#he doesn’t actually but I think he does
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luveline · 11 hours ago
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Hey lovely !! <3 could we see Spencer’s bombshell! Reader going into labour at the BAU but trying to downplay it like Pam did on the office !! (So sorry if you’ve already done a request like this) <333 have a lovely day ☺️
thank you <3 pregnant!reader, 1.3k
“Spencer?” 
Spencer groans into his pillow. 
Your hand slips onto his stomach. “Spencer, can you wake up?” 
“No,” he mumbles, lifting his head off of one of the many pillows of your bed. He thought his bed at his apartment was comfortable, but Spencer has never slept so well as he does in your new bed, in your new home, with you warming the sheets beside him. What a miracle to live with you, the rush to get everything done before your due date complete. 
You make a strange noise, hard to see in the dark as he opens his eyes. “What’s wrong?” he asks. 
You struggle into a sitting position. Angel, he thinks sympathetically, you’re fit to burst, your baby bump as big as it’s going to get and awfully heavy. He sits up with you, putting his hand behind your back. “Baby?” he prompts. 
“I think,” —you sound meek, not yourself, each word said reluctantly— “that I’m having real contractions.” 
Spencer’s head isn’t working. He takes a few seconds to hear you, and then another few to realise what you’ve said. “Are you sure?” 
“They’re really painful.” 
Braxton Hicks (which you’ve had, and not enjoyed) aren’t usually really painful. They’re also irregular. “How many have you had? Has it been long?” he asks. 
“Maybe five. They’re like…” You take his hand. “They’re like, they go on for ages. I’ve never felt anything like it.” 
“So you’re in labour,” he says, grasping your hand back. “Definitely. Let me get my watch, I need to time your contractions. Are you okay?” 
“Oh, no,” you say, shaking your head. “I’m not in labour. I’m going in to labour.”  
“It’s the same thing,” he says. He has boxes and boxes of mental knowledge explaining the difference, but he’s too excited to catch your strange tone. “I’ll be right back.” 
He races from the bed to the bathroom where he’d left his watch. You should be having contractions far apart at this point, around fifteen to twenty minute gaps, but it could be much further or far sooner, and Spencer doesn’t know when you had your last. He needs to time them properly so he knows when to take you to the hospital. 
“Good thing we packed your bag yesterday morning, huh?” he asks, sliding back into bed with a huge smile on his face. “And you showered last night, you’re ready to go. I have all our things in the trunk, but Morgan’s gonna have to come and do the car seat, I forgot all about it.” 
You shake your head again. 
He worries it’s from pain. “Is it starting?” 
“No, no, I’m not having any. I think it’s just cramps, actually.” 
“What?” He puts his hand on your bump. “That’s what they feel like, honey, it’s cramps, it’s your cervix contracting, it feels just like a cramp.” 
“No, I don’t think so.” 
Spencer cups your cheek, his fingertips sliding softly to the corner of your eye, his thumb by your nose. You look younger without any makeup on, younger still with your creeping frown. “Hey,” he says, his voice half breath, hoping you’ll look him in the eye, “hey, what’s going on?” 
Your eyebrows start to pinch down. “It’s not labour.” 
“Is something wrong?” 
“I’m not having her.” 
“She had to come out some time,” he says, attempting to be funny and lighten the mood. 
“I really think it’s fine. I’m just having those Braxton Hicks again, it’s too far from my due date–”
“Angel, it’s a week away. We knew it could happen now.” He strokes your cheek again. “We don’t have to go yet. Let me time a couple of your contractions and see what we’re working with.” 
“It’s not…” You duck your head. The catch of pain gets you, and Spencer checks his watch. Four minutes past four in the morning, the longest hand at five seconds. Then he looks for your hand again to hold in his, his own panic backseated by your denial. “They’re not that bad,” you say stiffly. 
“That’s good, honey, but they’re going to get worse. Remember what we said, huh? The pain will get really bad, but there’s nothing to be afraid of. We have a plan.” 
“It’s not real.” 
“Baby,” he says, tugging your hand imploringly to his chest, his voice having descended to a place it so rarely goes, “what are you scared of?” 
“That I can’t do it,” you say. 
“Is your contraction over?” he asks, noticing the laxening of your fingers. 
“Yeah.”
He’s silent for a few seconds. 
“Is there anything in the entire world that you can’t do?” 
You sniff. 
“Seriously. I can’t name a single thing you can’t do. This isn’t different. It’s going to be scary and painful, and it’s not something I want for you, not really, but you’re about to have a baby.” He rubs your thumb, ducking his head in the hopes that the movement will make you raise your own. “Our baby. We’ve waited such a long time.” 
“Nine months.” 
“Thirty nine weeks and two days. That's two hundred and seventy five days waiting. This is a good thing,” he says, meeting your eyes the moment you raise your head. “The waiting is over. This is the fun part.”
“‘Cos our girl is coming,” you say. 
He grins. “Exactly! I know you’re scared, but thinking you can’t do it? Of course you can. And I’m gonna be with you the whole time.” 
“You promise?”
“Of course I do.” 
You wipe your eyes with the backs of your hands. Spencer lets his palm fall onto your thigh. It really is going to hurt. It’s gonna be pain like you’ve never felt before, and he’s terrified of everything that could go wrong, but what’s important now is making sure you know you’re going to be alright. 
“You’re going to be a beautiful mom,” he says, rubbing your thigh, softer from time spent resting. “I’m so excited I can’t describe it. This time, the day after tomorrow, we could be here with her. We’ll be putting her down to sleep in the nursery in her newborn onesie we picked out, the–”
“Little rabbits,” you say, the hint of a smile on your lips. 
“I can’t wait to see her face.” 
“Her little fingers.” 
“Her nose, her eyes–”
“You said babies have their moms hands.” 
He smiles. “I have my mom’s. Can you imagine? And we get to find out today.” 
You let him touch your stomach. “I know what you’re doing.”
“You always do.” 
“I’m so scared.” 
“Sweetheart, let me be the scared one.” 
“You’re not gonna dilate ten centimetres!” 
“You’ve probably already done one,” he says. “Just nine more to go.” 
His joke doesn’t land. To his horror, you end up sniffling and locked up with panic. He rubs your back in long sweeps, feeling younger than ever kneeling in bed at your side, minutes droning on. He’s pulling your head into his neck thinking he’s completely out of your depth when you say, “It’s starting again, Spence.” 
He checks his watch. “That’s eleven minutes.” 
Your contractions will get worse soon, and closer together. You probably don’t have long until it starts, and labour might go on for hours. To do this, you're going to have to believe That you can. 
Spencer takes your face into his hands and looks you right in the eyes. “You can do this. I know you can.” He pecks you gently. “Angel, if anyone in the world can do this, it’s you.” 
You take a deep breath. He watches your nerves turn to determination, turn to love. “I know.” 
“Is there anything you need me to do before we start getting ready to leave?” 
You give a soft smile. “Kiss for luck?” 
He’s gonna need it. 
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pedriscroquettes · 1 day ago
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𝐋𝐀𝐒 𝐕𝐄𝐆𝐀𝐒 ꕥ MAX VERSTAPPEN
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summary. celebrating max’s 4th title was not in your plans.
warnings. piastri!reader, max is kinda obsessed with reader, public s3x (?), unprotected pinv, fingering, just straight up dirty.
gabri speaks! i’ve been thinking about mexico gp max and las vegas sealed the deal for me.
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THERE’S A BRIEF moment of silence, of anticipation, and of complete confusion. The DJ had paused the setlist less than an hour in announcing there was a special guest appearance. Then as if on cue tonight’s race is plastered on the giant screen behind him and the words, “Max Verstappen,” echo throughout the nightclub. You resist the urge to roll your eyes knowing someone might be recording you, or your brother at least.
“I thought he was flying back?” You cover your mouth with your hand as you talk with your brother.
“I thought so too.” Your brother hums in your ear trying to hide his annoyed tone. Your brother got along with Max just fine but all he wanted was one night without F1 getting mentioned.
You on the other hand…
You’d only been in the paddock a handful of times but every race weekend you had managed to have the worst encounter with the dutch man. The first time had been incidentally, you faintly recall the energy drink splashing all over your new dress. You knew from the get go that it had been an accident but when Max didn’t as so much as a muster a quick sorry and instead went on his way you had no choice but to hate him.
“He’s such a dick.” You murmur to yourself unaware your brother catches your words.
“Be nice.” Oscar motions towards the countless people recording him.
“I’m gonna get another drink.” You sigh.
The music resumes and you find yourself into a crowd of dancing couples. Your short orange dress sticks to you as you walk towards the bar. It’d been a long night with your brother not getting the result he hoped for. The post race recap inside the garage had been brutal as well. You had watched as the championship slipped from Lando’s hands and Max claimed victory once again. It had been the worst two hours of your life to say the least. You’re way too frustrated to even notice the man approaching you. In a split second you’re covered in something that smelled similar to…
“Asshole.” You mumble.
“Mini Piastri?” He gasps dramatically. “Why are you here? I wouldn’t think you’d be celebrating after tonight.”
“Well, the world doesn’t revolve around you.” You scoff. “Does it Max?”
“I’d argue that it does actually. Considering your mood, you’d be happier if your little boyfriend had actually managed to have a good race.” He taunts you.
“Look, can you get out of my way? I have to go clean up the mess you made.” You point towards the huge spots of alcohol on your dress.
You don’t even wait for him to respond before pushing past him, brushing shoulders in the process, to head straight to the bathroom. You do your best to dodge those who already have had a bit too much to drink, unaware that the dutchman is right behind you. It’s not until you’re opening the door and notice it takes a minute too long to close that you turn around and spot him. His white dress shirt is already half unbuttoned while his hair is a mess. You stare at him incredulously as he leaned against the sink.
“Max, you can’t be in here.” You state bluntly.
“I don’t recall you telling Lando to piss off when he followed you into the bathroom in Austin.” He counters.
“How do- What?” You’re taken aback by his words. How did he know?
He ignores your question choosing to walk towards you instead. You’re now face to face with the man that had taken away your team’s championship. His eye bags are dark and you can tell it’s been a while since he’s gotten a good needed break. His tousled hair falls perfectly on his head and by the way his arms flex you can tell he’s been putting extra effort into them at the gym. All of a sudden you’re nervous to be under his glare.
“Does your brother know what you and Lando do in secret?” He questions.
“You should leave.” You try to sound confident but your faltering voice exposes you.
Max just smirks at your words knowing he was getting under your skin. He still recalls the first time he ran into you, when he spilled half a can of red bull on you. He doesn’t know why he didn’t apologize but when he saw the anger in your face he realized why. You had looked so beautiful that day with the short orange sundress that did nothing to hide your cleavage. He still remembers the disappointment he felt when he saw you and Lando walk out of the restroom all disheveled. So, when he beat Lando tonight he felt absolutely no remorse.
His lips ghost yours for what feels like an eternity. You’re frozen in place wondering how his lips would taste against yours. Maybe it was the alcohol or the way his arms flex around you but suddenly you needed to know what he felt like. His arm tentatively grazes yours as it sneaks down to your knees. A gasp finds itself leaving your lips as your legs spread open instinctively. He wants to make fun of you, of the way you melt under him so easily, but he knows better. He can’t risk ruining the moment. It’s when Max inches his fingers closer to your thighs that you suddenly realize what’s happening. In a matter of seconds you push him off you and head out the door.
You’re barely four steps out when Max yanks you back and you hit his built chest. This time he doesn’t hesitate and grabs your jaw pulling your face towards his. Your lips meet in a heated kiss as his arms find their way around your waist. This time you’re the one that moves his hands from your wait to your ass. The confidence was beginning to build up and soon enough you’re tugging on his hair as his tongue enters your mouth.
“Max…” You moan and somehow it becomes the indicator that you want this. That you want him.
He pushes you flat against the cold brick of the hallway, the dimmed lights helping hide your bodies from the crowd. You’re lucky he holds you up because your legs feel like jello and if he lets go you might lose your balance. His hands roam your waist, back, and neck before he moves your hair out of the way. His lips leave a trail of wet kisses around your neck as his hands work their way down to your legs. They slowly glide up until he’s playing with the hem of your short dress. You can already feel his growing erection press against your ass.
“Tell me to stop and I will.” He groans against your ear.
You really want to tell him to fuck off but your body reacts differently. You’re shocked when instead of telling him to call it a night all you murmur is keep going. In a matter of seconds your dress is being pulled up towards your waist. You can’t help the whine that escapes your lips as he rubs your aching core through your panties.
