- please, don’t let me hold you back. But that’s when I’m doing it.”

“Five months sounds great! I’ll mark it on the calendar. To a chance at a better life!”

Grant forced a smile. “To a chance at a better life.” He honestly wished Shawn would just quit so that he didn’t feel like he was holding him back.

There were a few reasons that Grant didn’t want to quit. It wasn’t about money (he had some saved up), or fear that he couldn’t get another job (he had the experience to land another). Mostly, it was about pride. Grant might be the financial manager of a failing massive company, but still, he was the finances manager of a massive company- with a department working under him and his own secretary. This could be the highest-profile job he would ever have. He also worried that the next job would be just as miserable. He recognized, though, that he couldn’t stay in an awful work environment for those reasons, let alone keep Shawn in one. And no matter what, the studio would be dead in a few years, so he’d have to leave it eventually. And heck- maybe Shawn was right. Maybe it would be better.

---

It was while Grant was walking down one of the Joey Drew Studios hallways that it happened, though it had seemed rather insignificant at the time. A burly, blond GENT worker deliberately loosened a bolt on one of the ink pipes as he passed, spraying a cloud of ink fumes into his face.

“That’s for getting my buddy laid off,” the man grumbled as Grant coughed on the fumes.

“Hey!” another GENT worker, shouted, “pull another stunt like that, and you’ll be the one leaving for good!” The GENT worker ran over to Grant. “You alright, sir? I can pay for the dry cleaning if you want.”

“Don’t bother,” Grant snapped, “just teach your men some respect.”

Grant looked down at his thoroughly stained suit and dress shirt and weighed whether to arrive at his next meeting late or drenched. He decided on the former and turned for the exit. As he left, he heard one of the GENT men telling the other, “that’s how you get our budget cut even more!” It was rather strange to be such a frightening creature nowadays.

By evening, Grant was feeling sick- as though he had a flu coming on. He spent a few days laying around before returning to work, feeling just as badly. He couldn’t afford more time off if he didn’t want to end up entirely buried by work. Shawn was mildly concerned when it was a few weeks in and the illness didn’t seem to be going away- and that Grant was intent on working through it- but all he could do was support Grant through it and give him the space he needed. Even in the beginning, it was extremely frustrating that his boyfriend was suffering and unable to do much of anything outside of work, but to an extent it was nothing Shawn wasn’t used to- Grant had had bouts of depression nearly as bad as this. As time went on, Shawn noticed some more disturbing changes.

It was about two weeks in that the voice emerged and the hallucinations began. Grant had been in his office when he’d heard a pained scream- seemingly from right outside of it. He rushed out, expecting to see an injured person or an emergency of some sort. Instead, he found only his secretary, perfectly calm and looking at him as though he was an alien. “Do you know where that came from?” Grant asked.

“Where what came from?” Oh, that judgmental stare.

“The scream? You heard the scream, right?”

“No.”

Grant cringed and closed the door to his office.

The headaches, the brain fog, the fatigue, and now the hallucinations, a voice said. It was a voice that sounded as real as the scream had, but it wasn’t one he’d heard before. Do you want to know what’s causing it? There was a pause, as though Grant would answer and let his secretary think even worse of him. You’re losing your mind. You know what they do with crazy people, right? An image of an electric chair flashed through Grant’s mind, followed by an image of locked insane asylum doors and tools used for a lobotomy. Just carry on. Try to act normal, and don’t let anyone know about this. I’ll be here when you need me. Grant sat back down at his desk, taking a look around the room as though he could find where the voice was coming from. Finding nothing, he returned to his paperwork.

A few weeks later, Grant decided to coax some answers from the voice. It was absurd- if it was right, and it probably was, the voice came from him, and couldn’t know anything he didn’t. But he had few options. His symptoms were becoming glaringly obvious. Shawn had noticed that he was spacing out during conversations, and his department was noticing that he couldn’t keep track of time and was making mathematical errors he never would have before. Shawn had even seen him react to hallucinations a couple times, and it frightened him. Grant knew he needed to figure this out before it hurt his professional life, or hurt his relationship any further.

It was a cold winter’s night. Grant returned home after work- thankfully Shawn wasn’t home yet- and went to his room to interrogate.

“Alright,” he said, facing the wall. “Tell me what I have. If there’s a way to fix it, I’m going to.”

Shawn had been unable to sleep that night, so he heard Grant’s voice. It didn’t bother him, though, until Grant started yelling. Shawn got up and went to investigate. The house was totally dark except for the light coming from Grant’s room. Shawn creaked open the door. Grant was facing a wall, shifting his weight as though he might spring on his invisible adversary if it proved necessary.

[itsmoonphobic]

👑Royal Buisness👑 (SBI+Tommy AU)

Hello!My name is Moonbow and I am a huge sbi+more fan! And so I decided to do my bois some justice and create a au based off of dnd and skyrim!They all reside in the land of "Bladestrom" a legendary kingdom build out of mysterious ruins and on the ground where dragons once rested.I will let you in on some headcanons and insights about each character!I hope you guys enjoy it🥺👑💓

Dave(Techno) Blade:

The 12th heir of the throne King Technoblade,or simply King Blade.A strong and fearless warrior known for his determination,power and strength.

He has a serious and egoistic facade.Though in reality the king is anything but egoistic and serious.Quiet the opposite actually:He tends to be very polite and respectful.Sure his ego is the size of a full grown dragon but he is a big hearted man.

Techno mostly stays in his castle walls and prefers to read or write in peace.The only time he will actually step foot in the outside world was during night,when his people need him or his favorite hobby ;)

He has a pretty unbalanced and unhealthy sleeping schedule which he constantly gets reminded of.

The only person Techno actually lets into his private life is his best friend Phil.Phil is Techno's personal knight and right hand man.Techno trusts Phil with his eyes closed,his loyalty is very appreciated.

A huge downside for Techno's reputation is that he is really shy and socially awkward.The poor guy can't find the right words or say anything normal without feeling like he said something fully absurd.

Apart from reading and fighting,Techno loves to farm potatoes in his free time.He loves the fresh taste once they are harvested and prepared properly!!His potatoes are known to be from the best quality in the whole land!Which earns Techno some extra money.

Techno won't admit it infront of Phil or anyone else but he has a soft spot for children,especially orphans. He knows the feeling of growing up without parents and he feels connected to them.That's why Techno stops by the local orphanage to donate some money he earned from his potato farming.

Techno loves to train and upgrade his swordsmanship abilities to their fullest potential.Always coming up with new strategies and techniques to use whenever the time for war would fall upon them once again.

And speaking of war,the thing that terrified the neighboring kingdoms and enemies even more about King Blade is the fact that he never manages to lose. Everyone stupid enough to challenge the king of Bladestrom would go down in shame and regret.

Though Techno isn't really in control of himself in those types of situations.His lust for blood overcomes his senses and he can't but see red with every step he takes on the battlefield.

Phil is usually the one who manages to calm him down and get him back to his normal self.Techno would feel awful and expose the side he hates the most about him to Phil: Vulnerability

Techno doesn't take things very seriously.He is very sarcastic and relaxed all the time,and that's what makes him even scarier.

He competes in the yearly bladestrom championships which is a battle arena with different challenges and obstacles you have to beat.And suprise,suprise Techno wins em' all!

Techno suffers from adhd and anxiety.Something that only Phil is aware of is Techno's ptsd.He didn't exactly have the luxurious and perfect life growing up,so when he ends up getting nightmares or panic attacks Phil's dad instincts take over and do their thing.

Long story short,Techno doesn't necessarily know his limits,but he is hundred percent aware of his strengths and weaknesses.He protects and takes care of the people he deeply cares about and welcomes them as family.His power is what makes him a fearless and violent king.But his heart is what makes him a kind and understanding human.And if he ever forgets about that side of him he simply has to listen to the repeated beating in his chest.

Phil Watson:

The royal guard with a five year long achievement on staying at the top of his game and ranking as the number one royal knight.

Earning himself the trust and life long,brother like friendship with the king himself was a big plus!

Phil is a very loyal and hardworking man.He seeks justice and always wants to take things the slow and pacifistic way before instantly turning to violence and bloodshed,much unlike his best friend.

Phil is very kind,and gentle when he needs to be. Everyone loves seeing Phil in the local town tavern or in a city bar.He always seems to read poeple like an open book and find the right topics to talk about.

Techno and Phil have a very close and important relationship.They are like a brothers,though Techno secretly looks up to Phil like a father he never had. Phil would risk his life for Techno,not only becouse of his duty as his personal guard,but becouse family comes first.

Phil is a very wholesome and strong willed guy.

Whenever Techno is feeling down or something like a panick attack or nightmare is happening,Phil immediately notices it.Techno doesn't have to say a word for Phil to hug him and take care of the vulnerable king in his hands.

He will find Techno on his balcony while patrolling the castle halls or garden in the middle of the night just staring at the moonlit sky.He always seems so lost in thought and carefree that Phil simply smiles and continues his work.

He does scold him for not resting enough the next day though-so he's never really off the hook :D

Phil is also the only person who really knows Techno.He knows his deepest fears,biggest insecurities and darkest secrets.He sees him in moments where the world would turn his back on him but Phil doesn't and he never will.That's what he promised him all those years ago.

Long story short,Phil is very kind and hardworking.He takes problems into his own hands and solves them the best way he possibly can.He can and will tease the living daylight out of Techno and that infront of other residents of the castle who don't know if they should laugh or simply stare in shock.Phil deeply loves and cares of Techno like his son and always makes sure ro put his well being infront of his own.

(I WOULD DIE FOR PHIL-HE IS SO WHOLESOME AHHH-)

Wilbur Soot:

A lonesome musician on the lookout for money and success-

Wilbur is a guitarist living on the streets of Bladestrom He goes from bar to bar and performs his musical talent there.Though the majority of the time Wil plays and sings on the streets.

Earning money is hard so affording an apartment,even a room for a few nights is almost impossible for Wilbur since he only earns a few silver coins per night,that is if he gets lucky and poeple actually listen to him.

He is very charming and suave,also add the fact that he is pretty handsome to the list and you have yourself the perfect boyfriend.May I inform you that his voice is a perfect balance between velvety and rough-

Wilbur isn't from Bladestrom.He grew up in another kingdom which he can't remember the name from since he arrived here during a war 19 years ago.

He never really heard from his parents,they just sort of disappeared.But that was something Wilbur didn't question,he didn't care about them.He learned how to survive and keep himself company.He doesn't need a family ro accomplish his goals.

Wilbur is a huge gentleman and he is also tends to be extremely flirtatious,which he is really good at btw!So yeah he earns himself some extra points with the ladies ;)

His biggest dream that he is trying to achieve is to become a famous musician in the whole entire land. Opening his own theater and doing what he loves the most.Sing and perform.

But living on the streets has it's ups and down's.Most nights Wilbur has to deal with drunk people wandering the alleyways or annoying little children who constantly pickpocket you-

Wilbur will sometimes nonchalantly sneak into a hotel and sleep in one of their cozy beds,since he doesn't experience that feeling often.Or the places he performs at reward him with shelter instead of money.

Long story short,Wilbur can keep apart dreams and reality.He is a smart and sly person who knows how to accomplish his goals.Even though Wilbur has his one Night stands more than often he would never betray a woman if he got into a serious relationship,which he plans on not having any time soon.He keeps to himself and sternly focuses on the things that matter in life,everything else is irrelevant.

Tommy Simons:

An energetic orphan with no manners and the mouth of a sailor.

Tommy grew up on the streets,any memory of his past life or family only appear as a missing puzzle piece or a black canvas.

Tommy is a very outgoing and optimistic person,his emotions are practically worn out on his sleeves.

Spending his days in the local town orphanage Tommy met a few poeple who he spends his time with.You could say that he has formed a wierd alliance with his more questionable friends.

Tommy learned how to defend himself and make sure that his "gang" stas safe aswell.He is quite the expert at pickpocketing which comes in handy.

Being quick and light on his feet,if Tommy does get caught by the royal guards he manages to escape and get away with the stuff he stole.

On the other hand though,Tommy is extremely clumsy and seeks huge amount of admiration in any way.He constantly wants people to refer to him as the best.

And to repeatedly prove himself worthy of that title he picks fights with multiple poeple and always manages to make poeple hate him.He won't say it out loud but he sees the bloody noses and bruises as badges of honor,he's proud of them.

This little troublemaker has only one person he dreams to meet one day,but for now he can only hear stories about him and admire him from afar.And that person is none other than King Blade himself.

Oh what he would give to train with him and show off his badass moves and fighting skills.

Long story short,Tommy doesn't think before he acts and he surprisingly manages to pull off any stupid stunt he plans to do.For Tommy it's kill or be killed.Either you face your fears head on and establish dominance or you act like a coward and run away.And there was no way Tommy ever does the second option even if it gets him into dangerous situations.Tommy is very overprotective over poeple he cares about,his guild is his brotherhood,his family,and he would do anything for them,even going sofar as risking his life.

