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mydrug-is-dragonage · 4 years ago

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Dar Atishan, A Talk with Cole

“Wind and whispers, dreams and demons, ‘why don’t they ever want me enough to want me?’” My ears perked up and I saw Cole walking towards me on the battlements. I glanced at him and returned, hunched over and brooding, watching the snow blow of the tops of mountains. “You’re hurt and hurting, all three of you wounded, worried, ‘was it the right decision?’”

I turn around and face him, smirking. “Do they have love in the Fade?”

“‘Hahren Morriel warned me, the shemlen are fickle, but the elf too?’ Wanting, wondering, ‘what else could I do?’” I sighed and patted the battlements. I pushed myself up with my hands and he joined me, legs dangling over the edge. “You’re sad.”

“I am.”

“They think it was the right decision.”

“I know.”

“But they’re sad, too. Brooding, breaking, ‘Bull said it’d help me with the ladies, but it’d break her.’” He looked towards the barn. I sighed and looked up towards the sky, clear and full of stars. “Dust, danger, delightful, distraction, ‘if she’s real, what if they’re all real, too?’”

I shake my head. “Cole, stop.”

“I want to help,” he says. He looks up, his shaggy hair nearly hiding his big eyes. I put a hand on his knee.

“I don’t think you get to help,” I said.

“Why?” He asks, his voice full of genuine curiosity.

“Can I tell you a story?”

“Sixteen, sweating, ‘Will we make it?’”

“Yes, that story. Stay out of my head, let me tell you, not show you.” He nods and puts his hand in his lap. “When I was sixteen, my vallaslin fresh, my sword sharpened, I went on a hunt with a boy.”

“Tallen.”

“Yes, Tallen. Tallen was a few years older than me, an accomplished hunter. We’d been out in the forest for a few days. He was certain he’d found some clues that would lead to some ancient artifact, something Keeper Istimaethoriel could make use of. Remind of us of the old ways.” I looked towards Cole, his gaze stuck on the lines arching across my face. “So we looked. We looked and looked and looked. Days passed, and we couldn’t seem to find whatever his sources had led him to.”

“Boredom, bothered, ‘This is worse than when the aravel breaks,’” he said. “Sorry. I’ll try to stay outside.”

“Thank you, Cole. Yes, I was bored and angry. I’d only agreed to come along because of Tallen. None of the other hunters thought it was worth our time. The Keeper wasn’t especially keen. But Tallen,” I said. I trailed off, taken back to the forest, a girl with fresh ink, so sure of what I’d chosen, Elgarnan’s markings across my face.

“But Tallen?”

“Right, but Tallen wanted to go, and I wanted to help, and I wanted to spend time with him, alone,” I said. I looked at Cole and raised an eyebrow. His face stayed as placid as ever. “So we wandered. We looked. We found nothing. One night, deep in the forest, we found a cave to sleep in. We’d build a small fire, roasted a bird we’d killed. We sat, quietly listening to the forest.” I looked up at the sky again, constellations dancing around. I heard the Hahren speaking about the legends, the Elven gods, the Dread Wolf.

“As we finished dinner, I heard stirring from the back of the cave. I didn’t have time to fully put on my armor, but I grabbed my chest plate and my blade, I got Tallen’s attention and pointed towards the darkness beyond us. He grabbed his bow, and started to draw an arrow. Before he could get a good shot lined up, darkspawn came running towards us,” I said. Cole closed his eyes. “I’d never seen one up close. I’d heard stories growing up, of course. We’d avoided the Blight, but everyone knew of them, their corruption. I got a few good swings, killed one right away. Tallen had time to back up, start taking shots at different ones as they approached me.”

“You were afraid,” he said.

“I was. I was so young, this was my first real mission.”

“You lived.”

“Or maybe I’m a spirit, too, drawn to the dying elf.”

“Jokes and jaunting, ‘laughter makes it easier,’” he said.

“Does it bother you?”

“No, you still like me. You see me all the time,” he said.

“I thought that was your decision.”

“I did, too. Go on. I like the way your voice carries the past,” he said.

“The darkspawn kept coming and coming. Soon enough I realized they were too many to fight, the two of us. Tallen called out to me, I gave him a clear shot and we ran from the cave. We ran and ran and ran until our legs were going to give out. The darkspawn never let up.. We reached a cliff. The darkspawn were maybe four hundred feet away, running towards us as they had, corrupting everything in their path. Tallen looked over the edge, then back at me. He grabbed my face and kissed me.”

“First, frolicking, filthy, ‘I’d hoped I’d be clean.’ You’d wanted to kiss him?”

I laughed. “For a long time. Tallen was so handsome, so strong and brave. He’d be a good partner, he was a good man. I’d only come along so he’d be forced to see me as a woman instead of the child I’d been.”

“Did it work?”

“You don’t kiss children like that,” I said. “When we pulled apart, he said, ‘trust me’ and put out a hand. I put mine in his, and we jumped over the edge.”

“Maybe you are a spirit,” he said.

“I was lucky,” I laughed. “We landed in a lake, deep enough that we didn’t break any bones. The water helped wash away the darkspawn blood. When I came up for air, I looked around, gasping. I saw Tallen, swam over towards him, put my arms around him, and kissed him again, how I’d wanted to.”

“He tasted like fire and lake water,” he said.

I nodded. “We stood in the water for a time, embracing. Then we found our way to the shore. The darkspawn didn’t follow, so we made another small fire and slept for the night. The next morning, when I woke up he was gone. I panicked, put on my chest plate and went searching for him. I saw him on a far hill, picking flowers. Cole, in that moment I could have died.”

“But you wanted the flowers?”

“Good die, not bad die.”

“There’s different kinds of dying?” Cole asked.

“I settled back into camp, and he returned. Together we made our way back to the clan. When we arrived, Keeper Istimaethoriel came up and gave us a hug. The Keeper’s daughter, Asharell came up too and put her arms around Tallen. He reached in his pack and gave her the flowers.”

“You wanted to die then, too. Good die?”

“Bad die,” I said. “My heart broke into a thousand little pieces. We’d kissed, we’d survived darkspawn, and he picked flowers for the pretty girl back home instead of me.” I stopped and swallowed. The night air on the battlements had begun to chill, and goose bumps rose on my arms. “After we’d had a proper bath and a proper meal, I wandered near the halla. Tallen came up to me.”

“Kissing, killing, crying, chilling ‘No hard feelings?’ Oh. He was an ass.” I laughed and patted him on the back.

“Yes, he was. Apparently he’d long been sweet on Asharell and wanted to go on this expedition to impress the Keeper so he could marry his daughter. Our daring tale and the flowers had certainly done their part,” I said. “He came up to me and said, ‘I hope we can keep it a secret. It was the moment, fear of death and all that.’ I nodded, said it was fine. He was afraid he’d die. I was there. People have made worse choices under fear.”

“You carry this hurt like a scar,” he said. “But now, it cracks upon, and it’s hurting all the same.”

“When Solas and I kissed in the Fade, I was so excited. I hadn’t done anything like that in a long time,” I said. “But when we woke up, he said it was a bad decision, a mistake. So I let him go.” I put my hands on my knees and took a deep breath. “Then Blackwall and I, traveling, laughing. It came so suddenly, I thought the Creators had given me a second chance. We went and found his badge, we sat by the fire light.” “But he also said it was wrong,” Cole said.

“After Tallen and Asharell married, I spoke to the Hahren. I needed some advice. He told me, his years of wisdom, ‘You cannot beg anyone to love you.’”

“So when they said no, you believed them.”

“I’m not going to convince them otherwise. If they don’t want me enough to want me honestly, I won’t fight for it,” I said. My eyes welled up and Cole put his hand on mine.

“They could have been convinced,” he said, “but that wouldn’t have been right. It would have hurt you more than losing them.”

I wiped my eyes with my sleeve. “I think maybe love just isn’t for me. Before I wasn’t anyone, now I’m so much more than myself.”

“Willfull, wanting, given, gotten, ‘I’ve given up so much, maybe she could be for me, maybe this woman I could keep,’” he said.

“That’s not how I feel.”

“That isn’t you,” he said. I sat up straighter and looked at him. His eyes glanced down, Cullen leaning over the battlements, his own late night stroll.

“Josephine?” I asked. He shook his head. “Cassandra?” He shook his head again.

“Lost and longing, lyrium-sick, ‘She’s so powerful, so strong, how could she ever want anyone like me?’” Cole looked back at me.

I swallow and look at him, his hands running through his hair. “I never thought, I mean, I’d flirted, but he seemed so closed off. I assumed,” I trailed off.

“‘What if the lyrium takes me? What if I’m not strong enough? She deserves someone strong enough to carry her burdens. She deserves someone without the weight I carry.’”

“Thank you, Cole. This helped.” We hopped off the edge and I gave him another pat on the shoulder.

“Thank you. I’m happy I helped.”

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writinginmygravern · 4 years ago

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Cannibalism (Ticci Toby x Reader)

So this is my first shortfic on this blog so please bare with me as I usually don't write fanfiction on my phone and I won't be able to break the text so I apologize for that in advance. Also, this oneshot contains some graphic stuff and isn't meant to be all cutesy.

T.W.'s: Mentions of blood,kinda gore-ish, starvation, kidnapping, cannibalism, and manipulation.

You sat in a dark and lock closet arms and legs chained to a short, metal post much like a dog who was left outside without any food or water for days from its absent master. Your stomach gargled and howled at you begging for anything to satisfy the emptiness that has been growing from these past three days as well as your tongue feeling like it could sand down drywall as the lack of water was taking its toll as well. Heavy boots could be heard time to time - but hardly walk into the room with said closet you were in - either walking into the room next to yours to grab whatever he planned on taking or in the kitchen with the fridge opening and closing before he left once again. But today those heavy stomps from his work boots echoed into your room as he whistled and mumbled a tune that was familiar to your childhood.

"You are my sunshine, my only sunshine

You make me happy when skies are gray

You'll never know dear, how much I love you

Please don't take my sunshine away."

The closet door slid open to reveal him with his curly, messy, and greasy brunette hair and his ember eyes staring down at you with the corners crinkling as if you were the highlight of his day. His hand held a bowl that had held the same meal he has fed you for the past couple of months and was most likely laced with something to knock you out once again so he could "take care of you". Toby set the porcelain bowl in front of you before cheerfully stating, "Time to eat, (Y/N)!" The stench of iron and raw meat hit your nose as you looked down and felt as though you might vomit - that is if you had anything to chuck up. Even though this wasn't the first time he has fed you human meat you still had the same reaction each time he tried to force it down your throat and made you watch him take a few bites out of it too.

"Toby... Please... No... I don't want too," your voice was too weak to properly plead for him to reconsider your meal and find you something else. Toby's smile soon fell and became an emotionless, blank stare then finally into a angry frown. "After all tha-that hard work ju-just to get a sp-special meal for my dar-darling... You're g-g-gonna tell me no," Toby harshly spat as he grinded his teeth and struggled to get his sentence out as his head violently snapped and turned due to his tics while his fists kept clamping and unclamping out of anger. His mood doing a full one-eighty startled you, causing you to start shaking and covering your face with your arms out of fear of him hurting you. Realizing what he did Toby reached out to you and held you're frail and boney body closely to him as his mood twisted into a sadden state of regret for scaring you like that.

