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sanvirtheobserver · 1 month ago

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SMG4 Nexus Skits

Just a collection of miscellaneous skits I made for fun.

Jax is just lazing about in the lounge, passing time with some Family Guy on the TV when he sees SMG3 of all people come in.

SMG3: Hey Jax.

Jax: Sup, captain?

SMG3: Yeah...... remember when you showed me that add for Princess Daisy's bathwater on Amazon?

Jax: Yeah. Funniest s*** I've ever seen. Why'd you ask?

SMG3: Well, I was just wondering how you came across that. Like, you don't just come across that out of the blue while browsing Amazon. That's the kind of stuff you need to go OUT OF YOUR WAY to look for.

That's when Jax realized why SMG3 was here. What little logic and pity left in his head pleaded for him to stop, but today was a slow day and he was itching for something to do.

Jax: You sure you wanna drop down this rabbit hole, buddy?

SMG3: Oh please, it can't be any worse than my stuff.

A sinister smile crept across Jax's face as he brought out a laptop and punched in his password.

Jax: Your funeral.

(Imagine this random static.)

Melony and Kaizo are both hard at work in the kitchen, with Mario and Noah trying their best to help. Emphasis on the "trying" part.

Melony: Are you sure this is a good idea, Kai?

Kaizo: Eh, I'm sure it'll be fine. I mean, they can't be any worse than Meg-

His train of thought is interrupted by Noah dropping a whole stick of butter into the bowl.

Kaizo: Dude, what the hell!?

Noah: The recipe calls for one cup of butter. I'd assume a stick should be one cup, right?

Melony: I'm pretty sure it meant MELTED butter.

Noah: OOOOOOOOHHHH....... That makes more sense.

Mario: Hold that thought.

Mario rushes out of the kitchen for a second. A slight ruckus can be heard in the storage closet before he comes back with a large heat lamp. He carefully aims the bulb at the bowl and sets it to max power before switching it on.

Mario: That should help melt that butter in no time!

Noah: Nice! Good save, dude.

They share a celebratory high five as the combined power of their two respective braincells has saved the dish. Kaizo and Melony aren't quite sure how to respond to this.

(At least they didn't try sticking a metal bowl into the microwave.)

Wario: ANOTHER!

Vale slides another Tonic and Gin across the tabletop. It's his fifth one tonight.

Vale: You're coming up on your cap, buddy.

He shrugs her off as he takes another swig.

Wario: *hic* Have you ever had that feeling that.....that you're *snort* living the same day over and over and over and over and......... *burp* It's still ....... you try waiting in bed, going for a pizza pie and....... but there's an alien in your s***er....... then a car comes and *hic* and you go get a pizza pie and a book and a pot of chilly and..... It all BLOWS UP. Eventually you're just like "f*** it," and do whatever you want because nothing ever changes, right? Ya get a car, blow something up, outrun the cops....*sips drink*..... and you ride up the side of a building...... there's a helicopter and.....and..... It...... it comes to a point where you ask yourself........ "Am I REALLY going to just accept my fate?....... Am I REALLY gonna just...... let this be my life now?............*sniff*......Nah..... I'm-a not gonna die. I'm-a gonna FIGHT...... and I'm-a gonna WIN! And THAT is...... EXACTLY what I di*burp*id. And when ya WIN, ya find out.....this was all because the Reaper..... JUST WANTED SOME ICE CREAM.

He let's out a bellowing laugh and downs the rest of his drink.

Wario: Eh....... okay....... time for an eyes open nap.

He gets up to leave and faceplants DIRECTLY into the floor. Vale just collects his glass and gets to work on adding up his tab.

(The guy needs a hug. And a designated driver.)

Ragatha and Saturday are just chilling out over at Meggy's house. Well, at least Ragatha is. Saturday is just silently seething. Meggy comes in with more drinks and notices Saturday staring daggers at the TV.

Meggy: Um........ what's up with her?

Ragatha: We're watching a true crime documentary.

Saturday: These police make me want to murder people.

Meggy: Seriously? That stuff is the reason I dropped out of police training.

Ragatha: I thought it would be interesting. It's not that bad.

Saturday: Not that bad!? Markus is the WORST excuse of an officer I've ever seen! It doesn't matter whether or not you have a sodding warrant. Protocol dictates that if you see a potentially LIFE THREATENING SITUATION, it is within your authority to BUST THE F*** ING DOOR DOWN. Instead, he wastes almost a F***ING HOUR getting a locksmith! And keep in mind that Carmen, the subject in question, was found to have been SHOT IN THE HEAD. TWICE! The fact he was even ALIVE is a bloody miracle. And this isn't even touching on the fact that it took them 4 HOURS to respond to a wellness check!

The princess gets up from the couch and starts going absolutely nuclear.

Saturday: THAT'S NOT EVEN THE GHALF OF IT! TAKES THEM 9 HOURS TO EVEN REALIZE HE NEEDS MEDICAL ATTENTION, AND EVEN AFTER ACKNOWLEDGING THAT CARMEN SHOULD BE IN A F***ING HOSPITAL, MARKUS JUST PASSED IT OFF AS A CONCUSSION AND PROCEED TO INTERROGATE THE POOR MAN FOR ANOTHER 40 F***ING MINUTES! HE BROKE HIS F***ING JAW FOR ARBOR'S SAKE! NO MERCY, NO EMPATHY, NOT EVEN A DRINK OF WATER! AND THEN WHEN EVERYTHING WAS SAID AND DONE, THAT SLIMY, HEARTLESS, SON OF A C*** F***ING W**** LET HIS PARTNER OF 3 F***ING YEARS, AND THE ONLY ONE TO ACTUALLY HELP THE POOR MAN TAKE THE FALL TO KEEP HIS NAME ON PAYROLL! AT THAT POINT, SCREW DEMOTION! SCREW EXPULSION! SCREW INCARCERATION! THAT PARASITE DESERVES TO BE TAKEN OUT BACK AND SHOT! IN THE HEAD! TWICE! AAAAAAAAGH!

She sits back down with an exhausted sigh. Ragatha and Meggy wisely decided to stay quiet to give her a chance to cool off.

Saturday: Can we please watch something else now?

(Maybe they should watch some Bee And Puppycat instead.)

Tari and Pomni head inside the Castle. A long day of sparring has left the two exhausted.

Tari: So, how you feeling?

Pomni: Better. My wrists are still killing me from all that swinging.

Tari: Yeah. It took me a bit to get used to that too. But hey! Your techniques are getting better.

They both head into the Gaming Room and are met with the sight of a small man balled up in the corner.

Tari: Um....... Three? You alright there, buddy?

His gaze remains locked onto the wall in front of him.

SMG3: Do you think God stays in Heaven.......because he lives in fear of what he's created?

Pomni has a sneaking suspicion about what's happening. She turns to Jax, who's lazing about on the couch with that characteristic s*** eating grin on his face.

Pomni: Jax.

Jax: Sup?

Pomni: What did you do?

Jax: Elaborate.

She points towards SMG3, still looking as if he saw the ass of God.

Jax: OOOOOOH him! He saw my browser history.

Pomni: JESUS CHRIST, WHY DID YOU LET HIM DO THAT!? S*** LIKE THAT IS WHY ZILS STARTED KILLING PEOPLE!

Jax: The guy was curious! And in all fairness, I DID give him a fair warning.

Caine pops in through the front door with a spring in his nonexistent step.

Caine: GOOD AFTERNOON, my Perpendicular Pillbugs! How are we all doing on this fine day?

Tari: Well, Three seems to be having......... a moment, right now.

Caine: Ah, I see! You took a peak at a certain rabbit's search history, didn't you?

SMG3: God is dead.......... and we have killed him.

He hovers over to SMG3 and picks him right up.

Caine: Don't worry, Three. Me and Aybel will help flush all those UNGODLY HORRORS FROM THE BLACKEST ABYSS from your pretty little head in no time!

He flies out with SMG3, and Jax lies back down on the couch without a care in the world. Pomni was NOT as pleased.

Jax: What? You heard him. Three will be better in no time.

Pomni: *sigh* why are you like this?

(There are some things human eyes simply aren't meant to gaze upon.)

#smg4 #smg4 au #smg4 fanfic #smg4 tari #tadc #murder drones #team fortress 2 #fanfic #au #taking flight #Nexus!AU

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ripgray-moved · 8 months ago

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cooking has always been an exacting experience. while the competency for art seemed to have skipped him entirely as a child ( and even now, the skill he has for drawing is only from a technical standpoint; he can't draw from imagination, only detail what he has in front of him with moderate accuracy ), peter cooks with all the passion of a seasoned painter.

as he recalls it, he used to despise cooking, though perhaps it was more for the reason he learned than the act itself. the fact was, charlie was his younger, 'disabled' sister; while both his mother and father were swallowed by their busy jobs, peter was officially on house duty post-school day. it was his responsibility to entertain her, to bathe her and yes, to feed her. he won't pretend he was making complex dishes when he was a little kid. he was letting a tin of spaghettios simmer on the hob and spreading it across some toast. making her tiered sandwiches on cheat days because he couldn't be bothered to read the cooking instructions. then at some point a couple of years later, his mom had started complaining about calories and how the things he was making were 'not real food'. as angry as he'd wanted to be with her, peter was sick of canned hotdogs and microwave fries. he'd been all but ecstatic to learn how to cook proper meat with his dad.

now, peter. the stove's a big responsibility. i know, dad. i'm not gonna mess it up. good, because messing up could burn down the h— dad.

"yeah," he clarifies with a healthy level of enthusiasm as he begins rolling the dough he's made; squashing it rhythmically in his hands, revelling in the feeling of flour on his palms. maybe it's an odd thing to have missed, but by god did he. "i learned when i was pretty young. maybe... eleven, twelve? my dad bought a whole bunch of meat and taught me how to cut it up and cook it from scratch. i fucked it up a few times but he'd grabbed spares, like he knew i would. 'cause it was hard, not 'cause i was stupid. he always... had patience with me. just wish i'd seen him more." peter's not entirely sure if he meant for that to come out or not. so far, he's said nothing at all about his family. he gets the feeling that daryl hasn't asked about it because typically, when somebody is quiet about their family, it means they're gone. not peter's, though. at least not to this particular plague. "it definitely made meal time better. i think if i ate another can of tuna straight from the tin i'd have been a much worse person than i am now. haha, even ch—"

and just like that, peter goes quiet. deathly quiet. even charlie was sick of that shit, he'd almost said. after a brief stretch of immobility, he rights himself; resumes his task before he can ruin the vibe entirely. this is a good day, he reminds himself, you're gonna eat something real for the first time in a long time.

"...anyway, it was a huge step up from where i was at with the tins and shit. suddenly i was peeling potatoes and feeling like an adult holding the big kitchen knife. dad's kitchen knife, y'know? standing there making chicken tagliatelle and enchiladas and beef stew like i knew jack-shit about what i was gonna do when i really was an adult." a soft chuff is released, head shaking as if he finds his younger counterpart really quite ridiculous. "the funny thing? i think i was an adult all along. it's the kid part i never quite got down. didn't have the time."

the way that peter gazes around the pantry fills daryl with a sudden sense of fulfillment. his excitement over things like flour and eggs and salt, eyes as big and wide as the dinner plates they may soon be eating off of, is telling of just how long he's been out there on his own scavenging for scraps. it reminds daryl, too, of the first time he and his people had the opportunity to really explore this place; to see the pantry when it was actually fully stocked and brimming with things to choose from instead of sitting nearly empty in their current time of hardship.

now that had been quite the sight to behold years ago, even if daryl admittedly hated it at the time— so much so that he'd refused to take anything from it until much later down the line. he'd let the alexandrians and his people have their canned vegetables and their stale boxes of crackers while he went outside of the walls for food, heavily preferring the taste of wild game to that of carol's casseroles.

his stubbornness about the community and its resources had only lessened when aaron managed to get through to him. he'd made the effort to meet daryl where he was, rather than trying to drag him through something he wasn't ready for. it's that kindness and compassion that reflects in daryl now as he considers each light, bouncing step that peter takes around the pantry shelves with an air of goodnatured amusement.

as overwhelming as alexandria must be for peter, daryl is glad that this, at the very least, is something he seems to melt into like it's nothing. in fact, he's never seen his companion this bright and animated; not even when he completed his work on asmodeum did he show this much excitement. maybe it just means that peter feels like he can really be himself here— or at the very least, around daryl.

‘ yeah— yeah, sound good. tagleeuh-... whatever it is. ’ he comments, giving a dismissive wave of his hand as if to tell peter to go on, do what you need to. he finds it a little funny that he would even ask his opinion on the matter: they've roughed it in the wilds together for long enough now that he should know daryl is not a picky eater. it's not that he doesn't have tastebuds ( contrary to what others might say ), but whatever it is, this pasta dish sounds like a gourmet meal. one that he's sure he's going to devour no matter what.

as peter gathers what he needs, daryl does as he knows is required of him and silently fills out the pantry log for the items they're taking with them. he doesn't bother his companion with explaining how any of it works right now, instead just letting him vibrate with his elation without interruption. he deserves it, anyway: to be present in his happiness for once without something or someone coming to put a damper on it.

it's only when they get back to his place that daryl finally sits down, taking a spot at the nearby kitchen table. he has a good view from where he's at of what peter is doing as he sorts through the ingredients and gets right to it with what seems to be practiced ease.

‘ you used t'cook a lot before? ’ he asks out of genuine curiosity, hands resting in front of him on the table as he habitually fidgets with his own fingers. the fact that peter can make pasta by hand is impressive to him— daryl can't imagine trying to do that. it makes him wonder what kind of life peter must have had before the cult, and before the dead began to walk.

#⋆ ⋮ 𝘄𝗮𝘁𝗰𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗹𝗼𝗼𝗸𝘀 𝗹𝗶𝗸𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗻𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲. ❜ ( aintashes. )#⋆ ⋮ 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘄𝗲 𝗱𝗮𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝗱𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗻𝘆. ❜ ( in character. )#aintashes #[PUKIIIIIIIING WTF!!!#PETER OPENING UP EVEN THOUGHIT'S A **TEENY TINY BIT?**#I'VE ASSUMED THE DEAD FLY POSE I CAN'T GO ON ]

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cherrydreamer · 2 years ago

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It starts with a microwave.

Susan's microwave.

Susan's fancy-ass fucking brand new microwave that Neil had so smugly given her as a birthday gift only yesterday. The one that he'd then gone on to give a whole damn speech about, making sure the whole family- especially Billy- knew just how expensive it was, how it was a 'top of the line' product and should be treated as such, how they needed to make sure it was always wiped out after every single use and how they best not do anything dumb, like trying to reheat chicken on the soup setting.

That microwave.

The one that Max had, of course, somehow managed to break, her stupid, clumsy hands jabbing at the buttons until one of them stuck down and the timer went all weird and the fucking thing wouldn't stop beeping until Billy wrenched the plug out of the socket.

That fucking microwave.

And Billy knows that he's getting the blame. Because that's how it works. Because, even though it's not his fault, Billy is the one who's gonna get it in the neck for this, even though he'd told Max, he'd fucking told her, that if she just waited five goddamn minutes for him to finish his workout, then he'd sort out some dinner for both of them. But she just couldn't. She just had to rush on in and break it and ruin his whole fucking night and-

It doesn't matter.

Billy reminds himself of that fact. It doesn't matter how it happened because it's happened. Neil and Susan went out for their special fancy meal and Billy didn't watch Max closely enough and Max broke Susan's brand new microwave and, as soon as he finds out, Neil is going to break Billy.

It's fucked.

Everything is fucked.

Billy, most of all, is fucked.

Except. Maybe he isn't.

Because when the disorientation of the initial panic starts to ebb, giving way to an all too familiar clench of cold fear, Billy is suddenly granted an idea. A slight glimmer of hope. And he knows he can't afford to replace the thing, but maybe a repair could be manageable. Doable. It'll probably wipe out all his savings, the wad of cash he keeps under the seat of the Camaro and that he's pinned a whole load of his future hopes on, but hey, if Neil comes back and finds out what Billy's done, then his chance of a decent future is looking mighty slim as it is.