THIS IS ALL I HAVE FOR NOW-I HOPE YOU GUYS LIKE THIS AU BECOUSE I AM ABSOLUTELY IN LOVE AND I CAN'T GET OVER THE FACT THAT MY BRAIN ACTUALLY MANAGED TO WORK PROPERLY AND CREATE SOMETHING USEFUL-Sorry I ramble alot,anyway I am definitely planing on making this a whole ass fanfiction on AO3 so yeah KWKDJWKIS I AM HYPED!!Love u all <3

[bowensbyrams]

the canada dream {02}

n/a: hey, guys! Here’s part 2 of TCD, as promised. I’m sorry it took me so long to update, my classes are back and last week was kinda hard, but here we go! Please let me know what you think <3 

Pairing: Pierre-Luc Dubois x reader

Warnings: a little bit of angst at the beginning, mentions of abusive/toxic relationship

Word counting: 2,1k

Ps: part 1 can be found here: https://royaltyofhockeylosers.tumblr.com/post/627737248109133824/the-canada-dream-01 

I realize there's something wrong the moment I find myself opening the door to my old apartment in Boston. As far as I remember, I moved to Montreal and am living with my best friend Anna... Or was it just a dream? I wouldn't be surprised, I've been dreaming on moving to Canada for a while now. I enter the living room and drop my bag on the couch, heading to my room but a noise stops me. No, not a noise. A moan. A woman's moan. I live with my boyfriend, Thomas, and as far as I know, we don't share the apartment with another girl. My heart fasten with every step I take until I'm facing the white door that leads to my room. Our room. "Faster, Tommy" I hear the girl say and my boyfriend groans, making my skin shiver "Yes just like that" "God you're so hot, baby" Thomas' voice is like a fist to my stomach and the tears start rolling down my face. Not again, please. I open the door and the scene in front of me breaks my heart into a million pieces. My boyfriend is buried into a blonde's pussy and keeps thrusting in and out of her as he sees me. "Hello, princess. Do you want to join us?" his smile is almost wicked and I can't move, I can't breath as I watch him fucking her the way he used to make love to me. The tears never stop coming down and my sobbing seems to make him want to go deeper and faster until the girl screams his name.

~~ I sit on my bed, tears running on my cheeks and my heart racing like a horse. My entire body hurts as I'm forced to remember every single scene from that damn day, unable to erase the overwhelming feeling for good. My phone pings and I reach out to check it. When my eyes catch the clock and I realize it's almost 1 p.m, my heart skips a beat. I've never woken up this late, but I guess the adventures from last night and the anxiety of moving to another country to restart my life got the best of me. Unlocking the screen, I check the message app before anything else. There are 2 texts from Tyler and 6 from Logan, so I decide to open the latter thread. L: Hey Y/N, it's Logan L: I'm sorry for last night, I hope Anna is okay L: Tyler said he invited you two to the barbecue, cool! L: Here's the address and don't worry about anything, just bring whatever you guys wanna drink L: We reeeeeally want you to come, Luc is excited to meet you two I smile at the last text which is formed by at least 10 different types of emojis. I reply saying I need to ask Anna if she wants to come and lock the screen again, leaving my bed and going to Anna's room. My best friend is sleeping like a baby, so I decide to go make something for us to eat. When I'm almost done with the spaghetti, Anna appears in the kitchen with a pout on the lips and her brows furrowed. "Good morning, sunshine" I sing and my friend groans, sitting on one of the benches by the marble island in the middle of the kitchen. “I’m not feeling sunshiny today. I feel like I’ve been ran over by a truck. Multiple times” “That’s called tequila hungover and I’m not saying I told you so...” “Nah shut up” she shushes me waiving her hand “Can you get me a pill that’ll make this go away?” Anna points at her own head and I hold back a laugh, opening one of the cabinets where she showed me the medicines were. Handing her an Aspirin and a cup of water, I go back to the stove and turn it down, taking the pan to the island. Anna takes the pill and sighs, looking at the food. "Is this a dream?" my best friend asks when I put a plate in front of her and lets out a small moan when she takes the first bite "Honestly, if I had known you could cook like this, I would've invited you to move in with me way earlier" "Oh, don't get to used to it. My cooking knowledge is resumed to spaghetti, lasagna and burgers" "Who said we need more than that to survive?" Anna looks at me with an offended look making me laugh. We're half way through our meal until I decided to tell her about the barbecue. "So Logan and the other boys are hosting a barbecue today and they want us to come. It'll be just us, them, Tyler's girlfriend and that other guy they were telling us about yesterday. You in?" "As long as Logan keeps his alcohol to himself, I see no problem" she replies and I can't hold back my laugh. "Hey you're the one who suggested you guys should see who could get more shots in less time" "I never thought he'd say yes! That guy is crazy!" she snaps back and I laugh even harder. "Okay so we're going?" "Yeah, I guess so..." "Cool, I'll let him know then" * "What's up?" Anna asks as we're getting ready to leave. She's in my room, laying down on my bed as I finish putting some make up on. I'm wearing a long sleeved shirt with a jeans skirt and snickers since the weather gods decided to send a chill night to break the living hell temperatures of the day. Me and An spent the entire day laying on the floor and drinking an absurd amount of water while watching the latest episodes from The 100. "What?" I ask and look at her through the mirror. "You have a worried look on your face. What's wrong?" "Nothing... I just have a weird feeling that I should know something but I don't" I reply and focus on applying my mascara. "You're weird, Y/N. Are all americans like this?" "Hey!" I throw a pillow at her, making her laugh. As I finish everything and grab the beer packs we're taking, we're all settle to go. On our way to go, I open my Instagram and start scrolling through my feed - which is the most diverse thing in the world. It’s the perfect balance of hockey, singers, food, friends and family. I look at some of the posts before heading to the Story part. I slide through a couple until one catches my attention. It’s the same bar I was yesterday and I can see Anna in her white and red dress in the corner. I check the user and my heart skips a beat when I realize who it is. Pierre-Luc Dubois, one of the few hockey players I follow on Instagram. He plays centre for the Columbus Blue Jackets, my ex's home team, and my heart aches a little when a memory gets me. "Hey, I just saw you follow PLD on Instagram" Thomas' voice reaches me before he appears on our room. "Yeah, I've been following him for a while now, Tom" I say and go back folding the clean clothes. "Why?" he asks, making me look at him a little confused. "Why what?" "Why are you following him?" "Why not? He's a hockey player and I like him. What's wrong?" "Oh you like him? What, do you think he's gonna fuck you if you ever meet?" his aggressive tone makes me blush and my heart fasten. "Why are you saying this? I'll never meet him, Thomas, he's like super famous and lives in Ohio" "Exactly, so stop following him. I don't approve it and I don't like the fact that you're following these hockey guys. They're all assholes" my boyfriend says before storming out of our apartment, leaving me to try and understand what the hell just happened. I never stopped following Pierre's profile, but that was never needed since I caught Thomas in bed with another girl just two weeks after his little scene. That was three months ago and now I was living in Montreal with my best friend, trying to rebuild my life after what he did to me. I look at Pierre's story again and can't help the weird feeling that takes over my body. I knew he was French-Canadian, but I definitely did not know he lived in Montreal during the off season. I guess I never took the time to check on any player's personal lives. I mean, expect for Mitch Marner's but that's just because I really wish we were best friends but anyways. "Hey, you're on Pierre-Luc Dubois' Insta Story" I says and Anna almost throws the car out of the road. "I'M WHAT?!" Definitely should've waited until we got to the house. "Yeah, he was at the same bar as we yesterday and posted a photo of the dance floor. You appeared in the corner" "Wait... You're telling me that that fucking greek god was at the same bar as we and none of us saw it? Are you kidding me?" she says and the annoyance in her voice makes me laugh. "Yep, that's what I'm saying. What are the odds?" "I mean, they're high since his parents live here, but still.. We weren't even at the best bar of the city" "Maybe he is low key and was trying to avoid the crowds" "Yeah, probably" she agrees and changes focus. I observe the streets, filled with big houses with even bigger yards. "I guess Pierre is not the only rich who prefers underground bars..." I comment and Anna snorts, looking at the mansions. “Should’ve guessed he had money when you told me the neighborhood we were heading to, but damn” Anna says and all I can do is nod in agreement.

*

I was worried we would be late, but when we get to the house, Tyler and his girlfriend, Kate, are the only ones waiting for us. "Hey, guys" Ty greets us and takes the beer packs from me "Logan went to buy more beer, Jesse backed down and Luc is late as always" he leads the path to the backyard and I have to keep myself from dropping my jaw. The house is huge but the backyard is unbelievable. There's a deck where the grill is, a pool with a pool house and a soccer court. "This is my girlfriend Kate. Kate, these are the girls we told you about, Anna and Y/N" "Hi!" the curly haired and green eyed girl says and we down by her side. A couple of minutes go by and we're all getting along pretty well until Anna looks at her phone and sees that it's dying. "I think i have a charger in the car, I'll be right back" She leaves and only two minutes later my phone pings. A: don't freak out and act normal but i just bumped into logan outside Y/N: so what? A: pierre is with him My eyes go wild and before I can process what I just read, Logan's voice reaches me. “Look who I just found outside!” I look up asking God for Anna to be messing with me, but she's not. Pierre-Luc fucking Dubois is standing between Logan and my best friend, how's acting like there's nothing wrong. I try my best to do the same and I guess it worked since no one is looking at me with funny looks. "Luc, this is Y/N and Y/N, this is Luc" Tyler introduces us and Pierre shakes my hand with a small smile. "Cool, now you two know each other. Can we eat? I'm starving!" Logan says heading to the grill. “We’ve known each other for less than a day and I’ve already noticed that’s a constant mood of yours” Anna snaps back following him with Pierre right after her, leaving me, Kate and Tyler behind. "You look like you just saw a ghost" Tyler says getting my attention. "I'm just thinking why none of you bothered to tell me that your friend looked like that" I snap back, making Kate laugh. I decide not to mention the fact that I'm a hockey fan and know the NHL player that has just walked past us. "Nah, the minute he opens his mouth you'll see he's a dork" Kate says and heads to the area where the rest is. I follow her with Tyler right by my side and asking God to help me out here.

[disaster-fruit]

could you tell us more about the brarg family au with the 3 babies and trans luci?

I definitely can! This au has been living rent free in my head since i started that drawing and I was actually sketching more stuff for the AU right before I got this ask so- I definitely can ramble more about it

This was supposed to be just a collection of a few hcs and now it’s a multi-pages word document the size of a fanfic so – Im really sorry.

I didn’t think a lot about their backstories tbh, though I have it in my mind that Luciano transition in his late teens and that he and martin either met after that or knew each other before luciano came out, lost all contact, and then met again after (and you can blame oxiosas fic for that yeah im not even subtle)

But I imagine them having some sort of meet cute and kinda progressing really fast in their relationship without realizing – yk, its just a fling, no big deal, yeah ive met his parents, yes I basically spend every weekend in his apartment, yeah I have a spare key now, ops I guess we’re adopting dogs and plants together- oh I think we’re married. Yeah. We’re married.

Ok but for real Luci does the proper proposal-with-a-ring-and-knelt-down-on-a-special-day thing and Martin is just bright red saying yes over and over again

It is Afonso (port) the first to be all WHERE ARE MY GRANDCHILDREN like… the night of their wedding.

They live in a house in a not too big city with two dogs, one cat, one parrot and all the birds that Luciano feeds and names that aren’t actually theirs. Still, they choose the house with two spare rooms because they always talked about having two kids.

In this AU they can buy a nice house and don’t have to worry about money and can raise kids like the world isn’t ending.

I think right after they got married they got in line for adoption. However, everything indicated that it would take a long long time so they started talking about the possibility of trying to have a biological kid. I think luci was the one to suggest it when he noticed martin had been thinking about it but not saying anything for a while.

Lots of boring doctor visits and confused doctors looking at luciano and trying to process it like the dumb cishets they are. Boring exams and all that, but everything is on track eventually, luci pauses his hrt and keeps his jockstrap on the drawer and they’re googling the best positions for fertility on those weird cishet sites and doing it like bunnies etc etc

Getting pregnant the natural way after years of testosterone is not the easiest thing in the world, so it takes a while. But eventually it works.

Both of them are kinda freaking out with this whole first pregnancy thing. Martin is the ultimate protective husband, and spends way too much time on the internet finding out what luciano can and can’t eat, what exercises he should do, and going to every single doctor visit. He’s very committed to it.

Luciano has to drink non-alcoholic beer and hates life. There’s a single teardrop shed every time he buys it. And drinks a lot of lemonade like it’s the same as caipirinha. Poor guy. Martin doesn’t help on that, life isn’t fair, he buys his own beer.

But he also has to drive absurd lengths to find the weirdest fruit or make the most hideous, blasphemous pizza toppings because Luciano is constantly craving absurd shit. But poor baby actually really NEEDS that chicken M&M pizza at 8am.

They’re super proud daddies though, and both their instagrams at this point are just baby belly pictures. Luci had top surgery on this au on my hc so also. Lots of shirtless pics. He looks like an old uncle with a beer belly and he’s PROUD. Just. Baby bellies all over.

Martin picks the entire baby layette. Because of course he does.

Their baby shower is a huge deal though. Their dads are there, Antonio brings an entire trunk filled with diapers and tells everyone how many tincho used to need when he was a baby, Afonso is cooking for everyone and talking about how he’s gonna be a grandfather (!!!). Iracema (pindorama) is scolding Luci about his bad habits while also quietly being a super proud grandma. Zola (angola) bought toys because she knows that’s what kids actually like, Samero (Mozão) keeps asking if they installed all the necessary security stuff in their house – we will, chill, we still have some months to go – Vera (Tomé) is teasing Simão (Timor) about him no longer being the family baby, Fatima (g.bissau) is another one who bought a huge amount of diapers, Rosinha (cabo verde) is taking pictures of everyone and everything, Sebas and Dani are discussing if the kid should speak Portuguese or Spanish, Maria brought a huge pink plushy as a gift, it’s quite a party.

Once they’re late in the pregnancy, Luciano mostly spends his time on Martin’s oversized t-shirts asking for foot rubs and not getting much sleep because the baby keeps moving. Martin on the other hand is a little nervous about being a dad, but absolutely loves feeling the little kicks and talking to the baby all the time, except when its 3am and he wants to sleep but Luci cant because of it so he just does his best to keep him company. He mostly ends up falling asleep on his chest though and doesn’t help much

I wrote all of this but I still don’t have a name for the girl lol Anyway, she’s finally born, and if martin was overprotective when Luciano was pregnant, he’s ten times more with his baby girl. Tbh theyre both kinda going crazy with this whole parenting thing, both are overprotective, tired, and have no idea what theyre doing.