“So wet already.” He groans. “For me or Lando?”
“Shut up.” You still find it in you to annoy him.
To your surprise he doesn’t hit you with another remark. Max had been an asshole to you long enough. Now, that you were in front of him practically falling apart he didn’t want to ruin the moment. There’s a brief moment of silence before his hand carefully moves your panties to the side exposing your core to the cool breeze. Your legs spread instinctively as his fingers tempt your folds. His fingers collect your slick as he explores you, the wet sound making him groan against you. Slowly, he brings one of his fingers to your hole entering it carefully.
“Fuck.” He moans against your ear as your cunt wraps tightly around his finger.
“Ma- Max. So close.” You’re barely able to say.
You let out a loud whine as he curls his finger inside of you leading to your climax. You come around his fingers as you coat them with your wetness. His fingers slowly move toward your mouth and you don’t hesitate as you take them into your mouth, tasting yourself. He almost comes undone as you lick his fingers seductively. Aggressively he grabs your jaw and kisses you. He groans as he tastes you.
You feel the tip of him first as he runs it up and down your folds teasing you. Your hands are weak against the wall as his tip approaches your aching hole. He enters you slowly, holding you tightly in the process. He stops halfway through not wanting to hurt you but when he hears your dirty moans he continues. Your nails dig tightly into his arms as he fills you up completely. He’s quite big and the new sensation has you spiraling trying your best to not fall against him. He takes advantage of your weakness and attacks your neck again making sure to leave love bites around your collarbone.
“Fuck, Max. You’re so big.” You whine without thinking.
You feel his dick twitch inside you at that. Your voice has him in a trance as he tries his best to not just start thrusting inside of you. It’s not until you start pushing your ass against him that he almost pulls out fully before thrusting back into you. His hands grip your ass tightly—surely leaving marks for tomorrow—as your cunt squeezes him. He’s never felt such a thrill, at least since Abu Dhabi, you were your own feeling. He couldn’t believe you had finally opened up to him in many ways you were way better than winning another trophy. Many curses escape your lips as he finds the perfect pace inside of you.
He manages to bend you over leading to the perfect position and somehow he’s even deeper inside of you. He grips your hair into a makeshift ponytail as he speeds up inside of you. His hand trails back to your cunt and slowly he starts playing with your folds. The feeling of his cock inside of you and fingers rubbing your folds is intense and you find a camisole feeling in your stomach approach you. You squeeze him tightly as his dick hits the right spot and you find yourself coming undone. You’ve never had an orgasm so intense in your life you don’t even notice how you coat his dick with your wetness.
Max isn’t far behind and speeds up at the feeling of your cunt squeezing him tightly. Your nails dig behind you at the overstimulation and stretch of his cock. Max hisses at the sensation finding it the tipping point. It’s not long before you feel his dick twitch inside of you and in a matter of seconds you feel him spill his seed inside of you. He grunts as he empties himself and as he pulls out. He pulls you up adjusting your dress in the process.
You bite your lip as he zips up his pants. The aftermath of your little rendezvous is different. Usually with others you don’t stay long enough to watch them dress themselves. But then you notice Max struggling with the buttons on his dress shirt and you find your hands on his chest again. You only button half of the shirt before stepping back. Neither of you say a word but the silence manages to speak for you both. You decide it’s time to go back but before you can take a step Max pulls you in for a final kiss before he leaves.
You’re barely able to walk back towards the VIP lounge and stumble multiple times in the process. You try your best to brush your hair down and fix your dress as you come closer to your brother’s booth. You sit down carefully unaware your brother is staring at you wide eyed and wondering why it took you almost an hour to get a drink. You shift awkwardly in your seat as Lily begins telling you both about her mixup at the airport. You turn around briefly as she goes into detail when you notice Max walking past your table. You keep your composure not wanting to expose your actions of the night but you should’ve known better. Oscar almost bursts out laughing at Max’s completely unbuttoned shirt.
“Lando’s gonna be pissed.” Your brother smirks.
“How do-” Did everyone know? “Oh, fuck off.”
The night progresses with your brother ordering countless bottles of Dom Pérignon. It’s almost five in the morning when Max takes the stage again with the DJ playing a remix of Super Max. As if on cue someone hands him a bottle of champagne and it doesn’t take long for him to start spraying it amongst those on the dance floor. You watch attentively as his chest shows the marks you left completely unaware of how your phone buzzes for the hundredth time that night.
9 missed calls from Lan
Lan: Tonight was shit.
Lan: Come over?
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salty-autistic-writer · 2 days ago
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Buck sits on a hospital bed and looks down at his bandaged hands. Mild burns. They add to the considerable amount of smoke inhalation that makes his throat feel as dry as sandpaper. At least his coughing already got better. Buck's doctor assured him he would be able to leave soon. Too bad there's no home he can return to. 
He stares at his hands and feels … numb. It happened so fast. So fast, it almost seems like a dream. But it’s real. And everything still smells like smoke.
His loft. It’s gone.
In the middle of the night, flames consumed the walls in that scary astonishing speed he’s so well familiar with. And he couldn't stop it.
So many memories. Burnt down to ash. Buried underneath rubble. Gone.
A light knock at the doorframe makes him perk up. Buck expects to see Maddie who left to get some water and a snack. Or Chimney. Or Hen. Or Bobby. But it’s neither one of them.
“Tommy?” Buck looks up, too surprised to prepare himself for the pain he feels when he actually sees Tommy. For the first time in weeks. “What … what are you doing here?”
“I … Howie called me,” Tommy says, avoiding direct eye contact.
“Of course he did,” Buck mutters, looking back down at his hands, picking at a loose thread. Chimney. The ever-hopeful matchmaker.
Tommy clears his throat. “Are you okay?”
Buck flinches. The soft tone with which those words are spoken feels like a punch to his gut.
Are you okay? 
Okay. 
Anger wells up inside Buck’s tight chest like dark ice water, rising to the surface of his mind and fading out all the sadness. Buck glares up at Tommy. “Seriously? That’s what you’re asking about? After weeks of silence. Of nothing. You dare to show up here just like that and ask if I’m okay?!”
It’s Tommy’s turn to wince, his eyes widening slightly. “I’m sorry.”
Somehow, that only makes Buck even angrier. He knows it’s true. Honest. He knows that Tommy cares. And he kind of wishes Tommy wouldn’t. But here they are. Still care about each other way too much.
Tiredness creeps into the murky combination of anger and sadness.
“It burnt,” Buck says quietly.
“What?” Tommy asks.
“My scrapbook. It burnt. All the pictures too. The pictures I put on the fridge. And now I have nothing left.” Buck can feel the tears coming. He doesn’t want them. Doesn’t want to cry in front of Tommy. “All the memories I started to collect. They’re gone.”
I used to look at them. I used to remember the time when I thought I was finally on my way to happiness.  
“It’s all gone,” Buck breathes. And then he really cries.
An ugly sob that escapes his lips. And he hates it. Hates it so much. But he has no energy left to hide.
“Evan,” Tommy says, barely audible. And even though the sadness is suffocating him, Buck has the space for a relieved sigh. Not Buck. Still Even. And it still sounds so right … How does it sound so right after all the wrong directions their path took?
The bed dips as Tommy sits down beside Buck, hesitantly putting a hand on his heaving back. “It’s not all gone,” Tommy says.
Buck wipes at his burning eyes. “It’s not?” He asks, doubtfully.
“No. I … I’ve been collecting memories too. I can share them with you. If you want them,” Tommy says.
“That would be great,” Buck admits, trying to take a deep breath through his stuffed nose with a grimace. “Because … Because they really make me happy. The memories.”
“They do?” Tommy asks, his hand still on Buck’s back, but apparently not daring to move. “Don’t they make you … angry?”
“Not really. Sometimes they make me a little sad. Because I start to think of what could have been,” Buck says. “I start to picture all the happy memories the future might have given me.”
“But you don’t know if those memories would have been happy. What if … What if that future turns out to be so painful that you end up wishing you wouldn’t have lived through it in the first place?” Tommy asks, his voice strained. “Aren’t you scared of what you can’t know?”
Buck shakes his head. “No. I can’t live like that. The future isn’t set in stone. And as long as I think the memories I want to make are worth fighting for … Things will be alright.”
We would have been alright.  
Tommy’s hand is burning him. But when it retreats, Buck almost tells him to put it back. Maybe that’s pathetic. But he can’t find the energy to care.
Tommy is silent for a long moment. He seems lost in his own thoughts, his fingers rubbing over his jean-cladded knees in rhythmic movements.
Buck glances at him. Through a blur of his lingering tears, he suddenly realizes that Tommy looks … rough. 
His edges are sharper. The lines on his face seem deeper. There are shadows under his eyes and he’s close to growing a beard. 
And maybe that’s pathetic too, but Buck suddenly wants to hope that Tommy is feeling that same ache Buck has been feeling for such a long time now. The ache that forces him to bake. To keep his hands busy and his mind empty.
He wonders. What is Tommy doing to soothe his ache?
Buck almost asks.
But before he can, Tommy gets up. He clears his throat. “Are you staying with Maddie and Howie?”
“Yeah,” Buck says quietly. “For now. I guess.”
Tommy nods. He’s chewing on his lower lip. Lingers. Seems like there’s something else he wants to say.
And the silence stretches like a rubber band. The tension is almost palpable in the room.
Finally, Tommy says, “If I would text you in a few days. Would you read it? Would you read it all?”
“I would,” Buck says, remembering the bubbles. “I promise,” he adds.
Tommy exhales shakily. “Okay. Alright. I’m truly sorry, Evan. For the loft. And for what you lost. I can't change what happened. I can’t give the past back to you. But whatever happens, whatever you do after you read what I am going to write, I will give you everything I have. So that you can start a new collection.”
“Thank you,” Buck says, his throat tightening.
Tommy nods. He starts to walk out of the room with slow heavy steps.
Before he can disappear, Buck works up the courage to say, “Tommy. Wait.”
Tommy stops, glancing back at Buck.
“Are … are you okay?” Buck asks.
Tommy’s brows furrow with surprise, but then his eyes soften. “Honestly? No. And I haven’t been in a long time. But I am finding ways to keep the hope alive,” he says. “Goodbye, Evan. Rest well.”
And then he really leaves.
Buck stares into the void and the ache is back. But the pain has a note of hope in its bite. Maybe it’s the same kind of hope Tommy was talking about. And maybe he shouldn’t allow himself to feel it. But he can’t help it.
Apparently, his heart, even though covered in the ash the night left behind, is still convinced that the future he pictured is worth fighting for.
(AO3 Link)
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wonderjanga · 2 days ago
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Possession
The Gods including Solomon possess Billy whenever they feel like it. They try to not do it that often, but sometimes just can’t help it.
Batman and Question: *talking about an intellectual topic*
Marvel: *possessed by Solomon, somehow seamlessly joins the conversation*
Batman, Question, Marvel: *all yapping*
Question: *pauses and slowly looks over to Marvel* “When did you join this conversation?”
Marvel: “Like a couple minutes ago.”
Question: “Huh.”
Batman: “You normally never add to these conversations.”
Marvel: “That’s because I normally never care for them.” *shrugs* “But this one is actually interesting.” *is about to stroke his beard only to remember Billy’s Marvel form doesn’t have one* “Anyways-” *goes back to yapping about the topic*
Batman and Question: *look at each other before shrugging and also going back to yapping*
or
Marvel: *possessed by Hercules and walking to the lion exhibit in a zoo*
Billy: “HERCULES NO-”
Marvel: *hops on the railing of the exhibit* “It’s no Nemean Lion but it’ll do.”
or
Robin!Damian: *on a couch at the Titan’s Tower, watching TV*
Marvel: *possessed by Atlas who uses Marvel as a way to take a quick nap since he’s literally been holding up the heavens for like a thousand years, does not notice Damian and just lets himself fall on the couch, passing tf out*
Robin!Damian: *feels the weight of an eight foot tall unit of a man on his legs* “WHA-“ *tries to push him off* “YOU IMBECILE! GET OFF!?”
Damian was stuck like that for four hours.
or
Marvel: *possessed by Zeus* “It’s been a while since I’ve let loose! MUAHAHAHA! *spamming throwing lightning at Captain Nazi*
Captain Nazi: *in a crater literally getting his heart restarted and stopped*
Fawcitizens: “😨” *cause Marvel just did an evil laugh*
or
Marvel: *possessed by Achilles, chilling on the ground, making a spear with a branch and a stone he found*
Fawcitizens: *taking tons of pictures because they love their hero*
Marvel: “Alright!” *stands up with his complete spear*
Purse Snatcher: *steals a purse* “You can’t catch me!”