So Billy has a plan. Sort of. He heaves the microwave into his arms and hauls it out of the kitchen, yelling back at Max to grab the trailing cord clattering along the counter, and he manages not to drop it the whole way down the steps and then he's placing it into the passenger seat of the Camaro, taking more care of it than any actual passenger he's ever had, and then, with Max in the back, he high tails it all the way to the Hawkins' high street, screeching to a stop right outside of Radio Shack.

And it's closed. Of course it's closed. The real, definite, 'sign flipped and shutters down' kind of closed. Of course it is.

Because that's the kind of night Billy's having. And, ok, maybe he loses it a little and aims a frustrated kick against the door and maybe he pounds against the shutters and yells a few obscenities at the well locked door for good measure.

But hey, who can blame him?

And he's just about to turn around, head back to the Camaro and either drive home to face his fears, or just carry on driving right outta Hawkins, just him and Max and a kidnapped microwave that he might manage to hawk for gas money. He hasn't decided yet.

But for once, someone's looking out for Billy. Because, despite the store being closed, there's a sudden flown of a light flicking on behind the shutters, and then the door is opening and the chubby face of Bob Newby is right there, peering out at them with a bemused expression,

"Now guys, I know we've just got the new Flavoradio in but you kids really don't have to go beating down the door to get it, they'll all still be there tomorrow."

But Billy's already back at the Camaro, lugging the microwave out, raising a surprised sounding chuckle from Bob and an amused retort, "Careful there, sport, that looks like a weighty one." And then Bob's off, chatting away like he and Billy are old friends. Like Billy actually gives a shit about the crap he's rambling on about, "That how you get those muscles, huh, lifting appliances? Cause, that'll do it. Some of the guys in our warehouse? Arms like Schwarzenegger. Not quite the same for us store guys though-" he pauses, patting his gut and smiling, "Although I can't deny that the old brain cells do get a fair workout now and again."

Billy really doesn't have time for this, and, for all Bob's stupid jokes, the microwave is fucking heavy, one sharp corner of it digging right into the crook of his arm, so he's a little harsher than he means to be when he says, "Look, I really need this thing fixing. Tonight." But he quickly manages to tack on a, "Please?" when Bob's eyebrows start to raise.

"Well, now, Mister," Bob sucks his teeth, and tilts his head, "this is Radio Shack, and this thing sure as sugar isn't a radio. And technically, we're not even open."

Billy's heart starts to sink. Plummet, actually, aiming to land somewhere deep down to his feet, but then Bob's smiling again, "But hey, I won't tell if you don't."

And then he winks, ushering Billy and Max inside. He gestures for Billy to put the microwave down on the counter as he pulls a tiny, plastic case from out of his shirt pocket, opening it up and selecting a tiny screwdriver from a whole row of them, tapping the silvery end of it lightly against the microwave's control panel.

"And it just so happens-" Bob wiggles the screwdriver back and forth, tongue poking out from between his teeth as he concentrates on getting the angle just right, "-that I have some personal experience with this model. There's a bit of a design flaw with the, uh, the plastic edge here, right by the buttons, you see?" He taps the screwdriver on the place he means, smiling even more when Billy finally leans in to look, "Press it with a little bit too much force, and you might just find that it tends to jam right up, especially if someone touches it with sticky hands." Bob aims a knowing nod at where Max stands browsing over by the personal stereos, "But it's nothing that can't be fixed when you know how. In fact..."

Bob purses his lips, looking back down at the control panel and then up at Billy. He nods, seemingly to himself, and then he pulls the screwdriver away, holding it out, handle first, to Billy, "Why don't you do it?"

Billy shakes his head, "Nah, no way, I'll just fuck it up even more.

"No you won't," Bob sounds so certain of that fact, and Billy has no idea why, until he continues, "Because I'll help you. Teach you. So you do it and then if it happens again, well, you won't need to lug this thing all across town."

It's sensible, really, Billy thinks. Knowing Max, this is unlikely to be a one-time occurrence. And he can just imagine the look on Neil's face if Billy is the one to save the day. Hell, he thinks, his dad might even be proud of him. It'd be good, Billy thinks, really good.

So he takes the screwdriver. He listens to Bob's calm, measured instructions. He follows them. He listens a bit more. He pokes at the button. He jiggles it. He twists it. He nudges it.

It doesn't budge.

He nudges it again.

Nothing. If anything, it looks even flatter.

Billy throws the screwdriver down on the counter with a clatter, "I can't do it. I can't fucking-"

"You can, you've got it, look it's almost there," Bob's voice is patient. Reassuring. He picks the screwdriver back up, pressing it into Billy's hand again, "just tilt it up at the edge, give it a little bit more of a tap, and see what happens."

Billy breathes in and out, deliberately slow. He focuses his gaze on the end of the screwdriver, right where it rests against the sunken, stuck in button.

He tilts it up. He gives it a tap. Then another, a bit harder. And then one more, for luck.

This time, there's a click. It's the tiniest sound but it echoes in Billy's ears, and the button springs up, flush and level with the others.

Fixed.

Billy knows that he's grinning, a big, dorky, ear to ear one that he just can't stifle, and he looks up to see a matching expression on Bob's face.

"There you go," Bob says, voice full of pride, "Couldn't have done it any better myself. Look at that, huh?' Bob taps an approving finger on the button, pushing it in and watching it spring right back out, just as it should, "Good as new."

Billy nods, holding the screwdriver out for Bob, but Bob just shakes his head, gently pushing it back into Billy's hand.

"Why don't you keep hold of it?" he smiles, "Just in case?"

And Billy doesn't trust himself to speak. Not right now, when the surge of relief flooding through his body has left him dizzy and emotional, and Bob's kindness is only making things worse. So he nods, taking the screwdriver and dropping it into the pocket of his gym shorts, and then he heaves the microwave back into his arms, declining Bob's offer to help him carry it.

It's only when Billy's got the microwave and Max packed safely back into the Camaro that his brain catches up with him, and he grabs the bundle of cash from the gap underneath the seat, growling out a, "You didn't see anything, OK?" at Max's little gasp of surprise, and then he's heading back into the store.

He still can't quite meet Bob's eyes, especially when that dumb, bright, proud fucking smile is still on his face. So instead Billy looks down at the bulge of the case in Bob's top pocket as he rasps out a, "Thanks. For helping. And, uh, for the screwdriver. I, uh, I don't know how much-" he holds out the money, "But I'll get more. I promise. I don't have a job yet but I can-"

But Bob's shaking his head. Still smiling, he gently pushes the money back towards Billy.

"Don't be silly, you did all the work. At a push I could take a dollar for the loan of the tools but, uh, hey, I've got a better idea."

He reaches under the counter, pulling out a sheet of paper which he hands over to Billy.

It's an application form.

"We're pretty busy at the weekends," Bob explains as Billy tries to take it all in, "Gary and Lou handle most of the customers, but I could really do with a hand in the back. Repairs and such."

Bob must see the confusion on Billy's face, because he lets out a little chuckle, "I know, I get it. It's not the jazziest of jobs and I can't say the uniform is especially flattering-" he plucks at the collar of his shirt with a grimace "-but, hey, no one minds if we have the radio on back there, so that's a perk, and I'll teach you all you need to know, you've already proved you're more than capable of it. And I gotta tell you, there's a lot to be said for the job satisfaction." For once in their entire conversation, Bob starts to sound serious, "Just picture it, that whole experience of getting something that looks totally broken, all those pieces in a pile on the workbench, and, to start with, you might not know where anything goes or what all the parts are, even, but you know that if you try, if you figure out what all those pieces do and understand why they broke, well then, all you need is a little time and effort and you'll be able to put it all back together again. And, honestly, you can't beat that feeling, sport, you really can't."

It's a lot. Bob almost seems breathless by the end of his little speech, and Billy averts his eyes, staring down at the form in his hands until the words start to blur.

"There's no pressure, of course," Bob says, resting a gentle hand on Billy's shoulder, just for a moment, "But just think about it."

And Billy does.

He thinks about it a whole lot.

(So much credit for this one goes to @ihni and her wonderful Billy and Bob bonding headcanons. We pretty much came up with this whole thing during one of our many chats, and I've definitely borrowed a few of her ideas, I'm just the one who got round to writing it down first!)

#billy hargrove #cherrywrites #not Harringrove #but there is bob newby!!#he's fine‚ ok? i promise #he's alive and well and he'll be getting a new employee soon. probably #also billy gets found family #and he gets competitive over doing brain teasers with bob on their breaks #it happens. i know it

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charlieswanswife · 3 years ago

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My first NSFW request/prompt ever, but I need it: uniform kink. Kudos if he keeps it on at reader's suggestion. Any format is fine (drabble, oneshot, etc)!

Thank you for requesting! I love this prompt so much I was so excited to work on it :3

A Man In Uniform

"Keep it on."

"What do you mean?"

"Your uniform. I want you to keep it on."

Charlie blinks twice—unable to wrap his head around your words. He had just come home from a long day at work. Eight hour shift that ultimately turned into nine.

Days like these were becoming increasingly common. Especially with the growing number of bear attacks. Cases seemed to pop up everyday. Which meant all the work had been shouldered on the chief of police. It was odd—it was the middle of winter after all, shouldn't bears be in hibernation?

At any rate this whole bear thing has left Charlie under immense stress. Exhausted and crankier than usual. These past couple weeks have been hard with him coming home late. You've grown accustomed to leaving his dinner in the microwave.

Not to mention the dry spell that came along. Charlie was always too exhausted to even touch you let alone fuck you. You couldn't blame him, how could you when he worked so hard? But after a full two weeks with only your hands you were growing desperate.

"Don't tell me this is some perverse kink of yours," he half chuckles, cocking an eyebrow.

You sit on the edge of the bed, twirling a few strands of hair. A pout forms at your lips as your eyes meet his. He's standing tall in front of you, hint of an amused glint in his irises.

"Charlie..." you whine, "Do it for me?"

"Okay sweetie, but only because you asked so nicely," he says. There's a slight smirk underneath that bushy mustache of his.

You offer a smile before your hands go to work on his zipper. All too slowly you begin pulling him out. He's slightly hard already. A soft hiss leaves his lips as your fingers grip his hot shaft.

"I've been thinking about this all day, Charlie," you coo.

"Shit—" One pump and you can feel him growing in your hand, "Me too baby."

You give a tantalizing lick around his tip before taking him in. Your hand continues stroking his shaft as your lips envelope the head. His gaze is dead set on you, studying the way you so eagerly suck him off.

"I'm gonna have to tease you about this some other time—when your lips aren't wrapped around my cock."

A string of saliva connects your bottom lip to his tip as you pull away to offer a smile. "So pretty..." he praises, thumb caressing your lips, "All for me."

Charlie's hand finds the back of your head and your mouth is back on him. Your tongue swirls around his head once more before you take him back in. He's mostly quiet now—save for the occasional groan.

That is until the tip of his cock reaches the back of your throat.

"Oh fuck—" he moans, "That's it...just like that. You take me so fucking well."

Charlie's bucking into your mouth. He doesn't mean to—he just can't help himself. Not when you're blowing him so good. And especially when he knows you can take it.

Tears brim your eyes. You're holding onto his clothed hips with both hands now, fingers hooked onto his belt. The grip on the back of your head has tightened as he fucks your throat. Within a matter of a few more thrusts he pulls away from your aching mouth.

"Need to cum inside you," he mumbles, bending down to reward you with a kiss.

Leaning back down on the bed you spread your legs for him to see. Your panties are soaked and you are more than ready having done most of the prep work—meaning you practically played with yourself all day.

"Please fuck me, officer," you beg.

You would have been embarrassed by your own words had you not been so damn horny.

Something in Charlie ignites and he's pulling your body to his, kissing you with so much vigor. Hands are roaming all over your body before he turns you around on your hands and knees. He's palming your ass, pushing aside your panties as he presses himself against your entrance.

"This what you had in mind when you sent those pictures earlier today?" He groans out, "Those filthy images. You have any idea how hard you made me? All alone in my office."

Charlie teases your heat with his tip.

"I bet those little fingers of yours don't compare to my cock. How many times were you able to get yourself off today?"

"Please—please just put it in..." you cry out, wiggling your ass in the air.

"That's my girl," Charlie praises.

In one swift motion he sinks into you. You let out a high pitched scream at finally being stretched out. His cock is thick and you can feel him throbbing inside you. He's thrusting into you with force, hips smacking against your ass. You bury your head into the pillow to keep yourself from crying out—at the benefit of your neighbors.

"So fucking tight—" Charlie growls. He's holding on to your hips so tight his fingertips might leave indents on your skin.

"Harder!" You chant, matching his pace.

He's thrusting into you faster now, cock hitting that place that has you screaming. Your walls flutter around him, clenching as a wave of ecstasy overcomes you. You shake beneath him, arms giving out as your face hits the pillow.

Charlie's groans are getting increasingly louder as his own movements begin to falter. He's not far behind you and within another minute he's reaching his own climax, spilling his seed deep inside you.

Charlie stills for a moment, wrapping his arms around your waist. He presses his lips to the nape of your neck, basking in your warmth for just a second more before pulling out.

"How come I never knew about this kink of yours?" Charlie asks before disappearing and coming back with a towel from the bathroom.

"Didn't know I had it til a little while ago," you admit.

Charlie chuckles, wiping your thighs himself before pressing a kiss to your temple. "Not til I came along huh?"

#request #charlie swan #charlie swan x reader #team charlie #my writing #twilight renaissance #twilight #charlie swan deserves better #spicy #kinda rushed to finish this tonight #nhl playoff szn you feel #sidenote i totally listened to slipknot while writing this

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bakubub · 3 years ago

Text

In which racer!kuroo is your roommate, and seems to only like it when you treat his wounds... (word count: 1.9k)

Ngl quite proud of this one!!

Warnings: 18+, a whole lot of swearing, a whole lot of blood, innuendos and implied nsfw, reader almost vomits (NOT from pregnancy chill, I know we're all scarred but its going to be just fine) and if you're squeamish perhaps skip the scene where reader stitches his wound?

Also bit of a disclaimer: I am in NO WAY a med student and literally all of my knowledge is from movies and other fics... so if you acc know what to do in this situation this may be a torturous for you :D

All due credits go to @aikk00 for this AMAZING fanart!!!!

I watch as my roommate enters the penthouse, once again scratched up and bleeding, covered in so much blood there is no possible way that it was all his- if it was he would not be standing.

I launch myself off the couch- where I was sitting for the past hour nervously waiting for his return- and slip my arm under his, supporting him as we inched towards the bathroom.

"I can do this by myself you know," he grumbles, his grimace revealing just how much pain he was actually in.

"Mhm, I'm sure you can. Just like you boiled that poor egg by yourself last week, hmm?" I say sarcastically, trying to keep my mind calm and clear, because oh my god it looks really bad this time...

"Oi, its not my fault it fuckin' exploded," he mutters, voice laden with pain.

"You put it in the microwave because 'the shitty water wasn't doing its job.' Of course it would explode," I say, gently seating him on the closed toilet seat and taking out my supplies that I unfortunately have become rather accustomed to using. He's made it a habit to get himself injured.

"Where's the injury?" I ask, setting down my half-empty bottle of antiseptic and box of bandages. He peels off his shirt, cringing at the pain it brought him as the fabric was stuck to the gash that went from his left pectoral down to the middle of his chest.

"Pissed off a bidder after winning a race, fucker took out a knife once he realised he couldn't beat me up," he huffs out, arrogance still lacing his tone even with sweat dripping down his brow as he leans the back of his head onto the tile wall behind him. His Adam's apple bobs down his bloodstained neck as he speaks, and I quickly look away, focusing on the injury at hand.

Not his blood soaked, but nevertheless well defined pectoral muscles, nor the abs that my hands occasionally brush up against and know how hard they really are, and definitely not the trail of black hairs that lead down, down, down...

"What's wrong, the view too hot to focus on the work at hand?" He asks suggestively, raising his pierced brow, even in this state.

I'm quick to reply, having gotten used to his flirtatious remarks from the second I moved into his penthouse, "nope can't even see the view from that massive head of yours. Not to mention your permanent bed head."