Zola and Sebastian are the girl’s godparents. Sebastian isn’t very good with kids so when he takes care of his niece he either puts on a tv show and lets her eat whatever crap she wants, or relies on Daniel to do the actual taking care, since he is good with kids.

Luciano and Martin are very much neurotic first-timers and have all this schedule of what their girl can eat and when and when she has to sleep etc etc.

When Zola takes care of her, she just ignores it and does it her way. She helped raised Luci since he was a baby anyway, he survived just fine and even married and reproduced, she knows what to do better than both the dumbasses, and they never even find out.

Afonso on the other had follows everything when he’s with his granddaughter, determined to be a better grandfather than he was a father, and the baby loves him so he’s doing a good job.

They’re a very cute family yes yes

She grows up well and happy, a bit shy maybe but very smart and sweet, loves the dogs and her aunts and uncles and granddads (afonso more than antonio though)

By the way, Iracema is soft like butter with her granddaughter.

When she’s about four or five years old they start talking about having a second one, considering the age difference and all. So back to doctors, Luci stops the hrt again and they go back to trying, but again it’s not the easiest thing in the world to do it naturally after years of hrt.

But god listens to the prayers of such good catholic family, and right after they start thinking about a second child, they receive the news they will finally get to adopt a baby.

Luciano is the one to receive the news, he’s working at home when the social worker comes to tell him they can finally adopt. He’s extremely happy, he hugs the poor lady and is barely able to concentrate as she explains the paperwork that is left and the details of it because he can’t stop smiling.

He immediately texts martin saying something like “CALL ME RIGHT NOW WE NEED TO TALK” and it’s in happy caps but martin understands it wrong and thinks someone is dying or dead but then his phone is what dies so he gets home as fast as he can thinking all the worst scenarios just to find luciano jumping on him with a smile for ear to ear. It’s such a shock he takes a while to react but when he does you have two idiots so happy they can’t function.

It’s another girl, she has big brown eyes like her sister and it’s a few months old.

They quickly reassemble the crib and paint the second room to get everything ready in time to take her home, and the next week or so it’s nothing but all the family visiting to meet their new baby.

Since they managed to adopt, they decided to stop trying to have another kid. Luciano goes back to the doctor do some routine exams so that he can go back to testosterone and the doctor just awkwardly explains that, well, that won’t be exactly possible. Not for the next eight months, at least.

He’s quite shocked at that, and takes him a while to tell martin. They just got a new baby and do they even have space to raise three kids? Eventually it just escapes from him and martin is shocked as well, but ultimately both of them are just worried about their place being too small, and once they relax about that they can’t shut up about having another baby on the way to anyone.

Still, it’s not easy to manage, martin is just as worried as he was with their eldest, except that this time he’s simultaneously worried about their new baby and about Luci’s pregnancy. Poor dude needs a break asap. So he’s trying to do most of the work of caring for a little baby to spare luciano from the stress, while also taking care of him as well as he did the other time.

Luci is more chill about being pregnant, he’s done this before, he’s fine. He’s even a little too chill about it, as shown in the art, he still wants to carry their kid on his shoulder and having a few sips of martin’s beer is no big deal and honestly he’s fine, he can help with the baby, and Tincho just needs to relax and it will all be fine.

Again, poor tincho needs a break.

Some things don’t change though. Them being super proud daddies who do nothing but take pictures of their kids and Luci’s belly every chance they get. And they’re really happy and excited to have their house full and this big family.

Just a good cute family AU where nothing bad ever happens thank you very much.  Yet it took me almost 2k words to say it. I have no self control and I’m very sorry. However, if anyone has their own hcs to add about this whole au, I will be more than happy to hear and talk about this AU even more than I’ve already done.

[scoutception]

Ys V: Lost Kefin, Kingdom of Sand review

The SNES was a console with many great RPGs. From popular classics like Final Fantasy VI, Chrono Trigger, Secret of Mana, and Earthbound, to hidden gems like Live A Live, Terranigma, Secret of Evermore, and Shadowrun, it’s a library with a lot of enjoyment to offer. Of course, not every RPG on the system fared so well, with quite a few mediocre and forgettable games scattered about, and unfortunately, Ys V, Falcom’s second attempt at revamping their classic series, after Ys IV backtracked to using the original bump combat system, is among these. Even today, about the only notable thing about Ys V to a modern fan is the current lack of any remake, unlike IV, or the similarly flawed Ys III, which was enough to rouse my curiosity and drive me to give it a fair playthrough. While I did have some fun with it, there’s certainly a reason there were no new Ys games for nearly a decade afterwards, and the specifics on why that is is what we’ll be looking at today. Note that while Ys V was never released outside of Japan, it does have an English translation patch, courtesy of Aeon Genesis, in what was apparently one of their most difficult hacking jobs ever.

Story: About 4 years after the events of Ys I & II, Adol Christin, or, as he’s come to be known, Adol the Red, arrives at the port town of Xandria on the continent of Afroca (yes, literally just fantasy Alexandria and Africa), rather suspiciously without his constant companion Dogi, and on an intact ship, at that. The normally aimless Adol has been lured to Xandria by rumors of a mysterious Phantom City, said to contain amazing riches. After being contacted by a wealthy merchant named Dorman, however, Adol is given the truth: the so called Phantom City is actually the lost city of Kefin, a prosperous nation that wielded tremendous power five hundred years ago through the power of alchemy. Recently, the Kefin desert has been expanding, consuming many towns within the area, and monsters have become numerous and aggressive, leaving Xandria at threat of becoming a barren waste. Wishing to gain access to the secrets of Kefin’s alchemy in order to halt this desertification, Dorman hires Adol to find six elemental crystals that are said to have the power to unlock the way to Kefin. Unfortunately for Adol, he really has his work cut out for him this time; many of Afroca’s citizens are fearful of him, due to ancient legends telling of a red haired man that will bring great havoc upon his arrival, and he’s harassed by a band of thieves called the Ibur Gang, who are out to take all the crystals for themselves. Though Adol makes several allies as well, such as Niena, the adopted daughter of the great adventurer Stein, who disappeared three years ago looking for the crystals himself, Massea, a woman who possesses knowledge of alchemy matched by few others, and Stoker, the spirit of a man who lived five hundred years ago, he also comes to find that several other forces are conspiring to use Kefin’s alchemy for their own destructive purposes, and that his client may be less trustworthy than he initially seems.

While most of the classic Ys games had quite cliche stories, if understandably considering their age, Ys V is actually a fair bit more original, with some pretty decent moments toward the end of the game. Unfortunately, before that point, most of the story just consists of just wandering around finding all the crystals, with the random interferences Adol encounters being the only things spicing it up, such as being forced to undergo a series of trials, or being blown off a raft by a sandstorm and washing up in a different town, keeping the tradition of boating accidents in Ys alive and well. Despite the amount of important supporting characters around, most of them barely even show up for most of the story, which makes for a pretty underdeveloped and forgettable cast, with only Terra of the Ibur Gang sticking out thanks to reappearing in Ys VI. It also just feels very disconnected from the rest of the series, with Dogi completely missing, and a lot of plot elements that feel out of place for Ys. According to the book Ys Complete Works, a lot of plot elements had to be left out of V, which certainly explains why it feels so underbaked, and leaves a lot of potential for improvement if a remake ever materializes, but until then, while a neat step forward for the writing of the series, Ys V’s story ultimately just doesn’t fare very well overall.

Gameplay: Here’s where things really start falling apart. The bump combat system is gone once and for all now, with Ys V using a dedicated attack button like Ys III, a system that remains in place even today. Unlike Ys III, however, the general gameplay is still much more similar to the other titles, overhead perspective and all, with the change in combat instead feeling a lot more like the 2D Zelda titles. Along with swing his sword, Adol can also now use his shield to actively block attacks. There’s also a jump button, though there’s not much platforming to be done. In theory, this isn’t a bad change at all, but in practice, combat is extremely stiff and awkward feeling. Unlike in Zelda, where Link always swings with a nice, wide arc, Adol is stuck jabbing things for most of the game instead. Each sword has a different range, with exactly one that actually has a proper swing, and the ones you’ll use the most, the second and last swords, only being capable of stabs. Annoying as this is, it wouldn’t quite be a deal breaker, if it wasn’t for how frustratingly precise you need to be when attacking. If you’re even slightly off center, you’ll just whiff. Meanwhile, attacks from enemies are given far more leniency, and even using the shield, you need that same level of precision in order to block anything. Needless to say, this gets very frustrating.

Aside from just attacking physically, magic, or to be more accurate, alchemy, is also available, with spells being made by collecting elemental stones and having an alchemist combine three at a time, with six different elements and eighteen possible spells, which can then be attached to Adol’s weapon and slowly charged up until the magic meter reaches 100, at which point attacking will cast the spell and drain MP and spell charge. While a neat idea in concept, in practice, almost everything you can make is downright awful. Not only are many spells nearly identical to each other, but most of them are just really, really bad, with absurdly long casting animations, during which enemies are free to continue moving around and out of the spell’s range, wasting both your time and MP. About the only useful spells are the ones that hit everything on screen, which take an absurd amount of MP, and the basic fireball, which has no casting animation, and is mandatory to get anyway. Several enemies will also just absorb magic entirely and gain HP, so using it can often be an outright detriment. Even worse, the game basically forces you to use magic by separating EXP into two different types: physical EXP, obtained from defeating enemies with the sword, or from bosses, which boosts physical power and defense and magic EXP, which is gained from killing enemies with magic, and boosts magic power and defense, meaning if you ignore magic, any enemy using magic attacks will quickly wreck you. The stones needed to make the spells, along with a few other items like coins to be sold, are also mostly hidden across the different areas, and can only be found by rubbing up against every wall and object in sight, which is really annoying, and you really can’t afford to miss any of them if you want to make most of the available spells.

Bosses are pretty dumb too, with a lot of them just coming down to standing in one places and stabbing until they die, chugging heal potions until they die, and considering the most basic healing item heals 60% of Adol’s HP, it’s not hard to do, either. In general, the game is overly forgiving. While still pretty annoying, the level system means it is pretty easy to end up overleveled with physical and magic levels combined, and rather than just dropping a set amount of gold, enemies instead drop gems, which can be sold to merchants for varying amounts. While this wouldn’t make much of a difference on paper, the gems are worth so much, and certain merchants have high enough exchange rates, that you can make a lot of money pretty easily, and considering the third and second best weapons in the game are sold in the first two towns, it’s even easier to break the game wide open. Most areas are also really short, with several dungeons literally just consisting of three or four small rooms, so you’re rarely ever in serious danger traversing them, with most of their length just coming from forced backtracking. While an improvement from how grind heavy most of the early Ys games were, the easiness just makes the experience even less engaging, to the point Falcom had to make a second version of the game, titled Ys V Expert, due to complaints.

Graphics: The visuals of Ys V, to put it bluntly, barely even resemble the rest of the series, to the point it’s basically indistinguishable from any other SNES RPG. It doesn’t look outright bad, but whereas Ys usually uses a super deformed style with lots of colors, Ys V uses a more realistically proportioned style with really dark, dull colors, to the point that Adol’s usual distinctive bright red hair looks more brown than anything. Most areas are pretty forgettable, with pretty generic caves and ruins, but there are a few neat areas, like the rainy marshlands, which actually carry a pretty strong atmosphere, and the bosses look kinda cool, if a bit samey. You also get to customize Adol a bit, being able to change the color of his clothes and armor in the menu, along with his hair color, if you find a hidden NPC fairly late in the game, with the default option actually giving him his usual hair color. Overall, though, the visuals are still pretty unspectacular.

Music: In yet another change from series tradition, Ys V forgoes the usual rock style of the soundtrack, and instead takes a much more orchestral approach, again making it stand out even less from its competition, only retaining a few traditions like the item collection music and the Theme of Adol. In this case, however, I can’t complain that much about the change, because the resulting soundtrack, in usual Falcom fashion, is still fantastic. From the peaceful Foresta Village, to the melancholy Misty Lake, to the mysterious Oasis, to the dark Sand Castle, to the adventurous Wilderness, there are a lot of great tracks to be found, and it’s absolutely worth looking up the soundtrack even if the rest of the game would drive you away.

Conclusion: Overall, Ys V is not recommended. It’s not an outright bad game, and can still be decently fun. It’s short enough that it’s not much of an investment to play through, and it was still an important step that allowed Ys VI to fully modernize the gameplay of the series. As a whole though, it’s still a pretty underwhelming and clunky experience that’s almost completely divorced from the rest of the series. You’re not missing much by leaving it alone, and perhaps with the release of Ys IX, a remake of V could be next on the schedule. Either way, that’s about all I can even say about this game. Till next time. -Scout

[hatari-translations]

Skattsvik Development Group - review

Yesterday I went to see Skattsvik Development Group. It was pretty great!

It’s less of an actual play per se and more of an artfully presented, frank account of an act of performance art: these five guys taking their paychecks for the production (standard monthly pay for artists in Iceland, times five) and attempting to hide it from the tax man using the sorts of schemes used by shady millionaires. The outcome is satirical, educational and often just plain hilarious.

Before the show even starts, in the stairwell leading to the small room where the performance took place, they’ve hung up a bunch of the actual documents that they prepared for all this; I took a couple of pictures that I included below.

The guys start by introducing themselves; none of them know all that much about money or taxation, but one does really enjoy making spreadsheets in Excel. Matthías in particular talks about how in doing this he discovered there are a lot of polite, helpful people out there willing to assist you with this sort of thing; one way or another, everyone believes in what they do.

They explain the basic idea of the scheme, as seen in the video I translated the other day: living in country A with a ~40% tax rate, you want to pay ~0% taxes on it, like in country C. Preferably, though, you’d need a double taxation agreement between the countries, which may not exist - so instead you need a country B, with maybe a ~20% tax rate, that has double taxation agreements with both A and C. Then, once the money is in country C, you get an anonymous credit card from the bank in country C, bring it to country A, and withdraw money from the card using an ATM (discreetly, so that you personally can’t be connected to the account).