Marvel: *throws the dang spear, misses by a hair, and impales it in a wall so hard, the concrete is cracked* “Huh… I guess I’m rusty. I’ll need to work on my throwing skills.”
Purse Snatcher: *walks over and hands Marvel the purse* “I am extremely sorry for the grievance I have just committed. Please forgive me as I am ready to renter society as a humble human being.” *walks off*
or
Marvel: *possessed by Mercury, grabs a bunch of poker chips he won* “Man, you guys all suck.” *playing poker with mobsters disguised with a fake mustache, sunglasses, a Hawaiian shirt, and some sandals*
Mobster: “Oh that’s it!” *stands up, pulls out a gun and puts it to Marvel’s head*
Marvel: “Whaaaaat? I would never.” *is in fact cheating using magic*
Mobster: “We’ll see about that!” *pulls trigger and bullet just falls flat on the table*
Marvel: “You know, that is so not nice. You don’t shoot a man in the face if you think they’re cheating.” *stands up to make that eight feet and five inches of height apparent to everyone in the room* “You owe me 10 million in emotional reparations.”
He was just joking around. He didn’t actually need nor want 10 mil. Though, they did get 5 mil which was donated to a homeless shelter Billy knew was good.
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demonic0angel · 8 hours ago
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Things that happened at Thanksgiving today, but I make it DPxDC
Damian: … Richard? What are you doing?
Dick: *standing on the lawn and staring into the distance* I’ve been watching Danny try and struggle to park for the past fifteen minutes.
Damian: Oh. *also stops to watch* Have you seen Danielle and Jasmine come in?
Dick: Tbh, no. I’ve been watching Danny this entire time. And oh— oh! He stopped. Ooh, he turned around. He’s leaving. Damn, he gave up entirely and decided to park on the grass. Oh, he ran over Alfred’s bushes.
Damian:
Dick:
Damian: He won’t make it past the gates without Alfred sniping him.
Dick: Damn, you’re right.
————
Damian: *after Jason did something* what do you think you’re doing, Todd?
Jason: Lol, your mom
Damian: Actually, my mom only used you for her own goals. In fact, your mom abandoned you. Twice.
Jason:
Dick: Now, Damian, that’s not—
Damian: People who have had their mothers die in front of them should not speak.
Dick:
Damian: *pointing at Tim* And you! You may have had two parents at one point, but they definitely don’t consider you as their child! That’s why you had to stay with your neighbors so long! You’re an inconvenience!
Tim:
Stephanie: Hey now—
Damian: I don’t even want to hear you. Does your mother know you go out and fight crime? Does she even care?
Stephanie:
Damian: *looking at Cass* You too, Cassandra! But mommy issues wouldn’t be the least of your problems with your daddy issues as well!
Cass:
Damian: *turning around to Danny* And I didn’t forget about you, Fenton! No wonder you fit right in, your abandonment issues, raging teenage angst, and appearance makes you just at home, doesn’t it?!
Danny:
Tim: …. What about Jazz?
Jazz: *who’s been silent the entire time*
Damian:
Jazz:
Everybody else:
Damian: No, she’s a guest here. Why would I do that?
————
Dani: Pfft— Tim, Tim, can I— *can’t breathe from laughing too hard* can I touch your hair? It just looks so soft! *still laughing*
Tim: …?
Jazz and Danny: *also laughing their guts out*
Dani: *tries to reach for Tim but she keeps laughing and can’t focus on asking him* Your hair looks so soft— keheheh! C-Can I touch it??
Dani: *eventually swipes her finger under Tim’s nose and falls off of her chair from cackling so loud*
Tim: …..
Jason: *also bursting out in laughter* YOUR FACE!! BWAHAHAHAH
*Dani then proceeded to do this four more separate times with other people*
————
Dick: You know how Harley is back together with the Joker?
Dan: Yeah?
Dick: He cheated on Harley again.
Danny: *whirling around, flabbergasted* HUH?!
————
Dick: *carrying several bottles* Alright! Time for alcohol!
Jazz: Uhhh, Dick? Damian is right there—
Dick: He’s getting drunk tonight too!!
Everyone: ????
Damian: Yes! Alcoholism! *takes a plastic cup and takes a big gulp*
Dan: *looking at the bottle* This says sparkling apple cider?
Dick: Shhhh, just watch the show.
————
*dramatic screaming from other room*
Bruce: ….? What’s that?
Dick: Is that Jason? He sounds like he’s in pain
Bruce: *standing up* is he okay? Does he need help? Should I go and help him?! What’s happening—
Tim: Jason is playing ping pong with Dan and Danny. And losing really badly while Jazz is watching.
Bruce:
Dick:
Tim:
Bruce: oh.
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mossyscavern · 2 days ago
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Not spies, just a bit incompetent
Part 2
_________________________
“… what?”
Bee squeaked, breaking the silence before tapping soundwave’s shoulder pad to whisper in his audible. “What is starscream talking about?” He asked, the blue bot turned and whispered back. “Conclusion: We believed you’ve possibly been captured.”
Soundwave answered, as starscream gave his speech to both the high guard and prisoners.
“… no, i wasn’t captured, they found me. I lived in sub-level 50 back at Iacon.” He told the mech, shrugging his shoulder pads before kicking his peds back and forth.
“Question: who had ‘found’ you?” Soundwave asked and bee pointed to both the blue helmed mech with the red chassis and the silver mech. “They did before we found the map and got our T-cog’s from alpha trion.”
… this concerned Soundwave to the point he scanned bee’s electrical impulses. Every word he said is true.. even the T-cog part is true. “Primus what had sentinel done to you?” Shockwave chimed in, just as concerned as Soundwave.
All before starscream had yelled. “Hey! What are you doing?!” Starscream yelled. ‘Aww, we missed the whole speech.’ Bee thought, pouting.
Then it changed to concern, seeing that D-16 is the one that stood up. “Doing what you’re not.” He first says, turning to the winged mech.
“I’m going out there to make an actual difference. I found out that Sentinel is rotten and I’m going to make him pay, today!” D-16 yelled, fury on his faceplate. “You think you can just insult me and walk away?”
Starscream questions, walking up close to the silver mech. “Nobody leaves unless I say so.” He threatens, invading his space. “Is that so?” D laughs mirthlessly, licking his denta.
“Well how can you say that? With my head in your teeth.”
He says, rearing back and knock his helm full force into Starscream’s. The winged mech stumbles, caught off guard as sparks fly. “Dee!” He hears Orion scream, but doesn’t pay much mind to it, he has optics on his opponent.
Starscream was about to fly kick right at D-16’s head, but the mech caught it, resulting a face full of plasma from the heel Strut.
It was all happening too fast for bee, that and the amount of times soundwave tries to shield bee from the violence, but bee has to see if D is alright. From the looks of it he was about to lose..
Everything became quiet when bee finally struggles out of soundwave’s arms, looks up and saw that D has the upper hand, and he looks… terrifying, scary even, with that huge canon pressed against starscream’s face on his forearm…
“Dee!” Bee shouts, desperate. D-16 stopped, his features softened and he looked up, blue meeting orange.. were they orange?
Immediately he let starscream go, went and knelt down, arms stretched out to bee. Shockwave stepped forward before being stopped by Soundwave, letting the young spark approach and the silver mech hug. “You ok bee?” He asks.
“Uh huh, but… that was really scary.” Bee mumbled, burying his helm in D’s chassis. “it’s okay.. it’s okay.” He says, hugging bee tight to ground both of them.. but mostly himself, he needed this.. both of them needed this.
Before anything, he asks bee to go back to Orion and elita and cover his audibles. Once he does the tasks he shouts to the high guard, loud and clear.
“Bear witness! This is the only time I show mercy to those who play king of thrones! Decide now: You can stay here in hiding, bowing before your pathetic leader, or follow me as we march to Iacon and take down sentinel! Once and for all!”
The high guard cheered, chanting his name loudly. Orion stares back at his friend, the voices and chanting fades in quiet as he stares more.
He turned back to bee audibles still covered like how d-16 instructed.
Orion felt like he was about to loose D… but bee had kept him grounded.. sparkling’s keep them grounded.. it’s a reason to fight for.
The distant chanting didn’t last very long as there was a sudden explosion and laserfire. “Bee hold on!” Orion yells, transforms into vehicle form to get bee to safety.
They can make it! They have to make it…
_________________________
Ok, part 2 is done. It’s a bit sloppy but, eh.. I just wanted it to be finished.
So yeah.. part 2 is done! Forever. And for those who hadn’t seen part 1 yet, don’t worry I’ll just direct you to it.
(Prev) <- it’s here, right there… I hope you all enjoy. If uh… you want to hear the aftermath? Go here -> (aftermath) @yuukirita drew/wrote it best… I’m sorry.
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ropebunnykant · 16 hours ago
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god i genuinely cannot stop thinking about the fact that fadel got told TWICE this episode that he doesn’t have a heart.
fadel, who rationalizes the fact that he’s a killer by telling his brother they only kill bad people, the people that are actually hurting others, the ones that deserve it. fadel, who believes you shouldn’t drive even after one beer because what if you hurt someone? fadel, whose immediate response to getting knocked into at the market is to apologize and get down on the ground to help pick up the mess he didn’t even make. fadel, who can’t possibly refuse to let the guy that’s been annoying him for days on end help him take his groceries home because it’d be rude to the market lady. fadel, who would do anything for his baby brother - would kill, die, and live for him.
and it’s like. god it had to have hurt hearing that from bison. style, he barely knows, but bison basically is his heart. he literally tells bison he doesn’t need anyone else when he has him, everything he does is to protect bison, and then bison throws it back in his face and says he has a cold, dead thing in his chest.
and style, style says it after the scene in the sauna, despite the fact that he is basically pulling fadel’s heart out of his chest and making him stare at it. he’s holding fadel’s heart in his hands and saying it doesn’t exist. like!!!! LIKE!!!!!!!
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michellesneptune · 2 days ago
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HOW THE MOON SIGNS ACT WHEN THEY LOVE YOU pt. 1
disclaimer: forgive me if the series doesn’t cover all twelve signs, but i don’t think i’ve known enough people to speak about everyone’s way of loving. please be patient🤗
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aries moon/1H
ooooh those little devils🔥😈 you can see the mischievous twinkle in their eyes. they’re children of Ares - the god of war! when they speak of their loved ones it feels as though they’re ready to kill for them any minute, only waiting for the right (or any😂) reason.
(just my observation, please don’t come at me) i believe that these natives are prone to being more loyal, less selfish and flaky than aries venus. aries is known to be 'the baby' of the zodiac, valuing independence and self-fulfilment greatly. however, i’ve noticed aries moons to be devoted af!! you will never catch them bad mouthing a friend or a partner.
also, from my experience, both placements like to fight, however aries venus often does it for own enjoyment, the initial chase turns them on. as for aries moons, they’re more steady. they would go to great lengths for friends and partners. you can call them in the middle of the night and ask the craziest favor, they WILL come and help.
(please keep in mind that i mean unevolved aries venuses that still have a lesson or two to learn!)