He huffs out a laugh, then proceeds to flinch from the pain it must have caused.

"Stop moving, idiot. You're going to exacerbate the cut!" I say, quickly grabbing a damp towel and beginning to clean up his abdomen, whilst simultaneously pressing another rag to his wound to stop the bleeding.

“At least you admit that there is a hot view,” he says in his low voice, gazing at me from his position.

I simply roll my eyes.

No falling in love. That was the deal we had made on the day he offered me a place to stay in exchange for my services as a maid and apparently, a nurse. I cook, clean and basically keep the house running while this moron goes out and acts like the idiot he is. In my defense, dorms are expensive as hell, and his penthouse is nearby. Plus, I don't have to pay rent. It's a win-win situation.

But the feelings stirring up inside my heart might just ruin the dynamic we have going on and simultaneously take out a whole lot of cash out of my pocket.

At least, that's what I keep telling myself.

Once his skin isn't completely saturated in blood, and the wound has (thankfully) stopped bleeding, I add some antiseptic onto a make-up pad and begin to dab at his wound, earning winces and slight grunts from the massive man.

"The cut looks deep, Kuroo. You need to go to the hospital," I say, worry lacing my tone as my eyebrows crease and earn yet another huffing laugh.

"Do you want me to rot in prison for the rest of my life?"

I roll my eyes at his response, deliberately dabbing just a little harder which earns me a yelp and an attempted glare in my direction.

"First off, illegal street racing won't send you to prison for your entire life, just for like, half a year. Second, this wound needs stitches, and believe it or not, I'm not a fucking licensed medic. In fact, the only experience I have is with you!" I say, immediately regretting my choice of words as I wait for his remark.

"That's what she said," He says, chuckling at his own innuendo.

I sigh in frustration, pouring more antiseptic to make sure there was no chance of infection from whatever grimy ass knife stabbed him, and beginning to gently scrub the wound with a soft towel, so as to make sure there was no debris left in there.

"You're gonna have ta do it," he mutters, his hazel eyes boring into mine.

"I- I can't Kuroo, you can't possibly think-"

"Fine. I'll do it. Go get me a needle and thread," he states, struggling but nevertheless, sitting upright on the red stained toilet.

I stare at Kuroo in disbelief as he utters these words. Was he dumber than I thought? Does he have some sort of head injury too?

I examine his face and all I come up with is unnerving determination. I exhale out of my nose sharply, "fine, dammit. I'll sew your fucking wound shut."

I am extremely handy with a sewing needle and thread, used to really be into embroidery back when I had the time so...it should be fine.

He just shrugs, leaning his head back against the tiles and closing his eyes.

"Fucking asshole. Can't believe I'm saving your damn life," I mutter, leaving the bathroom to dig through my wardrobe for my sewing box and taking out a gold silk thread that I was saving for a special project.

Well, I guess that will never happen.

"Hey, I found some silk thread. It's literally known for its strength and durability in high temperatures, so it should work like a charm!" I say, walking back into the blood stained bathroom and trying to psych myself up.

He grunts in response. I sigh as I begin with mopping up the excess blood and sanitising the needle and thread before chucking on gloves.

I wipe the antiseptic over the wound once more, and examine it carefully.

Well, if his condition worsens, I can always knock him out and call an ambulance...

I decide, screw it, and thread the needle, pretending it was just another embroidery project.

It's okay, it's okay, it's okay, I chant as I puncture his skin with the thin needle.

Kuroo gasps in pain, and I place a hand on his knee, telling him to suck it up and deal with it, half talking to him but also to myself.

To my surprise, he listens, stretching his head back once more and gritting his teeth.

"Don't do that, here put this in-between your teeth," I say, grabbing yet another towel and shoving it into his mouth.

He obeys as I continue to stitch. I feel my gag reflex kicking in as I think about how stitching skin feels as though I am stitching leather, it feels hard and tough while pushing the thin needle through.

Must hurt like a bitch.

Once I've completed my neat stitches down the wound, without vomiting, I tie it off as I would with any embroidery, and clean the area free of any remaining blood. After rubbing some antibacterial ointment over the gold stitches, I stick on a particularly large bandage over the wound and start tidying up.

"Thank you," Kuroo mutters, still seated on the toilet seat and practically panting for breath.

"Ah, the criminal knows his damn manners!! Now get up and get in the damn shower. You ruined my pristine bathroom!" I complain, putting the last of the materials away before walking to the door.

"Wait, I- I can't get up." I turn around and look at him incredulously as he utters his next few words, "will you... shower me?"

My eyes just about pop out of their sockets at his request. "Are you insane?! I'm not your mother, nor your wife! Call your pudding haired friend and tell him to come shower you!"

He shakes his head, a rare pleading look taking the place of his usual arrogant smirk, "Kenma's too lazy to shower himself, Y/n, please!"

I contemplated it for a moment. Sure, I've seen him naked before, accidentally of course, and so what if I have to scrub him clean. God knows he can't do it himself with that damn injury.

Fuck this shit.

"Fine, get up right now." I bark at him, leaving to change out of my blood soaked pjs into a pair of shorts and a tank.

"...I just said I can't."

---

"Ow, y/n, you're scrubbing too hard!" He complains, his exfoliating glove around my hand as I rub his toned back clean of any dead skin-cells and blood remains.

"But look how much stuff is coming off!" I say gleefully, enjoying this a little too much.

Kuroo, seated on the built-in bench in the open shower with his red boxers on, looks back to see the satisfaction dripping from my features.

"Are you secretly a sadist?" he whispers. In response, I begin to rinse off his raw back with hot water, causing him to screech like a cat.

"It burns, it burns-”

“Shut the fuck up, moron! It's 4 in the morning, you’re going to annoy our neighbours. I tried very hard to get in their good graces, and Mrs. Suzuki still doesn’t like me! She definitely thinks I’m some kind of hooker…” Kuroo laughs at this, and I can’t help but watch as his whole face brightens up from his usual emotionless expression. I find myself smiling in response.

I grab his expensive shampoo and pour some into my hands, beginning to massage it into his scalp. With wet hair, his raven strands are for once flat on his head and reach down to his defined jawline. Kuroo groans under my touch, leaning into my fingers. I snatch my hands back and pour hot water over his head.

"ARGH! Y/N!" He screams, hastily getting up and wetting me in the process.

"Ah- what are you-" I don't get to finish my question as he grabs my arm and yanks me next to him under the hot water, soaking my clothes and my hair.

"You asshole!" I screech as I reach up to pull his hair in defiance, but he only grabs my arm and hooks it around his neck, leaning down to look directly into my eyes.

Our noses brushing against one another, he mutters, "You look pretty with your hair wet and your shirt see through."

It takes me a moment to get past the compliment and to hear the perverted comment that he just uttered.

He sees my look of confusion and laughs, bends over, clutches his stomach and laughs, before bellowing in pain because of his injury.

Smiling smugly down at him as he grimaces, I force him to sit back down and continue massaging the shampoo into his hair, warning him that if he so much as moaned I would leave him in here, dripping wet and in pain.

"That's what he said," is his reply.

I smack his head in response.

Notes, interactions and reblogs are highly appreciated <3

#kuroo x reader #haikyuu drabbles #racer!kuroo #kuroo tetsuro scenarios #haikyu fics #haikyuu!!#kuroo x y/n #kuroo x gender neutral reader #kuroo x gn!reader #kuroo x you

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myafterlifeisbetterthenyours · 3 years ago

Text

OBSESSIVE STOLAS x Male Imp pt.5

(Hold up!!! Before you read this, at the bottom I've left links to the first 4 parts. Go read them first, so youve got all the back story.)

((This is a long fanfic and will consist of multiple parts.)

True to your word, you sent him the address later that day.

You agreed to meet up in the afternoon, telling him the meeting up time to meet.

Stolas had suggested a dinner date, but you had turned that down for some reason, telling him you had a better idea.

You had actually asked him on a date.

So happy was he, the rest of the day seemed to pass in the blink of an eye, the owl caught in a blissful haze.

Eventually it was dinner time, where the prince found himself eating alone, again.

He hadn't eaten with his family since, well you know.

He chose something simple.

Leftovers.

Grabbing the plate of last night's roast, he popped them into the microwave.

As he waited for his meal to heat, he quickly scrolled through his phone.

He was checking your voxtigram again, enjoying the collection of photos of you.

As he looked through he found the picture of you and Blitzø, the sight sending a pang of regret through his chest.

It was strange to think, just a day ago, he'd been head over heels for the Imp. Totally infatuated with him, and now... now he knew the truth.

Blitzø saw him as a meal ticket,nothing more.

He was just way to get to the living realm. What an idiot he'd been, a few kind words, a bit of sex there and he was totally under Blitzøs spell. He felt like an idiot.

His eyes shifted to you, and such warmth bloomed through his chest.

But you. You were genuine. You didn't want money or power, you wanted to make him happy.

You wanted to actually spend time with him, he wasn't just a meal ticket to you, he was someone worthy of love an attention.

He knew you weren't in love with him, not yet, but you would be, he'd show you just how worthy he was of your love.

His thoughts were interrupted by his dinner finished heating up.

He ate in silence, Stolas spending the whole time staring at the pictures of you.

After dinner he went for a shower, the hot water cascading down his body, the heat reminding him of the warmth you brought him just a day ago.

His thought slid to his time with you, fantasising about how intimate, how delicate and seductive you'd been.

The complete opposite of Blitzø.

His thighs ground together, his breath picking up as he slid a hand between his thighs.

He imagined you, holding him close, treating him like that delicate work of art, bringing him pleasure he didn't know existed.

Pleasure racked his body, his breathing hitched. And before he knew it, a mind shattering orgasm wracked his body.

After recovering from his little self pleasuring, he cleaned himself up and got out of the shower.

Walking into his room, he fell on his bed, feeling quiet satisfied. Curling up in bed, he fantasied about what the next day could hold for him.

He had a dreamless sleep that night waking up later than he had the morning prior, finding himself again, well rested.

Getting up, he went about his usual morning routine, all the way until he chose his outfit.

You had said something about wine, so did that mean it was more of a fine dining establishment. But you had said a pizza place right? So was it more of a casual, family restaurant.

He spent nearly half an hour thinking it over before he just decided to text you.

Stolas: Is there a dress code for tonight? I'm just picking out my outfit and don't want to come over dressed, I want something that to wow! you.

(Y/N): Hehehe, not really. Pick something casual and probably bring a coat as well, It gets kinda chilly out there at night.

(Y/N): We'll only be staying at the restaurant to eat, then I've got something planned for afterwards elsewhere.

Stolas: Is that so? And what have you got planned, something exciting I hope.

(Y/N): Nu uh, no hints. You'll just have to wait till tonight.

Stolas: Not even a little hint? 🥺🥺🥺

(Y/N): Nope, but I can promise it'll at least be the most romantic thing an Imp has ever done for you.

That kinda stung, bringing many unwanted memories to the forefront of his mind. You quickly texted again,

(Y/N): Fuck, I'm sorry, I didn't mean anything like that. I just, doubt an Imp like me could match the typical royal date.

Stolas: it's alright, I understand what you meant.

(Y/N): But I can promise it'll be the most romantic thing someone's done with you on a budget.

Stolas actually laughed at that, falling onto his bed like a teenager. The two of you exchanged a little more info, before he finally picked an outfit.

He chose a fairly simple outfit; A stylish pair of jeans, a simple red and black T-shirt with a rather attractive heart pattern across it and then it was one of his favourite leather jackets with a beautiful fur collar

He left the manor grounds just as the sun began to set, the city night-life around the manor already beginning to pick up.

It was a fairly short drive, most people knowing to stay out of the way of a royal limousines.

Finding the street and location you'd described, he had the limo park in front of a rather unassuming building, not really looking any different from the hundred other boarded up buildings on the block.

Getting out, he stood there for a few minutes before he heard you call out. 'Hey good lookin, looking for a good time?' Turning around, he found you approaching.

You carried a simple wicker basket, wearing a humble, yet fitting attire,

You wore a stylish black T-shirt that seemed to just cling to all the right places, your jeans were faded, but not enough to warrant throwing out. And a pair of simple black shoes.

When you got closer, the demon piped up, 'If you were planning a picnic, the basket kind of gives it away.' He told you playfully.

You released a laugh, shaking your head. 'Nah, all that's already set up. I just don't wanna carry everything from here to there by hand.' You told him simply.

'Ooooh' he cood, 'and what is it your getting here, hmm?' He asked, playfully gesturing to the building.

'Oh you know, this and that, you'll be surprised how much they serve here.' You told him just as playful.

Stolas stood up before looking around, 'Speaking of what they serve here', I can't help but wonder where "here" is, this doesn't exactly look like a restaurant.' He told you, gesturing to the rather dull wall of buildings before you.

You just chuckled, looking up at the prince before telling him, 'Dont judge a book by its cover, dear prince of mine' you told him playfully.

You hadn't realised it, but when you called him yours, it sent a wave of euphoria through the owl that he simply couldn't describe.

His mind was addled, the owl clutched himself as he watched you speak, to caught up in this feeling to catch what you said.

He was snapped from his stupor, when he found you were looking up at him, seemingly expecting a response.

The owl panicked, snapping to attention and blurting out, 'Of course, words to live by,' before he just stood there, smiling like an idiot.

You stared at him for several moments, the awkwardness so palpable you could practically see it in the air.

After another moment, Stolas shook his head, 'S-sorry, uh, what was that last thing?' He asked, trying to salvage the situation.

You chuckled, shaking your head, 'nothin, let's go shall we?' You asked him, stepping forward.

He followed close behind, following you into a nearby alleyway.

He followed in silence, but as your path grew longer he decided to ask where you were going. Only for you to suddenly stop and turn towards a large metal shudder.

Looking up at him, you did a little knock on the shudder, before just standing there.

A few minutes pass by before Stolas whispered, 'what are we waiting for?'

You laughed at that, before telling him, 'He always takes a minute to get here... any second now.'

A few seconds go by, just as Stolas was gonna pipe up again, the shudder suddenly shot up, revealing an middle aged Imp carrying a shotgun.

The Imp stared at him for a few moments before looking down and spotting you, 'Oh (Y/n)! Didnt expect you so early.' He told you, lowering the shotgun, 'who's the string bean?' He asked bluntly.

You just laughed as Stolas became indignant, looking himself up and down before asking himself if he really look like a string bean?

''This is my...' you hesitated for a moment, the owl held his breath, waiting for you to finish the sentence

'... my date' you finished, 'this is my date "Prince" Stolas.' You told him firmly, enough pride in your voice to make Stolas flush.

The Imp looked him up and down, 'A prince huh? Damn (Y/n), really pickin up your game' The older Imp gave you a rather lecherous grin.

You scoffed, stepping forward and asking 'Can we come in or are we just gonna stand around talking all night?'

The elder Imp just huffed before stepping out of the way.

The two of you walked into a somewhat narrow stairwell, the prince having to crouch walk to squeeze in there.

'Sorry 'bout the tight fit there your highness, we usually only get Imps down here, it'll be more roomy downstairs.' The old Imp spoke up as they made there way down the stairs.

Stolas chose not to reply, choosing instead to just take it in stride.

It was another minute of walking down the cramped stairwell when they suddenly entered a much larger chamber, the owl able to stand up.

Once he'd stretched his back, Stolas got a good look around, and found himself transfixed by the splendour of the place.

Honestly the place could probably give most of the restaurants he'd been too a run for there money.

It was a large hall, clearly some old structure with black bricks making up most of the walls.

A number of quaint little lanterns hung from the roof giving the whole chamber a pleasantly dim atmosphere.

A series of tables filled the centre of the chamber, each one decked in a cloth, with its very own candle lit center piece.

The architecture created smaller arches along the walls, many of them gave way to small booths where other Imps were enjoying there meal. While others were filled in by wine wracks, each one filled with a variety of bottles.

'My it's... it's...' before Stolas could finish, you cut in, 'yeah... I know, it's not exactly the rits, but for an Imp run business, it's pretty sophisticated.' You seemed disappointed, likely having interpreting his stunned silence as disappointment.