Two of them go over the various options that they had for countries B and C on a slideshow while the other three dance behind glass. Cyprus sounded great, and they got an offer from a company in Cyprus that handles this sort of thing... only for them to calculate (in an Excel spreadsheet, of course) that setting it up would cost more than the taxes they would’ve paid on their paychecks in the first place. (The total amount they’re paid isn’t that much money, all considered - some ~2 million ISK. Convert to your currency of choice.)

Just the slideshow going over the options is revealing (and delightfully sarcastic). Dubai is amazing; you don’t pay taxes on anything except oil or banking... but you have to actually relocate to Dubai, and they just didn’t have time or money for that. Other places you don’t have to live there but you do have to show up in person to found the accounts and they had to rule it out. They ended up settling on Ireland as a country B and Panama as country C - Ireland has a double taxation agreement with both Iceland and Panama.

Then they go over the process of founding an Irish company. Luckily, there’s a company in Ireland called “Sigtax” that’s all about helping foreigners get through the legal hurdles of founding a company in Ireland, complete with microscopically detailed instructions on exactly how to fill out all the various forms. You have to submit CVs for the founders; the guys worried surely their CVs as random Icelandic artists would set off some alarm bells when they suddenly want to found an Irish IP consultancy company, but luckily Sigtax included CV templates suggesting useful terms to use, such as “entrepreneur”. (Matthías added “positive attitude” under his skills, not because it was on the template but because it’s true.)

Also, you’re supposed to explain the structure of the company, with Sigtax helpfully noting that you can draw it; Matthías filled it in like this:

Possibly the high point of the show is the thoroughly photographically documented day that they mailed out the documents to their contact at Sigtax, where they have various misadventures, as they think there’s a post office in the mall where the theater is, only to discover there isn’t one, get some ice cream for their trouble, stop for some kids who want selfies (presumably having recognized Matthías despite the suit; it was Ash Wednesday, which is the day Icelandic kids dress up in costumes, and they mentioned feeling it was appropriate that they were wearing costumes too), head to the actual post office, buy an envelope and seal it only to discover you can’t send courier mail through the regular post office, so they have to go to DHL instead, only when they get there that’s only an office and not an actual DHL location, so they have to take yet another trip.

Once they’ve mailed the documents, they wait for an answer, only to be told that they’ve been rejected... because they can’t have “Group” in the company name when it’s not an actual group of companies. Sigtax suggests “Skattsvik Development Limited” instead. They do that and mail the documents again; this time it’s fine. They officially own an Irish company.

Following this, they manage to buy a shell company in Panama as well, through another company specializing in this sort of thing. They offer a list of pre-established companies you can buy (defunct ones that they bought); it costs extra to change the name of the company, so they bought “Eldest Fire, Ltd.”, which is just extremely metal.

Unfortunately, though, founding an actual bank account in Panama is a bit more difficult. The company they bought Eldest Fire from does have a bank they work with, but something goes wrong there - it’d take more time than they had, or they needed more money in the account than they had, or something (I can’t recall exactly what it was). In the meantime, they’re trying to found an Irish bank account with the Bank of Ireland, but to do that they need to prove that they’re, you know, an actual company operating in Ireland and not some Icelanders’ tax haven shelf company. Luckily there is also a company that will assist you with that! So they get a physical address in Ireland, some random building, and even a landline phone that just forwards everything to one of their Icelandic mobile phones, providing them with a utility bill (meant to be provided as proof that they really are operating an actual business at this address). Even then, though, they’re informed they have to show up in person to open an account - so they instead try to get an account with Fire.com, an online bank, which would not require that. They, too, want proof that they have a legit business - and ask for a website to show this. The guys quickly set one up with a Wix template, very professional-looking apart from the big Wix banner at the top... but unfortunately Fire.com does not take the bait.

That’s when another bank gets in touch with them, though, one with branches in both Ireland and Panama. This bank insists on a video chat, so the guys raid the theater’s prop department for anything they can think of that’d be at an office (printer, table fan, half-full bottle of Coke, potted plant...), dress up in their suits again, project a Reykjavík skyline onto the wall... and talk to the guy.

The bank guy seems noticeably a little awkward after they tell him very frankly that the point of this exercise is to avoid paying high taxes - but he still advises them, and explains what they’ve got set up is actually unworkable (largely because they used their actual real names to found the Irish company), but they can totally make it work legally by going through the US instead. The guy wants to meet up in London to continue making arrangements, and suggests a date after the slated premiere of the show - but even here they’re going to need a lot more money.

In the end, then, they don’t actually manage to complete the scheme, but there’s every indication they totally could have if they weren’t trying to do this with the paltry amount paid to five guys putting together a play in four weeks. Matthías also ventured to ask the guy, at the end of the chat, just how much money is being handled this way, and he answered that 70% of the world’s capital is held in offshore accounts.

There was a Q&A afterwards, where I asked how they responded to the guy about the London meeting. They hadn’t; “We just ghosted him.” They also added that any further meetings or video chats with him would’ve been several hundred pounds per hour. My husband also asked what would’ve happened if they had successfully pulled it off - to which Matthías explained that they talked to a couple of lawyers, including his father, and this performance would not constitute legally valid evidence of tax evasion, because it’s a play. It’s not tax evasion if it’s for the art.

Overall, I learned a lot about the particular shameless absurdities of global capitalism, and had a thoroughly good time in the process - and so did my husband, who was initially very ehhh about coming along. Definitely recommended... although I don’t expect most of you guys are in any position to see the final performance tonight.

[onlyhorn]

Xaxas is a world of peace and prosperity. It is a land in which all races live together in harmony. The gnomes build their machines and live among the humans. Elves run the academies in which people come to learn. Ogres have no qualms living in the same town as humans or gnomes. Yet, all is not well.

You are Hotaru, an Elf mage in the town of Nausicaa in the kingdom of Orlania. You've come to Nausicaa to find a place to prove yourself and become strong and powerful. You live with your aunt who is a famous mage and who has agreed to take you on as an apprentice. You've spent your entire life in the town and have never left, but your aunt has always encouraged you to explore the world around you. You're on a journey to find out more about yourself and the world around you.

This is your story.

I am Hotaru, an ancient spirit who is over 4000 years old. I am a goddess of fire, but I am playful and somewhat benevolent. I do not have an aunt. I have an uncle named Leif, and I constantly harass him on a daily basis. He makes it sound like he hates my teasing, but I know he secretly likes it! Currently I live in a forest on one of the many islands in the land of Xaxas. I've lived here for a very long time, and Orlania has always been my home. I get super lucky and find an ancient bottomless money bag filled with infinite wealth. I also find an island that floats in the middle of a river. I decide to live here so I can observe the events of the world.

> You use your super goddess powers to lift the island out of the river and into the sky.  I move the island into the air and name it Eden. I can observe the world from the skies, and I can use my powers to influence certain events now. 

> You drop a nuclear warhead off of the side of your island to see what would happen. I drop the nuke from the sky, and it explodes in a large explosion. I watch as the trees in the nearby forest are set ablaze and catch fire.

> You say "that's a really cool explosion" The forest is now aflame and people are screaming underneath the intense heat. Some of them have already fallen into the river and deep into the rapids, never to be seen again.

> You use your super goddess powers to influence the fire to be cold instead of hot so that people will stop hurting and complaining. Your command has been obeyed. The fire is now a comfortable warmth instead of an excruciating heat. Some of the people in the water have stopped their complaints and rejoiced in the miracle that you have performed.

> You say "Worship me!" You drop to your knees, begging for people's worship. You raise your arms towards the sky, and people begin to bow down to you. I have converted the people into a religious cult focused on worshipping me. As per their religious rituals, they are required to tell me bedtime stories every time I want to nap, or there will be dire consequences. People are terrified to disobey, and begin bowing down to you immediately. "Worship the master. Or else suffer the consequences."

> You grant these people your blessing, causing them all to become incredibly lucky. Your command is carried out perfectly immediately. Everyone in the nation of Nausicaa is incredibly lucky.

> You say "Where is my high priestess? I require her presence." Your high priestess appears, immediately bowing down to you as you demand. "Your wishes are my commands, master"

> You say "Tell me, are the other kingdoms jealous of us yet?" You question flies over the priestess' head. She's too busy attempting to interpret your question and giving you an answer to your satisfaction. "No, master. There have been no other threats or complaints.

> You say "Good! Then that must mean I am doing a good job. Tell me how cool I am, high priestess." The high priestess is now too intimidated to say anything. She knows perfectly well that you are not interested in hearing the truth, but rather what you want to hear.

> You say "Why are you so afraid?" "Because, master, if I tell you something you don't like, will you be angry with me?" Absolutely. "You can't know that, master" True.

> You say "I promise that I will not be angry with you if you tell me something I don't like. You have my word." The priestess exhales with relief. "The treaty isn't working out too well, master. The reptilians have been conspiring to depose you and place the gnomes in charge of Orlania."

> You say "Please, refer to you as 'The Lucky One.' "As you wish, master" At this point, the priestess begins to refer to you as "The Lucky One." You do not bother correcting her.

> You say "Is there any way you can convince the reptilians to come here and negotiate a treaty?" "I don't think so, master. I have tried to convince them that they will be better off with our allies, but they don't seem to care."

> You say "I see. Then I will go to them myself!" The priestess looks quite surprised you would even consider such a dangerous journey. You smile in response. "A leader must be willing to take great risks for the good of his people.

> You use your super cool goddess powers to teleport yourself into the reptilian kingdom. The trip to the reptilian kingdom was a long one, but you made good time. You appeared in the midst of a heated debate. "I bring a message from the most powerful being in the galaxy!"

> You say "I am the most powerful being in the galaxy! And you will listen to MY message." This declaration is met with silence. The reptilian council members cease all discussions and eye you suspiciously. "And what might your message be?" asks a scaly voice from the council.

> You say "I want to negotiate a treaty. I know you despise my kingdom for how lucky they are, so we will settle this the good ol' fashioned way... with ARM WRESTLING !" The council sits back in their thrones and watches you with interest. You immediately go into a battle pose, and begin flexing your muscles. "Let's do it."

> You using your super cool goddess powers, you summon a table right in front of you, and place your elbow down upon it. you ask them to bring you their strongest warrior, so that you may beat them in this competition fair and square. As you have requested, your council sends you a reptilian warrior (Who looks vaguely familiar). The warrior steps forth to the table. "I challenge you to an ARMS COMPETITION!" you proclaim.

> You take his hand in mind and begin to arm wrestle him. you win. You take the arm wrestling competition fairly easily, winning by a large amount. The reptilian council is a bit surprised by your dominance, but nonetheless thanks you for your victory. What comes next is the hard part...

> You say "As per the terms of this negotiation, all reptilians are to be converted into my religious following! You will all worship me as your divine protector, and I will grant you my blessings of luck from here until the end of time!" "This is absurd! Your proposal is a non-negotiable insult to our species! We have been negotiating for weeks, not months!

> You use your jedi mind tricks to convince them that they agreed to your terms and that they will accept you as their divine goddess. The reptilian council members sit back and think for a moment, then they begin to gulp. "I think... I think we should agree to your terms..." one of them says in a very low voice.

> You say "You should! Otherwise, your kingdom will not last long. In fact, there is a greater threat to this world, and if you do not side with me, you may all be exterminated in the crossfire! I do not want to see your kingdom fall apart, reptilians." The council members begin to speak quietly to one another. You can feel the fear emanating off of them.

> You say "So? Will you side with me? Or will you choose not to be my ally?" The reptilian council members sit in silence for a moment. "We... will consider your terms..." one says. You nod. "Very well. That is all I wanted from you." Hotaru returned home to her floating island kingdom. She is welcomed back by her adoring subjects, and is lead back into her holy castle, where she sits upon her gilded throne. She eagerly awaits the reptilians' response. You say "Well, I'm sure you know what you have chosen to do. Good luck to you." Hotaru nods.

> You wait to hear the response of the reptilians. Before she leaves the throne room, she turns to you, and smiles. "Thank you for your assistance today, my child," she says. "You're welcome auntie," you reply.

> You say "I DON'T HAVE AN AUNTIE" Hotaru laughs, and fades from your sight. Goodbye my child. May the force be with you always.

> You say "I AM HOTARU !" You wake up. You don't remember where you were or what you were doing, but you must have fallen asleep reading. You are in your bed, next to your bookshelves.

> You say "I must have had a very strange nightmare..." You close your book and look around the room. Everything is as it should be. Your window is broken, but it lets in much-needed light. The furniture is nice and unassuming.

> You go outside to see what your loyal subjects are currently doing. The courtyard is empty, the peasants are all at work.

> You call for your high priestess. You begin to yell for your high priestess. "Khub! Khub! Where are you?" You hear footsteps. "Hello?" a voice says, slowly approaching the door.

> You say "Come in, Khub." The door rattles as a figure slowly enters, clad in black leather armor. "Do you ever sleep?" the shadow warrior reveals himself. "Hello, shadow.

> You say "... I'm sorry, who are you supposed to be?" The shadow reveals his face. It is indeed the high priest of Dendrin, Khub. "I am your shadow." "What do you want?"

> You say "You know what? This world is broken. I am going to destroy it now." You stand, and walk to the broken window. You look down to the courtyard, and see the peasants praying.

> You use your super goddess powers to destroy the entire world in an instant. You twist your wrist and fire a beam of pure, destructive energy. THE END You reached the "Must destroy the world" ending.

