#he hits pretty much every single one of my favourite writing tropes dead on and hits them WELL

[always-amity]

Shitty 15 minute doodle done on the bus today because O Superman by Laurie Anderson came on my play list and I was like "This is so Furious Core"

Also debut of my Young Furious design I guess.

[daniwib]

Hiiii 💕💕💕

For the fic never have I ever:

1) have you ever written anything about buddie and sleeping (like an insomnia fic, nightmares, cuddling and falling asleep, etc)?

2) have you ever written anything about buddie and chronic pain?

3.) have you ever written anything about buddie and hurt/comfort? What about angst?

4) have you ever written any sort of buddie AU?

-❤️🪐

Hey, hii!

(Me, holy shit, someone actually sent me an ask? Stay cool, stay cool, it’s cool everyone!)

(Also me, oh shit, I did not realise that this means I have to remember what I’ve written. Hmm. This may have been a mistake, I have the worst memory, I really do. Goes and checks out own ao3 profile for the answers…)

Ok here we go.

Nightmares. Oh hey look at that! I’ve actually got a fic with the word in its title, who knew! A spell for nightmares & fractured hearts is a short and fluffy lil fic about Buck helping Chris heal after the tsunami, and then Chris (and Eddie) helping Buck do the same. And because I’m allergic to fluff, I followed it up with part 2 in that series being long, whumpy and angsty. As for falling asleep, cuddling or insomnia, I can’t find anything in my quick search but I think I’ve written all of those in several of my fics, just not as a major part of the plot, more as part of the comfort part after the hurt usually.

Similar answer for chronic pain, I think? I’ve referenced it here and there in various fics but haven’t written on just about that. It’s a little bit too close to home for me, my dad has had 3 hip replacements (first because of major injury as a firefighter when I was 10, he fell through 3 floors in a burning building) so having lived with someone experiencing it, it doesn’t really appeal to me to write.

Buddie and hurt/comfort – um. Pretty much every single one of my Buddie fics?! I filtered my works with that tag and got 30 hits, so…. Here’s one I’m posting right now that I’m kinda proud of Pictures of You, in which Abuela dies post season 6, Eddie hurts and Buck comforts.

Buddie and angst – refer to above answer lol. If I had to choose a favourite, I think I’d choose empty, broken, lonely, hoping, my beloved presumed dead fic where Buck and Christopher are thought to have perished when Buck’s apartment building burns down and Eddie goes through several chapters of angst. It’s unrelenting really, poor guy. 4. Buddie AU – again, I’ve got several depending on your definition.

If you want a truly Alternate Universe, try I Once Was Lost. It’s a Peter Pan fusion where Buck is Peter, Eddie is Wendy Darling and almost all of the other characters feature in Neverland too. It covers from their childhood up until the end of season 5 and I have a particular soft spot in my heart for it.

If you prefer Canon Divergence, try There Walks Darkness. It’s basically What If Maddie didn’t kill Doug and he was arrested instead – and was one of the prisoners who took Buck and Eddie hostage in season 5? It features a lot of hurt Buck, Buck whump, worried Eddie and the 118, some of my favourite tropes to write.

And lastly, if you prefer supernatural AU, try Returned for a shorter read, which perhaps unsurprisingly is based on the movie and tv show… Returned.

Which reminds me of another supernatural AU that I can’t believe I forgot because I adore it! Trust Me, Darlin’ is my first collab, with the lovely @hella-cious! It's a Supernatural / 911 crossover in which Buck runs into an old hook up (Dean Winchester ofc) at a scene in LA and is promptly kidnapped before the 118’s eyes. Lots of angst and whump in this one and while there is Buck/Dean because lets face it, those two are far too hot not to ship together, it ends in Buddie (and Destiel too, for SPN fans!)

So, wow. There you go. This was a lot longer than I expected it to be but then I’ve never done one of these before. Thanks for being my first ask @steadfastsaturnsrings !!

[the-evil-duckling]

And now that Pride Month's over, Let's Talk About Pratchett.

The companies have taken down their flags. The marches and rallies are fading away. Rainbow colours are melting back into grayscale. And now that all the hubbub is dying down, let's talk about an author who did perhaps more than any other to introduce gender-and-sexual minorities to the public (and not just as a cute oddity to be cooed at from a distance, either).

Let's talk about an author whose works are perhaps the most representative, hard-hitting, and wholesome, in all of well-written English literature.

Let's talk about Pratchett.

Before we dive into the lovely little nitty-gritties, I want to just take a quick look at what Pratchett's writing really is, and what makes it so very exceptional. It's pretty simple, really.

He's funny.

That's the "secret" formula to Terry Pratchett's success across the global; he's funny everywhere, everywhen, across multiple generations and multiple decades and multiple geopolitical borders. You don't have to read Discworld with a lot of effort, thinking deeply after every line about the message the author is trying to convey. You don't have to analyze every character and every situation to see how the author is sculpting a crystal-clear mirror and holding it up to the face of Society. When I'm feeling down (cause college and life and pressure and dreams) and wanna start gouging out my forearms with my nails, I can just curl with one of my comfort books (like Men At Arms, or Unseen Academicals) and laugh and chuckle and just feel better. You can just enjoy it.