Stolas quickly cleared that up, telling you 'it's beautiful, I've never seen a place like it.' He told you honestly.

Looking down he found you positively beaming.

Reaching out, you grabbed his hand. You dragged him along like an excited child, taking him to what was obviously the front desk.

Placing the wicker basket on top the counter, you binged the bell.

A moment passed before a shorter and clearly much older Imp walked out. Upon seeing you there face lit up, 'Oh (Y/N), so good to see you.' They said cheerfully, pulling out a medium leather bound book from under the counter, they looked up and said, 'Lets see. Ah! Here you are. One table. A high ceiling and a strong bottle, correct?' They asked pleasantly.

You just nodded, them quickly putting the book away and began leading you away.

He found himself led into another chamber, this one much smaller but still just as pleasant.

In this one, a quaint little chandelier, giving the room a pleasant warm glow.

The older Imp quickly left, promising to bring menu's upon his return.

You led him in 'Beautiful place, isn't it?' You asked, seeming a hundred miles away.

'It is' He agreed, never taking his eyes off of you.

It took a few moments, but eventually you locked eyes, a smile growing across your lips.

After a moment, you seemed to snap back to reality, quickly walking over and pulling out one of the chairs, 'Your highness' you told him, an almost seductive tone to your voice.

'Such a gentleman' he spoke playfully, taking his seat.

Pushing him in, you walked around and took your seat.

Sitting down, you leaned forward, the two of you sitting in silence for a moment, neither of you sure what to say.

Eventually you spoke up, 'Can... can I ask you something?' You asked hesitantly.

Stolas, seeing the mood shift, leaned forward, responding with 'of course you can... what is it?'

You took a moment, placing your mouth behind your balled fist, 'I just... I just want to know... What is this?' You asked somberly.

That took him off guard, 'I, uh... I thought this was a date,' he tried to lighten the mood.

You did smile at that, but it was short lived, the sombre look returning.

'No... I mean like, you and me. What is this?' You asked him.

Stolas found himself at a loss.

What were you?

This was a date, wasn't it? So that would make you a potential couple? But he was already married... so, what the hell did that make you?

He sat there for longer than he'd like without an answer, before he felt he just had to say something. 'I don't... I don't know.' He told you honestly.

'I mean, this is a date? And I uh...' He didn't know were to go.

Out of options, he decided to do something that hadn't gone the best for him lately, but with you he felt it would be his best course to take.

He was gonna go with his gut.

'I want there to be something.' He told you, 'You make me feel like... like I deserve to be loved. Like I can be loved... Something I haven't felt in quiet a while.'

'I haven't felt like I really deserve anything in... Hell.... Decades?' He was tearing up now, his voice thick with emotion, 'I don't know if I deserve love, (Y/N).'

'I only ever seem to end up hurting the people I care about.' Tears formed in his eyes, the owl gripped his head, 'Lately I feel like a curse. Like I can only bring pain and misery to those around me... and after what I've done, I can't help but feel I deserve it.'

He looked up at you, a little smile across his face, 'But you... you make me feel like... like someone cares about me... Like someone cares about what I want. And you don't want anything from me... your not just using me as a means to an end... You care about me.' He was shaking now, a gentle tear sliding down his cheek.

He sat there for a moment, on the brink of tears, just as he felt you grab his hand.

Looking down he found you gently grasping his hand. You slowly inspected it, gently running your fingers along the long slender digits.

'You know...' you began, unease in your voice. 'I had no idea what I was doing, that first time.'

'I wanted to cheer you up, make you smile.' You let out a little chuckle, 'And as cliché as it might sound, I could tell you just wanted someone to love you, to make you feel something.' you smiled up at him.

'I knew you needed some kind of affection and I... I couldn't just let you sit there, drowning in despair. So I did it, I gave you the love you needed' You told him, your voice getting a little unbalanced.

You looked up at him, your throat tightening and voice becoming shaky, 'And if after that first time together... I after what we did... you had said you wanted to just pretend like nothing happened. I would have accepted it. I could have accepted that.' You told him firmly.

'Theres so much misery around me, so many suffering for no real reason. So if I could make you happy, even for just a moment. I'd be happy.' A smile spreading across your face.

'I don't know what's gonna happen next.' You told him. 'And I don't know what's gonna happen next.'

Your voice grew firmer, as did your resolve. 'But I wanna get closer to you and you wanna get closer to me. So how's about we just... see where this goes?' You asked him.

Stolas was a little shocked, 'You... you'd really do that, just give it a shot, to be with me?' He asked incredulously.

You just nodded your head, a little smile across your face, 'I... I wanna be with you Stolas, if that's alright with you?' You asked almost playfully.

Stolas couldn't help but laugh, vigorously nodding his head, 'Yes, Yes, a thousand times Yes.' He told you getting to his feet.

His emense height allowing him to lean over the table, locking you into a passionate kiss.

The Owl couldn't help it, he pressed into the kiss, so much so he was scared he might hurt your lips.

But he just couldn't help it, he was feeling such passion right now, all he could think to do was get as close to you as possible.

Hey Hey. Doing some old stories now. I've got so many requests I think I'll just relax a little, do them at my own pace.

This is the 5th part of my series Here's the link to my other chapters

OBSESSIVE STOLAS X Male Imp Pt.1

OBSESSIVE STOLAS x Male Imp Pt.2

OBSESSIVE STOLAS X Male Imp Pt.3

OBSESSIVE STOLAS x Male Imp pt.4

so check that out. I'm gonna be doing some more of my own original works lately, but feel free to leave a request, just don't expect me to get to it any time soon. Any way, hope you enjoyed the story. Bye Bye.

#helluva boss headcanon #helluva boss #headcanon #x reader #helluva boss x reader #helluva stolas #stolas x reader #stolas

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tsui-no-sora · 2 years ago

Note

Hello hi how are you :))

I've been meaning to send this for a while but I'm too busy so you can take your time answering because oof.

Anyway I've been thinking about cDream who's been blind. All the time. From the begging and during the manhunts. Maybe he has a horrible scar across his face and that's why he has the mask, or maybe he just doesnt want people to see or know. But yea.

I've been thinking about him a lot I have a lot of ideas I'm buzzing like a microwave.

Also the fucking face reveal is happening and I'm still somehow alive so that's something

I got this exactly the day my teacher is checking notebooks so I literally don't have anything to do this whole hour so Hi Hey I'm well how are you I missed talking to you about this concepts is really so much fun

I been so busy as well but we are both surviving it and that's what matters

And dude we are officially in the final line before our lives Dream's and all of his friends too change forever you know how insane that is after two years that I been on this fandom we are finally gonna get to see them meet you don't know how excited I am as well for their friends to finally get to see him as well dream sounded so happy already and I bet he's only gonna be happier now :)))

Ohh c!Dream who doesn't lose his eyesight during the prison c!Dream who's simply blind I really love that headcanon

I like to think he would have a scar in his face post Techno Duel I can picture c!Techno seeing his mask break and Dream's eyes and just thinking well the more you know before striking him down

But before that he just doesn't wanna show it so much but in the smp where he feels safe and relaxed with all of his dfiends who already know who he is

He would take his mask off from time to time and just exist like that, he would also steak George's goggles all the time and hid them from him. I can picture him taking Sapnap's bandana and tying it around his eyes just to make a silly joke.

I can also picture him being so anxious because he doesn't see but he can hear he can sense things around him, and just listening in as there's random noises he doesn't know where they are coming from inside the prison.

Or being super alarmed when Ponk and Bad took CPK to visit Pandora's.

Plus Techno having to knock multiple times in the glass because Dream can't see him and he can hear the lava moving but he doesn't know who's coming up from behind it and honestly he can't tell when things are actually making noise around him and when he's starting to picture things that aren't there (BTW I'm still insane about the implication that Sam drugging him during prison to make him confess things was a possibility)

Quackity making it a sort of game trying to be as quiet as possible to keep Dream trying to guess where the strike is coming from and Dream can always guess but he can tell Quackity likes it more when he pretends to not get it, and he needs to do everything he can to keep him entertained to keep him coming here everyday because if he doesn't if Quackity gets bored if he deems him unworthy he's going to kill him.

Also him being so so scared when he enters the fake cell that Quackity and Sam put together outside for him, because it's wrong and he can't tell how or why but something is happening and all of a sudden hes caught again and was he even ever free then

I also imagine him completely lashing out at Wilbur afterwards when he sneaks behind him and whispers on his ear and then reprimanding himself for not listening in properly and almost dying again

The new people don't know that Dream is blind Punz does know and he makes sure to never startle him

Quackity only finds out he's blind after his first vivist when he breaks Dream's mask

I also like to think about blind c!Ranboo and c!Dream the concept makes me happy also blind c!Dream who trails his hands on c!Tubbo's face and scars to memorize them during his presidency to show he does want to meet him he does want to be friends the fact that it also aligns with his Plan does help tho.

#about c!Dream c!Sam and c!Quackity #you know just to clarify #only about the DSMP characters #during all of this i just kept picturing Dream and Tommy playing tag for some reason #now my brain is gonna buzz like a microwave too thank you #percy tag #beloved's asks

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everyhowlmarksthedead · 4 years ago

Text

❛ RAINY DESERT ❜

with Hank ‘Tranq’ Loza.

Request: HERMANA acabo de ver que estás taking requests for tranq, and maybe is too late pero por si acaso how about tranq x younger reader (25 or so) having a soft day or a nice date, like cuddles, watching films together... Thank youuuuuuu💖💖💖💖

BY @aquamento

Warnings: none.

Word count: about 1.3k

Aurora says: this writing hasn't been edited, you may find some grammar mistakes, I'm sorry about that!

Gif credits: @angels-reyes

Masterlist.

📱to Bish✨:

“Hey, prez. I was thinking about stealing you my man. It's gonna rain and I already finished at the hospital, so I would like to spend the afternoon on my sofa doing nothing, but cuddling as fuck till it hurts”.

📱 from Bish✨:

“Don't you want to level up to El Presidente? Maybe, adopt me?”

📱 to Bish✨:

“I change you my man, for a delicious lunch tomorrow”.

📱 from Bish✨:

“I already kicked his big ass outta my club, querida. But now that you said so…”

Leaving your phone over the passenger's seat, with a triumphant smile drawn on your lips. You have the window down, with an elbow nailed there and the other over the steering wheel, thanking to have taking the automatic car this morning, because your hands are a little sleepy after a long, long day. But your reward is coming, and you can't ask for anything else. Turning to the left on the main avenue of Santo Padre, you slow down the velocity, as if you had all the time in the world, stopping some minutes after for a red light. Palming your lap following the rhythm of the song playing through the radio, while you sing it so concentrated, the strong buzz of an engine pushes you back to reality. Resting both arms on the door and your chin over them, you can't help but smile like a teen in love with a soft sigh escaping out from your lips.

“You kill me every time you do that”. Stopping his motorbike next to your car, he takes off the sunglasses for a second.

“Hm…” You just say, so absorbed that you can't even talk.

“That smile”. Hank points at it, before poking your nose, making you wrinkle it.

Leaning towards your car, you stick your head out of the window to reach his lips with a smooth kiss that pushes you to heaven. You met him almost four years ago, but it wasn't until two years after that you dared to tell each other about your feelings. Since then, you are inseparable. And his brothers consider you one more of the Mayan family, so you can take some advantage with it sometimes. Like this one.

As soon as you are at the porch of your shared house, you step out from your car taking your phone and your bag, and walking to your boyfriend with both arms raised so it's easier for him to lift you up between his. Wrapping his waist with both legs, you can hear him chuckling while you fill up his face with kisses, leading his steps to the main door. Four years, and you are still falling for him a little more every day. Sometimes you wish to not have been such jerks, hiding what you were feeling because of the fear of the age difference, being almost twenty years between both. But age is just a number, and you couldn't ever regret being together.

In the meantime Hank takes a shower, you change your clothes for one of his big shirts, wrinkling the neckline of it between your fingers to have a soft sniff of the scent. You love to wear them, mostly when he's out of your hometown. Coming back to the kitchen, you tuck in the microwave the popcorn packet to set it for three minutes, putting whilst some beers to get cold in the fridge. Making sure that the big window in the living room is open and the fluffy blanket is already over the back rest, you look for some action movie on Netflix. All you want to do is to lie down on the sofa, and spend the rest of the day and the whole night eating junk food and curled up under Tranq's strong arms.

When the microwave dings, you're careful taking off the popcorn to put them inside a big bowl, grabbing two beers and some chocolate bars, to bring them all to the coffee table close to the sofa. Sitting there, you wait for your boyfriend to join you, hearing the first drops of water falling from the clouds.

“Make me some space”. Hank says then, standing you up to lie down and welcoming you after between his arms, stucking his chest to your back.

Throwing the blanket over you two, accommodating it to cover your bodies, he places a leg above yours sinking his nose into your neck. Moving backwards a hand to his nape, you feel him hugging you tightly leaving some kisses on your shoulder.

“I couldn't ask for a better plan”. He mutters.

“I only have good ideas, baby”. You chuckle, caressing his tattooed forearm with your fingertips.

“Like being my girl”. Sighing then, the mexican leans forward to loudly kiss your cheek, while you press play to start the movie.

Actually, you never focus too much on the tv, getting lost in your thoughts because of his strokes in your hair, neck or belly; always being so gentle and dearly, that you don't care about anything else, ending up falling asleep under his grip. You have needed it since some days ago, when you had to attend a multiple accident with four cars and more than a dozen badly injured people. And he never complains about it, without stopping his caresses to make you feel more relaxed.

Next time you open your eyes, Netflix has paused itself. Raising your sleepy eyes to the huge window, you see how much is raining for the first time in months. Obviously, it's not a common thing living in the middle of the Calexico desert. The smell of wet sand floods your lungs, giving you some nice chills down your backbone, it reminds you of those years studying in Los Angeles and the good moments there. Stretching a hand over the table to check the hour in your phone, you start to feel somewhat hungry. It's almost dinner time and you know that you're not going to sleep too much tonight after such a long nap. Turning under Tranq's arms, you find him peacefully sleeping yet. His warm breath colliding against your face, while you set an arm under his neck, stroking his cheek with your free fingers. You can't help but stare at him for some seconds, before leaning to peck his lips with soft kisses, until he starts to return every one with a smile growing on his face.

“You feel better than earlier?”

“Yes”. You simply reply, non stopping kissing him.

“How is that?” He teases you, slowly opening his eyes.

“My man's arms are my safe place”.

“Oh, really?”

“Yeah, really”. You nod, raising up both eyebrows. He puckers up his lips in concordance, listening to you so convinced of your words. “I was thinking about going to Paco's food truck and taking away some dinner, what do you think?”

You are too lost on the way your forefinger roams his bottom lip, that you don't hear him agreeing until he bites it and repeats what he said.

“I think I'm going to have to drive…” He laughs, feeling your cheeks burning a little. “What's up with rainy days, ah?”.

“They just turn me a little fluffier than normal”.

“Yeah, I see that, and I like it”.

Pressing his lips over yours, tightening his arms around you, he tucks his tongue into your mouth, gently caressing yours for some long seconds until you two are out of air. Resting your head on the cushion, you lean just a little to kiss his forehead, before hugging him. It's true. His arms are your safe place, always making you feel better, always making you feel loved. You don't know a better place to be in, because it doesn't exist.

“I love you, Hank. So, so much”. You whisper then, with your eyes fixed on the dark ones.

“I love you too, mi amor”. He says back without hesitating, holding your chin with one of his hands to push you closer. “I can't explain how much, but I'm going to show it to you every day”.

✨ Tag list:

@starrynite7114 @chibsytelford @dazzledamazon @mara-mpou @sammskellington @gemini0410 @1-800-imagines @briana-mishell24 @sassymox @aquamento @sadeyesgf @viviansafizada @samcrobae @jade770 @witchy-wish @rebel-without-cause-x @xx--day-dreamer--xx @spiced-reads @tita127 @ifoundmyhappythought @enamouravecleslivresetlechocolat @angelxshiba @destynelseclipsa @sheeshgivemeabreak @abbiesthings @knowles-morgan @lady-pswrld @minnicelli @marquelapage @bigcreatorwombatdreamer @jadesamhart @mycupoffanfiction @claytoncardenasbabymama @thesandbeneathmytoes @phoenixhalliwell @thewarriorprincessxo @sugary-x-sweet @multiyfandomgirl40 @imanerdychubbyqueen @iambabyharry @firebenderwolf @itsanofrommesir @noz4a2 @peaches007 @edonaspanca @irenne-stans @skyofficialxx

If you want to be tagged, send me a message!