"No, n-no, no... P-p-please I'm sorry, d-don't cry, (Y/N)... I-I wouldn't ever h-hurt you," Toby's tics became more rapid in shoulders as they shrugged and rolled and his words chopped up by his tongue clicking on the roof of his mouth. You stayed still, not hugging the brunette back because of your restraints. Uncontrolled sobbing soon could be heard next to your ear as Toby clinged on tighter, practicality squishing you death with a bone crushing hug making think if he let you go he would feel like you would disappear right in front of him. Not to soon after the boy let go of you and grabbed a slice of meat from the bowl next to the two of you, yanked your jaw down much to your disliking, and shoved the piece into your mouth a quickly as possible before demanding you chew or else there will be consequences if his orders were disobeyed. Without much choice you forcely swolled the wretched thing while also fighting back for it to come back up.

"Good! N-now you have to finish the r-rest my dear," voice laced with glee, Toby waited for you to open your mouth without his help this time to finish the rest of the bowl.

In your head you plead for help to hopefully be saved from this horrible man one day.

I know this one wasn't the greatest since my English sucks but yay for posting my first thing on this blog I guess (?)

#Toby Erin Rodgers #Gore #X Reader #I know he isn't a creepypasta so not tagging him as one #Came up with this at like 1 in the morning #Cannibalistic Toby #Oneshot(?)#Also my english sucks

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judecak · 5 years ago

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Maiko Fluff Week - Day 3

@idonthatemaiko

She ate her dorayaki while she watched the brothers discuss, as usual. Ty Lee finished her tea and she offered to serve her more. Ty Lee smiled at her and gave her the plate full of *kabocha mochi. She denied with her head, she hadn't finished yet.

Princess Ursa took the scroll off the hands of Azula, she got angry and stomped her feet.

"We don't want Love Among the Dragons" she declared sitting next to her.

Ty Lee denied with her head.

"I don't want *The Valley of the Lost Flowers" the prince crossed his arms and pouted. She liked that story, not boring battles neither insufferable romance.

"You're afraid Koh will appear with this weather?" Azula got near him and moved her fingers as claws.

Abundant raining started to fall in the afternoon, they had taken a meal and played two rounds of *Uta Garuta, however the rain had not stopped. The Prince had suggested to read a story meanwhile they waited.

"No" He decided to sat next to Ty Lee. "Why not *Momotaro?"

"We don't want to see you stab the air." Azula replied, taking some dango from the plate. "But if you want to act the *dance of the tigermonkey and the swansparrow, at least we will laugh."

She smiled behind her cup of tea as her mother had taught her. The Prince got angry as usual.

"I can dance with you" Ty Lee piped, making the Prince go red.

"You will do a great tigermonkey dance."

"You want to play a story then." Princess Ursa smiled and she felt sick immediately, she didn't want to. "Very well but to be fair it'll be one none of you have never heard before." She picked another scroll, sat in the corner of the room and started reading.

Long ago, before the Fire Nation even had its name, a beautiful girl was born from noble parents. She was so admired by the humans that even the spirits got curious and they came to visit her, finding her beautiful too, for her pure hearth. She always was kind to all the creatures and talked to everybody, even though her parents had warned her about the evil of the world.

Ty Lee volunteered to start, neither Azula or she complained. Strangely enough, of the three Ty Lee was the one who liked to act as a nice girl. Well she was a nice girl, odd but nice.

She didn’t had an inch of evilness in her hearth and she thought that kindness was those poor spirits needed. It’s one of those spirits she used to talk that felt madly in love with her, of course being an evil and corrupted spirit he didn’t know much of love, just obsession. And he thought of a plan to always being with her.

Azula annoyed the prince to act as the evil spirit, Mai volunteered, it's boring looking those two argue endlessly and she better be an evil being than a boring idiot girl.

In a full moon night, she woke up restless. As many nights she went to the pond to drink water, her mother had warned her many times, but she loved to go and watch the dancing fishes in the pond. That night the fishes were gone, just the purest white lilies glowed. They were so beautiful that she wished to have one of them and so she got into the lake. The blood came from her, the lilies had vines and thorns, tarnishing the water and the lilies.

The prince made a moon with his bending and almost burned her hair, again. Azula mocked him and he dared her to make the fishes. She felt confident but she couldn't, the prince laughed while he presented a nice flower to Ty Lee. The princess got angry and Princess Ursa had to stop the reading. After a few minutes, Mai gave her role as the evil spirit and let Azula have it.

"You have dared to soil my magical pond." He told her making the white lilies die.

She cried and promise him to do whatever was needed to brought the white lilies back. And so he cheated her into giving herself to him. When she realized the trick he had already transformed her into a brownish ugly bird, whose legs were small very difficult for her to run and couldn't flight. She now belonged to him. His power was stronger in the night and when the moon was full bright, but in the days he sleep and he did it more profoundly when there was no moon in the sky. In those weak days, he always stayed in places where the freshwater ruled, so she couldn't escape easily from him.

Ty Lee failed to represent a sad girl and she neither seemed upset to follow Azula wherever she wanted in the room. The prince served her tea and she did the same to him.

She spend her days crying, but her cries just scared the humans and animals alike. However one day a stranger was passing by, attracted by the strange sound. He disliked the ugly bird but he felt its sadness and he took it out of the odorous swap. She was confused by the stranger but she was being taken away from the clutches of the evil spirit so she kept quite. At the same time she was afraid that when the evil spirit didn't found her, he will got mad at the poor stranger.

The prince acted his part while eating his dango, Ty Lee picked some kabocha mochi. Both looked ridiculous but happy in a sense.

The men took her too far away from the water in a beautiful castle, made of rock, sand and beautiful trees. It was the castle of a powerful Lord loved by all his people for his fair hearth. He leaved her in a fountain, surrounded by sacred fire, because he was a faithful man of Agni.

Azula sat next to her, finishing her second dango "His room is a mess, he can't even kept his socks in the correct drawer, imagine what he will do with a Palace."

She smiled. Her mother was obsessed with cleaning and order, everything in her house had a place. Her clothes were lined by color then size. She never cared where she leaved her clothes but the servants hurry to had everything in order.

"Terrible isn't?" The Princess looked at her.

"Disgusting" She answered and both smirked.

Water from fountain is different than water from the pond, there were no flowers, no fishes or animals to share her sadness, just solid rock. Besides with the spirit away from her, his spell was weakening and some days she could regain her human form. But she kept hiding, sometimes as the ugly bird, sometimes as a dirty maid of the kitchen.

The Prince sat near his mother, who cared his head, he smiled. Ty Lee pretended to be a turtleduck in a pond. And later pretended to be a servant. Azula and her agreed she was not good at neither.

In the meanwhile the evil spirit had become furious for losing her. He had been plotting to enter the sacred place, but it is difficult to trespass sacred ground. Envy and evil plots always surround the great monarchs and so he found men willing to dishonor holy land. And so the war started, the Noble Lord fought bravely for his people and his Kingdome.

Azula drag her to become her ally to fight the Prince, she just stood around them, they liked to fight and she didn't like to mess into their drama.

One day, the Noble Lord got injured by a man possessed by the evil spirit, when she saw the injure she knew immediately who was behind all this madness.

Princess Ursa had to intervene again, both siblings had engaged in a fighting with the sticks of their remains of the dango, and that ended with the Prince being poke in the stomach and Azula just said "He's suppose to have an injury!" Princess Ursa narrowed her eyes, she never believed Azula.

She decided that it's enough of them playing the same roles. She offered Ty Lee the role as the Evil Spirit but she didn't dare, however she happily agree to let Mai be the boring heroine, and she became the follower. Azula offered to be the Noble Lord but the Princess didn't allow it, she argue it's unfair to Mai and Ty Lee. However Ty Lee replied that she was happy to be Azula's follower for a while. No one asked Mai if she was happy.

She had faith in the healers of the Kingdome but when he came back with more injures and they got no cure, she started to give him the right medicine. It's not easy to prepare, neither to get it, because it implied to get the scales of the vipersalamander and grind them, but she didn't mind to hurt herself in order to save the Noble Lord.

She didn't pretend the pain, she hated the role. Still she was praised by Ty Lee. The Prince was taking tea, while touching a part of his stomach, she guessed the part Azula had poked him.

He got better, he went back to battle and got injured again. Sometimes she could act quickly for it was new moon, but some days it's full moon and she spend more time as the ugly bird.

She didn't know how to be a turtleduck, but play the fool was pretty accurate in her opinion.

One day the injuries were so bad that everybody feared he wasn't going to survive, she spent as much time as she could at his side and caught more vipersalamander than usual. Her hands blistered and bleed but she kept working to save him, she was so tired that she drowsed near his bed. And so he found her, even thought he was still feverish, he finally found his savior.

He had bits of kabocha mochi in his lips and fingers. Still he gave her a smile and she thought that maybe she had bits of dorayaki too.

She got scare but he calmed her. He wanted to know how she found the cure to his injuries and why she hurt herself in order to save him. And so she told him the truth, she kowtowed three times for the evil she had brought but he told her: "I rather die saving the most beautiful woman in the world, than all the riches in it." He promised her to free her from the evil spirit and marry her. She promise to be the most faithful wife.

Both made a disgusting face for the whole part, it's ridiculous, stupid and absurd. No Fire Lord in the history ever leave the throne for a woman, they have fought viciously to sat there, even the good ones. The Fire Ladies had done almost the same, she didn't remember a single one who had not poisoned, plotted and murdered in all her life. A good daughter made a marriage for honor and status, her mother had taught her that.

He spoke with the Fire Sage to free her. He was suspicious and rendered as unfaithful and follower of dark paths. How come she could bare the pain of catching the hot animals and grind the hard scales. How come such a pure soul could bare so much dead and blood. The Noble Lord spoke wonderful words of her, the Fire Sage then said that if she had salvation only could have be achieved by the purest of love, once the Evil Spirit died. And so the Noble Lord promise eternal love only to her.

The Fire Sages were a joke, no one will ask advice from them, except some countryside people who still believed in spirits and that old things. Not even the Avatar existed anymore.

He prepared for the last battle and she gave to him a Dou she had made with vipersalamander scales. One he used it with pride.

And so he went to free his love from the curse, he went directly to the Evil Spirit calling it by its name. The battle was cruel and long, thousands die that day. The Evil Spirit became afraid when he noticed that this time he couldn't hurt the man and became enrage when he realized what his precious bird had done. He realized too, what was supposed to happen.

She didn't gave him anything, he was very happy to go fighting with a serious look and crumbles of the doriyaki he had being eating. The brothers fought each other happily, just this time without the sticks of the dango. Ty Lee cheered for Azula and tried to made her cheer for the Prince.

"That's not in the story" she grumbled.

The Noble Lord fought bravely with all his might, to put an end to the curse. Both knew that one of them was suppose to die. And with the end of the day, the Noble Lord took his most defiant chance, throwing his most powerful attack to the possessed men and so the flames burned the body.