Now, I think, I can get to the fun stuff; analysing all of my favourite characters and the roles that they represent in mirroring Pratchett's view of People. (I should mention at this point that I am mainly going to be focussing on the Sam Vimes novels, and what I will be writing are my own thoughts and opinions. Anyone who knows more - or has just read/interpreted the books differently - is of course free to add their own musings.)

Fred Colon: Sergeant Colon is that rarest and yet most typical of things: Fred Colon is an ordinary person. He is no hero, or genius, or leader. He is not evil or even mildly malicious. And that is the very point that needs to be understood. People (most people) are not deliberately evil; they are, on the whole, fairly decent people who treat their friends well and try not to make enemies. It is just... petty selfishness, petty prejudices, petty apathy... all summated in every single member of the populace, and suddenly everyone knows that dwarfs are just money-grubbing bastards who'd bite your kneecaps off for a copper coin and trolls are dumber than the rocks they're made off but they'll as soon smash you to pulp as look at you and you can't trust a vampire cause they're too dead to be alive and-

Carrot Ironfoundersson: Captain Carrot is a cliché. Captain Carrot is a cliché wrapped inside a trope hidden in a Mary Sue, all turned on its head. Captain Carrot, rightful heir to the throne of Ankh, leader of all manner of beings, man who once beat Detritus in a fistfight... is not the hero of this story. In any other series, the story would have been of a brave new cop (who is also the king) standing up to the corruption and lawlessness of the Patrician while taking advice from his grizzled old half-drunk commander who dies four chapters into the first book with some vaguely portentous words that the hero remembers at the very last minute to give him the tools/strength/motivation necessary to keep fighting. But this is Pratchett. And the hero of the story, if there is one, is very much the grizzled old commander. Two other points have also always struck me about Carrot. The first is the matter of identity. Biologically, Carrot is very much a human, but in all other ways that matter he is entirely a dwarf - his name is Kzad-bhat, and even the deep-down dwarfs do not question his dwarfishness - and yet that does make him any less a human. In this is reflected the multiplicity of identity (not just of gender, which is what most people immediately jump to, but all identities). The second point is of the relationship between Carrot and Angua, which seemed to me a representation of a healthy dom/sub relationship. Unlike the twisted shit we find on ao3 (and in some published books that I don't feel that I need to name), Angua is at no point portrayed as lesser, weaker, incapable, dependent, or deferent. She is her own person, and the two of them just happen to have this kind of chemistry.

Samuel Vimes: Ahhhh. His Grace, His Excellency, The First Duke of Ankh, Blackboard Monitor Samuel Vimes, Commander of the City Watch. The protagonist, if not quite the hero, of the series. He is not perfect, not even close. He is casually discriminatory (species-ist?) and thoughtless in most of what he says. his saving graces are that his discrimination is universally applied at all beings living and dead, and that he has never, not even once, allowed his personal feelings of prejudice stand in the way of justice (which is at times, all that separates him from Fred Colon). Does that mean that it's all okay, and everything is now fine and dandy and hunky-dory? No. Not even fucking close. Words matter and actions matter and even how you feel deep inside - all of it matters. Prejudice is prejudice, and it is always wrong. there are no mitigating circumstances, no 'yes, but...' that can make it acceptable. But only an idealistic idiot would say that it is not better than the alternative. And this is the reason that Vimes is one of my favourite protagonists; he is not a hero. He is real.

Leonard of Quirm: A parody of the public perception of a genius (perhaps of Roundworld's Tesla and da Vinci), I have loved Leonard as a character ever since I realised he was gay. Allow me to elaborate. As I was recently re-reading Jingo, I noticed a line that went something like 'He started drawing how The-Going-Under-The-water-Safely-Device could be improved, piloted by a muscular man who was not overdressed'. And just like that, a couple dozen other off-hand comments slotted into place and I realized the homosexual truth. And I love this portrayal of homosexuality, because most books or movies or tv shows or fanfictions with a gay MC (or even sidekick) tend to have a storyline roughly equivalent to 'hey my name is [insert name here] and I'm GAY and I have a destiny to save the world and my family and my GAY boyfriend whom I'm dating cause I'm GAY and before I go outside I have to pick my outfit really carefully better go with salmon-rose-flutter pink cause I'm GAY and now I'm outside and I'm not very popular and this is my tragic backstory cause a lot of people don't like me cause I'm GAY and-' Yeah. This is not good writing. By barely mentioning anything, Pratchett somehow still managed to emphasise that a) homosexuality is one of your identities, not all of them and b) just because a story has a character who is gay doesn't mean that the story becomes about a character being gay.

Trev Likely: One sentence. Just one sentence. 'Hating people was too much work.'

If you actually made it this far, you are obliged to reblog. I'm sorry, but I don't make the rules. (Please?)

[whenisitenoughtrees]

Do you have any fic recommendations? I really like how you write in this fandom so if you have any of your own favourite fics or authors I'd like to see them!

sorry this too me so long lol, i was hardcore procrastinating, and then i realized that i tend to forget to save a lot of the fics i like so i had to track some stuff down. i tried to narrow down the list, but it still ended up being pretty long, so i put favorite fics under the cut

all links go to ao3!