#mayans mc x reader #mayans mc #mayans mc imagine #mayans x reader #hank tranq loza #hank tranq loza x reader #tranq loza #tranq loza x reader

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lloydskywalkers · 5 years ago

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Hey, I sent this ask once already but I don't think it went through??? (If it did I apologize for bugging you!) I read this fic you wrote a while ago about Lloyd and Ronin talking during season 5 after that part where Morro sends that fake message, and I'd like to read it again but I can't find it? Could you link it please? Sorry again for bothering you.

Hey no don’t worry about it, I’m glad you asked!! One, because I’m almost positive Tumblr ate your other ask; and two, because I am a hundred percent positive Tumblr also ate that particular fic :’) I was going to just repurpose it for a later season 5 fic, but I’ll go ahead and post it below the cut in case you’d like to read it a whole lot sooner XD

If Lloyd was any less exhausted right now, he’d have some choice words for Morro about shoving him in a cage, of all things.

Because really, of all things, a cage? Again? Morro’s so proud of himself and his precious plan, he could at least get creative while he’s at it. Spice Lloyd’s life up a little every once in a while, instead of sticking with the same stupid routine every other person who’s ever gone after his powers has.

But unfortunately, Lloyd is so bone-tired right now he doesn’t even know if he could manage a glare hot enough for Morro, and if he’s going to pick a fight with him, he’d like to be able to finish it without passing out from sheer exhaustion in the middle. He’s been humiliated enough, and he’s clinging to the meager shreds of his pride he has left with a stubbornness.

A stubbornness that’s fading faster than he’d like, so when it takes Ronin three tries before Lloyd realizes he’s saying something to him, it feels a bit like rubbing salt in a wound.

“Huh?” he manages, scrubbing at his eye and wincing as the bruise behind it throbs. His vision clears a bit, at least, enough to where Ronin stops looking as much like a brown blob on the floor and more like…well, Ronin, tied up on the floor.

Right, he remembers, with a sinking pit of ice in his stomach. They’d used Ronin to send a message to the others. The thought of his team heading into a trap makes his stomach writhe into painful knots, and he struggles to sit up, as much as he can in the cramped cage.

“I asked if you were alive up there,” Ronin’s saying. He still looks pale and shaken from when Morro possessed him earlier, but his voice sounds firmer than it did, less like the trembling rasp he’d tried to curse Morro out with before he’d left them both alone.

Save your strength. I’ll be needing it.

Morro’s words float through Lloyd’s head like particularly unwelcome knives, and he shoves the thought of what’s coming away.

“I’m—” his attempt at a reply cuts off in harsh coughing, his throat dry and scratchy from hosting Morro’s voice as much as he has. And probably from the lack of hydration. That might have something to do with it. “Yeah, m’alive,” he finally manages, his voice thin.

“Figured that, with all the racket up there,” Ronin says, but there’s a note of relief in his voice.

Lloyd doesn’t know what to say back to that, so he shuts his mouth, staring hazily at the bars of the cage as they blur and swim in his vision. Ronin doesn’t say anything either, save for an occasional huff as he twists his arms in his bonds, rubbing his hands together as if to quell the small tremors that still run through them. Lloyd studies him closer, how unnaturally grey his color still is, and his stomach twists again. He knows too well how that feels.

Maybe he should have picked that fight.

Lloyd bites his lip, slumping back against the cage bars. “I’m sorry,” he murmurs, and he hates how young he sounds.

Ronin tilts his head up at him, the corners of his eyes creasing. “What are you sorry for?” he says. “You’ve got it a lot worse than me, kid.”

“Well— maybe, but—” Lloyd stutters. “It’s my…if I hadn’t…I should’ve fought back. When he possessed you, and…everything else.”

“In your shape?” Ronin eyes him, and Lloyd shrinks under his scrutiny. “You look like death warmed over. In a busted microwave. Nice sentiment, kid, but there’s no sense in gettin’ yourself trashed for me.”

“I wouldn’t have gotten trashed,” Lloyd mutters, crossing his arms tighter around himself.

“Yeah, you would’ve, already have,” Ronin scoffs. “You’re just like the rest of ‘em, suicidal hero kids, all of you.”

“I’m the Green Ninja,” Lloyd snaps, hoping desperately that Ronin doesn’t catch the waver in his voice. “I’m not — I should be able to take him. I shouldn’t be here, I should—“

“Please,” Ronin cuts over him, sounding tired. “You’re what, ten?”

Lloyd blinks rapidly, before scowling. “I’m fourteen.”

“—fourteen, FSM help me.” Ronin runs a hand over his forehead, trailing it down to pinch the bridge of his nose. He shakes his head, going silent for a beat.

“Fourteen,” he repeats, voice quieter. “FSM.”

Lloyd doesn’t know what to say back to that, either. He feels very small and a bit stupid, which is kind of how he’s been feeling all the time lately, and he’s not a fan.

“Still should’ve stopped him,” he finally mumbles, wrapping his arms around his legs so he can rest his chin on his knees.

“You couldn’t’ve stopped him,” Ronin says, bluntly. “Morro’s crazy, kid. He’s hellbent on that Green Ninja thing, and he’s the kinda hellbent that gets people killed.”

Lloyd frowns. “It’s my title. It’s my job, I want to be able to keep it—“

“Could you kill someone for it?”

Lloyd flinches back, eyes going wide. “Wha— no! No, I couldn’t — wouldn’t, I’m not — I don’t—“

“There you go, kid,” Ronin sighs, cutting over Lloyd’s floundering. “Morro doesn’t care how many people he has to get rid of, so long as he gets that gi. He’s always gonna have that upper hand on you. Different playing fields.”

Lloyd stares at him, taken aback. He’s never thought about it like that before, and he doesn’t think he’d like to. Just because Morro’s more — more bloodthirsty, or whatever, doesn’t mean he’s stronger. It doesn’t mean Lloyd won’t fight for the green gi.

Lloyd presses his lips together. “That doesn’t mean — I’d still fight for it. I-I’d die for it, if I had to.”

“I bet you would,” Ronin snorts, without humor. “But you won’t kill anyone else. Death is only on the board if it’s yours. You’re the worst kind of selfless type, I’ve seen it before.”

Lloyd chews on his lip, at a loss. Talking with Ronin is confusing, he decides, too confusing for the headache that’s building behind his eyes, at least. He keeps ending up lost for words, and he doesn’t like that. Doesn’t like feeling wrong-footed, though that’s definitely nothing new—

“You shouldn’t,” Ronin suddenly says.

“Huh?”

“Die for it,” he continues, sounding insistent now. “You shouldn’t. Don’t. Your life’s worth a lot more than some scrap of green, kid.”

Lloyd tilts his head, momentarily thrown by the direction the conversation’s turned. “I…I don’t want to,” he admits, weakly. “I just—“

“Then don’t,” Ronin interrupts, bluntly. “Stay alive. Fight dirty if you have to, you’re Garmadon’s kid. Don’t let your family’s never-ending fling with destiny take you down with ‘em.”

“That’s not — I’m not trying to die,” Lloyd insists, irritated now.

“And you got people waiting for you,” Ronin continues, ignoring him. “Your team, y’know, they’re real anxious to get you back.” A flicker of emotion crosses his face, almost like regret. “They’re uh. Puttin’ up a real fight for ya, kid.”

Lloyd squeezes his eyes shut tightly, fighting back the sudden burn. “I know they are.”

“Good thing, then. So just, uh. Don’t give up on ‘em, okay? Be a real shame if they gave me this much trouble for nothing.”

Yeah, I’ll bet they gave you trouble, Lloyd thinks, his throat tightening. He shakes his head, blinking back the burn in his eyes. Enough. His family’s out there, fighting for him, and that’s enough for him.

“I’m not gonna die,” he says fiercely, dragging the fire that’s left in him from the smoldering embers in his chest. “I’m gonna beat him. And then I’m going to end the Cursed Realm, before it ever gets here. And I am not. Going to die.”

Ronin’s eyes flash with an emotion Lloyd can’t name, but he nods, seemingly satisfied. He turns away, the scars on his cheek standing out as he stares through the clouded window.

“You know what’s in the Cursed Realm, right, kid?”

Ronin’s voice is gravely, rough in ways that makes Lloyd think of the hardened kind of people he’d run into on the streets occasionally. People who were used to life going the worst way possible, and were ready for it. He used to want to be one of those people. Now he thinks he might be scared he’s going to get his wish.

But there’s an undercurrent of what could be sympathy in Ronin’s voice, if Lloyd looks for it. He swallows.

“Yeah,” he mumbles. “Yeah, I know.”

“You good with ending that, too?”

Lloyd swallows again, and this time it gets stuck in his throat.

“I have to be, I guess,” he whispers.

Ronin closes his eyes, leaning his head back against the wooden wall, and Lloyd feels kind of like he used to when he’d turn a test in at Darkley’s, and had no idea whether he’d passed or failed. “S’what I thought.”

Lloyd turns his head away, biting his lip hard enough to taste metal.

He doesn’t know what to say to that, either, so he doesn’t say anything more.

He’s supposed to be saving his strength, after all.

#answered #my fic #technically #i think this is one of three ill-fated fics tumblr decided to eat #not a fan of the lloyd angst i guess #Anonymous

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binbogummy · 4 years ago

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Jimothen would absolutely take FK and Parsley camping! Since Dallas drives out, I can't imagine he'd pass a chance to tag along - and I imagine Parsley would be more willing if FK was there. His dad is a lot and everyone know it! Manly camping!!!

I just want to say thank you so much for this request I had a lot of fun with it!

• Out of all the father son bonding time Parsley is forced into, camping is his least favorite. He's not a very outdoorsy person at all. The bugs, the burnt food, sleeping on the ground; it's not exactly his idea of a good time and Jimothan's insistence on roughing it as much as possible only makes it worse.

• Jimothan proudly brought up their upcoming yearly trip at the Lounge one day and you mentioned that you hadn't been in a while and that camping sounded like a lot of fun. This immediately caught Parsley's attention and he was quick to suggest you come along with them.

• Jimothan was surprisingly okay with this idea as well. He'd always been so insistent on it being a father-son trip but he was already proudly blustering on about showing you how to pitch a tent "the right way".

• Parsley on the other hand was just happy to have someone to suffer with. And who knows, his dad might even tone it down a notch with you around. He almost felt bad, you had no idea what you were getting yourself into.

• A few days later while hanging out with Dallas you mentioned getting to tag along with them and he congratulated you, wistfully mentioning how much he loved group camping trips. A few minutes later and you're making a call to Parsley asking if there was room for one more

• Jimothan remembered Dallas from their time at the Habitat but overall didn't know much about the guy besides what he usually orders at the bar.

"I don't know, the kid's one thing but we only have so much room in the truck. You ever been camping before, son?"

"Allll the time, daddy-O~ The mystique of the forest really scratches the id, y'know? Makes for a excellent atelier~"

"What in the sam hill does that-"

"He goes there to paint." You clarified "Oh and don't worry about space! We can just take Dallas's bus, he's got plenty of room."

Dallas flashed Jimothan the "OK" symbol and though he still looked reluctant, Parsley was already on board and looking more excited about going camping than he had in a long time.

"I'm just happy I don't have to ride in the bed of the pickup this year." Parsley sighed in relief.

"Oh don't complain. I always tell you; the Breeo X Series 19 Firemaster has to sit up front with me for safe keeping."

• When it comes to actually camping, Jimothan is old fashioned but impressively efficient. When you pick out a spot and begin unpacking your things he's already working on setting up the tents and starting a fire. Fishing, hiking, rock climbing, he tries to fit in as many outdoorsy activates into the weekend as possible. .

• Dallas takes a much more relaxed approach to camping. He brings a lot of modern amenities and prefers to sleep in his bus instead of out in the open. Spending most of his free time finding a good place to set up a temporary studio and painting

• Much to Jimothan's dismay, Parsley latches onto this laid back approach to camping and ends up spending most of his time with Dallas.

"C'mon, Pars, Marv told me the lake north of here is full of biters!"

"Uh, thank, dad...but I'll have to pass for today. Dallas and I are gonna go swimming though, so maybe I'll see you up by the stream?" Parsley was awkwardly dancing around his dad's enthusiasm and you weren't blind to the dejection and annoyance that was building in Jimothan's eyes every time Dallas stepped in to join one of their activities or offer an easier alternative to Jimothan's bare bones way of camping.

• Dallas really was just doing his best to be friendly even going out of his way to strike up conversation with Jimothan despite the older man's gruff attitude.

• Considering that Parsley never shared his love of camping, Jimothan gets pretty excited if you show interest in what he's working on or ask him to assist you with something. Though he does tend to take over and show you how to do it as opposed to just helping.

• You do your best to keep him from feeling left out but unfortunately this backfires and now you're the one he's waking up at 5am to go hiking. You had to admit you felt bad for him but you were beginning to understand what Parsley meant about his dad being a lot to handle. Still, it's actually kind of sweet. He really does just want someone to share a common interest with and pass all his tricks onto. He just lacked basic communication skills.

• Speaking of Parsley, he seemed to genuinely be enjoying himself this time around. He got along really well with Dallas, even modeling in front of the sunset for him at one point.

Unfortunately Jimothan’s over eagerness begins to wear on you and you find yourself tempted by the dark side. "You sure you don't want to stick around? Dallas is gonna show me how to make dream catchers." Parsley asked, scooting over to make room for you near the fire.

"I probably shouldn't. Jimothan already asked me if I wanted to go rock climbing with him."

"Rock climbing? You mean on that 30ft tall cliff by the waterfall? You nodded wearily. "Yeah, he already tried to get me to go too, buddy system and all that. But I get forced into that stuff every year. Missing it this one time won't hurt him."

"I don't know, he seemed pretty excited." Just as you were struggling with your decision Dallas emerged from his bus holding an assortment of crafting supplies.

"Heyy, little buddy, are you going to be joining us? I've got some pressed flowers you could use for yours, it'll fit your aesthetic perfectly~" Before you could answer, Parsley pulled you down to sit beside him.

"You bet they are!" Okay, maybe a quick crafts break wouldn't hurt.

• Before you knew it three hours had passed and you were doing outdoors yoga alongside Dallas and Parsley with flowers braided into your hair. The serene atmosphere only being broken by Jimothan stomping into camp. He was soaking wet and looked like he had taken quite the tumble. The annoyed look on his face only reconfirmed this theory.

"So...how was rock climbing?" Parsley asked nervously. The only response any of you received was a furrowed brow before he angrily retreated into the tent to change.

• After a bit of time he eventually returned and went about readying the camp for dinner. It was beginning to get dark so you, Dallas and Parsley were sitting on the top of the bus watching the stars. The view was nice but there was just one thing missing.

"Hey, Jimothan, you should get up here, the views amazing!" Parsley seemed to catch onto what you were doing and followed your lead.

"They're right ya know. It is pretty cool up here." Parsley seemed to finally have caught his attention and he looked to actually be considering it for a second but shook his head.

"Nah, you kids have fun. I need to get this fire started." There was a hint of sadness to his voice as he went back to smacking his wet flint and steel together. They must have been in his pocket when he took his tumble down the waterfall.

Dallas leaned over the railing at the top of the bus. "There's no need for that, my guy. If you can't get that started I've got a microwave in the back, we can have Pad Thai." He seemed to be trying to raise the mood but Jimothan didn't offer his addition so much as a glance. He did however huff and begin smacking the flint and steel together much more aggressively.

You and Parsley gave each other a worried glance but it was interrupted by Dallas placing a hand on each of your shoulders. He winked and seemed to be giving you a look that implied, 'let me handle this', before effortlessly vaulting over the railing and sliding down the side of the bus.