Azula rolled her eyes and complained that the battle had been stupid, nothing extraordinary like an Agni Kai. Hence the story was unworthy in her opinion. She stuffed herself with kabuchi mochis.

He was took by his surviving men to his Castle to celebrate, but what he really was anticipating was the welcome of his soon to be bride. In the town the festiveness could be felt, despite the tragedy, they have won over the evilness. The door of the Castle were opened to the whole town. And soon she found him, she was dress in a beautiful silk hanfu, like her status should be and not the usual one made of ramie.

They didn't pay too much attention to the victorious prince who walked with a puffed chess, even thought he was supposed to be injured. But Mai liked the way his hair swung behind him, it made her remember the colorful pigeonquetzals long ago her mother had in the garden.

Unusually Princess Ursa asked Ty Lee to play the part of the girl. Azula thought it wrong and inaccurate but her mother insisted.

"Your time as his lover was short and he didn't even complained." She told her. Mai rolled her eyes but it's annoyed that the prince didn't say a pip.

She danced and twirled with her long sleeves, showing her beauty to all. He smiled and cheered with the people around. She smiled to him cared his cheek, he hold her hand and gave her his jade*. She took the jade, then laughed and danced with it. He felt uncomfortable but maybe her long stay in the pools and lakes had made her forget proper manners.

Ty Lee twirled, sang a song and smiled at the Prince who observed her with his two brows raised. Probably he thought that she was some kind of exotic animal.

She danced until she thrown the jade. He became angered until he saw the body under her feet, and the woman transformed in a Kiyohime*. She was not his love but a minion of the Water Spirit. His love lied in the ground, with peaches* spread around her and her skin paled by the death.

Mai lied in the floor while eating dango and was thankful the idiot girl had died. She definitely was enjoying this part.

He had broken his word by declaring love to another, and she with it. He fought the spirit but it was too powerful, she laughed and laughed because her master had giving her part of himself in case he failed in the last battle and as protection against what treachery the ugly bird had prepared. He fought and fought with all his might, even thought he had the moon against him, because he didn't care for nothing else but to avenge his loved one.

Ty Lee made an strange smiling enemy who was difficult to attack because she always moved in the last second before the prince could even touch her. Ty Lee made the Prince circle the room several times, in her opinion Ty Lee was winning.

And so tired of his long battles he found himself at his end, the Kiyohime tried to use the water of the fountain to end him. And it seemed it was going to be that way, but in the last minute he felt the call of every firebender. Both attacked for the last time.

"Your Kingdome is in the night but mine is at day." He declared while the sun was rising and his fire increased.

Both felt into the ground, but only the Noble Lord raised, the Spirit had finally been banished. However his sadness was such that he didn't wanted to live in this world anymore, because he had broken his word. He decided to leave this world with honor and prepared to do it with his own sword. But such devotion should be rewarded and the Spirits did it. She opened her eyes and raised with him in the new dawn.

And as remainder of their love, the spirits gave the ugly birds a new form, instead of the brown color they were white or light yellow for the beauty of her warm soul and they had acquired too a hard shell to protect them from evilness...

They heard the sky tremble, it's getting late but the rain hasn't stop. Princess Ursa rose from her place.

"I don't think the storm will pass soon. I'll inform you parents that they don't need to worry, you can stay the night if needed." Ty Lee and Mai looked at each other, they have come to play with the princess several times but they never had spend the night."I'll bring more tea too." She said noticing the empty pot.

The kids watched her go in silence. Azula opened the window and searched something in the sky.

"The turtleducks!" The prince suddenly exclaimed. "It's the story of the turtleducks!" Azula rolled her eyes and made a gesture of repugnance. Ty Lee cued.

"What lame story for a lame animal."

It was.

The prince got angry. "It's about keeping your word!"

"The idiot couldn't distinguish between two women" the princess pointed. "How can that be praised?!"

"He's cheated by the evil spirit!"

"He was suppose to notice the different behavior" Azula argue. "She's always a weak, meek girl, how can she behave in that indecent manner? She could even have another appearance. He's a idiot."

"It's not true" Ty Lee intervened, Azula looked at her. "I have heard the story before, it's said that the Kiyohime spirit had the same appearance than the ugly duck."

Azula narrowed her eyes. "Still, the behavior was different." The Princess was right, the hero did a stupid mistake. "And he has problems fighting the water spirits with a dou of vipersalamander scales"

"If she knew of the scales, why she didn't fought before?" Mai asked.

"Yes, she could have gathered all the information necessary to streak him at his weakest point" Azula pointed. "Probably in a new moon in the summer. Surely she knew more about the spirit."

"She couldn't walk very fast, remember? It's until the Noble Lord took her out of the swap that she could be human again."

"She could have waited to escape in the most advantageous terrain." She replied with calmness. "The story says the Evil Spirit changed constantly of places to sleep." The princess seemed happy with her reasoning.

"He wasn't always in the swap." Ty Lee agree. "She could have escape by her own."

"She wasn't sure to accomplish that, she was afraid, he was very powerful. If she couldn't have pulled it by her own, it'd have been very difficult to escape a second time"

"She could have surprised him" The princess insisted. "Burned him."

"She wasn't a bender" The princess got annoyed with the prince reply "She didn't knew that she could regain her human form, as a bird she couldn't made weapons. That's why she had to wait."

"And it isn't kind of selfish she didn't do anything before the Water Spirit attacked?" She intervened. "People were fighting and she was cleaning the kitchen, when she knew things about the Evil Spirit."

"She was afraid the people gave her back to the Evil Spirit."

"The men almost die and she excuses herself with that?" Azula paced in the room. "Mai is right, she's very selfish a Kingdome was drag to war and she only cleans the kitchen." she crossed her arms. "If it's me, I wouldn't have care for the stupid flowers." Mai nodded, flowers could die. "What would have you done?"

"Cut his throat" she immediately answered.

"Paralyzed him." Ty Lee said. "Probably he'll drown." She shrugged.

"It'd have been great if I could lightingbend and fry him in the spot."

"Great!" Mai said. Ty Lee made the sound of the lighting and the thunder. The three laughed.

"But..." the Prince murmured.

A lighting illuminate the room, followed by a strong thunder. Ty Lee screamed and Azula run to opened the window. Mai closed her eyes however she still saw the white. Even if she covered her ears the sound of the thunder made her deaf for a while.

The Prince said something and Azula laughed, she opened the door of the room and went out. The Prince was going to follow her but he looked at them and decided to stay. Mai put a hand in Ty Lee shoulder who still had her hands covering her ears.

"It surprised me." She felt embarrassed. "I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" Mai asked. She nodded.

The Prince looked at the room, perhaps he felt uncomfortable, he was not used to be alone with them.

"Mom will come back soon, I'm sure" he said picking the scroll from the floor and watched it with a frown.

"I liked the story." Ty Lee told him. "It's about love."

He nodded. "With a strong devotion." Mai will disagree, the men basically cheated her with another woman. "And forgiveness, both do mistakes." Stupid mistakes.

Ty Lee nodded. "Indeed, my mom said that even if you love someone you can't hurt him, even if you don't want to." The Prince looked at her. Mai guessed that made sense, her parents reprimanded her for her own good. She needed to be a good girl and she had to learn how to do that. "That's why you should be very careful with the ones you love." He agreed.

"But in the end, everything goes fine." He smiled and put the book in the corner of the room.

"In an older version, she dies." Ty Lee reveled. The Prince made shocked expression. "And the spirits honored her with the turtleduck, the soft part is like her kind and tender soul, and the shell is like her strong faith in the love and goodness. The Noble Lord it's suppose to never fall in love with anyone and always takes care of the animals." He looked at the floor. "Mom said it's because relationships can be very fragile too. But people didn't like that end and so the one with a happy ending is more popular."

What a scam, the story could have been better if the girl had died.

"I think I prefer the happy one." He murmured.

"So do I" Ty Lee smiled at him. Both looked at her and she grimaced. "She prefers horror stories." Ty Lee confessed to the Prince after a long silence.

"I don't" she was scare of those, but they had little romance.

"The gory the better." That may have some true.

He shrugged. "I prefer stories with adventures and battles." He walked to the door and they followed him, probably he was going to look for his mother. "Some of them are gory."

Ty Lee giggled, Mai was going to roll her eyes but the smile of the Prince stopped her.

"Romantic stories aren't that bad" Ty Lee commented nonchalantly looking at them.

Both made a disgusting face.

"Just silly."

"They're not" Ty Lee complained.

"Have you ever meet a marriage who are madly in love?" Mai challenged them.

Ty Lee opened her mouth then closed it. Ty Lee's mother had been betrothed to her father since children, rarely they were seen together, her father dedicated to his job in the government and her mother was always throwing parties. Her own parents were a political match, two powerful families joining fortune and status. And Prince Ozai and Princess Ursa were a match for the benefit of the Nation. Even Prince Iroh married Princess Zhen Huan, the daughter of the powerful Asakura clan.

The Prince and Ty Lee looked at her.

"My mother believes in love" The prince mumbled. She cocked a brow. "But you're right."

She felt terrible.

*Kabocha is a japanese pumking. Decided to stick with the mochis because Azula liked them in Smoke and Shadow.

*The valley of the lost flowers. Another story I created for another fanfic, features Koh.

*Uta Gurata. Japanese Card Game, contains 100 cards, with a waka poem written on each. I used to play a simplified game while studying japanese, it’s fun.

*Momotaro. A famous Japanese folklore story.

*The dance of the monkey and the sparrow is part of a japanese folklore story from Japanese Children’s favorite stories by Florence Sakade.

*Doriyaki and dango are japanese sweets.

*Jade and peaches. Reference to some poems from the Book of songs, ancient chinese poetry. But they are expression of love.

* Kiyohime. A japanese spirit, part woman part serpent. I just used the name because the story of the Kiyohime is different that the one I used here.

#maikofluffweek19 #Zuko #Mai #atla maiko #Zumai #Azula #ty lee

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talldarkandroguesome · 6 years ago

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12th of Morning Star, Loredas

As soon as Tel went for lunch, I left my room. I went to see if Qau-dar was around to give him a new tea that Amilion had given me as a gift.

I hadn’t heard his usual greeting to the others when he goes for a meal, so I knew he was in his room. I knocked on the door and saw what looked like someone standing in there. I think I even heard breathing, but he did not answer. He did not move.

I apologized for not being around as much. Told him how much I missed his company.

I was met with the same stony silence.

He must be upset with me. Maybe something to do with the way I was acting during the New Life Festivities? Perhaps he is not happy with how cold I’ve been to Tel. I don’t know.

I asked him if I had upset him and begged him to at least tell me if I had done something to offend him.

No response.

I decided then that it was best if I just went to the Cathedral of Webs early. I did not want to face Tel forcing more of that awful Altmeri food upon me and if I could not spend the time with Qau-dar, there was no reason left to stay.

I helped the acolytes with their cleaning tasks. I helped to polish tables, to wax floors, to prepare meals. It was so much more pleasant to do these things for a cause I believe in than it had been when I was force to work for the Temple.