Favorite Authors:

teacupfulofbrains is definitely among my favorites, bc both her writing style and the way she writes the characters are just so, so good. personal faves include living in the real world (ain’t it fun), lovely, dark, and deep, and her avatar au, the crossroads of our destinies

patentpending is one of those writers who you would not be surprised to hear has something published because she is just that good. i think a lot of people in the fandom know Powerless, but my favorite of hers is her recent mociet divorce-and-remarry fic Bother Me a Little Bit Longer

RandomSlasher has got some really good stuff and their fluff and h/c is always completely on point; they’re probably one of my favorite authors for virgil overall. i particularly like Starved and Snow Day, and they’ve also got a bunch of really great oneshots

peachsneakers has written literally so much fic, mostly short and sweet ficlets, but they’re all so well-written and there really is something for everyone. i’m particularly fond of their series preservation of the self for that good good dark sides angst

delimeful writes a lots of aus, mostly fantasy and/or supernatural, and there’s a lot of cute g/t stuff if you enjoy that. his fic how easy you are to need was one of the first fics i bookmarked for this fandom, and i also especially like his alien au series sit back and watch the world go by

greenninjagal is fantastic, i don’t think there’s a single fic of hers that i’ve read and not enjoyed, and i am in love with the way she writes all the sides (particularly the dark sides, but i’m a bit biased). i particularly love Deja Vu and her recent space au Space and Everything In It

Favorite Fics:

A Game of Vice, in which remus locks roman up in a tower like a stereotypical damsel in distress and everyone else goes to rescue him. i love this fic because a) everyone gets a chance to shine and b) remus is very much the antagonist but he’s still sympathetic? which i love

Self Love is just, nine chapters of emotional catharsis and thomas getting to know his sides better, and i love everything about it. i think character!thomas is criminally underused in a lot of fics, and this fic in particular has one of the best characterizations of character!thomas that i’ve ever read

The Gold of Your Heart is a roceit classic, i think, but if you like roceit and haven’t read this one yet, i would absolutely recommend it because it’s so well written and it’s also really long, which i’ve found is kind of rare in this fandom. my only reservation is that there are parts that you could interpret as being u!patton and u!virgil, but everyone has a reason for acting like they do and everything gets resolved by the end, so i was still able to enjoy it a lot even though u!sides are typically a major turn off for me

chivalry is dead has some of the best roman angst i’ve ever read-- he literally splits into his own sides, and everyone else is trying to get him back together again, and it’s just literally so fantastic. also, the endgame pairing is dlamp, which i am always weak for

That’s Just How Siblings Are is literally 10k of roman and remus-centric whump and h/c, and i am weak for creativitwins anyway but this fic really hits all the right buttons. it also features an interesting take on light vs. dark sides relations, which i really liked

Remy Sanders and a Bunch of Idiots is one that i just read recently, and i’m putting it on here for the fact that it made me care about remy? which is not to say that i don’t like remy, because i do, but when i see him in fics i’m rarely all that invested in him as a character. but this fic, hoooo boy. it’s exactly what the title says, with the added angst of remy trying to take care of all the others while being completely convinced that they hate him, and it’s just so frickin good

Falling Together is everything that i look for in a lamp fic-- it takes that trope of patton and roman and logan being together and they all want virgil to join them and virgil also wants to join them but communication issues and virgil’s low self-worth get in the way, you know, that trope? and it plays it out to absolute perfection

Tyndall Effect is one of the cutest dukeceit fics i have read in my life, just, pure fluff. it’s an urban fantasy au, deceit is cursed, and remus falls in love instantly. i literally couldn’t stop grinning the entire time i was reading

the feelings in my headspace rearranged is a wip, if that’s a deal-breaker, but it is absolutely worth the wait for new chapters. it’s centered on the idea that virgil doesn’t intrinsically have a name, and as such, canon goes differently, starting with accepting anxiety. it’s so emotional and well-written, and i love it so much

like copper and gold is loginceit, or logiroceit, or whatever the ship name is for logan x roman x janus, and it is a 30k word rollercoaster. it’s also the only explicit fic i’m including, and it definitely earns that rating, so if you don’t want smut, skip this one. but i’m putting this one on here because usually, smut holds no appeal for me, and i tend to skip smutty content in fics i otherwise enjoy, but this fic is so well written that i read every word and enjoyed it. even though the smut is such a big part of the premise of the fic, it really feels like the smut isn’t the point so much as the emotions behind it, and overall i really can’t recommend this one enough

aaaaand that’s what i’ve got! i hope something in here appeals!!

[okitanoniisan]

I saw your rankings for all the games and while I haven't finished 7 yet, my rankings would be about the same as yours :0 I do have to ask though, do you have an opinion on what games have the best substories?

0, 5 (they're what made me love Saejima, and Shinada's are pretty insane too), and Dead Souls. Kiwami's are good as well even if a lot of them are... outdated.