PS. they love to be treated like the center of your world, please give them attention💕
taurus moon/2H
hmmmm how do i put it… 😍😍😍😍😍😍😍! i will say that i am biased bc my boyfriend is one and the way he’s attentive, always asks about the details of my day, pays attention to my routines and shows love through acts of service🥹 you’ve probably heard the rumours and they’re true. taurus moons make the best cooks ever. and i don’t mean putting together a couple of cheap pancakes, nuh uh. their sharp senses only let them buy the best quality ingredients and cook with great care. bonus points if they prepare a dish that they know is your favourite!
i will say though, they are not the most verbal lovers. but when they’re in, they mean it. when they say they love you, it becomes a fact so obvious that they don’t feel the need to repeat it over and over. they like to settle into a routine, so don’t expect them to be flaky, send mixed signals and stir things up just to feel something/for fun (sag moons cough cough😅😅).
they also seem brutal sometimes. but i believe it’s because they see honesty as the highest form of trust. they want to feel comfortable with you. they value silence, too. they’re the type to show you their appreciation not by telling you how perfect you are but by actually putting in the work to show you your value and show that they’re worthy of being by your side.
lastly, their homes are their sanctuaries, a reflection of their feelings. usually beautiful and they look for someone worthy of letting in, to match their belongings. they get a rep for being possessive and stubborn, nevertheless with the right person they can make a sacrifice and at least try to change their ways😂😂
virgo moon/6H
okay so i know they’re said to be critical, demanding, neurotic etc but hear me out. virgo is a mutable sign, ruled by mercury and in true mutable fashion they DO get wild, fun and unhinged lol. as a virgo moon myself i am well aware of the fact that i often act like i’ve got a stick up my ass. but when i get closer to you i want it all: karaoke nights, fast car rides, spontaneous trips! sometimes i even take those things to the extreme!
they’re also said to have the highest standards. and while i imagine it’s partly true, i believe that this placement is all about accepting the biggest, weirdest quirks of your s/o (as well as 6th house synastry!).
besides, i think that we get more so insecure and self-critical in relationships, analyzing the f outta our partners, wondering whether we’re meeting their demands! we’re about the overall quality of the partnership and just want it to be perfect🥺 we’re also quite anxious and require lots of reassurance.
lastly, everyone knows it: virgo moons are like the final boss of small acts of service lol. vacuuming your flat, folding your clothes. they notice the smallest things that could improve your life and happily do them for you!
capricorn moon/10H
this one is tricky. they remind me a bit of taurus but more rough in a sense that they probably won’t pamper you with luxurious baths and gourmet food but they will do things like pay your rent, get you a job or buy a car😂. i’ve noticed them to be a bit grumpy sometimes, definitely not the softest lovers.
they’re up to giving some tough love. pushing you into a scary path that they know will be rewarding in the end. teaching you that even in the hardest lessons of saturn there is light. they’re not the most cheerful on a daily basis but - surprisingly- they are the ones that keep calm in the face of crises. they’re like okay we can’t do anything about it now let’s appreciate what we do have and focus on what we can change.
it’s because they know all to well how karma is. they had to learn it the hard way which made them so strong and resilient.
what i’ve personally noticed: they will stick by your side no. matter. what. this isn’t always a good thing as sometimes it’s best to walk away but if you’re expecting a cap moon to give up on you, don’t.
i also feel like they’re used to being the oldest sibling, the mom friend etc. please take care of them from time to time!
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that is all i have for you! thank you for reading💕 i wish all of you lots and lots of love💋 see ya
~Michelle
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skzdust · 2 days ago
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Ateez Snapshots: Calling them Daddy
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All suggestive. Minors DNI.
Anon request here! Daddy is usually not my fav but these were actually a lot of fun. My fav is Wooyoung's :) Enjoy!
Summary: Reader, who is friends with each member, calls them "daddy" out of the blue... they respond in a variety of ways.
Pairing: Ateez x reader
Includes: coffee dates, amusement park dates, study dates, video games, bar dates, dinner with a friend, writing a song, and touching yourself during a movie
Word count: 1.8k
Taglist (Comment on a post/send an ask if you'd like to be added): @weirdowithaphone, @caught-in-the-afterglow, @palindrome969, @skzstan12345, @katsukis1wife,
@hyunjinsjeans, @somethingkindazainy, @silverstarburst
Network:@mirohs-aurora-society
Reblogs, likes, comments all appreciated!!!
Masterlist
-----
Hongjoong:
You and Hongjoong are having coffee, and your mind starts to wander.
Hongjoong is sipping his usual iced butterscotch latte with almond milk, caramel cold foam, and cinnamon sprinkled on top, and you have your usual order. You’re staring into your drink.
Hongjoong is your best friend, but you can’t stop thinking of him naked, pushing into you with a groan.
“Hongjoong… Daddy…” You’d whisper at the feeling, at him bottoming out inside you.
“Huh?” You look up, and Hongjoong’s flushed red.
“What?” You’re confused.
“Did you just… um… call me….”
Your eyes go wide as you realize. “Did I say that aloud?”
“Um… yes, you did.” Hongjoong is looking at you, waiting for you to respond. He’s all red, his fingers tapping against his cup, slightly biting his lip.
You want him so bad.
“Hongjoong…” You murmur. “I was just…” You sigh, unsure of what to say.
“Do you want to call me that?”
“Yeah, I do.”
“Then… ah, do you want to…” Hongjoong looks so nervous you laugh. “Don’t laugh at me!”
“I’m not laughing at you, I’m laughing cause you look adorable…” You lean in. “Daddy.”
Hongjoong groans. “Don’t say that in public. It’s gonna make me… ugh.”
“Kim Hongjoong, does ‘daddy’ turn you on?” You raise your eyebrows.
“Maybe.” He smiles.
“Then maybe we should go back to my place.”
Hongjoong’s eyes light up. “Yes, we should.”
-----
Seonghwa:
You and Seonghwa are at the amusement park, and your mind starts to wander.
You’re on the biggest roller coaster in the park, climbing up the first hill. Seonghwa’s hand is warm around yours, holding it tightly. You should be nervous about the drop ahead, but you can’t stop thinking about those hands, about what they could do to you.
Seonghwa squeezes, and you smile at him. “Thanks for holding my hand, daddy.”
“Daddy?” Seonghwa looks shocked, but before you can say anything, the car is toppling over the slope of the roller coaster, and you’re screaming, squeezing his hand even tighter.
Your stomach is in knots from more than just the coaster as it slows to a stop at the end of the track, and as you pull into the unloading area, Seonghwa doesn’t let go of your hand.
“Did you call me daddy?”
“I… um, yeah…”
Seonghwa smiles, a glint of mischief in his eye. “You know, if you want to call me daddy and scream, we could do something other than another roller coaster.”
You smile. “Are you serious?”
Seonghwa’s eyes dart over you. “Yeah, I’m serious.”
-----
Yunho:
You and Yunho are studying together, and your mind starts to wander.
Both of you are in a chemistry class together, and you just can’t get the calculations quite down. As Yunho’s showing you one for the third time, you can’t stop thinking about him fucking you on that table. You’re in one of the most private study rooms in the library, so it’s unlikely anyone would find you…
“And then you carry the one… got it?”
“Got it… daddy.” You whisper the last word.
“Daddy?” Yunho repeats.
“Yeah.”
He tilts your chin up so you meet his eyes, and your stomach jumps. “Did you mean that?”
“I did.”
“Fuck.” He says softly, his eyes roaming over your face. “You’re so beautiful, I’ve always thought that, but I didn’t think you… wanted…”
“Wanted you to dominate me?” You say boldly.
“Yeah.” Yunho smiles. “But now that I know… we’re gonna have fun, aren’t we?”
-----
Yeosang:
You and Yeosang are playing video games, and your mind starts to wander.
Well, Yeosang is playing League, and you’re laying on his bed and watching him. Your best friend isn’t very good, but it’s fun to heckle him as he plays.
He finishes his game and tosses his controller on the table. “I swear, that was not reflective of my skills.”
“Sure.” You laugh. “Whatever you say.”
“Oh, come on.” He spins around in his chair to face you.
“What did you want me to say? Yes, daddy, lose that game harder!” You say, joking, but Yeosang goes deep red, quickly looking away.
“Don’t say that.” He mumbles.
“Kang Yeosang, do you have a daddy kink?” Your eyes widen, and you grin.
“No!” He protests.
“You totally do, daddy.”
He puts his face in his hands. “Shut up.” His words don’t have any bite.
“Fuck me, daddy!” You whine. “Harder.”
“Seriously, shut up.” He looks at you. “If you keep talking like that, I’ll start to think you’re serious.”
“Well, maybe I am.” You say, your stomach jumping. Would that make things weird?
He blinks. “Seriously?”
“Yes… daddy.” You smile, shy.
“Fuck.” He whispers. “I love it when you say that, y/n.”
-----
San:
You and San are at a bar, and your mind starts to wander.
He takes another drink of his beer. “You look distracted, what’s up? Weird day at work or something?”
You shake yourself out of it. “Yeah, exactly that.”
“What happened?”
I was thinking about you fucking me all day and I couldn’t focus on my project, but I did have some fun fantasies about calling you daddy, so that was good. You think. “I was just really spacey today, I don’t know. Couldn’t focus on anything.”
“Really?”
“Yes, daddy.” You say without thinking.
San laughs. “Daddy? Where’d that come from?”
Your face goes hot. “I— um—”
“Be honest, baby.” He lifts his eyebrows. “Where’d that come from?”
San calling you “baby” lights a fire in your stomach. “I’ve been thinking about it a little bit.”
“Thinking about… calling me daddy?”
“Yes.” You look down.
“Hey. Look at me.” San says gently.
You look at him. His expression is full of compassion and maybe something a bit darker. “You can call me daddy if you want. And if you want me to fuck you, just say so.”
“I want you to fuck me.” You whisper.
“Okay, then let me finish this beer and we’ll go back to my place.” San takes another long swig from the bottle, nodding at your glass. “Finish your drink, and we’ll go, baby.”
You smile. You drink your wine as quickly as you can.
-----
Mingi:
You and Mingi are having dinner, and your mind starts to wander.
It’s just hamburgers from your favorite local place. You’ve gotten takeout and you’re sitting at the dining table in Mingi’s apartment.
But it feels like more than that.
“Did anything exciting happen today?” He asks, taking a bite.
“Um… not really.” You say, smiling, images of Mingi’s hand around your throat filling your head. “Nothing too interesting.”
“Whatever you say, sunflower.” You blush at the nickname. It’s your favorite flower, and it’s his special nickname for you. “But your little grin says otherwise.”
“What do you mean?”
“What really happened today?” Mingi raises his eyebrows.
“I was just… thinking.”
“About a guy?” He pokes.
You take a breath. You’ve been in love with Mingi for so long now, you may as well go for it. “About you.”
“Me?” He looks surprised. “I don’t get it.”
“I tink about you all the time, Mingi.” It comes spilling out. “You bending me over my desk, you pinning me against the wall, kissing me… all that kind of thing… daddy.” You whisper the last word.
“Daddy?” He whispers back.
You squeeze your eyes shut. “Yeah…”
“Call me that again, sunflower.”
You open your eyes. He’s looking at you intensely, his eyes burning with a fire you’ve never seen. “Call me daddy.”
“Daddy… will you fuck me?” You whimper, putting it all on the line.
“Shit.” Mingi says softly. “I’ve been wanting you to ask for so long. Yeah, daddy’ll take care of you.”
-----
Wooyoung:
You and Wooyoung are working on a song, and your mind starts to wander.
You usually don’t write sexy music, but the melody Wooyoung has built with the guitar combined with the riff you’ve composed on your bass has an undeniable seductiveness to it. Heavy, like a heartbeat, but somewhat risky, too. Wooyoung’s got an effects pedal plugged into his guitar that’s making it even hotter.
And you’re thinking about his fingers deep inside you as you play the bass line you’ve got down practically by heart at this point.
“That sounds really good, y/n!” Wooyoung says loudly over your playing.
“Thanks, daddy!” You say back, and then stop playing as you realize what you’ve just said, staring at him for any reaction.
“Daddy?” Wooyoung laughs. “Damn, you’re really getting into the… mood of the song, aren’t you?”
“I am.” You laugh nervously, hoping he’ll dismiss it at that.
But he takes a step closer. “Didn’t know you had a thing for ‘daddy’. I’ll have to keep that in mind.” He taps the tip of your nose, winks, and turns around to pick up his guitar again.
You feel hot all over. “What do you mean keep that in mind?”
“I just mean it’s good to know what you’re into. You know, in case you want to fuck.” He slings the guitar strap over his head, facing away from you, but you can hear the smile in his voice.
“In case— what?” You sputter.
“Oh, c’mon, I’ve noticed.” He smirks. “You stare at my fingers a lot when I’m playing. You want them inside you.”
“I— I mean, maybe.” You exhale.
“I’m up for it if you are.” He starts playing the chorus to the song, looking down at his guitar, and you notice the blush on his cheeks.
You smile. Wooyoung’s just as down bad as you are.
-----
Jongho:
You and Jongho are watching a movie, and your mind starts to wander.
Jongho kissing you, pushing you down into the couch, making you his.
You sneak a glance at him. He’s watching the fight scene contentedly, sticking a piece of popcorn in his mouth. He doesn’t even notice you looking.
You carefully slip one hand under the blanket on your lap.
And then you slide it under your sweatpants.
You close your eyes for a second. It feels so good to touch yourself after how worked up you’ve made yourself thinking about him. You know it’s wrong to touch yourself thinking about your best friend, much less when said best friend is sitting next to you, but you can’t stop yourself now.
“Fuck, Jongho, daddy.” You whisper, the words bubbling up on your tongue before you can stop them.
“Did you just…” The movie pauses, and you open your eyes to see Jongho looking at you, blinking.