The Earl gave me a new task, a prominent merchant to extract information from. I had to make sure that she did not now what I was up to. Being so close to my name day, it was simple enough to have her feel comfortable with providing me information. All it took was using the name of Lilandril’s grandmother to spark interest in my presence and a couple of purchases to be delivered to the manor.

The Earl had been very specific about my needing to get information from one of the Sapiarchs. According to rumors I have overheard, there is a Sapiarch that makes the rounds through the city. One who has a particular fondness for books on foreign cultures. So who better to find, than the most prestigious bookseller and printer of lost texts?

It was easy to offer her some Dunmeri titles that she could borrow for reproduction. I made sure not to give anything that might be particularly useful as propaganda for the Dominion.

When I steered the topic towards her clientele, she was only too happy to tell me all about her patrons among the city’s most influential. She listed the name of the Sapiarch who I have been assigned to gather information from. When I played at surprise, she was only too happy to boast about their closeness.

She even told me that the Sapiarch has an interest in speaking with foreigners. With more and more outlanders petitioning to enter the Isles, it seems this particular Sapiarch is keen to learn their motivations. I could not understand if it was to ease with the entry process or to try and discourage immigration, but I casually said that if ever this Sapiarch wished to learn more of Dunmeri culture, I would be honored to share the, admittedly out of date, knowledge of my people.

This offer was taken up quite enthusiastically and the merchant said she would speak with the Sapiarch the next time they met to discuss an order of books. I also paid a runner to take a missive back to Ulyn, to have him prepare the books for the merchant post haste and bring them to her shop and to receive the items I had ordered.

If I can gain an audience with the Sapiarch, it is possible that a combination of my Prince’s boon and my birth gift can find me the information that the Earl seeks.

I was in a fabulous mood when I returned to tell the Earl of the future arrangement. I even explained my plan to use a tandem of skills in order to extract the precise information that he sought.

The Earl seemed pleased that I was following his task to the letter. I asked if there was a way to keep the Sapiarch from being able to detect my probing their memories the way the Earl had noticed when I accidentally saw his. He warmed me to stay away from those with proficiency in Mysticsm, that not everyone would have the ability to sense as much. When I showed my relief, he told me that I should still be weary, for even those not masters of a magical field of study may know a large amount of spells.

I must proceed with caution, feel out this Sapiarch very carefully when we meet.

And yet, I cannot help but feel excited for the chance the Earl has given me. To give me such an important scouting mission lets me know that he has deemed me worthy of the task.

I was so excited that I went to see Farya and Amilion afterwards.

They were happy to see me and Farya said she had bought something special to show me just how much she missed me. I was rather surprised and touched.

She bent me over and showed me just how much she had missed being able to enjoy my company. Apparently when she had not been there with Amilion and I, she was having her toy crafted.

They both took their turn in showing their joy and my return. I felt filled with joy. I sometimes forget when we are apart, just how much I have missed them.

I had meant to return before dawn so that I would not have to hear as much complaining from Tel, but Amilion can be so persuasive with his tongue. Why should I wish to get a tongue lashing from Tel, when I could receive such more pleasant treatment from Amilion’s?

Tel threw a guge fit about my being gone so long. Called me a child. Called me rude. They acted as though I was being unreasonable for not wishing to eat our hosts’ meals. As though I had some duty to spend my full days just sitting in my chambers waiting for one of the Altmer to open my door ans ask me to enjoy their company.

I tried to reason with Tel, but they were completely unable to see things from my point of view. Plenty of false sympathy, but nothing genuine. Which is exactly what they kept demanding of me!

Honesty they ask for. Then sincerity. And when I said that I needed to keep my secrets, they seemed hurt.

They were hurt! When they already told me that if I tell them the truth they are neither willing to promise to keep the secret, or to not turn me into the guard immediately. That’s fetching friendship!

I left Tel and went to the baths. It is the only thing that the Altmer can manage to do properly, even if it is all artificially maintained.

And yet, Tel says they cannot leave things on a bad note. I was surprised when they climbed into the large spring with me and began to kiss me, after they had already objected to my earlier attempts at apology.

All in all, it was a good time. I forgave them some of their comments. I haven’t forgotten them, but I have allowed some measure of forgiveness.

Today I need to go back to work on finding a way to get close to the Sapiarch. I have some books on them that I wish to catch up on as well. And yet... I am so tired. A mer cannot live on fine wine alone, he must sleep sometime.

#ESO #TES #Dunmer #Altmer #Bosmer #RP #Elder Scrolls Online #The Elder Scrolls

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defunctblogtobedeleted · 5 years ago

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8/28/19 8:09pm - Meanwhile, In Real Time (basically all of aug ‘19)

So today I only have one patient for the first time in like half a year. I guess it makes sense since it’s the end of august and insurance policies are starting to roll over. After so many busy weeks of work it’s really exciting though.

And it couldn’t have happened at a better time. For one I’m pretty excited to get writing and catching up on this past year. But for TWO, World of Warcraft Classic just launched this week. I wasn’t sure if I was going to like it. Yknow I never played it before because I was worried how it would eat my life like Runescape did. But Spencer and a bunch of NC Melee peeps wanted me to play so I’m in there. Looks like my obsessions really have cycled in order.

[continued at 11:04pm after putting pts to bed] Pokemon (first grade), Magic (third grade), Runescape (fourth grade), Halo/Gears (7th-9th), Guitar Hero (8th-10th), Quiz Bowl (11th&12th) , Ultimate Frisbee (12th-soph), League of Legends (soph-senior), Melee (senior-last year). I have a kind of filthy habit of playing so much that it’s debilitating and then finally breaking out of it only to move on to doing the same thing with something else.

Since quitting melee I’ve gotten obsessed with Pokemon and Magic, so it looks like getting into WoW was inevitable.

Just kidding, an unscheduled 2nd patient showed up and it turns out he’s actually supposed to be here so I’m not QUITE so free as all that, but it’s still not 3 patients, 2 is totally easy for me now.

Lol I took this screenshot when I got in to the office

as of now I’m all caught up with work and I’ve still got 133 minutes to go, so looks like I have plenty of time to write for a second.

So what do I have to catch up on? well my days have been looking like weds-thurs-fri are always work, saturday I’ll stay up all day doing something, sunday I’m usually sleeping in, Monday I’m usually either playing DnD or chilling playing games, and Tuesday is a chill day until karaoke.

The past two weekends have been kind of crazy though, so I just wanted to write about them for a minute before I got too far gone.

Actually, let’s go back to 3 weekends ago. I visited Dars because I needed to, it’s been too long. I meant to write a lot more than I did, but instead I stayed up late into the night watching Andi draw shit on twitch. I’ve been thinking about her a lot lately, mostly trying to collect all my thoughts on what I want to write about, but I definitely miss her and hope she’s doing okay. I ‘accidentally’ responded to a question she asked when she was talking to herself on stream, I hadn’t meant to talk to her at all I just wanted to see her do her thing and reflect on her a little. Really I wanted to watch her play breath of the wild. I miss us playing that together. Watching her enjoy something I enjoyed so much really made me happy. Anyway, I only bring that up because I tried to tune in again to actually watch her play BotW and found out she blocked me from her channel. I could still watch, which was nice, but I couldn’t say anything. Probably for the best. After watching her for a few hours I unfollowed her channel so I wouldn’t even try anymore.

Now you’re just somebody that I used to know.

I did that song at karaoke last night. I practiced in the bathroom and the car beforehand and was nailing it I thought. But I got up on stage and I was thinking of you and I bombed it. I haven’t bombed a song so hard since the time I tried to sing you I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing when I was in drunk-screaming mode, or the first time I tried to do MakeDamnSure. And those were when I was drunk. This I like just tried to get to the high notes and on stage I just couldn’t. My voice kind of broke. I cleared the crowd. It was humiliating, to be honest. I don’t know if I was tired from playing 12 hours of WoW with spencer yesterday (amazing, btw. I had a ton of fun), or if I was thinking of you too much, or if I was actually just floundering from making the first mistake (which doesn’t quite make sense because I’ve made mistakes and then fixed them easily in plenty of songs before). But it was awful. I got to hang out with some friends for a bit, sang The Hand That Feeds and did excellently at it, got some good cheers and shit, but I still felt like ass. Went home and played some melee and some more WoW and stayed up until 6am and slept 12 hours lmao.

So I had an avocado for dinner and now here I am. I’ve been doing more fasting days lately where I eat really light. They’re not true fasting days because usually I eat a bunch of nuts or something. But I don’t eat a big meal like I normally do once a day. Also I wanted to go back to Darlin’s because we watched zoolander, and at one point he says “bulimia is a great way to lose pounds before a shoot” and I was like “oh yeah, true.” lol so now if someone makes me eat a bunch of ice cream with them (darlin and jill), then I’ll do it and throw it up after -_-. Not the healthiest but I’ve only done it on like two or three occasions. I’m mostly being good. Only exercising once a week lately though, WoW kinda blew up everything this week and I’ve been hella busy lol.

Okay so week after Darlin’s, I made some new friends at karaoke that my buddy Skyler introduced me to there. I drove up to Virginia on Saturday to do Quarry Fest that tessa and her boyfriend had planned out on his property. It was fucking phenomenal. Spent the day day drinking and swimming, it was gorgeous out, beautiful people in swimsuits everywhere, made a whole bunch of new friends who loved me because they already loved tessa, saw a handful of old high school friends. I really got strong attraction vibes from my friend Emily, but she was there with a new boyfriend so ah well such a shame for her lmao. Stayed up until like 4 in the morning talking with people around a big bonfire, it was just like a fun old rappahannock field party where everyone knew everyone at least by a removal factor of one. Such a beautiful time. I fucking drunkenly danced my ass off all night while these live musicians and djs were on. Just phish style sway jammed out in the sand, made my legs fucking exhausted lol. Moving in sand is so fucking hard! I’d get a drink, chug it down, spin around drunkenly jam around for a bit, sober up, get a new drink, rinse and repeat lmao. The Diet Dr Pepper and white rum idea later in the night was miserable though. FUCK diet drinks they’re not adequate mixers. holy blegh. plus the rum was hot as balls I need to find a new kind of liquor to keep in my trunk. The best idea I’ve heard from people so far is sake. I loved Tessa’s boyfriend’s family too. The one little brother had the same supreme cheetah print that I had on except he had the boxers, we really hit it off actually. After sleeping in my car for the night I woke up and went skinny dipping for like an hour or so, I spent a lot of the next morning talking to him and his girlfriend, mostly entertaining her with the weird stories that I tell on here. She said I was probably the craziest person she’d ever met, and wished that I lived closer so that she could hook me up with her sister. She said she needed to try someone fun like me out LMAO. Then their family made a huge breakfast at their house and I got to pig out on some lox and chit chat with tessa about shit before heading back to Raleigh.

That’s right, I went there and came back for just a day because I needed to be back the next night for Emo Karaoke LOL. There’s no way I was gonna miss it, it’s only once a month.