3 has some very good ones as well (Rikiya's specifically are like... a must-see, and the fact that so many have cutscenes is nice too). I just think that playing the original release first kind of ruined my enjoyment a bit.

Yakuza 7 has some really great ones too, I finished most of them yesterday and I was losing my shit over the giant roomba one and the public pisser one. When I beat him in a fight and it said "Added to Sujidex: Piss Wizard" I completely lost it and had to pause my stream until I stopped laughing.

I think (specifically localization-wise) 0 was at its peak with writing, and even if the story kind of dropped off for me after playing other games in the series (it's definitely not my favourite and shares a lot of common tropes with other games – K2) the substories are all just fucking incredible. Like, every single one; and Majima is an incredibly fun protagonist to watch get pulled into these weird situations. Even though I've finished most substories in each Yakuza game, 0 is the only one I've beaten Amon in.

Dead Souls' is in a unique position and absolutely goes ham with the side content. I don't know what else to say about it aside from the fact that Majima's hostess stuff is full of some of my favourite Yakuza moments, and there's a substory where Majima has to try and hide the fact that some guy is a zombie while they hold a meeting so he shoves a ball gag in his mouth.

I haven't played much of 4's substories because I just fucking hate the game (and I've heard the substories are just as edgy as the main story), 6's substories SUCKED HARD and made me really uncomfortable at times (Kiryu can hit on REALLY young girls. what the fuck.) with a few exceptions of some good substories around Hiroshima, and I didn't play Ishin's because it already took a lot from me just trying to mentally translate Ishin's main story while I was playing lol.

I feel like (for me at least) both Judgment and Y7 kind of... rely on older games' substories (both have onomichio related ones, for example), but the ones that are brand new are REALLY good.

[fcrensis]

THEMES & PREFERENCES QUESTIONNAIRE !!

aka, things i’ve always wanted to ask people / have people ask me. please remember to repost rather than reblog!  happy munday ~ !!

what types of genres do you gravitate towards ?

in general ?? horror, for sure, in any sort of media ; though my tension in writing could use some ( a hell of a lot of ) work, writing horror characters is so much FUN. i actually came to the d:bh fandom from dead by daylight, where i wrote one of the killers, “ the wraith ”. i legitimately miss writing him because he was ?? SO FUN WOW i got to portray this horrifying, monstrous being, manipulated to kill over and over and over again and all the turmoil that came with becoming a predator. my best friend also had this cool horror storyline that i made a character for. his name was gilad, and he was a youth pastor, also indoctrinated into a nasty cult with demonic beliefs and child sacrifices and fucking hell we really need to write that some day.

what types of genres do you gravitate away from ?  

uh anything historical, usually, even fantasy history like game of thrones. it just doesn’t really interest me. saying that, fantasy just plain doesn’t interest me most of the time honestly, one of my favourite books is fantasy but nothing else of it has ever really been my thing !! i’m also USUALLY not a huge fan of anything that’s too much like real life. real life plots and au’s can be fun sometimes but not all the time ; i love a good fuckin barista thread now and again but i couldn’t write it for everything.

what types of characters do you most often play / enjoy ?   

GOSH ,, my character type changes pretty often. a couple years ago i was writing a lot of heroes ( like steve rogers and peter parker, i wrote a lot of marvel characters ) but when i dipped into the DC fandom, i picked up jason todd, who is absolutely an anti-hero. and that was sort of a stepping stone for me writing the more villainous and angry, troubled characters which is sort of still where i’m at ?? so melissa and connor are SUPER challenging for me right now and it’s a lot of fun trying to balance my need to make them fucking assholes and my common sense telling me not to do that.

what types of characters do you seldom play ?    

children, i guess. i have a couple of oc’s under the age of 18 who i have barely used, and before the dead by daylight fandom i was writing ernest vega in dream daddy, but generally i’m sort of weird about writing teenagers and children because i am ,, 20 years old, i don’t know what the fuck kids are like now. i also have never in my life written a maternal character. melissa’s sort of there, but it’s these brief mentions and references and not a defining trait.

any pairing tropes you particularly enjoy ? ( e.g. opposites attract / anguished declaration of love / etc )    

UH yeah, polar opposites ??? listen, in real life, i don’t think anybody who was totally different to me personality-wise would be a good fit, but in writing ? fuck yeah. give me the rough, moody character falling madly in love with the soft one. give me two characters who should be enemies coming to the horrifying realisation that they’re developing feelings for one another. i’m all fucking for it.

any platonic tropes you particularly enjoy ?    

found family is so important to me and i would DIE for hank & connor. i’ve had a lot of found family plots with friends and i am so emotional about every single one of them, be it a sibling relationship or parental.

any antagonistic tropes you particularly enjoy ?    

listen . . . i don’t know what an antagonistic trope is so i’m going to guess and you’re gonna all pretend i’m totally right.

i guess i’m pretty into characters being manipulated and finding out they’re being manipulated, trying to come to terms with that and address what’s happening and what they’ve done and being angry at the injustice.