“Oh, I was just— um—” You search for words, but you can’t find any.
He grabs the blanket and pulls it off, revealing your hand down your pants. You snatch it out and he takes it, licking your fingers and making hard eye contact with you.
You shiver. You hadn’t been expecting that.
“Beautiful girl.” He whispers. “Were you touching yourself thinking about me?”
“Maybe.” You whisper back. “I… maybe.”
“You should’ve just asked me to do it for you.” He licks again. “I would’ve said yes.”
“Can you do it for me?” You breathe.
His eyes glint. “Sure thing, baby.”
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jupiterliketheplanet · 16 hours ago
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Bruce quest fic idea where Tim manages to convince Jason that Bruce is alive and they go to find him together, but in a fucked up family road trip kind of way. I’m talking Jason “are we there yet” Todd and Tim “stop looking through my window” Drake, petty sibling arguments about the things that don’t matter (who has aux, who’s driving, etc.), sprinkled in moments of them learning more about each other, and the events of Red Robin happening with the both of them. Art theft? Jason thinks it’s hilarious. Widower attack? Tim actively bleeding out makes him realize he doesn’t actually want him dead anymore, most of his anger is directed towards Bruce now. Working with the LOA? Tim better have a fucking plan because Jason is two seconds away from killing Ra’s himself. Tim and Jason fuel each other’s questionable morals. When Tim blows up the League he does it without telling Jason and Jason has a whole “wtf” moment.
And the aftermath of everything when they manage to get Bruce back? The rest of the family notices how close they are now, and that their fighting is more like siblings shitting on each other than genuine anger, and start asking questions about what really happened while they were out of Gotham.
Idek, I think it could be a cool concept to explore
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postm0rt3m · 11 hours ago
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happy thanksgiving everyone!
just a lil fluff thanksgiving bf!simon post bcz i just sobbed my heart out over the most absolutely devastatingly beautiful angst story i’ve ever read (through statics, give it a read!) and if i keep thinking about it i’m going to actually spiral
not proofread so :P
(i said this then made myself cry again writing this bffr. this also ended up way longer than i meant for it to so lol!)
“simon?”
“…baby?”
“simon theodore! are you even listening to-“
simon suddenly snaps back out of his thoughts at the stern tone in your voice, letting out a small grunt as if saying “yes i was” but in reality.. he wasn’t. he was too far gone in his absolutely harrowing thoughts, because today is the day.
the day he’s having thanksgiving dinner with your family. i repeat, simon “ghost” riley is currently on his way to eat turkey and stuffing and pumpkin pie with his girlfriend’s family. sound the alarms!
don’t get me wrong, he’s met some of your family before. your parents, your siblings. but.. your entire family is going to be here. moms side, dads side, aunts, uncles, grandparents, cousins. oh god.
this man has been through war and back. literally. yet, he feels as anxious as he did the first day he joined the army, just thinking about the events that are about to go down. he’s literally trembling. terrified to lift his hands from the death grip he has on the steering wheel because he knows you’ll get that same teasing sympathetic look on your face as you always do.
he finally clears his throat, breaking his deadpan stare out the windshield to glance over at you for a moment, which brings him a little comfort. just the sight of you, really, could relax every tense muscle in his body.
“yeah, yeah, ‘m listenin’. said sumn about.. ham..?”
you look over when you feel his gaze on his, that same smile he was just trying to prevent spreading across your face. holding back a laugh from the random mention of ham, you place your left hand on his meaty thigh, giving it a soft squeeze.
“…no. are you okay? i promise they’re gonna love you, si. seriously.”
you know, of course, about your boyfriend’s past. his alcoholic of a father, the absence of his mother, the way he buried himself with work and an early grave in an attempt to forget it all. every time you think about it, your heart squeezes. because his pain is your pain, and it hurts you so deeply its as if it happened to you. plus, your man doesn’t deserve all that weight on his shoulders!
so, you’re kind. loving. forgiving. you never hold his mistakes over his head, knowing it happened so many times in his childhood. you’ve been together not even a year, yet, you know. you know he’s the one that you’ll marry, the one who’s children you’ll have running around your big white suburban house. and he knows it too. which is why he agreed to this!
he gives another grunt after he mulls over your question, because, really, is he okay? he’s not sure himself, at this point.
“i.. ‘m fine. lets just get this over with.”
once you actually arrive, you’re.. not sure if simon is still breathing in his seat. neither is he. his hands are still placed firmly on the steering wheel and his feet on the pedals, even though he already turned the car off. five minutes ago.
“baby. take a deep breath in,”
you begin, your smile falling as you realize he’s actually terrified. this is probably the first thanksgiving dinner he’s ever been to. and with his future family? he just wants the world to open up and swallow him whole already.
but, he obliges, taking a sharp inhale in, holding it, then letting it out when you say. it actually does relax his muscles a little, but not his nerves. no, they’re so far gone he thinks they won’t be relaxed for the next five years.
“then out. you’re okay. everything will be okay. i promise, they’ll love you. worst case scenario, we leave and get chinese.”
he looks over at you, his gaze still as intense as ever, but you can see the utter fear and nerves swirling around behind his brown eyes. you let out a small sigh, leaning over the center console to place a soft kiss on his stubbly cheek.
“lets go in. we can come back out if its too much, okay?”
he nods, swallowing so hard he thinks he might’ve swallowed his own tongue. his grip on the steering wheel finally releases as he exits the car, the crisp november air instantly hitting his face and the white t-shirt & blue jeans that took him two hours to pick out.
he rounds the front of the black pickup truck, opening your door and taking your hand as you slide down out of the passenger seat.
as you two walk up to the front door of your mother and father’s home, his grip on your hand tightens more and more with each step. you place another reassuring peck on his arm, which loosens it just a little. just a little.
you make it to the front door, and oh my god simon thinks he’s going to pass out. he’s trying to keep it together, but staring through the foggy glass of the door, seeing the bustling of your family inside, he thinks he might hurl.
“oh — you must be the famous simon we hear so much about! her mom never shuts up about you!”
one of your aunts opens the door, a beaming smile spread across her face as she sees you, then cranes her neck up to look at your brute of a boyfriend. you can see the shock on her face for a split second, although she doesn’t dwell on it. but simon does.
why did she look at me like that? do i have something on my face? bloody hell, i’m gonna throw up everywhere and she’s gonna leave me and-
you cut simon out of his thoughts with a reassuring squeeze to his hand, glancing from him to your aunt. she reaches her hand out, and simon hesitantly meets it, giving it a gentle yet firm shake.
“we’re glad to be here! simon is excited to meet everyone, right, love?”
“yeah. can’t wait.”
you two make your way through the lively house, and simon can’t help but think about how.. domestic it all is.
your siblings and cousins all running around, playing together and weaving in and out of the various rooms. your mom, aunts, and grandmothers gathered in the kitchen, preparing the food and gossiping about their respective partners. your dad, uncles and grandpas laughing heartily over beers and nachos as they watch the ongoing baseball game on the tv.
its something simon has never had the pleasure of experiencing in real life, and something he never thought he’d get to experience.. ever. the reality hits him, so much harder than he’d thought.
that.. this is his life. this is his family. not those people who abandoned him all those years ago. you’re his family. and the thought warms his chest in a way not even you could.
the day flies by, so much faster than simon thought it would. he got to meet everyone, speak with everyone. he even had a beer with your dad. although this may be completely new to him, it instantly felt familiar. felt right. the stability and domesticity he’s craved for so long, and he’s finally got it.
he was nervous the whole time, of course. he still is. but having you there made it all melt all way after a few hours. he stayed by your side the entire time, not wanting to leave you alone, but also not wanting to be alone himself. your reassuring squeezes, your loving pecks to his cheek or arm, they kept him grounded. and he will never be able to re-pay you for such a feat.
when it comes time to eat, everyone is crowded around the living room with heaping plates in hands. your cousins are sprawled on the floor, uncles and aunts sitting in random camping chairs they brought knowing there wouldn’t be enough space for everyone.
simon can’t wait to eat. the fragrant turkey and gravy sitting in his lap, he thinks he will simply die if he doesn’t dig in.
but, one of your aunts mentioned saying grace. something simon doesn’t think he’s done a single time in his life.
everyones heads bow, hands connecting around the room, simon holding yours in his left and your sibling’s in his right as you all squeeze together on the couch.
your mother begins her prayer, giving her thanks for the people, the food, and the house they’re so lucky to be blessed with. simon finds it a little silly as a firm non-believer of any type of religion, but it also squeezes at his heart, because they truly are blessed. he’s blessed.
then, she mentions him.
“and thank you, for bringing such a handsome man into my daughter’s life. we hope for a long, healthy life for the two of them, and hope he doesn’t mind his new crazy family.”
his new crazy family.
you peek your eyes open with the widest grin, glancing over to see if simon is as flushed as you think he is.
but he’s not.
he’s crying.
you can feel his hand slightly trembling, his eyes still clamped shut as the tears roll down his face and his lip pouts out just the slightest. your smile instantly falls, your hand still connected with his as you raise them to wipe at his tears.
you try to be discreet, not wanting to draw any unwanted attention to as you dry his eyes with your sleeve. you can feel your heart doing flips, the fact that he’s so touched that he’s crying making you want to cry yourself.
after they say amen, everyone instantly digs into their plates. except the two of you.
you can’t take your eyes off of simon, and he can’t take his reddened eyes off of you. here, in this moment, you both realize something.
everything you two’ve been through. the lows, the sleepless nights. the highs, nights out on the town until ungodly hours. has lead to this. this connection, this moment.
and, god, neither of you could ask for more. he truly can’t wait to put a ring on your finger.
after a few moments of silent conversation you give him a small smile, and the two of you tune back into the world, digging into your plates and enjoying the presence of your family and each other.
this is his family now. and just like he couldn’t ask for more from you, he couldn’t ask anymore from them. he loves them just as much as he does you.
a few hours later, everyone begins leaving and heading home. thanksgiving is officially over for your household.
you can barely drag simon away from the kitchen, who is stacking a plate the size of his own head with the various dishes strewn across the counter. your mother was absolutely delighted at the fact that he kept going back, for seconds, thirds, then fourths. and now he’s taking the remaining leftovers.
you two make it back out to the truck, him helping you in before the both of you settle in and fasten your seatbelts.
but he doesn’t yet start it. he looks over at you, a content sigh escaping his lips and a smile so warm across his face you think you could melt.
“i love you.”
he simply says, the usual monotone stance in his voice replaced with something else. something warm and sweet, like the soft piece of pumpkin pie in the plate in your lap, neatly covered by a layer of tin foil.
“i love you too, simon. i told you they’d love you.”
you respond, the smile on your own face giddy and almost sickly sweet as you think about everything that just happened, and everything that will happen.
its a little hard for simon to make sense of all these new emotions and flooding feelings as you two make the long drive back home. but one thing he does know, he’s thankful.
thankful for you, thankful for the 5 inch tall plate of food in the backseat, and thankful for your family.
for his family.
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crimson-and-clover-1717 · 16 hours ago
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‘Stede is Fearless’
This comment made by Rhys Darby at the con just won’t leave me.
It was something he stated quite emphatically, but then didn’t get the time to follow up properly. It was in response to an audience question about when Stede realises the man in his closet is actually Blackbeard, he isn’t afraid. I think that question is easy to answer because all Stede can ever see is Ed. But Rhys’ response was about the wider characterisation of Stede ‘…you have to remember, Stede is fearless’. It affected me so much I blogged in real-time.
So, Rhys played Stede with that in mind. And it’s an odd thing because Stede is often very, very afraid. Quaking-in-his-boots, crying-his-eyes-out afraid. But being ‘fearless’ isn’t the absence of fear. It’s living your life, your truth, in spite of it.
Here is my non-exhaustive ‘Stede is Fearless’ list:
Stede is fearless when he leaves his dead marriage (despite the circumstances in which he does so)
Stede is fearless when he decides to captain a pirate crew and ship without any previous experience of the ocean
Stede is fearless when he believes he can change the culture of piracy to one of kindness
Stede is fearless when he announces himself ‘The Gentleman Pirate’
Stede is fearless when he meets Ed which is why he cannot see ‘Blackbeard’
Stede is fearless when he learns history’s greatest pirate was going to murder him, and then offers the hand of friendship
Stede is fearless when he duels Izzy - I mean what the actual fuck was Stede thinking here?
