#he knows his stuff

[livetogether--diealone]

🫶🏻 oh franco

[petrichormore]

Ghostie: “You should’ve dipped him [Dapper] in the River Styx like Achilles’ mom.”

Bad: “Yeah, but then I’d have to hold him by the ankles and he has really teeny-tiny ones. I’m afraid they’d snap off.”

[poolparty13]

Lmaoooo Sid 😭

[celestialsister0918]

@the-haunted-moth Here is “THE GIF”

@moonsnightowl

@sinsiriuslyemo

@hudson-bay-girl

[queen-mihai]

The house itself is a monster as well, normally trapping inhabitants inside for all eternity. But the second your foot crossed the threshold the first time, every room you enter just happens to be the exact room you needed, and nothing seems to ever get lost.

Once you've just started to settle into your routine, you realize you haven't been buying food, but the fridge is always stocked. While you're sitting there staring, a voice pierces the silence "may I help you, master"

You instinctively speak "I'm just not sure how the fridge keeps being f...." before you realize no one is here today

"Who are you?" You ask, for some reason wondering why you're asking when the answer seems so obvious that he's the butler.

"Kemsith, master. The butler"

How could you have forgotten Kemsith. He's been the butler here since... wait you just moved in! How does his presence here seem so obvious?

You open your mouth to say "I just moved in here and I don't have a butler. Also what's the deal with the food?"

But what comes out is "all is well, Kemsith. Excellent work."

You leave. Of course Kemsith deserves your praise. He's been a loyal and faithful friend and guardian of your house for... You Just Moved In!

You turn around to try to ask Kemsith what's going on, but he's gone. "Classic Kemsith" you chuckle to yourself "always disappearing like that"

Of course you have no further questions for such a dependable butler. He's doing fantastic work. All is normal in your house

Monster hunter reader who has no idea that they’re a monster hunter and are literally wired to attract monsters.

You find an injured dog on the side of the road and take it home and suddenly there’s a hot wolf lady sitting on your couch and insisting on thanking you for patching her up.

A bat accidentally flies into your bathroom and you call animal control. However when you open the door the bats been replaced by the palest guy you’ve ever seen who has immediate hearts in his eyes at how your first reaction is to throw the nearest object at him.

Cutting through a cemetery as a shortcut and suddenly your chin hits the ground and there’s a decomposed hand clasped around your ankle. Ever so slowly an entire person springs forth. Even with all decomposed bits you can tell they’re smiling at you in a not so platonic way.

If you step foot in the forest you can bet they’ll be at least a couple fae traps. All they want is to whisk you away to their world where you can be happy and together forever.

The ocean is also a task but far less dangerous. You’re sure to bump into a mermaid or two but instead of trying to take you to their world, they’ll try to follow you to yours. They’ll give you gifts as their way to propose and should you ever accept they’ll be bound to you and able to follow you to land.

A demon and Angel appear at your door and become a fixture in your life. Always arguing in the background about what’ll happen to your soul and who you’ll spend your eternal afterlife with.

A witch who you go to for help getting rid of the monsters but instead she gives you potions to calm your fears and anxieties. Who convinces you to give the harem a chance, they just want to love you after all.

Buying a larger house to fit all of your new companions and gaining yet another. A cynical ghost who takes great pleasure in seeing the others upset but acts like a perfect golden child around you.

Will be writing more for this because I’m in a monster mood!!

[trekkerac]

he's like a faulty lightbulb

[egophiliac]

once again, don't think I'm not still obsessing over 7-12

(eventually I will get back to being less scribbly, whoops)

[engagemythrusters]

If you are looking for other dogwhistles, The History Wizard, here on TikTok and here on Instagram, is a very good resource. He has a degree in Genocide Studies. I really recommend watching his videos.

Remember kids, Nazis don't deserve their kneecaps.

Also if any of these are incorrect pls lemme know

[koobiie]

A lone swordsman stands in the chamber. He seems... quite lost.

[academy13]

If I had a nickel for every time the Doctor has stepped on a landmine, I'd have two nickels. Which isn't a lot, but it's weird that its happened twice.