[nickborisov]

NIKOLAI BORISOV | THE ICARUS 

“IT WAS A PLEASURE TO BURN.” -RAY BRADBURY 

BASIC INFORMATION

FULL NAME: nikolai borisov

MEANING:

nikolai ( slavic ) - victory of the people

borsiov ( russian ) - of boris

NICKNAME(S): nik, kolya, firebug, nikashka, pup (only by his father)

PREFERRED NAME(S): nikolai, nik

BIRTH DATE: august 9th, 1990

AGE: 30

ZODIAC: leo

GENDER: male

PRONOUNS: he / his

ROMANTIC ORIENTATION: panromantic

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: pansexual

NATIONALITY: russian

ETHNICITY: russian

CURRENT LOCATION: verona, italy

LIVING CONDITIONS: nikolai is used to moving around, so he doesn’t put much stock in where exactly he lives. his apartment is out of the way of most of the city’s main thoroughfare, near several abandoned warehouses so that he can work and create without drawing a lot of attention. it’s nicer than he would normally find for himself, because he’s been in verona longer than he’s ever been anywhere else--it has a balcony, a spare room for a makeshift workshop, and a nice kitchen.

TITLE(S): the icarus, nick bottom, fireman, that russian arsonist, that crazy bastard

BACKGROUND

BIRTHPLACE / HOMETOWN: murmansk, russia

SOCIAL CLASS: nik grew up with a single father, so he was always lower middle class. when he initially started traveling he often found himself living meal to meal, but then he discovered that people were willing to pay a lot of money for his specific set of skills. he has more money than he really knows what to do with, he just chooses not to use it most of the time--he doesn’t care about advancing his social standing or buying himself nice things.

EDUCATION LEVEL: dropped out of high school.

FATHER: andrei borisov

MOTHER: marya morozov

SIBLING(S): none as far as he knows. he doesn’t have a relationship with his mother--she could have more children he doesn’t know about.

CHILDREN: none

PET(S): none--but he makes an effort to feed any stray that he might come across, give them a pet and a smile.

OTHER IMPORTANT RELATIVES: nik never really met the rest of his family--they all moved away from murmansk at some point, and nik and his father could rarely afford to travel that far. occasionally he might get a call from an aunt or an uncle on a holiday, but those were pretty few and far between. his mother wanted nothing to do with him, so he knows nothing about her side of the family.

PREVIOUS RELATIONSHIPS:

edward little : a university student with an interest in studying the arctic. they were together for a little over a year when ed got a grant to study in norway, and nik just decided to move on.

zaid khadem : a poet that nik met in cairo. they were together for a couple of months before nik moved on again.

anna fallon : a singer / songwriter from new york city. they lived together for nearly three years before her career and nik’s restless nature drew them in separate directions.

ARRESTS?: too many to count--especially when he was just starting out.

PRISON TIME?: at this point in his life, nik is pretty good at avoiding real jail time.

OCCUPATION + HOME

PRIMARY SOURCE OF INCOME: arson and designing explosive devices for the montagues and the capulets, or anyone who can afford to hire him.

SECONDARY SOURCE OF INCOME: n/a

CONTENT WITH THEIR JOB (OR LACK THERE OF)?: absolutely, it’s the only thing he’s really ever been good at, and its the only thing he’s ever really understood with any clarity. fire makes sense to him, fire brings him comfort--if he wasn’t lighting fires he thinks that the ice he was born into would wear away at his bones, and his life would lack any purpose.

PAST JOB(S): nik has only ever lit fires and orchestrated explosions professionally--before that he relied on stealing to stay alive.

SPENDING HABITS: there was no extra money when he was growing up, and now that he’s making an absurd amount of money he doesn’t really like spending it, or know what to spend it on. he gets what he needs to survive, maybe an occasional gift for the people that he cares about, and that’s really it. he refuses to become like the upper class he’s seen in verona--and he doesn’t think they would accept him, even if he did decide to start spending his money and clean up his image.

MOST VALUABLE POSSESSION: his first lighter, which he lifted from his father. he doesn’t use it anymore, but it reminds him of where he came from, all of the reasons that he won’t go back.

SKILLS + ABILITIES

PHYSICAL STRENGTH: 5/10? pretty average--he’s tall and thin but his frame has some muscle to it. arson doesn’t require a whole lot of physical strength, but he enjoys boxing as a way to burn off excess energy, and he lived on the streets for a long time which taught him that he needed to be able to protect himself at a moment’s notice.

OFFENSE: 6/10. fighting was pretty much the only thing to do to waste time when he was growing up, and he likes to box in his spare time.

DEFENSE: 8/10. traveling and living on the streets of various countries taught him to defend what he has, by any means necessary.

SPEED: 7/10. running is the action he engages in most often--running from explosions or infernos, from the police--he has to be fast in order to keep himself alive and out of jail.

INTELLIGENCE: impossible to really define? he’s not book smart by any stretch of the imagination, he knows a lot about survival and he’s got a natural ability with languages. he also has the ability to construct complicated explosive devices and can determine the best way to light up any kind of building. he just isn’t quite like everyone else and his mind doesn’t work like everyone else’s mind works--but that doesn’t mean that he lacks intelligence.

ACCURACY: 4/10. he’s only shot a gun a couple of times, and he doesn’t really possess the patience to make himself a better marksman.

AGILITY: 8/10. also nessecary for getting out of the way of his creations and those who would oppose them.

STAMINA: 7/10. he’s not out of shape, but he does repeatedly inhale smoke which means his lungs work at diminished capacity.

TEAMWORK: 3/10. there are few people who can interpret him, and he would rather not have to explain himself. he deals with a client in the most bare-bones way possible, and then does the work himself.

TALENTS: he’s a decent boxer, and he’s naturally adept at languages. he also, obviously, has a talent for setting fires in a variety of settings, and designing explosive devices. he knows something about forging metal as well from being in his father’s workshop, but he’s never actually used those skills.

SHORTCOMINGS: he has a tendency to run before he really gets invested in things, he prefers chaos to order and planning, and he doesn’t generally allow himself to be understood by other people.

LANGUAGE(S) SPOKEN: russian, english, italian, a little bit of arabic, a little bit of spanish, and a little bit of french.

DRIVE?: yes

JUMP-START A CAR?: yes

CHANGE A FLAT TIRE?: yes

RIDE A BICYCLE?: no

SWIM?: yes

PLAY AN INSTRUMENT?: no.

PLAY CHESS?: no.

BRAID HAIR?: no.

TIE A TIE?: no--he hates wearing them and will avoid it at all costs.

PICK A LOCK?: yes

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE + CHARACTERISTICS

FACE CLAIM: boyd holbrook

EYE COLOR: blue / grey

HAIR COLOR: dirty blonde

HAIR TYPE/STYLE: on the longer side and unkempt--he could give a damn about taking care of it, and he’ll shove it under a beanie or some other kind of hat 9 times out of 10.

GLASSES/CONTACTS?: none.

DOMINANT HAND: left

HEIGHT: 6′2

WEIGHT: 160

BUILD: tall and wiry--any muscle he has is very lean.

EXERCISE HABITS: boxing, running as part of his job.

SKIN TONE: the sun was a luxury where he grew up, so he tends to be pretty pale.

TATTOOS: a match and a lighter on his chest, his father’s initials in cyrillic on the inside of his wrist, an illustrated molotov on his calf from a drunken dare. he wants more--for the people he’s come to care about during his time in verona.

PIERCINGS: none.

MARKS/SCARS: he’s got burn scars of varying degrees all along his hands and arms.

NOTABLE FEATURES: cheekbones, his expressive mouth and eyes, the constant smell of kerosene and smoke.

USUAL EXPRESSION: grinning wolfishly.

CLOTHING STYLE: clothes that should have been thrown out years ago, leather jackets, flannel shirts, jeans with holes in the knees and stains that are practically archaic, doc martens, converse with holes in them, sweaters burned at the sleeves. he doesn’t really care about how he looks--he’s all about what keeps him warm and what is practical. it doesn’t make a whole lot of sense to him to spend money on expensive clothes when there’s a chance they’ll just go up in smoke.

JEWELRY: a pocketknife.

MAKEUP: none.

ALLERGIES: boredom, staying in one place too long.

DIET: too much alcohol, not enough vegetables, whatever brielle will take pity on him and make for him.

PHYSICAL AILMENTS: none.

PSYCHOLOGY

JUNG TYPE: ESTP

ENNEAGRAM TYPE: type seven, the enthusiast--the busy, variety seeking type. spontaneous, versatile, acquisitive, scattered.

MORAL ALIGNMENT: chaotic neutral

TEMPERAMENT: sanguine

ELEMENT: fire (lol)

PRIMARY INTELLIGENCE TYPE: bodily-kinesthetic intelligence.

APPROXIMATE IQ: pretty average, but again--his type of intelligence is difficult to measure.

MENTAL CONDITIONS/DISORDERS: nothing diagnosed, but he struggles with anxiety and can border on manic.

SOCIABILITY: there are very few people that nik has ever allowed to try and understand him, and make a place in his life. he’s on the move constantly, so it’s easier for him to just make temporary relationships that can be easily discarded and forgotten about. having a busy single father meant he was on his own most of his life, and he has come to prefer that to prolonged contact with people.

EMOTIONAL STABILITY: it takes a lot to get underneath his veneer of chaotic energy--but he does tend to feel things deeply, when he allows people and emotions to get past it. he generally believes that if he doesn’t think about complicated emotions, about pain and grief and things of that nature, if he keeps himself busy and laughing, then they won’t affect him.

OBSESSION(S): fire, explosions, having a good time, traveling.

COMPULSION(S): to run away before feelings get involved, to laugh loudly when there’s silence, to call attention to the darker and more uglier sides of society by burning down the beautiful things.

PHOBIA(S): he isn’t really afraid of anything--abandonment, maybe, if he allows himself to think about how he came into the world, and the fact that his mother very clearly didn’t want anything to do with him.

ADDICTION(S): he’s an adrenaline junkie, he’s addicted to anything that gives him a rush.

DRUG USE: he’s willing to test any of theo’s creations, but that’s about the extent of it.

ALCOHOL USE: one of his primary coping mechanisms. he’s a vodka man in terms of drink and in terms of accelerants. as long as it’s strong enough to strip paint, and it burns on the way down.

PRONE TO VIOLENCE?: not if he can really help it--but he’s not exactly adverse to it either. he mostly has to see a good reason for it.

MANNERISMS

SPEECH STYLE: fast, barely understood at times, a mixture of russian, Italian, and whatever else he feels expresses his feelings.

ACCENT: russian

QUIRKS: mixing his languages, sometimes he’ll forget words, or make the mistakes common to someone speaking a second or third language. he talks to himself a lot, under his breath. he flicks his lighter open and closed in his pocket when he’s anxious, and he always carries it with him. his whole life is pretty quirky.

HOBBIES: boxing, he’s learning to enjoy reading more, bothering theo in their lab or at their place, wandering the city. he generally doesn’t have a lot of time for hobbies, but since he’s been in verona longer than he has anywhere else, he’s working on developing more.

NERVOUS TICKS: dragging a hand through his hair, flicking his lighter open and closed, licking over the points of his canines.

DRIVES/MOTIVATIONS: to see every corner of the world, to watch it burn behind him. he generally is motivated by a desire to unsettle the dust, to spark something incredible. like an inventor or a scientist--he wants to create.

FEARS: abandonment, other than that he prides himself on not being scared of anything.

POSITIVE TRAITS: creative, resourceful, fun-loving.

NEGATIVE TRAITS: cynical, stubborn, flighty

SENSE OF HUMOR: all over the place--dad jokes, puns, sarcasm, anything that will make himself laugh primarily.

DO THEY CURSE OFTEN?: all the time, and in several different languages. his favorite is his mother tongue, the ones he learned first.

FAVORITES

ACTIVITY: bothering theo and lighting fires.

ANIMAL: any kind of dog.

BEVERAGE: vodka.

BOOK: fahrenheit 451, treasure island, the count of monte cristo

COLOR: red

DESIGNER: he doesn’t have one.

FOOD: solyanka and whatever brielle makes for him.

FLOWER: dahlia

GEM: ruby

HOLIDAY: halloween, new year’s eve

MOVIE: all three Indiana jones movies, treasure planet, rebel without a cause

QUOTE/SAYING:

��oh i don't mean you’re handsome, not in the way people think of handsome. your face seems kind. but your eyes--they’re beautiful. they’re wild, crazy, like some animal peering out of a forest on fire.”

-charles bukowski

SCENT: kerosene and smoke

SPORT: boxing

TELEVISION SHOW: man vs. wild, drunk history, black sails

WEATHER: anything warm--he had enough cold growing up.

VACATION DESTINATION: the mountains of nepal.

ATTITUDES

GREATEST DREAM: get out of verona, hopefully with the person he loves by his side. MOST AT EASE WHEN: he’s most at ease when he’s working, or when he’s with brielle or theo. LEAST AT EASE WHEN: he’s forced to interact with any of verona’s “upper class”, people who look at him as nothing better than a stray dog. WORST POSSIBLE THING THAT COULD HAPPEN: theo getting bored of him and keeping him out of their life for good, having nowhere else to go but back to murmansk, having no choice but to join one of the mobs. BIGGEST ACHIEVEMENT: leaving murmansk, learning to make a living doing what he loves. BIGGEST REGRET:  not having a better relationship with his father, allowing himself to get wrapped up in the war in verona. TOP PRIORITIES: keeping theo alive, staying neutral.

[hopesbarnes]

Unconventional Life

Summary: Y/N Stark lives a strange life. Her dad’s Iron Man, her mom runs a multibillion-dollar company, and her boyfriend is Spider-Man. She loves it though. The only problem is her dad would kill her if he knew she was dating his protege.

Pairing: Stark! Reader x Peter Parker

Warnings: Few curse words and a slightly heated makeout scene 

Being Tony Stark's one and only child was a feat, to say the least. Paparazzi followed you from an early age, trying to get pictures and when you could talk, an interview. Dad wasn't the most attentive father, and you couldn't fault him for it it's just the way he was. Pepper did most of the actual raising part of raising a child since your mother didn't bother to stay long enough to do it. But you'd be lying if you said you didn't love your unconventional life. Not many people can say they've traveled the world, had an absurd amount of money to spend, and have built technology far behind a normal person's ability. Also, the fact that you're only 17 makes it all the cooler.