Stede is fearless when he takes history’s most brilliant tactician on a treasure hunt with a fake map
Stede is fearless when he stands apart from everyone in his disdain of Calico Jack, and is proven right
Stede is fearless when he takes care of the crew’s emotions over his own broken heart when Ed leaves with CJ
Stede is fearless when he takes responsibility for Nigel’s murder
Stede is fearless when he tells Ed he doesn’t have to sign the Act of Grace to save him
Stede is fearless when he repeatedly asks Ed what the plan is for escape
And yes, Stede is fearless when he realises he cannot go through with the China plan, and returns home to face what he believes is the horror of who he is
He is fearless (eventually) in putting to rights the mess he left behind in Bridgetown
…in returning to find Ed even though he has doubts about his own adequacy
…in rescuing the crew from the Red Flag as Ed lies dead
…in loving Ed back to life
…in following Ed in his banishment
…in finding a way back with the crew for Ed
…in offering Izzy an olive branch and validation
…in respecting Ed’s autonomy in their relationship
…in dealing with Ned Low himself to protect Ed and the crew
…in taking the initiative in consummating his and Ed’s relationship
…in standing up to Zheng
…in offering unconditional love when Ed returns
Is he clumsy, sometimes wrong or misguided? Definitely. Part of Stede’s beauty is his messiness.
But Stede is terrified throughout most of his actions, and bloody does it anyway.
Because Stede is fearless.
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railleriee · 2 days ago
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blue lock boys playing mario kart
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summary: hc’s of bluelock boys n’ how they play mario kart!
warnings: none
includes: rin, sae, nagi, bachira, chigiri, reo, isagi, shindou, kaiser
Rin:
He plays as blue shy guy! He doesn’t play often, only when you force him to, and yet he wins every single race. At first, he wasn’t competitive while playing at all, acts all chill and claims he “doesn’t care” if he wins the game or not. Although the more you guys play the more heated he begins to get when objects are thrown at him….he hates those damn bananas.
Sae:
He’s so lame and plays as Mario. He literally does not care to play. Does he win at all? Absolutely not. He best stick to soccer. The poor guy absolutely sucks at mario kart. He’s lucky to get in even 5th place. When you first asked to play, he was very “how hard can it be?”. He would never admit that the game is growing on him and the more he plays the more he wants to win. Just like his brother, he can’t stand those damn bananas.
Nagi:
He plays as dry bones! Mr. gamer is so not competitive yet wins every single game. He’s like rin, except he is actually chill and doesn’t care if he wins. The game is “too easy” for him and he gets board after 2-3 races. He’d buy you the expansion packs if you’d ask! It pisses u off how good he is, you can’t seem to win a single game. :(
Bachira:
He plays as toadette! He’s so competitive it’s not even funny. He always tries to mess up your race and things it’s hilarious to whip you out on shells. He 100% sticks his tongue out while playing. His concentration is crazy and no amount of distraction will get to him. Does he ever win? Absolutely not.
Chigiri:
He plays as princess peach! (obvi). His favorite map is rainbow road and he insists you play it every time. He’s not the best player, he never switches his kart and never cares to switch the stats on it, then gets upset when he loses yet again. He whines and makes a scene when he’s knocked down a few places by other players. How often does he win? 50% !
Reo:
He plays as Waluigi! He has a whole set up and is lowkey a crazy mario kart player. He buys controllers specifically for the game and buys all the expansion packs and new tracks. He’s not all the good but will spend hours playing and “practicing” during his free time. He loves when you will go over n’ sit on his bed and play with him for hours. He calls it “bonding time”. (I hc him as a very shy lover and is afraid to let things get awkward so it’s a good way to break silence and keep eachother distracted!)
Isagi:
He plays as toad. He is SO competitive. Also sticks his tongue out while playing. He takes a long time to choose a cart and customize it to each track he plays. He truly thinks it makes a difference for every track. When he falls behind or looses he will always blame it on the kart and not his actual skill. How often does he win? 50/50.
Shido:
He plays as bowser. He claims he isn’t competitive but you can see it in his focus on the game. Yells at the screen when players pass him. He’s broke too many controllers to count. You’ve had him start to bring his own controllers so he doesn’t break yours :( He’s honestly not good at all but likes to think he is! He’ll blame his loss on something stupid then say “one more game”, for the twelfth time.
Kaiser:
He plays as king boo. Honestly could care less about the game but plays it to make you happy. It’s infuriating how good he is at the game, how did he get so far ahead? He plays in complete silence, doesn’t say a word while maintaining the most straight face the entire time. After he wins, he’ll make some snarky comment and ask if you’re ready to give up. Twenty races later, you finally win. He didn’t let you win did he?
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akascow · 2 days ago
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yet another JAYVIK post about the Butterfly Effect :3
also spoilers lol
So Hextech isn't invented in Ekko's alternate timeline, and I feel like since life seemed so much better without Hextech there can be a couple things to infer about alternate Jayce and, by association, our Jayce (and Viktor!) here:
this is a long one and my long posts never get notes but i promise its actually super interesting to think about so u should totally read through it 🧎🏻‍♀️‍➡️🔥
1. Intriguing:
(and also my favorite one bc its Very JayVik lmao)
alternate Jayce never pursued Hextech after the explosion: maybe too guilty over killing someone (because we see alternate Vi died from that explosion during the kids' robbery), he does what Heimerdinger advises him to: fully admitting his crimes and not mentioning the arcane. And we can assume the academy burned all his studies too becauseeeeee…
Viktor never endorsed it. Assuming the admission of guilt theory is correct- Viktor never would’ve even known about the arcane in the first place, because Jayce would never mention it in the council room trial. Viktor would never know that the arcane can be used to help cure people, which we see is what piques his interest in the first place. And like, obviously Viktor wants to cure his leg and illness lol
Which means Viktor never interrupted Jayce's suicide attempt after the trial and Jayce probably goes through with killing himself, Viktor never went to check on him. It seems the compelling force behind Viktor’s interrupting in season 1 was initially from Jayce’s journal, which he picks up while browsing all the Hextech equipment they were planning to destroy. Viktor only really looks at the notes because he was interested in the arcane in the first place, which again, can't happen if Jayce never mentions it in the council room. 
Which is SO important to the plot and me that everything happened the exact way that it did for everything to succeed (which is quite literally the butterfly effect btw lmao). Because it shows how extremely important Jayce and Viktor’s partnership was to not only their own lives, but the entire future of Piltover, good or bad ie no hextech=no shimmer and peace between the cities, hextech= tons of shimmer, the corruption of the arcane, and the destruction of piltover.
Jayce needed someone there to believe in him, and that was Viktor: After the council disagrees with him, and he’s kicked out of the academy and banned from studying the arcane, he tries to find comfort with his mother. She’s the one who was saved using the arcane in the first place after all, so surely she’ll understand. But she tells him to give up on this dream, a dream he’s had almost his entire life. His own mother doesn’t believe in him.
He then goes to the Kiramman’s because “I'll find someone to believe in me,”  most likely assuming if they sponsored his studies in the first place, they would still support him after the trial. But they kick him out from the Kiramman household too, as well as forbid his and Caitlyn’s friendship. And with no one left, the very next scene we see of him is as he’s deciding to jump. 
The only thing that stops him is Viktor showing up. With an interest in the Hextech theory after he reads Jayce’s notes, Viktor wants to help Jayce make the Hextech a reality. Viktor believes in him, and he supports him. That interaction is what leads to their partnership forming, them sneaking back into the lab, grabbing the Hextech equipment and showing Mel and Heimerdinger that it was possible to create magic, and Mel's influence leading to the council’s support and the okay on continuing to develop Hextech together, projecting Piltover into success (and of course accelerating it into ruin, seen in s2. but I won’t get into that snowballing effect here because we’ll be here for hours)
Also, Viktor would be against Hextech if his first and only introduction to seeing it was as a tool to invoke harm (on a Zaunite especially). Which is what would drive Viktor away from investigating it, and before their theory ever even has the chance to get off the ground or evolve, it's already dead in the water for good because:
Something both of them, but especially Viktor, have been extremely against during the entire show was that their plans for Hextech WILL NOT be used as weapons to kill or harm, only to make lives better (especially in the undercity). Think about it: Viktor only adamantly opposed using the Hexcore AFTER it killed Skye.
The guilty conscience of accidentally killing another person with his own technology would not have helped Jayce’s mental state either lol. Like, think about the DIRECT PARALLEL in our timeline: where Viktor almost jumps and kills himself, after Skye's death, as a result of his tampering with the Hexcore, before Jayce interrupts him (ohhh their mirroring, it hurts me)
2. Adjacent:
If not from jumping, then alternate Jayce was arrested or exiled… I mean like, he inadvertently killed a young Zaunite girl. That's a lot more consequential to his conscience, reputation, house name AND criminal record than just the building blowing up in our timeline. It’s pretty vague if anyone died in our timeline from it, I think the most that’s mentioned is some people were injured (“Was anyone hurt?” “A building was blown to bits, what do you think?”) so it would weigh heavier on Jayce’s shoulders if someone actually died in this timeline.
Also remember: he felt so guilty about accidentally killing a child with his hammer in s1, that he gave up entirely on trying to wipe out the production of Shimmer. Once he sees how his Hextech can be used against someone, he drops all his plans because "thats not what we created Hextech for"
From that theory, I'm assuming more-so that he was exiled though? Because Heimerdinger said he was in the alternate timeline for like 3 years and couldn't find Jayce, so I don't know... plus I feel like he would have found Jayce in jail if he was there lol.
And beforeeeee anyone yaps, ik Heimerdinger actually said he thinks Jayce ended up somewhere else, and never specifically stated that he "couldn't find Jayce". BUT from the end, since we see two Ekko's before he goes back to the main timeline, we can assume that the original person's mind inhabits the other's body so that there aren't like paradoxical two people in one place at the same time. 
SO theoretically, Heimerdinger actually does go looking for Jayce, and if he found the alternate timeline's Jayce, he probably would've mentioned it to Ekko when asked if Jayce was there too… right? I’m assuming he was hanging around Ekko for most of the 3 years that he was there, waiting for our Ekko to be projected into the alternate Ekko, because it's not like Heimerdinger just happened to show up right when our Ekko gets there, he might’ve assumed it would happen eventually. And when the alternate Ekko starts freaking out about being in the wrong universe, it's pretty clear that this is his Ekko now lol
But then why stick around Ekko and not Jayce? I guess he was currently closer to Ekko, calling him his current pupil, and given that he was the one who showed him the Firelights community and gave him hope. Plus I mean, Jayce literally voted him off the council from a disagreement over the Hexcore so there's some salt in the wound there lmao. Or maybe because Ekko is a lot younger and would not react as calmly or rationally as Jayce would (I'm assuming... idrk HAHA). You could argue that Heimerdinger was just visiting both of them back and forth, but again if he couldn't find any Jayce, then I think it would explain why he doesn’t mention any Jayce at all, and that's where this make the most sense, at least to me.
3. Lesser:
alternate Jayce also died in the explosion with Vi- When we see it in our timeline, he and Vi were the closest to the blast. If it killed Vi, it would’ve presumably killed Jayce too. And if he did die, then obviously Hextech would never be invented, reasons being: everything I just mentioned in the previous theories.. but like, even more simplified bc he wasn't there to begin with lol
I only say it's a weaker theory because Heimerdinger definitely would've seen a memorial for him (or at the very least a gravestone), given Jayce was in the Talis house and under the study of the Kiramman family, it was a pretty high status name compared to the average Piltovian citizen, and probably wouldn’t be silenced or brushed away… 
Although to counter that, I guess since everything in the over city is super status-y, maybe the Kiramman’s wouldn't want their name being tied with the death of two people, which is a similar but obviously more significant reason to why they kicked him out of their house in our timeline after the trial, his “name is no good now.” Plus we hear in the council trial from Ximena that the Talis family is a lower house too, and their voice doesn’t hold as much weight, so maybe it wouldn’t actually have that much mention? He hasn’t become the “Man of Progress” yet either since he’d never get to finish his studies…hmmmmm idk
anyway thats all i have. if you made it this far i greatly appreciate you :3 🫶🏻 i love analyzing this show because OUGH the jayvik butterfly effect goes CRAZY HARD bc its both figurative with the theory and literal with the butterflies being in SO MUCH of their imagery UGHHHHH what the FUCKKKK
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elvensorceress · 21 hours ago
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very late wip wednesday that is not wednesday at all I'm sorry but have snickerdoodles of longing?