It was the craziest thing though. My friends caitlin and gretchen came to emo karaoke but it hadn’t started yet because of an open mic poetry night, so they split to go to Ruby’s annual No Pants Party and told me to meet up with them if I wanted to. I was the first person to sing, I did The Used and it went fantastically. I met this guy morgan and his girlfriend elizabeth I think, and she emailed me a video of it lol I love it. I also sang backup vocals for him on MakeDamnSure, I was so happy that he asked me, I’ve literally practiced doing the backup singing just in case someone ever did hahaha. But after my song this girl walks up to me and says “did you go to chapel hill? Do you remember who I am?” I look at her and it’s none other than fucking LEXI. Like huge crush in college Lexi. Like written about her at least a handful of times at LEAST Lexi. Like I named my fucking CAR after you Lexi. So I was like “HOLY SHIT YES” oh my god and caught up with her and I’m 90% sure she was there with another guy, but I got to meet her friends and chit chat and I screamed my fucking throat out that night. My voice was already toasty from singing in the car all the way up and back from virginia but after that it was torched lmao. I also did The Used+MCR’s Under Pressure with my friend from there Kenny, got some chick’s number, and the list was full so I dipped after that.

Went to the no pants party and it wasn’t super crazy, but I got some beautiful pics lol. Caitlin helped me tie up my shirt super cute, I wore it as a blouse and as an ascot hahaha. But hanging with them at the no pants party mostly got me to this afterparty at a friend’s place downtown. I had rum and bought some coke that we threw in the freezer, but instead of mixing the coke and rum me and Jacob had this great idea to mix the rum with freezie pops to see if it was any good. Did like 3 shots testing it out to see if the ratio could work. Mostly it tasted like a bad slushie lol. Went to the porch to smoke a cig and people started passing some coke around so I did a little of that, and started having this long ass conversation with this girl MJ. We hit it off for like literally an hour on the porch at 4 in the morning. We talked about pokemon and tons of nerdy video game shit, and it turns out she had been at karaoke that week, I had already listened to her singing! I got her number and have since tried to hit her up a few times to hang out. She’s always responded to all of my texts IMMEDIATELY. like within the minute fast. It’s weird. But unfortunately either because she’s not actually interested or because she’s truly been too busy, I haven’t been able to meet up with her to do anything. I guess we’ll see if that ever develops, but I think she was really cool. I really hope I at least get to make a pass at her. After that I brought gretchen back to my place to hang out. Didn’t try to hook up with her or anything, but we just wanted to chill and do some blow that I had leftover and wanted to get rid of. Did some talking about some fucked up shit going on with some of her friends dying, but it was mostly in the context of her wanting to go back to the party to try to find an adderall on the ground when we ran out of shit. At like 8 in the morning we drove around to pick up some shit, but nobody was awake, she gave me half an adderall to try to help me stay up but after I popped it I still took a nap in the car while we waited so I was like yeah nah I’m tapping out. After driving to virginia and back and having two late party nights I was fucking spent and didn’t want to miss my appointment to drop my car off for repairs. Honestly though, I have no fucking idea what Brandon saw in her that made him so coocoo for her. She seems like your typical party hardy everything-sucks kind of girl. I don’t think I’ve heard her say a positive thing about...anything. She’s always shit talking or talking down about life or saying she wants to go somewhere else that’s cooler, or that older parties were more fun or some shit. Meh. Luckily I’m not the one tryna bang her, and Caitlin totally balances her out with how smiley and happy she is when I hang out with them. Her and Jacob are cute as fuck too.

But I DID end up making it to my appointment. My car is almost done being fixed!!

Then I had a board game night that monday, me and Trent and Steven played some of this train game called snowdonia and I narrowly lost. Steven almost always beats me, that fucker lol. I really respect how smart he is about magic and game theory in general tbh.

Last week there was karaoke and work. At karaoke I found out this really cute smiley girl Hannah (a friend/coworker of my lesbian couple friends) is getting a divorce from her husband (she’s like 24), and so thattt’s pretty interesting. I don’t wanna make moves because she’s wonderful and I don’t want to be a douche, but she’s like... still the happiest person I’ve ever met even in the midst of changing her entire life. I kinda wish I could go on a date with her just to find out more about her lol. Saturday I didn’t sleep so that I could go to my friend Helena’s place for her to dye and cut my hair. I really followed through on wanting it to look like Brad Pitt from Once Upon A Time In Hollywood like I decided when we saw it darlin’s lol. I really wanted to change my hair, I’m kind of sick of having bangs in my face and need to symbolically move on to doing something new. Then saturday afternoon/evening I got drunk as fuckkkk with broscious and irene for their housewarming party. First time getting really drunk with them it was so much fun! We played a drinking game while watching a glassblowing show where we drank every time they said glass or blew, so it was pretttty good hahaha. I probably overdid it with the threesome and trap jokes later with their friends when we got to the bar lol, but they seemed so innocent I had to fuck with them a little hahaha. Fell asleep on the floor of their living room at like 3 in the morning because someone else had dibs on the couch. Woke up at like 7am blegh, found out I lost my house key lol, went back to sleep at my place til noon, then went to play board games with steven trent and reyad again. After that I went to boxcar to meet up with Maya, and she had brought a bunch of her coworkers and Rianne as usual, so it was a great time. We bounced from boxcar to Rianne’s place, got to drink with Ollie and played this weird frog golf game and we discussed whether Blonde or Channel Orange was the better Frank Ocean album. They ALL were fighting me that Channel Orange was just better in every way, but I still think Blonde is incredible. I offered to take Jill home to her place since she lives nearby, we got some mcdonalds and watched some american dad and had some great sex. and again the next morning, and again in the afternoon. So luckily that’s still working out, I thought it had fallen apart, but I’ll explain more on that later on when I finish playing catchup. I took her back to her car and we got some good ass ramen downtown.

We made tentative plans to hang out again the next day and maybe go thrifting and I spent the rest of monday playing Melee for a couple hours. But I woke up at 9am and started playing WoW with spencer, so when she hit me up that she was getting off work at like 3pm I was in the middle of a 6 hour bingefest playing WoW for the first time in my life. He told me I should keep playing with him so I didn’t fall behind and so I thought about it... and then I did lmao. I said that I was nerding out with my roommate and asked if she wanted to hang out after karaoke. She said yeah definitely but she might go to bed earlier than normal (~3) because she had to work a double. I hit her up at midnight to leave karaoke early after that embarrassment of a performance, but she never responded. I think she said she wanted to hang out so that she could blow me off too, tbh. But jokes on her, I got to play more melee until I could get through the login queue for WoW and got to play for another 3 hours. Perfect.

Though more sex would’ve been nice, for sure.

Anyway, things are going wonderfully. I’m going to a big concert in raleigh in two weeks. Probably just nerding out this weekend since I mixed up my weekends and didn’t make plans. Helena dyed my hair with highlights to look like brad pitt, but I’m changing it to be totally blonde like Maya and Rianne want instead. They miss my old yellow hair lol and Oliver and everyone I’ve asked did too so I’m gonna try it out again.

Definitely ready to move forward and try some new things.

I’ve been thinking about Andi way too much the past two weeks. It sucks. I really want to talk to her. And give her her chair back. So I want to see her. But I know I’m feeling good with everything so really things are better off just moving on I guess. Maybe once I finally write my catchup posts about her I can stop thinking about her. But it’s made me procrastinate a lot, I’m like literally doing anything I can to not write these last handful of catchup posts...

But I promise I will soon. I need to do it. Maybe that’s what I’ll do saturday while I wait for the queue for WoW to thin out lmao. It’s currently 12:06 and I still have an estimated time of 13 minutes after trying to log in at 7:45 lol.

Also tryna cop some supreme clothes tomorrow. Wish me luck, I Really hope I can get this tiger print jacket and hat. Boutta drop a mint lol. Clothes are kinda fun. It’s nice not dressing like a hobo all the time, I guess. Mostly because it’s hot. Once it’s the right temperature to wear pajama pants again you better believvvve I’m gonna just get fancy sweatpants lmfao.

Anyway, queue’s finally done! holy shit yeah it’s only 12:15 Kappa. Gonna go play some WoW love you guys bye <3

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nymeria-elladora · 8 years ago

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22: Fabian Lovett

***NOTICE: This story is moving locations! This will be the last chapter popping up in full on Tumblr. From now on, you can find this story at http://archiveofourown.org/works/10962963/chapters/24405150.***

The previous day hadn’t been nearly as hideous as Harry had imagined it would be. In fact, when he’d gone to sleep that night, he recounted the entire thing and realized that it had been, overall, a rather good day. He’d even found time to apologize to Hermione for blowing up at her about the mix up with Care of Magical Creatures. He was happy enough to be back in Firenze’s class, after all. With his mind uncharacteristically at ease, he fell asleep very quickly that night and, as a result, woke up a bit earlier than usual the following morning.

He lay awake, enjoying the quiet of the dormitory, the gentle snoring of Ron and Neville, and the weight of his blankets. It was in this lazy stupor that he remembered he’d scheduled quidditch try outs for that afternoon. His team captain was Demelza Robbins. She’d been a chaser with Ginny when Harry had captained the team. She’d done very well then and had apparently impressed the school enough to win the post. Harry had a sneaking feeling that, had she not already been made a prefect, Ginny would have been the captain instead. Still, Demelza would be good to have around and she seemed excited at the prospect of having Harry as a coach. He found he was quite looking forward to working with her as well, though he did have some doubts about who might show up for the try out. While he mulled it over, he heard a crash from down in the common room, followed by a string of muttered curses. Seeing as he wasn’t going to be able to fall back asleep, Harry pulled himself out of bed and went to investigate. When he got to the bottom of the stairs, he saw Ginny repairing her quidditch bag which had apparently ripped right open, as all her gear was strewn around the floor.

“Ginny?” He laughed, going toward her. She looked up and smiled.

“Hey, Harry. What are you doing up?”

“Just couldn’t sleep anymore. What about you?”

“I have to meet Jeff in ten minutes,” she replied, finally happy with her work on her bag. She waved her wand and all of her things leapt back into it.

“Oh, yeah, how is that going?” Harry asked, now very curious. “Do you think it’s helping you at all?”

“Oh, yeah,” she nodded enthusiastically. “I’m already better than I’ve ever been. I can’t imagine how good I’ll be by the end of the year.”

“So you’re ready for try outs, then?”

“Yeah,” she grinned. “I have a feeling I’ll be making the team. But I’ve got to get going now. I’ll see you later.” She leaned forward and kissed him before dashing off out of the portrait hole. Harry watched her go, red pony tail swishing behind her.

They hadn’t spent very much time together since returning to Hogwarts. During the summer, he’d barely been able to visit the Burrow since her family had been busy. His visit at the end had left them time for plenty of stolen moments, though. Ginny was too busy again; she was training every spare minute she got. Harry tried to quash the thought that maybe he shouldn’t have recommended her to Jeff after all because he knew how selfish it was.

He checked his watch and saw that it was only five thirty. Hermione often rose at absurd hours to study, regardless of the fact that the school year had just begun. Harry thought he might spend some time that morning with her and called out experimentally, “Kreacher?”

The ugly old elf appeared with a crack. “Master Potter?” He asked. “I did not expect…it has been so long, I…”

“’Hello, Kreacher,” Harry said, smiling. “How was your summer?”