what are your preferred thread types ? ( novela / para / banter / etc ? )    

oh man, it really depends on my muse. i struggle to write things that are super short, so i do like at least one good sized paragraph, but i prefer to have different lengths of threads !! like, sometimes, i really want to write something long, something more around the 700-1000 word length, but i don’t want that for EVERY thread. shorter things are amazing. they’re a good respite when i don’t feel like dedicating that much energy to something. 300 words is around my usual minimum but i can go shorter !! <3

what are your favorite types of interactions ? ( fluff / angst / smut / etc ? )   

i love both fluff AND angst. what i want at the time really depends on how i’m feeling, though !! like a few days ago i was super into angst and right now i just don’t really have the muse so my angst threads are on temp hold ( except for this one i’ve owed for a week lmao ) while i focus on less violent stuff. i love my characters loving and being loved, but at the same time sometimes i just want them to suffer in some sort of way.

i don’t like smut, though. i can’t write it. i honestly don’t know why, i’ve always been really awkward about it and i feel like, you know, you can’t moderate who reads it if you post it publicly and if i DID write smut, i wouldn’t want underage people getting at it.

what’s on your wishlist ?  what sorts of threads / plots / relationships are you craving right now ?    

me : give a serious answer me to me : literally anything w gavin give me BIG BRO GABIN

i don’t have anything super specific in mind except i ,, did a few days ago want to do an angst thread with connor where something happens ( i.e. hank dies ) and he just decides that he’s done, pulls out his thirium pump and unfortunately has it put back in before shutdown. so i would be open to discussing that w somebody for in a couple days when i inevitably wanna do angst again.

for melissa i !! really just want her to open up to somebody. tell them what happened to her and why she can’t let androids in her space. i also really want an android to TRY to get in her space. befriend her, androids. please.

i also wanna write the fuckin wraith again so if anybody wants to interact w an unwilling executioner trying to hold onto the last of his humanity hit me the fuck up

tagged by . . . @isolationtender a BABE an ANGEL melissa’s fuckign gorlfriend

tagging . . . okay none of you actually have to do this totally feel free to ignore but @detidgaf @lostxdetective @hcpesalive @ethereal-myth  ( hi guys it’s deviiancies )

[silver9mm]

I was tagged (months ago?) by my best bat-friend @exaggeratedspecificity to name 15 songs that I love, and I was really inspired by her emotional stories behind her choices so I thought I’d put a little effort into mine, too. 

But the thing is, when I start thinking back to songs that mean something to me, like super personally...well, sometimes I just don’t want to remember things. I got really sick when I was 11 and now it’s systemic and chronic, and it turned me schizophrenic starting about age 16 and that lasted for another 15 years. Music, literally, kept me alive. It was my best friend, the one thing I could trust. It was how I found validation for the fucked up things I was seeing and the way I felt. It’s how I spoke to the outside world---anyone who knew me then got at least one mix-tape from me, sometimes dozens. I would take lyrics and write stories about my friends with them. I had to go home and get lyrics down on paper instead of going to parties. When I rode the train cross-country, I lugged my 300 disc CD book the whole way, clutched to my chest. I kind of want to be buried with my headphones in but I’m a little worried I’ll wake up from being dead when the battery runs out.

Anyway, in the last few years...basically since I discovered Supernatural, music has taken on a whole new meaning for me. Life in general has changed. It’s better. It’s more fun, more interesting. I’ve found a creative outlet, and especially concerning music, I’m not slathering my experiences, my insanity, my feelings of loss and isolation and paranoia and confusion all over it. I’ve learned how to step outside my little fear-bubble and enjoy music from a whole new angle. So I thought, instead of going through my 130 gigs of music and forcing myself to think about those songs that I love for personal reasons and thus scratching at emotional scars and scabs of my real life, I’d do something more fun for me and pick my 15 favourite songs that exemplify my 15 long Supernatural fics, because since I’ve been writing, my life has improved by leaps and bounds and there’s not a single traumatic memory attached to the experience.

That was really long-winded.

With You by Matt Simons: This is from the soundtrack to Sense Of Life, which is my first published fic. I’m so glad I wasn’t really ‘in the fandom’ when I wrote this, because I never would have had the guts to write it if I’d known how much most shippers don’t like OFC. I would have worried too much about Mary-Sue’ing or whatever whatever. What I wanted to write about was giving the boys something to love, and then taking it away from them, because if they aren’t hurting, what’s the point? So I gave Sam a separated-at-six-months twin sister, and Dean a sick angel, then I gave them reasons to all get naked in a room together, because little did I know, Plot Productive Porn™ would be my go-to writing device. Anyway, looming over the whole fiasco is John Winchester’s A+ parenting, which sets this story up in the first place, and I was so gleefully fulfilled when I randomly heard this song somewhere while writing the fic. I was like, yesperfect.

My job to control you, darling, though I barely know you, hoping you grow tired and start giving in. Spout of holy water pour it on my only daughter maybe there's a shot she'll begin again. So wrong

Lucky With Disease by Elbow: I think this would be Crowley’s favourite band. That said, this is one of my most favourite wincestiel songs and is perfect for Wash It Away---the first fic I wrote, and it shows. A few OOC things, but I just went with what I picked up from the light smattering of gifs that had crossed my dash---I hadn’t even seen a single episode of the show yet. My least favourite fic, but still...it’s not terrible, and I love the dynamic of hurt-angry!Dean and fixer!Sam and Cas falling somewhere in between, willing to do whatever it takes to help. I definitely stuck to the first two characterisations for the rest of my writing. 