@daisyssousa @spotsandsocks @eddiebabygirldiaz @tizniz @hippolotamus @chaosandwolves @smilingbuckley @rainbow-nerdss @singitforthegirls @bekkachaos @sunflower-eddiediaz @hotshotsxyz @epicbuddieficrecs @daffi-990 @blutterlie @exhuastedpigeon @thelikesofus @livinginsunnyhell 💕 On your left you will see ridiculous pining idiots sharing a bed and being oblivious 👍 and Eddie being Completely Normal about Buck having Feelings(tm) for someone…
Buck lies down and turns onto his side toward Eddie. “Just in my head.”
Eddie reaches out and runs his fingertips along Buck’s forehead. “You still thinking about the breakup? Because he wasn’t good enough for you. No one is. You deserve someone who gets how special you are. You’re a catch.”
Buck huffs but the hint of a smile touches him. “I wasn’t thinking about that. Haven’t thought about him in a while actually.”
That’s something at least. “Good. He didn’t know how lucky he was.”
Eddie doesn’t know why other than his constant urge to be affectionate especially when someone needs cheering up, but as soon as he thinks about how he should withdraw and stop touching Buck, his hand has other ideas. And he has to dip his fingers into Buck’s curls and rub his head.
They’re so soft and so perfect at this length. They could even be longer and Eddie could bury his hand in more of them. 
The look Buck gives him is too piercing. For a second, it strikes through Eddie like lightning. But it’s gone in the next instant. 
Buck noticeably swallows hard. “I don’t know. Maybe he was unlucky.”
“If you’re going to insult my best friend,” Eddie warns and contemplates making a fist in Buck’s hair for emphasis on the warning. He doesn’t. But he does think about it. 
“No, I didn’t mean like that.” Buck leans into Eddie’s hand and smiles, just a little. “Not, ‘he’s so unlucky being with me’ but like, what if— what it he was right? When he said he knew he wasn’t my last. What if he saw something? Or noticed something?”
Eddie’s thumb wanders and brushes over Buck’s cheekbone, all absentminded instinct. “What kind of something?” 
Buck’s eyes flutter and close for a moment before he takes Eddie’s hand and holds it still against his own chest. “S-so-something like, something I didn’t know. Or didn’t realize. I didn’t know I liked him at first. I had no idea that’s what I was feeling. And— a-and what if that happened again? What if he knew I wanted someone else? Or that I have feelings for someone who isn’t him? And that’s how he knew he wasn’t my last.” 
Someone else? 
There’s someone else? 
Eddie doesn’t know why. But he can’t breathe. Or move. He looks at his own hand, happily, eagerly pressed to Buck’s chest over his heart. “You—” he says but loses the rest of the words. All he can do is echo. “Someone else? There’s someone? A new someone? Another someone?”
Buck shrugs, waves it off, doesn’t meet Eddie’s eyes. “N-no. No, but. I don’t know. Hypothetically. I guess. What if that were the case? What if that’s what he thought? And that’s why he ended it.”
What if his ex thought Buck wanted someone else and that’s why he got dumped? It’s plausible? The more concerning thing about this however is, “You’re not thinking about calling him again. Are you? You’re not going to try and get back with him? Please tell me that’s not what this is. You’ve been working so hard. We’ve baked so many things.”
Buck turns pink and shakes his head. “No, that’s not— it’s not what I mean. That’s not the point. He’s not the point. I was just wondering, you know? Since he realized I was crushing on him but totally unaware of it. Maybe it happened again. Maybe he knew before I did. What I feel. In theory, I mean. He knew I have feelings for someone else, so he had to break it off. So— s-so? That would make the whole situation unlucky. For him. Or both of us. If we were both having unrequited feelings for different people.”
That’s— sensible? Also so much to think about. How can Eddie think about any of it. How can there be another person already? That’s three in less than a year. Eddie’s had three relationships in his whole life. How does anyone manage feeling like that? Feeling and then not feeling or feeling something else while still stuck in the first feeling or trying so hard to feel something when there were no feelings whatsoever and you were already thinking that feelings were horrible— it’s too much. Way too complicated. “I guess. That would be unlucky.”
“Right? Unlucky.” Buck nods. Somehow with the energy of a nervous, twitchy squirrel. 
“Is there someone else? Another someone?” Eddie asks again. Because he can’t stop thinking he’s also missed something. Or everything. When did Buck meet someone new? Why wouldn’t he have mentioned? Why, again, are they back to crushes and this person I just met five seconds ago really sees me and unrequited— wait. “There is someone. How would you know it’s unrequited unless you have someone specific in mind?”
Buck lets go of Eddie’s hand. In fact, he moves Eddie’s hand back to his side of the bed and then deliberately lets go of it. “I was just wondering. It’s hypothetical. There isn’t anyone. I’m tired, aren’t you tired? We should sleep, yeah? Goodnight, Eds.” He turns away and switches off the lights and stays on his side with his back to Eddie.
Eddie pokes him in the back where he’s sensitive and ticklish. “You’re a fucking terrible liar.”
Buck bats his hand away and yawns. “Aaahhhmmmm not. So sleepy. Not lying. Sleeping.” 
Are they the fourteen year olds now? Eddie tugs the blankets around himself and wriggles on his back to get comfortable. “Whatever. You brought it up.”
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ghostgirl-22 · 3 days ago
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Hi! <3 You’re like my favorite writer for Artrick! I swear you characterize them perfectlyyy
I keep thinking about the idea of Art and Patrick going on a date when he’s at Stanford. Like obviously Art wouldn’t admit it’s a date, but I imagine it’s after Art reluctantly admits that he wants to hang with Patrick alone when he comes to visit and that he’s a bit jealous of Tashi. So they basically have an unofficial date night. How do you think this would go, and how would Art go about initiating something physical between them because he’s obviously not gay right?
Okay but you’re actually such an amazingly talented writer and I love your stuff so much! Thanks so much for this request I honestly don’t think I did this ask justice and I’m sorry it was so long but I hope this attempt brings you some amusement <3
CW: 18+ !NSFW! 3.8kish words
—-
It’s not that Art is jealous. He’s not jealous. He’s not. But up until now Patrick’s always called him and stopped by on his little trips to Stanford. It’s not like he expects Patrick to stay long, he knows he’s not the main event… but he at least expects him to come by.
So when Patrick shows up at his door three days later, asking if he can stay in Art’s room, Art tries his best not to express his irritation that he hasn’t once come by his room till now. And it really stings because Art knows the only reason he’s here now is because of the limit on how many days he can consecutively “visit” her dorm.
“You’re saving me man,” Patrick says, patting his arm as he drops his duffle on Art’s designated chair full of stuff.
Art shrugs. “Yeah well. Happy to be an afterthought.” He mumbles.
Patrick raises his eyebrows and then gives him a crooked smile. “You are never an afterthought.”
“It’s fine,” Art says, already embarrassed that he brought it up. “You’re dating Tashi Duncan. It’s totally understandable dude.” He tries to sound nonchalant, hopeful that it’s how he comes across. He feels like he spends so much time these days swallowing down on feelings. Feelings he can’t name, feelings he doesn’t even really understand. None of them jealousy. He’s really not jealous.
He does often wonder what they do alone. He thinks about what they do in bed since the most he really knows is that they’re fucking. He knows Patrick calls her all the time because he doesn’t really call Art that much anymore. They used to sit on the phone for hours, barely talking or talking too much, sometimes till late in the night. The same way they did when they were sharing a room in high school. But gradually it became, Patrick leaving the call earlier and earlier. To Patrick not really calling that often at all.
“You know, you can help me with something actually,” Patrick says, flopping onto Arts bed.
“What?”
“I’m taking her on a date tonight, we’re going to get dinner and see a movie.”
“Oh,” Art says. “What movie?”
“The new Saw movie. What number are they on now? 11?” Patrick laughs.
“Oh I didn’t know she’d like something like that,” Art says carefully.
”Yeah well, she saw the first one and she said liked it. She never got around to the others. I asked her if she’d be scared to see it but she said even if she was… she wouldn’t mind being scared if I was there. Isn’t that kinda… hot?”
Art shrugs again, swallowing it down.
”Sorry, is this hard to hear?” Patrick asks, patting his cheek.
“Fuck off,” Art mutters. “I’m just… I’m thinking about my game on Sunday. I’m not really worried about your relationship actually.” He lies.
“Good cause I was just gonna ask for your advice on what to wear. She tends to dress up for this kinda thing and I don’t want her to be annoyed if I show up in shorts and a t-shirt again.”
“You want me to help you pick out an outfit?”
“Yeah… you’re always put together,” Patrick says.
“All your clothes are tailored. Just pick something.” Art says, dryly.
“Okay but I want to wear something comfortable. Not something that makes me look like I’m about to donate a hefty sum at some stuffy fundraiser.”
Art sighs, “fine what’d you bring? Lay it out.”
Patrick empties his duffle on the bed, everything he has that isn’t training gear, playing gear and t-shirts is all wrinkled but Art has an iron. He helps Patrick pick something out. He’s still irritated, but he thinks he covers it well.
He’s actually stunned by how happy it makes him when Tashi calls and says she has to cancel. She does kids tennis lessons for extra spending money and a client wanted her help to prep for a game in the early morning.
Patrick’s talking to her, his tone understanding making her feel better about canceling last minute and promising to see the movie another time. He’s such a good boyfriend. It’s so weird that he’s not fucked it up by now. Art can’t remember Patrick ever dating anyone this long before.
Art’s sitting on his bed, back up against the wall, kicking his feet over the edge, listening to him.
“Sorry man, you’re stuck with me all night,” Patrick says after he hangs up. He knees the bed and sinks into it, settling down and leaning close to Art, he picks up his half ironed slacks and frowns.
“Mm… why don’t we go out?” Art suggests.
Patrick laughs and so does Art, feeling himself beginning to flush.
“Or… I mean… we could just hang out. Watch Hell’s Kitchen or something,” Art says quickly. He looks up when Patrick doesn't reply and Patrick is staring at him, a peculiar look on his face.
“Fuck it, let’s go out.” Patrick smirks. “You can be my date.”
“Yeah? Why not?” Art smiles. “I mean who says two friends can’t go out for dinner and a movie.”
Patrick laughs a bit, his expression flitting quickly between amusement and something Art can’t recognize. “Mm right. Platonic date night. Here we come. You have something nice right?”
”Yeah,” Art says. “I can wear that one shirt I wore to the awards dinner last year.”
“Oh yeah, you look so hot in blue, wear that,” Patrick teases.
“Shut up,” Art smirks, ignoring the weird feeling that blossoms in his chest after Patrick calls him hot.
They get dressed. Patrick’s clothes fit him so well. He’s in an outfit that might read as casual (fitted t-shirt, slacks, and a blazer) if not for the simple elegance of it all being quietly wealthy.
He’s also got a great body and anything fitted on him is going to bring that out. Art doesn’t think about his body often or anything like that, it’s just something he notices. The sky is blue, water is wet and Patrick Zweig has a great body. It just is.
They go to the movies first. “I prefer that when I go out on a date, so we have something to talk about over dinner or drinks,” Patrick explains as he drives them over to the theater in his jeep. “You know in case the date is boring. Not that that’s ever the case with Tashi. Actually, you know what’s crazy? I feel like she’s as easy for me to talk to as you are.”
“Hm,” Art says, swallowing down on something bitter in his throat. “Well I think you should try to find a balance. Talk to other people. You don’t want to scare her away by only ever talking to her.”
“Oh is that what you think?” Patrick says, smirking. “I don’t only talk to her actually. I’ve just got a lot of pressure on me. The only time I get a chance to rest I’m so exhausted— I got one phone call in me and so you know…”
“Oh,” Art says. “Well yeah I guess that makes sense.”
“Are you seeing anyone?” Patrick asks.
“Mm, I mean… I think I might be interested in this girl on the team. She’s really good.” Art lies. He’s not really interested in anyone and he’s probably wasting his time, thinking more about Patrick and Tashi than he spends thinking about his own social life. He wants her so bad unfortunately every other girl he meets just pales in comparison.
—-
They’re actually on the 4th Saw movie, and it’s as stupid as Art might have expected. They laugh about it over dinner at Applebees. Patrick’s got this pretty realistic looking fake id so he orders a drink and they split it when the waitress isn’t looking. Not that she cares, she’s also a Stanford student. She’s been to a few tennis games to watch Tashi play but she knows Art is the number one singles player on the men’s team.
“You’re really good,” she smiles at him and he can feel his skin flushing as Patrick grins at him from across the table.
”Thanks uh— but Patrick actually plays professionally.” Art says.
“That’s so cool,” she says, she smiles at Patrick and then looks back at Art. “I would love to learn to just hit the ball over the net.” She laughs.