“Very good, master,” the elf said, brightening a bit. “We cleaned the whole castle. And some foreign wizards and witches came to put the walls back together. We swept up when they were done and made them meals.”

“You did a very good job. The castle is in top shape.”

“Thank you, Master Potter.”

“Can I ask you a favor?”

“Of course.”

“Would you bring up some tea and toast for Hermione and I?”

“Just tea and toast, sir?”

“Tea and whatever you have to spare for breakfast. I don’t want you to make anything difficult. Bring it at six.”

“Yes, Master. Of course.” The elf vanished and Harry sat down on a sofa, staring at the ashes where the fires had gone out last night. Kreacher, he thought. I’m glad he’s happy here. Harry was struggling with the fact that his first instinct had been to call for Dobby. There was a pang in his chest as he thought about the tiny grave beside Shell Cottage.

Kreacher had come though, just as surely as Dobby would have. Harry wondered if he could call any elf that worked at Hogwarts. It occurred to him then that he only knew the name of one other elf down in the kitchens, Winky. He wasn’t even certain that Winky was still there. He sat pondering this until he heard a door creak open at the top of the stairs to the girls’ dormitory. Just as he’d guessed, Hermione padded down the stairs in her socks, shoes in one hand to keep her steps quiet, and her arms full of books.

“Harry!” She said, jolting a bit when she saw him. “What are you doing awake?”

“Just waiting for you. I saw Ginny off to her early morning practice and thought I’d wait.”

“Oh, that’s very nice of you. I was just going to study.”

“What have you got to study? We’ve only just started.”

“I know, but Professor Hawthorne assigned us a big reading for tomorrow and I’ve only gotten through it once.”

“You read everything twice?”

“Three times if I can,” she replied, sitting down and setting her books on the floor. Kreacher appeared then, carrying a tray with tea, toast, scones, fruit, jam, and butter.

“Oh, thank you,” Hermione said, taking the platter from him.

“You’re very welcome. Will that be all?”

“Yes, Kreacher, you can go,” Harry said, giving the elf a nod and a smile before he vanished.

Hermione buttered a scone and Harry asked her if she knew any of the names of the other elves. “I don’t, actually,” she said, taking a bite. “I’ve never asked. “

They ate their breakfast in friendly silence while Hermione studied and Harry finally got to look through her text book at Bao Li. Ron woke up around seven and they went down to the Great Hall so he could eat as well. Ginny joined them just as breakfast ended, red-faced and breathless.

“Blimey,” she wheezed, slinging her leg over the bench and dropping down. “Today was rough.”

“Yeah?” Ron said, watching his sister steal his fork to stab a sausage off a platter. “What’d you do?”

“Dives and turns and such,” she replied, waving her hand around. “It was a scary lesson; Jeff was really hard on me about it.”

Harry didn’t like hearing that, but Hermione spoke up first. “Hard on you? For being scared?”

“We talked about it when we finished,” Ginny said, leaning against Harry’s arm and resting her head on his shoulder. “He was tougher than usual because he knew I was scared. It helped take my mind off of the dives because I was mad at him. It worked, but my heart is still slowing down.” Harry smiled and kissed her head, deciding to bite his tongue. He didn’t like the idea of Ginny being scared by her practices with Jeff, but at least the man was making sound decisions about her training and he’d let her go early. Because she was back before the end of breakfast, it meant she was able to walk to class with the rest of the Gryffindors.

On Tuesdays and Thursdays, the day began with History of Magic with the Hufflepuffs and then Herbology with the Slytherins just before lunch. The afternoon was composed of Defense Against the Dark Arts with the Ravenclaws and Astronomy late that night with the Ravenclaws again. Students could pick up more classes, if they were so inclined, but Harry and Ron certainly weren’t. Ginny, on the other hand, had an Herbology class and Hermione had Ancient Runes.

Really, as a seventh year, one only had to study in the courses one intended to take N.E.W.T.S. for. To be an auror, one only needed the five core areas: Potions, Charms, Transfiguration, Defense Against the Dark Arts, and Astronomy. Harry intended to take those classes in both halve of the year; he figured once he was finished with Divination, he would switch to Herbology. He hadn’t minded that. He wished he could quit History of Magic altogether, but he wasn’t sure what he would put in its place in the coming term. Hagrid’s class seemed completely terrifying and anything Hermione studied was simply out of the question. He figured Padma might have some advice for him and he intended to ask her about it when they arrived at DADA.

On their way to the classrooms, they passed a few Blackhearth students. When they rounded a corner, they almost ran directly into Julian Hawthorne and Mauve Cleary. The pair had armfuls of brown paper-wrapped parcels and only Hermione was quick enough with her wand to stop them all crashing to the floor.

“Whew, thank you!” Mauve laughed, collecting her things from where Hermione held them levitating in the air.

“Not at all,” Hermione beamed. Harry noticed Neville was turning a bit pink around his neck.

“H-hello, Mauve,” he stammered.

“Hey, Nev,” she said, giving a quick wink. “Where are you all off to?”

“Defense Against the Dark Arts,” Ron said, helping Julian arrange things in his arms. “What about you lot?”

“Professor Sprout had all kinds of things ready to be harvested in the greenhouses,” Mauve replied. “Jules and I stopped by to help her since she said she’d pay us off by letting us take home the extras. We’ve both got about a potions cabinet apiece right now; my haul is for Tempest. I’m never short on ingredients.”

“Potions?” Ron laughed, turning back to Julian. “I thought you made wands.”

“I do!” Julian huffed. “I’m very good at it, too. So good that sometimes I forget to stock up on potions ingredients and almost fail a class.”

“You’re lucky you have me,” Mauve teased. “You and Tempest both. I swear, it takes five big sisters to keep you two alive.”

“We wouldn’t die,” the dark haired boy said, rolling his eyes. “We’d just…”

“Just what, exactly?”

Julian chewed his lip for a moment as he thought, finally replying, “Honestly, we’d probably end up like Cyan.” Mauve snorted and Harry furrowed his brow.

“Who’s Cyan?” He asked.

Still laughing, Mauve explained, “He’s my little brother. He didn’t go to Blackhearth; he ended up at Salem. He’s a, um…a free spirit. Very connected to nature.”

“So connected, in fact, that he went camping one summer,” Julian continued, a grin plastered on his face. “And forgot to go back to school for his final year.”

“It happens!” Mauve said, shrugging. “Enough picking on Cy. He’s a gentle daisy, he doesn’t deserve this. Anyway, you all need to get to class.”

“Do you want to come with us?” Ginny said, clearly excited. “You can sit in.”

The two Blackhearth students exchanged a look, Mauve raising her eye brows and Julian cocking his head. “I’m outside of curriculum in my next class,” he said. “I could stay.”

“Technically I’m working but, like, I handle plants,” Mauve replied. “They’re generally alright to be left unattended. I could stay, too.”

“So you’re coming?” Hermione said, smiling brightly. Mauve and Julian continued to stare at each other, both of their expressions becoming more pained until finally, Mauve groaned and broke eye contact.

“No,” she sighed. “We’re supposed to make contact with your professors before we just show up. But we know this time is free now! Maybe next week. Who do you have this class with?”

“Lovett,” Neville said, still pink. “He’s new.”

“Oh, Fabian!” Julian said, nodding. “That one’s easy. We’ll grab him next time he comes to Blackhearth.”

Harry’s nose had wrinkled immediately, hearing Julian use Professor Lovett’s first name. “Does he visit often?” he asked.

“Yeah, he and Nym are friends. He usually spends a little time on our side of the fireplace after dinner on Wednesdays. I’ll clear it with him tomorrow. Now, go,” he laughed, stepping out of their way. “There’s no way you’re not late now.”

“Hey,” Ron called, walking backward as the group hurried away. “Three o’clock still alright?”

“Oh!” Julian said, also turned the wrong way round. “Yes! See you then!”

“Alright, mate!” Ron gave a small wave and turned back, falling into a half-jog with the rest of the posse.

“What are you doing at three?” Harry asked.

“Not trying out for the bloody quidditch team again,” the red head laughed. “Since you and Ginny will be busy and Hermione’s going to the library for a bit, I was going to head over to Blackhearth to visit Julian. We’re going swimming in their lake; there’s no squid to drag you under over there.”

“You’re going too?” Neville asked. Both Neville and Ron were taller than Harry and could have conversations over his head, which he found immensely irritating.

“Are you swimming as well?” Ron asked.

“No,” Neville replied, turning from pink to red. “I’m going round to see Mauve. I-I’ll walk with you though.”

Ginny caught Harry’s eye and waggled her eyebrows, getting him to laugh just as they reached their classroom. They were barely on time and Harry had no time to speak to Padma as they hurried to their seats.

“You know, I’m not sure why we even have to take this class anymore,” Ron huffed, tossing down his bag. “If we were in Blackhearth, we would be outside of curriculum.”

“No we wouldn’t. You have to pass your N.E.W.T.S. for that,” Hermione snipped, taking her place between him and Ginny.

“Oh, you know what I mean.”

Harry didn’t add anything to the conversation but he agreed with Ron. He couldn’t think of a single reason he still needed to be attending DADA classes. He’d proven himself in the field; what else was he supposed to learn?

Professor Lovett strode to the front of the room, then, head stooped low over a piece of parchment. The girls still whispered about how handsome they thought the new professor was and, while this reaction reminded Harry of Gilderoy Lockhart, the man before him did not. Fabian Lovett was of average height with a slightly stocky build. His hair was a plain auburn brown and neatly groomed, though his eyebrows were just a bit thicker than average. He had an angular face with a square jaw, always a bit on the stubbly side with a bit of salt and pepper to the hair that grew there. His stormy grey eyes crinkled around the corners behind his green rimmed glasses when he smiled, which was a very frequent occurrence. However, as he went to the front of the room, his eyes were downturned while he read.

He chose not to wear traditional robes during his classes, instead favoring a wardrobe mostly composed of dark trousers and oversize, cable knit jumpers. Today, his jumper was forest green and a cluster of Ravenclaw girls near the front of the room tittered as he stooped over some papers on his desk, sipped from a mug of tea, and rolled up his shirt sleeves. This was his daily ritual in class: he reviewed his notes while the students settled and then he rolled up his sleeves. Once they were securely cuffed over his elbows, he would look up and greet the class with his usual, “Hello, all. I’m glad to see you’ve arrived safely. Shall we begin?”

The process never failed to annoy Harry. What was even more irksome was that Professor Lovett had never once needed to shush his class. In just a few short weeks, he’d already trained everyone to quiet down as soon as he touched his shirt sleeves. The first day, everyone had stayed quiet because they were all curious about him. He’d spent that class giving an overview of what they would cover that year and answered some questions and then they were dismissed. The second day, no one had yet had their curiosity quenched, so they stayed quiet again while he began teaching about the differences between hexes and jinxes. By the third class period, the students knew his shirt sleeve rolling pattern and by the fourth, that’s all it took to shut them up. Harry crossed his arms and sank down in his seat, glaring at Hermione and Ginny out of the corner of his eyes. They both had their books out and were staring eagerly forward.

“Hello all,” Lovett said, standing up straight and setting his hands on his hips. “I’m glad to see you’ve arrived safely. Shall we begin?”