Fell like a crippled crow Spinning through and breaking branches I'm in a bad way Call my friends, they'll know what to do

Not as handsome as my brother But I've been lucky with disease

And yes, I'm a better friend Than I've ever been a lover And that's not saying much But I'm not saying much today

Make Me Wanna Die by The Pretty Reckless: In some different timeline, all I’m doing is writing Megstiel. But Never The Same is all I’ve managed and it’s typical---crazy!Cas and caretaker!Meg, bees, honey. Okay, honey as lube and bees around quivering nethers, but that ‘oh what the fuck okay fine’ sentiment is there that I always loved so much about Meg. 

I had everything Opportunities for eternity And I could belong to the night Then your eyes Your eyes I can see in your eyes Your eyes You make me wanna die I'll never be good enough You make me wanna die

Adolescence by Brown Bird: Rise Above It is my goriest fic to-date, and the sort of weird, sinister nature of this song seems perfect for it. Another wincestiel fic in the same vein of WIA but I think I got the characters down a little better. Dean can’t stand himself and thinks he hates Castiel for caring about him, and Cas, par for the course, makes things worse trying to make it better, but Sam knows just where to dig into the bloody mess to get it all right again. 

So long adolescence of the frightened soul You're entering the ritual Lay down your every fear upon the altar child Prepare to play the man's role

Stay strong the sound of screaming's just the sacred rite Of death begetting new life

We are here but for the grace of everything divine It's the providence that we must find

If (don’t ever blame yourself) by Last Days of April: People who can write early-season wincest are my heroes, okay. Dean’s a different animal now, isn’t he? I’m not even remotely suggesting he’s better one way or the other, just that he’s harder for me to grasp in the first couple of seasons. Harder for me to find his voice, and I can’t even say I really ‘got it’ with The Dawn Breaks...because I don’t fucking remember writing this fic at all. I have no idea where it came from, but it’s dark and dirty and Sam is toeing the line of making himself into the same monster that hurt Dean in the first place, but in the end, he pulls it off.

If it is hard to bear I'll hold the weight If there are things you ain't I'll compensate But you should never blame yourself Put the blame on everybody else 'cause they don't see what I see If no one understands I'll understand

Lovers’ Eyes by Mumford and Sons: ngl, the entire soundtrack for Becoming Less Defined is my favourite song. I fucking nailed it with these songs: perfect combo, perfect order, perfect atmosphere, but this song in particular showcases my particular obsessive trope here. I’m so fucking proud of this ’verse, and I’m climbing the walls to get back to it and finish it. I can’t leave omega-tainted!Dean and Wall-crumbled!Sam and sweet, insane omega!Jensen in limbo. I mean, there’s actual Purgatory to get to, after all. 

Were we too young, our heads too strong To bear the weight of these lovers’ eyes I feel numb beneath your tongue Beneath the curse of these lovers’ eyes But do not ask the price I pay I must live with my quiet rage Tame the ghosts in my head That run wild and wish me dead

Complicated Shadows by Elvis Costello: It’s hard to get Dean alone sometimes, but this song really conjures up that early-season hero that I was talking about before, and writing Turn In Early was supposed to be just a little jerk-off fic, some imaginative Deancest, but because I’m the worst, it’s all slathered in gentle pain. 

Well you know your time has come and you're sorry for what you've done You should've never have been playing with a gun In those complicated shadows Well there's a line that you must toe And it'll soon be time to go But it's darker than you know in those complicated shadows

John’s Star by The National: A reminisce fic, Dean’s B.S., 2001 is a rare moment of self-reflection for Dean, but he’ll only go so far back. I love the idea of Stanford-era!Dean, sidelined, a captive audience, listening to music he probably would never on his own terms, and hearing lyrics that just fucking hit home. There’s nothing explicit about this fic, no overt wincest, but it’s there, especially with songs like this.

I don't ever want you to come home again I don't want to hear your call, your voice in my room I am divine, my arms are stronger than rivers And when you feel that way, you want to feel that way again Forever

Once ruined, baby you stay ruined

Evidence by Faith No More: The sleaze that undercurrents all of Mike Patton’s music is perfect for Dress Me Down, a jealous!Jensen J2/Genevieve blackmail fic, because you can just hear Jensen lying to himself through the music. 

If you want to open the hole Just put your head down and go Step beside the piece of the circumstance You got to wash away the taste of evidence Wash it away Evidence, evidence, evidence Got to taste evidence I didn't feel a thing It didn't mean a thing Look in the eye and testify I didn't feel a thing Anything you say, you know you're guilty Hands above your head and you won't even feel me You won't feel me

Sedated by Hozier: I would normally pick Great Expectations by Elbow for this, but the dangerous, powerful carelessness of this song fits Something To Share just as well. Schizophrenic, self-destructive and self-harming!Sam and totally out of his depth!Dean make deals and promises to each other and I just really, really love this fic okay leave me alone I’m fine. 