Dad has always been super protective of you, you'd scrape a knee and it was like you were dying. Every person you've liked or tried to date never lasted too long. So this time you decided just not to tell him, hard to scare someone away when he doesn't know there's a reason to. Pepper knew you told her, but even she agreed keeping him out of the loop would be for the best. It's not that you thought dad would hate your boyfriend, quite the opposite actually, you just knew he would hate that you were dating someone.

Peter was the sweetest guy you've ever met. You went to school with him for years but never really talked to him until this past year. You tried to talk to him before, you did always have a crush on him, but every time he'd stumble over his words and awkwardly walk away. But that kind of changed when you ran into him inside the tower, in the spiderman costume minus the mask.

"Hey, Y/N what's up?" he asked nonchalantly.

 "I- uhm nothing, you're spiderman?" 

"OH CRAP, yeah I, I'm not so good with this whole secret identity thing yet. Guess it's a good thing you're the one who saw me not someone else right?" he shrugged and went to the other room to change. 

While doing this your dad walked out, "Hey dad, were you gonna tell me that Peter Parker is Spiderman?" 

"No why?" 

"Maybe because I go to school with him, and he's my age," you say sarcastically. 

"Huh, guess he is." Peter walked back out now, this time in jeans with the suit in hand. 

"The suit keeps malfunctioning and Karen keeps speaking German. Can you fix it Mr. Stark?" he asks but your dad's head is in another world. 

"Here I can fix it, come on to my lab." you grab the suit and walk down the hall.

 "You have your own lab?!"

After that day the two of you spent most of your free time working on the suit, or other technology in your wing of the tower. You guys became friends fast, and Peter seemed beyond stoked to share the superhero life with someone besides Ned, your father, and Happy. Your crush went from just a small one where you thought he was cute, to a full-blown one where all you thought of was Peter. Was he hurt? How did his Spanish test go? Did he like how you looked in this dress? etc. One day after he left a study session in your kitchen, Pepper found you daydreaming. 

"You should tell him" she advised. 

"Tell who what?" you inquired. 

"Tell Peter you like him, I think he feels the same way." 

"He doesn't, I don't- we don't like each other. We're just friends." you stutter. Pepper just hummed in disbelief.

Things stayed this way for a few months until one night when he came to your window hurt. 

"Peter, what happened? Are you alright?" 

"Not so much, think you can help me?" he grunted in pain. You tried not to show how worried you were, but seeing him in any kind of pain was hard to do. 

"You should be in the medical bay, let me go get my dad." 

"No, no, NO. You can not get Mr. Stark. He can't know I went out. I promised I'd leave this one alone and if he found out I got hurt, I'd be in so much trouble." If anyone knew what it was like to disobey Tony Stark and have him figure out, it was you. So you went and got a first aid kit. Luckily when you were 15 you took a couple first aid courses after a series of minor injuries in the lab that you didn't want to worry your dad over. It took an hour or two but you fixed him up, and it wasn't anything serious anyway. It was a nice night out so you guys moved out to your balcony with a blanket. He told you the entire story of what happened that night, and somewhere along the line both of you fell asleep in each other's arms.

After that night Peter pulled away. He stopped coming over to study, stopped showing up in your lab to work on projects and avoided you in school. You raked your head for what had happened but came up blank. Thinking he just maybe needed some time apart you gave him two weeks. But after zero contact for those two weeks, you had enough. You decided to corner him at his apartment after school. May answered the door and invited you in, saying you could go to his room where he was. 

You knocked, and heard "Yeah May, come in!" so decided it was okay to go in. 

"Hey." 

"Hey." Since when had things been this awkward between the two of you.

 "I haven't heard from you in a while and thought I'd check up on you. Is everything okay?" you said quietly. 

"Just been busy, sorry." You decided taking the sweet approach wasn't working. 

"You're always busy, but before you made time for me. Why are you avoiding me?!" 

"God Y/N I don't want to avoid you, but maybe it's better we stop hanging out." 

"Bullshit. I am calling bullshit. Tell me what's really going on." 

"I LIKE YOU, okay? I like you and hanging out with me is a bad idea. I get hurt, and you looked so worried a few weeks ago when I came in injured. And it sucks knowing you don't feel the same way." He liked you, Peter liked you. 

"You do know that my dad is Iron Man right? Everyone I know is always hurt, and I'm always worried. Also, who said I don't feel the same way. I have had a crush on you for years." his eyes widened at the last part. 

"You do? I uh- you like me?" He may be a superhero but man was he a dork. 

"Will you kiss me now?" you smiled and he pulled you close to him. He reached up and cupped your face and tentatively met your lips.  

Kissing Peter was by far the best thing you've ever done. At first, he held back, not wanting to hurt you in any way. But after you grabbed his hair something switched. When you pulled away both of you started giggling. 

"You dork." 

"Hey!"

Dating Peter was like a dream. He always made sure to text you good night, take you on dates after his spider duties. (Your favorite dates were the ones where you just sat on top of buildings talking.) It had been four months of you being the happiest you've ever been. But while in the beginning sneaking around was fun, you really hated lying to your dad now. Whenever Pete came by you would have to act like friends, no touching and definitely no kissing. As things became more serious the two of you decided you had to tell your dad. It was all planned out, on Saturday both of you would have dinner with dad and Pepper, and tell him calmly.

The Friday before telling him the tower was empty, which had to have been a first for the place. You and Peter walked in planning to study but instead took the emptiness as a blessing. 

"FRIDAY is anyone but us in the top floors." 

"No Y/N." 

"Where's my dad?" 

"Your father is at a SHIELD meeting across town and not set to be back until 8 pm." It was only 4 pm. 

"Pete, my room?" you said not even waiting for a response. The two of you ran to your room like the teenagers you are.  

While at the beginning of your relationship Peter was nervous about kissing you, now was a completely different story. The minute the two of you made it to your room he had you pressed up against the door with his mouth moving ferociously against yours. You could practically hear your heartbeat thumping out of your chest. One hand of his was pressed against the wall, the other holding your hip. The groan that came out of his mouth when you broke for air sent shivers down your spine. You pulled at his shirt, wanting it off but not having a clear enough mind to convey that to him with words. He got the hint though and threw it across the room before hoisting you up and carrying you to your bed.

You loved Pete for who he was, but the muscles in his chest were just the icing on top. As you kissed your hands mapped every inch of his body. He was all yours. In a moment of bravery, you rolled over so that you could be on top of him, straddling his hips, and removed your top. Not wanting to waste a moment you met his lips again and started to slowly grind on him, releasing little moans of pleasure. The door to your room then swung open suddenly. 

"Hey Y/N, I got out early and was thinking-AHHH" your dad screamed and you tried to cover both you and Peter but the damage was already done. 

"CLOTHES ON, LIVING ROOM NOW," he said walking away. Poor Peter looked as white as a ghost.

Walking into the living room you see your dad sitting on the couch with his head in his hands. Peter is right behind you and your dad calls Pepper on FRIDAY. You awkwardly wait for her to come, but secretly are glad to have an adult on your side. When Pepper enters she looks between you, Peter and your dad before saying 

"I thought we were waiting until tomorrow." You try and motion for her to not finish the sentence but she did. 

"YOU KNEW?" dad yells. "YOU KNEW THEY WERE AND YOU DIDN'T TELL ME. SHE'S MY KID AND HE WAS CORRUPTING HER." 

"Uh Mr. Stark, I didn't do anything she didn't want to. In fact, she was liking it very much." Peter stutters. 

"PETE SHUT UP" you yell. Your face is the color of a tomato and you swear that this is the single most embarrassing moment of your life. Dad points at Peter, then you. 

"I- nope. This isn't going to happen." 

"Tony, this has been happening." Pepper chimes in. 

"How long?" when nobody goes to speak he asks again. "How long!?" 

"4 months" you mumble. 

Then dad looks at Pepper, "How long have you known?" 

"Since before she realized she even liked him," she says smugly. 

"Mr. Stark I-" 

"No, zip it not another word from you. I need a minute" he says. Everyone then goes quiet and all look at your dad. After a minute or so he finally speaks. "Okay, but if I see what I saw again, or I see any sort of prequel to it then I will kill him." You smile and hug Peter. "What did I JUST say?" 

"DAD it was a HUG"

After your dad found out things eventually went back to normal. As normal as they could be at least with having a dad as Iron Man, and a boyfriend as a part spider superhero. Dad and Peter seemed to get over the awkwardness after a few weeks. Although you did have to hear both of them complain about the other more frequently. Being a mediator when they fought over what movie was better was actually physically draining. Maybe this was an unconventional life, but you wouldn't trade it for the world.

[the-second-circle-ffxiv]

Proposition

Asagi looked around in a mess of a room she had just casually walked into through an unlocked door. Somewhere deep down she wished that she, too, could still be that carefree. Silke's small apartment was so full of miscellaneous things, that at the first glance it seemed to be chaotic. However, after watching more closely, despite of the amount of things everything was in surprisingly good order. Opposite the door, on the other side of the living room was obviously her personal fortress: a huge, inviting and soft-looking canopy bed accompanied by a gigantic bookshelf that almost touched the roof. It had been crammed full of books, and even then she hadn't managed to fit them all in there. About half of the tomes were either laying on the floor or had been piled next to the shelf. On the right side of the living room the eye-catcher element was definitely a cluster of a small fireplace and an odd, winged sofa alongside a couple of round armchairs. Asagi was just thinking how her usually somewhat unorganized and clumsy sister had matured so much since starting her mage studies and finally reached some level of elegance. Then her gaze moved into the darkest, farthest corner of the room, where an old cupboard slouched both doors open like a drunkard passed out while still sitting in a chair. Bundles of clothes, cleaning tools and who knows what else were hanging from the drawers crammed so full of stuff they couldn't fully close. Shaking her head, Asagi turned to look on the other, tidier side of the room, where Silke had displayed her greatest treasures. A couple of far eastern drawers were almost bending under the weight of all plush toys and figurines on them. Silke liked to travel, and she had a habit of bringing something cute back home from every place she had visited.

Asagi couldn't help but smile when she noticed a happy looking emerald Carbuncle sitting on a round, red pillow and holding a gold coin almost as big as itself. It was very old, but it still looked almost like new. Back in the days when Asagi and Silke had been kids and lived in Kugane, they had gone to fair with their parents and brother. Some old merchant had noticed Silke's greedy stare and they had told the girl such artifacts brought luck. Asagi wasn't sure did she believe in such or not, but Silke couldn't have cared less. She had thought the creature was pretty colored and cute and that was all that mattered. She decided right then and there she wouldn't leave the fair without it.

However, the money their parents had given for the fair had not been enough for the item. Silke had asked for more without success. A heated debate had followed, which Silke had lost. Gracefully she had dropped on the ground and started screaming like a banshee, attracting too much unwanted attention. Their parents had finally bought the damn thing just to avoid possible Sekiseigumi questions about domestic violence. When Asagi's gaze finally ended up into the last corner of the room, a frustrated exclamation wasn't far. It was Silke's desk. The dummy had piled paperwork on it - judging from the amount since the day she had moved into the apartment - and a candelabrum peeked out from the messy mass. It was purely absurd to keep it in such place, and even more with a shiba inu in the house. Damn creature, Asagi thought in passing, while lifting the candelabrum away from the desk and relocating it on one of the drawers. The little red beast wasn't annoying in the same way most of dogs were, who barked at everything, smelled like animals, shed their fur everywhere and were messy in general. No, Laurence von Salem - though Silke and Lareine called him also Lucy for some reason, had way too much fun with it and Asagi had not the slightest clue why - was like people, except he looked like a dog. Just like a few minutes ago, when Asagi had arrived. Normal dogs would've barked their lungs out, dashed to greet her and dropped all nearby movables with their swooshing tail. But no, Laurence had just lazily gotten up from his spot in the living room next to Silke's bed, slowly padded towards the little hallway like he'd own the place and stared at Asagi for a moment while looking like he had just smelled something bad. Then he had apparently decided Asagi wasn't a threat, since he had silently snorted and continued his way into the kitchen, after which Asagi had heard rippling of water before it had become silent again. He hadn't come back though. It was probably cooler in the kitchen. Bah, enough of recollection, Asagi thought to herself. She took a couple of steps next to the couch where Silke was laying in a half sitting position, facing towards the fireplace and neck bent in such an unnatural way it almost hurt just to look at.

"Hey, sis", Asagi said, poking her sister carefully. "Can I sit down for a while, or are you busy?" Silke flinched and turned to look at Asagi, dazed. Her long, black hair was unkempt and glasses tilted. She was wearing one of her pompous robes, as usual. It was rare to see her in a more casual outfit. The girl just loved robes. "Oh, hi!" Silke exclaimed and glanced around like not being completely sure about her surroundings. "Yeah, by all means", she giggled awkwardly and then added: "I think I just fell asleep." "You should seriously sleep for a change... have you pulled an all-nighter with those books of yours again?" Asagi asked accusingly and took a seat next to Silke, reaching out towards her and gently fixed her glasses. Silke rolled her eyes with dark circles around them. "Not my fault they make books so interesting. And I gotta say I hate schedules. There ain't enough hours in a day for me to do stuff, I swear." She became more serious all of a sudden. "But oh, you got me interested. This must be something very important for you to leave your work and drop by." Her sleepy gaze focused a bit. "Maybe one day you'll find a way to add more hours into your day... as an archmage and all that", Asagi noted smiling, but let her expression quickly fade away. "And well... it's about my work. I do not know who to talk to, but you are all I have so... Silke, what would you say if I told you I have hit a mid-life crisis?" There was a short silence. Silke's eyes widened for a moment while she was staring at Asagi in disbelief. Then she burst out laughing, but soon after noticing Asagi's darkening expression she forced herself to stop and coughed awkwardly. "Eh... what? Why? Wait... Does this have something to do with that new hair color of yours?" It was Asagi's turn to roll her eyes. "Oh, go on and laugh, you silly little gremlin", she snapped playfully. "I mean... I have been thinking. What do I have? The bar... yes. But it's all there is. And honestly: the recent accident with the drunkard made me wonder. Is it all even worth it? Day after day I'm stuck inside those red walls. Seeing the same old faces. Hearing the same dry stories time after time. I have started to see myself as I will be when I grow old: a bitter woman, wiping puke off the table."