Without missing a beat he kneeled down beside Jimothan and pulled put a ligher. Quickly flicking it alight and holding it beside the piece of newspaper he was trying to start the fire with. "I feel you though, nothing like cooking over a real fire, right?"

• Jimothan looked at him in awe for a moment and Dallas just gave him a friendly smile. Then Jimothan threw down his flint and steel, stood up and marched off into the forest.

Parsley slapped a hand to his forehead and slouched backwards, "Oh boy..." You scrambled down the ladder to stand beside Dallas who was still staring in the direction Jimothan had stormed off in.

"Did I say something wrong?" He looked at you worriedly but before you could answer Parsley slid down the ladder to stand beside you.

Nah, not really. He's just...not good with change."

• Jimothan goes pretty quiet after that, eventually returning to huffily chop wood not far from the camp. After a bit you offer to go talk to him but Parsley steps up insisting that he should be the one to do it.

• You and Dallas sit by the fire, just barely being able to make out their shapes as they talked off in the distance. You couldn't hear what they were saying but just watching their silhouettes interact told the whole story.

• Jimothan seemed to be ignoring him for a while until Parsley picked up an axe and started chopping alongside him. There was an obvious struggle on Parsley's part that was enough to catch Jimothan's attention and soon he moved to show him how to do it properly. Adjusting the wood on the chopping block, showing him how to hold the axe right and demonstrating the proper chopping motion. He then stepped back to let Parsley try again, giving a small applause as he successfully split a log down the middle.

There a moment of stillness as Parsley seemed to be speaking then he walked forward and hugged his dad. Jimothan froze for a moment then hugged him back. They stayed like that for a bit and you almost wished you could have heard what they were talking about.

• Not long after that Parsley came walking back into the light with Jimothan close behind him. There was a clear bit of awkward tension in the air but Dallas was the first to stand up and apologizes for having done anything that may have upset him. This was enough to get Jimothan to speak up, and he insisted that Dallas had nothing to be sorry for.

"You're here as a guest. I'm sorry for causing a scene. If Parsley happy doing..." He vaguely motioned to Dallas's bus, "whatever it is you've been doing... then maybe I need to open up a bit"

Parsley was smiling at him proudly but he raised a hand, "Just a bit though!"

• The next morning all four of you went spear fishing then later that evening Dallas set up a projector and you had a little horror movie marathon. You even got Jimothan to make a dream catcher. It was a disastrous collage of fish hooks and rocks but he seemed proud of it so you hung it up with the others.

• Dallas plays the acoustic guitar and Jimothan plays the Banjo and as it turns ou the two of them have a mutual love of campfire songs. You're forever grateful to Parsley for thinking ahead and bringing an extra pair of noise canceling headphone for you because those two go on for hours. Seeing them both go all out together is incredibly sweet though.

• When it comes time to pack up and leave Jimothan offers Dallas a hand shake but Dallas goes straight for the hug. Leaving Jimothan to give him an awkward pat on the back as he half returned it.

• Parsley has already assured you that you're definitely coming next year, no exceptions. And who knows, they might even make it a tradition to start bringing some of the others as well.

#smile for me #parsley botch #jimothan botch #sfm #reader/flower kid #Finally finished somthing!#and there's more on the way #thank you all for requesting and reading!

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sick-in-luv · 5 years ago

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Yandere!Alien (Atlas) Pt1

A/n:Got this idea and just had to write it👽

Warnings⚠️: gore?

'So this is what they meant when they said humans are made of stars' Altas thought,scoffing as his hands dug deeper into the open chest cavity of the man laying in front of him. The smell of iron was heavy in the air as blood pooled around them,staining the overalls Atlas had taken from him

"ꉓꂦꎭꍟ ꂦꈤ! ꀤ ꀭꀎꌗ꓄ ꈤꍟꍟꀸ ꌩꂦꀎꋪ...ꍏꃅ ꃅꍏ!" The man was still alive,his quick breaths coming out gargled as blood gathered in his mouth. Atlas moved his hand up into the man's throat, his fingers wrapping around his larynx.

He pressed his pointed nail into the soft tissue,a glowing green liquid flowing into the mans veins,spreading across his face and neck. Atlas sighed as he watched the man squirm,his strength slowly fading.

"ᖘ꒒ꍟꍏꌗꍟ ꌗ꓄ꂦᖘ ꎭꂦᐯꀤꈤꁅ ꃅꀎꎭꍏꈤ. ꀤ ꂦꈤ꒒ꌩ ꈤꍟꍟꀸ ꓄ꂦ ꓄ꍏꀘꍟ ꀤꈤ ꌩꂦꀎꋪ ꒒ꍏꈤꁅꀎꍏꁅꍟ ꍏꈤꀸ ꌗᖘꍟꍏꀘꀤꈤꁅ ᖘꍏ꓄ꍟꋪꈤꌗ. ꅏꂦꈤ'꓄ ꌃꍟ ꒒ꂦꈤꁅ." True to his word,Atlas moved his hand out of the man only a few seconds later,a satisfied smile on his face.

"There! Ain't that much better?" He said gleefully,testing out his new voice,the slight southern drawl making him pause. "Weird,not what i expected it would sound like after i heard you scream."

Atlas shook his head " well I guess it doesn't matter. Now,lets close you up shall we?" He smiled,moving to stand up and walk back to his landing area to find the tool he needed.

He froze however when he heard a click,followed by something cold and hard pressing against the back of his head.

"M-make one move and I'll blow y-yer goddam brains out!" Atlas sighed and stood up,hearing the person behind him gasp and stumble backwards, falling over and dropping his gun in the process.

Atlas turned around and looked down at the terrified man,blinking in surprise as he saw the striking resemblance between him and the other man who was barely clinging to life behind him.

"D-demon" Atlas heard the man mumble as he picked up his shotgun,pointing it at the 7ft tall blood coved figure in front of him. "Y-you killed my brother"

Atlas frowned,trying to find the right words to tell the man that his brother wasn't dead. He moved forward only to stop when he heard a loud bang,followed by a seering pain in his side as the man pulled the trigger.

👽👽👽👽👽👽👽👽👽👽👽👽👽👽👽👽👽👽

You always loved coming to visit your uncle. His small cabin in the woods was so peaceful,a huge change from the city life that you were used to.

There was nothing but farmlands and forests for miles, so apart from the occasional sound of an animal,it was quiet.

You were alone in the cabin. Your uncle left earlier to go to work,leaving you to do what you wanted until he came back.

Of course, there wasn't much to do,so you opted for sitting in front of the old box tv in the livingroom,eating microwave pizza and trying to solve crossword puzzles

It wasn't much,but it kept you entertained. The TV was only on for backround noise,but occasionally something interesting caught your eye,like when the news broadcaster started talking about a foreign object entering orbit.

It didn't hold your attention for long though,because soon after she said that the signal cut out,leaving nothing but static on the tv. You sighed but didn't bother to try and fix it, only shrugging before going back to your puzzle.

About half an hour and 3 puzzles later you decided to go to bed,seeing as your primary source of entertainment was down and you already finished the last slice of pizza.

After a short shower,you threw on a oversized t shirt and went to brush your teeth,moving sluggishly through your suitcase to find your toothbrush.

After finally finding it along with your mouthwash and hairbrush,you moved back to the bathroom. You desperately tried to keep your eyes open as you moved the toothbrush through your mouth,nearly falling asleep at the sink before a loud bang sounded out outside.

You let out a short scream,your toothbrush slipping through your fingers as you jumped. You scrambled to try and catch it only to loose your footing and fall over backwards,hitting your head on the side of the tub.

You sat there for a second,toes curling in pain as your hands shot up to where your head was throbbing.

The pain subsided after a few seconds,and you cursed your neighbors for thinking it was okay to start shooting at this hour of the night,slowly standing up and making your way back to your room.

"Stupid Clive and his stupid guns. It's 2 am for god sakes. I'm gonna give him a piece of my mind when i see him again that no good little-" you stopped abruptly as you heard something shuffling outside.

"Whaaaatt the fuck" you whispered to yourself,slowly moving towards the front of the cabin to peek out the window. You grabbed a phone on the way,getting ready to call your uncle if it was something serious.

Pulling back the plaid curtain,you scanned the dimly lit porch,holding your breath in anticipation.

Once you were certain that there was nothing there,you let out a relieved sigh,moving to close the curtain and finally go to bed,when a very large blood covered hand slammed against the window.

You let out a scream,your knees going weak, once again sending you towards the ground. You grabbed the phone,filled with adrenaline as you started dialing your uncles number until-

"H-help. Puh-please! I-I need help" you paused putting the phone down and listening. You heard a pained groan followed by a weird chittering noise.

You slowly got onto your knees,peeking out the window,passed the bloody handprint,to see a person laying on the wooden porch,covered in blood.

"Oh shit!" You ran towards the door,not even hesitating as you threw it open,rushing towards the person.

"Oh shit oh fuck a-are you okay? Oh damnit! come on lets get you inside." The man groaned and sat up slowly,and you had to keep yourself from gasping at not only his height,but also the mess of unnaturall, almost glowing neon green hair on his head,almost completely covering his eyes.

"Holy shit." You heard the man let out a pained chuckle "wow your teaching me all sorts of new words"

You raised your eyebrow,wanting to ask him what he meant when he let out another groan. "Ah,lets get you to the bathroom yeah? We got a first aid kit in there i think." You quickly stood up,throwing his large arm over your shoulders and trying to help him up. He must've noticed your struggle, because he let out another chuckle and supported more of his own weight, only occasionally leaning on you as you led him to the bathroom.

It was only when you saw him under the florescent light when you noticed that his skin had a strange greenish hue to it,and he was wearing clothes that didn't really seem to fit him properly. You paid no mind to it as you helped him sit down on the toilet,frantically scrambling to find the first aid kit.

"What happened to you? You look like you were run over." You cringed at yourself. You really didnt mean to sound so blunt but you were still filled with adrenaline from the big ass scare he gave you.

"A silly human shot me with his primative weapon. Unfortunately i couldn't reach my ship in time to grab any of my healing supplies or any proper covering so i opted for finding the nearest form of civilization."

You paused at his words,slowly turning to look at him,first aid kit clutched in your shaking hands. You looked up at his tall form sitting calmly with his hand pressed against the wound in his side,his jet black eyes looking straight into yours.

Wait a minute

Black eyes.

"H-human? Ship? What the fuck are you on about my guy?" He smiled sweetly,showing off his razor sharp teeth. Al three rows of them.

Your eyes widened as you slowly backed away,causing his smile to fade. "Oh! Oh nono no human don't look so afraid! Im not here to hurt anyone! And I'm certainly not going to hurt you after you let me into your home"

You shook you head and stood still,not letting your gaurd down just yet. "How do i know your telling the truth? What are you?"

He made a little chittering noise,moving a bit of neon green hair out of his eyes. "Ah yes. I forgot your species hasn't had any public outside contact yet. My name is Atlas. I am what your kind know as an 'extra terrestrial' or an 'alien' or whatever" he stood up,slowly moving towards you.

He stopped just inches away and bent down to look you in the eye,his own black orbs glistening in the light. "As for the whole truth thing,well I really don't have any reason to lie to you pet."

He placed his large hand over the first aid kit,gently pulling it from your grip and moving closer towards your face,his nose brushing yours. You felt heat rise to your cheeks as he sighed softly.

"Your a good little human right? So i really have no desire to hurt you." He suddenly stood up straight, making you squeal softly. "But i do really need you to help me repair my injuries."

You let out a breath that you didn't know you were holding,before looking up at Atlas,who was struggling to open the box,turning it over in his hands multiple times.

After taking a few more deep breaths,trying to process everything,you giggled softly making him stop and look at you.

"What are you doing?" Atlas huffed and felt around the box again. "Where is the scanning device?? How do you open this stupid thing??" Your giggles turned into full blown laughter as you took the box from him,pressing the small latch and opening the box.

He looked at you in awe for a second before crossing his arms. "Primitive human devices" you snorted as you laughed harder ,bringing your hand up to your mouth to try and stop the noises.

Atlas gave you a deadpan look scoffing and sitting back down on the toilet. Once you calmed yourself down enough,you moved over to him. "Wow i can't belive i was terrified of you a second ago" you smiled pulling down the straps of his overalls.

He scoffed again and bared his teeth. "Oh you should be terrified now little human. Lauging at my struggles. How dare you" you laughed again,before lifting his shirt amd kneeling between his legs to be eyelevel with his wound. "My name is (Y/n) by the way. Not "little human" you stared in slight surprise at the odd dark blueish color of his blood before grabbing a rag from the box and covering it in rubbing alcohol.

Atlas made a noise as you pressed the alcohol covered rag onto his wound,leaning back to grant you more access.

He hummed as you continued to clean the wound,a small smile on his face. "I'll call you whatever i want little human" you looked up at him,confused at his happy tone.

"Doesn't this hurt? Why do you look so happy?" Atlas chittered again and looked down at you "I like the burning."

You blushed a bit and opened your mouth to say something before a loud knock came from the front door.

"Damnit what now?" You stood up slowly,throwing the rag in the sink. "Just be quiet,they'll think no ones home." You grabbed a bandage from the box and went to bend down again and finish fixing his wound before a familiar voice stated yelling at the door as the banging continued.

"(Y/n)! You in there? It's Clive! Ya gotta get out here i think that thing made its way into your house!" You raised your eyebrow and looked back at Atlas.

"Thats the human who shot me. He must've followed my blood the cretin." You sighed and put down the bandage "I'll be right back okay? Just lemme go take care of this."

You only got so far as the bathroom door before you felt arms wrap around you,pulling you back. "No! Your MY human. I wont allow that disgusting cretin anywhere near you."

You looked up at Atlas,who had his teeth bared. He was starting intensely in the direction of the front door,where the banging now turned frantic,along with the voices.

"Atlas just let me get him to leave. I won't be long i promise."

He looked down at you,his eyes gleaming dangerously. You squimed a bit,feeling his grip falter as you pulled out of his arms. "I-ill be right back okay?"

You pushed him back into the bathroom,closing the door behind you and making your way over to the front of the house.

"I'm coming Clive calm down." You sighed as you opened the door,putting on your best 'just woke up' look. "What do you want? Its really late."

Clive looked panicked. His flannel shirt was covered in a mix of dark blue and crimson and he had a shotgun in his hand.

"(,Y/n)! Thank God your okay! I was bouta break down the door cause i thought somethin' happened to ya. Theres somethin'out here. A demon or somethin'. It killed Marcus. It killed my brother" you stared at Clive as he sobbed,not sure what to do.

He couldn't be talking about Atlas right? He said it himself,he didn't come here to kill humans. You looked back at the bathroom and saw Atlas standing there,a feral look on his face. "Fuck" you whispered moving outside and closing the front door.

Clive calmed down and looked at you confused. "S-sorry Clive. I haven't seen anything. But if you want I'll call the cops for you okay? Or the ranger?" Clive ignored your frantic words and tried to move passed you to the door

"Are ya hidin' it in there? You are arent ya? Let me in there (Y/n). I'm going to kill that fucking thing!" You moved in front of him

Trying desperately to stop him from going in.

"Wait Clive you can't just-" you squeaked as he grabbed your arms trying,throwing you to the side and opening the door,his gun ready.

He moved into the house and you scrambled to get up and stop him,only to be pulled back down,a hand covering your mouth.

You looked behind you and saw Atlas glaring at the door,his sharp teeth bared. He picked you up and threw you over his shoulder,you groaned a bit as his shoulder knocked the wind out of you,and Clives frantic footsteps could be heard rushing back towards the porch.

Before he made it out the door,Atlas had already started running across the open field in front of the house.

You heard Clive yell something before running out after you,but at this point it wasnt likely for him to catch up.

"A-Atlas where are we going?" He let out a grunt and stoped,putting you down but not letting go of your arm. "We're going to my ship. That stupid human ruined everything. And he has the gull to blame me for his brothers death? Honestly."

You stumbled after him,desperately trying to keep up. ""S-so you didn't kill his brother?" Atlas scoffed. "Of course not. That idiot just got on the way before i could

Heal him."