He walked around to the front of his desk, crossing his ankles, and leaned against it before flicking his wand to close the door. Then he smiled at the whole class. “I want to commend all of you on your work thus far,” he said warmly. “I know that readings and notes can be very dull, but it’s a necessary part of the process. Today, we’ll actually be getting started with some spell work.”

Harry sat up a little straighter at this announcement.

“I am willing to bet that none of you will have had a lesson quite like the one we’re going to have today. I’m going to teach you all a very simple, but very important skill: how to take a curse.” Harry’s brow furrowed as the professor folded his arms, still speaking in his warm, even tone.

“As witches and wizards, I think all of you should expect to be hit with a curse or a nasty hex at some point in your lives, if you haven’t already experienced it. It’s not a pleasant thing, but it’s a very real risk we all face as members of the magical community. As such, it’s important that you all know how to minimize damage when you’re hit with an unfriendly spell. Yes, Luna?”

The blonde girl had stuck her hand in the air and let it flutter down as she spoke. “We’ve learned some defensive spells, sir,” she said. “Shields and such. Can’t we just block unwanted spells?”

“Of course,” Lovett nodded. “Of course you can. If you have your wand in your hand and the presence of mind to do so, of course you can protect yourself. But you may not always see an attack coming or you may not have a fast enough reaction time. There are myriad reasons you might not be able to defend yourselves and that’s alright. I’ll teach you the skills you need to take a hit. Quills up for some notes, please.”

The students took out parchment and inkwells as Professor Lovett began writing on the blackboard. He often chose to write by hand, rather than enchant the piece of chalk.

“The technique I’ll have you all practice is not necessarily for some of the more remedial hexes, like the jelly legs jinx or a tickling hex, although it can help with those. Generally, those ones are just best to build a tolerance too so they lose potency over time. Instead, we’re talking about more powerful curses, such as a knock-back jinx or a stunning spell. Something that will hit you and hit you hard.

“Now, the first thing you’ll need to do when you get hit is to relax your body. You’ll want to tense up. It’s a natural reaction especially since many curses hurt, but force your muscles to relax. Magic travels slower through taught muscles, so if you let the tension out of your body, the curse will pass through you more quickly.

“In the event that the curse you’re hit with causes you to fall or throws you back, it’s important that you know how to land. Keep your body relaxed, like we talked about, and it will hurt less when you hit the ground. If you’re thrown across a room, protect vital parts that could be injured on impact. Tuck your head into your chest and cover your neck with your arms, like so.” He demonstrated, curling his upper half down slightly. “This will help ensure that you won’t be knocked unconscious when you land. Draw a diagram of that if you want to.”

He turned back to the blackboard and sketched an image of someone in the pose he had just demonstrated, continuing to talk over his shoulder. “Don’t bother trying to land on your feet. You are far more likely to injure your knees or ankles than you are to actually land the way you want to. Fall to the ground and roll to a stop.

“This leads into our last step: if you’re knocked down, stay down. I can’t impress how important this is. Stay where you land and don’t move; keep your body limp and your head covered.”

Harry’s hand was in the air before he realized he’d moved. Lovett nodded at him.

“Just stay down?” He asked, more than a little incredulous. “That’s your advice as a professor of Defense Against the Dark Arts? If you’re hit with a curse, don’t actually defend yourself, just lie down?”

Lovett could have easily reprimanded Harry for forgetting to properly address him as sir, but instead he answered.“In most cases, someone that is willing to hit another person with a spell that will knock them down is looking for an escape route,” he replied, returning to his place against his desk. “They’re looking to incapacitate, not kill, though they may take more drastic measures if they feel they need to. But, usually, their goal is to knock you down or out of the way. Once they do that, if you stay down, they should have no reason to pursue you any further.”

“So if a dark wizard attacks you and tries to escape, you ought to just let them go?”

“It is highly inadvisable for any of you to engage another person in combat. You’re more likely to get hurt than anything else. Your own safety should be a priority. If that means letting your attacker get away, then yes, you ought to let them go.”

“That’s rubbish!” Harry snapped, jumping to his feet. Ginny tried to pull him back down, but he yanked his arm away. “Do you think Aurors are trained to just lay down after they get hit? D’you suppose this is what they teach over at Blackhearth?”

“Of course not,” Lovett replied, remaining infuriatingly calm. “Aurors and the student soldiers at Blackhearth are trained to pursue and engage a threat. They’re trained very effectively in those skills, but I am not looking at a class room full of aurors, Mr. Potter. That’s not who’s seated around you. You are not an auror and this is not Blackhearth. None of you have been trained how to fight.”

“That’s not true, sir,” Ginny said instantly. “A lot of us have been trained. A lot of us have actually done it, as well.”

Lovett turned his gentle, grey eyes on her for a long moment before he nodded, his face solemn. “I know,” he murmured. “I know that many of you had to defend yourselves last year. You were asked to do more than you should have ever had to. But I also know that some of you and your classmates did not fight; some of you ran. Some of you hid. Some of you submitted. It’s important that you all fully understand that every single one of those reactions was valid. You all did what you had to do to keep yourselves safe and, as your professor, that is my number one concern. I want you all safe.

“Not everyone has it in them to fight, Mr. Potter,” he continued, turning his focus back to Harry. “It is not my job to make you soldiers. My job is to teach you all how to defend yourselves. For some of you, self-defense might mean leading a counter attack; it might mean fleeing to safety; or it might mean falling to the ground and staying there. I don’t know what all of you are comfortable with and I can’t know the situations you’ll be in that might call for some of this training. The best I can do is show you each method and give you the tools to decide which to use.”

Harry stood there for just a moment longer, stunned into silence, before slowly sinking back into his seat. The class had just barely begun whispering when Professor Lovett called for their attention again. He spent a few more minutes going over notes and then asked the students to rise. He slid the desks to the edges of the room with a flick of his wand and conjured a series of soft floor pads with the following swoosh.

“Please pair up,” he instructed. “One person stand with their back to the mat, the other person should stand approximately eight feet away with their wand at the ready.”

The set up for this class was remarkably similar to the Defensive Magic class at Blackhearth, but there was no one monitoring form. Harry and Ron faced one another, neither one able to comfortably curse either Ginny or Hermione. Hermione paired with Neville, Ginny with Luna, and the rest of the class as they pleased. Lovett walked around between the pairs as they cursed one another, seemingly content to ignore all of Harry’s insubordination. He let them curse each other for fifteen minutes, helping students back to their feet, conjuring ice packs when needed, and praising everyone’s ragdoll impressions. Harry was varying his hexes, throwing Ron to the floor over and over again.

“Are you alright, mate?” Ron asked, getting to his feet after Harry had knocked him onto his mat.

“Shouldn’t I be asking you that?” Harry said, squaring up again. The elbow of his wand hand was aching and there was a wicked headache brewing behind his left eye.

“I mean, sure, but I didn’t…” He dropped his voice to a whisper. “I didn’t shout at Lovett in the middle of class.”

“I just, I don’t know…Everte Statum.”

Ron flew backward and hit the mat, rolling to a stop. “Did I do it right?” He asked, face pressed into the foam.

“I think so, yeah.”

“Great. I think I’m done,” he groaned. “Let’s switch, I just…I need to lie here for a bit.” Harry laughed and stepped forward, dropping down to sit beside his friend. They stayed quiet for a moment before Harry realized Ron’s previous question was still hanging unanswered.

“I got angry,” he sighed. “I didn’t like what Lovett had to say. I mean, I get it now, I just…I’m not sure.”

“You’ve been angry,” Ron said, rolling onto his side. “I mean, you’re usually—erm—short tempered. But…”

“But what?”

“You shouted at Hermione in the Great Hall.”

Harry nodded, staring hard at his knees. He’d been angry about not getting into Nym’s class, but he hadn’t given any thought to the fact that Ron hadn’t gotten in either.

“Are you alright about…the class?”

“I didn’t like going first, but I reckon the bit where I get to curse you should be alright.”

“No, not this class,” Harry laughed. “Nym’s class.”

“Oh, right. Erm…I suppose I am now. I got to talk to her about it; she told me why she didn’t pick me. She told me about you too, just so I’d pass it on.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I’ll tell you later, Lovett’s looking.” Ron pushed himself onto his hands and knees and Harry went to stand on his own mat. While being repeatedly cursed by his friend wasn’t pleasant, Harry found that his headache was waning now that he wasn’t the spell caster. It was certainly better that Harry and Ron had talked. Usually, they would let things like that linger for a few months at least. Perhaps the last year had taught them to speak a bit sooner. Regardless, they made it to the end of class with a few bruises, but on better terms.

The class gathered their things as Professor Lovett vanished the mats and returned the desks to their usual arrangement. The students filed out and Lovett told them goodbye. Harry thought he’d be allowed to leave in peace, but just as he threw his bag onto his shoulder, Lovett called after him.

“Mr. Potter, if you could stay behind for a moment.”

Harry glanced at his friends as they left. Ginny signaled that they would be just outside the door and he nodded, turning to walk to the Professor’s desk. Lovett gathered his notes into a neat pile and clipped them together. He pulled another packet out of a drawer and began arranging the sheets, preparing for his next class.

“What did you need, Professor?”

“I just wanted to see if you’re alright,” Lovett replied, smiling gently at Harry. “You had an outburst in class today.”

“Oh…yeah…sorry about that…er, sir.” Harry felt a blush creeping up his neck. He’d been publicly shamed by professors before but, somehow, standing in front of Professor Lovett’s kind grey eyes was more humiliating than that. “I was just…we’ve had professors before that didn’t…er…”

“You’ve had a complicated history with this subject,” Lovett said, nodding his head toward Harry’s scarred hand. “McGonagall walked me through it. I understand your suspicion. I can’t make you believe it just by saying it, but I am genuinely trying to teach this class effectively.”

“Yeah, I figured that out,” Harry muttered, staring down at his shoes. “You know…at the end of the lecture…” Lovett laughed good naturedly.

“I saw you catching on, yes. You did very well after that; thank you for participating. But I wonder…is there anything else that I should know about, Mr. Potter?”

Harry looked up, brow furrowed, to see Lovett staring up at him in earnest. Harry was worried the Professor might be trying to see into his mind and he looked down at the desk and shook his head. Lovett sighed.

“Very well. You don’t have to share anything with me that you don’t want to. Just know that as your professor and your new head of house, I’m here to help you if you need it.”

“Oh…er, alright.”

“I also won’t be taking any points away for your outburst. I would ask, though, that if you feel something similar might happen again that you step outside for a moment and return when you’re calmer. If you disagree with a point in a lesson or have a question, please speak up, but I can’t allow you to shout at me during my class. Is that understood?”

“Yes, Professor,” Harry said, turning red again.

“There’s no need to be embarrassed, Mr. Potter. It’s just a correction.”

“Yes, sir.”

“Where is your next class?” Lovett asked, taking up a quill and piece of parchment. “I’ve kept you for a while and I don’t want you to get in trouble if you’re tardy on my account. Where are you going?”

“Oh, er, nowhere,” Harry replied. “I’ve got a break.”