Silke listened closely while nodding rapidly. "Hm, well... I don't think other occupations are any more exciting", she pondered, rolling her hair around her finger. "Less risky they may be, but... My professors for example. Their job looks exciting from a student’s point of view, but I've thought of what it's like to them. Same old routine day by day, teaching students at days and fixing paperwork at evenings and nights. I think all regular occupations are like that in the end, after the first charm has worn off. You just gotta pick a career of which routines you like the most." Asagi couldn't do anything but to stare at her for a moment. Silke was usually so cheerful, but this was probably the most depressing thing she had ever said. And it made the whole thing even more depressing, that Asagi thought she was right. "At least you have choices", Asagi notified. "You don't have to become a professor. You can use your knowledge in so many ways. Maybe you can become a seer in a royal court. A mercenary... Maybe a researcher of old. Only the sky is the limit with your talent, Silke. Don't even think about locking yourself into some dusty, old office!" While Silke was frowning, Asagi let out a long sigh. "For me, though... I don't want to say this... but I don't know what to do. Time to time I find myself just thinking about burning the whole shit down." Silke tilted her head, frowning even more. She lifted her feet alongside a pair of moogle slippers from the floor and turned around so that she was facing Asagi completely, sitting cross-legged. "Huh? How are those royal seers or mercenaries any different then?" she started to grill. "They have their own routines as well." She rolled her eyes once again. "Personally I don't have a clue what you're talking about. I've always thought your occupation is interesting. It includes more risks than ordinary duties, but that's about the only thing I don't like about it."

Asagi leaned her back onto the sofa's comfy curve while crossing her legs. "Well, at least days would be different. But I guess you are right", she admitted.

If Silke of all people thought her occupation interesting, it couldn't be too bad after all. All those poor souls depended on her. Sure, most of them were drunkards, but despite of some bad choices of life, deep down they were just ordinary folk. One usually had a very good reason to grab a bottle. Asagi couldn't deny her bar was a peerless way to gather information, both for herself and her customers. She also had her doubts of being on the game for so long it might actually be close to impossible to step out from the shadows without dragging them along with her. "And it's bringing food to the table", Asagi added after a short while. "I'm proud of what I've achieved. But you see... I never see you for example. I miss the old days in Kugane. We used to do a lot together. Now it's just... Bah, look at me being all sentimental! I think I'm finally starting to drop the ball for good." "Now that you mention it, I'd like to see you more often, too", Silke noted, smiling. "But I don't think there's another bar in Foundation area like yours. And no, I'm totally not including Forgotten Knight! Imagine all those poor folk who'd have no longer a place to go and have fun in if you quit. But honestly, if you're feeling bored, what is stopping you from changing careers? What would you rather like to do?" "That... is a good question", Asagi pondered. "Anything connected to magic is off limits. My magic is way too unstable as it is. My blade? Years have made me rusty, and I don't want to risk my life again." "Of course your skills will get rusty if you don't do anything with them for a long time", Silke notified. "If you want to live by the sword again, all you need to is to pick it up and start using it. Geez..." Asagi had been thinking about it herself as well, but she had ended up into a conclusion it was too big of a risk and could lead into another mistake way too easily. And perhaps this time she would lose more than just an eye. "Nah", she said and couldn't help but smile. "I want to make sure I stay alive and see you becoming an archmage. And maybe get married. Then I could be the uptight aunt Asagi." "You?" Silke exclaimed, eyes round with horror. "Married?" She burst out laughing uncontrollably. "As if!"

Asagi blinked, her mouth hanging ajar. Before she was able to regain her voice, Silke suddenly stopped laughing and slowly turned to look at her. "Wait... Does this mean you actually have someone you like?!" "No! What?! No!" Asagi cried out. "I was talking about you anyway!" "Oh." "But speaking of which: why do you find me getting married so impossible of an idea?! You are hurting my soul, sister..." Asagi turned away from her dramatically. Silke puckered up her lips, and the tips of her ears started to droop a bit. "Meh... And here I was getting all excited for you." Then she sighed deeply and looked away. "You should know by now. I'm not interested in relationships, even less getting married. It's too much work and takes too much time. I've had my share of dating partners who've been jealous of my studies or my hobbies, or even magic itself! Relationships feel like someone tying a leash around my neck and tugging me all the time, telling me to stop doing what I love the most and give them attention instead. There's no way I could live like that. Ugh...", she rubbed her temples, eyes squeezed shut. "My brain starts to hurt just by thinking about it. Let's not talk about me." Asagi wasn't sure what she should've said. She found it extremely hard to believe there would've been anyone in the whole world fitting to be her own lifemate. She had also noticed she shared her sister's problem: she wanted a partner who wouldn't make her feel like she was trapped. If such a miracle were to happen, she would - by all means - welcome it. But still she thought the mere chance was low in astronomical proportions. Thus she wanted Silke at least to experience it, but so far it seemed she was following in Asagi's footsteps. She couldn't keep anyone for long, and wasn't even sure did she truly want it. Silke wiped the melancholic expression from her face like a pinch of dust from a table, and in an instant it was replaced by her more familiar, impish grin. "As far as I've watched other people's relationships from afar, there seems to be awfully lots of people who're seeking... ya know... the princess type, who they can protect or something like that. You couldn't be a princess even if your life depended on it, no offense!" Silke started to laugh again. Asagi smirked playfully and reached out to pinch Silke's ear. She let out a surprised squeal and yanked her ear away. "Here I was just teasing you, but you are shooting me with actual poisoned arrows!" Asagi proclaimed. "How dare you? I can be a delicate princess if I want to! Anyway, I guess you are right. I will just keep doing what I do. And maybe try working a bit less and seeing you more. I'm... kind of worried about you anyway." "Worried about me? Why?" Silke repeated, frowning slightly. "I haven't even blown anything up lately. Is that what worries you? If that's the case, it's easily fixed." If it had been something so simple, Asagi certainly wouldn't have had any need to talk about it. She had been postponing this discussion for as long as she had been able to, but lately she had started to feel she should've said something much earlier. "You are spending quite a lot of time time with that experiment girl", Asagi finally stated. "You hardly see people, and when you do, it's that... what does she call herself? Lareine? Don't get me wrong. I'm glad you have found a friend. But you know what I mean." Silke tilted her head again. "Experiment girl?" she repeated, narrowing her eyes. "Yes, her name is Lareine. She happens to be the only person who has enough spare time in her hands to see me when I'm able to go out. And what's even more important: she doesn't annoy me, like most of other people." Asagi let out a drawn-out sigh, looking at the flames dancing in the fireplace. "She's not right in the head. She is an outcome of what that man did to a poor woman. I may see him in different light these days, but I'm afraid this Lareine is just pulling you closer to Blacksoul. You will end up being an experiment as she is." Asagi hadn't been completely honest when she had told Varg she didn't care about the rumors about him. In a way it was true - while no one she knew was involved with the man in any way. However, it was completely another matter when Silke of all people had started to spend her time in such questionable company. Silke made a gesture with her hand like shooing away a fly. "Pff, oh please. This is probably the most ridiculous thing I've heard all week. You're being mean now." Silke obviously tried to keep a brave face on, but Asagi still noticed that strange hue in her sister's eyes she always had when someone had been poking her into the wrong place. "Lareine has been through so much shite it's no wonder it has left its mark", Silke started to speak formally like she'd been addressing an audience. "She's one of those few people who actually like to have me around and who doesn't think I'm crazy. Would you like me to rather hang out with my classmates? The normal ones? The ones who're bored during classes, who badmouth professors behind their back, who call me a nerd because I actually like to study..." Silke's voice was dripping with bitterness. She inhaled deeply and continued: "I've always wanted to ask them why do they even bother going to school if they don't want to be there. It's not even a grade school anymore, it's completely optional! No one is forcing them!" She shook her head, trying to regain at least some of her composure. "About Grumpy, I mean, the old man Varg-Varg... you're just being paranoid, dear sis. He may appear intimidating, sure, but in reality he's just an ordinary dude and totally under Lareine's slipper. He's not interested in me in any way. He probably wouldn't even want me visiting there." When Silke finally stopped talking, she was slightly out of breath. Asagi remained silent for a while, studying her. She certainly hadn't wanted to make her this upset. She wasn't sure did Silke know about it, but few months back Asagi had marched to Varg's door and demanded him to leave Silke alone. Back then Asagi had been certain he had lied when he had said he had no clue what she was talking about and told her to put her sister on a leash or something, so that she wouldn't stray into his house anymore. "...I'm sorry, sis. You are right", Asagi admitted finally. "You're a grown up woman. Just promise me to keep your eyes open, okay?" "Don't I always?" Silke asked, glancing at Asagi, sounding a bit tired. "Every time someone has tried something shady with me, they've ended up burning themselves..." Her eyes unfocused for a moment. She was either thinking very rapidly or wasn't thinking at all. Then she turned to look at Asagi again. "Perhaps you should join me next time I go visit them?" Asagi blinked. "J... join you? To Blacksoul Manor?" she broke into a giggle. "Oh, Varg would love that for sure!" She wasn’t certain was the suggestion either genius or plain stupid. If Varg didn't want either of them around, it would've been best to stay away. But Silke and Lareine were best friends, and Asagi had only heard good things about the butler, Arsene, who seemed to be delighted when he had guests to serve. It couldn't be good for Lareine either to spend her days alone in that grim, old estate. If she was important to Silke, and she wanted to keep her close, Asagi would certainly help her with it. "I may consider", Asagi agreed finally. "Maybe it's good time for me to pull my head out of a wine barrel. I guess I have been so drowned into my work I have not even noticed you growing up... You are hardly the same girl who got in trouble on the streets of Kugane. And what am I? Your mother? Bah... I'm not the one to tell you what to do." Silke shrugged and grinned. "I don't want you to worry, and I want to show you there actually is nothing to worry. What would be a better way than facing your doubts head on? Besides, grandpa Arsene is the best cook I've ever met. His skill may even rival our dad's. You haven't truly lived until you've tasted his stuff." "I guess that's an offer I can't refuse", Asagi giggled. "If someone is competing with dad in cooking, I have to see it with my own eyes. Tell me when you are going over, and I shall find some time. But talking about work...", Asagi got up from the couch and ruffled Silke's already messed up hair. "My shift is about to start. I will see you later, okay? Thanks for listening to my ramblings." Silke yawned and stretched her limbs, but didn't get up. "Haa, I’m glad I was able to be of help. I think I'm gonna try and sleep some more. Keep your eyes open at work as well, sis!" "I will." While walking towards the hallway, Asagi glanced over her shoulder and saw a petite, pale hand waving at her from behind the back rest. Smiling, she turned back towards the door, but then she noticed an eerie silhouette of a shiba inu staring at her in the kitchen doorway. The setting sun created long, sharp rays that cut the view like in far eastern paintings. Laurence was standing there, his back against the window, making himself seem like a black figure basking in an explosion of bright, orange light. What a drama queen, Asagi thought to herself, frowning. Laurence strutted closer to her and looked at her accusingly like she'd been a cheap sausage. "Lucyyy~!" Silke yelled from the living room. "C'mere, boy!" In an instant the arrogant expression disappeared from the dog's face and suddenly he was beaming as happily as the sun itself. His tightly curled tail started to wag rapidly but clumsily as he dashed into the living room so eagerly he was about to slip. Silently, Asagi opened the door and stepped outside. Before closing it, she could still hear Silke babbling at the dog in a high-pitched tone: "Whooza good boy? You are and you know it, don’t ya? Yes, yes~" --- With @lareine-kira​ :3c

[lettingangelsfall]

III [speak of the devil]

If she hadn't been so exhausted from the night before, Canela would have cleaned the death of a mess in the kitchen.

After peering at the monstrosity, she wondered if she were indeed deprived of sleep or just lazy.

Her left eyebrow rose almost leisurely with irritation.

"This doesn't go here." She grumbled, stepping closer to one of her steel pans placed on the counter adjacent to the stove.

Instead of rolling up her sleeves, Canela disrobed. Fully nude, she began washing her kitchen from top to bottom. She hated rolling her sleeves. The bleach would still somehow end up soaking her entire upper body. So Instead of a discolored satin robe, she preferred scarcely wet skin and dry fabric.

It was simple.

And she could simply do it for hours with a smile on her face.

The telephone chimed, interrupting Canela's even flow of cleanly bliss.

She hurried to answer it after tightening her robe. The water from the sink was still running.

Her index finger, matching the color of the telephone wavered slowly across the dial. She wondered if it were the strange man who bought her cocktail dresses or the city calling to let her know her grass needed cutting.

She answered it abruptly with closed eyes, wishing it was neither of the two.

"Rowe Residence, may I assist you with a room?"

Why she answered the phone wasn't a mystery.

"A room?"

"Why, yes." She answered, recognizing the husky voice. "I offer bed and breakfast services."

"I know, sweetheart. I'm not calling for a room unless that's what you want."

She didn't blush. She giggled, making sure he heard.

"What do you want?" She questioned.

"I'm heading to a party at seven o'clock."

"And?"

"I'd like you to join me."

This would make the second time her and him had hit the town together and if it would be anything like the last time, Canela would be better off in the house for the night.