[purpleangiie]

Damian: "Grayson, what are you staring at?"

Dick: "Sh!"

Tim: "Leave him be, D. He's emotional."

Damian: "Over what?"

Dick, staring at the two quiet figures in front of them: "Would you believe that? Jason and Bruce existing in the same space and not throwing a tantrum, but actually behaving like two adults? They're even working together at the same desk. Unbelievable."

Damian: "Wait, has father just ruffled Todd's hair?"

Dick: "And he didn’t even punched him back! I'm so proud of how far they both have come. *sniff* Now we could all be one happy family."

Damiam: *looking absolutely bewildered, gazing up at Tim who just shrugs*

Tim: "Give them 15 minutes."

Damian: "12."

---

Jason: "Bruce. Bruce WHERE IS MY PEN?"

Bruce: "Y-your pen, Jason?"

Jason: "Oh my god. You don't even remember it. My pen, Bruce. My personalized red and golden Montblanc you gifted me for my 14th birthday. I left it here, where is it? You threw it away, didn't you? LIKE YOU DID WITH ANY REGARD YOU EVER HAD FOR ME AND MY FEELINGS? DID YOU FORGET I WAS YOUR SON TOO? WHY IS IT SO HARD FOR YOU TO LOVE ME?"

Dick: "Damn! We got so close."

Tim: "And that'd be 10 minutes and 35 seconds."

Damian: "-TT- Pay up, Drake."

[honeygrahambitch]

Forgot to update y'all on this one. I told him that people are asking if he is reading fanfiction and he was like: "No, I watched the entirety of Hannibal more than a few times and I have consumed enough vampire media to be able to say that vampire Hannibal is not it"

Me: I like the AU's where Hannibal is a vampire

My dad: I don't, they are making him too normal. A human who eats humans is cool, it's badass. A vampire? It's mundane. All vampires eat humans (*blows raspberry*) Not all humans eat humans, it's something else.

[lunewolf13]

Tim and Jason were munching on Batburgers mid-patrol. Entirely out of the blue Tim says: By the way, I'm bi.

Jason pauses, then swallows his burger: Uh, okay?

Tim: I just wanted to tell you. In case, you know, you think no one would accept you.

Jason: ...Huh??

Tim: Yeah, there's a reason why I brought this up. What I'm trying to tell you is that B told me to tell you that you can bring your boyfriend over for dinner whenever you want.

Jason just stares at Tim, wondering if he's experiencing a fever dream because what??

Jason: What boyfriend??

As far as he knows, there is no boyfriend. Why does Bruce think there is a boyfriend??

Tim being understanding but for a completely different context: It's okay, Hood. I'll tell him you said no. No need to deny it.

Jason continues to be baffled: Thanks. But I don't have a boyfriend.

Tim does not believe him: Sure, sure. So, when's the next time Arsenal plans to visit Gotham?

Jason goes back to eating his burger and pretending he's not totally confused by the change in topic: Uh, this Thursday. I'm gonna help him with Lian's birthday cake, and brainstorm gift ideas.

Tim: Uh-huh. Hope you have guys have fun :)

[blaqcats-fics]

been thinking about jason being petty towards bruce. like, oh, you spend time with your other kids, but not me? tire privileges revoked! it would be over stupid shit too.

like there’s one time bruce decides to take damien to the movies, and jason is just beside himself.

like the conversation would be like:

JASON: So, let me get this straight—you took Damian to a movie.

BRUCE: He asked.

JASON: Oh, and I wouldn’t have wanted to see Kung Fu Panda 4 with you?!

BRUCE: You were busy.

JASON: Busy taking down a cartel. Which, by the way, I learned from you. I deserve quality time!

BRUCE: Jason—

JASON: No. No excuses. You’ll learn.

Jason storms off. Five minutes later, an alert pops up on the Batcomputer.

BATCOMPUTER: Warning: Batmobile rear tires have been removed.

BRUCE: …Jason.

Cut to Jason outside, rolling two Batmobile tires away, cackling.

[berensreverie]

In Defiance of Death

[cozylittleartblog]

"content creator" is a corporate word.

we are artists.