“Mr. and Miss Weasley? And Miss Granger?” Lovett asked as he scribbled a message. “I assume they’re waiting outside and may need excuses.”

“Oh, Ron’s off as well, but Ginny has Herbology and Hermione has Arithmancy.”

“Oh, I’ll just walk Miss Granger there then, but please be sure to give this to Miss Weasley,” Lovett said, smiling and handing Harry the note. He rose and gestured for Harry to walk with him to the door.

“Thank you, Professor,” Harry said, fiddling with the parchment. “For…er…the note.”

“Of course,” Lovett replied, setting a gentle hand on the flat of Harry’s back. “And best of luck with try outs today. I’m sure you and Demelza will build us an excellent team.”

#harry potter #fanfiction #fanfic

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thirst-days · 8 years ago

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Nasi goreng with hot dogs

thirstDays No. 11 Eat Rice Yet?

When I was a kid I was allergic to wheat and dairy. In those days, words like “gluten free” were definitely not found on all manner of food packaging or in a dedicated section of the grocery store like they are now. Being a kid, my fondness of vegetables was also limited. So I ate a lot of meat and I happened to absolutely love it. Every Halloween my Opa would give me a dried sausage that I would savour for weeks, taking it out of the fridge every day and delicately nibbling away at it. In any case, my mother had her work cut out for her when it came to getting vegetables in my mouth — even more so because dinner time was my bad temper’s golden hour.

One solution whose flavour has stuck on my tongue was nasi goreng, or “fried rice.” Being from a Dutch family on my mother’s side, Indonesian food was common, a lasting connection to the Netherland’s colonial ties with that country. An amalgam of leftovers with fried rice wrapped in a warm smoky flavour, the nasi goreng of my childhood involved cut pieces of hot dog and frozen peas. I would help my mother or watch as she moved the rice around our heavy yellow wok. Red flecks of chilli. Bright and happy green peas. A bubbling pot of wieners. My mother humming, singing and whistling as she moves about the house, opening the windows to air the smell from the kitchen.

As an adult I introduced nasi goreng to the man who is now my husband, though without the hot dogs and with a great deal more sambal, a chilli sauce that I always have on hand in our house.

Eat Rice Yet? curated by Henry Tsang and Diyan Achjadi, was tightly organized around the smells, tastes, sights and memories of food and drink. The experience of food, of sharing a meal, which has been present to varying degrees in all of the thirstDays events, was here given its full due, allowing the cross-cultural, familial, political, and spiritual nature of food to come to fruition—a rich and complex broth simmering under attentive eyes. I kept thinking about the entirety of the event as a recipe in itself, with all the flavours of sake, horchata and kimbap enriched and accented by the presentation of video, story and song. The star, of course, was rice, taking centre stage with humble grace and gravity as a meal in itself, a side dish, a carrier of delicious sauces, a container for fish and vegetables, full of potential. Each presentation of the evening enriched the appreciation of rice in itself and illuminated profound connections and separations between us. Rice was an active agent within this, a proposition for new understandings.

Michael Rakowitz’s Dar Al Sulh (Domain of Conciliation) (2013) began the evening with the words, “You know it really is a pity how we treat each other now. I know you can’t forgive me but forgive me anyhow?”1 A video document of the restaurant project that operated in Dubai for one week and served Iraqi-Jewish cuisine, Dar Al Sulh refers to a legal territory or domain in which an agreement between Muslims and non-Muslims ensures the freedom of religion, autonomy and protection for all. The project stems from Rakowitz’s ongoing Enemy Kitchen (2003-) where he teaches participants to cook recipes compiled with his Iraqi-Jewish mother, creating the conditions for a discussion of Iraqi culture in America that moves beyond media portrayals. Similarly, Dar Al Sulh presents possibilities for the representation and interaction of Iraqi and Jewish culture in the wake of Jewish exodus from Arab lands in the 1940s. Serving platters sourced from antiques dealers in Israel that survived the journey of the Iraqi Jews out of Iraq, parallel the preciousness of the cuisine served as both the recipes themselves and the Iraqi Jewish Arabic language are under threat of being lost. “You are eating a dying language from the plate of a ghost,” words adorning the window of the restaurant, remind visitors of the implications of the experience they are having despite the conviviality of it all.

Following the screening, Meeru Dhalwala, co-owner of Vij’s and Rangoli in Vancouver, gave a talk—”A Grain of Rice, a Pot of Rice”—about opening a restaurant in Seattle: Shanik. She attracted female staff who were immigrants and refugees from India, Ethiopia and Eritrea by visiting convenience stores and Walmarts and “greeting people who looked Indian,” advertising a safe place for women to work. What was immediately evident in Dhalwala’s talk was a sense of humour and honesty that comes from the practical realities of running a kitchen. She described the restaurant as a “cultural mess,” divided along ethnic lines with caucasian front-of-house staff, Indian cook staff, and Ethiopian and Eritrean cleaning staff. In rapid fire she discussed the many differences that kept these women separated: not speaking the same language, differences in religious beliefs, and dietary practices.

It was a slow and difficult process to bring these women together. The cuisines of their home countries share some common spices, so they learned the names of these in each other’s languages to break down barriers in communication. It wasn’t enough. One day, however, Dhalwala was cooking a simple rice pilaf with basmati, red bell peppers, yellow bell peppers, turmeric, cilantro, jalapeño, and toasted cumin. It was a meal that everyone in the kitchen could eat, and they enjoyed it so much that they began to sharing it around the same table, even enticing the front of house staff to join in. The conditions for conversation were set and the kitchen staff had an unexpected (at least for the audience, perhaps) moment of bonding when Dhalwala casually asked one of the staff, who was Eritrean, if she would be interested in Oguz Istif, Dhalwala’s partner in the restaurant. This sent the entire kitchen staff into a disapproving frenzy because of Istif’s Muslim heritage. Dhalwala’s frankness about this experience of bonding over a shared discrimination against another had the audience laughing together. It was totally unidealized, stemming from long seated prejudices as well as the continued conditions of separation experienced by many immigrants and refugees in the United States as well as Canada. Despite this, their distance was lessened in the simple act of sharing rice. As she spoke, we were fed small cups of rice from Vij’s and shared in the retelling of this story.

First Intermission: I drink a cup of sake and eat kimbap, a Korean seaweed rice roll (or three).

The second act began with a meditative video work by Chee Wang Ng, 108 Global Rice Bowl (2008). The object of meditation is a rotation of white rice in white bowls, varied in shape and size, and shot against a cool grey background. A pair of pine-coloured chopsticks are laid in front, creating a diagonal line that moves off to the right of the screen. The composition is carefully considered. Each well rounded mound of rice is proportionate to its vessel. With each new bowl of rice, a chime sounds—similarly varied in its tone and pitch—and a different country is inserted into the phrase “Made in _____.” China and Japan make multiple appearances along with Canada, Thailand, Vietnam, France and many others. The 108 tones correspond to the number of beads in a Buddhist rosary, aligning the path to enlightenment, or the repetition of a powerful mantra, with the simple grace of rice. The connectivity between places of vast geographical distance is also brought to bare in the repetition of this similar image and object of contemplation, speaking to the movement of bodies and goods that transcend borders.

The video brought the audience to quiet attention and, at least for me, back into my sensing body. Fred Wah’s reading then promptly whisked me away again, and the distinction between the simplicity of Wang Ng’s video and the complex and vivid imagery of Wah’s stories (and the attendant differences between watching and listening) deeply enriched the experience of both works. Wah read from Diamond Grill (1996), a semi-fictional biography about growing up in his father’s restaurant in Nelson, as well as reading some newer material. I have never read Wah’s work before and was enraptured by his descriptions that brought memory and taste so close together that the two became indistinguishable. The selections were part recipe, part biography, observing the life of the town as much as the way the hand remembers the rhythm of cooking, rhythm that Wah brought to life again in words. The final note I wrote while listening to Wah was “the palpable flavour of words.”

I sat that with over the second intermission where I tried a different kind of sake and shared a cigarette in the cold December night.

As I came back in and got another cup of sake, Vanessa Richards took the stage. A Dark Welcome Table: Songs for Grace in Action was a multimedia and layered narrative told primarily from the perspective of a young black girl of Jamaican descent living in Vancouver in the era of the Vietnam War. It was a story about wrong names: about grapes and raisins and techniques for eating rice pudding; about being chased home from school by a white kid who kicked and spit on her door; about Phillis, the young Squamish “Indian” girl, and the story of the two sisters, the mountain peaks that are called Lions even though the narrator thinks they look more like tiger ears. This was the same story told by Mohawk writer E. Pauline Johnson in Legends of Vancouver (1911)2 but inflected with the energy of a shared tale between two young friends. As Phillis explained, the Squamish “let the Haida know they weren’t mad anymore,” allowing peace to come between the two great nations, which led to the creator placing the sisters on the highest mountain range at the end of their life so that we could continue to look upon them and feel peaceful. Richards broke out into song: “heartbeat, it’s a love beat.”3

She told us about an older boy, Adam, who looked like Muhammad Ali. “No Viet Cong ever called me a nigger.” She thought that Adam might knock out that white boy just like Ali, and wondered if Adam and Ali could stop the big war. A video a Ali is projected on the wall: “I’m gunna float like a butterfly and sting like a bee. George can’t hit what his hands can’t see!”4

Finally, Richards was joined by Anna Baignoche on guitar and they sang “Children of Darkness” by Richard & Mimi Fariña (1965), standing in front of a wall drawing of the two sisters, their peaks simply outlined in black with a few m-shaped birds flying in the sky. “Now is a time for your loving dear, and a time for your company. … And now in this age of confusion, I have need for rice pudding!”

Following this enrapturing performance, Hank Williams’ “Jambalaya (On the Bayou)” came on—which is my favourite Williams’ tune—and we all gathered around a table of rice dishes: Nasi Uduk with sweet coconut, Nasi Kuning with savoury turmeric. I drank a final cup of sake, this time from the Fraser Valley where the fertile soil supports rice agriculture, and talked with Henry about my memories of eating Nasi Goreng. I left buzzing on sake and the deep warmth that the sharing of food threads throughout all of history.

Notes 1. Leonard Cohen, “Anyhow,” Old Ideas, 2012. 2. http://digital.library.upenn.edu/women/johnson/vancouver/vancouver-01.html 3. “Heartbeat, it’s a Lovebeat,” The DeFranco Family, 1973. 4. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HXzQqqn-rVc

Tarah Hogue is a curator and writer of Dutch, French and Métis ancestry originally from the Prairies. She is Curator with grunt gallery since 2014 and is the 2016 Audain Aboriginal Curatorial Fellow with the Art Gallery of Greater Victoria. She is currently working on #callresponse with Maria Hupfield and Tania Willard along with invited artists Christi Belcourt, Ursula Johnson, and Laakkuluk Williamson-Bathory. She recently curated Unsettled Sites, a group exhibition with Marian Penner Bancroft, Wanda Nanibush and Tania Willard at SFU Gallery. In 2009 she co-founded the Gam Gallery. She has written texts for Canadian Art, Decoy Magazine, Inuit Art Quarterly, MICE Magazine, and others.

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