You raised your eyebrow as he finally came to a stop,letting go of your arm and dashing towards the green and blue pod that stood on a scorched plot of grass. "What do you mean heal..."

Your question died in your throat as your eyes landed on what you recognized to be Clive's younger brother Markus,laying on the blood stained grass with a blank look in his glassy eyes. His chest was ripped wide open,displaying all of his organs.

"He got in the way of my ship before i could grab the device i needed to heal him. I never meant for him to-" Atlas looked up from his pod,having already found what he was looking for to heal his wound,only to see you backing away,tears slowly dripping down your face.

"Hey. Whats the matter? Huma-" Atlas was cut off when you turned around and started running back towards your cabin. He let out a low growl before sprinting after you,catching up in a matter of seconds and grabbing your arm.

You struggled as he turned you around,trying to get you to stop squirming. "Listen! I didn't kill him!" You struggled more as you heard Clive's voice in the distance,screaming for you.

Atlas growled again and pushed you to the ground,pinning your arms to your sides. "I didn't kill the human,but if you don't stop struggling right now I AM going to kill that one."

You instantly stopped,looking up at him with tearly eyes. "Wonderfull" Atlas said,picking you up once again and carrying you towatds his ship as Clive came into veiw.

"I didn't lie to you human." He started,gently placing your shivering form in his ship. "I didn't come to this dirt planet to harm any humans." He got in next to you and you could only watch as the ship fired up,flashing bright blues and greens before slowly starting to hover,just as Clive showed up.

"I came here to find a pet."

#yandere #yandere boys #yandere imagines #yandere oc #yandere x reader #alien #aliens #teratophillia #aliens man

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an-american-whovian · 4 years ago

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- An American Whovian Reviews: 'Revolution of the Daleks' by Chris Shitnall.

• The Story Thus Far.

When we last left the Doctor she was partaking in one of the WORST Doctor Who episodes of all time. Turns out she's had, like, a billion regenerations -- and started off as a cute lil' black girl who got experimented on by some crazy TimeLord lady. Makes about as much sense as an asshole on my elbow.

I digress, after that whole REVEAL -- the Doctor is arrested by everyone's favorite space rhinos and sent to space jail much like Rick Sanchez at the end of 'Rick & Morty' season 2.

(Just not as good.)

• Recap.

The story starts off with a reminder of an even shittier story 'Resolution' in which the Doctor and "Fam'" defeat a Dalek with spare parts from a microwave. (Fuck you, Chibnall.)

Anyways, back to now: some people have the leftovers of that one Dalek in some facility. This one dude is tasked with transporting it and stops fer a hot cup of coffee -- which he chugs. (That's a thing.) Shortly thereafter, turns out he got drugged by the barista and she's, like, "Bitch, this is my truck now."

• I Loved that Show.

Curtis from 'Misfits' and Mr. Big from 'Sex & the City' meet up with some lady in which he hired some folks to "roleplay" as rioters. (I can't make this up.) He's, like, "Check this out -- I made these robots that can subdue rioters." (Where was he during the attack on the Capitol!?) Actually, Curtis from 'Misfits' supposedly made them from scratch.

Somewhere Davros is rolling in his chair.

• Political Disintrigue.

Mr. Big and the lady are in cahoots. I don't care.

• Elsewhere.

The Doctor is in jail serving her sentence and eating space brownies. She's got a Weeping Angel, Sycorax, Ood l and the Pting as neighbors. (Everyone loves call backs.) Laying on her cot she does her best quirky Matt Smith impersonation when she here's a-knocking.

WHO COULD IT BE!?

• Elsewhere, again.

We cut to the Fam' back on Earth. Yaz is living in a house that's a TARDIS in disguise; whilst Graham and Ryan could care less about what happened to the Doctor. They're, like, "Yaz, you gotta move on. However, someone leaked that footage of the roleplaying rioters versus a Dalek on DailyMotion -- so we should do something about that."

The lady and Mr. Big meet up, again, this time in some forest -- fer more expository conversation. I still can't be bothered.

Later, the Fam' just tracks down Mr. Big, like, it's nothing. Fortunately fer him, he has has guards -- and they shoo off the Fam'.

Ugh.

• Slammer Buddies.

The Doctor sees a Silence and then, say wha'!? Captain Jack is there to break he Doctor out with some doohickey he snuck up his ass. Turns out it's a giant hamster bubble that let's them break out of a MAXIMUM SECURITY SPACE JAIL! I hate this shit . . .

It's great to see Captain Jack, again, but this isn't worth it.

Only 18 minutes has passed. Fuck me.

• Exposition Earl.

Curtis from 'Misfits' is talking to Mr. Big and he's, like, "Dude, did you know there's, like, DNA samples inside that old casing you gave me!? Well, I took the time to clone it! I call it Squiggly."

Curtis from 'Misfits' cloned a Dalek. Fuuuuuuck.

Mr. Big is, like, "Yo, get that abomination out of my face and burn it!" -- which Curtis from 'Misfits' hesitantly obliges. Psyche! Squiggly takes mind control over Curtis from 'Misfits'. Who didn't see that coming!?

• Elsewhere: Part 3.

The Doctor and Captain Jack SOMEHOW just get back to the TARDIS like it's nothing. Fer some reason the Doctor is a bit of a jerk to Jack eventhough he just got her ungrateful ass out of Space Prison.

She's, like, "I gotta find my REAL friends." and meets back up with the Fam'. Yaz gets wet and Jack flirts with Graham. Turns out the Doctor has been gone fer a little less than a year. Cool. They get straight to the point and are, like, "Daleks are back. You know, the same aliens that tried to conquer Earth in series 2 and 4. Oh, no one remembers that?"

Fuck you, Chibnall.

• Hilarity ensues.

Squiggly somehow has a giant facility with other Dalek clones in Japan. Where the fuck did they come from!? Who knows -- and who cares.

The Doctor confronts Mr. Big and he's, like, "I'm 3D printing Dalek casings. It's cool, tho'. There's nothing inside of them. It's not, like, there's a facility in Osaka, Japan with a bunch of Dalek clones waiting to fill these up.

Speaking of which, Yaz and Jack are in Japan and they have a cringey convo about life with the Doctor. Rose and Sarah Jane's talk in 'School Reunion' this is not.

There's still 40 minutes to go.

After their heart to heart -- Yaz still has the audacity to insult Jack. She's fierce!

Anyways, guess what they find!? GUESS WHAT THEY FUCKING FIND!? The Dalek clone farm. Like, we weren't already shown this before. They even do a "Dun-Dun-Dun!" reveal fer this shit.

FUCK YOU, CHIBNALL.

• Facepalm.

Fer reasons unbeknownst to me the Doctor takes Mr. Big along to Japan -- you know, fer reasons. All the while, we cut to scenes of that one lady introducing Daleks to the public. No one still remembers series 2 and 4 -- or any other time Daleks have been on Earth.

At the same time, Jack and Yaz get attacked by a bunch of other Squigglies and I'm getting mad hentai vibes.

The Doctor, still back on the TARDIS, has a half hearted conversation with Ryan and tells hims it's, "Four minutes to Osaka" -- eventhough there's 50+ years of the TARDIS landing places INSTANTENOUSLY!

FUCK.

YOU.

CHIBNALL.

Ryan is, like, "Yea, I kinda prefer being back home than traveling in the TARDIS and seeing all of time and space. By the way, how'd 'The Timeless Children' go fer you?"

The Doctor is basically, like, "The less said about that -- the better." I tend to fucking agree.

Four minutes are up and Jack has and orgasm when he sees the TARDIS materialize eventhough he was just on it not too long ago.

• Git 'er Done.

Everyone's reunited along with Mr. Big as they confront mind controlled Curtis from 'Misfits'. We get more exposition as to how these Squigglies were cloned and what they eat. The big revelation is that they eat humans -- and I still can't be bothered to care.

Somehow the cloned Squigglies can teleport to those empty Dalek casings and proceed to wreck havoc to the masses. I will NEVER grow tired of Daleks massacaring people. "EXTERMINATE!"

(I finally have a non ironic smile on my face.)

Squiggly kills Curtis from 'Misfits' and the only one to give a shit is Mr. Big. The Doctor tries her best at a, "I am the Doctor and I save people!" speech which falls flat. She's got a plan, tho'!

She beeps up real Daleks -- and she's, like, "These REAL Daleks are gonna kill those fake Daleks! It's okay if they come -- fer REASONS they wont kill any humans. Just these fake Daleks. The story demands it."

• Invasion of the Dalek Snatchers.

We finally get the revolution in "Revolution of the Daleks". The real Daleks are, like, "Y'all, mother fuckers, are impure!" All the while, Mr. Big is, like, "I like these real Daleks. I wanna be friends with them -- you know, 'cause I'm a bad guy. Take me to yer leader." (That last bit was a direct quote.)

The boys leave the girls behind to go destroy the Dalek ship. We get some more poorly written dialogue.

Mr. Big tells the real Daleks about the Doctor -- which they should've been already privy to. Luckily, Jack informs the Doctor about Mr. big's treacherous ways and she's got another trick up her sleeve! All the while, Jack and the boys blow up the Dalek ship and the Doctor reveals her ruse. She sucked the Daleks into the spare TARDIS that Yaz was living in and has it collapse on itself.

Aren't TARDIS kind of, like, living creatures? They've been known to have a consciousness. Whatever.

• The Home Stretch.

Fer REASONS Mr. Big is considered a hero. Captain Jack is, like, "I'm out and I'm gonna go find my Torchwood friends. Fuck you guys."

Ryan is, like, "Yea, no more trips fer me either. I wanna stay home and play football with me mates and eat fish and chips." Graham agrees, too. So it's just Yaz and the Doctor now. I'm excited fer that potential porn parody.

Then we get a call back to 'The Girl Who Fell to Earth' and Ryan trying to ride a bike. I forgot that was a thing. They babble about facing off alien threats on Earth and fer other REASONS Grace shows up a, like, a fucking Jedi Force Ghost. 😂😭🤤

• The Good, the Bad and the Fugly.

The best I can say about this story is that Doctor Who, aesthetically, has never looked better. The Daleks inside and out were REALLY well done; and I fucking love the look of the TARDIS traveling through the time vortex. Unfortunately, that's it about it.

This was god awful. Maybe in time I can rewatch this in a it's so bad it's good capacity; but I won't be doing that any time soon. Chibnall has lost his goddamn mind.

Why is everyone so mean to Captain Jack!? I don't fucking get it. Graham and Ryan wanting to leave the TARDIS just 'cause they're, like, "Meh. It's been done.? Why is Mr. Big in this, at all!? Also, somebody fire that composer! I'm tired of his ambient noises.

Seriously, this was bad.

Zero stars.

#an american whovian #doctor who #dw #whovian #review #nuwho #the thirteenth doctor #jodie whitaker #chris chibnall #revolution of the daleks #yaz #ryan #graham #daleks #chris noth #jack robinson #misfits

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mirainawen · 4 years ago

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Some headcanons for The Long Road that absolutely nobody asked for

Who’s the messiest one:

Everyone has their places that they are the messiest one in.

dean: when he cooks, he does not clean up the kitchen afterward. he reasons that cleanup is sam's detail, because that splits the work 50-50. most of the time, sam is okay with this because he doesn't particularly enjoy cooking and is tired of takeout. he'll bitch dean out in three circumstances: 1, he hasn't been there (fair), 2, he wanted to eat out (less fair), 3, DID YOU REALLY HAVE TO WRECK THE WHOLE KITCHEN TO BAKE A FRICKIN PIE (least fair).

when it comes to the state of his room, though, dean falls right between sam and adam. it's his space, so he reasons everyone can mind their own business. sometimes he is really on top of it; other stretches of time, he'll let things pile up / get out of place before he'll do something about it.

you so much as leave a to-go cup in Baby, though, and God help you.

sam: between the three of them, sam tends to be the most orderly and tidy. BUT, leave that man alone to his own devices in the library? he's probably fallen asleep atop an entire table of "organized chaos" of open books, pages of notes, a new (unimplemented) filing system, a dozen bookmarked tomes, and a couple dozen pens lost amid the chaos. sam in research mode + cross-referencing & digitizing & organizing the men of letters' archives into a streamlined and interconnected, coherent system is...a lot. just like A Lot. and it Shows. (and sam's loving every minute of it. utterly geeking out in his own head.)

adam: is a disaster child. he'll let shit pile up until he has to deal with it, or is otherwise bitched at enough by (usually) sam. he doesn't have a lot of stuff, so it can't reach actual problem levels in the bunker. but he's totally the kind to be like, "what the hell? how long has this been here? hey, guys, when did we eat at burger king? oh god, we should definitely toss that at the next gas station. what? no i'm not going searching for a trash can right now" about his car.

Who feels the most uncomfortable about PDA:

it is, get this, sam. i know, i know. hear me out. when given the option, adam can and will be affectionate within reason. he's the most uptight and gunshy about it at first, when he just gets out of the cage; tends to withdraw from people getting too close, always on edge; as a survivor of the most Traumatic Thing in the Universe, that is more than fair and expected.

once he's had time to find his footing with sam & dean, however, he'll greet them with a bro-hug, when appropriate, a slap on the back, a nudge of the elbow, lowkey affection like that.

dean came back from purgatory more affectionate than he'd ever been before. much more readily will not only greet with a hug, but say goodbye (even in 'casual' partings) with a hug.

that leaves sam, who used to be considered more mushy than dean by these terms. dean's lowkey affection he's used to. adam's? nah. no. especially in the first 5 years, for the amount of time that adam does it (before shit gets Real Bad). after adam gets out of the institution, he gravitates more towards sam naturally, even when pissed, and sam's kinda lowkey why is he in my personal space??? weird. because it doesn't innately fit the same kind of way it does with dean. post-reintegration, he's more affectionate after they've found their footing again. he tries to make up for the Bad Years with more slaps on the shoulder kind of affection. boy's trying.

Who’s the funniest drunk:

sam is a disaster drunk. he's the biggest lightweight of the three of them, which is funny because he's also the biggest, just like the biggest in general. dean becomes so much fun in unexpectedly different kinds of ways. like, he can be talked into karaoke. or doing some stupid shit he's gonna regret in the morning because odds are it's not gonna end well.

but adam is straight up hilarious. that sharp wit comes out, and all his inhibitions (and image) are gone so he just straight up cracks the worst jokes ever and gets away with it. they land. somehow they land. maybe because sam & dean are also drunk. maybe because he is just that funny. maybe it's that he has a tendency to get blackout-wasted and do stupid shit that makes no sense whatsoever, like shower with his f*ckin socks on and dean is never gonna let that shit die.

Who texts the most:

adam or dean. during large periods of time in the first 5 years, adam will leave dean on read and dean texts because read receipts means he knows when adam is checking his messages and therefore he knows adam is at least alive, if not entirely alright. by that view, dean texts the most.

but for random shit, that would be adam. he'll text dean something like

with either no caption, or something like: this reminds me you need to hit the gym, or looks like you have competition and doesn't give further context. dean doesn't mind because at least it means the kid's not dying in a basement somewhere.

he'll kick his ass for the fat comment later

Who reads the most:

it goes in this order:

sam "i read this entire book in one sitting cause i had the time, and now i am awake at 1am because i can't decide if i want to start another one since i have down time" winchester

adam "does it have cool illustrations? no? fine, at least tell me the lore on boobries is correct" milligan

dean "what job has the least amount of reading?" winchester

Who has the most embarrassing taste in music:

eff. ing. adam. even in his own car (where, hey, the rules are driver picks the music dean!) he's only allowed a certain amount of time for his "whiny teenage garbage music" (thanks dean) before he has to change it to something a little more tolerable (rock, at the very least). heaven help him if he hints at something country with dean around. dean will be like, sit your ass down it's time for REAL music 101 and put on Metallica for the 8th time.