You and I nursing on a poison that never stung Our teeth and lungs are lined with the scum of it Somewhere for this, death and guns We are deaf, we are numb Free and young and we can feel none of it Something isn't right, babe I keep catching little words but the meaning's thin I'm somewhere outside my life, babe I keep scratching but somehow I can't get in So we're slaves to any semblance of touch Lord we should quit but we love it too much

Knock Me Out by Linda Perry: Back to my a/b/o ’verse with Between Two Minds, and we find poor Dean, omega-tainted and feeling like he can’t be loved, finally, finally starting to trust his little brother again.

You knocked me out You bit my lip You held me down and kept me sober Through all this time With no regret I guess that's just the way I liked it Maybe, when I'm free I'll realize all he really wanted To share all the peace Something I never wanted So wait, don't go Seems as though it's getting scary So please, don't you go

Feels Like by Buck 65: A song no one will listen to for a fic that no one reads. Dreamy, plinking piano for a fic that started out as a dream. My favourite artist with my favourite ending I’ve ever written. Give Buck and A Steep Fall a chance.

She found the lost boy, eyes that are crying closes Glad to be unhappy, boy gives her dying roses Ecstatic agony and nights of arousing glories Hungry hearts and hands that tell ten thousand stories Open wounds and the one word that filed under Her endless eyes have known hardship and wild wonder Kisses that cure and moments that cured the kiss Under a spell and maybe there's no words for this

I Drove All Night by Roy Orbison: The Mixtape Thing wasn’t supposed to be a fic, but I had to talk about why the songs were picked for the prompt ‘date night at the MoL Bunker’, and suddenly there was a sweet little wincest fic. Yeah, ‘sweet’. My fans were very surprised too. 

What in this world Keeps us from falling apart No matter where I go I hear The beating of our one heart I think about you When the night is cold and dark No one can move me The way that you do Nothing erases this feeling between me and you

Tell Me by Moby ft. Cold Specks: An alternative ending to BLD, But Then Again is the best thing I’ve written so far. J2/wincest/abo and so fucking full of angst and longing and good goddamn is it dirty. I’m so proud of it and myself for pulling it off, and even if I lose two more friends over it (i’m not bitter i’m very bitter), it’s still wonderful in my mind. 

Didn't have the heat I gave you memories Come deeper please I got nowhere to stay tonight Won't you make me stay? Keep your clear eyes on the prize And as I'm there Bring me to your knees

Baby Blue by Wolf Parade: Kill The Lights is the one unfinished fic on this list but I’m so close it counts. Fifty-nine songs to choose from. Five playlists. Over 100,000 words, and choosing one song to represent this brutal MCD fic is easy. Since it’s written from Sam’s POV, some of my favourite songs are the ones I imagine from Dean’s, and this is perfect. 

You're like a fool on fire To the water so blue I will come undone And I will run to you Sometimes we are an open flower Sometimes we are an open wound Sometimes we are a kind of echo chamber, wherein You're all fire and brimstone And I'm all that, too Burning blue for you

LISTEN

tagging @zmediaoutlet @omgbubblesomg @theboringprincess @chiisana-sukima @hazeldomain @indigoneutrino @dreamsfromthebunker  @bruisedmickey and anyone else who wants to do this (and if you’ve already done it, no worries ;) 

[ciathyzareposts]

What’s Your Story – Mr. Sack

Answers: Mr. Sack Introduction and Captions: TBD

And today, we have somebody who sent in their What’s Your Story answers before commenting on the blog. It’s time to welcome the self-described “long time fan, first time caller,” Mr. Sack!

My home country is… USA! USA! USA! Heh, sorry. I’m not jingoistic, but I couldn’t resist.

My age is… 40, but I still feel 23…not physically, but mentally. I remember turning 23, graduating college, 5 years into legal adulthood, expecting to be a full-time adult and yet not knowing if I was ready for that privilege or responsibility. It seemed like I was faking it and everyone else had it together. Now that I’m 40, with a wife, two kids, and a job that isn’t exactly dead-end but isn’t exactly fulfilling, I realize everyone is pretty much faking it; I still feel young and irresponsible, but at least I’m better at faking it.

The first adventure game I played was… Leisure Suit Larry in the Land of the Lounge Lizards…when I was 8 years old. My dad brought home his work computer for my little brother and me to play the casino games and exploring the virtual world (making sure we didn’t wander off into the dirty parts…not that we would even understand it). Years later when we got our own computer, I tracked down just about every available Sierra game both old and new. I ended up playing all the Leisure Suit Larry games before ever having a girlfriend. In a way, the games helped to shaped my attitude towards sex and masculinity (both are HILARIOUS), and taught me to respect women, to see them as people with their own needs and desires that should be fulfilled before I get what I want (and sometimes I don’t get what I want, but I make the best of it).

I’m surprised you can get past the title screen without finding some dirty parts!