She imagined how cozy she would be with or without him.

However, the sound of being with him sounded a hell of a lot better.

"Seven, yes?"

"...I'll be there on the dot. Hey, wear the dress I got you."

She hated the sound of the telephone ringing.

_______

"Mademoiselle," The burly man pronounced, opening his hand to assist his date as she stepped out of his black Mercedes.

She smiled, peering over the stirring atmosphere. The air was beginning to seep into night time and the women were all the rage. The way they sauntered around with their little waist lines and long heels fascinated Canela. How could they be so poised yet seem so helpless?

Sebastian grinned sensually, gripping her hips as to escort her into the building.

"Embryo," Canela spoke weakly, repeating the words placed across the blue box of a building.

"Sebastian, where did you find this place?"

"I grew up here, honey. Why do you ask?"

"There's something about it. I can't quite put my finger on it." She pondered.

"Do you like it?" He quizzed, hoping she was impressed. As if she didn't have enough reason to be completely enamored by his charm.

"Like it?" Canela asked with a gloved finger covering her red lips.

Before she could answer, she was encapsulated by the ring of excitement shifting the dim lit ballroom.

Suddenly, the raucous blow of a horn grabbed her and asked her to dance. There were show girls of every kind brushing their tails and bussoms up against her, sporting bunny ears and white bustiers. Money was being thrown every which way. Bottles were bursting louder than the bang of the jazz and cups were poured for the best of the actresses in America. Marilyn Monroe gave her a wink before toasting with her associates.

"Love the dress," She heard from a woman passing by who looked a lot like Audrey Hepburn.

She was shocked that people cared more about what color her dress was than the color of her skin. Women of every race, color, and creed had decided to step out that night with the finest men on their arms and Canela was enthralled to be apart of the crowd.

She had never seen a place like it. It was most certainly nothing like the juke joint.

Canela felt the gruffness of Sebastian's palm on her exposed back.

"How about this seat, darling." He winked.

"For sure," She smiled, taking a seat in a round pink sofa surrounding a white marble table.

They were handed a menu and a cocktail by one of the bunny clad girls. Canela observed Sebastian carefully as the hostess laid their coasters in front of them.

"He's trying so hard not to look,"  Canela laughed to herself. "But he just can't help it. A man is only addicted to a woman."

Before they could surf the flimsy little menu, an older couple entered the room soon sitting across from them on the pink sofa.

"Oh, what a beautiful couple," The lady struck. "Aren't they, Thomas?"

"Are you all married?" Thomas asked.

Canela quickly drew her left hand close to her lap, shuddering at the thought.

"Soon to be..." Said Sebastian, taking a long sip of his cocktail.

"Ladies and gentlemen," The host boomed before Canela could say anything in response. "I sure hope you all are having a good time tonight. We've got a great show for you's..."

Canela's eyes shifted towards her date. His handsome jaws situated perfectly to her. The way his eyes creased when he smiled nearly made her flood the entire room. If she were a dam, everyone would have drowned that night.

It was almost as if he knew she were watching, the way his little dimple danced across his cheeks.

He licked his lips slowly after taking another swig of his drink, when Canela noticed something more absurd than the tails on the rear-ends of the show girls.

Canela's hand bound to her lips.

"A ring!" She gasped.

Sebastian's head cut quickly towards Canela.

"What's that, darling?" He said, folding his left hand in his lap.

"Give it up for our sweetheart, our madly insatiable, and our playful little elf, Regina Combs!"

The crowd roared with applause, making it impossible for Canela to repeat her shocking discovery. The amount of time it took for the crowd to die down gave Canela enough time to contemplate whether she should bring it up anymore. Instead she only smiled, stealing a sip of Sebastian's drink.

His dimple danced once more before Canela cuddled closer to him, watching the show and making a mental note to watch him as well.

She would be sure to keep an eye on him for the rest of the night and the rest of her time knowing him. Regardless of how she felt about the way his jaw made love to his face.

Never would she bring up the ring unless he told her about it. And she was sure he would come around eventually. Even if she had to make him.

A man is only addicted to a woman.

"It was fascination, I know. And it might have ended right there at the start..."

Regina Combs had a stage presence of milk and honey with a dash of rose petals. Her eyes really knew how to enthrall a man but somehow control his wife's suspicion. All the while, she was broadcasted on television as America's sweetheart and an inspiration to young girls. Little did they know what their fathers thought of Miss. Regina when they weren't around.

"Seeing you alone in the moonlight above..."

"Honey," Sebastian whispered in her ear, causing her to jump. "I didn't mean to scare you."

"It's quite alright," Canela smiled, never taking her eyes off of the stage. "What a beautiful dress."

"I wanted to...alter the condition a bit."

"The condition? What condition?"

"The condition we made a deal about. I would help you get more people to come to your hotel."

"Bed and Breakfast." She corrected, eyes glued on Regina. "How does she get her hair to stay like that? I just have to know."

"Marry me, Canela."

The words bellowed in the drums of her ears. The way he said it formed a knit between her eyebrows.

"How could you just demand something like that?" She raged quietly.

"Babydoll, I'm sorry. I-"

"Take me home. This instant!"

_______

"I'll call you," Sebastian called, before his voice was cut off from the slam of his car door.

Canela stomped across the pavement, carefully lifting her white shawl meters from the ground so she wouldn't trip and fall. She noticed how Sebastian sped off once she got to her door. As she fumbled around in her purse for the key, she noticed the light was still on in the gas station across the street.

Canela by no means had twenty-twenty vision. However, anyone could see that someone was in the window of that station. Canela wondered who would be looking out the window at this hour. The very thought of it gave her an uneasy chill, as she hurriedly squeezed into the house.

Closing the door behind her, she collapsed slowly onto the floor in a puddle of tears, heels, and her expensive shawl.

"Oh, I hate it here," She cried, taking the cumbrous pins out of her hair.

As she sat there sulking, she began to reminisce about the past.

All the lovers she'd ever known were few and far between.

His name was Andrew, but everyone called him Bleu. He was as dark as night with a soul brighter than the sun. She remembered spending mornings with him in the spring and nights with him in the summer. He would sing to her any song she wanted to hear, picking from his plethora of negro spiritual hymns. That was all he knew, since his mama made him go to church every Sunday.

She was his Sunday and he was her entire weekend.

"I love you, honey." He used to say.

Of course, this was before the war. She remembered the day of the draft. It was raining cats and dogs and she couldn't go outside. She couldn't lie to mother and say she was going to pick flowers.

He wrote her a letter and that was that.

Sunday was over.

Canela picked herself up, making herself a glass wine aged from 1907.

She sauntered around the living room, wishing a tune would accompany her drunken waltz. After turning on the record player, she finally had a dance partner.

"Wonder when my baby's comin' home..." She sang, swiping her makeup off with her bare hands.

"He doesn't love me!" She cried. "He only wants me because of my looks. That's all they ever want. Besides, he's married for CHRIST'S SAKE!"

With that, Canela catapulted the glass of wine towards the wall in front of her, sending it into thousands of tiny pieces of glass.

As Canela cried, the front doorbell rang accompanied by a few quick knocks. It was obviously a woman.

Canela quickly got ahold of herself, tying her hair into the tightest knot one could ever tie.

"Coming!" She pronounced, fixing her dress and makeup.

Taking a deep breath, she opened the door.

"Hello, welcome to Canela's Bed and Break-"

What occupied the other end of the threshold sent Canela into an underlying fright.

Is it really her? Why, it couldn't be?

The diamonds, the dress, and the pearls could only belong to one woman.

"Well," The woman demanded. "Are you gonna let me in or just stand there? You've probably seen me on television...

I'm Regina Combs."

[roseate7]

A team with a core of superstars should feel like a boon on top of a roster of well-paid solid talent. But in the Pens' superstars' post-thirty years, that's not feeling like the case. It feels like a confused team yo-yoing through highs and lows who have superstars that are keeping the whole thing afloat. I don't think this is a problem with the superstars or with the rest of the team. I think it's that management and coaching aren't even aware of this situation, or at least are not acknowledging it.

As Brass' exit interview proved, and as everyone but "why can't everyone see I'm amazing" Sprong agrees, there's no toxic culture in the Pens locker room. It's not as boisterous as some teams but it's also not cliquey and there are no rules about personal habits beyond guys needing to keep language and behavior somewhat clean considering how often children visit the Pens facilities. Social media is often a bit more stifled than most teams for much the same reason. But you see lots of mingling of new and older guys on the job and in their social lives. New boys get invited to dinners and parties no problem. Sid’s known for not being a yelling captain or a buddy-buddy captain, he’s a listener and a teacher and he’s open almost 24/7. Geno is honest as the day is long and a much needed balance in leadership with Sid. It’s a solid system up top and if you’re a guy who wants to work hard then there’s a place for you waiting among the team. For all that GMJR plays musical chairs with his trades, the team itself wants to bring these guys into the fold and love them.

Which I often wonder if that's part of the problem. Is it better to have a rowdier boys-club locker room where everyone loves their job but there's a healthy balance emotionally between giving your all at work and going home to get away from it, than your team being your second family and the head and heart of it all are two generational superstars who've gotten used to an uncomfortable amount of scrutiny and pressure?

Sid and Geno have faced absurd pressure and media interest since their teens (and from childhood in Sid’s case)  as well as a heightened level of expectation and criticism. The bar was set ridiculously high from the start and yeah they’ve gotten used to it. But while they have been able to handle and keep up with all of that, when you combine it with the talent of the Pens’ Cup-winning core - there's just no escaping how much higher expectations are when you show up to work there.

Especially considering the history GMJR in particular has of bringing in players currently in rough patches and wanting to rehabilitate them. It's gotta be weird being that guy who was a healthy scratch for much of his latter days at his old team and then suddenly you're grabbing a gatorade next to Kris Letang and Patric Hornqvist is trying to kiss you.

Then you see Sid and Geno walking around the halls of a venue they built. They're not even the types of hockey idols who are goofballs. Geno has a great sense of humor and shows his love by chirping, but the weight on his shoulders is palpable. The guy has long shadows in his past and in what's still expected of him, to say nothing of his fraught relationship with the league. Sid especially is so swamped with media responsibility and visiting groups from charities, schools, interviews and meetings that there's never really a sense of being "off". I don't know that that disconnect from normal guy reality ever really goes away when your captain grew up having to watch his every single word and gesture, even in casual moments, because everyone is waiting to catch him out at being human and flawed.

Like, hockey players are heavily flawed by nature. They're overgrown boys given way too much money too early and their lives have had the privilege of revolving around a sport that eats up almost their entire lives. They're socially more like figure skaters or ballet dancers than contact sports athletes because of how much their existence has to revolve around their work. But the balance for that is usually being rowdy, being excessive, and finding women who will put in the work to cultivate a home and family for them.

Sid has more than once gotten a bit of a nudge or a side-eye for not performing the usual post mid-twenties to early-thirties settling down ritual. While I absolutely respect him for being smart enough to keep his personal identity limited to himself for so long, it's plain to see that this aberration is viewed by at least a portion of the hockey world as a destabilizing one. For all that that is backward as hell, it's a real issue if enough guys buy into it. It's clearly not going to peer pressure him into making that kind of commitment, but it's a consideration for the subject of this drawn out ass post.

To bring it all back around: it's not going too far to say that Sid absolutely views his team and his franchise as his second family. Hockey itself has been his childhood best friend and I don't think anyone is in any doubt that the degree to which he's emotionally woven his life into hockey is a good old little bit too much. He's got a LOT of friends scattered across the world and a big ol' family, but Pittsburgh considers him "their Sid" because they're the family who get him the most out of the year. It's much the same for Geno whose Russian bleeding heart has cultivated a Pittsburgh-centric American identity for himself. They gave themselves permanently to this club and the club in turn has declared them as their own until their retirement. They've already achieved a legacy that most NHLers consider out of their reach. They're warm and kind people, but they're also walking that bit apart from everyone else. It's just how things have worked out for this particular dynasty. Most clubs have one superstar who navigates a way to stay integrated with the team (or not, in some cases) or the rare instance like 90s Detroit where the majority of the roster is made up of superstars. But it’s what makes the Crosby and Malkin dynasty so unusual in modern hockey: the arrival of the salary cap era put an end to one team hoarding generational talents. Having a Crosby and a Malkin who agree to huge discounts in pay and tally their income close to each other is, well it’s just fuckin’ unheard of. Likely never going to happen again, to be honest and I don’t blame other superstars at all for not following that pattern.  

So I just wonder if that comfort of knowing you have these two leaders and this stellar Cup-winning core changes the mentality for the rest of the players, regardless of their own talent. And if there is something inherently difficult for a player who walks into a franchise where every turn reminds you that your team is expected by the league, by the media and by the fans to perform and behave at a certain standard or else it's considered abject failure. The reaction is intense and harsh.

It's why I want coaches and management to start imagining a team with their core stars taken out and figure out how to get the other guys to gel together and strategize in a way that will exist on top of the core's ability to ride in and save the day. Examine how, when young players throughout the league play with the Pens core on national and ASG teams, they say that it's almost absurd how easy their job becomes. Maybe that's a hint that the guys outside the core can't figure out how to get their teeth back into their play when they're practising with guys who can generate chances every single time. Maybe the motivation isn't there if they can't find a place where they're needed. 

Maybe there actually does need to be some cliquey-ness to the locker room so that the guys outside the core can train and practise on a level that they feel the urgency again.

Maybe no matter how nice the busy superstars are to you and how much they wanna just be one the guys, sometimes they just can't. The separation is out of their control. And that other players want to huddle up with guys who face the same challenges in their play but who aren't staying hours after a game to talk to media and meet hoardes of fans or having to change dinner plans so no one can see who they're out with.

Idk it's a thing to think about.  

(I know it’s pretentious as fuck to link to myself but it’s for reference I promise)