Who’s better with kids:

adam, with dean a very, very close second! so close, they probably tie. adam, early on, isn't good with anyone because fresh-out-of-the-cage (even post-institution for a bit) makes him kind of a hairs-breadth triggered bomb when it comes to people of all ages. but adam a bit more balanced? a natural. he grew up around extended family, friends, wanted kids of his own someday.

sam, however, is the absolute worst. a pure disaster moron in this arena. when adam is de-aged? dean didn't think it was possible for sam to suck so much at something. (don't worry, the boy found his bearings. but oh man...the road to get there, paved with more potholes than road.) BUT when sam really tries? like if he lets himself relax and lowers his inhibitions, he can do pretty well. but he's mostly just Highly Uncomfortable around kids, and like, it Shows.

Who’s the one that fixes things around the house:

dean. put that boy in the garage, under the hood of a car, great. can do it all. put that boy in front of a little home repair? renovation? by god he'll figure it out. and he won't put a hole in the wall shut up sammy. he takes pride in the upkeep of the bunker.

sam, however, is much more content to just be like ah man i wish we had a shelf here. or, oh right we need to remember to do xyz and then sit back and wait for it to Magically Take Care of Itself.

Who’s got the weirdest hobby:

hobby? what the hell is that? a homeless person?

Who cooks and who cleans up:

dean cooks, sam cleans. adam cooks, sam and dean will rock-paper-scissors for cleanup. or leave adam to do it. sam is never allowed to cook. he's a horrible cook. they'd literally rather eat out than let sam cook. sam, of course, is highly insulted, but also like...he knows dean & adam are better cooks. they just are. yes, fine, he'll wash the dishes again.

every now and then he gives it a shot. surprisingly he makes really good pancakes. he'll cook just to force one of the others to have to cleanup when he's tired of being on dish duty. dean & adam are not impressed when he tries to leverage sandwiches for dish duty.

sam, somewhat sloshed on a saturday night will be like, guys! guys! hey why don't i make us food and dean and adam are like, duuuuuude. ...wait, no. sam- and he's like, no, guys, i got this, and brings them microwave burritos. and THEN they're like hey! no! this does NOT mean we're doing dishes!

#the long road #supernatural #tlr headcanons #dean winchester #sam winchester #adam milligan #ioannemos #i'm tagging you in this even though you did not ask for it

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bobasheebaby · 5 years ago

Text

70 Scrubs Prompts

Yup, another prompt list. Most of these are actually light and funny, though some are a little heavier. I tried to pick ones that would work outside of a hospital setting. Again it’s super long so cutting at 15.

1 “And who’s to say this isn’t what happens? Who can tell me that my fantasies won’t come true? Just this once ... “ — John JD Dorian

2 “Look NAME, I don’t know if it’s possible for me to put how I feel about you into words, but I guess I’ll give it a shot. I never really believed I’d find somebody that I love as much as you. I love you more than anything in the whole world. NAME, I love you more than FRIEND.” “Oh my god” “It's kind of hard for me to say, but it's true.” — John JD Dorian and Elliot Reid

3 “I grew up on the street ... No, not the hood. The Sesame Street.” — John JD Dorian

4 “As I looked at all the relationships around me ... Some that had gone on forever ... some that were reigniting ... and some that had just begun ... I realized something: It should have been me.” — John JD Dorian

5 “NAME, you can’t test love. When I met NAME, it seemed he/she was more in love with his/her best friend than with me.” “Honey, they’ve got that almond biscotti FRIEND loves, so I was wondering if I could borrow some money so I can get him/her some.” “No, you got him/her a present yesterday.” — Carla and Turk

6 “You’ve been wrong so many times that I'm not even going to say something is wrong anymore. I'm going to say that it's 'NAME'.

— Perry Cox

7 “I just took a pregnancy test, just tell me when a minute's up.” “I just put some pizza rolls on the microwave oven; the minute that bad boy rings we're good to go.” “Oh, my god, I can't stand it, 30 more seconds.” “OK baby, don't get too excited, they have to cool off for at least a minute.” — Carla and Turk

8 “So, uh, you going to lunch with your brother/sister?” “Yeah, I... well, you know, I would've invited you, but I already made the reservation for two.” “So call and change it to three.” “Ohh, I'm not gonna mess with that hostess. You know, she uses sharp tones.” — Elliot Reid and John JD Dorian

9 “Nothing in this world, that's worth having comes easy.” — Bob Kelso

10 “Yeah, I'm not that great with kids. They've got such tiny hands. It's creepy.” — Elliot Reid

11 “I love this moment so much, I want to have sex with it.” — Perry Cox

12 “Oh, my God! I'm gagging and vomiting at the same time. I'm... I'm gavomiting!” — Perry Cox

13 “So he/she has a cute butt. Everyone has a cute butt. I have a cute butt.” “You should bring it in someday.” — John JD Dorian & Carla Espinosa

14 “The problem with people who only want what they can’t have is that once they have what they want, they don’t want it anymore.” — John JD Dorian

15 “I guess when you care about someone, you’ll do whatever you can to make ’em happy.” —John JD Dorian

16 “The truth is, it is all your memories, the joyful ones and the heartbreaking ones that make up who you are as a person” — John JD Dorian

17 “‘Cause even if it breaks your heart to be ‘just friends’, if you really care about someone, you’ll take the hit.“ — John JD Dorian

18 “The easiest way to lose something is to want it too badly.” — John JD Dorian

19 “Sometimes in life when you get what you want, you end up missing what you left behind.” — John JD Dorian

20 “Sex is only good for two things. Making babies and revenge.” — Jordan Sullivan

21 “What's going on?” “I love you too dumpling, but I have to work late. I'll make it up to you this weekend.” “NAME’s on the phone with his/her mom/dad/parent, so we're taking five.” — Jordan Sullivan, Ted Buckland and Perry Cox

22 “By the way, NAME’s here but I'm not going to kiss and tell.” “Oh really? Cause I just got your text that said "bone city".” “Oh really? That came through?” — JD and Elliot

23 “You're gonna love it here, sport.” “Get out while you still can.” “Uh...” “Seriously, get out while you still can.” — Bob Kelso, Ted Buckland, and Keith Dudemeister

24 “Ted, what are you doing?” “I like to do stomach crunches after lunch.” “Ted, lunch was four hours ago.” “Yep, I wasted most of my Tuesday.” “It's Wednesday.” “Aw, man! I missed SHOW!” — John JD Dorian and Ted Buckland

25 “Well, it took a whole tube of gel, but I finally got my hair down.” “No one male or female ever cared, NAME.” — Ted Buckland and Perry Cox

26 “Thirsty, huh?” “Helps the tears taste less bitter.” “Cheers.” — John JD Dorian and Ted Buckland

27 “I have to get ready man. I want my date with NAME to be perfect. What do you think about a romantic horseback ride on the beach?” “Ooh, like you and I did for your birthday.” “Yeah but except this time with two horses.” — John JD Dorian and Turk

28 “I am wearing red. Should I not be wearing red around her?” “She's pregnant, she's not a bull.” — Elliot Reid and Turk

29 “This is why the headache didn't go away, it is actually pronounced 'analgesic', not 'ANALgesic'. The pills go into your mouth.” — Turk

30 [She/he sees NAME holding a beer] “What are you doing? [He/she threatens to open it] “You better not open that.” [He/she opens it] “Okay, you better not drink it.” [He/she takes a sip] “All right, You better not enjoy it.” [He/she expresses enjoyment, person A bitch slaps his/her beer] “Did you just bitch slap my beer?” “Are you calling me a bitch?” “Yes. Yes, I am!” — Carla and Turk

31 “Is there another guy on this planet who is that sensitive?” “Okay, let it out. I've got you. NAME has got you. Hold me tighter, a little too tight...There is a good spot.” — Turk and JD

32 person a “This plan is fool proof.” Person c “That is impossible. You two are involved.” Person c “We will see about that!” [Person a and c crash into each other as they try to walk away] — JD, Perry Cox and Turk

33 person a “I don't think we have anymore wine. NAME, can I have some of yours?” [Person C’s narration: I felt like NAME was starting to blame me for all of this.] [person b Spills his/ her wine in person c’s face) “I spilled mine too, honey. You know what you should do? Ask for some NAME’s.” [Person C Spills his/her wine on his/her crotch] “I spilled mine too.” — Carla, Turk and JD

34 “Wait NAME! I have an idea.” “You have another idea? Well I've got to tell you, I'm done with your ideas and not just for now but forever! Okay, are we clear on that?” “It's a good one.” “I'm listening.” — JD and Turk

35 “He/she is not allowed to dream about me. It gets too freaky in there.” “Cirque de Soleil freaky. One time, he/she was skinless.” — Carla and Turk

36 “How often do you make love?” “Twice today.” “Actually it was three times. You were asleep for the last one.” “Wow, that really happened? I thought it was weird that you were in one of my sex dreams.” — Marston, Turk and Carla

37 “How was your first stress-free day?” “Horrible. And you?” “Worse. Let's make a baby. If it doesn't work this time I'll kill myself.” “Not helping with the stress.” — Carla and Turk

38 “Dude, there you are. Two things; First, the aliens are here and they're wearing track suits.” “Oh, that's Nana.” — Turk and JD

39 “Are you nude right now?” “Yeah! How'd you know?” “Your voice is always higher when you're nude.” “That's true.” “It's not weird you know that at all.” —JD, Turk and Perry Cox

40 “You know, I actually like NAME. So, don't do that thing you always do.” “If you're referring to the game "Find the Saltine", relax. I don't even play that with NAME anymore.” [Later] “Behind your ear.” [Withdrawing Saltine from behind his ear] “My friend, you have found the Saltine. Uh, but, don't tell NAME we're still playing.”— Elliot Reid, JD and Turk

41 “Dude, he/she keeps a hug schedule with his/her friends!” “Okay, NAME ... looks like someone's getting crossed off their 2 o' clock spot and getting penciled in for never! How does that feel? Does it sting?” Person B Narration: He's hurting! Hug him/her ... hug him/her now! — Turk and JD

42 “Dude, don't sweat it - It says here that the ostrich is generally a docile creature.” “Thank God!” “It also says their kick can kill a man!” — Turk and JD

43 “Just don't repeat the same mistakes you made with me. For instance, don't speed down the road pretending your brakes are out. I don't care if it got you laid once in high school. It is not funny and I still have not forgiven you for killing that pony.” — Elliot Reid

44 “NAME, I don't photograph well. On my driver's license, I look like Gary Busey.” — Elliot Reid

45 “We have a very complicated past.” “Yeah, I hurt him/her, and I'm not proud.” Person B narration: I'm a little proud. — Elliot and JD

46 “NAME and I keep it superficial.” “Love the superficial. Dynamite teeth today!” “Oh thanks buddy!” “Sparkly.” “Yeah!” — Elliot and JD

47 “Will you tell me what NAME’s fantasy was?” “Nope.” “Did it involve chains?” “No.” “Whips?” “Mm-mm.” “Candle wax?” “No.” “Role-playing?” “No.” “Lasers?” “Mm-mm.” “Hamsters?” “Negative.” “Was he/she a Mexican apple thief?” “If only ...” — JD and Elliot

48 “Why don't you just move into my place?” “Oh, great, then we'll be two losers under one roof.” — Elliot and JD

49 “NAME, what you said before ... I knew you were right. Anyway, I'm sorry I got mad. You were wrong about one thing, though - we are moving forward.” “NAME, I'm thirty years old; I'm single, I'm homeless, and I'm pretty sure I just soiled myself.”

— Elliot and JD

50 Person A “Ohhh, my God, you're right.” Person B “Don't let him/her be your puppet-master.” Person C “Hey!” Person B “Hey.” Person C “What's up?” Person B “I have a headache.” Person C “Take some aspirin.” Person B “Don't tell me what to do! You're not the boss of me!” — Carla, Elliot and Jake

51 “I've never connected with a guy/girl like this before. I mean, even though it's only been two weeks, I already feel like I know NAME better than I know myself.” “What does he/she do for a living?” “I should know that.” — Elliot and Carla

52 “Look, the reason I've been acting so weird and having my friends hang around us all the time is because I really think that we have a shot for something great, and I don't wanna go and ruin it by sleeping with you too fast. I mean, what was I supposed to do?” “Well, you...you could have just told me that.” “Yes, but you're forgetting I'm a crazy person!” — Elliot and Jake

53 “I've seen the Wiggles live in concert ... twice.” “Did they perform 'Big Red Car'?” “They opened and closed the show with it. It was awesome.” — Perry Cox and Turk

54 “What's wrong with me?” “You're an annoying, whining man-child.” “That question wasn't directed to you!” “What question?” — JD and Perry Cox

55 “I’m notifying all my old boyfriends/girlfriends today that I'm officially off the market.” “I'm sure the 'pulse' setting on your shower head will be devastated!” — Elliot Reid and Perry Cox

56 “If there is one thing I have learned, it's that you can't schedule love.” “I think your credit card statement would beg to differ.” — Bob Kelso and Perry Cox

57 “Ladies and gentlemen, allow me to present, Man/Woman Not Caring.” [points to self] — Perry Cox

58 “If you're worried about people seeing your ass, do what all the other girls do and tie a sweater around your waist.” — Perry Cox

59 “Should I talk slower or get a nurse that speaks fluent moron?” — Perry Cox

60 “Do you actually listen to yourself when you speak, or do you find you drift in and out?” — Perry Cox

61 [thinking] Why don't I ever listen to me? — JD

62 “And you know what else? I quit!” “No you don't!” “Well I'm leaving early today!” “No, you're not! You're coming back to my office to do busy work!” “Fine, but I'm getting a soda first!” “Whatever.” — Ted Buckland and Bob Kelso

63 “Your dog is creepy.” “Aww...be nice to Rowdy. The guy we bought him from used to keep him in a box full of old hats.” — Elliot and JD

64 “I thought we cared about each other ...” “Oh please, if you didn't want to sleep with me, you'd have done the same thing.” “Well, I'll tell you one thing, the last thing in the world I wanna do is sleep wit'cha now!” “Do me right here.” “Okay.” “See!” — JD and Elliot

65 “Huh! I put all those fliers up, and nobody wants me to live with them!” “Oh, come on, NAME. I'm sure you'll eventually find a roommate who's a... clean, non-smoking vegetarian that rinses the shower thoroughly after each usage.” “Oh, well, if you don't, it gets mildewy.” “You know, you should move in with my friend: Anal McLooney.” — Elliot and JD

66 “You know, I've been thinking a lot about us lately.” “Me too.” “God, you drive me crazy.” “Oh, you drive me crazy!” “Sometimes I just lay awake at night, thinking about how unbelievably lucky I am to have you in my life.” “Sometimes you're so controlling it makes me want to strangle you..” — Paul and Elliot

67 “Tonight, I am going to make all of your fantasies come true.” “You know, NAME, I would be happy just to have sex above the covers once.” “Yeah ... never gonna happen.” — Elliot and Paul

68 “You know, it's funny... when I said "I love you," it was an accident - and I never really loved you at all.” “That is an absolute riot.” — Elliot and Paul

69 “Okay, here's what you do: First you say that, even though our relationship is ending, you don't have any regrets.” “Oh, my God! Are you actually telling me how to break up with you?” “You're right. Go ahead.” “If you could just start me off, that'd be super.” — Paul and Elliot

70 Person A “You never explained that U2 thing, did you!” Person B “You know, I've been thinking about it, and maybe it's not such a bad thing that that happened! Right? I mean, things have been going really well between us, and maybe it was fate! I could've been looking at my Bel Biv Devoe CD and said, "I love Bel Biv Devoe" - which I do, by the way. And I'm not ashamed of it.” Person A and B “That girl is poison..." Person A “NAME, look, I just think that if you guys are meant to get to this point, it'll happen... naturally.” Person B “You're right! "I love U2!" Dammit! Why do I always have to say every little thing that comes into my head!? Ugh, I really wish you wouldn't stand so close to me after you take your hummus break. See! I didn't need to say that! I'm gonna tell him.” Person C “Love you!” Person B “Love you more!” Person A “Ugh!” Person B “You know what - brush your teeth, then judge me!” — Carla, Elliot and Paul

#scrubs prompts #dialogue prompts #writing prompts #drabble prompts #scrubs quotes #john jd dorian #christopher turk #carla espinosa #perry cox #bob kelso #ted buckland #elliot reid #long post

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