My favourite adventure game is… really hard to pick. Growing up, I almost exclusively played Sierra games both out of ignorance for any other quality games from other companies and satisfaction from their catalogue. When I discovered LucasArts games, the whole world opened up and it amazes me I managed to do anything as a kid other than play these games. At one point, I would have said King’s Quest VI was my favorite, though it is my favorite of that series. Leisure Suit Larry 3 is the perfect balance between a real adventure game and Larry’s comedy trope of dating and societal mockery and the best of that series. For a time, Gabriel Knight: Sins of the Fathers could not be dethroned because of its dark story and incredible style. Space Quest V is criminally underrated among that series and I’m surprised it doesn’t get more love. Really, the golden age of adventure gaming, from King’s Quest I to Grim Fandango, those games are the games I remember so fondly.

As for my “gun to the head” answer, when I think of the game that I enjoyed from beginning to end, that was the perfect blend of hilarious sharp writing, visually pleasing, and just plain all around fun, it’s probably Sam & Max Hit the Road. I loved that game so much, it made me a fan of the Steve Purcell comics and visual style. While I enjoyed the Telltale series, the Lucasarts entry is just so good and I lament we never got to experience the cancelled sequel.

A lot of people with guns to their heads pick Sam & Max – I wonder why?

When I’m not playing games I like to… keep myself entertained. I watch movies and online videos like The Spoony Experiment, read books, comics, blogs, cereal boxes, anything that stimulates my mind. Boredom is my worst enemy. Having two young kids has helped me rediscover playing with toys.

I like my games in (a box, digital format)… young me would have said box with all the trimmings of manuals that seemed like they came straight from the game and devices that either served as copy protection or simply cosmetic dressing…but now that I’m older and space is limited, plus having games easily portable on my phone and my Nintendo Switch, I’ve no problem with digital format. In fact, having replayed classics like Day of the Tentacle and Full Throttle on my iPad, not to mention so many new adventure games from Wadjet, Zojoi, and the new Leisure Suit Larry game, I want every single adventure game past, present, and future available on my digital platforms of choice.

Unavowed from Wadjet Eye Games – available now on most digital platforms!

The thing I miss about old games is… the risks of experimental games by big studios. Sierra and Lucasarts brought out some incredible pieces of work in their glory days before they went seriously corporate and eventually disbanded. Even other companies like Capcom were much better when we got games like Darkstalkers, ones that developed cult followings and had real character. With games having blockbuster-sized budgets and a need to recoup such high production costs, they tend to play it so safe and formulaic, especially with things that, for their time, would have been considered bold. Also, I miss the sense that I had so much time to play them all. Becoming an adult has really made me aware of time and responsibilities that must be fulfilled before I can do anything else, and that usually leaves me with little time for gaming.

The best thing about modern games is… the stigma of gaming being for nerds who don’t leave their parents’ basements is gone…for the most part. There are games for everyone, and despite what blogs on both sides of the political spectrum say, we can all unite over our love for them, regardless of genres and flaws. It baffles me that there are those who seem to want to dictate what gaming is, who believe games on phones are not “real games”, or that games from the past are terrible due to either gaming conventions of the time or the lack of inclusion and pandering to the “old guard”. Gaming shouldn’t be so divisive. Preferences in genres will be there, but it’s our differences in preferences that should bring us all together. Also, I love the indie gaming scene that allows for blockbuster games from the big studios and small, experimental pieces from everyone else.

The one TV show I never miss is… Mystery Science Theater 3000, no question. My all-time favorite television show. It pretty much shaped my sense of humor and outlook on life. While it’s never quite managed to evolve past being a cult show (albeit one that has a lot of big name fans and the idea of a bad film being “MST3K-worthy” is parlance I am glad to see), its influence is undeniable in this era of online cynicism and critique. Whether that’s good or bad is up to each person’s interpretation, but for me, the world can take itself way too seriously, and sometimes I just want to hear the riffs of a guy trapped in space with two sarcastic robots. I’ve said that, in the era of DVD commentary tracks, every film, regardless of quality, should have a mandatory MST3K track, complete with silhouettes (the Ghostbusters DVD had this, so it’s possible).

Unfortunately, the MST3K revival was recently cancelled after Season 2

If I could see any band live it would be… Gorillaz, just to see how they pull it off.

My favourite movie is… The World’s End. When I bought it on Blu-Ray, I probably watched it at least once a day for half a year, making it easily my most-watched movie. The dialogue is so sharp (no surprise if you’ve ever watched any other Edgar Wright production) and the fight scenes so impressive, and yet most people mark this as inferior to Shaun of the Dead and Hot Fuzz, which baffles me; those two films set the bar very high, for sure, but The World’s End matched it. But again, that’s a gun to my head choice (though a much easier one to declare than my favorite game), I’ve grown up watching movies from all eras, and I’m always up for watching a good (or bad) movie with friends, no matter how many times I see it. In fact, the best way to experience a film I’ve already seen is with someone who hasn’t.

If this is the guy with a gun to your head, I think he was hoping for a different World’s End movie

One interesting thing about me is… I joined a local community theater just to be in a production of Avenue Q, and that pretty much opened up a whole new world of interest for me, allowing me to fulfill an acting bug I never knew I had.

source http://reposts.ciathyza.com/whats-your-story-mr-sack/