”He can teach you that easy,” Patrick says. Art kicks him under the table and he just grins wider.
“Can you really?” The waitress asks, flipping her pretty blonde hair over her shoulder.
“Yeah I mean… whenever,” Art says, awkwardly.
“Cool, I’ll be back. You guys want anything else?”
Patrick gives Art a meaningful look and then orders a second drink.
“When were you gonna tell me you got number one singles?” Patrick asks, watching her as she walks away.
“I figured Tashi told you,” Art says.
“Yeah but you should have told me,” Patrick says. “She’s hot right?” He adds, gesturing back towards the waitress.
“I mean… I can tell her you think she’s hot,” Art says. “I don’t think she believes you’re actually dating Tashi anyway.”
Patrick laughs, “God you’re such a dick. I meant for you. That would be a fun night.”
“I guess,” Art says, rubbing his palms on his lap. It’s all he has to say for Patrick to keep teasing him throughout the rest of the night, getting her to come back over and flirt with Art. He orders more and more drinks which she happily brings over.
In spite of the teasing, it’s actually really fun. Of course Art has been to movies with Patrick before, even gone out to dinner with him and their friends or family before, but this feels different. Art can’t figure out why… maybe because he gets to be in Tashi’s place. Maybe because it feels like old times.
They probably spend two and half hours in Applebees talking about the movie, high school, tennis, their parents, video games, girls and anything else that pops into their heads. They only leave because its 12 am and the restaurant’s closing. By then they’ve split a total of six cocktails and Art is feeling so tipsy.
“How much is it?” He asks when the waitress brings the bill.
“I’ll take care of it,” Patrick says.
“Dude it’s okay we can split,” Art says.
“No relax, it’s our platonic date night, right?” Patrick pulls out his credit card. “I can give you this though.”
He hands Art the non singable copy of the receipt and on the bottom the waitress left a note: For whenever you decide to teach me how to serve, Jenny. Followed by her phone number and a heart.
“She drew a heart and everything,” Patrick teases.
”It’s for you,” Art says, shyly.
“It’s so clearly for you, Stanford boy,” Patrick smirks.
“We probably have to take a cab home,” Art hiccups. Changing the subject. He does slip the receipt into his jeans pocket though.
“Oh yeah,” Patrick says. “You’re so responsible by the way. I love that about you.”
Art snorts a laugh and Patrick starts laughing too. Patrick leaves a big tip and they call a cab. Art promises to come back with him to pick up his jeep in the morning and they share a cigarette while waiting for the cab. When it arrives they hop in the backseat for the 25 minute ride back to campus.
Art’s feeling sleepy, the combination of food, alcohol and a long car ride is lethal for him. He closes his eyes, head slipping to settle on Patrick’s shoulder. Distantly, he feels Patrick rest a hand on his thigh and he opens his eyes, suddenly wide awake. It should be a nothing feeling but Art goes rigid, he feels it all up and down his spine and even worse, his cock starts to wake up.
“Did you have fun?” Patrick asks, quietly.
“Yeah,” Art says, he stares at the meter on the cab. He feels so dizzy and confused as Patrick’s fingers play a light pitter patter along his thigh.
“I’m sorry I’m not… free all the time. Like in high school, you know?” His voice is soft, Art can almost feel the vibration of it from where he’s leaning. He can feel Patrick’s breath on his cheek. It makes no sense the way his body is reacting. Maybe he’s drunker than he thought.
“Uh,” Art sits up. “Don’t worry about it. We’re both um— busy.”
“I know,” Patrick says, he’s still playing the pattern on Art’s thigh. “But I feel like I’ve been neglecting you.”
Art feels anxious, he looks up front, he can see the driver glancing back at them in the rear view. “Look… obviously your girlfriend comes first. We can do bro stuff whenever…” Art says as he gently eases Patrick’s hand off his thigh even though it feels nice. His heart is racing like he’s running some kind of marathon he doesn’t know why but it’s probably just the drinks. All the alcohol making his head all fuzzy.
“Yeah,” Patrick sighs. “Bro stuff.” He rests his head against the back of the seat and they’re mostly quiet for the rest of the ride. Arts mind is racing. All he can think about is how close they are but how much it feels like something is slipping away.
The halls are mostly empty as they get back to the dorm. There’s a few students still up. A couple talking softly to each other. One girl on the floor with her headphones plugged in watching something on her laptop. Some guy exits his room, talking on his cellphone as he breezes past them.
“You think I can sneak back to her room or no?” Patrick asks, one arm resting on the door frame as Art leans in to unlock his room.
Art feels his heart still beating oddly fast, probably because Patrick is right behind him. He’s never been able to manage personal space as long as they’ve been friends but right now Art is just so… aware of him. “You can stay here. It’s just one night. I’ll even let you have the bed all to yourself.” Art says.
“It’d be two nights. I leave on Sunday.”
“Okay, two nights then,” Art pushes open the door, breaking the closeness. It feels like a temporary bit of relief.
Patrick follows him in and slips off his shoes. “That’s the one thing I hate about dressing up. Fucking boat shoes.”
Art smiles. “I’m really drunk I think.” He says, kicking off his own shoes.
“Yeah?” Patrick smirks.
“Yeah, I don’t know how I’m gonna make it to practice tomorrow.”
“Isn’t it in the afternoon?” Patrick pulls off his jacket and then his t-shirt. He digs through his duffle for something to put on.
“Yeah but still.” Art realizes then he’s been watching Patrick undress, like he hasn’t seen him butt naked before. He shakes his head and goes to change into his own night clothes.
“Don’t be mad,” Patrick says as Art gets his jeans off.
“What?”
“I think I need a session, maybe I found that waitress hotter than I realized,” he’s in his boxers holding himself. His eyes fall over Art’s body.
Art looks down and swallows. He’s seen Patrick erect before… even touched it… But they were a lot younger last time. They’d actually grown out of doing it in front of each other a long time ago.
But ever since Patrick brought it up that night… ever since they kissed… Art’s mind would occasionally wander to what it might be like to see it again. And now there it was… just… right in front of him. Patrick holding it idly like it’s not ridiculous to be carrying all of that around. Art’s fingers twitch, his mouth is suddenly too wet and he swallows again. The worst part… he’s getting hard.
Patrick sighs. “I’ll go in the bathroom.”
“Um…” Art can hear his heartbeat in his ears, he sits on his bed just because his knees are shaky. “I thought… I think she’s hot too.”
Patrick is still for a moment watching him, before he smiles and approaches Art. “Right? I think it was the skirt. I mean those fucking legs.”
Art nods. He reaches for Patrick. His head is all fuzzy, his ears are ringing and Patrick straddles him on the bed. Art touches it through his boxers. It’s heavy and really, really full.
Patrick eases his fingers into Art’s hair. “And she’s blonde….I think I like blondes more than I should.”
Art grips him properly. It’s not just lengthy, it’s thick. The only thing he can think about is what it might feel like in— in— just in.
He rubs it up and down, like it’s his own. He’s never done anything like this before so he’s shocked when Patrick reacts, “Fuck,” he gasps, this quiet sound that makes Art shiver. Art grabs at the front of his boxers and eases them down, revealing a shock of dark hair and Patrick’s cock as it bobs forward. Circumcised, all pink, and all so real. So much bigger than the last time Art saw it like this.
He leans over and licks at the shaft.
“Whoa,” Patrick breathes and then he chuckles.
“I uh—‘m sorry,” Art looks up at him, anxious that maybe this is too much, too far. That he did something wrong.
“God Art. You’re so fucking…” Patrick breathes and settles down on Art’s lap. He takes Art’s face in his hands and kisses him. Art breathes in as their lips touch. It almost feels the way it felt that night. Something warm, almost on fire. Their chemistry overwhelming.
God, is he into this? Is he into Patrick? He thought it was all because of Tashi but this still feels good even when she’s not watching. And right now Art knows he wants to feel more of Patrick’s tongue. He wants to lick his cock again. His mouth hasn’t really stopped feeling wet, but the kiss feels good in spite of it…maybe because of it. He finds himself exploring every inch of Patrick’s mouth. His heart is still racing. He knows Patrick can feel how hard he is. The way he feels Patrick poking against his stomach. He grips it and gets excited when Patrick hums a pretty little moan.
Patrick eases them out of the kiss and looks at Art, fingers tangled in his hair. His cheeks are all flushed and rosey. His freckles are so vivid up close. He’s actually incredible. “You want to taste it again?” He asks, brushing up against Art’s lips.
“Mmhm,” Art nods.
Patrick takes a deep breath and he actually stands up in front of Art, so his cock is just right in front of Arts face. Art stares at him and nibbles on his thumb. Patrick’s got freckles on his tummy, just a couple spattered here and there. Art wants to lick those too.
He sits up and grips Patrick’s cock again. It feels so warm he must run at a thousand degrees. Art licks at him. He can see the way Patrick’s muscles tense. Hear his little breaths. Art starts licking more. Up and down, all over the length of him. He likes how it feels along his tongue. The heat of it, how soft and solid it is at the same time. He likes the taste and the smell, salty and heady. He sees the pearls leaking from the tip and tastes that. He really likes how it tastes so he sucks on the tip a little more. And it’s all punctuated by the way its affecting Patrick.
“Mm, fuck sweetheart, I know you want to explore but this feels insane.” Patrick breathes. “You’re gonna mess around and make me shove it in your mouth.”
Art feels warm at the way he says sweetheart. And the thought that Patrick might lose control over him.
He opens up and takes in more.
“Fuuckk,” Patrick sighs like he’s sinking into a warm bath. Art closes his eyes and runs his tongue over the length. He’s almost sure he can taste Patrick’s heart beating through it. It feels incredible and Patrick starts moaning for him which makes Art begin to lose himself in it. It’s too big to get it all inside at once but he tries to take a little more. His mouth is so wet that when he pulls back spit drips onto his thighs. He licks and then takes it in again, more this time.
“Oh shit,” Patrick gasps. He starts moving his hips like he can’t control himself and Art needs to grab on to keep him from shoving it too deep. But he likes the sliding feeling as it moves back and forth over his tongue. His own cock is aching. He feels like he might start pushing up against the air too. It’s so hot how he’s the one doing this to Patrick. It’s all him. His mouth. His tongue.
“Can you look at me?” Patrick gasps.
Art hums and looks up as it’s sliding out of his mouth, he takes a small breath before taking it back in again but his mouth starts filling immediately. Art feels it hot and thick slipping down his throat and he starts coughing. Which makes it start spilling everywhere, dripping off his lips and Patrick’s still coming so Art licks around the tip to try and taste it.
“No… wait, fuck, fuck… that’s too sensitive just… relax,” Patrick gasps, breathlessly. He pulls his shorts back up and stumbles to sit on the bed next to him. He rubs his thumb over Art’s messy lips, Art licks at it and Patrick smiles letting him suck it for a minute before pulling it away and sucking it into own mouth. “Come here.” He rubs his thighs.
Art stares at him for a minute and then moves to straddle him. “Sit,” Patrick says, softly.
Art settles on his lap.
“Have you ever done that before?” Patrick asks, rubbing him over his boxers.
“No, is it okay?” Art asks, his voice a little hoarse.
“So fucking okay,” Patrick says and he starts kissing him immediately. It feels so satisfying, rubbing his tongue along Patricks after having a mouth full of him. He feels Patrick’s fingers ease into his boxers, gripping his cock where Patrick starts jerking him off properly. That combined with the stimulation from the kissing makes Art finish embarrassingly quickly all over Patrick���s fingers and in his shorts.
“Mm I need another cigarette,” Patrick laughs, licking his fingers and gazing at Art.
Art swallows hard, mildly panicked now that he’s back in his right mind. He climbs off of Patrick’s lap.
“What?” Patrick asks. ”And don’t say sorry.”
Art bites his tongue and takes a deep breath. “I think I drank too much.”
Patrick grins. “I don’t know. You kinda spilled some of it,” he gestures to Art’s lap, a bit of pearly liquid settled there.
“That’s not funny,” Art says, biting down on a smile.
“Oh it’s really funny.” Patrick says, getting to his feet.
“Where are you going?” Art asks. Strangely enough he just kinda wants to be near him.
“I’m gonna wash my hands,” he says. “And clean up a bit.”
Art bites his lip.
“You want to come?”
Art nods and gets to his feet. “I’ll just brush my teeth and um… change my…” he gestures vauguely.
Patrick smirks and beckons for Art to lead the way. “So,” Patrick says. “Where do you wanna go tomorrow night?”
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